#do not look at the shoes I don't know what to do about them >:(
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joemama-2 ¡ 1 day ago
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velvet lies
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pairing: gojo x fem reader synopsis: crippling debt and possible evictions have ruined you. working two jobs with no downtime, and a five-year-old son, you really don't know the meaning of taking a break. after continuous questions about his father, you have decided to finally let your son meet his dad. only thing is, he has no idea said son exists. and to top it off, you have not a single clue about what kinds of things will transpire from this sudden revelation. tags/warnings: 18+ MDNI, smut, fluff, romance, alcohol, classism, mom! reader, lying, abuse, MAJOR angst, slow burn, exes to lovers, cheating, scandals, drugs, drama, family drama wc: 5155 a/n: hi everyone! i'm so excited for this piece of work as I have a lot of exciting ideas planned in store! this will probably have slow updates, so please please please be patient with me. thank you all for reading! i'm aiming for at least 15ish chapters, maybe more or less, depends how much i write in one chapter in the future. next chapter
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“Cash or card?”
“Card.”
The sound of light dinging follows, the transaction completed. “Here you go, Miss. Have a good day.”
“Thank you, you too.” The woman takes the small bag from your outstretched hands, giving one last smile before exiting. The bell at the top of the door rings, signifying her exit. You sigh and look at the clock, one more hour. It’s not that long. But you’ve been here since opening and the shoes you’re wearing are beginning to hurt your feet. Maybe you should’ve broken them in more.
It’s a quaint little cafe. Most of the customers are teenagers, college students, or overworked office workers who need caffeine to get them through the day. Other than that, you have no qualms. Of course, it does get a little annoying having to tell the newer, much younger co-workers that they can’t do this or that. 
A mundane routine of making coffees, packing orders, and ringing them up. Just one more hour. 
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As soon as the clock strikes 5:00, you’re clocking out and saying goodbye. The school is an exact walk of ten minutes, six if you’re fast. Then another ten back to the apartment. And finally, another fifteen to the convenience store. 
Hustle and bustle is all you’ve ever known. Sure, you like it most of the time. But you just wish you could get a break. It’s always go, go, go, but never take a rest and time to yourself for a moment. But when you see that adorable smile plaster on those chubby cheeks you never shy away from pinching, it’s all worth it. “Mama!” 
“Baby!” you crouch down and open your arms. The young boy wastes no time in throwing his body into yours, face nuzzled into your chest and arms around your neck. “How was school? Fun?” you ask, hand rubbing his back up and down.
He nods. “Mhm! Mr. Ito says I got the most gold stars out of everyone in class.” 
Your smile grows wistful, aweing. “Wow, such a good boy, aren’t you?”
You carry Koji into your arms, starting the walk back to your very humble apartment. He chatters innocently the entire trek, with you occasionally adding on or asking questions. His soft white hair pokes at your cheek, to which you straighten down with one free hand. It’s days like these where you wish you could just lounge at home with him, basking in his sweet innocence. But while most people are ending for the day, you’re barely starting your second half.
You feel the self-deprecating thoughts fill your mind like a virus while stationed near the light, waiting for the pedestal symbol to indicate. Your grip tightens around your son slightly, as if anchoring yourself to reality and reminding yourself you’re doing it all for him, and to keep going for him. 
It’s hard, yes. But so is parenting. 
The symbol comes on and you walk, seeing the building of your complex in the distance. Forcing any lingering negativity away, you clear your throat. “So, what did you learn today, baby?”
Koji looks up at you. “We learned how to add! I helped Mina.”
“That’s very nice of you.”
He giggles bashfully, leaning into the kiss you place on his cheek. Eyebrows raising as a sudden memory hits him. “Oh! And Mr. Ito said Dad Appreciation Day is next month. There’s gonna be food and music.”
Your smile wavers, footsteps momentarily pausing before continuing. “Oh, really?” you ask, inhaling a wavy breath of air. “That sounds like fun.”
“Mhm.” Koji nods, then tilts his head curiously at you. “But everyone is bringing their daddies. I wanna bring Papa too.” 
And you really try not to make your guilty grimace visible. “I know, sweetie. I know.”
“Can Papa come?” he frowns. 
No, he can’t. But you’re not about to tell your five-year-old that the reason his father can’t make an appearance is because he doesn’t even know he has a son. It’s been a difficult conversation for you. You’re not sure when or how to have these sorts of hard ones with children. So you’ve been dancing around the subject. Saying his dad is away on vacation, or fighting intergalactic dragons, or some other excuse you’ve been forced to use. He believes you, most of the time. But that doesn’t stop his curiosity and growing impatience. 
The last thing you want him to think is that he has no father in the first place.
He does. You’ve shown him pictures and videos occasionally. Of, and of course, he’s an exact carbon copy of the man. From his bright blue eyes, albino hair, and all the way down to his stubborn personality. You were a little annoyed when your only child took quite literally everything from his father, only leaving him with a couple of things from you–your nose and helpful nature. 
“We’ll see. Papa is busy, remember?” you gently reply, walking through the parking lot of your complex to the lobby.
Koji’s frown deepens and so do the metaphorical scars on your heart. “But Papa’s always busy! I wanna see Papa.”
“I know you do, baby. You will soon, okay?”
“Do you promise?”
You hesitate but eventually nod with a forced smile. “Mama promises.”
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After leaving Koji with the babysitter, you give him a quick kiss and recite the list with the babysitter before rushing off to your second job. A convenience store. 
Not the most savory place, mainly because you get all sorts of crazy and odd customers, but also because you are close. You hate closing. But you need the second disposable income and this is the only place that fits with your schedule. It’s also a little more leaned back than the cafe, when there are no customers, you spend your time browsing the web for jobs.
You’ve probably sent in over 500 applications over the years, with not even half of those places reaching out. Even then, you’re not guaranteed a job. The job market is horrible nowadays and you’re living through it.
Whatever, you think to yourself as you clock in. One day at a time.
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It’s around eleven at night when you're slugging back into your apartment, lights dim, and silence enveloping the place. “Thank you, Sana.” You mutter, exhausted but still sparing the 20-year-old a smile. You hand her a small envelope. “For today and last Saturday. How was he?”
Sana thanks you kindly and grabs her stuff. “All good, no tantrums today.”
“That’s good.” you walk into the kitchen, grabbing some food you’ve meal prepped. “Get home safe, okay?”
“Thank you, Y/N. Sleep well.”
When she leaves, you give yourself a moment to slump over the kitchen island, sighing in both relief and lingering tiredness. The silence feels nice, like an old and familiar friend welcoming you and praising you after yet another day of the same routine. You’ve always loved routines, but you can’t help but crave at least some sort of spontaneity. Putting the tupperware of chicken and rice into the microwave for a minute, its light humming makes you zone out. The conversation from before with your son ringing in your mind like a very annoying bell.
Soon, images of his son, your ex, flood your mind. An old fluttery sensation residing in the pit of your stomach, your body suddenly feeling all too warm for your liking. Your fists clench to stop their light trembling, shaking your head free of him. 
Not now.
You stop the microwave at one second, before it makes that obnoxious beeping and wakes your son. There are two chairs at the small dining table, you sit at one of them and eat your now warm meal. You’ve started meal prepping after one too many missed meals and a few incidents where that light-headedness and blurred vision caused you to faint. Luckily, you were alone when that happened. Unluckily, you were alone when that happened. Nursing a few bruises to your forehead after making contact was not a fun time. 
You take time to eat, in no particular rush. Although you know you should be getting ready for bed soon for another early day tomorrow, your body doesn’t move. Either consciously or subconsciously. The end of the day is when you find yourself attempting to unwind and detach from the day’s events. But, the stress of unpaid bills, debts, and worry for the future always find time to crawl back.
It’s exhausting, extremely so. Sure, you’re an adult and this is normal. But don’t you deserve at least a little bit of time when you don’t have to worry about anything? It feels like every waking second your mind is working overtime, your body in a constant state of motion. It’s worn you down completely over the years. But you have a son who needs you, so you suppose you shouldn’t be feeling pity for yourself.
This is what parenting is all about, isn’t it?
Making sacrifice after sacrifice for your child. However, when you feel yourself sinking deeper and deeper, slowly losing more of yourself, what if there’s nothing left to sacrifice in the first place? The eviction bill from this morning taunts you as it lays upright in front of you in the middle of the table.
It’s then do you think, no, you do have one thing left. 
Koji.
If Koji’s gone, then you really have nothing left. There’s no reason to live if that happens. And with the path you’re going down, that’s feeling more and more like a dreaded possibility. 
I wanna see Papa.
Koji’s words play repeatedly. For a second, you feel yourself resonating with your son. Only for a second. You reach for your phone and go to Google, typing in a name that still haunts you. You’re barely three letters in before his name appears and you’re clicking.
A smiling image fills your screen along with other general information.
For some unknown reason, your breath hitches. You feel like he’s almost staring at you, smiling at your pathetic predicament. Grip tightening around your phone, swallowing down an unexpecting lump, tears fall from your eyes and onto the phone screen.
Why you’re crying, you don’t know. It could be many things, but you won’t address that right now.
Gojo Satoru.
The father of your child, your ex of 4 years. 
You rarely look him up, almost never. Only in desperate times when you feel yourself drowning and needing some sort of comfort. It’s stupid. You haven’t been together or even seen him in seven years. Not since you ended things with him. Not since you felt his hands roam your skin, whispering sweet words.
He didn’t even protest or question why. Almost like he knew your breakup was inevitable. You’re not sure if that hurts more.
You’re twenty-eight now. But while your life still feels the same from when you met Satoru at the ripe age of seventeen, you’ve reached a plateau. But him? He’s thriving, of course. Making a name for himself, as an heir to one of the biggest conglomerates in Japan, the Gojo Group. 
You’re happy for him. But where is that happiness for yourself?
You feel a little, no, a lot jealous. You always were of Satoru. Being given everything he wants without much thought, never worrying about money, and a stable home life. You’re extremely jealous of that bastard.
But right now, jealousy isn’t in the picture. It’s your son’s father. And if you want to keep your son, give him everything he wants, that starts with one person.
Letting him meet his father. 
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“Honey, do you like your pancakes?” you ask your son who’s currently scarfing down his plate of breakfast. Adorned in an adorable shirt uniform shirt and some little black trousers. He hums back excitedly with a muffled “yes, mama”. With a chuckle, you dry up the rest of the dishes, then your hands. Dropping him off at school is the first thing on your agenda, as per usual. 
The walk to his school is a familiar one, wanting to get your son knowledgeable with the route so when the day comes that he needs to walk him himself, he’d know his way back. You pass by other kids and parents, some children yelling bye as they step onto the school grounds, with others giving their children long-lasting hugs.
You walk until you reach his door, his teacher, Mr. Ito, standing outside and greeting his students as they enter. When he makes eye contact with Koji, he smiles a bit wider. “Good morning, Koji.”
“Good morning!” your son happily replies, waving up at his teacher. With one final hug and kiss shared, he’s running in to already begin talking to his friends. Standing back up, you see Mr. Ito already looking at you. And you especially don’t miss the way his eyes not so subtly rake up and down your figure. You clear your throat. “Good morning.”
He meets your eyes again. “Good morning, Y/N-san. How are you today?”
“Good, and you?” 
“Very good.” 
The way his tone is almost causes you to visibly shiver, brows furrowing slightly in discomfort. One of the things you dislike the most about Koji’s school, his teacher. Although he hasn’t outwardly done or said anything inappropriate, you’re a smart woman. “That’s good. Well…have a nice day.” Doing anything you can to quickly end this dreaded conversation, but still wanting to maintain a level of politeness. 
You’re about to turn on your heel and leave when he calls out. “Ah, Y/N-san?”
Damn it, what now? “Yes?” you turn and look at him.
The distance between you reduces as he steps a little closer. “I have some concerns regarding Koji’s behavior in class. Would you be available to set up a conference anytime this week?”
“Behavior? Has he been misbehaving?” You did not expect that.
“Well, it’s complicated. He has some trouble listening as talks when he shouldn’t. I’d like to nip this in the bud before it grows out of control.” Mr. Ito cooly replies, smile looking more like a hidden smirk. “So, will you be available?”
You hesitate, not really. With your two jobs, you barely have time for yourself, let alone your son’s teacher. But if it’s regarding a behavior problem, then do you have any choice? “I think I’ll be free this Saturday. Weekdays are very hectic for more.”
He nods. “That’s fine, we can grab coffee.” When your head tilts slightly, he adds on with a chuckle. “And discuss Koji over coffee. On me.”
Right, of course. You know what this is, but just think about your son. That’s the priority. “Okay, 8 am at Latte Lounge sound good?”
“Sounds excellent, I’ll see you then. Have a wonderful day.”
With a simple nod back, you turn around and finally leave. Practically feeling the way his eyes shamelessly check out your behind. A frown inevitably grows on your face, why wouldn’t it? As long as this man doesn’t try anything…more, you should be fine. And if he does, 1) you’ll be in public, and 2) you’ll tell him straight up.
Whatever. 
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“Pizza or teriyaki?”
“Pizza!”
“Of course.” you chuckle and put the frozen pizza in your cart, your son clutched onto your right hand after announcing he can walk on his own because he’s a big boy. The grocery store isn’t crowded during this time of day. Rightfully so. It’s 7 pm on a Tuesday, most people already cooking dinner by now. You always grocery shop at this time, your son appreciates it too. There’s been a few times when you both got quickly and very overwhelmed with the bustling nature of the grocery store on a weekend morning. Currently, you’re moving through the snack section now, picking up a few of your and Koji’s favorites. 
“Mama, can I pick a cereal?” Koji asks and points to the cereal aisle next over. When you nod, he happily runs off. You still however make sure to look over at him frequently when picking up and putting down a few snacks. 
You reach up to grab a pack of Hello Panda, the pink and chocolate ones, before a hand beats you to it. “Oh, I’m sorry.” As soon as you look over, you and the stranger meet eyes. 
Immediately, there’s a silence that falls over you two. Eyes each blown wide in shock. 
Oh, you’ve got to be shitting me.
Just your luck. As soon as the stranger speaks, a strange nostalgia fills you. “Y-Y/N?”
It almost sounds weird coming from his lips. Your friend–well, ex?--friend gets out. He still looks the same, just more…manly. 
“...Suguru, I–I’m… surprised to see you.” you awkwardly laugh. Reunions were never easy.
“Oh my god,” Suguru breaths out, shaking his head with a faint smile. “Well, shit. I mean, how are you? You..you look good.” His eyes move down your figure in an appreciative way.
“Thank you, I’m good. How are you? Your hair is longer.” you motion to his sea of black, healthy locks. “ ‘M a little jealous.”
He laughs with you, the sound reminding you of old times. “Yeah, been working on it. And I’m good.”
Another pause is permitted, as if you two aren’t very sure what to say to one another. Well, in all honesty, it has been seven years. “Well,” he clears his throat and puts his hands in his pockets. “What are you up to?”
“Oh, you know,” you glance down at your cart. “Just some shopping.”
He also looks down, head tilting slightly. “Ah, right.” With a nod, he juts his head toward the direction of the kid’s toothpaste. “Just for one?” He laughs, joking of course. 
You mentally curse yourself, putting a pack of cookies on top of the toothpaste to hide its already revealed existence. “Uh, ye—”
“Mama! I want this one!” Koji runs up to you, showcasing his desired cereal.
Well…..shit. 
As if things weren’t already complicated.
With Suguru’s eyes even wider than when they were staring at you, his mouth is practically on the floor when the young boy looks at him. His sharp eyes dart across his features and…..
“I-is this—”
“Koji.” you cut him off, gulping and shifting the child closer to your leg. “My son.”
Suguru spends another good minute staring at the boy, who innocently stares back. When his eyes slowly move from the blue ones to yours, there are a million and more questions swirling in his brain. He’s not even sure which one to ask first. But he goes with the obvious. “...Is….is he…..”
You nod uncomfortably. 
He lets out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding, hand running through his hair. “Holy shit, I mean….holy heck.”
Your lips purse, putting Koji’s cereal in your cart before picking him up in your arms. “Koji, this is Suguru. Say hi.”
“Hi.” Koji childishly smiles at the older man. “Are you Mama’s friend?”
Suguru spares you a glance. “Uhm…yeah. Yeah, kid, I am. Nice to meet you.” He then shifts weirdly, not sure if he should shake the boy’s hand, which seems too formal. He decides to gently ruffle his hair. “So…how old is he?” The question is directed towards you, but Koji answers. “I’m five!” He holds up five small fingers. 
“Five?” Suguru’s brows furrow at you. It’s surprising how quickly you recognize that scolding look of his. “Have you—”
“No.” you once again cut him off, shifting Koji to your hip. “I haven’t.”
“Why?”
That’s a good question. One you know the answer to…slightly. But with Koji looking between you two curiously, you can’t exactly say why. At least not here. “I….I just…haven’t.”
Silence. 
You can feel Suguru regarding you with many emotions, but the main one is confusion. He bites his lip as he thinks over how to react properly to this situation. From the looks of it, Koji is just as clueless as him, maybe even more. “Jesus Christ, I don’t even know what to say right now.” Heavily sighing, he looks back at Koji, then you, then Koji, then finally you. “You’re going to…right? I mean, he deserves to know, Y/N. You’ve just–I mean, come on.”
There’s not much of a response to that, much to his expectation. You always used to do this when you were guilty. But Suguru has always been the more… empathetic of the two. “Look, I–I know you’re probably going through your own things, but…”
You look at him again, remorseful. His lips purse and with a heavy sigh, he takes a card out from his pocket and hands it to you. “Here’s my business card, it has my number. We lost your old one, so.”
Your hand reaches out to take it, examining the words, Rising Futures Foundation. "Building futures, one child at a time.” You meet his eyes again, forcing words out. “Okay…thanks.” 
“No need,” he waves you off, taking down the two Hello Panda boxes and putting them in your cart. “I’m sorry, I have things to do right now, but please…give me a call, okay?”
With slight hesitation, you nod. He mirrors you before focusing on the child again, a smile forming. “See you, buddy.” Suguru pats his shoulder lightly before walking away and away from your vision.
Your mind is being overrun, body feeling stiff and stuck, unsure of how to process what the fuck just happened. No doubt he’s about to tell his best friend. Then said best friend will find you and Koji. Then maybe he’ll try taking you to court for hiding his son for five years. You’ll obviously lose because you have no lawyer and Satoru has the best. Your son, your one and only, your sole happiness will be taken away from you and you’ll be left alone to rot in angui–
“Mama?” Koji’s small hand is put to your cheek, stirring you from your mild comatose state. “Are you okay? You have tears in your eyes.”
“What?” Raising your hand to your eye and sure enough, you are letting loose some tears. “No, no, Mama’s okay. I’m not crying, just…just tired.”
But with growing age, so is his perception. “Are you sure? Did your friend make you cry? I don’t like him then.”
Oh, how sweet. You smile, head tilting. “No, baby. Don’t say that, okay? Mama’s fine. I promise. See? I’m smiling. Wanna smile with me?”
Like clockwork, he follows your emotions and smiles, giggling. “Yeah, I wanna smile with you. I like smiling with you, Mama.”
“And I like it when you smile with me too.”
Maybe, this isn’t too bad. You were just thinking that you want Koji to finally meet his dad. So, this is good. This ensures a meeting. But, it also ensures a deep-rooted, most likely bad confrontation that will take place between you two. Why wouldn’t it? At least you’ll be able to prepare yourself now, mentally. 
You can imagine the harsh words he might say. The raised voices and brutal questions about how you can do this to him and so on. In hindsight, you deserve it. What kind of woman does do this to a man? Children are supposed to be bundles of joy, not hidden secrets. Of course, there’s the lingering worries of what legal action Satoru, or his family, might try to take.
That would quite literally fuck you over so hard.
But…maybe Satoru will go easy on you because of your past. You really don’t know. This situation is messy as fuck and it’s mostly—a lot—because of you. You have no one to blame but yourself. Hopefully, he’ll take pity on you, even though you hate when others pity you. It’s different when it comes to him, the father of your son. It always has been and it probably always will be. 
Honestly, you’re a little relieved that you ran into the best friend of the man than the man himself. Now that would’ve been bad. 
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The sounds of skin against skin fill the room, mixed with heavy grunts and airy moans. The headboard repeatedly hitting the wall plays like a drum, the lights dim and the view of the dark city landscape is exposed. Satoru’s gripping the woman’s hips, leaving crescent-shaped indents in her fair skin. Her constant mewls sound heavenly in his ears. “God, you feel so….good…”
“S-satoru!” 
“Yeah, say my name. Just like that, baby.”
He presses a firm hand down on the small of her back to keep her arch in place, feeling his release invade her warm walls, filling her with a lovely warmth. She clenches around him, moaning out once more as she finishes with him.
He collapses against her back, his heavy breaths tingling her ear. “Baby, that was…so good…” she croaks out. 
Satoru’s mind is fuzzy, vision blurring slightly. He hums in response and leans back up to pull out, discarding the heavy condom with his load into the trashcan beside the bed. “Stay.” With a small pat to her hip, he’s forcing his limbs out of bed and to the connecting bathroom to grab a warm rag. Aftercare. Although most of the time, he really can’t be bothered to do something like this. Cleaning her up feels like a chore sometimes,  but the last time he voiced that opinion, it led to a huge argument between the two. 
In just a few minutes, they’re both cleaned and changed. Wearing his sweats low on his hips while she indulges in just one of his oversized shirts. Another small pet peeve he has. And another thing he must keep his mouth shut about. “What time do you have to go into the office tomorrow?” Himari asks, snuggled up against his chest, dainty fingers tracing circles along the firm muscles. 
“Same time as always,” he sighs, grabbing the TV remote and putting a random show on. “You know that.”
“I know, but…can’t you just call off tomorrow? Please? I wanna spend the day with you.”
When he looks back down at her, she’s frowning. A small tug is pulled at his heart and before he knows it, he’s pulling her closer and placing a gentle kiss to her hair. “Can’t, baby. Maybe this weekend?”
Satoru can feel her ready to protest again, but the sound of the front door downstairs being opened and closed interrupts the moment. Followed by the familiar voice of his friend. “Satoru! You here?”
Satoru���s brows furrow slightly. A small grunt falls from his lips as he maneuvers Himari off his chest, standing up and walking out. He looks down the staircase and sees Suguru staring up at him. “What do you want? I’m sorta busy.” Himari comes out and hugs his waist, proof of his so-called “busyness”. 
Suguru holds back an eye roll when the woman gives him a look, focusing on his best friend. “Need to talk to you. Privately.” 
“For what?”
“It’s important.”
“So just say it now.”
“Damn it, Satoru. Just come down and kick your friend out.”
“Girlfriend.” Himari corrects with a scowl.
“Yeah, sure.” Suguru waves her off and motions for Satoru to come down as he walks into the man’s kitchen.
Sighing with his eyes closed, he turns to Himari. “Sorry, babe. My driver’ll give you a ride back.”
Once again, she frowns. “But I—”
“Please.” 
His bottom lip pokes out in a small, but convincing pout. “I’ll see you later, mkay?” Satoru reaches his thumb out and brushes it along her cheekbone, which he knows she’s weak for. Confliction and hesitation dance in her eyes but she concedes. Gathering her purse and shows, she gives Satoru a dramatic kiss on the lips before leaving. 
“Finally,” Suguru huffs from the kitchen, swirling a glass of whiskey. “I thought you guys broke up.”
“It was a break.” Satoru grumbles, walking over to stand across from his friend, snatching the glass out his hand and sipping. “Anyway, what’s so important you come unannounced for and demand my sweet company to leave?”
“That woman is not sweet.” 
Satoru smiles and shrugs, “She tastes it.” 
A groan is heard from Suguru, eyes rolling before he shakes his head. “Look, you should sit down.”
“That good, huh?” he plops down in the nearby chair and leans back, arm resting against the back of it. He nods. “Alright, shoot, baby.”
Suguru takes in a deep breath and steels himself for the more than likely hard conversation. A part of him feels like he’s intruding, like it’s not his place to reveal such a thing to him. But at the end of the day, it’s his best friend. And you, well…he’s not exactly sure if you’re still friends or not. “What I tell you might sound crazy, but I need you to promise you’ll stay calm until I’m done speaking, got it?”
Satoru’s brows raise in mild astonishment, seeing Suguru get all serious like this is quite amusing. “Okay, I promise.” He shrugs again. “Can’t be that bad, right? No one’s hurt.”
Not yet, Suguru says to himself. He claps his hands together, mulling over how exactly to break the news. “So, I came across an old friend today.”
“Oh yeah? She cute?” Satoru swirls the alcohol in his glass.
Suguru holds back another eye roll. “Yeah, she is.”
“Nice, man.” the white-haired man chuckles, head tilting. “So what, did she make a move on you or something? Now that’s crazy.”
“I’ll have you know, I’m actually quite favorable amongst women.”
“Are you now?”
“Listen, you ass. No talking, just listening.” When he doesn’t get a response back, he takes it as a sign to continue. “Anyway, I saw an old friend. And…she had a kid with her.” Satoru nods slowly, already getting lost on his this information is even remotely crazy, or relevant to him. But he stays shut, deciding not to face another one of Suguru’s mini-lectures. One more deep breath is let out from Suguru and he gets to the point. “It was Y/N, she has a kid.”
A small beat of silence follows as Suguru gauges his best friend’s reaction. He doesn’t look like he’s flipping out, but he doesn’t show much emotion either. Confusing Suguru, he waits for the inevitable lash out. “Who?” Satoru ends up asks.
His best friend knits his brows, trying to see if the other man is serious or not. When his expression doesn’t change, he replies. “Y/N…” he speaks slowly. “...your ex?”
Still, no emotion. But his grip on the glass does tighten.  “And she has a kid.” Suguru reiterates, almost in nervousness now. 
“Satoru….the kid looks exactly like you.”
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a/n: thank you guys for reading!!! Sorry if this chapter was a little short, i’ll try to make the next ones a little more longer. But writing super huge chapters isn’t my forte. Anyway, stay tuned for chapter 2 :)
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hyperpotamianarch ¡ 18 hours ago
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I chose other, because my father's family is French - which I would like to elaborate on a little.
My paternal grandmother was born and raised in Strasbourg, on the border of Germany. It's in the region of Alsace, which throughout history switched hands between France and Germany multiple times. My Grandmother speaks a little German and Alsatian as well as French and Hebrew, though her mother is more fluent in German than her. I never got to meet her father. My great grandparents only married after the Holocaust, and I only know about them that my great grandfather's family escaped by moving around rural Alsace. They had to hide being Jewish.
My paternal grandfather's family is another story. My father is fifth generation Parisian - his father, grandfather and great-grandfather were all born in Paris. My grandfather's great grandfather was probably born in another town in Alsace - Colmar. I make this assumption based on the fact my great grandfather's great grandfather served as a rabbi in this town and was actually the chief rabbi of the Consistoire of Alsace - which is a detail that could doxx me if it wasn't so long ago that he has myriads of descendants and nobody would actually bother looking up the chief rabbi of the Consistoire of Alsace. If for some reason you do have a list of the rabbis there available I'm more likely to want to talk to you than worry that you'll doxx me.
My grandfather's parents also only married after the war. My great-grandfather served in the French army at the Maginot line, and we all know how that ended. He was in a German PoW camp for the duration of the war - specifically one for the Jewish soldiers. They worked in a shoe factory there, I believe? Under inhumane condition, until my great-grandfather and the guy running the factory collected a bunch of bed bugs and threatened to unleash them on the Nazi overseer. That got them slightly better conditions.
My great-grandmother's family was particularly targeted by the Nazis, because my great-great-grandfather has managed to antagonize a member of the Nazi party once. Luckily, through a friendly tip from a phone operator he caught wind of it in time and fled to Switzerland.
My maternal side of the family comes from various Eastern-European countries, each great grandparent from a slightly different background. The only direct Holocaust survivor was my grandmother's father, who came from Hungary. He has a long story that includes serving in the Hungarian army and somehow surviving the death marches even though he had trouble walking, I don't really remember all the details.
Each of my three other great-grandparents fled Europe in time in their own different way. My Polish great-grandmother (married to the Hungarian Holocaust survivor, both passed away by now) barely managed to flee on the last ship before the invasion. My maternal grandfather's parents are both technically Belarusian, but they only met in Israel. My great-grandfather was a Chabad Chosid (before they became what they are now) who was also active in Zionist circles in the USSR and managed eventually to get a certificate and make an Aliyah. In Israel he chose to study in a Litvak/Musar Yeshivah, which if you know anything about the history of Chassidut is an interesting choice. I think he met my great-grandmother through the Yeshivah (no, she wasn't a student, it was an Orthodox Yeshivah. No, I don't really know the details). She has fled by fabricating marriage to a guy and went to live with relatives who already were here.
On that side, many of their relatives were killed in the Holocaust.
Either way, I'm mostly of Alsatian Jewish descent, and we have some different minhagim! As a general rule we are considered Yekkes, meaning German Jews, and our practices are similar. There are a couple of traditional foods that I don't actually like, and a lot of tunes that I do - we have a different tune for Shir HaMa'alot for every holiday and special Shabbats, and that's really fun! We also have a very particular tune for reading the Haggadah, but... Well... Yekke music tends to have a very distinct sound to it, and my mother's family tends to dislike it. For me it's nostalgic, for them it gets on their nerves.
I know I didn't gave to do that, but I sometimes feel like my particular type of Ashkenazi Jews us too rare. For the most part, Ashkenazim in Israel get to choose between picking Polish traditions or Lithuanian traditions, and that perceived dichotomy tends to erase the finer details. So I wanted to share a little from my particular heritage.
Feel free to specify in the notes! Also sorry I was only able to list these.
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sungbeam ¡ 23 hours ago
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𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐩 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐥
nonidol!yoon jeonghan x gn!reader
2.3k words, fluff, comfort, reader is sick, technically a college au, light swearing, mentions of food, mentions of cold medication, tbh i know i advocate for platonic fics but i am also just a girl. so he does pine a little lol, slice-of-life-ish, barely proofread
a/n: there is like no plot, i just am feeling ooey-gooey about svt rn heh :') been watching so much gose recently and it's healing my soul
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Yoon Jeonghan was many things, but oblivious was not one of them. “Oh my god, you're sick,” were his first words to you when you opened your apartment door. His voice was droning, perfectly unimpressed, but it masked the concern attempting to skirt its way to the surface. 
“It's not that” —your sorry attempt at denial crumbled like a house of cards as you turned away to cough into your elbow. The taste of metal lingered in the back of your throat and you winced, reaching into your bag to grab your water bottle. After swallowing down a generous helping, you said to him without looking him in the eye, “I'm fine.”
Jeonghan blinked. “That's really cute,” he replied with a thin smile. “Back inside.”
“But Jeonghan—”
“No.” He grabbed you firmly by your shoulders and steered you back into your apartment, his body waddling in behind you because of your balking in the doorway. He kicked the front door shut, shucking his shoes off with uncanny accuracy into an empty space on the shoe rack. “Shoes off, Yn-ah. Don't start an argument you won't win.”
You grumbled under your breath, but did as you were told. All the while, Jeonghan smoothed a hand over his jaw, performing mental gymnastics. How did you get sick? How much time did he have before he needed to get to campus? Could he reasonably make you soup before he needed to leave for his exam?
The first question was easy to answer. He internally smacked himself—last night: your runny nose, the vitamin C powder you added to your water, your shivers on the walk home from the library. Oh, fuck. He should have driven. Why did he make you both walk in that cold?
Guilt coursed through him as he directed you back into your bedroom. 
It was a quarter to 8, meaning he didn't have time to make you ramen and make it to his exam before the doors closed. 
“I have so much shit to do today” —another horrid cough rattled through you, and Jeonghan frowned to himself as he snatched the extra blanket out of your closet— “I can't… Hannie, there's so much I need to—”
“I know, Yn-ah,” he said softly, eyes sad and tender as he bundled you up in three layers until you were likely unable to unwrap yourself. He perched by your side, his palm grazing over your forehead to take your temperature. Hot. Not good. “But if you don't take care of yourself now, it'll only get worse.”
He glanced at his phone. Five to 8—he still had fifteen minutes. It was a blessing that you lived closer to campus than he did. 
“I hate when you're right,” you muttered. The lower half of your face was tucked beneath the edges of your blankets, so all he saw were your tired, glaring eyes. 
He smirked to himself, a fuzziness warming his chest. So petulant. “You always do,” he mused. “What did you have to do today? I'll try and help out as best I can.”
Your glare softened at the corners and your eyes flitted away from him. “It's okay. I'll deal with it all when I wake up. I—wait.” Your eyes shot wide open. “You have that exam today! You have to leave—what time is it?”
“Yah, I'll make it,” he laughed. “Worry about yourself.”
“You literally said last night that you were worried about failing—”
“And now I'm worried about you,” he countered. Satisfaction brought an impish twinkle to his eyes as you scowled at him again. “But fine, I'll leave if you insist.”
He rose from the edge of the bed, picking his backpack up to sling over his shoulder. 
“Thank you.”
With his back toward you, he could allow himself to grin. “What was that?” he called back innocently. 
“Don't fail.”
He huffed out another laugh as he reached the threshold of your bedroom doorway. Jeonghan wondered briefly if he should coax that thank you out of your mouth again, but he really did need to leave. It was awful. Everything in him was ready to throw away this exam to stay here with you. “Go to sleep, honey. I'll see you when you wake up.”
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Three hours later, Jeonghan shouldered his way into your apartment, his backpack on his shoulders, his mind far away from that disgusting exam he finished, and his hands occupied with a grocery bag of items he picked up on his way here. When he left earlier, he had swiped your keys on the way out so he could let himself back in without waking you up. He dumped those very keys onto the table by the door, the gazillion key chains attached to the one carabiner clattering inelegantly loud. 
He glanced over at your closed door, hoping he didn't just wake you up. 
With a little less noise, he abandoned his backpack by the couch and made his way over to the kitchen. While he had made it in time to his exam, it had taken more willpower to center his attention on the exam itself rather than letting his mind wander to all the things he wanted to do after he was done. The to-do list spanned about five items: buy cold medicine and orange juice, decide on what food to make you, buy the ingredients for that food, persuade your TA to let him pick up your graded essay (that one, he saw on a sticky note by your desk), and come back to take care of you. 
(If the TA grading his exam took note of the small list he'd jotted down in the top corner of page five, no they didn't.)
There had been several ideas of what he could make you once he was free. He had stared at the row of vegetables in the produce department for a good ten minutes before he decided on something less usual. He could make instant ramen, but that didn't seem like the healthiest option for him to feed you. There was also seaweed soup—did he have the time to go to another store to find what he needed? No. 
His next great idea was something simple, but delicious: chicken noodle soup. 
Jeonghan rummaged around your cabinets, locating the things he needed—cutting board, knife—he opened a door and sighed to himself. So you did have pasta already. Great. 
He examined the box of dried elbow macaroni and compared it to the bowtie pasta he'd picked out. “Mine’s better,” he muttered, shelving your macaroni and bumping the cabinet closed. 
In the largest pot he could find, he brewed up a hearty chicken soup, using the bones from the rotisserie chicken he bought to add more richness to the broth's flavoring. Every carrot, onion, and celery stalk he sliced, and every piece of chicken he shredded, was done deftly and with great care. This was for you, after all, and if this soup could help you get better, then he would make it the best damn thing you'd ever tasted. 
There were plenty of things Jeonghan didn't want to do or weaseled his way out of, but he could be running on one hour of sleep, and he would still haul his ass up to make kimchi from scratch if you asked him to. 
He was stationed behind the stove, tasting the soup for adjustments, when he heard your bedroom door open. 
Jeonghan peered over his shoulder and smiled at the bundle of blankets waddling your way out into the main room, your hair sticking up in odd places, and your eyes still at half mast. “Good morning, sleepy head. How're you feeling?”
“Meh,” you said hoarsely, clearing your throat. You squinted at the sunlight streaming in through the open curtains. “What're you making? It smells nice.”
“Hm? Oh, I made you some soup. Go take the medicine on the counter and sit down; I'll bring you a bowl.”
As he reached over to grab another pinch of salt, he heard you tearing open the box of cold medicine behind him. 
A moment passed by of quiet, but his heart leapt straight into his throat as he felt a soft weight rest against his back. “Thank you, Hannie,” you murmured, forehead pressed between his shoulders. 
There were about a dozen things running through his mind at the moment—things he could say, things he could do. He was an ounce of willpower away from melting on the spot, but the heat rising from the soup pot kept him upright. “Aish… thank me by getting better, okay?”
You hummed in acknowledgment and lifted yourself off his back. When you hobbled away to sit down at the table, Jeonghan couldn't brush away the feeling that the spot your head had rested was now cold. 
“How was the” —cough— “the exam?” 
Jeonghan glanced over at you as he carefully ladled soup into two bowls. He hummed, “Could've been better, but can't really do anything about it now.”
“I'm sure you did good,” you replied, holding out your hands like a kid waiting for their turn to get candy from a jar as Jeonghan made his way over to you with the soup. “You always say you did bad when you actually scored in the top ten percent.”
“Careful, honey, it's hot.” Jeonghan continued to hold the bowl even as you cupped it in your hands, until it safely reached the table. Only then did he seat himself down adjacent to you. “Yeah, well, you always said I should be more humble,” he joked.
You picked up your spoon and gestured at him with it. “Humility and lying are different things,” you said pointedly. “Anyways, thank you. This looks really yummy.”
“I don't lie,” he drawled with a twinkle in his eye. He leaned his cheek against his fist and watched as you took a spoonful and gently blew on the hot liquid. The delight that lit up your face was enough to make him happy for a century. He inclined his chin. “Good?”
“Very good. Sometimes I forget that you're good at cooking, too.”
“Not like Mingyu though,” he chuckled and brought a spoonful up to his lips. 
You shot him a look. “You don't always have to compare yourself, Hannie-ah. I'm not talking about Mingyu right now.”
Maybe I just want to make sure, he thought, then brushed it under that large, metaphorical rug in his mind. Jeonghan gave a half-hearted shrug. 
Your mouth flattened into a displeased line. His grin widened. 
When the both of you finished as many helpings as you had the appetite for, Jeonghan graciously offered to wash the dishes. He practically anchored you to the couch by wrapping you in yet another blanket—it was a double-edged sword; you were quite cute like that and he had half the mind to ditch the dishes. Once done with his task, he plucked out a dose of cold medication to take for himself, as well. 
You eyed him from the couch as he swallowed the pills with a glass of orange juice. “Did I get you sick already?” you asked, your voice having become more nasally from your stuffy nose. 
“Not yet,” he said, “it's just preventative measures since I'm gonna be hanging around you.”
“You're not leaving?” 
Your words were one thing, but the way you peered over the back of the couch at him and the upward intonation in your voice told him something else. He smiled to himself as he walked over to the couch with his juice. “No, I was going to help you finish your work for the day, but if you want me to leave, I—”
“Only if you're not afraid of getting sick,” you said quickly. 
He sighed with an air of melodrama. “I suppose I can stay after all.” He brought out his laptop and the essay he finagled from your TA, vaguely mentioning something about his careful white lies in order to accomplish his mission. It was truly something only Jeonghan could pull off and get away with. 
The first item on your to-do list was to send out a couple emails. 
Jeonghan felt the weight of your head fall onto his shoulder, and he glanced down at you in amusement. “You're not falling asleep on me, are you?” he teased, his fingers paused from the email he was typing out while you dictated the wording. 
You shifted your head. “No, I'm still awake. Do you think this sounds too bubbly?”
“It’s not too bubbly,” he said, cocking his head to the side. “But the thing is you're not this agreeable in real life—aish! Haha, hey! Don't hit me!”
He could imagine your cute, little scowl. “I am incredibly agreeable.”
“Yes, yes.” Jeonghan lightly pat your head. “You're very lovely, Yn-ah.”
You chose to ignore the impish tone in his voice. It was what he wanted you to do anyway—believe that he thought you were lovely.  
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It was difficult to parse out how much time passed, but at some point, the TV was turned on to a random channel playing some 90s sitcom, and his laptop was ditched on the coffee table. Jeonghan's legs ended up sprawled across the length of the couch while your layers of blankets covered both of you. Your head rested comfortably on his chest as he continued to watch TV in silent contentment.
Jeonghan was a lot of things, but he certainly wasn't oblivious to the fact that you took the wrong cold medicine. The box he bought had both daytime and nighttime meds, the latter of which contained melatonin to aid with uninterrupted sleep. He didn't say anything earlier when he realized, but it wasn't like he could say anything now. 
He glanced down at your face, his hand cupping the back of your head with too much tenderness for friendship. You were asleep; there was nothing he could do, no jokes to make or fun to poke. 
Him, his thoughts, and you. 
But this was fine. He was happy and warm like the perfect bowl of soup filling an empty stomach, and he had no intention of leaving until he knew that you were better. As his eyes slowly drooped closed, he sank further into the blankets and your hold, soul nourished.
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a/n: pls remember to reblog + comment if you enjoyed <3
svt m.list
permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @outrologist @rikizm @luumiinaa @lotties-readings @tinkerbell460 @meosjinnn @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @floatingpluto @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @eunseok-s @bless-311 @leaz-kpop-life @fluorescentloves @thesunsfullmoon @haechansbbg @kpopjackie @jundundun @http-gyu @mars101 @moonyswolf @honeyrecommends @synthwxve @thecarnivaloflies @p-d1ddy @thatonedemigodfromseoul @foivetimesthecharm
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mewkwota ¡ 20 hours ago
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So I was just supposed to find out myself that Volnutt had a (scrapped) casual outfit, so sure, of course I'm gonna try to draw it.
That way he has something more fashionable to wear out of battle.
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tinylilacbun ¡ 1 day ago
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I just had a thought for your new series.
Everyone in the obx kinda knows how Luke is but noone says anything. Maybe JJ shows up to babysit and he had a bruise/black eye or cut basically an obvious injury and toddler readers parents recognise what it's from and invite him to spend a few nights in their guest room under the guise of babysitting because they know he won't accept help
Feel free to completely ignore this, I literally just woke up and had the thought so I thought I'd share- :3
-a very shy mutual lol 😅
Omg hi my sweet moot!! Hope you like this :3
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You're sitting on the living room sofa, wriggling your feet as you watch Bluey on the tv while eating your snack, occasionally seeing your parents pass by.
They're getting ready for their date and instead of whining and crying for them to stay you're giddy with excitement and can't wait for JJ finally to arrive.
You gasp when you hear the doorbell ring, jumping off the couch to run towards the front door barely reaching the handle you open it quickly, squealing at the sight of JJ.
JJ chuckles, your adorable face distracting him from the throbbing pain from the lingering bruises and cuts on his face that you luckily haven't noticed yet as you hug his legs.
"Oh, JJ, honey good you're here. We're almost ready to go. She already had dinner but still needs her bath before going to sleep." Your mother tells him as she puts on her coat while your father puts on his shoes.
"No problem, we'll manage this, huh?" He grins down at you.
She turns to face him, her smile fading at the state the teenager is in. Obviously your parents know about his father and the probably bad environment JJ is living in, your mother's heart aching at the sight before him.
JJ has a forming bruise on his cheek and cuts on his eyebrow and his bottom lip, but still smiling down at the little princess that's clinging to his legs. Your parents share a look, already figuring what must have happened.
"Hey, buddy, um we really got a lot on our plate the next few days and wanted to ask if you would maybe sleep here in our guest room for the rest of the week? It would really take some pressure from our shoulders knowing our baby is taken care of." Your father asks him, grabbing the car keys from their designed bowl.
"Uh, yea...sure." He says, not noticing the true intent of the request but agrees nonetheless, he could never say no to spending time with you. "You heard that, cupcake? We're gonna have a sleepover."
"Yay! C'mon Jay! I gots to show you m'new critter family!" You squeak, pulling at his hand to drag him to your room.
As soon as you both disappear from their sight your mother sighs. "I'm worried about him."
Your father nods, grabbing her hand and kissing the back of it. "Me too. But we can't do much since he won't accept it. I'm glad he agreed to stay, tho. Now, come on, let's give him some time to relax here."
You're happily showing him your new calico critter set that you got after your dentist appointment. Introducing each critter to him, you both sitting on the fluffy carpet of your room.
"And dis S'Jay 'cause he reminds me of you!" You smile, handing him the tiny figure, looking up at his face for his reaction you furrow your brows in confusion.
Without thinking you reach up to touch his cheek and JJ winces, gently taking your wrist and pulling it away from his face. "Don't touch it please, um...it-"
"Hurts? You got boo-boos?" You ask curiously and he nods, a small smile on his face at your innocent question.
"Yeah, but it's fine." He says, watching how you rush out of your room.
He gets up from the ground and follows after you, seeing you just as you're about to enter the bathroom and as he's about to enter you rush back out and bump into his legs, JJ grabbing your shoulders to keep you steady with a chuckle. "Careful there. Watcha got there?"
You motion for him to come closer and he leans down, not expecting you to suddenly place a bandaid on his cheek, grabbing another one from the colorful package that you place over the cut on his eyebrow.
JJ's face softens at the action, picking you up when it seems you were done with nursing his wounds. "Thank you..."
You smile at him brightly, leaning closer to press a kiss on each bandaid. "Kisses make me feels better."
His heart almost explodes at your cute gesture, letting you tuck your face in his neck as you wrap your arms around it he could feel a single tear slip down his cheek, grateful for having someone who doesn't question him or tells him that he should get help and do something about his dad.
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Taglist
For everything:
@my-river-lilly @pauntedblacknails @fanfictioniseverything @devilslilbabysblog @buckymydarlingangel @hallecarey1 @daybreakwinter @loveshineslikethesky @wandaslittlewhore @vase-of-lilies @white-wolf1940 @simpingbutch @mischiefsemimanaged @alina02 @teddybearsgrr @doozywoozy @angelbabydoll28 @glxwingrxse @lilymurphy03 @veryvaughnny @lokigirlszendaya @youngstarfishdinosaur @little--baby--bear @minideathgoddess @rach2602 @gh0stgurl @flourishandblotts-inc @lovelyy-moonlight @yoruse
@mythixmagic @iris-xoxo-juhu @mylettterstoyou @sunf1ower16
For JJ:
@chiaraanatra @chimindity @flora-eva
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clemswinecorner ¡ 2 days ago
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Birthday [Harry Lewis/W2S]
Summary: You and Harry have barely been dating when his birthday rolls around.
Wordcount: 2.1k
Warnings: swearing probably, nothing major
Happy Birthday to our favourite!! In honour of his birthday, I wrote this (don't mind this being published when his birthday only has like an hour left)
Main Masterlist
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You and Harry had only been romantically involved with each other for a month or two when his birthday rolled around. You’d sent him a birthday text in the morning, of course, but didn’t see him until later in the day. He spent the morning with the Sidemen recording some golf video, and them and his friends would all meet up at his around 5 p.m. You were kind of nervous when you showed up, because it was your boyfriend’s birthday. Especially because the relationship was still so new, you were a bit nervous about how it would go and what the deal would be. You knew his friends since you’d met through Josh years ago, being Freya’s lifelong best friend. You made your way into the friend group when you moved to London, and had celebrated his birthday with him plenty of times before, but this year was different. It was Josh who opened the door, not Harry, and you greeted him with a smile. 
“Ah, look who’s here!” You give him a quick hug and greet Callum, who was just walking out of his room, with a smile. “I’ll tell him you got here, yeah?” He says, before he walks back to the living room. Harry’s roommates were both aware that you guys are more than friends, though you hadn’t explicitly told them. You’ve just taken off your coat and shoes when Harry walks in. “Oh, hello,” you turn around to him and smile. “Hey birthday boy,” you smile, holding out your hands for a hug, which he accepts. You smell the sweet cologne he usually wears when recording on his hoodie, as he holds you tight. You lean back, still looking at his face with your hands around his neck. “Happy birthday, my love!” You smile, placing a kiss on his lips. You can feel a smile form on his face as he pulls you closer to him. “Thank you, baby. Glad you could make it,” you jokingly roll your eyes. “What, you think I’d miss your birthday? I haven’t in years,” He lets out a nervous chuckle, scratching the back of his head. “Yeah, no, you haven’t. You look really nice, by the way,” he tells you, finally able to check you out. “Thank you. Now, do you want your present now or later?” You ask, and you interrupt him before he’s able to talk. “I know I didn’t have to get you anything, but I wanted to,” He smiles at your kindness, “Okay, thank you. I don’t know, I think a few people want to do it during dinner, but up to you,” You nod and think about it for a second. “I’ll give it later, then,” you say, dropping your tote bag on the floor. He nods, and walks back into the living room, with you following him. You greet everyone enthusiastically, not having seen most of them for a while. 
At around half six, Harry walked up to you, nudging your side. You turn your attention away from Simon, who you were in conversation with. “I’m going to get changed, and then we’re going, yeah?” You nod, excusing yourself as you put down your empty glass. You quickly pack two wrapped presents out of your bag, before you walk into his bedroom. He turns around, his shirt already off. You still weren’t tired of that view, and you shameless looked him up and down. He was already in his black trousers, and it was a shame he had to put on a shirt. “Sorry, could’ve knocked,” You softly say, and he shakes his head, “No it’s fine, was just confused who it was.” He sticks his arms through the sleeves, and god, this shouldn’t be as hot as it is. You sit on his bed, and he looks at you curiously as he buttons his shirt. “Sorry, just admiring my view,” you admit, and you can see a slight blush spreading on his neck and chest. He doesn’t say anything back. , nervously smiling as he focuses on his shirt. “Anyway, I have some presents with me as well,” He looks up again with a smile, taking a seat next to you. You first hand him a flat, squared present, making him look up curiously. “Did you talk to Cal about this?” He asks, glancing over to the record player that was still in its box in the corner of his room. You shrug, not wanting to give away anything. He carefully unwraps it and takes out the vinyl cover. “Oh wow,” he says, looking at the cover on the front, a photo you took of him and his friends last Halloween. He smiles, looking up at you, before he goes back to inspecting the cover and turning it around. He looks up at a soft smile of the picture of you looking at him, love evident in your eyes, and him looking down laughing. “Wow, that’s amazing. Is there an album in it?” He asks, looking at the pictures again. “So, Callum did mention to me how they were getting you a record player, yes. It’s, err, actually been custom pressed, it says the songs on the cover as well,” His eyes widen. “Oh wow, that’s incredible. Holiday pub golf version oh I love that,” looking on the A side, which had the picture with his friends. He turns it around, reading the B-Side, “Tiny Dancer, Elton John, oh that’s the one that played when we went on our first date, isn’t it?” You nod, and smile at the memory. “Yeah, I wasn’t sure if you’d remember that. Side A is like, Sidemen related songs, and like, Wild Ones and then the other one is like… Songs that remind me of you, and us,” she explains. “Ooh, Wild Ones, that’s a gem. Wow, thank you, this is really cool,” he embraces you, setting the Vinyl down on his bed for a second to embrace you. “Thank you, that’s wonderful,” he whispers, pulling back to give you a kiss. You smile, and kiss him back, the same butterflies exploding as the many times before. “Harry, we have to get to the restaurant,” You remind him when you take a second to catch your breath. “Yeah, yeah.”
The group arrives at the restaurant around seven, walking there from Harry’s place. You and Harry go in first to inform the staff of the reservation, whilst the group waits outside and chats. Because it was a slightly bigger group of about 15 people that were all relatively well known, he’d rented the small upper floor that was a small extension of the restaurant that would normally fit about twenty people. You go outside to get the rest of the group and enter the cosy room, that has a classy Italian aesthetic. They’d put the tables together, so everyone could fit around, and you take place next to Harry and Callux, Ethan sitting on the other side of Harry and Chip and Callum sitting across from you. You grab his hand under the table as everyone orders their drinks, shuffling a bit closer. When everyone has ordered, the boys decide it’s time for presents, before people get too drunk or too engaged in conversations. The boys make their rounds, at least the ones that didn’t give him anything already, before it gets back to you. Harry looks at you, not expecting you to have anything from him, as you get a small box shaped wrapped present out of your bag. “Y/N, you already got me something,” He lowly says, “No, it’s just something small, please just open it,” you ask, giggling at the thought of the present. Harry reluctantly takes it, tearing off the wrapping paper. He looks at the box, opening it to reveal six golf balls. “Wait, are these…” He looks at you with a laugh on his face, and you nod. “Oh my god, that’s amazing,” he lets out a genuine laugh, taking out one of the golf balls to look at it closely. Ethan looks over, also laughing at the images on the balls. A few of the guys look confuse, so you look at them to explain it, “They’re golf balls with pictures of me on them,” you tell them, and everyone laughs, wanting to see them. When Harry has the box in front of him, now empty as the balls are being passed around, he turns towards you. “Thank you, baby, I love that,” he says, leaning a bit closer. This was kind of dangerous, knowing his friends all surrounded you, but you didn’t really care. They’d know at some point anyway. “It’s just a silly thing, but I’m glad you like it,” you say, looking into his eyes you can see his smile in. He leans closer until your lips are touching, whispering another thank you before he gives you one last peck, moving back. He moves his arm onto the back of your chair, lightly grazing your shoulder, as you see Josh looking at you with raised eyebrows.  Tobi clears his throat, “Anything you want to tell us, guys?” Harry’s eyes widen at the realization of what he’s just done, and you give him a reassuring smile. “Oh. Well, we’re, like, together. Please no big deal though, we’re just, you know,” Harry rambles, and you smile, taking his hand under his table. He briefly looks at you, and relaxes when he realizes you’re okay. “Ayy they both finally did it, everyone give it up for Harry and Y/N!” Chip exclaims as everyone cheers, and you hide on Harry’s shoulder as you chuckle in embarrassment. You sit up again and see Callux give you a small smile, leaning closer to you. “I’m glad you have each other, he has been happier because of you. And you seem more yourself, too. I’m glad,” he shared, making you smile. “Thank you, genuinely. And also for not really asking, took us a while to figure out what we wanted,” she admits, and he nods, “Of course. Oh, is it time for the thing yet?” He changes the topic, and you look back at Harry laughing with Ethan, Simon, and Callum. “Oh, yeah, can you ask Theo? He has the present,” Callux nods as you turn back to Harry, nudging him. “There’s one more present,” You say, interrupting the conversation. The boys all look at you, understanding the signal to shut up, and Harry frowns, trying to work out whom he missed.
Theo speaks up, “Okay, so, this is from all of us, really,” he tells him, looking around the group. “I do think I speak for all of us when I say you mostly have Y/N to thank, though, because she did a wonderful job working it out, but it’s a bit of a group effort, from us, to you,” He explains, handing over a square, somewhat thick, package. Harry looks around the group curiously as everyone expectantly watches him unpack it. “Harry through our eyes, a reminder of our love for you,” he reads curiously, opening the book. He opens it to a written page surrounded by group pictures of him and his friends and family. ‘Harry,’ it reads, ‘You’ve done so much for all of us, we wanted to give you something back. You mean so much to every single one of us individually, and you deserve to know. This is who you are through our eyes, hopefully you see the same magic we do in you.’ He looks up around the group, before he flips to the next page filled with crazy pictures of him. He lets out a chuckle, turning the page to see a combination of written texts and pictures. “You can read it all later, but it’s basically all of us and some more people sharing what they think about you. Stories, pictures, memories. Your parents and siblings are in it as well. Just, for whenever you need it,” you explain, as he flicks through the book. “Wow. Thank you guys, wow, that is so, umm, my god. Thank you,” he says, truly meaning it. You smile, resting your hand on his thigh. You make relaxing motions, Harry clearly a bit overwhelmed with his emotions, as he briefly looks through. “Oh wow, these are old,” he chuckles, looking at a picture Chris had taken of him the first time they’d met. He looks around the group once more. “Thank you guys, thank you,” He expresses once more, and everyone reacts with a smile, “Of course,” or some other form of reaction. Harry kisses your cheek as a thank you as he turns to you once more. “Thank you, it’s wonderful.” You smile, looking into his eyes. “You deserve to know how loved you are.”
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myriadparacosm ¡ 2 days ago
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Sitcom AU - 1. The one with the bride
wolfstar; jegulus; dorlene; panryly; rosekiller
"What I mean is that it's not right."
"Isn't that kind of homophobic?"
Marlene scowls at Pandora, who quickly pinches her lips together with a coy look, making Remus chuckles in his cup of tea.
"No, no, hear her out," Sirius cuts.
"Two male penguins?!"
"Still can't believe you didn't hear about that before," Peter mentions, stirring his new cup of coffee.
"They got an egg too?! When they have been trying to steal one but they get a reward instead?!"
"That was one solution to stop that behaviour," Remus sagely comments.
"If I did that, I wouldn't be given a child!"
"You don't want one, Marl'."
"Thank God for that too— ouch! Fuck! I'm on your side!"
"Just accept that penguins have more rizz than you," Mary says before ducking at the pillow. "Hey!"
The waitress clears her throat from behind the couch and Marlene smiles toothily at her to lose it as quickly when facing them again.
"As if you have any."
"Shouldn't we be happy that gay penguins are accepted and loved? Especially if they raised a little baby!"
"I believe, their chick was also a lesbian," Remus comments
"Their child too?!" Marlene exclaims in shock. "What is going on in this world?!"
"I could present you someone if you are that desperate," Pandora gently offers. "I have this co-"
"I don't need help!"
Sirius grimaces with a nod. "You do."
"Like you are any better, slag."
"I'm on your side!" He argues with a waving hand that she slaps away. "Cunt!"
"On her side against— queer penguins?" Peter wonders.
"I just can't bloody believe it."
"Sometimes, I wish I was a penguin," Remus mutters and pauses at all the eyes jumping on him. "Erm."
"And you call me desperate."
"You literally have a feud with penguins now?" Mary points out.
Sirius laughs before looking up just in time for James to walk in Hogwarts. Marlene sighs, not bothering to glance since these two always predict whenever their other half is around.
"Hi James!" Pandora greets.
"Hey," he grins even if it's a tad sadder than usual while he puts his wet umbrella against the rack already full. "Whatcha talking about?" He asks, sitting down next to Sirius who scooted over and immediately puts his arm on his shoulders.
"Marlene discovered animals can be queer," Peter explains. "And wants to fight a couple of penguins."
James laughs, turning to her. "But that's so cute!"
She scowls at him. "They have it so easy while we have to bloody pay taxes and they got a marriage and child for free, how is that right?!"
Mary leans toward James. "She got a bad date last night and-" she shrieks at the kick in her back, getting her face smashed in the couch's bottom. Marlene cackles evily just as Mary rounds on her. "You better not have used your shoes on my new shirt!"
The waitress pays them no mind, used to their antics, as she nods at James' order before walking behind the counter.
"Knee."
"You're such a cunt. Don't come whine to me about pain from your trainings because I'm never massaging you again."
"You alright, Prongs?" Peter asks. "Where is Lily?"
He shrugs. "I'm alright. She had work to do so," he says and smiles at Sirius who squeezes him with his arm. "I'm really fine. Just a bit bummed out."
Remus offers a supportive smile, leaning out of his armchair to pat his knee. "You're still friends."
James sighs and takes the cuppa from the waitress' hands with a polite smile. "I know… It's just that I kind of hoped her- us, to be it."
"It's her loss, mate," Sirius says with a startle at Remus' slap on his arm. "What?! It's the truth!"
"Lily is our friend too," he retorts with a pointed look but Sirius only rolls his eyes.
"At least it ended well."
"It might be awkward for some time but everything will be fine," Pandora promises. "You just can't picture her naked anymore."
James blushes. "I wasn't going to! And I know that, I'm just disappointed that it ended up— like that."
"You two dated quite quickly," Mary points out. "It's not that uncommon to realise that despite your attraction, you were both better off as friends."
"And that she is a lesbian."
James scowls at Marlene. "First off, she was almost never attracted to anyone before. Second, she is attracted to me. Third, she is trying to figure it out so don't push her around, Marl'."
Pandora nods. "Yes, I want Lily to stay our friend too. She is lovely."
"Why do you assume I'm going to bully her? I'm just sharing facts!"
"Because you are one," Mary sniffs and flips her off when she sticks her tongue out.
James watches them with an amused grin and meets Sirius' eyes with his own unsure gaze. "She would like that too but she is worried. I told her that it doesn't change anything but…"
Sirius pats his cheek before petting his hair. "Don't worry. I'm sure it will be fine."
"She might only need some time," Remus agrees.
"Breakups, as nice as it went for you two, is still hard," Mary adds with a sorry look. "You were both— intense."
Peter shares the sentiment with a nod as they watch James drinks his cuppa and Sirius brushes his wet hair to cheer him up. He smiles at them, lips wordless for several tries before rolling his shoulders.
"I still love Lily, maybe not as much as a lover like I wanted but at least we are. She offered me a chance to try and… If I'm honest, I felt it for a while."
"Oh, Prongs."
"No, it's fine," he promises with a quick comforting smile at Sirius. "I was happy. Think she was too but you know, no sparks or anything. Comfy but more like friends with benefits rather than lovers."
"Shouldn't it be like that?" Marlene wonders, putting down her cup on the coffee table. "Maybe you only got through the honeymoon part."
"We can't really judge on that," Peter slowly says. "No one has been in a serious relationship more than you. Even Re-"
"Let's not talk about him," Remus interrupts.
Sirius glances at him before settling back on James. "I'm sure there is someone out there that will give you all the sparks you want."
James sighs. "It's stupid but I had everything planned. Now I have to plan another wedding, with someone else, in God knows when but I want to find my soulmate-"
"Lobster-"
"To build our lives together and get married," he finishes with a fond but torn expression.
The doors of Hogwarts slam open and the rain furiously takes advantage of that small gap before it closes after a figure stumbles through on heels. The cafe falls silent, everyone doing a double-take at the long white wedding dress, beautiful despite its soggy state.
"And I want a pony!" Pandora blurts out with eager eyes at the apparition.
The disheveled black hair clashes with the long veil scrunched up in it while the bride frantically looks around with wide bloodshot eyes, which almost pops out of her skull when landing on a gaping Sirius.
"Oh my God," he gasps out, hand frozen in a tangle of James' hair as he straightens up in his seat.
With blank and tears brewing eyes, the bride stumbles to the couch, completely missing the step of the entry but she saves herself with a thunderous look and nails digging into the couch.
"Sirius! Oh my God, there you are," she gasps out.
"Holy crap," Marlene blurts out.
Sirius stares at the bride before jumping out of his seat. "What are you doing here?!"
The bride scowls, angrily pulling at her skirt before throwing it to point out the obvious. "I went by your apartment but then I only found your landlord who told me you might be here-- which you are and I finally found you..," her voice cracks the more it goes as her already ashen face blanches.
Sirius is quite close to follow her by the weak step he takes but stops himself. James is as flabbergasted as him but by his frown he mights have recognized her. Remus glances between them before almost inching over the edge, ready to stand up.
"Pads?"
"Hum, would you like a cuppa?" The waitress asks with a worried frown.
The bride almost glares at her, ramming her dress in one hand, before turning back to Sirius.
"I need your help-"
"How the hell are you even here?! Found me?"
"Sirius can't actually be secretly married, is he?" Peter whispers but Remus is at lost of words.
"I know all your whereabouts."
"Can someone explain to me what's happening?!" Mary exclaims with a barely hushed tone, leaning against Pandora's shoulders to stare at them closer.
Sirius jerks, glancing frantically at them until he lands back on the bride who started to breath heavily.
"Oh my God, breathe!" James says, standing up with a gesture at the couch. "Sit down, catch your breathe."
She ignores him. "I need your help, Sirius-"
"Did you just run out of a wedding?!" He exclaims.
"Yes, mine! You— ne fais pas l'idiot !" She argues with big gasps of air, chest bobbing not by much despite the speed under her corset. "I ran off because I couldn't do it, not anymore. I… I just can't. I had to crawl through a window but I had no idea where to go except to you," she gasps out with a fever splattered on her cheeks, "I think I broke my ankle because of these stupid heels."
Sirius takes a deep breath, leaning onto the couch to look at her legs, before looking up. "What's your shoe size? 13, right?"
"What? No, I'm not a child anymore, Sirius! 5," She says, exasperated.
Every patron are still watching when Sirius jumps over the coffee table to get to Mary. She can barely make a noise before her shoes are grabbed and she shrieks when Sirius only tugs harder.
"Sirius! Stop!" She shrieks, clawing at the rug when she is dragged, before throwing a disbelieving look at them. "Wha- can anyone help me?!" She gasps when one of her shoes finally gives up and Sirius almost falls on Pandora before he does the same for the second shoe.
No one moves and even the bride seems stunned by Sirius, who walks up to him to hand him over Mary's shoes. James gapes at them.
"Padfoot?"
"My shoes?!"
"Free heels."
Sirius throws blindly the pair of sparkly heels on the couch, helping the bride stay upright as she tries to put Mary's shoes on with one hand while the other shakily holds on the dress. Mary, baffled, glances at the heels before taking them with a shrug.
"Sirius?" Remus cautiously calls.
"Don't come in the apartment for like, an hour at least!" He calls as he leads the bride outside, helping her as keeps tripping despite the new shoes.
They watch them through the windows, along with everyone else, while Sirius hastily tries to untangle the veil from her long black hair before throwing it out on the street as they disappear around the corner. Pandora turns to gape at them in excitement.
"What just happened?!"
Remus slightly shakes his head and turns to James. "Prongs?"
He jerks to face them, still standing in front of the couch, and his mouth finally shuts with a loud noise. "Huh?"
"Have an idea who that was?"
"She looked a lot like Sirius," Peter comments.
James nods, clearly in his thoughts, before sitting down with a last look at the windows. "It's Regulus."
"Who?"
"Sirius' brother."
"Sirius has a brother?" Peter asks in disbelief. "Since when?!"
Mary frowns. "Hum, then explain why his brother was wearing heels and wearing a wedding dress? Stealing my shoes?"
"You are wearing the heels," Pandora points out.
"Because he stole them and they are clearly expensive— even if they don't fit with my current jeans."
"He is trans," Remus says. "That's the brother who didn't want to run away with him when they were younger?"
James nods, glancing at the windows again. "Regulus."
"You knew?! How come didn't I know?" Peter asks.
"Wait, is he a trans man or a trans woman because I'm lost," Pandora interjects.
"Trans man," James explains. "He— well, their parents aren't quite accepting that part but he still stayed with them. That's why he looks so… not."
"God, was that a forced marriage and forcing him to stay a woman?" Mary asks in horror. "Wait, is it Regulus as a man or? Strange name."
"That's the name he picked for himself."
"You knew him from your private fancy school?" Peter wonders and looks at Remus. "But you weren't there, so how did you know?"
"Erm, Sirius might have mentioned it to me," he admits. "Barely…"
"Oh my God, their parents must be going crazy. They are just insane-"
"Holy crap, Sirius with tits is hot." James stares in disbelief at Marlene, finally coming back to earth by the looks of it with a slight scoff. "What?! I never thought that would happen! And they look terrifyingly similar!"
"I thought his family was in France," Remus mentions, confused. "How did Regulus find Sirius like that?"
"Should we go check on them maybe?" Pandora asks, straightening up on her knees. "He said to not come to the apartment but maybe we can bring some warm food and drinks for them. Make Regulus feel welcome."
James gasps. "Do you think he is going to stay?"
Marlene frowns at him. "Wait… Didn't you have this huge crush on Regulus?! I remember something about Sirius' sibling!"
Mary cackles at James' vivid blush. He makes a rude gesture at her while Pandora smiles fondly at him, joining him on the couch to rub his shoulder. Remus smiles with a sorry on his lips, remembering James' infatuation on his best friend's brother back when they met during university where Sirius only showed up sometimes to visit with no mention of any sibling except for James.
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changingplumbob ¡ 6 hours ago
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Chatting about Dating Deanna - Reece Edition
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At Devin's insistence Deanna has agreed to take a trip to Thrift Tea or whatever it's called to let Devin try find her some outfits for the show. Not being a shopper herself she's convinced her best friend Reece to come along since they have similar fashion tastes.
Reece: I just can't believe you're actually doing it
Deanna: Yeah well, you've found your person haven't you. You seem happy. I want in on that. But not with you and Samir because ew. Do you want to see the pictures from the first lot of applications
Reece: I would but... you know I only like guys. I would just say they're all cute and have nothing else to offer. Talk to me once you've met them
Deanna: Deal
Devin: Oh! Oh! What about this one???
Deanna: Devin it's a dress. Try again
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Reece: But you've worn dresses before. Like at prom
Deanna: I will wear some dresses if she insists but they have to be the fashion style I like
Devin: Don't worry De I am on it. Oh Luna, what do you think of this one for you? Gorgeous and pink
Deanna: Devin and Norah have been working on challenges for the contestants and honestly I'm a bit scared with their brains. Like are the people there to woo me or play survivor?
Reece: Well yeah but whoever wins will have to put up with Devin
Devin: HEY! I heard that and I'm fabulous
Reece: I just mean you've got her and Artemisia and Joey, they'll need to be able to handle your family
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Deanna: True
Reece: I've been thinking about my contribution
Deanna: Okay genius, dazzle me
Reece: Joey was mumbling something about not being able to call households households because of something watcher related and I thought... give them group names!
Deanna: What?
Reece: For when they're in the villa with you. And you can name them... after robots! Because you like building robots
Deanna: That is the most geek idea I have ever heard
Reece: Yeah well I'm a young adult now, I've embraced being a geek
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Devin: Ohhhhh! What about this one?
Reece: That dress does actually look nice
Deanna: *sighs* Since I like the colour I suppose I'll try it on
Devin: YES! Okay Lu see if you can find some matching shoes
Deanna: But Reece there won't be enough robot names for all the rounds so think of some other names options please. Less geeky ones would be great, I am not a geek after all
Reece: Maybe not but you are a tech head
Devin: De come on! Dress up time
Deanna: You know if being trans was a decision and not a state of being I'd be tempted to say Devin's constant dress up games when we were kids made Emisia a girl
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7 spots available!
Dating Deanna - Contestant List, Challenge Overview, Joey's Contestant Creation Walkthrough, F.A.Q, All In Guide
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bigassmoth ¡ 3 days ago
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Tokyo Debunker x Reader: Food Delivery Headcanons
2nd person, sfw, various characters make sure reader is fed after learning about their less than stellar eating habits (this is written from the perspective of someone who forgets to eat so it will be biased towards that interpretation)
Haru: You are now one of the critters under his care- he would prefer to personally make sure you are fed but will also send Ren or Towa to deliver your meals when he is too busy. He especially enjoys having you over for meals at the Jabberwock dorm because you can (help him babysit--) get some animal therapy while you eat. The stuff he brings you is basic but homemade and good on the go- sandwiches, onigiri, waffles. If he finds out you missed a meal he scolds you for not paying attention to your health and does a lot of ranting about how important it is to eat so you have the energy to go about your day. He always has snacks on him so if you are in the middle of the day and feel yourself suddenly becoming lethargic, he is a good person to bump into. Has mixed up your people food with animal food before-- oopsie daisy. "Dont'cha worry! I have them all labeled now, see?", the kind of guy to have no sense of 'indirect kiss' and will fully share food, utensils, and straws with you. Kaito lets out an ungodly shriek the first time he sees Haru pass you his water bottle and you take a drink without blinking.
Yuri: In disbelief at first, "What? You just, don't eat?" he can't judge seeing as he also skips meals/eats poorly but that's different! He is too busy with his research to spend time with something as trivial as food. But you are one of his patients and he isn't going to allow his patient to decline over something so trivial. Floods your phone with texts three times a day reminding you to eat and refusing to let up until you confirm that you have/are eating. If you lie to him about it and he finds out, he will start demanding pictures. Ironically this means his own eating habits also improve because reminding YOU reminds him (or rather, he complains about it to Jiro who goes "oh yeah" and reheats him some pasta or something). Yuri is now fully incentivized to give you surprise checkups whenever he sees you, pulling you aside in the hallway to bark out questions "Are you tired? How much water have you had today? You are down 200 calories from where you SHOULD be at 1pm."
Sho and Hyde: These two are a pair because Sho only learns about your habits from Hyde, who is half-concerned and half "lol the honor student is eating soup for the 6th day in a row". After hearing this, Sho can't look at you without feeling the compulsion to fill you up like he's a grandma who survived a famine by eating leather shoes. You can't just eat soup- your diet won't be balanced. You need more meat on your bones, you need more protein to grow and retain muscle. You aren't processing your vitamins you need more fat in your diet. It annoys him more than Leo. When Hyde decides to bother his sweet baby brother, Sho puts him to work delivering food to you. "I bet that idiot hasn't even had lunch yet. Why don't you try being a respectable teacher for once and do something?". Bonus points, because of your habits Hyde takes to 'rewarding' students in class for answering questions by throwing packets of food at them (think granola bars, fruit gummies, etc).
Rui: At first he thought it would be romantic. Coming to your side with food, your surprise and gratitude at how considerate he is. He quickly stopped being sappy and started being concerned. "I know a good place for a romantic meal! Unless you have somewhere else you want to go?<3 huh? you already ate? It's 7am when could you have eate- what the fuck are you doing up at 4am!?" Ed is not helpful. "Oh do humans need to eat everyday? Ah...such a delicate species you a-COUGHCOUGHCOU--". But by fussing over you he realizes how bad he is at taking care of himself- sure a ghoul is more durable than a human and can go a while without feeling the effects of hunger but that doesn't mean he should neglect his health. He has taken to making little bentos at his bar for himself and you- using lots of flower and heart shaped cutters. The meals are small and modest but it gives the perfect energy boost you need to get through evening missions.
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gradmacoco ¡ 22 hours ago
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COLLEGE AUE
Nanami kento × reader[ lora 'Lorraine' Durchdenwald]
Her name...
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Lora moved to Japan after her mother remarried. She liked her mom's husband he was cool in her eye's at least and honestly a better dad than her real father....her parents divorced when she was 10 and after that, life has been.....shitty.....At the ripe age of 14, after ooh so many visits to the hospital and finally a psychiatrist she found out she has ^borderline personality disorder ^
And honestly even now at the ripe age of 20,
SHE STILL DOESN'T GET IT
"Borderline.....borderline? Like borderline to what exactly I don't get it?....what does that even mean?"
Her psychiatrist explained and explained but she just couldn't get it....all she knew was bpd is not fully understood and the cause of it is mostly childhood trauma and maybe..neglect? Was I a neglected kid? What childhood trauma? what traumatised me?.....oh my father. 
Either way, her moving with her mom to Japan was her way of starting anew.
New friends, New life,  New people, New scenery, new school.....shit.
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Fast track to the present.....
"Shit shit shit shit shit...AH! Where is it?"
You couldn't find your other sock, you swear that it was probably playing hide and seek with you. "oooh god please where are you?" you asked as if you're sock could reply to you...as if it could say "I'm over here lora under the fridge" you thought to
you're self... if only socks had locators.
"Oooh my god Lora!...it's 7 AM....A.M, why are you being so LOUDE?" Said your best friend from the other side of the room.
"I'm looking for my other sock...I can't find it..the pair"
"WHAT!... Just wear different socks Lora it's no big deal"
"NOOOO! THESE SOCKS GO WITH THESE SHOES! Me changing my socks is gonna ruin the whole.....aesthetic of it all..."
You're best friend just didn't get it... you're wearing sweatpants that cover up your shoe a little, no one was even going to see your socks even if you were to wear mix-matched socks no one would recognise. It's all so ridiculous to her.
"Lora... no one will even be able to see your socks, do you know that?" You looked down at your sweatpants. " ooooh yeah....they won't see..." The girl on the other side of the shared bedroom sighed. "Sooo..just get any sock and get out of here...JEEZZ"
You looked at yourself.....why was I panicking about a stupid sock anyway?
As you're now opting to just wear any sock, you get your side-body bag and as you are about to rush out of your shared student apartment... Aiko calls out to you.....
"Hey Lora.."
"What now Aiko?... I'm not bein-"
"Don't forget you're meds, gurl"
" oooh yeah, almost did"
You take your pills as you always do, it's been 6years since you got diagnosed, and 5 since you started your medications, but your still not used them.
"What would I ever be without you Aiko...my one and  only true love"
"A mess thats you'd be"
"Ncoooo I love you toooo"
"Ain't you gonna be late for class?"
You're friend smiled as you blowed her a kiss goodbye and rushed out.
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Thank god campus was just a 15minutes walk...9 if you're being fast enough.
You got to class and lucky for you the lecture wasn't there yet.
"looks like they're running late too"
you took a seat in the middle, and you thought to yourself that in every classroom setting, the middle seats were always the safest from being spotted and pointed at.  More and more people started coming in , the lecture also got in, and business class started.
During class... you could sense someone's eye's on you. Whoever they are sure liked looking. You never turned to see who it was..because honestly, you're just scared about who it could be, too scared of being looked at like you're an outsider...you've experienced it before....all because of you're appearance, and you were not in the mood for that right now.
Class ended and you had a 1-hour opening till your next class. Walking out, you could still feel those eyes on you....as you walked out you turned you're head to look at the back to try and see who it could be, but being short-sightedness and not wearing your glasses right now cost you not being able to see who it was...
But one thing you sure about whoever they were...one of them had blonde hair and the other brown?...nah maybe black?....somewhere in between probably and the other brown....it's 3 people.
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NANAMIS POV.....
From the moment Nanami got in class and laid his eyes on you...he couldn't stop himself from staring. You were oh so captivating to him, the whole duration of class he spent just drinking you in.
It was the way you placed you're chin to the heel of your palm, how you chewed at your pen, your lips as they pathed, granting the pen passage for you to chew at it more, the beauty spot on the right side of your lips, oh and your eyes. The moment he caught a glimpse of them as you walked out of class, beautiful brown eyes he could look at them forev-
"Nanami!..stop staring at like her that man" Hiromi said to Nanami as he snapped out of his daze.
"Class is over?" Nanami asked, as if his been paying attention at all.
"what is wrong with you today? Don't you think it's too early to be dozing off in class? Seriously man are you okay?" Said the haibaira with a look of concern, in his years of knowing Kento he had never been one to get distracted in class so easily, so this was new to him.
" I'm ...okeyyy, I just....who was that girl?"
"Which girl? ....you do know that the class has like.. almost 20 girls right? Meaning you have to be specific on who you're talking abo-" haibaira was cut off by Hiromi
" His talking about the girl who just left now"
" oooh well, I didn't see her sooo....."
"She has....like curly hair.....or something, she's the only person with such curly hair in class, yu"
"Oooh yeah, I see her...that girl with an ungodly amount of green things, wait... Nanami" haibaira looked at his friend with a childish grin and then looked at Hiromi who just nodded at haibaira as they both came to the conclusion and acknowledgement that ... Nanami had a little crush.
"She has an awful amount of green things, don't you think?" Nanami said to himself, remembering how almost all your stationery was a different shade of green, even your phone case was green.
"She must like green a lot then"
"Nanami...you're thinking out loud," said Haibaira
"Oooh sorry..."
"I wonder what her name is....."
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OOOH GOD please be nice you'll, I'm new to THISSSS GAMEEE.
Anywayyyyy what do guys think? Let me know if I have to improve anything please I'd really appreciate it (*^^*)
P.S.
👁👄👁and I'll make a filler chapter where I talk about reader aka [ Lora 'Lorraine' Durchdenwald] lore when I wake up from my 10 hours of much-needed sleep 😴
byeeeeeeee love you all🫶 (^-^)(^-^)/
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jellyskink ¡ 3 hours ago
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The Doc is OUT (For the day.)
"Callie I'm home! And I got you a treeaattt~!"
Irene's voice rang through her studio apartment with a mix of excitement and weariness. She was finally done with work for the day, seeing her child was what she was looking forward to the most after today.
(Hm... I don't see her waiting for me at the door as usual, where could she be?)
Unceremoniously kicking off her shoes next to door, she tosses her jacket onto her sofa, after which she follows suit onto.
Today was just like any other, day in and day out from the medical office. The same car troubles, the same usual bickering with Mr. Ibis, the same dang stress of worrying how soon the world as she knew it was going to end, but on top of it all off, she had another appointment with Dr. Stanford Filbrick Pines that day.
(I just don't get that guy. Nothing about his lifestyle or even state of being makes sense! This is the first time in my entire career I can't figure out SOME kind of pattern with my patient.)
Dr. Pine's entire situation confused her, and the cherry on top was that his medical records were just as confusing and a mess to figure out.
(I just don't get it, there's such a wide gap of time between any kind of medical logs that have information on Dr.Pines. It's almost like he went MISSING for a while in his life.)
Thinking about this all really made her headache worse. Her hands reached up to her temples as she began to massage them gently. It didn't help much, but it was better than nothing.
Irene found herself sighing loudly as an adorably unearthly meow rang in her ear and she felt an otherworldly ball of fur lay on her head.
"mRrowww..."
"Daww hello my little angel! I missed you so much!"
Her hands immediately went from her own to the incomprehensiblely adorable ball of fur that gave her so much reason in her life. She was her baby, her adorable little cat Calamari.
Calamari happily purred in response to Irene's affection. Irene knew she was a walking trope of a lonely cat lady who treated her cat like her own flesh and blood, but she didn't care. Calamari was really the only family she had right now, and the foolish trope was one that was lame anyway.
"Guess what? I got you a treat while I was out today! It's your favorite! A tuna flavored cat biscuit!"
Reaching into her pocket, Irene revealed the cat biscuit to her fluffy friend. Before she had the chance to unwrap it, she felt it dematerialize from her hand like it was going out of style.
"Haha! I knew you'd love it! You're so cute!!"
Alright so Callie rarely ate with her mouth and preferred to absorb most food items into her third eye. It wasn't normal but it was very much still adorable! Even if staring into said eye for too long made you space out and question life for twenty minutes.
Calamari happily rubbed her head onto Irene's hand after finishing her treat.
(I know there isn't a ton of reliable studies that show animals such as cats can thank people, but Callie's a smart kitty, I'm sure she knows how! It definitely wouldn't be the weirdest thing she could do. Hmm, it is getting pretty late now, I should probably get dinner taken care of, I'm pretty hungry right now myself.)
With a sigh and movements as graceful as she could, she picked up Calamari and cradled her as she reached for her phone and opened up her flipphone.
(I... really don't feel like cooking today. You know what? I'm going to splurge and get takeout tonight.
But what? Chinese? No I need to watch my sodium intake... Spaghetti Bolognese from that one Italian restaurant a couple blocks down? Tempting as that is one of my favorite foods, and the owner does owe me a couple of favors themselves, but then again I get that a lot, I don't want to get tired of it by accident...)
Calamari flopped around in her arms playfully as she contemplated what she wanted to eat.
(Ah of course! Why didn't I think of it sooner! Pizza! It isn't the healthiest choice either, but I could seriously go for it right now! Now where did I put that one pizza place's number...)
After what felt like eternity waiting for her pizza delivery order, Irene heard a knock on the door as she opened it. The pizza she ordered placed politely on top of her cat shaped doormat, looking as much as a treasure as an ancient relic in the moment.
(Gotta say I'm glad I'm able to pay by card for this... I'm really not in the mood to talk right now to anyone.)
Happily taking the pizza into her home, Irene flopped down onto her couch, Calamari immediately following suit.
The pizza was as delectable as ambrosia in that moment. The crust was perfectly golden brown and spiced with italian seasoning, the sauce was the perfect balance of sweet and savory, spiced to perfection, and the cheese and pepperoni on top was the perfect way to end the wonderful layers of the pizza pie. And was that basil added on top? It was!!
The pizza was cut into squares, triangle pizza at least for the past year wasn't very popular with establishments or certain people, especially if it was just a cheese pizza, but that didn't matter at all to Irene.
Before she knew it Irene found herself eating the entire pizza, sharing some of the cheese and pepperoni with Calamari since that was her favorite part to eat.
(Ah I didn't mean to indulge so much tonight... well you know what? It was delicious! Who knows how long it's been since I last ate a nice meal that WASN'T something from the hospital cafeteria...)
Calamari at this point was sleeping next to Irene on the couch, satisfied and happily napping.
(Daw... I'm glad she liked it too, thank goodness the ingredients in this are alright to give to her in moderation, I have trouble saying no to my darling little Calamari!)
Noticing the time, Irene decided it was time to get ready for bed. There were patients to see and work for her to do tomorrow.
(I really want to wear my comfiest and favorite pajamas tonight, where are they? I know I washed them and had them in my pile of clean laundry on my bed... aha! Here they are!)
Irene quickly threw on her favorite pajamas, an oversized nightshirt with the words "Live, Laugh, CatMom" printed on it in cursive accompanyed by a silly picture of a cat Irene absolutely adored. Paired with it were her flowy and comfortable pajama bottoms, decorated with pictures of cats with silly mustaches.
(Finally done for the day, I really should fold my laundry and put it away... Ehhh I'll do it tomorrow. For now I'll just put the clothes and the basket on my dinnertable.)
Nighttime quickly began to set as Irene sat at her worn down antique vanity desk. The stars were beautiful at this hour, glittering throughout the night, they were one of the only things that stayed consistent and normal in Irene's life.
(Geez, no matter how many times I look at myself in the mirror I can't help but notice how quickly time passes. Stress really isn't doing your already awkward looks any favors... Maybe I need to change up my look again? But how?
Maybe I should get back into trying to learn makeup and more "modern" fashion... Or maybe a new haircut? Maybe not that latter option, I'm quite happy with my bob, it's certainly been easier to care for my hair lately, and I'm not sure I could pull off anything shorter or more... "Adventurous.")
"Mrrroww??" With a quick leap, Calamari jumped onto the desk, knocking over a few cosmetics, toiletries, and photos while doing so.
"Woah! Careful my dear! Haha you always seem to know when something is bothering me..."
*Sigh* "I suppose I'm just worried about myself again is all. You know me, whenever I'm not worrying about how I look, I worry about my work."
(I guess I just, never expected my life to go this way I suppose. Cipher really did throw a wrench into a lot of my plans in life. I mean, did anyone expect any of this to happen? I'm ashamed to admit I was arrogant in the beginning, I believed this all couldn't be possible, that it'd be solved soon if anything, I believed it couldn't cause as much problems and dangers to the world as it did...)
"You know what they say, every rose has it's thorn, although I certainly feel like I have more thorns than rose sometimes..."
(I'll never forget my first reaction to being sent out as a part of the group of doctors to help the people evacuating Gravity Falls. There was so much panic, so much chaos, and some of the wounds I had to patch up weren't anything you'd ever normally deal with even if you worked in the ER.
It almost seemed unreal, that any moment someone would say "cut" and it would end like a movie.)
(It's these kind of moments of panic that really make me childishly wish that the world of medical science was as simple as we believed it was as kids, that all it really took was being rushed to the infirmary, some rest, a bandaid, and some care to heal whatever was hurting somone.)
(But that wasn't how things were. It was much more complicated than that, and the kicker was that you always held your patient's life in your line like a tether. Whenever that tether broke and you couldn't help fix it no matter how hard you tried, having to tell the patient's family their loved one was gone... It's almost too much to bear sometimes.)
"I'm so thankful I have you though Callie, I really think you're one of the only good things to come out of this mess and into my life."
"Woof!"
"Haha!! That's a new one! You never cease to surprise me girl! That and the weird things you sometimes bring me home..."
(When she was younger it was normal stuff like mice, small birds, and insects. Nowadays it was much more... weird. When it wasn't something like a gnome panicking for it's life or an eyebat, it was random items.)
(At first it was pretty normal, like a sparkly pink ribbon probably used to tie up hair or something, black nail polish, or what I'm assuming is someone's art project for pins of what I'm guessing is a top hat and bow tie??)
(Then it became weirder and more varied. For example, she once brought home a weird plush that resembles Dr. Pines in a way. That one in particular was odd because I don't think I've ever seen Dr. Pines smile in such a showboating way, let alone wear anything that wasn't of any semblance to "his muse". The suit seemed normal but the fez was definitely the weirdest thing.)
(Most recently she brought home some kind of sentient gummy lizard-snake thing. It had jumped out of my hands when I had tried to take it outside to release it, and I still haven't found it to this day. Sometimes I swear spot it moving around somewhere from the corner of my eye while I'm at home...)
"Anyways, how about we head to bed? I know I'm tired today after an exhausting day!"
(I'll clean up my vanity later, it's certainly getting way too late for me to be up at this hour...)
With that, Irene promptly headed to bed with Calamari following in tow. She promptly fell asleep quickly after laying her head down, despite wanting to spend some more time thinking about things.
Unbeknownst to her though, up high in a corner of the wall of her apartment, was a cute little housespider sitting on it's web.
Of course the next morning Calamari would be found by Irene playing with this exact spider.
A cute little spider, with a strange pattern that strangely looked like a certain evil dorito with an eye. :)
(I'm really glad you and others liked my cringey fanfiction! It definitely surprised me and had me smiling ear to ear!
I hope you don't mind I kinda winged it with Oleander's character. I thought she kinda gave off the vibes of a tomboy/tomboy in her youth while also the vibes of the "determined doctor" trope. Hopefully this doesn't clash with your actual ideas for her? I love the idea too of her being a dorky cat lady too lol.
I seriously loved the details you made about Calamari! I thought it'd be funny if her teleporting power also let her travel dimensions for funsies, because imagine all of the mischief she could cause! Especially if she likes to steal Bill and Ford's stuff the most lmaoo.)
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I LOVE cat mom Oleander!! And Calamari stealing stuff from other universes? PERFECT. I DEEPLY hope she steals things from other AU Fords!
And, Ford. Honey. Baby. Calamari isn't the reason you lost the cat show.
(I think I'll call this ask fiction! I'll put these in that tag, for those who want to find them again!! c: )
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grahstumhurts ¡ 10 hours ago
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3. "The Cutest pair"
Cheerleader!Megan x Loser Band member! Reader
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A/N - Lowk "the cutest pair" by Regina song vibes but not exactly.
Wednesday comes fast, One moment you're hanging out at Megan's house, The other you're suddenly at a cheer practice which you never saw yourself at till you reconciled with Megan.  You're sitting on the bleachers, Megan’s letterman laid over your shoulders as you scroll on your phone. It feels performative, While on one hand for years and years you only pined for her. But now that you have her, Kind of, it's conflicting. It's not real, But damn do you wish it was. You hope part of her, wishes it’s real too.
“Hey” Megan yells from the grassy field, Giving you her signature puppy eyed smile. It melts a cold spot of resentment in your heart. “Come down, we are gonna go get food.” She blows you a kiss, Her friends giggle at her antics as they collect their things. You race down the steps into her wide open arms. Her scent lingering with her perfume and now combined with sweat.
“Hi, Megs” You kiss her sweaty cheek. “Gross your all sweaty, Go change.” 
“What? you don't like it?” She rubs her arms on you, Her friends whisper from the side, glancing between the two of you.
“What so you two are like, Actually dating?” Her friend Anya waves her finger around, gesturing at you.
“I thought I told you I was seeing Yn?” Megan slips her arms off your shoulders, Looking confused.
“I thought that it was just for us to stop setting you up with Greg. He really likes you,” Another one, whose name you don't know, comments.
“Just because Greg is Quinn’s brother doesn't mean I'm going to like him. He's clapped if anything, and not my type.” Megan sighs, rubbing her forehead in distress.
“Plus I am very happy with my current situation right now.” she wraps an arm around your waist to pull you into a side hug.
“I'm gonna head home, i'll talk to you guys later” She collects the last of her things and shoves them into her duffle bag, You follow behind her closely. As you pass her “So-Called” friends, you glare at them on your way out.
“Your strong for that, you know?” You bump shoulders with her while walking to your car, she leans against the hood. 
“You wanna come over to mine or just go to your house?” You grasp her hand into yours, rubbing your thumb in between the ridge between her forefinger and thumb, Trying to soothe some of her nerves. 
“I dont wanna go home just yet,” She looks down at her feet, her bags next to her shoes.
“So?” You question the meaning behind that.
“Honestly just wanna be somewhere with you,”
“Oh,” She fidgets with her fingers,
“Unless you have somewhere to be tonight, Totally fine if you do.” She gives you a grin to hide some of the hurt from this afternoon.
“I don't,” You pause. Thinking about things to do, for just the two of you. “Why don't we go to my house, Pick up some food and go for a picnic tonight?”
“Really?” The thought of being alone with her, at the park, on a blanket, Just looking at the stars. It doesn't frighten you somehow. As much as it seemed like dating her would be a dream when you had a crush on her, its not as scary as you made it out to be previously. You two hop in the car and head off to your house,
“You wanna make a pit stop at the grocery store for some snacks?” You grip the wheel with one hand, The other holding hers. She nods,
“I wanna get some Fox’s Jam’n cream, They are so good.” You chuckle at her, "I've been so obsessed with them recently"
“Well let's not get too excited, This grocery store is kinda limited at times.” You pull into the store parking lot. 
-
“Ohhh! I used to eat these all the time after school as a kid” You pull out one of your favourite snacks, A packet of seaweed rice crackers (A/N Yes those are actually my favourites)
“I remember, You would never share with me.” She snickers, Remembering the times as kids you two shared. “I used to get so mad cause i shared my snacks with you”
“Fair enough, Kid me was kind of a bitch.”
“Kind of? Understatement” Megan coughs out the other half of her sentence. You shove her shoulder, giggling.
“Your laughs really pretty” She blurts out. When she realises what she says her face turns red.
“Thanks, Meg.” Your face feels hot when her words settle in your brain.
 She thinks your laugh is pretty. 
Your laugh is pretty. 
Is pretty. 
Pretty. 
You two silently shove more snacks into the cart, adding in some drinks along the way. The silence isn't uncomfortable, Like it used to be. But usually before she would fill the gaps in conversation with funny thoughts that pop in her mind. It's more relaxed, one could say that the two of you look like you’ve been dating for years. The silence is warm and it smells of citrus and vanilla.
(A/n if your perfume is vanilla scented just pretend that its whatever your scent is)
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softmagenta ¡ 10 hours ago
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android models #4
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Having achieved the basic result, androids began to think about becoming more unusual, more stylish. Real people, indeed - they're just like us. There are too many non-standard models, especially their hybrids and their altered versions. (Clipping from a fashion magazine; article on unique “fashionable” android models that have a narrower focus) ────────────────────────────────
Molis Lux
One of the most unusual models - I can admit it! The gel used mainly to fill the joints has become this model's “skin”. Although the gel here is just an outer shell, it covers the entire body so abundantly that the internal skeleton and mechanisms are not visible from the outside at all.
Readers ask, “Why don't they have mouths?”. This is a very interesting story! A great many custom models were put into production during the “teenage android fashion rebellion” (ha-ha, I like that unofficial name so much). Unconventionality, flamboyance, brashness and unbelievable solutions! The release of many non-standard models was accompanied by some sort of pathos slogan that carried a certain rebellious meaning. The slogan of this model is “I don't need a mouth to tell about myself”. Translated into calm language, it means something like “I don't even need to talk about myself so you could all know what I'm like.” It's ridiculous, considering they can speak anyway, but the symbolism is really interesting.
The gel color usually matches the iris color of the eyes, and the face and hair are usually a different color because they are not created from the gel. These models are basically a custom created body, not something from mass produced androids, so it's up to the customer to choose the color palette. But at the very beginning of this model's release, a few test androids were created (a few hundred, I think. As with all other models), and in that case the colors were randomized by the software.
Under certain conditions, the gel can go into a soft state where the android themselves (while wearing special gloves!) or someone else can mold the body into whatever they want. Many ML models create clothes for themselves in this way by simply molding them out of their body, and the lack of clothes (molded or real) would not mean that the android is naked. Very handy! The model itself is really one of the most comfortable, I think. (And the mouth can always be made at official accessories and details ComCenter showrooms, don't worry!!!) The part below the ankle and the foot is made of a harder gel, which is a substitute for shoes. It's a bit inconvenient because although such an android can walk around outside without real shoes, it still has to wash their feet every time after going indoors, so many people just wear real shoes or special “socks”. (Editor's note: so that's how they do it… by molding the certain parts? HAHA it's very cool) (Writer's note: I hate you) ────────────────────────────────
Mea Elections
One of the most modern custom models out there! ME (very symbolic name in abbreviation, by the way) is mostly used by cosplayers either social workers who work with children, or just those who see themselves in this style.
Mobility is not affected at all, despite the unusual limbs and body proportions. The main problem with this model is that all clothes have to be sewn to order or bought in specialized stores for ME models, but there are so many variations of ME that even there you can't always find something for yourself. ────────────────────────────────
Spatium Fuga
One of the oldest representatives of non-standard models! This is the very case when the representatives of the crowd, who were striving for humanoidness, decided to return to their roots and radically strengthen their “roboticism” in a more fantastic style!
This model is also mostly used by cosplayers, but less often, because the model has quite specific details. But among fashion figures, there are a lot of SF representatives! This unusual and mesmerizing look attracts the eye.
The SF line and its hybrids are so diverse that you are unlikely to meet two identical androids of this model. The design is very futuristic and everything is limited only by your imagination! However, remember that it is very expensive, and the unusual limb connectors may tear your clothes. Just a friendly reminder.
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lovelyladyabsinthewrites ¡ 2 days ago
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Pairing(s):Edward Cullen x Wolf!Reader, Jacob Black x Witch!OC, Leah Clearwater x Witch!OC
Warnings: last chapter of this series, you have been warned, time jumps, new character introduced, never know how to finish stories 🙃, mentions of smoking, curses, magic user, may be ooc for felix and demetri?, denial of feelings, confessions, imprinting
Words: 4442
Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7 Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16  Part 17  Part 18  Part 19  Part 20  Part 21  Part 22  Part 23   Part 24  Part 25  Part 26  Part 27  Part 28 Part 29  Part 30  Part 31  Part 32  Part 33 Part 34 Part 35 Part 36 Part 37 Part 38 Part 39
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Comical wasn't enough to describe the widening of Felix and Demetri's garnet eyes when they saw the sleeping Irina. They were even more unready for the numbers of the Denali clan, Cullens, and wolves all squished together in the living room. Now it was painfully clear that they were utterly outnumbered with just the two of them present. They lost whatever bit of color their faces possessed.
Especially when the witches naturally clump alongside Dieufel. Felix could taste the zing of their power in the air. It stung his nostrils and caused a fierce burn behind his eyes. Felix and Demetri must have never encountered so many witches before, if any.
Annalisse, Evita's mother, was quite the domineering presence despite the two Volturi members being the oldest in the room. She was unflinching but you got the feeling that she was more so annoyed about leaving her home. And it all seems to be focusing on a nervous-looking Evita.
Turned out that Evita hadn't exactly been telling the truth about her mother being aware of where she was. Evita's grandmother promised she wouldn't tell. After all, Annalisse was the one against Evita going out to avenge her sister's death. Late one night, Evita left home only telling her grandmother where she was going.
Anxiously tugging at the sleeves of her jacket, Evita flicks her gaze down to her shoes. Annalisse puffs out an irritated sigh before turning back to the black-clad figures. They were surrounded. Enemies all around and even waiting outside should they try to escape before coming to an agreement.
To maintain a semblance of authority, Felix curls his lips in a snarl toward her. "Do you know what you're doing here? When Aro-"
"I don't know who this Aro is. Your kind do little to scare me." Annalisse quips back and takes an aggressive step forward. "And you're not in the position to be making threats."
"She's right." Carlisle counters. "Especially when these witches have the ability to incapacitate us. The Volturi will no longer be terrorizing my family. We will continue to uphold our secret around humans, but other than that law, you will no longer govern us. The wolves are our friends and allies."
Demetri hisses and points an accusatory finger at Bella between Nadege and Evita. "We cannot ignore the fact that Miss Swan has gone back on her promise. It was the only reason we let her live."
"She's not just a human anymore." Nadege slyly grins. "She's one of us."
"Even worse." seethes Felix.
"I would never reveal anyone's secret." Bella insists, her voice unwavering and full of complete control. "I'll protect it til the day I die."
"This 'Volturi' doesn't get to police the world. Especially when they are so ignorant of how vast the world is." Annalisse folds her arms in front of her chest.
Eleazar, stepping away from his mate, stares at the two men he had worked with decades prior. "Felix. Demetri. This is not a hill you want to die on."
Appalled at the idea of defeat, Felix turns on Eleazar. "And what do you plan on doing with us if we refuse to take your demands to Aro? Are you really willing to kill us? The others will find out sooner or later. All of you will never be safe if you kill us. No matter how many other misfits you find, the Volturi will always have more members."
"We can rationally discuss this. There need not be casualties, Felix." Carlisle's tone was almost pleading. The good doctor despised violence unless it was absolutely necessary. And for his family, he would do anything to keep them safe.
Felix keeps his stare red against gold. "You know what happens to covens that try to defy us. Regardless, if Aro ends up agreeing to your demands, he'll never forgive you."
That was true.
Not having to read your mind to know you were anxious, you feel the tentative brush of Edward's fingers against your hand. You melt, your fingers weaving between his.
Annalisse's hum turns heads as she squeezes her way to an abandoned corner of the room. "Dieufel, this is your tool kit, yes?"
Still monitoring Irina, Dieufel momentarily lifts his head. "Yes, SeĂąora."
"Evita, come here and help me."
Wordlessly, Evita obeys her mother and follows her to the corner.
Demetri positions himself for an attack. "What is she doing?"
You didn't even know what Annalisse had planned up her sleeve. Witches were unpredictable. The older woman was walking around the living room so nonchalant like she owned the place, humming as she came back to her previous position.
"Nadege, mija, can you get me samples from those two?" Annalisse doesn't even look at them, simply waving her hand in their general direction.
Felix and Demetri start to back up, wanting to get as far away from the witch as possible. They could smell the magic pumping in her very veins instead of blood. For a moment, Felix darts his eyes to the window in contemplation. The closest to the window were Rosalie and Esme. But even from where you stood, you could make out several familiar fuzzy shapes in the front yard. Your pack was waiting for the moment to tear them to shreds.
Seeming to understand Annalisse's intent, Nadege morphs into her hawk form, and with talons ready, she dives at Demetri first. Her talons dig in and rip a generous amount of hair from atop his head, causing the Volturi guard to yowl from the sharp pain blazing across his scalp. He lunges for her bird-form, but she's faster and is already on Felix's path. Emmett and Jasper subdue them so they don't interfere with Annalisse's spellwork. Eleazar, Carmen, Kate, and Tanya close in on them, forming a guard to prevent them from slipping out. They have no other allies but each other and are dramatically outnumbered.
All they could do was watch in frozen horror as Nadege dropped their hair into the older witch's hand.
It's tricky to decipher what ingredients she has in the small stone mortar. With your enhanced smelling capabilities, you can at least make out what smelled like an incredibly hot pepper. Nose wrinkly at the intense scent, you even feel Edward recoil slightly. Of the vampires in the room, while many could resist the stench by merely turning their heads away, some lifted their hands to shield their noses. Felix and Demetri nearly leap at Annalisse when she starts to advance toward them with her concoction in hand. Her free hand, being her left, waves over the top. Her lips were moving, but no words were coming out, yet they produced a reaction from her mortar. The contents hiss as a small trickle of smoke rises. That thin, gray line grows longer and longer until it seems to have a life of its own and strikes out at the Volturi members like a snake.
There's a split in its sleek body as two heads, each spitting vaporous venom that lands on them. More durable than the hardiest of diamonds, the skin starts sizzling where the venom spatters. This affected Demetri the most as he tried to shield Felix from the brunt of the attack. Doing little to protect Felix, even the drops that land on him, have a massive effect.
"WITCH!" Felix howls in anguish as a spray of venom finds a place on his face. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"
Even the Denali members that had been standing behind them recoil in ashen dread. Carmen's hand goes up to her neck, and she has an anxious manner about what she is seeing. Tanya and Kate hover over Irina in a protective stance in case Annalisse's magic spreads to their unconscious sister. The power of witches proved to be truly terrifying. Never before had she seen a Volturi member so vulnerable at the hands of a human. Bella watches with morbid curiosity. She could potentially possess this type of power if she studied her craft hard.
"Ego is your venom," explains Annalisse, her eyes hooded as she regards the screaming vampires as they clutch the burns on their body. "Ego will be the Volturi's downfall. This curse will be a reminder of that. Anytime you desire to harm, the venom will rise to your skin and burn. Imagine what a handful of witches can do with this curse toward your coven."
Through his pain, Demetri seethes, "Are you threatening us?"
"No, it's a promise. You do not want to incur a witch's wrath. Nor would your coven. There are thousands of us out there in the world. Perhaps the next human victim you bring will be a witch and you would never even know until it was too late."
That statement alone sends shivers throughout the living room. Everyone was witness to the power that these outward-appearing mortals could have. Even Evita, who still had much to learn, could wield her magic effortlessly.
The smoke snakes dissipate, leaving Demetri and Felix panting for air they did not require. Their faces were gaunt, not used to experiencing such levels of pain. Scorch marks left on their skin from the curse slowly disappear until no sign remains of the wound incurred by Annalisse.
"We don't want any bloodshed." Carlisle quietly reminds them. "But we will fight back to protect our family. Witches and wolves alike."
There's an ominous howl outside, first a lone echo before the others join in. Piercing, primal, and impossibly loud. Behind Esme and Rosalie, the windowpanes tremble not from the wind but from the force of the sound itself.
Palpable hate radiates from Felix's face, his sharp white teeth baring, wanting nothing more than to sink them into Annalisse. They had only one choice but to concede defeat among so many enemies.
Shame fills his motions as Felix hangs his head. "What are we to say to Aro? You know he won't take this news well."
"Tell him whatever you need to to convince him that no action should be taken against us. Whether that be the truth or something else is up to you. But we'll be ready as a whole if Aro decides to exact his wrath." Eleazar stands by Carlisle. Having lived under the Volturi's roof for several decades, they knew what could happen.
Slowly, Felix's gaze shifts around the room. The coven presented to them was a conglomerate of vampires, wolves, and witches. All bearing down on them with unforgiving eyes. They could potentially prove to be the strongest coven in the world. The Volturi would be in big trouble if other vampire covens followed suit.
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As Demetri and Felix leave the Cullen estate, your pack follows them until they're assured that both are out of the state of Washington. Waiting for an hour to make sure that they would not attempt re-entry.
You sat on the porch, gazing into the forest, feeling your pack near as they returned to their territory. The sun was slowly descending behind the tops of the trees, casting an orange hue over the sky.
So much anxiety over the past few months that you now find yourself exhausted as you lean your head against the porch's rails. Everything was finally settling in as the world calmed to a quiet lull, except for Annalisse scolding her daughter for all the stress she put her through. Evita takes the verbal abuse like a champ, quietly apologizing for running away. After all was said and done, Annalisse gathered Evita in her arms for a tight embrace. Ultimately, she missed her daughter terribly and didn't want to lose another daughter. You catch Jacob lingering a few feet away from the mother-daughter duo.
Footsteps behind you, you turn your head slightly and smile up at Edward. He takes up the spot next to you. "Do you think he'll tell her?"
"Probably. It might be his last chance to before they head back to Puerto Rico." You muse, enjoying how close he was to you. It felt natural.
Like that was how the two of you have always been.
"And Leah?"
You unintentionally groan. "That's a different story. I think she's still fighting against the imprinting."
His hand tentatively seeks you out again. You smile to yourself and close the distance. Edward grins. "Speaking of. . . we still have our first date to do."
Butterflies flurry in your tummy at the thought; Edward hears the rapid pickup of your heart and chuckles to himself. "Yes!" You squeeze his hand in your's and swear you could see pink dusting his cheeks.
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"We will stay the night but go home in the morning." Annalisse huffs, pivoting on her heels to head back inside the Cullen house but stops midstep to smile softly at the scene before her. A vampire and a werewolf. Who would have thought.
They may look odd together, but their smiles are enough to scream out the sheer happiness that the two are experiencing.
Evita tracks her mom's gaze and smiles. "It's odd, isn't it, mama?" She'd become fast friends with the wolf pack and the Cullens and witnessed firsthand the anguish you went through from imprinting on a vampire.
"In a beautiful way." She agrees. Giving the top of her daughter's head a quick kiss, she excuses herself to hesitantly interrupt the happy couple so that she may reenter the house.
Evita watches as you and Edward make room for Annalisse to walk up the front steps and onto the porch. Both returned to their previous sitting arrangement. So close together that their arms were pressed against each other. You're a dark contrast compared to Edward.
When Evita notices Jacob standing nearby, she smiles. "Oh, hello, Jacob."
He towers over her, massive not just in height but muscle, too. Hard to remember that Jacob was still a teenager, much like herself. "Hey. . . You guys leaving?"
"Not until tomorrow. That curse took a lot of energy out of my mom. She's tired and needs rest." Evita hums. "I think we'll all sleep well tonight. Well, except for the vampires since they don't sleep at all."
"Can't say the same about Sam. He'll probably supervise the wards all night and ensure Felix and Demetri don't come back." Jacob felt like he could sleep for a straight month. But he couldn't go home until he told Evita. Sam gave him the green light to reveal the imprinting to her.
Evita has to crane her neck to look at him. "He's a good leader, your Sam."
Was the imprinting that made Evita look so beautiful in the orange filter of the lowering sun? Her freckles appeared perfectly scattered across the bridge of her nose before they fanned out across her cheeks. Even the scars on her face didn't deter from her loveliness. Jacob simply didn't know. Maybe he'd ask you later.
"I imprinted on you." He hurriedly spits out.
Her smile falls a bit out of confusion. "What was that?"
Gulping, Jacob nervously rubs the back of his neck before meeting her eyes again. "I imprinted on you. The first time I saw you in Sam's driveway. . ."
Dark green eyes widen in surprise. "Really?" Imprinting, as she'd learned, was incredibly important to the shapeshifters. She'd seen Sam and Emily and you and Edward. A sacred connection that tied two beings together.
She takes a step back to assess Jacob fully. Jacob stiffens slightly but awaits her reaction. He can't read her face as Evita keeps her expression neutral in thought.
"So. . . we're soulmates?" asks Evita. Taking a quick look over where Edward is now standing on the steps, holding his hand out to you to help you up. You're practically beaming with a love aura when you take his hand and let him pull you to your feet. Eyes of the deepest green return to Jacob's face.
He nods his head shyly. "I'm sorry. . ."
A short laugh is exhaled from her. "Sorry for what?"
"Imprinting on you. You didn't ask for this. You just came here to help us." Jacob knows he's rambling but can't do anything about the fluid stream that continues to run forth. He just has to make sure Evita doesn't hate his guts.
"Hey, it's okay." Her fingers were warm to the touch when she pressed them against his forearm. "You don't have a choice in it. I. . . feel a little honored, actually. It's supposed to be a good thing, right? When you find your imprintee, it means you've found the best person for you and the pack."
He's staring at her with such awe. "I'm not asking for anything more than to get to know you. We can go from there. If that's okay. I mean- if you're even slightly interested in me."
She's laughing again. "It would be stupid of me to pass up such a cute, sweet guy like you."
Jacob felt like he could fly. "Yeah?" He curses the tremble in his voice, which reveals how relieved he was to hear that.
"That is if you don't mind the long-distance thing."
Smiling, Jacob vociferously nods his head. "I can do that."
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Sam's cabin was bursting at the seams, a wild party being held as a celebration of sorts. Many were sitting on the cabin's front porch, chatting without worrying about stray vamps invading Forks. Some, like Leah, were gathered around the firepit in Sam's backyard. The kitchen door that led out to the backyard was wide open so others could easily travel about. Leah makes out the figures of Alice, Esme, and Annalisse in the kitchen. Though she couldn't be seen, Leah could hear Carmen's loud laugh.
Around the fire, Bella is shown a quick-fire trick by Nadege and Evita (whom she notices sitting incredibly close to a goofy-looking Jacob). Colored her impressed, Bella wasn't as useless as Leah first assumed. Dare she even observe that Bella's smile was blindingly bright. The younger wolves crowd around Nadege. Still, love-sick pups swoon over her as she completely ignores them. Rosalie and Kate watch and are thoroughly hooked on Nadege's little show.
Leah could even hear Seth's voice, which was far away. He was laughing- a sound she hadn't heard since their father died. Smiling to herself, Leah returns to sipping her soda and focuses on what Nadege will do next.
That is until Dieufel quietly sits next to her. She tenses up, refusing to acknowledge how her entire being reacted to his mere presence.
He's smoking something that she can't quite decipher but it has her nose twitching at the soothing smell.
Dieufel unlatches his lips from the end of his cigarette and exhales a long stream of smoke that reminds her of Annalisse's cursed snakes. "I don't think we've been properly introduced." He calmly says, catching her entirely off guard. "Dieufel."
Her mouth feels uncomfortably dry. "I know."
"And you're Leah Clearwater." Damn, his charming smirk and damn imprinting. Leah's grip becomes tighter on her soda can. It slowly crunched and folded underneath her grasp. She can't look at him. He'd easily see right through her and know her dirty secret.
Remaining silent, Leah chooses to focus on Seth, who is on the other side of Bella; when had he wandered over? He's smiling and says something to the witch-in-training. Bella smiles over her shoulder at the younger Clearwater sibling.
That only seems to make him smile. "I've heard you're a hard one."
"Excuse me?" She abruptly snaps at him. He doesn't react. Simply amused by her.
"That's alright. I'm a patient man."
Her temper gets the best of her as she shoots to her feet, attracting the attention of others. "Just what the hell are you saying?!"
He stares at the others before they avert their gaze. Wise decision. Many had just witnessed hours ago how Dieufel incapacitated a vampire so easily.
A burn flashes across her cheeks as she storms past the backyard's perimeter and into the woods. Anything to get away from the situation before her. Only the sound of footsteps followed after her as she stopped dead in her tracks.
"What do you want from me?" She hisses, a defensive stance squaring her shoulders and preparing her for a fight. The only fight she was really worried about was the one going on inside of her. Every cell screamed at her to get closer to Dieufel, touch him, and inhale his scent.
Dieufel sighs and stomps out his cigarette. "I know about your imprinting. I've known far before arriving in Forks."
A raging blush consumes the entirety of her face as Leah clenches down on her back molars. "This whole time. . . you knew-" She cuts herself off.
He holds up his hands in a calming manner. "I figured you'd talk to me about it after the situation with the Volturi was dealt with. But it seems you plan to ignore it."
"Exactly. What's the point in talking about it anyway? You'll be going back home anyway."
"I don't have to go home anytime soon." Dieufel counters slyly, taking her by surprise. "I can stay here for a little bit longer. Only if you want me to."
"Why would I want you to stay here?" Part of Leah loathes how curt she was being toward him. It was her only sense of defense from what she was feeling. Dieufel was acting far too casually about the whole thing as if he'd accepted that he was her destined mate. "More importantly, why would you want to stay? You should be running back to wherever you're from!"
Walking up to her, Dieufel puts his hands in his pockets and cocks his head to one side. "I'm not scared of what Fate deems my path."
"Fate." Leah derisively snorts. "So you'll let Fate take away your freedom of choosing your partner? You're okay with that? Being tied to a complete stranger for the rest of your life? You have no idea what imprinting really entails, too. The pain that goes into it."
She could feel the sting of tears gathering on her lower lashes. Leah damns them and everything about being a wolf. Mentally, she's brought back to the day when Sam first became a wolf. How exciting it was. Until her cousin Emily came to Forks, everything went up in flames. Leah had lost everything and continued losing everything.
Now, her being a wolf was causing someone else to lose their freedom of choice.
"When I was little, I lived for being in the sky. Nothing was better than the freedom of taking to the air in my bird form. But I looked forward to sleep most of all as it took me to the most beautiful forest. I was still in bird form in those dreams but didn't want to leave the mossy forest floor. I always looked for a small, gray wolf that weaved through the trees." His voice is tender. "I don't think of this as my freedom being taken away from me, Leah. Nothing can do that if I view it as another adventure. I will push forward with this adventure, but only if you are. I won't stay where I'm not wanted. But I would stay for you. To get to know the woman I've been dreaming of since childhood."
Leah's hands are trembling from his words. She'd turned away from him when she felt the tears' betrayal. "You won't like me when you get to know me. There's nothing likable about me."
"I'd beg to differ. Your brother has nothing but good things to say about you. The younger wolves admire you for being strong despite your size. Even Sam-"
"Don't talk about him." Her tone was losing its original venom as she was emotionally tired out.
"Let me decide whether or not I'll like you once I get to know you." Dieufel insists.
"And if you don't? What if I do get attached to you, and then you decide you don't like the person I am? What then?"
"Do you intend to let this worry stop you from taking a risk?" Dieufel counters. "Will you continue to live in fear of the unknown?"
"I'm not afraid."
Goading her on, Dieufel grins. "Then prove it."
Huffing in indignation, Leah throws up her hands. "Fine then. Stay if you want. I don't care." She walks around Dieufel, ignoring how his smirk makes her heart skip a beat.
He follows her back to Sam's house, the atmosphere lighter around the two as Leah grudgingly tolerates his close presence. "I can tell you're going to be fun."
"Shut up."
"As my mate commands."
"Don't call me that! We're not mates yet."
"Yet?"
". . . God, you're annoying."
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You and Edward left Sam's fairly early in the night. Walking hand in hand without a real destination.
Winding up at the shores of La Push's beach, the two of you make a cozy spot on the sand. He'd never been on the rez's beach. Being over 100 years old, Edward was still surprised by how many firsts he was experiencing this late in his life. For once, he was excited about his eternal life. Especially experiencing life with you.
There was still worry about the Volturi's wrath, but with everyone banded together, that fear was lessened to something that would be dealt with in the future. Together.
"If I drive, we can make it to Seattle in an hour. I read about a botanical garden that is highly rated." Edward was buzzing with date ideas.
"Ooh, that sounds perfect! They also have an art museum. I've only been there once, when I was little. I've always wanted to go back." You catch Edward staring at you. "W-What?"
Tentatively, he reaches up to caress the side of your cheek that had the scar given to you by the lechuza. You unashamedly lean into it. You weren't expecting Edward to lean forward and place the softest kiss on your lips.
When you gasp, he immediately pulls away. "I'm sorry. I should've asked. We haven't even been on a first date, and here I am-"
"Edward, it's okay. I think we're past any normal dating rules." You giggle, and emboldened by his kiss, you beckon his face back toward you to return the favor. He melts against you.
Nothing could take away this moment from you.
Finally, the song of your heart that Edward fell in love with was no longer a sad melody but one of uplifting joy. Edward vows that he'll keep your heart singing that tune for the rest of his life.
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Thank you everyone for sticking around till the end :) I know I could have continued this, drawn it out longer, but i've been working on this for years. I suck at story endings so very sorry if the ending is anticlimatctic. Also sorry for taking forever with the ending of this.
If i get the itch to come back to this story maybe i'll do like a epilogue chapter of something like that.
TAGLIST: @saltedcoffeescotch​  , @dangerouslittlefairy​ , @burn-crash-rqmance​ , @casedoina , @avadakadabra93 , @daryldixonstorm , @blue-aconite​ , @xanniestired666 , @esposadomd​, @godinho11​ , @alexizodd​ , @melaninsugarbaby​ , @lyeatoalinatoheaven , @ronwownsme​ , @itsmytimetoodream​ , @afro-hispwriter​ , @mutandis-extremis993 , @hxgemxscles​ , @nightly-polaris​ , @corrodedcoffin-slut , @ellesalazar​ , @itgetzweird08​ , @crybabyatthediscooffandoms​ , @sassyandclassyx​ , @scarlet2007​ , @theroyalbrownbarbie​ , @jennyamanda8​ , @stevenandmarcslove​ , @biancaindaeyo​ , @loversjoy​ , @turningtoclown​ , @vixorell​ , @xxthackerybinxxx , @daredevilonmyheels​ , @dumbbitch-juicee​ , @southern-bell-give-hell , @nat-the-gemini , @imdoingathingmom​ , @emmettcullenswife , @yoong1c0re , @daddykylokenobi​ , @minjix​ , @magical-spit​ , @krismdavis​ , @arin-swear-rose
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edupunkn00b ¡ 3 days ago
Text
Ribbit
In the aftermath of frogging out after the Lee and Mary Lee's wedding, Patton feels like he owes everyone an apology. Mostly because he does. But before that, he and Thomas still have some things to work out. Rated G - WC: 2728 - Written for @tsspromptmonth's Sleepy Bean Fanfic CafĂŠ for the great @dndeceit.
It's okay, Patton. I know you'll do anything you can to make things right.
Patton blinked away the sight of 8-bit Thomas sprawled unconscious on the floor, Janus shielding him with his own body. He swallowed back a quiet ribbit and tried to smile. Thomas was shaken but standing. Unharmed.
Well, physically, at least. "Thanks for trusting me still, Kiddo. I'm…" Unnaturally quiet, the room screamed with the Princely Side's absence and though he'd sought out the solace of his own room, Roman's pain remained, pulling at Patton's chest with icy claws. If anything, the privacy of his own room allowed him to let slip his hero's mask and his cries reached out to him through the Mindscape. "I'm gonna go check on Roman." And try to tell him how sorry he was.
He tugged the sleeves of his catigan, eyes darting automatically to the floor where Logan's spot was currently filled with Janus' carefully polished shoes. How was he ever going to apologize to Logan?
"Before you go..." Thomas' voice pulled him back and Patton looked up. Did he want him to stay? "I think I understand now what it means... Deceit being here as a part of me.
"Oh." Glancing at Janus, Patton fought to keep his smile. "Yeah?"
Janus' hurt crackled through the air, seizing Patton's heart. "Oh, yeah, that's cool…" he muttered flippantly, adjusting his gloves. Despite the thick layer of sarcasm, Janus' pain stole his breath and the Protective Side avoided both his and Thomas' eyes. "Talk about me like I'm not here."
Thomas didn't seem to notice. "...It's not that I'm an evil liar or even a fractionally fiendish fibber. Everyone has a capacity for deceit, including me. And all that means is... I'm not perfect. Just like anyone else."
Patton nodded. "And those imperfections..." He started to reach him but the back of his hand was covered in bright green splotches and he yanked it back before Thomas could spot them. Janus, however, did. "Those imperfections don't make us any less worthy of love." Throat tight with panic, Patton managed to croak out, "Janus?"
He had to get out of there before he got worse.
"I'll take care of him," Janus murmured, tilting his face to show more of his scales. If anyone would understand, it was him.
Nodding his thanks, Patton sank out and stood in the Mindscape hallway. All the doors were closed, with only a thin light spilling up onto the floor from the stairwell nightlight. The gap under his own door was dark, its usual honeyed glow dimmed. He reached for the doorknob, the cold metal impossibly small in his grip. Patton flipped both hands over. The skin between his fingers had stretched up to his middle knuckles, thin and growing a near-transluscent green. He touched his door and it warmed against his skin, the light beneath growing, inviting him in to huddle under the covers with a mug of hot cocoa and his stuffies and just forget this awful day.
"Oh, Roman, thank god you don't have a mustache." Janus' pain sizzled, scalding Patton's skin and he took a half step back, nearly bumping into Thomas' blinds. "Otherwise, between you and Remus, I wouldn't know who the evil twin is." Patton didn't know where to look. When neither of them leapt to his defense, Roman's heart screamed for him, begging Morality to banish Deceit back to the shadows. But Thomas… Thomas shared Janus' hurt. He stared at Roman, shocked that his Princely Side would stoop so low as to insult another of his Side's name. Again. Roman's hurt turned to outrage. "Are you guys seriously going to take his side?" "N-No, I—" "Over me?" "Wh- he-" Patton drowned on Roman's tears. "Thomas... I thought I was your hero..." "Y-" His eyes flicked over to Janus. "You are!" The Protective Side had long ago given up hope of becoming Thomas' hero and even he couldn't hide how much that hurt. Not from Patton, at least. But this was no time for sarcasm and both he and Patton knew it. Eyes downcast, he nodded at Roman, confirming Thomas spoke no lies. "Huh." So ready to believe the worst from him, he couldn't hear Janus' honesty. "Wow. I can't believe this. Did you forget that he's evil?!—" 'If I'm evil, then so is Thomas…'
Patton really needed check on him first. Tugging at his too-tight collar, he turned to Roman's room.
The ache in his chest deepened the closer he got to the gilded red door and he heard Roman's crying before he could even knock. "Ro? Kiddo? Can I come in?" Patton called through the door.
Virgil answered and stood in the doorway. Patton peered past him, just making out Roman's boots tossed haphazardly on the floor, the Princely Side curled on the bed, back to him. Frowning up at Patton, Virgil shook his head and wordlessly closed the door.
"Yeah, um…" Patton said to the red lacquered wood. "Maybe later?" he added, hope cracking in his voice. Just in case Roman changed his mind, he stood shivering in the hall an unreasonably long time. Eventually, the Prince's tears quieted and the flickering glow of the television flitted under the door. Nodding, Patton stepped back. Virgil had him.
Logan's door stood a few steps away. Rubbing the back of his neck, he made his way over. The silver constellations carved and painted into the dark navy wood had lost a bit of their sheen but the splintered edges had recently begun to stitch themselves back together and the heavy pewter door knocker had been recently polished.
Hand outstretched to knock, Patton noticed the blooming green splotches all over the back of his hand and arms and he yanked his catigan from his shoulders. He squeezed into it, the material stretching to its limit to fit around his suddenly broader shoulders, thumbs tucked into their little holes the only thing keeping the sleeves from riding up and revealing his now completely green arms. He pulled the hood up, tugging at it to try to cover where his hair had dissolved into smooth green flesh.
It didn't quite fit, but it was better. Maybe. He hoped.
Patton knocked and the door quickly opened.
Remus glared up at him, one hand on the door, the other still clutching a roll of gauze. Neck half-bandaged, Logan sat on the edge of his bed. He turned away when he saw who was at the door. 
"I thought…" Patton stepped closer, reaching for Logan without thinking but Remus held his ground, jaw tight. Patton stepped back, fingers twisting together. "Sorry," he mumbled. "But I thought we couldn't be harmed by things with no real-world impact. I… Janus' crook is…"
"A metaphor?" Logan finished from his spot on the bed. He still wouldn't look in Patton's direction.
"Well…" Patton shrugged, his catigan growing tighter as Logan's room got just that much smaller. "Yeah."
Rolling his eyes, Remus returned to Logan's side. "Skipping Thomas' logical contributions happened in real-life, Daddy Frog Legs." He moved to reveal the bright red and blue bruising along Logan's jaw. "There's your impact."
"Oh," Patton whispered, stumbling backwards over too-large feet. He ended up in the hallway, once again facing Remus. He tugged his catigan hem down over his belly, hearing the stitches stretch and pop.
With a dismissive wave of his hand, Remus turned and closed the door. As it clicked shut, Patton's clothes grew, once again falling comfortably over his cartoonishly large frame. "Um, thank you," he called back and tucked both hands into the big front pocket, shivering in the empty hallway.
Moving further down the hall, Patton hurried past Lucas' room, the rusty orange paint cracked and peeling. The door rattled but he ignored it. He couldn't even hear it. Nope, couldn't hear any—
"Isn't denial my job, Morality?" Janus murmured from the top of the stairs.
Patton hopped in surprise and whipped around. Janus stood, relaxed, leaning with one elbow resting on the railing. A feigned casualness belied by eyes that never left his. "Shouldn't someone be with Thomas?" he asked, eyes swiveling to Roman and Logan's doors.
Janus nodded slowly. "Yes. He's asked for you. Besides…" Golden eyes darted over to Logan's door. "I have some apologies of my own to make."
"You mean for impersonating Logan again?"
Face a stiff mask, Janus waved his hand in a failed distraction from the guilt sizzling between them. "That, and…"
The Sides' hurt from Janus' dig about the 'evil twin' clawed at Patton's throat. Roman's outrage. Janus' pained contrition. And, softer, but just as caustic, the sharp stab from Remus when he heard. By the time Patton caught his breath, Janus had already slipped into Logan's room, the lock clicking quietly into place. Alone again, Patton felt Thomas' call and he sank down, emerging in Thomas' bedroom.
Well, the hall just outside Thomas' bedroom. Door open wide, soft warm light spilled out into the hallway. Patton tapped the door frame. "Knock, knock," he asked more than said. "Can I come in, Tomathy?"
Wrapped in a plush flannel blanket, Thomas sat curled in the big armchair next to the window. A steaming mug of hot chocolate, a tall glass of fizzy water, and a Switch paused on the Splatoon loading screen crowded his nightstand. His phone was turned off and set on the charger, along with his watch. "Janus has really been taking good care of you, huh, Kiddo?"
Guilt washed over Thomas' features and he eyed his phone. He started to rise, the blanket falling to the floor. "I should turn it back on, shouldn't I? Quil was working on their portfolio and they might need help. I haven't heard from Joan in a while either—"
Patton led him back to his seat and pressed the mug of hot chocolate into his hands. "No, Kiddo, no! That's not what I meant. It's… It's good." He pressed a smile onto his face and hid his green fingers back into his catigan pocket. "It's good he's taking care of you—that you're taking care of you. I… I'm glad." Stepping back, he swallowed against the lump in his throat, lips pressed hard against the  weird little clicking ribbit pushing up. "I'm glad he could take care of you when I couldn't. To… to protect you. Y'know…" His tongue felt too large for his mouth. "Protect you from me."
Thomas set down the mug and really looked up at him. His eyes fell over his hulking shoulders and the way his knees bounced even as he stood still. "Pat?" he asked and scooted over in his seat. "C'mere, buddy."
Eyeing the cozy spot next to him, Patton shook his head and perched on the side of Thomas' bed instead. He pretended he couldn't see the hurt in Thomas' big puppy dog eyes. Fingers curled under his palms, he folded his hands in his lap. "Dee—Janus said you asked for me," he said after a while.
Thomas nodded and folded his legs up in the chair, knees hugged close to his body. "Yeah, Pat… We… we should talk."
Lips pressed together, Patton nodded. When he noticed Thomas watching him, he painted on a bright grin. "Sure thing, Kiddo."
"Pat?" Thomas reached for his hand, smiling when Patton tentatively reached back and folded his sleeve-covered hand over his. "Pat, I think we're past pretending nothing happened back there."
Patton started to shrink back but Thomas held tight to his hand. "You… You're right." Mouthing opening and closing, faint wordless popping sounds the only noise he could make. Patton nodded again and sucked in a deep breath.
"Take your time, Buddy," Thomas finally said. "I'm not really sure where to start apologizing, either." He hung his head, shoulders hunched and tight as he avoided Patton's gaze.
Patton shifted, scrunching his socks with long, webbed toes. He drew in another shaky breath, watching Thomas do the same. Guilt churned in his guts and he let go of Thomas' hand to wrap both arms over his belly, hugging himself.
Thomas copied his action.
"Hey, Kiddo…" Patton began and Thomas' head jerked up, eyes wide. Scared.
"Yeah, Pat?"
"Ki—Thomas," Patton tried again, inhaling slowly, Virgil's voice counting their breaths echoing through his memory. "I'm feeling really guilty for what I did to you." He spoke as plainly as he could, Janus' cryptic nod and Romain's despairing sink out of the living room playing on a loop through his mind. "You don't need to feel guilty."
"It's kinda hard not to, Pat," Thomas shrugged, still not quite meeting his gaze. "You're at the core of a lot of my feelings, right?"
Nodding, Patton silently counted to four as he inhaled.
"I think it goes both ways for us."
Recalling all the nights he'd spent comforting Virgil or Thomas after a nightmare—or after a real-life disaster—Patton slowly nodded again. "Maybe it would help if…" Patton had no clue if his idea would even work or if it would just make Thomas feel even worse. Logan would know. Eyes flicking over to the corner spot next to Logan's bedroom spot in front of Thomas' framed degree, he shuddered. How many more times would Logan forgive him? How many more times would he need Logan to forgive him?
Sour guilt flooded his chest, rising up into a very clear, very loud "Riiiiib—bit!"
Thomas had curled into himself, eyes faraway. "Kiddo, let's try something different."
The hand that reached for him was a little less green than it had been when he'd first arrived at Thomas' door and he threaded their fingers together. With a gentle tug, he pulled Thomas up to his feet and wrapped both arms around him. After a long moment, Thomas hugged him back, face buried in the thick fleece catigan. He'd gotten closer to his regular size but still the top of Thomas' head barely grazed his shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Thomas," he whispered, voice catching in his throat. "I'm sorry for everything."
"It's okay, I—" Muffled by his shoulder, Thomas' sob broke free and he gripped Patton tighter. "I just want—I want…" Patton rubbed his back as he shook with another sob. "I want to make you proud."
Pushing down another awful ribbet, Patton whispered. "Oh, Kiddo, you do!"
Shaking with relief—and exhaustion—Thomas leaned against him and Patton stood tall, lips pressed tightly together. But then Thomas hugged him tighter and the words spilled out. "It's all I want, too."
To his own ears, Patton's voice burst out in a croak but Thomas didn't seem to mind. He only hugged him closer and nodded. "You do, Pat, all the time."
With that, the dam broke and his own tears rushed out, wetting Thomas' hair and his own arms and hands. His green splotches faded under each drop, and the guilt clawing up his throat softened, spilling out with his tears. Soon, both their tears had soaked through the catigan, turning the light grey a mottled charcoal. Patton pulled back, letting out a choked laugh when he realized he once again stood eye-to-eye with Thomas.
"Maybe I don't need this right now?" Swimming in the soggy fleece, Patton needed Thomas' help to disentangle himself. Working carefully, they peeled away the heavy fleece and gently laid it at the foot of the bed to dry. Back in short sleeves, Patton shivered, but not a speck of green was to be seen.
"C'mon, Pat." Thomas smiled and pulled him over to the arm chair before covering both of them with his blanket. "Let's warm up," he said, lifting his hot chocolate. A similar mug this one in bright green on a red saucer, sat behind it. "Hey, look—" Thomas passed him the steaming mug. "I think this one's for you."
Wordlessly accepting the cup, Patton marveled at the twins' colors, the buzz of their creative magic familiar and welcome against his fingers, comfortably warm in his hands. He peered into the cup, a smile tugging at his lips when the ripples in the cup briefly spelled out, Please sleep soon. Nodding his assent, he sniffed the steam. Rich and chocolatey, he picked up a bit of peppermint and vanilla. It smelled good. It smelled right.
"Cheers?" Thomas asked, raising his cup.
Smiling back at him, Patton clinked their cups together. "Cheers."
18 notes ¡ View notes
citrus-moonlight ¡ 2 days ago
Text
Tara, I love this chapter so much!!! The way that you manage to create such a tangible desire between the two of them even though she doesn't even know what he looks like (and as far as she knows hasn't met him yet 😏) is incredible.
Reader being able to have a different type of release first when she blocks her mother's number was so satisfying. I love how she's finally able to let go of that part of her as she realizes that it isn't worth it anymore, that she is worth so much more than someone who didn't and doesn't want her, now that she knows what it's like to have someone who does.
"You smile at your phone. Your eyes are watery, your cheeks are warm, and your lips are lopsided and trembling. You can blame all of that on the wine, but the way your heart is battering against your ribcage? You've got it bad for some words on a screen, a hand, a pair of shoes, and a ghost."
I love how gone she already is, how everything is building so intensely and she doesn't even know what he looks like yet. And then when she finally lets herself go to the thought of him, and the realization that the relief barely lasts because now the floodgates are open and she only wants more?? LORD. The tension is so good, and I love how delicious it feels as he metes out little details in pictures and words and how they're all so precious to her as she tries to form a picture in her head to focus her desire on (and I am forever screaming at "I'm not going to describe my cock to you" 😂).
"Well then. I'll keep that in mind. I really liked the maroon silk one, personally. I bet it would feel nice on my skin." >I agree, it would feel very nice on your skin.
Good lord, that man is so smooth. And I am also enjoying that she picks out a maroon one (because now I am thinking about that silk robe, and how they would go so well together 😏).
You're done hesitating. Of course you are. But when you take that step, it's going to be on your terms. You know, instinctively, that you should never give up too much power to him. Both because it would be so easy to lose yourself in him—which you don't want to do now that you've finally found yourself—and because he would delight in never giving it back.
The duality that of him that you show is so good, how he swings from >I could have you however I wanted, couldn't I? to the vulnerability admitting that he wants her to touch his face, the "but I think I will if you do it." I love that contrast between the predatory part of him, the part that's truly so dangerous (and yet so intriguing), but then you continue to show how needy he is underneath that, something he's trying to hide under his own mask (he's so pathetic and touch starved, I need him).
And then of course the smut is always so incredible, the way he talks I am just 🥵🫠😵‍💫. The >Only me. Only I can see you like this and >That's right. I'm going to make you sob my name. He's so possessive and demanding I'm going to lose it.
>It's all I've been able to think about for months. It's going to feel so fucking good to finally get to fuck you and come with my cock buried inside of you. And I'm going to do it over and over again until I physically can't anymore. >Do you understand? I NEED you. Fuck!
Ok, knowing it's speech to text makes this is so fucking hot, imagining how desperate his voice must sound, and then THE FUCKING PICTURE?? EXCUSE ME???? And her almost tipping and that feeling of freefall adding to everything when she comes, oh my god that was such a perfect parallel to this whole experience with him, LIKE JESUS CHRIST TARA THIS IS SO GOOD.
Seriously, I am always beside myself when I come back to this chapter, your dialogue and all of the interactions are always so dynamic even when their just talking and exploring. I am so excited to see where things are going to develop and evolve once she finally meets him! (truly I am gnawing on the walls, your slow burns are always so amazing, it drives me crazy and I love every minute of it!) 💖
Seriously, I am always beside myself when I come back to this chapter, your dialogue and all of the interactions are always so dynamic even when they're just talking and exploring. I am so excited to see where things are going to develop and evolve once she finally meets him! Truly I am gnawing on the walls, the way you write and and slowly ratchet up the need and tension is always so mind meltingly good, that slow burn drives me crazy and I love every minute of it! 💖💖💖
The Devil Makes Us Sin
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Fandom: Luther, Luther: The Fallen Sun
Pairing: David Robey/F!Reader
Chapter 4/? (12.8k words)
->start at chapter 1<-
<- Chapter 3
AO3 Link
Summary: Your life isn't perfect, and you don't enjoy moonlighting as a camgirl for so many repulsive men, but you need the money and it's yours. You're getting by just fine. You're content.
At least you thought you were. Then you get a strange text message. And you aren't sure if you're horrified or intrigued.
Warnings: Explicit rating, smut, stalking, spying, blackmail, manipulation, dubcon, dubious consent, Dom/sub, sadism, masochism, unprotected sex, oral sex, masturbation, mutual masturbation, choking, dirty talk, praise, humiliation, possessive love, yandere, minor description of gore, minor description of violence, murder, discussion of murder, shame involving sex work, light shaming of sex work, emotionally abusive mother, troubled mother/daughter relationship, sexual harassment, workplace sexual harassment, alcohol consumption, religious trauma
A/N: To all of my fellow readers with mother issues, this chapter is for us 💖 Because those troubled mother/daughter relationship and emotionally abusive mother tags hit real hard this chapter (I'm not projecting, you're projecting). But I eventually make it up to you, I promise. (As a reminder from my notes last chapter, David uses voice to text when they're chatting 😏) Also, I changed the formatting for texting conversations because eventually there will be texting while there is external dialogue, and I don't want it to be confusing. So his texts continue to be in italics and Reader's are in italics AND quotes.
Work title is from "Paradise Circus" by Massive Attack. Chapter title is from Tanaka Mhishi's poem in Literary Sexts II. Text divider 1 is from Francisco de Goya's Witches Flight. Text divider 2 is from Caravaggio's Sacrifice of Isaac.
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Chapter 4 - I am fragile and unholy. Open. Ravage. Eat.
That night, after calming down from your conversation with David, you finally do the thing that you've been putting off for far too long. The thing that causes panic to swell in your chest and your mind to recoil whenever you start to examine it. 
You think about your mother.
So you pour a glass of wine, set your phone off to the side, flop down on your couch, and you begin to metaphorically unpack.
You've always prided yourself on being an intelligent woman. You know, logically, this will help you feel better in the long run. It will help you heal. Help you grow. And right now that's what you yearn for—to know and embrace yourself as you truly are, not who you pretended to be for so long that you almost believed it. Not your mask.
The mask that you built because of her, you think. One crafted out of fear and shame. Other people may have honed it, but she laid the foundation.
You also know she's the reason you have so many hang ups and difficulties forming connections with people. You know it's part of the reason you've been miserable for so long. You know this needs to be done. You know that.
It still…well, it hurts.
You learned at a young age to be fiercely independent because you couldn't count on her for support. Or encouragement. Or warmth. Her answer was always the same: "Pray or go to confession." As if all of your problems were your own fault or stemmed from a lack of faith.
And the message was clear—The only love you'll ever get is God's love. Maybe he can fix you.
You wanted it, though. God, did you want her to gather you in her arms and tell you, just once, that she was proud of you. That she truly loved you. You did everything you could to please and placate and impress her, hoping if you were good enough or hid well enough, you might finally get all of that. You got good grades, you were well-behaved, and you went to church, even when you stopped believing. You gave up your dream of being an artist for her, for christsake!
Sure, a part of that was because she tainted the piece of yourself you turned to for expression and escape. But since you're already unpacking every horrible bit of this, you can finally admit to yourself that you also gave it up for her.
For nothing.
Because it didn't work. Getting a business degree and an office job didn't make her proud, it only created a new direction in which you were lacking. You lost a part of yourself and got nothing in return. The thought of it makes you so angry that hot tears prick your eyes.
You get up to pour yourself another glass of wine.
You don't even know why your mother treated you the way she did. You think that if you could at least know why it might be easier to stomach. Then you wouldn't feel so confused and lost. Sure, it would hurt, but it would be something solid you could sit with.
Perhaps she saw that you weren't what she would call normal, and she hated it—wanted to spurn you into changing and hiding. It's ironic, then, that her disgust just fueled that darkness within you. Gave it the sustenance it needed to grow, devoid of warmth, in the corners of your heart and mind.
Maybe all of this would have turned out differently, if only she had loved you.
Or perhaps that's just who she is, and, even if you had been everything she wanted, it still wouldn't have made a difference. Still wouldn't have been good enough. You got it from somewhere, after all.
You'll never know either way.
What you do know is this: If you couldn't count on your own mother, then why would you ever think you could count on or trust anyone else?
Why wouldn't they brush you aside eventually as well? Why bother getting close to anyone—assuming they didn't bore you in the first place? Why wouldn't they see the real you and look just as disgusted as the one person that should have loved you unconditionally? 
And people continuously proved you right by walking away when you didn't thaw under their attention or they caught a glimpse of that darkness—until David. Until he looked and saw the real you, and it only made him want you more.
Well, you're thawing now.
No.
You're melting.
You wonder what your mother would think of you if she could see you at this very moment. On one hand, you've laid waste to the life you built for yourself for a man that stalked you. She'd have a few choice words for you there, such as disappointment and embarrassment. "What will people think?" But on the other hand, you finally have someone and he's rich, which would go a long way towards forgiveness. Because, even though she prides herself on her piety, pride is her greatest sin. She would tell everyone she knew, as if it were her achievement, while conveniently leaving out the rest of it. Like the fact that you're happy.
As you're pouring your third glass of wine, you debate calling her. It's not too late. She should still be awake. You can finally ask her why. Why nothing you've done has ever been good enough. Why she cared about God and what everyone else thought more than her own daughter. 
You can ask her why you can't remember the last time she hugged you or told you she loved you. Because a daughter should be able to recall that, shouldn't she? Oh, she said it plenty in front of other people. She gave you scraps with no meaning behind the words or warmth in her eyes. But in private, where no one else was watching her performance? You got nothing. You starved for affection. Maybe you can ask her why.
But you know that's the alcohol talking.
And it wouldn't do any good anyway. You won't get the answers you seek or the apology you need. You won't get promises to do better. You won't get a mom.
This was all for nothing.
Instead, you pick up your phone and block her number.
No contact. A clean cut. Never again.
You expect that to hurt, too, but for the first time since you started this, you feel lighter. Because you're finally done looking for hope where there isn't any to be found. You're also finally acknowledging that you deserved everything she never gave you. And that isn't a failing on your part—it never was. It's her failure. Another one of her sins. Now it's her loss.
Maybe you should have done that years ago, but you're doing it now. You're moving forward and letting go, and that's what's important.
While your phone is in your hand, you check your messages to confirm that David hasn't sent you anything. You aren't surprised. You hadn't expected him to. But that doesn't mean you didn't want him to.
You want it all the time now, you realize. It's only been a couple of hours since you ended the call, but you'd still love nothing more than to get back on and talk to him again until the early hours of the morning.
You may have been able to stop yourself from angrily calling your mother, but the combination of wine and your already weakening grasp on your self-control when it comes to him means you're typing before you even realize it.
"Thank you. For everything. I can never say it enough, David, because you've done more for me than any person in my life EVER has. I mean it. Truly. I'm so grateful."
"Also, for the record, I'm certain I could pick you out of a crowd now."
You're welcome. Always.
And I'll keep that in mind the next time I need coffee.
You smile at your phone. Your eyes are watery, your cheeks are warm, and your lips are lopsided and trembling. You can blame all of that on the wine, but the way your heart is battering against your ribcage?
You've got it bad for some words on a screen, a hand, a pair of shoes, and a ghost.
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The next morning, you sleep in until a gloriously late hour. Just because you can. And because last night was emotionally exhausting—you're certain the wine didn't help either. Even when you're no longer tired, you lie in bed, wrapped in the warmth of your blankets, and bask in the knowledge that you never have to go back to that office ever again.
Or speak to your mother, you think with a contented sigh.
You feel untethered, but not adrift. No, you know exactly which direction you're headed, and now you have the freedom to do so.
Eventually you resume your search for a new bed on your phone as well because you start to think about how blissful this lounging would have been on a comfortable mattress. With silk sheets. And a new nightgown... Oh, now there's an interesting thought. You could get something new and sexy. Maybe something with lace. Or more silk. Or, even better, something sheer that barely covers your ass.
You also think about how much David would enjoy all of those things.
You start off looking at sleepwear that leans more sensible than sexy, but as you begin to wonder what he would think of each one, you quickly find yourself clicking on more and more revealing pieces.
It's when you're looking at a see through, drapey number that comes off with only a clasp between your breasts that your phone buzzes with a new text message.
You grin. You wondered how long it would be before he reached out to you. Now you're absolutely certain he's keeping tabs on you and saw how racy your searches were getting. Part of you was doing it on purpose—baiting him until he couldn't resist any longer. Even if it gave him away. You know better than to trust a coincidence.
Are you enjoying your first day of freedom?
"Immensely. I haven't even gotten out of bed yet." You're smug as you hit send because now you've added the thought of you in bed to his mental image of the lingerie.
Is that so? Sounds as though you're having a lovely morning.
Any other exciting plans for the day?
"Not unless you count a date with a book on my nightstand."
Depends on what kind of book.
"Well, there are two of them for me to choose from. One is a murder mystery. The other is a steamy romance novel." It's a lie. You have two art history books and an Amedeo Modigliani biography on your nightstand.
I see. Two very different types of thrilling.
"Exactly. On one hand, the murder mystery would stimulate my brain."
It takes a minute longer for you to get a response to that.
And what would the romance novel stimulate?
"My heart, David. What else?" You bite your lip in excitement as you continue to type.
"Now tell me which one you would like best."
If I had to choose between the two, I would prefer the murder mystery.
"Of course you would. But I meant which of the lingerie you would like best. Because I know you were watching me."
There's another pause.
All of them.
"All of them?! But there were so many!"
I'm certain. I liked all of them.
Especially since you'd be the one wearing them.
A pleasant heat unfurls in your chest and creeps up your neck at the thought of him sitting there, watching you browse, picturing you in every outfit…and maybe even saving a few of the links for later.
"Well then. I'll keep that in mind. I really liked the maroon silk one, personally. I bet it would feel nice on my skin."
I agree, it would feel very nice on your skin.
Fuck.
The mental image of his hand trailing up your thigh—pushing the hem of the nightgown higher and higher while the fabric and his palm slide over your quivering flesh—flashes vividly through your mind.
You had been enjoying a morning of relaxation and contentment just a few minutes ago. Even with a bit of light teasing about the lingerie, it had been peaceful. Now? Now that feeling has been reshaped and is nothing more than a memory. Now a slick heat has ignited in your core, and you're left nearly panting and writhing in your blankets from the intensity of it.
How quickly he can send you reeling.
God, you're definitely buying that one. Later. Right now, however, you finally have the chance to flirt with him—really flirt—and you're going to take it. Because you know where this is headed. You know where it could have resolved yesterday but didn't because you were at work.
And you're so glad you're not at work right now, stuck squirming and struggling at your desk as you try to ignore the swollen ache between your legs. Instead, you're squirming in the privacy of your bed, and you no longer have to ignore anything. Now you have no intention of stopping.
This is how you want to respond to him.
You're also really enjoying feigning innocence, and you're curious to see how much longer he'll play along. Because you have no illusions that he's buying a second of it.
"I don't think I'll be getting the black one with the sheer lace top, though. It didn't look very comfortable. I wouldn't be able to wear it for long."
Before he can reply, you quickly type out, "Wait. You're not busy, are you? I should have asked first before carrying on about my online shopping. That was rude of me."
I'm not anymore.
"Just get out of a meeting?"
I just canceled my last meeting because I've suddenly found something much better to do.
"Is helping me pick out pajamas really that thrilling?"
You can stop playing dumb now. You and I both know exactly what you're doing.
"What am I doing?" You straighten up and hold your breath in anticipation. You must be getting to him. You expected him to hold out just a little bit longer. Not that you're complaining. Not when you know you have his full attention.
You're trying to get me bothered as payback for yesterday.
"Is it working?"
You know it is.
"And just how bothered are you?"
Very.
You let out a shaky breath as you sink back into your pillows and begin to settle in. "Good. But that's not the only reason I'm doing this, David."
Is that so? What other reason do you have?
"Because I want to. Because I'm enjoying having the freedom to respond to you the way that I want."
Intriguing. And how are you doing that?
"I'm sure you'll find out soon enough." You shift your phone to your dominant hand to keep it steady. Then your other hand disappears beneath your covers and continues traveling down to the waistband of your panties.
Will I?
"You will. As long as you continue to please me." You nudge the fabric out of the way to give yourself the access you need and eagerly slip your hand inside. When your fingers finally brush over your arousal, you groan with relief.
There's nothing I want more than to please you.
"Is that so? How are you going to do that?" You repeat his words back to him as you rub a little harder along your damp folds. The added pressure makes your eyelids go heavy with lust. You spread your legs wider, seeking even more of that friction.
By giving you what you need.
God, you want that. From him. The thought of it makes you ache. Your fingers move to circle over your clit, dragging some of your wetness with them, and you moan into your empty bedroom. You shakily type out, "And what do I need?"
Me.
Shit. You had planned to go slow and tease yourself. You wanted to draw out the banter so you could savor your first time touching yourself to him. Because, despite the fact that he's turned you into a horny wreck several times already, you've held off until now. But as you read his text—that single word—it's as if your body has been doused in kerosene and lit on fire. Your hand speeds up.
"You seem awfully sure of that."
I'm very sure.
Are you going to tell me that I'm wrong? Or are you going to be honest?
You quickly debate finding a way to deny it. To get him to push harder because his arrogant confidence is stoking the flame in your belly and you want more. But every response you come up with sounds so flimsy. You know it won't work. He'll just call out the lie. He knows exactly how you're responding to him now, and he won't let it go, like a shark sensing blood in the water.
Well, if he wants to circle, then you'll give him prey instead—something he can't resist.
"Honest."
There's a good girl. Then be honest for me. Tell me what you need.
You cry out and your hips roll to meet the rhythm of your fingers. Your other hand is still gripping your cell phone, holding onto it for dear life so you don't drop it and miss a single word. "You."
That's right. And are you thinking about me right now?
"Yes." You are. You're thinking about his hands all over you, driving you wild and breathless and working needy little whimpers from your throat.
Very good. I hope you're thinking about all of the things I plan to do to you when I finally get my hands on you.
"Tell me. Please." More, you think. God, you need more.
And spoil the surprise? You'll have to use your imagination for now.
You grunt in frustration. "That's a little difficult when I don't know what you look like."
That is unfortunate, isn't it?
He's so god-damned smug! Jesus, it's infuriating!
There's a responding surge of wetness beneath your fingers, and the slick sound becomes obscene in your quiet bedroom.
"I've told you, it's unfair."
Nothing about this is supposed to be fair.
Your grip weakens and your phone nearly slips from your grasp, but you frantically right it. You're getting so close… "David, please!"
I promise when we move forward, you'll find out for yourself. But only when you're ready.
Unless you're done hesitating?
You know he's dangling that in front of you, tempting you with what you want so you'll say yes. You want to say yes. You want to call him right now and let him hear you say it as you moan and beg into the phone.
But that's giving him too much.
You're done hesitating. Of course you are. But when you take that step, it's going to be on your terms. You know, instinctively, that you should never give up too much power to him. Both because it would be so easy to lose yourself in him—which you don't want to do now that you've finally found yourself—and because he would delight in never giving it back.
"I suppose we'll see, won't we? I would hate to ruin the surprise."
Now who's being unfair?
"I'm only playing by your rules."
Clever.
My clever, beautiful girl. I can't wait to see you like this. I bet you look so good for me right now. Don't you?
"Yes!"
That's right. So fucking good and needy for me. God, I want you so much.
Your grip goes slack again, and this time you do drop your phone onto the bed. But you don't stop to pick it up. You're too far gone now, and you couldn't type even if you wanted to. Instead, you redouble your effort and greedily chase your orgasm, your hand moving in rapid strokes against your clit.
It's fast and messy and desperate. You haven't masturbated like this in years, but the tension has been building inside of you. It's grown under all of his teasing, his suggestive comments, his perceptive observations, and his unrevealing photos until you couldn't ignore it any longer. Now you need to release it at last—to immolate yourself in your desire.
For him.
"David," you moan. His name rolls off your tongue for the first time in ecstasy. It happens so naturally, as if you've said it that way a hundred times before. As if your mouth knows the way to give shape to your longing.
Hearing his name, when you're already poised on that edge, is your undoing.
You throw your head back into the pillow and arch off the bed with a cry as that tension finally snaps, sending a white hot fission through your veins in its place. Your toes curl and your newly freed hand bunches a fistful of your sheets, pulling them taut while your whole body shudders with every violent swell of pleasure.
As you come, all you can think about is him. "Fuck!" The movement of your fingers over your clit becomes jerky, but never slows. You're determined to make every second of this feel so fucking good. "David!" It rolls and rolls and rolls through you, weakening and yet seemingly without end as you work every last bit of rapture from your sensitive flesh—
Until, finally, you collapse against the bed with a whimper, and your hand flops weakly down onto the mattress next to you. You lay there, gasping for breath, your eyes closed, and your limbs and your brain and your belly humming in the heady afterglow of your release.
By all accounts, this should bring you a bone deep satisfaction. It should have quelled the fire that burns for him, even if only temporarily.
But as your mind clears, you feel quite the opposite. As if something has awakened inside of you, stirring from a deep slumber in that same way he roused your darkness.
And it's ravenous.
You grope along the bedspread for your phone.
When you pick it back up, your hands are still trembling from the intensity of your orgasm.
"I think I'm rather enjoying my new freedom."
So am I.
A groan is wrenched from your chest as you glance up at his previous messages and wonder just how much he was enjoying it. You have a pretty good guess.
"God, David. I miss you."
I miss you, too. But not for much longer.
"Would you like to chat now?" There's a renewed flutter of interest from your swollen sex as you think about doing this again, but for him.
There's nothing I want more. Unfortunately, I have some important personal matters to take care of this afternoon, but I promise the evening is yours. How does 6 o'clock sound?
There's a pang of disappointment in your chest. That's hours from now! But before you can pout, you remind yourself that you're an adult. You can control and entertain yourself until then, for christsake. Besides, he said the evening was yours. You'll have plenty of time to talk to him later.
You also really want to ask what sort of personal matters because you're curious about what they could be, and about him in general, but he would have elaborated if he wanted you to know. The word personal also denotes a certain level of privacy. So you leave it be. For now.
"That sounds lovely. I'm looking forward to it."
Me too. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy your date with the book on your nightstand.
"I've changed my mind there, actually. I have a lot more shopping to do instead." You give your phone a little grin.
Oh?
"Yes. It's been so productive and satisfying thus far. Who knows what other wonderful things might result from it?"
I see.
"I hope you enjoy your afternoon."
I'm certain I will. Enjoy your shopping.
You end up purchasing some of the lingerie that gets you particularly worked up whenever you think about him—especially the maroon one. Then you spend the rest of your day purging your wardrobe of your boring work clothes and whatever else reminds you too much of your old life. The result is a sparse apartment and an even barer closet, but you like it. It's a reflection of where you are in life and of all the room you have to grow and rebuild the way you want.
You may occasionally take breaks from downsizing to browse for new outfits and dresses, but it's to figure out what you like so you can eventually replace what you're getting rid of. It's definitely not to keep David intrigued throughout the day and looking forward to talking to you again. Not when he's so busy. That would be cruel.
You can't remember ever smiling this much.
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You log on several minutes early. You don't care that it's probably a little pathetic. You don't even care if it lets him know exactly how eager you are for this. You've been checking the clock since five and you were getting impatient. You can only pace so many circles in your living room before you lose your mind. Not that sitting there and staring at your own face is any better, but at least it gets you closer to him.
To your relief, he logs on a few minutes early, too. Possibly because he knows you're already here, but you hope it’s because he was impatient as well. The electronic chime makes your heart swell in your chest.
"Hello, David."
Hello, darling.
The image of you on the screen practically swoons at his greeting. There's no other way to describe the gentle tilting of your head, your dreamy smile, or how your eyes soften with affection.
You barely recognize this woman.
You're not sure you've ever made that face before now. Or if you have, it was when the National Gallery rotated Cornelius van Haarlem's Two Followers of Cadmus devoured by a Dragon back into display after you hadn't seen it in a while. Never for another person. Certainly not for a black square not even three centimeters wide.
This man is dangerous.
Getting impatient, were you?
"I knew you were going to say something," you grumble as you fight off a sudden wave of embarrassment.
How could I not? You have no idea how lovely this feeling is. It's gratifying to have such a beautiful woman wanting to talk to you.
You lean in close and lower your voice. "In that case, I was very impatient."
Hmm. I'm so very pleased to hear it.
Did you have a productive afternoon?
"I did, actually. I accomplished quite a bit."
Good. And did you have fun shopping?
"You know I did." You give the camera a heated smile. While it wasn't as risque as the lingerie, the clothes you were looking at—low cut silky blouses, high slit skirts, backless tops, skin tight pants—were still sexy, just in a more subtle way.
Do I?
You roll your eyes and ignore the obvious bait—something that would have irritated a response from you just a few days ago. "How was your afternoon?"
Also productive, despite the circumstances.
"Circumstances?" You cock an eyebrow, no longer able to ignore it. He really does know how to push your buttons, after all, much to your chagrin. "Do you mean with your personal matters or do you mean spying on me?"
Both, but I wouldn't call it spying.
"Well, I would! So it serves you right." Despite your fake outrage, you're thrilled he was still paying attention, even when he was busy.
Do you want me to stop?
You pause to consider your answer. You think you should probably be unsettled that he's monitoring all of your activity. If any other man did that, you would be furious and horrified, but he's not any other man. He's also not holding it over you, making you feel bad, or controlling what you're doing. So far—your answer would change if he were. He's simply looking.
And you enjoy knowing that he's looking. In a strange way, it makes you feel connected to him, even when you aren't chatting, as if it's just another aspect of your relationship. It also makes you feel like you're the most important and interesting thing in his life—you'll admit that particular feeling has become quite addictive. You enjoy being able to take advantage of it as well, like you did this afternoon.
However, there may be times when you do want privacy for a specific reason. He certainly doesn't need to know every detail about your hygiene purchases or your embarrassing Google searches. Well, future embarrassing searches, anyway. It also makes it very difficult to surprise him if he can see what you're up to.
"No, I don't want you to stop." Your lips curl into a seductive smile. "I like it quite a bit, in fact. I just have one condition."
What's that?
"If I do ever ask for privacy, you give it to me. No questions asked and no looking."
Of course. Then you'll have it.
"I mean it," you say seriously. "I need to trust you'll respect my wishes."
You have my word that I will give you privacy whenever you request it. You only ever need to ask.
"Alright." You relax in your chair, mollified by his response. Because you believe him. "Thank you, David."
You're welcome.
Now tell me about your productivity.
"That's not a very exciting topic of conversation, I'm afraid. In fact, most of it was quite boring."
Tell me anyway.
"Well, I went through my flat and got rid of everything that felt like it belonged to the person I was pretending to be and not me."
I see. That doesn't sound boring. You shed another one of your layers.
I bet it felt good.
"It did! It felt freeing. I didn't realize before how much my place felt like a stage. As if the performance didn't stop, even when I was alone. And when I had a roommate? God, no wonder I was always so miserable."
It's also probably why you grew to resent every roommate you've ever had, no matter how much you didn't mind or tolerated them when they moved in. It didn't matter if they were quiet or cleaned up after themselves. Their presence meant the only place you could truly let your guard down was your bedroom. It was exhausting.
"But now the set dressings are gone. No more calf length pencil skirts or tacky lingerie. No more gifted kitchen gadgets and holiday candles. No more cheap art prints of pieces that I don't even like.” Then you grumble, “God, I swear I had like, half a dozen versions of Irises.”
No more mask.
"No more mask," you repeat out loud with a sigh of relief. Even saying it feels incredible. "Speaking of, you'll be pleased to hear I've also been doing some reflecting since we talked yesterday." You can't help the smug grin that creeps onto your face.
Oh?
"Yes. I've figured out where my reflex to apologize when I think I've upset or inconvenienced someone comes from."
Have you? Does that mean you're ready to talk about your mother?
You huff out a laugh and shake your head. Of course. You should have seen that coming. "You're frighteningly good at that."
It's a gift.
You can feel his smirk through your screen. "So it is. And I'm glad to know that I'm predictable."
I never used that word.
"It's true, though." You shrug, unbothered by your own statement. "It's a behavior that's usually learned in childhood. In this instance, I'm not particularly unique."
I disagree.
"I just meant that a lot of people have troubled relationships with their parents." A lot of them developed the same issues from it as well, you think to yourself. Granted, the cliche is that women in the sex work industry have daddy issues, not mommy issues. So perhaps you're not entirely predictable.
And yet, they're not you. They didn't become what you are.
"And just what am I?" That's another thing you haven't looked at too closely. You've been so consumed with the "who," you haven't really considered the "what."
You're something entirely different. Something more like me.
"That's not an answer."
I assure you, it is.
"It's not, David," you insist. "I still don't fully know what that means!"
If you're expecting me to pathologize you instead, I'm not going to.
"Why not?" You tilt your head curiously. You weren't actually expecting him to, but now you're intrigued as to why he won't.
Because that's not an answer to your question either. Those terms and labels are just more costumes that don't suit you. You're far more than that.
Before you can object that you disagree and that it might actually help you understand yourself better, he continues on. As if he anticipated what you were going to say.
It would also imply there's something wrong with you. But there's nothing wrong with you, despite what anyone may have told you in the past.
"You really do have me all figured out, don't you?" There's more affection in your voice than you intended.
I told you. I see you.
"You do. And I'm guessing you see my text message history, too." You raise an eyebrow at the camera in challenge, daring him to deny it.
You thought a lot about what else he would have access to after he blindsided you with the knowledge of your side bank account. Reading your texts would be absurdly easy in comparison, so of course he knows about your relationship with your mother. It's also how he knew that threatening to tell her your secret would be so effective.
That as well.
"I think that's the first thing I know you've seen that I feel embarrassed about."
Why?
"Because it means you've seen the worst of my mask," you say quietly.
I wouldn't say that. I saw a daughter desperate for her mother's affection and approval.
"Oh, god," you groan as you rub a hand over your face, completely mortified by his phrasing, but unable to find fault in it. "That's exactly what I mean!"
You're not the one who should be embarrassed by those messages.
"I'm the only one that is. Or will be. Trust me, she thinks everything she's ever said to me was righteous and justified, and you can't get blood from a stone." You flop your hand back onto the desk—a little harder than you meant to—and it makes your webcam shake.
You can already feel that mixture of hurt and anger rising in your throat and threatening to spill out. You quickly swallow it down and take a deep breath to regain control over your emotions. You're not going to have a breakdown on camera because of her. You're done letting her hurt you.
It's not righteous or justified, but I'm guessing you know that already.
"I do, but I appreciate the reassurance anyway." You give him a soft, grateful smile. Then your face falls as you glance back down to your keyboard. "What else did you see?"
Most of your text conversations with her are arguments. I suspect your phone conversations are similar.
"They are," you confirm without hesitation. "I don't think we know how to communicate any other way."
But you're not the instigator, are you?
"No," you sigh heavily. "I do everything I can to avoid an argument because I'm just so tired of it, but it usually doesn't matter. She can always find fault with my tone or something I've said. And of course there's also the fact that I don't go to church, don't have an important career, haven't gotten married, and don't have or want children. You can imagine her disappointment."
I shudder to think.
What an exhausting, horrible woman.
"That she is," you can't help but laugh. Despite the heavy topic of conversation, his irritation on your behalf is endearing. "I hate calling her or answering the phone. And God forbid I need something! You'll note that when I needed money to keep my flat, I became a camgirl before I even thought about asking her for help."
I had noticed you never considered doing anything else. Then I read your messages and it wasn't difficult to understand why.
You try not to feel mortified once again at the reminder that he's seen those. Instead, you tell yourself that he saw them and he kept looking. They didn't disgust him or scare him off—from you anyway. Even after reading them, he still wanted you.
You truly understand now what he's always meant when he says he sees you. It's a very assuring, lovely thought.
"It turned out to be a wonderful decision, at least." You give the camera a coy smile in an attempt to lighten the mood.
I would have to agree. A very wonderful decision.
"She wouldn't have helped me anyway, so I knew it was pointless. The few times she did, she lorded it over me constantly. As if I should be forever in her debt because she paid for my university textbooks years ago."
Is that another reason you were so afraid to take my money? Or why you were worried about feeling as though you owed me?
"Huh…" You lean back in your chair as you mull THAT one over. You hadn't quite connected those dots yet, but now that he's pointed it out, you have always been bad at accepting any help or gifts. Every single one felt like it came with an unspoken expectation or debt of some kind that would be called upon later. Now you know why.
You briefly wonder what other sort of connections you'll make in the future. Because you're starting to realize there are still plenty of them left to be uncovered.
"I think that was part of it, certainly, but you have to admit, the circumstances were also a very big factor as to why I didn't want your money."
Of course. You thought I was trying to buy you.
"I absolutely did! And in a way, you were," you tease. "It was just my attention you were paying for."
I made no attempt to hide that what I wanted was you, but it really was a gift. I knew the money would give you the freedom to think about everything I said, and once you did, you could no longer ignore your mask. Then maybe you would finally rid yourself of it. I wanted that for you.
And I wanted to see what would become of you when your strings were cut.
"Well, are you pleased with your handiwork?"
Quite pleased. I'm enjoying seeing the real you and how beautifully you've flourished in the light, now that you're no longer hiding.
"I have flourished, haven't I? I feel at home in my own skin for the first time in my life." You arch your shoulders, stretching lazily as if to savor the truth of your statement, before resting your forearms on the desk. You look quite pleased with yourself as well. "For so long I've been afraid to peel back all those layers and confront what's underneath, but now that I'm finally realizing who I am and what I want, I can't stop picking. I like what's underneath."
So do I.
You deserve to be proud. You've been working very hard to find your truth.
A warmth radiates through your chest at his praise.
"I have." Then you smile sadly. "Unfortunately, the truth hasn't always been painless."
No. It's never that.
"But every second has been worth it to have this." You glance up at the camera and let the double meaning hang in the air.
I'm glad. And I would have to agree. Wholeheartedly.
After a hesitation, you say, "One of those painful truths was realizing that my mother probably had a big hand in making me what I am."
Darling, NO.
The only thing she had a hand in was making you feel ashamed of yourself or like you had to hide what you are. She tried to destroy something exquisite and she failed. You are what you are despite her.
Do you know why? It's because you're better than her. You always have been and she knows it. Why do you think she treats you the way she does? That woman is a monster and she doesn't deserve any part of you.
Your eyes immediately fill with tears as you read the chat box. No one's ever told you that before. You may have come to the same conclusion last night, but you had no idea how much you needed to hear it from someone else, so to speak. Now hearing it from him?
"God, David. I've never…" you trail off, your voice choked with emotion. It takes you a second to get control over yourself enough to continue. "Thank you. And you're right." You sniffle and quickly try to blink away the tears. Then with more force, you say, "I've endured her for too long. Thankfully, I never have to again. I blocked her number last night and I'm cutting her out of my life."
You did?
"I did. Once I realized there was nothing good there to hold onto, even the idea of removing her from my life brought me more peace and happiness than having her in it ever did."
Good. I hope it does.
"So far, so good." You give him a teary smile.
I'm sure that couldn't have been easy.
"It wasn't. Or at least the process of coming to that conclusion wasn't, but it was all far more anticlimactic than I thought it would be."
Is that why you sent me that message?
"Oh, god." Your face begins to burn with embarrassment as you remember texting him while more than a little tipsy. "Yes," you finally answer sheepishly while you glance up at the ceiling. 
Why are you embarrassed by that?
"Because, if I'm being honest, I was two and a half glasses of wine in when I sent that."
Were you now?
"I was. I knew it was the only way I would be able to cope with that whole process."
And did it help?
"I think it did. I got through it, anyway. I'm just glad that I didn't call or text her. God, that would have been a trainwreck." You glance suggestively up at the camera and lower your voice. "I have far less self-control when it comes to you, apparently."
You have no idea how much I enjoy hearing that.
"But we should both be grateful that I didn't send you anything messier than I already did."
I don't know, sounds intriguing.
"See, you're thinking about me sending you something sexy, but I'm worried about sending you something frantic and emotional," you laugh. "Which would have been far more likely given the circumstances."
Hmm. I see your point.
"So anticlimactic really was for the best all around. And it's done now."
Good riddance.
"Do you want to know the worst part, though?" This time there's a bitterness to your smile, and it doesn't meet your eyes. "Through all of this, I never stopped wanting her to love me. I tried so hard. I never stopped trying, but she did. A long time ago. She'll never be the mom that I want, just like I was never the daughter she wanted. I know that now and I've finally made peace with that reality. Plus, realizing I would never understand or get any sort of closure was another big catalyst for me to finally pull that trigger the way I did." Your face finally softens. "But I never would have confronted any of that if not for you."
You would have gotten there on your own. Eventually.
“Possibly. I was getting exhausted from it. To the point that everytime my phone rang, I considered tossing it out the window rather than answer it.”
I could make her life miserable, you know.
If you asked it of me.
"Tempting." You let out a chuckle and wipe away the remnants of a tear drying on your cheek. "But I'd rather her not be in my life at all, even through you. I'm making a clean cut so she can no longer use me to build herself up, and for her that will be a worse punishment than anything you could think of."
I don't know. I have a very vivid imagination.
But I will leave it be unless you change your mind.
"I do appreciate the offer." You smile gratefully. "That's twice now you've given me the opportunity for vengeance."
It won't be the last, should you ever feel the need for it.
"Is it strange that I find the thought of you wanting to make someone miserable for hurting me sweet and endearing?"
No.
I would hurt anyone you asked me to, even if all they did was annoy you.
"You would?"
I would. Without hesitation. For you.
"Fuck," you gasp as you squirm in your seat, suddenly very turned on. "I really like the thought of that."
Do you?
"I do." 
How much?
"This much." You bite your lip as you bring your hands to your top. Then you begin to slowly unbutton your blouse. The heat that started between your thighs rises to your belly. This is finally happening.
There's a pause.
You're sure?
"Yes. I'm so sure you didn't even have to ask." Your fingers continue to methodically work each loop as you speak, driven on by determination. "I'm done hesitating. I want this, David. I wanted it last night before I got interrupted, and I wanted it this afternoon."
You’ve found closure for so much of your past—all the ties to your old life, your social media, your friends, your job, your mother—and you're done looking back. All you want now is to move forward. After all the emotional turmoil you went through to get to this point, all you want is to fall into him.
Once you’ve finished, your top spills open, revealing the cups of your bra and your bare stomach on the screen. The chat box sits, unmoving, and you realize he must be watching very carefully. So you slide the fabric down your arms, seductively arching your chest towards the camera to make a show of it, until it comes free. You toss it to the side without looking. Then you're left in nothing but your bra and skirt.
"I want you to see me. All of me. I want to show you what you're missing, hiding from me behind that screen. You could be here with your hands and your mouth on me, instead, you know. I want you to think about that, and I want you to touch yourself while you do." You look directly into the webcam with all of the desire, need, and heat that has been building up inside of you for the past week. "Because I plan to as well. Again."
You have no idea how much I’ve resisted doing all of that. It's taken every ounce of my self-control to resist you.
"Why can't we just give in then?" You beg for the camera. "Why can't we just skip this part? Come here now. Tonight. Touch me instead."
You aren't ready for that yet.
"I strongly disagree!" You scoff, almost offended at the implication that you don't know what you want.
Besides, I get to see you like this first, remember? I get to see you in a way no one else ever has. I've earned it.
"You have," you sigh in acceptance. You knew it was a long shot, but it was worth a try. "Don't worry, I'll give it to you. Not just because I'm too fucking horny to argue with you properly right now, but also because I said I would, and I'm still going to enjoy letting go for you. Just know that it's a poor substitute for you. Because what I really want is to hear your voice as you tell me how good it feels to fuck me. I want to hear the way you moan and gasp when you lose control of yourself inside of me. I want to know your face when you do. Because I want you, David."
It takes a moment for him to reply. You're aware you'll never get to know exactly how he responded to you. You'll never get to see the look on his face or hear the sounds he made as you said those things to him. But, you think with no small amount of smugness, you can take a very good guess.
Then you'll have me. Soon.
Until then, show me what I'll have.
Take off the rest of your clothes. I want to see you.
You stand up from your chair to do as he instructed. The angle of the camera means your face is no longer in view, and it reminds you so much of your streams that it's momentarily jarring. But once you unzip your skirt, you bend forward to push it down your hips, and the sight of your own face brings you back to the moment.
The one where you're stripping for your stalker slash blackmailer, and it's the sexiest, most romantic thing that's ever happened to you.
Your skirt hits the floor with a soft thump, and you step out of it as you nudge it to the side with your foot. If you remove one more thing, it will be the most he's ever seen of you. Now each step forward is not only new, but is one step closer to getting what you really want: Him.
The thought is thrilling.
So thrilling that you waste no time. You hook your thumbs into the thin elastic of your panties and slip them—slowly, inch by inch to continue teasing him—to your knees, baring your lower half to him.
You stand there for a few seconds, letting him take it all in. That's what he wanted, after all. To see all of you. For you to show him all of you. Every moment between you has been leading to this, and you won't deny him now.
When you sit back down, you slide your panties the rest of the way off. They get thoughtlessly added to the growing, scattered pile. Then you stay there on your repurposed dining room chair, bare skin on wood, and you wait.
As you do, you're very careful to keep your legs closed. It wouldn't do to rush this and give everything away all at once. Especially not when you currently hold all of the power. He may have earned this, but so have you. And you’re going to relish it for as long as you can.
Except there's still nothing new in the chat box. You tell yourself he's probably just settling in and enjoying the view, but the silence is unnerving. You have no way of knowing what he's thinking right now, if he's even enjoying it, and that makes you feel exposed. You’ve gotten so comfortable with the back and forth—of getting some feedback—that not getting it is a sobering reminder that you can't read his expressions or hear the tone of his voice. All he really is to you is text on a screen.
“David?” You call out hesitantly.
Another minute passes and you start to wonder if he's intentionally trying to make you squirm. He does enjoy it, after all. Or perhaps he recognizes how the balance of power has shifted, and he's trying to take some back for himself. It does seem like a very David thing to do.
Then, without warning, your mind offers up the possibility that he's disappointed. That you aren't what he was expecting and now he’s—
God, you’re beautiful. I knew you would be.
Relief courses through you, alleviating the weight that was settling in your chest.
Or maybe he was just taking his pants off, too.
I want to see the rest of you.
That's all the reassurance you need to banish that momentary doubt completely.
You reach behind yourself to undo the clasp of your bra. Rather than remove it, you hug the material loosely to your chest and give the camera a coy glance.
“You mean like this?” You tease as your fingers play with the straps.
Yes.
Take it off.
You slowly lower your arms, letting it fall away from your breasts. And just like that, you're naked on screen—something you never thought would happen. Something you swore would never happen. But there you are, running the tips of your fingers enticingly up the tops of your thighs and over your bare hips. For him.
Seeing you like this was worth every second of waiting. You're stunning. Just perfect.
“Thank you, David,” you say softly, touched by his compliments. It’s sweet, but if he keeps this up, you’ll be feeling more affectionate than horny.
You have no idea how much I want to be the one touching you right now.
That's better.
"Oh, but I think I know exactly what it's like to want you to be the one touching me. Do you have any idea how much I've fantasized about your hands on me since you sent me that picture? God, if I hadn't been at work, I would have made myself come so many times."
That's why I didn't want you distracted.
"I wasn't distracted this afternoon," you say in a husky voice.
No you weren't. 
Did it feel good to finally give in?
"Yes." You bite your lip as you remember the way that growing tension in your belly finally gave when you moaned his name. "It felt so good to respond to you."
Did you think about me touching you like you wanted?
"God, yes. In every way I could think of."
Where did you imagine me touching you? Show me where you like to be touched.
You run a finger from your jaw, down the column of your neck, and then trace along your collarbone. "If you kiss me here, I'll be weak in your arms. But if I feel your tongue here, you'll have me begging."
Then I'll have you weak and begging.
Is that all?
"I was getting there." You smile playfully. “So impatient.”
You continue to run your fingers down your sternum, letting your knuckles skim against the swell of your breasts. You stop and move to cup the soft flesh with your hands.
“I want your lips and your hands here,” you moan as you start to gently massage yourself. Your nipples harden under your palms as you rub over them, causing a pleasant shiver to snake its way through you. Then you arch into your own hands as you think about what it would be like to have his hands here instead. Whether his touch would be gentle like this, or harsh as he wrenches a shudder from the sensitive peaks.
I'm going to enjoy doing just that. Especially if you'll be this responsive for me.
“More so,” you vow, breathlessly, "because it would be you. Are you touching yourself now?"
Yes.
“Fuck,” you hiss. "Are you imagining that it's me instead?"
You know I am.
"Good because I want it to be me. I'm aching to put my hands on you, too.” Your hands lower from your breasts to brush across your stomach. “Where do you like to be touched, David?"
By you? There's nowhere I wouldn't want your hands.
Intriguing, but you know he can give you more than that. "Then where should I start?"
There’s a brief pause that almost feels like hesitation.
My face.
"Your face?” You blink in mild surprise. You weren't expecting that answer, but now you understand the hesitation. He was preparing to admit something vulnerable to you. “That's very intimate."
Is it? Maybe that's why I've never liked it before, but I think I will if you do it.
Despite how sexy all of this is, your heart flutters at the sweetness of that line. He wants intimacy with you, not just the sex. You're reminded of what he said to you yesterday: ‘I want you to be mine in every way it's possible to want someone.’
“I like the thought of that.” You lean in towards the camera, letting your eyelids go heavy as you lower your voice to something both seductive and tender. "Do you want me to cup your cheeks and stroke my fingers over you as we kiss?"
Yes.
"Then maybe I could…” You drop to a half whisper, “kiss along your jaw as well."
It's like you read my mind.
There's a pleased flush in your chest that creeps onto your face as the hint of a smile. "Do you have facial hair?"
No.
"Good to know." You imagine your lips moving over smooth, tanned skin. You wonder if it will be soft, or a little rough with age.
Do you prefer beards?
"I don't have a preference. What looks good depends on the person." You tilt your head curiously. “Have you ever tried growing a beard?”
Once. It didn't suit me.
“Then I'd prefer you without one.”
You're assembling these new, small pieces together with your existing mental image of him. It's like staring at a magic eye puzzle—if you look hard enough, you can almost swear you see the shape of him. But then you blink and it's gone.
You need more.
“Where would I touch you next?”
My chest.
"Is that so?"
Yes.
"Please tell me you don't shave your chest, too. Promise me you have chest hair."
I promise I have chest hair.
"Oh, thank god,” you sigh with relief. “Because you have hair on the backs of your hands and wrists and it's so fucking sexy. I can only imagine how sexy the rest of it is."
You like that, do you?
“Yes.”
Then I think you’ll be pleased.
"Christ, I like the sound of that.” You squirm a bit in your seat. “Where else do you like to be touched?"
My cock.
You nearly choke on a whimper. 
Up till now, this felt like an exploration—or as much as it could be with only you on the screen. You were expecting a buildup of teasing and touching and sharing before you both truly let go. Instead, he sent you reeling. Again. He must be getting impatient.
As you stare at that line, there's a painful ache of arousal between your legs. You unconsciously grind yourself down onto your chair to alleviate some of it. The seat is going to be a mess by the time you're done, you think.
"I plan to touch you there a lot."
Yes you will.
"Are you circumcised?" You can't help the curiosity that seeps into your voice.
I'm not going to describe my cock to you.
"David!" You pout at your screen. "I'm not asking for numbers, here. I just want to know what it would be like to stroke you."
And you'll find out eventually.
“That's not fair.” You are completely naked, after all.
I already told you it's not supposed to be fair.
“Yes, yes, you’re very mysterious,” you huff in disappointment.
Like I said, you’ll find out eventually.
“Soon, I hope.”
Soon.
Now I want you to go back to showing me where you want my hands.
“Do you?” You lean back in your chair. “You want more to think about while you're touching yourself?”
That's exactly what I want.
“Hmm, how can I ever say no to that?” Then you lean even further back so you can caress over the curve of your hips. “You can run your hands along here as you feel your way over my body. It will feel lovely, but I'll enjoy it even more if you grab me instead. Because I want to feel how much you need me.”
That's good because I want to grab you by the hips to hold you still as I slam my cock into you.
“Fuck, David!” You cry out. Your hands reflexively grip and squeeze your own hips at the mental image, your fingers digging almost painfully into the bone. Your sex clenches in anticipation, hoping you’ll get what he said would come next.
If he was there with you and not still on the other end of the call. God, you wish he was there.
After that, you also know the teasing and buildup has come to an end. You can't hold back any longer, and he's made it very clear that neither can he.
"Do you know where else I liked to be touched?" Before he can reply, you finally tilt your hips and spread your legs wide, exposing your sex for the camera. You settle your knees on either side of the seat of the chair with your calves tucked against the wooden legs.
You like to think, if he were there in person, he would have been opening his mouth to answer as the words died on his lips. Instead, you imagine his fingers frozen over his keyboard as he gets to see the part of you he's been waiting for. You're certain he's been going slow—stroking himself enough for it to feel good, but not so much that he loses control. Not until he gets what he wants. Not until he's gotten this.
You end the exploration of your body by reaching between your thighs. Then you cup your mound and begin teasing your fingers along your folds. God, you're already so wet. "Right here. Especially by a hand that knows what I need."
Show me what you need.
You plunge a finger into your entrance and moan at the intrusion. You can't remember the last time you did this. Usually you focus on just your clit with your fingers or your vibrator, eager for the release and not caring much about indulging in the process. You didn't have a reason for it other than getting off to relieve some tension.
Now, as you slide your finger out and draw it over that sensitive nub, you want it back inside of you. You want to be full as you think of him. So you press two inside of you instead.
"I want to know what you look like so badly," you gasp as your fingers begin to work your cunt.
Do you?
"I do. And I want to know what you feel like."
You will, that I promise you.
"God," you whine and slip a third finger into your opening. "This feels so good. I haven't fingered myself in a while."
Why not?
"I haven't wanted to. I just wanted a quick orgasm."
Then I continue to keep my promise, don't I? I made you want to.
"Yes! Christ, I want to," you gasp and rock your hips up to meet your hand. "I want to touch myself like this for you. I love knowing that you're watching me, David, and that you're getting off to it. But more than that, I love pretending that it's you."
If you're pretending that it's me, you need to go deeper because I intend to fuck you properly.
You slam your fingers into yourself as far as they will go, and your head falls back with a cry. “God, I want you to fuck me. Please!”
While I grab your pretty hips and make you take every bit of me?
“Fuck! Yes, exactly like that!” You whine. “I can't believe you're going to make us wait for this! Because you don't have to. You could have me now."
I could.
I could have you however I wanted, couldn't I?
You glance down at the camera, your eyes heavy with lust. "Would you like that?"
You're not answering the question.
"That's because I know better than to say yes," you pant. Your fingers are still working inside of you, stretching you in a way that is both satisfying and not nearly enough. It's driving you crazy.
What does that mean?
"We both know that if I bare my throat to you, you won't be able to resist ripping it out."
I would never hurt you unless you wanted it.
"I believe that you would never want to, but I see you, too. You couldn't help it.” Your hand slows, and you tilt your head as you consider your computer screen. “Could you?"
There's a moment of stillness from the chat box, and you briefly wonder if you've upset him, even though you know you're right. You know there's something about him that’s dangerous and predatory. He admitted as much himself. And it’s not like you feel the need to be overly careful or afraid of him. The thought doesn't bother you. You simply know that you can never tempt him by actually offering yourself up as helpless prey. Or he might just get a taste for it. 
Because you can love a predator as long as you never forget, for even a second, that it's still a predator—no matter how much it shows you its belly and loves you back.
You know all of that. Instinctively. Logically.
And yet.
You do so love being his favorite little prey.
"It doesn't scare me, David," you say quietly to break the silence.
No?
"No. Quite the opposite." You draw your fingers out of yourself to rub over your clit with a moan. "It intrigues me."
I know it does.
Why do you think I’ve done all of this? I knew, from the moment I saw you, that you could want what I am.
“And what are you, David?”
Darling, did you really think I would answer that question? Where's the fun in that?
“But I want to know.” Your fingers speed back up against your bundle of nerves. “I want to know everything about you.”
You will.
“And I want to know every secret you keep from the rest of the world.”
Don't worry, you’ll know me completely.
Eventually.
His words feel like a promise and a threat. You shiver with pleasure.
You shift down far enough in your chair to get a better angle. Then you bring your knees up and plant your feet wide against the edge of your desk. You know this has the added bonus of giving him an even better view of your opening. It also gives him a hint of what it might look like when you finally lay back and spread your legs for him.
"Can you see how wet I am?" You drag your fingers over your clit with a gasp. “Can you see how much I want you?”
Yes. I can see exactly how eager you are.
"Good. As you're stroking yourself, I want you to think about burying your cock right here.” You move your other hand between your thighs. Without hesitation, you plunge your fingers into your entrance again. Now you’re pleasuring your clit while also getting that enticing fullness you ache for, and it feels fucking incredible. The sight of both of your hands moving on your screen only adds to the indulgence.
As if I could think about anything else.
"I wish I was watching you right now instead of myself."
You want to watch me stroke my cock to you?
Your whole body shudders, and you bite your lip to stifle a whimper. "Yes! I want to watch the way your hand slides over your cock and how it throbs and twitches in your fist. I want to see what I do to you."
What you do to me…
You drive me insane. I've never needed to fuck someone like I need to fuck you.
"Jesus!" You wail as your hips jerk forward, and your knees start to shake. “David!”
That's right. I'm going to make you sob my name.
"If you keep talking like that, I'm not going to last long,” you pant.
Good. I want to see you let go for me.
“But I want you to enjoy this!”
You think I'm not enjoying this?
I finally got to see how responsive you are to my words and hear the sounds you make when you're like this. This is everything I wanted. Better, even. Now I can't imagine how much better it will be in person.
When you're full of my cock instead of your fingers.
“Fuck!” You’re driving those fingers in and out of your cunt with purpose now. You're no longer giving him a show. This is you feeling your orgasm closing in on you and scrambling for it, desperate and needy.
Fuck, that's good. Look at you. You're so god-damned beautiful as you fuck yourself for me.
"God, yes!" You gasp as you arch in your chair. "For you."
Only me. Only I can see you like this.
Say it.
"Only you, David."
That's my girl.
Now you're going to come for me.
“I'm so close,” you whine.
And I'm going to come as I imagine your tight little cunt.
“David,” you gasp, barely able to speak now through your ragged breathing. “Please.”
It's all I've been able to think about for months. It's going to feel so fucking good to finally get to fuck you and come with my cock buried inside of you. And I'm going to do it over and over again until I physically can't anymore.
Do you understand? I NEED you. Fuck!
“Yes,” you barely whisper. You're not even sure the microphone picked it up, but you have nothing more to give. The tension building inside of you is becoming nearly suffocating as you read every word. You feel you might drown in it before you ever find release.
As you continue seeking your own satisfaction, a photo pops up in the chat.
At the top of the photo, there’s the edge of a laptop keyboard, which is sat on top of a very ornate and expensive looking wooden desk. But that's not the point of the photo. No. That's not what strangles your breath in your throat or sets a flame in your chest that licks at your cheeks.
The polished surface of the desk is streaked and splattered with come. His come.
You imagine him standing in front of his computer, urgently stroking himself until he's shuddering out his orgasm and spending himself across the surface. All while his eyes never leave you on the screen.
You made him do that.
Your hand speeds up—the circles your fingers are rubbing over your clit are becoming almost brutal and painful, even as pleasure rakes up your belly and your whole body starts to tense. You're so close. So fucking close. You didn't know it was possible to balance on that edge for so long without falling in either direction.
You can't tear your eyes away from that ruined surface or get the thought of him fucking his own fist out of your head as you keep chasing oblivion and—
This is what you do to me.
Oh.
You bury your fingers into your cunt just as your walls clench down around them, and you come undone for the second time that day. To him.
You open your mouth to cry out, to wail his name as part of your release, but it gets choked to nothing more than a thought as your climax slams into you so hard that it knocks the wind out of you. You throw your head back from the force of it. As you try to ride each pulse of ecstasy out against your fingers, the muscles in your legs tense. Then you're involuntarily pushing against your desk with your feet.
The front two legs of the chair lift off the floor.
For a brief moment, your stomach lurches and you think you're going to topple backwards. Instead, you stay like that, hovering between stability and free fall, letting a wave of fear and adrenaline wash over you. Perhaps that should have ruined this, but the additional sensations only heighten and sharpen every breathless shudder until all of your nerve endings thrum. You’ve never felt so painfully, blissfully, alive.
Once you're fully spent, you carefully let the chair fall forward, returning to its proper position on all four legs. Then you bring one of your own legs down to plant a foot onto the carpet to ground yourself and stop that feeling of weightlessness still lingering within you.
God, you're stunning. The most exquisite thing I've ever seen. You were wonderful for me.
You sit there, bonelessly draped back in your seat, sweaty, your arms hanging at your sides, with your chest heaving as you struggle to catch your breath. And you try to smile for him anyway because, between his praise and your orgasm, you swear you’re glowing.
But you didn't scream my name.
You let out a breathless sound of protest. “Couldn't. I tried. Seeing what I do to you…it was too good, holy shit." You swallow hard and shift forward into a more comfortable position in the chair. "But I thought it, David. You were the only thing I knew while I came for you."
Mmmm, that's very good. But you're still going to do better next time. I’ll make sure of it.
"With you?" You ask hopefully.
With me.
FOR me.
Your face burns, and there's a weak twinge of arousal between your legs. Even though it's a mere shadow of what you’ve already experienced today, you’re amazed it's even possible after that.
…You still don't even know what he looks like, you think.
God, he's dangerous.
Won't you?
"Yes," you moan. "I promise I will scream your name until my voice gives out, as long as you're the one coaxing it out of me."
Yes you will.
You whimper. "When?"
Soon.
There are some things I need to take care of first. Then I will send for you.
Your heart begins to pound with nerves and anticipation. This is really happening. "How long?"
Only a few days.
A grunt of shock is ripped from your throat. "Days?!"
Now who's eager?
"I can't help it," you purr, softening at his teasing as you run your hand along your still trembling inner thigh. "I want to see you. And I want you inside of me."
You'll have that.
I'LL have that.
"How many days?" You're almost afraid to ask.
I'll have a car pick you up Monday evening.
There's a heavy drop of disappointment in your stomach. "That's three days…" 
Enough time to have all of my obligations done and taken care of. I want to be able to focus entirely on you once I have you. Like you deserve.
“But that's so long!” It's taking everything in you not to pout. You realize now you’ve been interpreting “soon” to mean you might finally get to see him, say, tomorrow. Or maybe even still tonight. It never occurred to you that it might be longer and that you’d have to wait for him.
I know, darling. I don't like it anymore than you do. And I would never make you wait if it wasn't important, but I have promises to keep.
“Alright,” you sigh. You find that you're, once again, reminding yourself that you're an adult. You can be patient.
And now that you're thinking about it, this gives you plenty of time to prepare as well. You don't have promises to keep, but you can certainly think of a few appointments you should make. When the time comes, you want everything to be perfect.
Besides, after that you’ll never have to wait again. Will you?
“No, David.” You lean forward as you stare into the camera. “Once I have you, I intend to never wait again. Because once I have you, you’re mine.”
That's my girl.
Later that night, when you go to sleep, you take your laptop with you and leave it open on your dresser, facing the bed. On your side table, you prop your phone up into its charging stand and make sure it's positioned just right as well. You want to give him two angles to enjoy this time. Then you sprawl out on top of your covers, still completely naked.
On your phone, you carefully type out, “I hope you didn't think the show was over. Because I still have more I can give you, and it would be such a shame to waste it. Enjoy, David. X”
As you hit send, you reach into the top drawer of your nightstand and pull out your vibrator. Then you settle back, and—with a desire that feels nearly insatiable now—you work several more orgasms from your clit while you gasp and moan and scream his name.
All while you know he's watching.
A/N: See? Who needs therapy when you have fanfiction?? 😌 (Christine please ignore the 🚩💕) I debated about whether or not to write a phone call with her mom, but I realized I don't actually want to give her a voice. Because this story isn't about her or even the reader's past. It's about healing from trauma, moving forward as the worst version of yourself, and falling in fucked up love with a stalker/serial killer. 😌
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