#do we respect my man jake at all. real question

[livvyofthelake]

life going so nothingly my biggest dream right now is to rewatch a movie i like. you cannot fathom how much i want to be able to do that. alas!

[chlorinecake]

❝ DON’T WAKE DAD ❞ — ✿ 𝐏.𝐒𝐇 ׅ ㅤ֢ ㅤׄㅤ .

── 𝓈𝓎𝓃𝑜𝓅𝓈𝒾𝓈 ܃ Sunghoon was your stepbrother, and ever since your two fractured families merged into one, he’s had feelings for you. Deep down, he knows the attraction is wrong, but the taboo of it all only made it more addicting to him…

𝒸𝑜𝓃𝓉𝒶𝒾𝓃𝓈 ｡｡｡ KINKTOBER SPECIAL, swearing, kissing, mentions of virginity loss, oral (m. r), masturbation (f. r), stepcest kink, cum eating, manhandling, face slapping, hair pulling, breath play, unprotected sex, dirty talk, mentions of 02z, reader is younger than sunghoon & has long hair, short parental argument, that’s all

𝐖ORD 𝐂OUNT ⨾ 4199 — 𓊆ྀི Day 10 𓊇ྀི

“She’s hot as fuck, I can’t help it…” Sunghoon sighed while readjusting himself in his seat just at the mere thought of you.

He and his two friends, Jake and Jay, were hanging out in your step-father’s backyard near the pool, helping themselves toa few cold drinks and some conversation while round about the outdoor table.

“Who fucking cares, dude?” Jake asked rhetorically, his Australian accent rugged and thick with utter confusion and disgust.

“Exactly bro… you’re playing with dangerous fire here, Hoon, and trust me when I say you don’t wanna mess with that step-sis shit…” Jay added, crossing his legs where where he sat.

“Why not, though?” Sunghoon challenged, pulling out his phone to swipe a few notifications clouding his screen.

“Well, for starters, screwing your step-sister in real life is a lot more tricky than how it’s shown in pornos… secondly, you two could be blood-related for all you know!” Jake pitched in, spreading his arms as if to convey increased importance.

“Please…. I highly doubt that…” Sunghoon scoffed, shaking his head at his friend's cautious protest.

“Right… and what makes you so sure then, huh..? You’ve taken any DNA tests lately?” Jay questioned matter-of-factly.

“Of course not, idiot, but that’s beside the point—”

“She might have the same dad as you!” Jake went on in a fit of concern.

“Not possible… my father had a vasectomy before I was even born, and my step-sister’s younger than me…”

“Then you all might have the same mom, it doesn’t matter! You never know with this type of stuff, dude—”

“Wait- Shhh…” Sunghoon whispered, just as a woman’s voice in the distance filled his ears until you eventually walked by.

“Hey, Hoon!” You chirped, paying a brief yet respectable wave to his friends as well, “Your dad’s been looking for you all afternoon, by the way…”

“Oh yeah? What’s up with him?” Sunghoon asked in between taking a sip from his soda can.

“He said something about you leaving the garage door unlocked last night?… I don’t know, maybe he just wants to talk to you about it…”

“God… I mean, okay, uh… thanks for letting me know, sis…”

“Mhm,” you hummed with a nod, right before turning on your heel and walking back from whence you came...

“Dad?” Jay repeated with confusion.

“Sis?” Jake added, just as confused.

“Yup… and we don’t look very similar now, do we?” Sunghoon offered with a proud smirk, taking the last sip of his cherry cola with a clenched jaw and sighing at the fizzy sensation.

“Fine, but what difference does it make when you live under the same roof and share a set of parents, biologically or not?” 

The space felt quiet at Jay’s sudden comment, with nothing other than chirping birds in the distance filling the void. 

“Look man, I gotta go now, but please, at the very least… consider… our advice,” Jay said in a more solemn tone before shuffling from his seat and standing up to walk away.

“Yea… I mean… I’ll consider it,” Sunghoon nodded nonchalantly while waving his friend off, but Jay didn’t see it as shady because that’s how Sunghoon always acted…

Numb, absent, impetuous.

It’s those precise qualities in him that initially earned your attraction, and they were the same qualities that eventually made you stick around…

1 hour later…

“It’s so pretty, Hoon…” you admired from beneath your step-brother, trailing an inquisitive finger along the underside of his cock as he nearly dug crescents into the palms of his hands from how tightly he balled his fists.

He was just so, so sensitive…

“Can I now?” You asked softly, eager to finally have his cock in your mouth and stretching your slutty little lips apart with his thickness…

And to no one’s shock, he was just as eager to have your mouth around him, too…

Of all the private time you’ve spent with Sunghoon, you two had tried almost everything in the books from dry humping, nipple sucking (on both sides), vaginal sex, cockwarming, and even mutual masturbation on some accounts…

Though, you had never tried giving him oral before, and it’s an act that’s been on your mental bucket list for quite a while now.

“Go on, angel,” Sunghoon groaned, watching intently as you began prepping him by stroking the base of his length, and he swears a hand has never felt so good around his cock before.

Your step-brother, being the handsome guy that he was, had his fair share of sexual experiences in the past…

However, once he met you, or more accurately, once y’all crossed that dangerous physical boundary, he fell in love with you in a way that would never be considered brotherly.

Simply put, you were the best at everything to him; making him feel better after a bad day, listening to his most profound thoughts when no one else would, etc etc.

And it helped that you were one of the most beautiful girls he had met, too…

The first time he had sex with you, he remembered gazing at your cunt first before sliding himself in, and he felt so bad for having to be the first one to stretch you out.

You were so tight and fragile and he was so thick and long that it took more than a few tries just to have sex properly…

But since then, you became his little fuck toy, and he simply dreaded the thought of some other guy getting to enjoy those parts of you one day…

The parts he worked so hard to cultivate in you… the parts that he felt should be for his eyes and his eyes only…

“Ohhh, God,” Sunghoon groaned suddenly, sealing his pretty brown eyes shut at the feeling of your lips sliding along the center of his shaft.

His tip, the most sensitive part of his cock, found utter bliss in the back of your tight throat, and his tense hips subconsciously bucked into your mouth, causing you to tap his thigh as a sign to slow down.

“Sorry,” he whispered, tucking your hair behind your ear to prevent it from getting in the way, but you couldn’t help yourself from marveling at the way his length twitched inside your mouth, its tip already crying out precum as you kept bobbing your head nice and slow.

And it was genuinely such an honor to be sucking him off, considering how much he had done for you in the past… things that your parents never had to find out about because he was there to help you.

For instance, you vividly recall the time when a deadbeat date you met at a party dropped you off on the side of the road after you rejected his sexual advances, and Sunghoon was the only person who answered your call that night…

That same night marked the first night you kissed each other… in his car at a red light on your way home, to be precise… 

And you cried the rest of the drive back to the family mansion until Sunghoon managed to finally calm you down with a hug… one that led to him sleeping in your bed that night with his clothed cock slowly rutting against the curve of your ass…

You remember pretending like it didn’t happen for a while until eventually, the taboo craving was reciprocated in you; you wanted Sunghoon just as much as he always wanted you…

“Fuck, baby… ‘m so close,” your stepbrother groaned in pleasure, keeping his hands in your hair because it was genuinely one of his favorite parts about you, “Yea… keep drooling around my fat cock, baby… just like that… shit~”

You squeezed your thighs at Sunghoon’s desperate dirty talk, feeling yourself getting more and more turned on every time he swore beneath his breath.

“Go on, angel… touch yourself for me,” he mewled from above you, compelling you to do exactly what he just suggested.

Slipping your fingers past the waistband of your skirt, you found your core instantly given how you weren’t wearing any underwear.

You slid your digits over your folds while still sucking his dick before humming at the feeling of your aching clit finallygetting some attention.

“Didn’t know sucking my cock would turn you on so much,” he snickered through a smirk, only to groan once again as you hummed around his dick, reeling him even closer to climaxing.

With just a few more bobs of your head, Sunghoon was finally coming undone, screwing his thick eyebrows shut with his head thrown back.

His thumbs slowly outlined the side of your hairline as he looked back down at you with pure affection, slipping his cock out of you as cum coated every surface of your mouth—

“C’mere, princess,” he whispered in a raspy voice, finding your lips in the sweetest kiss as your tongues intertwined, all while you still stimulated your clit beneath your clothes…

And as if you weren’t feeling a bit lightheaded already, you definitely were now, feeling your hips spasm the more and more his tongue ran against yours.

Before you knew it, you were crying out Sunghoon’s name into his mouth and creaming all over your fingers.

“Shhh,” he cooed while holding your head in place with a gentle hand, backing away only once so he could see the look on your face as you finished.

It was such a beautiful sight to him, too… the way your eyes brimmed with tears as you bit down on your lower lip, trying to keep quiet but failing nonetheless…

He loved every part of it—

Knock, knock, knock.

“Sunghoon, are you in there?” Your mom called out from behind the door, just mere feet away from you two.

“Uhh, yeah, what’s up?” Sunghoon asked as calmly as he could manage while you both worked on readjusting your clothes back.

“Your father’s ready to have dinner with everyone,” she continued, trying to listen in on what was happening on the other side of the door, only to have her ears filled with the sound of shuffling.

“Alright, I’ll be down in a minute,” Sunghoon answered, just as you stood up to kiss him again, desperate for more.

“Great… I’ll go and tell your sister to join us, too,” she said before finally walking away, and you smiled even deeper into the kiss as Sunghoon’s hands found your body, guiding your hips closer against him.

30 minutes later…

“Why’re you making such a big deal out of this, Dad?”

“Because you’re too irresponsible for your age,” your stepfather scolded at the dinner table, the awkward clinking of silver forks against glass plates filling the room.

“Just because I forgot to lock the garage back on one night?”

“One night is all it takes for someone to come in and rob us, son,” his dad argued in between chewing on a piece of steak,“if you ever want this property or anything in the family estate to be yours, you better start acting like it belongs to you already…”

“But I do, Dad… can’t you see that?” Sunghoon asked with frustration in between eating some rice from his plate, “I keep the pool clean, cut the lawn weekly, and help out with bills, what else do you want me to do?”

“Lock the garage door back at night. Let’s start there,” his dad said plainly, and Sunghoon simply scoffed at his words.

“Right… got it, sir, but I’ll be excusing myself now,” Sunghoon said while getting up from the table with his dad in unison.

“No, you sit back down and finish eating so you can help your mom and sister clean up… I’m going to my room…”

“Ugh,” your mother sighed, getting up from the table and following in the exact steps as Sunghoon’s father did, “Sorry to leave you guys hanging, but I think I’m gonna call it a night and just chill out with your dad…”

“Oh… yeah, that’s fine,” you and your stepbrother smiled softly while getting up to wash dishes, “have a good night…”

“You, too, guys,” she smiled softly with her hands clasped in front of her before eventually leaving.

In the meantime, you got started on loading the dishwasher and wiping the kitchen surfaces; Sunghoon helped by sweeping and taking out the trash.

Afterward, you and Sunghoon sat on the living room couch and talked for a bit, the sound of the dishwashing machine thrumming in the distance.

You remembered his friends kept giving you weird looks earlier, so you decided to ask Sunghoon what they were talking about as a conversation starter.

“Oh- nothing, really… they were just curious about who you were, is all…” Sunghoon answered plainly, gentle clicks coming from his fingers as he toggled with the TV remote, searching for something good to watch.

And you knew it shouldn’t have affected you so much, but you could almost feel his hands all over you again just from looking at them…

You could feel the way his fingers were cupping your face earlier, and the way his palm felt resting on the small of your back as he kissed you that evening—

“Wanna watch something scary?” He offered, interrupting your brief thoughts.

“Do we even have a choice?” You returned while glancing at the screen, shocked to see there were predominantly horror movies playing tonight.

“I swear, it's like people never get bored of having scary movie marathons,” Sunghoon shrugged before eventually turning the TV off.

Currently, you were both sitting opposite to each other on the couch, up until your stepbrother patted the empty space next to him, signaling for you to come closer.

You laid your head on his shoulder, and the warmth of his body radiating through the cotton sweater he wore made you sigh in comfort.

“What, you're getting sleepy already?” Sunghoon asked with a soft smile, not expecting you to have snuggled against him so suddenly.

“No,” you said, reaching for his pale hand before tracing the nail beds of his fingers with your own, “just wanna enjoy this gentle moment with you...”

“Oh... Seriously?”

“Mhm...” You hummed against him, making the smile on his face linger for a little longer, “Can I ask you something?”

“Yea, what is it?”

“Well... hypothetically speaking, if your dad left his bedroom door open all night, how much do you think we could get away with in here?…”

“____...”

“Relax, it's just a question,” you pouted, letting go of his hand and touching his tense thigh instead.

He gulped before answering.

“Okay then... hypothetically speaking... I know I could keep quiet during a lot of things, but you on the other hand...” his voice trailed off as he gave you a knowing look instead of finishing his sentence.

“What? Finish what you were gonna say, loser,” you chuckled, sitting up to look him in the face now, but judging from his cheeks alone, you could tell he was a bit flustered about something...

“Hey,” you spoke softly, moving your hand from his thigh and cupping his face instead, but it didn't stay there long before he was pushing you on your back, caging you beneath him on the sofa.

“I think it might be better if I just show you instead of telling you, hm?” He whispered, dangerously close to your face, and you felt your heart rate increase while caged beneath him…

Not because you were nervous, but because you knew your parents were likely still awake, and you’d hate to get caught in a position like this.

“S-Sunghoon, maybe not in here, okay?” You began with shaky breaths, trying to keep your voice as low as possible now,“It’s too risky…”

“Shhh,” he whispered again, right before leaning down to kiss you, and you hated how it was truly that easy for him to win your submission.

Sliding a hand over your breasts, he found your neck in his grip, gently but firmly.

Though, the pressure only increased from here, and it was enough to make you squeak.

“You’re seriously getting all noisy, and just from that?” He judged you with a snicker, “If you want me to fuck you, y’know you’re gonna have to stay quiet, pretty… think you can do that for me?… hm?”

You could only manage to whimper in response, and he finally freed your neck from his rough hand, at first you think it’sbecause he’s easing up on you, but then you realize that he was just getting started.

Sitting up, he tugs your pants down to your thighs, only to have you immediately pull them back up again.

“Do you really wanna force me to get rough with you tonight, baby?” Sunghoon slithered, cupping your entire cunt in his hand before grinding his palm against your clothed sex, and he almost laughed out loud at the way you squirmed now.

“I can’t believe you’re being this s-stupid right now,” you stammered, but you couldn’t stop your hips from subconsciously bucking against the delicious friction he provided.

“Look at you… rejecting my advances only to grind against my hand like a bitch in heat,” he retorted, spitting in his free palm before slapping you across the cheek, the added moisture only adding to the echo of the impact.

You wanted to curse him out, kick him, punch him, or even just yell at him for doing that to you… but someway, somehow, you felt your body freeze at his gaze, and tears erupted from your eyelash beds in the same way they did the first night he kissed you… the first night he claimed you as his…

“Now, you know I didn’t wanna have to do that, sweetie,” Sunghoon pouted with a hoarseness to his tone, and you immediately felt his erection brush up against your thigh.

“As my little sister, you’re supposed to obey me, no matter what I ask of you,” he continued tenderly now, wiping the tears from your face with the back of his hand.

Your cheek still stung from where he slapped you, and it only made matters worse when you heard shuffling from your parent's room.

“B-but… I am ob-beying you,” you sniffled, voice cracking slightly as he kissed your face right where he struck you.

“Good,” he smiles, ceasing his hand in groping your cunt, “So that means you’ll let me make you feel good and you’llkeep quiet then, right?”

“Y-yes, Sunghoon,” you nodded, feeling him kiss your lips one last time before freeing you of his daunting shadow, only to stand up from the couch and tug you in whatever position he pleased.

And he handled your body as if you were weightless, but you knew that had more to do with his strength training than anything.

Situating you on your knees on the floor of the couch, he knelt behind you, caressing your waist while pressing his front against your ass.

Keeping all your clothes on, the only thing he did was slide both of your bottoms down, and you don’t think you ever felt more eager than you did once the cool room air hit your aching cunt.

And that’s when your stepbrother started sliding his burning red cock between your folds, trying his hardest not to spank you as that would only make more noise.

“You ready, baby?” He asked, making a makeshift ponytail of your hair, but before you could even answer, he was already sliding inside you all the way now.

And because you and he had sex so many times in the past, it’s like your walls were carved just for him.

No matter the circumstance, Sunghoon could always count on you being ready to take him in every which way he desired…

So, when you put up a little fight today, he made sure to remember it as he started rutting into you, keeping one hand firmly at your hips while the other one secured your head.

“Ohh…. mmm… ahhh,” you hummed, keeping your eyes shut completely as the faint sound of skin against skin filled the room.

His cock felt so good inside you, just like it always did… given the position, your cunt was angled a little different than what you were used to, but it helped him to fuck even deeper into you anyway.

“Feels good, baby?… Yea?… You just love taking your step-brother’s fat cock in your tight cunt, don’t you… you dirty little- nghh,” Sunghoon groaned breathlessly from behind you, pulling your hair back further now as he roughly pounded into you again and again.

“Your ass is so perfect, too,” he slurred, and all the dirty talk was making your pussy throb even more, with his greedy cock loving the sensation as well.

“Fuck, Hoonie,” you whimpered quietly, arching your back a bit so he could fuck you even deeper, when suddenly, you felt his grip release from your hair, causing your face to meet the couch cushions.

You could conveniently bury your face into the, whenever you felt like making a noise, letting all your naughty little sounds dissipate into the cotton.

He was bucking his hips behind you so fast and hard though now that even the wooden floorboards were starting to creak…

“Nghh…. Oh my g… ahh… fuck, baby,” you whined into the couch, but being so lost in the pleasure, it didn’t seem like Sunghoon cared to keep quiet anymore either.

He was grunting all loud like a madman now, and if it wasn’t for the air conditioner drowning out the squelching noises of skin-to-skin, you’re certain your parents would’ve caught you like this…

Your hearts pounded in unison as Sunghoon's hands continued to roam over your soft, supple body, tracing the curves of her hips before grabbing hold of the swells of your breasts. 

You couldn't help but let out a stifled moan as squeezed you in his grip, filling you with an intensity that was almost too much to bear.

Biting down on your wrist, you tried your hardest to keep yourself from crying out, but it wasn’t long before you felt your walls tightening around him, Bo your collective breaths growing more ragged as you approached the brink. 

“S-Sunghoon, I’m getting close,” you gasped, feeling something in your stomach tighten the faster your stepbrotherfucked his throbbing cock into you.

“S-so am I,” he stammered as the initially deep tone of his voice started to sound more desperate and vulnerable.

Sunghoon's eyes fluttered shut as he concentrated on the pleasure your soaking wet hole provided him with, digging his nails into your hips to contain all the energy within himself until it finally happened; with a silent scream of pleasure, you shuddered around his cock, making him lean forward to cover your mouth and conceal your moans, causing you to whine into his hand.

Swearing beneath your breath, he felt it was safe to remove his hand from your mouth now as your body arched off of the couch, and Sunghoon’s orgasm followed closely behind.

Not wanting to finish inside you, he pulled out as quickly as he could, jerking his slimy cock with the same hand he just covered your mouth with before cumming all over your back, using it as a landscape for his ivory release.

Sunghoon then pulled your shirt back over to cover you, and if you weren’t so tired and fucked out, the feeling of his sticky cum smearing under the cotton of your clothes would’ve made you cringe.

The two of you just lay there for a moment, panting and trembling with slick sheens of sweat decorating every corner of your collective bodies.

With a satisfied sigh, you looked down the hallway, noticing that your parent's door was already closed and that perhaps,the two of you missed it earlier given all the excitement.

You were already starting to feel the aches in your body creep up on you given how rough Sunghoon was being, but that all melted away once his lips connected with yours, humming into a gentle kiss.

“Let me help you to bed, sissy,” he whispered, helping you get up from the ground now.

He offered to carry you, but you insisted that you could walk on your own.

A few steps later, you were eventually in your bedroom with Sunghoon’s delicate hands getting to work on removing your shirt and wiping down your back.

Sliding a nightgown over your head, he gave you one last kiss goodnight before sweeping off to his own room now… but something in you told you this wasn’t the last you’d see of him tonight…

It was on nights like this that you missed Sunghoon most; despite how you two had already shared such intense intimacy with each other, you still craved his presence, and of course, he felt the same.

As you forced your eyes shut to hopefully get some sleep in, you comforted yourself with the fact that you never heard the soft click of the door latch from Sunghoon’s bedroom, letting you know that it’d only be a few minutes before his footsteps would echo through the hallway as he’d slip into bed beside you.

✎𓂃 Thanks for reading DAY 10's fic entry for my 2024 Kinktober Event !! Sorry I’m a day late to posting this (I had to process some issues in one of my friendships), but nonetheless, if you're interested, feel free to check out my main enhypen masterlist or my kinktober masterlist here !!

♱ PERM TAGLIST:

@squoxle, @nishiimuranights, @ashgonedash @yourmomscuntis2tighy (miss you), @wonbinisbabygurl @watamotee33, @addictedtohobi, @ot7sevenlvr

♱ KINKTOBER TAGLIST:

@pasteltheghost16 @fawnpeaks @melonvrs @mheretoreadff @skzfelixlove @inishij @yaorzu-blog @andromedawillburyyou @ramyeonzprincess @zaihypen @simjaeyunns @gardenwonnies @hynier @idontknowhowtomakeusernames @enhymeowz @minhosimthings @stormy1408 @crownj1min @jay-0n3s @gacktsa @leeknowinggg @d-dilemma @mrsjohnnysuh

[danthediamondminecart]

Hi! Took me awhile to think of these questions but here we go!

1. In the RBB Superheroes AU! Do some of the heroes recognize each other as civilians but not in their hero identities?

2. In your RBB Superheroes AU, do they recognize each other through their voices or is this the same kind of thing that miraculous has going on?

3. In your RBB TMA AU! I noticed your new video but I'm confused on a particular thing. What does Russo mean, "I see a man who makes it out alive, but it's no longer you?"

4. How is DJ and Russo's friendship in your RBB TMA AU? Like how does a hunt avatar and a eye avatar manage to be chill around each other?

5. In BLSMP, is there an alternative way for the battlers to leave the SMP or are they forced to do the whole, "Last man standing" kind of thing?

6. In BLSMP, if you lose all your lives and get well kicked out of the server, are they permanently dead or no?

7. Are there any hybrids aside from Booshot in the RBB Contestant?

8. If PinkLeaf dies again in a world with no respawn. Does he die or no? Considering he is dead himself.

9. Do you have any RBB ships, if so what are they?

10. In your RBB Pokemon AU, what are the specific types each gym leader and elite four use?

That's all for now!

Let's go, more questions!

Q1) Not really. Well, Kreek and Devoun know each other in their civilian identities, Leah and Ashley have interacted as part of their civilian jobs and maybe Kreek and Denis have chatted a few times, but they otherwise don't interact much outside of work - and the Hero Organisation much prefers it that way.

Q2) Some of this is done via Jack and Sanna's experimenting and limited glamour on the suits, some of it is that their features do change when they use their powers. For people like Devoun, his eyes change colours completely - from blue to green, others like Kreek remain having blue eyes, but they look much brighter when using his powers. Also, Kreek and Leah both get hair colour changes when using their powers. There is probably jokes passed around that they 'look' like the heroes, but a lot of people get that, not just them.

Q3) What Russo is saying is "You [Kreek] could've made it out of the supernatural side of reality with your humanity intact...but at the rate you're going, it's unlikely." After all, you often need to die to become a full avatar, don't you?

Q4) They were friends before they got claimed by their respective entities. When Russo became the Archivist, he explained the whole thing to DJ (Sabrina knew about it because she worked full time at the Foundation, but DJ isn't on the contract and really only assists when he can, so he didn’t know about the Entities.), so DJ doesn't care about his Eye allegiance. When DJ started going down the path of being a Hunter, Russo tried to stop him, which strained their relationship (Sabrina had been replaced by a Not-Them at this time), but after the real Sabrina was found and the Not-Them killed, they were able to repair their friendship.

Q5 + 6) No spoilers, you'll find out eventually :)

Q7) Yes! Many, in fact. Actually, just take my species tier list.

Flamingo is a flamingo hybrid (duh), Calixo is a shark hybrid, Jake is a tiger hybrid. There’s a sliding scale between the three of them of how much their hybrid DNA shows (Albert has strong flamingo traits, Calixo’s somewhere in the middle, and Jake’s tiger hybrid barely show except from fangs and oddly coloured body hair growing in weird places.)

NightFoxx and PrestonPlayz are…weird, species wise. Preston is a lava-creeper-human hybrid, so he has power over lava and fire as well as having creeper traits. Because creepers don’t exist in Robloxia, his Lava Elemental traits show through far more in Robloxia. NightFoxx is a hybrid between a Starborne and the Starborne equivalent of a fox - a Night Fox. Since starbornes are elementals, he’s an elemental-human hybrid. Even they don’t like explaining it.

Q8) Yes. See: Antithesis.

Q9) No, I've never been big on shipping at all to be honest. Technically I ship TeraBrite (DJ X Sabrina), but that's about it. (I've assumed you were asking after romantic headcanons specifically and answered accordingly.)

Q10) Some important context first: The Elite 4 (and Top Champion) in my Pokemon AU have achieved a rank called 'Champion Rank', earned for beating the Elite 4. Kreek and Tanqr have both earned the 'Top Champion' rank, as they've both beaten the Top Champion respectively. Because of this, the Elite 4 (and Top Champ) can use two types in their teams, but they must have a 'primary type' which is a type unused by any gym leaders.

On with the list, primary types are bolded. I'll include Tanqr as well:

Thinknoodles: Ground

OminousNebula: Ghost

MeganPlays: Bug

LeahAshe: Psychic

Calixo: Water

Jayingee: Rock (Flamingo: Flying)

Jackeryz: Ice

Bandites: Fighting

DenisDaily: Normal/Ground

iBella: Fairy/Psychic

PinkLeaf: Grass/Dragon

KreekCraft: Fire/Fighting

Tanqr: Dark/Ghost

Thanks for asking!

[k-dokja]

Summary: The needed communication with you after everything he had gone through in recent days.

Jake won't think about it.

Because if he does, he'll somehow manage to call upon your wrathful spirit and get an earful for getting into trouble again. He promised he wouldn't, he's breaking his promise again. If you don't want to put up with him anymore, he'd have zero grievance about it except the guilt he will harbour for the remainder of his life, however fleeting it will be.

It's one thing that he got involved with the gang business, he made his choice long ago and you respected that. You chose to stay with him in spite of his foolhardy crusade to save Sinu. He couldn't ask for more from you. But now, he's on the run again, Big Deal is scattered and arrested, and you haven't heard from him for days.

Jake won't think about it. If he dwelled on how you must be feeling any longer, he might do something stupid and run back like he's not a wanted man. Truthfully, he'd have followed that impulse had it not for the real potential that you'd be affected by his actions, too.

He saw your messages. All fifty-something of them. He read them all and thought about replying for days now, but every time he typed something, his fingers faltered and once again, he was at a loss for words. No excuse would suffice at this point and the longer he lets it go on, the harder it becomes to answer you.

Like it or not, he's on the fast track to win the title of 'Worst Boyfriend of the Year'. One would need an insurmountable level of stupidity to overtake him in this race at this point.

Even when he has the chance to contact you, with a new SIM card and a new phone, he can't do anything except stare stupidly at your phone number on his screen. Typed out, but he was doing nothing to initiate the call. You'd probably yell at him if you even thought to pick up a strange number.

He'd deserve all of it and you'd deserve better.

Jake sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. Better get this out of the way sooner than later, lest the wound fester and turn into blisters that will scar. He presses the call button, and dread pools at the bottom of his stomach.

A few rings pass by before a familiar voice speaks up from the other side. "Hello?"

He swallows. Not until he hears you that he realizes how much he missed you. You sound a bit more nasal than normal, he wonders if you're well. It's silly to even consider that your life is going on fine while he's in hiding, but it'd be arrogant to assume you're suffering because of him.

He won't know until he asks and it's a challenge to get there when his throat is this dry. Slowly, Jake says your name. It's more of a tentative plea than a greeting.

You go quiet. He doesn't need to see your face to know you must be upset at him. With a deep breath in, he braces for all of the scolding you will unleash upon him.

"...Are you safe?"

But it never comes. What he gets instead is your quiet concern, he doesn't know how to deal with that. It's far easier to pacify you when you're mad at him because he's used to it. Used to all of your irritation and your sigh and your eyes rolling. Not this, however. Not the fear of disappointing you even further.

He never quite knows what to do with it. "Yeah," he says, "I'm with an old friend of my dad... Lineman is also here. We're fine for the moment."

"Okay." You say. There is a silence after that makes him think you're trying to pick your next words. What he gets is a question. "Do you know how to get out of this?"

It's pragmatic and practical, he feels silly to think otherwise of your reaction. He almost wants to laugh, but he has to settle with a smile on his face, "We have a plan, a vague one, but it's a start. I don't know how long this will take but..."

Jake heaves out a long sigh. The truth isn't easy to admit even when you're this calm. "I can't guarantee anything, I'm sorry."

"When have your words ever meant anything?" You're the one who laughs and he can't help but wince. "Just try to stay alive, and if you do, let's talk when you're back."

He hates the sound of that. He hates how his entire body seizes when you say those words, but he has no choice but to agree with you. He has done enough damage as it is. "...All right." He adds, perhaps needlessly. "I'm sorry."

"I know you are," you say, "I'll have to go back to practice now, will you stay in touch?"

Jake won't deny that he's disappointed by how short-lived is your conversation, but he mentions nothing of it. "Yeah, same number," he says, "I'll let you know if something changed."

"Thanks," you reply, "please stay safe."

"I will," he swallows again, not knowing if he has the right to say these next few words, but he says them anyway, "...I love you."

It takes you a few seconds to answer. A few seconds too long. "Goodbye Jake," you say, "I hope I'll see you soon."

The call ends before he can say anything else.

Suddenly, his mouth feels bitter with regret.

[toracainz]

You are Steven's coworker. He is always sweet, respectful and you know for a fact that he couldn't hurt a fly. What is your reaction when he comes in one day, having a black eye, several band aids covering his face, trying to hide the small cuts, and his knuckles are also bruised?

(Marc or Jake took the body the night before and they were in a fight)

I debated so long about making this a fic for the response lol but I can’t get my thoughts straight right now so I’m just going to word vomit how I would probably react 😅

I might turn it into a fic later lol

If I was just standing there at work fiddling with the museum trinkets and Steven walked up looking absolutely wrecked I would immediately go into detective mode asking him a million questions…probably starting with “Oh my God, Steven! Are you okay? What happened?”

He’s absolutely deflect and come up with some entirely u believable excuse. Probably something “I had a fight with the ground and the ground won.” Or something like that, incredibly vague and not at all explaining how this absolutely sweet angle of a man could get in the condition he’s now in. Steven, understanbly, wouldn’t be going around telling people about his “condition”, but I would hope we would get close enough that he might consider sharing that.

Anyway, I would absolutely dote on him the rest of our shift. Checking up on him, offering to get him things (a drink, pain meds, lunch), offer to help with anything, asking if he needed help with his bandages. But I would absolutely want to know who hurt him. Not that all 5’3” of me who’s never been in a fight (and doesn’t want to) could do anything if I did know who did it. I would just want to let him know he had someone on his side. That whatever was going on he had a friend and support if he needed it.

Idk if this is what you were wanting for an answer, if it’s not I’m sorry 😅 I’ll get a fic together of this little scenario eventually. I’m not used to getting asks like this 😅

Thank you for sending me one 🥰 I feel like a real fanfic writer when I get asks about characters and scenarios 🥰

[soft-girl-musings]

20 Fanfic Questions

ty for the tag @virtie333, sorry for the delay!

How many works do you have on AO3?

7, so far!

2. What's your total AO3 words count?

17,707 (that number makes me unreasonably happy)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

currently: Moon Knight (2022) previously: The Arcana (dating sim, pre-Dorian butchering), The Hobbit franchise (I'd like to continue this one tbh!!) potentially: the Lokiverse (mans has been in too much), Spiderverse

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

An Unexpected Proposition (Kili x Fem!Reader - 43 kudos) Strawberry Cordial (Muriel x Apprentice OC - 37 kudos) Last Night (Jake Lockley x Fem!Reader - 26 kudos) Perks of Being a Wallflower (Jake Lockley x Plus Sized Fem!Reader - 17 kudos) Unfamiliar Territory (Muriel x Apprentice OC - 15 kudos)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

ABSOLUTELY, it makes me happy to do so. I love telling writers how I feel about their works (all good things i promise). and i love when folks take the leap and share their feedback.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

oh golly, technically Frankincense & Myrrh (The Arcana, Muriel x Apprentice OC). bc it's 1) unfinished and 2) will deal with a lot of the post-resurrection trauma Tamar (my Apprentice) will go through. it'll still be fluffy and more comfort than hurt if i ever get back into it, but man i really miss seeing her go through it.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

i'd have to say Perks of Being a Wallflower! no angst, just insecurity leading up to the ending lol

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I'm not popular enough to attract the haters

9. Do you write smut. If so what kind?

i don't <3

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

i feel like the closest thing to a crossover i'd attempt is something in the mcu, since every major event affects everything else in some way

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

great heavens i hope not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nah

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

not in the strictest sense of the word. but in the future, i plan on crediting the folks i share hcs and thots with, they've had a huge hand in shaping the world of my stories.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

the only thing that comes to mind is Matt Murdock x Claire Temple but i 1) have not finished Daredevil and 2) fully respect her for distancing herself from that disaster boy

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Frankincense & Myrrh - the Arcana fandom was spiraling when i entered in 2020, and while i love all the research and outlining i did for that story, it would take a lot for me to dive back into the game/lore to flesh out that story. Tamar Ufam you will always be famous to me.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i'd have to say dialogue and my attempts to make the stakes believable

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

(actually writing lol) in all seriousness, taking the time to string together the little story pearls i come up with. i burn myself out sometimes and end up not writing anything.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i enjoy seeing it! what i don't like is people going "lol no hate on my google translate spanish/whatever language" (mostly when the language is poorly applied) bc we not only have the technology/better websites to use, but real people online willing to assist with translating/contextualizing. if you're going to do it, give it its due diligence. fingers crossed i can follow my own directive on that.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Cats the Musical. I don't want to talk about it.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

published: tie between Last Night and Perks of Being A Wallflower. the first 2 fics i've published for my new fave Jake, and i see a lot of myself in Reader. these two will always be near and dear to my heart. unpublished: Relic to Relic (Loki x Fem!OC), outlining that story got me through my junior year of high school. while i'd need to rework some aspects of my OC's arc/abilities, i wouldn't mind writing for these two again.

tagging @cchickki @hon3yboy @mrs-lockley if you'd like to brag on yourselves!!

[fancy-a-dance-brigadier]

star trek ds9 for the ask thing!

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to ramble about my most beloved space show!!

Favourite character: Julian Bashir. He captivated me with his relentlessly irritating personality from day one. For real though, I just love how his character evolves throughout the show (season 7 not withstanding because what the hell was going on there), and I genuinely think he gets some of the best focus episodes (‘The Quickening’ I’m looking at you, that episode is a MASTERPIECE). But he’s funny and intense and strong and goofy, and above all he’s a consummate professional - there’s a lot of layers to him, which is what makes him so fascinating. Basically I’m a Bashir girlie for life. Love that noodle man.

Second favourite character: I’m genuinely having a hard time deciding between Sisko and Ezri, so I’ll choose both! Sisko is easily the best captain in all of Star Trek, and so much of that comes down to Avery Brooks’ masterful performance. There’s an endless amount of depth to his character, from his relationship to Jake to his hatred of the Maquis, from his position as Emissary to his passion for cooking and inventing and creating. Absolute king of my heart basically. As for Ezri, I just find her whole arc so compelling - she’s the host who was never meant to be a host, and she had the poor luck of hosting one of the most significant symbionts in Trill society. I do agree that the show definitely fumbles with her potential, and it’s a shame we only get one season of her, but I think she really does make the most of the time she’s given. Plus the nose scrunch. Nothing but respect for Ezri’s nose scrunch.

Least favourite character: The Female Founder. And it’s a shame, because DS9 has a great track record for its villains, but they really dropped the ball on her. She always felt like she slowed the story down, and her role in Odo’s story just got repetitive. I think they did improve her at the end of season 7 when she was dying, but a few good episodes don’t really make up for how frustrating I found her throughout the rest of the show.

The character I’m most like: Uhh Jake I guess? He likes writing, I like writing. He likes Ben Sisko, I like Ben Sisko. Uh yeah that’s all I’ve got 😂

Favourite pairing: Siskoshir, but I’m sure you saw that coming! It’s about the professional respect they have for each other, it’s about the tenderness, it’s about their shared willingness to break the rules for a good cause, it’s about that one scene in ‘Past Tense’ when Ben gets Julian breakfast. Nothing but love for them always and forever.

Least favourite pairing: Kira/Dukat. I don’t think I need to explain why.

Favourite moment: This is a cruel question because how am I supposed to pick just one moment?? From seven seasons of brilliant television?? I’m supposed to choose between the scenes with the Prophets from ‘Emissary’ and Benny’s breakdown at the end of ‘Far Beyond the Stars’? I’m supposed to choose between Julian confronting Winn in ‘Life Support’ and Kira speaking to Kai Opaka about her relationship to violence in ‘Battle Lines’? I’m supposed to choose between the ‘Rejoined’ kiss and Odo’s love confession in ‘Heart of Stone’? Cruelty, it’s cruelty I say.

Rating out of 10: 11/10. It’s perfect television. I’ve never enjoyed binge watching things, but let me tell you I spent 50% of my life last year binging DS9 for the first time and it’s become one of those beautiful experiences in my fannish life that I yearn to recapture. Sometimes a silly space show really can cling to your heart and never let go.

[na-ta-sh-aa]

I think I've run out of adjectives I know to describe the beauty of this chapter. This was too wonderful, I loved it from start to finish. I liked how the relationship between her and Jake strengthened a lot in this chapter and how they started talking about more personal things too.

“Jake was the last to move for the door, and you quickly grabbed his hand, pulling him back. He turned to stare at you, surprise turning into a question.”

Ahhh, I liked the way Jake reacted in surprise when she took his hand. Just like I loved the way he cared not so much about what Cyclone could do to him but what he could do to her.

“Now we just need to find someone to go with you.” “I’ll do it.”

Oooh Jake immediately seized the opportunity presented to him!

“But you knew that Jake could be trusted. He had shown you the kind of man he was capable of being, and you trusted him enough by this point to know you would be safe.”

I love that she feels safe with him and finally has more trust around him. And I find it very beautiful that she got to know a version of Jake that she had never seen before.

“You kept it?”“Of course I kept it,”

Jake was surprised that she kept the horse carved, so sweet🥹

“The two of you camped out under the stars of the wilderness, Jake making sure you were plenty warm and comfortable in the back of the cart before settling down on the blanket he would set by the fire.”

I've said it before but I'll say it again, he is a true gentleman and the way he treats her, respects her and cares for her shows it, and I’m madly in love with it!💞

“Honey girl, I already have to sit next to you during the day. I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands to myself if I didn’t have this time to cool down.”

🫠🫠

“We’re not goin’ to leave a friend to walk through hell alone,”“You’re a good man, Jake Seresin.”

Learning more about Jake's story was really beautiful and interesting. Knowing how he tries to help his sister and nephew in every way and how he didn't leave Bradley alone warmed my heart. He's a really good man. Even if at first sight others fear him or have bad opinions of him, you just need to get to know him better to find out what kind of man he is.

“I’m fairly certain that couple thinks we’re married,” “Would that be so bad?”

I literally screamed!

“Do you ever think about getting married?”

The fact that he was so tired in the morning as if he hadn't slept makes me think of Jake tossing and turning in bed thinking about marriage.

“Not really. Never thought I’d like anyone enough to want to spend the rest of my life with them. Used to laugh at the idea of ever finding someone who could make me want to settle down.”

Until now! I bet he thought about it all night.

“Your blood boiled when she batted her eyes at him with a coy smile.”

Ahh jealous Scout!

“Ticket says this is my cabin too.”

Ooh I love and live for these kind of unexpected events!

“Only of something happening to you, sweet girl.”

Jake😭

“Tell me to stop,” he said softly, hand skimming the ends of your nightdress. “Tell me to stop, and I swear I will, y/n.”“Don’t stop,”

Okay, but this scene was really hot. The intensity, the tension, their chemistry was something spectacular and made the scene so real. And his dirty talk all the time? ooh Jake knew exactly what he was doing, lucky Scout!

“Look at me, sugar. Wanna see your face as you fall apart for me. Fuck, I’m gonna keep you so full. Gonna keep you all nice and round while I take care of you. Gonna take care of my gorgeous, little wifey.”

“his hips stuttering against the mattress as he let out a whimper into your core. You ground your hips down into him as you rode out your high, and Jake grunted as his hips stilled, shaking with the strain.”

Omg🫠🫠

I love their relationship so much. I am too happy that they have become closer and known more intimately, in every sense! These two have really entered my heart, I love their story madly! I thank the day I discovered your blog because all your works are masterpieces and I can't do without them anymore!💌✨

Don't Hang'em Til Noon: Chapter Six

Don't Hange'm Til Noon: Chapter Six

Pairing: Jake “Hangman” Seresin x Reader

Summary: Jake "Hangman" Seresin is a notorious leader within the Dagger posse of the old western territories of the United States. You, a recently orphaned socialite from the eastern seaboard, find yourself swept off to live with your older brother who has set down roots in said western territory. Determined to to make the best of your situation, what will you do when said outlaw sets his sights on you?

Warnings: Swearing, Smut (oral, f receiving), Jake Seresin. I think that's it?

Word Count: 6.4k (I'm so sorry, oh my god)

A/N: I have no words for this one. I warned y'all the train scene was gonna be something else. Also, shoutout to @im-just-ken for taking the time to do research for me and putting up with informing me about all of the different aspects of the Victorian Age!! You're the best!! As always, reboots, comments and likes are greatly appreciated!! 18+ ONLY!! Find me on AO3 under sailor_aviator!

Series Masterlist

The sky was overcast and the distant rumble of thunder sounded off in the distance. Autumn was beginning to give way to winter, and a new routine had settled in over the ranch in the three weeks since Jake had started working there.

“What are you doing here?” you had asked him with wide eyes. His smirk had widened at your flustered appearance. Your mind raced back to the events of the night before and you gave your tomatoes a run for their money with how red your cheeks must have been.

“Didn’t your brother tell you?” Jake asked, quirking an eyebrow at your brother. “I work here.”

“No, you don’t,” you gaped, glancing wildly back and forth between the two men. “Since when?”

“As of yesterday afternoon,” Benjamin sighed, casting you a sideways glance.

“But, why?”

“You made it pretty clear yesterday morning that you were only interested in men who work for a living,” he explained, cocking his head to the side with a bemused look in your direction.

“I didn’t mean here!” you spluttered.

“Well, Benji here was kind enough to offer me a job,” Jake nodded at the other man. “Isn’t that right, Benjamin?”

Benjamin let out a sigh that sounded something akin to “lovesick fools” as he turned to stalk off towards the barn. You stared after him helplessly before Jake cleared his throat, gaining your attention. His smirk was gone, replaced by a much more serious look as he gazed at you.

“I’m not going to cause any trouble,” he stated, shaking his head when you gave him a dubious look. “I mean it. I’m here to work and earn my livin’ like a man should. I give you my word.”

You studied him for a moment. His green eyes held a look of sincerity and a desperation for you to believe him. You sighed. “Alright, Jake. I’m taking you at your word.”

“Excellent,” he beamed down at you before giving you a stern look. “Now go on and get now. I’m tryin’ to work and you’re distracting me.”

You chuckled lightly, giving him a small smile. Jake’s stern expression dropped, a look of wonder replacing it as he stared at you. A moment passed before he broke out in a grin and turned his attention back towards the fence.

Now, an air of easiness had settled between the two of you as life on the ranch continued. Jake worked hard, and he never complained about what was asked of him, even going above and beyond on a couple of occasions. You had even found him napping in the barn one day after a night where the coyotes had been particularly active, and you had allowed the poor man to catch up on his rest in thanks.

You were on your knees in the garden, digging up the onions you had planted a while ago, when you heard the sound of a horse making its way up the path to your home. Looking up, you saw U.S. Marshal Simpson making his way to you. You wiped the sweat from your brow, stumbling to your feet despite the numbness that had paralyzed your limbs from sitting on them for too long. Beau Simpson smiled at you as he dismounted, walking over to meet you by the fence to your garden.

“Marshal Simpson,” you greeted politely.

“Afternoon, Scout,” he said. “Please, call my Beau.”

“Of course,” you smiled. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Well, I was hopin’ you could help me out with something.”

“And what is that?”

He looked out to the empty pasture before glancing at you from the corner of his eye. “Was hoping you could tell me where I might find Jake Seresin.”

Your blood ran cold. You knew he was probably out with the others, moving the cattle in from the far pasture, but you weren’t about to tell Beau Simpson that.

“And why would you think that, Beau?”

He fixed you with a look that said he knew you knew why he’d think that, but he played along. “Well, amongst other things, I heard he managed to get himself a job here against your brother’s better judgement.”

“You shouldn’t gossip, Beau. It’s the Devil’s pastime.”

He let out a laugh at that one. “Well, from what I hear, it’s hardly gossip, Scout, but alright. You seen him around?”

“Can’t say that I have,” you responded cooly, picking at the dirt underneath your fingernails. It wasn’t a lie, exactly. You had told him the truth, you reasoned with yourself. You hadn’t seen Jake that day. Beau was quiet for a moment, studying you thoughtfully before letting out a long sigh.

“You should be careful, Scout,” he began, pushing up off the railing. “It won’t do you any good to get tangled up with someone who’s due a hanging. You might end up caught in the rope yourself, if you aren’t careful.”

You didn’t respond. He tipped his hat to you before moving towards his horse. You watched as he mounted and made his way back towards town. You stared after him long after he disappeared from sight before walking slowly back into the house. You went upstairs to wash the dirt from your face and hands before setting out to make dinner. It was a couple of hours before the four ranch hands made their way through the back door, laughing and smiling the entire way. You scowled at the group of men.

“What do you all think you’re doing?” you snapped. Four pairs of wide, shocked eyes turned to look at you, the laughter and chatter stopping immediately. You glared down at the floor where their boots had left muddy shoe prints on the hardwood. They followed your gaze before slowly looking back up at you with sheepish grins.

“Sorry, Scout,” Levi apologize, already moving back towards the door. “We’ll go get washed up outside.”

The others murmured their agreement and filed out after him. Jake was the last to move for the door, and you quickly grabbed his hand, pulling him back. He turned to stare at you, surprise turning into a question.

“I need to talk to you,” you said. He smiled down at you with a wicked gleam in his eyes.

“Oh yeah, honey girl?” he drawled. “What about?”

“Marshal Simpson came by today.”

“Cyclone?” Jake asked, taken aback. “What did he want?”

You dropped his hand, and moved towards the stove where you had left dinner unattended momentarily. “Came by to ask if I had seen you.”

“Oh?” he questioned, leaning up against the wall by the door, watching you with an unreadable expression on his face. You hummed, nodding.

“Don’t worry, I told him I didn’t know where you were.”

He seemed surprised at that, pushing off from the wall and coming to stand by your side. “What?”

“I told him I hadn’t seen you. It wasn’t a lie, technically,” You rushed out. Jake stared at you incredulously before frowning.

“You’re not telling me something,” he said, narrowing his eyes at you. You glanced at him before looking back down at the pot of soup you were stirring. “What else did he say to you?”

You sighed and recounted what Beau had said. Jake swore, turning and running a hand through his hair. “I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about,” you offered in a huff. Jake whirled back to look at you, worry lines crinkling his brow.

“Nothing to worry about?” he laughed humorlessly. “Scout, don’t you know a threat when you hear one?”

“I don’t see why he would be threatening me,” you argued, hands on your hips. “I’ve done nothing wrong.”

“It doesn’t matter if you’ve done something or not, sweetheart,” he groaned out. “He knows I work here, and he knows what to go after now.”

“I don’t understand,” you frowned. “You weren’t this worried when I mentioned him before. Why are you now? What changed?”

Jake stared at you for a moment. He moved to say something, but the door swung open as the other ranch hands filed in.

“You better go get washed up quick, Hangman,” Phillip laughed, clapping Jake on the back before taking a seat at the table. “Might not be any food left for you when you get back.”

Jake gave a half-hearted smile to the other man before giving you one last look and walking out the back door.

The next morning, business continued on as usual. You had just hung the laundry out to dry when you heard the front door creak open with a thud as it hit the wall.

“Scout!”

You walked into the parlor where Benjamin stood, grinning wide as he searched for you. His smile grew impossibly wider as his eyes finally landed on you. He raised his hand up to reveal an envelope, and he shook it in excitement.

“Benji, wha-”

“It’s a letter from Aunt Jo!” he cried excitedly. You let out a happy cry of your own as you rushed forward. Your Aunt Josephine had been your mother’s older sister, and you had spent many days running around in her orchard growing up. She was a kind woman, and she had helped to fill the void of your mother’s passing. It had been hard to leave her behind.

“Have you opened it?” You were practically vibrating from excitement. Benjamin shook his head.

“No, I wanted to read it with you.”

“Well, go on!” you laughed, gesturing for him to open it. He did so, eyes scanning the paper quickly.

“She wants us to come for a visit,” he smiled, looking up at you. Your grin matched his own as you hopped excitedly.

“What’s going on here?”

The both of you turned to see Jake standing in the doorway with an amused glint in his eyes as he watched the two of you giggle like school children. You felt heat rise to your cheeks.

“Our Aunt Josephine wrote to us,” you explained in a hurry. “She wants us to come visit.”

“Yeah?” Jake grinned at your enthusiasm. “When?”

“Says she wants us to come up for Christmas,” Benjamin frowned, scanning the letter over. Your heart jumped at the idea of seeing a white Christmas again. You thought it was one of the many things you had given up when you moved out west to Maverick. Benjamin lowered the letter with a grim expression. “I can’t go.”

“What?” you cried, looking over at him. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” he said slowly, “that I can’t go. There’s too much work to be done here on the ranch, and I can’t take the weeks off from the firm.”

“Oh,” you said dejectedly. “Well, we’ll have to write back to Aunt Jo to tell her we’ll come at another time, then.”

“No, Scout,” Benjamin said firmly. “Just because I can’t go, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. I know how much you miss it there, and the trip will mean so much more to you than it will me, anyway. No, I insist. You’re going.”

“But, Benji-”

“I’ve already made up my mind,” he said, offering you a smile. “Now we just need to find someone to go with you. Ah, but Hondo and Joel aren’t do back for weeks now. Maybe I could get Tom to-”

“I’ll do it.”

Both of you turned to look at Jake. His eyes darted between the two of you as you gaped at him.

“What?” Benjamin questioned. Jake cleared his throat and stood up a little straighter.

“I’ll go with her,” he said firmly. Your eyes darted to Benjamin who was already looking at you. He cocked his head as if to say that he was okay with it if you were. You bit your lip, mulling your options over. You worried about the implications that might arise at having a man who wasn’t family show up with you in Baltimore. But you knew that Jake could be trusted. He had shown you the kind of man he was capable of being, and you trusted him enough by this point to know you would be safe.

“Yes,” you said finally. “Alright, it’ll be the two of us.”

Two days later you were adding the final items to your bag for your journey. Benjamin had already sent a reply back to your Aunt Josephine explaining the circumstances, but had told her you were eagerly preparing for your trip. You had just placed your last skirt in your bag when something caught your eye. You glanced up to see the wooden horse still standing proudly on your end table. You chewed on your bottom lip, slowly walking over to grab the figurine. You smoothed over the back of it before turning it over in your hand to stare at the initials that were carved into its belly.

“Scout? The cart is ready, and Benjamin wanted me to-”

You looked up to see Jake standing in your doorway. His eyes were focused on the wooden statue in your hand before they slowly traveled up to look into your eyes.

“You kept it?”

“Of course I kept it,” you scowled at him. “Why wouldn’t I?”

He shrugged, a smile tugging on the corners of his lips. “You were just so mad at me then. I didn’t think you’d care enough to keep it.”

“Well,” you mumbled, trying to come up with something, anything to weasel your way out of the conversation. “I did.”

Jake studied you for a moment before smiling. “You almost done packin’? Your brother’s waiting downstairs to send us off.”

“Yes,” you breathed, thankful for the out he had offered you. “You go on ahead. I’ll be down in just a minute.”

He nodded before turning and walking off. You let out a sigh, looking back down at the wooden horse. You walked back towards the foot of your bed where your bag lay, and gently placed it on top before closing the clutch and heading downstairs.

The first couple of days passed without incident. Benjamin had wished you to a safe and pleasant journey, watching you as Jake drove the cart down the street. The two of you camped out under the stars of the wilderness, Jake making sure you were plenty warm and comfortable in the back of the cart before settling down on the blanket he would set by the fire.

“You don’t have to sleep on the ground,” you told him on the third night. He had looked up to where you hung over the side of the cart to look at him. “There’s more than enough room to fit the both of us comfortably.”

Jake had let out a low laugh before giving you a look that made your core clench. “Honey girl, I already have to sit next to you during the day. I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands to myself if I didn’t have this time to cool down.”

You blushed at his words and had quickly rolled over to try and get some sleep.

Jake was a surprisingly good cook, and an even better shot. The two of you survived off the bread and produce you had purchased from the general store as well as the rabbits Jake managed to shoot during your camp-outs. By the fifth day, you had run out of polite conversation topics, and the two of you drifted towards more personal ones.

“Do you have any siblings?” you asked him that afternoon. Jake quirked an eyebrow at you in amusement. “What?”

“You wanna know if I have any siblings?”

“You already know about Benjamin,” you pointed out. “I think it’s only fair if I know about any siblings you have.”

“Alright, Scout,” he hummed with a smile. “If you must know, I have an older sister.”

“What’s her name?”

“Sarah,” he smiled. “She’s about two years older than me, and she has a son named Billy who’s a little terror of a kid.”

He smiled down at you, and you returned the gesture. He turned his head back to the road and frowned. “Her husband died just after Billy was born. So, I’ve been tryin’ to help her out where I can. She works in town as a seamstress, but the hours are long, and the pay is shit.”

“What about your parents?” you asked, and he gave you a wry smile.

“They died in the scarlet fever epidemic that swept through Maverick years back. The same one that took out Rooster’s mama and daddy and Bob’s pops. It was a real mess there for a while, but Mav and Penny took us all in, gave us a roof over our heads and put food in our bellies. I don’t think any of us were really much of the same after that, though.”

“Jake,” your heart broke for him. “That’s awful. I’m so sorry.”

“Ain’t nothin’ for you to be sorry ‘bout, sweet girl. We get along just fine now. Jus’ wish my sister didn’t have to work so damn hard all the time, is all. Don’t wanna see her work herself into an early grave.”

You hesitated. “Is that why you do what you do? Steal, I mean.”

Jake didn’t answer for a moment. “That’s one reason. I’d do anything for my sister and that kid of hers. The money and treasures I get from doin’ all those jobs mostly goes to help her out.”

“And the other reason?” you asked. Jake pursed his lips, contemplating his next words.

“Rooster was real torn up about his parents. I, at least, had Sarah. Bradley? He didn’t have anyone. Think something died in him the day he lost the both of’em. He started acting out when we got older, and before long he was out robbin’ banks and all sorts of other shit. I think a part of him just wanted to hurt the world the same way it hurt him, and he decided that that meant he had to take. Take what isn’t his, and keep taking before the world takes from him again.”

“And what about you? Why did you join him? Why did any of you?”

“We’re not goin’ to leave a friend to walk through hell alone,” he stated with a shrug of his shoulders. You studied his profile for a moment.

“You’re a good man, Jake Seresin.”

You saw the tips of his ears flush a bright crimson. He cleared his throat and turned to look at you with a playful glare.

“Alright, you’re turn,” he smirked. “Which of my friends do you like the most? And if you say Javy, I’m dumping you on the side of the road.”

Steam billowed as a train whistle sounded on the platform. Jake was handing your luggage over to the conductor as you surveyed the station. It was still the same as when you had arrived months ago, but you felt that you yourself had changed. You supposed you had.

“Are you ready? Guy says we’re leavin’ in a couple of minutes,” Jake said as he sidled up to you, placing a gentle arm around your shoulder.

“Yes, I’m ready,” you smiled at him, allowing him to steer you towards the train car. The conductor reached out a hand to you, and you took it gratefully. You felt your cheeks flush as Jake laid his hands gently on your hips, lifting you onto the step as the conductor pulled you up. Jake followed after you, and the two of you quickly found seats near the middle of the car. You sat by the window as Jake sat across from you just as the train began to lurch forward. Jake jumped at the sudden movement, shoulders and face tense.

“Are you alright?” You asked him, reaching out to rest your hand on top of his. He glanced at you, then took a deep breath to relax.

“Jus’ never been on one of these before,” he answered, offering you a nervous smile. You returned the smile, patting his hand before pulling away.

“Yes, I suppose it can be a tad nerve-wrecking when you’re not used to it.”

“You travel a lot?” he asked you, watching as you turned to look out the window.

You shrugged. “Not so much anymore. I used to take trips with my friends up to New York every now and then.”

“You must miss it,” he murmured, eyes never leaving you. You looked at him.

“I miss them.”

Jake frowned, his turn to look out the window at the landscape that rushed past you. “Well, you’ll see’em soon enough.”

You weren’t sure how to respond, but before you could, and older woman and her husband joined you in your seats. Jake was polite, but you could sense something was off with him as his smile never quite reached his eyes. You retired for the evening, wishing the older couple a pleasant evening as Jake rose to walk you to your sleeping quarters. You stopped in front of the door to your cabin, looking up at Jake with a coy smile.

“I’m fairly certain that couple thinks we’re married,” you chuckled. Jake’s face remained stoic as he watched you.

“Would that be so bad?” he asked softly, voice barely above a whisper. Your smile dropped as your eyes widened up at him.

“What?”

Jake watched you for another half second before shaking his head with a sigh.

“Nothing,” he muttered, knocking his fist on the doorframe twice before turning to head to his own cabin. “Goodnight, Scout.”

You watched him as he closed his door behind him before turning into your own cabin, shutting the door behind you.

The next morning you found yourself only hours away from St.Louis. You dressed slowly before walking over to Jake’s cabin. When he didn’t answer your knock, you decided to see if he had gone on ahead. You found him minutes later in the dining car, nursing a cup of coffee. He looked tired, bags heavy under his eyes as he looked out the window. A couple of women at the table next to him were casting him barely concealed glances as they giggled amongst each other. You marched down the aisle and sat in the seat across from him. He started at your entry, but relaxed when he realized it was you.

“You’re up early this morning,” you commented. He hummed at you, taking another sip from his coffee. You pressed on. “Are you usually such an early riser?”

“Yeah, I suppose so,” he grumbled, and you pursed your lips.

“Is something the matter?” you asked. He glanced at you.

“Do you ever think about getting married?”

The question caught you off guard, and you balked before fixing him with a curious look.

“Sometimes,” you admitted slowly. “I suppose most girls do. It’s something we’re raised to do, after all.”

“But do you want to?” he asked, eyes twinkling.

“Yes,” you stated, shifting in your seat. “I do. Someday.”

“And what about the groom? Who is it you want to spend the rest of your life with?”

You scowled at him. “Why are you suddenly asking me this?”

Jake just stared at you, waiting for you to continue. You huffed. “I suppose I’ve never really given it too much thought. I knew I would have to get married one day, and I assumed that one day I might fall in love with someone. There were several young men pushed for me to choose, but I suppose none of them ever felt right.”

“What about you?” you asked suddenly. “Have you ever thought about marriage?”

“Me?” Jake laughed, leaning back in his seat. “Not really. Never thought I’d like anyone enough to want to spend the rest of my life with them. Used to laugh at the idea of ever finding someone who could make me want to settle down.”

“And now?”

Jake’s expression remained amused, but there was a hint of an emotion behind his eyes that, try as you might, you couldn’t place. Jake glanced out the window and made to stand up. “Looks like we’re here.”

The train ride from St.Louis to Baltimore started off much of the same, except this time you were seated next to a group of young women who openly gawked and giggled over the handsome man across from you. You felt a rush of irritation as one dropped her hand fan in the aisle. Jake reached down to grab it for her, staring up at her with a polite smile.

“I think you dropped this,” he offered as she took it. Your blood boiled when she batted her eyes at him with a coy smile.

“Thank you, handsome,” she grinned as her friends broke out into another round of giggles. Jake cleared his throat with a wince as he leaned back into his seat. You stood up abruptly, and Jake was left scrambling to his feet.

“I’m tired,” you announced, making a pointed effort to not look at the girls. “I’m going to bed.”

“Sounds like a good idea,” Jake agreed, following down the aisle after you. Neither of you said a word to the other as you made your way towards your cabin for the evening. Stopping in front of the door, you turned to look at Jake.

“This is me,” you said. Jake looked at the number on the cabin and then down at the ticket in his hand.

“That can’t be right,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair.

“What?” you frowned. Jake looked up at you and then back down to his ticket before letting out a sigh.

“Ticket says this is my cabin too.”

“What?” you shrieked, snatching the ticket from his hand. “Give me that.”

You stared down at the black ink, willing the information to change. You glanced at Jake who was still watching you, waiting for you to come to terms with the situation.

“What do you want to do?” he asked finally.

“Well, we’ll just have to find the conductor and get this mess sorted out.”

“Alright,” he nodded. “I’ll go try and find him. You stay here.”

A half hour passed before Jake slunk back to the cabin looking defeated. He offered you an apologetic smile. “I couldn’t find him.”

You chewed on your bottom lip before letting out a heavy sigh.

“I suppose it can’t be helped,” you muttered, turning to open the door. “Come on, then.”

“What?” He said, eyes growing wide.

“Look,” you gritted out as you stepped through the door, “we can be adults about this. It’s one night.”

“But-”

“Would you rather sleep out here?” You argued. Jake didn’t respond. “That’s what I thought. Now come on.”

Jake followed you into the cabin silently, closing the door behind him. You moved to open your luggage that had been placed inside when you boarded, taking out your nightdress. You turned to see Jake still staring at you. The two of you stood in the tiny space facing each other for a moment.

“I need to change,” you whispered, swallowing thickly.

“Yeah, I’ll just,” Jake stuttered, moving to turn.

“Don’t look,” you threw in for good measure, earning a nervous chuckle from the man in front of you. You turned around, quickly undressing before throwing your nightdress on. You turned back around to see Jake still facing the door.

“Okay,” you breathed. “I’m decent.”

Jake turned around to face you, and you heard his breath catch in his throat. He slowly looked you up and down before meeting your gaze again. “My turn.”

You watched as Jake removed his shirt. You blushed when he pushed his pants down to reveal the white, knee-length undergarments he wore. You took in the smattering of blond hair that covered his broad chest, almost blending in with the gold of his skin. Jake cleared his throat and glanced at the bed.

“How do you wanna,” he trailed off. You looked at the bed and made your decision. You brushed past him, moving to lay down. You laid back, glancing up at him shyly. Jake watched you in a reverie, breaths coming out quick and stuttered as he looked down at you. He turned to dim the gas lamp, casting the room in darkness save for the moonlight that filtered through the window. Silently, slowly, he laid down in the bed next to you.

The two of you laid in silence for almost an hour, Jake’s back to you as you fidgeted with your fingers.

“Jake?” you called out softly. “Are you still awake?”

“Yes.”

You rolled onto your side, facing his back. “You never answered my question.”

Jake rolled over so that you two were now facing each other. “What question is that, pretty girl?”

“Back at the ranch, when I told you what Beau said, I asked you why you were suddenly so worried about him when you weren’t before.”

Jake didn’t say anything for a moment. “Do you know why they call him ‘Cyclone?’”

You shook your head.

“They call him that because when he sets his mind on a job, he comes in with a fury, leaving nothing behind, just like a tropical storm.”

“Oh,” you breathed.

“Yeah,” Jake agreed, reaching up to cup your cheek.

“Are you scared?” you asked him quietly, and he gave you a wry smile.

“Only of something happening to you, sweet girl.”

You reached up to run your fingertips over his cheek, running them down until they brushed over his lips. He parted them slightly, looking at you with eyes ablaze. Before you could think on it, you surged forward, planting your lips on his. Jake quickly deepened the kiss, bringing his other hand up to your hip to pull you close. He grabbed the flesh of your thigh as he lifted your leg up to drape over his waist. You parted your lips at the movement, and he took advantage of it, licking into your mouth with a desperation that left your head dizzy. You moaned into his mouth, pushing yourself against him as he slowly guided you up into a sitting position.

You grabbed at any part of him that you could reach, whining when he broke the kiss. He chuckled as you chased his lips with your own, but fixed you with a serious look in his eye.

“Tell me to stop,” he said softly, hand skimming the ends of your nightdress. “Tell me to stop, and I swear I will, y/n.”

“Don’t stop,” you responded breathlessly. Jake leaned in to grant you another kiss before pulling back to lift your dress over your head. The cool air of the night washed over you, and you suddenly felt exposed as he drank in your naked form. You moved to cover yourself, but he grabbed your arms, gently leaning you back down onto the bed as he hovered over you.

“Don’t,” he said firmly, the green of his eyes swallowed by the blacks of his pupils. “I want to look at you.”

You watched him as he drank in your form, hands softly gliding down to rest on your hips. A small smile played at the edge of his lips.

“You look so pretty for me, honey girl,” he hummed. Your breath caught in your throat as he parted your legs. Leaning back to take all of you in, his eyes blazed with want as he stared down at your most intimate part. He surged forward, capturing your lips in an unexpected kiss before trailing hot, open-mouthed kisses down the column of your neck. He sucked a bruising kiss onto the base of your neck, you gasped as you felt the hard, covered length of him push against your dripping core. One of his hands reached up to grasp your breast as his mouth encased around one of your nipples. You mewled, thoughtlessly pushing your chest up into his warm mouth. He pulled off of your hardening peak with a low chuckle.

“You gotta be quiet, pretty girl,” he smirked down at you, fingers still toying with the nipple that hadn’t just been in his mouth. “Don’t want to disturb the other passengers, do we?”

He didn’t give you a chance to answer before his mouth was attached back to you. You squirmed underneath him, desperate for more of the mind-numbing pleasure you knew he could give you. Jake was in no hurry, though. He took his time lapping at your sensitive bud before switching his attention to the other. Your head fell back in frustration as your hands moved up to tug on his blond strands.

“Jake, please” you moaned. Jake gave you a playful glare before giving a particularly hard pinch to your breast that had you crying out.

“Greedy girl,” he rumbled, leaning up to kiss you, nipping at your bottom lip. “You’ll take what I give you, understand?”

You nodded your head desperately, and Jake hummed in approval. Mercifully, he trailed his lips down your body, giving fleeting sucks and nips to your nipples before moving further down. Your breath hitched as he shifted down the bed, face level with the junction of your legs. He teased open-mouthed kisses up and down your thighs, never touching you where you wanted him most, and you began to squirm yet again. Jake moved to wrap his arms around your thighs, caging them in his hold so that you couldn’t move. He nuzzled up into your mound before making eye contact with you.

“Been thinkin’ about this for weeks, honey girl,” he murmured, breath fanning over you and making you cry out. “Been thinkin’ about how sweet you tasted that night in the alley. Fucked my hand at the thought about all those little noises you made jus’ for me as I made you fall apart on my fingers. Fuck, you squeezed me so tight. Imagined what it would be like to have my cock buried in this pretty pussy instead of my fingers.”

“Jake!” you cried out at his words. You let out another cry as he snaked a finger around to run gently run through your folds.

“Look at you, darlin’. I’ve barely touched you and you’re already soaked. You’re practically drippin’ on the bed for me. The thought of takin’ my fat cock inside of you makin’ you this wet? Jesus, I see you clenching. This greedy, little cunt is practically beggin’ for me.”

“Jakey, please,” you sobbed, feeling the tears start to prickle behind your eyes. Jake continued his torture, finger now grazing lightly over your clit, and your hips started to buck up into him before he pushed them back down.

“Uh, uh, sweetheart,” he chided, casting you a light glare. “You take what I give you, remember?”

You whined as he began to draw tiny figure eights on your sensitive nub.

“That’s it, darlin’. You just lie back and take it. Let Jakey make you feel good, yeah?” he drawled, sinking a finger into you. He let out a low groan as you clenched tightly around the digit. “Fuck, pretty girl. Love the way you grip me like that. My pretty pussy is just beggin’ for me to fill her up, huh?”

You felt yourself clench at the thought, and he chuckled, adding a second finger.

“Yeah, she likes the sound of that. Loves the idea of me pumpin’ into you until I give you everythin’ I have to give.”

You cried out when he pulled out of you, but his fingers were quickly replaced with the feel of his tongue diving into you. You raised your hand to bite your fist in an attempt to keep quiet. He thrust his fingers back into you as his mouth moved to nurse on your clit, sending you headfirst towards your orgasm.

“Been thinkin’ about this since I tasted you the first time, honey girl. Couldn’t wait to get my mouth on you and get my fix. Never gonna get my fix, though. Taste too good for me to ever have my fill o’ you,” he rasped. You watched his hips rut into the mattress as he feasted on you, your slick coating his lips as he nipped at your bud. Your legs began to shake as he continued to eat you out like a man starved.

“Jakey,” you cried out as his fingers hit that spongy spot inside of you that made you see stars.

“Yeah, honey? Did I find your special spot again? Fuck, you’re squeezin’ me so tight. Can’t wait to sink my cock into you and fill you up with my cum. You want that? You want me to fill you up pretty girl?” he asked you breathlessly, the pace of his hips quickening against the mattress. “That’s okay, you don’t gotta answer me. Your cunt is doin’ all the talkin’ for you. She’s weepin’ for me to pump my load into you, get you nice and swollen with my baby.”

The tears flowed freely down your cheeks now. You flung a hand over your face, but Jake was having none of it.

“Look at me, sugar. Wanna see your face as you fall apart for me. Fuck, I’m gonna keep you so full. Gonna keep you all nice and round while I take care of you. Gonna take care of my gorgeous, little wifey.”

You cried out as your vision went white, his words flinging you over the edge. You watched his own eyes widen as you came apart, his hips stuttering against the mattress as he let out a whimper into your core. You ground your hips down into him as you rode out your high, and Jake grunted as his hips stilled, shaking with the strain.

You slowly came back to yourself, a sheen of sweat covering your body as Jake pressed soft, gentle kisses up the length of your body before pressing reaching up to stroke your cheek affectionately. You met his gaze, his green eyes watching you. Your chest rose quickly as you fought to control your breathing, and Jake gave you a small smile before placing a chaste kiss to your lips.

“Sleep now, honey girl,” he whispered as he dragged the blanket over you. You reached out for him, and he pulled you into his chest with a slight chuckle and one last kiss to the top of your head.

[parkers-gal]

masterlist

requests | closed to complete current requests <3

last updated | aug 5th, 2021

do not repost my work anywhere !! respect this please. | fics are not ordered in any particular way. these headers are mine so pls don’t use/take them

tom holland

insomnia - reader can’t get to sleep; tom finds out why

driving in the rain - fluffy dinner date and rainy drive back home

workouts and warmth - when all tom wants is some after-workout cuddles

from across the living room - announcing your engagement to your families

the one - you want to move out and get your own place as a couple, but tom doesn’t. nikki talks to him. 

anything for the twins - tom massages reader’s boobies during her period

moms, makeouts, and mishaps - nikki walks in during your makeout sesh

simple acts of intimacy - a fluffy 3.1k words worth of blurbs

silver surprises - the reader surprises tom at a premiere

twenty questions - questions ensue after tom & reader get stuck in an elevator

my gut - spinoff of twenty questions with claustrophobic!reader (tw/ anxiety + attacks)

stealth mode - tom & reader scaring each other

unicorns vs pegasuses - tom shuts the reader up by kissing them

a good story - tom meets reader at a meet & greet — friendships blossom to lovers

deal breaker - tom wants kids, but the reader does not

his lap - reader asks for help in overcoming an insecurity; tom misreads the situation

pool day - pool day w/ tom + the boys

hot - the reader picks a certain song that reminds her of tom - the boys go wild

grounded by rocks - tom talks about you in an interview for cherry

your hands - when all he wants is a simple head massage

late flights - in which tom takes too much time with the fans

nobody wanted to - where only one person makes it out alive

way more than 50 - the hollands trick the reader into thinking they did something they weren’t supposed to 

why [ pt ii ] - sweet cupcakes, and a not so sweet breakup

what looks suspicious - nikki doesn’t exactly approve of tom dating the reader

something sweet - reader drops off small gifts while tom’s on set

he remembers - when tom finds the letter

missed you - reuniting w/tom after four long months

soft gangsta - tom tries to dress edgy; the reader is unconvinced

the shoe game - reader & tom play the shoe game at their wedding

too much - when the reader has a rough time with work, tom comforts them

losing grip [ pt ii ] - a losing battle between the reader and a hereditary disease causes heartbreak

your captain america - protective!tom holland of young reader (age gap)

sexy genius - reader is a fan of (and meets) jake gyllenhaal

teddy bear cuddles - tom wears an oversized hoodie

nonsense - the boys think the reader is meddling with tom’s work

circles before yourself - rule #2 - osterfield!reader gets caught with tom

seventeen times - when the reader is having a hard time in lock down, tom tries to help (TW // depression)

pixie dust hair - tom assures insecure!reader that the pixie haircut looks good <3

a few more months - reader passes out during a run; tw // excessive exercising

tiktok au’s

body ody ody - tom gets a little jealous over a few social media comments 

sweats in the supermarket - getting tom hard when he wears sweats

put your records on - trying not to kiss each other first

mood killer - saying dirty things into tom’s ear

say it back - pranking tom by not saying ily back to him

two different ways - tom choking the reader to get two different reactions 

brutal - doing the “did you mean to post this?” trend on tom 

worst thirty minutes of my life - playing a drinking game with tom to see who gives into cuddles first

my girl’s cuddles - crawling into tom’s lap 

even - buying hot leggings & taping tom’s reaction 

goofball - a silly way to reveal reader’s pregnancy to tom 

end the debate - “i found out why my boobs are small” trend

slam the car door - doing the car door prank on tom 

water bottle wars - the boys ask you and tom questions about each other. wrong answers result in sprayed water 

get you back real good - you & the boys prank tom after watching a scary movie 

peachy - sighing / moaning in front of tom playing video games to get his reaction

my princess - tom does a tiktok where he guesses all your answers to everyday questions

dad!tom

needles and needs - when scarlet has to get shots, you realize she may not be the only one that needs comforting

all my girls - scarlet meets her baby sister for the first time (dad!tom)

everything i love about u - tom is afraid baby red might hate him for leaving home too much

a little extra help - stepdad!tom being the best dad to your daughter

through the tears - pregnant!reader goes into labour, and baby holland meets the family

first feed - tom watches you breastfeed for the first time

warmth from the love - baby holland’s first Christmas

first words - baby holland speaks for the first time

breaking the internet - when your pregnancy announcement crashes multiple apps/websites (pregnant!reader)

breaking the internet... again - when baby holland breaks the internet

boyfriends and brunch - when jade brings home her boyfriend (aged!up)

big sister + how are babies made - telling scarlet about the baby on the way (pregnant!reader)

too many kids - the reader’s dad has some commentary about the twins

mumma’s girl - tom gets jealous when scarlet isn’t a daddy’s girl

angels - a little skin to skin time with his best girl

family man - after a nasty breakup, tom finds out you had his child

cheesy uncles - telling paddy he’s going to be an uncle

ag!reader (more to come !!)

y’all really get nasty - tom and the fans discuss ag!reader’s songs

my favorite things - ag!reader performs in front of the mcu cast at the grammy’s

34 + 35 - the boys react to reader’s new song(s)

34 + 35 remix - the boys reacting to the remix

his remedy - the boys react to positions deluxe

neglected - AG!reader breaks up w tom because of their job; tom searches for answers

low-key wants him - reader talks about how much nonna (+ her fam) loves tom

see u soon - reader interacts with tom while on stage for the swt

a few spilled secrets - AG!reader performs on jimmy fallon’s show.. tom and her confess a few secrets

for the first time - when the reader breaks down crying while singing about her ex, tom is there to comfort her

dance with me, rain on me - reader has a hard time on set, tom to the rescue

every tomorrow - the first album release night after your breakup

here we go again - introducing tom (+ the boys) to your celebrity friends

condoms or safety nets - the boys react to AG!reader’s song “safety net”

we’re not engaged - AG!reader announcing to the world why they no longer have a fiance... (fluffy)

the late late show - AG!reader & tom do spill your guts or fill your guts

pain from pleasure - dad!tom goes through a birth simulator — controlled by the reader

never have i ever - tom & the reader play a game on the late late show

fluffy hair - ag!reader has a zoom interview with zach sang. tom makes an appearance

fighting off the haters - ag!reader and older!tom holland (age gap) attend an award show after going public

run your hands thru my hair - tom reacts to ag!reader’s song “my hair”

stick to acting - tom tries to make a beat for ag!reader

practically twins - reader meets sebastian & anthony at comic con

damn lucky - black!reader wears her hair naturally during an interview

what a piece - reader talks about tom related songs & tattoos

flip it - tom talks about reader in an interview

at the door - older!reader & tom fight off haters

a headcannon of ag!reader being a marvel cast member

a headcannon of tom & the reader attending the avengers endgame premiere

styles!reader (more to come !!)

bathroom kisses - makeout sessions with tom and styles!reader in the bathroom

yeah, he is - tom holland x styles!reader meet the styles family; protective older brother harry makes an appearance

unparalleled love - older brother harry styles makes a speech at reader’s wedding

grilled - date night for tom & styles!reader is a bit difficult with two kids; older brother!harry to the rescue

baby showers and brothers - dad!tom & styles!reader are going to be parents

potential boyfriend - tom has a crush on the reader when they first meet

ts!reader (more to come!!)

trust me - tom & the reader defend her after nikki doesn’t approve

your london boy - tom & co. + the world reacts to “london boy”

boy of my dreams - tom being proud of the reader for winning a grammy

rapper!tom

tom records your sounds during sex for his music (hc)

tom talks about you in an interview

concepts: one , two , three

professor!tom

my pretty girl - tom gets jealous when reader gets many valentines

other reader tropes

cherry - reader is a screenwriter for tom’s upcoming movie

no shouting - singer!reader needs some help after paparazzis are too much (based on a video of tom)

pregnancy belly - actress!reader has to wear a pregnancy belly for her role, and the boys tease tom about when it’ll be real

we march - actress!reader being a huge feminist

passions & pediatricians - pediatrician-to-be!reader meets tom

politics - reader’s granpa is joe biden (requested) and tom meets him

extra support - psychiatrist!reader helps tom on the set of cherry

you made it big - tom holland x actress!reader at the after party

partition - the boys react to famous!reader singing partition

senorita - singer!reader makes a music video with shawn, who’s tom’s new best friend

miniseries 

boomerang: one , two , three , four [completed]

peter parker

making amends

➢ enemies to lovers ; college!peter x super soldier!reader ; 30k words ; sorta slow burn

cheeky guy, favorite thighs - college!peter doing a tik tok challenge — between the reader’s thighs [tik tok au]

a little nicer - doing the prank on peter (”you could’ve been a little nicer to me today”)

start searching - first make out sessions with our best boy :)

hidden hickeys - the avengers think innocence of peter, until they’re proven wrong

the team - part two of hidden hickeys; reader meets the avengers

all of you - late night talks about your future with peter :’)

like you wouldn’t believe - reader tells mj about her & peter’s awesome sex

slip from my hands - roommate!peter comforts the reader after a nightmare

i’d wait for her - college!peter parker needs to come to terms with you and your boyfriend

shut up and kiss me - soft make out sessions with peter :)

all the good things in the world, and i get you - insecure!reader needs a little reassuring 

modern chivalry - peter being a gentleman on the subway

eggnog and mistletoe - peter helps you love the holidays

the force awakens? it sleeps - a little extra comfort & care from our favorite baby boyfriend 

a prince - wonder woman!reader meets spider-man (& avengers) in a mission

steve rogers fics - peter finds you reading fanfiction abt steve rogers

fanboy!peter

fanboys and bracelets - fanboy!peter parker goes to famous!singer!reader’s meet and greet

fanboys and phone numbers - fanboy!peter parker continuation 

showing around - fanboy!peter gets VIP access; some dancing ensues

stark!reader + avengers!reader

if you knew feelings - the avengers want you & peter to break up

sleeping - peter misinterprets a few important questions

the may to your ben - college!best friend!peter parker x stark!reader fluff

race ya - peter confesses his feelings for rogers!reader after a mission — on comms

frat bathrooms - stark!reader joins the avengers where she sees college!peter, the boy she slept with at a frat party

rainy days - reader doesn’t like rainy days, a certain wall-climber changes their mind

already got her - jealous!peter makes a public confession

flustered!peter

a nervous one - flustered!peter parker sees cheerleader!reader in her uniform

one day soon - flustered!peter parker x affectionate!reader

all better - flustered!peter parker does some lab flirting with reader

dad!peter + pregnant!reader

unplanned  [ part ii ] - reader gets pregnant... breaks up with peter to avoid it all

burrito wraps - reader worries that baby parker might be cold

a name to remember - latine!reader & peter give their girl a special name

you’re magic - a certain wall crawler hears two heartbeats

sgt. bucky barnes

first cuddles - bucky asks to cuddle for the first time

harry holland

golden light, the love of my life - the boys tease harry —on a live video— for being whipped

it won’t f^cking open - harry lends a helping hand

how much i - those three magical words are exchanged for the first time

cuddly koala moments - time the reader just needed harry’s warmth

anything for hands - the reader cuts harry’s hair on instagram live

your other best friend - the reader is sam’s new friend, but harry thinks they like tom instead

you’re my anchor - harry has an anxiety attack, but the reader knows what to do

what’s his [ pt ii ] - when everything thinks the reader should date tom instead, harry snaps

whipped fries - harry brags about the reader winning the pub quiz for them

tell me, show me - the reader makes harry flustered by playing w/the strings from his sweatpants

keep your cool - tom setting u up with his brother // nikki being wary

ag!reader

you’re such a dream to me — ag!reader writes r.e.m. about harry

harry styles

intoxicating - soft bubbles baths with long haired!harry 

frayed braids - reader braids long haired!harry’s hair

others:

harrison osterfield

not anymore - when harrison comes back from filming, he’s determed to win the reader’s heart

irreversible - when relationships fall apart, people fall apart. (infidelity)

circles before yourselves - rule #1  - harrison x osterfield!reader (sister) when brothers talk, bad things begin

think of her - harrison asks your family for their blessing [holland!sister]

steve harrington

together not never - steve discovers the reader is pregnant

[luxshine]

A bit of Supernatural ranting, as I am trying to organize my ideas about my Moon Knight meta, because this complain is a complain I will make about a... somewhat similar situation in both fandoms.

I REALLY don't like it when a character gets a specific name/treatment/calling from the narrative, and then it gets given/shared to someone else who def. didn't do the same groundwork as the first character.

I want my characters to EARN their titles, you know.

For example: I HATE Michael!Adam in Supernatural. (Which is also why I simply screen all Michael/Adam fics and once again, I am so happy people tag correctly).

Nothing against Jake Abel, who did a great job acting both characters, but for me Michael!Adam is a spit on Jensen's face and Dean's character. Because we had a whole season and a half where Dean was FINALLY the center of the mytharc, because he was Michael's Sword, Michael's True Vessel, the Righteous Man who could stop the Apocalypse.

And he didn't say yes because he KNEW the consequences of it, he knew people would die, and he knew it was wrong. The whole season 5, more than the asking "Will Sam say yes to Lucifer?" the REAL question was "Will Dean say yes to Michael?" Only for that rug to be pulled from under Dean's feet by going LOL, nope! Who cares about true vessels, here we have a perfectly good replacement who only has HALF the DNA needed for the True Vessel thing, but will do in a pinch and in any case, it's not going to be really important because Cas will first Molotov Michael and then it all will be solved by the old and tried method of Dean getting the shit beat out of him by someone he loves while they're possessed, come back to their senses by listening to Dean's pain, and uhm... oh, yeah, we throw Sam, Lucifer, Michael and Adam into a pit.

And then ZERO interest in Adam or Michael until we finally get a small taste of Michael!Dean in the form of Alternative Universe Michael... but who is NOT our Michael, not the Michael who never got why Dean would say no, why angels would rebel FOR Dean (not just Cas, there was Anna too, and, in the end, Gabriel) So we get or Michale back.. only for him to have bonded off camera with Adam, and now they're quite chummy and people ship them and...

Adam didn't earn that.

Sorry, we saw him for TWO whole episodes, one of them where he was a ghoul pretending to be Adam, and the second where he was willing to throw half of humanity to the pit because the angels told him to. I don't buy that kid teaching Micheal ANY respect for humanity at all.

So yeah, those episodes are like nails on chalkboard for me because it's just a reminder of yet another Dean arc that the powers that be just didn't want to let actually BE an arc. Like... pretty much every single one.

(And it's telling, now that I think of aborted arcs? That the only one that everyone involved fought for? Was the Dean/Cas relationship. THAT was dropped very often too, trying to make it less important, trying to make it go away. But the writers, some directors, Jensen and Misha? didn't give up and gave us 15x18. For that? I am grateful. I just wish other, non-romantic arcs, had been fought for the same)

[abbatoirablaze]

Good Girl's Club, Chapter 30

Word count: 2k

Warnings: angst, mentions of pregnancy, mentions of abortion.

“I don’t know what I’m gonna do…” she told the girls as she looked around the living room. A few of them shrugged, not really invested in the conversation of MIT. Em wasn’t going to college, and both Maddie and Britt had already decided that they were going to do their first semester partially online to manage part time jobs. But Nia and now Cami had opted to let her know that they’d both planned on attending Georgetown to stay close to Steve and Bucky, “you really aren’t coming with me, Cami?”

She noticed Cami thumbing her dad’s dog tags and she shook her head. Sasha’s anger heightened the more her friend spoke, “Steve and I talked about it after Thanksgiving last month, an-“

“I can’t do it without you,” Sasha muttered sadly, trying to coax her friend into giving in as she bit her bottom lip, “y-you’re my best friend. That’s been our dream since like the fourth grade, Cam.”

Sasha was met with an objecting chorus of four other women. Cami laughed, “you guys know what she means…we were always planning on going to MIT together…she doesn’t love me any more or less than the rest of you. Sash you’ll be fine…I’ll come and visit all the time. Me and Steve.”

“No, you won’t…none of you will…”

“You’re acting really strange, Sash…are you sure you’re, okay?”

Sasha glared at Britt, “what are you talking about? I just found out that I’m going to MIT all alone…of course I’m not okay.”

“Phones exist,” Cami groaned, looking at the other girls, “you’re acting like we’re going to abandon you. We can facetime, call, text, all kinds-”

“Might as well just forget about me. It’s not the same as actually having you right next to me, going through the same things there,” she whimpered, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes, “you guys ar-“

“Is it your time of the month?” Maddie asked suddenly, cutting her friend off with a giggle, “you know, I just got synced up with you guys again, and if Sasha is the one that throws that all off, I’m gonna be pissed.”

The girls looked at Sasha expectantly, but her mouth dropped as she’d had a realization. Her eyes went wide, “i-I don’t remember when my last time was…guys…when was yours?”

“Sash…”

Her breathing got shallow as she looked around the room nervously to the girls. Slowly, one by one each of their eyes went wide as they came to the same conclusion, “guys…I don’t remember when my last period was….i-it was definitely before Halloween though…”

“Shit.”

“I think I’m late.”

That was the only confirmation Em needed to grab Sasha’s hand and pull her away from the living room and into her old room, as she began digging through her dresser. The rest of the girls followed after.

“Em what are you doing?”

But their answer came soon enough when Em held out a box to Sasha, “Now. Do it.”

It wasn’t a question. It was an order. The girls eyed both Em and Sasha, but it was Sasha who spoke up, “Em…why do you have a pregnancy test?”

“Don’t worry,” she sighed, pushing her friend towards the bathroom across the hall with a shake of her head, “I’m not pregnant.”

All of the girls caught on to the fact that she sounded almost sad about her answer, but they said nothing, as Sasha took the box and went into the bathroom. The girls waited at the door nervously for her to finish, all talking about their respective relationships.

“So…are you and Jake-“

“Lee,” she muttered, biting her lip, trying to hide the smile that was fighting to come out, “a-after Thanksgiving, we kind of sorted through everything once and for all…he made love to me.”

“Lee did what?”

Em looked to Sasha who had opened the door. The stick was on the counter, and the now had to play the waiting game, “Lee…we made love…he set it all on the table for me…told me that he couldn’t stand me dating another man. So, we made up. H-he wore a condom…so there’s no real need for the test…and I got my period a few days ago so…”

“Is that why your room looks almost untouched?”

“Em nodded happily, “I uh…I moved back into his room right after and broke up with Jake Taylor that night…called him right before Lee and I had sex. So, I guess I’m officially with Lee now.”

“You waited almost a month to tell us?”

“Then why’s he still acting all mopey?”

“I-we didn’t want to tell you guys because I’m still seventeen,” Em admitted, biting her lip, “it-it’s still illegal.”

“Well so is my dad fucking Sasha, but here we are,” Britt giggled, “Em I’m so happy for you…you got your man.”

“You little ho,” Maddie giggled, nudging Em “and here I was thinking I was the only one getting some daddy dicking in secret.”

The girls’ eyes widened at Maddie admission that she and Jake were having sex again, “MADS!”

“The PI panned out…” she admitted gleefully, biting her bottom lip, “when Jake confronted Trin about how she was still cheating on him, she admitted that she only just found out she was pregnant when she caught me and Jake…which means Jake couldn’t have been the father because she wasn’t home the whole month she conceived. Trin moved out this morning…and well…Jake and I have been talking about moving in together after the divorce is finalized.”

“Damn,” Britt giggled, “Jensen moves on quick.”

“How long has it been?” Sasha asked nervously. The girls remembered the situation they were in, and Cami pulled out her phone.

“Ready to look?”

“I can’t…” Sasha replied, wringing her hands, “s-someone look for me.”

Nia was quick to head into the bathroom, ready to grab the stick.

“Wait?” Britt asked, stopping everyone in their tracks, “Sasha…if you are…are you going to keep it?”

“What?”

“If my dad knocked you up…are you going to keep the baby?”

The girls suddenly looked between Britt and Sasha, realizing the gravity of the situation. Nia backed out of the bathroom.

While all of them were seeing one another’s dads, they hadn’t fully considered the big ‘what if,’ of what if one of them had gotten pregnant. But now that it was a very real possibility, they were forced to look at it head on.

“I-I don’t know,” Sasha admitted slowly, “I-I don’t think I’m really ready to be a mom…I’m eighteen, Britt. It’s pretty crazy to even think about…right?”

“But if you are…”

“Can we just look at the test first?” Sasha asked anxiously, glaring at Britt. Britt nodded, and Sasha turned back into the bathroom to grab the test, “Shit…”

“What is it?”

“What does it say?”

She held out the test to her friends and looked at Britt. One word glared back at the girls.

PREGNANT

The room was divided.

But not in the way one might think.

Nia and Sasha were in one corner.

Britt and Cami in the other.

And Em, was sitting on the floor, lip warbling as she stared at the two groups, while Maddie reassured her that Lee and she would have a baby eventually. Honestly, it was probably the best kind of reaction any of them could have hoped for.

“BRITT STOP!”

“SHE WANTS TO FUCKING KILL MY UNBORN SIBLING!” Britt yelled, fighting against Cami, “SHE WANTS TO ABORT IT, CAM!”

Britt was crying into Nia’s arms as the test laid on the floor, untouched when they muttered the dreaded word aloud.

Em had excused herself quickly, Maddie following her out as she cried into her friend’s chest in the hall.

“Well, you can’t go around, trying to punch the pregnant one,” Cami yelled at her, “That’s fucked up, Britt.”

“She tries to kill my unborn sibling, I punch a ho. That’s how it works!”

The girls had moved to the living room, but even that space felt too small. Too claustrophobic. Half of the girls were a mess of tears and snot, all of them with their own reasons behind it. While the other half just tried to make sure that the situation was handled.

“You have to tell him.”

Sasha’s eyes shot to Britts, “no…that’s not even an option, Britt. I can’-”

“You tell him, or I will.”

Sasha’s jaw clenched, “don’t you fucking dare, Britt.”

“My dad deserves to know that you’re carrying his child, Sasha,” Britt said defensively, “he deserves to be part of, and make the choice too.”

“He wouldn’t have to carry it. That’s such a fucked-up thing to say, Britt. Andy doesn’t have to deal with the things that I will!” Sasha muttered, “Wouldn’t have his body change. He stuck his dick in me and came…that was his choice. I told him to use a condom.”

Britt looked away from her, tears threatening to spill again.

Yeah right,” Cami muttered sarcastically, “I heard that joke at Thanksgiving…Boston Cream Pie…”

Sasha paled, “it was a joke, Cam.”

“Steve was so upset when he heard it,” Cami sighed, shaking her head, “it took everything in him not to turn and beat the shit out of Andy at the dining room table…but he didn’t want to be like that…he didn’t want to be a hypocrite…he wanted to be respectful of your relationship…do you know how upset he was when he realized you were fucking Andy before you turned eighteen?”

“I don’t need some bullshit stepmom talk, Cami,” Sasha growled, narrowing her eyes at her friend, “I don’t care if my dad’s sticking his dick in you…but don’t go pretending that you’re better than me…or that you’re my mom.”

“That’s not what I’m trying to do, Sa-“

“Save it,” she hissed, cutting her friend off. She sniffled and Nia rubbed her back, giving her a sympathetic look, “I don’t need to hear it.”

“Nia can you please talk to he-“

“I think she’s right,” Nia said quickly, cutting Cami off, “We’re all seventeen and eighteen years old, and what we’re doing…it’s ludicrous. They’ve all got us acting like housewives for them. Making Thanksgiving dinner. Doing family vacations. Getting pregnant. Cami, you always talked about going to MIT with Sasha, and now suddenly you’re okay with Georgetown…Britt, you’re really going to do school at night and online just so you can line your schedule up with my dad’s? Our biggest worries should be picking out our dorm’s curtains or which laptop to get or making our class schedules for the Fall semester. Sasha is making the right choice by opting to get an abortion. And I don’t think she should have to tell Andy about it.”

Britt’s jaw dropped, “are you fucking kidding me, right now, Nia?”

“What about Em, huh?” Maddie asked, “she doesn’t want to go to college. She wants to marry Lee and become a mom…are you saying she’s too young for that?”

“Em is still only seventeen,” she replied quickly, “she might change her mind.”

Maddie glared at her, “she knows what she wants, Ni.”

“What if I got pregnant?” Cami asked suddenly, looking at Sasha, “how would you feel if your dad knocked me up, Sash?”

“It’s not the same, Cami…”

“It is,” she replied, pointing at Britt, “you fucked her dad. Without condoms. You’re making these sexually explicit jokes about being filled with his cum at a holiday dinner with all of us…and then when he manages to knock you up, suddenly you’re unsure about sex. Suddenly you’re unsure about what you want. Bullshit like that is what makes them question what we want. It makes them think that we’re just some kids that they probably shouldn’t have fucked with to begin with.”

“Cami, stop!” Nia demanded, seeing Sasha’s tears start up again.

“NO!” Cami growled, looking to her, “you can’t tell me what to think or feel, Nia. If you want to defend this, go ahead. But Britt wouldn’t do something like that. I wouldn’t do something like that. Fuck Em had a pregnancy test on the ready. She wants to be a mom. And even though Maddie is sitting beside you two right now, I know she wouldn’t do something like that. She was consoling Em because she’s not pregnant and wants to be. She’d probably be just as over the moon as Em would if Jake knocked her up.”

“Stop.”

“You have one week to figure out what you’re gonna do,” Britt warned, from her spot on the couch, “and if you don’t tell my dad by next week during the Christmas party…I will.”

Chapter 31

Tag list: @cjand10

[callsignspark]

Jordan: queen of making me blush with kind words 💕 the pining is unreal!! I'm two seconds away from smooshing them together like two Barbie dolls and making them kiss (jk their first kiss isn't for a while. or is it? 👀)

i love them interrogating annabeth!! and her rationale for why bradley liked mary’s bathing suit “he kept staring at her….he liked her butt” and then TWIRL BOBBY!! i love how much she loves bob, it’s so cute! poor jake tho - I love little kids, providing all the details except for the one thing you're actually looking for. though her outing Bradley's staring at her ass, good work Annie. (poor Jake indeed. he does end up almost puking after spinning. has to lay down on the floor and take deep breaths. Annie? completely fine and trying to get another adult to spin her.)

this is such a good line - Callie and Nat trying to get Annie to tell them things

this sounds so cool! i know it was mentioned previously but i also think it’s really cool she has a masters degree! she’s so smart and capable in her work life, now she’s just gotta get as good of a handle on her personal life 🥺 - she's so incredible when it comes to professional stuff! she's so smart! you're definitely right about the personal life stuff! things will start to get better in part six. (it's going to messy but it'll be progress.)

i agree with mary, but also think it’s funny that he’s so blunt. it’s like he’s trying to get their easy banter and relationship back, but just jumps the gun a littleeeee too much - bradley: quick, brain! what can I say that won't make things awkward? "you think they're fucking?" that did not help!! (he's been trying to respect the fact that she clearly wants space, but he's also tired of her avoiding him. he misses his friend.)

awwww honey! i do get how based on this behavior why bradley says they should forget what happened? like he’s trying and it just breaks my heart for both of them? - it makes sense! he's having a normal, reasonable reaction! the problem here is that their friends (bless their hearts) are trying to force things instead of letting them happen at their own pace. (the blame here is like 40% Mary, 30% Bradley, 30% Dagger Squad)

i always liked that she called him bradley - like we talked about earlier, she calls all of them by their real names most of the time. even at work she’ll usually go with Rank Last Name. there’s very few people that she consistently uses their call sign, and it’s only because those people prefer their call signs. she's spent a lot of time around naval aviators (from retired pilots, to newbies, to active duty with several tours under their belt) and she witnessed firsthand in Missouri and Florida how this job can consume people and suddenly they only feel like they can be their call sign and now themselves. so she purposefully calls everyone that she’s close it’s by their real name(s). including Bradley. but she also calls him that because she really likes his name.

oh sweet girl! i get it being so scary, this totally breaks my heart. like he’s just so pretty and kind and smart and he wants me?? - I cried writing this entire part and while editing. absolutely gonna kick the ass of every man that's been mean to her.

‘we can have just one night or we can have one whole life’ i also wonder if they weren’t interrupted and did have sex would mary have tried to brush it off and keep it as a one time thing in order to save her feelings? despite what’s occasionally popular in fics, i don’t really see bradley as a big one night stand guy and don’t really see him letting that happen? - (first of all, I love that song <3) and I agree that he's not a one night stand kind of guy. at least not any more, when he was younger he would occasionally hook up but he definitely wasn't a different woman every night kinda guy. as for the third point, if they weren't interrupted and did have sex, what would have happened? that's a create question! and I'm actually planning to write a special one-shot "different ending" where we see what would happen in that scenario!

the line ‘i have never been able to forget my body’ reminds me of this ee cummings poem ‘i like my body when it is with your body’ and then the line at the end ‘and possibly i like the thrill of under me you so quite new’ this entire part is so beautiful but also sad - I just read that poem and I love it so much, especially the last line. it's just so beautifully them. this part was hard to write, emotionally. it's very raw. but I'm very proud of how the final draft came out. (ps. Jordan knows this but if anyone else actually reads this, I wrote the rough draft of this section at 4AM one night and cried the entire time.)

i’ve told you how much i love this line before, but like just imagining how cozy she’ll be in it and like as weird as it is to say, bradley would be a little proud that she’s wearing his sweatshirt? and like despite what they’re going through she knows he’d lend her one? and then that means she has to give it back to him? and it smells like her ☺️ oh i’m so excited for his pov in chapter 6! - Bradley loves her in his clothes!! (even this time, when things are rough between them - it makes his heart race a little bit to see his callsign on her! that's his girl!) and she knows that Bradley is a good man and would help her out if he could, no matter if they're fighting or not. she does have to give it back to him! (she does in part six! where we see things from his perspective! y'all it's about to get messy!)

i totally feel for both them and see both sides because her behavior wasn’t exactly the best re avoiding him but also she was really embarrassed and so shocked, but like she didn’t give him any indication that she was like into it in the following weeks?? my heart hurts - my heart hurts too, they're both not handling this the best way and could be in such a better spot if they had just talked to each other. but alas, both of them are not the best about letting themselves open up to other. (don't worry they get better about it.)

this reminds me of that scene in little women when laurie unties amy’s apron in her little art studio? you perfectly described it, like it’s mixed with sadness and longing - how dare you tell me this reminds you of one of my favorite sad scenes in one of my favorite movies. (affectionate) (thank you so much for that comparison)

oh this is gonna be TROUBLE (in the best possible way) like the two of them? at a club on valentine’s day?? mary in a cute dress?? bradley pinning? mary pinning? - I've said it before and I'll say it again, but chapter six is just one word: messy

Mar[r]y Me - part five

pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x Mariella “M&M” Vertucci (fem!OC)

summary: A love story told through friendship, laughter, and food.

series warnings: 18+ minors DNI, discussion of insecurities, difficult family relationships, discussions of food and alcohol use, discussions of body image, conversations on what it’s like to be a fat woman trying to date in today’s society, warnings to be added as needed

word count: 5.3k

previous part | series masterlist | main masterlist

note: happy Friday! we're really getting into the meat of the story in this one! thank you for all the love on this series! can't wait to hear everyone's thoughts on this one!

part five - buffalo chicken dip

“What do you mean you’re not coming?!”

Mary yanks the phone away from her ear; Kristina’s voice is much shriller than she expected it to be when declining the invite.

“Kris, I don’t care about football. I don’t even know who’s playing! Why would I go to a Super Bowl party?”

“Uhh, to drink wine, watch the funny commercials and eat buffalo chicken dip? Why else?”

“That’s not a good enough rea- hang on, I’m putting you on speaker so I can keep folding laundry.” She puts her phone on the end table. “That’s not a good enough reason to come. Who's making the buffalo chicken dip anyway?”

“You! Like you did for Friendsgiving!”

“Kris…” She sighs. “I really don’t want to come. I’m sorry; it’s nothing against you guys. I’ve just been in a weird mood lately, and I won’t be much fun. I don’t want to ruin it for everyone.”

“Are either of you ever going to tell anyone what happened that night?”

Mary freezes, a half-folded towel tucked under her chin. “Nothing happened! I don’t know how many times that has to be said before someone finally believes me!”

Nothing happened, my ass. Kristina rolls her eyes, remembering the desperate measures the Dagger Squad had taken to try and figure out what happened between Mary and Bradley. The previous Friday, a group had even gone as far as interrogating Annabeth. At the same time, Harvard, Fritz, and Omaha had invited Bradley to join a “boys' night out.” It was a failed attempt to get information out of him, figuring he would be the easier of the two to break.

“Come on, Annie. Think really hard! What happened the day you, Aunt Mary, and Rooster went to the beach?” Danielle questions from the couch.

“We played in the sand and the water! Aunt Mary didn’t like when I got her wet, but she didn’t get mad. And Rooster liked her swimsuit. Twirl, Bobby!”

Bob spins around, looking a bit green in the gills after their twenty-fifth consecutive rotation. “I gotta tap out, or I’m going to throw up.” He hands Annie off to Jake.

Mickey pushes a water bottle into his hands, giving him a pep talk while Reuben rubs his shoulders. The three of them looking like a poor parody of a boxing team between rounds.

“How do you know he liked her swimsuit?” Coyote asks, feeling a bit ridiculous that they’re relying on the memory of an almost five-year-old to find out what happened over three weeks prior. But it was their last resort. The two adults involved had given them nothing.

“Spin, Jake!”

“Answer our questions first. Then we can spin as much as you want.”

Annabeth’s eyes go wide. “As much as I want?”

“Jake, you may not want to-”

“As much as you want.” He nods solemnly. They’re going to get this information, one way or another, even if it means that someone pukes. He can’t stand another week of being front row to the droopy Rooster and sad M&M avoiding each other show. “How do you know Rooster liked Mary’s swimsuit?”

“He kept staring at her.” She giggles before adding, “He liked her butt.”

It sends titters through the ten adults assembled, silence falling over the group at Jake’s glare. 'What else happened?”

“We went to the grocery store, and Rooster says I get his sunglasses when I’m bigger! We had beach meal and ice cream sundaes and watched Cars!”

“What else did you guys do?” Callie questions, her and Natasha sending encouraging smiles from where they’re crammed together in an armchair. As if showing more teeth will release the details they’re looking for.

“Then I brushed my teeth and went to sleep.”

A disappointed hush falls over the room. “That’s it? Nothing else?” Logan’s voice edges on desperate, the realization that they’re not going to learn anything helpful sinking in.

“I had a bad dream! The dinosaurs were there. They were scary, but Aunt Mary let me watch Frozen on the couch with her and Rooster, and then I wasn’t scared anymore!”

“Dinosaurs? What dinosaurs, Annie?” Danielle questions, confused as to what she could be talking about.

“The dinosaurs from the movie! Jurassic Park! I watched it with Daddy!”

“What is she talking about, Reuben?”

Danielle’s voice is deathly calm, causing the butts of every adult to clench in fear. The little girl pokes at her pseudo-uncle, not realizing the situation she’s created. “Spin, Jake! Spin!”

“Yeah, kid, we’re spinning, we’re spinning. Gonna spin so much while mommy and daddy have a chat in the kitchen.”

“You let her watch that?! Reuben! That used to give you nightmares if we watched it too late at night!”

A doubtful hum comes over the phone. “Okay, dropping the subject. How about this? You make the buffalo chicken dip, drop it off, then when you’re here, you can pick up your dress - I got a chance to fix the zipper.”

Mary raises an eyebrow at her phone. “You really want dip as payment for fixing my dress?”

“I want dip because I’m extremely pregnant, craving buffalo chicken dip, and you make the best I’ve ever had. The dress repair is free of charge because it took me two seconds.”

“I was going to stop by next week to pick-”

“Mary, I have three kids, and I’m eight months pregnant. This thing could blow at any time, and I don’t want you to have to wait four years to get your dress back. Which is definitely what will happen if you don’t pick it up before I give birth.” The two of them laugh at her exaggeration.

“Okay, okay. I’ll be by on Sunday with buffalo chicken dip to pick up my dress. What time should I come by so I don’t interrupt the party?”

“We officially said to come around three, but people will probably start dropping in sooner, so any time after two would be good. And you’re coming to the party.”

“I will be grabbing my dress, and then I will be leaving, Kristina.”

“Whatever you say, Mary.”

Mary weaves through the partygoers, smiling tensely at everyone who greets her.

“I thought you said this was starting - be careful, that’s hot - in an hour! Why is everyone already here?” She hisses in Kristina’s ear after adding her dish to the buffet line.

“It is! I also said people were probably going to come by early!” She pops a chip full of buffalo chicken dip into her mouth and moans. “Oh my god, that is so good!”

“I thought you meant like a few of the guys, not the entire guest list! I told everyone I wasn’t coming! How am I-” Mary gets cut off by Kristina shoving a ranch-covered baby carrot in her mouth.

“Calm down. Hang out for a little while, eat some food, and once the game gets going, you can sneak away and avoid whatever is happening between you and Bradley that you both insist isn’t happening.”

Mary splutters, trying to come up with a response, but gets interrupted before she can defend herself.

“Mary! I want you to meet someone!” Natasha joins them, pulling a brunette woman behind her. “This is my best friend, Flora Phillips! Flora, this is Mariella Vertucci. She’s the one I was telling you about!”

“Oh! You’re the one who made that coffee cake? Nat brought me a slice; it was amazing!” The two women shake hands. “It’s so nice to meet you!”

“You too! Nat said you run that flower shop down on Madison Ave?”

“She doesn’t just run it. She owns it. She’s Flora of Flora’s Florals!”

“Oh wow, that’s awesome!”

Phoenix and Kris move to greet Mav and Penny, who pop in to say hello before continuing to Warlock’s watch party. The other two women continue getting to know each other.

“So you’re in charge of all jet maintenance and repairs?”

“Yup, it’s my job to know everything that changes or gets fixed on the planes. It’s a lot of paperwork, meetings and debriefs, after-action reports, and training. Plus, I still cram hands-on time into my afternoons.”

“You do all that, and you’re still physically working on the planes yourself?”

“It helps keep me and my team on top of things. It’s much easier to sign off on a new mechanic’s report if I can see how they work and problem-solve through a roadblock in real-time.” Mary shrugs. “And I enjoy it; it makes the endless conference calls worth it.”

“I’m so glad I don’t have to deal with conference calls - hi Flora - it would be such a downer.” Jake wraps an arm around Flora’s shoulders, smiling down at her.

“Just wait until you make captain, Jacob, and all the fun responsibilities that come with that rank change.”

“Well, that’ll probably be happening soon enough, right, Bradshaw? It’s been a few years since I made lieutenant commander.” At his beckoning, Bradley comes over, standing next to Mary but refusing to make eye contact.

“You disobeyed orders on that carrier, got reamed into next year, and somehow got lieutenant commander before everyone else. I doubt you can pull the same thing for captain, Hangman.”

Jake turns to Mary, ignoring Bradley’s snark. “Where’s your better half tonight?”

“Stephen has a cold, so the Fitch family is staying home. And stop calling Danielle my better half! She’s married to my other best friend, and people keep getting the idea that we’re a throuple.”

“Are you not?”

“We are most definitely not. We’re platonic life partners.”

“See, that sounds like a relationship to me.”

“That’s because Javy does 95% of the emotional lifting in your friendship, Jake.” A muffled laugh interrupts their bickering. “Sorry about him, Flora. He gets less annoying the more you get to know him.”

“Oh, I know. Ever since Nat introduced us, Jake stops by the shop every few weeks for a plant checkup or to send some flowers to his mom, so I think we can officially be considered buddies.”

“Buddies? That is so hurtful, Flora! Would I make someone who is just a buddy my infamous TUA punch? Excuse us, Mary.” He directs her towards the makeshift bar on the dining room table.

“You know infamous is the bad one, right?” Flora questions as they go, making Mary laugh.

“You think they’re fucking?” The question startles her; she hadn’t forgotten Bradley was next to her, but she didn’t expect his first non-professional words in a month to be so blunt.

“I don’t know; they get along well, though. Lots of chemistry.” She moves toward the living room, ignoring the call of her name and joining a conversation with Brigham and Aaron, Fritz’s husband.

The next hour passes in a similar fashion. She’ll settle into a conversation, enjoying the company of her friends and their loved ones that have joined the party, when one of them brings Bradley into their chat. The next few minutes are uncomfortable, and Mary makes an excuse to leave the group. It happens over and over again until she finally makes her escape to the kitchen, where she pretends to be engrossed in getting food. Everyone leaves her alone, and it’s a nice moment of peace.

Until it’s not.

She groans internally when, out of the corner of her eye, she sees Bradley enter and make his way over.

“Did you make the buffalo chicken dip again? It’s delicious, even better than the one at Thanksgiving.”

“I did; thank you, Rooster.”

The entire room winces; she never calls him Rooster outside of work - barely even calls him Rooster at work - and everyone knows it. He tries to make more small talk, anything to get her to make eye contact with him again when someone bumps into his back. He’s jostled, and it loosens the solo cup in his hand, pouring red punch all down the front of her pale yellow sweater, seemingly in slow motion.

The kitchen is frozen, everyone staring at the duo in shock until yelling from the living room breaks the silence.

Bradley grabs a handful of paper towels and is trying to clean up her sweater when she grabs his wrist to stop him. He turns as red as the punch staining her top once he realizes exactly where his hands had been rubbing.

“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry, Mary, I-”

He’s cut off as Kristina takes charge of the situation, the elementary school teacher and mom of three having a spidey sense for when tears are looming on the horizon. “Alright, no big deal, folks. Mary, head upstairs, I’ll be right behind you, and we’ll get some stain remover on that. Bradley, Logan, please take care of the floor - I do not want ants in my house. Anyone who I did not just mention, if you’re done getting refreshments, please file into the living room so we have an easier time cleaning up.”

Everyone springs into action at her instructions, and she grabs Flora on her way, “Mind coming with me? I think I’m going to need a Switzerland for this one.”

The two women climb the stairs to find Mary standing at the sink in her sports bra, rinsing her shirt and taking deep breaths, trying to blink back tears. Flora nudges her to the side, grabbing the sweater and working stain remover into the fabric.

“So, do you want to talk about what just happened?”

“Nothing happened.” Mary insists.

“Really? That’s why Rooster has been walking around looking like a kicked puppy for the past four weeks?”

“He has not-”

“Yes!” Kris interrupts. “He has! Something happened the day that we went to the beach, and no one knows what’s going on. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but everyone is worried.”

Mary sniffles and starts to explain, tired of holding everything inside from that night. The other women stare in shock when she finishes.

Kris blinks at her. “I don’t understand; if all that happened, why have you been avoiding him for the past month?”

“Because it’s scary!”

“What’s scary?” Flora gently questions.

The tears in Mary’s eyes finally slide down her face, and her lip trembles as she takes a shaky breath. “It’s hard being fat. Men don’t ever want me for me. It’s just sex they’re after. No one ever wants to love me. They just want to fuck me. So it’s hard to believe that Bradley would actually want me.”

Flora grabs her hand when the tears start coming faster.

“He’s a gorgeous man who can have any woman he wants. But when I think about what it felt like to be on his lap, I know he wanted me. It’s not a question of did he or not - he did. Which is something I’ve never had before. When I realized how hard he was and he told me that I was the reason - that he’d been like that for two hours and wasn’t even going to say anything if I hadn’t brushed him - that’s the first time I can ever remember not worrying about my body. I didn’t think about what my stomach looked like or if my shirt was tucked into a fat roll. I didn’t worry about how my boobs sag, and my nipples point toward the ground. I didn’t even care about how much I weigh! I just climbed into his lap, and he welcomed me.”

She’s crying through her words, interrupting herself every so often with a hiccup.

“That look in his eyes… no one has ever looked at me like that before. It’s the first time I’ve ever felt desired. Wanted. And I wanted him. I want him so badly. If Annie hadn’t had that nightmare and interrupted us, I would have had sex with him right there on my couch. And I would have enjoyed it. I know it would have been good. And instead-“

She cuts herself off and presses a hand over her mouth, muffling a sob that shakes her shoulders. Kristina rubs her back, both women trying to comfort her.

“God, I fucking hate crying over this; it’s my own fault!” She angrily swipes at her tears. “Because after I put Annie back to bed, instead of talking to him or picking up where we left off, I sent him home! And I immediately regretted it, and I wanted to call him and tell him to come back, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it! Because I’m so scared of how he makes me feel! I have never been able to forget my body and just enjoy a moment. I am constantly aware of my body. What it’s doing, what it looks like, making sure my clothes sit just right so I don’t look too big. It’s fucking exhausting. I've never felt so comfortable with someone that I completely forgot to care about what I looked like because I knew they didn’t care. That they wanted me. I don’t know how to handle it!”

She tries to catch her breath, a month’s worth of built-up emotions pouring out at once, making her hyperventilate. Flora sits her down and rubs her back until her breathing evens out.

Kristina silently hands over a damp washcloth, Mary giving her a wobbly smile as she runs it over her face and rests it on the back of her neck, the cool sensation making it easier to ground herself.

“So, I know nothing about this situation except what you told us.” Flora breaks the quiet. “But from what you said and what I saw today, it seems like he has feelings for you. You should go for it.”

“I- really?”

“Mary, you’re a very nice person, but I don’t know you well enough to hold back or lie to you. He cares about you. As a friend? For sure, that’s obvious, you know that. But something in his face told me it’s more than that for him. You should talk to him.”

“If nothing else, I should apologize for kicking him out and ignoring him without any explanation, huh?”

“That would be a good start!” Kris nods encouragingly. “And then the next step is explaining how you love him and want to have his babies.”

Mary blinks up at her friend. “I think I’ll just go with the apology and see how things progress from there.”

“Fine, be boring! Seriously though, it would be good to talk to him. You’ve missed each other. Also, you should try the dress while you’re here and make sure the zipper is good.”

“I need you guys not to tell anyone what happened. I haven’t told anyone, and I don’t think Bradley has either.”

“I can’t believe you haven’t told Dani or Reuben.”

“They have a four-year-old and a newborn. I can’t tell them right now because they’ll worry too much - and they’re already not getting enough sleep as it is. Not to mention there’s a good chance Dani would try to kick Bradley’s ass.”

Flora injects. “But you started it? Why is he hypothetically getting beat up?”

“Because those two are extremely overprotective, and their actual children aren’t old enough to date yet, so all that energy gets focused on me. Not to mention how everyone would try to help and give advice. And while I appreciate that everyone cares so much, having that many people involved would just make it worse and more confusing. So at least until I talk to Bradley, please don’t say anything to anyone.”

“Too many cooks in the kitchen kinda deal, I get it. Not a peep from me.” When Kristina agrees, relief rushes through her body.

“Thank you, guys. Now where’s the dress?”

“Bedroom, through that door.” Kris directs her through the connecting door. “Hey Flora, can you ask the boys if one of them has a shirt Mary can wear home? There is no salvaging that sweater; sorry, babe, the red Hawaiian punch got to it.”

“Please just ask Bradley. He’s the only one who would have a shirt that would fit me. And thank you for everything, Flora. I owe you.”

“I’ll let you know when you can return the favor.” Flora winks at her, heading downstairs to find her something to wear.

“Will you stop wiggling!” Kris scolds, struggling to get the zipper all the way up with the way Mary keeps moving. “There! Now take your socks off; it’s ruining the image.”

“Oh, like how my bra was “ruining” the image?” Mary mocks, bending over to pull her socks off.

“You had a yellow sports bra poking out the sides of your sexy, little black dress. Yes, it was ruining the picture.” She unclips Mary’s hair, fluffing it out before spinning her around. “Damn, if I wasn’t happily married and you were into women, I would be all over you.”

Mary doesn’t even blush like she usually does when one of the girls flirts with her. She’s transfixed by her reflection. She’s never looked so good. Even with the puffy eyes and red nose, she looks good. Twisting side to side, she can’t believe this is the same dress she bought last month.

“What did you do?”

“I fixed the zipper! And adjusted the side seams and fixed the hem. I know clothing isn’t made by hand nowadays, but god, this was shitty even by mass production standards.” Kris scoffs and rolls her eyes.

“Thank you! You’re magic, oh my god, Kris!” She’s in awe. She never thought she could feel this confident in a skin-tight dress. “What do I owe you?”

“Nothing, it was fun, and honestly, after I got in there, it would have driven me insane to know I was sending you with such a poorly constructed piece. I was happy to do it. Though, if you want to occasionally bring goodies over when the squad is deployed, I would not complain.”

“Done. Just send a text whenever you need a break from cooking, and I’ll stop by with stuff to get you through a few days. We were already planning to rally the troops to bring you and Danielle stuff when the boys are gone, so we’ll have to start a list of stuff the kids like to make it easier.”

“Deal.” Angry screams interrupt them. “Speaking of my children. I have to take care of that before it turns into crying.”

Mary waves her away. “Go, go. Flora can unzip me when she comes back.”

When the door shuts, she goes back to admiring herself in the mirror. She can’t even bring herself to feel silly for the way she twirls, smiling so big her cheeks hurt. This is the best I’ve looked in years…

Her internal monologue is interrupted by a knock.

“Come in!” She strikes a pose. “What do you think?”

“You look beautiful.”

“Bradley!” She turns in surprise, her heart thrumming. “I’m sorry!”

“What?” He freezes just inside the door, a sweatshirt clutched in his fist.

“I’m trying to apologize. I’ve been avoiding you since we went to the beach. That night… I just didn’t know how to handle it. I know I started it, but I wanted to explain how-”

“I think we should forget what happened.” He interrupts.

Her heart stops. “What?”

“I don’t regret what we did, but you clearly do-”

“I don’t regret it!” She protests. “I started it because I wanted it, Bradley. I wanted you.”

“Mary, you kicked me out, and the only reason you’ve talked to me in the last month is if it was necessary at work.” Bradley says gently. “I don’t want to lose you as a friend, and I don’t want you to resent me, so I think it’s best to act like it didn’t happen.”

“But I don’t want-”

“It’s the best thing to do, Mary.”

“You’re not going to let me explain? You just want to forget about it without even talking about it?”

The tension is high, the two of them staring into each other’s eyes.

“Here’s a sweatshirt to borrow; I’m sorry for spilling on you.” He tosses it onto the bed and turns to leave.

“Bradley…” Her voice is thick, tears starting to build again, even as he stops to look at her. “I- I-”

I can’t believe you won’t let me explain.

I can’t believe you don’t want to talk about this.

I can’t believe I put myself out there just to get rejected again.

His eyes tell her that she won’t be able to change his mind; he’s determined and stubborn. Qualities she usually admires about him. She sighs in defeat, knowing she can’t win.

“Could you unzip me? I can’t take this dress off by myself.”

He crosses the room, and she turns around, goosebumps erupting when he moves her hair to the side. He undoes the clasp and grabs the zipper, pulling it slowly down her back. His fingers brush her skin, sending shivers up and down her spine.

They make eye contact in the mirror. His hands pause at the middle of her back. Hers pressing the dress against her chest so it doesn’t slip. Both of them flushed from the proximity, from sadness; it’s not clear what emotion is winning out.

“Is that far enough?” He mummers in her ear.

She nods, “Thank you.”

He lingers for a minute, not moving. “You are so beautiful, Mary.”

He’s gone before she can even process the compliment, the door punctuating his departure. Mary tilts her head to the ceiling, willing herself not to cry again.

It doesn’t work.

The sweatshirt is his version of the one she wore that night. His call sign stitched on the sleeve in the same place as hers. The navy blue fabric absorbs a tear as she runs her fingers over the white letters.

Rooster.

She slowly redresses, hesitating slightly before pulling her borrowed shirt on. It fits, just like she knew it would. It’s slightly loose on Rooster when he wears it, so she knew it wouldn’t be too tight on her. She still has to roll the sleeves a few times, sniffing back tears as his cologne reminds her what it’s like to be near him. What it was like to be so close to him that night.

There’s a quick knock, and Phoenix’s head pops through the door, eyes closed. “Are you decent? Can we come in?”

“Just one second!” Mary wipes her face, making sure it doesn’t look like she was crying. “Okay, come on in.”

“Wow…” Nat wiggles her eyebrows, flopping on the bed. “Look at you, wearing Rooster’s flight school sweatshirt! It’s like the adult equivalent of giving you his letterman jacket.”

“That’s ridiculous! I have my own flight school shirt with my own call sign. I don’t need a man to give me his.”

“How do you have one?” Natasha sits up, almost knocking heads with Flora.

“When I was the engineering liaison in Pensacola, I got to know the brass pretty well. One of the admirals kinda took me under his wing and showed me the ropes. Really helped me understand how the Navy works. And, of course, I was so brilliant that I quickly became his favorite civilian. So when I left, he got me a sweatshirt.” She dramatically flips her hair over her shoulder. “Mostly because I had been subtly complaining for like three years that I wanted one, and it wasn’t fair that all the gross boys got one, but I didn’t.”

“You’re not a pilot, Mary.”

“That’s exactly what he said! So unfair.” She rolls her eyes and tuts.

It’s all an act. Can’t you tell it’s an act?

The jokes feel flat coming out of her mouth; the words taste bitter. But she can’t give Natasha any trace of sadness. She knows Bradley was just in here; she’ll smell the blood in the water. And she’s not ready to give so much of herself away to another innocent bystander today. She didn’t even mean to earlier, even if they were nice about it.

“That’s gotta be over soon, right? How long can this game go?” Kris asks as cheering from the living room mingles with their laughter.

“Wait! Oh my god, did I tell you? For Valentine’s Day, Logan hired a babysitter and said we’re going to get massages and then eat Taco Bell alone in our mini-van. At eight months pregnant, it’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard.”

“You gonna get frisky in the backseat?”

“We’re gonna try, but we might just nap instead, which sounds just as good. What about you, Flora? Any plans?”

“No plans. Not only am I extremely single, but Valentine’s Day is one of the busiest days of the year for me at the shop. It’s tied for first with Mother’s Day. And it being a Sunday this year just adds even more difficulty because half my vendors won’t ship on Saturdays, so it’s been a logistical nightmare trying to get all the flowers ordered.”

“How many orders do you have this year?”

“God, even more than last year, Nat!” Flora flops back. “Which is great - I’m so happy business is growing - but it’s so stressful. I hired a second driver! Thankfully Calliope’s brother was looking for some extra cash because we’re bordering on 350 orders right now. And I’m still accepting orders until close on Friday.”

Natasha pets her best friend’s head. “Let me know if you need help. I’ll happily come by on Saturday and process roses for you.”

“You have plans Saturday.”

“Not until Saturday night, and I would skip it if you needed help.”

“What are you doing on Saturday?” Kris asks, relaxing in the rocking chair on the other side of the room.

“Oh! I didn’t tell you guys yet!” Phoenix pops up, looking excited. “Streets, that club over on Elm, is having a special thing for Valentine’s Day! It’s apparently a speed dating thing, but I think everyone is just going to drink and dance. All the single people in the squad and some of the control room people are going. Mary, you’re coming - I won’t take no for an answer - and you should invite your mechanics!”

“Okay! That sounds fun! What’re we wearing?”

“Really?! I don’t have to convince you? All the boys took forever to say yes! I don’t know what I’m wearing yet, but you, me, and Callie should get dinner tomorrow and figure it out!”

“Zero convincing needed.” Mary’s smile is strained, not fully reaching her eyes. All three women notice but don’t say anything. “I’m single with zero prospects on the horizon. Maybe I’ll find a boyfriend! Or at least a date.”

Kris freezes, eyes snapping to Flora, who is equally confused. Both of them wondering what changed in the few minutes they were gone.

“What time is it? I should get going. I still have to go to the grocery store.”

The four women make their way downstairs, Mary yelling a quick goodbye as she pulls her sneakers on.

“You can’t leave, M&M! The game isn’t over yet!” Jake complains from his post against the living room doorframe.

“Jake, sweetie, I don’t know how to explain to you how little I care about football. Also, when I do care about football - which is approximately once a year, and unfortunately, you’ve missed this season’s opportunity - it’s to cheer for the Bills.”

“You like the Bills?” Omaha’s voice edges on disgusted. “You’re just like Payback.”

“I’m from New York, went to school in Buffalo, and my family doesn’t do football. All that plus my thousand-year friendship with Reuben equals reluctant Bills fan by association.”

“But they-”

“Suck? Yes, I know. I also don’t care.” She opens the front door, waving sarcastically. “Okay, bye!”

Her eyes meet Bradley’s before the front door closes, and her chest instantly tightens. The happiness that had built up from spending time with the girls dissipating in a second.

I can get over him. I can do it… I have to.

if you would like to be added (or removed) from the tag list please send an ask!

@gretagerwigsmuse | @bobfloyds | @hangmanbrainrot | @notroosterbradshaw | @princessphilly | @roleycoleyreccenter | @thesewordsareallihavetogive | @a-court-of-roscoe-and-baby | @katieshook02 | @hellojameshowyadoin | @aristotles-butthole | @atarmychick007 | @whatislovevavy | @kmc1989 | @sometimesanalice

fic tag | credit for dividers here

[the-iceni-bitch]

Puppy Love

Pairing: Jake Jensen/Fem-Reader

Words: 4684

Summary: You and Jake Jensen work together for the first time on a recon mission. You’re the consummate professional, while Jake is basically a man-child with a heart of gold. Will he be able to soften your cold demeanor?

Warnings: Explicit language, explicit sexual content, explicit descriptions of violence, SMUT, 18+

A/N: I ended up be a little later than I had planned with this one as I wanted to do some edits since the first draft didn’t seem quite right to me, but here it is, for day 5 of my birthday week. I actually watched “The Losers” for the first time today and I would highly recommend it. It’s a bit on the cheesy side but Jake Jensen really makes it worth it. I’m going to tag @stargazingfangirl18​ and @starlightcrystalline​, as I know they’re fans of Jake’s. Please enjoy!

“What’s he look like again?”

“Golden retriever in human form, blond buzz, goatee, Harry Potter glasses.” Aisha instructed you over your phone. “Probably stuffing his face at the buffet. He’ll have a comm for you. Thanks for stepping in for me at the last minute.”

“Well, you didn’t give me that much of a choice.” You said, no real malice behind it. You did owe her after all. “Found him. Talk to you in a sec.”

She had been right, you found your contact at the buffet, balancing two plates on one forearm and loading them with an obscene amount of h’ors douvres. He didn’t notice you walking up behind him, he was so engrossed in the spread.

“Jensen?”

The man nearly jumped out of his skin, just barely avoiding spilling foie gras on his tux.

“Shit.” He muttered under his breath as he set the plates down on a table and turned back to you. “Y/N? Hi! Call me Jake!” He wiped his hands on his pants leg before offering you one to shake in greeting.

You cocked one eyebrow at him as he gave you a slightly crooked grin and took his hand. “Right, you have a comm for me?”

“Crap, yes, here you go.” He handed the small earpiece and gave you a good look, eyes scanning up and down your body. You were wearing a long sleeve green satin gown. The bodice hugged you tightly down to your hips before flaring into a skirt that had a slit running all the way up your leg. The gown didn’t have a back, showing off the lean muscles moving beneath your skin.

Jensen cleared his throat and took what you thought was supposed to be a nonchalant pose; leaning back on one foot with his arms crossed, one eyebrow lifted in an expression you couldn’t identify. “So,” he said in an artificially deep voice. “Where, uh, where are you from?”

You rolled your eyes and ignored the question as you inserted the comm link into your ear. “Comm test, can you read me, Aisha?”

“I read you, I see you found Jensen.”

“Yeah, where are we heading?”

“Right down to business, I can respect that.” Jensen said, nodding his head as he shuffled his feet and crossed and uncrossed his arms repeatedly, trying to give off an air of confidence and failing miserably.

“There’s a hallway to your left that should lead to the north wing of the property where the entrance to the server room is. Security is pretty lax right now but they’re definitely still there so make sure you don’t look suspicious.”

“Got it.” You turned back to Jensen and put one arm through his, giving him a radiant smile as the two of you started to head down the hall.

“Hahaha, what’s happening?” Jensen laughed nervously at your sudden and extreme change in demeanor.

“Relax, Jensen. We’re just taking a stroll to look at the artwork. Nothing that should concern anyone.”

“Oh, ok. Are you acting right now? You’re really good at it.”

Your smile started to strain. Wasn’t this guy supposed to be a professional? “That’s part of the job.” You grabbed a glass of champagne from one of the waiters before you headed down the hallway. You nodded to Jensen to grab one as well, hoping that if he started drinking, he might stop talking.

You were wrong.

“I always feel so awkward when I have to act on a job, you know? Like, what’s my character’s story? His motivations?” He took a sip of champagne. “Mm, this is good.”

You chugged your glass in one gulp. Maybe if you got a buzz going, the constant chatter wouldn’t bother you as much.

“Wow. That was impressive.”

“Jensen, Y/N is too much of a pro to say so, but you need to shut the fuck up.” Aisha said through your comms, exasperated. You heard laughing from the rest of the team in the background and gave a small smirk.

“Right, sorry. I babble when I’m nervous.” He said, taking another sip of champagne.

You were getting close to the server room now and saw a security guard walking towards you. You pulled Jensen off to the side and stared at a beautiful replica of John William Waterhouse’s ‘The Soul of the Rose’.

“Tell me about this one, sweetie.” You said, your voice sickeningly sweet as you giggled breathlessly and looked at Jensen coquettishly, fluttering your eyelashes at him.

“Uhh, this is a painting of… a woman, um, smelling a rose. From…. Sometime in the past?” He said, painfully.

Fortunately, the guard didn’t stop to analyze the absolute stupidity that was coming out of this man’s mouth. He continued past the two of you and you started to head back towards your destination.

“Fascinating analysis, Jensen.” You said dryly.

“Listen, I can’t ad lib. I need time to prepare my lines.”

“How have you survived in this… fuck.” You drew him back sharply before he had a chance to round the corner. There were two guards posted at the door to the server room. “Aisha, we’ve got two bogies right where we need to be. Is there any other way in?”

“Shit, no. Vents are welded shut and the roof is crawling with security, so the sky light isn’t an option.”

You chewed your lips as you weighed the several different scenarios. “Is there a closet or other sort of storage nearby?”

“Yeah, there’s a janitor’s closet right across the hall.”

“Great.” Not trusting your partner to act the part believably, you figured startling him would get him into a convincing state.

You grabbed his ears and pulled his face to yours, kissing him hard. He gave a small yelp into your mouth as you pulled him backwards with you, into the view of the two waiting guards. You separated from him and he gave you a goofy grin trying to kiss you again as you turned away from him, pulling him by his wrist and giggling.

You staggered drunkenly towards the two guards and gave them a sloppy grin. “’Scuse me.“ You slurred at them. Jensen collided into your back clumsily, panting breathlessly. “We’re looking for the bathroom.”

“You need to move out of this area.” One of the guards scowled at you, his hand moving to the gun holstered on his hip.

“How… dare you?” You whined, stepping forward and poking him in the chest. “Do you even know who you’re talking to? Do you know who my daddy is?”

The guard looked past you at Jensen. “Sir, you need to take her out of here.”

“Don’t you talk over me!” You dug your hand in your purse. “I’m calling daddy right now, you are going to be so fired.”

He rolled his eyes and moved to grab your arm when you pulled the syringe out of your purse and plunged it into his neck. He let out a hiss and slumped against the wall. You pulled his gun out of the holster and whipped the other guard across the face with it before he had a chance to reach for his radio.

“Wait, was that not a real kiss?” Jensen asked with a confused look on his face. He stared at the two guards lying on the floor, his brain trying to catch up with everything that just happened.

“Oh my god, Jensen, get your head in the game.” Aisha scolded through the comms.

“Help me get them into the closet.” You hissed at him after you managed to gag and hogtie both of them.

“Right.” You shoved the guards into the tiny storage area and forced the door closed. Jensen moved to the key pad and connected it to his phone, a look of concentration coming over his face as he got to work.

You rolled your neck loosely as you waited and in less than a minute he made a small triumphant noise.

“Jensen comes in in the clutch and the crowd goes wild!” He made a noise like cheers in a stadium and put his hand up to give you a high five.

You opened the door to the server room and headed in, leaving him hanging. You heard him slap his own hand before he followed you. “So serious.” You heard him whisper over the comms. “ ‘Good job Jensen. And by the way that kiss was amazing, let’s do it again.’ “

“We can hear you, idiot.” Aisha said in your ears, her tone dripping with annoyance.

“Oops.”

“Where’s the server we want?” You asked him over your shoulder.

“This way.” He led you down an aisle to your right before arriving at the server you needed, pulling a small tablet out of his tux jacket and connecting it. “This should just take a few minutes.”

“Great.”

“So, um, how do you know Aisha?” he said, trying to fill the silence.

“High school.” You said flatly.

“Oh, really? That long?”

“No.”

“Of course not. She mentioned something about Finland?”

“Yep.”

“So, snowy there, huh?”

“Sure is.”

“Oook.” He felt horribly awkward. He knew he had no game, but dealing with women like you and Aisha really cemented that. He turned his concentration back to the algorithm that was running and started singing Bon Jovi to himself.

You rolled your eyes. You couldn’t believe Aisha worked with this man-child. He must be a genius with computers for her to put up with this bullshit. Granted, he filled out that tux real nice; his broad shoulders stretching the back of the jacket in a titillating way before his torso narrowed in an almost perfect V to his hips. The jacket covered it some, but you could tell he had a nice ass under the slacks as well. Maybe she kept him around for the eye candy.

“Wanted, wantehehed, dead or alive! And done!” He finished up, disconnecting from the server and turning to give you another goofy grin.

You smirked at him and started to head back out of the room.

“Was that an almost smile, Y/N?” he said teasingly behind you. “Are you warming up to me?”

“Please stop talking,” You told him half-heartedly, too mentally exhausted to really scold him.

You turned the corner and ran into three armed guards. You all stared at each other for a second before they drew their guns and brought them up to fire.

You shoved Jensen behind the servers and dove after him as bullets started ricocheting everywhere.

“We’re blown, Aisha! We need an exit.”

“Shit, hold them down while I work something out.”

“Got it. You armed, Jensen?” You looked at him as you slipped out of your heels.

“Fuck, no. I was worried a gun would ruin the lines of my tux.”

“That is so fucking stupid.” You hissed. Of course, you hadn’t brought a gun either, but that was because you knew the venue’s security measures would have gone into hyper drive if you had gotten caught with one. You shoved your shoes into Jensen’s arm along with your purse as you pulled out a ceramic blade from under your skirt.

“Where were you keeping that?” Jensen asked you, eyes bulging as he tried to imagine where you could have been storing the giant knife in your skintight dress.

You gave him a grunt as you edged your way between the servers slowly, moving closer to the gunman as they shuffled forward, continuing to fire at the two of you.

You reached the server next to the nearest gunman and shot your arm out to knock the gun out of his hand. You brought a knee up into his diaphragm and plunged your knife in between his shoulders and then his neck, slipping back between the servers as he dropped to the floor.

The other two guards seemed to remember suddenly that they were in a room full of delicate computer equipment and they stowed their weapons, dropping into fight ready stances as they tried to determine where you were.

You shot out like a whip, punching the first guard in the gut then the throat and grabbing him around the waist to tackle him. You used the momentum to carry you forward and delivered a scorpion kick to the other man’s face, making him stagger back into the servers, clutching his nose. The first man wasn’t going down, so you released him and sprung off one leg to push off a server wall and whip the opposite foot around to drive into his face hard, sending him sprawling as you landed on one knee beside him, plunging your knife into his chest.

“Jesus, Jensen what’s happening?” Aisha yelled over the comms.

“Uhh, Y/N is kicking some serious ass.” Jake watched you stand up slowly from the second body, spinning your knife through your fingers as you turned to face your final opponent.

“Well both of you need to get to the skylight ASAP for extraction, Pooch’ll be there with a chopper in exactly one minute.”

“Got it. You get that, Y/N?”

“Yeah, just a second.” You jumped up to grab one of the pipes running along the ceiling and wrapped your thighs around the guard’s neck, squeezing him hard enough to cut off blood and oxygen to his brain. You didn’t notice him draw a knife of his own from a sheath at his thigh.

Jake hissed when he saw and grabbed the gun the first guard had dropped, shooting your opponent three times in his chest before he had a chance to slash across your femoral artery. You landed on your feet as he dropped between your legs.

“Nice shot.” You told Jake, giving him an approving nod as the two of you started to jog to the extraction point.

“Aww, shucks.” Jake groaned internally at that, not wanting to think about how stupid he sounded.

“We’re here.” You told Aisha over the comm.  “How exactly is Pooch getting us out of here? There’s no room on the roof for a chopper.”

“He’s going to drop you a line.”

“Great.” The skylight was purely for show, there was no way to open it. You pushed Jake back and took the gun from him when you heard chopper blades, and shot the glass out of the window.

A rope dropped through the opening immediately and Jake wrapped his right leg and arm through it before holding you to him with his left arm.

“Hi.” He said sheepishly as he looked at you. “Wait, weren’t there guards on the roof?”

You didn’t get a chance to answer as the two of you were lifted into the air as the chopper took off. You heard gunfire and saw muzzle flashes before you were exposed to the open air.

A bullet ripped through the air less than 6 inches from your face and Jake swore. “Don’t drop me.” You told him as you started firing at the guards on the roof, making sure to pick your shots carefully so you didn’t waste any bullets.

Once you were safely out of gun range, someone in the chopper started pulling the two of you up. Jake gave a melodramatic sigh once the two of you were safely inside, laying back against the floor, still holding you to him, before he let out a whoop and sat up quickly, releasing you. He watched you with one of those ridiculous grins on his face as you settled yourself into one of the seats.

“That was exciting!” He said giddily. “Cougar, you should have seen it. Y/N took out three guys with guns with just a knife and, like, her legs.”

You couldn’t help it, that damn smile of his was too infectious. Your lips curled up slightly as he narrated the fight to a disinterested Cougar, leaning you head back against the chopper. The idiot had grown on you.

“And, hoo, when you kicked that one guy in the face, while you were tackling the other guy. Man, that was fucking ace!” He finished up his narration as you landed back at the warehouse.

Clay and Aisha greeted you when you landed. Aisha let out a deep breath once she saw to two of you step out of the chopper, tension leaving her body.

“You two get it done?” Clay asked.

“We sure did, boss! Backdoor is open for us anytime!” Jake said excitedly.

“Perfect, let’s all get some drinks.”

“Glad you’re ok, Y/N.” Aisha said, handing you a shot of tequila when you arrived at the basic bar set up.

“Well, we’re officially even now.” You told her around a grin before tossing back your shot and pouring another.

“Don’t worry, I won’t ask you for any more favors.” She said through a smile of her own.

“Aw, c’mon, Aisha. The two of us make a pretty killer team! I think she should maybe join our little loser club!” Jensen draped an arm around your shoulder. He had undone his bowtie and the top few buttons of his shirt, exposing a light dusting of dark hair at the top of his chest. He looked down at you and gave you a grin and a wink.

Well, fuck.

You slammed your second shot back, nodded to Aisha, and pulled Jake by his wrist to follow you to one of the side rooms of the warehouse as he gave you a look of confusion.

“Have fun, you two. Don’t break him, Y/N!” You heard Aisha call behind you.

“Um, what are we doing?” Jake asked as you pulled the door to one of the storage rooms closed behind you.

“Stop talking, before I change my mind.” You told him, placing a finger over his lips as you slid his tux jacket off his shoulders.

You stepped into him, your body pressing him into the door as you brought his face to yours for a kiss before he could start babbling again. You teased at his lips with your teeth before running your tongue around the cushion of his bottom lip and he opened himself to you, groaning into your mouth. He kneaded his hands into your hips, pulling you against him close. You felt him starting to harden through his pants and gave him a sigh before you started moving your mouth down his jaw to his neck as you started to unbutton his shirt.

“Shit.” He murmured as you lightly sucked against his pulse point, drawing a soft bruise against his skin as your hands finished their work on his buttons and he shrugged his shirt off. You stepped back to let him remove his undershirt too and gave a moan when his torso was fully exposed, running your fingers over his abs lightly before pressing your palms against the plain of his chest.

“Mmm, who knew you were packing all this under here sweetie.” You murmured before moving your mouth back to his neck before you started slowly traveling south.

“Um, Y/N? Is this just like, a post-mission type thing? Or what?” His voice cracked when your tongue ran over his nipple as you tweaked the other. You kept moving down his abs until you reached the top of his pants and started to undo his belt, kneeling in front of him. “Not that there’s any pressure, or anything, just curio-- mmph.”

You had slipped your panties off as he chattered away and shoved them in his mouth before you went back to undoing his fly.

“Seriously, Jake, you need to shut the fuck up.” You pulled his zipper down finally, and drew his pants and boxers down his legs so they pooled around his ankles.

You gave yourself a little hum as you examined his cock. His swollen head was already leaking pre-cum before you had even touched him. You spat in your hand before wrapping it around his impressive length, giving him a few pumps as you lapped soft kitten licks over his slit. He gave a groan from deep in his chest and leaned his head back against the door, thumping his fist against it at his side.

You took the head of his cock in your mouth and hummed around it, causing him to twitch before you moved him further in and slowly back out, repeating the process to take him a little further into your mouth with each bob of your head.

Jake was using all his concentration to keep from coming 30 seconds into a blowjob like a chump. The tangy taste of your arousal was on his tongue as he bit down on your panties, which wasn’t helping. When you started breathing through your nose and relaxed your throat to swallow around him though, he was lost.

He let out a muffled groan and pressed a hand to the back of your head when he bucked his hips and shot his release down your throat.

You let his softening dick slide out of your mouth as you wiped a small amount of drool from around your mouth with your fingertips. You drew yourself up to your feet and plucked your now saliva soaked panties from his mouth before pulling him in for another kiss.

“Was that good for you, honey?” You asked, giving him a wicked smile as he rested his forehead against yours, panting as he came down from his orgasm.

“Fuck, yeah, that was good.” He said, kissing you again as his big hands pressed into the small of your back before moving their way up to your shoulders.

He slid the shoulders of your gown down your arms slowly and then down your hips once your arms were free. You stepped out of it as it pooled on the ground and he turned you suddenly until he had you pinned against the wall.

Jake took a step back and drank you in. He ran his hand over your hips and up your abdomen until he was cupping your breasts, gently running his thumbs over your nipples until they were raised to sensitive peaks.

“Mmhm, pretty girl.” He murmured as he palmed your breasts, making you gasp. “I’m gonna make you feel good too, baby.”

He removed his glasses and set them on the table behind him before stepping into you and curling his thick fingers over your mound. You bit your lip and moaned as he teased his way between your soft folds, brushing his fingers through the arousal at your entrance as he sank to his knees.

He pushed your lips apart gently, then dragged his tongue over your slit heavily, causing your knees to buckle when he found your clit. He moved one of your legs over his shoulder to keep you from falling as he started licking small circles over the tiny bud.

He shook his head from side to side to press himself deeper into you before sucking gently, making you cry out. His tongue entered your canal and he started to alternate between fucking you with it, and sucking on your clit.

You felt your core tightening as your orgasm built and you ground yourself into Jake’s face, begging him for more. He wrapped his lips around you tightly and sucked hard, and you felt the coil in your belly snap as you screamed his name and your release gushed all over his mouth and chin. You kept grinding against him as you came down and once you had finally finished, he gave you a wicked grin from between your legs before rising back up to kiss you.

You felt your desire stirring again already when you tasted yourself on his tongue and you let out a heavy sigh. He pressed himself into your front and lifted you until you could wrap your legs around his waist. He pressed his face into the hollow of your throat and softly nipped at the skin there. You gave a soft whine and gripped the back of his neck.

“You good with me fucking you against the wall, sweetheart?” He asked against your neck.

“Oh, fuck, yes.” You said breathlessly as he continued nuzzling you softly.

He kept you propped against the wall as he moved a hand between the two of you to line up at your entrance. You felt his tip brush against your folds and let out a sigh, trying to grind yourself into him.

He pulled his head up and gave you one of those grins before lowering you slowly onto his length. You moaned as you stretched over him until he was fully seated in you.

Jake gave a grunt and braced one hand against the wall before he started moving his hips, fucking his cock up into you roughly. His breath was hot against your neck as he panted in time with his thrusts, making you whimper softly in his ear.

“God, sweetheart, you’re so tight. This pussy feels so good.”

He started to pick up the pace then. You screwed your eyes shut and tilted your head back with a low moan, loving the full feeling he was giving you in this position. Jake lifted his head to look at you and watch as you took his cock, your tits bouncing each time he drove up into you. He bent his face down to nuzzle against them and you gasped as he drew his tongue over your nipple.

His cock was hitting your sweet spot each time and the position you were in had him rubbing right against your clit. You could feel yourself building towards an orgasm fast and dug your nails into the muscles of his back.

He felt you starting to flutter and clench around him and picked up the pace, adjusting the hand he had holding you up so your hips tilted just a bit and that small change sent you over the edge.

“Fuck, baby, that’s it!” You cried as every muscle in your body tightened and vibrated while your pleasure released violently. Jake kept his relentless pace up as you rode it out and you sagged against him when you came down.

You felt his hips start to stutter and then his dick was twitching inside of you, his cum filling you up until it was leaking out around his cock.

“Fuck, sorry.” He murmured against your hair as he held you to him. “I meant to pull out.”

You lifted his head up and slowly unwrapped yourself from him, placing your feet on the floor gently and almost collapsing on your shaky legs.

“That’s ok baby.” You said, giving him a reassuring pat on the cheek. You gave him a hungry kiss, painting the inside of his mouth with your tongue before whispering in his ear, “I love feeling your cum leaking out of my cunt.”

He gave a laugh that was on the hysterical side as you started to slip your gown back on. He was sliding into his pants when you turned back to him, and he gave you a sheepish grin. He found your panties as he was drawing his shirt off the ground and tried to hand them to you.

“Oh, sweetie, you keep those.” You told him with a throaty chuckle. “They can be a little souvenir.”

Fuck, that’s hot. He thought to himself as he tucked them into his back pocket.

“So, should we do this again sometime?” He asked awkwardly, not knowing what to say to you now. He definitely wanted to do it again. He wanted to do it a lot. But he was worried this was just a quick fling for you, a release after a stressful mission.

“Aww, puppy.” You pouted playfully at him. “We’ll do it again. Those stupid grins of yours have grown on me. I don’t think I have it in me to break your heart.”

He gave you one of those signature grins now as he pressed himself into your back and nuzzled in your hair. You whipped the door open and held his hand as you led him out to a chorus of whistles and catcalls, and he wore that stupid grin all night.

Permanent Tags:

@drabblewithfrannybarnes​

[lilousmustaches]

Work this out

Jake Peralta x Reader

Warnings: Ladies stuff, i won't say anything else to avoid spoilers. 

Notes: Here i am writing again after 3 years.... a total new fandom. I am watching b99 and i'm so addicted, Jake is the only thing in my mind right now and i had to do this. It didn't go as i planned, but i hope it's ok. It's small and english is not my first language. Expect more of Jake x Reader here, it's my first try and voilá. 

Summary: Jake and the reader have a friends with benefits relationship and suddenly she starts to act strange. 

Another work day in NYPD's 99 precinct. It had everything to be another normal day. Well... normal as it can get down there. But it wasn't.

 Immediately when you entered the precinct, Jake turned his head up from his computer to give you a smile and probably a silly joke provoking you. But his smile vanished as soon as he saw you pass everyone with your head down, no good mornings and going somewhere down the hall.

 "Hey" Rosa called looking between Jake and the hall you just disappeared. "What's up with (Y/N)?" 

 "I don't know." Jake responded confused as everybody else in the room. You were a joyful person, always smiling and greeting every single person that worked there. 

 "What have you done Jake?" Amy asked angry assuming it was his fault since everyone knew about yours friends with benefits relationship that has been going on for a while now. 

 "What? Nothing" Jake answered quickly indignant with the assumption. 

 "No, Amy is right Jake." Boyle said getting up of his desk and coming closer. "(Y/N) is acting weird this days, yesterday she didn't even wanted to eat some of my salmon cookies. She loves that. And coming here and not giving my good morning hug? Definitely something's strange." 

 "Boyle is right on that one." Rosa agreed with her arms crossed. 

 "I don't know ok?" Jake answered frustrated with your strange behavior rising his hands in surrender. "(Y/N) didn't went to my place this last weekend, in fact I had barely seen her for the past days. I really have no idea... maybe she's just trying to dump me and trying to make it easier." 

 "Or maybe she's tired of waiting for you to ask her out on a real date and assume her as your girlfriend!" Boyle pointed raising an eyebrow to his friend. "You should tell her how you really feel." 

 "Yeah, haven't you kept her waiting long enough?" Amy agreed. Everybody that met you and Jake knew eventually you were going to stay together. You had the same kind of humor and the same sassy tone. So it wasn't exactly a surprise when in one of the squad's reunions at the bar, you and Jake got hammered and started to talk and laugh closer to each other. Not a long time after that, you both disappeared going straight to his house. "It's has been months since this 'friends with benefits' thing started." 

 "Look guys." Jake said with a frustrated sigh rolling his eyes. "(Y/N) and I have talked about this. She's not ready yet for a relationship, she passed a hard time with that son of a bitch ex of hers. She needs time and I respect that."

 "Oh here she comes." Rosa alerted and quickly everybody went back to their places and pretended to be working. You came out of the files room discussing something with Terry. 

 "Okay (Y/N), we can work on that. Good job." Terry said with a sweet smile going back to his desk, and you to yours. You sat down in silence still not looking around organizing your paperwork, but notice everyone quiet and you could literally feel their stares burning on your skin. 

 "What?" You finally said looking around to your colleagues and everybody tried to disguise murmuring a lot of 'nothing' 'just working'. Everybody unless Jake. He was watching you intensely trying to figure out what was wrong. 

 Your eyes locked for a second and you could see that he was worried, and that broke your heart even more. This wasn't supposed to happen right now. Your heart was beating fast and nervousness took over your body. You quickly turned your attention to your desk again and took your purse pretending to organize something there. 

 "Good morning squad, today..." Captain Holt started to say walking out of his office but stopped in his tracks when looked over your desk and catch the sight of something inside your purse. He looked back and forth you and Jake. "Oh..." 

 "Oh what? What oh?" Jake asked fast doing his classic bite lip when he was anxious, trying to figure out what Holt saw that he didn't. 

 "Hmm" Holt said looking at Jake like he didn't know what to do now. "(Y/N) please come to my office." 

 Jake watched you get up and follow Holt into his office, closing the door behind you and closing the shutters. He strained his eyes shaking his head in denial. Ok, this was how things was going to go? Fine! He was a detective and he was so on for this investigation.

xXxXxXxXx

 Jake wanted to stay and see your expression when you got out of Holt's office, but duty called and he had to be on the streets all day. He put everyone on the precinct working on the case '(Y/N)'s secret 0.1', and every minimum suspicious movement, they were oriented to send him a message.

 Charles really took it seriously. 

 Nothing useful thought. Man he was frustrated, he solves all type of cases everyday but he couldn't figure out what was wrong with the women he liked? It was driving him crazy! 

 It has just grown dark when Jake entered back the 99, some people from the night shift was already there and he could only spot Boyle from his friends.

 "Hey Jake! Did you read my messages? Did you find them useful?" 

 "Hmmm... Yeah Charles, of course, thank you." Jake said after pondering the answer in his head although It was no useful at all. Charles told him every single one of your steps through the day, Jake wanted to know if you did something strange not your constant need to pee on that day. "(Y/N) already went home?"

 "Actually no, I just send you a text, didn't you read it?" He asked feeling insulted but continued when saw Jake's face. "Ok, she and Terry are still working on that case but (Y/N) got hot, she said she needed some air. She's on the roof." 

 "Hot? (Y/N) is always cold." He said confused but suddenly something clicked and everything started to fall into place inside his head. "I got go."

 His steps were fast to open the door for the roof and he immediately spotted you looking at the city view. You didn't turn but he knew that you knew it was him. 

 "Hey you." He said softly slowly approaching you until he was by your side. "I was worried today, you know?" 

 "I kind of got that.... Charles followed me into the ladies bathroom three times." You said making you both laugh. "So what it was? Like a secret case that everybody worked? How was it called? '(Y/N)'s secret 0.1?'"

 "What? No. I wouldn't go that obvious." Jake answered laughing nervously. Oh man, you knew him too damn well. "But yeah, was definitely working on that case. I worry about (Y/N). You were pushing me away, you didn't even answered my calls this last weekend. Sure, you could be done with our casual thing or whatever, but I know you. I knew it was not it." 

 "Jake, look..." You said with a sigh but he interrupted you. 

 "I was confused as hell this morning, but suddenly everything clicked. Yesterday you didn't want that weird salmon cookies Charles brings. I adore you but those are nasty as fuck, by the way. You didn't drink coffee when you got here today, you always do that. And not greeting anyone? That means something happened yesterday night that got you worried." Jake said and paused waiting for a reaction, but he took your silence a sign to continue his deduction. "Of course you could be suspecting for a while now, and that's why you have been avoiding me. Captain saw your purse when he got out of his office. He saw your tampons, am I right? Untouched. Your usual period date has already passed, and everybody knows when it is because of how much pain you feel. Usually stays only in paper work those days. Constantly needing to pee. But none of it hit me until Charles said you were feeling hot. You're always cold and asks for my jackets. Those are all symptoms of...." 

 "Hit me Sherlock." You said and waited for his right answer.

 "You're pregnant." Jake said finally, his face softening. "It is mine?" He asks feeling insecure but he changed his mind when saw your face. "Dumb question. Shouldn't say that. Of course it's mine."

 "I'm so sorry Jake, I just didn't know how to say it. You're right in everything, I started suspecting since last Friday but only took the test yesterday." You said starting to feel tears in your eyes. "And yes, Captain Holt found out in seconds. I just begged him not to tell you."

 "Traitor" Jake said furrowing his eyebrows. "I'm just confused on how that happened? We always use condoms." 

 "I was thinking that too, until I remembered that night on Gina's birthday that we got really drunk and had sex on the bar's bathroom." You said and he agreed, both smiling at the memory quickly coming back to the moment. "I am so scared. We're not even together and I..." 

 "Wait, that's what is troubling you?" Jake said feeling his hands shaking and his heart beating incredibly fast. "(Y/N) I like you ok? For a long time now. I just didn't think you were ready yet for a relationship, I was respecting your time. But oh god, I'm so in love with you it hurts. Of course it's not the perfect scenario, but we gonna make this work, I won't leave you to take care of this baby alone."

 He said sincerely looking in your eyes and you nodded feeling some tears starting to fall down, you hugged him tight feeling his strong grip on you. Jake kissed your forehead, rubbing your back to calm you down. 

 "I'm in love with you too Jake, so much, I want this to work out." You said softly into his neck. 

 "It will." He said giving a slow chaste kiss. You stayed hugged for a few minutes but suddenly he gasped and started to hyperventilate. "Holy shit! I'm going to be a dad. What if i can not be a good dad because mine abandoned me when I was little? I'm going to be a dad." 

 "Hey" You said to drag his attention back to you, watching his wide eyes staring at the horizon. You knew it was your time to calm him down. "You're going to be a great dad. You are already proving this to me by not letting me be alone. We will work this out remember?" 

 "Yeah..." He sighed feeling calmer looking into your eyes. "We will work this out."

[innuendostudios]

Thoughts on: Criterion's Neo-Noir Collection

I have written up all 26 films* in the Criterion Channel's Neo-Noir Collection.

Legend: rw - rewatch; a movie I had seen before going through the collection dnrw - did not rewatch; if a movie met two criteria (a. I had seen it within the last 18 months, b. I actively dislike it) I wrote it up from memory.

* in September, Brick leaves the Criterion Channel and is replaced in the collection with Michael Mann's Thief. May add it to the list when that happens.

Note: These are very "what was on my mind after watching." No effort has been made to avoid spoilers, nor to make the plot clear for anyone who hasn't seen the movies in question. Decide for yourself if that's interesting to you.

Cotton Comes to Harlem I feel utterly unequipped to asses this movie. This and Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song the following year are regularly cited as the progenitors of the blaxploitation genre. (This is arguably unfair, since both were made by Black men and dealt much more substantively with race than the white-directed films that followed them.) Its heroes are a couple of Black cops who are treated with suspicion both by their white colleagues and by the Black community they're meant to police. I'm not 100% clear on whether they're the good guys? I mean, I think they are. But the community's suspicion of them seems, I dunno... well-founded? They are working for The Man. And there's interesting discussion to the had there - is the the problem that the law is carried out by racists, or is the law itself racist? Can Black cops make anything better? But it feels like the film stacks the deck in Gravedigger and Coffin Ed's favor; the local Black church is run by a conman, the Back-to-Africa movement is, itself, a con, and the local Black Power movement is treated as an obstacle. Black cops really are the only force for justice here. Movie portrays Harlem itself as a warm, thriving, cultured community, but the people that make up that community are disloyal and easily fooled. Felt, to me, like the message was "just because they're cops doesn't mean they don't have Black soul," which, nowadays, we would call copaganda. But, then, do I know what I'm talking about? Do I know how much this played into or off of or against stereotypes from 1970? Was this a radical departure I don't have the context to appreciate? Is there substance I'm too white and too many decades removed to pick up on? Am I wildly overthinking this? I dunno. Seems like everyone involved was having a lot of fun, at least. That bit is contagious.

Across 110th Street And here's the other side of the "race film" equation. Another movie set in Harlem with a Black cop pulled between the police, the criminals, and the public, but this time the film is made by white people. I like it both more and less. Pro: this time the difficult position of Black cop who's treated with suspicion by both white cops and Black Harlemites is interrogated. Con: the Black cop has basically no personality other than "honest cop." Pro: the racism of the police force is explicit and systemic, as opposed to comically ineffectual. Con: the movie is shaped around a racist white cop who beats the shit out of Black people but slowly forms a bond with his Black partner. Pro: the Black criminal at the heart of the movie talks openly about how the white world has stacked the deck against him, and he's soulful and relateable. Con: so of course he dies in the end, because the only way privileged people know to sympathetize with minorities is to make them tragic (see also: The Boys in the Band, Philadelphia, and Brokeback Mountain for gay men). Additional con: this time Harlem is portrayed as a hellhole. Barely any of the community is even seen. At least the shot at the end, where the criminal realizes he's going to die and throws the bag of money off a roof and into a playground so the Black kids can pick it up before the cops reclaim it was powerful. But overall... yech. Cotton Comes to Harlem felt like it wasn't for me; this feels like it was 100% for me and I respect it less for that.

The Long Goodbye (rw) The shaggiest dog. Like much Altman, more compelling than good, but very compelling. Raymond Chandler's story is now set in the 1970's, but Philip Marlowe is the same Philip Marlowe of the 1930's. I get the sense there was always something inherently sad about Marlowe. Classic noir always portrayed its detectives as strong-willed men living on the border between the straightlaced world and its seedy underbelly, crossing back and forth freely but belonging to neither. But Chandler stresses the loneliness of it - or, at least, the people who've adapted Chandler do. Marlowe is a decent man in an indecent world, sorting things out, refusing to profit from misery, but unable to set anything truly right. Being a man out of step is here literalized by putting him forty years from the era where he belongs. His hardboiled internal monologue is now the incessant mutterings of the weird guy across the street who never stops smoking. Like I said: compelling! Kael's observation was spot on: everyone in the movie knows more about the mystery than he does, but he's the only one who cares. The mystery is pretty threadbare - Marlowe doesn't detect so much as end up in places and have people explain things to him. But I've seen it two or three times now, and it does linger.

Chinatown (rw) I confess I've always been impressed by Chinatown more than I've liked it. Its story structure is impeccable, its atmosphere is gorgeous, its noirish fatalism is raw and real, its deconstruction of the noir hero is well-observed, and it's full of clever detective tricks (the pocket watches, the tail light, the ruler). I've just never connected with it. Maybe it's a little too perfectly crafted. (I feel similar about Miller's Crossing.) And I've always been ambivalent about the ending. In Towne's original ending, Evelyn shoots Noah Cross dead and get arrested, and neither she nor Jake can tell the truth of why she did it, so she goes to jail for murder and her daughter is in the wind. Polansky proposed the ending that exists now, where Evelyn just dies, Cross wins, and Jake walks away devastated. It communicates the same thing: Jake's attempt to get smart and play all the sides off each other instead of just helping Evelyn escape blows up in his face at the expense of the woman he cares about and any sense of real justice. And it does this more dramatically and efficiently than Towne's original ending. But it also treats Evelyn as narratively disposable, and hands the daughter over to the man who raped Evelyn and murdered her husband. It makes the women suffer more to punch up the ending. But can I honestly say that Towne's ending is the better one? It is thematically equal, dramatically inferior, but would distract me less. Not sure what the calculus comes out to there. Maybe there should be a third option. Anyway! A perfect little contraption. Belongs under a glass dome.

Night Moves (rw) Ah yeah, the good shit. This is my quintessential 70's noir. This is three movies in a row about detectives. Thing is, the classic era wasn't as chockablock with hardboiled detectives as we think; most of those movies starred criminals, cops, and boring dudes seduced to the darkness by a pair of legs. Gumshoes just left the strongest impressions. (The genre is said to begin with Maltese Falcon and end with Touch of Evil, after all.) So when the post-Code 70's decided to pick the genre back up while picking it apart, it makes sense that they went for the 'tecs first. The Long Goodbye dragged the 30's detective into the 70's, and Chinatown went back to the 30's with a 70's sensibility. But Night Moves was about detecting in the Watergate era, and how that changed the archetype. Harry Moseby is the detective so obsessed with finding the truth that he might just ruin his life looking for it, like the straight story will somehow fix everything that's broken, like it'll bring back a murdered teenager and repair his marriage and give him a reason to forgive the woman who fucked him just to distract him from some smuggling. When he's got time to kill, he takes out a little, magnetic chess set and recreates a famous old game, where three knight moves (get it?) would have led to a beautiful checkmate had the player just seen it. He keeps going, self-destructing, because he can't stand the idea that the perfect move is there if he can just find it. And, no matter how much we see it destroy him, we, the audience, want him to keep going; we expect a satisfying resolution to the mystery. That's what we need from a detective picture; one character flat-out compares Harry to Sam Spade. But what if the truth is just... Watergate? Just some prick ruining things for selfish reasons? Nothing grand, nothing satisfying. Nothing could be more noir, or more neo-, than that.

Farewell, My Lovely Sometimes the only thing that makes a noir neo- is that it's in color and all the blood, tits, and racism from the books they're based on get put back in. This second stab at Chandler is competant but not much more than that. Mitchum works as Philip Marlowe, but Chandler's dialogue feels off here, like lines that worked on the page don't work aloud, even though they did when Bogie said them. I'll chalk it up to workmanlike but uninspired direction. (Dang this looks bland so soon after Chinatown.) Moose Malloy is a great character, and perfectly cast. (Wasn't sure at first, but it's true.) Some other interesting cats show up and vanish - the tough brothel madam based on Brenda Allen comes to mind, though she's treated with oddly more disdain than most of the other hoods and is dispatched quicker. In general, the more overt racism and misogyny doesn't seem to do anything except make the movie "edgier" than earlier attempts at the same material, and it reads kinda try-hard. But it mostly holds together. *shrug*

The Killing of a Chinese Bookie (dnrw) Didn't care for this at all. Can't tell if the script was treated as a jumping-off point or if the dialogue is 100% improvised, but it just drags on forever and is never that interesting. Keeps treating us to scenes from the strip club like they're the opera scenes in Amadeus, and, whatever, I don't expect burlesque to be Mozart, but Cosmo keeps saying they're an artful, classy joint, and I keep waiting for the show to be more than cheap, lazy camp. How do you make gratuitious nudity boring? Mind you, none of this is bad as a rule - I love digressions and can enjoy good sleaze, and it's clear the filmmakers care about what they're making. They just did not sell it in a way I wanted to buy. Can't remember what edit I watched; I hope it was the 135 minute one, because I cannot imagine there being a longer edit out there.

The American Friend (dnrw) It's weird that this is Patricia Highsmith, right? That Dennis Hopper is playing Tom Ripley? In a cowboy hat? I gather that Minghella's version wasn't true to the source, but I do love that movie, and this is a long, long way from that. This Mr. Ripley isn't even particularly talented! Anyway, this has one really great sequence, where a regular guy has been coerced by crooks into murdering someone on a train platform, and, when the moment comes to shoot, he doesn't. And what follows is a prolonged sequence of an amateur trying to surreptitiously tail a guy across a train station and onto another train, and all the while you're not sure... is he going to do it? is he going to chicken out? is he going to do it so badly he gets caught? It's hard not to put yourself in the protagonist's shoes, wondering how you would handle the situation, whether you could do it, whether you could act on impulse before your conscience could catch up with you. It drags on a long while and this time it's a good thing. Didn't much like the rest of the movie, it's shapeless and often kind of corny, and the central plot hook is contrived. (It's also very weird that this is the only Wim Wenders I've seen.) But, hey, I got one excellent sequence, not gonna complain.

The Big Sleep Unlike the 1946 film, I can follow the plot of this Big Sleep. But, also unlike the 1946 version, this one isn't any damn fun. Mitchum is back as Marlowe (this is three Marlowes in five years, btw), and this time it's set in the 70's and in England, for some reason. I don't find this offensive, but neither do I see what it accomplishes? Most of the cast is still American. (Hi Jimmy!) Still holds together, but even less well than Farewell, My Lovely. But I do find it interesting that the neo-noir era keeps returning to Chandler while it's pretty much left Hammet behind (inasmuch as someone whose genes are spread wide through the whole genre can be left behind). Spade and the Continental Op, straightshooting tough guys who come out on top in the end, seem antiquated in the (post-)modern era. But Marlowe's goodness being out of sync with the world around him only seems more poignant the further you take him from his own time. Nowadays you can really only do Hammett as pastiche, but I sense that you could still play Chandler straight.

Eyes of Laura Mars The most De Palma movie I've seen not made by De Palma, complete with POV shots, paranormal hoodoo, and fixation with sex, death, and whether images of such are art or exploitation (or both). Laura Mars takes photographs of naked women in violent tableux, and has gotten quite famous doing so, but is it damaging to women? The movie has more than a superficial engagement with this topic, but only slightly more than superficial. Kept imagining a movie that is about 30% less serial killer story and 30% more art conversations. (But, then, I have an art degree and have never murdered anyone, so.) Like, museums are full of Biblical paintings full of nude women and slaughter, sometimes both at once, and they're called masterpieces. Most all of them were painted by men on commission from other men. Now Laura Mars makes similar images in modern trappings, and has models made of flesh and blood rather than paint, and it's scandalous? Why is it only controversial once women are getting paid for it? On the other hand, is this just the master's tools? Is she subverting or challenging the male gaze, or just profiting off of it? Or is a woman profiting off of it, itself, a subversion? Is it subversive enough to account for how it commodifies female bodies? These questions are pretty clearly relevant to the movie itself, and the movies in general, especially after the fall of the Hays Code when people were really unrestrained with the blood and boobies. And, heck, the lead is played by the star of Bonnie and Clyde! All this is to say: I wish the movie were as interested in these questions as I am. What's there is a mildly diverting B-picture. There's one great bit where Laura's seeing through the killer's eyes (that's the hook, she gets visions from the murderer's POV; no, this is never explained) and he's RIGHT BEHIND HER, so there's a chase where she charges across an empty room only able to see her own fleeing self from ten feet behind. That was pretty great! And her first kiss with the detective (because you could see a mile away that the detective and the woman he's supposed to protect are gonna fall in love) is immediately followed by the two freaking out about how nonsensical it is for them to fall in love with each other, because she's literally mourning multiple deaths and he's being wildly unprofessional, and then they go back to making out. That bit was great, too. The rest... enh.

The Onion Field What starts off as a seemingly not-that-noirish cops-vs-crooks procedural turns into an agonizingly protracted look at the legal system, with the ultimate argument that the very idea of the law ever resulting in justice is a lie. Hoo! I have to say, I'm impressed. There's a scene where a lawyer - whom I'm not sure is even named, he's like the seventh of thirteen we've met - literally quits the law over how long this court case about two guys shooting a cop has taken. He says the cop who was murdered has been forgotten, his partner has never gotten to move on because the case has lasted eight years, nothing has been accomplished, and they should let the two criminals walk and jail all the judges and lawyers instead. It's awesome! The script is loaded with digressions and unnecessary details, just the way I like it. Can't say I'm impressed with the execution. Nothing is wrong, exactly, but the performances all seem a tad melodramatic or a tad uninspired. Camerawork is, again, purely functional. It's no masterpiece. But that second half worked for me. (And it's Ted Danson's first movie! He did great.)

Body Heat (rw) Let's say up front that this is a handsomely-made movie. Probably the best looking thing on the list since Night Moves. Nothing I've seen better captures the swelter of an East Coast heatwave, or the lusty feeling of being too hot to bang and going at it regardless. Kathleen Turner sells the hell out of a femme fatale. There are a lot of good lines and good performances (Ted Danson is back and having the time of his life). I want to get all that out of the way, because this is a movie heavily modeled after Double Indemnity, and I wanted to discuss its merits before I get into why inviting that comparison doesn't help the movie out. In a lot of ways, it's the same rules as the Robert Mitchum Marlowe movies - do Double Indemnity but amp up the sex and violence. And, to a degree it works. (At least, the sex does, dunno that Double Indemnity was crying out for explosions.) But the plot is amped as well, and gets downright silly. Yeah, Mrs. Dietrichson seduces Walter Neff so he'll off her husband, but Neff clocks that pretty early and goes along with it anyway. Everything beyond that is two people keeping too big a secret and slowly turning on each other. But here? For the twists to work Matty has to be, from frame one, playing four-dimensional chess on the order of Senator Palpatine, and its about as plausible. (Exactly how did she know, after she rebuffed Ned, he would figure out her local bar and go looking for her at the exact hour she was there?) It's already kind of weird to be using the spider woman trope in 1981, but to make her MORE sexually conniving and mercenary than she was in the 40's is... not great. As lurid trash, it's pretty fun for a while, but some noir stuff can't just be updated, it needs to be subverted or it doesn't justify its existence.

Blow Out Brian De Palma has two categories of movie: he's got his mainstream, director-for-hire fare, where his voice is either reigned in or indulged in isolated sequences that don't always jive with the rest fo the film, and then there's his Brian De Palma movies. My mistake, it seems, is having seen several for-hires from throughout his career - The Untouchables (fine enough), Carlito's Way (ditto, but less), Mission: Impossible (enh) - but had only seen De Palma-ass movies from his late period (Femme Fatale and The Black Dahlia, both of which I think are garbage). All this to say: Blow Out was my first classic-era De Palma, and holy fucking shit dudes. This was (with caveats) my absolute and entire jam. I said I could enjoy good sleaze, and this is good friggin' sleaze. (Though far short of De Palma at his sleaziest, mercifully.) The splitscreens, the diopter shots, the canted angles, how does he make so many shlocky things work?! John Travolta's sound tech goes out to get fresh wind fx for the movie he's working on, and we get this wonderful sequence of visuals following sounds as he turns his attention and his microphone to various noises - a couple on a walk, a frog, an owl, a buzzing street lamp. Later, as he listens back to the footage, the same sequence plays again, but this time from his POV; we're seeing his memory as guided by the same sequence of sounds, now recreated with different shots, as he moves his pencil in the air mimicking the microphone. When he mixes and edits sounds, we hear the literal soundtrack of the movie we are watching get mixed and edited by the person on screen. And as he tries to unravel a murder mystery, he uses what's at hand: magnetic tape, flatbed editors, an animation camera to turn still photos from the crime scene into a film and sync it with the audio he recorded; it's forensics using only the tools of the editing room. As someone who's spent some time in college editing rooms, this is a hoot and a half. Loses a bit of steam as it goes on and the film nerd stuff gives way to a more traditional thriller, but rallies for a sound-tech-centered final setpiece, which steadily builds to such madcap heights you can feel the air thinning, before oddly cutting its own tension and then trying to build it back up again. It doesn't work as well the second time. But then, that shot right after the climax? Damn. Conflicted on how the movie treats the female lead. I get why feminist film theorists are so divided on De Palma. His stuff is full of things feminists (rightly) criticize, full of women getting naked when they're not getting stabbed, but he also clearly finds women fascinating and has them do empowered and unexpected things, and there are many feminist reads of his movies. Call it a mixed bag. But even when he's doing tropey shit, he explores the tropes in unexpected ways. Definitely the best movie so far that I hadn't already seen.

Cutter's Way (rw) Alex Cutter is pitched to us as an obnoxious-but-sympathetic son of a bitch, and, you know, two out of three ain't bad. Watched this during my 2020 neo-noir kick and considered skipping it this time because I really didn't enjoy it. Found it a little more compelling this go around, while being reminded of why my feelings were room temp before. Thematically, I'm onboard: it's about a guy, Cutter, getting it in his head that he's found a murderer and needs to bring him to justice, and his friend, Bone, who intermittently helps him because he feels bad that Cutter lost his arm, leg, and eye in Nam and he also feels guilty for being in love with Cutter's wife. The question of whether the guy they're trying to bring down actually did it is intentionally undefined, and arguably unimportant; they've got personal reasons to see this through. Postmodern and noirish, fixated with the inability to ever fully know the truth of anything, but starring people so broken by society that they're desperate for certainty. (Pretty obvious parallels to Vietnam.) Cutter's a drunk and kind of an asshole, but understandably so. Bone's shiftlessness is the other response to a lack of meaning in the world, to the point where making a decision, any decision, feels like character growth, even if it's maybe killing a guy whose guilt is entirely theoretical. So, yeah, I'm down with all of this! A- in outline form. It's just that Cutter is so uninterestingly unpleasant and no one else on screen is compelling enough to make up for it. His drunken windups are tedious and his sanctimonious speeches about what the war was like are, well, true and accurate but also obviously manipulative. It's two hours with two miserable people, and I think Cutter's constant chatter is supposed to be the comic relief but it's a little too accurate to drunken rambling, which isn't funny if you're not also drunk. He's just tedious, irritating, and periodically racist. Pass.

Blood Simple (rw) I'm pretty cool on the Coens - there are things I've liked, even loved, in every Coen film I've seen, but I always come away dissatisfied. For a while, I kept going to their movies because I was sure eventually I'd love one without qualification. No Country for Old Men came close, the first two acts being master classes in sustained tension. But then the third act is all about denying closure: the protagonist is murdered offscreen, the villain's motives are never explained, and it ends with an existentialist speech about the unfathomable cruelty of the world. And it just doesn't land for me. The archness of the Coen's dialogue, the fussiness of their set design, the kinda-intimate, kinda-awkward, kinda-funny closeness of the camera's singles, it cannot sell me on a devastating meditation about meaninglessness. It's only ever sold me on the Coens' own cleverness. And that archness, that distancing, has typified every one of their movies I've come close to loving. Which is a long-ass preamble to saying, holy heck, I was not prepared for their very first movie to be the one I'd been looking for! I watched it last year and it remains true on rewatch: Blood Simple works like gangbusters. It's kind of Double Indemnity (again) but played as a comedy of errors, minus the comedy: two people romantically involved feeling their trust unravel after a murder. And I think the first thing that works for me is that utter lack of comedy. It's loaded with the Coens' trademark ironies - mostly dramatic in this case - but it's all played straight. Unlike the usual lead/femme fatale relationship, where distrust brews as the movie goes on, the audience knows the two main characters can trust each other. There are no secret duplicitous motives waiting to be revealed. The audience also know why they don't trust each other. (And it's all communicated wordlessly, btw: a character enters a scene and we know, based on the information that character has, how it looks to them and what suspicions it would arouse, even as we know the truth of it). The second thing that works is, weirdly, that the characters aren't very interesting?! Ray and Abby have almost no characterization. Outside of a general likability, they are blank slates. This is a weakness in most films, but, given the agonizingly long, wordless sequences where they dispose of bodies or hide from gunfire, you're left thinking not "what will Ray/Abby do in this scenario," because Ray and Abby are relatively elemental and undefined, but "what would I do in this scenario?" Which creates an exquisite tension but also, weirdly, creates more empathy than I feel for the Coens' usual cast of personalities. It's supposed to work the other way around! Truly enjoyable throughout but absolutely wonderful in the suspenseful-as-hell climax. Good shit right here.

Body Double The thing about erotic thrillers is everything that matters is in the name. Is it thrilling? Is it erotic? Good; all else is secondary. De Palma set out to make the most lurid, voyeuristic, horny, violent, shocking, steamy movie he could come up with, and its success was not strictly dependent on the lead's acting ability or the verisimilitude of the plot. But what are we, the modern audience, to make of it once 37 years have passed and, by today's standards, the eroticism is quite tame and the twists are no longer shocking? Then we're left with a nonsensical riff on Vertigo, a specularization of women that is very hard to justify, and lead actor made of pulped wood. De Palma's obsessions don't cohere into anything more this time; the bits stolen from Hitchcock aren't repurposed to new ends, it really is just Hitch with more tits and less brains. (I mean, I still haven't seen Vertigo, but I feel 100% confident in that statement.) The diopter shots and rear-projections this time look cheap (literally so, apparently; this had 1/3 the budget of Blow Out). There are some mildly interesting setpieces, but nothing compared to Travolta's auditory reconstructions or car chase where he tries to tail a subway train from street level even if it means driving through a frickin parade like an inverted French Connection, goddamn Blow Out was a good movie! Anyway. Melanie Griffith seems to be having fun, at least. I guess I had a little as well, but it was, at best, diverting, and a real letdown.

The Hit Surprised by how much I enjoyed this one. Terrance Stamp flips on the mob and spends ten years living a life of ease in Spain, waiting for the day they find and kill him. Movie kicks off when they do find him, and what follows is a ramshackle road movie as John Hurt and a young Tim Roth attempt to drive him to Paris so they can shoot him in front of his old boss. Stamp is magnetic. He's spent a decade reading philosophy and seems utterly prepared for death, so he spends the trip humming, philosophizing, and being friendly with his captors when he's not winding them up. It remains unclear to the end whether the discord he sews between Roth and Hurt is part of some larger plan of escape or just for shits and giggles. There's also a decent amount of plot for a movie that's not terribly plot-driven - just about every part of the kidnapping has tiny hitches the kidnappers aren't prepared for, and each has film-long repercussions, drawing the cops closer and somehow sticking Laura del Sol in their backseat. The ongoing questions are when Stamp will die, whether del Sol will die, and whether Roth will be able to pull the trigger. In the end, it's actually a meditation on ethics and mortality, but in a quiet and often funny way. It's not going to go down as one of my new favs, but it was a nice way to spend a couple hours.

Trouble in Mind (dnrw) I fucking hated this movie. It's been many months since I watched it, do I remember what I hated most? Was it the bit where a couple of country bumpkins who've come to the city walk into a diner and Mr. Bumpkin clocks that the one Black guy in the back as obviously a criminal despite never having seen him before? Was it the part where Kris Kristofferson won't stop hounding Mrs. Bumpkin no matter how many times she demands to be left alone, and it's played as romantic because obviously he knows what she needs better than she does? Or is it the part where Mr. Bumpkin reluctantly takes a job from the Obvious Criminal (who is, in fact, a criminal, and the only named Black character in the movie if I remember correctly, draw your own conclusions) and, within a week, has become a full-blown hood, which is exemplified by a lot, like, a lot of queer-coding? The answer to all three questions is yes. It's also fucking boring. Even out-of-drag Divine's performance as the villain can't save it.

Manhunter 'sfine? I've still never seen Silence of the Lambs, nor any of the Hopkins Lecter movies, nor, indeed, any full episode of the show. So the unheimlich others get seeing Brian Cox play Hannibal didn't come into play. Cox does a good job with him, but he's barely there. Shame, cuz he's the most interesting part of the movie. Honestly, there's a lot of interesting stuff that's barely there. Will Graham being a guy who gets into the heads of serial killers is explored well enough, and Mann knows how to direct a police procedural such that it's both contemplative and propulsive. But all the other themes it points at? Will's fear that he understands murderers a little too well? Hannibal trying to nudge him towards becoming one? Whatever dance Hannibal and Tooth Fairy are doing? What Tooth Fairy's deal is, anyway? (Why does he wear fake teeth and bite things? Why is he fixated on the red dragon? Does the bit where he says "Francis is gone forever" mean he has DID?) None of it goes anywhere or amounts to anything. I mean, it's certainly more interesting with this stuff than without, but it has that feel of a book that's been pared of its interesting bits to fit the runtime (or, alternately, pulp that's been sloppily elevated). I still haven't made my mind up on Mann's cold, precise camera work, but at least it gives me something to look at. It's fine! This is fine.

Mona Lisa (rw) Gave this one another shot. Bob Hoskins is wonderful as a hood out of his depth in classy places, quick to anger but just as quick to let anger go (the opening sequence where he's screaming on his ex-wife's doorstep, hurling trash cans at her house, and one minute later thrilled to see his old car, is pretty nice). And Cathy Tyson's working girl is a subtler kind of fascinating, exuding a mixture of coldness and kindness. It's just... this is ultimately a story about how heartbreaking it is when the girl you like is gay, right? It's Weezer's Pink Triangle: The Movie. It's not homophobic, exactly - Simone isn't demonized for being a lesbian - but it's still, like, "man, this straight white guy's pain is so much more interesting than the Black queer sex worker's." And when he's yelling "you woulda done it!" at the end, I can't tell if we're supposed to agree with him. Seems pretty clear that she wouldn'ta done it, at least not without there being some reveal about her character that doesn't happen, but I don't think the ending works if we don't agree with him, so... I'm like 70% sure the movie does Simone dirty there. For the first half, their growing relationship feels genuine and natural, and, honestly, the story being about a real bond that unfortunately means different things to each party could work if it didn't end with a gun and a sock in the jaw. Shape feels jagged as well; what feels like the end of the second act or so turns out to be the climax. And some of the symbolism is... well, ok, Simone gives George money to buy more appropriate clothes for hanging out in high end hotels, and he gets a tan leather jacket and a Hawaiian shirt, and their first proper bonding moment is when she takes him out for actual clothes. For the rest of the movie he is rocking double-breasted suits (not sure I agree with the striped tie, but it was the eighties, whaddya gonna do?). Then, in the second half, she sends him off looking for her old streetwalker friend, and now he looks completely out of place in the strip clubs and bordellos. So far so good. But then they have this run-in where her old pimp pulls a knife and cuts George's arm, so, with his nice shirt torn and it not safe going home (I guess?) he starts wearing the Hawaiian shirt again. So around the time he's starting to realize he doesn't really belong in Simone's world or the lowlife world he came from anymore, he's running around with the classy double-breasted suit jacket over the garish Hawaiian shirt, and, yeah, bit on the nose guys. Anyway, it has good bits, I just feel like a movie that asks me to feel for the guy punching a gay, Black woman in the face needs to work harder to earn it. Bit of wasted talent.

The Bedroom Window Starts well. Man starts an affair with his boss' wife, their first night together she witnesses an attempted murder from his window, she worries going to the police will reveal the affair to her husband, so the man reports her testimony to the cops claiming he's the one who saw it. Young Isabelle Huppert is the perfect woman for a guy to risk his career on a crush over, and Young Steve Guttenberg is the perfect balance of affability and amorality. And it flows great - picks just the right media to res. So then he's talking to the cops, telling them what she told him, and they ask questions he forgot to ask her - was the perp's jacket a blazer or a windbreaker? - and he has to guess. Then he gets called into the police lineup, and one guy matches her description really well, but is it just because he's wearing his red hair the way she described it? He can't be sure, doesn't finger any of them. He finds out the cops were pretty certain about one of the guys, so he follows the one he thinks it was around, looking for more evidence, and another girl is attacked right outside a bar he knows the redhead was at. Now he's certain! But he shows the boss' wife the guy and she's not certain, and she reminds him they don't even know if the guy he followed is the same guy the police suspected! And as he feeds more evidence to the cops, he has to lie more, because he can't exactly say he was tailing the guy around the city. So, I'm all in now. Maybe it's because I'd so recently rewatched Night Moves and Cutter's Way, but this seems like another story about uncertainty. He's really certain about the guy because it fits narratively, and we, the audience, feel the same. But he's not actually a witness, he doesn't have actual evidence, he's fitting bits and pieces together like a conspiracy theorist. He's fixating on what he wants to be true. Sign me up! But then it turns out he's 100% correct about who the killer is but his lies are found out and now the cops think he's the killer and I realize, oh, no, this movie isn't nearly as smart as I thought it was. Egg on my face! What transpires for the remaining half of the runtime is goofy as hell, and someone with shlockier sensibilities could have made a meal of it, but Hanson, despite being a Corman protege, takes this silliness seriously in the all wrong ways. Next!

Homicide (rw? I think I saw most of this on TV one time) Homicide centers around the conflicted loyalties of a Jewish cop. It opens with the Jewish cop and his white gentile partner taking over a case with a Black perp from some Black FBI agents. The media is making a big thing about the racial implications of the mostly white cops chasing down a Black man in a Black neighborhood. And inside of 15 minutes the FBI agent is calling the lead a k*ke and the gentile cop is calling the FBI agent a f****t and there's all kinds of invective for Black people. The film is announcing its intentions out the gate: this movie is about race. But the issue here is David Mamet doesn't care about race as anything other than a dramatic device. He's the Ubisoft of filmmakers, having no coherent perspective on social issues but expecting accolades for even bringing them up. Mamet is Jewish (though lead actor Joe Mantegna definitely is not) but what is his position on the Jewish diaspora? The whole deal is Mantegna gets stuck with a petty homicide case instead of the big one they just pinched from the Feds, where a Jewish candy shop owner gets shot in what looks like a stickup. Her family tries to appeal to his Jewishness to get him to take the case seriously, and, after giving them the brush-off for a long time, finally starts following through out of guilt, finding bits and pieces of what may or may not be a conspiracy, with Zionist gun runners and underground neo-Nazis. But, again: all of these are just dramatic devices. Mantegna's Jewishness (those words will never not sound ridiculous together) has always been a liability for him as a cop (we are told, not shown), and taking the case seriously is a reclamation of identity. The Jews he finds community with sold tommyguns to revolutionaries during the founding of Israel. These Jews end up blackmailing him to get a document from the evidence room. So: what is the film's position on placing stock in one's Jewish identity? What is its position on Israel? What is its opinion on Palestine? Because all three come up! And the answer is: Mamet doesn't care. You can read it a lot of different ways. Someone with more context and more patience than me could probably deduce what the de facto message is, the way Chris Franklin deduced the de facto message of Far Cry V despite the game's efforts not to have one, but I'm not going to. Mantegna's attempt to reconnect with his Jewishness gets his partner killed, gets the guy he was supposed to bring in alive shot dead, gets him possibly permanent injuries, gets him on camera blowing up a store that's a front for white nationalists, and all for nothing because the "clues" he found (pretty much exclusively by coincidence) were unconnected nothings. The problem is either his Jewishness, or his lifelong failure to connect with his Jewishness until late in life. Mamet doesn't give a shit. (Like, Mamet canonically doesn't give a shit: he is on record saying social context is meaningless, characters only exist to serve the plot, and there are no deeper meanings in fiction.) Mamet's ping-pong dialogue is fun, as always, and there are some neat ideas and characters, but it's all in service of a big nothing that needed to be a something to work.

Swoon So much I could talk about, let's keep it to the most interesting bits. Hommes Fatales: a thing about classic noir that it was fascinated by the marginal but had to keep it in the margins. Liberated women, queer-coded killers, Black jazz players, broke thieves; they were the main event, they were what audiences wanted to see, they were what made the movies fun. But the ending always had to reassert straightlaced straight, white, middle-class male society as unshakeable. White supremacist capitalist patriarchy demanded, both ideologically and via the Hays Code, that anyone outside these norms be punished, reformed, or dead by the movie's end. The only way to make them the heroes was to play their deaths for tragedy. It is unsurprising that neo-noir would take the queer-coded villains and make them the protagonists. Implicature: This is the story of Leopold and Loeb, murderers famous for being queer, and what's interesting is how the queerness in the first half exists entirely outside of language. Like, it's kind of amazing for a movie from 1992 to be this gay - we watch Nathan and Dickie kiss, undress, masturbate, fuck; hell, they wear wedding rings when they're alone together. But it's never verbalized. Sex is referred to as "your reward" or "what you wanted" or "best time." Dickie says he's going to have "the girls over," and it turns out "the girls" are a bunch of drag queens, but this is never acknowledged. Nathan at one point lists off a bunch of famous men - Oscar Wild, E.M. Forster, Frederick the Great - but, though the commonality between them is obvious (they were all gay), it's left the the audience to recognize it. When their queerness is finally verbalized in the second half, it's first in the language of pathology - a psychiatrist describing their "perversions" and "misuse" of their "organs" before the court, which has to be cleared of women because it's so inappropriate - and then with slurs from the man who murders Dickie in jail (a murder which is written off with no investigation because the victim is a gay prisoner instead of a L&L's victim, a child of a wealthy family). I don't know if I'd have noticed this if I hadn't read Chip Delany describing his experience as a gay man in the 50's existing almost entirely outside of language, the only language at the time being that of heteronormativity. Murder as Love Story: L&L exchange sex as payment for the other commiting crimes; it's foreplay. Their statements to the police where they disagree over who's to blame is a lover's quarrel. Their sentencing is a marriage. Nathan performs his own funeral rites over Dickie's body after he dies on the operating table. They are, in their way, together til death did they part. This is the relationship they can have. That it does all this without romanticizing the murder itself or valorizing L&L as humans is frankly incredible.

Suture (rw) The pitch: at the funeral for his father, wealthy Vincent Towers meets his long lost half brother Clay Arlington. It is implied Clay is a child from out of wedlock, possibly an affair; no one knows Vincent has a half-brother but him and Clay. Vincent invites Clay out to his fancy-ass home in Arizona. Thing is, Vincent is suspected (correctly) by the police of having murdered his father, and, due to a striking family resemblence, he's brought Clay to his home to fake his own death. He finagles Clay into wearing his clothes and driving his car, and then blows the car up and flees the state, leaving the cops to think him dead. Thing is, Clay survives, but with amnesia. The doctors tell him he's Vincent, and he has no reason to disagree. Any discrepancy in the way he looks is dismissed as the result of reconstructive surgery after the explosion. So Clay Arlington resumes Vincent Towers' life, without knowing Clay Arlington even exists. The twist: Clay and Vincent are both white, but Vincent is played by Michael Harris, a white actor, and Clay is played by Dennis Haysbert, a Black actor. "Ian, if there's just the two of them, how do you know it's not Harris playing a Black character?" Glad you asked! It is most explicitly obvious during a scene where Vincent/Clay's surgeon-cum-girlfriend essentially bringing up phrenology to explain how Vincent/Clay couldn't possibly have murdered his father, describing straight hair, thin lips, and a Greco-Roman nose Haysbert very clearly doesn't have. But, let's be honest: we knew well beforehand that the rich-as-fuck asshole living in a huge, modern house and living it up in Arizona high society was white. Though Clay is, canonically, white, he lives an poor and underprivileged life common to Black men in America. Though the film's title officially refers to the many stitches holding Vincent/Clay's face together after the accident, "suture" is a film theory term, referring to the way a film audience gets wrapped up - sutured - in the world of the movie, choosing to forget the outside world and pretend the story is real. The usage is ironic, because the audience cannot be sutured in; we cannot, and are not expected to, suspend our disbelief that Clay is white. We are deliberately distanced. Consequently this is a movie to be thought about, not to to be felt. It has the shape of a Hitchcockian thriller but it can't evoke the emotions of one. You can see the scaffolding - "ah, yes, this is the part of a thriller where one man hides while another stalks him with a gun, clever." I feel ill-suited to comment on what the filmmakers are saying about race. I could venture a guess about the ending, where the psychiatrist, the only one who knows the truth about Clay, says he can never truly be happy living the lie of being Vincent Towers, while we see photographs of Clay/Vincent seemingly living an extremely happy life: society says white men simply belong at the top more than Black men do, but, if the roles could be reversed, the latter would slot in seamlessly. Maybe??? Of all the movies in this collection, this is the one I'd most want to read an essay on (followed by Swoon).

The Last Seduction (dnrw) No, no, no, I am not rewataching this piece of shit movie.

Brick (rw) Here's my weird contention: Brick is in color and in widescreen, but, besides that? There's nothing neo- about this noir. There's no swearing except "hell." (I always thought Tug said "goddamn" at one point but, no, he's calling The Pin "gothed-up.") There's a lot of discussion of sex, but always through implication, and the only deleted scene is the one that removed ambiguity about what Brendan and Laura get up to after kissing. There's nothing postmodern or subversive - yes, the hook is it's set in high school, but the big twist is that it takes this very seriously. It mines it for jokes, yes, but the drama is authentic. In fact, making the gumshoe a high school student, his jadedness an obvious front, still too young to be as hard as he tries to be, just makes the drama hit harder. Sam Spade if Sam Spade were allowed to cry. I've always found it an interesting counterpoint to The Good German, a movie that fastidiously mimics the aesthetics of classic noir - down to even using period-appropriate sound recording - but is wholly neo- in construction. Brick could get approved by the Hays Code. Its vibe, its plot about a detective playing a bunch of criminals against each other, even its slang ("bulls," "yegg," "flopped") are all taken directly from Hammett. It's not even stealing from noir, it's stealing from what noir stole from! It's a perfect curtain call for the collection: the final film is both the most contemporary and the most classic. It's also - but for the strong case you could make for Night Moves - the best movie on the list. It's even more appropriate for me, personally: this was where it all started for me and noir. I saw this in theaters when it came out and loved it. It was probably my favorite movie for some time. It gave me a taste for pulpy crime movies which I only, years later, realized were neo-noir. This is why I looked into Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang and In Bruges. I've seen it more times than any film on this list, by a factor of at least 3. It's why I will always adore Rian Johnson and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. It's the best-looking half-million-dollar movie I've ever seen. (Indie filmmakers, take fucking notes.) I even did a script analysis of this, and, yes, it follows the formula, but so tightly and with so much style. Did you notice that he says several of the sequence tensions out loud? ("I just want to find her." "Show of hands.") I notice new things each time I see it - this time it was how "brushing Brendan's hair out of his face" is Em's move, making him look more like he does in the flashback, and how Laura does the same to him as she's seducing him, in the moment when he misses Em the hardest. It isn't perfect. It's recreated noir so faithfully that the Innocent Girl dies, the Femme Fatale uses intimacy as a weapon, and none of the women ever appear in a scene together. 1940's gender politics maybe don't need to be revisited. They say be critical of the media you love, and it applies here most of all: it is a real criticism of something I love immensely.

[triplexdoublex]

Alpha Omega

Pairings: Colson x Reader

Warnings/Tags: alcohol, drunk, attempted rape (colson saves you before ANYTHING happens), potentially triggering dialogue about it the next morning, strangers to friends to lovers, smut, squirting 💦

A/N: Inspired by a weird dream I had and a real tweet I read, the person Jake in the fic was actually Jake Paul in my dream (ew). If you think the beginning backstory may trigger you and just want to read their friendship turn to lovers/smut, then scroll to the 2ND time skip marked with stars (***)

College mid-terms were finally over, which meant the same thing every year: the Alpha Omega annual fraternity party! It was the biggest party on campus every year, and even though it’s not really your scene, you decided to attend this year. Maybe it was the stress of mid-terms weighing extra heavy on your mind, but you needed an escape. But now, five full drinks and some shots later, you find yourself stumbling around the drink and keg area in the kitchen with a half-empty red solo cup, wondering how the hell you're supposed to find your way back to your dorm to sleep off what was obviously a very poor decision.

“Hey pretty thing,” you hear, suddenly feeling an arm slink around your waist.

“Do I know you?” you ask, disoriented and confused as your eyes try to focus on the face of the person touching you.

“The name’s Jake,” he shouts over the music, guiding you out of the kitchen and into the main party room. “You should come back to my room, you look like you need to lay down,” he says with ill-intent, but you’re too intoxicated to argue, letting him lead you up the stairs.

Even though most of your senses are impaired right now, you can’t mistake the distinct, pungent smell of weed wafting towards you as Jake escorts you down the hall once the two of you reach the top of the stairs.

“Yo, Jake!” a voice shouts from an open door, smoke billowing out as you pass.

“Hey Cols, what’s up?”

“Nothing much, man,” he says, blowing a smoke ring as he passes the blunt to his roommate Pete. “Wanna hit?”

“Maybe later, gotta get this pretty little thing back to room,” Jake answers.

“Aye, she alright? Colson questions, quickly rising to his feet.

“Yeah, pal she don’t look too good,” Pete coughs.

“Nah, man, that’s fucked up. She’s gooone!” Colson says getting a closer look at you. ‘You can’t talk her back to your room like this. That’s just wrong.”

“The fuck I can!” Jake retorts. “Look,” he says turning to you and lifting your slumped head. “You wanna go to my room with me don’t you, sexy?”

“N-nno” You slur, drunkenly shaking your head ‘Yes’

“See, she shook her ‘yes’,” Jake argues.

“Yeah, and her mouth said fuckin’ NO, Dawg!” Colson snaps back.

“Listen, I’m taking her to my room and there ain’t shit you can do about it!”

“The fuck there is!” Colson swings, his closed fist making contact with the side of Jake’s face, knocking him out cold.

***************************

The next thing you know you’re opening your eyes; an unfamiliar room and bed coming into view. You slowly sit up holding your throbbing head

“Hey, you’re awake,” says a soft voice to your right. Quickly, you turn your head in a panic to see a tall blonde sitting on the edge of the bed.

“W-who are you? Where.. Where am I?” you ask on the verge of tears.

“My name's Colson,” he reaches out for your hand. “I —”

“Don’t touch me!” You yell, scooting backwards pulling  the covers up over you when you realize all you’re wearing is a thin, white, mens t-shirt. “Where are my clothes?”

“Aye, yo, it’s not like that. Relax, listen,” he stands with his hands up backing away from you. “I slept on the couch, I just wanted —”

“Where are my clothes!?” you demand.

“You threw up on them,” he answers.

“So lemme get this right … I threw up and you took off my clo —”

“NO! No! God no!” he says waving his arms. “My roommate Pete —”

“So your roommate Pete took off my clothes…?”

“NOOO! Please, just listen. I swear I was just trying to help you and keep you safe.” The desperation in his voice causes you to let down your guard a little. “I was saying, my roommate Pete. His girl. She stayed over last night and I asked her to help get you cleaned up and changed. I saw nothing I swear,” he puts his hands up again.

You sit there in silence, confused, trying to process everything he just said.

“You really don’t remember anything from last night? Do you?” He asks, stepping slowly back towards the bed.”

“No,” you shake your head, disappointed in yourself.

He cautiously begins to sit back down on the edge of the bed then pauses “Can I?” 

You nod ‘yes’ and he takes a seat.

“Yo, you were in really rough shape last night. I’m assuming you had too much to drink?”

“Yeah,” you admit looking ashamed.

“Aye, we’ve all been there. I’m just glad you’re ok,” he smiles. “Me and my homie Pete were just up here smoking when we seen some dude we know trying to take you back to his room. I could tell you were wrecked. Fuck, you where barely conscious. I tried to tell him how wrong that was but he wouldn’t listen so I knocked him the fuck out. I didn’t know where your dorm was or if you came to the party with anyone and I wanted to make sure you had a safe place to sleep it off.”

“ Thank you. I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions,” you apologize.

“Nah I completely understand,” he accepts your apology. ‘That’s why I wanted to be here when you woke up, I figured you might be a little confused.”

“More than a little,” you let out a small laugh.

Colson cracks a smile, then heads to his dresser, pulling out a pair of his athletic shorts. “Here, tell you what,” he says, tossing the shorts on the bed. “ Imma head out there —” he points to the door. Let you get dressed and I’ll drive you back to your dorm. Cool?”

“Cool,” you answer with a thumbs up and a smile as he steps out the room, closing the door behind him.

*******************

“Seriously, thank you so much,” you say when he pulls up to your dorm.”What can I do for you? I feel like I can’t thank you enough.”

“Nothing. Any respectable man would have done the same thing,” he says.”I can only hope that one day if god forbid my daughter even finds herself in that position that someone would do the same for her.”

“Awww, you have a daughter?”

“Yeah,” he smiles like a proud father, lifting his backside from the drivers seat to pull out his wallet. “Her name’s Casie,” he says opening to her picture.  

“She’s beautiful.”

“Thank you,” he says, then tucking his wallet back into his pocket. “She lives with her mom but I still see her all the time.”

“I’m glad. You seem like you’d be a great father.” you smile. “Thanks again,” you add, stepping out of the car.

“Hey, ummm, wait,” he calls out the car window as you walk towards your dorm.

“Yeah?” you turn back to face him.

“Ain’t you in that bitch Mrs. Pearson’s creative writing class with me?”

“Oh yeah,” you thought he looked familiar. “You usually sit up in the back row right?”

“If you mean ‘take a nap in the back row’, then yeah that’s me”, he laughs.

“Well see you bright and early tomorrow then I guess,” you smile.

“Yeah, see ya,” he smiles back before driving off.

**************************************

The two of you became quite close after that. Gradually moving your seats closer and closer to be near each other in class and pairing up for projects together. You even got to meet his daughter Casie briefly once before her mom picked her up from their weekend visit. You spent a lot of your free time together.It was amazing how you could do absolutely nothing when you were together yet there was no awkward silence or moments: much like right now where you're both hanging out in your dorm just laying on your bed scrolling aimlessly through your phones.

“Oh my god why are men so stupid?” You blurt out in laughter, showing him a tweet on your phone. “This dude really had the audacity to make a whole ass thread about how to eat pussy but he obviously has no clue what he’s talking about; girls don’t squirt out of their clits!’ No wonder girls never cum and have to fake it. Ya’ll mother fuckers don’t even know where the clit IS, and I’m pretty sure squirting is just something made up by the porn industry cuz that shit never happens in real life.”

“Aye, nah I hope you aint including me in that, cuz lemme tell you, ya boy knows where the clit is!  My girls always cum,” he smirks. 

“Yeah, okay,” you roll your eyes. “How do you know they’re not faking?”

“Cuz squirting ain’t made up, that shits VERY real! Maybe not every time but it has happened so I know they weren’t faking,” he smiles. “You mean to tell me a guy has never made you cum?

“Uhn uh” you shake your head no.

“And you’ve never squirt... even ..uhh..by yourself...or with whatever toys you chicks use?”

“I mean I’ve cum alone, but never squirt. No,” you admit blushing. You and Colson have never discussed anything sexual with each other before.

“That’s bananas, dawg!” he exclaims, slapping the bed.

The room grows quiet, the silence feeling awkward for the first time in your whole friendship.

“Aye, uh you trust me right?” Colson breaks the silence

“Yeah, of course, with my life!” you exclaim.”Why?”

“Trust me enough to uhmm...show you what I can do?”

“Are--are you saying you wanna — “

“I wanna make you cum,” he blurts out, cutting you off. “If- if you’ll let me that is.”

“I...Uhmm..I..”, you stumble while thinking it over.

“Sorry… uhhh let’s just forget this whole conversation, okay?” he says ashamed, thinking he made you uncomfortable.

“Why not,” you blurt out nonchalantly.

“Wait!, why not, like… like you … you wanna —”

You silently shake your head yes biting your lip.

“Oh shit! For real?” He says in surprise, getting up off the bed. “Uhh, c’mere,” he calls you over to the edge of the bed.

You do as you're told crawling over to the edge, sitting with your legs dangling off the bed. “You know, you don’t gotta go easy with me,” you smirk waiting for him to make his next move.

“Good, I wasn’t planning on it,” he says, immediately flipping you over and yanking your panties off from under your dress.

“Ugh you boys are all the same,” you groan looking back at him assuming he’s just gonna start fucking you from behind. “Haven’t any of you even heard of foreplay?”

“Don’t tell me no one’s ever eaten your pussy from the back before?” he questions, kneeling down behind you. 

With both hands he grabs your ass making it jiggle for him before delving his tongue between your folds, his tongue exploring every crevice. You gasp at the sensation and feel his muffled laugh buzz against your core, intensifying your pleasure. Gripping your ass tighter, he alternates between plunging a firm, pointed tongue in and out of your wet slit and assaulting your clit with a series of rapid fire kitten licks. Your legs weaken with each lash of his tongue, your body slowly collapsing against the bed.

“Keep that ass up, girl,” he pauses briefly to say. You try with all your might but it’s no use; Colson has reduced your legs to a pile of jello. Roughly he tosses you onto your back, spreads your thighs open and gets back to work. Keeping his tongue focused on your clit, he slides two fingers deep inside of you, his lengthy digits perfectly pressing against your G spot. “I can feel this pussy tightening around my fingers, I know you're close, right?” He pauses to ask cockily.

All you can manage is to nod, ‘yes’, your bottom lip clenched tightly between your teeth as you look down locking eyes with colson; the fiery passion in them is a stark contrast to their ice blue hue.

Colson quickens the pace of his fingers, the sloshing of your wetness audible as he brings you closer to the edge. Then resting his free hand on your mound he gently pulls back the hood of your clit with his thumb exposing the most sensitive part sending your body into convulsions when he rapidly flicks his tongue against it.

“Colson, FUCK!!! ” you scream out in pleasure as the most intense orgasm of your life rips through you. “Oh my god... oh my god,” you chant in pleasure and shock as you realize you’re actually squirting. Colson doesn’t miss a beat continuing to work you through your high, relishing in the mess you're making all over his face and fingers. When you finally stop twitching he removes his fingers and sits up with a smug look. He pulls off his shirt, wipes his glistening face with it, then tosses it on the floor and hurriedly starts undoing his belt.

“You didn’t think I was just gonna stop at one, did you?” He says cockily pulling himself from his boxers. “Awhh, fuck yeah, sooo wet and tight,” he groans as he pushes in, then bringing his hand between your two bodies, and begins to rub your clit as he thrusts.

“Mhmmmhhmm,” you moan, the bundle of nerves still sensitive from your prior orgasm.

“Told ya I could make you feel good,” he teases, his breath ghosting over that one reactive spot on your neck just behind your ear, causing you to let out a little squeak. “You like that?” He laughs, nipping at the same spot while his hips roll in like the tide, crashing repeatedly against the shore of your pelvis. He nips and kisses along your jawline making his way to your mouth, harshly tugging your bottom lip with a groan. Your tongue reaches out, searching for him as he pulls back.

“Fucking tease,” you whimper.

“That desperate to taste yourself on me?” He chaffs.

To be honest you’re desperate for everything he’s giving you right now; you’re body has never felt such pleasure. So when he offers his mouth back to you, you happily welcome the tart taste of yourself still present on his ravenous tongue. Your mouths move in a hungry rhythm, following suit with your hips. Your breaths and moans echo each others, increasing in speed and volume as climax nears. He can tell you’re so so close and he knows just how to get you there. He  grabs your legs pulling you flush against him and throws your legs over his shoulder, keeping your thighs pinned to his chest with both arms as continues to pound you.

“Mhmmm… Yeah, Yeah, Fuck me! Fuck me!”  you whine needily clawing at the sheets as you enjoy his cock from a whole new angle, slamming into your g-spot at the perfect tempo. It’s just a few more thrusts until he has you completely undone, cumming for the second time today.

“Jesus Christ, Colson” you moan breathily as you ride it out.

‘Ughggg,” he grunts loudly, quickly pulling  out, your legs falling to hips as he finishes on your stomach. 

“Can’t believe you were out here talkin’ ‘bout men don’t know where the clit is and no man ever made you cum,” he says mockingly after he catches his breath. “Nah, girl, you just been fucking with some losers. Gotta get you a real man like me.” 

“Well looks like I got myself one now,” you smirk. “ because we will definitely be doing that again!”

“Awhhh shiiiit,” he says loudly, his hand covering his smile. “ Got you addicted to this dick already, huh?” He teases.

“Shut up,Colson-,” you laugh, chucking a pillow at him “- and go get me something to clean off my stomach.”