#do what I am doing tomorrow day
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I wish all of you who have the energy to scream at Trans people to not support Trans-people. Would have this energy to step outside and help the communauty.
We really need hands particulary for Christmas, periods with the highest suicides risk. Hands for paperwork, food, money, anything. If this message manage to make 2 of you leave tumblr and give some hours at the local communauty, I would be so glad. We even could share an handshake and a soft drink.
#I have fight#so many of you#who just need to#touch grass#stop yelling#online#it's not helping the communauty#victim blaming#trans people#is not helping#trans#trans woman#trans man#This chrismas we organise a feast for all people who don't have a familly anymore#marseille lgbtqia+ center#I am in the paperwork for this event#we need#so much help at the bar and for food#and I am#reading some of you#and like#if any of you could give some of your time at local center#what a blessing#it would be#so please#do what I am doing tomorrow day#put down your phone#go help if you can#and I am pretty sure you will make new friend#with luv Judas
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do any other artists feel like. yeah you're a 'good artist' because you draw things that look nice, but like. TECHNICALLY? you're really not great
i really hate that i can recognise that yes, my art is good, but is it VARIED? is it dynamic?? is my anatomy good? is it full of texture and colour theory? do i know how to do This? can i do That? no, not really. and that's quite painful actually
#ramble#yes this is the artist's perspective bs and yes this is anxiety because it's 1am#and yes i'm forever learning and growing but also#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.#drawing my little guys is fun but i am not good enough for the industry right now and that fucking sucks#i really feel like if i walked into a studio with my portfolio right now they would laugh at me#one of those days where i wish i'd done a more useful degree y'know#i'm going back through the phase where i don't know what i'm going to be anymore and it's scary#some days i really want to give it up and never draw again and do something worthwhile because i Know my life would be easier#and i hate that something i love so much makes me feel so hopeless#signs that i should go to bed ^^^^#i will resume my pity party tomorrow
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double ?? upload ???? yeaaaahh i've gotten FASTERRrr for whatever that's worth so complementary blyla because guess what i miss them too (nobody was surprised by that)
#star wars#clone wars#star wars the clone wars#blyla#artists on tumblr#listen i just have a thing for jedi + clones it seems and we cannot forget dartain the ogs (i will draw that tonight + tomorrow not now)#tcw made aayla so cool bro i love her#can you tell i've been on a mellon_soup kick !! i love her references so much bro#one day i will draw foxiyo. that day may be tomorrow i don't know#prequel-era ships are elite sorry everything else is Lame except for han/leia rebelcaptain and kanera (reylo's fine ig)#tcw is also the only thing that salvages anidala for me however! this is not an anidala post i am getting so off-topic whoa#i am unmedicated.#anyway yayyyy double upload#by the way in my head the accelerated aging thing just straight-up doesn't exist#cuz it's one of the dumbest things star wars has ever done i think it just doesn't make sense#anyway ^^)b#listen i'm not ALWAYS gonna go the cheap route and do the gradient thing instead of color i just don't wannaaaa. too much work#“jedi can't have attachments!!!!” and you can't have fun apparently#besides attachment and .-+ love +-. are different things and the jedi USED to know that before they contracted stupid disease#aayla secura#commander bly#would've drawn bly's armor cause it's cool but friiiick dude i already did it for rex and I AIN'T DOIN' IT AGAIN#(will do it again for darman because i'm a masochist)#hey. he's a commando it's different#at least i finally get to throw my etain headcanons into the ring#why am i talking about other ships on a blyla post. whatever#i'll color something eventually. sketching is just significantly easier and more fun#actually scratch that heck y'all i'll do what i wanna do#(affectionate dw)#my art
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here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud!!
✷(print shop)✷
#mine#original#euheuhe hello..i hope everyone is having a good day#we are going on a bird boat thing on wednesday im very excited about it#what else.....me and my bf went on a walk on sunday and i saw damsel flies and shield bugs and a duck with 13 ducklings#i bought a jellycat sun bag which is now all i talk about#ive started reading assassins apprentice by robin hobb!!!! its so good!!!!#im so excited there are so many books in the series to read#i doubt i will like all of them but i will give them all a go#today i will stop and hve dinner n then walk the dog and then do exercise and have a bath#and then i will. play zelda#and then tomorrow i will do shop stuff and also help my mum buy a bench apparently#i need to buy snacks also. i hve a snack stash in my rooom bc of mental illness purposes and i am low.....need snacks#maybe i will do that tomorrow. brain schedule is full up for today sorry#also. unrelated. i have my period???? again????? ive already had it this month hello i dont need another im good im all done#my hormones r going ??OAGHGHGHUH#also i want like . cute bra. but like not a bra like just cloth thats like. tit shaped. a bralet? is that what that is? no idea#anyway. hve nice evening. or else.#i have a headache#OH ALSO. i need to legally chnage my name SKFSABJSBK#put that on th todo list#i cant rmemeber how 2 do it i think it was very straight forward n cost like. £10 or smth
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Redraw of my first post on this blog. Oh how far we've come B'*)
[Now with it's own redraw!]
#better drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#Credit where it's due: the first one is from November 2022. So its been a bit longer than the post date implies.#It was always part of the plan to re-draw my first wangxian art at the end of each season#but wow I really didn't give enough credit to the power of drawing every day for the last half a year#I've really loved doing this B*) I have found so much confidence in accepting the fact I'm not a 'non-artist' drawing mdzs comics#I'm a REAL artist drawing mdzs#and this is just the start!!!! I will keep drawing and improving and learning! and I will have a big smile like this every time -> B*)#I'm stunned that so many people found this blog so early on. Despite the roughness of my art...yall saw what I struggled to see#which was someone who was worth it#That and how art really is what you decide it is. I thought It had to be perfect. It doesn't need to be perfect. I see that now#I love you all so much! I am so much happier than I have been in years!#Sorry for being sappy twice in a row I promise tomorrow I'll be your little jester again
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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Whoever is attacking ao3 I hope you sleep terribly tonight, step in a puddle, have wet socks all day, and step on a fucking LEGO YOU PIECES OF SHIT
#ao3#ao3 update#i am going insane#what am I supposed to do#without my perfectly currated fanfic#I was 300k words into a 400k fanfic#and it was marvelous and now I have nothing#it’s been going down periodically all day#I hope whoever is attacking them has to worst day tomorrow
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Congrats, now all I'm going to be able to think about all day long is Chifeng-zun being stunned into silence by the sight of Meng Yao's braids, the same as if he had never left. His hand reaches out and clenches in mid-air, while Jin Guangyao stands shell-shocked and panicking, or blissfully oblivious to how Nie Mingjue's world is tilting on its axis. He could be mad, the rage that almost let him call the Unclean Realm home making Hensheng thrum: because what right does Nie Mingjue have to want him now, when he finally has a place he belongs? And why does want to quit it all for him?
Anyway, now you can share in my brain worms~
In that moment, something was communicated
unfortunately, neither knew exactly what it was
#i'm right there with you anon i'm constantly rotating these two in my head#mdzs#jin guangyao#nie mingjue#nieyao#jgy#nmj#perpetually obsessed with jgy's nie braids#''i am going to the effort of - every single day - doing up my hair in a way that directly reminds me of you. which very directly ties me t#you and your family. and then i am covering it up completely to ensure that no one - least of all you - will ever know they exist.#and then i'll take them out and do the exact same thing tomorrow. i hate you. i fear you. i want you dead. i will continue to do this.''#hi what does any of that MEAN#what does it MEAN meng yao???#and lord knows that nmj would never know. does jgy actually do it just for himself? if so what does that mean?#or did he do this with the INTENTION that nmj should ''accidentally'' see them? and if so what does THAT mean?#is this real? a ruse? if the latter how many layers deep does it go? is it worth figuring out? or is it easier just to get angry?#i feel so normal about it#what would he do if something dislodged his hat and nmj actually saw them? no idea but i want to read 100 fics with that premise#and see every possible permeation#my art#i'm not sure why i felt like going with this black and white style but i haven't done anything like this in years so it was fun#normally i do them with actual markers so this was honestly relaxing like easy mode
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Badly made comic of And So The Moon Wept bc it just finished and I’m devastated
‼���CHAPTER 15 SPOILERS‼️
I wanted to make one more page between the second and third bc pacing, but I didn’t wanna rethink all three of those pages’ compositions. It’s pretty ass bc it’s all sketches, but the last ones came out pretty decent I think👍
(Don’t look at the house too closely, I really didn’t wanna look at a reference so I just freestyled it)
Scrapped versions bc idk
Now that that’s out the way, I’ll start with the ranting, you can leave now this is for me
THE ENDING⁉️ DAMN⁉️⁉️⁉️
I would start rereading immediately to see all the details and analyze the psychology of the ‘tsukuyomi world’ characters BUT I unfortunately have my global exams next week 🥲
Warning for -1000 media literacy‼️ while writing all this I remembered that my memory is bad an my analytical skills are even worse! So be warned :p
BUT ANYWAY!! This was a top tear fanfic, seriously at no point did I consider the infinite tsukuyomi as a possibility. And I think this has to do with the fact that the psychology and individual lives of the characters in this dream were so well developed. There’s so many POVs! And they’re so complex and detailed!! Really makes you wonder if this was really the tsukuyomi or if Kakashi’s consciousness was sent to a different world all together. Which is what makes it so terribly tragic. Kakashi lived so many years in this perfect world just to regain all his memories and find out that it really was all fake, a world made up entirely of his own fantasies.
Oh and what a fantasy it was, getting hit by that boulder and fucking dying! The only reason he got to live was bc of ‘Hound’ (which could be interpreted as his consciousness telling him to wake tf up). Everything felt so wrong to Kakashi not because he noticed this things weren’t right, but bc he was never meant to live in this world. This was the prefect reality for everyone around him, his dream, a world without him (FUCK BRO💔💔💔💔). Which is the reason why I think the characters are so three dimensional in this dream, maybe, idk bro I just made this up.
But even then, things don’t exactly add up (if you think about it they do BUT SHHHHHH LET ME DREAM). Why did some characters suffer so much if this was meant to be a better world for everyone else? Why did Rin’s parent’s die? Why did Sakumo try suicide so many times?
We know Rin’s and Obito’s relationship started declining when Rin didn’t believe Obito when he swore up and down that Kakashi was somehow alive (which IS Hound’s fault in a way, he saved Kakashi and that’s why Obito saw Kakashi sinking into the ground, making him believe that Kakashi didn’t die), but it goes farther than that. Rin’s real problem with Obito was that he was so stuck on his dead teammate that he neglected the rest of his living team, Kakashi was literally everything he thought about to the point it started negatively affecting others (which, yeah him being obsessed is pretty normal considering that Kakashi was part of the reason he activated his sharingan and THE reason he activated the Mangekyo). So what did he do? Go hang out with the one other person who would ALSO only think of Kakashi all day, Sakumo. Obito eventually accepted that Kakashi was dead, but he and Rin never reconnected.
Was this really the perfect ending for them? Come on tsukuyomi, you’re more creative than that.
For some reason I think that the tsukuyomi was freestyling all this. Bc (by my interpretation) the point of Kakashi’s dream was that he died at Kannabi Bridge instead of Obito, period. The rest is extra stuff bc their lives have to go on ig? Or maybe the infinite tsukuyomi is really big brained and depicted a realistic depiction of 🖐️🖐️🖐️HOLD THE FUCK UP I’M DUMB I JUST FIGURED SMTH OUT
Bro this is why I need to reread this instead of talking to myself when I don’t remember half the details in the fic.
OK SO HOUND DID FUCK SHIT UP🔥🔥🔥
I was trying to think why Sakumo would be alive (if my shit theory above was true, which it isn’t but I’m not deleting all that) AND IT WAS BC SAKUMO NOT KILLING HIMSELF IS HIS PERFECT WORLD 😭😭😭😭. The one thing I’m not so sure ab is Kannabi (I bet if I keep writing this I’ll find the answer) bc Obito WAS gonna get hit by that rock, but hey, he entered the dream after the Obito reveal so maybe his consciousness already knew he would survive, so maybe he’d just appear later in the dream idk. BUT BRO 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 WAS HE ACTUALLY SUPPOSED TO COME BACK HOME TO HIS DAD??? AND THEN HIS CONSCIOUSNESS KICKED IN AND HE SAVED OBITO INSTEAD??!!,.. oh I’m sick, this is so evil
That would literally make everything make sense. He derailed the dream so bad that it fucked everything up, making it no longer a perfect world but more similar to reality. If he really was supposed to die, then why did his death have such negative repercussions on everyone he loves? It that was his dream, wouldn’t it be a better world with everybody happy? He wasn’t supposed to die at Kannabi but Hound appeared and saved Obito from a rock, causing a massive butterfly effect.
Pretty romantic if you asked me, “I would leave behind my perfect world just to save you form getting hurt” like damn, it’s not like he remembered that Obito survived at this point in time, but still STOPP I’M DOING IT AGAIN I’M FOCUSING ON THE DETAILS AND NOT THE BIGGER PICTURE AAAA
El cazador de elefantes by Def Con Dos is a pretty good song, hm
Where was I going with this? Don’t remember tbh
This is kinda long, I’m stopping here. Bye internet void ���️
#and so the moon wept#astmw#kakashi hatake#obkk#kakaobi#kkob#obikaka#obito uchiha#fic rec#bro imagine this wasn’t tsukuyomi but Kakashi’s consciousness really was sent to another reality#obito salty bc it’s midnight and they have a mission tomorrow: wtf do you mean what colour is the moon#kakashi stressed bc he just regained all his memories and all these years might’ve not been real: just respond bro#obito being sarcastic: well obviously it’s red! 😒🙄#and then kakashi fucking dies#it would be so funny actually#oh YOUR kakashi’s dead#ours is just fine over there#points at the most depressed man alive#the reading comprehension devil got me bro#dw I just need a few days to think all the story over#i’m just too excited now that it’s over and am focusing too much on details#and many of the details I don’t remember yet bc my memory is ass
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📸: Sthef Narciso
#staaaaaaarrrrr and arrrrrrrmmm#5sos#5 seconds of summer#ashton irwin#ashton#ai live at the belasco#instagram#other ig#kh4f post#and his smile 🥹#trying so hard not to go on a tag tangent about his thigh 😌#🤫 or armpit Crystal istg do not drive people away with your armpit content again 🤫#anyways i am obsessed with this pic#and also this man#i cannot wait to dive into the content tomorrow#today was recovery day (and honestly it felt so good to not be online at all 🥰)#but tomorrow i face the reality of what i witnessed 👄#anyways#arm
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You doing ok?
hi
#i'm alive. simply being chewed upon by multiple things#work is more stressful than i'd like it to be. for instance i'm hoping that i submitted my time off notification for tomorrow correctly#because otherwise it might read as a no call no show and i would . like to continue having a job#now to be fair. i do have it on the system that i requested it at the beginning of the month and i emailed my supervisor about it last week#so even if i didn't submit it correctly i'm likely in the clear#but nonetheless. i also got a firm talking-to the other day and now i am on ✨thin ice✨ for dicking around too much#because they track ur idle time at my work (computer) and mine was Quite High so my supervisor was like man what the hell is this#but even though she was kind of baffled at me spending so much time dicking around#she couldn't even really be all that mad in the end because i'm still doing good numbers and have made no (zero) mistakes#so she was just like. it's kind of impressive that your numbers look this good when you literally have 50% idle time#so she goes imagine what you could do if you weren't wasting so much time#and yeah i can whip out some Really Good Numbrers when i put the effort in.#so the problem is not my numbers it's just that i'm not spending long enough doing my tasks for the day#but i don't want to drag out those tasks intentionally so i've just been upping my own standards/goals#as much as i hate giving any more of my brain power than is necessary to giant corporations#it's still easy to feel smug after you get Talked To and then immediately turn around and show off#like yeah i coulda been doing this good the whole time. literally pulling up by 20 points. i just didn't want to.#trying to keep everyone's expectations low but accidentally toed the line of um. not working enough to keep my job#...anyway. EAS national weather system issued a . hi#i haven't forgotten about all of you i'm just having trouble tracking all my shit that i got going on ✨ yaaaaaaay#im gonna post things on AO3 soon. i promise. my weakness is that i get sidetracked trying to unwind from work#...i know i said 'soon' last time. but this time for real#asks#not sexy#anonymous
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8/16/2024 furball pup going "bwuh???"
#I am not a regular user of bwuh?? or guh??? what do you meaaan? 'xD /light-hearted sarcasm#{❤️Critters.exe💗}#<- block this tag if you dont want to see these!#{❤️Critters.png💗}#{❤️2024 Art💗}#{❤️Misc Critters💗}#cookie run ovenbreak#cookie run#I think I'm getting a lil more energy back so here's hoping I stick to schedule better >:D!!!!#I hope y'all's days are good#I am wishing you a very remember to drink water- selfcare and take yer meds if you gotta!!!!#Ill be back with another tomorrow <:3- thinking of finally fulfilling the cream wolf playing tug of war with the cake hounds request now th#at it may come out okay >:3
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words of affirmation: it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay
#it's been barely 2 months i cannot go through this again wtf is this doc doing i don't get it atleast give me something some causes anything#that tells me what triggers this so i can avoid it. i am good at following instructions i will do anything just give me something other than#oh rest and take these meds for 10 days and you'll be good viola ++ again it's almost near to my period time which is HELL#sure i will go to different doc tomorrow but i don't trust any of them anymore like i genuinely feel so hopeless is there nothing else i can#do other than just chugging meds why me always
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Preview of the runner up results from this poll. I wish everyone who wanted to see more SVSSS characters from me a merry "I'm So Sorry'.
#poorly drawn SVSSS#SVSSS#mobei jun#shang qinghua#Preview of a much bigger and sillier post while I spend the next few days trying to figure to how go-karts work#I had way too much confidence in my emerging artist skills...I am still going to try my best!#but yeah...I ran out of time to draw today. If the full post isn't tomorrow's upload then it will be monday's#I wish I had more time in the day to do the things I need to do...but alas...#This is one hell of a debut for these two but I think we all know how it goes on this blog.#I unfortunately do not know these two very well besides what I have absorbed through fan posts so these designs are *very* subject to chang#All I know is that MBJ always has his honkers out and SQH looks like he wants to burrow in woodchips for the next decade#50-50 chance I'll unhamster SQH next time I draw him#Mousexian is a prominent feature in my sketchbook and now Shang Qinghamster and join him in being 'unseen beasts'
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Aw man...
#Vent incoming wee woo wee woo#Goooood man I feel so. Stressed and anxious cuz of my job#I hate it. I hate trying not to cry every 5 minutes#I hate the feeling in my chest. It's like someone is poking really hard into it#It's almost suffocating#I feel awful. Every little thing makes me angry. I don't want to be angry at ppl who did nothing wrong. I don't want to be like this#I really wish I wasn't like this. Why can't I be more calm and normal#I feel like I need a good cry. But I don't have anywhere to go for that#When I'm at home I don't feel like crying cuz I purposefully distract myself from stress#But I do feel like crying at work#But ofc I can't cry at work#And even at the end of the Day when going home I'm too tired to cry. Plus it would look weird for other ppl walking by...#I hate this. I get all stressed durring work but then I can't let it out#I have work rn. And tomorrow#I'm just gonna have to feel awful until my Days off come#God. I really hate venting. I don't like ppl seeing me like this but. I don't have anything else left to relieve the pain#I just don't know what to do anymore#Where to go#Whatever. This feeling will go away eventually#It will come back ofc#I just wish there was a better way to ease the pain. But again. I don't have a place for that#So I'll just have to seat w these feelings until they go away#I'll try to keep myself distracted. Which will be hard cuz I. Am at work. The place which makes me feel these things in the first place#But whatever! I'll try anyways#I'll look at art. Or I'll think about characters that I like...#Save me fictional characters. Save me!!#Anyways. Vent over 🎉
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I'M ****ING FREEE
#I MEAN#NOT REALLY#BUT I DON'T NEED TO RIDE ANYWHERE TOMORROW#AND MY HEAD ****ING HURTS FOR NO REASON#AND I HATE ILLUSTRATOR AND INDESIGN AND PHOTOSHOP AND GRAPHIC DESIGN#HOW THEY MANAGE TO EAT ALL MY NERVES#I JUST COME BACK HOME ALMOST AT NIGHT AND HAVE NO TIME AND SIT TO DRAW A LITTLE BIT AND OH MY GOD WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S 2 AM AND OF COURSE#CAN'T WAKE UP ON TIME AND I'M A SHITTY MESS TOMORROW AND CAN'T EVEN SLEEP FOR 6 HOURS AND THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT I HAVE TO RIDE FOR 3-4#HOURS IN SUMARRY AND IT IS SO EXHAUSTING JUST BECAUSE YOU DO IT EVERYDAY#RARRRRRRAAAAAARRARARRARARARARRRRRRR#RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR#ONE DAY IS NOT ENOUGH FOR ME#OH MY GOD I NEED TO DIG THROUGH SO MUCH
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