#do NOT recommend

[toshidou]

I had a Thought today I feel I need to share with everyone: it would be impossible to 69 with König.

18+ only, duh

That man is so insanely big. Once he'd have your thighs pinned to either side of his face, there's not a chance in hell you'd ever be able to get his cock anywhere near your lips, your torso splayed against his chest, fingers reaching down to curl around his shaft, to touch whatever skin your stretched arms will allow you. And the best part is, he wouldn't even notice that you're desperately trying to return the near blinding pleasure he's giving you, too absorbed in the way your folds glisten with a mixture of your arousal and his spit, lost in the little whines and pleas that fall from your lips at every swipe of his tongue.

Yes, I am very aware that this man has a massive dick, but even then it'd be torturously out of reach, twitching against his abdomen as if it was taunting you. And sure, in theory you could squirm and wriggle and try to manoeuvre you're way down his torso, but if you think for a fucking second that König is going to relinquish his hold on you, you'd be very, very wrong. No, this man's fingers would be gripping the flesh of your thighs so hard he'd leave bruises, perfect indents of his fingertips marked with splashes of green and purple that take weeks to fade. You'd be well and truly at his mercy, unable to do anything but lie atop his chest and take it, stuck between needing more, and craving the feeling of your lips stretched around his cock.

And if you thought that wasn't already overwhelming, he'd be moaning into your cunt as though he was the one getting head, the vibrations of his voice sending a series of shocks to your clit and up your spine with every word and whine uttered against your core.

"You taste like heaven, fürstin," followed by, "Ich kann nicht genug davon bekommen, I need you more, always more."

He'd only notice your struggles after tongue-fucking you through your third climax, when he feels your nails rake deep red lines into his torso, trying to claw your way down his chest, your eyes locked onto the deep maroon flush to his cockhead. Your desperation to pleasure him would be the only reason he'd release his grip on you just enough for you to get your lips wrapped around the tip; knowing that right now, he can make you feel good by letting you please him.

He definitely wouldn't be complaining, however, his head thrown back against the mattress as you languidly swirl your tongue around whatever you can fit in your mouth, large hands moving from your thighs to toy with your spit-soaked clit, if only to relish in the way you whine around him. He'd make sure you cum once more before he lets himself find his own release, your high keens translating to deliciously sinful pleasure from where his cock is buried past your lips, finally pushing him over the edge as he kicks up his hips and savours the way your throat spasms around him, greedily drinking down his seed despite the sudden intrusion.

But even after that, he still wouldn't be satiated. After all, his pleasure is tied directly to yours, so your legs will undoubtedly end up wrapped around his head once again, because the truth is, he can never get enough of you, and you're too good for him to ever deny the sanctuary you hold between quaking thighs.

[ejoym]

Based on backstory I wrote for Devlin a while ago. If you're curious you can read that previous post linked here. But honestly I assume most of you are like me and just prefer pretty pictures! But yes, a much younger and tattooless Devlin was pregnant once. It was an awful time. Daddy Bhaal used it as an opportunity to exert more control over her. The whole time she was very mean to Scel but I think he loved it so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[soupbitch-moneybitch]

you know what's so gd impressive about ofmd? like, maybe the most impressive part of the whole already very impressive show? how well-rounded the characters are for how little time they have to be on screen

i spent many years in the fandom of another ensemble cast show that had a million seasons and hour-long episodes, and maybe like, five of the characters were worth the time of day. ofmd, tho, not only has an incredibly quality core cast, but even the characters they introduce for five seconds manage to have depth and appeal

take ned low's crew for example. we have a bunch of people who take up maybe a third of the episode's screen time, but by the end, the script and acting are so good that you're rooting for them as they unionize and sail away to greater pastures

then you have characters that are great on their own, but also enhance the main characters in the span of like six seconds

evelyn? a godsend, 11/10, want her back, and she was the impetus for mary taking control back over her life. steak "steaky" knife? rip big man, we knew you for two minutes but loved you, and you gave us slight insight into izzy's history/influence on the republic of pirates. hornigold wasn't even really hornigold and yet we /still/ managed to get backstory about him and learn things that added context to how ed turned into blackbeard

honestly, the amount of talent it takes to be able to make almost every character on the screen someone who either 1. drives the plot forward somehow, 2. is just delightful and entertaining, or 3. is a combination of both, all within a space the size of a needle tip is fucking astonishing. as a professional writer i am horny for how well these mother fuckers hone their craft, and as a fan of the show i'm just extremely well-fed

i've said it before, but this is genuinely so much more than a gay little pirate show (although it is also that, and i love that about it). it has so much artistic depth and everyone involved has talent coming out every orifice. i am so glad i have the privilege of watching it. every part of it is so refreshing, i am genuinely in constant awe

[ieropilled]

frank. i quite literally cannot do this right now

[whumpster-dumpster]

Had a moment of self-realization as I was eating around the mold in my food that I was engaging in peak whumpee behavior. I sincerely apologize, I'm ashamed of myself for stooping to their level 😔

[gatoburr0]

Bro does not sleep.

[paarthursass]

The magic in your fingers sparks but your spells fail again and again - consumed by the sussur flower.

[theonewhowails]

in my head this is how Divine Inspiration works

[bellzsad]

tell me why last night i literally forgot my phone password and had to reset my entire phone

[houseofchronicpain]

Migraines are dumb. I really don't think anyone should have one.

[rxkuyo]

"Ahaha Daemon is so dumb for believing the old man is the one actively poisoning him when the weird goth witch giving him weird concoctions is right there."

May I introduce you to a beautiful concept known as sleep deprivation ? Man's only gotten poor quality sleep (if any at all) for weeks for all we know. Mood swings and paranoia are bound to go hand in hand with that one. Logical thinking ? Nope. Not happening. You add the fucking hallucinations further messing up his mind to the mix and you get exactly what we see.

[arctophyllax]

I’m doing an evil dark urge playthrough currently and I’m doing. Everything questionable and morally wrong. So I had to convince myself to betray Zevlor and I am NOT okay. I legit took an hour to process this and my ass just had to pick up his dead body because there’s no way I’m leaving him to rot…

Dark Urge obtained one weak spot.

Was constantly telling myself “it’s just a game it’s fine you didn’t actually betray him”

But then Zevlor said “you turned on us? Hells, why?” as if his “Gods above, you’re alive. A little light, just as the day seems darkest.” didn’t already ruin me because I knew what would happen.

HE SOUNDED SO HOPEFUL, SO GENUINELY HAPPY TO SEE ME ALIVE AND I JUST RIWSIEUWJWN

Safe to say this is my full on evil playthrough and this will BE IT and I’ll NEVER do it again. And I didn’t even end up recruiting Minthara, I killed her at camp

Larian, I rate this a 0/10 experience please let me recruit Zevlor instead of Minthara, she is unpleasant company and I will forever feel guilty about this fictional in-game murder I’ve committed.

[imdoingsortagay]

My gay ass watching the strap match and seeing Punks boner for some fucking reason

[bedlamsbard]

accomplished the impossible: got AT&T to give ME money after cancelling my service, because apparently one of the only ways to get them to prorate your bill is to move to South Dakota. I guess the logic is that since they don't serve South Dakota there's no possible way you can stick with them. even AT&T doesn't want to be here.

[sugaroto]

Μακαρόνια με σάλτσα και κοτομπουκιες γιατί φεύγω την τρίτη και θέλω να τελειώσω τα φαγητά. Ποιος Πετρετζίκης και βλακείες. Δείτε εδώ φοιτητική φαντασία

[citruslullabies]

chat someone on discord told me I'd look good pregnant.

how do I respond to that.

I JUST SAW THIS WHAT