#do I move to Europe
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Hi.
How did you get over your quarter life crisis?
Because I’m trying not to fall into the vast unyielding void. And I’m failing hilariously.
#TAG RANT. CAN IGNORE. YOON JUST NEEDS TO GET HER THOUGHTS OUT.#filler tag to push the rest of the rant down past the cut off point.#i literally don’t know what I’m going to do with my life and I can’t decide anything.#do I stay in flowers#do I leave flowers#do I try and get into film again#do I move to Europe#or delay that and go back to school for the one thing that’s always brought me pure happiness#or do I move out of my city#but in all of this I have to consider my partner and what he wants#but I don’t know what to do. i don’t know what the right thing for me is and I can’t afford a therapist so I ramble on the internet in hopes#of a shiny beacon of something rings into my head and figures everyhting out for me#like. I’ll be 25 in April. a ways off. but I’m 25 and I haven’t done anything. i don’t know what I’m supposed to do?? i had a life plan that#was derailed so hilariously hard by COVID that cannot be mended. and this is the first time I haven’t had a plan or a solid goal and so now#I’m floating in the middle of the pacific wondering which direction to turn in hopes of finding land#i have nothing to work towards and I miss who I was. i want to be that again. i wanna be her again. but it’s so difficult to do that.#anyway. rant over. needed to get that out. thanks for reading if you did.#this actually made me feel a lot better hope moly.
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really disappointing that bunjywunjy had to be pestered twice just to quietly remove their reblog after using their huge platform to encourage garbage like raving about the lesbian estonian soviet flag and how 'new pride flag just dropped' so people could go 'ooh pretty' about a flag that was forced onto us by ppl who wanted our culture gone and oppressed us for about a century in total if not more.
to say nothing or not show anything of the truth about that flag and quietly remove the reblog felt more like it was done out of obligation (and you didn't agree) rather than care for the subject matter that is still a fresh wound in our country's memory. it's only been 33 years since it ended.
I'd rather you make the mistake about something you didn't know (eastern european history is easy for westeners to overlook, because we're not a big country like them, we're not england or france or spain or germany) and admit/apologize for said mistake or even just outright state that you don't actually care rather than say nothing and quietly remove something so that people would stop talking about it
#regardless of your opinions on communism the ussr was a tragedy for much of eastern europe#and we still suffer under its effects today#did you know that when the ussr occupied us that estonians couldn't even be the majority of the population in our own country?#they flooded in and tried to make our country like them#they arrested anyone who wore the colors of our flag#and all while they settled into our countries (it wasnt just estonia but amywhere they occupied) they forcefully deported us out of it#into moving steel boxes of the trains in the harsh winter#people packed in like anchovies with barely any room to die from the starvation#but nobody talks about that#nobody cares about eastern europe#nobody bothers#so i get american tankies telling me garbage like how im just reciting 'CIA propaganda'#as if i give a fuck about what some yankoid organization in some unrelated country says#our families lived that shit#at the time i was born the only people who couldve gotten an estonian birth certificate were still children#what do you think our mothers and fathers and grandmothers and grandfathers lived in?#people only care that a flag looks pretty#and not what the flag actually meant
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do usamerican leftists think that if they don’t vote the government will spontaneously collapse to make way for their socialist utopia
#y’all gotta stop pissing me off#i’m a leftist too but things do not go our way very often#i empathize with your plight. i do not enjoy seeing democratic policy either#but i do not enjoy fascism even more#y’all are acting like the average american needs to be punished for the honor of palestinians#when both the average american AND palestinian would be harmed by a second trump presidency#fucking. whatever man. if you want your life to be worse go for it but#i regrettably live here and i don’t want that for me :)#and even when i move back to europe if america gets fucked up so will EVERY OTHER COUNTRY#so. yknow.#us politics#kamala harris#donald trump#2024 elections
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Intresting how its only trivializing and mocking green myths when non-greek white people do it, but not when non-greek poc do it. Its almost if you dont actually care
lmao bro what
i literally have zero clue what you're arguing here, "stop criticizing rachel for writing her greek myth retelling from a predominantly whitewashed westernized and christian-washed point view" ?? yeah okay lol
#i can't even tell what direction this strawman is trying to go in LOL#no one cares if you're white my guy#shit there are greek myth retellings that slap and are written by *gasp* non-greek white people!#if you write a story based on a culture that isn't your own just?? do your research ?? and don't write it like you hate it for existing???#some of y'all hurt yourselves in your own confusion as if it's such a chore to give a shit about the stories you're adapting lolol#“I didn't know greece has moved out from the west and europe” babe can you please point to me on a map where you think greece is#ama#ask me anything#anon ama#anon ask me anything
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the number of Americans who think they can just move to somewhere else - my social media feeds everywhere (except tumblr, but I’ve seen it here too) is flooded with Americans asking whether they qualify as citizens bc their great great grandpa was from [insert European country] or which area in Scotland has best weather or which southern European country has cheapest rent or how to get a marriage visa to a Nordic country
my dudes. you can’t. there’s no “I’ll just move elsewhere” about this. Europe generally speaking is hostile to immigrants even from within Europe. unfortunately for you, you will have to stay and keep voting and keep working to make your country a better place. I’m sorry it’s hard. it is what it is.
#I say this AS a European#who has moved around a fair bit within Europe#the UK is not the great safe haven you think it is#do you even realise how hostile the UK is to immigrants?#no you can’t get a visa to the UK if you’re a broke disabled queer person with only an American citizenship.#the UK wants rich people only#no you can’t marry a random Danish person and get a residency permit#you have to prove a real connection. and not in the arranged marriage fanfic way. in the way where you have to provide tangible proof#in the form of text messages and emails and letters and cohabitation and time spent together#a paper trail of a relationship#you think the United States alone are hostile to immigration? my friend. Europe is worse.#do you want to know how many American-European couples I know who couldn’t get visas for their spouses in Europe and went to USA instead?#ALL OF THEM
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A few days ago there was a whole discussion online in Brazil about how climate change anxiety was “a white person problem”. This is Brazil right now, as illegal fires were set in the countryside of the state of São Paulo.
The sun is red. The sun is fucking red. The state is literally burning. The city of São Paulo has an orange sky made by the toxic fog coming from the fires. Other states in the region (the one that I live, by the way) watched as this toxic fog came to our towns. Winds, a dense cloud of pollution, the air almost ashy. It’s toxic. The government isn’t doing anything to alert or prepare the citizens, the media is hiding everything because these were intentional fires set to support the agro business in Brazil.
I’m having problems breathing prior to these fires because of how the air is so dry in Brazil, caused by the intense pollution and deforestation/logging. It all got worse since this morning, as we watched the heavy grey clouds coming to us. There is literally no information in how to deal with this, and no punishment for the criminals - hilarious, until you think most of the powerful people in the agro business are also entangled with the media/government. “The agro is pop, the agro is tech, the agro is everything”, is what we spent decades listening on the tv, and now we are ripping the consequences of this shit. Ribeirão Preto, a city in the state of São Paulo, an “agro city”, is invisible under the fog. But the agro is pop, right?
My friend is waking up in the middle of the night not being able to breathe, I have friends having anxiety attacks over the consequences of this and I can assure you, this is not the first or last time this had happened. During Bolsonaro’s government, the agro did a “fire day”, where multiple fires were set in so many places that became almost impossible to track the people responsible for it or to get the fires out. The laws passed under Bolsonaro’s, and brazilian law since… ever, has a tricky way of letting these criminals away. We need harsher punishment, and Lula re-elected himself under a “green” campaign/government, holding hands with indigenous people as he rode up the Alvorada’s Palace. The indigenous people are the only community trying to protect us from this shit and the government used them, and continue to use them, to advance their political party while doing nothing when acts like these happens.
I’m so tired of this shit. Mere months ago a whole state in Brazil was under water because of the consequences of climate change. I’m so fucking exhausted of we labbing these problems/anxiety as “white people problem”. You say this in a third world country where we are eating shit from the consequences of first world countries who developed and continue to develop themselves by burning our Earth. The country should have stopped when Rio Grande do Sul was under water and the country should have stopped days ago when the fires started to spread.
I’m so tired and I’m so sad and I have no words. I hate it here. I really, truly hate it here.
#enfia o agro no meio do seu CU#brazil#brasil#and if someone tells me to move countries i will actually commit a hate crime#illegal fires#the agro is destroying this country#the agro destroyed the amazon#and no people the agro doesnt produce anything for brazilians#it’s all so they can export to foreign countries#we are burning brasil for the sake of exporting shit to fucking europe#all while brazilians are starving#and why does china needs so much soybean ANYWAY#in quote because it helps your green development???#your green development is killing my country you assholes#all of this to (and i’m not kidding) feed pigs#AND PRODUCE OIL#AAAAAAAAAASAS
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i like it when dogs are a little blonde like this who did your highlights little man
#lucky#dogblr#handsomedogs#residents#dogs#ok now. we are snowed in today!#i got a new job doing laboratory and pharmacy work instead of clinic#so i can recover from my major depressive episode lol#anyway doing ok so far! im learning to be a human again:)#lucky leia and i are saying hi :)#still dating my wonderful girlfriend#we are planning to move together to europe when shes done with her things and im done with mine :)soon
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damn i missed you guys this has to be the first time in weeks that i've posted more than like 5 things in a day. i can't waaait for actual bayern tomorrow
#the next 4-5 months will be a delicate balancing act#and i will probably be very sporadically present#but it's important to me that you all know that your friendships mean a lot to me and i feel unmoored from parts of myself#when i can't be present/talk to you all#like obviously number 1 my individual friendships matter a lot to me#and number 2 i do feel that being on here has allowed me to be in touch with the european side of myself#without actually having to move to europe#which i always used to think i would have to do if i ever wanted to connect with that#anyway on that note i am using 'how easy would it be for me to temporarily move to germany' as a criterion for picking internships lol#so expect to see me there in 3-4 years#bella things
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this is so entirely random but one thing i thing i wonder abt every once in a while is if there are any indigenous american emigrants like ones that have left the americas entirely. like indigenous americans in the uk or whatever. i dont even know of any hispanic mestizo british people���. i mean statistically im sure there has to be at least some of them right. however small the number. but ive like never seen or heard from them if they do exist… so i always wonder what that must be like. like how comparible is that to cultural diaspora in america. how much of your cultural identity do you keep with a community that small? and like the way that the majority of countries have at least some amount of black & east+south+west asian immigrants for the people to have exposure to even if not everywhere is as culturally diverse as america. but if youre british have you met all of those but just never met an indigenous american. or like any latin american. thats crazy to me
#i do know there are latinos in east asia japan esp but i feel like ive never seen them in europe#well besides like rich latina american influencer girls that move to italy and only speak english. thats not what i mean#i mean like actual communities and families earnestly emigrating and establishing themselves or whatever..#like i know theres some indigenous groups from other continents in the us. mostly from northern africa se asia and the pacific islands#but i guess in fairness i cant say i know of any aboriginal australians in america…#idk this mostly means nothing i have no point its just a shower thought i have sometimes#also i know theres a lot of black carribean immigrants in the uk but those are mostly from former british colonies right?
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bro there is smth abt the food in north america that fucks w my guts SO bad like there is literal nuclear warfare happening in my large intestine rn. like i be in the trenches rn chokin on my own damn gas
#sorry for oversharing but i have been having the RANKEST farts for the past week#just goddamn deadly#before i moved to europe i was convinced i had ibs. and then after i moved there all my symptoms disappeared and i was like. huh#so idk wtf they’re puttin in the food in canada but dear god my guts do not like it#dick punches
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It's still #PortfolioDay. Tere!! I'm Sven, an artist from Estonia. I have a BA in graphic art / printmaking. I draw comics, animation and design characters. I especially love drawing cats and guys with scruffy facial hair.
I primarily work with traditional mediums (ballpoint pen. who needs to erase anyway), but also have thorough knowledge in Adobe Photoshop, Illustrator, InDesign and Clip Studio Paint.
I draw inspiration from my own life experiences to make short comics about retail, LGBT+ topics, (specifically FtM transition) and Estonian working class life. I was born into poverty and negligence and had to work hard to keep up with everyone else and I don't want to romanticize it, but it made me resilient and independent at a very young age. Optimism and humor is what keeps me alive. Here's my Estonian Academy or Arts portfolio as a PDF! (EST 🇪🇪)
… I'm actually still on the poverty line and my day job is earning minimum wage in a grocery store. I'm open for character commission work as long as you're fine with sketches not thorough rendered works. The most I've charged is 30€, the least I've charged is 2-3€ for a tiny receipt sketch.
Payment through PayPal. Or if you're Estonian, you can also pay directly via internet bank actually? idk, let me know and I'll give my IBAN and name.
#art#portfolioday#transmasc#ftm#transmasc artist#starving artist#estonia#eesti#europe#comarket#comarket lives#I guess I can try commissions again#but.........I just sketch man#how do I make a commissions sheet instead of putting this in the tags#ohhhhh my god some of these had more image description but tumblr lost them so whatev#should I add that I'm a senior tumblr user who has been here for almost 10 years? on this hellsite?#it's like this site is eternally broken. now images get stuck and can't be moved#flickyart#university#mental health#depression#poverty#queer#those 3 things are what all my art is about tbh#olen kõver ja vaene ja mul on depressioon
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Dick and Tim playing Ticket to Ride… in my Mind Palace… my special inner world…
#Ticket to Ride Europe…#in my head…#tiny trains…#bonemeal says silly stuff#they would be SO competitive#they would be SO cutthroat and aggressive in their play styles#they would deduce where the other is going and play routes and stations on their own routes just so they can’t reach#I think they would love TTR#Tim always plays green and Dick plays blue#or maybe Tim plays red?#cause then Babs can play green#I have genuinely imagined several games of TTR with various character combos to see how their play styles change#hrrgnnn I need to play TTR RIGHT NOW#I have to wait for like 4 hours rn do you know how many games of TTR I can play in that time#time WASTED#dc#tim drake#dick grayson#I think when one of them makes a particularly evil move there’s a 40% chance to game turns into wrestling#until they knock over all the routes#oh TTR my best friend…#guys I kind of like TTR did you know
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i think what's really been getting to me the past few months is the realisation that i dont relate to literally any of the mental health stuff i see anywhere. like whenever there's some affirmation or motivation or just relatable-sounding posts in general they all seem like such common problems and it's like, damn i literally dont experience any of that. and yet im still crumpling. something uniquely wrong with me
#like ion have social anxiety and my depression manifests entirely differently. already excludes like 90% of things on here#also like. my parents grew up so poor immediately post ww2 and in the ussr that they#were eating dead animals off the street. my father was in a revolution when he was 10 and grew up working in a mine#and ion even wanna think abt the shit my mother endured in transylvania#and they both went to uni for over a decade and made an extremely good life for themselves#and i cant even do 2 yrs of uni without folding?? i dont even have anything else going on#i literally have everything handed to me why can't i just function#maybe i never learned how to struggle for things. i dont know#barking#and i cant say oh well im more mentally ill than them. first of all where do you think i got them from. second of#all they were in a war and spent the majority of their lives in the ussr. they wont even#talk about most of the things they went through#like dont get me wrong i have such a long list of mental issues my biography would count as the next dsm#but it's not like my parents were okay at any point. so like#for the record they stopped living in the ussr because the ussr ended they didn't move out or anything. we're still in eastern europe#which is definitely contributing to my overall state. please can i fucking leave pleeeease
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europe is so interesting. they treat me like a cute kid, backpacking across europe at age 21. the next second they ask me why i'm responsible for gun violence in the united states.
#it's just so irritating#after my first night out in barcelona i introduced myself as peruvian exclusively#bc fjweiaofjreaogehw#they care sm abt american ex-pats gentrifying lisbon#(which is a problem)#but they don't care about literally any of the other clear as fucking day problems in their continent#i introduced myself as american#(texan moving to californian)#and then asked for my opinions on anti-queer laws; pro-gun laws; and why i still 'support' the country#i just happen to live therefjewiaofjreioag#this one parisian thought that we never learned abt the renaissance like#how much do u wanna bet they never learned abt any usa renaissances (harlem; french language rebirth in louisiana; etc)#cw: gun violence mention#gun#gun mention#so at least now i know i can't live in europe long-term#dash rambles#tonight is a night to think abt my spain speed-run#and then move on to portugal where hopefully they understand me#if it weren't for the tourism (english-speakers) i would've been in trouble in barcelona bc catalan doesn't sound as spanish-y as it reads
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Why the FUCK are Southerners under the impression they're even welcomed on the internet ANYMORE????? Sorry but this is genuinely fucking rancid I feel fucking unsafe knowing that my spaces are being invaded by you fucking people. Fucking disgusting that it's 2024 and we can't hold piece of shit racists and Confederate nazis accountable for literal fucking war crimes and slavery anymore.
hey man. whats going on. this is such a weird thing to say to someone else on the internet life would be so beautiful if you stepped outside and talked to a real person for once. btw did you know the south is mostly full of poor people and black people and acting as if being from a place makes a person inherently a bigot is very weird almost as if it's pushing a classist narrative. Thats so wacky lol
#sorry i got this out on discord#but other parts of america love to pin ALLLL of their bigotry and crimes on the south. racism misogyny homophobia etc#so they dont have to reflect on themselves and do introspection as to what theyre doing wrong. bc make no mistake its rampant other places#<- europe does this with america too. lol. lmfao#but other places love to act like they're educating or modernizing or fixing the south when they just. want to turn it into where they#came from. when they move here and buy up all the cheap land and skyrocket prices and chop down huge swathes of forest#to build solar panels for 'eco friendly energy' despite THOUSANDS of acres of wood lost.#and its so weird that a lot of these attitudes about being better than them inherently and being lesser human beings are pushed in every ot#er area of the country. its almost as if its long rooted classism and racism#there are queer people living in the south. trans people. people of color. you cant just tell us all to leave to be redeemed#we deserve to live safe lives AND not have to leave behind everything we've ever known. what if we dont have the money??#but i guess you dont care abt that. lol. Lmfao#jamies bad posts#jamie answers asks#hate anon#jamies serious posts
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I haven't drawn anything for it and haven't written enough to post but it should be public knowledge how easy it is to make a childhood(preteen?) friends au with the twisted sisters
Oh Meredith spends all her time in the hospital her mother works? Well what if Cristina was in Seattle when she and her dad were in a car accident? What if when the ambulance finally arrived she was brought to Seattle Grace? And what if Meredith was hiding around in the ER trying to catch a glimpse of her mother working and ended up being awfully fascinated by the girl around her age who came in just now?
#itd a very fucked up childhood friends au#but like theyre just two traumatized kids who find solace in each other#cristinas not too hurt from the crash#scrapes bruises. they think maybe something's wrong with her head but its just a minor injury#maybe her shoulders dislocated (hehe)#shes. yk. not well#she wouldnt be like post plane crash with like completely catatonic except the violence#but i think shed be unresponsive#she doesnt fight the doctors trying to help her#but she doesnt like respond or anything#stares into the distrace#since she doesnt talk they cant get ahold of her mom for a bit#she spends some time in peds#idk how but meredith somehow makes her talk#uhm from there you can take it many places#does cristina move to seattle? do they grow up together? do they grow apart when meredith goes to europe?#do they then just happen to be in the same intern group?#or does cristina go back to beverly hills away from the person thats got her the most ever? maybe except her dad#and meredith is alone again#and then theyre both just there. remebering each other so clearly but the short friendship also feeling like a dream#or cristina just moves to seattle and everything is great forever#greys anatomy#twisted sisters#mertina#meredith grey#cristina yang#grey's anatomy#pzyii rants#my aus#greys anatomy rambles
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