#do think thats an accident turned purposeful murder | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

maddiwrites · 4 years ago

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Secrets of the Shore (Chapter 22)

Pairing: JJ x OC

Summary: This is just my rewrite of the show Outer Banks with my own twist by adding another main character which also happens to be John B’s twin sister.

Note: Happy Sunday (: Only two more chapters left and I’m sad about it.

Word Count: 6.8k

Chapter 21 Masterlist

My friends drag each other to Heyward's shed where he stores all his useless junk he'll probably never touch again. I always said Pope's dad was a borderline hoarder. But the clutter does nothing to distract me from what's happening to my brother.

I pace back and forth with my hands interlocked on the top of my head. As I move back and forth, my friends keep their eyes trained on me as if I might sprint back to the airstrip.

No one says anything. The four of us are try to defuse the ticking time bomb thats about to blow in all of our heads without actually losing our minds.

I freeze when I hear the familiar hum of a plane fly overhead. I feel my throat tighten and my face heat with frustration. And just like that, Ward Cameron wins again.

"There goes the gold," Pope says and throws his hat across the room.

"Shit!" JJ kicks the closest thing to him which happens to be a three legged wooden table.

"Fuck!" Pope picks up a metal trash bin and throws it across the room, just like his hat.

"Pope!" Kie yells.

"God damn it!" He continues to throw anything he can find. His bomb exploded and he's destroying anything in his path. "Shit! Fuck!" He finds a wooden baseball bat in the heap of the clutter and hits whatever he can find. Glass tables, wooden chairs, more trash bins. I'm almost mesmerized by his movements because I have never seen this side of Pope before. "Shit! Damn it!"

"Pope!" Kie's trying to clam him down while JJ and I just watch with open mouths and raised brows. However, Pope just ignores her and continues to yell and break shit. "Pope!" I can imagine the release Pope must be feeling from this. All my life, I've never seen him act like this. He's usually so composed, always the one to keep us from doing shit like this. I don't know how to react now that roles are reversed. "Pope!"

Pope eventually falls with exhaustion against the arm of a musty green couch and pants to catch his breath.

"Yeah, dude," JJ says slowly. He puts his hand on Pope's shoulder and squeezes. "I was wondering when this was gonna happen. Here you go, chief." JJ holds out his dab pen for Pope to take. Pope looks at it and for the first time, he actually considers it. "A little weed never hurt no one."

"JJ," Kie says, disapproving.

"Relax, Kie."

"You know he doesn't smoke."

Pope ignores both of them and takes the pen from JJ and inhales a large hit. As if this kid couldn't shock me more today.

"Well, maybe not until today."

"Pope."

"Yeah, what is that gonna help?" Pope says. "I lost my scholarship. Walked out in the middle of the interview. Every -" Pope inhales sharply and shakes his head. "It's gone. It's not gonna happen."

"You did that for us?" Kie asks.

"No, not for us. For nothing."

I never thought of silence as being physically heavy, but right now, I feel like I'm being weighed down by a thick fog that I can't swim out of. Pope's right. Despite everything we did right this summer to get something we all deserve, we ended up with nothing except for more problems.

"I'm here for you, Pope," JJ says. "Welcome to my world, okay?"

Kie looks at me for some kind of assistance, but I have nothing to offer. She sighs and looks back at the boys. "JJ -"

"What, Kie? He's right. It doesn't matter anymore."

"You don't have to do that," Kie tells Pope and motions to the weed.

"What do you care?" Pope snaps.

Before this can get any worse, I turn at the sound of footsteps approaching us. My jaw physically hits the ground, at least that's what it feels like, when I see John B.

His eyes are facing forward and his clothes are covered in blood. He looks like he's in some kind of state of shock and I am terrified to find out why.

But my sisterly instincts kick in first. I'm running to him before the others even see him and my hands are pulling his shirt up to make sure the blood isn't his. John B reacts as if I'm not even there and stares ahead.

"John B what happened?" My voice shakes as my eyes scan his body. There's not a even a scratch on him, but I almost wish there was. Because this means the blood belongs to someone else, and I don't want to think that my brother is the reason for it.

"Dude! Dude, you good?" JJ runs up behind me and looks over John B's body with big eyes.

"Oh, my God! John B!"

"Is this yours?"

"Whose blood is that?"

I cup John B's face in my hands and make him look at me. When his eyes finally find mine, I ask, "What happened?"

Before he can answer, cop cars with their sirens on pass us on the road behind us. John B grabs me by the arm and shoves us all back into the shed and we duck behind a wooden slack.

"Shit," Pope curses as his chest moves up and down heavily.

When the coast is clear, John B tells us what happened. Sheriff Peterkin showed up. At first Ward thought she was going to arrest John B for breaking into the airstrip and almost causing a catastrophic accident, but she was there to arrest Ward. Of course Ward wasn't going to go down without a fight and before Peterkin could react, she was shot in the chest. By none other than Rafe Cameron.

"Rafe shot Sheriff Peterkin?" I ask in disbelief.

I always thought Rafe was a lot of things, but I never had cop killer written down on my list. However, I do know that Rafe is the kind of kid who would do absolutely anything to impress his dad. He's been fighting for his attention since he was a tween. Maybe in his own sick way, he thought killing Peterkin was saving his dad.

John B nods. He tells us Peterkin told him to run. And as much as he didn't want to, he was better off with us than dead. Sarah even told him to go as she protected him with her own body while he ran away. Rafe tried to shoot him too but couldn't get his aim down as he sprinted through the woods to get to us.

"What?" I feel my blood turn ice cold when I think about Rafe trying to kill my brother. The one family member I have left. "Why would Rafe want to kill you too?"

John B shrugs. "Because I saw the whole thing."

"So did his sister," I say. "Do you think Sarah is okay?"

"Rafe wouldn't hurt her."

I scoff. "Yeah right."

Now I know that Rafe is pretty much capable of anything worthy to an eternity in hell. I don't think anyone is safe in his company. Not even Sarah. Maybe Ward.

"Kie, can you give me a ride somewhere?" John B asks.

We sneak through the back roads to get to Kie's house. When we get in her car, John B directs her to the police station. By the time we get there, the sun is completely set, blanketing the town in an eery indigo color.

Everything seems so silent to me now. The hum of Kie's radio, the shuffling of leaves brushing against each other, the bickering between my friends and brother. There's a ringing in my ear that won't go away until my hands are wrapped around Rafe's neck.

I feel like my brain as been replaced by a dark cloud. No ideas, no thoughts, no plans can make me feel any better or lighter. It's like an invisible hand has reached down my throat and twisted my heart right out of my chest.

Peterkin was the one and only person that actually helped John B and I. She kept DCS off our backs for as long as she could, she never rubbed it mine or John B's face that the whole island thought we were delusional when we said our dad was coming back, and she was even going to arrest Ward Cameron for my father's murder.

She didn't deserve to die. Although I wasn't the one who pulled the trigger, I can't help but think that her death is somehow my fault. It was my family she was protecting. She was doing her job, but she could have easily written my dad's death off as an accident like every other cop on this island.

"John B, what are we doing at the police station?" JJ asks when Kie parks the car right outside of the front entrance.

"Somebody's gotta tell them what happened." John B's voice is filled with sadness and guilt. I wish I could pull all this weight off his shoulders and add it to mine. He use to be so optimistic - always the one to cheer me up. Now that it's the other way around, I'm dumbfounded on what to do.

Pope takes another hit of JJ's juul and ends up coughing most of the hit up.

"Oh," JJ says from his seat behind Pope and pats his shoulder twice. "Easy there, chief. Damn."

I ignore the fact that Pope sounds like he's hacking up a lung and turn to look at my brother.

"Are you sure?" I ask him.

"All right. I'm just gonna be real with you right now," JJ says to my brother. "You might end up in the lion's den, but you don't go there on purpose. It's fundamental. Just like my old man always told me, you should never ever trust cops, no matter what the circumstance is."

I scoff at the idea of taking advice from JJ's dad.

"Your old man's an abusive liar," Kie says, looking through the rearview mirror with a scowl on her face.

"I agree with JJ," Pope says. "Fuck the police."

Kie turns to look at him. "You going dark side now?"

"When's the last time the police helped us?" Pope says.

"Peterkin looked out for me, all right?" John B says loud enough to grab everyone's attention. "Tried to, at least." He looks at me. "They need to know."

John B steps out of the car with his head hanging low on his shoulders. I bite down on my bottom lip, contemplating what our next move should be. All I know is that I can't let him do this by himself.

"Wait, John B!" I jump out of the car and follow him to the front door. "You're not going to do this alone."

I wait for John B to argue with me but he doesn't. Instead, he nods his head and leads me into the police station, a place I've been in a couple times by force. Never by choice.

There's a woman at the front desk who looks exhausted and busy. I can hear the mumbling of her radio on her desk and the static after each statement. I'm pretty sure I hear Peterkin's name but I don't know if it's my own head repeating her name over and over again.

"Um...excuse me, ma'am," John B says.

The woman barely looks up from her desk and writes something down on her pad of paper in front of her. "This is not a good time, kid." Had she just taken the time to look up, she would see the guy standing in front of her is covered in blood. Maybe then, she would be more worried. Instead, she focuses on her radio. "Adam, advise if you need air tran."

I open my mouth to give this woman a piece of my mind, but John B cuts me off. His voice soft and broken. "I know who shot the Sheriff."

I force myself to look up at him. He looks like he's trying his best to keep himself composed when all I know he wants to do is collapse on the nearest chair and just...breathe.

The woman freezes and finally takes in John B's appearance. She studies the stain on his shirt and the sweat on his skin, the hollowness behind his eyes and his shaky hands.

"You stay put," She says as she backs away. "I'll get a deputy."

I look around the station and feel an uneasy swirling motion in my stomach. It's unsettling. Like JJ's words are getting in my head. Maybe coming to the cops wasn't such a good idea.

My head snaps towards the radio when it statics to life again. "Central, three Vick. We have a suspect in our 31. John Routledge."

My blood runs cold and my eyes flash up to meet John B's. He's staring down at the radio like it's an actual person and he's frozen in shock.

Another woman's voice comes up on the radio. "Copy that. All units, be on the lookout for John B Routledge."

"Sixteen year old white male. Six foot. Last seen wearing board shorts, a 'Bad Brains' T shirt, and a faded red hoodie."

"Copy that."

My hands grab John B's to drag him out of here. My head scrambles to come up with our best plan, but I know staying here isn't it. Ward somehow managed to spin this around on my brother. I shouldn't be shocked, but I keep managing to be knocked out with more surprises right when I think things couldn't get any worse.

Just as I'm about to pull John B out of there, two cops come out from the back and stare at the two of us with big eyes. A man and woman dressed in their faded brown deputy uniforms. My eyes trail down to their hands that are both steady on the gun in their holster, ready to aim if they need to.

"Just...breathe. All right?" The woman cops holds out her hand as if to tell John B to stay calm.

The other officer nods. "John B. Do what she says."

"Look, I didn't...I didn't do it, okay?" John B tries to explain but his voice his shaky and lacks any sort of confidence.

"Dont...move."

"Go..." My voice is barely a hushed whisper but my tug on his arm is strong. "Go, go, go. Run!"

John B and I sprint out of the station before any officers can guard the door. I can barely hear them yelling after us through the drumming in my ears.

"Kie! Start the car!" John B yells as we basically body slam ourselves into her car. "Start the car, Kie!"

I basically rip the back door open and stumble into JJ's lap after tripping on my own feet. Everyone's yelling. The people in the car. The people running out of the police station.

"What? John B!" Kie yells as her hands shake. She tries putting the keys back into the ignition but her hands are trembling too much.

"The cops!"

"Shit!" JJ curses and looks over my shoulder at the cops who are sprinting towards us.

"Go!" John B yells at her. She turns the key but of course the car decides not to start. "Kie, drive! Go!"

"Go Kie!" Now I'm yelling at her.

"Stop the car!" One of the cops yell with her gun raised at the back window.

"I'm going! I'm sorry!" Kie says as anxiety cripples through her.

"Right now!" The woman cop from inside approaches the car. She tries to open it but the door is locked.

"What did you do?" Kie yells at us.

Kie moves the vehicle slowly out of the parking lot, but the woman is relentless. She runs with us side by side and hooks her fingers around the door handle.

"Open it!" JJ yells at John B.

John B opens the door to knock the cop off the car. The tactic works and she rolls on the ground. Only now we'll probably be written up for assault too.

I fall back into my seat and pant for breath. My head falls back against the cushioned seat and my eyes close. Okay, okay, think, Marleigh. Think.

Ward killed my dad. Ward stole my gold. Rafe killed Peterkin. And somehow, my brother is the one being framed for murder. Make it all make sense.

I hate them. The Camerons. Kooks. All entitled, greedy sons of bitches who don't know how to handle rejection or the word 'no.' They think all their meals should be served on a silver platter and kids like us are born for the sole purpose to serve them. They deserve to rot. They deserve to feel all the pain we do.

And yet, they don't. And they never will because that's the life we live. A life where people like Ward and Rafe Cameron can get a way with murder because no one would blink twice at their lame excuse of a story.

A lie.

It all boils down to money. Money we almost had right in our pockets. But now it's gone as is pretty much everything else in my life. My house. My dad. Maybe now my brother.

JJ laces his fingers with mine and gives my hand a gentle squeeze. I keep my eyes closed but let my head fall on his shoulder. I focus on his touch. How his thumb delicately rubs against my skin in a light up and down motion. How his lips are able to make my heart flutter when they kiss the top of my head. How his soft whispers, telling me everything is going to be okay, are sweet enough to make me melt into a buttery mess.

Maybe not everything's gone. I still have JJ. The constant in my life. The one who can always make me feel better even in the shittiest of situations. My sun on my darkest nights. My sight into the future when I can't even think of tomorrow.

I don't let JJ go. Even when Kie parks the car back at Heyward's shed under an open roof. We have literally nowhere else to go. The cops will undoubtedly check all of our homes, including Kie's. The Chateau is definitely surrounded by cops, waiting for John B and I to make the dumb move of going back there. And Tannyhill isn't an option anymore.

The sun is already poking out behind the trees as morning approaches. My body aches from sleeping in this cramped car, but I try to ignore the pain and focus on the fact that we're all still together. For now.

The five of us sit in silence. Some of us try to wrap our heads around what just happened and try to come up with another plan. The rest of us, like me, are so tired, they can't even remember what their middle name is.

The only noise in the car comes from Kie's radio. "...should be functional within twenty four hours." Meanwhile, another cop car with loud sirens pass us on the road without sparing this car a second glance. "And still, no arrest in the shooting death of Sheriff Susan Peterkin. The state police have issued a statement regarding a local person of interest, a juvenile from -"

Kie switches the radio off and glances back at John B and I. My brother has his seat reclined all the way back and is staring up the at the ceiling of the car. JJ has moved so his back is against the car door with one leg bent at the back of the seat and the other one on the floor. I sit between his legs and play with the necklace he gave me a couple days ago. Crazy enough, it feels like years since he gifted me this.

"Let's game this out," JJ is the first to speak. He looks at Kie and Pope in the front seat. "Maybe you guys can help, being the smart ones and all, but..." He sighs. "...who are the cops going to believe? Ward Cameron or us? So the accuser is a big shot developer, kind of lord of the island, got the governor on speed dial kind of person, and the accused...is John B, who is...pretty much a homeless sixteen year old boy at the moment."

"Thanks." John B deadpans.

"Okay, man. Yucatan, all right? I'm saying that's the only option." John B gives him a look to stop talking but of course JJ doesn't take the hint. "What other options do you have?"

"Enough with the Mexico bullshit," Kie says.

"Sarah will bail me out," John B says a lot more confidently than I feel about the situation.

"She did witness the whole thing," Kie says.

"Thank you."

"You really think she's going to pick you over her own family?" I can't help the attitude that drips off my tongue with each word. Sarah's a nice girl and I really liked her. But Rafe and Ward are her family. "No offense, but you've really only known each other for a few weeks."

"Not happening, bro. Okay?" JJ says, agreeing with me. "We gotta get you off the island."

"The ferry," Pope speaks up for the first time all morning. "It's the only way."

"Exit stage left while you still can. Before the entire island is on lockdown."

"Guys, just get down," Kie slumps further into her seat as another round of sirens pass us.

"Sarah's not a Pogue, John B," Pope says. He has a point. Sarah hasn't been friends with all of us for that long. I almost wouldn't even blame her if she took her family's side.

"Yeah. You can't stay here, man," JJ says, tightening his hold on me.

Another moment of silence passes through us and I wonder if JJ's right. Adrenaline on the island is at an all time high. No cop, no lawyer, no person is going to believe John B over Ward. Not without evidence. We need time to clear John B's name. So maybe getting him off the island would be best. Even if it's just temporary.

~ ~ ~

When Kie parks in front of the ferry, Pope hops out to buy the tickets and Kie moves to the passenger seat. I offered to go with him but JJ told me that was a bad idea because I would get recognized as John B's sister.

So here I am, useless and laying down as flat as I can next to John B to avoid being seen through the windows.

I look at John B. His eyes are closed and his chest moves heavily up and down. His fingers flex and clench into fists every couple of seconds. I wonder if his fractured hand is starting to hurt him.

"The first thing we're doing when we get off this stupid island is buying you a new outfit," I say. I cringe in disgust when I look at Peterkin's blood stain on his clothes. Another reminder that she's dead.

I look up to the front seat window when Pope comes back to the car. He's mumbling to himself and I think he has something in his hand.

"Okay. All right, no."

"Pope, can you act normal?" Kie says through clenched teeth and unlocks the door for Pope to get in.

"Okay, um...okay, so, bad news. The ferry's closed, and there is this."

Kie takes a piece of paper from his hand and looks at it. Her eyes close for half a second and she shakes her head. "Shit."

"What is that? What is this?" John B asks.

JJ snags the paper out of Kie's hand and looks at it. "Well, John B, uh...this is a good framer of you." He turns the paper over and shows my brother and I a picture of John B on a 'WANTED' sign with a cash reward of $25,000.

"Okay, so the whole island's looking for John B right now," Pope says.

"That's a lot of money," I can't help but laugh. "Gotta say, John B. Didn't think you would be worth that much. Hell, maybe I'll turn you in."

"Congratulations John B, you're famous," JJ says.

John B slaps the outside of my thigh with the back of his hand. I scoff and slap him back, which causes a strings of slaps and hits, though mostly playful, and some a little harder.

"Stop. Guys, stop!" Kie says loudly. JJ pulls my hands away from my brother and folds them in my lap. He gives me a warning look, like a teacher would their student, and it makes me want to laugh about how bizarre this whole thing is. "We got to get to the HMS. We need small, no running lights -"

"It's at the Chateau, Kie," John B says.

"And I wonder if the cops got the entire place taken out," JJ says sarcastically. "Let me think. Oh, yeah. No. they definitely have that place locked down."

"Let me think. Just give me a second," John B says frustratingly.

"JJ," Pope says.

"What?" He looks up.

"Does your dad still have the boat? The cigarette boat, the Phantom. The one he used to race."

I look up at JJ, but I can't read his emotions. He keeps his face unfazed. "Maybe."

"You could get right up the coast, no problem. Okay, look - "

"It won't be easy, Pope."

"The surf's running from three to four."

"I don't know where the keys are."

"Well, find them."

"I'm thinking," JJ snaps.

"Why is nobody moving forward?" Pope yells at the car in front of us and bangs the palm of his hand on the steering wheel.

I rub my fingers in a circular motion on my temples and close my eyes again. Words are being spat at about a million miles per hour. It's hard to keep up and my blood vessels twist with anxiety.

"Can you relax?" Kie hisses. "JJ, how much weed did you give him?"

"Guys," John B says. "Your car's on the poster."

Pope ignores everyone and hits his fist against the horn of the car. "Can we move it?"

"Pope!"

I'm going to puke.

"Come on!"

"Don't honk the horn!" Kie says, hitting Pope's arms away from the wheel.

"It's that guy. Right there!" I hear a voice outside our window say. The voice sounds young. Kid-like.

"Shit," John B tries pushing himself further into his seat. I didn't even realize he sat up in the first place.

"We got a snitch. Pope, turn the car on," JJ says, sitting up in his seat and leaning forward to hit Pope on the shoulder.

"We get $25,000 if we find him!" The kid says.

"Hey! He's right there!" Another voice. Manly. Great, we're drawing a crowd.

"Hey! We gotta go!" Kie yells.

"Pope, go!" I yell.

"Turn the car on!" JJ yells.

We're all yelling and I think my eardrums might burst.

"I found him first!" The kid says to the man.

"Hell you did, you little bastard!"

"Pope, turn the frickin' car on!" JJ yells.

The crowd starts growing around the car. John B turns into my side and pulls his hood up over his head.

"I am trying!" Pope yells back at us.

"Turn the car on!"

"Go, go, go!"

Pope jerks the car forward and hits the car in front of us. I jolt forward in the middle seat and stop myself from going through the windshield by pressing my two arms on the front two seats.

I hear the crowd gasp and move backwards to avoid the nutso in the front seat. Now that I think about it, who let Pope drive in the first place?

"Pope! Jeez!" JJ curses.

"Dude, back up!" Kie yells.

Pope puts the car in reverse and steps on the gas, but hits another car in the process.

"Hey!"

"The other way!"

JJ pats Pope's shoulder again. "It's okay! Pope, just go!"

Pope hits the corner of Kie's front bumper against the car in front of us again but continues to step on the gas until we're completely out of our spot.

"What are you doing?" Kie yells at him.

"We'll bump out!"

"Watch out!" I yell when I spot a couple of people crossing the street before Pope can kill them.

"Whoa! Whoa! Watch out!" Pope yells and swings his hands in front of him to motion for the people to jump out of the way. "Watch out!" My back hits the back of my seat, hard. Pope has the audacity to laugh. Head back and all. "Oh my god."

"Pope!" Kie yells. "What the fuck?"

"I'm living my best life right now," Pope says through laughter.

Kie slumps in her seat. "My mom's gonna kill me."

"I should be the last to say this, but you are not okay to drive," JJ says. I turn to glare at him and he puts his hands up in the air to surrender. He looks back out to the road and yells, "Stop!"

Pope stomps on the brakes and sends us skidding to a stop. JJ's arm whips out to the right to stop me from flying forward.

We're gonna die.

Pope looks over his shoulder at my brother. "John B, get out."

"What?" I glare.

"He's right," JJ says and my head snaps to him. He ignores me. "We'll draw the cops, you run."

"Shit," John B curses and unbuckles himself.

"I'll get the rig, and I'll meet you in the dump tomorrow, okay? Three o'clock, okay?"

"Wait, I'm coming with you," I say, but John B shakes his head.

"No. You stay here. Stay with them."

"I'm not leaving you!" I fight back and look at him like he has two heads. He must think I'm crazy if he thinks I'm going to let him run away by himself.

"JJ -" John B looks at him.

"On it. Go!" JJ's hands wrap around my waist, forcing me to stay in the car. I try prying his fingers off of me, but he's a lot stronger than I am. John B starts running off. "Three tomorrow at the dump!" When John B disappears behind the tree, JJ finally lets me go. I turn around and shove him back by his chest and slide over to the seat that John B was just in. JJ sighs and looks forward again. "Come on, go, go, go!"

Pope steps on the gas again and veers forward.

I look out the window and ignore the queasiness that has fully taken over my stomach. I know John B and JJ were right to keep me in the car. I would only slow John B down and get myself in trouble and therefore, be completely useless in helping my brother. But I can't shake the feeling that I'm abandoning him.

~ ~ ~

Pope, for some reason, is still driving. I don't know where he's going but it seems like we're on our way to Figure Eight. Pope turns on the radio, blasting one of North Carolina's hip hop stations.

JJ leans forward in the middle seat and pushes his head between Kie and Pope. He's managing to laugh like we're on some joy ride on Memorial Day weekend. "Pope, you clocked that car, man. Like that was so bad!" JJ shakes his head. "I'm just glad I'm not driving now."

" Pull over." Kie tells Pope. "JJ, it's not funny. He shouldn't be driving."

JJ grimaces. "Mama's mad."

Pope pulls the car over and switches seats with Kie. A delirious grin stays on the high boy's lips as he settles in the passenger seat.

"What are you -"

"Where are we going?" I ask Kie as she makes a familiar right turn.

"The last place they're gonna look." Kie says.

~ ~ ~

By the time Kie pulls up to Tannyhill, the sun has disappeared into the horizon and the pit of my stomach is the size of a category five hurricane. I can't remember the last time I ate or drank anything and the pounding in my head feels like a hundred bullets are penetrating my skull.

Kie's brilliant idea is to somehow get to Sarah and convince her to go to the police to confess what actually happened.

"Perfectly focused," Pope says to himself, which makes me glare at him. Pope is anything but focused.

"You sure this is a good idea?" JJ says.

"She's the only one who can clear John B," Kie says.

"Last place they'll look because of how stupid it is."

Kie ignores JJ and gets out of the car with Pope following right behind her. When I open the door, JJ pulls me back and closes the door again.

I look at him. My first reaction is to be concerned. Something in JJ's expression makes me fold. For a second I forget the mess we're in and I get lost in his blue eyes. It's just me and JJ and the world outside of this car no longer exists.

His warm hand wraps around my smaller one and he pulls me closer into him. His other hand cups my face, right underneath my jaw. My face feels like it's physically sparkling with the touch of his breath and forget butterflies - there is a zoo in the pit of my stomach. I glide into JJ like magnet.

His lips press into mine and I cave in. I pull him close enough to where I'm straddling him. Time stops as does my breathing. My fingers run through his blonde hair, tugging on the ends. He stifles back a moan and my face flushes pink.

I pull back for breath and rest my forehead against his. I don't know how many more times we're going to get to do that. And it hurts me thinking it might come to an end.

"I'm sorry," I say.

JJ ignores me. "When we get to Yucatan, we're getting a bungalow. We're going to live in bathing suits and get drunk off of pina coladas every day. Skinny dipping is going to be our main source of exercise - well, other than the hot dangerous sex we're gonna have every night. I'm never going to leave your side and I'm going to keep you safe until the day we die. In a few years, we'll get married. You're gonna wear that dress you wore to Midsummers and we're gonna have beautiful beach babies who will go on to win surfing championships by the time they're ten because they're going to be prodigies. Our prodigies. And John B is going to be there with us. Because he's not going to jail for a crime he didn't commit. Okay?"

I don't even realize tears are streaming down my face until he's wiping his thumb against my wet cheek.

"Promise?" My voice cracks and I really wish it didn't. But that's the life I want. That's the life I need. I don't care if it's in Yucatan or in the middle of a deserted island. I just need my boys, Kie, and Pope.

JJ kisses my left cheek. Then my right and my nose. "I promise."

"I love you, J."

"And I love you. Everything is going to be okay. I'm going to make sure you're okay."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay."

JJ laughs. "Okay."

As much as I don't want to leave him, as much as I'd rather stay here with JJ and forget about all our problems, I know I can't. Because Kie is probably freaking out, waiting for me. Because John B is on the run somewhere and I need to do something, anything to help him.

"I should probably..."

JJ rolls his eyes playfully. "Yeah I know. Be quick. Okay?"

I nod and jump out of the car before my head or my heart can make me do otherwise. I push my legs, that feel like rubber, over the stone wall that lines the Cameron's property.

I stop in my tracks when I hear Pope and Kie in some kind of intense conversation...well as intense as Pope can handle right now. I think he's still super high.

"Pope! Pope! Pope! Sh!" Kie says in a hushed tone.

"Hey, I'm trying to tell you, I love you."

Oh shit. I look at the stone wall I just jumped over and consider jumping back over it to avoid eavesdropping on this conversation.

"First of all, I need you to be quiet," Kie says.

"Okay, yeah. Quiet, I mean -"

"No. Stop talking, like, now." Kie says. This time, Pope doesn't speak. "Second of all...thank you for saying that."

I can't help but physically cringe at that statement. Because I know what's coming next.

"Okay," Pope chuckles.

"Now, that's very sweet, but it's - look it's not gonna happen."

"Okay, well, why not?"

This is like a car wreck you can't look away from. I had a feeling Pope was in love with Kie for years now. But he never acted on it. Didn't even flirt with her the way JJ did before we were together. A part of me always hoped he did. Because I wanted to see how Kie would react. I think the two of them would be really cute together. Kie could teach Pope to take more risks and Pope could give her a beautiful life that didn't require her working for her parents forever. They compliment each other. Always have.

"Because Pogues can't mack on other Pogues."

Pope scoffs. "That rule doesn't make sense, and nobody follows it. I mean look at JJ and Marleigh -"

"Look, I - I want something different."

"Okay, I-"

"I - I wanna go to Antartica, and I wanna ride camels..."

"I want to do those things with you."

"No. Pope, it's not gonna work."

"I want to be that person!"

"No. It's not gonna happen," Kie shakes her head. God, this is brutal. I can't wait to tell JJ. "Do you understand what I'm saying? Like..." Kie sighs. "Look, I know that that's really hard to hear right now, but we don't have time for this, and this is a really bad place to do it." She pauses and Pope doesn't respond. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah..." He says, but his voice has completely changed. It's dark and cold and doesn't match my Pope's personality.

"Are you ready for the plan, or..."

"Yeah."

"Okay..." Kie says and this is when I decide to make my entrance. I can't help with the situation at hand but at least I can cause a distraction.

So I cough. "Sorry for the hold up. JJ and I were just fighting over who has to be look out. So..." I force myself to look between Pope and Kie as if I didn't just witness their whole conversation. I try not to focus on the tear streak down Pope's cheek and look at Kie. "Ready?"

Kie nods and leads us towards the Cameron's. A house I almost called my home.

Kie is in charge of getting to Sarah Cameron by her bedroom window while I stay with Pope and create a distraction. We decided it was best if one of us stayed with Pope so I offered myself, considering what I just watched.

Pope still seems to be upset. He's not exactly being quiet trying to stay hidden like we should be.

"Gotta stick to the plan," Pope mumbles to himself and plays with the grill. I find the closest pillow on their patio set and place it on top of it. "I like camels. I like Antartica."

"Pope..." I say softly. The last thing I want is to piss him off more but he's making me nervous.

He ignores me. "What's wrong with that plan?" He bends down and picks up a rubber duck in a paramedic costume and looks at it thoughtfully. "Same." I don't know exactly what that means but he throws the duck into the grill and finds the lighter fluid. When he saturates the pillow...and duck, he turns the grill on. The fluid quickly ignites and flames shoot out from the grill. Pope's head is close enough to the fire that his hat catches on fire. "Shit!"

"Holy shit," I throw my arm at his head and knock the hat off of him. I stomp on it until the flame dies under my sneakers and pull him behind the closest tree that can hide us both.

Less than a minute later, I hear two pairs of footsteps come out. I recognize Ward's voice as he curses at the destructed grill until he stops and mutters the name "Sarah" under his breath and makes a beeline back in side.

Taglist: @notyourcupofteax @acvross-the-universe @jjmaybankzz @moniamaybank @realistic-breadstick @urbinoutfiters @jeeperky @brebear121 @x-lulu @freddymaybank @jjpouggues @lemur46 @is-it-really-a-secret @kkmikayla @folkloverr @alexa-playafricabytoto @jjxrudy @migilini @stellarskys @rochyu @itsagurl @dazzlingnights

#jj maybank fic #outer banks rewrite #jj x oc

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songofclarity · 3 years ago

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In one of your metas you wrote something that left me thinking and now i cant stop thinking about it. What if madam lan was a wen and thats why CR was burnt? there is the little datail of timing and why nothing was made before that but... i kinda like this idea? Now i need madam lan as former lady wen.

Madam Lan as a former Lady Wen is so good! It pains me that the puzzle piece doesn't quite fit in canon but like, maybe if we skim off some of the heel it would fit into this beautiful shoe LOL

That Madam Lan was subjected to Lan "justice" after murdering the Lan Elder by having to marry QingHeng-jun, and then put under house arrest, and then the Lan told everyone that she had some "unspeakable disease and could not see others" (ch 64), would suggest that either the Wen were not all that powerful twenty years ago or she sacrificed herself to the Lan on purpose.

Considering how the the number one rule of the Qishan Wen Clan is basically to uphold the Qishan Wen Clan, I do have trouble imagining the Wen handing a Lady Wen over the Lan Sect and washing their hands of the whole affair. But the Wen Clan we get to know is one ruled by Wen RuoHan, who obviously takes measures to uphold, promote, and protect his family. Wen RuoHan appears to have inherited a powerful sect, but what sacrifices might have been made by his parents, relatives, and past generations to get there?

No one knows what went down between Lady Wen and the Lan Elder. Maybe she had a justifiable reason to kill the Lan Elder, or maybe she didn't. The Lan Elder is dead and all the other Lans are upset and want justice. Will they pick a fight with the whole Wen Sect over it? QingHeng-jun, who is in love with her, thus thinks he is saving her from his own people by marrying her, and perhaps she, in turn, saves his people from the Wen Sect by going along with it. She only wanted to kill the Lan Elder, or maybe the whole thing was an accident she regrets. What is done is done. It's not a bad union and thus neither Wen nor Lan can complain.

Just because she never complained about her situation to her young children, however, doesn't mean she didn't complain to QingHeng-jun, Lan QiRen, or any other adult around. The Lan Sect get their vengeance on her by isolating her from her family, both old and new. If she speaks up or fights back and the Wen Sect hear about it, of course the whole Lan Sect will be put in danger, and soon that will include her children, too. Children she can only see once a month as if to taunt her. They prevent her from teaching them herself or running off with them.

That she never asked about their education shows she had no interest in what the Gusu Lan were teaching.

Although maybe she did have an unspeakable disease that killed her after ten years. Or maybe she died of loneliness and grief and misery. Maybe she killed herself when she had had enough. Maybe she was killed by some Lan who had had enough of them all playing house (we see Lan rules broken all the time). Regardless, her ending is an incredibly unhappy one, which seems to be the fate of all Wens...

Since the Lan tried to hide Madam Lan's death from her own children, they might very well have hidden it from the Wen Sect. Maybe they pretended she was still alive all that time!? When the Wen find out what truly happened to her and that she has been dead for years, they are not pleased!

Wen Xu takes on the task of going to Cloud Recesses to confront QingHeng-jun about Lady Wen. A discussion they hold in private, and thus all the rumors account it as just "something," which so many people consider it being over nothing. And then Wen Xu forces the Lan to burn Cloud Recesses to the ground. The whole place can be burned in her honor, with all the buildings and wealth of the Gusu Lan going to her in the afterlife. And since she gave herself up to the Lan willingly, the Wen won't destroy them outright. Instead the Wen will be there to help guide the Lan once they are reborn from the ashes~

Make her Lady Wen and suddenly Cloud Recesses being burned down, the Wen indoctrination camp to replace the Lan indoctrination camp, and the supervisory offices become a little more personal in motive.

Although I will conclude this by saying that other than her being Lady Wen, I think her being related to Wen (Zhao) ZhuLiu fits quite well with canon. The destruction of Cloud Recesses and the death of QingHeng-jun would surely make him feel much gratitude to the Wens and to Wen RuoHan, and that he joined the Wen by name would make her a Wen by proxy~

But then Wen RuoHan and Madam Lan being related? Maybe even siblings?? Wen RuoHan does strike me as a younger sibling so the loss of his older sister would go right in step with our several other sibling stories in MDZS.

#asked from above #kitsune1818 #madam lan #mdzs thoughts #i want to write short responses but they all come out long lol

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the-family-fortune · 4 years ago

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Earlier today Cali asked me quite possibly the worst thing you CAN ask me

And boy howdy did I have some thoughts.

idk if ive mentioned it here before or not but I have a lot of feelings about the idea of redemption in psy2. I LIKE the idea that no one is beyond redemption, that people can be good and that we are all, at our core, just hurting. and those are the themes that psychonauts plays with. mental illnesses that are seen as "scary" like the inmates (though the inmates themselves are rarely presented as scary, with maybe the exception of Edgar because he's just. huge.) - bipolar mood swings with inexplicable rage, Edgar's anger issues and sheer strength combined into an intimidating figure, and the stigma of multiple personalities like how Fred acts meek one second and then on the warpath the next when he "switches". All of these oooh scary mental illnesses are literally just people grappling with trauma. Edgar's OCD and the trauma from high school, Fred's... weird genetic memory issues, and Gloria's inner critic and the death of her mother. These things are like, Normal People Problems (sorry fred idk what the fuck is up with u buddy ur on another level all together) and really contextualize the inmates' mental illness in a way that emphasizes the main theme of empathy.

I intentionally leave Boyd out of this because while the root of his mental illness is schizoaffective paranoia, his ROLE as the Milkman and in fact his entire mindscape is the product of Oleander's hypnosis.

So like, I VIBE WITH THAT, its a really really interesting take on the conversation about mental illness and how these things do not make people inherently bad or scary!!

But I feel like, BASED ON WHAT WE KNOW RIGHT NOW, that the Galochios - or, at the very least, Zalto on his own - fall into a different kind of category.

The Galochios from the start are jealous people. They're jealous of the Aquato's fame and think that they deserve more recognition which in and of itself isn't a bad thing per se - wanting to feel appreciated and recognized and seen is just a basic human desire, I think. But jealousy isnt a mental illness. Jealousy is a natural human emotion that we, as rational and empathetic people, must make the conscious choice to deal with in healthy ways. The Galochios don't, and they let that consume them from the start - where they allow themselves to hate the Aquatos for their fame, where they allow themselves to ostracize Marona, where they drive her out of the family and where they attempt to drag her back, it's not the product of mental illness destroying relationships like someone in Edgar's position might experience, but pure pride and jealousy directed towards the Aquato family.

And like from there its just all downhill

And I could argue that from this point things compound to create a mental landscape that maybe isnt the picture of health in the Galochios, because grief can really, really fuck you up, and regardless of how they acted, losing a daughter or a sister when Marona died, could not have been easy.

But I cannot read "the Galochios crowded around the tank to gleefully watch Lazarus's decapitation" and be like "aw they're just hurting 8(" because mental illness is not synonymous with undue cruelty.

Like the Galochios at every turn are presented with A Choice and by god they're determined to make the wrong one. Whether or not this is motivated by grief or jealousy or whatever doesnt matter, because even when you are mentally ill it is still the bare minimum to not gleefully watch someone you dont like get decapitated, u know?

That is, I think, them consumed by jealousy and hate and seeing nothing wrong with it because it benefits them and hurts people they dont like. Thats. that's not mental illness that's just being an asshole

So while I absoLUTEly vibe with Psychonaut's theme of empathy and compassion and understanding that mental illness isnt bad or scary, and that we're all struggling with something, I think that narrative has two sides to it, and the same way that "we're all struggling with something" lends to the idea that we need to extend compassion to others, the Galochios being so stubbornly cruel as to be irredeemable in the narrative of psychonauts two lends to the equally important theme of "but you can not sacrifice yourself for people who do not WANT help"

Because of the nature of the things the Galochios have done (and perhaps, are still doing, as we move into the secrets behind the RoR and Psy2 narrative) I think that it would take a LOT. A LOT. for the writing to pass off a Galochio redemption in a meaningful and complete way, because of the nature of the choices they make. From what I know about them right now, these are not the actions of people who are... hallucinating grandeur or some greater purpose who believe in some hidden agenda like Boyd. From what I can gather and what we already know about the Galochio backstory, this is just the kind of people they are.

Now, taking into account Zalto specifically, I can without a doubt see him having some major psychological damage. Like I said earlier, grief can really, really fuck you up, and Zalto experienced more grief than reasonable, all at once, with the tank accident. He was already not the most stable person. ("But Daisy!" I hear you cry, "Augustus lost his entire family in a year and didn't snap like that!" True but look me in the eye and tell me you think he's coped with it in a healthy manner. Augustus experienced unreasonable amounts of grief and as a result his ten year old thinks he wants him dead.)

So if that turns out to be the case, and we see a level where we actually do deal with that grief in a healthy way (which imo would be very interesting to see the trauma of grief treated the same as mental illness - even though we all experience grief at some point, sooooome of us dont quite take it as well as others, whoops!) we could see the baseline path to a Zalto redemption.

But really it all boils down to responsibility for their actions and how they handle their trauma and the fact that eight Aquatos were murdered does not automatically become sympathetic because Zalto was dealing with grief. I personally, would be really interested to see the Galochios as villains end the game as villains and for that stubbornness and unwillingness to accept empathy or help be shown as their downfall, because irl its incredibly unhealthy and self-destructive to refuse help or refuse to SEEK help when you very clearly know that something is hurting you, and that you are in turn hurting others.

I also REALLY don't want them to be given the Oleander treatment.

As much as I love Oleander, I feel like a lot about his character was mismanaged, and he was turned into comedic relief in RoR.

like. A lot of my thoughts on the psy2 narrative as a whole relies heavily on the li-po document of course but the story that we were given IN psy1 vs the story that we are told in the document are so STARKLY different.

"Oleander wants to take over the world because he's angry at tall people from that time from that time his dad killed his bunny, which traumatized him" is NOT the same as "Oleander spent his formative years FIRMLY BELIEVING that his father saw him as a burden because he was small, thought he was nothing better than pig slop, and witnessed the death of an animal that he had a psychic connection to, after which he spent his entire life attempting to make his father proud only to be rejected by every branch of the military. By the time he was finally a Psychonaut and felt he would be able to make his father proud despite his stature, both of his parents died horribly in a meat grinder accident while he was away training."

NOT THE SAME HOLY SHIT.

Oleander had so much POTENTIAL but he was kinda shoehorned into a very two-dimensional role. Idk if it was because of budget or time or what, because the production of psy1 was very..... not great. But its absolutely a SHAME to see such a heartbreaking backstory reduced to "short and angry about it"

And it absolutely cheapens his redemption, too.

The fact that Oleander's story was so heavily pruned COMBINED with the fact that - while it's hinted at in game, its honestly INSANELY difficult to put two and two together imo because of how its presented, Ford outright tells us that Oleander's assignment to whispering Rock was the cause of his mental break (the camp sits on a motherload of psitanium. It makes psychics more psychics, and unstable people more unstable.")

that's never once brought into the resolution of Oleander's character arch and the processing of his trauma and how the psychonauts directly contributed to his deteriorating mental state that led him to try and take over the world because they so deeply misunderstand psitanium but decided to build a kids summer camp training facility on top of it

thats like... early experimentation with nuclear materials before we understood the dangers of radiation. Not to stay topical or anything, but its a clearly dangerous substance that the Psychonauts treat very blase.

But to get back on track there, I really hope that if the Galochios DO receive a redemption arc in psy2, which seems likely given the overarching theme of the games themselves even extending to Loboto of all people... I hope they don't butcher it like they did with Oleander's. Given that they've had five years and a LOT more experience with this genre and its storytelling conventions (plus the fact that they're just excellent storytellers to begin with) I have a cautious optimism that whatever happens with the Galochios it will at least be a satisfying conclusion. (For comparison, Oleander's butchered redemption is still kinda held together by the satisfying conclusion of the game, in which Raz actually becomes a Psychonaut so that isnt to say that psy1 didnt have a satisfying conclusion)

and at this point im sure you're regretting telling me to talk as much as i want because if there's one thing you ought to know about me by now its that i never shut up about the Galochios and honestly I've had a lot of thoughts about them and the themes of Psychonauts and the general structure of storytelling in the Psychonauts games overall.

As for the Galochio family themselves, I'm fascinated to see exactly who survived and what the power structure of the remaining Galochios is. If Zalto makes the final cut, I want VERY badly to know how he treats his family and if his anger has kinda pervaded what was probably a long time ago a relatively tight knit family. I want to see the individuals involved in this, how far they're each willing to go and where that lies in relation to Zalto. Like everyone has their moral limits, and if Zalto is utterly consumed by his goal to either obliterate the Aquatos or resurrect his family (shudder) his tolerance for atrocities may be much higher than that of his family members, which would automatically sow dissonance within the family when one by one people start deciding this is too much, this is too far, we cant keep doing this.

#Psychonauts #Psychonauts 2 #Psy2 spoilers #ooc #Galochios #i care them. trash family.

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kyu-bri · 4 years ago

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| \

| \y\O

@myrtenast3r J \ A \

COME LOOKIE PAW I CAUGHT ONE!

*ahem*

A quick giant rundown!!!!

Mami is a well-todo 15yr old girl of the 80s. She is very much in love with her Real Actual Explicitly Romantic Girlfriend Kyoko.

Mamis father is a medical scientist, currently working on a project to create synthetic organs and tissues for ailing people. He has recently teamed his efforts with an engineer with an affinity for Purple. I do not remember if purple guy made the animatronics but in my defense we recast who purple guy is believed to be every year.

Kyoko's father runs a very liberal unorthodox church, that believes in blasphemous things like Gay Is Okay and Abortion Is Not Murder

People murder Kyokos family over this

Mami finds her gfs church burning down, Kyoko the only one still alive- but severely burned and not hanging around for long

Kyoko stops breathing before they get to the hospital, and Mamis father, in panic and sympathy for his hysterical daughter, takes her into his lab and hooks her up on life support, he sets to calcifying her insides and rebuilding her bodyfunctions from the inside out.

The result is calcified balljointed skin and a brain full of electrified wire. Kyoko wakes up stoic and moving stiffly, slowly relearning how to articulate and react. The only semblance of her old self is being able to identify Mami, giving her joy and hope, and Mamis father severe anxiety.

Mamis father is secretly horrified at his frankensteinish recreation of a dead girl, he cancels his research afraid of what people might do if they could become completely synthetic, sentient machines. His engineering partner however, suggests ways to keep his discoveries from going to waste- by using them for entertainment purposes

Mostly headed by his partner, the Tomoe family opens a family restaurant business, quickly becoming renown for its state of the art animatronic technology, and by children for its adorable red showgirl

Mamis parents are killed in a sudden accident, leaving her as heiress to the business accompanied only by her stoic, ribbon covered stage singer girlfriend, and the creepy animatronic mechanic

Children start going missing

Mami discovers her fathers old partner has trained her undead android girlfriend to kidnap and murder children in addition to song and dance. Mami thinks thats fucked up

Dude turns on Mami but Kyoko kills him first.

Mami shuts down the business in grief and becomes a recluse, as some time passes she becomes unable to even confide in her girlfriend, now ex as Mami grows up and Kyokos left unaging with an electric brain that can only learn whats programmed, which would be creepy otherwise

A few years later, Madoka Kaname and timid Homura Akemi break into the closed down business. Homuras fondest childhood memories are of this establishment, and Madoka loves Homura very much.

Mami never figured out how to unteach Kyoko how to murder unattended children

Madoka is dead, as Mami frantically apologizes and scolds RoboKyoko and apologizes for the scolded RoboKyoko, Homura figures out what RoboKyoko is, she begs Mami to make Madoka the same. Mami can't pretend she hasn't learned the technology for different motives.

As she slowly rebuilds Madoka, Homura resigns herself to the same fate. She volunteers herself to become as Madoka will so she might always look after her.

Madoka reanimates somewhat more vacant and robotic then Kyoko, she learns the showtunes quickly though. In contrast, Homura is distressingly more aware, though discernably focussed on her only desire to keep Madoka safe. Mayhaps a side effect of being changed when both alive and knowing what was to come.

Considerably more traumatized now, Mami concludes that these girls need something to do with themselves. She reopens the restaurant.

She hires a security guard for the nightshift

Sayaka needed a summer job to distract her from her teenage angst and was pretty willing to work just for free pizza

The animatronics walking around at night and really wanting to get into her office is a great distraction

Sayaka isn't scared of ghosts nor death at this point though so she eventually confronts them. They just want to play with her. They're very lonely in the dark.

Sayaka suddenly recognizes Madoka as a missing girl at her school from a few months back. Sayaka is aware of the missing children rumors back when the place shut down in 87 and connects some dots.

Mami is here to relieve Sayaka of her post

Kyoko has learned that Murder Is Bad.

She stops Mami from harming Sayaka and forces the girls to come to a truce amongst their arguing. Sayaka has to promise not to tell the police about Mamis zombie performers and Mami not to kill her.

They're both lying

Mami leaves to let Sayaka find her way out. Going to the control room she *accidentally* triggers a security door Sayaka was just then walking through

But swiftly after, Homura prys the door open, and Kyoko lifts the unconsious girl and carries her to the lab. All while a ballet dancing Madoka pirouettes after them singing how everythings going to be alright.

Homura gets to saving the nearly eviscerated Sayaka.

Mami is confronted by Kyokos blankly staring face and does not interfere.

Sayaka is given a beautiful sparkling tail, and begrudgingly Mami installs a gel pool into the pirate themes play area. Though she does manage to communicate to Homura that Sayakas voicebox is much too dangerous to carry over

The building reopens the next week, though pirate bay is closed until they can be sure their new member can behave.

Sayaka is not stoic or stiff, she stays put and behaves largely out of the Depression

Mami does not advertise for another night guard

She gets saddled with one though. Two actually, this angry rich girl is very persuasive but really wants her dull boyfriend to be there to help her out.

Hitomi wants to find out what happened to Sayaka.

Kyosuke does not want to be here.

Djjsisjdisishdisus K THERE WE GO

I'll probably draw shit and update with it + a readmore later lmao

Cliffhanger there so I'm not spoiling the entIRE story if I wanna do anything for it later lmao

#pmmm #puella magi madoka magica #fnaf #kyomami #kyoumami #fnaf au #mine #long post #cant wait to see how my fisherman breaks

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jovishark · 4 years ago

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What tags did you even look in to find antihomestar? I just found out about him like a day or two ago

i always like to go through the blogs that reblog my art and i stumbled upon reblogs from other people

i was old enough to read fanfiction by havoc-creations and interact with the authors during their other works and i promise im not just saying all of this because im sentimental and old, im saying that making fun of a ten year old fanfiction is kind of silly? like. we laugh at it still to this day because i think even the authors would agree that some of it is very 2010-esque and also not at all how theyd represent themselves now but. thats what fanworks Are

they represent who you were and your thought process at the time, and the way that things in your life effect your writing yknow? so comparing fanworks from literally ten years in the future directly waters down the impact that the old stuff used to have. opposites attract/oa 20x6 were very obviously a passion project from two friends who felt like writing together. there wasnt a ton of influence from people other than their niche fans. there were other homestar fanworks on like ffnet and da at the time but none of them were as Long or all-encompassing as oa, and none of them really explored the kind of fiction oa did. there was alternate universe travel, time travel, casino shenanigans, Murder, dinosaurs. i think strong bad definitely killed someone in self defense at least twice. dragons for sure.

(the plot, because we arent willing to reupload the fic, is that homestar and strong bad steal alternate universe traveling equipment from homeschool winner and end up humanized in the real world. there was a fanfiction before this called real world runner, where homestar does the same thing and meets a person named alex and also the brothers chaps, and has to get back to the website before it falls apart without him. that branches into oa because alex’s apartment is the home base for all of the characters that come through to look for hr/sb to help save the website a second time. they have to navigate real world events in atlanta georgia while also having to figure out how to get back to their reality, and figure out feelings for each other along the way which of course they do. long story short universe travel is an ever moving target and they meet opposite versions of themselves. i mean Way opposite. antihomestar kills people, including the king of town, and i think antimarzipan eats puppies. antistrong bad wears oven mitts instead of boxing gloves. you get the picture. strong bad is caught between antihomestars edgy pushiness and homestars puppy dog eyes. at some point they go to the middle ages. its a whole mess and basically in trying to put everything back together they make a million more mistakes, and homeschool winner cant fix all of them. its my favorite work of all time)

what im trying to say is that the work represented the authors interests at the time (star trek, dinosaurs, boys kissing and being tsundere about it, very dramatic improbable things, etc) and you could see that it was a Creative work by very creative people. so calling aspects of it uninspired or not creative is a very big slap in the face of something that was pretty shockingly original for its time. i know it sounds ridiculous in the context of 2020, but does it? i saw people yesterday assigning gay culture terms to the rats from animaniacs. everything is just as silly as it was in the entire scope of fanworks.

antihomestar, a character that did not exist before like 2009, was pervasive enough to make it into the real life, actual fan costumes videos from homestarrunner.com. someone cosplayed him and sent it into the brothers chaps, who included it in their photo slideshow with no comment. not to say that giving him black pants, a black star, and blades instead of a propeller isnt Very edgy on purpose, but maybe that was the point? hes Anti homestar. homestar runner, a character who does many things on accident and falls into things as they happen to him, might just wear a propeller hat without a second thought. to be an Anti version, antihomestar would have to do things in a calculated way, on purpose, to achieve results. which he does, as evidenced by him trying to steal universe travel equipment for very on-purpose power reasons. i dont know if their thoughts into him went that deep but id like to think they did. to take a character as vague and for-the-punchline as homestar runner and subvert him, to turn his traits inside out and think of what that person might do if given an opportunity? thats Very creative to me. but then again, i read this fanfiction like every day for years and years until it was deleted from the internet, so maybe these things are more obvious to me because i have the context?

my point is. giving an Unfounded critique based on a thing you have only seen once or twice is just as silly as saying ‘what if homestar runner wore black pants and licked knives for fun’. but one of those things is more enjoyable to look at.

(he also had black straight hair and piercings, because IT WAS 2010 ON LIVEJOURNAL. of course hes going to look like that. he wasnt just made for the aesthetic, he had plot reasons and character development and everything and i just want everyone to know that.)

#shh #h*r #meta #im not sorry about this very long post and please read it to understand me as a person #Anonymous

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shiro-0197 · 4 years ago

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aw shiro, my love, don't worry about it!! i only hope you're okay and safe :d please only reply when you're free, and don't feel bad about it!! >:(

my day yesterday was okay, i've just been relaxing, and studying occasionally. went out to explore a nearby town too, it's so pretty there. and much colder (since it's a highlands) of course!! Today was great too. I bought doughnuts (they're amazing?? I love doughnuts), and I had instant ramen, but it was SO spicy I nearly died. (Three bottles of water later, because someone finished all the milk in the household *cough* me *cough*) and I'm still just reeling. Sucks having such low spice tolerance HAHA. I'm listening to some old school hip-hop rn, while typing this out :D how were your two days?

here are some i'll be using to teach english :d and that would honestly be much appreciated, he's getting on my last nerve rn. (I included the first few, what do you think?)

thats such a priceless feeling i so totally agree. you're so precious 🥺🥺 i'm sure they're prouder thank you imagine. you're so dedicated!! i'm sure all that extra research you've done will definitely pay off. it's good that you know what the job is roughly like, so you'll be really prepared when you finally do start it. you know that one scene, in the 2nd season of the great pretender? when the chinese mafia boss emphasizes the importance of a translator in literally everything? (like that book award example) i may be getting the thing muddled up, but i found that so cool. like yeah, a book or speech could be absolutely beautiful, but if everyone can't enjoy it due to it being a different language, it would be such a shame. i just find translators really important. sorry, i'm really dorky haha 🥺🥺

awww but i think your personality type is wonderful. a lot of my favourite characters are intj (they're all so precious istg grrrr) yes!! i was in a tooru brainrot yesterday too 😭😭😭 (saw a bunch of couples on my walk, and I was like "if only Tooru was real grrrr") and yes?? there'd be so much to learn from each and every one of them. dedication from hinata, savage lines from tsukki, kindness from yams/yachi, how to be a dork 101 from atsumu. aaaah 😭😭i'm sorry they're all so wonderful.

No pftttt I totally feel you. I saw some people without masks today and I was like "bro wtf" and just really loudly said "I sure hope everyone starts following the rules so the cases don't increase" because I'm a lil bitch like that xD

awww okay!! I'll definitely keep that in mind. Mayo makes everything better, tbh >.< aww that's understandable! I don't have specific preferences but hearing the phrase "soggy cheese" makes me want to cry somewhere :( I don't like nuts in chocolate. I'm very passionate about that? XD ikr??

I'm surprised too, I usually never pass on murder, but I guess you're just special like that 👉👈 sir I'd get married to you as many times as you'd like 😼 oops sorry for being cheesy, but—you like cheese ;)

I won't ask why, don't worry. Since I kinda feel the same about Malaysia tbh. It's a love hate relationship, I think HAHA but yeah 😣😣 i don't look up to US at all, and it sucks because people generally do. And I'm just like ;-; why (no offense to Americans tho lol)

is that even legal omg they're so chaotic?? XD how cute tho. Angel does stuff like that all the time too, but I'd never know that when I first met her (she has the most perfect exterior, and then when you get to know her; she's the biggest dork) Schools opening on the 20th, I can't wait to see her then :] (I can, however, wait for the exams which are scheduled for the 25th ugh)

peanut butter is indeed yellow, not up for discussion hehe :) here's my favourite hues!! I love gentle, soft hues like these (pastels) , for yellow; I don't have a favourite. they're all wonderful

ahhh no that's so precious of you!! :)) I'm smiling rn.

yeah skdhskdjsk I'M JUST SO GRRR. Whenever someone goes "hey Ari can you ______" and we both respond?? The tension?? In the air?? Bro skdjskks. 😔🤚 You share a name with one of the most precious characters too tho!!;

This is Shiro from Voltron hehe. I love him so much, just like I love you (tho I'm sure we both know I love you more <3)

I share a name with a book character. His name is Aristotle Mendoza, but his crush-turned-boyfriend calls him "Ari" (which has been my nickname since I was 12). Reading it for the first time was the BEST feeling ever. It's also my favourite book, "Aristotle and Dante discover the secrets of the universe".

—Ari :D (no pfttt I love the tag so much. I have my own tag, that's like the best thing ever 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

Heyyy I'm so sorry for answering so late!! I know you said not to apologize but..... well hmm no excuse I just feel like apologizing, but either way thank you for your patience!!♡ This is the third time I'm rewriting this, and this time I'm doing this in my notes because fuck it😔

Im glad to hear that!! Highlands are always so pretty. Wish we had those here, but it's only steppe here:( Boring~ ooh, donuts!!! They're really good. I havent much, but I tried them like 3 times and they're so good. I really hope I will get to eat more<3 also WHAT'S THOSE NOODLES' NAME I WANNA KNOW- Are you feeling okay now, though? XD

My days were nice!!! Felt as if I had been hiding three bodies, but I've been feeling better lately. We had online school yesterday so I'm excused from the errands for the half of the day, thankfully. But your messages make me very happy. Though I dont always feel like writing a response (or I get stressed because it doenst save) so very sorry for that😔

Ohh those look so pretty!! I'd totally join to just look at them. The colors are so nice🥺 it looks like one of our olympiad prep slides, though better. I dont have the screenshots sadly😩 Either way I really love the little details like the squiggly thingies or the Ж .... they seem unnecessary but the energy changes a lot without them hehe

I really hope they will be🥺 that'd mean a lot to me. And I'm also really hopeful itll work out. I really don't wanna disappoint my family, which is literally just one person. The less people there are, the more it hurts, you know?

Yeah, that scene meant so much to me!! I dknt remember much, but I was very happy they said something like that, because I've been told being a translator wont work out for me. Now look at me, I'm about to tell them to fuck themselves<3 I was also so surprised to see Laurent know that many languages ..... I aspire to be like him😩 And honestly, I havent though so deep of that but you opened my eyes and now I'm about to float off into the next universe😭 dont apologize though, its very cute!!!♥︎♥︎

Heheh, I guess you're right.. every single anime INTJ is a silent sexy mastermind and I love them . ... YEAH every single time I see a passing couple i cry because I dont have anyone 😡💔 and sometimes when I see people doing something amusing (which includes people failing cuz I'm evil) I just imagine one of the characters doing that and I smile all the way xD Honestly, I'd sell my father on black market for a single day with one of them:( though that may sound like a really low price because his cigarette filled lungs wouldnt cost a lot... I sound like my 7th grade self again I'm so sorry

BAHQHHANEJWJD I HOPE THEY WERE EMBARRASED. I HOPE THEY FELT AWKWARD AND OTHER PEOPLE DID TOO, they deserve it. Like, learn your lesson bitch, it's been a year!

Yeah!!! I love mayo, not to the point where I would gulp it down from the package, but it does make dishes taste good. Same, soggy cheese on itself sounds like a dish served in the ninth circle of hell. You should try nuts in honey!! Like, just straight up dip them in honey. Sounds weird, and it doesnt always taste NEJFJKSKF (depends on the honey)but I think it's worth trying xD Walnuts are the best with honey I think

That was so funny ... TOO FUNNY, I LAUGHED FOR LIKE . 3MINUTES STRAIGHT and I do not laugh when I'm tired. You really are special 😭😭😭😭 cheesy ... HAHRNFJJSF

I'm so sorry for being a bully like that but it's so funny how you left a single U there . Its so mysterious, was it in purpose? Or were you lost in the excitement if messaging me?

I was one of those people, honestly 😭 but mostly because I wasnt aware of its political condition, I guess. Maybe theres more than just politics that's bad about US, but honestly, it has more opportunities than this hellfire. Though now I'm more into Norway and Japan. Really wanna travel there :(

Heheh, yeah, we never really show off to strangers at first. I dont know what exactly I mean by we, but you get my point ♡ Good luck though!! I hope it goes well for you<3

Oh they looks so pretty!! They're really wonderful. Like bubblegum and cotton candy and literally anything sweet... it's so cute !!! And I totally agree, there isnt a bad yellow.

HAHAH, honestly, that reminds me of how there were 4 people with the same name in my class, and whenever the teacher did the attendance thing, they would all stand up. Teachers usually dont say the last names, so we always gotta ask which person they mean if theres more than one person with that name, so yeah.. That happened on accident at first, but then they just did it for trolling xD

OH MY GOD HES SO PRETTY? HES SO PRECIOUS?? HUHHH??? I gotta thank Kuro for this wonderful opportunity of sharing a name with someone like .... him🥺

Oh that's so cool!! Also, he has a boyfriend ... I really need to start reading xD it's so cute though! It sounds like such a good book, I'm glad you share a name with him, hehe!!

I also share my real name with one of the characters in a kids' show, and its SO ugly, I'm in pain. Every time my friends see one of those on TV they go

Which is a pain in the ass, it's so embarrassing...........

Awh, okay!! I'm glad you love it, cuz I do too. Because it's your name.... cuz I love u. That was so lame PLEASEJWJDJSJF I HOPE YOUR DAY WAS GREAT !!! LOVE YOU

#Ari💕#💞💞💝💝💗💖💗💖💕💝💕💝💓💖💗💖💓💖💕💖💞💓💝💕💝💖💓💖💗💖💞💝💕💘💕💘💖💖💗💖💓💖💖💞💖💝💕💘💘💗💝💗💖💓💖💞💖

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shootycatfishgame · 5 years ago

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Well its done, "Shooty and the Catfish Episode 2: The Spoopies" is finally out in the wild for people to play, why you can even play it yourself for free if you head on over here: https://visitorsfromdreams.itch.io/shootycatfish-episode2 Truth be told the game has been out for 3 days now and has only been downloaded a grand total of 4 times. It might seem like a discouraging number for sure but its important to remember that this is the second episode of a series, and with the first episode itself only being downloaded a total of 124 times to date (my previous project Hazmat is sitting at 525 downloads and Flatwoods at 849 downloads) its not that surprising. In all honesty im not really expecting the series to really gain any sort of momentum until its fully finished and released as a stand alone product on Steam, and I think thats fair enough. The idea behind the episodic releases was largely so I could get the feedback to improve each episode as the project went along, and I think I have achieved that so far. So I guess you could consider this to be a post mortem. Where did things go right with Episode 2 and where did they go wrong? Well, for where things went right, development started in March and was finished in September so you could say the game had a 7 month development cycle. Looking back at it now due to the length of the episode that actually feels really excessive considering the amount of content in the actual game (which I will come back too) but compared to the first episodes 2 year development cycle it was a huge improvement. I am also pretty happy with how the games set up worked. Episode 1 played it very strait with its single town and non linear dungeon set up taken right from the standard JRPG guidebook. Episode 2 on the other hand was a little more experimental. The opening town was more about establishing a tone then a solid narrative with the Episodes dungeon being where all of the real story telling happens. While im sure this isnt a new idea, its something I havent personally experienced in any turn based RPGs. Sure, its not uncommon to find environmental story telling packed into the game world, but to have every combat encounter also be an NPC that pushes the narrative forward? I think the results were perhaps a little wordy and at times a bit on the nose, but for the most part I think it works. Episode 1 had a very non linear dungeon which worked well but it was nice working on something a little more directed as well which Episode 2's layout definitely was.

Im really happy without how the quality of life improvements in the game turned out, introducing new elements like coded doors for different kinds of keys and giving you the option of finishing the game without fighting the optional boss which, you know, actually made that optional boss optional. In fact I was so happy with those changes I went back and patched them into Episode 1 only a couple weeks back.

So where did things go wrong?

Well, to be honest, the only thing I wasnt happy with was how long it took me to get this game out. Like I said, 7 months is a big improvement compared to 2 years, but its still a lot longer than it should have been. Some of this was definitely my fault... as mentioned above there was a big push to have all the narrative put into the dungeon, but the down side of that was that it meant there was a lot more meaningful dialogue in this Episode than there was in Episode 1. The previous Episodes dialogue was mostly made up of silly gags from goofy NPCs in town, but for this Episode I had to create that ALONG with the more serious and narrative driven dialogue found in the dungeon itself. There were several weeks where I didnt touch the game at all because it all seemed so daunting. Ironically when I finally forced myself to write those sections it ended up only taking me 2 nights, so really I spent weeks if not months putting the project off out of fear of something that ended up taking collectively 6 hours tops.

So yeah... that explains some of the delay, but not all of it. The second issue that struck me during the development of this Episode was my own insecurity. The first 5 months this games development were during a time when I didnt know what was happening with my job, I was very nervous, and with my fiance being processed through the notoriously awful Australian immigration system I was also pretty damn scared. The last few weeks of those 5 months was a massive period of crunch at work for a huge project and then immediately it was over... and I was out of a job. If I had known for sure that this was how the gig would have turned out I would have spent more of my free time trying to develop a following. I might have even been able to get my Patreon into a state that could have helped me out financially a little, or atleast thats what I liked to think I would have done, but at the time I didnt have the confidence or energy to do so. This was followed with me taking up a freelance project (well quite a few actually but most were great) which while it has definitely paid my bills over the last couple of months, it has also left me exhausted, emotionally and physically. All of this slowed down the development of the game, and perhaps even more importantly had a large impact on the writing of it.

"Shooty and the Catfish: Episode 2 - The Spoopies" deals with some pretty heavy themes, with suicide and the treatment of suicide victims being chief amoung them. Then on top of that I realised half way through development that while the idea of an office building full of ghosts of asshole business people who commited suicide after a stock market crash does have some comedic value (poor taste as it may be), the gameplay loop of systematically killing every single one of those ghosts has absolutely no comedic value and is quite possibly the most morbid thing I had ever created... Ironically not even on purpose... I found myself in a situation where I accidently created a "suicide victims ghost murder simulator". While im no stranger to creating offensive or disturbing content, for once this wasnt my intention but rather the result of the games story concept clashing with the established gameplay mechanics... and realising too late. What do you do when you set out to make a dumb comedy about 2 wise cracking idiots that kill monsters for money and instead... well here we are. What a mess... Im not going to pretend that the game handles the subject of suicide well and I also dont think I ever could approach the subject in a satisfying way. If its treatment upsets or offends anyone I think thats completely understandable and any critism I receive because of it is completely justified. Something I do think that is a positive to come out of all this however is this is the first game project I have worked on that I feel, to me personally, is a piece of "art". Well I mean... I think all games are art, but playing through this game now I can see the struggle I was going through developing it reflected through the characters and through the writing. Its almost like playing through 5 months of my own loose streamed consciousness. My stress, my depression, my insecurity, my fear, my defeatism, its all there. The game has tonal whiplash of morbid nihilism and stupid dumb goofy comedy in a way I havent been able to pull of since my 2014 film Spilt Coffee (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jp2HSx_f9WE) which ironically serves as a prequel to this game and was created at a time of my life when again, I felt quite trapped. Episode 2 might be the worst game I have made to a lot of people and thats totally fair, but I think its also my most personal and sincere for what thats worth. Thats it for this update, I have gone on long enough as it is. So where do we go from here? Well... I made myself and my players a promise at the end of Episode 2, and thats that Episode 3 will be a fun light hearted adventure. I think after this games development I really need it, and hopefully the contents of this depressing Episode doesnt stop those players from coming with me on that adventure too. If your interested in helping me support my indie game development then why not check out my Patreon? https://www.patreon.com/VisitorsFromDreams Every little bit helps ~ <3

Thanks again to everyone who has taken the time to read this post.

#rpgmaker #RPG Maker #indie game #Indiegame #post mortem #pixel art #pixelart

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blookmallow · 5 years ago

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skyrim misadventures, ft Weird Magic Stuff, a determined spite mission, and some spooky encounters

-----

still absolutely love this guy

[me, the leader of the brotherhood, who just assassinated the fucking emperor a few weeks ago] oh we’re not, huh

sighs i really want to do the thieves guild storyline but i dont want to work with the slimeball scam elixir guy to run a decent dude out of business for no reason... i like brand-shei hes my friend :(

i might not go through with it on this file, i definitely will with my khajiit though if nothing else

i know having a khajiit thief character is way obvious lmao but

nice

NICE

i forget which quest this was but I FOUND A SKELETON DRAGON????? IVE NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE

holy SHIT thats so many skeletons

i got SO many skulls in here

i also found this spooky hand, but couldnt figure out anything to do with it yet, unless its just here for Ominous Mage Experiments Gone Wrong purposes

anyway all this was on a quest to find the augur, which nobody wanted to talk about and kept going “ohh yeah.... he Used To Be a student.... until..... The Accident” and i was losing my MIND trying to imagine what kind of horrific thing this guy got turned into but then i finally found him and

:/ hes just a big glowy ball

which, i mean, is cool and all, but i was hoping for like, a dude who turned himself inside out or became some eldritch horror or something

through all these winterhold quests i started finally getting half decent at magic (not like, Good, but acceptably ok) and decided to finally go back for that one disastrous cidnha mine quest ive been avoiding

you get thrown in the markarth prison mines with nothing and gotta find a way to escape, which can be accomplished without too much trouble if you band together with your fellow inmates, however, they are fucking forsworn and will start murdering everyone near them once they escape with you

i dont know if that keeps you stuck with a bounty in markarth or not, but i REALLY didnt want to release the forsworn leader out into the world, or be friends with those fuckers, or ruin my reputation, or risk civilian casualties even though theres not really that many people i care particularly about in markarth now that muiri is safe is solitude, so. i had previously just reloaded a save and ignored the quest for ages

because like. i dont think you Can get out on your own and if you try to turn on them and fight once you make your escape its REALLY hard to survive bc they outnumber you and you dont have any armor or anything other than like, shitty prison shivs

however: the guards cannot take away your magic or your shouts, so

this time i was fucking ready, i have the ability to summon a FRIEND now to fight with me (i dont know what would’ve happened if i had a companion with me during this mess but like. i can Make one), i learned how to make a magic sword so id at least have some kind of halfway decent weapon, and ive got healing magic

cool dragon powers also help (this was from. later on bc i have my stuff in this shot but)

this was still hard as shit, lucien got defeated pretty early on, and with no magicka potions its really hard to keep healing while fighting but i eventually fucking DID IT, i killed every single forsworn prisoner including madanach, and escaped myself (which granted me a pardon and some kind of special ring i dont care about from the silverbloods)

i mentioned this misadventure to my dad later and he legitimately didnt know it was even possible to do this lmao i was VERY determined not to help the forsworn ever in any way

those guys ruin my day every five minutes when im out anywhere near their camps even if i try to avoid them like the plague i hate them!!

i kept the shivs though and later discovered

you can enchant them

LOOK at this cavern!!!!!!!

also i ran into a fucking headless horseman ??????

i didnt even know he was there until i heard lucien unsheathing his weapon when he saw it behind me and i looked to see what he was concerned about

i followed him for ages like halfway across the map but eventually i had so many bandits and wolves and also a dragon chasing after me i lost sight of him after a while :’| WILD though

not that im ever going to sell it but i cant help noticing the blade of woe is worth 666 gold,

cicero’s always mentioning he wants skyforge steel so i bought him a skyforge dagger and enchanted it for him (i think i put silent moons enchantment on it, i forget), finally remembered to give it to him but didnt take back the other dagger i gave him before to see if he’d pick which one he wants to use and here he is using his new one.... baby likes his present im so glad,

granted its probably just like, an automatic npc thing to just use whatever weapon has the best stats but i like to think he likes it

he still says the line all the time he doesn’t have like. special dialogue if you Do give him skyforge steel or anything but still

anyway i also had this mission going for boethiah where i was supposed to. bring her a sacrifice, essentially. which, yeah, ok, obvious bad idea, but im already an assassin, whats the difference at this point right

my first thought was to go hire a random mercenary at windhelm, since many of the most unpleasant people in skyrim seem to live there, and i figured the chances were pretty good hes racist and insufferable like the others

but we ended up killing a dragon together and god damn it hes actually a nice guy, i like him :’) so we’re friends now after all

however, boethiah still needed a sacrifice, and. there’s this drunk guy in markarth you can hire after you defeat him in a brawl, and. he doesn’t seem to have a lot going on in his life other than shit tons of mead, so. i figured he’d do :’ )

holy FUCK

i dont regret carrying out this quest bc like... A) it was really cool and B) -

i eventually got this fuckin SICK armor out of it that ups my stealth while actually being pretty legit defense, and it poisons any enemies that come near me but somehow doesnt poison friendly npcs which is WILD and incredibly convenient for when im getting mobbed but dont want to accidentally murder whatever companion i have with me at the time

i do feel bad about sacrificing cosnach though like. he was little more than a random drunk guy but that doesn’t mean he deserved it, y’know :’ ) i couldn’t find anyone i hated that would also follow me though

also i later discovered on the wiki you can actually marry that guy, and im just like. why, out of all the options you have in skyrim, would you go for “random drunk dude who gets in bar fights”

i dunno maybe he grows on you if you fight with him for a while but i didnt want to get attached again :’)

i found wisps??? i think?????? i couldnt figure out any way to interact with them but they glow and bounce around and i LOVE them

woah!!!!!!

i. dont remember what was in there but apparently the wisps really wanted me to find it

(i do remember getting stuck in this room and couldn’t figure out how to get the door to open though so i just kinda backtracked and left the way i came in, dunno if i missed anything important or if it was just an alternate way out that i couldnt figure out)

#lucy plays skyrim

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ibangtanthings · 7 years ago

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Vampires Will Never Hurt You - pt 4

A week later, the entire school found out about the breakup. Jin was no where to be seen.

Typical...

It was back to square one again.

All of a sudden, you were invisible to everyone just like that. No one wanted to risk getting on Jin's bad side in case you guys weren't on friendly terms anymore.

Everyone except Jungkook at least. He was having a hard time as well.

Before he left, Jin came clean to Jungkook about the blood hungry, murderer side he was hiding.

"He said he was a vampire. I mean, he's crazy right? He said he wasn't lying but how could I believe him. Is he on drugs?"

"Hey, can we not talk about Jin for like the rest of the year?"

"Okay." He said taking a seat quietly.

You sat down across from him and the sun was shining down into his eyes.

Internally, you giggled at him because he was too shy to risk upsetting you even more by asking to change tables.

Or maybe he thought you were crazy for being so calm about everything.

"So what do you want to talk about?" He asked slightly squinting.

A twinge of guilt formed in your heart after realizing that you were on the beginnings of taking it out on him.

"I don't know? Anything else besides him....come here." You patted the empty space next to you.

He quickly sat beside you and picked at his lunch.

"Are you okay?" He asked, genuinely concerned. "Did he freak you out?"

You took a deep breath and shook your head. "No he didn't freak me out....mostly because...he really is a vampire..."

"A vampire? Y/N, are you serious right now?" He retorted.

His smile showed a lot of concern.

Yup...he thought you were crazy.

"You shouldn't be so surprised, you know what happened with the shaman. The shaman is also the one who turned Jin into a vampire."

He squinted on purpose this time and looked at you, puzzled.

"Kookie....you know it's possible. I mean this dude made all of your friends forget about Jin. How do you forget a person you've been growing up with your whole life? That shaman predicted all the bad things that were going to happen. He had powers and he used those powers to kill Jin. Scratch that. It was Taehyung who killed Jin. Taehyung made a deal with the shaman."

"Taehyung?"

"He killed his father and Jin went to help him. Jin brought Taehyung to the shaman and the shaman offered him a deal. If he killed Jin, then he and the rest of you guys would live happily ever after but Jin, he died and he became a vampire. Jin is living a cursed life in exchange for the happiness of everyone else, including you. Just your luck that a ridiculously rich oil tycoon adopted you no?"

He hung onto your every word, eyebrows furrowed in concentration and confusion.

"Almost all of us were supposed to die..." he said quietly, "I was nearly in a coma after I got jumped. Jimin was in a coma for a week. Namjoon was going to be sent to one of the worst prisons in the state. Yoongi was almost burned alive. Hosoek somehow survived the overdose..."

"And Jin became a vampire."

His mouth opened in awe as he started to realize that you were telling the truth.

"He didn't prove it to you? All he had to do was show you his fangs. His veins turn dark under his skin. It's insane."

"Wait. How long have you known?" He asked questioningly, sounding almost betrayed.

Suddenly you felt all the pain at once again. You recalled meeting him and falling in love all over again. You know from the moment you met him.

It was hard to believe that it was all over now.

"Y/N, if this is all true then...Jin's dangerous isn't he? He could hurt-" his expression was serious now, watching you carefully and eyes full of concern, "He could hurt you. Has he hurt you before? Like physically?"

You looked away quickly. "Jungkook. You're asking a lot of questions."

Jungkook's eyes went wide. "Y/N, did he hurt you before?"

You chuckled and decided to entertain his idea. "Let's say he did. What would you do? Why would you do anything? He's a vampire."

"Because that's what friends do Y/N. I need to protect you from him. Vampire or not, I won't let someone or something hurt you ever again."

He didn't know the half of it. The burn for Jin's bite and his love.

Yet here he was, wanting to protect you. He wanted to say so much more but he was so caught off guard at the thought of Jin doing something to you.

"We broke up. It's over now. It doesn't matter anymore. I'm okay Kookie, I'm just sad." You assured him.

"It is over." he said, and you were about to burst into tears. "You're better off without him."

"It's always harder without him."

"Don't lie to yourself. You had a hard time whether he was here or not. If he hurt you emotionally and physically....how could you continue to love him so much? You deserve better."

"He lost his life for you, for his friends." You defended him. "He's never hurt me intentionally."

"So he has hurt you?" Jungkook asked, freaking out. "Did he bite you whenever he felt like it? Did you think that was okay?" He asked pushing away his lunch.

Your appetite had diminished since the break up. Jungkook seemed to be in shock and it wasn't hard to guess what he thought about you now.

Only a crazy person would fall in love with a vampire.

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"Are you really in love with him or the fact that he's a vampire."

You felt the hot tears stream down your cheeks. "I can't stop thinking about how messed up this all is. To you, it might seem like I'm crazy but I don't care. I don't want to be apart from him...But the things he said, I can't stop thinking about that either."

"Don't stop thinking about it. You need to see him for who he really is. A monster....What did he tell you? What did he say to you Y/N?"

You wanted to yell at Jungkook, at the top of your lungs. Jin wasn't a monster.

But those last two questions brought you right back to the night Jin broke your heart.

"That he'll never turn me, that he'll never miss me and that he'll never remember me. And when I looked into his eyes, there was nothing left. I can't believe he said that to me. Why would he want to hurt me like that?"

A huge part of you knew that he was trying to protect you, and himself actually.

He was always afraid of losing you but the whole relationship was doomed, and it was always obvious. It always felt too good to be true from a human perspective.

Jin always seemed too good to be true.

"He won't turn you? Y/N, why would a vampire fall in love with a human? With food?" Jungkook asked.

"Food?" You repeated, feeling nothing but pain.

If Jin was here, he'd be furious.

Of would he?

Was it all a lie? How he felt? Was he only pretending to love you all this time?

"I just...feel something for you..."

"Are you in love with me Y/N?" He asked.

You looked into his eyes and wondered how this could ever be okay.

"Can I be in love with you?"

He took a step closer and touched your cheek. You were love struck and in awe.

"You can Y/N, the real question is, can you not?"

"Why?" You asked as if your pleading.

"Because it's dangerous, and because it will be hard to stop."

"Why would I want to stop loving you. Even if you stop loving me, I'll always love you."

"Thats such a human thing to say." He smiled, kissing your forehead. Then he broke contact and took a seat.

You stayed on your feet, pacing back and forth past the huge windows that had a beautiful view of the beach even this late at night. No wonder he was always home.

"I'm not in love with a vampire, don't think this is just my obsession as a human. I'm in love with you Jin. And I think you love me too. That's why you haven't left. That's why you haven't killed me."

He didn't say anything.

"If I died, how would you feel?"

His calm expression became hard and slightly confused.

"What if I said I never wanted to see you again? I can leave any day I want. To another place, or to another country. I don't need to be a vampire to disappear from someone's life."

"If you said you never wanted to see me again, I would disappear. You wouldn't have to leave this town, not because of me."

"I don't need your pity, I just......" you sighed. "Never mind. That's probably why you haven't killed me...not because you love me, because you pity me...how could you fall in love with food?"

In the blink of an eye, your back was pinned against one of the windows.

His face closer than ever and you kept your eyes from studying his features as he glared down at you.

"Don't ever call yourself food. I wouldn't even think about feeding on you as a...meal...I'm not a monster."

"I know. So stop acting like one." You whispered, fighting the urge to touch his face, yet your heart raced from fear, you couldn't help it.

"Fine. I'll admit it. I get worried when you don't eat. I'm scared you'll fall and break an arm, or get into a car accident one day. I like seeing you smile and I always want to know what you're up to. But loving you would be selfish and irresponsible. You're just human and fragile."

"I want you to be selfish. It's okay Jin." You reached up to touch his cheek but you hesitated and touched his chest instead. "You have a heart too. You're not a monster....I'm sorry this happened to you."

He looked away for a moment.

He seemed....stunned. Maybe no one had ever felt sorry for him. He was also flustered and possibly too upset.

"I think you should go. I'll see you tomorrow." He said giving you a kiss on the cheek.

"Jin I need to hear you say it, please." You whispered.

He kissed your lips delicately. It was the first kiss of many. So gentle and loving.

He finally silently submitted to his feelings.

"I love you Jin." You blushed,

"I love you too. I'm sorry."

"Hey. Y/N. I'm sorry. Forget I said anything. We can stop talking about him." Jungkook said wiping your tears away.

You snapped back into reality and stared right back into Jungkook's innocent eyes.

"What did you say?" You asked him.

"I said I'm sorry Y/N, please don't cry. Not over him...You want me to take you home?"

"No." You shook your head. "I just want to feel normal again. I want to forget about him."

"We can do stuff, get your mind off everything." He looked around the campus grounds. "How about Homecoming?"

"Homecoming?" You asked is disbelief. "Sure. You want to be my date? We can ditch the dance early if you want to."

"I'm down. I'll even buy you pancakes at the diner afterwards. Breakfast for dinner and some milkshakes. Normal stuff."

You smiled, feeling a bit better. "Breakfast for dinner isn't normal."

"So we'll make our own rules for normal." He said with a shrug.

You nodded and he reached for you hand. He studied your hand and looked down at it as he spoke.

"I don't like seeing you upset Y/N. Don't worry so much. I'm going to protect you from everything and everyone, I promise. Jin can go fuck himself."

"Thanks Kookie." You said biting back another smiled, lacing your fingers into his. It just felt soothing and natural for once.

_________________

"She calls him Kookie, I'm so jealous. First Jin now Jungkook? So lucky."

"Maybe she's good in bed? They were friends, maybe Jungkook got curious and Jin's letting him have a go at it?"

"You guys are stupid. Obviously she's the one having a go at it."

You heard everything from outside the door. Once they were finally done, you found the courage to enter the classroom and take a seat.

In comes Jungkook with two balloons and a cupcake. Just like that, you forgot about everything they said.

"Hey beautiful, happy birthday. Hurry blow out the candle."

You blew out the imaginary candle and he place the cupcake down on the table before bear hugging you off the ground and into a spin.

"Happy Birthday Y/N!" The other girls said from their seats with fake enthusiasm.

Others in the class followed.

You thanked them before focusing your attention on Jungkook again.

Taking a seat, you looked up at the cool birthday balloons, clear but filled with glitter and beads.

"Thanks Kookie. These are cool."

"Pose birthday girl, I need pictures to show how awesome I am." He said pulling out his cell phone.

You lowered the balloons closer to your face and held the cupcake up as he snapped a few pictures.

He leaned in and opened his mouth and while he expected you to to pretend to feed him, you flipped the cupcake upside down and smothered his lips with frosting.

You giggled as he sighed, giving you an angry glare as he formulated his revenge, which only took a second as he kissed your cheek.

"Kookie!" You laughed, wiping away the frosting on your cheeks.

He just continued to take pictures.

You both heard the class quiet down and turned to see if the professor had walked in but it was Jin, handsome as ever in a suit and tie.

He had a pretty decent sized bouquet of roses in his hands and he began walking towards you and Jungkook.

"Hyung, what are you doing here?" He asked, standing up.

"I'm here to see Y/N. Can I talk to her for a minute?" He looked at you. "Happy birthday princess." He said handing over the bouquet.

"The professor's going to be here any minute." Jungkook said.

"It's fine Kookie, I'll be right back." You left the flowers on the table and gave Jungkook one last glance.

You followed Jin down the hall and into an empty room. A million questions ran through your mind.

The first...

Did he need to feed?

"I'm sorry Y/N. About everything I said last week....I want to take you to Homecoming, before I leave town for a while."

"You're leaving?" Jungkook asked, closing the door behind him.

You didn't even hear him come in but Jin probably did. Why didn't he say anything?

Jungkook was keeping his promise to protect you. That made you feel less alone...

"Can you leave us alone for one moment or is that too difficult for you to understand?" Jin glared at him.

"Don't you think it's a little to late to be apologizing." Jungkook said, stepping in front of you.

"You know, everything started going wrong the moment we met again. I have to keep reminding myself not to kill you." Jin threatened.

"Jin." You said stepping to Jungkook's side. "I'm going to Homecoming with Kookie...but the dance isn't you're going away party, why are you leaving? What's wrong?"

He sighed, reaching into his pocket and the he gave you a key.

"It's yours. I don't know when I'll be back. I'm sorry Y/N."

And this time he was really walking away.

"No, Jin." You reached out for him but Jungkook stopped you.

"Let me go. Jin..." You called as he walked out the door. Jungkook held you back against your will.

You turned to look at him and you wanted to escape from his grip so badly. "How could you do that? What's wrong with you? Let me go Jungkook."

"He's not good for you Y/N. Let him go."

"Something's wrong, I need to help him."

Jungkook cupped your face and wiped your tears away. "It was now or after Homecoming, he was leaving you anyway."

"Then I'd rather have him until then. It's my choice not yours. Now let me go." You pulled yourself away from him.

"I'm just trying to protect you, Y/N."

"He gave his life for you, even after you ran away from all your problems. For Taehyung, who had no problem killing him."

"And now Jin wants to kill me." Jungkook said. "I'm not exactly sure if I should be so grateful."

You took a deep breath and thought for a moment. Jungkook was right. If Jin gave you the key to his house, then he's done. He was leaving you, no matter what.

But you left him first...

But he came back...

Despite what Jungkook said, you'd do anything to help Jin, even if it was dangerous.

Jin wasn't one to run away like this. No matter what.

"He wouldn't leave so suddenly. I have to find out what's going on."

"How? I won't let you put yourself in danger."

You felt the key in your hand and played with it for a few moments.

He didn't understand.

"I won't be in danger if you just come with me, to his house. There has to be some answers there. Let's just start there. If you want to protect me that's fine but I'd rather have your help. Are you coming or not?"

_____

He didn't take anything. Everything was untouched and just the same as usual.

This only furthered your suspicions that maybe Jin was fleeing from something.

"What are we looking at?" Jungkook watched as you raided the small office in the basement.

"His notes. What he's researched. He's met a lot of vampires over the years and it seems like they don't know as much as he'd like."

"Jin killed the only guy who could give him answers, the only guy who could possible fix this." Jungkook exclaimed.

You flipped to the most recent pages of notes.

"He said his hunger has been increasing." You looked at the names of all the people he killed recently.

At least twice a week he drained a body.

"Y/N that's only one page the rest are here. There's three pages just for last month."

You looked at the papers in Jungkook's hand and your heart raced. There were so many names.

"He never needed this much blood before...."

Suddenly, Jungkook smacked the papers down and looked at you, wide eyed and nervous.

"We aren't supposed to be looking at this."

"I know. But he left the whole house untouched. This is the only way we can figure out what's going on. What did you see Jungkook?" You asked, trying to pull the papers out of his hand.

He didn't let go. "He really can't control his hunger. He's extremely dangerous Y/N. That's why he left. That's why he let you go. He's scared of killing you, for real."

"No. He can't kill me. He just can't. He can't even try......even now that it's over, I don't think he's capable of really hurting me, like ever. Love is a powerful thing Jungkook."

"Enough to overcome hunger? You're not getting near him again, I need you to understand that." He said gravely. "I just have a bad feeling about everything."

You put the papers down and tried really hard not to cry again. Without hesitation he pulled you into a hug.

"I just want to help." You breathed. "Something's wrong. I can't just let him go."

His clothes still smelled like laundry soap.

"Jungkook, I need to know what's going on. I feel like I'm losing my mind. Living without him, being here in this empty house, it just doesn't feel right. Jin made this his home. You should know what it feels like to lose everything. I'm not letting him go through the same fate, are you?"

He pulled you away. "You're right Y/N, but what if you find out something you don't like?"

"He tells me everything. I know more bad than good but I love him. We have to keep looking."

You went into the bedroom and searched everywhere.

Jin always kept a journal where he wrote down his thoughts and while it wasn't a secret, it was just a private thing.

"He probably took it." Jungkook sighed.

"Got it. It was in his closet."

Before you could give it a second thought or let your conscious stop you, Jungkook opened the book and went to the last pages.

He quietly read the lines out loud.

"Yesterday, Jungkook took Y/N to the park and she smiled at him the way she smiled at me....." he looked up at you.

"Keep reading, he gets jealous easily." You began to fidget with your fingers.

"Last time she smiled at me, I couldn't even think about ever hurting her. But the days leading up to the fight, I wanted to bite her. To drink as much blood as I could or until I was satisfied. Just being close to her was a challenge. I began to salivate, formulating a plan to get her away from Jungkook just for a moment. To get a small taste. Take small tastes each time so that I won't overwhelm her." Jungkook paused.

"He's craving my blood..." you wondered why now?

"It takes two to three bodies a week for me to feel full. I did something bad....but it wasn't on purpose. I went out of state lines, I went as far North as I thought necessary. She was there. In Canada. Who knows why but I wish she hadn't been. Now she's dead. I hurt Y/N indirectly and I'm too ashamed to show her my face."

"Jungkook where's the list?" You asked with a trembling voice.

"Y/N...."

"Jungkook, please tell me it's not true." You whimpered, on the verge of a panic attack.

"The worst part is my hunger leads me further away from home and somehow closer to the place I used to call home. The closer I get, the more my hunger dominates. Which home is safe now? What's to stop me from killing everyone? I can't face Y/N because I really am becoming a monster."

"Shut up." You begged.

"I'm going to see my old friends. I have to see them. Jungkook started this. I'm going to end it."

"Jungkook give me the stupid list. She's not on it. You're making this up."

He looked up at you. For the first time you saw him as anything but friendly. He was serious and determined.

"He killed her....Jin killed Melody and he's going to kill all of us. He's saving me for last. Isn't that proof enough? He's a murderer Y/N...a monster."

"No. No way. He's not a monster. How many times do I have to say it? He wouldn't do that to me. He's lying." You whimpered.

"No Y/N....he killed her...and he looked into your eyes and pretended that everything was fine when he got back, because that's what he chose to do. He didn't have an ounce of guilt pretending to be innocent. He killed an innocent girl!"

You stepped away from him and sank down into a corner.

"Call your friends Jungkook...tell them to run." You said between sobs.

Jungkook sat down next to you and quickly made some calls. His explanation was vague, but he convinced all of them to leave town. He invited them to his house. A reunion.

You sobbed and replayed memory after memory of Jin. All the times he proved to you that he wasn't a monster, that he loved you.

How could he have killed her?

Why didn't he call you? You could have talked him down. If he was losing control you could have helped him.

You just wanted to wrap your arms around him and tell him it was okay. That you'll figure something out together. That he didn't have to do this alone.

But after a while you just stopped thinking about him altogether. You cried for the sake of crying.

It was as if you were there alone.

Jungkook spoke to you but it made no sense. It felt like you were dreaming.

You closed your eyes, half asleep as Jungkook pulled you up onto your feet and led you to the couch.

You were glad he didn't take you to Jin's room.

Jungkook said something and left.

For a while you felt at peace.

___________

Jungkook was the star of the school now.

He was charming and funny, good at talking to people and sometimes it seemed like people liked him more than they liked Jin.

But no one talked to you anymore. They made the effort but you just couldn't deal with them.

The fake concern, the fake smiles.

You were a ghost, shadowing Jungkook and keeping to yourself.

They genuinely like Jungkook but you didn't want to force them to like you. Jin shoved you down their throats, Jungkook protected you from them.

"Hey, are you hungry?" He smiled softly.

You shook your head. "I'm just gonna leave early today."

"No. Y/N, stay." He said holding your hands. "Homecoming is this weekend, you promised to go with me. Do you even have a dress?"

"Jungkook, I don't know if I want to go anymore."

"Hey, you wanted normal right? Let's have fun. It's just one night to take your mind off everything. Please? I sound like your girlfriend right now, cmon." He pouted.

"Fine...but I'm still skipping class so I can go shopping."

He trapped you in his arms and kissed your cheek gratefully. "I promise we'll have fun. You won't regret this...Here." He pulled out his card.

"No, Kook, Jin gave me a card already."

He let go of you. "I know I don't show off as much as he does but I'm rich too, remember?"

"Well I already have a lot of dresses."

"Dresses he bought you? No way. You're my date for this Homecoming so buy yourself a new dress. I was thinking of wearing navy."

"Should I too? Or white? Or both? And some red maybe? I don't have a lot of time." You whined.

He laughed, "You'll look perfect in whatever you decide to wear. I will too. Try not to fall in love."

"Okay." You giggled. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Buy whatever you want okay? You know, matching earrings and what not. Do your nails, get a facial, I don't know, just have time for yourself."

"Thanks Kookie." You attacked him with your own hug. "I'll try not to max it out."

He laughed. "Have fun gorgeous."

As you drove towards the mall, you thought about the last time you had a day all to yourself.

It was about two winters ago when you bought expensive ice cream and a slice of cake. Instead of sitting down at the fancy tables, the place was so crowded, you had to take it home.

You were at that point in which nothing felt weird with Jungkook. You didn't feel guilty using his card, you never felt embarrass either.

While you didn't share everything with him, you weren't scared to tell him anything.

You just needed more time to process everything. To figure out whether or not you wanted to tell Jungkook more about the bad between you and Jin.

The more you hung out with Jungkook the more you realized the bad between you and Jin.

There were things you both gave into often.

Loving Jin was intense but it was worth it.

"You look hot like that."

"Like how?" He asked, head resting against he wall, his eyes closed and heavy breaths. A trail of blood falling from his lips.

"Like this." You straddled him, kissing his neck and wanting to give him more.

His bare skin against yours, warm. Your own skin, flushed with desire.

He licked the trail of blood away and you noticed his veins weren't that visible grey. Weird considering he was technically feeding.

"Your skin looks normal even though there's still blood in your mouth."

"Maybe because I can't stop thinking about you. About how much I would hate living without you."

"Is that why you can't kill me?"

He shrugged, and that simple action he made it look so attractive. The way he looked back at you, it was too much to bear sometimes. "I don't know. When I'm with you, I don't feel like a vampire. I feel normal...as human as I'll ever feel again. Ironic considering I bite you for pleasure."

"You can do whatever you want to me. I feel spoiled every time you so much as glance at me. Your love, it overwhelms me sometimes. I feel like I just got lucky."

"Lucky to meet a vampire?" He rolled his eyes and pouted.

"No, a rich vampire." You said sarcastically and buried your face into his neck.

"Rich, handsome, strong, what else?" He asked.

"You're funny. You know how to make me laugh and I love your laugh...you're incredibly charming and I don't think you realize that...mmm...and no matter how bad you try to be, I know you have a big heart. Sometimes I forget you're vampire. You know that right?"

"No I didn't know, but that makes me very happy." He kissed your forehead.

"You'll have to live without me some-"

His lips met yours quickly. The taste of blood wasn't there anymore.

"Let's not talk about it okay? Not right now." He pleaded.

You stroked his hair and nodded.

Something about this dress brought you back to that night when he undressed you slowly and held you close, kissing your skin gently.

"Would you like to try on another dress?"

"Yeah." You said wanting to get out of that dress as soon as possible. It wasn't even the same color but the cut in the back was similar enough.

"You said navy right? Well this one is navy, the neckline is outlined by this white and red stripe. One of a kind."

"It looks amazing." Your eyes lit up at the sight.

It fit perfectly.

It was very sophisticated yet sexy.

You and Jungkook would look stunning together. The best looking couple of the night.

"What do you think?"

"I'll take it. How much is it?"

"Seven hundred. A pair of shoes from our current collection is included."

"Great. Can I see them now?"

"Yes. Right this way."

She led you to a room filled with shoes neatly lined up on shelves. It didn't take long for you to decide on some matching navy heels.

Jewelry, that way always hard but you picked out matching bracelets. They could double as friendship bracelets. Silver in all its glory. He said he liked gold but he must have so much already.

You had earrings at home and all that was left was your nails.

The salon was empty, thankfully and you did what Jungkook suggested.

All the works; a massage, a facial, nails, and a pedi, even a wax because you felt too lazy to shave.

It was dark out by the time you were all done. You felt like a new person. The dance was a few days away but you wished it was that night. You wanted to have fun already.

"Kookie, you're here. I thought I wasn't going to see you until tomorrow. Look what I bought for us." You hurried over to the table, bursting with excitement just picturing your wrists next to each other, showing off the bracelets.

He surprised you with dinner. You saw the bags of food on the table yet he hadn't moved.

His head was in his arms.

"Kook, what's wrong?" You put the bags down.

He took a book out from under his arms and threw it on the floor.

It was Jin's diary.

"What did you read?" You reached for his hand but he stood up and stepped away.

"Everything. The things you did! The things he did to you! How stupid are you to not see how he abused you?"

"Jungkook-"

"You begged for his bite. You feed him until you couldn't move anymore. That's not love Y/N that's abuse."

"You don't know what you're talking about." Your heart raced and your breathing quickened.

"It's all there Y/N. He didn't love you. He loved that you were human. Vulnerable and weak, easy to prey on."

"He loves me. I know he does. You can't convince me otherwise. You don't know him anymore. You're just trying to find something to be mad at him for."

"You love that he's a vampire don't you?"

"So what if I do. That's none of your business. I don't owe you an explanation. You'll never understand what I have with Jin."

"I understand perfectly....and it disgusts me......" he said harshly, not batting an eye as the tears rolled down your cheek.

You looked away because seeing him look at you like that broke your heart into a million pieces. The things he must think about you now.

He succeeded in making you feel ashamed.

Ashamed of loving someone like Jin.

"Some friend you are Kook. No wonder no one else cared when you ran away."

"Jin especially, right? When he kills me and you. I'm sure he's the one who won't feel a thing. He said so himself right. He'd feel nothing if you disappeared."

Jungkook's words were the icing on cake.

How could he be so right but so wrong at he same time?

It hurt knowing how much he hated you know.

You threw the card at him and hurried off towards Jin's room. It was a few minutes before you heard the front door close but whatever.

If he wanted to hate you then you would hate him back.

Hate him for hurting you like this. For proving that your friendship wasn't as strong as you believed.

Most of all you hated him for existing. For coming into your life.

Ever since he came, you were forced to open your eyes.

Like now, you realized.

This wasn't a coincidence, or something that happened by chance.

It was now clear why Jin left everything here. Why he left his journal.

He knew you two would find it, and he knew Jungkook would read it. That Jungkook would freak.

Jin planned this fight a long time ago.

He wanted you to hate Jungkook just as much as he did.

And it worked.

#jin #jungkook #kookie #jinnie #prince jin #jungkookie #bts fanfics #bts fanfictions #bts fanfiction #bts series #bts vampire au #bts fluff #bts angst

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