#did i make this whole edit just for that dumb joke at the end….

[thestobingirlie]

jonathan byers no1 secret stancy stan 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[yok00k]

Igual Que Un Ángel

pairing: hellokittylover!/bimbo!oc x boxer!jk

genre: MATURE, fluff, lowkey angst,

“heaven must have sent you, love”

synopsis: after spending the entire day shopping with your boyfriend, you’re craving mochi donuts and bubble milk tea before going to bed and jungkook, even in his tired state, will do everything to make you happy.

word count: 5.4k

warnings: so much fluff, NO plot, jealous/possessive kook, oc can’t tell when someone flirts with her, tiny silent treatment, oc is kinda dumb, lots of kisses, shower sex, oral [m], oc’s head game is STRONG, head pusher jk, hair pulling, they went shopping for underwear, cussing, aftercare, oc is obsessed with pink/hello kitty, oc is so desperate for his cock and she must get what she wants⛄️(she was virgin before this took place), oc had a vid of her playing, mention of toys, JK is not trying to b obvious but he’s IN LOVE, brief cockwarming at the end, <not proofread>

author’s note: i def did not write this in between my classes😮‍💨 i just discovered that im mentally unhinged as im editing this in class. I have my priorities straights tho so here you go🥢

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ ⋆

you suppose today was really wonderful.

you two spend almost the whole day at the outlet mall, mostly to shop clothes for yourself. you needed new pairs of undies and Jungkook being the glorious boyfriend he is, helped you shop. not only he paid for all your purchase, he also gives his opinions on certain cloth materials of what the underwear was made of. he wants to make himself useful by helping you out pick out make sure that they’re comfortable to your preference, he goes with you in the fitting room to try them on in front of him.

As you try on clothes for hours and hours in multiple shops, your boyfriend miraculously always finds a chair in the corner of each fitting room that he can rest on. a few hours later, you two arrive back at your place. jungkook initiated to carry all the paper bags you had as the two of you headed from the garage to inside your house.

soon, he began cooking the night’s dinner, which you really enjoy watching because he keeps entertaining you with his skillful talent and his humorous jokes. a quality time like this just makes you fall in love with him even more. you wish and pray that you can spend the rest of this delightful lifetime with him.

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ ⋆

the hands of the clock signifies 11:11, which is usually the time you drift off to sleep. except tonight isn’t a typical night, owing to the fact that your beloved lover is sleeping over at your cozy flat.

although it’s pretty late, you two are cuddled on your not-so-spacious couch, watching a kdrama that was recently released and you still have the clothes you put on this afternoon: a cute pink long sleeve crop top and a pink/black mini skirt. you also can’t forget to add a pair of thick fleece tights since it’s freezing cold outside.

you felt a sudden cravings for something in the midst of the show. you desire for something sweet. and chewy.

“koo..” you murmur, distracting your man from the show on the big screen. he redirects his focus to you as he caresses your hair with his soft, yet rough palms.

“i’m craving donuts”

“want me to go to the convenience store and grab some for you?” he suggests

“no I don’t want that, I want mochi donuts” you cutely demand

“but baby it’s too late” he said, lifting his wrist to look at his gold Rolex watch. “aren’t they close at this time?”

these days, your social feeds are just full of ads, particularly bakery places nearby your place that serve mouth-watering breads, donuts, ice creams, bubble milk tea, and the list goes on. promptly, the phone that’s sitting next to jungkook was taken by you.

“look, there’s one that’s still open till midnight” you replied, showing him the navigation to the bakery shop that’s on your screen. his tired eyes glanced at your phone, then back at you.

“please koo?” you pleaded, climbing on top of him and giving him thousands of kisses all over his face until he’s got enough is the most effective technique to persuade him. how can jungkook say no when you display a behavior like this to get whatever you want? the forever answer is he just can’t.

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ ⋆

You two arrive at the place twenty minutes before they close. Since it’s late at night, you can see through the big windows that there’s not many customers inside the donut shop.

“oh my, we’re finally here” you joyfully babble to yourself out loud which made your driving boyfriend chuckle. while jungkook slows down the car to eyeball a good parking spot, you reach for your pink purse taking out the hello kitty lip oil to apply them on your chapped lips.

Jungkook carefully parked the car on the side of the road. He looked at our surroundings such as the front, back, and the side of his vehicle, making sure everything seems clear before he takes off his seat belt and gets off of the automobile. As usual, Jungkook walks to the other side, gesturing that he will open the car door for me. This man doesn’t ask a lot regarding how things should be in our relationship but the number one rule he established is that you could never open any door when you’re with him.

He quickly unlocked my door with one hand and offered his other hand to assist my body getting out of the car. As you got out, you felt the strong wind blowing your mini skirts, making them move up. but jungkook immediately takes off his zip up fleece oversized jacket to tie it tight around your waist.he ensures that the skirt won’t go up by walking behind you whilst holding your cold hand towards the bakery.

a scent of sweet caramelized brown sugar that you’ve been craving welcomes you as soon as you step into the threshold of the place. Looking around the store, you notice multiple neon pink led lights of donuts are decorated in the walls. the long honey maple stained table against the windows was paired with white barstool chairs. You also did not fail to miss that their white snowed christmas tree is still up, filled with rosy ornaments and pinkish lights around it.

‘this is definitely my new favorite place’ you noted to yourself as you feel cozy inside.

Your boyfriend wasted no time to lead you to the counter, only for you to see the variety of flavor of their delicious mochi donuts displayed on the front top. you can’t help but to drool on the sight, you’re starting to feel satisfaction by just looking at them.

“hello, what can I get for you today?” the tall male server who’s probably around your age friendly greeted. a little too friendly, in jungkook’s opinion but he chose to try to shrug it off. before answering him, I turned to jungkook “what are you getting koo?” asking to know what he wants.

“don’t know. you can order whatever you want for me” he responds as his doe eyes look up to scan the menu on the screen that’s mounted in their polished ceramic walls. Jungkook is on a diet these days therefore he tries his best to restrain eating sweets but he knows that cheat days won’t hurt if it only happens once or twice a month.

turning to face the server once again, you made up your mind on what to order. “hi, can we get two brown sugar milk teas with less ice and can you make one extra sugar please” you gently requested and the server instantly punched the orders in their ipad.

you take another look at the yummy donuts before continuing. “and i would like to get a dozen of the mochi donuts.” you pointed to the biggest bakery box.

jungkook wasn’t even surprised that you’re getting 12 pieces, potentially all for yourself considering you have a sweet tooth, which could be really extreme sometimes. he stands still next to you, amused by how cute you are, getting all excited by all these sweets you’re about to eat as you tell the the guy the flavors you want.

the server hands you two of their fresh brown sugar bubble milk tea & pink box that contains lots of sugar and of course, you happiness. afterwards, he declars the total for all the things you order. you’re about to tap in your debit card that’s covered with hello kitty skin when jungkook’s black card is already approved on the chip card reader.

“you didn’t have to koo” you murmur. your man always insists on paying for everything,

“i want too”

he does things for you not because he’s going to gain something or that he’s expecting some type of return from you. Rather, he does them solely because he loves you and he loves seeing you getting all the things you want.

for the meantime ,you look for a table that you two can sit at, particularly a spot where there’s a cute background since you would like to take some photos.

immediately, your eyes spot the perfect table right next to the huge windows to sit and take pictures in. you swiftly walk over the spot and your boyfriend follows you like a lost puppy.

“kook can you take pictures of me here?” you ask, while unwrapping the thick jacket around your waist and position yourself on the stool chair.

jungkook unlocks the camera on his phone, positions the cellular in your desired angle, and clicks the white button multiple times. he casually looks at the camera screen and looks up to you. when he notices that by the way your sitting is slightly showing your ass, and instantly goes up to you to fix it. you’re confused at first by his sudden action but you soon realize why.

“oops, thank you kookie” you chortle

when he goes back to his previous standing position, he catches the same annoying server maliciously staring at you, in a way that’s very unpleasant to him, which just pisses him off more. nevertheless, he captures photos of your adorable face while attempting to drink your favorite bubble tea for the camera. then, he passes his phone so you can review the images.

‘he’s such a great photographer’you thought. these picture will be posted on your pink themed finsta.

“can we go now?” jungkook harsly rushed. this place is alright, but that fucking server is just making his blood boils. he needs to get you two out of here before he does something not pretty.

you read his sudden unusual behavior and chose not to argue. you really loved this place, but you can understand that your boyfriend is too tired and just wanted to sleep. you’ll definitely come back though.

“wait koo, I'll use their restroom first.” you excuse yourself, feeling the need to change the menstrual pad that you’re wearing, you fear bleeding through jungkook’s leather seats.

you did your business pronto. unexpectedly when you walked out of the restroom, the friendly worker corners you, with something in his hand.

“miss, would you like to have this?” He offers the cute and huge hello kitty boba plushie that is in his grip. your eyes widening as they gaze upon the lovely thing. “I noticed your phone case and I thought this is perfect for you” he shyly adds as he scratches the back of his head, pointing out the pink Hello Kitty case you have.

“sure! how much is it?” you respond with full of energy. this plush will be added to your collection.

“don’t worry about it,here” he extends the plushie towards you, gesturing that you should take it.

you look for some type of unseriousness in his eyes but you found none. he does seem nice. you accept the cute plushie that’s waiting for you to be held, hugging it really tight.

“you’re really cute. do you mind if I get your number?” the man in front of you speaks. “so i can give you more plushies for free of course” he further explains, trying to convince you to give him your digits

but you remember what jungkook once said, and that is never give any other men your number. Although you can’t grasp why he doesn’t want you to do that, you listen to him because you don’t want to get him all sad and mad at you. angry jungkook is the least thing you want to deal with. he turns really cold and you hate not getting affection from him.

“I'm sorry but I can't give you my number. thanks for this though.” you give him a weak smile. you also hate the feeling of rejecting people but you also don’t want to get in trouble.

the friendly expression that the guy has been erased and replaced with a blank expression, as if ‘no’ isn’t the right answer. he snarls before speaking “Is it because of your punk boyfriend? c'mon pretty girl he doesn’t have to kno-“

“who doesn’t have to know what?” a familiar voice cuts off the man you’re facing before you can understand what the previous man just said.

jungkook approaches you, snatching the plushy in your grasp. “where did you get this from?” he sternly asks. he might have known the answer, it’s so obvious from what it looks like, but he needs to make sure before he beats somebody’s ass.

“koo he gav-“ that was enough for jungkook to vigorously slam the plushy back onto that guy’s chest, making the man flinch and slightly back off. “look or talk to my woman one more time and things will get ugly for you” he threatens, giving the guy the most serious stare, the same stare he has when fighting in the boxing ring.

without saying anything, he grabs your hand sternly and you two walk out the store. you still didn’t get why jungkook didn’t want you to have that plushie, it was perfect to add to your collection.

the entire car ride back to your place was awfully quiet. you offer to drive back home when you notice that he’s speeding and seems so tense, but jungkook refuses, telling you that he’s fully capable of driving back with a somber tone.. his tattooed hands aren’t where they’re supposed to be placed, your thigh. but you argue no further, not wanting to make him more angry than he already is.

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ ⋆

hours later, you’re gathering the sleepwear you’ll wear for tonight before hopping in the shower, which is currently occupied by your boyfriend. usually, you two always shower together whenever you’re sleeping at his place and vice versa, but tonight you received no invitation from him since he’s giving you silent treatment for an unknown reason.

despite the fact, you made up your mind to join him as you enter the steamy bathroom, the warm atmosphere welcomes you while you close the door behind you.

your gaze meets jungkook’s tall muscular figure, his tattooed arm up against the white wall, while head is pointing down as the hot water that’s coming from the showerhead runs down his body.

quietly strip down your clothes, you proceed to open the sliding shower door and step inside the shower, closing the distance between you and him.

jungkook faintly flinched as he felt a pair of dainty arms wrapped around his bare torso. he knew exactly who they belonged to, his loved one.

he slightly turns his head, just to see you, hopelessly showing affection towards him in the midst of washing the negative internal thoughts out of his system.

“are you mad at me baby?” you worriedly ask, overthinking that you might have done something that might upset him or maybe he’s too stressed out on his non-stop training schedule since his competitions are coming soon or maybe he can’t handle being with you anymore. lots of maybe but communication is the only way you will know how he feels.

the question of yours sends a sharp pang of guilt in his chest. you completely did nothing wrong. he knows for a fact you can’t say no to anyone who gives you a Hello Kitty plushie. your tiny little head just can’t comprehend that these guys want something in return for giving you things you love to collect. you’re too good for your own.

now he feels like a total idiot, another part of him feels guilty for the sudden shift in his behavior, solely because he's so in love with you that he can’t stand seeing men look at your way.

you did nothing wrong. nothing at all. you’re just so goddamn beautiful that your boyfriend is starting to lose it.

he can’t help but let the possessiveness take over him as soon as he perceives other guys showing their interest in his pretty girl. the woman he desires to keep to himself for the rest of this lifetime, the next one, and for many more

jungkook crowds you up against the cold marble wall just after he turns his buff body to face you. wasting no time, he leaves smooches on your pouty lips and jaw. “didn’t I tell you I'm the only one who can give you hello kitty stuff?” he sensually whispers to your right ear, continuing to give you wet kisses. “hmm?”

“but why?” you pout, resulting in the kisses to come to stop. he looks at you directly in the eyes, “because i’m your boyfriend and that job is solely for me” he simply explains

“but koo it was for free, he was really nice but then he started asking for my number so he could give me more but i didn’t give it to him because you specifically instructed me not to.” you mindlessly babble, explaining your side all in one sentence. simultaneously, you grab the white loofa next to the pink one and apply jungkook’s favorite body wash. it still doesn’t make sense to you. you love collecting hello kitty, but the love you have for the man in front of you is significantly greater.

oh jungkook is really going to lose it. that fucker had the audacity to ask you shit like that right when you’re with him.

“and that’s why I don’t want you talking to them, they want to take advantage of you” he takes a deep breath

“i’m sorry kook” you mutter, attempting to cuddle his naked form.

“i know something was off with that motherfucker” he starts off, “keeps looking at you in a way i don’t appreciate” he finally admits, with his tone hinting a pinch of jealousy. “and that fucking plush- he’s getting on my fucking nerves.”

“all he can do is look koo” you laugh. “Besides, I’m already cuffed by my hot boyfriend. what more can I possibly look for?” your words declaring that your eyes are only fixed to him. there’s no reason to look at other men anyways.

“you’re only mine right?” he just needs to directly hear those words come out of your mouth.

“only yours” you murmur. and that reassured him. for now.

you stand on your tiptoe to kiss his cute nose, from there you smack your lips against his as your smooth palms trace his jawline.

as seconds goes by, the desire to express how much you love him is rapidly growing. you want him. you need him.

you detach your lips against his, just to fixate them on his neck, right on the pretty tiny mole on his skin, your favorite spot. your hand does its own job to explore his sculpted body, finding its way to palm his painful growing erection.

he knows where this is going

your kisses trail from his upper chest to his defined abs; so brawny and delicious. he follows your gesture, finding you on your knees, beneath him, your beautiful face positioned right in front of his hardening cock.

oh this is the one and only circumstance he would kill and die for to be in.

jungkook knows that sly grin expression you wear as you look up with those round doll eyes. purposely, your both arms push against each other to give him a good view of your perky breast squeezed together. with his shaft twitching, can’t help but to utter an uncontrollable moan from seeing you like this.

“can I?” you ask softly, waiting for permission from him as if you’re not in this sinful position at least twice every time you two spend time together. no matter what, you still drool by just staring at his cock as if it’s your favorite lollipop.

he quietly hums and nods his head while nibbling his lip piercings, giving you the green light.

you start off slow, giving his pretty pink tip covered with precum small pecks. smearing the liquid around your lips, pretending it as if it’s one of your lip gloss, making them nice and glossy.

sweet

“i only wanna do this with you” you hungrily voice out in each swift peck while locking your seductive eyes on his.

he brings his fingers towards your jaw, lifting your chin up. “open” he commands, directing you to open your mouth. and so you did, without hesitation. a hot glob of spit falls into your tongue, which turns you on even more. you quickly swallow it and resume with what you’re doing.

he continues to watch you as your swollen lips slowly wrap his thick cock. your mouth is solely made for jungkook as it welcomes him inch by inch. although sucking him becomes a part of your daily routine, you still need to take a sweet time adjusting to his length.

irresistible tears roll down your face as he hits the back of your throat for the first few times, but you’re so determined to make him feel good. you began bobbing your head back and forth as your mouth slowly adjusted to his size.

“hmm, so good baby” he muffles weakly. “j-just like that” almost sounds as if he’s about to cry from the incredible sensation.

you can’t help but to release a quiet whine from hearing him. the steamy bathroom is filled with jungkook's angelic yet sinful groans, along with the sounds that’s being created as you which arouse you even more. he’s got your pussy clenching over nothing.

your bent knees on the cold and wet ground are starting to get tired, but you pay no attention to them. rather, you take him even more, until his tip hits the back of your throat. you continue to do it smoothly, using no hands.

you proceed to shift your attention to untouched balls. your tiny hand softly jerks off his length upward, as a trail of kisses made their way from the underside of his girthy and veiny cock to one of the oval-shaped organs. wet and loud smooches on jungkook’s sensitive skin turn to sloppy sucking. your mouth is so full of him. a mixture of his precum and saliva of yours covers your entire chin, even some of it drops on the ground.

this sequence stirs more moans from jungkook, but this time he gets louder and louder. his slender hands acts at its own and gather your length hair into a ponytail, just so he can manipulate your head, to use you however he pleases

Jungkook pulls your hair back, causing you to lose contact with the sac you were passionately lapping. he leads you mouth back to where it should give its focus to. his throbbing cock. once his dewy dick is shoved in you, he pushes your cock drunk head to take more of him. you obediently follow the flow of the hand guiding your head

“such a good girl” he grunts, throwing his head up in the air, then focusing back on you. “only for me”. your boyfriend is still controlling your head bobbing on his length.

“you’re such a slut for a fucking hello kitty, aren’t you?” jungkook mocks in between deep breaths. “me or that stupid kitty cat? huh?” thrusting his hips into your messy and well-fucked face.

you just moan against him, not even bothering to answer him because you’re too fucked, your tiny little brain is wearing out as you keep bouncing your head up and down. and also it might be because you know for a fact that you could be a slut for hello kitty too sometimes. you’re in no position to protest.

the man above you grips your hair even tighter, demanding you to answer him. “I wanna hear you baby”

“‘mmh you, o-only you koo,” you sob. lots and lots of tears coming out of your eyes. “all I want is you and this cock” you mewl weakly as you desperately lap his precious tip, just like how he loves it.

“that’s it, pretty girl, I'm cummin’” he verbalizes, grasping your head forcibly as slamming his pelvis into your abused mouth. to this point, you feel dizzy and your whole body is worn out. you grip into his beefy thighs as you allow him to utilize you like a slut.

“hmpp f-fuck” he moans loudly, releasing abundant strings of semen into your mouth. he cums so deep inside your throat. not wanting a drop to fall, you gobble up everything as your life depends on them.

after swallowing, you show him your empty mouth, with tongue being out. you can see in his half lidded eyes that he’s proud, giving you a soft smile.

you were about to get up when all of a sudden the dizzy spell hits you real hard, causing you to lose your balance but jungkook catches you before you can even fall.

“hey, you okay? Did I go too hard?” he locks his gaze upon you, hoping that you will lock yours to him too. but you didn’t as you are sobbing and trembling a little bit. jungkook wipes the dries tears on your swollen face with one hand while the other wraps around your waist. he might have gone harder than you can handle.

“baby look at me please? did I hurt you? i'm sor—“

“koo i’m okay” you faintly cut his sentence off. he doesn’t need to be sorry. “just need a few minutes to recover” you explain. jungkook immediately understands that. he gives you minutes of peaceful silence, with that, he takes care of washing your body. gently rubbing the pink loofah in your smooth skin as he hums the song that’s been stuck in your brain for quite a while.

after showering, he helps you slip on your baby pink dainty nightgown. this dress is special. jungkook got it for you when he flew abroad for one of his boxing competitions. one day, he and his team were strolling around the fancy mall when he passed by a cute local lingerie store that you will definitely check out, only if you were with him. of course, he chose to follow what his heart tells him to do, to go inside and find a thing or two to give you as soon as he comes home. to you.

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ ⋆

both yours and jungkook’s bodies are situated on your twin sized bed. in spite of the fact that there’s not much for the two of you and one of you might fall on the ground if another moves a little, it’s not a hurdle as you two embrace each other’s warmth as if there’s no tomorrow. two bodies comfortably embracing one another. tonight, you’re designated to be the tiny spoon

“ggukie..” you murmur, hot breath fanning against his bare chest. “hmm??” jungkook looks down to see what his princess needs.

“want your cock”you weakly pleaded, causing the man to slightly chuckle. you must be out of your mind.

“baby, your body is tired” said by him, shaking his head to show his disapproval. what a silly idea that goes around your mind when your eyes can barely open. you’re really out here doing everything but to sleep. he continues to caress your soft hair.

on a side note, you and jungkook never had penetrative sex before. yes, he eats you out here and there and vice versa. but he never dares to insert himself inside you.

indeed you’re a virgin but it’s not that you never wanted to. matter of fact you’ve made up your mind and are willing to give your virginity to him. jungkook is well aware of that. however, fear of hurting you always troubles him. he’s afraid that you will go through pain, scared that he’ll break you: his fragile pretty girl

“need your cock inside me” you continue to whine. “didn’t I show you a video of me from last week taking the toy you gifted me? you said I did so well” reminding him that one video clip of you masturbating to the pink rose you got from him. how could he forget about that when he uses it to get off every single night? with full on volume too, all ears concentrate on your high pitched moans, giving him more than the satisfaction he craves. the thoughts of that makes the lust that nearly vanishes inside him linger, you just never fail to get him arouse even before going to sleep.

however, jungkook is still in his right mind. “that’s different,” he argues. it’s valid to doubt that he’ll fit.

“ok then just put it in me then we can sleep?” you beg, attempting to compromise. “just wanna feel you close while I sleep. can you imagine how much I missed you?” you’ve come to an extent to use the guilt trip tool to convince him.

he understands the emotion you’re trying to make him feel as he looks into your bambi doe eyes. looking so innocent yet begging for his cock. evoking his guilt to get what you want. jungkook recognizes you in and out, you won’t take no for an answer. also it’s not like he’s not dying to do it, as if he doesn’t fantasize about it when you sleep over at his penthouse. the amount of self control he has..

you have him on a chokehold. jungkook doesn’t say anything, rather he gently lifts up the arm which your head is laying on and slightly gets up to open the pink mini cabinet on top of your nightstand, taking out a sky blue container.

“here, apply it”, throwing the lube bottle on your lap.

you’re stunned, heart excitedly does jumping jacks inside your chest. next time it will be you doing jumping jacks on his di-

“cmon cutie I don’t have all night” he blurts, interrupting your thoughts. you never get up so fast in your nineteen years of living. he goes straight back to his original position, laid on his back. he may act chill,but he’s internally pleased and aroused.

as you go down on him (again), your two hands get a grip of the band of his black boxer and pull it down, his semi-hard cock immediately springs out. you can’t help but to give it a tiny peck before giving it a few strokes as you point it towards your lips

you open the bottle up with a pop, squirting out enough lube on your fingers before gently spreading it on his tip. he hisses as he feels the cold liquid substance being applied to him. you trace the sides of his length, ensuring the reduction of friction.

he grabs your arm, guiding your body to lay down sideways next to him. a tattooed veiny arm from behind snakes around your torso, clasping your upper body.

“ready?” he whispers, as he nibbles your ear. jungkook earns longingly nods from you, and for a split moment he spreads some liquid using his lubricated tip around your private area before slowly inserting it in. you discern the penetrating sensation in your core, which makes you purr.

he continues to penetrate inside you furthermore, causing you to close your eyes and tighten your clasp on his arms as you bear with the ache. he fully aware of how you’re feeling as he’s also having a hard time moving in.

“bare with me baby” tensely reassuring you. “so t-tight, fuck.” his other arm makes its journey below your nightgown, traveling its way to your perky breast, delicately squeezing one of them. jungkook does the same and gives the attention to the other one. simultanously, he plants a few smooches on the skin behind your ear, attemping to distract you from the pain. you quietly release moans and groans as he continues. he’s inches in when he feels your wall clenching around him.

your tight pussy becomes jungkook’s personal paradise. it’s the way your walls are clenching around him is better than he imagined; unmatched from all the fantasy he creates in his mind about you.

“koo.. “ your fingers tracing the veins on the back of his palm.

“what? my baby can’t handle it? tell me and I’ll stop” he softly asks. a tear just drops from you leg but you’re too tired to even react.

“n-no just stay inside, i’m sleepy” and with that, you instantly drift to sleep.

he hums, a hand that was busy playing on your chest shifts to caress your hair. jungkook lays one last kiss at your temple.

“goodnight to you too my pretty girl, love you so much”

series m.list

[commandershepardvasfuckit]

Shameless porn of my Tav and Halsin some undisclosed amount of time after the end of the game.

Afab Tav getting a taste of Halsin’s rare dominant side and learning what happens to druids who spend too much time in wildshape

Just under 2k words

(I am a lazy human who writes fic in the notes app of their phone, please excuse dumb mistakes and minimal editing at times)

—————-

The first traces of dawn slip through the window as you were roused from your meditation. You feel Halsin’s hand glide down your side and come to a rest on your hip before pulling your hips firmly back into his.

While Halsin was always fairly forward about sex, the past few days especially had been something. It was not uncommon for one of you to approach the other just about everyday over it, but this was borderline excessive even for him.

Your thighs ached from straddling him many times the last couple days, or from wrapping them around his hips as he fucked you against the wall. It was not really a complaint, nor something you cared to stop, but it was an unexplained change in Halsin.

Even early in the morning, just after meditating, he was ready to go again.

“My heart” he sighs in you ear, “how is it possible that I want you more every day? Every time I lay eyes on you, you’re more beautiful than I remember. It overcomes me and I just need to hear you, taste you, experience you”.

You feel his erection pressing on your backside as he slowly grinds against you. His hand that rested on you hip sliding down to now sit just under your belly button, waiting on an invitation to move lower.

“My heart, how are you not tired or sore?” you ask, half joking and half truly wondering where this drive suddenly came from.

~

It started three days ago. While bending down to put away a few things in the kitchen in a low cabinet he swept up behind you, grabbing your hips with such force he nearly yanked you off your feet. “Such gorgeous hips” he murmured in your ear, his massive torso bent over yours, dwarfing you entirely “I need you. Now” he growled in your ear.

It was more worked up then you had ever seen him, his whole body heaved with every breath and word and his hands dug into your hips with clear intent.

“Then take me” you replied.

Halsin did not waste a moment. He swiftly hooked a finger into the waist of your pants and pulled them along with your underwear down in one fluid motion. One rough hand immediately slipped down your front between your legs to find your clit and begin rubbing it while the other found your breast. You felt the tip of his shaft seeking entrance to you and you rose to your tip toes to make it easier. He quickly found the entry he craved and sank his full length into you, causing you to bite back a yelp. Halsin was large in every aspect of his being, from his physical size, to his personality, to his emotions, to his cock and right now without any sort of warmup you were especially reminded of that.

This was much rougher than his usual self. Halsin usually preferred things on the firmer side, as did you, neither of you were exactly fragile and pushing limits had its fun, but this was something else all together. From the beginning his pace was brisk, a sort desperation to his movements as if he felt like he was going to explode if he did not have you right then and there. And you and never been so aroused.

You let out a moan as you relaxed and adjusted to him, letting do as he wished and enjoying his sudden forwardness. The moan seemed to spur him on, pushing him to thrust even deeper now that you had relaxed enough to fully accept his length and it felt incredible.

“Gods you feel so good, fuck” you moaned and swore he felt larger than previous times.

Halsin was very much a man of give and take, of slow methodical pleasure. This however, was more base, almost instinctual feeling in comparison.

His breath was heavy in you ear, a strong departure from his usual verbosity. Where he typically sung your praises instead you were met with growls and panting.

You were shoved into the cabinet over the course of his thrusting, the edge of the counter digging into your hips, Halsin’s torso flush against your back was keeping you pinned against the furniture, preventing you from moving, not that you wanted to be anywhere else. He kept his pace steady as he rubbed your clit and his teeth found the side of your neck, biting harder than he normally did, his nails dug into your breast where his hand was pinned between you and the counter.

Breathing was difficult from his weight pressing down on you, but it only seemed to intensify everything. Your breath came in shallow gasps as you felt yourself getting close, every stroke filling you fully and pushing you to the edge. A wordless whine crept into your voice mixed with short gasps, you did not know how much more you could take, but you wanted this to last as long as possible.

This directness from him, the lust, the dominance, it was such a different side of him. Before Halsin, you had been the dominant one in all your encounters, then with Halsin while you swapped who was in the lead you would not say either of you was truly dominant. This though? This reminded you of an animal in heat; intense, rough, not just a want but a visceral need driven by something subconscious. Being desired so carnally, at such a base level lit a fire in your belly in a way few other things ever had.

Your finish washed over you, an intense buzz that started between your legs and dispersed through every inch of your body. You howled and panted his name like you never had before.

Halsin continued his relentless pace and pulled you closer to him even. His breathing was ragged and hot on you neck and you were suddenly acutely aware of how small you felt compared to him as you basked in the afterglow and tried to catch your breath.

“Fuck me full” you told him, “make me feel every last drop”.

This seemed to put him over the edge, he pumped into you hard, nearly enough to knock the breath out of you and moaned loudly.

You did feel it, every drop flooding into you and dripping down your leg, every twitch of his cock as he met his release. Halsin remained in you, gasping for air and coming back down to the ground.

Air flooded your lungs as he leaned his weight off you and his kisses peppered your back and shoulders. You straightened yourself out and assessed the state you were in: bruises marked your hips where you were bent over the counter, nail marks dug into your breast, and you were certain you had bite marks on your neck. Not that any of it mattered, you loved seeing his marks on your body.

“I’m not complaining, but that was… intense” you broke the silence.

“I’m sorry my love, I just needed you so badly” he wrapped his arms around you and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“Oh don’t apologize, it was incredible. I didn’t know you ever got like that. You were so dominant, so, I don’t know? Instinctual? I don’t know if that’s the right word but I have never been so turned on”.

“Oh!” He said in surprise, “well, in that case, I can definitely promise you more”.

~

Over the next 3 days it continued much the same. Any time you bent over, or showed much skin, or really did much of anything there was Halsin, begging you to let him fuck you. Every ask was tinged with heavy desperation and lust previously unknown to you, and the moment you let him it was a torrid of rough sex in the first position he could get you in.

You lay there now in bed, naked with his cock pressed against your backside. Your legs are sore, your back is sore, every bit of you inside and out is on the verge of raw.

“My love, my heart, I am loving all of this but I concede, I can’t keep up. What’s come over you?” you ask.

“Come over me? No this is pretty normal for now” he answers.

“Normal? For now?” you ask again.

“Yes, this time of year is typically mating season for bears” he said matter of factly, as if that was all the explanation that was needed.

“You aren’t a bear”.

“No, but you spend enough time as one and the instincts start to stick around afterwards”.

At this point you could not tell if he was serious or not. The whole thing was so matter of fact, but you had never heard anything about wildshape affecting a Druid like that.

You took a deep breath to gather your thoughts before beginning “Alright, so, right now you-“

“Want to fuck you against every surface in this house and surrounding forest until my scent covers every inch of you and you’re carrying our child. If you’ll let me”.

“And you remember that that’s not possible right? Even long before I met you I’ve been too stabbed and banged up to ever be able to carry a child. Something I’ve told you and that you said that you were alright with”.

“I’m aware, but instinct is instinct and I’m more that happy to try. Especially if that means we’ll just try forever”.

That answer satisfied you.

“I can be happy with that. But one last thing my love”.

“Anything. Say the word and there’s no length I wouldn’t go to fulfill your wish”.

“Find some positions that don’t hurt my thighs so much. Because if you pin me to the wall again there’s no way my legs are going to hold out”.

Halsin let out a deep laugh, a true and joyous laugh. “My love! I wished you had said something sooner! My thinking isn’t the clearest right now but if I had known-“ out of the corner of your eye you saw the gentle warm glow of healing magic as the hand that had been resting just under your bellybutton moved to your sore legs, “I would have helped with that”.

Much of the soreness and ache recedes as the soft glow fades.

“Actually one more thing, there’s been a few times I’ve been a little raw- uh- inside from all of this. Is there anything that can be done…?” you trail off.

“Yes! There are a few things I can make, perhaps a salve that provides some extra lubrication and maybe something a bit cooling feeling? I could do that, would that work?”

“I think so, and I’d be more than happy to try at any rate”

You feel him press your hips back against his and the throb of his still erect cock on your skin.

“Out of bed. Now. Salve first, trying to breed me after”.

Halsin sighs, not like he could complain about anything. He stumbles a bit as he attempts to pull his pants on, any attempt at salve making would require getting ingredients from the forest and town, and one of those requires pants.

“And love!” you call as he walks out the door, “If that salve works and you keep me from being so sore I’ll start wearing a shorter dress around the house with no panties, or maybe just nothing at all. I’ll give you blanket permission for the season to fuck me whenever you want, like nature intended”.

You had never seen Halsin move so fast to go get the shopping done.

[morganbritton132]

Idk why this popped into my brain but it occurred to me that Eddie was probably on those celebrity editions of game shows. Celebrity Jeopardy, Celebrity Who Wants to be a Millionaire, etc…

And it just made me laugh so hard. The idea of Eddie Munson with Regis. Of calling Steve as a phone a friend for a basketball question and Steve being like Eddie I don’t know everything about basketball. But the answer is Larry Bird.

Just TikTok finding clips of Eddie yelling “suck it, Dan Cortese!” after obliterating them all at final jeopardy.

This fills me with so much joy! I love it so much.

Eddie does not go on Celebrity Who Wants to be a Millionaire by choice. He pissed off the band’s manager just enough that they signed him up for it without his knowledge, and he’s not doing it. He got the letter in the mail and it’s not happening.

Eddie ‘Six Years of High School’ Munson is not going on national television and making himself look like an idiot when he doesn’t even get to be in on the joke. No way.

“Dick move, man,” Gareth shrugs after Eddie put his foot down. “Even if you fuck the first question, they’re still gonna donate to your charity of choice. And like, maybe this is just the amount of money needed to cure cancer. Or epilepsy.”

“…You fucking suck, Gareth.”

“Yeah, I do!”

Eddie begrudgingly shows up and goes through the whole rigmarole to get mic’ed up, just ready to make a fool out of himself and call it a day. It turns out that he knows a lot more than he thought he did because he breezes through the first round of questions.

He knows enough about history, music, and the arts just from planning his D&D campaigns and reading about things he likes. He’s surprised by how much surface knowledge he’s gained from listening to the kids logic their way through their science and math homework, but sports are a bust.

He gets lucky on a few questions, but ends up using his Phone a Friend to call his partner, Steve. Steve and Eddie spend the first fifteen seconds arguing about how Eddie shouldn’t have wasted his phone a friend on Steve because he doesn’t know anything. And then once he hears the question, he’s like, “Larry Bird” and hangs up.

Eddie doesn’t win a millionaire dollars for his charity, but he wins quite a bit.

Afterwards when he’s still so hyped up about not being dumb, Steve’s just like ???? “Ed, you were never dumb. You just had trouble taking tests and none of your teachers accommodated your very obvious ADHD. You’ve always been brilliant.”

“Now everybody knows it.”

“Yeah,” Steve agreed. “Yeah, they do.”

Eddie signs up for Celebrity Jeopardy himself.

One of the first things that Steve and Wayne bonded over was a love for Jeopardy. Wayne has watched Jeopardy before he left for work for as long as Eddie has known him, and Steve was more than happy to sit with him when it was on. They both continued to watched even after Steve and Eddie moved to Chicago and sometimes they’d call each other if Final Jeopardy was “crazy.”

The band wasn’t touring as much as they used too and they’re all pretty much working on their own projects at this point. Steve’s finishing up his master’s degree while teaching full time and doesn’t really have a lot of time for him. Eddie is in between projects and creatively tapped out, and worst of all, he’s bored.

So when his manager passively mentions Celebrity Jeopardy, Eddie tells him to sign him up for it. When they accept his application, the only people he tells about it are Dustin and Nancy.

He only tells them because he wants their help studying for it because he wants to win this time. So, they study and it sucks. If Eddie ever sees another world famous Nancy Wheeler flashcard again, he’ll tear off his arm. He hates every second of their study sessions.

Eddie makes it through the quarterfinals and then he makes it to the semi-finals (knocking out Dan Cortese). He doesn’t win the tournament because he bets big on a Daily Double and gets it wrong, but he’s fairly close to the lead after Final Jeopardy.

It’s not bad for a guy that failed his senior year three times.

The fun part comes when it airs. He painstakingly sets up their camcorder so Steve won’t notice it before the show starts. The video he gets has a good five minutes of Steve fussing with a blanket up until they say ‘Eddie Munson.’

Steve looks up and then looks at Eddie, and then back at the tv, “Wha- what? Is that – that’s you! You’re on Jeopardy! Eddie, you’re on – oh my god, we’ve got to call Wayne.”

Before Steve can even do that, their phone is ringing and Steve answers it like, “HE DIDN’T TELL ME EITHER!” while Eddie is laughing his ass off.

When Eddie posts a TikTok about it like, ‘LOL remember when I was on Jeopardy?’ it includes this moment. It also includes footage from the semi-finales where Steve is just pacing the living room and repeatedly telling Eddie to just tell him if he won or not. Steve cheers like he’s at a football game when Eddie wins.

It’s just as tense when the video cuts to Steve watching the finale. Steve knows the answer to the daily double that Eddie gets wrong and is like, ‘This is why they should do Jeopardy Couples, we’d win so hard.’ Steve’s not even disappointed that Eddie lost, keeping the same enthusiasm through the show and then is like, “I’m married to a Jeopardy contestant. I’m so telling Janet about this at the staff meeting tomorrow.” 

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 08/01/2024

You Are Book Smart

Season 7 Featured on: Rips of Christmas Present

Ripped by circunflexo

Tentative rip name: You Are Book Smart

I'd like to wish a late happy Jay Eazy day to all who celebrate, I hope you spent your time together with your dogs like Mega Man fr fr

Okay, but, like, sincerely, I like many others have over the last year been completely enamored with all the edits and attention given to Jay Eazy, and the frankly hilarious promotions he does for his music. The guy's a rapper in a sea of others but is frankly a marketing genius - he attaches popular games and anime to his songs, such as Grand Theft Auto, Demon Slayer, or indeed Mega Man, and promotes them through TikToks that are so absurdly strange that your only logical reaction is to laugh. In 2023, he struck absolute gold, and Mega Man went absolutely viral - after, of course, it dropped on January 7th.

There's just something so inherently funny about Jay Eazy that's...hard to describe, especially if you haven't been down the rabbithole of edits people have done of the Mega Man promo video. Be it the setup of Jay Eazy dropping in on someone else's grief to promote his music whilst running away from them, The Very Perculiar Way That His Captions And Tweets Are Written‼️, or just the corny sound to the songs themselves - Jay Eazy is immensely fun to post about, and post about him SiIva did, just one day ago. January 7th, 2024, was dedicated entirely to the king of money smarts himself - and of all rips posted, You Are Book Smart became my favorite just about immediately.

The thing is, we've had a lot of rips, and even some events, kind of similar to Jay Eazy Day already. Rap mashup rips, from Yoshi's Cookie World to Loopdeloop Griddy, aren't exactly a rare sight on SiIvaGunner, and just earlier in Season 7 we received a sequel to Whip & Nae Nae Day, with amazing rips like Whip Fortress (coincidentally ALSO by circunflexo!). There's of course uniqueness to all of these rips due to the sheer personality and expressiveness inherent to rap as a music genre, but it does still mean that the rips that try to truly stand out from the crowd are the ones that end up sticking with me the most. And compared to a lot of the other hip hop rips on SiIva, the big benefit that Jay Eazy has enjoyed for me is that he's had a whole year to simmer in my mind - I know the bars to Mega Man completely off the top of my head through no choice of my own, at this point.

All that is to say, that Circunflexo's call to make a rip that specifically plays with the lyrics and flow of Mega Man, sentence mixing it into new bars entirely - is absolutely damn brilliant. You Are Book Smart, through the edits in the lyrics and the sheer whimsy in the original song's beat, transforms a song originally about bragging over riches and dames, into Jay Eazy proudly boasting about his intelligence in perhaps the funniest ways you'll have ever heard. The kind of monotone quality that Jay Eazy's vocals have lend themselves to absolutely fantastic, near seamless sentence mixing, and the jokes just write themselves from there.

"I'm book smart, I'm money smart - I'm more intelligent, Call me Mr. Smart Festival, I got hella books"

It has no right to work as well as it does - and yet, Jay Eazy, the king himself, pulls through. Even if I wasn't blown away by every rip of the event, it was absolutely fun the entire way through, and you can really tell the SiIvaGunner team loves Jay Eazy as much as the rest of us: the cherry on top being the edited opening, that persists in almost all rips of the event. Jay Eazy's typical introduction of spelling out "S-R-G", was across the entire event edited across all rips to say "S-G" - SiIvaGunner. Even for a meme this silly and dumb, the amount of effort put in was, frankly, admirable. What a start to 2024: and Season 8 is just around the corner!!

[haupkmn]

I need a space to kinda yell for a bit. Please don't turn this into a joke or repost it. I have nowhere else I can really say this.

Most of this started by me not understanding that a "break" meant wanting to cut ties but in a way that seems softer, I guess? Social cues aren't my strongest skill and this sounds stupid but I don't understand boundaries because nobody respects mine. This goes for online stuff and IRL friends and family.

I probably shouldn't be publicly spiraling on here because it'll be screenshot without my permission/consent and taken out of context but a lot of this situation has fucked with my perception of reality & how boundaries work and it feels really dumb saying that.

When I say I have a boundary around being blocked, I'm not saying "nobody is allowed to block me", that's not fair and not a boundary. What I mean is, if someone who's close to me wants to stop being friends and cut contact, I'd like it if we could talk things out, leave no hard feelings and say goodbye so I don't worry about someone stalking me for the next five years.

The same thing goes for screenshotting me without asking. I first started asking that not because I have anything to hide, but because my longterm stalker found a private Facebook page of mine that was mostly my family, screenshot a photo of me when I was a kid in revealing clothing and edited my skin white.

I don't want to explain why certain things upset or bother me since being triggered by something is stupid apparently?? I don't know. Whenever someone accuses me of something I blatantly didn't do or I copy their actions after they do it, I'm always the one who's wrong and it's frustrating.

This is so stupid, but I feel so torn into thinking I'm someone evil and disgusting who only wants to hurt others because people keep assuming I want that, or some sort of attention when I don't.

Even if I don't completely remember them, I know I did hurt people but I would never doxx them or contact their families. I had to get the information I got at the time because someone threatened to contact my abuser, who they know has attacked me and I just desperately wanted a restraining order. I want to be left alone.

I keep offering proof but I can't think of any other way to say that I didn't do it when people tear off the context and lie about their actions. If I really attacked someone at somewhere I got employed the next year, I wouldn't be employed there to begin with.

This whole thing just. sucks. I don't want to say its not fair that people are cutting ties, I'm more jealous than anything because it's not fair that they get to leave me when I'll always be stuck with me, and when I die, I'll always be with me. There's no escaping me but me. I want to improve, I want to get better and I know I can but nobody fucking listens to me.

I don't want to be a joke anymore, I never wanted to be a "stalker" or an abuser. I'm tired of people turning me into the world's worse inside joke and threatening me with a lie to stay quiet about their wrongdoings. I don't get how people think it's funny to make fake pride flags about me or joke about someone raping me for years.

Most of the time I'm a people pleaser, in the end I want as many people to be happy as they can be. I want others to feel safe in general and around me but I also want the chance to defend myself without sounding like a huge creep but that feels impossible without overstepping someone's boundaries that I don't get.

The harassment isn't intentional, I just want to defend myself against someone lying about me abusing my dog, or me hurting children, or giving out someone's phone number or whatever the new lie of the week is. I don't mean to make anyone scared or uncomfortable, I just don't know how else to say what I need to without overstepping without meaning to overstep.

[triglycercule]

yall..... more jkfashionau fanart,,,,,, fromgshaewru,,,,, the goat..... THIS IS SO FUCKING CYTE!!!!! TH LITTE ICE CREAMZ???? GHE ICE CREAM IS SHAPED LIKE A BUNNY. IT HAS LITTLE KITTY EARS. HORRORS ICE CREAM ID CRYING!!!!!!!!!! THATS SO FUCKING CUTE,,,,,,,, (an is that supposed to be a dogm dog coded horrrot real theyre literally rabbit cat dog trio) AND THEY LOOK SO HAPPY AND KILERS :3 FACE they're absolutely gonna share ice cream flavors except horror's stingy but also greedy for dust an killer's and they had to get a her a spoon and count her spoonfuls so she doesn't just eat their whole ice creams and AND MY GOD TJIS IS SO FUCKING ADORABLE!!!! THIS IS SO CUTR AND SWEET AND LOVELY AND JK FASHION MTT MY BELOEBD MY BELOBED!!!! ⁉️⁉️‼️‼️ OH MY GOD WAIT IS THE LIKE,,,,, A FOLLUIP TO THE OTHER DRAWING I MADE WHER THEH WERENT RUNNING TO TBE CIE CREAM SHOP,,,,,,,,,, OH YM DODDDD IF IT ITS FUCK THSBK YKU SO MUCH THIA SO CUTE what happened yo dyst in the second ohoto ⁉️⁉️⁉️ why did she literally DIE???? her poor precious fave GET UPPP QUEEN GET UOPPPPP THEYRE DRAGGING YOU IN THR QRTS. THEY lion SO FUCKING CUTE in the srcond one like the massive fotball heads are so adorable i fear. its so cut its so cute. straight out of an anime ending ITS SO CUTE and horror's surpirsed reaction and killer little wave I CAN JUST IMAGINE LIKE A DISTANT (aaaaaa) COMING FDOM HER THATS SO CUTEEEEE. dust collasped after they ran to the ice cream shop that one time no doubt i can make it canon im literally the creator so boom i just made it canon. and the stupid fucking third picture. they look so dumb i could punch them. they look like baseball bats. ping pong thingys i forgot the little whackers. lets play tennis with the mtt rackets i pick dust!what was that traced over???? i feel like one of those korean artist reaction photos would work

gshaewru hits me AGAINwith another wave of art. a second plane has appeared (triglycercule. 9/11 jokes are not a safe topic to joke about no matter how funny you find it. i know i know triglycercule,,,, i'll lay off,,,,,,) and once again it is ADORABLE AND SILLY. jk mtt-y. theyre so damn cute my little candies i will eat then and chew them like gum and they will taste delicious. notice the difference between when i spoke about normal mtt and jk mtt. that's because jk mtt are GIRLS CUTE GIRLS they dont deserve to be used as tennis rackets compared to the murderer three over there,,,,, smh

edit: i've just been informed THIS is the fuckass base 😭😭😭

[micecakes]

Alright here we go, I haven't done this in years but decided to do it this year as a kinda roundup of some of the best games I've played this year and why I picked them, my kinda criteria for picking them is they have to be games I've actually finished, and actually came out this year, I don't usually include ports but remakes do make it in for me, and there will be a section near the bottom for games I did like a lot but didn't actually come out this year, so uhh let's get started i guess gonna get the Triple A junk out of the way first I think, so first off:

Spider-Man 2, rly liked the first one and the Miles Morales games and this one just continued on the story and whatever, it improved on a lot of things over the first game and I think it ended up just being more enjoyable overall, plus like, 19 inches of Venom and whatever, villains maybe weren't as good as the previous game but there was some rly good gameplay sections with some of them, tho once again i felt like the sidequests fell a bit short but they did at least have boss fights and more villain stuff in them so that was good, good game 👍

okey, game 2 is

Pikmin 4, and no i'm not editing this picture thank u, pretty much the best one in the series? just good overall and even tho i didn't 100% it i'm pretty sure the bonus mode you get is just a mini remake of the original game so that's cool, overall really good, definitely dragged near the end tho and kinda felt like it was going on too long, but still good, this was also like the only major Nintendo release of this year i played for more than like, an hour lol, outside of one dlc game 3 be:

Final Fantasy 16, this one is weird because I both loved and hated it at the same time, not rly much to say about it other than its the worst 10/10 video game i've ever played, it has some of the highest highs in anything i've ever played and its offset by some of the most boring shit in the world that made me want to eat my own head at times, it's good but it's also shit, it also runs like absolute ass for no reason and square enix were convinced it was totally 100% fine and didn't need to be patched and even when they did it still didn't fix it, there's literally no way I can sell anyone on this game, play Asura's Wrath instead 👍 okey i guess 4&5 are kinda gonna be rolled into one so:

Dead Space and Resident Evil 4 Remakes, both really good remakes of really good video games, but at the same time don't really replace the original versions? there's both no reason to play these over the OG releases but they're also different enough that it's fine for both original and remakes to exist, so worth playing if you like the original releases, i guess the only complaint i have is they cut out operation Ada and seperate ways from RE4 remake and then sold it back to us as dlc, but its actually more complete than the original version and worth the price i think, still annoying but hey, modern videos games babey

ok i guess next is like "non triple A games" and weird games that I enjoyed, not all of these are indie games but they're not triple A stuff so? 🤷

Robocop: Rouge City, its basically Robocop 2.5 the movie the video game, it's kinda jank, it's kinda slow to be expected but it's pretty fun and funny just seeing Robocop interact with people and then like, grab people off their motorcycles and throw them into exploding barrels, it's dumb it's good it rly captures the 80s jank of Robocop pretty well 👍 next is technically a game that didn't come out this year but it did because literally no one uses apple arcade so

Air Twister, this is probably the fucking weirdest game i've played in a very long time, i went in expecting to play a modern Space Harrier instead i got a lock on style shooter with a soundtrack that is just some band emulating Queen songs, no joke, i was just blown away the whole time at what was happening, it wasn't until i died and ran out of credits that i ended up in the games main menu which had so much stuff i was just clicking menus for about 20 mins and kept discovering more and more video game nonsense to play and unlock, SUPER weird, pretty fun, Yu Suzuki why did you release this on apple arcade originally and WHAT were you on when you made this sir, good job next i guess is

Graze Counter GM, an updated/sequel to Graze Counter, one of the first Shmups i've gotten in to and it's just really fun, loads of characters, about 8? stages to play, good basic gameplay mechanics, bunch of different difficulties and options to play with and it's just a lot of fun for a 20 min ish run through the game, def inspired me to play more shmups and get better at them, good game next we finally got some FPS games

Warhammer 40k Boltgun, classic boomer shooter style game, very stompy and heavy feeling but also really fast and fun, really enjoyed how colourful the game is and the fact there's a dedicated taunt button that does nothing by make you crack your knickles and yell things, only major complaint i had was there wasn't enough boss variety and one of the is kinda straight bs some of the time, but for the most part it was a lot of fun, also corvus helmet best helmet 👍 more FPS gamign which was a semi recent release?

Sprawl, it's currently on sale but its cheap anyways, from the banner art alone you can tell the dev is a MGS and Ghost in the Shell fan, and playing the game you can tell that too somewhat, really fun really gritty and pretty fast paced, has controllable slomo bullet time which is now something I love in games?? soundtrack is good and yeah, it's just good, really cool aesthetically has that very gritty industrial kowloon walled city cyberpunk look and feel to it and very satisfying to play, really good. last thing for games this year is a DLC

I really like the Xenoblade Chronicles series, and the XB3 dlc is a really good final wrap up of the game, lots of fanservice in the good way and just plays well and is fun, ties up a lot of story junk you'd want to know, I still think the XBC2 dlc is the best playing XBC thing but this is very good and just very fun, can't say too much without spoiling anything in the series lol but I enjoyed it a lot after finishing off XBC3 ok halfway there (joke) :^) next is games that didn't come out this year but I did play and really liked sooo

I got into racing games i guess around this time last year, I picked up Gran Turismo 7 in maybe January or February and played it a lot since, not the most exciting game or best or feature full but it has stuff that I like, and as a result has gotten me more into cars, car games and just made me better at it, had a lot of fun and the big update they did semi recently has just made the game better yehaw time??

not really much to say about Evil West other than it's what a new xbox 360/PS3 era action game would be like, just without the jank and with more convenience, not afraid to be cheesy and dumb its just a standard level based action game where you're a techno cowboy kinda guy fighting vampires, it's good it's fun and it's not that hard 🤠 nya:

one of the first games I played this year was Stray cuz i got it in an early sale, I had no real idea what to expect and I enjoyed every moment of it, really good aesthetics and design and an interesting post apocalypse style world you get to explore, you really end up caring about all the robot people and the cat and everything, also you get a meow button so its good 😺 more FPS game

I'd always seen this game just never picked it up, I think Severed Steel is one of my favourite FPS games ever now, the main story/campaign is only about 3 hours long, i beat it in one sitting and i think my face hurt when i was done because i was just grinning and laughing like an idiot the whole time because of how fun it was, there's also a bunch of extra modes to keep playing, the music is good and just everything about the game is fun which was my main takeaway from it, i didn't care that it was short I cared because of how much fun i had, highly recommend if you like sliding into guys, stealing their weapons and blasting them with it before they hit the ground, and with controllable bullet time if you want that too 👍👍 in a similar vein to the above, i guess the oldest game on this list is:

Outrun 2006: coast 2 coast, its the home port of Outrun 2, which includes Outrun 2 and a bunch of extra stuff, similar to Severed Steel this is just the most fun I've had with a racing/car game, it doesn't matter that i'm not super into Ferraris or that it's not realistic or whatever, it's just pure fun, and I don't have to spend a million dollars at the arcade to keep playing, so that's good woa you made it to the end!!!!!!! but wait!!! I played a lot of games this year, and even tho what I said about the previous ones was true, it was kinda hard for me to pick an actual game of the year, i did enjoy a lot of stuff but it didnt feel like anything stood out to me SO much that it deserved a "best game of the year" position for me, so the closest thing to that was:

Armored Core 6: Fires of Rubicon, hit a lot of plus points for me, I liked that I had to play the game 3 different times for different endings and a true end type thing, i did get frustrated early on but i kept coming back to play more, it def felt more of an action game than a mech game but customizing and messing with builds to get through fights was fun, tank legs thank u, it was also a similar situation to when elden ring came out, and everyone was playing it at the same time and sharing tips and builds and stuff which felt rly cool and nice and added to the whole experience, my only complaint is i wish it just had an option to start a second save file and do it all again, but oh well. and that's it! there's a bunch of stuff I didn't include in this, but i think this list is good enough for now, maybe next year this'll be a youtube video instead? I hope next years games are just as good, if not better, but even if they're not there's still a lot to play and explore 🐁🐁

[hell0mega]

so i finally watched the Barbie movie, and it was... good. like, i really enjoyed myself, it's very funny, it's acted well, it LOOKS amazing.

but... am i the only one who feels like the script should've had, like... another good month or two to cook?

and i don't mind the lack of explanation. like, it never explained why Barbieland is this, like, weird demiplane connected to Earth and the Barbies are real and not only can they go to the real world and function basically as people, but real people can also travel to Barbieland. it was one of those things where i could easily go, yeah, sure, whatever. like, maybe they could've fleshed that out a bit, but it didn't distract me enough to say that would be necessary

but I'm talking about the actual plot, and the message of the film. it felt... clunky. I've seen people criticize it for being "intro feminism" but i don't even think it's that. i want to watch it again and have a more detailed and in depth analysis, but i remember a few things that bothered me. the idea that the deconditioned barbies used their wiles to make the kens jealous and turn on each other in order to defeat them felt... bad. the way the film said "manipulative women win" felt SO icky, especially how that was just kind of accepted and worked just fine and wasn't called out. and the way that Ryan's Ken was like "i thought it was all about horses anyway" yet the concept of men finding community with each other over common interests was never seen as a positive topic to explore, and it just all came down to oppressing the Barbies.

the whole movie implied that this is what the world would be like if the roles were reversed, right? if women were the one in charge and men were put down and subservient. yet all the kens were dumb, and ignorant, and only cared about the attention from their Barbies. and at the end, president Barbie said "maybe things shouldn't go back to the way things were" and the film recognizes that the kens were bad off... but then made the joke that they were "not ready" for equal representation? "maybe someday" a ken can be in the supreme court, but for now, they have to learn, and they're gonna have to work their way up. if we flip that metaphor and apply it to real life, flip the roles... that feels disgusting. you can't have a reverse metaphor and put down men at the same time. the reason why women haven't had equal rights is exactly this narrative, that they weren't "ready," that they were ignorant or dumb, that they wouldn't use their rights or power "correctly," and that's exactly what the film said about the kens. and it was a joke! funney!!!

it felt like they had this basic idea for the movie and did the worldbuilding centered on the fact that they're dolls and ken is just There while they're a million barbies with a bunch of different careers. and then when they tried to come up with a story, they had to shoehorn in the feminist stuff... and it just did not land for me. if they wanted this to have been a feminist piece for the ages, they should've started there.

I'm actually surprised at the lack of analysis and criticism I've seen of the actual story of the movie. I'm sure it's out there, but i haven't done across it. i know this was written just after covid, and it was written during the worst time to be a writer if we consider the timing of the strike. but... i still wish it had been edited. i think it would've fared much better had they've consulted with feminist and gender study scholars. i think it would've led to a much better lesson and a much tighter script.

[ashen-sky]

Red vs. Blue: Restoration

Writing this as I watch, Spoilers ahead

Doc and Wash's conversation feels like an exposition dump, and I can't tell if it's because Wash is being interrogated or the dialogue really is that clunky.

THE AIS ARE BAAAACK. Also poor Tucker, being conscious through it all and knowing Sigma wants to kill him.

I feel like Church's animated explanation feels kind of out of place, not because it's not something he would do but because it feels so modern compared to where the Chorus reds and blues left off. Like it feels more like a dig at the audience than a joke in universe because up until this point they got by with verbal explanations. It would have felt more natural for Church to day "Since we don't have time for you guys to not understand, I made a video" instead of "Since no one can understand anything without fast moving pictures" (or whatever the exact line was).

Also, Church's inability to predict what Caboose says is so funny.

This whole thing is just Valhala and the hunt for the director all over again. Which is fine because at least there's no cyclops. This isn't a complaint, just an observation.

Anyways Church should have withheld Omega, not the memories of why combining is such a dumb idea. Like, one of the pieces that build the basis of his sanity (I.e Delta, Theta, ect.)

Was the pilot supposed to be 479er?

Lmao, Simmons getting "Shut up Caboose"'d and Caboose apologizing.

Caboose still has the confetti gun!

"It looks more like they're making fun of the last four years, which is fine because that's what it started as" -my dad, who I agree with when you look at it like that

Anyways, that was prompted by the security team working from home, which was a funny bit

It was 479er! Pretty sure the VA is different, do love her re appearance.

Love Tucker taking control, Caboose telling him not to blame himself, and Sarge going back was a really nice sequence.

... THEY KILLED SARGE, NOOOOO. I mean, I guess it's character growth for him but... the idiots were all supposed to leave together.

Why does Blood gultch look a bad 3D rendering?

Griff finally got discharged and he stuck around!

It kind of feels like this was roo focused on being the end. Like that campfire scene? It was cute, and the memories were nice, but it felt too final.

Nothing will beat Church's hero speech, but Caboose's speech? The story of Allison and memory? Definitely a favorite

It's also fitting that Tex and Carolina took Meta down, along with the reds and blues, because the Meta exists because of them. And it tormented them. It was their closure, and Carolina getting to fight with her mother made it necessary and not just a rehash of Alpha letting Tex go and the director dying. Also, Tex finally got to do what she wanted. She got to choose her fate.

Also, that twist with Doc made that clunky conversation make more sense. Seeing the freelancers made me happy, and holy fuck finding out Doc was dead was sad.

Wait, I never saw past s16, is one a reference to something? Also, one sounds like 479er, is that the real 479?

Tucker’s after credit scene was sweet... Bow-Chika-Bye now!

All in all, this wasn't a bad finale. I definitely think it would have been better as episodes because the tone wasn't consistent enough for a movie, those Wash bits early on felt a bit shoehorned in. But I don't really think anyone's characters were butchered, even Sarge dying is understandable.

Red vs Blue is about cycles, and this put an end to them all. The AIs are gone, Wash isn't letting the memories of the dead control him, Sarge isn't stuck in endless search of battle, and Griff is free of the military.

The show definitely isn't worse off with this finale, and the memory speeches (both Caboose's and Carolina/Wash's halucinations), are definitely in the top 3 with Church's hero speech for me. I am kind of glad they did this though, because the end of s13 did sort of imply that the AI fragments would be back and this finally and truly put them to rest.

EDIT: I FORGIT THE MOST IMPORTANT PART! Tex being able to kick Meta's ass because she was the Reds and Blues memory and not Alpha or Leonard's was a nice touch. I thought when Caboose was telling the story of Allison it was because it was such a huge driving force for Chruch, but it was because it was Tex and she needed to know who she was.

[adultswim2021]

Robot Chicken: Star Wars Episode II | November 16, 2008 - 11:30PM | Special

Time for more re-re comedy for gay nerds. Hey--HEY! That wasn’t very nice. Don’t say stuff like that! Okay. I am sorry. I forgive you. Thanks. 

Robot Chicken Star Wars! It’s one of my least favorite things. I ain’t never seen this stuff, and I wish I didn’t decide I had to watch it for a blog that no one reads. I wonder if I will do an exhaustive breakdown of each sketch? Um… HOW ABOUT NO. This shit sucks and just because it’s segmented doesn’t mean I have to be! Segmented, I mean.

Okay, so here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna rank my top three and bottom three sketches. This is going to be very hard, because I don’t like any of them, really. And, because I don’t like any of them, really, I will likely just be picking stuff borderline at random. Also, I skipped over some real short ones for consideration cuz who cares. Here, both lists are worst to best. 

BOTTOM THREE (WORST TO LEAST-WORST) 

Luke's Lack of Perspective. This is the one where Leia scolds Luke for being sad about Obi-wan dying because her whole planet was vaporized. The premise is lame, and also they cast the real Carrie Fisher, who has old lady voice and sounds nothing like her younger self. You can tell they pitched her up a little to try and make up for it. It’s just distracting, and the sketch isn’t even worth recasting.

AT-AT Drag Race. I couldn’t even really make much sense of this one. There’s a weird edit in it that I remember thinking implied that it was a dream? Which it wasn’t, obviously, it just was edited awkwardly and the joke is just “wouldn’t it be funny if guys raced AT-ATs?" and who gives a fuck. I did like the visual of the AT-AT clicking it’s heels, though.

Going Out Like a Punk. This is the one where Uhh. I forgot his name, no really. I almost typed “Cowboy Bebop.” The bounty hunter guy that everyone loves just because he has a cool name that I forget what it even is. Bop-Bop Peranu, I think it is. Anyway, he’s in the Sarlac pit (I remembered that no prob) and talking about how he didn’t go out like a chump. This one seems like it’s aimed squarely at annoying dorks who think they’re clever for making the same observation. I watch television to get away from shitheads like this! Cartoons, mostly, but still! 

[EVERY OTHER SKETCH IS TIED FOR THE MIDDLE]

TOP THREE (WORST TO FIRST)

 Palpatine's Trip. Depicting Palpatine's annoying travels to the Deathstar, paralleling the annoyances of regular Earthly air travel. He gets annoyed by the chair placement in the throne room, and as indignities mount he says, to some one, “here, watch me tempt fate. (mock exasperation) could this day get any worse? (casually) I think I’m safe, because I said that ironically.” The punchline is he gets tossed by Vader, like at the end of Star Wars: The Last Crusade. I just really like the tempting fate/irony joke!

Anakin's Happy Place. Decent premise depicting Anakin slaying children at the end of Episode III. It's the darkest scene in all of Star Wars, and I was fine with what they did with it here. The joke at the end is a little dumb, but it’s fine. It’s Robot Chicken.

Mouse Droid. My favorite, because I could imagine making a fan-edit of the original Star Wars with zero changes except you add the insert shots of the little mouse guy driving the droid. I like when mice drive stuff. That's basically the only reason I liked this.

This has an “extended” version available, but I just watched the version on HBOMax. This is probably worse than the first special, but I don’t want to think about it too long. All of these sketches are dumb as shit and for dorks, which I DEFINITELY am not one of. Go to hell!

EPHEMERA CORNER

Clerks: The Animated Series (November 14, 2008 - 11:00PM)

This could very easily be a whole goddamn thing. It will probably be longer than other EPHEMERA CORNERs, but I’ll still try to be concise. Clerks the Animated Series was an animated spin-off of Clerks, the scrappy, vulgar, independent comedy from Kevin Smith. It’s cult success lead to him inexplicably having a career, including two direct movie sequels to clerks. This cartoon only lasted six episodes, two of which aired on ABC. They came out on DVD shortly after, with a racist audio commentary track for every episode.

I literally taped the Super Bowl because a website reported that the Clerks Cartoon was going to get a commercial during it. I diligently taped the two episodes that did air. ABC decided to air the fourth episode, which was a parody of courtroom dramas (and had a very funny non-sequitur ending allegedly completed by the Korean animators without any input from the American writers). After that they decided to air the second episode, which heavily referenced the first episode. It’s main concept was that it was a clip show, and Dante and Randal spent a significant portion of the episode flashing back only to the first episode, which hadn’t actually aired. 

The show was a fairly typical animated comedy of it’s time. The vulgarity was tamped down in favor of absurdist gags and cultural references. Mostly, it worked. There were some really funny ideas, and the commentary tracks had some really fun tidbits about planned episodes that never happened. Honestly, if I weren’t already privy to the doomed nature of the show, or we lived in the alternate dimension where this was allowed to continue for multiple seasons, I would probably aspire to write for this thing. With a few exceptions, the humor was even more on my wavelength than Kevin Smith’s movies.

Weirdly, I don’t think I ever actually watched this show on Adult Swim. I remembered it as a Comedy Central acquisition. When Adult Swim first aired, I really admired the fact that one could watch Fox’s Sunday Night cartoon line-up, switch to Adult Swim, and then when Adult Swim was over you could switch to Comedy Central and watch reruns of South Park, Duckman, and this. It was a real special time to have cable. Hot damn.

I really do wish this lasted longer. Deserved at least half the success of Family Guy. In my ideal world, this show takes off and Kevin Smith stops making movies. He only revisits the "canon" View Askewinverse in occasional comic book mini-series. You ever read his comics? His writing style comes off better in those, I think.

PLEDGE: The currently-ignored Adult Swim 2022 blog will return on some kind of non-daily schedule. I’ll finish out Baby Blues, and then do this. Happy, KON?? 

MAIL BAG

Time for some mail. Good lord. 

you gotten the adult swim 2021 group dm all riled up about xtacles. are you gonna do anything to fan these flames???

I dropped some bombs Hulk style, and things seem to be under control. You are right, they were out of line and it pissed me off!

dino and scott are excellent as mr burns would say. i forgive anything in their problematic past as long as they become the banner, ta ta for now

Despite the fact that one of them was nice to me once, and the other one made out with my friend (which is arguably also nice), I simply can’t. I like racist stuff, so I’m keeping the Minor Guys or whatever that show was called. Bye!

cahpo

?

so far it seems the only shows you like are space ghost, assy mcgee, and xtacles. i guess venture bros and morel orel made you cry, if that's a good thing. Anyway, just a like observation from this looky loo. Bye!

It is sorta fucked up that a TV show can make people cry. Should be illegal. But, hey, look out for the end of the year when I rerank all the Adult Swim shows. BYE!

and we say bye bye now

Bye bye! 

Bye bye!

Goodbye.

[boysplanetrecaps]

Boys Planet, Episode 7 Recap Part 6: Not Spring, Love, or Cherry Blossoms

Ok, let’s tackle the next song from Episode 7 -- Not Spring, Love or Cherry Blossoms, originally by High4 and IU, and performed by three kind of underdog trainees. Click Read more or Keep reading or do whatever you gotta do, and let’s talk about this performance. 

At 1:18:19 of Episode 7, Huta calls up the next team, and everyone gushes over how nice they look. But the judges are worried, because these trainees are low skilled and/or low ranked.

They introduce themselves with some aegyo stuff, and almost immediately we cut back in time to rehearsal. So, as a reminder, our little sakura flowers are: 

Trainee name (rank)   Star Level test /Challenge 1 /age final star level

Lee Da Eul (13) Replay /Danger - K /18 🚫

Bak Do Ha (24) My House (Blue) /Hot Sauce - K /20 🚫

Jung I Chan (52) Mirotic /Danger - K /20 ⭐⭐

When we saw them in episode six, MNET gave them exactly one minute of screen time and used most of it to mock their past performances. You probably recognize all of them, but if you don’t, you’ll be given a recap of how I-chan lived his nightmare on stage in episode 4 and how Bak Doha is lowkey the laughing stock of SK right now, but like, in a good way. 

It’s also important to remember how Lee Da Eul really came across like a jerk when he refused to give up his main rapper position in Danger, and implied that since he had chosen the team, that their purpose was to support him as he excelled. I didn’t take it well, and I get the impression that other people didn’t either. I don’t think, for the record, that this is evil editing. Lee Da Eul really said that, and all MNET did was show it. Up until that point he’d been their darling, and only benefited from their editing, so it would be weird for them to turn on him for no reason at all. Nope, he said that stuff.  

But as irritating as it was, and as irritated as I was at the time, I’ve made the choice to forgive DaEul. He’s just a kid, and being so highly ranked at the beginning made him feel a little big for his britches. I wouldn’t want to be held responsible for dumb shit I said when I was 18 or 19, that’s for sure. So, let’s see what DaEul does with his second chance.   

So yeah, we pick up with the rehearsal, and Onestar, the younger male vocal trainer, is openly mocking the team, sarcastically calling them The Avengers. The trainees have kind of no choice but to laugh along as they’re being insulted by the adults who they depend on. Sigh. Then we get a recap of all their past terrible singing. 

The judges ask how Bak Doha ended up with the killing part, and we go to a flashback-within-a-flashback: part distribution. I-Chan, who as we will learn really does have a lovely singing voice and at least some understanding of music, tries to make the best he can of the situation, and distributes the parts as fairly and reasonably as possible considering that neither of his teammates can really sing. He seems pretty relaxed in his confessionals -- he doesn’t expect much from his team, but is still trying to do his best. 

Their part distribution is super “fair” -- I-Chan and DaEual are Main Vocal and Main Rapper respectively, and Doha has the killing part. Doha jokes that he’s happy to finally be able to put a star sticker on his shirt, after being a no-star this whole time. But if you look closely at his confessional he’s not wearing a star sticker. Hmm.

Back to rehearsal, where the boys run through the song. Wow, sometimes we catch a few moments of I-chan singing and it’s really great. He’s wearing an eyepatch, and when we see him in the interviews that eye looks a little red and swollen. I guess it’s just a sty, but those usually take two weeks to heal and this one seems to heal faster than that, because he doesn't end up performing with an eyepatch on.

Anyway, the judges don’t have much nice to say about their singing or performing, that we see. Instead, the judges focus in on part distribution. The boys say that they distributed the parts based on who they thought would do each part best. Bobby gives the confusing advice: “I think it’d be better to focus on your own color.” What the heck does that mean? I assume they talked more about it because it seems that the boys understand, but I sure don’t. 

In any case, the upshot seems to be that they need to redistribute the parts. They take the killing part from Doha and give it to Daeul, and Doha kind of cheerfully mourns the loss of the only star sticker he ever got. 

Then they give the main rapper position to Doha, taking it from Daeul. It seems like a good trade, really. When there’s only three of you on stage, the killing part doesn’t matter nearly as much. 

Also, Bak Doha seems like a really put-together guy with a good sense of proportion. He doesn’t get super upset about losing the killing part, but he’s honest enough to admit that it bugs him a little. It’s the worst when someone is like “really it’s fine!” and you know it is NOT fine. Instead, he makes it into a joke so people feel comfortable but it’s not this *secret*. 

In the interview, Daul murmurs that he’ll do his best with the Killing Part. Really, he’s barely audible. He always was kind of soft-spoken in interviews, but it’s kind of ridiculous at this point. Why are you whispering, Daul? Though I think we’ll sort of figure it out as the episode progresses.  

Now Bak Doha needs to write a rap, and says it’s hard, like he’s gathering dragon balls. I’m not making that up -- that’s what he says. Aww, Doha, why are you so lovable? Please go into acting. You can bring some of that lovability to set. Imagine Doha as the lead in a rom-com drama? I can see it. In any case, Doha stays up late at night to try to write his rap -- aww! Well, I never said he wasn’t hard working, because he obviously is. 

At dress rehearsal, the stage is decorated to look like a cute living room, and Doha jokes, “in the end, we ended up at My House.” All the judges laugh. I appreciate the self-deprecating humor -- I really hope it helps ward off embarrassment. I don’t want either of the Houses to wake up in the middle of the night for 10 years, feeling embarrassed. That’s what I do. Just, everything I’ve ever done, ever, on a random rotating carousel of embarrassment that spins past my eyes every time I try to sleep. Sigh. 

The judges also note that they like Doha’s speaking voice -- again, it’s almost as if Doha should go into ACTING? Doha’s rapping is basically what used to be called “sing talking.” As ph-1 notes, it’s utterly without swag, and yet somehow it’s nice to listen to. It’s the male version of the way Dahyun from Twice and Irene from Red Velvet rap. 

The performance

Link

The song basically is about someone who has barely noticed that it’s spring -- everyone around her is obsessed with the cherry blossoms and spring and love, but she’s alone, so she doesn’t want to talk about those things. So the lyrics are actually a little sad, as much as everyone implies that the song is relaxing or sweet.

Doha’s rap per this video:

There was nothing special, the drama ending was obvious anyway. It’s like a trauma repeated every day. What story do you want in the season ending soon? Not spring, love, or cherry blossoms, stop talking nonsense. Ay the world is second to none, not getting tired of it, spring full of warmth like a sweet dream, I need that, that it’s you.  

My take:

First off, stylist noona, you know that quote by Coco Chanel, “Before you send your trainees out on stage, take one giant bow off of them”? I think that’s how the quote goes, right? Anyway.

My goodness, but I-chan has a great voice. It’s textured, cleanly on pitch, just nice to listen to. He must have been sick or something during the first challenge mission, because it doesn’t even seem like the same person singing. He still has the same basic problem, though: his facial expressions. I-chan doesn’t have to smile like TaeRae to be a good stage performer, but he has to make eye contact with the camera and smile at least some of the time. He looks either kind of blank or sort of unhappy the whole time, and often turned away physically from the audience and camera. He either needs to practice facial expression in the mirror, or he needs to look into singing for OSTs or something. But really, he does have a great voice, and I’m so glad he had this second chance to show everyone what he can do. Good work, I-chan. 

DaEul and Doha have both improved their vocals markedly since when we first met them. It’s really a testament to the power of good vocal instruction that Doha can even find the note, since early on he really showed signs of being completely tone deaf. Neither is someone whose voice I’d specifically seek out to listen to, but both did a decent job. Doha’s talk-rapping works in its own way, which again shows why he should go into acting. And DaEul is well suited to this lighter, cuter concept. 

I think if I’d had that A/B button thing to press, I would have pressed A for all of them, since they all did what they set out to do. If I could only pick one, it’d be I-chan, of course. 

The edit: 

The edit is kind to all of them. The reactions from the judges, trainees, and audience all convince you that they’re good. Also, I love how LipJ just straight up wants to boink almost all the trainees. Get down with yourself, LipJ. 

The voting:

Oh, here’s where it happens. 

So, they’re going to reveal the third place person first, and when they see that the vote count for it is only 387 votes, Daul says, “It think it’s me.” 

Aww, jeez. 

The show doesn’t address it at all, no one actually says it out loud, but we, watching at home, know that the in-studio audience was just punishing him for that shit he pulled during Danger, and oof, and you can see that he’s just sort of… lifeless about it. Like, this is what’s happening, and he can’t do anything about it, now that everyone hates him. He just has to deal with it. His fall from grace was so hard and so sudden that it must feel almost unreal to him.

And you can see that both I-chan and Doha are on his side -- they both probably kind of knew that this would happen and they both are here to support him. Aww, poor kid. 

I don’t really follow BP news or gossip online because I’m usually behind and I don’t like to get spoiled, and the news will just pop up on my phone randomly if I start reading stuff about it online, so it’s just better to stay away. But I assume a lot of people felt the way I did when I was recapping Danger, and now they all hate Daeul. It kind of makes sense now why he’s been so subdued over this episode. That’s gotta really, really hurt, no matter whether he “deserves” it or not. I don’t know when anyone really “deserves” to be dogpiled by strangers on the internet. I mean, yeah, I wasn’t super kind to him in my recaps, but I also wasn’t sending him death threats. Jeez, people. 

I don’t hate Daeul. I hate how he behaved, and still strongly believe that that was not evil editing.  But I don’t hate him. I’m not that sorry that he fell in the rankings, because he isn’t as skilled as the other trainees, and if there is only a limited number of seats available, then I’d rather that they go to someone more deserving. But I do feel sad that the backlash he got was almost certainly not appropriate for his "crime." I don't know him, but it looks like he's internalized what happened and hopefully learned from it. I hope it doesn't haunt him forever.

In his interview, he says, “really, I…”, then exhales. Then the editors put him in slow motion for half a second so they can get a clean cut before he starts to speak again. I don’t know what he would have said, but whatever it was, MNET has decided not to let us hear it.

I do know what his pinned comment on his fancam says, though (filtered through google translate, of course): 

hello!! This is 🌕 Lee Da-eul 🌕 from the ""Spring is here but why am I alone"" class who came to take an introduction to love studies other than spring love and cherry blossoms!

First of all, thank you so much to all of you who came to see my fancam, which is still lacking! I have only this moment to tell my story to those who like me, so I think every word is precious to me!

Last time, I mainly listened to rap on BTS seniors' Danger stage, so this time, 'You can do vocals on a sweet and cute stage!' In order to make you think, I chose a stage other than spring, love, and cherry blossoms!

I promise myself every day that I only want to show a good side of myself, but there are things that are not delivered to the fans the way I want, so I feel bad that both the fans have had a hard time. I promise to always show my true self, and I would be grateful if the fans would clear up any misunderstandings and trust me!

Thanks to those who believe in me and love me as I am, I think I can endure and keep running! In order to repay that expectation, I will think only of you, think about, practice, and work hard for you! Haha, are you too lazy! I'm sorry that I only talked about myself too much!

Even if it's lacking, I will continue to make Lee Da-eul better than before!

Thank you with all my heart to all the people who support me who take care of my life. Make sure to get a good night's sleep, eat well, and eat a little late-night snack..! Condition management is really important..! Until the day we see you again next time, I hope you are healthy and full of good things! If it's short, it's short, if it's long, thank you for reading the long article! i love you!!

Bak Doha’s comment on his own fan cam is:

hello everyone ! I am Bak Do-ha, a class of 22, who is going to see our cherry blossoms 🌸 who is retaking the Introduction to Love Studies class this semester. I'm writing this at the point where it's been less than 5 hours since I finished the stage, not just in the spring of love and cherry blossoms, and the memory of meeting you guys is still vivid. The memory of today will never be forgotten in the future. Thank you guys 🤍

To be honest, I had a lot of worries while preparing for this mission. Uh,,, I always had a lot of worries, but this time I think it was a bit harsh. Starting from worrying about whether I can join this mission without being eliminated, what position and what song should I choose to show you a better image... Among them, I think I was most concerned about my own musical talent. I want to do well, so I'm putting in a lot of effort, but to be honest, I'm not good at dancing, singing, or rapping haha,,,🥲 So, even if I survived, I was really worried about whether I would be able to solve the given mission well. While I was spending time thinking about it, I was so thankful that I was able to prepare for the 2nd mission with an undeserved ranking, and I chose the song ‘Not Spring, Love, Cherry Blossoms’.

I thought I could best express this song with a warm atmosphere, and the dance seemed to show a little bit of growth in the first mission, Hot Sauce, so this time I wanted to show you singing and rapping. So while preparing for this stage, I practiced singing hard and wrote rap lyrics, so I pressed down the message I wanted to convey to you all. But writing rap lyrics was a lot harder than I thought... ,I felt the pain of creation for the first time😂 It took me 3 days to write 8 words in an attempt to convey a message with a sense of rhythm and rhyme.

We successfully showed our growth in dancing, singing, and rapping, so even if we get eliminated now, it's not okay,,,! I want to survive more and show you more diverse sides..!

Anyway, from the 3rd mission, only your choices determine whether or not to survive, and the song is also selected, so I'm thinking that in the 3rd mission, I have to show you what you want to see! (I want to sing a song with a sexy mood. Whisper whisper🤫) If you are curious about what I will show you on the 3rd mission stage, I think you can vote for Bak Do-ha on Mnet Plus.😉

Lastly, I am very, very grateful to those who came to see the performance today. Thanks to your support, I gained a lot of motivation☺ I am really grateful to those who couldn’t come today and to those who support me from afar!-! Then I hope to see you again next time and I will finish writing this article. I love you guys sincerely :)

I-chan’s comment is:

Hello Star Creators!!!! I am Jeong Yi-chan, a class of 23, who took the Introduction to Love Studies class this semester! first!!! Thank you so much for coming into my fancam video 🙇‍♂ How did you see the stage "other than love this spring?" It was a stage that was all the more meaningful because it was a stage where I was able to barely survive with 52nd place at the last ranking announcement ceremony! I failed to manage my condition in the first contest last time, so I only wanted to show a better image in the second contest, and I was also very worried. but !! Thanks to Doha and Daul who are proud together, and to the star creators who believe in us!!! I was able to overcome it with strength!! I was really happy for about 3 minutes while performing this stage and received a lot of good energy! thank you. I really prepared with the thought that this was the last stage, and I want to tell you that even if it was the last stage, I really enjoyed being with you all! Also, if you listen to our song!!!! I wish you happiness! therefore! Always, I hope you don’t get sick and only be happy and full of fun things. I hope that the coming spring will be filled with only love. ఇ

Anyway, back to the episode. The winner is, of course, I-chan, with 730 votes. It’s well deserved -- this was a vocal performance and he brought really beautiful vocals. 

Hey, wait, check it out - that’s the same window with the set of broken blinds on it that we see in the judges’ room. So apparently they use this room to film the judges reactions, and then later on rearrange it to cram all the trainees in and have them take turns facing their fates. MNET, you keep showing us this huge building -- what are all those rooms for? Are they just pajama storage, or what? Anyway.

I-chan gets the final word, interviewing that this performance was an opportunity to make up for the shame of the previous performance. I think it was a little more than that, I-chan. I don’t really love the song -- it’s pretty, but just a little boring for my taste -- but I’m going to seek out your music and give it a shot. 

As always, thanks for reading! Have a good day, maintain your condition, and I'll see you in the next one (Butterfly).

[britneyshakespeare]

Man keeps flirting w me out of the blue lately and I have no idea why

For context, while I'm oversharing, when I sometimes make personal posts about a character I vaguely call Man, I'm referring to a guy I met just before I turned 20 when we went to the same community college. He's eight years older than me and before he pursued higher education his first career as an adult was as a male model. He wrote poetry which was submitted to the college's literary magazine which I read and edited submissions for, and I loved his poems independently before realizing the guy named ****** who writes the poems is the same gorgeous ****** I met in passing.

So once I put 2 and 2 together, I had a big stupid schoolgirl crush on him, which I knew was a big stupid schoolgirl crush. I was kinda dumb at 20 but I wasn't that dumb. I didn't hold out any hope; my crush on him was basically a joke, a silly recurring gag in the background of my life. This guy was not a friend, but an acquaintance with a lucky set of factors to make me fascinated by him. The fascination was real but I also knew it was shallow.

And then just before the pandemic shut the whole world down, we connected on social media and he was really rather forward in interacting with me, not in any ways that could be called inappropriate or disrespectful, even looking back on it now. It seemed and still does seem he has some genuine admiration for me on his own end; I know he's very fascinated by art and literature, for example, and usually when he reaches out to me it's deferring to my opinion on something related to that. He also thinks I'm funny and just generally intelligent, it seems. He has taken stock in my opinions on social-political issues and things like that before, when I don't normally offer my takes on that stuff without being solicited for them. You know. He cares what I think, so it seems.

But we are not and have never been close friends. Though much more acquainted than we were in 2019, we are still just acquaintances, really. Neither of us are the type to open up on things or be vulnerable very often.

When I had a bigger crush on him than I do nowadays, I used to look for excuses to message him about this or that, or show him this poem or tell him that joke he'd like. I can't tell you the last time I reached out to him first. Probably close to 2 years ago now, and it was getting to be much less frequent before that. At some point I know Man got a girlfriend he never really told me much about and I was always awkward when he would bring up girls to me. Which he did not infrequently, for someone that he had a somewhat (subtly) flirtatious correspondence with already.

He's messaged me out of the blue at least twice in the last week, and talked to me a lot more frequently leading up to that. It's never for very long but it's back to that needy validation-seeking he sometimes does. It seems natural that he'd suspect at one point in time I had at least a little crush on him, even if I was always shy about it. I certainly never boldly pursued him or made any first moves. Any time I ever flirted with him, I was nervously following a lead.

Does he just want attention? Is he an attention hoe? Now? Why? You not seeing anyone at the moment, ******? Do you wanna see if this old toy still has working batteries?

Either that or it's possible I do and have stuck around in his mind in some significant way all these years, which I do find harder to believe, and not just in a low-self-worth way. He might be impressed w me in some ways but he doesn't know me that well. His crush on me would only be about half as shallow as my crush on him when I was 20. I don't think he knows how little he knows about me; to some extent, too, that's my fault for always being so reserved. Maybe he knows he doesn't know me well but still wants to! Silly boy. Useless. Stupid.

I don't even really care much for him anymore but as a specimen he really is quite peculiar.

[alikestory]

i keep seeing various iterations of that webcomic post going around and i HATE IT it's so depressing ;___;;;

this post got so long and rambly i'm putting it under a cut. talking points include: smackjeeves, my old comic Wander, and various tangents

there were so many good webcomics i read on smackjeeves and deviantart back when i was in high school, they had a whole different energy... like the creators were having fun with it and not worrying about how to Make It. (there wasn't like, an industry around it then so :v )

i wish i could have experienced making a webcomic back then and participating in that scene... but it just makes me sad to think about....

(if i did post anything polished-looking enough to get readers i don't think i would have really enjoyed it... the big story I was drawing then was Wander and if I'd been able to pull off what I was going for it would have been great but that was NOT HAPPENING (I did draw like, three chapters I never posted anywhere and outlined some more and that thing was a MESS u__u) tho I did post a comic to smackjeeves at one point it was really sketchy and I originally drew it for my friends so it was all just inside jokes....... I think a couple people did subscribe to it for some reason??? very nice of them. anyway like. even Blackout City that I started like seeeven?? years later there are lots of things I wish I thought through more or are kinda dumb but I still like reading it =w= )

BUT IF I'D POSTED WANDER ;__; BACK THEN. there would have been SOMEONE who read it and was like "this is awesome" and it wouldn't matter (to them) that it didn't turn out how I wanted......

you know that kind of thing where a creator is embarrassed by their old work because their new stuff has become polished and professional but that silly, crazy stuff they did when they were figuring it out has so much HEART..... it would have been cool to be that for someone.......

ALSO IF I'D DRAWN MORE OF WANDER I COULD READ IT. u__u well it would suck but IF I'D DONE A GOOD JOB. imagine a world. :v it's not something I'm interested in writing now (tangent: I started capitalizing the "I"s and nothing else like I'm typing on a cell phone that's autocorrecting them even though I AM NOT and I don't know why but now I need to keep doing it for Consistency) but I would like to read it if someone else wrote it ; 3;

it was about the people working at this hotel at a crossroads between worlds. for most of the story it was about them dealing with various visitors who would be the main focus of the chapters and then slowly you learn about the main characters. (ideally. I was not then and continue to not be any good at coming up with short stories.) and then at the end there's a serial killer who one of the main characters had a childhood romance with until he killed her sister..... you know, some standard melodrama. :'^)

also it was supposed to be seven volumes long..... because I had no concept of how long that would take...... and because tokyo babylon is seven volumes long AND THE COVERS WERE ALSO GOING TO BE COLOUR-CODED THE SAME WAY, OKAY???? IF THERE'S ONE THING YOU NEED TO KNOW IT'S THAT I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED TOKYO BABYLON AND I ALWAYS WILL. CLAMP NEEDS TO RELEASE AN ART BOOK WITH ALL THE PREMIUM EDITION COVERS BECAUSE I WILL NOT BUY SEVEN VOLUMES OF MANGA I ALREADY OWN BUT I REEEALLY WANT TO. I DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH SPACE ON MY BOOKSHELF. ALSO AN ART BOOK OF ALL THE CLEAR CARD ART BC IT'S REALLY PRETTY.

those are my demands. anyway, what was i talking about?

[sviancontrast]

You focused on the wrong one

Ok so I've been thinking about this for a while and decided to make a continuation of "Everyone has to see". This one isn't inspired on any prompt, tho. However, if I were to give it a prompt, it'd be the following.

Read Everyone has to see

It wasn't until Comic Relief left Hero's team that Villain started noticing that there was a weird vibe around Hero, and it wasn't until Comic Relief started hanging out with them that they realized they were never meant to be this story's antagonist.

Now, to make it easier for everyone, I'mma just- Type out the names of the chars.

The Wishers — Hero's team

Colton — Hero

Mary — Love interest

Denzel — Comic relief

Ferdinand — Villain

Becky — Villain's eyes

Becky's Father – Dog whisperer

Hunter – Scent collector

A few weeks had passed since Denzel left The Wishers, during which he had been staying over at Ferdinand's base. Both of them had been getting closer despite Denzel not revealing much information about his former friends. However, Ferdinand soon started getting creeped out by his new friend's habits. They weren't terrifying, but they were definitely quite unsettling.

Only a few days after Denzel moved in, Ferdinand heard some weird noises. They sounded familiar, like a language he'd listened to once but had never understood.

"Denzel?" he asked, confused.

Denzel quickly turned around to look at his friend, smiling, "yeah?"

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"That voice, didn't you hear it?" he felt dumb, maybe he was just hearing things.

"Oh, that was probably me. I tend to talk to myself," he shrugged off dismissively, "just a habit I picked up whenever I kept guard."

"Were you that lonely?" he questioned as he sat down.

"Oh, no, not at all! I was just coming up with a few jokes and trying to keep you away by pretending there were more people up," he laughed off.

Ferdinand wanted to comment on how weird that'd sound as a fake conversation, but nodded.

A different time, during cleaning day, Ferdinand was walking around to see if anyone needed help, but ended up stopping in his tracks upon seeing a bunch of random objects on the bed. He looked around before getting closer, picking one up and inspecting it.

It was some sort of stone with a inscription on it, but it looked distorted, like it was in a different language.

He put it down and took another glance at the objects that, despite him telling himself it would be a quick glance before going back to cleaning, he knew very damn well it probably wouldn't be.

He picked up a small box which, upon opening, played a soft tune. Inside there was a stack of photographs and a small journal. He would have closed the box immediately if it weren't for the fact the phitographs were clearly edited. I mean, how was it possible that all the faces in the photographs were blanked out, scratched or deformed except Denzel's?

He was about to look though the journal when he heard a voice calling him from the hallway.

"Ferdinand, sir! Can you come real quick?" the voice yelled, and he accidentally dropped the box and journal.

Luckily for him, they both fell on the bed, so it didn't really cause a mess. He put the photographs back in the box, but something stopped him from picking up the journal.

It had opened with the fall, showing a sketch of someone who looked quite similar to he himself in that same room, looking at a book on the floor.

He just picked it up, closed it and placed it back in its box before rushing to wherever the voice came from, but in his brain he couldn't stop seeing that sketch.

"Is there anything wrong, sir?" asked a mildly concerned Rosalind.

She was the greatest blacksmith in the base, if not in the whole country.

"Oh, no, Rosalind. It's nothing, really. Just thinking," he responded, dismissively.

"Recreating everything in your mind again? You need to let that brain of yours rest a bit, Ferdinand sir, you have the best strategists on your side."

"I know, that's why I'm not worrying about that, either. I am just absent minded today."

"Alright, if you say so... But please remember we are all here to listen to you and help you out, alright?"

Ferdinand smiled slightly and nodded. That was right, everyone there supported him, even if at the start they were considered his victims. But that also gave him food for though. Denzel wasn't on his side, he wasn't siding with anyone but staying neutral. Moreover, he was a friend of his, so he shouldn't have to worry about him. In fact, he was against The Wishers after everything that happened during his stay in the team.

And then it clicked.

"Betty!" he called out as he went looking for her.

"Over here!" she yelled back from the 'hunting' quarters.

Ferdinand went over to her, then ordered, "I need you to locate The Wishers ASAP and take me to them"

"Huh? What? Why? It's not The Date," she questioned, mildly concerned.

"There might be an outside factor we never considered"

Betty nodded, rushing out to get her stuff before leaving with her boss. It wasn't the first time he had tagged along, but he hadn't ever since the plan was finished. It was perfectly scheduled, every possible scenario they could come up with had been considered and countermeasures had been prepared in any of those cases.

Keywords are 'they could come up with'.

Not many hours had passed before they got to The Wishers' camp. They were still packing their stuff, so they couldn't notice the villain's presence until it was too late.

"Colton Hastur," Ferdinand called, making everyone freeze in place.

He was close enough to kill them all, how could they have let their guard down like this?

"What is it that you want, you vile man?" Colton asked with an amount of confidence he really did not possess.

"First of all, I have a name. Secondly, I want you to listen here and listen carefully," he said, raising his fingers as he spoke.

"Why should we listen to you, Ferdinand del Bay-e?"

"Ferdinand del Valle, not del Bay-e, you uneducated rat," the villain corrected.

"Whatever, same difference. What is the important thing you need to tell us, as if we were allies!?" Colton asked, tired of waiting.

And maybe he had a point. Maybe Ferdinand should have spoken faster. Maybe that way they would have had enough time to notice and dodge the attack that swept them both off their feet and knocked them out.

[plantdad-dante]

Book #112 - King Of Scars by Leigh Bardugo

(yeeeeeeeeeah we're back to misery. whoops. the void sucked me back in.)

I have a strange urge to take cheap pot shots at this book, so here goes:

RIP Nikolai, you would have loved Arsonist's Lullaby by Hozier.

Nikolai going "my friends wouldn't be that dumb" when ten pages earlier they decided to be exactly that dumb is peak comedy, yes, but why did we have to make it a whole plot line.

In all honesty, "my new gf's dad is evil" is more of a Spiderman plot, isn't it, Nina.

And I see we are back to full grimdark with Zoya's backstory. Couldn't have chosen a slightly less thoroughly fucked up childhood for her to escape from, could we, huh?

I hate how chopped up the book reads, with up to three completely different plotlines, in three completely different places, featuring three completely different casts of characters. It makes it hard to stay invested in any of them, when I am constantly expected to mentally shift gears with every single chapter.

And it leads to strange jumps in the plot as well. Nikolai and Zoya's stay in the weird pocket dimension thing especially felt weirdly choppy, like whole chunks of it were edited out and discarded, but the later investment they were building to wasn't. So suddenly the book acts like Zoya and Juris had this deep mentor/student bond and his death is a sufficient trigger to jumpstart Zoya's character development. And it all just... falls flat.

But then the book draaaaaags in other places (Isaak) and I catch myself skipping paragraphs. Not just because it drags, but also because Isaak's plot pushed every last one of my imposter syndrome buttons and I hated it. Like, no sarcasm, no joke - actually hated it.

On the other hand, Nina's storyline was... fine? Idk, after Crooked Kingdom I wanted her to get a happy ending in another installment, but now that I am reading said installment, I am suddenly filled with fear that that is exactly what she will not get. I like Hanne, though.

Finally, I think Nikolai has managed to endear himself to me yet again, though I do like him significantly less now that he is king. I enjoy him most when he's just being a smart, infuriating little scoundrel, not so much a royal or a statesman. At the end of this, he actually has a miniature 1900s-mystery-novel parlor scene, for like, two pages, and he gets to be fucking insanely smart. And I want more of that Nikolai.

Actually, now that I think about it... Fuck off with the monarchy shit, give me Robin Hood Nikolai. Give me a Nikolai who fights for people from the ground up, and who occasionally busts out his best Holmes impressions. Someone write me a Robin Hood AU, please.