#delusion haver.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Possibly if i am this often "at my limit" it is not in fact a limit at all and i need to come up with a new word for it.
#it *is* a state i find intolerable and will begin acting in unusual and destructive ways (both self and outwardly! love it!) to get away#from though. so maybe not#honestly i might just be tired and dehydrated but it's also probably because i was without my fucking hormones for like a month and i always#seem to turn temporarily incapable of tolerating even the most minor distrsss#when it's been more than two weeks off#at least i'm not convinced everyone around me is conspiring against me right now. last time i missed my hormones for too long i convinced#myself my dad was working against me and i had to kill him or leave forever and my friend had to be like red. that is crazy people talk. fo#you fucking hear yourself. before I was even like hmmmm this seems out of character for my dad and kind of paranoid of me. known paranoid#delusion haver.#at the moment i just really badly want to try like acid or something just to see what'll happen. nothing good but that's still a success#state for me#you can ask about this if you want but bear in mind that if you say something really stupid i am in fact going to say you're being stupid
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
sorry this is such a funny tweet to me . Do they know.
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
had a lovely dream last night where i miscarried [redacted]’s baby. Ok
#and it came about like the possession subway scene?#why can i never have a nice dream about him#erotomania havers when the fixture of their delusion haunts them for years on end to no resolve and have weird traumatic dreams like this#or just know things about said fixture’s life without even knowing: :O#i wish i had the erotomania where it was sunshine and rainbows#in the jungian sense i was too depressed and cynical about love and men in general so maybe my subconscious had an influence#I HATE MY LIFE
0 notes
Text
where's the video of the maya the psychic intro where they're like it's so much more common than you think. i mean they burned joan of arc for it but.
0 notes
Text
i know where to look — kuroo tetsurō ˎˊ˗
⋆ ˚。⋆ ✴︎ to be loved is to be known. ⋆⋆⋆
— on kuroo’s 2am walk home from a late night study session, yn and their skateboard crash right into his head heart.
status: in progress!
content: university au, meet-hurt LMFAOOO, slowburn, toothrotting fluff, some angst, gn skater! yn with they/them prns, whipped lovesick dork! kuroo, ooc writing sorry, ignore time stamps, this fic is self indulgent
warnings: language, bad grammar, injuries from skating, ooc writing sorry, weed + cigs + alc, self sabotage, descriptions of social anxiety, overthinking, usage of kms and kys, trust issues, yn's parents divorcing is mentioned, yn is so avoidant and in denial im sorry
tags are added as story progresses, please check individual chapters for cw.
disclaimer lol i’m not a fan of tv girl at all sorry but just hearing the “you know where to find me and i know where to look” snippet is so soft and sweet to me cuz to be loved is to be known (ty twitter) so here i am w this kuroo smau 🗣️
( 𖦹 ) denotes written content!
the cast: skater cat fan club + stupid bitch syndrome havers
table of contents:
1 ⊹ call an ambulance! ( 𖦹 )
2 ⊹ build something up
3 ⊹ literally everywhere…
4 ⊹ a cat named ube ( 𖦹 )
5 ⊹ helmet hair
6 ⊹ clocked
7 ⊹ tech deck master
8 ⊹ shadow the hedgehog
9 ⊹ happy community day! ( 𖦹 )
10 ⊹ exposure therapy + delusion
11 ⊹ a hundred not-dates ( 𖦹 )
12 ⊹ who wont slime
13 ⊹ on the kitchen floor ( 𖦹 )
14 ⊹ (it was tails)
15 ⊹ so in hindsight
16 ⊹ under familiar lights ( 𖦹 )
17 ⊹ tba
taglist: closed! (50/50)
extra: moodboard | everyone’s decks | yn style guide
#hq smau#haikyuu smau#hq x reader#haikyuu x reader#kuroo x reader#kuroo tetsurou#kuroo tetsuro#kuroo tetsurou x reader#kuroo smau#kuroo tetsurou smau#kuroo tetsuro smau#haikyuu#hq#haikyuu!!#hq!!#haikyuu!! x reader#kuroo tetsurō smau#kuroo tetsurō x reader#kuroo tetsuro x reader#kuroo testuro#hq!! x reader
539 notes
·
View notes
Text
*average self-proclaimed safe space tumblr blog voice* I soooooo support people with schizophrenia that must be so hard to you anyway I just saw some weird looking woman talking to herself right outside my house im fearing for my life should I call the cops. Yeah dude I support all the adhd havers in the chat just try to pay attention when I talk to you it's not that hard it's like the least you could do to show some regard for the other human being in front of you. Like it's fine to have memory problems but why did you forget this one thing in particular that was important to me do you like not care or anything you should try harder. I am one of the only real mental health advocates to still exist in this world I hear your struggles that being said I hope I never get to meet one of those irl sociopaths or people with aspd whatever they call them now they're so freaky and they can blend into society so well you might never know if you're actually face to face with an actual socio i mean person with aspd in the store absolutely one of my biggest fears what if they torture me in their basement. I absolutely empathize with all the people in here suffering from delusions as long as they like, don't actually show it or have one concerning me that'd be highkey uncomfy leave me out of this dude im not talking to you until you get help, anyway my fav character from my anime just presumably died but i still think they actually survived im sooo delulu lol. We should push for more wheelchair accessibility in our cities I agree but like it's so difficult to tell how many people are actually disabled and who are actually faking it, like, ummm why did that "wheelchair" "user" guy stand up just now cover blown lmaoo…. Yeah I support people with facial differences but I still have a right to be disgusted you can't control my emotions anyway can you tag your selfies as #body horror this deeply triggering to me. Speaking of triggering can you also pleaseee hide your scars or at least warn us beforehand jesus do you know how many people genuinely do not want to see it. Here is my extremely fast strobing lights and flashing gifset #epilepsy. Yeah I loveee girls with bpd beautiful princess disorder am i right they're so interesting the stigma sucksssss i'd love to get to be one's favourite person as long as they don't actually have any of those weird or violent symptoms or don't go into any of their "episodes" near me like that's a bit dramatic….. I deeply feel for those who had underwent narcissistic abuse from the hands of an npd I think my shitty ex boyfriend was a narcissist too tbh #surviving narcissism here are 10 signs you are dealing with a narcissist and here's a tutorial on how to trigger a narc crash to epically own them anyway does anyone else think we should start enforcing mandatory castration of all the newly diagnosed narcs like you know what happens when they reproduce right. But I am willing to support them as long as they go to therapy to get that fixed it's just you know. Anyway sometimes hospitalisation is fine if they're genuinely a danger to themselves like what do you want them to go live on the streets or actually get help?? I support all the people dealing with being a professionally diagnosed disordered system and I think it's sooooo terrible how literally 99% of the youth population nowadays is purposefully faking it for attention I did my research (1 minute google search, 2 minute r/fakedisordercringe scrolling session and consulting a single system that agrees with me). It's just not believable to me that there's really that many people with it isn't it supposed to be rare… Also are we really sure all those alleged people in their heads are really real or just their imagination maybe all of them are actually faking it huh food for thought. I am very uncomfortable with nonverbal high support needs ppl actually having sex like consent is supposed to be explicitly verbal only and, are we really sure they can even consent arent they like basically children. You can't call me ableist I'm literally autistic
#mine#actually autistic#actually npd#actually plural#ableism#sanism#npd stigma#bpd stigma#pluralmisia#<- gonna add on to these later i am. bad at tagging warnings#i needed this off my chest like. can these people stop#dont know how comprehensible this is im bad at articulating myself#long post
317 notes
·
View notes
Note
I wonder what you think of if think they ever saw themselves together as (secret) gay couple, like marrige,boyfriends or was it more like "we are friends and song writing partners" that happend to do more "drunk things together" and that's what messed it up in the end, or do you think it was a pulling-pushing type of relationship? like did they break it up more than one time, all the time and the final drop was India?
Sorry for bad English!
John and Paul have a few things going for them and against them with regards to their perception of their relationship:
Pretty much any sexual activity between men was permitted without it being "gay" or "queer" or anything like that so long as the men involved didn't admit that they were gay. I guess kissing and penetration is what makes sex acts gay or queer to the early 20th century guy who was jerking off with his mate in the back of a car or whatever. Since this was just "getting off" and it was kept far away from their wives and families, it didn't count as gay. This means John and Paul grew up at a time where it wasn't considered particularly bad to get off with your mate, do frotting and handjobs/blowjobs, whatever. It definitely wasn't something that you talked about openly (that's indecent) but it didn't make you a gay guy either. Even now in TYOOL 2024 men are weird about this and insist that getting aroused and climaxing with other men is not sexual at all and definitely not gay. That means that John and Paul had a large, large gamut to run without ever having to call themselves gay. My opinion is that they did not call themselves gay or queer, or acknowledge that side of themselves for the beginning stages of their friendship. I think Paul has always had some inkling or self knowledge but honestly, from 15-18 years old that doesn't mean much lmao. I don't think John figured himself out for a longer period of time because he already had so much stress heaped on his plate, there was no need for him to add concerns about his sexuality onto them. If John and Paul were doing anything "extra" in addition to the group wanks at this early stage then they just tossed it all under the "boys will be boys" column. And if everything stayed that way then nothing else would have happened.
Then they go to Hamburg. It's a brand new continent and a brand new world. This is where they see crazy ass sex stuff and more importantly, they encounter men and women who don't wrap delusions around their sexual activity. This is where they met gay men, lesbians, transgender people, cross dressers, etc. We can't know what it was really like but the point is that Hamburg was a huge turning point for them and it turned John and Paul from simple provincials into much more sophisticated sex havers. John got off with crossdressers and kissed other men on the mouth; Paul found a boytoy and comforted himself with his presence when John-and-Stu became too difficult to bear. I doubt they considered themselves gay at this stage but their minds were broadened in a big way. They were exposed to different lifestyles and mindsets. And they had to learn fast and get used to it because their livelihoods depended on that.
After this, things become more slippery slidey. They could very well have gone on this way forever, doing gay sex stuff and refusing to call themselves gay. Except then Paris happened and neither of them forgot it. It never left their heads. Something happened there that we don't know about that, memories that they cherish. Who did John give a pearl necklace to considering there's no mention of him and Paul hooking up with ladies on this trip? Why did John hold on to the memory of couples tenderly kissing each other for so long? Why did John and Paul come back exploding with life and energy? It's almost as if something happened where they convinced each other that they were a sure thing, that they could depend on the other one no matter what. That there was something else for them that wasn't just being mates or being part of a band. And the rest, as they say, is history.
They didn't understand what they were to each other for a long time but that's because they were teenagers. It was a genuine friendship that they built in the beginning which honestly? I'm really glad that they had that. I also think that it's exactly this which lead to their relationship lasting for so long.
Like, John's problem was that he jumped into relationships and intimacy too quickly and it inevitably blew up in his face somehow. Paul's problem is that he's too cautious and he holds everyone at arms length. But by having a concrete friendship to build off of that they grew over time and through ups and downs, they ended up becoming each other's steady. It gave them stability and a deeper relationship that they never really managed with other people. That means that, for a long time, John and Paul would call themselves "mates" and it would be completely accurate. It wasn't until much later that the sex stuff started and then when it did, they still had the strength of that initial friendship to rely on.
When it comes to the "push/pull" dynamic you mentioned, they did have their ups and downs where they got used to "crisis moments" to pull them back together after being emotionally distant from each other (and I do have thoughts about that). But I don't think they went through a series of break ups and "we're back together" moments. I think that their relationship simply strained and strained and strained until it finally snapped under the weight of everything they couldn't bring themselves to say. I don't think they suffered any serious moments of breaking up once they put 1960 Hamburg behind them.
There are lots of people who think that John and Paul never figured out their mutual attraction due to their upbringing and while this is a possibility I do not think this is true at all. John Lennon and Paul McCartney are the most revolutionary minds of the 20th century, I don't believe for a second that they were just sitting there and didn't understand what was happening to them. I absolutely think that they figured out that they were queer and in love with each other. Maybe it was in 1961, maybe it was in 1967, but they did eventually figure it out.
The problem for John and Paul is that this revelation did not make their lives better and freer. It arguably made their lives much worse. I don't know if they could even consider the possibility of being together in some capacity because of the sheer virulence against homosexuality in the 1960s and that they were both raised to think that it was moral depravity. We can see that this provided roadblocks for both of them: John and Paul had to get wasted in Key West to simply say the words "I love you."
On the third hand, they did have examples of homosexual men like Victor Spinetti, who was apparently in a committed relationship with another man, to look at. Once they got to know Brian, they were introduced to the world of gay men, not all of whom were married to women. This once again broadened their minds and they had the revelation that you could just go off with another man and be his steady.
John and Paul would probably have liked it very much if they could be a couple together with their version of fidelity in the works. I doubt they would have made a legal commitment to each other in the form of marriage (their business relationship was certainly much closer than trivial marriage documents) but they would have liked being romantic partners. The roadblocks to this were 1) John's son Julian 2) their status as public figures 3) their upbringing telling them that this was wrong.
I have no doubt that John revealed something to Paul in India, more than his 🎤. As one of those revolutionary minds of the 20th century, John may have offered something similar to the above paragraph to Paul, hoping that if he presented it all of a piece then Paul would have to answer sincerely, from the heart. After all, John could be sure that Paul loved him, right?
Well. We know what happened after that.
#mclennon#john lennon#paul mccartney#took me years to answer this i'm sorry#don't worry about your english#i understood everything#talktalktalk
55 notes
·
View notes
Note
Im not done with this actually. Me? You say this to me? The #1 girlzuku & butchugo delusion haver? You don't even know the worlds I have created in my head about them. Im silent about 'em mostly because I dgaf That Much but hooly shit dude. Those two could have been the two most attractive women in the world and I would still not ship them. Never in a million billion years. Bakugo gets gender envy from Rodrick Heffley and you KNOW this you know this in your soul.
#8 on violence game !!
Bakugo and Izuku are LITERALLY siblings okay. Their siblings coded. No- no, I dont wanna fucking hear it, I may not have read the series in a couple years but I can RECOGNIZE some Rodrick Heffly ass behavior from a mile away, okay ? I can see it I can sense it I can smell it. Sorce? Only a butch older sibling would wear a skull shirt like Katsuki does. Thank you, and thank you for coming to my ted talk.
13 notes
·
View notes
Note
hello, i dont know what a wormy is, so incredibly sorry if its code for dont use this or something, /gen
i wanted to say this on here since im incredibly shy on discord and barely have access to it much, Your emotes, staff, and whole community you’ve built has genuinely got to be one of the most mentally relaxing things ive ever discovered. Although im very new to the server, and i mostly lurk, within a good 5 minutes something someone says makes me chuckle. Its so fun and nice to talk there, and i dont ever feel judged. the happiness i felt when i saw NPD,BPD, CLUSTERB, n other stuff being highlighted and shown as emojis or just talked about in a non dehumanizing way shocked me? I have no real access to people due to my disabilities and lack of being able to leave my home, so i spent alot of my time hopping through syscord servers, and this is the first one ive actually ever felt represented in. I dont think ive ever actually met other intersex people but i do see them talk in the disability-folks and hearing people speak about things i can actually relate to and agree with makes my heart jump. I remember a staff of yours telling me smth along the lines of “fuck them” in regards of me telling them about my experience with people who treat me like they have to walk on eggshells around me just because i have NPD, and it genuinely gave me the confidence i needed to not be so ashamed of my disorder, hence then I’ve actually found myself enjoying researching about my disorders and others i might have misconceptions about.
Thank you K9 for giving us emojis and emotes
Thank you staff for looking out for us and aid in making the server a safeplace
and shout out to all my NPD havers, were awesome 🫶🫶
Sincerely, Vixen
Hi op this made me cry We strive to be a safe place for people like us, disordered, delusion-experiencing, dissociative, everything white mom Facebook usually hates HAHA Your kindness is so refreshing to see from the normal Tumblr drama and I hope you know we appreciate our community as much as you do. Our server is the only discord server we really talk in honestly, so many of our members are so sweet and understanding, it's a lovely place to be (not to toot my own horn) Thank you for being a part of my community :) People like you are who we made it for <3 Be safe !!! If anyone wants to join, link is here
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
“dululu” being considered for word of the year should give me and other actual delusion havers a legal right to kill someone i think
#‘hehe im so delulu’ ok well i had to go to the hospital once because i thought I was actually going to be killed by a shadow on the wall#👍
18 notes
·
View notes
Note
If you include penis havers in your lesbianism you don't deserve to call yourself a butch lol no amount of delusion will make a male a lesbian. You are a insult to actual lesbians (female homosexuals)
Dear anonymous transphobe,
Your note has been sitting in my inbox for a while, I’ve been trying to find something snarky, or clever to reply. But what I’ve really wanted to say is that we cannot separate gender transgression from lesbian lives/bodies/experiences. And that there will always be parallels between Butch folk’s experiences and those of trans women and transfems. We know the looks in the bathrooms, the multiplying and ever changing reasons we aren’t “real women”, and the historical and contemporary expulsion from womanhood and lesbianism. While I will never fully be able to grasp the weight of living as a trans woman in this world, I do believe that my experiences as a butch have allowed me to grow in my understanding of transmisogyny in some ways. If you’re going to say I’m an insult to “actual” Lesbians, please leave my transfem siblings, friends, and lovers out of it. I promise I’m genderfucked enough to sustain your need for identity policing.
#butch lesbian#lesbian#butch#dykes for trans rights#gender fucked#tw transmysoginy#tw transphobia#transmisogny tw#transphobia tw
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
creepypasta headcanons (from a slasher blog? more likely than you think)
I know you all didn’t follow me for Creepypasta content but I didn’t want to make a new account, and I need to get some head canons across. also I picked the tumblerest aesthetic image i could find for each one to really channel that energy.
trying to get a feel for them, be easy plz. I haven’t written for them in years.
Based on the fandom perceptions of the creepypastas rather than real lore.
TW: SUBSTANCE ABUSE/ SA/ ED/ SH JEFF THE KILLER
-Mega Mall Goth ass beat. Listens compulsively to Marilyn Manson. Had a third wave sexuality experience when KILL4ME was released. -Addicted to Heroin because he thinks it makes him sexier. Has extreme delusions of grandeur. Believes he’s a new age god that is meant to be worshipped- Essentially believes he’s some form of reincarnated Aphrodite. In actuality its more like the modern day Narcissus, or Dorian Gray, suffering constantly with a news cast image of himself that he just sees getting uglier and uglier -”They never get my fucking smile right. I swear they’re editing it- They’re like, fucking editing it-” -Severe Body Dysmorphia. He can’t perceive his body. He can barely perceive his face when he’s in the process of healing. It’s all lacquer to him- Iridescent. He doesn't view this as a bad thing, but on the rare occasion he can perceive his body, he’s disgusted, and mutilates it in an attempt to repurpose what he views as simply “an unfavorable medium” -Very into body mods. He views his smile this way- further perfecting a craft. He has piercings and the ink and the works- Most shops don't blind twice about his appearance, often applauding the look. -Contrary to his living legend, Jeff was neve able to fully burn off his lids. He tried, and just ended up nuking his lashes. He does find that lack of hair to be appealing, though, and often keeps the rest of his body, save for his head, in a similar shape. A lot of it struggles to grow hair because of the scar tissue anyways. -Never got the chance to grow out of his edgy, 14, and deep phase. Curses compulsively. With every breathe the word Fuck, Bastard, Cunt, Bitch, or some other new fun word will come spilling out. -Chronically straight. like, obsessively straight. Very into the most typical looking women because ‘metal is a mans topic’ (he literally only knows 4 Metallica songs) and if he very much has that ‘they’re too easy to manipulate’ -He’s always chronically chasing women he can’t have.
EYELESS JACK
-Daddy Kink Haver. Proper dominant, educated man. -I think he’d be older. Not Hannibal. This isn't about Hannibal. Jack is more breakable, pliable. He’s demanding and domineering, and he sneers and snaps his teeth like a dog. He bites in bed. He pulls hair. He’s borderline animalistic when he consumes, and yet surgical and steel when he slices. -He doesn’t prepare meals. He eats it raw. He’d find the flavor- the specialty of the meat to be tainted by spices and herbs. He just needs the meat. -Complex form of OCD. He doesn't need to be clean. He’s not really put together. He’s got a five o’clock shadow, a hoodie that smells like copper, and a bizarre itch in his own kidneys. If he doesn’t remove someone's, he’ll be forced to remove his own- And he only has the left one left. -Tall. Not wide. Lean. He’s got a cock that drags across the ground. Uncircumcised. And he walks with the tilt to prove it. -And he sweats, and groans, and there’s this sense about him that he’s only living off adrenaline and coke. -A severe sadist. The kidney eating has little to nothing to do with this. Those are urges in his organs. The choice to get a medical PHD has everything to do with this, though. Watching people writhing on gurneys when they come in for emergency? Gorgeous. Erection driving. -Also, has a PHD. It’s DOCTOR Eyeless Jack to you. -Goes by Eyeless Jack purely due to a newspaper misprint and a well placed note. He committed an act of enucleation, and instead of the multiple missing kidneys from previous LIVING victims, he’s only known for this? Humans are so weirddddd.
TICCI TOBY
-A lot quieter than he’s made out to be, only really mumbling out things here and there- however, notably, when he’s loud hes l o u d. -The better descriptor of how he behaves would be self harmingly neurotic. Sometimes other harmingly neurotic. Charmingly, neurotic. His neurosis has very little to do with his tourettes. It has everything to do with his mania. He’s always on an upper, and the way he moves proves it. He’s borderline animalistic with his motions. He doesnt walk anywhere, he either bolts or stomps. He finds urges to burn things a little too frequently- -If you both to get close enough without his mask on, you’ll see that he’s actually mumbling--- all the time. It’s almost like a consistent chitter of his teeth. Like a weird, fucked up rattle. -One of his main tics is pulling his jaw scar. It’s a hook motion, and he yanks down and it leaves the area constantly raw. He would prefer to not speak, but then again, he isn’t really given the option. -He tweets like a bird. “WooHoo~” -A consistent problem with his schizo-affective ass is that he’s subjective to equally grandiose delusions when having episodes. Like Jeff, he often finds himself gagging on the kitchen floor, struggling to cope with the fact that he’s disgustingly mortal. Like, Jeff is- bad- Toby’s consciously bad. It’s like the second he became aware of Slenderman being-- real- any form of humanity drained from him. It’s not like he had a disorder to blame it on anymore. A real dude was just-- making him act like this. It wasn’t in his head, what was he to do against an eldritch horror? -lays... incredible pipe. Insane levels of pipe. He’s hypersexual with the audacity to have a thing for anal. He’s awful. awful. He can go for hours- -But its not like he feels anything. He struggles to feel anything emotionally to begin with- and physically, literally. -The act of sex is bizarrely calming to him. Rhythmic. It’s like a hypnotic form of self care for him. He can zone out for hours- It’s not like he becomes aware when he’s rubbed his dick raw- or your internal organs.
#creepypasta x you#creepypasta x reader#jeff the killer x reader#jeff the killer x you#eyeless jack x reader#eyeless jack x you#ticci toby x reader#ticci toby x you#creepypasta smut
397 notes
·
View notes
Text
Under the Mistletoe (this definitely happened, I was there)
After turning out the final lamp in the Hall, the Captain journeyed back to meet Havers in the kitchen. It seemed as though the Lieutenant was going to meet him in the foyer, which was how their bodies came to gently run into each other.
“Oh, sorry-” he muttered, hands flying to hold Havers’ shoulders as though it would soften their collision.
“Sorry-” Havers said simultaneously; his apology was mismatched by his light grasp on his CO’s buttoned chest. They swayed for a moment, both visually acknowledging the flora above them. “It seems we’ve taken in enough drinks for the whole unit.”
“Yes. Unfortunately. I’ve already indulged your curiosity too much and now we can barely walk about without causing trouble,” he said, perhaps stupidly, with a slur and a smirk. And then, losing the battle of another internal conundrum, he said something worse: lowly and misarticulated, “if you were a woman, I would have liked to kiss you right now.”
An immense pang of regret rang through his ribs as soon as he knew what he had said, which took a few seconds. In that time, Havers had stepped back to physically part them. Panic rose in the Captain. Had he been a maudlin, conceited fool and flown like Icarus? Had the ice-cold of reality been melted by his cosy, fiery fantasies of their relationship, or had that flame been extinguished in one fell misstep?
He prepared his lungs to ramble an apology, to excuse himself from Button House and Havers’ life forever, only to be stopped by the sarcastic smile and rolling eyes of his friend.
“You do intrigue me, sir. Often.” He smoothed out where his hands had held his Captain’s jacket. The CO felt it through the layers of fabric, reaching out to something deeper so that it would emerge. His heart fluttered, but it fluttered closed, unsure of the ambiguous nature of Havers’ expressions. “But you tease your true self just as frequently.”
“I’d prefer to keep it-keep it hidden.”
“As you wish. But do not blame me when I ask more of you.”
“I will not.” The Captain ducked his head and shook it, squinting at the ground as if to inspect the space between them. He then reached into the kitchen to extinguish the last light, distancing himself from the man that made him unguarded, more than the alcohol, more than the fatigue. “We should… Go. To, uh, our rooms.”
A flash of disappointment rippled across the Lieutenant’s expression, though the Captain could only dismiss it as a delusion or mistake on his part. Still, caught in the moment, locking eyes, he almost convinced himself to collide under the mistletoe again.
“Yes, sir. Goodnight.”
#their tension is off the charts#soft repressed middle aged war gays save me#mistletoe#writing#bbc ghosts#ao3#caphavers#captain#capvers#havers#christmas#tawgo#one shot#fanfic
28 notes
·
View notes
Note
ableist creators: not an ableist comment towards people with NPD specifically, but as a delusion-having girlie with NPD i feel like i just have to share this for my fellow delusion havers: the youtuber crescent shay (videos focus on making outfits and similar stuff) uses the word "delulu" :(
in her latest video ("i silk painted an entire dress") she states (in text) "a little delulu here, what do you mean "pretty good"??" in response to her expressing being proud of her test painting in the footage being shown. which uhhhhh... yeah. i don't want to cancel her or shit, but i don't trust anyone who uses the word "delulu" considering 90% of the time they're the same people who'll turn around to my delusions and call me insane for it. either way, it's fucking ableist to be involved in twisting the word delusion(al) like that considering it's really all we have
stop fucking stealing actual words used by people with mental health issues, cutey-fying them and removing all actual meaning from the term, and then leaving us with no actual words for our experiences than incredibly ableist ones holy shit these guys are all the fucking same
^
44 notes
·
View notes
Note
I was really happy with Inquisition having gay companions and I do attribute that in large part to having a gay lead writer (who wrote the first two games as well but as far as I understand was only allowed to go so far with gay rep at that time hence the lack of gay companions till Inquisition). Let's just say I was not surprised that now that the lead writer is pan and that the game director identifies as a trans woman, homosexual romances would be considered problematic.
Maybe it's for the best though, cause this time around you'll be able to pick pronouns and play as trans and non-binary and I really wouldn't have wanted to see a "lesbian" character be romanced by a penis haver.
I'd fucking rage. Inquisition is my fucking baby! Sera meant the world to me. She was this brash outspoken lesbian who sometimes pisses people off because she will not sugar coat, lie or play into anyone's delusions. I even enjoyed Dorian's storyline which was about his father wanting him to go through gay conversion of sorts and marry a woman. Gay selectively romanceable characters are actually revolutionary. I do remember going on youtube to see people mod over the games to romance sera as a man or dorian as a woman, and I was so pissed, it felt like a violation, I couldn't understand until I because wear of the modern homophobia. Wait Bioware games let you play as trans? Why is that even a feature? You can play as any sex you want! No one stops a man from playing a female oc. Why would you choose to be trans? You see, I'm different, I just played as male characters. I would never play as a woman pretending to be male. This was always a big difference with me when I identified as a trans, I wanted to be male, a real male, while these people were fine with being the imitation. Dick havers being considered lesbian is why I never played that cyberpunk game, I heard it was ass.
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Npd/Narcissus theme
[npd/narcissus theme]
including narcissus from greek myth as well as anything related to the narcissus flower and npd.
tagging @clusterrune, @narcissist-hoarding
(nick)names:
narc, narci, narcis/narciss, narcisse, narcissa/narcisa, narcisso/narciso, narcet/narcett/narcette, narcetta, narcetto, narcel/narcell/narcelle, narcella, narcello, narcin/narcine, narcina, narcino, narcissus, narcissi, narcissist, narcissisa, narca, narcisset/narcissett/narcissette, narcissetta, narcissetto, narcissel/narcissell/narcisselle, narcissella, narcissello, narcissin/narcissine, narcissina, narcissino, narcissisti, narcissista, NP, ND, nargis, narkissos, narciso, narcyz, narkas, nargiza, narges, narcaf, narcas, narce, narcel, narcie, narcia, narciz, narco, narzy mirror, mirra/miraa/mira, mirrora, mirrorer, Major reflect, reflector, reflecta, reflection, Royal daf/daff, daffy/daffi/daffie, daffo, daffodil jon/john, jonqui, jonquil po/poe, poet, poeti, poetic, poeticus, phea, phae, pheasant, pink, pinki/pinkie/pinky, pinks, pinkster, Prince, Princess, Princex, Prinze eye fin/finn, find, finder, findern lil, lili/lilli/lily/lilly/lillie/lilie, Liriope taz, taze, tazet/tazett/tazette, tazeta/tazetta, thespiae King Cephissus queen, queeny/queenie
surnames:
Narcisse, Narcissa, Narcissi/Narcisi, Narcissist, Narcett, Narcissisa, Narciso/Narcizo, Narci, Narca, Narcis, Narcy Myrror/Mirror, Mirrored Reflector/Reflecter Daffodil Jonquil Poet, Poeticus, Pheasant, Pink, Pinkster Eye(s) Find/Finde, Finder, Findern Lily, Liriope Tazetta Cephissus
1st p prns: i/me/my/mine/myself
ni/nar/narci/narcine/narcself ni/narc/narcs/narcself ni/nar/nargi/nargine/nargisself mi/mirr/mirro/mirrine/mirrorself ri/re/reflec/reflectine/reflectionself di/daff/daffi/daffine/daffodilself ji/jo/jon/jonquine/jonquilself pi/poe/poet/poetine/poetself phi/phea/pheas/pheasine/pheasantself pi/pink/pinks/pinkine/pinkself eye/ee/ey/eyine/eyeself fi/fe/find/fine/findself li/lil/lily/liline/lilyself ti/taz/tazets/tazine/tazettaself
2nd p prns: you/your/yours/yourself
no/narc/narcs/narcself no/nar/nargis/nargiself mo/mirror/mirrors/mirrorself ro/reflector/reflectors/reflectorself do/daffor/daffors/daffodilself jo/jonquir/jonquirs/jonquirself po/poeter/poeters/poeterself pho/pheasar/pheasars/pheasantself po/pinkster/pinksters/pinksterself eyo/eyer/eyers/eyerself fo/finder/finders/findernself lo/liler/lilers/lilyself to/tazer/tazers/tazerself
3rd p prns: they/them/theirs/themself
narc/narcs, np/npd, npd/npds, np/d, n/pd, narc/narcissist, narcissist/narcissists, narcissist/narcissistic, narci/ssist, narci/ssistic, narcissus/poeticus, nar/nargis, narg/nargis, nargi/nargis, nargis/nargis', narcissus/tazetta, narcissus/jonquil mir/mirror, mirr/or, mir/ror, mirror/mirrors, mirror/mirrored, mirror/mirroring reflect/reflects, reflect/reflection, reflect/reflector, reflect/reflected, reflect/reflecting, re/flect daff/daffodil, daffodil/daffodils, daffo/dil jon/quil, jon/jonquil, jonquil/jonquils po/et, poet/poets, poeti/cus, poet/poeticus, poeticus/poeticus, phea/sant, pheasant/pheasants, pheasant/eye, pink/ster, pink/pinkster, pink/pinks, pinkster/pinksters, pinkster/lily fi/findern, find/ern, finder/findern, findern/findernself, findern/flower lil/lily, lily/lilys, lil/y, li/ly taz/tazetta, taze/tazetta, tazetta/tazettas, taz/etta
titles:
the narc, the narcissist, the narcissistic, the one with npd, the npd haver, the one who adores themself/their reflection, the mirror gazer, the one who gazes into the mirror/their reflection, the self-admirer, the flower, the daffodil, the jonquil, the poet, the peots daffodil, the poets jonquil, the poets narcissus, the nargis, the pheasant, the pheasants eye, the findern, the findern(s) flower, the pinkster, the pinkster(s) lily, the lily, the tazetta, the narcissus tazetta, the narcissus jonquil, the (x) of Cephissus, the (x) of Liriope
(prn) who is narcissistic, (prn) who has npd, (prn) who has grandiose delusions/delusions of grandeur, (prn) who loves their reflection, (prn) who loves daffodils, (prn) who loves jonquils, (prn) who loves the nargis, (prn) who loves the pheasants eye, (prn) who loves the findern flower, (prn) who loves the pinkster lily, (prn) who was born to Cephissus, (prn) who was born to Liriope
#npd#npd theme#narcissistic personality disorder#actually narcissistic#narcissism#narcissus#greek myths#name blog#list of titles#list of names#names list#title list#1st person neopronouns#2nd person neopronouns#3rd person pronouns#neopronouns#pronouns#pronoun list#pronouns list#npd names#npd pronouns#npd neos#npd titles#narcissistic names#narcissistic titles#narcissistic pronouns
30 notes
·
View notes