#desperately wanted to make somethign right now

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

Movie: Sonic the Hedgehog 3

Song: Jericho - Iniko

My Sonic movie marathon isn't until Saturday. made a Shadow AMV to cope

[xxtommycoolattasboobs420xx]

ok basically im completely butchering my friend's original idea for this AU. but its ok he loves me and i can do whatever i want. sorry mar.

OMORI HLVRAI AU!!!!! In which after HLVRAI, Gordon inserts his & the science teams (+others) data into Omori, unaware of The Horrors.

full explanation under cut since its going to be a long ass post :3

ok so. basically. literally. yeah.

The hlvrai character data replaces the existing omori characters, basically just inserting them into the roles the game needs. (Ex: Gordon = Sunny, Sunny has been replaced by Gordon and Gordon now fills that role as the protagonist)

THE CHARACETRS!!! yes

Gordon = Sunny: Gordon's the protagonist, obviously, so it makes sense. Plus the whole sunny/omori conflict reflects how omori!Gordon is just a copy of the Real Gordon. Omori-Gordon is the representation of who Gordon is supposed to be, but can't.

Tommy = Kel: Self explanatory I think. It just fits. I don't have alot to say on this one BUT!!!!

Darnold = Hero: LISTEN!!!!!!!! Soda guys are just paired 2gether methink. ALSO ALSO!! Because the science team replaced the original omori character data, the fact that Kel and Hero are brothers is instead replaced with "Tommy and Darnold are best friends (and they were roommates)" They technically still have a connection but the are NOT now brothers in the game.

Bubby = Aubrey: Ik Aubrey is just really mean following the greif of Mari and being mad at Basil, and Bubby isn't just mean for no reason, but I think the way he's sorta detached from the rest of the group for a bit and off doing his own thing in this new world they were thrown into sorta fits. idk he just deserves to fuck around with the hooligan guys. also get a baseball bat.

Coomer = Basil: LISTEN. Coomer being Super Aware right along with Gordon really fits, bc Coomer was the one who suggested putting the data in a new game in the first place!!!! Also also Coomer is Very Aware at SEVERAL points in the series and it fucks me up every single time. Coomer and Gordon DESERVE to be unreality trauma buddies. Gordon and Coomer BOTH being desperate to keep the game happy and wholesome like they thought it was supposed to be, both in their own ways, leading to Coomer vs Gordon unintentionally hurting themselves or other people, including each other. They mean alot 2 me.

Benrey = Mari.: Benrey still appearing to Gordon as nightmare bathroom monster ghost shit just makes SENSE TO ME. BENREY JUMPSCARE. Gordon feeling GUILTY about leaving Benrey to die so Benrey manifests in Gordon's headspace and haunts him in faraway. (Once again, sibling dynamic is NONEXISTANT!!! Headspace frenrey is real.)

Also Forzen is just one of the hooligan kids. Probably the maverick.

Also Stranger is gman. Cus uh. He didn't sync with the game properly and is stuck in Gordon's headspace and fucking with him & telling him how Very Bad this game is for the science team & gordon. or somethign. this whole au isnt entirely thought out leave me alone or ill shoot you with my lazer eyes (/j)

AS 4 HOW HEADSPACE WORKD!!!!!! pretty much the same lolz. It's all Gordon's interpretation of how the game is supposed to be and how the characters are supposed to act now, and Real Gordon is how he's supposed to be. Benrey manifests in headspace, Gordon repressing his trauma from Black Mesa by trying to repress Coomer fucking with his head and telling him nothing's real (and Gman too), and he just tries his best to make everything work.

Gordon can almost completely control headspace, which comes with being the protag in this game, and he likes that because outside of headspace, he can't control anything. Once the science team and him were put into the game he couldn't change anything else because he's not the Real Gordon. Everything just works out well in headspace, so he aims to kind of keep the game like that. Coomer obviously is against this bc headspace Coomer isn't him, and the headspace versions of the whole science team are just other copies, and he wants to let himself and the rest of them experience the real game outside of Gordon's control.

SO YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im cring. can u tell this AU is only halfway thought out or am i insane.

[tvranny]

.

[jess-the-vampire]

Sky And The Forces Of The Multiverse, Chapter 28

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-

Landon was waiting for judas when he left through the door, almost scaring him as he approached, he didn't entirely seem pleased about his father and judas interrupting his plea to have his crush over, nor did he all that much about not even being able to talk to judas as a result of that situation but fine, at least it was over with. Judas did give him an apologetic look for the situation though, trying to comfort his brother with a hand on his shoulder, trying to be more conscious about hurting landon due to stuff like this, Landon didn't bring the matter up though, grumbling and turning his head. "Dad tell you anything interesting?". "Well, i think we might have some new chores over the next few weeks if you consider that interesting...", he was partly joking but he did basically sign the family up to clean his father's wizard room for a good while, and it sure would take a good while, even with magic. "But no, dad....he wanted to talk to me more about...my arm and that kinda stuff. But I'll get into more of it later if you want to know, I personally wanted to ask about what you wanted to talk to me about and then maybe...we could hang out?". "You and me...hang out?".

"Landon we're brothers, i don't think it's too uncommon for brothers to hang out...". "Well uh.....", he crossed his arms and turned his head, "It's more like you don't really hang out with me and mason like you hang out with sky....Like i get you see us all the time, but we don't "Hang Out" like you "Hang Out" with skyler." He wasn't entirely wrong, usually when he did hang out with his brothers it stemmed from a family thing then them actually choosing to spend a ton of quality time together as brothers, but judas still persisted on this. "Well, this time i'm asking for both of us to hang out together, and you can tell me about...whatever it is you need to tell me...", landon didn't really protest as judas led them to keep going, passing through the dark hallways of the underworld castle and trying to talk to each other. You'd think them being brothers would make it easier to speak to each other but it didn't in a lot of ways, somehow it felt easier for judas to tell sky everything going on with him then landon and he wasn't sure  if it was a matter of their dynamic or personalities. Could've been both as landon tried to speak through the awkward silence. "Judas...so...look, me and celeste found something and we kinda think there's someone we need to question but i'm not sure how you're gonna respond to it so it's a little weird...", how was he supposed to tell judas his best friend could've been responsible? Or that she had powers she may not of told him about? Judas would never believe that about her and he knew that, even he really wasn't sure about sky doing anything since literally everyone knew she wasn't an amazing magic user of manipulator to find some way to be behind this. But still, if she knew she had this kinda power, she needed to tell everyone, right? "It has something to do with sky right?". Oh "how'd you-?". "If it's gonna be something you were worried about telling me, it had to be about someone close...and if it had been about our parents or mason, you'd have no reason to not have said it in sky's presence.". Guess when you put it that way,it was more obvious what was going on then it seemed, "Landon, we know sky's under suspicion by the high commission for being responsible for a lot of the things going on, we're trying to keep her out of most of these dangerous missions for a reason, if she gets caught at the scene of the crime she's in danger...". "But you still took her to save nora...". "That was a more desperate situation, we needed more help and sunny and galexia had to stay back to keep our parents busy, not to mention you and celeste were gone...", he kept him close as he watched out for listeners, "I'm just worried whatever you found is either faulty evidence used against sky to frame her or-". Landon quickly shoved the paper into his hands, silencing him, "Sky's wand, how much do you kinda know about that thing personally?". "W-what?" "Dude, luna wanted to look at sky's wand when she tried to team up against you, we found that page and we think we know why she wanted a closer look, apparently that wand as a very odd opal attached to it...can see other realities?". Judas's reaction as as expected, as in, looking entirely confused and outright non-believing. "Uh....wait...are you indeed claiming that sky....has a gem, that allows her to peak into other dimensions, hence saying she's responsible for everyone being here like she said she wasn't?". "Do i need to repeat it?". "Dude that's....a pretty wild claim...", he sounded a little caught off guard, his voice oddly cracking during his response, "I mean....sky being able to peak into other dimensions with her wand? She had a hard time doing a cloudy ride spell not even all that long ago, she kept summoning her mom's...sky's just not that supremely powerful to send them all here even if she wanted to, she still needs more magic practice for somethign crazy like that....besides i'm her best friend, i'd know this if it were true...". "Celeste translated this for me, look at it, it's sky's page! I'm not making this up judas, sky's wand is weird and she's not telling you for some reason...i don't want her to be in trouble as much as you...but it's like.....weird isn't it?". Well, he couldn't deny that, that was for sure, sky was pretty open to him about a lot of this stuff, she wasn't the type to not tell him something like this. Him looking over the paper and trying to rack his brain about it. "Maybe we should ask sky if she actually wrote this..". "What?". "C'mon landon, it's not rocket science, I should talk to sky about her page, the page you found.....we should get confirmation from her if she wrote in this book all this stuff about her gemstone. You finding this random page in the woods that looks like a page from her book needs a little more proof behind it before we start getting the pitchforks ready on her?", the younger brother rolled his eyes, "We didn't find it in the woods, fae did and we saw her drop it....somewhere and besides...celeste thought it was kinda legit..". "That's not enough...". landon shot a look to judas that could kill, "What do you mean it's not enough? Like i might not have a book of spells but it looks like a page from it! and a fellow princess confirmed it!". "I mean, anyone with knowledge of the low mewman language could've written this in her book, torn out the page, and left it out there to trick someone....we should talk to sky ourselves before we start really pointing any fingers." The pink boy didn't argue with him on that, not like he really could anyway, there really wasn't any evidence that sky had been the one who had written this for sure in this page. They did just find it without so much as thinking someone who wasn't sky could've written in it. "Look i don't want her to be behind anything...I'm just....I don't like the implication....she's your friend and like....if this is true it's super freaky and ugh...there just has to be a reason luna wanted to see sky's and and if this is not it then i don't know what is!", if judas asked if landon thought sky was bad enough to keep this from him, he'd say no, the situation just unfortunately left him wondering if maybe sky was more secretive to judas then he thought, they were close....almost perfectly close...sky didn't typically keep secrets from judas if any. And this was a big thing to not be telling everyone, especially if it was the keep to solving their problem in the first place. "I'll talk to her about it later landon, we'll see what's really going on...", Judas tried to reassure his younger brother, though landon couldn't help but wonder if judas was left a little suspicious or conflicted or was seriously loyal to his friend on the matter, though whichever way he was feeling....landon was not feeling better about this at all. "Yeah but what if-". "We'll see later..". Judas sounded particularly dismissive about the idea of sky being up to anything, well, it's not like it wasn't expected since landon was basically accusing his best friend of being at fault, whether knowingly or not. Though it did leave landon a little annoyed. " Let's go get some ice cream...I think right now i need a break...", he walked a little faster and landon had to hurry to catch up with his older brother, taking note of jude's less then smiley personality right now. Landon tended to be the grumpy brother of the group, well, usually the grumpiest person in general of their family. It was considered sorta a normal thing, being angry, but theses days the grumpiest were landon and tom occasionally, their dad. Well, even their grandparents could get mad but they were usually very loving people who were very protective and wanted to help in their own way, the family wasn't entirely used to anger coming from Judas more then anyone. Yeah he had an arm that was considered the equivalent of a ticking time bomb attached to him and that made everyone afraid of him, but judas had a prime focus on never wanting to hurt anyone. He didn't like the idea of making someone cry, or get hurt, in fact he had a fear of it since he was little since everyone made him afraid of himself. Landon kinda wanted to be mad at him for not being more suspicious of sky but then again he'd be pissed if judas accused bernard of this so he might do better to back off before he made things worse until they had better proof. Judas usually tried to be a positive person, so when he was upset, he was upset. The boy put his hands in his pockets and was quiet as the two continued, landon grumbling to himself before trying to ease up the tension and spouting something under his breath before he could even consider what he was saying fullly. "I think I'm starting to like bernard...more...", judas's ears pricked up as he looked over to his younger brother, "Wait...what was that?". Landon blushed and grumbled, well he had to do it now, and spouted it out a little louder this time. "I think I have a crush on bernard....". The older demon's eyes lit up in realization, "Oh....OH, wow wait really? You serious?". Landon felt like hiding all of a sudden and almost tried to make a run for it when judas took ahold of his arm, a smug smirk on his face now, "Good for you, I knew it...". Landon felt redder then red,"Look, just....we don't get to see each other in person as much and I want him to come over and look....maybe you could....convince our parents into doing it sooner then later?". This was more humiliating then it had played out in his head, there was a reason he kept his tail hidden, it exposed how he felt too much in every situation. He knew full well if it were exposed now it'd be trapped between his legs and only making him look more pathetic right now as he tried to explain his plight. "I just want to be able to hang out with him down here....or...let you guys get to know him more, well...without mason trying to set us up hopefully..". Judas patted his back, "That sounds great....uh....sorry about mason, I kinda was the one who egged him on to that.....sorry. BUT in my defense i was trying to keep him from finding out any....stuff he still shouldn't know about, though i am sorry.". Landon shrugged him off and sighed, "Whatever, just don't do it when he's here...if my parents and grandparents start setting up dates for us i'm gonna be utterly humiliated and I can't handle that right now...". "Eh...i know the feeling actually...". "Anyways....look....it's really important to me and you're better with our parents so...". Judas suddenly felt a little worse, geez landon really did see him this way didn't he? He reached out to comfort his brother but landon shrugged off the action, "I just want your help, it would mean a lot to me if you could help me...get more time with him.". Judas got it, reassuring him, "I'll give it a shot, y'know, we were mostly teasing you about having a crush on him, uh...sorry if that was weird considering you sorta ended up kinda liking him...". "No it's....it's fine....i mean we all relentlessly made fun of you for crushing on sky...". "Yeah, when i was 6! And had a crush on anyone my age willing to talk to me..."., judas still seemed slightly embarrassed by that judging by his blushy face and hand rubbing his shoulders in anxiety, "When you're a small child who doesn't have a lot of friends and not a lot of people understand you...it was easy at the time for me to feel that way before I got older and did some growing up. I was really young and naive, you're not and if you really feel that way then I'm sorry if it was a little too much....I know i can kinda hurt people when I tease sometimes..". "Still.....but whatever...". "Yeah but....we shouldn't have been teasing you so much about it, so...yeah I'm sorry about that. But hey....I think it's great you've found someone you really like, You thinking about asking him out properly?". Landon just shrugged as he tried to reduce the redness as much as possible, "I dunno, i don't want to make things awkward, not to mention he's my only real friend so if i lose him....well it'll kinda feel like i caused myself to lose the only real friend i had...I mean, yeah i hang out with sky and such kinda...but it's not the same, they're your friends judas...not mine...". "You should probably be honest with him at some point though, i mean, what if he does feel the same way about you and you're both trying to avoid saying it to not ruin your friendship? Imagine him saying something similar to melaine right now....", it was wishful thinking of course, it's not like judas knew the human as well as landon did and honestly melaine's response was more likely to be worried that bernard had been possessed by a demon curse then be playing matchmaker....but it was a nice thought. "Right now i just want to see him in person, and as far as i know, earth magic doesn't allow him to teleport here like we can do....". "Well...I'll give it my best shot.....we gotta get my lil bro a date!", landon groaned as judas tagged him along, "C'mon, it's ice cream time!". The two boys heading off further along the castle, a mewman girl with a giant card chasing after them from behind. "Galexia?", they turned around and stopped in their tracks as she approached them with a skid, her long brown hair probably dirty from all the things she most likely ran into on her way over to find the boys in the first place. Even with a giant card practically making it hard to see her face it was fairly easy to tell the tall girl running down the corridors was the green-eyed princess, honesty judas was more surprised she didn't pop up next to him out of nowhere. She shoved the card into their hands before they could even say much else and markers as well, "Sign! Get well card!". Landon glared at Judas and he just gave him an awkward smile. "I'll try in get you a chance in the next few days, promise...", Landon sighed and nodded, "Fine....just...tell me what Sky says when you eventually ask her...ok?". Judas went silent but left a nod as he attended to galexia's current request, Landon was just going to have to trust him on this situation, he didn't really have much of a choice considering judas was sky's closest friend, though he just hoped his brother's emotional status wouldn't get worse over this. They got ice cream shortly later and even though judas was in better spirits as he enjoyed his mint chocolate chip sundae, landon chose not to speak anymore of sky as he took small bites of his cookies and cream, the two talking more about other matters till they parted ways. Sky was always a sensitive subject for the guy since he was so protective over his best friend and landon just hoped for everyone's sake judas's protectiveness didn't lead to anymore issues down the line. Last thing they needed was to be at each other's throats more then anything. - Some time passed for the next few days, and sky's attention had diverted from luna to focusing a little more on angel then she would've liked. She was still very suspicious of luna, and deeply uncomfortable with her knowing what she did and her powers, but with all the fingers pointing to angel right now she was definitely missing something on his end. Whether guilt or innocent, there was still something fishy about her and his people these days and getting it out of him wasn't going to be easy. The direct approach, was probably a bad idea considering there was a high chance of ruining whatever good graces their relationship had had recently. So the most likely way was to just act like nothing was wrong and keep an eye on him as they hung out, though at least she didn't have to do it alone. Her best candidates to help, were judas, sunny and nora and that seemed fine enough. Though nora was still processing the whole "Multiple dimensions" thing, her research into angel's species was a good way to get some insight onto him and the situation. Sunny of course said she did this all the time back home, befriending monsters and keeping company. Judas told sky sunny was a sweetheart, but she was clever and a little scary sometimes, especially since she was more powerful then she looked. As long as Sunny stayed friendly and didn't end up stabbing the prince with her tail knife, hopefully things would be easier from then onwards. Sunny seemed more then happy though to help out, though angel seemed less fond of her bubbly personality in comparison to the others. Probably with no intention to be rude, but he seemed to get along better with people who weren't as "out there". Judas seemed to be the person he was the most comfortable with next to sky, and that was fair, he knew judas for longer and he and judas had always had a more respectful relationship between them. Sunny and Nora were cool but judas seemed to make angel feel more relaxed since he knew him better and well, Judas seemed to usually get along with anyone who didn't antagonize him right off the bat. Judas told sky that angel was mostly about as strange as he usually was though, and if he did have anything to hide, he had become very good at lying recently. Judas himself had been wanting to speak to Sky on something recently but Sky had the feeling her clear stress made him shift his entire focus on Angel for her sake. If Judas was shifting his focus so heavily to help Sky deal with something that was bothering her tremendously, she must've been pretty bothered by it. He already spent a few nights reassuring her and trying his best to relax her with hot chocolate or offers for game nights just to offer her a break for a few minutes. Maybe Sky was being too paranoid about angel, but it was hard for her to help it either. She'd spent a long time dealing with this boy and they seemed to finally be getting along for better and now she was forced to re-question everything once again that she had known about him. Then again, angel has never been clever enough to hide this much from her in the past, she was getting a headache from this, it was getting to be too much to deal with. Which had probably been why she called melaine tonight to get a break, and to vent to someone else and get another opinion. "I dunno mel, what if he does turn out bad....am I being too paranoid?". On the other end of the line she could hear the earth girl scrambling around her very messy room, though considering she should be asleep at this hour, sky wondered if her mom was lying awake right now. "Oh no no, in  a lot of stories i read the heroes get paranoid when their turned good team member's past comes back to haunt them...like they'll become evil again! But then sometimes, it's usually not the case at all!". Sky was looking up at the ceiling and her face twisted, "Well angel wasn't really evil..so...". "Spiders aren't usually the good guys though? They're a primal fear for most humans, the many eyes, the pincers...all the hair...". "This is the same thing you said about judas when you first met him, you were all like 'Demons are bad guys cause they steal your souls and make deals and all that'!' Y'know all your earth books and shows and movies don't always depict the truth. I mean, I know earth isn't entirely used to monsters...but c'mon mel, you're judging them too hard. Maybe like, you need to watch more stuff with monsters as the good guys, like angel's species doesn't drink blood, judas doesn't regularly eat humans, you gotta let it go mel...". "But didn't you-?". "Didn't I what-?" "You liked to talk about spider boy being a pain all the time.". She wasn't wrong, even as much as Sky wished she was, since Judas usually had never really approved of Sky fussing about the prince, she had usually done it with melaine, telling her about how how frustrating the boy had been. The stupid plans he did, the destruction he caused from whatever fight. Sky almost spent every night after ranting to melaine about Angel, It was something she'd grown a little too used to especially since her mom wouldn't listen much to it, her other mom found it more amusing then anything, and judas would lecture her on the matter. No wonder Angel and her had issues. Sky felt her throat welt up, trying to soften the matter, "Well yeah, in the past, and maybe it was stupid, but right now i just kinda wanna move past it....at this point it's gonna do us more harm kinda biting at each other...". "But still you kinda-". "Mel c'mon....i want all my friends to get along here and you're making it difficult with all your talk about what monsters and demons and all kinda of stuff do, like c'mon....i don't live in a spaceship and i don't probe people. You gotta let it go for them like you do me...like i love hearing your cool theories and stuff but this stuff is kinda like....rude.. and maybe i was being rude too with angel and everything...I was just...mad about being forced to...deal with him because of my mom....". Melaine was still running around on her end judging by the sounds of papers being throw around and sky bit her lip. "Melanie?" "Yeah?". "Mel, you're really cool, it's just....like....you don't know mewni very well, it's just a lot different then what you're used to thinking it is. And like i really need to be able to talk about this without all the bias against them, It would just mean a lot to me ok?" Mel hummed on the other end, and sky sighed again, maybe she needed to speak mel's language to get through to her. "You're like one of the people in stories who y'know...gets lost in them too much that they don't notice the truth or consider what they're used to might be wrong...", sky wasn't familiar with tropes like she was but that had to be one right? "Oh..."., she felt relieved knowing she finally got to her, though at the same time she almost felt responsible for her past issues with angel and anything else she might've said before to melaine on a rather bad day. She was supposed to be queen and she was talking heck about all these people to her friends. A little bit of time passed and Sky sighed to herself, she had really been kinda a pain before hadn't she? She rubbed her face and pinched her nose as she spoke. "I mean, it's partially my fault, i guess i don't really y'know, help you learn much about mewni? Maybe I really should get you involved more with mewni stuff...", she could practically see melaine's eyes lighting up on the other side of the screen, even if she couldn't actually see her. "REALLY?!", and sky smirked, and rolled over on her side, "Well, yeah yeah....I think it owe it to you to explain mewni a little better...so you and judas can get along...all that stuff...". Melaine squealed on the her end and sky worried it'd wake someone up at this late in the hour. "Yeah, it'll be cool, just...be careful what you say...ok?". "Ok!". Sky wasn't sure how much to believe her, but she could worry about it later. "Anyways...I just....ugh i'm worried....I feel like i'm being paranoid...and i don't want to be wrong or right and...ugh.". She shoved the pillow over her face, "I can't believe i'm getting worked up and frustrated over ANGEL of all people...but right now i need allies and people i can really trust and with loki under a spell for who knows how long that makes things way scarier. Me and Judas had a suspicion that maybe angel was under her control and....". Her eyes widened. "Under her control.....and now she seems to have some possible connection to their kingdom...possible vendetta against the butterfly kingdom and me, lucitor kingdom, and spiderbite kingdom...magic user...." She bit her lip as she grabbed her compact, "Mel, i'll get back to you, start working on some theories, lemme know if you come up with any good ones and uh...say hi to your mom for me, we'll find a time to meet up soon ok!". Melaine squealed on the other end as sky immediately went to texting judas. He might not see it till morning, but she had to send him a message, quickly. It was an assumption, and who knows if she was right for sure, but it was there and it couldn't go away. Chills running down the girl's spine as she typed in the dark room. Sky: Hey Jude... Sky: How do you feel about Angel's mother being our masked foe? - "Landon sweetie, you need to relax....", marco watched landon run around in circles in his room, worrying, "How can i relax? Bernard is coming over tonight! I didn't really expert him to be allowed over so soon and now i'm not sure what to wear or what to say or...ugh...". Marco smiled, sitting on the bed and sighing, "For the record, me and judas both convinced your father to do this today, it wasn't easy, but he softened pretty quick...he had a hard time with friends in the past, so i think he was more forgiving despite everything...". "I know but-.". "Landon, he's going to love you, it'll be fine....you guys had a great time at the sleepover right? Don't treat it much differently then that! He's gonna meet up with the rest of us for dinner and you'll both hang out, it'll be just fine....". Landon didn't feel so sure though, staring as his violin as if were something rotten, "I wanted him over and now i'm worried he's not gonna like it, what was it like with dad? Was it weird? Cause you guys seem...really happy these days...". "Well, your dad and i didn't really get off to a good start, our first technical date was even a set up for his anger issues, but things did improve and we ended up getting along just fine. Trust me, you can't get as bad as we did at the beginning, you'll be just fine...". Landon stopped his pacing and took a deep breath, "I know you guys keep reassuring me but it's still scary...just promise me dinner doesn't get weird....? And by that i mean...don't start asking if we're dating and stuff like that...". "Oh trust us, we'll try....though might wanna keep a careful eye on your grandparents just to be safe.". Ugh, of course. "They did that when you were together?". "Something like that...let's just say granny gushed a little too much how much i meant to tom and how much we cared about each other, i swear she was planning our wedding long before we even dated!". Oh geez, that sounded like a mess, if he could avoid that, then he'd sure try to. Bernard and him were just friends right now, and nothing could be worse then his family trying to make that humiliating for them both, marco reassured him as he tried to clean his already pretty neat room. Boy he was getting too worked up over this. He felt the queen put a hand on his should and move him away, "C'mon...maybe we instead should focus our priorities elsewhere...? let's go make sure dinner is ready, bernard doesn't have any allergies right?", landon was dragged away , out of his room and down the hall as he thought over their conversations. "No but he does say his folks are like...health conscious? He says they really focus on calories and food products and all that and it's hard for him to even just eat a bag of chips sometimes...". "Protective parents huh?". "He talks about them a lot....so I guess it feels that way...". "You think we're too protective over you boys?" "Well...I mean, i dunno....aren't all parents kind protective most of the time?", which resulted in a shrug from the human, "I mean, every parent is different, just like every child is different, some parents don't want to risk putting their child in danger, some want them to make choices for themselves. Bernard's folks may just raise him a lot differently then we tend to do. Now the true matter is if we should feed him like they tend to do so out of respect or-". "No no no, trust me, bernard is looking forward to eating something else today....TRUST ME.", marco smirked, "Alright alright, just be wary as a parent if anything happens, his parents are gonna blame me.". Landon was wary, he was just hoping it would never come to that point as they reached the kitchens. They were making a classic, spaghetti and meatballs, luckily without any trace of obscure demon food this time, though landon was still on the fence if bernard would eat normal demon food or not. Marco seemed pretty happy, looking over the garlic bread being served along with regular salad, the demons in the kitchen didn't seem too pleased making food that wasn't native to their culture but they could live with it for a day. Seeing the food seemed to ease landon's worries as marco asked to have the food tested just to be safe and they continued on their walk, landon checking his compact often. "I have to pick him up myself, so I...just want to wait till he tells me he's ready..". "It's going to be ok landon...breathe...". He took a deep breath, is this how his dad felt most of the time with work and his anger issues? It probably was, being so over stressed and almost at the brink of blowing up all the time that he needed to take constant breathers. Usually his mom was with him to help make sure he calmed down, the king almost preferred it, since marco was very good with helping him through it. Geez if he was this stressed all the time landon was glad for once he wasn't going to be king. He messed with the strap of his violin case and stood close to his mom, staring at the floor, "I wanna do right by him, i can't help it...I'm not trying to panic so much, i just want to impress him and stuff with our family and everything....i guess i'm jut not used to people coming over..". Marco ran their fingers through their son's hair, trying to comfort them as they walked along portraits of other royal demons, "It's ok to be nervous, but i promise we'll try not to embarrass you so much.". "So much?". "Can't promise you we won't embarrass you at all, though don't worry, we won't bring out any baby photos today.."., he knew his mom was being silly and teasing him but right now it was hard to laugh at the idea, baby photos always looked corny to show off to a crush, especially when you lacked a ton of confidence already. Marco seemed to notice landon's feelings, kissing his cheek and sighing, "You know i got your back mijo, if something happens just let me know..". 'Yeah i know....". Marco tugged them close and placed their other hand on their hips, looking around at the demon portraits and reminiscing, "I know it's a little rough dealing with your feelings right now, but give it time, you'll figure out when you want to talk to him about it soon enough. For now, just get fully comfortable being best friends, it took awhile for me and tom to start dating, so don't rush into it...right now, this is all about getting to spend time in person and having fun and everyone's excited to see him!". "I dunno if i'd really ever be able to confess honestly...". "You will, when you're ready, but not tonight....let's just make tonight fun and stress-free. I think we all needed something like this". "I guess i've just never had a crush before...", landon huffed, trying to fix his hair to the best of his ability, "I Guess it's just weird to like your friend like that.....like maybe it's too soon to think of him that way? Maybe it'll make things....worse between us...i don't want to stop being friends with him".  The human kissed the demon's forehead, nuzzling it, "Crushes aren't easy things to deal with...I should know, but it's perfectly normal to feel like this with someone you really connect with....don't be ashamed to like him...". "He's just cool and nice and i'm being weird....", the queen seemed to find it amusing, "You're just nervous, it's ok, your a handsome young man and you're gonna do great. Just be a good friends to him for now and you can figure out the confusing feelings part later....right now, your one of his closest friends and he's one of yours....just have each other's backs...ok?". Marco was just doing their best as they usually did, and sometimes with landon's downer mind they needed to reassure him over and over, landon just hoped tonight went well and he could fully push his problems to the back of his mind. Then his mother left out a laugh, "Ah, you two remind me of me and your father...a demon hybrid and a human, i think if our relationship can make it despite everything we've been put through, i think you two no matter what will do just fine...". Landon would've had a retort but just then his compact buzzed and he knew what that meant. "I better go get him...i'll be back in an instant...", he was pulled into a tight hug, landon sighing into the embrace before his mom kissed his forehead and landon teleported off. At least it wasn't hard to find bernard's house, moving across from his grandparent's place saved him from needing to remember the address to the exact, though he just hoped his grandparents weren't outside painting or anything, because if they spotted him he was going to have more problems to worry about. Though seems he was lucky this time around, approaching a simple blue home, white fence, and seemingly well kept garden. Bernard mentioned at one point his folks liked to grow their own food though not much seemed to be growing so far, then again bernard never said they were experts at gardening either. Bernard seemed about as eager to get out of the house as landon had been to see him again, trying to struggle out of his mother's arms to head out and meet him. Landon had seen Bernard's parents before when Bernard first moved here and through pictures bernard sent on his phone. Though Landon wasn't sure how well his parents knew him, he'd yet to be over their home yet and honestly his appearance could vary in reactions. Though it almost seemed like earth just didn't care about him having three eyes and horns at all in most cases, he'd had a few incidents of scaring kids before, which of course were on accident but yeah....he wondered what bernard's parents thought. If Bernard hadn't told landon already he was adopted, landon might've found the complete differences between him and his parents jarring, but honestly considering landon himself was born out of magic, being adopted was really not strange despite how bernard made it out at times as he almost had a weird urge to explain it to everyone the second they saw him in comparison to his mom and dad. Landon couldn't help but feel Bernard had been embarrassed by it in the past and that's why it made him so anxious, thought honestly landon felt he had been bullied for worse, and he was royalty. Guess it wasn't fair to judge, but Bernard was too cool in his mind that people picking on him so something as small as being adopted just seemed dumb. Bernard seemed reassured landon didn't care so much though, kinda like how landon was reassured bernard seemed to care less about landon being plain compared to his brothers. It kinda felt nice to have someone to trust like that. Despite all the nonsense going round the two were texting vigorously, talking about their days, terrible moments, exchanging favorite songs or movies. This was probably how Sky felt with melaine the more he thought about it, not being the friend you hang out with 24/7 but the friend you always contact and check up on and get to know through hours of fun communication and calls and video chats. A lot of people were too nervous to talk to their crush and landon knew his favorite colors, celebrities, and was the person he seemed to most confide in when he was grumbling about his family or dealing with echo creek high school. Bernard adjusted his vest and t-shirt and tried to fix his hair as he stuffed some things into his pockets, smiling at the sight of the prince and crossing his arms, "It's good to see you in person again, almost thought your super magic would transfer me through the phone...".  Landon snorted, "Har har...trying to have you come over was just a pain, you're not mad right?". Of course he wasn't mad but he still wanted to ask just to make sure of it. "I'd be mad your family is struggling and are worried for my safety? It's pretty reasonable....you're my personal bodyguard right?". "Well, as long as you don't go out and do anything stupid i won't have to be...". He smiled. Landon felt red as he hoped his already pink skin would hide it a little better, the guy just had a nice smile, and he got way too worked up about it. "So yeah, just don't wander off, don't eat anything we haven't tested already for anything dangerous, don't go outside the castle cause we live on a cliff thing surrounded by lava and you'll die in that kinda heat, and if you need to go somewhere and get something you'll need me to come with you...or one of my parents....maybe judas too...". The human seemed to get it ok, which put him at ease for tonight more. Landon took out his hand and the boy happy took it and held tightly. They teleported back immediately and bernard took a second to get himself together as he looked over the castle halls of the underworld once again, "Y'know, sometimes i have a hard time believing i'm in another dimension...underground...". He was still impressed, so that was a good sign. "Gotta admit though, doesn't it suck to not get snow? Do you guys have a hard time telling when it's dark out or not?". Landon as an answer, redirected him to the nearest window, only adding to his confusion as he saw a purple...sky? "Uh...wait...what?". "We have a sorta magical simulation of a sky, it's not real...but it exists.... "Huh.." "I mean it's more exciting then staring at stalagmites and stone, it even changes depends on the weather....it rains lava down here, so stay close to me if you plan on ever going out, you're not exactly fire proof.". Bernard seemed amused though and impressed, "Don't worry, I wouldn't want to go around out there without you anyway, wouldn't be nearly as fun...". Landon felt a sigh of relief, bernard seemed pretty causal, it was going pretty well so far. "My family is royalty but trust me, they're rarely that formal or anything, well I mean they can be but usually they aren't or anything...". Bernard left the window and put his hands in his pockets, walking side by side with his friend as they strolled the halls together, gaining eyes from passing demons and monsters. "I have a few tricks i wanna show off to them if that's ok? I've been practicing card tricks and I've even gotten better at uh...you know what..", he winked and landon snorted. "I'm not sure that's a good idea to be doing at dinner of all places...". "Maybe not, but i think they'll think it'll be cool! I've been practicing and I get it back out at least 70% of the time now! Which is much better then It used to be", he seemed so proud of it, smiling heavily and making landon smile in return, "Well, that's good! I mean....good for you and all that...doesn't that hurt though?". The human shrugged, "It takes a lot of practice to get the hang of it, my parents don't exactly approve honestly of it, which isn't a surprise but...yeah...". "I mean, don't magicians always say 'Don't try this at home?'" with the kinda stuff you're trying?". "Well i mean, how do people learn to do this if they don't try in the first place?". "Just don't die on me bernard...". "Promise, cross my heart, I won't get myself killed...". It was so much nicer to talk to him in person then just in text and just from calls, Bernard had a soothing voice and it almost contrasted his strange appearance. All his piercings, even a stud in his tongue, his multicolored hair, a vest. Though honestly it made landon feel normal by comparison, everyone always said he looked like a punk and he played something as formal as violin which seemed unfitting for his appearance. They were a couple of oddballs it seemed liked. "How's school back on earth anyway? Still lame?", the demon said with a tint of laughter, trying to make the human laugh. He seemed delighted to earth a smug grin in response as the human droned on, "Could be worse, but don't worry, mel seems to keep my life pretty eventful. She likes to drag me out to her investigations as libraries or just to see movies, i guess without spending so much time with sky she's just kinda happy to have someone to hang around with her...". "My brother's not too big on her, she's kinda weird about us being demons...but she's weird about mewni in general..", landon didn't even see her as much as even he knew enough about her to know when it came to anything that wasn't like normal life on earth it made her wild, and a little annoying. "Sky like showed up on earth one day, mel saw her and they've kept touch ever since, though it's kinda like i'm not sure if they're friends or mel just thinks she's cool...". 'It's a little of both...", the boy's hand pushed some of his hair back, trying to make it a little less messy, "She considers sky her friend and tells her everything, but she also likes the idea of being apart of that world and being the hero of a fantasy story. Though i suppose what she reads in stories isn't the same as in your world?", it was an obvious trick question, but landon shook his head anyway, "Yeah, assumed as much, hey, mel saw a world she always dreamed of and wants to be apart of it....it's kinda fair....your world...is kinda cool...". "It's like..not all fun and magic though..", the prince grumbled, "Like i guess it's cool to an outsider but it can still be super boring and upsetting if you've lived here as long as i have...people suck sometimes, some people hate monsters...some hate mewmans....some just hate...failures...". He coughed into his hand and decided maybe now he better change the subject before things got anymore awkward then it was clearly already getting to be. Lucky for him, he didn't need to, Bernard seemed to notice the tension rather fast himself and immediately got to work. "Hey landon...how ok are your family with like...humans and all that?". "Hmm?". The human almost looked embarrassed, trying to repeat the question in a way that made it sound less strange, "Like, your mom.....they're human right? Are demons down here super cool with humans or is it just your parents or something?". Landon have him a strange look but tried not to think much of it, bernard probably wanted to know as much as possible about this place if he could, it's not exactly like he knew all that much about the underworld outside of some things landon explained every once in awhile. "Well i mean, my grandparents are fine, and most demons seem mostly ok....my grandpa isn't a demon so he had some trouble for awhile but you don't have to worry about my own family getting on your nerves. Don't let being human get to you too much...". Bernard raised an eyebrow at finding out there were more non-demons among them guess it was to be assumed from his perspective only demons would live down in these hot and lava filled landscapes. "Anyways, my family is cool...sorta...don't worry, you'll get used to them...", bernard eased up as landon gave him a tour around the castle for a bit, keeping him close as to make sure he didn't wander off and get himself in trouble on accident. Like landon said, most likely he'd be fine down here but that wasn't to say some demons were harmless and didn't have any vendettas against humans they'd want to cash out on, so better not risk it if he could help it. Bernard was slightly iffy during the tour and Landon couldn't help but feel worried if he was making him feel nervous or scared, though bernard seemed to be trying to hide it and keep smiling and listening regardless. When the dinner bell approached, landon hadn't even realized he grabbed onto bernard's arm to direct him to their dining room till they made it to the door, making landon tense as he immediately removed his hand, blushed and tried to prep the human for his entrance. "Ok so just...act natural, and if my parents or brothers, or grandparents say anything weird...find a way to change the subject". He was sweating wasn't he and he felt bernard's gaze on him, "Landon, you don't gotta be so nervous around me...I'm not doing anything wrong am i?'. Oh shoot, now he was making bernard feel bad, he quickly tried to ease over the situation, "No no no, it's just i've never really had a friend over so I'm worried about making you feel uncomfortable...". "I'll be ok, don't worry so much", now he was trying to help relax landon, "I'm excited! I'm really looking forward to this, i'm sure it'll be great!". Landon sighed as he pushed open the door and forced himself to relax, the rather large door opening and bernard gasping at the sight before him. He'd somewhat seen and met landon's family before, but the giant demon sitting next to a...human? was not what he expected at all, the room was also rather large but then again, demon royalty. There were also a couple of girls he remembered seeing at the sleepover there, but he paid them much less mind. Landon's parents looked more then excited to see him, waving over as they found their seats, bernard struggling to not lose his mind. He seemed more anxious now then he was before, only making landon more nervous, perhaps his grandmother and the large room made him a little nervous? Though as judas looked around, it was a little weird with his parents being lovey as always, judas seemingly engaged in a text conversation with sky, celeste being her grumpy self, and sunny and mason exchanging ideas for the next session of their roleplay game together. Bernard was most likely a little left out, and landon felt himself kinda get a little annoyed at him being mostly ignored as he tried to strike up a conversation, everyone piling food onto their plates. "So...bernard is from earth, he's...new to echo creek..". that was a good opener right? "How you liking echo creek so far?", thank god for his mom on helping him out, the human taking a bite out of their pasta and making their guest fell more at ease. "Oh well, it's alright, the school is ok...it's nothing all that special". Marco looked a little worried they had said anything weird though so bernard tried to explain further, "My family moves a lot, so it's hard to get too attached to a place, i've been to a lot of different states at this point.". "Aww i'm sorry-". "No no, you don't have to apologize! It's not your fault, besides um...it's not bad here, i wouldn't be here today if i hadn't moved here after all!", smooth, that seemed to make things a least a little bit better. Landon's parents were smiling and overall the situation was less awkward then expected. The food was actually really good as well, and eventually judas looked up from his compact to get more involved with the family, though whatever he was presumably texting sky about seemed to worry him greatly. Even Wrath was in a good mood, offering the human more food and cooing so much so, forcing the family to translate for her for a bit so bernard wasn't left confused. As dessert rolled up he found his opening, reaching into his pockets, "So I kinda like.....do magic? I mean, well, not your demon magic...or or....mewman magic either! We humans have our own kinds magic for entertainment purposes, um....is it ok if i show off a few tricks i've been learning?". No one seemed to mind at all actually, if anything everyone seemed ecstatic, sunny and mason were especially excited but that was expected coming from them. Had Bernard ever actually performed in front of an audience before? Maybe his parents and melaine , but usually this wasn't how he normally did things. Nonetheless he started with some simple tricks, pulling coins from ears, doing some simple card magic, pulling things from his sleeves and utterly fascinating them when he appeared to puke cards or pull a handkerchief from his nose. He seemed to feel more confident the further he went along, landon wished he shared more of that confidence sometimes. Everyone was enjoying their lava cake when he got to his grand finale, which left everyone excited but landon a little nervous. Though despite that he was thankful when he saw that bernard was swallowing a small peice of hard candy then a key or stapler or anything of the sort. It didn't seem anyone was actually sure of what he was about to do before he started doing it, swallowing the piece whole before trying to push it back up, however the situation seemed to panic pretty quickly. Wrath starting making troubling growls, dave stood up, tom seemed about ready to use his telekinesis if possbile, judas looked about ready to panic, celete's usual grumpy mood become more concerned, and both the younger kids were speechless. It was not particularly the reaction bernard had wanted at all, even if he was aware this could possibly happen. And landon wasn't sure what he was supposed to do in this kind of situation, it probably wasn't normally for your friend to show off how he could swallow and puke something and then proceed to figure out what to do when it didn't come back up. Marco immediately got on their feet, panicking and turning to landon, "Is he choking?", which led to landon immediately trying to clam them down despite his own anxiety. "N-no it;'s part of the trick, promise, he's just fine.". Though marco didn't seem so sure, walking over before landon tried to somewhat bodyblock his friend who was violently coughing, and if bernard hadn't slammed his fist on the table, swearing under his breath in frustration, marco would of not doubt pushed past their son to give the boy CPR. Bernard looked both embarrassed, and frustrated. He wanted to try again but reading the room told him that was probably not a good idea. Instead he silently excused himself, scooting away his chair and stomping off in utter embarrassment. He shut the door behind him and sighed before leaning against one of the walls nearby, landon rushing out to meet him moments later. Landon looked really upset, though for very different reasons as bernard crawled up in a wall and softly hit his head against the wall. "Hey...dude....it's ok, it just didn't work this time, you can try again later and-". "Your family thought i was choking!". "Well i mean, yeah but....it's part of the trick right? To gag like that to get the thing up your throat?". Bernard pulled at his hair, "They looked so panicked and worried, ugh i screwed the rest of the night up with my stupid tricks didn't i? I was doing so well too and....ugh...". Landon felt a wave of sadness wash over him, wow this really got to him didn't it? He slumped and sat next to the panicked boy against the way, he'd never seen the boy like this before. He'd seen him upset before sure, he was human of course, but not to this extent. He hesitated, before reaching a hand out towards him and resting it on his shoulder, trying to calm him down almost like how his own mother would when he was stressing out. "It's ok, I promise no one's really mad...". "But I am!", he said back, before forcibly trying to hide his face in his shirt, "I was so nervous to be here because i wanted to make a good impression! Y-your family is royalty and powerful and.....I wanted to impress them, i didn't want to screw up...and make them worry and maybe they're creeped out and will think less of me or you and...". Landon tried to get his attention to stop his worried rambling, tugging on his arm and finally getting the boy to calm down a little from his worried panic. "You really cared about my family thinking you were cool? Heh, i was worried you were gonna think my family was uncool....or...scary...the entire night i was panicking about you being scared of them since you hadn't properly met most of them before.". "Landon i'm not scared of your family, they're cool, i've honestly accepted your creepy vibe at this point.....I just don't want them to...not like me.". "You don't need to-". "Landon, you're a prince, you're incredibly talented, and your family is full of chill people. I'm the weirdo between the two of us, I don't really have any friends outside of you and melaine and i might lose you guys too, i still can't master all my tricks perfectly, my family isn't even all that supportive of my hobbies. Like, you shouldn't be trying to impress me, i should be trying to impress you! You are.....you....I'm sorry landon, I'm making you uncomfortable aren't i?". "W-what no?", his face was heating up a little more then he liked right now, but he needed to focus right now, focus on helping bernard feel better. "Bernard...like c'mon, you're super cool! I mean, i'm not even all that good at demon magic and you do pretty good for yourself with human magic! I suck at demon magic like...WAY more, i mean, you can swallow things and spit them out! You got a really pretty singing voice, and you're super friendly...like have you SEEN me? I suck at making friends, or getting along with a ton of people, i like.....sit in my room and hide away from literally everyone...". "Landon...". "Like, you're super cool compared to me....you just seem so confident in yourself and i'm...not...". Now HE was breaking down, and he felt guilty about it as he felt tears coming on, he was trying to comfort bernard and somehow he turned this session into his own weeping fest, feeling the human pull him into a side hug. "Landon...I'm sorry....I-I....I didn't mean to make this night about me....I knew you just wanted it to be a fun night and i turned it into a night about impressing your family...I....I didn't mean to...". His words wandered off as landon wiped at his eyes, "No It's....I want you to get along with my family...and well...i don't want you to beat yourself up...". "Well neither do i!". "then why are we beating ourselves up?!" "I don't...I don't know...I just.....I care ok?" Bernard felt his hair and rubbed his forehead, his fingernails tracing over his piercings. "Look....I didn't actually have really any friends back in my previous homes...i kept trying new persona's everytime we moved to y'know....fit in?". He closed his eyes, "But my friends that i made just....weren't really my friends, they didn't really know me and i was forcing myself to be friends with them and when i moved it was easy for them to forget me and me to forget them...". "Dude...". "But this.....this isn't a persona this time....I swear...i gave up trying to be appealing like my folks wanted me too and well...i decided a year ago to do whatever i wanted so....I dyed my hair, got piercings, decided to do something wild like magic of all things! And here I am now....and somehow...I well....you wanted to actually me my friend cause of it...and i wasn't doing it as an act either...And after everything else i don't want...I don't want to screw this up..". "Well, maybe you're trying too hard....and maybe i get it as well...", the demon got the human's attention away from himself again as he went on, "I kinda do a lot to make sure everything's great for you and maybe that's just too much, you should know my family and what they're like naturally more then me dictating what to do and make everything super perfect...it'[s taking a lot out of them....and a bit out of me it kinda seems...i just wanted you to like it...". Bernard seemed pretty touched, sleeve wiping his tears some more, "That's really nice of you to care that much...even if it was too much...". They finished their moping and starting to weakly laugh, landon trying to fix his running eyeliner. "Then can we make a promise to stop comparing each other and just...stop thinking we're losers? Or maybe...be losers together...?". Bernard snickered, "Maybe that's a good idea....though, i am still sorry for worrying your parents....I didn't mean to make either of us...look bad....", though landon bumped him playfully, like he was used to seeing judas and sky to each other to mess with the other. Bernard seemed to feel a lot better due to landon's shift, and bumped him back, trying to fix his multicolored hair. "I know you didn't mean to, it's ok... don't let this whole thing keep you from practicing...you'll figure it out eventually...". "I know...I just wish now of all times i didn't end up swallowing the candy instead...". "Like i said, my parents are super cool, this won't make them hate you or anything...I promise...they just care about your safety....", he kinda did promise to take care of bernard so that itself probably added another layer to the bad situation, "We should probably go back and see them right?". He knew they'd have to, he couldn't hide here forever, he had to go up and see them again before the night ended. He picked himself up, trying to make himself seem presentable as landon stood up next to him. "Thanks for....talking to me." "I wasn't gonna just leave you upset out here...like i'm responsible for you here and you're my friend...", bernard was more then thankful, working himself to re-enter the room with landon at his side. Though as they entered they could see not everything was as they left it, judas was pacing and mumbling something to himself, still looking as his compact. Celeste was mostly keeping to herself and eating her dessert, the two youngest perked up at their arrival, and the adults in the room were having a discussion that the boys had clearly interrupted. "Ah, see, they're just fine!", marco seemed more then happy with their return, immediately coming up to see the boys and hugging their son. "Uh.....". "Don't take it personally, they were worried bernard left or something...but i told them you'd be fine, I raised you better then to then that and you could handle it.", marco gave their inlaws another look, "Sorry, they're just uncomfortably used to people storming out of dinner and leaving when stuff like this happens. But I'm at least glad to see you both seemed to have talked about the issues and hopefully we can move on from what happened...just be careful with your tricks next time....ok?". Oh "I'm sorry about the trick...", Bernard stepped forward, "I didn't mean to worry any of you so much, i promise landon didn't do anything wrong, i just wanted to do the trick and i'm sorry....", marco let out a relieving sigh and placed a hang on the boy's shoulder, glancing over at the other adults. "Don't worry, i promise we're not mad, i'm glad you're ok, let's just try to make sure the rest of the night is still welcome and not make it all about this ok?". "Thanks..". "I've done much worse when i was younger, i promise you that, it's ok.". Bernard beamed. "What now?", landon mumbled under his breath, "Does he have to go home or....?". But marco shook their head, "No, i think instead let's go and play some games together tonight, is that ok? Judas might be a little distracted to play but hey, might give us a better chance at winning." Marco's smirk was enough for them, and it wasn't even that much longer later when they found themselves going up against tom and marco in a battle of ping pong. Bernard wasn't particularly good at the table sport, bu the laughter and goofing off seemed to make him happier then Landon had seen him in a long time. At one point they even knocked into each other and landon felt himself blush hard before laughing it off. He hoped they were allowed to have more days like this in the future, well, minus all the crying but at the very least having fun and getting to let all their emotions out with each other in person. There seemed to be a good chance after this night they'd get more days to hang out, at least he hoped so. By the time he finally went home, he was already planning on another visit in the near future. Maybe someday soon landon would build enough courage to make an actual move with him, but for now, this was just fine. Any opportunity to hang out and get to understand each other a little more was good enough for now, he could worry about the crush aspect later. There had been a lot of rough nights for the past few months or so but as soon as he fell on his mattress, he'd slept the best he'd slept in a very long time. Though the same could sadly not be said for his older brother in his own bed, having texted sky constantly over and over because of her most recent accusation. His eyes looking straight at the ceiling, he'd been thinking about it since she mentioned it and it was hard to get it out of his mind.  Was that why the masked being looked at him so long before, because angel's parents liked him? But the queen couldn't be running around if she was sick right? Unless she was faking it and this was some elaborate scheme in it's entirely. He couldn't sleep thinking things like this, no matter how hard he tried. Especially with the thought that she was right inside the castle right now, she had got inside, with nora, sky, luna, and lexi. It was not a good feeling, at all, and they didn't even know they were right yet so he wasn't even sure if he should confront it, though if he did he could get someone hurt, but if he said nothing someone could still get hurt. He couldn't stop worrying and Sky definitely sensed it from the other side of the compact screen, trying her best to not have him panic. Judas was typically the level-headed one after all, but also the most caring and protective. He tossed and turned in his bed before sitting up and tussling his messy dark hair. No, if this had any chance of being true, they needed to confront this sooner then later. He took his charging compact from his nightstand and flipped it open to find who he needed and sighed. Judas: Nora....we need to talk about this It was a little while later till she responded. Nora: Judas...is everything ok? What do you need to talk about? Judas: Meet me tomorrow, in the gardens, we need to talk further about the arachfords

[fair-dinkum-mechanic]

i have a LOT going on in my brain right now and I’ve just let my emotions rule me and I’ve dug myself into such an ugly and heartbreaking situation ignoring all the signs on my way because i was feeling happy. 

I don’t know what to do. First time in ages I actually don’t want to talk about it with.. anyone, but it’s been eating me alive every second of every fucking day lately and I’m so tired. 

One thing I know though; I’m ugly. Maybe ugly is too harsh a word, perhaps undesirable is the right one. Looking at me objectively, I’m not nearly enough to be anyone’s first choice. Sure, my looks may have been able to carry me through if I wasn’t also extremely mentally ill - which overrides any personality traits I have because of the stigma around mental illness and romance, I can see that I’m not seen as the kind of person stable enough to build a life with or support. 

I’ll also say that I hate my heritage for the first time in my life, actually. I don’t want my nose or my brown eyes or my height, I hate all of them, they make me feel so damn inadequate and I’m going to save up as much as I can to change it if I can’t work with them in a significant way. 

This is so ridiculous because I really don’t mind these things on others, but for me, I find it completely unacceptable. In fact, I am attracted to ‘imprefections’ on people. Fuck, the perceived ‘imperfections’ on the guy I’ve fallen for are honest to god some of my favourite things about him. 

I think a lot of issues with me at the moment is not being able to speak freely and openly, but I’m such a chatterbox and honest that my conversations always slip into dangerous territory when there’s underlying tension, which in turn makes it look like I’m dramatic and emotional. Which, yeah I probably am when there’s a huge situation because I get so overwhelmed and anxious but I try my best to fight through those feelings and sort out whats in front of me and resolve it as best it can be. 

I’ve just been so fucking down these past few days... so fucking flat and joyless. I’ve been trying my hardest to keep face with people close to me because I know all of my issues are internal but... they notice and it just makes me look worse.  I don’t want to do that to any of them. It hurts, and it makes me feel even worse. 

I think another thing that’s really, really dragging me down lately is that I don’t think that I have an idea of romantic love anymore. I’ve spoken to my friend at length about this, and he says my views are shifting too. Ever since I was a kid I valued that kind of deep, trusting, happy, and warm connection and I’ve always yearned for it but I can honestly say that I’ve (aside from perhaps two situations) found that feeling with anyone. Why am I yearning for something that doesn’t exist? All romance I’ve seen in my life, with perhaps maybe 1 exception, hasn’t been healthy. My own love life is a disgrace, and the exact opposite of what I believed and hoped love was. For the past two weeks or so I’ve been sitting in a position where I actually don’t believe that romantic love is real, and if it is, it’s not important or priority. It’s really crushed something inside me, though, that realisation, and I’m seeing everything as really calculated and cold and it’s really, really, really hurting. That’s life though, just because hard reality is painful that doesn’t change it and it won’t change it. 

I’ll forever have my own feelings though. If they’re love or whatever they are, I know that at least they’re real, for me. They cause deep issues and terrible discomfort and resentment, but they’re not selfish and they’re not malicious and I want to hold onto them. I’ll always wish for the day where I have a best friend with me every day, waking up with me, talking to me about menial things, getting ridiculously shitty with me when i forget his preferred lunch during my shop, watching things together, playing pokemon go or going out to wildlife parks. I know that realistically, it’s not going to happen, not with anyone, but there’s just somethign in me that is refusing to give up the desire for it. It’s both infuriating that I won’t stop hoping, and heartwarming. 

I wish I could better express the love i feel in me without coming across as desperate or crazy or obsessive or whatever, but I’m honestly doing the best that I can. And I’ll always try to do better. 

Perhaps I do believe that nothing is impossible if you do work for it. Perhaps even this perceived love that I’ve yearned for my whole life. I just want to know where it comes from. It’s been with me ever since I was very, VERY young. What’s wired differently in my brain to make me value this so, so much. It’s like the most important thing in my life and it always has been. Asked about the future? The answer has always been “yeah i hope im an author or a writer of some sort, or an entertainer, but more than anything I hope i have a warm loving home that i’ve worked toward with the best person in my life”

what the fuck Marc. I feel so fucking pathetic. This is why I never talk about these things with anyone, because I feel so weak and so delusional and ridiculous that I can only imagine that they’ll widen their eyes and edge away from me because I’m just... so misguided and ficticious. Also, I’m ashamed that I have such a romantic heart and romantic dreams. How can I be so ashamed and so embarrassed of something that’s literally one of the most important things to me? 

also no one has ever had a crush on me that knows me in real life to any extent and that makes me feel so......fucking average and that when i have feelings for someone that it’s embarrassing for them and that its like...shameful that me of all people likes them. I feel guilty for having feelings for people because of my self-esteem and shit. But NO ONE has ever liked me romantically who knows me in real life. And it hurts. So much lol.  nobodys reading this full ass fucken novel though. Which is okay I’m getting my thoughts down. Online. On the internet. On social media. Because its the only place where i can feel like im talking to someone when I’m too scared to talk to anyone about it. And it’s only about my own feelings. gshgksghdg this is so fucking painful having to just put a lock on my feelings at absolute risk of destroying everything and condemning myself to isolation and judgement. 

[komowah-blog]

Sarada’s Sharingan | Boruto Theory

 heres a theory about Sarada, cuz duh mate, i idolize her. shes a cute tsun-tsun, and has much potential. sorry if theres like spelling mistakes, not grammar. i may use grammar in some sentences, some not. please like if you enjoyed~

Most of this is from Quora, paraphrased and applied to this theory subject. This covers her cannon MS design, what triggers her MS, and evolution.

PS: THIS WILL COVER A LOT WITH SASUKE AND ITACHI, DON’T GET MAD PLS BC OF HOW MUCH INFO IM SAYING ABOUT EM

PS 2.0: THIS WILL COVER THINGS ABOUT SAKURA AND uhh DEATH DON’T GET OFFENDED I LUV HER 2 BUT

Now, now. Here’s just basically random things about Sarada’s sharingan. Let’s start with... What is the Sharingan?

Sharingan is developed when an Uchiha member experiences a powerful emotion (about a person close to them). During this emotional moment the brain releases a special form of chakra that affects the optic nerves and transforms the eye into the Sharingan. 

(Credits to Hemanth Mothkuri on Quora!~)

Evolution

So. Her evolution of the Sharingan. From now, (ep 90) we still only had one tomoe. She should atleast have two, in my opinion. Too bad, though. Sasuke Uchiha, awakened double tomoe when he was fighting Haku. Would they be able to unlock their second tomoe when under stress, and saving someone they are really close to? Haku appeared episode nine from the original Naruto series, which is really fast for Sasuke to get double-tomoe. But then again, Sasuke unlocked his sharingan in a very young age. He unlocked second tomoe in his right eye first. Example:

It is unclear when we see his left eye unlock it, but just know that it’s one eye first after another. 

So basically, here’s a list when we see his Sharingan unlock.

One tomoe:

He unlocked during the Uchiha massacre.

Double tomoe:

On the Great Naruto Bridge, part I of Haku and Zabuza.

Three tomoe:

Fighting Naruto at the Final Valley of the End.

I’ve been noticing a pattern, here. You first unlock the Sharingan when experiencing a great and intense emotion. For Sarada, it was seeing her dad for the first time. The double tomoe, you unlock protecting someone close to you, or INTENSE training. Triple tomoe, you unlock fighting the person who was close to you. 

Let’s compare this to Itachi.  When Team 2 was given the task of guarding the Fire Daimyō, the company was attacked by Obito. Tenma attacked Obito and was killed in the fight. This emotional moment caused Itachi to awaken his Sharingan. Credit to Henmath Mouthkiri on Quora. :)

This was on episode 453: The Pain of Living. It can also be retrieved in itachi Shinden: Book of Bright Light.  I’m not too sure on him getting his second tomoe, and third tomoe. But, we do know how he got his Mangekyo Sharingan. Probably, just witnessing Shisui's death to protect the village was traumatic enough for Itachi to awaken his Mangekyou. Itachi, the only person I know so far to manifest two tomoe in one go, was a deep thinker. The death of his teammates and his will to do something about it though his friends were already dead made him desperate. But his will against the desperation held on due to his inquisitive nature (by which he kept himself inside the desparation long enough to generate enough of the unique chakra) and he managed to unlock enough power for the two tomoe sharingan. It can be that this is how an Uchiha is able to contain and harness the power of the Sharingan. Credit to JNat on Animestackexhange :) Credit to Tehol Beddict on Quora, too!

All in all, Sarada will get double tomoe, soon. But don’t get your hopes high in case that doesn’t happen in the few next episodes.

Mangekyou Sharingan

How will Sarada Uchiha retrieve the Mangekyou Sharingan? It’s like experiencing unlocking the Sharingan but the trauma is 10x more. Sasuke unlocked Mangekyo Sharingan by witnessing Itachi’s death. Even though he didn’t murder him, Itachi died of tuberculosis or lung cancer. Same with Itachi, he witnessed Shisui’s suicide. Itachi was a deep thinker, so no wonder he’d get his double-tomoe in one go, and Mangekyou Sharingan. Itachi lost everyone, and so did Sasuke. Sasuke couldn’t get Mangekyou because of how young he was, and he would have that much chakra prepared for the doujutsu. Many theorists believe that Sarada will fight Boruto, I don’t think so. They don’t have a rivalry like Sasuke and Naruto. They have a protection relationship, and which is “I want to get stronger for I can protect you.” Either Sasuke or Sakura will die for Sarada, to get her MS. Naruto is out of the question, since he will be training Kawaki, he won’t be Sarada’s mentor. Please note, not every Uchiha needs to experience death, I want to see somethign creative and peaceful for Sarada to push aside all the hatred, but hey! This is just a theory. :) And, she’d just awaken it by strong feelings, like Obito. He didn’t lose anyone, but just his emotions. 

Sasuke

First of all.. look at Boruto. 

Besides the fact that Boruto is fine ;) look at everything. Now, this is one of the most obvious theories.. but look.

Boruto has the following from his master, Sasuke..

Kusanagi

Cloak

Headband

Now, it would be reasonable if Sasuke gave Boruto his headband. Like in the Momoshiki Arc, I can see that. But his weapon? His cape? Hmm? Be reasonable, look. The sword he has had since a teen? His cloak that hides his arms, and his headband is ok. I personally, don’t think Sasuke will die. Kishi will lose about 80% of the fanbase if Sasuke dies. (i’d stay tho :) ). In my opinion, the flashforward is bait. I have some pictures on what Kishi has drewn himself for promotional pictures of Sarada grown up. She has an MS, if you were wondering. ;) 

I couldn’t find much and think about the rest, but Sakura has a big way up ahead.

Sakura

Most definitely. She will die in my opinion, for Sarada to move on. It’s not because I hate her, but this is one reason on how I imagine Sarada getting her Sharingan upgraded. Why, though? 

Sakura is irrelevent in Boruto now. She isn’t a main character anymore, she doesn’t play a role. 

We all know Sarada and Sakura’s relationship. Sakura even raised her by herself. Sakura is a amazing opportunity. Also, her death will not only be amazing for Sarada’s development.. but her relationship with Sasuke, too. Wouldn’t it be interesting to see Sarada start falling in the Curse of Hatred by that and Sasuke stepping in to help her not commit all the sins and mistakes he did? Or, what about Sarada accusing him o fhis own wife’s death and not being sad, or feel any emotion for it? Massive chances are at stake here by this single event, which is by a character we don’t use anymore. As much as I love Sakura, and would most likely cry to see her die, this is an amazing opportunity. I know, you’re sad too. Kishi claimed that in Boruto, no older gen characters are safe from death. He also claimed it will get a LOT darker, and may be no happy ending. Let’s continue on.

Finally, because of the cause of Sakura’s death, we could actually see her fighting again, some spotlight on her. She hasn’t gotten some lately, besides Sasori and Shin. She was used as a chakra batter for Obito, getting a single hit in Kaguya or bursting some Juubi fodder won’t count, let’s try to see something special for her, and only her. She had a big fighting will in part one, but now she’s just a housewife. 

Overall, I see Sakura with the biggest potential of  her death. Sasuke is too important to die like that yet, but someone needs a boost for Sarada for her sweet, sweet, lovely, Uchiha porwerup. There are too many doors open for her death. There’s no risk involved, also.

Credits to Ian Schumann on Quora! ^^ 

ily boo

Now, let’s see some pictures.

Kishimoto hints

Sasuke will take the ‘Jiraiya’ role, in that case, he’s too important to kill of like I’ve stated before.

However, while Jiraiya died around two thirds into the story, I simply can’t see Sasuke getting rid of, at least not that early. And its important to note here that if this were to happen, it would HAVE to happen somewhere relatively early, though we’ll get to that soon enough.

The fact is that he’s just too strong. A threat able to defeat someone of his level would be well beyond the main characters’ abilities as things are now and anywhere in the nearby future as a matter of fact. Furthermore if he were to be killed, that would cause all hell to break loose way too early. The logical next step after all is for Naruto himself to step in, as he’s the only one strong enough to take on someone at that level.

But then what? Have Naruto killed by the same threat? No…it does build this threat up a lot, but its basically the same thing twice. What about having Naruto defeat the threat? Again, no, that doesn’t work. It would make Sasuke’s death seem pointless and drive away attention from the new generation.

The point I’m getting at is that Sasuke’s death at any early point in the story would just be playing one’s cards too soon, especially at the sole benefit of Sarada. It leaves little leeway for the plot to move on and more so complicates things than builds them up.

All of this was retrieved from Ian Schumann on Quora, that’s why you see block-quotes around. Sasuke is too important to kill off. 

Blindness

Now, if Sarada got MS, would she get blind? Well, Sarada has glasses, which can somewhat help her but I doubt it. Sasuke could either take her to where he kept his eyes. To swap them out, but she’d need MS that time. (Also supports how Sakura’s part would come in play). This is a short concept, because not much evidence will be supported but, will edit when I think of a good theory!~

Sarada’s MS Design

Little extra ^3^

This artwork was drawn by Kishimoto himself, previewing Boruto’s teen years. Her MS design is like a flower / sun.Example:

[fictitiousmagines]

I Fuckin' Mean It.  (Carl Fluff)

Imagine: Babysitting Liam a year after Carl broke your heart the year before.. It’s hard enough to avoid him, as your neighbor. It’s only for a few hours right?

Note: I’m new to this!

Y/N was nestled on her porch swing, Her knees with drawn inwards as she swayed. It was uncharacteristically cool for the middle of summer. She was hellbent on enjoying every bit of it. She was halfway through The Great Gatsby, with no real plans for today.

“Fuck!” Fiona growled from across the street. She hastily snapped her phone shut before running a tense hand through her tangle of curls.

Y/N was no stranger to the notorious Gallagher clan. She had a fling with Carl shortly after she arrived to the neighborhood. It was short lived, as most young relationships tended to go.

Underneath it all, Carl was sweet. He’s the type of person that required a second look. They’d sneak out and sit in the van. His face would be inches from hers as they talked.He’d lazily throw an arm around her thick waist to yank her closer. She’d squeal at his sudden display of strength. “You’re fucking beautiful,” he’d growl in her ear. He liked all the things she tended to hate about herself. Carl made her feel like she could glow from the inside out.

But Carl was equal amounts of light and dark. When he was thrown in Juvie, she assumed they’d pass the year with notes and visits. Her young heart was overflowing with nothing but hope. Reality hit hard with his one and only letter to her. A wrinkled scrap of paper hastily shoved in an envelope.

“Don’t write. Don’t visit.”

Needless to say, Y/N was crushed. Carl wasn’t the boy that brought a hot blush to her cheeks anymore. He was another South Side boy consumed with greed and the need to prove himself.

It wasn’t easy to avoid him, when he got out early. She remained on good terms with his family. Whenever he came into proximity, she was out of there, like a shot. Especially with Dom right on her hip. Still, as she turned to go his eyes followed her anyways. It made her skin crawl. The last think Y/N wanted, was pity from Carl Gallagher.

Fiona’s voice roke her out of her daze. “Hey! Y/N!” She said jobbing over. “You busy?” She asked, nearly breathless.

“Naw,” Y/N said snapping her book shut.

“Uh, Ian really flaked out on me. He was SUPPOSED to watch Liam. He’s not answering his phone. I really gotta get to work. My boss is gonna have my ass if I’m late. You mind watching him? I’ll give ya ten bucks. Someone should be back soon. 2-3 hours. Max!” Fiona’s voice was filled with desperation.

Y/N chewed on her lip and nodded. She wanted to say no. She really did. Despite lingering embarrassment, she knew missing work was rarely an option when you’re poor.

Fiona groaned with relief and grabbed Y/N’s hand, tugging her forward. She rattled off the do’s and don’ts of babysitting Liam as the made their way across the street. Rules, she was vaguely familiar with. THe door slammed behind them as YN’s eyes fell on Liam. “Y/N!” He yelled before clinging himself to her legs. “Hi Buddy,” she grinned before picking him up for a hug. “You’ve gotten so big!”

Fiona glanced up before fishing a ten out of her purse and pressing it into Y/N’s palm. “You be good okay?” She kissed Liam’s cheek with an audible smack. He giggled and held Y/N closer.

“Stuff for spaghetti is in the fridge if he get’s hungry,” said as she slung her purse over her shoulder. “Thank you!” The door’s slam rang out through the oddly quiet house.

“What now?” Y/N said before ticking Liam’s hip. “Trucks!” He cried matter o’ factually. She set him square on his feet and nodded. “Alright than! Trucks it is.” He scurried around the living-room floor, collecting Hotwheels in his tiny hands.It’s been awhile, but not much had changed. Still cluttered. Still homey.

“Here!” He said thrusting a fist full of cards towards her. She sank down to the floor and followed Liam’s lead. The thing about playing cards is, explosions are a must. Or at least that’s what he had spent the last hour teaching her.  “Oh no!” She gasped. She feigned screeching sounds before pushing her car towards his. “Boom,” he giggled before running his car into hers. She sighed dramatically. “Ya got me again!” He gave her car an extra bump for good measure.

“Ya hungry bud?”

“Mhmm,” he mumbled absentmindedly.

She padded into the kitchen, poking around. She pulled a big pot out of the cupboard and filled it with water. She quickly chopped up peppers and onions before throwing it all in with the sizzling hamburger. Between the hum of the kitchen and the occasional noise from the living-room, she grew content.

“Hmm,” she mumbled as she sprinkled salt and pepper into the frying mixture.

Liam crept into the kitchen with a small pail of Legos. He He quickly got to work snapping the toy bricks together. “Oooh! Cool!” she said glancing at his newest creation. She snapped the jar of sauce open and poured it into the . She almost didn’t hear the door slam. Almost.

“Ian?”

“Nope. Wrong Gallagher,” a familiar voice called out.

Fuck.

“Please be Lip. Please be Lip,” she mouthed silently. Her muscles instantly tightened as tension racked her entire body. She gave the sauce another stir before putting it on simmer.

“Uh, hey? What’re you doing here?”

Y/N tapped the spoon on the edge of the pan, shaking off the dripping sauce. “Um,” she stammered as she turned around. “Fiona had to go to work. Ian didn’t show up. So she asked me to watch him.”

They stood in silence awkwardly observing each other. Gone were the cornrows and baggy clothes. He was taller than last year. Arms had the promise of muscle from under his work shirt. He stared at her from under furrowed brows. She’d changed from the year before. He had a flash to the pudgy girl he’d sneak into the van to see. How good it felt to hold her. Kiss her. Naturally, he glanced at her chest. Shifting downwards he could make out the curve of her hips from underneath that sundress. Her curves, her curves, her curves. Even the thought of them caused  a lump in his throat. A mixture of guilt and lust.

“So…The spaghetti’s nearly done,” she said with a slight tremble. That’s somethign carle secretly liked. Her vulnerability. Not many South Side kids got away with that.

He nodded and sat next to Liam, feigning interest in his Legos.  He kept stealing glances at Y/N. The tension was thick in the air, but Liam was oblivious as he happily played.

“Need any help?”

“Naw,” she shook her head before pouring the noodles into the strainer.

“Smells good. I didn’t know you could cook,” he mumbled into dead air.

She chuckled and shook the strainer. Droplets of steaming water feel freely. “Yeah. Well, I’m a lady of many talents,” Y/N joked shyly.

“Look,” Liam said as he raised a mangled clump of Legos up.

“Speaking of talent!” She gasped. “Liam, you’re so good at building things,” she said warmly as she enfolded him into a quick hug. Carle missed the warmth in Y/N’s voice. The way she’d coo and purr in his ear, making him feel like the only man on the earth. “Fuck,” he thought bitterly. “I’m so fucking stupid.” He tried so harm to be what Dominique needed. Somehow he always came up short.

“Here ya go, Bud,” she said brushing his toys aside. She placed a bowl of pasta in front of Liam.

“Well,” she said straightening up. “I’ll leave you to it. Food’s ready if you’re hungry.”

“You’re going?”

“Mhmm.”

She wiped her hands on a spare dish rag before tossing it onto the counter. “Well, she did say until one of you showed up.”

“You don’t have to go, Y/N. C’mon. Stay. Eat with us. Right Liam? You want her to stay, don’t you?”

Liam nodded, a mouth full of noodles.

She shook her head sadly before making a break for the door. Unfortunately, Carl was fast.

“Y/N,” he said as he caught her in the wrist by the living room. “C’mon. Stay. Please,” he begged.

She twisted her wrist out of his grip and turned her head away. “Why?”

He shoved his hands in his pockets. “I’ve missed you.”

She snorted indignantly. “You’ve looked okay to me,” she said sitting on the arm of the couch.

“I fucked up. I know that. You know that. Okay? I’ve just-I’ve missed you,” he growled as he hastily sank down into the arm chair.

“If fucked up means writing that pussy letter. I’d say yeah, you did.”

“I was facing a year. I-I thought it’d be easier,” he said quietly.

Her lip quivered slightly before she blinked away the tears threatening to fall. She focused her attention to fidgeting with the hem of her dress.

“I’m glad it was easy for you, Carl. I figured it was a typical Gallagher move. Ya know? Pushing away anyone that could care. Really care. But-But you couldn’t even give me the time of day when you got out,” she said coldy.

“It’s not like you’ve been around Y/N. “GOD!” He groaned. “Anytime I get near you, you’re fuckin’ outta there.”

“Well, you got your wish Carl. You can’t have it both ways,” She hissed. “Expect me to come up to you and Dom? ‘Excuse me, can I talk to your boyfriend for a sec?’“ She mocked spitefully.

He’d never seen her mad before. Truth be told, he couldn’t decide whether her wanted to yell at her, or kiss her. Underneath layers of sweetness, she was fiery.

“Want did you want me to say? ‘Hey, I know you don’t want me but I’m in lo-’” She stopped short, realizing what threatened to spill out of her mouth.

Carl shoved himself out of the chair and slowly walked towards her. He stopped and positioned himself right in front of her. “Finish the sentence,” he urged as he stared down at her. His fingers lightly brushed above her knees, sending electricity throughout her body. She shook her head and sighed. “This is stupid,” she laughed. “Because if you think for one minute that-”

She was cut off by the familiar sensation of Carl’s lips against her own. He lifted her legs, urging them around his waist as he leaned down to deepen the kiss. Y/N melted completely into the sensation, grabbing a fist full of his wavy locks. She gasped as he pressed a firm kiss to her neck. She instinctively tightened her legs around his waist, pulling him closer. He gently nipped at her favorite spot. Right below her ear. The place only he knew about.

“Mmm, wait,” she purred. “Liam,” she said motioning to the kitchen.

“I thought about you the whole time, ya know.”

Her hands crept around his neck, as she looked up at him contently.

“In juvie, he continued. “Wondering if you were okay. I missed you. Now, I could give you a million bullshit excuses. But I just… I fucked up. And all I can say is, I’m sorry.”

She chewed on the corner of her lip as he considered his apology. He tilted her chin up as he went in for a kiss.

“Hey,” he whispered against her lips. “I mean it okay? Fuckin’ stupid to let you go.” He placed a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth. He traveled to her neck as he planted smaller ones along the way. Y/N’s breath hitched she felt his hot breath in her ear. “I ain’t even making that mistake again. I love you.”

[yatokamiii]

Lovers that went wrong

"Dazai no don't go please!" Chuuya shouted as the taller male bulled his coat over his shoulders. Dazai's eyes were casted downwards at the floor, a solemn look polluting them and dulling the color. "Dazai, answer me! Scream, shout, say somethign!" Chuuya grabbed at Dazai's bandaged arm, pleading him to speak. Dazai jerked Chuuya's grip off of his arm, knocking the redhead onto the floor. Chuuya stared up at Dazai, speechless.

"I don't want to hear anything from you. How about you go to your new lover-boy? He seemed to do just fine for you last night." Dazai ripped his gaze away from Chuuya before slamming the front door after him. Chuuya sat on the floor in front of the front door, frozen. He didn't notice the tears that rolled down his cheeks as he began to sob on the ground in his apartment. He pulled himself to his knees, before clasping his hands over his face. 

Dazai stormed down the staircase that led up to Chuuya's apartment. He rubbed the tears that welled up in his eyes, and he tried to get the image of Chuuya under another man out of his mind. He bit the inside of his cheeks as he stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, letting the rain pour down on him, soaking him down to the bone. Dazai picked his feet back up and walked back to his own apartment with determination to fulfill his plan.

Once he reached the familiar front door that he hadn't walked through in about a week, he paused. Taking a deep breath, he turned his key in the lock and waited for the click before pushing it open and slamming it shut after him. He threw his coat over the back of the couch and stormed into his kitchen, opening his cabinet of pills. He grabbed a bottle from the top shelf and yanked the cap off. Filling the cup next to the sick with water, he poured half the contents of the bottle into his palm and tossed them into his mouth. gulping down the water, swallowing the little white ovals, he let the welled up tears rool down his cheeks right before his vision went black.

~~

Chuuya sat at the bar in his apartment, drinking whatever he could find. Any bottle that was within his reach was emptied within the matter of minutes. After hours of drinking, empty wine and vodka bottles littered the floor. He just wanted to drown out the memory of that night. The sounds of him moaning another man's name, the feeling of another man inside of him, him clawing at strange shoulders, and unfamiliar hair burying itself in the crook of his neck. The sight of Dazai standing in the doorway of what Chuuya considered their bedroom. The shocked look on his face. The hurt in his eyes. The way his mouth hung open a bit. The morning after. The way Dazai just sat on the cuch, causally reading his book. The look in his eyes when Chuuya made himself known. Dazai's heavy footsteps towards his coat next to the door. The way he threw Chuuya away from him. The look in his eyes before he slammed the door, cutting their connection. Chuuya folded his arms on the countertop and cuddled his head into them, releasing loud sobs that were muffled due to the small space. 

He missed the familiar bandaged arms that would wrap around him in his times of distraut, the way Dazai felt in every aspect. Their night they spent fucking into the wee hours. Or the nights that they spent just cuddling and enjoying each other's company. Every mission they went on. Every time Dazai saved Chuuya from his own ability. Every dumb movie they watched. Every popcorn fight. Every little nickame that they spat at each other. Every memory of his relationship with Dazai was drowned by his one fuck up.

Chuuya reached for his phone on the edge of the counter. He opened the screen, squinting a bit at the sudden bright light. His fingers automatically dialed the number of his one and only, and he brought the phone up to his ear. It rang about 6 times before going to his voicemail.

'This is Dazai, leave a message after the beep !' Dazai's beautifully bubbly tone rang through Chuuya's head, initiating more tears to escape from his eyes.

"Dazai." Chuuya's voice was coarse and broken, cracking with every word. "Please call me. I miss you. I know I fucked up but can't we fix this? Please. I'm begging you." Chuuya slurred before a beep sounded, ending his messgae and sending it. He pulled the phone away from his ear and dialed again.

'This is Dazai, leave a message after the beep !'

"Dazai come on. It's been three days. Can't we at least talk about this? Please? Dazai?" The beep cut him off. Chuuya slammed his head back into his arms and sobbed until he fell asleep.

~~

Chuuya woke up with a pounding hangover that felt like a massage compared to the pain he felt in his heart for what he did to Dazai. He picked up his phone and quickly checked for any missed calls, but to no avail. His screen showed no new notifications. Just the picture of him and Dazai at Chuuya's favorite restaurant from their one-year anniversary. He opened the phone and dialed the same number again.

'This is Dazai, leave a message after the beep !'

"Dazai. It's me again. Please. At least let me know you're okay. I just need to hear your voice. And not an automated machine. The real you. Please." He was once again cut off by the beep. He decided to shower and personally go over to Dazai's apartment.

After the boiling hot shower and Chuuya's relentless effors to try and scrub the guilt off of him, he placed his hat on his head and closed the door. Walking briskly down the street, weaving through people and dodging cars or food stands. In what felt like hours, he made it to the staircase that led to the apartment, he climbed up the three flights it took to get to Dazai's flat. Chuuya took a deep breath as he stood in front of the door, slowly raising his hand and knocking quietly. Footsteps grew louder as someone approached the front door. Chuuya's heart began to beat faster and he held his breath. The lock clicked and the door opened, only to reveal the blond man that was Dazai's business partner known as Kunikida.

"Oh, Mr. Nakahara. What brings you here?" Kunikida asked, resting one hand on the doorknob and one in the pocket of his pants.

"Where's Dazai? I need to talk to him, right now." Chuuya tried to sound as together as possible, but his voice came out more desperate than he had intended.

"I thought you had heard. He made another attempt on his life the other night. Swallowed over half a bottle of pills. We found him the next morning maybe an hour away from death. He's in the hospital right now." Kunikida explained calmly. Chuuya's mind raced in every direction.

"Oh my god." Chuuya whispered to himself. "What hospital is he in?" chuuya demanded.

"Yokohama General, room 237." Chuuya took off running without saying any thanks you or goodbye to Kunikida. His legs took him to the hospital half a mile away in under thirty minutes. Sprinting to the front desk, he slammed both his hands on in and attempted to catch his breath.

"I'm here to visit Mr. Dazai Osamu. He's in room 237." His breath came short and rapid.

"Go ahead sir." The receptionist answered as she handed him a visitor's pass. He walked quickly down the hallway, careful not to hit any doctors or patients that could be coming down the hall. He reahed room 237 and stopped. His hand rested gently on the doorknob. After taking two deep breaths, he opened it quietly, poking his head in. He found the sight of his love laying still in the pure whie bed, a blanket laid carefully across the lower half of his body.

"He's in a coma right now. He was found by two of his co-workers and brought here. We believe that he'll survive this, we have him on life support."

"Is it possible for me to, uhm," Chuuya paused a bit. "Is it possible for me to stay with him? You know until he wakes up?" Chuuya stuttered a bit. The doctor looked over to him and nodded.

"Of course, sir. If you'll excuse me." The doctor bowed slightly before exiting. Chuuya stared at the limp body before pulling a chair next to the bed. He rested his gloved hand on top of Dazai's cold one. The IV quietly dripped and machines steadily beaped in the bitter silence of the sterile room. Chuuya's eyes began to drip slaty tears down his cheeks as he squeezed Dazai's hand, waiting for the hand to squeeze back.

"Dazai? I don't know if you can hear me, but, I just wanted to say," Chuuya stuttered and paused, swallowing back additional tears. "I'm so sorry. I know I fucked up. I REALLY fucked up. Please Dazai. Please forgive me. And iff you do, I'll make sure that I never hurt you like this, ever again." Chuuya stopped as he felt a stir under his hands. He quickly looked up to Dazai's face to see the brown eyes slowly open. Chuuya gasped. "Dazai. You're okay."

"Chuuya?" Dazai's voice was hoarse from disuse. "Where am I?" He questioned and began to attempt to sit up, only to be stopped by Chuuya's hand on his shoulder.

"You're in the hospital. Kunikida and Atsushi found you in your apartment passed out from an overdose." Chuuya paused. "I was so worried."

"Why do you care? I thought you were over me." Dazai shook Chuuya's touch off of him and averted his gaze towards the window.

"No, I'm not. I know I fucked up, Dazai. And I can't possiby feel like I've apologized enough. But I'm so sorry." Chuuya pleaded.

"Chuuya I need you to go." Dazai mumbled, his voice breaking slightly. Chuuya inhaled his breath and hung his head. Standing up and placing his hat back on his head, and stepped out of the room. Holding back the tears that threatened to soak his cheeks, he walked briskly towards the elevator.

~~

Alone in his apartment that night, he sat in the same stool and drank the contents of the bar. He opened and chugged every bottle that had even the smallest amount of booze in it, numbing his brain. Holding his head in his hand, his eyes drooped from the affects of exhaustion, sadness and the alcohol. Only a few tears slid down his cheeks. After finishing a bottle of Chuuya didn't even know what, he heard a small knock on his door. He sighed and dragged himsle fover to the slab of wood. Cracking the door open, he was greeted by the sight of Kunikida.

"Kunikida? How did you get my address?" Chuuya raised an eyebrow.

"It's listed as a secondary home on Dazai's papers and he has it written in his apartmnet." Kunikida answered blatently. Chuuya could feel his the remains of his heart shatter.

"Oh."

"Speaking od Dazai, I came to inform you that he passed away today in the hospital. We'll be holding a funeral in a few days." Kunikida slipped a black piece of paper through the crack of the door. Chuuya nodded.

"Thank you." Chuuya whispered before closing and locking the door. His back slammed against the wall and he slid

down slowly, hand tightening on the little black paper. Sobs were thrown into the atmosphere as Chuuya drowned in his tears and his thoughts.

'I caused this.' Was the final thought that went through his mind before his eyes closed.

He hoped that his vision would be black for good.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yeah I was gonna make this have a fluffly ending

Guess not

Thank you for reading!

Leave anything you want me to write in my ask box or messgaes :)

[dreambook06]

Dream from: May 19, 2018

Very brief there is soo sooo much more to say about all this than what im about to say of course. here goes. it’s already fading as i begin.

some idek weird schoolworld idk! a scrapbook with colorful photos of the old school but it was like washington showing the old cafeteria (not real life) and food court and bathroom hand washing stations idk. mrs cowing was there idk she was like mom or idek we were like related like family? too vague but she was showing me (not really reality me t all or even a  physical being) pictures of her kids and in one i said ill try to find jackie (her daughter) and quickly pointed to a girl who looked like jackie and she said close but it was the girl to the left of her with a really orange tan.. eeetcccc.. so much holy craaappp so so much i cant even!!! nights and days of stuff.... some weird thing where i was trying to rescue animals through a cat door type thing i left open like a group of baby pandas wandered in then i opened another door in this tunnel thing leading up a staircase with this big room secret upsaairs thing where they lived until idk ?? we put the back in their natural enviromnent bc they were being poached or somethign what?? next door afar the whole time was mrs cowing in this weird train type really narrow trailer house wtff. it wasnt a neighborhood or anything kinda in the middle of nowhere field world wtf! there wre lambs, etc idk. and somewhere in the mix was karen alternate reality version she was like really naughty like promiscuous always with boys idk she was like sanding v oice messages to them like “come on bad boy” someting about bl****** it was weird idk what else happened with that. something with a bed then it cut away to a new segment of the dream... jumping around. i was trying to sneak on mrs cowing’s train for this one photo in her refrigerator? what? idek what it was  some old photo like from the 90s maybe of something or someone? idk!!! then there was this whole thing with me and nori and like a field trip or something in this old school place or train or plane kinda with bunkbeds and idek!! it was in the middle of nowhere what.  so i wanted a top bunk but this jellyfish thing wtf took my spot and nori was also on a top bunk and i was like thats so unfair i never get a top bunkbed and that jellyfish doesn’t even need a top bunk, it doesn’t even have a mind! so we moved the jellyfish and it was like 3 dead washed up jellyfish on the floor wtf…. next scene a school burning down on fire someone said “areas 1,2,3,7,8, are destroyed” or something like that. a whole thing involving that occurred…. like a pretty long / huge part of the dream but i forgot. more more omgg damnig!! i feel like I’m forgetting a huge huge segment… oh yeah the thing with the secret doors… well idont even but somehow it was then later like the incredibles family but mrs cowings family but also a made up family and they had to hide their kids which was kind of pilar,= & teagan, but NOT. they had to hide them in the upstairs dome hidden world i mentioned before with the pandas. for years. but they didn’t age. this part of the dream was huge i can’t even describe holy shyot!!  so so much. aunt becky was there like a maid for us and other people idk! taking care and stuff and the kids or whatever they were were being really loud like laughing and playing crazily one day or early on and a neighbor guy bc it was somewhat like an apartment got concerned and ventured up the stairs secret and i told aunt becky quickly and she had protocol like she’d pretend it was like a castle (that makes sense. totally.) but i left and later i came back and the guy was actually there bc he and becky had talked over a dating app and was there to meet . so then they were in love lmao…. so much more holy crap!!! dad was there something in this place with a huge circus ring thing idek like a competition like some game show with random people from the audience getting picked but it was insaaanee and our aunt stacy (but her name was willy or wilbur in the story) kept getting picked and winning so much money. later cut to a scene of her house alternate reality x 10000 with  weird rooms, puzzles, a garage thing where mom said she got rid of most o her bikes she used to have like 100 but then it was reduced to a toy box full wtf. i picked up my old light blue bike from 2012 ew and tried to ride it (irl we only have 4 bikes and i need a bike to go riding with the family) but when i tried to brake the handle break was broken so i couldn’t use that bike. mom said some bikes don’t have that? wtf. anyway so so much more i cannot even holy crapp!!!!!! so overwhelming. i missed a crapton but onto the “next” segment. some family reunion thing in this specific backyard wilderness forest woods setting that mustve been in an oooold dream or somehow fabricated based on fragments of childhood memories. like a family get together with lawn chairs, campfire, etc. logs lying around. while this was happening in my brain in the dream i was like so overcome bc i remembered this place from childhood. now that I’m awake i know i made that up. this wasn’t in rea life but it sure as heck felt like it!! so here we go. it was current day but it was weird everything felt like 2006-2009 idk! mason was younger, so were pilar and teagan. i took pilar’s pink ds because i had no cameraa w/ me and desperately wanted to photograph what i was seeing! but it took forever to take pictures it was so frustrating. like it kept lagging and stalling so it hooklike 30 seconds to take one picture & wanted to hurry because i felt like a time bomb was ticking and it all would vanish soon…. so we ventured along. i took pics of the pile of logs which was exactly how i “remembered it” from my real memories, the layout of the family sitting around in groups, the fields, the trees leading to the woods nearby.. when i was it. this specific stream arrangement to a secret secured place with a tree with a split kinda knot in it opened up like a pocket… we went closer , it was scary bc i didn’t want to drop the ds in the stream…. and i looked inside the wide knot of the tree and saw old messages, blue egg shells, white rocks. that we (my sisters, me and our cousins) left there last time we had gone there. i was so overcome with emotions like it was amazing like a lost part of my past (but this did not happen irl although it sure damn felt like it did!) the white rocks had our initials carved on it.  “T.H. 2010” was the main one i kept seeing. and there were crumpled up pieces of paper with messages that were kinda washed away (the inked/penciled words) . there was this asian type girl with us too but idk who she was. but she discovered more stuff but i was like slow down  i need to get pictures of this stuff first and preserve it!!!!! it was crazy i thought it was going to slip away  before my eyes and disappear, i was kinda panicking. she had found more secret stuff we left behind. teagan found a littlest pet shop benny thing with some initials written on its foot in the tree. the girl found a magazine of our dad posting in the front cover for some local gymnastics halloween party thing idk. then we went inside this secret passage near the secluded area (but we never ended up going in there. it was like a little mini pond that the stream led to , dark in the shade of trees with weeping willows and stuff— like the surskit area in poke park wii idk) — and it was kinda scary in the secret hole idk not really but it was  an old 2000s box t.v. playing dad’s tapes of gymnastics stuff and then stuffed with straw scarecrow type things sitting around it like a halloween props. they were in the pose of the picture on the cover, one of the dummies was supposed to resemble dad. there was a pumpkin on top of the tv. then it jumped around a bit idk  and my camera/ds died i guess. so i rwanted to run back home . to get a real camera. mason and pilar came with me and we had to run dow a super steep hill like the one in town by hermann… mason had his bike, i was running so fast my feet couldn’t stop and i reach out my right hand and grabbed a pole and swung around it as mason massed under my arm, ducking. it was funny, perfect timing. then this whole segment of the dream pretty much abruptly ended. and now we’re at the last segment. i pretty much forgot it at this point. something really weird and not as memorable so I’m not really complaining. but it is annoying to forget. some weird prank type thing where this girl and this weird guy who was serving food hit it off and got married instantly. it was weird idk it was supposed to be like a funny prank thing but too vague to remember now. ufgh.it was weird idk what else happened with that. something with a bed then it cut away to a new segment of the dream... jumping around.

^^^ This.

[stim-urself]

im just really depressed pls dont read this

yooo so i fricken idek 

im like on my computer because i wanna set up  a nice queue so i can keep my blog like consistant so yall can see pretty things idek i feel dumb for that??? idek but i get on here and i keep trying but my focus and brain hurts and i look at the screen for no more than twenty seonds before getting distracted by something else and it sucks because by the time i look back at the computer, anything that i WAS interested in has already like slipped my mind and idek what im looking at anymore!!!! aNd plus its like my head is killing me maybe because my wisdom teeth are comin in???? idk!!! idk anything right now lol!!! I have brain fog i hate it i hateit and like 

i jssst did it again ohmygod i literally just looked away for like five minutes and loko back and realise that  i was writing trhis post???!? jesus christ????>! im like so over it all lol! like forreal im hurting so bad and i knEW That i wouldn’t be able to do much at all today so i was wanting to set up the queue and then do my BEST to take a shower , i was gonna eat but reemembered we are out of food. honestly i odn’t even know what to do at this point i can bare;y even function anymore and i can’t make any sort of money adn the job i did have online isn’t somethign i can do anymore because my body ust KEEPS fighting me and i hate it i wish i could just like do some crazy deed and get a new one or sell my fucking soul idek tbh like i just dont know what to do. im so worried and scared all the time and one of the few fun things i have left in life is the internet (certain parts of it obviously lol) and like this blog helps me a ton and i can’t even enjoy it really either and i just wanna so bad i just wanna be chill and be oka and not hurt so bad ican barely hadnle it. like its so stupid why is this? a thing? and on the outside im like chill af and almost 90% of the time,unless you are conner or shaina, you have no idea that im hurting so bad i could break down at any moment!!! its rlly dumb!!iii alWAYS do my best to be a happy person (which never really works but im good at coming off positive, which is all that matters yanno) and i always do everything i can to be a good friend and not make people worry about me more than they already do !!1 and lately ive been so scared to ask for help at all because honestly im so tired of my whole life being a charity case but like forreal i hae no idea what tod o at this point and its so fucking scary . my mental and physical health is so shit at this point and like????a efw weeks ago i went to the store and the lady checking out my groceries yanno being a good worker or whatever and she was like ‘how are yall doing today :)” and i was like im good!!! and then like i started to tear up???? infront of the random worker lady??? i felt so bad and i tried to not let her notice because idek i dind’t want her to think maybe she did something wrong??? idek and conner was liek woah woah you okay?? why are you crying hunny its gonna be okay we are about to be leaving and i was like yeah no im fine! and he made me go on to the car and wait for him and mom . i felt so stupid. and i just wish i knew what to do with myself. i hate living in the hotel. i feel like, idek im so blessed and happy to even have a roof over my head, access to the internet, i have clothes to wear (most of the time), i have access to water, ellectricity, a shower and shampoo, ect, so i feel like a total shit person for even complaing, so i never really do but like this is my post and i highly doubt anyone at all has read this far lol so oh well!!! like

this hotel room is sos small and im stuck living with my ex and i am still so desperately inlove with him and honestly our relationship is so unhealthy for me but honestly i have no where else to go and if i got down to it, even if i got out, id probaly want him to come with me lol but honestly though like atleast it wouldn’t be here in this ne room with our one bed where WE sleep and our mini fridge and the one tv with his xbox and his food and his things and his stuff that im literally just a bum yall.

and i don’t even have a way to fix it and like last time i went to stay with my mom (which isint’ even an option anymore because she just moved in with my aunt,) i was without help for the first time inn a while and my body honestly can’t take shit anymore and i woke up and as usual i couldn’t fucking walk and i had to peee and i was crying like the second my eyes opened lol because im a lil bitch honestly and it hurt so bad and i did my best to try to stannd up but the matress was on the floor and i couldnt get up and i ended up fzallling and when i fell i fucking pissed myself. l;ike forreal. a 20 yr old pissing herslef. i was so fucking mortified and i couldnt really move and it was so embarrasing and no one weas there to see it thank god but i was stuck there for a good ten minutes. l;o,l1!! wowowow how awesome!!! andyanno its so ssscary because i know the issues i have like, dont get better. like they don;.t thats just not how it works. infact they ten to get worse for msot people, so im like stuck, and its so scary to know that someday , if i make it, imma be a 30 yr old, unable to walk, lonely and probably dying from the weight on top of her heart because she got so fat nothin could fit it! and in so much pain that she can’t even wipe her own ass!! lol! wow yanno honestly thix post makes me seem insane. but fuck that like hoenstly. honestlly i don’t have a single soul to tell anything to anymore. i feel so trapped, and scared and worried and i am crying and stresssed and honestly fuck it if me writing a thousand miles a minute helps me feel better, so be it like im not ebeven gonna worry .i just rreally wish i knew what to do to make things right. 

ok imma go now . if you read all of this, im so sorry , but thankyou for taking your time to care about me.