#dnd ladies and gentlemen

[hikarinokusari]

You're not playing DnD right unless you have a serious-leaning Rogue Shadar-kai PC who puts with a stern face Unicorn Kigurumi to walk in the Faerie Woods to bath in a magic lake.

Also you're not playing it right unless your sorcerer's crocodile pet is turned into a giant rubber duck because of Wild magic.

Credit : forest background from stock (istock)

[andi-o-geyser]

Something is wrong in this city, and it's been such a slow burn that nobody even realizes they're dying.

[keyblack]

This is fun. :D

(Meme base once again provided by my buds)

[hamptoninnfreebreakfast]

Circle of Nightmares Dreams Druid aesthetic | “always sleepy, never tired”

[tharannas]

ehe

[akishourikawa]

Fellas, is it gay to summon the general knight to the brothel...?

- Kuni, the Great Tiefling Babysitter

Our first DnD campaign has come to an end... here was one of the highlights early on.

I plan on making a mini series for the shenangians that went down sometime soon, please look forward to it☆

[vodka-and-ocs]

Dungeons & Inkwells 21: Reborn bard

[hello-sweetheart]

No-upsidedown -au where Eddie’s therapist tells him to get back out there and do things he loved before the accident (tm) like play in a band again or find a dnd group, improvising, or karaoke cuz he used to be such a performer before.

So Eddie chooses stand-up comedy at a local club as a way to work through his trauma. He loves it and feels a little bit more like himself each time he gets up there.

And he’s trying to get through his script, but there’s this (begrudgingly cute) drunk guy WASTED at one of the front tables keeps that interrupting him (despite his clearly embarrassed friend trying to literally silence him with a palm over his mouth) and Eddie has never dealt with a heckler. So he just goes,

“Shh, shh, baby, you need to sit there quietly until I’m done. Okay?”

And this guy is PINK with a dopey grin staring up at him with droopy drunk eyes, “‘kay. I can be good.”

And Eddie’s like!!! (Dramatically clutches his heart and addresses the audience) “Now isn’t he precious,” which gets a few laughs and he moves on.

Until, a few minutes later, he’s almost done with his set, and he does a double take at Cute Guy and he’s like???

“Are yo- are you really raising your hand right now?? Like this is a classroom settling?” Cuz cute guy is apparently polite enough to ask for permission to interrupt his set now.

Eddie gestures to him and indulges him, “fuck it, man. Go ahead, share with the class.”

And this guy just goes “you’re ssoo cute; are you single?”

“…That’s… actually I’ll get back to you on that—Ladies and gentlemen, I’m Eddie Munson and I hope you enjoy the rest of your night!”

He bounces off the stage with a bow to run to cute guy, gets a couple of hollers and whistles out of the amused crowd before leading Cute Guy (laughing as he’s pulled along, “I’m Steve, but you can call me yooours!”) and his friend to the bar where he gets him water.

They’re a riot and Eddie writes down his number on a napkin before giving it to his friend (Robin) for safe keeping cuz, “I have no idea if you’ll remember tonight, but give me a call if, for some reason, you’re still interested in lil old me tomorrow.”

[homunculus-argument]

I love it when characters have depth and stories that are only introduced as a running gag but are actually revealed to have a backstory later on.

One DnD character I had that I didn't get to play very far since the player group fell apart was a human thief, a big city pickpocket who is highly knowledgeable about everything to do with inner city politics, how organised crime works and how to cheat at dice, but hilariously ignorant of anything that happens outside city walls. Like he can spot a money laundering scheme on sight from context clues but didn't know that bears are real. Like he had heard of them, but the whole concept of giant dog-like monsters that drunk hunters brag about killing? That just sounds fake.

One thing about him was that whenever the party he was supposed to adventure with would stay in a city and had to find lodgings, he'd request staying in a brothel. If there is one, he'll find it and insist that it's the best place to sleep. Not because of the ladies (and gentlemen) working there, just in general, for unspecified reasons.

The backstory for this was that he was born and raised in one. He could absolutely never buy the services of a sex worker, that would feel like fucking his own siblings, but the noise and clamour typical of such an establishment is simply the most familiar to him. No matter what the House looks like, he sleeps better in a place that smells and sounds like home.

[sparrow-the-tired-lesbian]

I will never forget that time the head DM at my dnd club had to get our attention so instead of saying ladies and gentlemen he used something gender neutral

“Fags and faggettes-”

and tbh he was right about all of us simultaneously

[eddiesghxst]

Girllieee! First of all I just want to say your new blog theme is so cute and I love it!

Second of all I’m having Eddie brain rot and I was thinking about if modernchef!Eddie would have like a mom food blog with puns and jokes about fantasy and DnD. Where maybe he would recreate dishes from his favorite books and TV shows. And like reader is an active member on the blog always commenting ideas or how the food came out when she tried it.

Or maybe we can do an 80s throw back and maybe Eddie’s got a section in a magazine and reader writes in and they get to letter writing back and forth and she will send him Polaroids of the food and he will send her recipes early to get her opinion?

Very random thought I know, but I couldn’t suffer with it alone 😂

bestie… wait i’m eating this up omfg

i take that and i raise u this:

modern chef!eddie who has a blog and ALSO makes those cooking tik toks (not the slutty ones tho bc those..scare me a lil bit) and all the tik tok girlies obviously love him and he has a big following and then eddie starts talking back and forth with you because you give the best reviews for all of his little entries and then eddie develops a little crush on you and eventually you end up exchanging socials and one day you’re like “i think i might’ve butchered your LOTR honey cake recipe…” and eddie’s like “well, that just won’t do :( how about this, i would be happy to teach you how to make it in person maybe—like… like a date??” and it’s the lamest fucking way he’s ever asked someone on a date but god he really likes you !!

and when you finally meet each other you’re both just like holy fuck this human is insanely perfect and you instantly click and eddie cooks you the most delicious meal you think you’ve ever eaten and maybe you leave him with a little kiss

and then fast forward to a few months later and the tik tok girlies are suspecting that their beloved metalhead chef is seeing someone because there’s been a few videos of his where you can hear someone talking in the back and the comments are always like ‘who’s that i hear talking the back edward?🤨’ and ’king, r u cheating on me ?!’

because eddie’s been holding off on posting you but then you ask him to be your boyfriend and well— okay eddie was planning on asking you first but he’s nervous okay!! he really likes you!!— anyway, so now that you and eddie are officially dating, well eddie can’t hold off anymore and suddenly he’s making his weekly tik tok and it’s starting off with “ladies and gentlemen, my fellow sous-chef’s. the day has finally come,” and he’s cheesing so big as he reaches over to pull you into the frame, “i have a special guest joining me today!”

and the tik tok girlies practically die.

[cedarart]

ladies and gentlemen we have put handcuffs on the dnd boogeyman

[diamondzoey]

Some bug army incorrect quotes!

When the bugs play Dnd

Jemma who’s playing the host: okay so the inn keeper what‘s to talk everyone except Korey

Korey who looks offended: what the f*ck why not me

Jemma sighs: because he can tell your chaotic neutral and doesn’t want to die Korey!

Duarte: Some people are like slinkies.

Vincent: What?

Duarte: Not really good for much but bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.

Vincent:

Vincent: Please don't push Nash down the stairs.

Duarte, pushing Nash down the stairs: Too late

Jemma, skipping rocks on a lake with Azren : It’s such a beautiful evening.

Azren : Yeah, it is.

Azren : *whispering* Take that you fucking lake.

Modern!Raine: How the hell did you crash the car?!

Modern!Jemma: So I was just driving today, right? And my navigation told me to go straight.

Modern!Jemma: I was like "woah, that's homophobic". Instead, I went gay. And, THAT'S when I got into an accident.

Modern!Raine: ...

Modern!azren, with a proud smile: And THAT'S who I'm in love with, ladies and gentlemen.

Timmy: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.

Easton : Wasn’t Sammy with you?

Sammy: in my defense I was also left unsupervised

Emerald: Jemma and I were crossing the street, and this man drove by and honked at us.

Lucy : What did you do?

Emerald: They chased him to the next red light, and reached into his window, and-

Jemma : *walking in* Who wants a steering wheel?

Bloodmoon!Azren: Pfft, you should meet Jemma, they're such a tsundere.

Bloodmoon!Korey: They... they just stabbed you.

Bloodmoon!Azren: So cute.

Bugs in this one

Sammy- @ccstiles

Azren- @strayharmony943

Lucy- @castbracelet240

Emerald- @aspenm00n

Korey- @rozeliyawashereyall

Raine- @willowve01

Easton- @itsargyle

Durate- @puffin-smoke

Vincent- @littlesiren79

Nash- @lightdragon789

[proffbon]

DnD meta, ladies and gentlemen.

[thefandom-casserole]

Episode 52 Notes-

I say this everytime but god I’m so scared rn

I saw spoilers on discord 😭 

My headphones are still broken this sounds so weird

WTF

WHAT IS THIS INTRO

OMG

OMG

ITS HEROOOOOOOOOOOOOO

AYYYYYYYY

I LOVE HER SO MUCH

I love how it’s Taylor singing about Hero instead of Normal her literal brother 😭 

Taylor Fact: Taylor’s personal heaven would be hot soup not spaghetti

Just Italy and Asia have separate personal heavens 

He hasn’t had his coffee 

Linc Fact: Linc’s favorite dessert is applesauce 

Honestly same though. But only homemade 

Pork and applesauce is so good

Normal Fact: Normal still has four baby teeth in his mouth 

Scary Fact: One time Scary’s mom threatened to take her to a chiropractor for an attitude adjustment and now Scary has neck pain 

Anthony Fact: THIS MIGHT BE THE LAST EPSIODE

I know this one isn’t

But still

Oh god

THE TWIZZLERS OMG

AVHAHAHAHAHAHAGE

Mercedes can’t kill him fuckkkkkkk

Taylors character arc 😭 omg

Hermie Scampler omg I feel like that hit more than just Dood

Oh no Willy left 

Normal Style

What was that voice from Beth 😭 😭 

Spanish speaking Normal!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Autistic Linc strikes again

I love Linc so much omg

LINC DID THE SOCCER THING

WHERE HE FAKES

JMAGAHAHHAHA

SPORTS HUMOR

Hero!!!!!!-):$&:&/$:

God I love hero

ARE YOU MOCKING ME WILL?

I said that to my friend Wil today actually

HEROOOOO

My favorite bit is Taylor and Hero omg

LET HIM PASS PLEASE PELAEE

A NAT ONE 

OMG

THATS FANATASTIC

HE BROKE THE SWORD

NOOOOOOOOO

The dnd experience of not being able to open a door

Hero and Normal love each a hahsjsnansndjd

Persuasion YES

SCARY

SHES NKT MISERABLE ANYMORE

“With the power of love and friendship we’ll save the world!” << Normal’s 24 persuasion roll

Nat one for Dood :cccccccc

DOOD WORSHIPS THEM

OMG ITS SO SWEET

ITS WHOLE SPEECH WAS SO GOOD

“It’s like what my dad says. When life gives you apples, you’ve gotta make applesauce”

It’s actually crazy how much I love applesauce. Especially with cinnamon. Yummmmmmmmm

GROUO HUY

Wait just found a post about kfc im intrigued wtf

Back to the topic at hand oop

WAIT WAIT WHAT

A DIMENSIOM KF

Chaos and darkness, confusion and love, fear and anger

:ccccc soemthing something that correlates to the teens and of course that’s where they go. of course. 

“I know you can do this. I think you all are gonna be alright”

THIS JS MY THIRTEENTH REASON OMG OMG OMG

THIS IS MY WHITE WHALE

JESUS CHRIST

OMG OMG

THEY DUD THE THING

SAVE ME S1 SONG REFERENCES IN S2 SAVE ME

And a fucking ad ong omg

Ayyyy Willy can’t travel through realms now that’s good that’s good

“LINC what do you mean we don’t need you”

And that ladies and gentlemen is Scary, 52 episodes in. Beth May you’re a fucking genius. HER ARC WAS SO AHAHAHAHABAHBAJAHABZBBB

I’m unwell

Linc I love him so much omg. 

His soccer special interest makes me so happy. 

Linc is me fr I love him so much 😭 

TWO TIME TRAVEKING LESBIANSNSNAHAHANSJAHA

I SCREAMED 

I SCREAMED

AHHANSNABABAHS

JANE AND LIZZY

I love them so much :>>>>>>>

Immortal combat I loved that

Linc always carries a ball pump Jesus

Linc also hasn’t lost his baby teeth

NORMLINC I DONT KNWO THEIR SHIP NAME

Dolphin diver Linc

Darryl learned a lot!!!!!!! I love Darryl ong

PAEDEN

OAEDEN MABAGAHAHAGAG HAS SVGEGSFSHAHSHHAHAHHSHSHHSHAGSHAHAHSHGAGWGEHSHSHSBSHSHBSBSHSHAHAGSHAAHSHSHHSHSJSJSJSJSJJSJSBDHSJSJAHDHSAHSJSJSSVSHJSVAVSVSVVSAVV

PARDNE IN AGAHSHBSBS SBAHGABSHHSSSGHAHAHEGWWGGS

HES IN s2

I can’t breath

HAHAHAAGGSVSGVSVSVVSV

HAHAHAGSGSGGSGSGSGEGGWGWGGWGWGWGGWGGWGW

JM LOSOIMF IT

For how little that was

I replayed it so many times

Go teens!!!!!!!!!!

BETH

LINC vs Freddie’s dad who’d win

IS CHUG GONNA BE LJKE DOUG

HOLY SHIT

CHUG THE ACCIUNTANT

DOUG THE INTERNE

What a dumb name WILL

My Wil (you know who you are scuttles) if you see this know I’m looking at you. Defense is going down. Way to win rock paper scissors loser /aff

Willy Wonka and the Unknownnnnn

They

They forgot about Hermie

Again

Omg

I’m gonna lose it

They brought Hermie back

And forgot about him

This is fucking hilarious 

They forgot about Hermie 

Ayyy Hermie is back again

Jesus

Hermie can’t pretend to be water Jesus 

Hot glue normal strikes again!!!

Teeny!!!!!!!!!!!

Taylor and Normal arts and crafts duo!!!!!!!!!

Chuggs talks like me in real life actually

Gee whilikers 

Chugs the real life warrior

ROGUE IS SCARY’S FAMILIAR

FALCOR THE DOGGAGGAGABABABABABBABABAHSBAHAHAHAGAHA

Scary’s kinda scared of dogs!!! Just like me fr!!!

Swiftli crumbsbsbbabahahahahs

“Little less attitude”

Hermie!!!!!!

Hermie as Taylorrrrrrrrrrr

THEYRE COUSINS

ISH

NORMAL

NORMAL

SCARY’S BIO DAD SHIT MAN

FAIRYTALE

OMG

Jesus Christ

Taylor is gonna go insane if Willy kills Cassandra

HE WILL LOSE HIS MIND IF WILLY KILLS CASSANDRA

WILLY LLEASE KILL CASSANDRA

RABECCA

OG MY GOD

Finale next episode

I’m gonna sob

[underwaterspaghetti314]

Ok. So I have a lot of ongoing mini painting projects right now because if there’s one thing I am absolutely incapable of doing, it’s working on and prioritizing things that progress my life forward instead of actively sabotaging my own future, but if there are two things I’m incapable of doing, it’s that and finishing a model before starting on another one. All this is to say that right now I’m working on a lotta little guys, including (but not strictly limited to) my weird Slaaneshi space marine, my armadillo termagant, Captain Titus of the Ultramarines, a squad of 6mm Eldar jetbikes, a DnD elf wizard, a Warhammer fantasy elf named the Bladebreaker because both her swords broke while painting her, a skitarii-elf kitbash that I’ve named Inquisitor Dimitri Carlisle, Carlisle’s genestealer cultist nemesis by name of Wermigon, a Possessed Soldier from DOOM: The Board Game, a couple skitarii rangers, one skitarii vanguard on a giant motorized unicycle, and a bunch of terrain. However, with all this being said, there is one project that, despite it being only in the very beginning stages, I’m very excited about and I want to bring special attention to today.

Ladies and gentlemen…

The Hatsune Miku dreadnought is now in progress.