#do I even want to tag fruitcake

[kubeesart]

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✎| Some more (ugly) Valentine Dandy’s World doodles!! Ft. Astro, Dandy (as the Rose Cupid), Shelly, Sprout and Vee (and Cosmo-ish)

✎| It’s a bit hard to read, the quality isn’t my favorite but it’s the best I can do right now fjfjfj

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✎ | Close-ups of the upper and lower half of the page!! Sorry for the messy writing and some stuff being cut off- ( ˊ̱˂˃ˋ̱ )

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[astonmartinii]

day eight: is it new years yet? | franco colapinto social media au

pairing: franco colapinto x fem albon!reader

christmas day has come and gone and lovers have the agonising wait until new years to reunite (ie complaining a lot)

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

francocolapinto

liked by olliebearman, alexalbon and 828,056 others

tagged: yourusername

francocolapinto: will someone bring my wife back from the war

view all comments

user1: i need this kind of man in my life please

user2: i just know he's wearing that shirt completely unironically

user3: i need him to wear it in the paddock please

alexalbon: "the war" being her family's home for christmas

francocolapinto: well yes! why would she want to spend time with YOU when she could spend time with ME

alexalbon: she's not being held hostage she can leave if she wants to

francocolapinto: you're using the pets to your advantage

francocolapinto: DISGUSTING

alexalbon: excuse me?

francocolapinto: free her! and let her bring stan too!

alexalbon: you know what? it's christmas so i won't be entertaining this absolute nonsense

francocolapinto: my love for your sister is not nonsense alex, i am hurt by these accusations

alexalbon: FUCK OFF

user4: oh alex and franco bickering you are so personal to me

user5: i don't know how i'm going to deal with franco not being on the grid next year

yourusername: trust and believe sis, he'll in that paddock no matter what

user6: thank you for your service queen

alexalbon: if you must i guess

yourusername: missing you more baby

francocolapinto: actually not possible

yourusername: you could always come here ...

francocolapinto: and miss out on the sun on christmas?

francocolapinto: and have to hang out with alex ????

alexalbon: i am SICK of you pretending i'm not an absolute hoot

francocolapinto: i'll agree this one time and that's only because you share genetics with y/n so i must assume you must have some of her qualities

alexalbon: what the hell, sure

yourusername

liked by landonorris, francocolapinto and 341,984 others

tagged: alexalbon

yourusername: is it new years yet?

view all comments

user9: personally if i had that many cute pets i would not be complaining about going home for christmas

user10: real

albon_pets: that's exactly our points !!

francocolapinto: but not as cute as franco!

user11: did you forget to log into your burner account?

francocolapinto: no i just have a very secure view of myself

yourusername: therapists are AFRAID of him

user12: have we considered they do miss each other but are really on a covert mission to subliminally force us to listen to sabrina carpenter's ep fruitcake

yourusername: it is a banger i will say that

alexalbon: our family are NOT ANNOYING THIS IS A LIE

alexalbon: the song is good tho

landonorris: speaking of sabrina carpenter, do you wanna try out some freaky positions while you're back in england @yourusername ?

francocolapinto: i will tear you limb from limb and then drag you around silverstone attached to my williams like cans from a wedding car

user13: that's so romantic 🥰

landonorris: MURDER IS ROMANTIC?

francocolapinto: stop flirting with my girlfriend or i will invent a crime worse than murder

landonorris: it's a JOKE ????

francocolapinto: i am not laughing.

yourusername: he's so protective hehehehe

landonorris: so you're willing to let franco murder your friend of over TEN YEARS ?

yourusername: he can do no wrong in my eyes

landonorris: ALEX?

alexalbon: firstly, you bought this upon yourself. secondly, franco actually got me a really cool christmas present so he is above you on my friendship pyramid now

francocolapinto: no one can resist franco xx

user14: this comment section is a fucking mess

user15: and i wouldn't change it for the world

francocolapinto: counting down the days xxx

yourusername: i'm so excited i can't stop talking about it

albon_pets: this is true, she's even talking to the cats about it

alexalbon

liked by georgerussell63, landonorris and 409,302 others

tagged: lilymunhe & yourusername

alexalbon: despite popular belief, my sister does actually love me (or she at least loves the animals)

view all comments

user16: they're such a cute lil family

user17: and with the introduction of franco's face card they will be unstoppable

georgerussell63: with the absolutely blasphemous speculation in these comment sections i would like to lodge a formal complaint concerning the fact that i have never been invited to an albon christmas

francocolapinto: not cute enough

georgerussell63: i can go toe to toe with you franco

yourusername: lying is a sin george

georgerussell63: what happened to the y/n i once knew ...

yourusername: listen george if you want the invite you gotta marry in to the family, and since both alex and i are taken it looks like your best bet is one of the cats

georgerussell63: that would be beastiality

yourusername: not my problem

alexalbon: please don't fuck one of my cats george

georgerussell63: SHUT UP !!! i merely wanted some recognition for my importance to the albon family but alas you are all IDIOTS. DID OUR HOMOEROTIC SHARED THROAT INFECTION MEAN NOTHING ALEX

alexalbon: i don't really know what you want me to say here?

user18: george has been off his rocker since qatar i fear

yourusername: it's been much longer than that lol

francocolapinto: she'll never love you more than she loves me

alexalbon: considering you two are in a romantic relationship i would hope so

yourusername: oh girlies we should get this all out now before franco gets here and before we camp out in the williams garage all season

alexalbon: i must ask do you have to be there all season?

yourusername: we're scheming

francocolapinto: james can't resist my puppy dog eyes for that long

yourusername: count your days @carlossainz55

carlossainz55: excuse me ??

francocolapinto: you heard her !!!

carlossainz55: @alexalbon is it going to be like this all season?

yourusername: not if we have anything to do with it

carlossainz55: so just for a few races

francocolapinto: no dipshit we're going to steal your seat

user19: i love when a couple really come together to maxmise their joint slay

francocolapinto

liked by yourusername, olliebearman and 823,019 others

francocolapinto: i hate the time warp between christmas and new years so much what do you mean i actually want to be playing trivial pursuit with alex :(

view all comments

user21: why does he have a bunny?

user22: it's best not to ask questions about franco really

user23: i want to know but also i think for my sanity it's best i don't

alexalbon: everyone goes on about the 'franco charm' but really it's all about the alex charisma

francocolapinto: whatever, you can have this one, but know you'll never truly be me

alexalbon: was the half compliment in the caption the yearly compliment for 2024

francocolapinto: yeah so savour it

alexalbon: you're so kind franco

francocolapinto: i know 🫶

alexalbon: i was being sarcastic

francocolapinto: compliment is a compliment

user24: franco is the type to be called pretty dumb and just hear pretty

user25: he wouldn't be wrong

yourusername: i've been holding down the fort while i can but this dumbass has clearly done some reading in his spare time

francocolapinto: no one is as smart as you amor i have no worries

user26: is this game of trivial pursuit lasting days?

landonorris: there is no way you're the trivial pursuit champion ???

yourusername: i've won for the last five years running, why wouldn't i be?

francocolapinto: choose your words carefully lando... i'll be on british soil before you know it

landonorris: why is it just me you're going after the whole twitch gc agree

charles_leclerc: not sure what you're on about here lando

georgerussell63: i've always been impressed by y/n's trivial pursuit skills

alexalbon: i love her so much i let her win

francocolapinto: @landnorris consider this a warning

landonorris: how did i end up with the threats again?

user27: franco does not play omg

yourusername: he's the biggest loverboy eva

yourusername

liked by georgerussell63, alexalbon and 603,029 others

tagged: francocolapinto & alexalbon

yourusername: reunited and it feels so good !

view all comments

user28: i have never felt jealousy like this

user29: hey siri play that should be me by justin bieber

user30: you're telling me i gotta live and people like y/n get to have an f1 driver brother AND franco colapinto as her new years kiss ???

francocolapinto: longest ten days of my LIFE

yourusername: you can't get rid of me now

francocolapinto: good! i need my fix of y/n :3

francocolapinto: i'm addicted to you

yourusername: you're addicted? they're tryna make me go to rehab

francocolapinto: but i said

yourusername: no

francocolapinto: no !

user31: are these motherfuckers quoting amy winehouse ???

alexalbon: worse, they're actually singing it to each other right now

user32: WHAT? show it to me rachel....

georgerussell63: wait he came to england ????

francocolapinto: yes! you're no longer the hottest f1 driver in the country - i'm so sorry!

georgerussell63: @alexalbon please tell me this little menace is not crashing your festivities?

alexalbon: well technically ... franco is family so he's got more of a right to an invite than you ...

francocolapinto: snooze you lose georgie boy

georgerussell63: you need better taste y/n

yourusername: wanna say that again

alexalbon: oh george ...

georgerussell63: you need better taste y/n

landonorris: oop.

yourusername: I DON'T CARE IF IT'S MEANT TO BE NEW YEAR NEW ME, IF YOU'RE NOT CAREFUL THERE WILL BE NO 2025 FOR YOU RUSSELL

francocolapinto: that's so fucking hot

yourusername: i love you <3

francocolapinto: i love you more

kimiantonelli: do i have a teammate for next year or?

fin.

note: amazing news!!! the vets found that my cat was too healthy to be put down so he lives to slay another day. hope you enjoy this celebratory franco fic, my first for him i think? (can you tell i need to update my masterlist?)

[rengineer]

— " Howdy, you're invited: A Very Private Smissmas Hideout! I hope this message finds y'all in good spirits (or at least not blowin' somethin' up at the moment). I reckon it’s been a tough year, so I thought we’d take a well-deserved break and celebrate the season together.I've gone and rented out a cozy little spot far from all the noise to host a private Smissmas hideout. It’s peaceful, got plenty of space, and even a fireplace or two. Bring something warm to wear, 'cause it's gonna be chilly! Date: 1st December 2024 — 31st December 2024 Dress Code: Festive (or whatever's comfy for ya) Now, the location… I'm keepin' it under wraps to keep things extra private. Attached to this message is a set of coordinates and instructions on how to get there.Trust me, y'all don't wanna miss this. There'll be good food, laughs, and maybe even a surprise or two. And yes, the BLU team's invited too — truce zone rules apply, no funny business. P.S. If anyone’s got dietary restrictions (or strong feelings ‘bout fruitcake), let me know! "

CONFIDENTIAL DOCUMENTS:

FOR PRIVATE EYES ONLY

Howdy, I'm Albedo, the guy running this blog, and this is my first time hosting a Christmas Event for the TF2 RP community. This event will be held on Tumblr. Here are a few things you need to know:

∫ GENERAL dx

This event is strictly for all TF2 RP-related blogs only, including fan teams, anons and TF2 OCs! Engie's gone ahead and set up sentries outside to keep unwanted guests at bay — so, if you're not on the guest list, don't bother tryin' to sneak in!

Strictly no NSFW RPs... If you want to get into that kind of content, do so in your own private servers.

Reblog this post with #( attending ) if you plan on joining the event. If you're just helping spread the word, feel free to tag it with #( sharing ).

DO NOT start threads off this post! However, during the event, you can start new threads that aren't related to the event itself. We want everyone to have fun, whether you're here for the event or just here to RP something else entirely.

This event is not compulsory. If you prefer to start threads on other topics, you absolutely can!

Please tag any event-related threads, posts, or starters with #REDSmissmas2k24.

Please refer to this Google Doc for more information! Please toggle print layout on Mobile or view it on Desktop. (Mobile version will be coming soon)

∫ DAILIES dx

Daily questions and drabbles will be shared on this account throughout December :) Participation in the event is not required to answer or engage with them — everyone is welcome!

That is all for now, please keep an eye out for any future updates! Any related quick-time events/starters will be posted on my blog :) If you have any questions, feel free to ask them.

[wwinterwitch]

buy me presents — joel miller

summary: you and your ex situationship reunite at a christmas party

pairing: joel miller x fem!reader

word count: 3.1K

tags: age gap (mid 40s and mid 20s), no outbreak, you fell hard and didn't know he fell harder bc he's an idiot!, miscommunication, angst, awkward reunion, everything gets fixed at the end tho don't worry, tommy is featured

note: i've been listening to fruitcake non-stop and i had this little idea that turned into an entire fic. it was kinda shitty at first but i decided to give it a try anyway

reblog or comment if you enjoy please!

all masterlists | pedro pascal masterlist

You always thought that going after older guys meant having absolutely no problems when it came to maturity and commitment. Guys your age are so good at playing games, keeping you guessing, too afraid to make it official.

So, evidently, when you met Joel at his workshop you were over the moon. He was charming, incredibly handsome and single. You still remember his attractive smile and the way he'd lean way too close to you, offering to fix the piece of furniture that you showed up with that day in exchange for a nice dinner and your phone number.

Everything looked good in the beginning. He was a true gentleman, so sincere and attentive, and you were foolish enough to believe he actually considered you special enough to pursue a relationship with you.

In your defense, he really tricked you. Showing you pictures of his daughter, taking you out on countless dates, interested to know as much of you as possible, texting non-stop...it was like a dream come true. After many terrible relationships with pathetic and insecure little boys, you found a wonderful man willing to give you exactly what you were craving.

But then everything changed after seeing each other for almost four months. Because he'd always get super defensive whenever you asked him why you always had to meet at your apartment and never at his house. Or why he refused to introduce you to his family. Or why he kept introducing you to people that happened to see the two of you together as 'a friend of his'.

Tired of this uncertainty, you decided to confront him. It was a very messy conversation. You asked what you were, he said he didn't know. You asked if he had any intentions of asking you to officially be his girlfriend, he said he probably wouldn't. You cried, he didn't know what to do about it.

You kicked him out of your apartment that day and that was the last time you ever heard of him. No texts, no calls, no one waiting outside your apartment or showing up at your work with a well-deserved apology.

Were you just stupid for thinking he was into you the way you were into him? Did you get your hopes too high a little too soon? Was there something wrong with you? Were you overreacting?

Yes, no, whatever– you wanted someone to go all the way with you, thought it was Joel, and he turned out to be like every other guy you've met. It sucks, but you gotta move on. You've dealt with a lot of shitty men to know better than to suffer for one.

The heartbreak Joel caused soon turned into a mixture of disappointment and annoyance before it turned into nothing but an unpleasant memory. Soon enough, Joel Miller was out of your mind, and you were more than ready to jump right in into the dating world again. Maybe it was pathetic, but you still refused to lose hope that the right guy will show up in your life and change things for the better.

You kept your options open for a while, not wanting to immediately rush into something like you did with Joel. If any of these guys you're seeing want to keep you to themselves, they'll have to put that extra effort. You're just tired of always chasing after them.

A whole month went by and you never heard from Joel again, which was completely fine by you. He doesn't even cross your mind at this point. He's probably spending all his hours at his workshop, keeping his nights free for his no-commitment dates. And probably getting ready for the holiday season too.

Christmas has always been your favorite holiday. There's something about it that cheers you up like no other festivity. Maybe it's the decor, the food, the fact that it's everywhere you look...it's always been a magical time.

You also love the parties and gatherings around this time of year, so you immediately agreed to be someone's date to one of them. You met this guy a few weeks ago– three years older than you, tall, dreamy eyes and great in bed. There was no reason as to why the two of you couldn't have a good time at this little party...or so you thought.

He casually mentions who's hosting on the way there. A friend from work, he said while offering you a hand to help you out of his car. His good ol' buddy Tommy Miller.

Your smile practically drops at the mention of that name, immediately going back to that date at the bowling alley. Joel bought a large portion of nachos to share after you completely beat his ass at bowling (he totally let you win, he said), remembering the way he talked about a brother named Tommy.

But...surely this is all a coincidence. The universe couldn't possibly hate you that much, right? At one point you almost thought you were crazy for even thinking of the possibility of this friend being the brother. There has to be a million Tommy Millers out there. It's such a common name!

What are the odds of this actually happening? That you're really going to Joel Miller's brother's Christmas party? And even if you are, that doesn't guarantee that you'll see Joel there.

And why should you care? You haven't spoken in so long, he probably doesn't even think about you when he hears something that could potentially relate to you. He doesn't think about the chances of reuniting with you for longer than a second. He surely doesn't think about you at all! You should give him the same treatment.

Holding onto your date's arm, you walked inside the impeccably decorated apartment. Red and white everywhere you look, with a large table filled with various snacks, a lit fireplace that gives the room a much cozier look, and a Christmas tree standing tall on one of the corners of the living room.

Tommy Miller was at the entrance greeting the two of you and enthusiastically introducing himself to you. Nerves were starting to overtake you because shit, there's definitely some resemblance.

Still, you tried to ignore your racing mind, wanting to have a good time with this great guy who's glad to keep you close to him, introducing you to all his friends in a manner someone should introduce their date. You feel important next to him, like he's really trying to show you off. Something Joel failed to do.

Eventually, you were able to relax when you got to meet everyone at the apartment and realized Joel wasn't there. With a beer in hand and a polite smile on your face, you joined a conversation by the fireplace, talking amicably and genuinely thinking the night was safe.

That is, until you heard the doorbell.

You watched Tommy walking towards the door, immediately opening his arms wide to receive whoever just arrived. When the stranger leans forward for the hug Tommy was offering, your smile completely fades when you notice it was none other than Joel.

He walks inside the apartment and leaves his jacket hanging by the door, taking a quick look around. You immediately turn around, not wanting him to recognize you– yes, it was stupid because he'll sooner or later notice your presence, but maybe you can avoid the awkward encounter for a few more seconds.

It takes everything in you not to turn around again, putting your hand on your date's back as you lean closer to him, trying to seek any kind of comfort you possibly could. He immediately wraps his arm around your waist, inevitably making you smile. God, this guy really knows how to treat you exactly the way you want it.

Unfortunately, Joel reaches the group of people you were talking to. He starts greeting everyone until his eyes land on you, standing there completely speechless for a few seconds before a smile appears on his face.

He leans forward for a quick kiss on the cheek as a way to greet you, and you barely move away from your date to return the greeting, moving back immediately to refugee on the guy's side.

"You two know each other?" your date asks. You almost wanted to kill him.

You stay quiet, deciding to leave Joel the responsibility to answer. It's genuinely intriguing to see what he has to say.

"Uh, yeah..." he starts, clearing his throat. "I think...you took a coffee table to my workshop for a repair?"

Wow. Glad to see things haven't changed in the slightest! Of course you two just met each other for a little repair. Of-fucking-course! It's not like he woke up completely naked next to you on your bed more times than you'd like to admit out loud.

"Yes. Exactly," you faked a smile, agreeing with his statement.

That was pretty much the only thing you said to each other. After greeting everyone he quickly joined a completely different group to talk to (because it's obvious he couldn't handle being close to you for much longer). You actually appreciated that, making the task of ignoring him until you left that apartment just that much easier.

Things went downhill when your date had to go to the bathroom and you decided to get another beer from the kitchen. You didn't notice Joel following you, and by the time you did realize, he was standing in front of the exit, blocking it entirely.

"Oh, hey, workshop guy!" you greeted with fake enthusiasm, sarcasm dripping from your words.

You hear Joel sigh, and as if that didn't piss you off enough he decided to open his mouth. "Yeah, I figured you'd get upset."

"Then why did you say it?"

He raised a brow. "What, you wanted me to tell everyone– your date included, that we were seeing each other like a month ago?"

The kitchen was completely silent after that. Perhaps he had a point there, but it was impossible to deny you were still hurt by the way things ended and how poorly he treated you, so that last thing you'd ever do is admit he's right.

"I thought perhaps now that it's done, you wouldn't care about keeping it a secret anymore," you shrugged defensively.

He smiles softly, seeing right through you. "Perhaps I've just never been the type to kiss and tell."

Again, you didn't have much to say, so you just scoffed. "Whatever."

Much to your irritation, he laughs. A low, deep chuckle escapes him before he's looking at you up and down. "You look good."

"I know."

Another chuckle. "Of course you do," he sighs, the smirk on his face fading. "You always look fucking incredible."

You stand there like a complete fool, taken by surprise when you hear him say that. It sounds so...defeated? Is that even a thing? As you try to come up with an answer to that, you just look back at him with a lost expression.

"Is there a point to this conversation?" you eventually ask.

Now it's him who's looking back at you in complete silence. Unfortunately, you know him enough to know there's something in his mind and he's not telling you anything about it. He's hesitating, doubting, the engines in his brain moving faster than ever.

For a moment, you thought he'd say whatever random bullshit he can come up with in that very moment and be done with it. And you'd roll your eyes because you know that's not what he wanted to say, right before moving him away from the door so you can go back to the party.

But in a surprising turn of events, he doesn't do that. He looks at you with nothing but honesty, and you even catch the smallest glimpses of hope when he speaks. "Yeah," he answers your question. "I've missed you like crazy."

If you were speechless before, it's almost impossible to even remember how words work right now. Never in a million years would you've expected Joel Miller to confess he misses you. Not when it was you who was always trying to arrange dates. Not when it was always you the one remaining him you really liked him and him barely saying anything back.

Maybe he just needed a wake up call? Had to live that 'you don't know what you've got until it's gone' type of situation to realize how he feels?

Your heart beats faster as you process his words. He's missed you like crazy.

Still, despite feeling so fuzzy inside, you show none of it on the outside. "No," you promptly warn him. "No, no. We're not doing that."

"What?"

"That, Joel!" you exclaim, frustrated. "You can't break my heart and then say shit like that when we happen to meet by accident."

"Is it an accident?" he asks shortly after.

You chuckle sarcastically. "Oh, so is this some Christmas miracle? The festive season brought us together because of some nonsensical fate-thingy that's written up there in the stars?"

Joel looks slightly embarrassed, letting out another frustrated sigh. Before he can answer, you hear footsteps down the hall that leads to the kitchen so the two of you stay completely silent and turn around to see who it was.��

"Hey...oh," Tommy says, his initial smile fading when he notices the tension between the two of you. He quickly raises both of his hands in the air as he walks towards the fridge to grab two beers. "Don't mind me, I just wanted to grab these," he quickly explains.

When he turns back around, he immediately focuses on his brother. At first he looked very confused, like silently trying to ask him what the hell is going on, a small smirk appearing on his face just seconds later. Without another word, he quickly makes his way outside the kitchen to give the two of you much needed privacy. You could feel your cheeks heating up after witnessing that little exchange.

Focusing back on you, Joel decides to continue the conversation. "Okay, if you put it like that of course it sounds silly..." he mutters, scratching the back of his neck. "But, I don't know, I’d like to think something out there wanted us to meet again so I could make it right."

"No," you repeat. "You had a chance to make it right as soon as I kicked you out of my apartment. There was a chance to pick up your phone and give me a call or send me a text or...anything, Joel– fucking anything!"

There's a brief pause, and you're so glad to see he has nothing to say because boy, oh boy did you have things to say.

"You don't get to come back a month later and claim to miss me when you didn't even try to get me back. And you were a real piece of shit with me, by the way. You really made me think we had something special, just to treat me like it was nothing," you continue, visibly upset by the incredibly uncomfortable and difficult situation he's putting you in. "You made me feel...you made me feel like I was some stupid little girl you only wanted to get into bed with."

He looks absolutely horrified by your last statement, taking a few steps forward until he's standing right in front of you. The proximity makes it so much worse, forcing you to look down at your shoes. He gently grabs your chin to force you to look into his eyes, and for some reason you allow it. Maybe you were vulnerable, maybe you wanted to feel his touch. Maybe both.

"I promise you, that was not my intention at all," he immediately assures you in the most serious voice you've ever heard coming from him. "It was never just that. I was really falling for you."

You frowned, feeling so incredibly confused and frustrated. "Then why did you never show it?"

"Because I was dumb and I was scared," he reveals simply. It surprises you how honest he's being, how you don't have to ask more to get information out of him. "You were the first woman I started developing actual feelings for after my divorce, and at the time I thought things were moving too fast between us and...I didn't know how to handle it."

Joel can tell you're still not having none of it, so he decides to continue. "I really wanted to be with you officially, but I guess my insecurities got the best of me. I'm just an old man and you're gorgeous, and young, and...Jesus Christ, darling, you're the most amazing person I've ever met," he sighs again, hoping you'd understand what was going on in his head when he made the terrible decision of letting you go. "I didn't want to fuck it up or get my heart broken again...but I totally did fuck it up, and the worse thing is that I broke your heart in the process. I'll forever be sorry for that."

You were speechless yet again, and Joel didn't know how to take that. Are you going to say something nice or are you going to yell at him and tell him to go fuck himself? The uncertainty was eating him alive at this point.

Eventually, you speak up. "You did fuck it up," you agree. "Like, big time."

He sighs yet again, nodding. "Yes, I did. And I know I don't deserve it, but I'd like to have a second chance to prove to you just how much I care about you," he continues, not giving up this time. He couldn't live with himself if he managed to lose you twice. "To give you all that you deserve, to be there for you, to show the world how happy I am that you're my girl...I'd make it right."

Letting go of your chin, he moves his hand to the side of your face, anxiously waiting for an answer. The fact that you're not pushing him away is already a good sign, because he knows you're capable of throwing a beer bottle at him for saying what he just said.

You considered your options. There's a guy outside in the living room waiting for you. There's a bunch of other guys on your phone that'd run to your doorstep if you give them the chance. All of them have behaved better than Joel...but you can't fool yourself.

Even if you combine all of them, there's no way that everything you've shared with them can come close to what you experienced with Joel. You've never liked anyone so much before, and holy shit how badly you've missed him.

If he thought your proximity was a good sign, the soft smile that appears on your face makes him relax considerably, almost wanting to pull you in for a hug and start thanking you already.

"I guess you can take me out to dinner or something to prove you're sorry," you eventually reply, making him grin from ear to ear. You notice he's leaning even closer with the intention of kissing you, but you quickly stop him. "Don't even think about it. You'll have to earn the right to do that."

Joel silently agrees to that arrangement, immediately taking a step back from you, the smile on his face never disappearing. He doesn't care that you're not kissing him right now, not when you agreed to give him a chance. That's more than enough for him. The best Christmas gift he could've ever received.

[hausofmingi]

his good girl - chapter 1

pairing: song mini x stripper!reader

tags: stripper au, smut series

warnings: slight mentions of stalker, bad words (tee hee), dom!mingi, sub!reader, riding, daddydom!mingi, finger sucking, being carried and getting fucked, a bit of physical roughness (reader receiving), degradation but also praise, cum eating (off the floor!), aftercare

wc: 3.8 k

an: so I decided to give the reader a name because that feels more realistic to me as a reader than y/n. I find that sometimes reading "y/n" takes me out of it a little, so lmk if you find this helpful as well! Also, I am a little depraved so right off the bat, this gets very crazy kinky

minors dni!! 18+ only!!

“Where is the red garter belt I let you borrow?” You are racing around your and Lina’s small apartment, trying to prepare for yet another night on the job. 

“I don’t know, I may have left it at the club?” Lina answers from the bathroom. 

Red is his favorite. You don’t want to disappoint. 

“Well great Lina thanks for that, I’m never letting you borrow my shit again.” 

“Love you too!” she calls after you as you leave to go shopping. It’s not like you’re against making another trip to get some new pieces, but why do you always make the same mistake in letting Lina borrow your favorite stuff…

Your’s and Lina’s apartment is in a pretty run down building in an unsafe part of Gangnam, but no matter how shitty it is, its yours and you really want it to feel like home. 

But, that doesn’t mean you don’t feel the pair of eyes watching you as you exit out of your apartment building and walk towards the bus stop. 

You have been noticing that lately, the feeling that someone is watching you. When you leave your house, when you’re at the grocery store, while you’re going on a run. You try and brush it off because this is normal for women and all that, but today, you pay just a little harder attention. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you see a figure in a black hood (Jacket? Coat? You don’t want to look too hard) standing across the street from your apartment building. You walk a little faster to the bus stop just in case. 

That night, after spending more than you should on new lingerie sets, you and Lina are about to take the stage for your first stage set. It’s almost midnight, which is usually the time he makes his appearance. 

You always get butterflies, but not the stage fright normal kind of butterflies, the kind that make your clit perk up and your nipples harden. 

Why do you always get so worked up over a man who hasn’t even fucked you?, you think as you make your way up to the stage. 

You really have become quite the pro at this. After 4 years of working for this club, your boss has dubbed you his favorite girl. Doyeon always protects you and gives you the most popular customers, knowing you will always keep them coming back. 

You always thought it felt nice to be appreciated, especially knowing he didn’t have any intentions of coming onto you, on account of he’s a flaming fruitcake.

Its a good ways into your set, and his table still sits empty. You feel the sweat start to form on your back, but try to stay in your routine. 

Why isn’t he here? Where could he be instead? Did his company find out he was doing this? 

You always got scared that it might be leaked that idols come here, knowing the sasaengs stalker habits. Mingi, being a part of one of the biggest Korean boy groups, Ateez, must have a large number of crazy fans following him. 

Did they find out and tip the press to show up here? You didn’t see anyone outside though… Your mind runs rampant with all of the reasons that it could possibly be as you walk off stage and collect your tips from the stage manager. 

Tears start to threaten to spill, and you think you are crazy yet again to be this affected by a man you haven’t even had a conversation with. 

On the way home, Lina can tell you’re bothered and nudges your side as you walk home. 

“So you know how Taehyun has been requesting me a lot? Well he mentioned his upcoming tour tonight, I think he might finally take me along with them!” She exclaimed excitedly. 

“Don’t be ridiculous, he’s just saying that so you’ll suck him off some more.” you say. 

“Well damn… What’s got you all worked up honey?” She always called you honey when she was trying to comfort you. 

“Mingi didn’t come tonight..” you admit. 

“On a Thursday? That’s… super out of character. Well don’t worry, I’m sure practice just went long or he has an early morning schedule or….” her talking trails off as you dissociate. 

Lina has always been a nice friend, agreeing to move in with you without knowing you very well, trying her best to always cheer you up. It’s not her fault you felt like you guys were never really close. You give her props for trying though. 

You pull out your phone and check his bubble and instagram, seeing if maybe they could give you some clues. Nothing. 

You fall asleep that night thinking of the last time his fingers swiped your lip, hoping it wasn’t the last.

—

The next night at the club is gloomy. Even though it’s a Friday, attendance is lower and your energy is even lower. 

The feeling of someone watching you has been bothering you all day, but the guy in the hood has yet to make an appearance. You are just looking forward to curling up in your bed tonight and continually refreshing Mingi’s bubble messages. 

The stage manager calls for everyone to get onstage for the final number and the other girls rush out. You take your time though, not feeling like getting in a rush for this menial thing. 

You hang your head in your hands, covering your eyes and taking a breath. Just get through it, he’s just a man, you try to remind yourself. 

A smell reaches you, like a really expensive cologne. Musky and masculine, and somehow… dominant. 

You look up and standing in the doorway is him. He stands as if he owns the place, hands in his pocket, opting for a fitted vest tonight in lieu of a jacket. 

And he’s staring you down, studying you intently. If it was anyone else, you would feel the need to cover yourself and apologize. But not with him. 

You probably look like a dumbass, staring at him through the mirror with your mouth slightly open. 

He speaks first. “You were worried.” It’s a question but he doesn’t need an answer. 

“Yes,” is all you can manage to squeak out. 

He leans against the doorway, messing with his shirt cuff. You still haven’t moved, frozen in place. How did he get in here, past the security guard? How did he know which dressing room you were in? Was he the person in the hood you noticed this morning? He must be stalking you… Why doesn’t that bother you more? 

He notices your anxiety moving through you. “Don’t worry, I just know the security guard. He owed me a favor. I’m not a stalker” he responds, as if he read your mind.

“That’s… good” you say. 

He drops his arms and strides towards you, slowly as to not spook you. “Well thank you for worrying about me. I’m okay, for now. But, here’s the problem my love,” he draws his finger up your arm, making your hair stand up and bumps form. “You may be in trouble.” 

You aren’t sure what he means. “What kind of trouble?” you ask. “Like legal trouble?” 

You are afraid that maybe one of the idols ratted this place out and the feds are going to come knocking down your door and take you all away. Would Mingi still visit you in jail? Surely not, there’s no lap dances there… 

He sticks his finger under your chin and pushes it up to make you look at him. Drip. 

“Please stop letting your mind get ahead of you, baby. Let daddy speak.” DRIP. 

“A sasaeng has been getting very close to you. Too close. I can’t let you get hurt.” Awe, he wants to protect you. DRIP DRIP DRIPPING. 

“How did they find me?” you ask. 

He leans against the counter as he continues, “I am not sure, I don’t even know how much they know. Sasaengs are insane people with insane complexes. This one has been stalking me since pre-debut. But I’ve always been careful that she doesn’t see me come in here. So how she knows that you are important to me, I don’t know…” IMPORTANT TO HIM??? 

Okay you’ll have to throw these underwear out at this point. 

“So what do I need to do then? To protect myself I mean” you ask him. 

“Nothing, I want you to do absolutely nothing and let me handle it. But in the meantime, you can’t go back to your apartment.” 

Hate to say it, but fine by you. Maybe you’ll save some money by not having to replace your stolen shit anymore.

“Where will I go instead?” you ask. 

“You’ll come stay with me.” Jesus Christ, 20 year old you would be freaking the fuck out. But, it doesn’t make you freak out, in that way at least. 

“What about Lina, what about my job? I can’t live with you, much less San and Seonghwa. I’ll never see you. What if you have to travel for schedules? I’m just supposed to stay in your dorm 24/7? I have a life! I barely even know you! You only ever say 4 words to me, and then fucking leave me in a puddle, how can I just-” 

His hand stroking the side of your cheek cuts you off. “Again with the mind racing, baby. I don’t want you to uproot your life, it will be temporary. I have my own apartment now too, so we won’t be with other members. It will only be until we are 100% sure you are safe to be alone. I will take care of you, I promise.” he reassures. 

You lean into the hand that holds your head, a few tears falling into it. You finally get the courage to look up at him, making eye contact. He has dropped his heavy, dominant demeanor. Instead, his eyes hold only comfort and concern. 

Maybe he wasn’t kidding; maybe you really are important to him. 

After a minute of silence, “Okay, so what do I need to do right now?” you ask.

“Change and pack up your stuff, we are going to the apartment. Make a list of what all you need from your apartment when we get home and I will send a staff to collect it all in the morning.” 

“And take a breath, princess.” You unclench your jaw, which you didn’t even realize was clenched. He kisses your forehead before reaching down to grab your duffle bag that you carry your things in. 

You think in silence as you pack. Take a breath he says… he will protect me he says… Why me? Why is protecting me, a stripper, just some stripper that he barely speaks to. He doesn’t even know my real name…

“Yes I do,” he says from the chair he has sat down in to wait for you. Oops, you must’ve said that part outloud. 

“It’s Cora.” You like the way he flips the “r” of your American name with his Korean accent. 

“How do you know that?” he ignores you. “How do you know I used to live with San and Seonghwa?” “Touche…” you respond.

“All done?” he asks. You nod. He crosses to you and starts stroking your arms to comfort you. 

“I want you to remember though, you still have to be a good girl for me at the apartment, can you do that?” 

You look up at him through your eyelashes, surprised that he still is holding this up even at a time like this. Is it all an act, or is it truly how he is? Either way, you are turned on once again. 

“Yes..” you respond. He cocks his eyebrow, questioning your answer. 

“Yes what?” 

“Yes… daddy.”

“There’s my good girl.”

With his hand on your back, he guides you out of the dressing room and out the back door, where a black hatchback with tinted windows is waiting. He holds open the door for you, and helps you into the car. If only other men treated all their strippers like this…

The car ride home (whatever home means at the moment) is very silent. He has his hand on your thigh the entire way, the other staying steady on the wheel. His thumb rubs back and forth, another attempt at comfort you’re guessing. It works, sort of. 

Just smelling him and being near him your body is relaxed, knowing he will take care of you and wanting to give yourself to him. It’s like you are under his spell, which is crazy. You are usually so independent and self-sufficient. What about him makes you want to grant his every wish? 

“Shouldn’t you be blindfolding me, so I won’t know where your apartment is and so I won’t run away and all that?” you ask, kind of joking. 

“You won’t” he says while keeping his eyes on the road, fully confident in his answer. 

He’s probably right. 

–

Finally you reach the apartment. You almost drifted off to sleep, even though the drive was only about 20 minutes. He parks right outside the front door of the building and gets out to open your door for you. He offers his hand to help you out of the car. It’s much appreciated because you are still in your platform heels, just throwing a coat over your outfit you were going to wear to perform in. 

He keeps his hand on your back as you walk up to the doors, through the lobby, and up the elevator. It’s a really nice building with a concierge and fresh flowers all over. Sometimes you forget how big Ateez really is, and figure that Mingi bought this place with his own money. 

You wonder if he has neighbors on his floor. Do they know he lives next to them? Does he talk to his neighbors at all? Do they know that he is having his own personal stripper move in with him?

They’re gonna know now, from how loud you are being. 

How you ended up riding him in his dining room chair about 15 minutes later, you’re not so sure. 

—

He was going slow, too slow, slow enough that you could feel every. single. inch. 

You tried to grind your hips and get him in deeper, but the tight hold he had on your asscheek lets you know that even though you are on top, you are not in control. 

His other hand is holding your face, his thumb hooked in your mouth. You suck and gag on it as much as you can, but it’s hard to focus when he is going this slow. 

You felt high, things were getting foggy. All you knew is that you wanted to please him. 

“My beautiful girl, doing so well. You were waiting for this for a long time weren’t you?” his deep voice sends sparks to your clit and makes you even wetter, if that’s even possible. 

You can only close your eyes and nod. You want to throw your head back, but his hand on your cheek and thumb in your mouth keeps it facing forward. “Now baby, what did I say? Eyes. on. me.” 

He jerks your head a bit, just to make you a little scared. 

You know he would never hurt you. 

Unless you asked. 

You open your eyes like a good girl. How could you not be a good girl for him? 

His breath catches when you make eye contact with him again. His eyes bare into your soul, never breaking. 

You whimper a little when the head of his cock catches someplace you have never felt before. He smirks, knowing. He hits it again, making the upper half of your body keen forward, his thumb slipping out of your mouth. 

Your hands, which were bracing on the back of the chair, move down to his pecs. You are desperate for him, desperate for that feeling that release you dreamt about him giving you. 

You start to bounce since he let go of you, letting his arms hang down and his head fall back in pleasure. You are doing that to him. You are making him let go. 

You grind his cockhead up against your g-spot over and over again, drooling down his neck. 

You wish you could see what you guys look like, his giant body draped over the chair in ecstasy, you sat on his thick thighs bouncing on his perfect cock, licking up and down his neck. 

You’re close, really close, and your walls start to constrict down on his cock. His eyes shoot open and he jerks his head up at the feeling. 

“Hold on princess,” he practically growls at you. 

Hold onto what? You think. 

He grabs underneath your thighs, holding his hands behind your back and lifts the both of you out of the chair with him still inside of you. 

Oh my god, holy shit. 

This was too good, you couldn’t have even dreamt this up. 

You wrap your hands around his neck and he pummels into you as fast as he can, hitting your g-spot every single time as if he has memorized the angle. The sound of his balls hitting your ass covers your cries of his name. 

“Fucking. Take it.” he says, his forehead touching yours. He has essentially lost control of his body, just bouncing you wildly up and down his cock. 

It’s coming, It’s coming. Please, please, please, “please.” You don’t even know what you’re begging for, if you’re even talking out loud. You feel like you are losing your grip on reality, its so so close. 

He stills inside of you, leaving his cock right on the spot you need the most. He just shallowly thrusts, just rubbing your g-spot with his cockhead. Holy shit, it feels like fucking heaven. 

“Now,” he commands. 

And you obey. 

You flutter around him, feeling how his shallow thrusts stutter when you cum. You don’t stop for at least a full minute. 

“Thank you thank you thank you, oh fuck, thank you daddy” is all you can say as your clit jumps in ecstasy. 

His eyebrows are furrowed together, he’s close too. Right as your orgasm tapers out, you tighten your thighs around him and give him 3 bounces. That’s all he needs. 

He pulls you off of him just as he’s cumming, holding you away from him so you can watch the cum drip out of his cock and onto the floor. It’s so beautiful, you think. 

He sets your legs down on the floor, but they can’t hold you up and you fall to your knees. You can barely see straight, and you can’t catch your breath. Holy shit he may really have fucked the shit out of you. 

You keep your eyes turned to the ground while you try and slow your heart, but you see him start to squat down to your level. He picks up your chin with his hand to look up at him. “Baby… you need to clean up your mess.” 

“Wh..What?” you stutter. 

He stands up straight again, looming over you with his giant presence. “Clean it up.” his gaze falls to the ground and yours follows. 

Oh… you get it now. 

Not breaking eye contact, you lean your head down. You stick out your tongue and lick up the cum that he let fall to the floor, as well as some from you that you didn’t even realize had dripped down. He smiles. 

You feel like a pet, like a slave. 

You fucking love it. 

“That’s my good girl.” he praises you. You wipe off your mouth and look up at him through your eyelashes. He squats back down to your level, seeming to have fallen for your puppy dog eyes. 

“Does my baby need help getting cleaned up?” 

“Yes daddy.” 

He bends down to pick you up, which he does with ease, as if you weighed nothing. He guides your legs to wrap around him and he carries you into the bathroom. 

He sets you down to sit on the toilet and turns on the shower to start heating up. Why do you feel so dizzy? You gaze can’t focus. 

“Cora… don’t pass out on me my love.” he holds your face in his hands. 

“What do you need baby?” you grab onto his wrist to try and steady yourself. 

“Just a minute… I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t apologize, take your time.”

He strokes your hair as you take a few deep breaths to steady yourself. 

“Is the shower ready?” you ask. 

“Yes my love, whenever you are.”

“Will you help me?” you ask.

“Of course” he says as he starts guiding you towards the shower door. 

He lets you step in first and before you can protest that you can shower on your own, he steps in behind you. 

It's a really big shower, with beautiful blue tiles and a detachable shower head. Detachable? Huh…

You lean into his chest, your head barely meeting the middle of it due to his height. One of his arms wraps around your body while the other starts to shampoo your hair. 

Why do you already feel so comfortable with him? As if you have been showering together for years. You literally just licked this man’s cum off the floor and have no remorse about it. Should you feel guilty? 

Nah, you kind of just feel like bragging to other Atiny’s on Twitter. I sucked his beautiful cock!! Suckers!!! Probably wouldn’t be the best idea…

After washing the rest of your body and getting you out of the shower and making sure you brushed your teeth, you are now tucked into his extremely comfortable bed. You don’t usually sleep naked, but it seems right when he is too. 

You turn to face him in the bed. He was already staring at you, it seems. 

“You know, I wasn’t expecting us to fuck right off the bat..” you admit. 

“Me neither, but I am not surprised. It’s hard to resist you.”

“You’ve been resisting me for the past 6 months. You know I always craved more from you.”

“Yes I did know. But I didn’t want to enjoy you in such a public space. I just craved being around you. Its hard to resist you, though, princess. Just know that.”

I guess that makes me feel better, but still… so many things unanswered.

“I know you are probably questioning a lot of things. Just try and get some sleep tonight, okay my love?” he asks. 

“Okay..” you agree in a small voice, knowing that you will wake up tomorrow with even more unanswered questions. 

“Good girl.” He curls his arm around your middle and tucks you into his side, kissing your forehead before drifting to sleep. 

He smells like the same cologne he was wearing earlier tonight. Beautiful, musky, and masculine. You let yourself drift to sleep, breathing him in.

OKAY I DID IT MY FIRST CHAPTER. plz reblog and like.

[chaifootsteps]

I mean, are we surprised? Just like their broodmother, Viv's fans love to flatter themselves with the idea that you care about them that much. I don't think they realize a majority of your blog is people talking to you about why they hate the standom, and you literally just respond to the conversation topic- it's not like you go looking for this shit. Baby, sweeties, you're not that important, nobody is masterminding things to get you booted off reddit. You just get booted off cause you're annoying in general.

It reminds me of how not long ago, they made a big deal about how I have like 11,200 posts marked "Viv stuff," completely disregarding the fact that...

"Viv stuff" is a courtesy tag so people who follow me for non-Viv content can blacklist if they want, and it gets applied even if it's an essay about fruitcake that happens to mention Viv at the end. A fair portion of it is positive.

The grand majority of it is asks from people who came to me. It's actually a lot more, since I get more asks than I could ever possibly answer.

With 11,200 asks' worth of criticism, I don't need to go around scheming up ways to make everyone say negative things about Viv and her shows. Clearly, they're capable of doing that on their own.

[coff33andb00ks]

Recipe for the Perfect Christmas 10/12

One part small town girl coming home from the big city. One part handsome stranger. Five parts lifelong friends (don't forget to include their partners). One part stubborn father. A dash of Christmas spirit. Part: Ten of Twelve Pairing: Oscar Piastri x ofc (with appearances from Mark Webber. Lando Norris, Carlos Sainz, Esteban Ocon, Pato O'Ward, and George Russell) wc: 5,668 warnings: none? a little emotional soundtrack: spotify ⋆❆⋆ apple music nav: One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven | Twelve

Lift the bundle from the crock. Untie and remove cheesecloth. Brush with liquor and syrup mixture. Wrap in waxed paper. Place in box. Seal. Wrap and fasten with red ribbon. Affix tag. Add to stack.

Repeat.

The steady, repetitive task kept Natalie's mind blank. The kitchen reeked of fruitcake and the liquor and syrup. She had purposefully chosen non-Christmas music to play on her phone, though had somehow missed a couple carols on her playlist. Adding another cheesecloth to the pile, she picked up the brush and dipped it into the bowl, sweeping the syrup over the top of the cake then sliding it onto the waxed paper.

She couldn't hear anything above the music playing in her ears but knew the moment the back door opened. She wasn't sure if it was because of the cold air that slipped into the kitchen, or the shadow that moved in her peripheral vision. Pausing in her task, she held her breath, finally turning to see her father washing his hands in the sink. He didn't say a word, even after she removed her earbuds, and she felt the pain in the silence as he took another fruitcake from the large crock.

They worked without speaking. She remembered a long-ago night when they had worked in this fashion. When the air had been thick with the words she had already said and the silence had been painful. The only difference was that they were both a little older.

As he placed the last fruitcake on the counter, she felt a pang in her chest. The last fruitcake was always taken home. It was the only one he allowed himself, even though it was his favorite holiday treat and hers, too. He wrapped it meticulously in the waxed paper, as those for customers had been wrapped, then paused.

Natalie furrowed her brow when he unfolded the paper and reached for one of the knives on the magnetic strip. She wanted to ask what he was doing, but it was obvious he was going to slice into the fruitcake. Despite his self-imposed rule that it wait for Christmas Eve, when it would be enjoyed with his best brandy after getting back from the candlelight service at church. She watched the knife glide through the cake, watched the slices cascade, then watched him set the knife down.

"I don't have my brandy," he said.

"It's not Christmas Eve," she pointed out.

"Are you gonna be here then?" he asked.

Her breath caught, and she thought of her laptop, which she'd left on the kitchen table, email open on the job offer. "I will."

"Then we'll take another one home for then." He picked up a slice and looked at it.

"Two fruitcakes for yourself?"

"Why the hell not."

Natalie bit her lip, waiting for him to bite into the slice. When he didn't, she frowned.

"Did I ever tell you where I got this recipe?" he asked, still staring at it.

"I don't think so."

"It was in your mother's family. Started as a Christmas pudding with her great-great-grandmother in England, and when they came here they adapted it. Her mother perfected it. It was the one thing I'd never been able to do right, and when we got married, she and your Nana showed me how to do it properly." He sighed. "It was the third-best thing she ever gave me."

"What were first and second?"

"Second was her love and partnership over the twenty-two years we had together." He turned, holding the slice of fruitcake out to her.

She took it, knowing just by touch and smell that it had been prepared perfectly. "What was the first?"

"You."

"Oh, Dad," she whispered, vision blurring with tears. She wasn't a gift. She was a nightmare. She'd left him at the worst possible time, had distanced herself for years, and had only come back because she had no choice. And her knee-jerk reaction when she got upset had been to do the exact same thing. But it occurred to her that if she took the job in Atlanta and left, that she wouldn't be welcomed back so warmly. "I think you're wrong."

"I never thought I was."

"Even when I left?"

"Especially then."

"How?" she asked, setting the slice down. She didn't deserve a bite. "How could you still think I was great when I basically told you to take this place and shove it?"

"Because you're my child. And I'll always love you. I'll always be proud of you."

She shook her head. "I'm nothing to be proud of. I've had how many jobs? I either choose a place about to go bankrupt or a company I don't fit in with—"

"That's just bad luck, Natalie."

"How many punches on my bad luck card do I have to get before I get some good luck?" Natalie shook her head again and pushed away from the counter. "Ever since Mom died, I've spiraled like water in a toilet before it flushes down."

"You think you're the only one?" he asked, scowling. "You think you're the only person this world craps on? Grow up. People around the world have it worse in a day than you have in a year."

She gaped at him, not sure if she was insulted by or surprised by his outburst.

"There are folks out there who don't know where their next meal is coming from. Families that have to choose between keeping the lights on or putting food on the table for the week. People get kicked out of their supposedly loving homes because of who they're attracted to or what they do or don't believe in and have to fend for themselves. Kids that are sick and dying but can't get the help they need."

"I know," she said. "But—"

"You've never had to worry about any of that. Because of this place," he said, gesturing around them. "Because my grandparents chose this little spot to settle after they got married, and because they put years of blood and sweat and tears and love into this dump. And then your grandparents stepped in and kept it going. When prices had to go up and sales slacked off, we went without just to keep this place open. Then it was my turn, and when you came along I swore that I would do everything I could to make sure you never had to want for anything."

"Dad—"

"You're allowed to be selfish. I know when you're down how hard it is to see that it could be so much worse. But you don't have it so bad. There's a roof over your head and you didn't have to pay for your schooling." He inhaled then exhaled shakily. "I wanted you to take over for me when it was my turn to hang up my apron, because it's the family business. And yes, it hurt like hell when you told me you'd rather do anything else, but I knew I had to let you go."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. She didn't know what else to say.

"I'm sorry that you're upset because I'm selling the place. But I'm not sorry I'm doing it. You don't want it. Max does. And he'll be successful, because he loves this almost as much as I do."

"Does he?"

"He does. I told him I'd take down all the old stuff and he insisted it stay. He doesn't want to change it. He said…" Her father paused, closing his eyes briefly. "He said there are lifetimes of memories on the walls and he wouldn't dream of wiping them away."

"He's right." Anywhere she looked she could pull up a memory. The counter, currently stacked with fruitcakes, wiped clean and being dusted with flower so her mother could teach her how to knead. The row of knives on the magnetic strip, which she had taken down once a week so her father could sharpen them. It was a physical rolodex of memories, good and bad, and so was the shopfront, where she had spent the afternoons of her childhood. "I grew up in this building."

"I know you did."

"It was the last place I saw Mom." She stared in the direction of the back door, which her mother had pushed open and then paused, unruly snowflakes floating inside as she reminded Natalie to put the chicken on for dinner. Her own bored reply echoed in her mind and she again felt the flush of guilt and shame.

"Me, too." He finally stepped away from the counter, limping over to switch on the coffeepot near the oven. He stopped, placing one hand on the door of the oven. "She was mad at me."

"She was?" Natalie frowned. She didn't recall her mother being mad. Rushing, yes, and complaining about the weather she had to drive in, but not mad. "What about?"

"I was supposed to go shopping with her. But I had to put in an order, and was running late on getting the work for morning done. She didn't like driving in the snow. I told her to stop being a baby. She told me I was being an inconsiderate ass. It was my fault she was leaving late, and it's my fault she went alone."

"Dad, no," Natalie whispered. "It wasn't your fault."

"I know the accident wasn't. Not really. But… It was. If I'd left the work for morning go until we got back, or told her to wait until the next afternoon… Or if I'd delayed her longer so she was five minutes later. Or had told her to leave earlier…" Mark drew in a shaky breath. "She wouldn't have been in that spot when that driver hit the bit of ice."

"But it could have happened to her either way. Or it could have been so much worse." The fact that no one else had been injured or died in the accident had at first been a point of anger, but it had shifted into a comfort. Her mother would have been upset at more loss of life. "Or you could have been in the car and died, too."

"I know all that, sweetie. It doesn't make it easier."

"I know," she murmured. She hesitated, then finally closed the space between them.

"I didn't tell her I loved her."

"I didn't either."

He lowered his head and her heart broke for him. She slowly reached forward and placed her hand on his arm. He turned slightly and her breath hitched at the tears in his eyes. "It hurts every day I walk in here, because I always remember that my last words to her were 'hurry home' and not that I loved her."

"She knew you loved her. Dad, she knew."

"She knew you loved her, too." He wrapped his arm around her and exhaled slowly. "She would be so proud of you."

"Sometimes I think so." Natalie squeezed her eyes shut. "She'd hate that I'm single and childless, though."

"Yeah, she did want grandkids," he murmured with a quick chuckle. "But more importantly she wanted you happy."

"I thought I was. Then I wasn't. For a little bit when I first moved back I was. Now I'm not again." Sniffling, she pressed her face into his shirt.

"Have you talked to Oscar?"

She stiffened and pulled away, brushing her tears away while turning to put the boxed fruitcakes away. "There's nothing to talk to him about."

"He didn't do anything, sweetie."

"He lied to me."

"And you've never lied?"

"Not about something this important." Picking up two boxes, she carried them to the storage rack.

"I lied, too. Be mad at me."

"I love you too much to stay mad at you," she admitted.

"I was gonna say the same thing." He got his garish mug from its hook above the coffeepot and filled it. "You love him, too."

"No I don't."

"You're lying again."

"I don't!" She set the next two fruitcakes down with more force than necessary. "God, I don't even know him."

"Well." When she glanced over, her father was twirling the coffee in his cup. "You know him pretty well, I'd imagine."

"I'd rather not talk about that."

"You never said how his scrambled eggs were."

"They were sunny side up."

He chuckled. "You do love a runny yolk."

"It takes more than sex and a good cooked egg for love, Dad."

"You know what it took for your mother and me?" He waited until she threw up her hands in silent defeat and smiled. "A laugh."

"A laugh," she repeated, blinking in confusion. "Really?"

"She was visiting her cousin over the summer. They came in one morning for donuts and I shortchanged her." His smile widened and Natalie knew he was lost in the memory. "Wish I could say it was because she was so beautiful I forgot how to subtract, but it was because I was in a hurry so I could go out back and smoke. She came back in a few minutes later and then marched right out back to tell me to give her the three dollars I owed her. Then she took the cigarette from me and threw it on the ground. Hop to it, she said, snapping her fingers. I asked her who the hell she thought she was, and when she said either my dream customer or my worst nightmare, I laughed in her face."

Natalie smiled. She'd heard the tale before, but only that her mother had come in and had thought Mark was cute. She had only meant to stay in town two weeks to visit her cousin, then had extended her stay to last the entire summer. She'd come back over her Christmas break from college and had never left except to go get her things from her dorm.

"She told me the night I proposed that she fell in love with me right then."

"That's sweet, Dad. But it's more complicated for me and Oscar."

"Because you're making it complicated."

"He doesn't even know what he's going to do after Max and Eve move into the house."

"So?"

"And I might be leaving."

"And?"

"I don't think Oscar's the type to follow a woman to Atlanta." She sighed. "He doesn't like big cities."

"There's always a suburb. And the type of work he does he can do anywhere."

"Plus he lied to me."

"Because it wasn't any of his business. It was my job to tell you, and I royally screwed that up. He cares about you."

"How do you know that?"

"I'm not blind, sweetie." He sighed and took a sip of his coffee. "Don't push him away. You know he's a good man."

"He is," she agreed.

"And I guess he's okay looking."

"He is," she said again. He was more than okay looking.

"I'm not trying to push you into a relationship with him, I just want you to patch things up. It's up to you to do that."

"I guess so." She smiled faintly, remembering Oscar gently urging her to talk to her dad.

"But do it quick."

"Why?"

"I miss Penny."

Oscar slid the last cookie onto the platter and tossed the cooling rack into the sink. Baking wasn't his strength, but he had always heard that the scent of fresh-baked cookies made a house smell like home. He knew his friend would be slightly disgusted that he'd bought and baked pre-made dough, but it was the best he could do. Setting the platter on the island counter, he moved to rinse the racks and dried them off before pushing them into the drawer next to the stove. He wiped down the sink, slightly adjusted the platter of cookies, then did a quick look through the house to make sure everything was truly ready.

It was. He'd made up all the beds with the sheets Eve had brought one weekend. There was a new puzzle mat waiting for Lucas in his new room. For Grace was a set of toy horses, one of which resembled Bonny and her foal. On the dresser in the master bedroom was a vase filled with purple roses and a gift certificate to the town's salon for Eve. Next to it was the pair of sunglasses he'd purchased to replace the ones of Max's he'd broken accidentally. Eve's home office was ready to go except for her computer and whatever little things she wanted to place on the shelves. The bedroom he had been using was clean, his things mostly packed and ready to be loaded into his truck after Christmas when he left. He wasn't sure but he had an inkling it would soon be made into a nursery. Max's home office downstairs was ready to go, complete with the new computer Eve had ordered for him. The playroom was organized and neat, all the toys in their respective cubbies. The living room and den and dining room were ready, and he knew without looking that the basement was, too.

He ran his hand along the back of the couch, checking that the living room was perfect. His gaze moved to the plush rug in front of the fireplace and he tried his best to ignore the way his chest squeezed. Turning his attention to the Christmas decorations, he nodded to himself, glancing to the twinkling tree in front of the bow window. Underneath it were two wrapped gifts for Grace and Lucas to open that night. Moving into the front hall, he idly adjusted the lighted garland twining down the banister of the staircase.

From the utility room behind the kitchen came a small yip, and he watched Penny come trotting through to the front hall, skidding to a stop at the front door, where she sat, tail thumping excitedly.

"They here?" he asked, bending to scratch behind her ears while he opened the door. She waited, body starting to wriggle, then darted out as soon as Max's SUV was parked and the engine cut off. Oscar leaned in the doorway, smiling, as the dog rushed around in excited circles, then zoomed to greet first Eve and then Max.

"Hey!" Max laughed when Penny leaped through his open door.

"Penny," Oscar called, stepping out onto the porch. "C'mon, girl."

A few seconds later she jumped out of the passenger door, and took her time to join him on the porch. Her tail wagged incessantly as Eve let Grace out, and when they headed across she gave another yip of greeting.

"Hey," Oscar greeted, catching Grace when she threw herself at him in a hug. "Good drive?"

"Mommy peed three times," the girl announced.

"Yes thank you, Grace," Eve sighed. "I'm sure Oscar needs to know about my bladder function."

He knew why already, but he had to ask. Grinning, he caught her in a quick hug while Max carried Lucas from the car. "Did Max make you drink Red Bull again?"

"He knows better by now." Eve smiled. The same smile she'd given him twice before. "I've been drinking more water today."

"Why?" he asked, making a face.

"Damned if I know." She moved inside, then turned around and grabbed his arm. "You know, don't you?"

"Know what?" he grunted, stumbling when she yanked on his sleeve. "Eve!"

"He told you!" She glared at Max, who was just coming up the steps. "You told him!"

"I didn't tell him a damn thing!"

"Oooo!" Lucas's eyes widened. "Bad Daddy."

"Your mother drops the f-word three times a day and I get scolded for saying damn?" Max shook his head. "What's up with that?"

"Mommy." The boy shrugged as though that were enough explanation, then tipped his head back to look at the lights crisscrossing the ceiling of the porch. "Pretty lights."

"The decorating looks great, Oscar," Max said, nodding with approval. "Your best work."

"Thanks. I had thorough instructions."

"It does look great," Eve agreed, still holding onto his sleeve. "It looked so beautiful from the street. Did you leave—"

"Room on the main tree for the kids' ornaments, yes," Oscar finished for her, nodding. "Can I have my arm back now?"

"Did he tell you?" she asked.

"No, he didn't."

Her eyes narrowed behind her glasses. "You were supposed to ask me what he allegedly told you."

Oscar blinked, then slowly turned his head to look at his friend. "What'd she say?"

"You gave the wrong answer." Max looked at his wife. "I didn't tell him."

"But he knows."

"I gotta nose," Lucas announced, jamming his index finger in one nostril. "See?"

"Ew," Eve groaned. Letting go of Oscar's sleeve, she took the boy from Max and began rummaging in her purse for a tissue. "No boogers, please, Mommy can't handle it today. Do I smell cookies?"

Grace jumped up from where she'd been lying, loving on Penny. "Cookies? You baked, Oscar?"

"Uh, yeah, but—"

"Cookies!"

"They're the pre-made stuff," Oscar told Max before he could ask. "Don't judge me."

"I judge you every damn day, it's my right as your best friend." Max grinned and headed inside. "Wow, you've made a lot of progress. All the floors are finished?"

"Yeah." Oscar closed the front door while the kids ran towards the kitchen.

"Oh my god," Eve gasped, freezing in the archway to the living room. Her hands came up to cover her mouth, and she slowly spun to stare at him.

"Surprise," he said, smiling.

"Babe, the dining room – Whoa," Max said, joining his wife.

"You said it would be after Christmas," she said.

"I lied?" More than a little touched by their reaction, especially when he saw the glimmer of tears in Eve's eyes, he cleared his throat. "I didn't want you to have to cram the last of the moving into those few days after Christmas, and… I wanted to give y'all a good gift. Especially with, y'know."

"What?" Max asked, unzipping his coat.

"You know," Oscar said slowly.

"Oh for fuck's sake, we all know I'm pregnant again, stop tiptoeing around it." Eve flung her arms around Oscar and squeezed. "Thank you so much."

"You're welcome," he murmured, hugging her back. "You guys deserve to spend Christmas in your new house."

"The upstairs is done, too?" she asked.

"Beds made, rugs vacuumed, everything already here is put away." He smiled when she headed up the stairs. "I even put a mint on the pillows."

"You're an asshole for not telling us it was finished, but I love you," she called over her shoulder.

"Love you too," he promised.

Max hung up his coat, then picked up Eve's from where she'd dropped it. "When did you finish?"

"Couple days ago. I spent yesterday and today doing the decorating and cleaning up." Oscar picked up Eve's purse and set it on the console table. "I figured I could rent a van and start bringing the rest of your stuff down next week."

"That'd be great. Did Natalie help?"

Oscar tried to not react to the mention of her name, but knew his frined had caught something when his eyebrows lifted. "No, she didn't."

"Wanna talk about it?"

"She found out about the bakery."

Max sucked in a breath between his teeth. "Mark said he was gonna tell her this weekend."

"She found something about it from a lawyer." Moving into the living room, Oscar crossed to the fireplace and adjusted the screen. "She was upset. At me."

"Because you didn't tell her?"

"Yeah."

Max nodded. "It wasn't fair to ask you not to say anything."

"If I'd told her, she still would have been upset," he sighed, staring at the fire. Not wanting to remember what had occurred in that spot the last time the fire had been going, he stepped away, pushing his hands into his pockets.

"Maybe not as bad."

Oscar sighed. "Doesn't matter. She's done with me."

"Done?"

"I asked her if we could talk about it and she said she had nothing more to say to me." He shrugged, trying his best to pretend he wasn't as affected by her cold dismissal as he truly was.

"Shit, I'm sorry," Max whispered. "It's all my fault."

"No it's not."

"I should have told her. I should have made Mark tell her. I should have told Susie. I should have—"

"Max, stop. It just wasn't meant to be."

"You're gonna give up?"

"It wasn't like it could go anywhere."

"Why the hell not? You like her. She likes you. There were hearts in your eyes and music playing whenever you looked at each other."

"It's better this way," he insisted. "I'm leaving after Christmas."

"You're what?"

Oscar jerked his head up at the sound of Eve's voice. Sighing, he nodded. "I'm leaving after Christmas."

"Why? Where are you going? What are you gonna do?" she asked, glancing towards the kitchen. She squatted down, catching Lucas when he toddled up to her and thrust a cookie in her face.

"Oscar cookies," the boy said proudly, bringing the cookie back so he could take a large bite.

"Where's your sister?" Eve unzipped her son's coat and struggled to get it off without making him let go of the cookie. "Grace!"

Oscar watched his niece appear, coat hanging from her arms. She shook it off then dragged it to the coat rack. And, when her mother told her to go look at her room, she took off upstairs.

"Well?" Eve demanded, straightening and looking at him.

"I'll figure something out between now and then," he said.

"I thought you were looking at the place on the edge of town."

Oscar swiveled his gaze to his friend.

Max shrugged. "I tell her everything."

"Take Lucas up to see his room," she said, eyes never leaving Oscar. "I've got to talk to Oscar."

"Good luck," Max whispered before scooping his son into his arms.

She wasn't usually one for exercise. But the day was so nice. It was damp due to the rain the night before, and the snow was still in thick drifts, but the sun was shining and it was warm enough she didn't need a thick coat. She had felt closed-up, something she wasn't used to feeling, and had finally thrown on a jacket and decided to go for a brisk walk to clear her head. At first she kept to the side streets, and after going around until she was nearly back home, she headed for Main Street and then followed it along until she reached the outskirts of town.

Stopping to unzip her jacket and consider how she wanted to go back through town, she felt a sudden prickle of awareness. She turned slightly, seeing first the 'For Sale' sign and then the little white clapboard split-level. Mr. Wright's house, she thought, recalling hearing that he had moved to the center of town to live with his sister. Her gaze moved to the truck in the driveway and her chest lurched.

Oscar.

As though her presence had conjured him up, the door opened and he stepped outside, laughing. Carlos was behind him, laughing as well, and the two men stood on the small porch, chatting.

Her heart squeezed almost painfully. He didn't see her. Or maybe he did and he didn't care enough to acknowledge? She wavered, unsure whether to call out a greeting or turn and go away before he could look in her direction. She hadn't yet made up her mind what she wanted to say to him, or if she wanted to say anything to him at all. She looked on as the men shook hands, and took a step forward just as Oscar started down the steps.

He stopped, so she did as well. Despite the distance she saw the hesitance in his expression, and bit her lip when he pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

Oh, damn it, she had to speak to him. She continued walking forward, sneakers slipping a little on the pile of snow at the end of the flagstone walk. With each step she tried to think of something to say, but then she saw that he was walking toward her. They met halfway and both stopped at the same time.

Natalie pulled her earbuds from her ears, hastily cramming them into the pocket of her jacket. What was she supposed to say? How could she begin to explain her outburst, her irrational anger towards him that had now faded? What could she possibly say to make it even a little bit better? There was an awkward tension between them and even though she couldn't look away from him she knew that Carlos had sensed it when she heard him mutter something and go back into the house.

Oscar's eyes looked a little sad and she wondered if that were her fault.

"I'm sorry," she blurted.

"I'm sorry," he said at the same time.

"I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you—"

"I should have told you when you asked—"

"It wasn't fair—"

"It was wrong to keep you in the dark—"

"I dragged you in the middle when you were just a bystander—"

"I just didn't want to upset you—"

"I blew it all out of proportion because I was hurt—"

"Especially when I realized I was falling for you so fast and—"

"I was thinking I might be falling in love even though we just met—"

They both stopped. At the same time.

Natalie blinked. So did he. She didn't know why, but she began to smile. And was relieved when he did, too. A laugh bubbled up when they both took a step forward. Slipping her hand into his when he held it out, she sighed.

"You wanna go for a walk?" he asked.

"I just did, but yes."

They strolled to the sidewalk, and his fingers slotted between hers. "Can we talk, too?"

"I think we should." She stopped, frowning. "You're just gonna leave your truck?"

"I can walk back and get it."

Resuming her steps, she squeezed his hand. "I'll walk back with you."

[idrinkoilalot]

honestly i like the shipping aspect of the fandom (truth be told i even like some of the 18+ stuff) but i can definitely see where people who don't like shipping are coming from, because GOOD LORD can some people be annoying about their favourite ships. like there's a time and a place for that stuff, and some rando's RP ask blog is not one of them lmao

BROOOO you guys' opinions are interesting and I like it lololol

I'm kinda gonna yap and maybe forget the point here but I love talking 😭

truth to be told I don't mind it if people keep talking or being annoying about their favourite ships if it's their account or the owner is fine with it but,, I don't like it if you're forcing your ship to people BECAUSE DONT GET ME STARTED WHEN THE FANDOM WAS POPULAR. I was seeing a lot of stickvin shippers attacking other people's ships if henry or charles was in it and one of my old friends was being attacked by them,, but now I feel everything is chill because the fandom is now small but this problem exist in the dw fandom and please let me yap about it a little bit...

especially on tt,, a lot of fruitcake shippers apparently attacking other people's ships if sprout or cosmo was in one of them,, but after this people started to attack fruitcake shippers too because they think it's the right thing to do but they're just making the problem worse 😭 and recently the rnd and sprout dialogue just dropped on the wiki and now moonberry haters started to attack moonberry shippers because they think that the relationship is toxic and sprout hates astro which is farrr away from the truth,, their friendship is way more complicated then saying he's definitely hate astro and I genuinely wanna talk about my take on it but this is not the point now 💔

and when I play the game at least one of 5 lobbies I enter have these shippers rp during the run.. there is literally a rp section in the game I swear I love shipping but please don't do this while we playing especially it's a public server too..

AND THE 18+ STUFF OMG with all seriousness idc if you draw nsfw as long as it's not problematic but please don't post them in the main tag or the public tag because my guy this is harmful especially if the fandom has minors in it and I mostly mean tiktok.

I kinda understand if people dislike shipping because its annoying or the ship wars but I see some of them attacking the shippers which is bad too 😭 I genuinely want people to acknowledge the block button or just scrolling

[ivysprophecy]

200 Followers Celebration!

Fruitcake Edition

in celebration of hitting 200 followers, and the holidays honestly, i decided to pull together a little sleepover for the fun of it! im aware that not many of followers physically interact with me (which is fine!) but i wanted to make a space where you can feel free to reach out anonymously or not and have a little fun! thank you for everything im so grateful for even this "small" of a crowd im so appreciative.

a nonesense christmas - any ask games! fmk, cyms, top five, this or that, would you rather, etc.

santa doesnt know you like i do - character take over! if you wanna speak to any of the characters that i have written, or that youre aware im willing to write for send in ask to interact with them! (do not be afraid to ask if youre not sure on characters!)

white xmas - blurbs! prompts! requests! smaus or normal written fiction ill willing listen to all requests! i cannot promise they will be done in a timely manner LOL

buy me presents - love letters! words on encouragement, advice, just regular chatting, questions or comments, or just a plain ole ego boost!

cindy lou who - moodboards! i love making these so give me a character, a vibe, a color palette, something! and i will whip something cute up in a jiffy

is it new years yet? - fic recs! give me characters and ill recommend you some works that either i adore or ive heard rave reviews on!

last christmas - song recs! give me a vibe, artist, or honestly whatever and ill give you a few of my favs

its the most nonesense time of the year - send me recs! fics, songs, movies, shows, and ill do my best to review them asap!

this christmas - fake title! give me a title for a fic that doesn't exist and ill tell you what kind of fic i'd write for it

santa baby - send in three things about yourself, choose a fandom and gender preference and i'll ship you with a character!

i saw mommy kissing santa claus - nsfw thots ;) send in prompts or dialogue and ill MAYBE make a lil blurb out of it! requires characters and a prompt of some kind.

tagging some mutuals below! theres absolutely no pressure if i tagged you its simply because i like you XD thank you for participating! feel free to reblog and spread holiday cheer!

@murdockcastleslut @arkofblake @kimoralov3 @zyafics-recs @rafesbabygirlx

and then my [ masterlist ]

[wanderlustqueen-writes]

Hypothesis Number Two

Erwin assigns Hange with a mission: finding a way to bond with Levi. Hange's methods are… unorthodox.

Pairing: Levi Ackerman/Hange Zoë

Rating: SFW. Just fluff.

Warnings: Poop jokes?

Aditional Tags: She/Her pronouns for Hange Zoë

Wordcount: 1,9k

“You want me to do WHAT?” Hange’s voice came out squeakier than she anticipated. Then again, the tone was justified, given the absolute ‘nutty as a fruitcake’ nature of the Commander’s request. 

“I said I want you to bond with him,” Erwin’s words were deliberately slow this time. He was standing by her desk in the science laboratory, the light from the candle dancing across his stern face. 

“I heard what you said” Hange replied, her eyes wide open, outstretched hands waving aimlessly at the air in front of her “I just… why? How? How do I even-”

“He’s been here a while but hasn’t made friends with anyone so far.” the commander caught a glimpse of Hange’s eye roll and sighed in response. “I usually stay out of your businesses, but given the nature of what we do, this intervention is necessary. Levi’s raw talent won’t be of much help if he is not able to trust his squad. Or vice-versa. So I need someone to… break the ice. To make him feel more comfortable with the Survey Corps. Someone to bond with him, so others follow suit”

Hange listened carefully to Erwin’s words. Their leader, as usual, had his eyes on an important goal that the others hadn’t seen yet. 

“I understand that, Erwin. But why ask me?” Hange pointed towards herself as if she were a rotten apple at the market stall. “It’s not like I’m someone he is particularly fond of. Hell, he seems to hate me even more than he hates Mike, and I heard that Mike shoved his head into a pool of sewage once!” 

“He did no such thing.”

“Really?”

“Yes. It was a puddle of muddy water. Anyway, I’m asking you because everyone else is scared of him” 

“But-”

“Just think of it as an experiment. What works? What doesn't work? You’ll find out. And if that doesn’t motivate you, just remember that I’m commander and this is an order.” As soon as the last word left the leader’s lips, he turned on his heel and left the room.

Hange stood there for a good ten minutes, awestruck, pondering over what the hell had just happened. She couldn't deny her curiosity about the new captain. He came from a completely different background but his abilities were unmatched, even by the most experienced soldiers. His nonchalance also had some sort of appeal to her, like a mystery waiting to be solved, and it didn’t hurt that he was so easy on the eyes (although she kept that last part to herself). Still, Erwin’s choice was weird. Hange thought that someone more charismatic and generally likable, such as Petra, would be the most obvious person for the job. Was the commander, again, seeing something ahead that was not yet clear to her? Maybe. Probably. But even if that was not the case, Hange wasn’t one to back down from a challenge.

She took a bite of that nutty fruitcake and it tasted exciting and sweet. Fair enough. She set by the lab desk and started scribbling on a piece of paper. Let’s get this experiment going!

***

The perfect opportunity to set her plan in motion came up a few days later when they gathered in the mess hall after a particularly tiring training session with the new Special Operations Squad. 

Hange’s plan was… peculiar. She knew that to bond with Levi, she needed to find some common ground with him, but the captain was so damn closed! The only interest she knew he had was neatness. She was halfway through creating a plan to make their cleaning duty schedules coincide when it hit her: he apparently also liked poop talk. Seriously, for someone so obsessed with hygiene, that shorty sure talked a lot about excrement.

Hange ripped the previous plan and started to write down her new ideas. Erwin said she could think of this as an experiment, right? Then It was only right to approach the matter with the scientific method:

Observation: Levi is an introspective shorty who grunts at everyone, cleans obsessively, and talks a lot about feces. Hypothesis: A poop joke will create a moment of positive connection with Levi. Experiment: Tell Levi a good poop joke and observe his reaction.

Then, all she had to do was analyze the results and convey her conclusions to Erwin. It was definitely a bet, but one that might just pay off.

So Hange buried herself in research for two days, until she found the perfect joke and the right way to tell it. There was nothing else to do other than wait for the best opportunity to conduct her experiment, and when the soldiers sat at the mess hall to tell stories and relieve the tension from the training, Hange knew that it had arrived.

They sat facing each other through the small corridor, their backs leaning against the table tops behind them. Moblit, Hange, Erwin, Mike, and Nanaba on one bench, Gunther, Eld, Levi, Petra, and Oluo on the other, all drinking from their jugs, except for the new captain, whose chosen poison was tea.

“... and that’s when I found Oluo lying in a pile of trash behind the bar.” The older soldier scowled as Petra concluded her story. “Come on, Oluo. Don’t be so tedious. You did look pretty funny with that banana peel on your toupé”. Most of the Corps laughed audibly, and even Mike and Nanaba let out a giggle at the ridiculous image.

“What about you, captain? Do you have any funny stories for us?” Petra asked, still laughing a bit while wiping the tears that had accumulated in her eyes. She seemed to be making an effort to put Levi at ease with his new squad. Hange made a note to herself to ask Erwin about that later.

“No,” Levi answered dryly. Then, when he noticed the negative change in the young woman’s facial expression, he elaborated “Not many fun stories where I come from.”

“I have one” Hange raised her arm eagerly, breaking the uncomfortable silence, and, for once, her comrades seemed grateful that she decided to say something. “It’s a poop joke”. 

“Ugh,” Oluo said. From the corner of her eye, she saw Erwin giving her an inquisitive look. On her other side, Moblit had… was that fear on his face? Oh, Come on!

“So, a bear and a rabbit are taking a dump in the woods…” Hange started, suppressing the grin that was forcing its way into her lips. She wasn’t the best at telling jokes (always got too excited before the punchline) but she was trying her best this time. She couldn’t let external conditions interfere with the results of the experiment. Her comedic timing needed to be perfect. 

Oluo let out another groan. Was he really disgusted by the mention of feces or was he trying to emulate Levi? He seemed to be doing this a lot these days. Petra elbowed him and smiled at Hange. The rest of the Survey Corps all looked at the squad leader expectantly, some more amused than others, except for Levi, who had his eyes fixed on the teacup he was slowly bringing towards his lips.

“A bear and a rabbit are taking a dump in the woods” Hange started over. “After the bear is done with his business, he turns to the rabbit and says “Hey, Rabbit. Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?" “‘Well, no. I’m quite used to it” Hange put in extra effort in making believable voices for the characters, which drew some laughter across the tables. Levi remained indifferent, taking a long sip of his tea. Hange continued.“‘Good’, the bear says. Then he grabs the rabbit and wipes his ass with him.”

For one instant, the room went silent, except for the sound of liquid spurring out of Levi's partially closed lips. Hange’s vision got blurry as particles of tea covered her lenses. The wetness of her face was uncomfortable, but she was focused on more pressing matters. Who was sitting directly in front of Levi, again? Crap! The scientist raised the glasses to her forehead and slowly looked to her right side. Like a wax figure, Erwin sat with furrowed brows and clenched lips, completely soaked in the brown liquid. One could believe he was a literal statue, had it not been for the painfully slow rhythm of his breathing, moving his chest up and down. Crap, crap, crap, crap!! As she thought this, a thick drop of tea traced a path down his left eyebrow. Yep. She was in deeper shit than that rabbit. 

Hange’s mind started working at a frantic pace, a whirlwind of synapses preparing the deepest, most heartfelt apology ever, but, then, she noticed something everyone else had caught on before her: Levi. Even Erwin seemed unbothered by the tea bath he had just taken, as he looked at the new captain without blinking. 

Levi was staring blindly at the floor beneath him, his hand frozen, holding the teacup directly in front of his face. His nostrils were dilated and the eyebrows were completely furrowed, but also… twitching? The captain’s lips moved as if he were trying to say something, but no words were coming out of his body. 

“Is he ill?” Someone asked. The voice brought Hange back to the present. 

“Captain, are you okay?” Petra asked, concerned, then turned to look at the scientist “Hange, I think you broke Levi.”

“What is happening?” Erwin’s question was not rhetorical. 

Hange analyzed the captain for a moment, the ambiguity on his expression,  all the twitching and trembling.

“I think he is… deciding?”

As if it recognized the cue, Levi’s expression melted into an audible giggle. A giggle! It was hoarse and higher pitched than Hange anticipated, but most of all, it was adorable. The sound disappeared as fast as it had come, leaving everyone agape.

“Tch. That was disgusting, Four Eyes.” Levi said, with a small grin on his lips. “Do you know another one?”

‎***

A few hours later,  Erwin stopped by Hange’s side as they refilled their jugs.

“Interesting technique,” the commander said, without looking at her. 

“I guess you picked the right person for the job” Hange smirked, then suddenly remembered her question about Petra. “By the way, did you assign this mission to anyone else?”

“No, just to you. How did you know that that would work?”

“Science” Hange winked. Erwin let out an amused puff of air through his nose, then narrowed his eyes. “Was this also part of your plan?” the commander signaled at the brown stain on his shirt.

“Of course not. But I wish it was. That was genius!” The scientist laughed loudly, and the commander himself giggled. 

“Fair enough” Erwin responded, a light smirk still on his lips. “On a completely unrelated note, I’m assigning your squad to the toilet cleaning task for the rest of the month”

“Oh, come on! I was just following your orders” Hange pleaded, but the commander remained silent. “Okay, fine. It was worth it, though.” The scientist said as she walked back to her table. 

As Hange approached her comrades, Levi moved to make room for her on his bench. Erwin observed the quirky squad leader sit by the new captain’s side and smile at him as she said something. The commander’s lips curled to a slight grin. It wouldn’t be long before those two fools began to see what was already clear as day to him. 

[raventhisintrest]

Also guys I’m making an acc for Lee just for funnies there my persona after all so yea the acc is: @anxietyincarnated

My names Sofia,Raven,Lee.Call me whatever get creative! Idc I like creative names for me.

I go by any pronouns btw!

Anyways ya!so I’m 13(Turning 14 in 2 months)

'Some of my interests are

Invader zim

Ninjago

Pressure

Dandy’s world

Regretavtor

Piggy

AND

CRK(Cookie run kingdom)’

'My FANDOM ocs are

Char-Iz

Lenia ania Masx asch and cloudi-dw

Samuel-pressure

Matcha,Cheri,Blossomed Cheri and wilted spring cooki-Crk’

'My hobbies are

Kandi

Art(planning on doing commisons this summer!)'

Also If u wanna be friends(or moots ppl call it) just uh..yes plz:3

'Anyways some place u can find me are

Roblox-PL4N3T_34TER

Here obv!

Wattpad-Lunar_eclipse’

Ships I ship:Zadr,Shadowvanilla/Puremilk/Pureshadow(only place I can publicly say these with out getting attacked AS much!><),Fruitcake,

So uh yea!

DNI:homophobia racism transphobia,not respecting (others) pronouns,NSFW of minor ppl or characters(or ppl who don’t want it or the characters)

So yeah..I’ll add more soon..so..YEA!

Also some kool ppl are:Thebestinavderever

(I’ll add more ppl later I promise!<3)

Also apparently my oc is now adopted so yeh:D

ALSO MUSIC(and music artist/At end) THAT I LIKE CAUSE YYAAAA

-FUKONA GIRL

PROM QUEEN

Any old Gacha song(yes yes..I was AND STIL AM A GACHA KID><)

HOW MY TAGS WORK(IMPORTANT)

I put my safe vent works under that tag #so yea Thats why I post my safe vent..👍,these kinds usually almost always have warning if there’s stuff I find might even slightly trigger someone(I want ppl to be safe!)-these include either written and posted and art

I put my non safe vents(WHICH ARE USUALLY NEVER POSTED) under the tag,#NON SAFE and #NON SAFE VENT,And if these are posted always have a warning no matter what and if tumblr does have the right mature option will be it under that-these types are only ever written never drawn I keep them to myself

Btw these are just to update on my mental health bc if I can’t even trust myself to not Die,and I can’t tell my parents want atleast some ppl to know how I’m doing so yea..

Other tags are just for sillies:3

BAIII

[astonmartinii]

a very nonsense christmas | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem singer!reader

face claim: sabrina carpenter

based on this request: Hi, how are you can you please write something with Charles x singer reader like a part 2 of "nonsense... or is it?" based on Santa doesn't know you like I do music video something very wholesome idk you can ignore this if you want, hope you have a good day/night 🤍 - @rana030

MASTERLIST | BUY ME A KO-FI? | PART ONE

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,441,934 others

yourusername: do you hear those slay bells ringing? i love christmas so much that i'm giving you guys six new songs for this holiday season !!

view all comments

user1: mama is going straight on the nice list for this one

user2: christmas is saved

charles_leclerc: so proud of you cherie

yourusername: says the muse

charles_leclerc: you're my angel on the top of the tree

yourusername: as long as you're under the tree ready to be unwrapped

pierregasly: STOP

alexalbon: we MUST protect the sanctity of christmas

yourusername: oh alex, do not listen to the ep...

alexalbon: too late just pressed play

alexalbon: YOU NEED THE CHARLES DICKENS ???

yourusername: amazing word play, am i right?

alexalbon: no.

charles_leclerc: he doesn't meant that babe. lily has a commitment, he's just lonely

user3: y/n was like "if you weren't aware, i am getting DICKED DOWN for christmas"

user4: as much as i'd peel all of my skin off to be in either of their positions, good for her

maxverstappen1: i think nonsense christmas has single handedly killed my investigative journalism career. i am not analysing charles' massive sack

yourusername: damn right you won't be

charles_leclerc: maybe you should analyse it, you could learn something from it

maxverstappen1: hOW DARE YOU

yourusername

liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,887,341 others

tagged: charles_leclerc, taylorswift & killatrav

yourusername: thank you to all the lovely people who came to the fruitcake release party ! xx

view all comments

user7: CHARLES AND TRAVIS IN ONE PLACE ALERT

user8: so does this mean we can get a y/n and charles appearance on the new heights podcast?

charles_leclerc: do you think people could tell i was about to pass out while playing the piano?

yourusername: definitely not !

maxverstappen1: yes we could

charles_leclerc: WHAT I WAS JUST NERVOUS AND I DIDN'T WANT TO LET Y/N DOWN AND TAYLOR WAS THERE SO I DIDN'T WANT TO EMBARRASS MYSELF

maxverstappen1: okay i didn't need the pity party. you were good, unfortunately very good. i need to learn piano now. i have to beat you in everything

yourusername: maybe you should've forgone the santa suit... it was quite warm

charles_leclerc: but you wanna be mrs claus ? (i also have a big north pole lol)

alexalbon: ENOUGH

user9: wait so like, was the grid at the release party?

user10: based on most of their instagram stories, and y/n's stories i'm gonna say yes

taylorswift: i had so much fun !! i love fruitcake and tell charlie his piano was great

charles_leclerc: SUCK ON THAT @maxverstappen1

taylorswift: ?

charles_leclerc: we've got bad blood taylor's version featuring kendrick lamar?

taylorswift: i see

maxverstappen1: he's the reason we can't have nice things

user11: someone free taylor from lestappen

killatrav: okay. the girls throw the best parties. esteban and pierre i own your team now, you guys gotta get better at drinking

yourusername: careful travis they're french ...

killtrav: is your boyfriend not also french? he's like a puppy dog

yourusername: HE'S MONAGASQUE

charles_leclerc: i am NOT french

estebanocon: i only threw up because eggnog is not what you guys advertise it to be

pierregasly: i'm not gonna lie i don't remember even seeing you last night

user12: okay so get invited to one of these parties is definitely on the bucket list now

charles_leclerc

liked by pierregasly, yourusername and 1,922,033 others

tagged: yourusername, killatrav

charles_leclerc: charles and travis 🤝 just happy we got a chance

view all comments

user13: if he's not like them i don't want it

user14: if santa doesn't pull through with a man like them under my tree this year ... imma be mad

killatrav: travis and charles 🤝 having girlfriends that make us giggle and swing our feet

charles_leclerc: does the honeymoon phase ever finish?

killtrav: well it definitely hasn't for me

maxverstappen1: NOOOOOOOOOOOO

alexalbon: say it ain't so

yourusername: haters gonna hate 😎

alexalbon: he is so happy it is bordering on insufferable

charles_leclerc: alex :(

alexalbon: i am very happy for you charlie and lily is definitely very happy for you, but if you talk to me for the TWELVE HOUR flight to brazil again i will terminate this friendship

killtrav: i am so confused

user15: poor travis and taylor are just being exposed to the grid chaos

yourusername: you posting this like i'm not the luckiest girl in the world

charles_leclerc: i just love you so much and i'm so glad you shortlisted me for your music video

yourusername: yeah spolier alert there was no shortlist. i wanted you and i didn't want to get out right rejected...

charles_leclerc: as if i would reject any offer from you i think i would've torn down maranello if they said i wasn't allowed to be in it

scuderiaferrari: ?

user16: i'm so obsessed with how much charles has embraced the wag life

user17: can't believe i get to live a life where i can bop along to music about how good in bed charles leclerc is

user18: they better not break up cause i may be tifosi but i shall be streaming

yourusername added to their story

yourusername

liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,833,922 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: santa doesn't know you like i do baby

view all comments

user21: all i want for christmas is even more y/n and charles content

user22: mum and dad have kept us fed over the winter break

user23: i'm not ready for them to be separated when the season starts again :(

charles_leclerc: not to be that person but we're so hot

yourusername: no, you should say it louder

charles_leclerc: WE'RE HOT

maxverstappen1: can you people knock it off or we're not coming to your christmas party

yourusername: ERM ??? 🫤

alexalbon: you people have single handedly made me the grinch

yourusername: but but but ??? you all begged for an invite :(

charles_leclerc: FAKE and that's why you're all getting coal from us

user24: my god i am so lonely

user25: if i don't wake up to a charles shape gift under my tree i will not make it to next christmas

danielricciardo: just to be sure, this party is not going to be filmed and turned into a music video?

yourusername: it's just an old-fashioned shin dig girly don't worry

yourusername: or by the tone of this, should i be worried?

danielricciardo: no!

charles_leclerc: do NOT ruin my home please

danielricciardo: no promises xoxoxo

user26: y/n might want to film the party but I NEED THE FOOTAGE

user27: @tedkravitz boy do i have a gig for you

danielricciardo

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,093,445 others

tagged: charles_leclerc & yourusername

danielricciardo: do NOT drink the eggnog at a y/n christmas party this is a public safety announcement

view all comments

user28: i would commit unspeakable crimes to be present here

yourusername: if you weren't a fake fan you would've listened to fruitcake and would know we spike the eggnog 🤷‍♀️

danielricciardo: i am a fan !!!!!!!!!

yourusername: you asked me and yuki how we escaped the north pole last night

yukitsunoda0511: don't think i've forgotten about that, say goodbye to a tow in quali old man

danielricciardo: IT WAS A COMPLIMENT ELVES ARE CUTE?

charles_leclerc: don't call my girlfriend cute that's my job 🤨

danielricciardo: do you people ever let me live? i am battling a hangover like no other please stop shouting at me

charles_leclerc: maybe someone of your old age should manage his drink better

danielricciardo: THAT'S IT I'M GOING

yourusername: thanks we did actually want the kitchen floor back

user29: daniel calling y/n and yuki elves kills me

yourusername: we're not elf height we're cutie patootie height 💅

yukitsunoda0511: amen

alexalbon: i will endure the torture because that was fucking insane

maxverstappen1: @yourusername you're in charge of all after parties now sorry

yourusername: let charlie win and you got a deal

maxverstappen1: i'd rather drink my gin and tonic in a ditch than let that happen

charles_leclerc: BOOO

alexalbon: cocktail recipe immediately @yourusername

yourusername: you've changed your tune ?

alexalbon: i had fun, sue me. plus i am actually happy for charlie but please no more singing about his dick

yourusername: i can't make any promises

charles_leclerc: and there's plenty of material to get the creative juices flowing

alexalbon: FUCK OFF

maxverstappen1: FUCK OFF

user30: the grid will never know peace, not even at christmas time

charles_leclerc

liked by taylorswift, yourusername and 1,893,446 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: nothing like the holidays with the love of your life

view all comments

user35: how down bad all men should be

yourusername: best holidays ever !!!! love you charlie xx

charles_leclerc: my christmas wish last year came true, and now you're stuck with me

yourusername: no one i would rather be stuck with

charles_leclerc: I LOVE YOU

yourusername: I LOVE YOU MORE

user36: good thing i got presents this year or the sheer sight of this couple would make me so jealous i would spontaneously combust

user37: real

landonorris: you will see to the crime of the stupid amount of mistletoe you had up at that damn party

charles_leclerc: have you seen y/n? (don't answer that) obviously i want any excuse to kiss her

landonorris: i DON'T CARE I HAD TO KISS DANIEL FIVE TIMES I WILL NEVER RECOVER

danielricciardo: i know you enjoyed baby

landonorris: @yourusername @charles_leclerc YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS

yourusername: idk it looked like you enjoyed it to me

landonorris: you WATCHED?

yourusername: i filmed it :) top blackmail material, don't crash into charlie OR ELSE

charles_leclerc: thanks babe

landonorris: @georgerussell63 get the gdpa to intervene nOW

georgerussell63: eh i'm quite entertained

user38: this really is the giving season huh

arthurleclerc: do i mean nothing to you?

charles_leclerc: you're nowhere near as cute as y/n 🤷‍♀️

yourusername: awwwww charlie

arthurleclerc: EXCUSE ME? WHAT HAPPENED TO CHRISTMAS SPIRIT?

user39: charles is really ride or die lol

note: have a very merry christmas! i hope you guys all have a great holiday season and enjoy this quick one! i've been super busy but wanted to give you all a lil christmas treat - much love xx

[miadearden]

Chapter Tag Game

Thanks @aegon-targaryen for the tag

Rules: Post a list of chapter names in as many fics as you'd like. WIP, completed stories, unwritten chapters, whatever, it doesn't matter! Tag people or just whoever sees the post and wants to play! Send an ask and the author will tell you about the chapter, how they arrived at the name, some behind the pages details, maybe even a snippet or all of the above. (If you want, you can even tag as many people as you have chapters, but that's completely optional.) 

This time for already published chapters! (definitely not because I don’t know how to read through rules and only did it for yet-to-be written/published chapters first time around)

A Cold and Brittle Hand

Lost Warmth

Questions, Answers, and More Questions

Pictures Glowing in the Grass

Tulin

Memories Through Birdsong

Enemies Old and New

Sun Baked Bones

Hint of Salt, Heaps of Sugar

Act One: Vegetable Omelette

Act Two: Fruitcake

Act Three: Hot Buttered Apple

Act Four: Seafood Paella

Act Five: Meat and Rice Bowl

Act Six: Sunny Cream of Vegetable Soup

Tagging @auraofdawn, @abbyz-elda, @summonerluna and anyone else who wants to do it (tag me so I know to send you asks!)!

[polutrope]

Self-recs (funny round)

I was tagged by @sallysavestheday @zealouswerewolfcollector @grey-gazania to rec 5 of my own fics, thank you! I love that this keeps cycling around, loving seeing everyone's recs. This time I'm gonna do a humour theme.

Five favourite funny fics by me:

Everlasting Darkness (E, 10.2k). After attempting to steal the Silmarils, Maedhros and Maglor are taken captive and sentenced to serve those they wronged. Earendil/Maedhros, Elwing/Maglor.

“Hmm,” Eärendil said, busying himself with the mooring lines. “I suppose I understand the fetters, but it seems a bit cruel, don’t you think?” He glanced over to where Maedhros knelt. “And I could really use another pair of ha– ah, another hand on board.”

The Magic Flute (M, 6.7k). Daeron wanders from Doriath and rebounds with a son of Fëanor. No, not that one.

“One of the Iathrim? Singing? By the river?” Caranthir didn’t turn away from the plans in front of him–designs for the reconstruction of Amon Ereb’s gates.  “Ah, yes,” Amras said, “something like singing. Hard to say amid all the weeping.” Caranthir grunted. “Sounds pathetic.”

Laughing All the Way (T, 3.2k). A Yule fic in which Maglor and Turgon get stuck with each other and have an unexpectedly good time. Also Finrod is wasted. Gen.

As if Turukáno would want to speak to him! They’d never exchanged more than four or five sentences. Small wonder – what could Macalaurë possibly have to talk about with someone whose favourite dessert was fruitcake? And it wasn’t even iced, he thought, feeling for the circular lump weighing down his left pocket.

✓ Seen (M, 1.8k). Daeron and Maglor read smut. About themselves.

“What’s unethical?” “Oh. Writing fanfic about living people.” “They don’t know we’re living. Or ever existed.” “Yeah, but we could be. We don’t die in canon.” “I think people should write what they want. Nobody is making you read it.” “You are literally making me read it.”

What Happens at Camp Eglarest, Stays at Camp Eglarest (T, 22.4k). Modern AU in which Daeron and Maglor go camping with Beren, Luthien, and Celegorm. Self-indulgent millennial satire and parody of canon.

“No, no, you’re not getting it.” Maglor slapped the steering wheel with his palm and flared his eyes wide at the road ahead. “The semiotics of harmonic categories do not allow for an epistemological analysis of tripartite theory–” “What the hell are you talking about?” Daeron shuffled in the passenger seat and tugged at his shoulder strap.

Keep the rec parade going @jouissants @meadowlarkx @imakemywings @warrioreowynofrohan @i-am-a-lonely-visitor @elennalore @welcomingdisaster @searchingforserendipity25, if you want!

[outdated-tech]

Heyyyaa!!! Vee mod here, here's some info abt me.

1: this is how I draw!!

2: I am aroace/aromatice-

3: I'm sillay

4: I promise I will try to be on more so do tag me

5: this mod is a MINOR.

-will update if I forgot anything. VEE mod out!!

You can also find me on like, tiktok and roblox.

Tiktok: cyn_thesolver

Roblox: burntbiscuitfurry

On roblox, I will not accept if I do not know you in real life even if I do rp with you. You can follow me tho!! I don't mind :) also if you want to play dandys world or something with me I will be willing to!!

If you need to tag me please use the following:

#sd3💚💥 #outdatedtech💚💫 and #cyn_thesolver💫 !!

Please leave this page if you ship fruitcake, I cannot😞 (unless ur in rp group and not toxic!!! 😃)

Ships I do like are listed in the following:

midnightfossilbaking (I made up, its cosmo x astro x shelly) and uhh angryhugs, ragebait, berryfunny, strawberrycookie, ummhhh... *intense thinking* and many more

[loderlied]

2 and 10?

2. How does their race play into the design? Was it a conscious choice because of the racial features or did you simply enjoy the playstyle or lore?

no real reason honestly! weird to say ‘the visions wanted it so’ but in the first vague character concept of zeke that appeared in my head he was a drow, and the half-drow face options fit him better, so that’s what i picked for him in the end. after i actually started developing him i felt no urge to change it so it just stuck. though nowadays i don’t even really consider him a half-drow, that’s just a meatsuit for the the dark urge haha.

10. How much of yourself can be found in your Durge? Do you share the same personality, taste, a specific feature? Are they who you want to be or who you used to be? Are they entirely removed from you as a person?

oh god. i mean. yeah. there’s a lot of myself in zeke just like how there’s a lot of myself in everything i create. i definitely don’t want to be like zeke and as a mere mortal-and-not-the-culmination-of-the-wild-in-one-fleshsuit i never was much like him in his entirety either, but we share some traits, in a way. i’ll give you something that won’t massively put me on blast: we share a lot of our food sensitivities actually! i much prefer to eat raw vegetables & fruit mainly because of the texture. obviously i don’t eat (or used to eat in zeke’s case) raw meat or shit like that but that’s one of my traits amped up in him haha. another thing we share is our extreme paranoia. obviously different causes, manifestations and ways to handle it but. yeah.

(tagging @satanic-fruitcake here because you also asked for these!!)