#definition of ‘you’re telling me a queer coded this?’

[trash-king18]

miggy hc’s

sorry for the delay on pt. 9 my loves. i just moved and things are a little hectic but here’s some head cannons i had written for mig (sfw and nsfw) pt. 9 should be up tmr or wednesday<3

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i feel like he’d absolutely convince you to get your nails done and pay for it too just so you could play with his hair and rub his back with them because he’s literally a sucker for it. like he’d be embarrassed about it at first and deny it but he’d be purring at your touch.. like literally though bc he’s half spider 

hear me out: on the lowest of keys miguel is kinda autism coded. LISTEN listen listen… the agitation, the sensory issues from heightened senses, the rigidity, the strong sense of justice, the need for seeking patterns to make sense of things that have happened, a fucking genius, (has a literal fucking rage meltdown in the movie) and would absolutely end up with an adhd golden retriever energy gf (partner if ur queer bc duh) 

would definitely think bigotry in general is “unintelligent and barbaric” homophobia especially and would defend any and all spider kids from bigots (let’s face it they’re all at least bi) even though he’s a grump he’d protect them. 

his love language is acts of service and physical touch

he likes to stay busy, even though you coax him into relaxing more, physically maybe not so much since hes always fighting bad guys…(or fucking you) but mentally. he’s reading, or watching documentaries, playing chess (he definitely programmed an ai himself that would be near impossible to beat just for the challenge and like analyzed the worlds best players. and just because i think it’s cute, you definitely introduced him to like a childish animated puzzle game on your phone that he insisted was stupid but then you wake up to find he stole your phone to play it at night. definitely gets frustrated with it and you make fun of him “it’s harder than it looks ok” 

when miguel started acting softer towards you lyla would tease him about it every chance and try to embarrass him in front of you 

if you are latina and(or) have curly hair like me i can see him getting all pouty when you straighten it. he’d tell you, you look gorgeous of course “you always do” but i feel as a latino he would just think your natural hair is absolutely gorgeous (curly or coily) 

when he comes out with you, if he does, he just holds stuff and watches over you. he will never initiate pda but he certainly doesn’t mind if you cling to him in front of all the people watching. unless you’re at work “reputations” and all that 

he’s not a dancer(but he’s extremely good at it)… unless maybe you’re walking down a shadowed street where there aren’t many people and there’s latin music he might be tempted to pull you into him to dance a little salsa or just feel your hips move when no one’s looking 

dates are more quiet, private, and thoughtful settings. 

is 100 percent not a morning person. blackout curtains and no alarms and while he will stay up all night working or wake up at the ass crack of dawn for missions he will bitch and moan about everything when you try to wake him up when he doesn’t have work and he is a pouting sulking grump when you do 

food. this man is always fucking hungry. but he cooks his own food or doesn’t eat at all and is as much a control freak in the kitchen as he is at work. and it takes you forever to convince him to let you cook, even though you’re perfectly good at it and better at certain things. definitely loves making you taste things as he cooks even when he’s made it before 

every time you pass a “mexican” place unless it’s actually authentic he’ll mutter under his voice cursing them saying they’re ruining his culture (they are). just imagine him driving/swinging past a california tortilla and rolling his eyes and scoffing 

miguel’s nightmares wake him up in a cold sweat more often then he’d care to admit. and as a light sleeper you are almost always already up stroking his face and hair and on the rare occasion you aren’t he’ll just pull you on top of him to feel and watch you instinctively cuddle into him. 

when you’re home you are glued to his side. he’s the: keep you on the kitchen counter while he cooks, shower together, literally tangle your bodies together in bed or on the couch, type of man. but his time away on missions which is frequent, gave you some breathing room. because as much as he’d presumably be the distant one he’s got domestic instincts like no other. he gets enough action at work that he’s definitely a homebody once you coax him into overworking himself less.

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nsfw

2 word’s: cock. warming. any chance he gets to get himself inside you he takes, or he makes them. he is obsessed with the idea of making a permanent imprint of himself in your pussy and he 100 percent loves belly bulge. cuddling or working from home? you’re on his lap preferably in one of his shirts with his dick stuffed inside you. sleeping? probably ended up pulling your leg over his and (consensually!) slipping himself into your hole. one the rare occasion you sleep later than he does he’ll wake you up by lazily rutting into you. 

2 more words: panty ruin-er. and that’s all 

i don’t know exactly how to explain this one.. but he’s got a pretty dick. you can tell his hygiene is very good and he’s particular about everything and that goes for down there too.. but it’s just pretty. (idk if y’all know what i mean but sometimes you just see one and it just- idek the girls that get it, get it) 

he’s got an oral fixation and don’t tell me he doesn’t. mans a munch but he’s also perfectly satisfied to kiss, nip, lick, and suck at any other part of you. 

imo, he’s really not subby or even on the bottom he likes to be the one in control even the times where all he’s really doing is giving you everything you ask for. but dont assume that means he doesn’t absolutely love watching you ride him or give him head/hj. and when hes cranky he will sheepishly ask you for it almost like he’s embarrassed about being needy (he 100 percent is and you make fun of him for it all the time… after you fuck his soul out of course) 

he HATES being teased. give it but can’t take it. but the reason he doesn’t is because he will whimper a little and he would never hear the end of it. 

more than once he’s stopped you sucking his dick to pull you up purely to cum in you instead of your mouth (sorry bro man has a breeding kink i don’t know what to tell you) “wouldn’t want to waste that would we” 

the only thing that really truly makes him blush is when you grab/slap/poke his ass and you do it just for that reason and he will chase you around the house yelling at you(mostly playfully) after 

if you grind on him he’s usually pretty quick to try and just fuck you instead. because when you do you’ll start kissing his jaw and his neck just rubbing yourself on his bulge or his thigh and suddenly the thought and sight of you getting off just from that is enough to push back any thoughts of embarrassment at the sounds that leave his throat and he doesn’t like loosing control but he can’t help it with you 

i feel like if he found you touching yourself he would immediately worry it was because he wasn’t taking care of you well enough and ask what you wanted but you’d just laugh and tell him it was simply because you got wound up and impatient thinking about him. 

he can never finger you if he’s already wound up because.. claws 

as gentle and caring as he can be he still loves to overstimulate you. the aftercare is amazing but he will fuck as many orgasms out of you as he wants. sometimes he just can’t think straight until he gets to. 

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taglist:

@urmotherswhor3 @marcswife21 @l3laze @kirke-is-my-name @rexxesgirl @simp4miguell @urmomisafinewoman @dammittjanet

[mischieffoal]

Kugrash; Rat Jesus; Bruce Kugrich; you know him, you love him - is a repressed, closeted, gay man. In this essay I will… tell you why I think that, I actually wrote the essay. (It’s not an essay it’s a long text post, it doesn’t have an introduction or a conclusion or citations don’t come for me)

Anyway, I’ve just finished The Unsleeping City chapters 1 and 2 and Kugrash has infested my brain and wormed his slimy way around my heart. I don’t need to proselytise him, if you’re reading this post you already understand the appeal of a crusty, washed-up rat bastard of a terrible father who’s trying to make up for everything he’s ever done. What I particularly loved about him was that he is gay-coded in such a specific way that it makes the poor little meow meow of it all even worse. Was it on purpose? I doubt it. But it certainly is there. 

(I doubt it was on purpose because the joy of D20 is that all the characters are kind of just pan unless specified otherwise and homophobia is only a thing that villains do in the first five minutes of a character’s introduction. So it’s like, I doubt Murph did this on purpose because he’s probably just being very queer friendly and it comes across this way because of the Kugrash of it all)

Evidence that I remembered to write down is as follows: 

Perry the Pigeon

Kug doesn’t actually want to date Perry, but he doesn't object to going to the wedding with him/sort of leads him on/definitely flirts with him/tries to let him down nicely. 

Murph did just choose the name Perry at random. Could have been a girl pigeon, but no. 

Perry is serious about Kugrash. Like, “still mourning him” serious. 

Perry isn’t only into Kug, he is an established gay pigeon who later marries another man (/rabbit)

2. The Kugriches

When the other PCs tell Wally there’s a pigeon with a crush on his dad, Wally immediately asks “What’s his name?”

Wally and David’s mum is out of the picture. David said that Bruce abandoned them when Wally really needed him, which I think implies she’s been gone since before Kugrash was cursed. Why? Who knows, Bruce was a bastard in many ways - but if his sexuality was so obvious that their son can only imagine his dad dating a male pigeon, it was probably obvious to Bruce’s ex. 

3. Lowell Masters

Kingston: finds out Lowell can Identify things by sticking them up his ass Kingston, two seconds later, pointing at his good friend Kugrash: “This man, what is this man?" Lowell: gives Kugrash an ass jacket Kugrash: “Yeah, yeah, sure thanks, appreciate it.”  Kugrash: “I smell like lube now instead of trash.” Kugrash: “We’ll link up at some point”

4. The totems

All men. When the Intrepid Heroes came up with what their totem animals would be in an Adventuring Party, they weren’t particularly gendered, but weren’t sentient either, so who knows what that’s worth

Perry (see Point 1)

The campest unicorn you’ve ever seen or heard in your life

5. Best friends with a hairdresser

6. “You goddamn beautiful boy, you fucker, you absolute arsehole.” I get it, Kug. Ricky does it to us all. 

To me, all of this implies Kugrash is gay, but quietly. He’s certainly not out-and-proud like Pete is, but his children know. Did he tell them or was it obvious? I don’t think Kugrash knows. I think he’s closeted to no-one but himself. A business man in the 1980s isn’t the most likely guy to have searched his soul for any sexual deviancy, and since then he’s been very busy being depressed/ashamed/a literal rat in the sewers. Misty and Kingston do a lot of work to pull him out of the underground and actually talk to human beings again. They know he’s gay, from the things they say about him (see in particular Point 3: Lowell Masters). I don’t think Kugrash would have ever had a “gay awakening” or a “gay panic” if he’d stayed on the mortal plane, I doubt his sexuality would be that shocking or confusing - I just don’t think he’s noticed. 

Being cursed into a ratman gives you the space to learn all sorts of things about yourself, and if that doesn’t quite work, you can always eat an everything bagel and become omniscient, when you can finally realise that Bruce Kugrich was in fact gay the whole time.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk. 

[kaylorstree]

My 1989 (Taylor’s Version) From The Vault Tracks Analysis

This is my gaylor analysis of the bonus tracks- please be patient with me, these were only released recently!

The are the gayest from the vault tracks in my opinion. (Also the worst in my opinion, ironically. That’s why it took me so long to analyse them).

Slut!

Essentially the theme of the song ‘If they call me a Slut! it might just be worth it for once’ I think means she’ll gain a new beard (Calvin Harris/Tom Hiddleston/Joe Alywn) so society with scrutinise and slut shame her, but it is all worth it to be with Karlie.

‘Flamingo pink’ Flamingos are symbolic of lesbianism

‘Handprints in wet cement’

Hand to look for this but I remembered-

There was a lot of speculation about whether the ‘J 🩷 KK’ could have been changed from ‘TS KK’ due to the shape of the heart, and the fact Karlie visited it multiple times.

‘Sunrise Boulevard’ Karlie is called a ray of sunshine, but also when I looked up Sunrise Boulevard the map looks like ‘a crooked love in a straight line down.’

‘Aquamarine’ is Taylor’s birth stone, and a really queer coded film about a mermaid trying to live on land and learn about love. (Go watch Aquamarine if you haven’t seen it!)

‘Tangerine’ We have known this has been symbolic of Karlie, notably since the YNTCD video.

The lyrics to the song Tangerine Girl are also very interesting.

asher roth tangerine girl lyrics https://g.co/kgs/4iT5de

‘Love lorn and nobody knows’ We wouldn’t know if she was going through any break-up if she had a beard/a relationship we didn’t know about (Dianna Agron/Karlie Kloss)

‘Love thorn’ relates to ‘All my flowers grew back as thorns’ ‘I was was poison ivy but now I’m your daisy’

‘Love sick all over my bed’ has parallels to Hits Different

‘Send the Code’ Karlie is a coder

‘This is luxury’ parallels KOMH ‘The taste of your lips is my idea of luxury.’

‘Pretty face’ Not something you’d really say about somebody male.

Is It Over Now?

‘Before I called you a lying traitor’

‘You searched in every model’s bed for something greater.’ I mean, c’mon!

‘Only rumours about my hips and thighs’

‘Wilt of a rose’

The rose a metaphor for waiting.

Suburban Legends

‘We didn’t come here to be Suburban Legends’

‘I didn’t come here to make friends’

‘We were born to be national treasures’

‘You had people call you on unmarked numbers in my periphery’ parallels Snow On The Beach

‘When I ended up at that school reunion’

Say Don’t Go

I’m feeling like this is more Swiftgron in all honesty. Definitely about keeping a love secret.

We’re a shot in the darkest dark’ = ‘We never had a shotgun shot in the dark’

The dark also being a metaphor for being in the closet

‘I’m standing on a tight rope alone’ parallels to The Red Tour.

‘Half way out the door’

‘You’re not mine’

‘Cards you show’

Now That We Don’t Talk

‘I cannot be your friend so I pay the price of what I lost’

‘On the way home’

‘You grew your hair long’ Only a girl would be able to do this.

‘I can’t pretend it’s platonic’

‘On a mega yacht with important men who think important thoughts’

‘The only way to get my back my dignity was to turn into a shrouded mystery just like when you were chasing me, because that’s the way it has to be.’

Let me know your thoughts down below, and tell me if you want more analysis of anything else! 🌼

[compacflt]

Okay, so I was re-reading your Slider one-shot for like the twentieth time, and what really struck me (beyond the brilliance of your writing, and the way you’ve presented the disillusionment of growing up, expecting the world to be a certain way, only to realize that life doesn’t quite work out the way you think it will, when you’re seventeen), is the casual sexism just tossed ‘round by our main characters!! :o We have canonical evidence of both Ice and Mav being pretty sexist (what with “the plaque for the alternates is in the ladies’ room” and the downright stalker-ish behavior exhibited by Mav at the O-club…), but it still surprised me a lil’ when twenty-y/o Ice was just like: “The Soviet Union did the impossible and taught women to drive” —and I realized that ah, he truly was born in 1959, or something. There’s little scenes throughout your story where I find myself wondering, which one of them is better, in this sense: When Ice tells Mav that Sarah isn’t talking to him ‘cause of his combat kills, justifies it by saying: “You know how women are”, and Mav tells him all women aren’t the same… I thought that maybe, it was Mav; but then later, Ice shows a distinctive amount of empathy for Juno, sees and respects her for the skilled pilot that she is… and I thought that maybe, it’s Ice after all—he does seem to be more progressive and accepting than Mav, in general? It also made me wonder, that if either of them had been a woman, would they even have respected the other person enough to consider them to be a rival??—or would it have a been a mildly-amusing circus side show for them, to have a female pilot at TOPGUN?

Ty for the ask anon!! ice is more socially progressive than mav yes.

But—maybe this is my experience growing up in one of the bluest counties in Commiefornia and then going to one of the most leftist-coded colleges in one of the most leftist-coded cities in The World; uhh, even if a white man votes D all the time & has professional respect for women/minorities to their faces etc, get him in a room with a bunch of other white men, especially in a masculine and competitive environment like the gym or the navy, and uh. progressive or not, what you get is a lot of “The Soviet Union did the impossible & taught women to drive.”

And it was the 1980s. (As a reminder, in top gun’s 1986, less than 45% of Americans even approved of interracial marriage.) It sucks to say it, but if Ice was making fun of Cougar for quitting the navy cause of his psych issues such as they may be, and openly calling bullshit on Maverick’s MiG story in front of everyone, I am quite confident in saying he Would Not respect a female pilot to her face—if they were the same rank. At the same rank, it’s a competition. All weaknesses, even perceived biological ones, are to be exploited and called to attention. —But, once he’s advanced in rank, proven his own superiority, he’s more inclined to favor a meritocratic “sex doesn’t matter just fly good” attitude, ergo his relationship w/ “Juno” (she’s just a literary symbol to show that Ice may have respect for other minorities in the Navy “your career speaks for itself” but NOT FOR HIMSELF as a closeted man). This “who cares about gender/race just fly good” attitude is probably where 50s+ Maverick lands too, which is why no issues with Phoenix.

but jesus GOD maverick is a sexist in the original Top Gun. That’s why I wrote the prologue to WWGATTAI—a part of me definitely believes both he and Ice are definitively queer, but a part of me also wonders, are they just also conditioned to dismiss women as intellectual/societal equals because of their time in the 1980s male-dominated Navy? CAN they really only have a truly equal relationship with another man? I have no idea what my Ice’s sexual orientation is for exactly this reason. Yes, he’s functionally gay by the end of it, and that’s what I keep calling him—but sexuality is fluid & complicated. It’s definitely more-than possible he’s mostly straight and it’s just the circumstances of his wildly intense trauma-bond relationship with Maverick that led to their relationship as I wrote it. If you don’t LIKE/understand/respect women, and only feel at home/excited by committing acts of male-typified violence with the few men you respect, how does that bend your definition of the word straight? ...its still straight, but only straight-ish!

not to take it a step further, but WHY ELSE is canon maverick single in TGM? he canonically can’t make it work with women until he retires from the navy!!! he doesnt know how!!! His military environment is not conducive to normal long-term relationships with civilian women!!!

[captcutshaw]

That thing you said about Bruce Robinson stating that Withnail and Marwood not having girlfriends, because they are poor. That’s really funny and it does make sense! However, it’s really noticeable, if you’re used to forced heterosexual references in buddy films, that women as a whole are never mentioned by the two, never mind attraction to them. The closest we get to this are pictures of women in their walls, but most of these are press photos of actresses. As Withnail and Marwood are thespians, it looks like their interest is an artistic, rather than sexual. And as you pointed out, the only sort of attraction referenced is homosexual. As you rightfully said, Marwood comes across as almost absurdly afraid of it, but interestingly never asserts heterosexuality to compensate, as many characters in similar films do. I’m a big dummy when it come to reading films properly, but it’s interesting that while none of these things alone make Withnail and Marwood explicitly queer (gay, bisexual, asexual, etc), there is absolutely zero effort spent on trying to convince you they are straight. If it took an interview to bring it up, Bruce Robinson probably just did not think it relevant. Again, the relationship between them is treated with greater importance. Of course, we are not sure by the end that it is completely platonic, and I don’t know how intentional that was (definitely was on the part of Richard E. Grant) but the point still stands. Sorry, this is such a long message, I hope it makes sense!

Absolutely! Thank you so much for sending me this, you've given me an excuse to go off on a rant. I've put some of my own ramblings and scattered thoughts under the cut. Sorry in advance for a complete lack of coherence.

Totally agree that it's unusual for a buddy film to have Marwood simply deny he's homosexual, then not show any interest in women to prove his point. No aggressive assertions of heterosexuality or forced female love interest, hell, no mention of women whatsoever (Mrs Parkin doesn't count)

I know he's essentially Bruce Robinson's self insert, hence Marwood being sexually harassed by Monty, who was based on Franco Zeffirelli, the director who sexually harassed Bruce Robinson (sorry if I'm just saying stuff you already know here). But yeah, Marwood isn't an aggressively heterosexual character, which makes him very inviting for a queer reading, among the various other reasons. I mean....look at him. Tboy swag off the charts.

I could list all the queer codings and references in the film but we would be here forever. Don't even get me started on all the ways Withnail is easy to read as queer. But yeah, in summary, I agree with your point that the complete lack of heterosexual attraction in the film can support that queer interpretation.

That's a good point that the photos of women/actresses in their flat could be purely for aesthetic reasons because they're thespians.

As for Bruce Robinson's intentions.... There was an interview where someone asked if Withnail was gay, which Bruce Robinson and Richard E. Grant refuted (timestamp about 21:09). Here Robinson actually jokingly (?) says he thinks Withnail is asexual because he only loves himself.... asexuality isn't caused by narcissism, but hot take!

So, Withnail was never intended to be homosexual. Which is crazy to me, what with... Withnail being Withnail. There is no possible heterosexual explanation for that man's behaviour!! And it's telling that so many people have seen the film and thought he was gay. But good news! Paul McGann has made a lot of comments about Marwood and Withnail being "young marrieds" in his commentary of the film. Also, in this interview (timestamp 6:58) he says Withnail was probably in love with Marwood. Big win for the gays. Overall, Bruce Robinson did not intend for Withnail and Marwood to be read as queer, but everyone say thank you to Paul McGann. Thank you Paul McGann

(Goes without saying, the creator's intentions don't prevent people from interpreting the film the way they want to. Death to the author etc etc. I've always liked to see Marwood and Withnail as queer because that adds another layer of meaning and just....makes sense if you ask me. Their relationship is compelling, platonic or otherwise. I personally found that it doesn't make sense for either of them to be 100% heterosexual, and asexual or bisexual readings are really cool as well.)

(On that note, not sure if it's worth mentioning... I read here that Vivian MacKerrell, the man Withnail was based on, was bisexual. So. There's that. Bisexual Withnail 2023)

[suffersinfandom]

A Summary of The OFMD Meta (Part IV)

This is part four of an incomplete summary of A Meta-Discussion Of The Subtext by meratrishoslee (Mera) on AO3 (linked to, as the author requests). I’m trying to stay impartial and present the content fairly and with context. Like, I started reading this 140K beast after I saw a wild screencap and thought, "Surely there's context that makes this make sense," so I do want to provide at least that much.

This part includes interviews and a response to one of the “concern trolls that couldn't quite manage to wipe the foamy froth from their mouths long enough to keep it from dripping on their keyboards.”

No more chapter numbers because they keep being reordered.

Other posts Part I Part II Part III

Chapter The Vanity Fair Article - A Wondrous Fuckery

Here’s the article that chapter is about.

Mera suspects that the interview happened via text, giving David Jenkins time to sort out what he was going to say. They note that they’re “going on vibes and subtext, which is really more [their] wheelhouse.” You’re welcome to disagree with them.

“First off, I was trained in the House of Moftiss/BBC Sherlock fandom, where we just assumed that every word the showrunners spoke in an interview or on social media was a shameless distortion at best, and an outright lie at worst -- so that's where my mind goes first. [...] Having said that... so much of the Vanity Fair interview is an actual gift.  You do have to cherrypick somewhat... but again, DJenks just released an episode with a major character death.  He can't go back and reverse himself and suggest on any textual level that the death was less than permanent.”

VF mentions the happy endings in the finale, and Jenkins says, same-sex relationships end on a dour, downbeat note, where one of them dies and it’s unrequited or it’s unrealized; something horrible happens and they’re punished in a way.

“That's not a happy ending -- and that's exactly what you apparently fucking did with a central character.  Gosh, how weird of you to bring it up here.  So why?  Is it... is it something you left open for a third season?  That the horrible death of an unrequited love isn't what it appears?”

Jenkins says that Izzy is kind of a mentor to Blackbeard and that he is kind of a father figure. Mera says that “this is the closest he gets to queerbaiting us” because Izzy is definitely not Ed’s father figure.

“Notice we are still given the subtext here: mostly dead is slightly alive, and "kind of a father figure" feels like a limp gesture in the direction of explanation.  The rest of it... if you feel insulted on Con's behalf, that Izzy Hands was reduced to an old dog being put down at the vet's office here ("beautiful arc", "does a lot of things", "it's time", "full meal" -- god, a day at the dog park and a last fucking supper with cheeseburgers and pie and all the human food he never got to have otherwise she says sarcastically) -- YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO.”

Jenkins keeps mentioning “magic, love, turning, losing, changing, rebirth, resurrection, present tense about Izzy Hands, ghosts/life after death, or anything of those flavors.” He is “legitimizing repetition” in order “to prime your mind to see the subtext.  You can only look for something if you know what it looks like: he is giving you the key to the season.”

Jenkins reminds us that “he was not a straight white guy alone in that writers room, and he's telling you the story worked for everyone in that room of all queerness/genders.” 

“And then he brings our head back around and goes ‘hey, look at Izzy again. It's almost like he's the key to everything.  Hey, look at me using present tense on a character that's supposed to be dead and gone which would be past tense. God I love Con O'Neill, and I need you to hear that in every single interview I ever give EVER. His character IS a joy to write.’”

Mera mentions all of the “subtextual queer references and coding” put into Izzy. “You don't create a Queer Avatar by fucking accident. And these professionals certainly did not.”

Mera encourages their readers to read the Q&A that wraps the article “with the mindset that we will have an S3 where a queer self-sacrificing man rises from the dead in a damn near explicit Christ metaphor and our Izzy Hands is safe and whole and loved.”

“The Vanity Fair interview, as far as I'm concerned, is not some painful/cruel gloat. It is a subtextual love letter back to the fans, published just in time to be ready to soothe our hurting hearts -- if we know how to parse it.”

Chapter "Who Do Ya Trust If You Can't Trust God?"

“I'm finding myself tired at being the point of the spear. No one prepared me for how exhausting it is to be among the first to realize a massive truth.”

This chapter is about coping with fandom and contains some solid advice: “The block button is our friend. The unfollow button is our friend. The mute option is our friend. If someone's relentless negativity hurts your feelings or drags you down, mute/unfollow/block them as needed.”

But then:

“I choose to believe my daily-growing mountain of evidence that Izzy Hands is alive and that the writers intend that he be hollered home from the gravy basket. 

“Furthermore? If I can be painfully real for a minute? I am amazed at the trust the writers have given us. 

“Because we the Unseen Crew have been put into the position of Izzy's future lover -- to be to Izzy what Stede was to Ed.  We are called on for our audience participation now, to hold his hand and beg his return -- not for a minute, an hour, or a day... but potentially for the next several months, over a year or more, until we get Season 3. 

“I do tend to have this fatal flaw of wanting to uphold others' trust in me, and to be loyal to those who show loyalty in return.”

Mera reminds us that her word is not canon. She isn’t affiliated with the show and is just trying to provide hope and positivity.

“Even though I often will get tired... I am determined to stay positive. When I can't say something nice, I close the window or the app and say nothing at all. You will find me on my social media being as unrelentingly kind as I know how to be.”

Next: interviews and what we can take from them. “Interviews have exactly two purposes: pocket money for the subject of said interview, and promotion for the show. I was trained to never fully trust what is said in interviews.” Engagement and getting people clicking is more important than imparting useful and truthful information, and nothing engages people like anger.

That’s how we get the early “interviews that are half touching and half enraging, with seriously tone-deaf seeming self-conflicting statements from the writers/showrunners [...]. We can trust that if the interviews are live/verbal, they'll be more irritating rather than less. The showrunners would much rather say too little or say something wrong than give away something too big or too true accidentally, and in the pressure of the moment they will fall back on phrases they've memorized as safe to use.”

Don’t trust that interviews are telling you the truth (but they might be saying something truth-adjacent).

Mera has doubts about Jenkins telling O’Neill about Izzy’s death mid-season. She doesn’t think that Jenkins is that stupid. “It's not too far a stretch to think that this "mid-season" conversation occurred in the middle of filming the first season, and all DJenks is prevaricating about is the timing thereof.” 

Jenkins realized mid season one that Con is an amazing actor, so he takes him out for dinner and says, “Next season I want to kill Izzy 3 times. The first time will be Stede's dream sequence, and the next two will be actual Passion Plays, because we're setting Izzy up to be Jesus and Westley from The Princess Bride and Han Solo from Star Wars.”

“And Con takes up the challenge of being coded as an OVERT Queer Messiah (with an additional layer of subtextual HIV/AIDS)... because of course he does. Of course he fucking does. If he can pull it off -- and if anyone can, it's him -- it's the role of a fucking lifetime. It's a role for history books and media studies for the next fifty or one hundred years. 

“Doesn't that sound a bit more likely? Doesn't that sound a bit more real?”

Mera predicts that interviews and articles will start publishing ideas about Izzy still being alive, and talking about how weird and off the end of season two was. Everyone involved with the show, after all, will “know we inspect every frame and every pixel of every BTS and teaser they release,” so they’ll feed us enough to keep us guessing at the truth.

“Here is my promise to you: if/when I'm wrong about any of this, I will edit this chapter only to admit I was wrong and when and how. I will not remove my evidence.  I am comfortable being wrong.  If I was never wrong, I would never have tried and failed and learned from my failures!”

Chapter Until You Come Full Circle

This chapter is about interviews. “We’ve had, just in the last week, two very sweet and classy interviews with Con (which I did predict, although that was about as safe as saying the sun would rise in the east this morning) – and one that seemed… less so, with Taika.”

First interview with Con.

Con says to trust David Jenkins, which immediately makes Mera think of Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. “Now. Am I delulu, as the kids are calling it these days, suggesting that Con might intentionally be throwing some religious vibes at us?”

Con is also “earnest and intense” in his praise of OFMD’s writing. This is a good sign; that means he thinks the show is written well, and that’s further evidence that Izzy will be back.

Second interview with Con.

Con “seems to me to be very reluctant to outright lie, which is awesome for a meta writer and squares with my experience of him. Lying is easy in the moment and difficult in the future – a person has to remember what lies they’ve told in order to remain sufficiently consistent in their stories. It takes more skill to tell just enough of the truth that it's both vague in the moment but pays off later.” This makes interviews with him extra valuable.

A short analysis of one of his quotes: “Everything Izzy is in Season 2 was there in Season 1, only understated and repressed. According to the actor who played him: he didn’t change who he was. Izzy just got safe enough to let what was inside him out to where others could see it too.”

One of Con’s quotes backs up Mera’s Sacred Heart meta, namely the part about Izzy trying to serve the crew that loves him. 

Now a Taika interview.

This interview bolsters Mera’s idea of Ed as Judas. 

From the article: When Consequence asks writer/director/actor Taika Waititi if he’s feeling optimistic about a third season of Our Flag Means Death, his initial response is this: “Have you seen the end?”

“I think we can safely assume that Taika’s not asking the interviewer if he’s literally seen the last episode of Season 2. This feels to me like the blunt, sardonic, dry humor Taika’s evinced (and occasionally gotten into trouble over) during other interviews, aimed at the word ‘optimistic.’ ‘Have you seen the end? How optimistic did you think it was?’”

It’s not an optimistic ending. The interview mentions the inn’s renovations, but we don’t see anyone doing any renovating. Ed and Stede don’t even have food as the Revenge sails away. 

From the article: For Waititi, though, the Season 2 finale “feels like a natural end to their story. Just because I feel like, you know, they’ve been through so much and then wind up in that nice place at a happy ending.”

What nice place? What happy ending? 

From the article: Waititi says, though, that “I don’t want it to feel like Rambo III suddenly, you know, when you’re like, ‘Oh man, they have to leave their idyllic life again.'”

“Okay, everything else was fucky as fuck… but that feels wrong enough to be a lighthouse.” So Mera went and watched Rambo III, which is more relevant than she expected. 

Rambo’s “idyllic” life isn’t that great. “We don’t see an emotional, human connection. We see a white guy who’s on tolerance in a place he doesn’t really belong, separated by a language he doesn’t fluently speak. We see a man tormenting himself with boredom and isolation.”

“When you look at John Rambo through most of this movie, you see a pretty good correlation to Edward at the start of the last episode of OFMD S2: on tolerance in a place that’s not truly his home, trying to fit a life and do a job he’s not suited to… and he gives it up without another thought because a man he cares about is in danger.” A hint to season three?

Chapter My Ridiculous Obsession With Love

In this chapter, Mera addresses one of her “haters.” 

For anyone who forgot the thesis of this meta: “The overarching hypothesis I'm building in this meta-discussion is that Izzy's death was more serious because HIV/AIDS and queer grief is serious.  He had to go into the grave and take the full journey of the passion play to be able to leave it behind him, and to re-emerge as someone that can touch, kiss, and love again.”

--

Commenter: “None of that makes this a definitive interpretation, or one that the creative team can reasonably be held responsible for.” 

Mera: “... yes?  Okay, sure? (Dear non-haters: just picture that John Travolta confusion gif again, because if I threw it in here every time I rammed up against an example of begging the question in this comment, there'd be like 30 of them and we'd all get tired of them.)”

--

Commenter: “The crew hold back because Ed is the person Izzy dedicated his life to and has not yet fully reconciled with- they're giving him space to sort things with Ed so he can go in peace. Etc etc.”

Mera: “I see a rapid parade of images and sounds. "He's a dick, but he's our dick." Jim snarling "He was your friend" up into their captain's face, even though they know for a fact that could get them killed. The crew make the unicorn's leg for him together but they leave it at his door because they know he can't (yet) let himself accept it if anyone's watching: what an incredibly emotionally intelligent maneuver. The easy way that we see Jim and Lucius and Frenchie and Fang interact with Izzy in later eps-- all touching him or letting him lean on him, just never skin to skin. The way that we see Izzy go into Wee John's arms and stay held there for a while as he commits the incredibly vulnerable act of singing for them. The way that Izzy lays his hand on Stede's knee while they're talking at Jackie's bar, and there's no real animosity from them on either side then.

“So I'll give you this one, 100%.  I can't say that you're wrong or prove it in any way.  Your reading is absolutely as valid as mine, no more and no less.”

--

Commenter: “Isn't it heavily implied that people touch him with bare hands while dealing with his leg? And if he is coded as having AIDS and being untouchable, why would the crew be so willing to dive in and get covered in his blood when they treat his leg, especially when they're also scraped up at the time?”

Mera: “I haven't had a chance to write up this meta yet, but in a nutshell: we see Jim and Archie amputate his leg (with their hands pressed together in visual union atop it).  They're covered in blood and this is one of the least realistic depictions of a survivable amputation attempt in media ever, frankly... and yet Izzy lives through it!  [...]

“Notably we do NOT see Fang cleaning up.  I need to go back and verify, but I'm like 99% sure. 

“Why? Is Fang lazy or unhelpful? No, I'd say two reasons. One, he's paralyzed with grief (and the men in this show are so emotional, as Auntie rightfully notes).  But two, certain classifications of men were more susceptible to Izzy's subtextual disease. [...]

“I think it's a direct subtextual sign post to the part that lesbians/wlw/AFAB people had to play in the care of queer men dying of AIDS. [...] Jim won't catch Izzy's subtextual HIV/AIDS, ever.  Jim's hands heal and comfort, with both Izzy and Auntie -- repetition (usually) legitimizes, as I've said elsewhere.”

--

Commenter: “...while I know I have no control over this... it's alarming to see other commenters accepting this elaborate interpretation as if it's definitive.”

Mera: “Ooooh, I'd pay a dollar to find out how many comments you leave on fix-it fics. Are they also dwelling in their delusions of a world where a fictional character in a show overcomes a fictional death in the same show? Is it a sign of mental illness to indulge in word count or WORSE -- for them to irresponsibly leave those insane words just out there online where other people can also continue their madness by READING THEM?!?! The absolute horror. We writers should be ashamed, etc etc. 

“There's every possibility all the words I'm spilling over this are worth just as much as you paid for them: exactly nothing. 

“So thank goodness we have you and others like you, willing to do the purely altruistic and entirely virtuous work of... leaving comments to tell us you didn't agree? I guess?  Honestly I don't have a full lock on what your goal was here, if something other than trying to make people feel bad but fortunately not being very skilled at it.”

--

Commenter: “I wish you and every other fan nothing but the best, and for that reason, I find this hard to watch.”

Mera: “My sibling in Shiva: the 'back' button and the 'x' to close the window are available in every single web browser I have ever used in the history of the internet, ever. But I appreciate your martyrdom in staying here and nobly suffering so hard in an attempt to save me and my readers from ourselves!”

--

Commenter: “It seems like you are setting yourself and others up for even more rage and heartbreak than there would otherwise need to be.”

Mera: “I want to point out that I've tried to be very careful in not speculating about Season 3; I think it's reasonable for any fan to assume all characters living at the end of S2x08 will return in S3 unless real life status of the actors, scheduling, or budgetary considerations prevent that. 

“I want to point out that all I have are the first two seasons, and I am telling you that Izzy Hands, inside the last second of S2x08, is "mostly dead but slightly alive" -- and he's in the house, being the cause of the smell that Edward doesn't want to recognize (as he is at least twice before shown refusing to recognize what he's done as Blackbeard after the fact) but does actually recognize all the same.”

Mera admits that there are two options: “Either I'm correctly parsing the absolute bounty of subtext available in every aspect of the show, or I'm not.”

“On the day that we get that confirmation, I will feel one of two things: either the delicious vindication that I was right -- or amazement that they could build such a wondrous sky castle of subtext, whether consciously or subconsciously, and fail to complete it satisfactorily.”

“I've been wrong before and will freely and cheerfully admit it [...]. That's also why I put in my first meta post that I had been a TJLC'er -- and why I've left it in there, actually. It's correct and it's honest. Straight off I admitted I was wrong about Something Big. 

“See, it's [...] ‘hater bait,’ and it's already caught several. Lots of concern trolls that couldn't quite manage to wipe the foamy froth from their mouths long enough to keep it from dripping on their keyboards, because all of them had mentioned it... until you.”

--

“I've cackled my way through all of the writing of this post, even as I've tried to be very kind in reply -- you should have seen some of the shots I chose not to take due to their cruelty (even though they were fucking hilarious) -- so thank you for a most diverting morning.  I even got more meta and more word count out of this, so it wasn't actually a waste of productive time!”

--

Commenter: “I urge you to reconsider this approach that you're taking.”

Mera: “Here's where I'm gonna get all the way real again. Because I'm not talking to [...] that poor dear any more. I'm talking to the ones who are here with me in the stinking dark of the Pit of Despair, holding onto Izzy's naked right hand with no glove between us any more or hopefully ever again, hollering him back home out of the gravy basket.”

“If one sound had been added, everyone would know what the author knows. “We have the house. We have the grave -- with Izzy's collar on it like the dog collars on the dog graves in Pet Sematary -- where whatever comes back often comes back wrong. We've got the concept of a bad smell. We've got Stede reacting to something awful with a scream [the one thing Mera’s adding in this scenario]. 

“DONE. 

“Now the fandom is convinced that Izzy is alive, just as most of us were convinced in the last 18 months that Lucius was still alive.”

“This is part of what convinced me in the first seconds after the episode was over that Izzy wasn't dead. If I could both change the story and prove it to everyone else with just one small addition... then he's not dead.”

After Lucius was pushed overboard in season one, “I just trusted that this soft and sweet little show wouldn't actually permanently kill one of its gays. [...] And I still trust that it didn't actually permanently forever and truly kill the most gay-coded of its gays.”

[porcelainmortal]

mad love. playlist

The full fic playlist is here!!

I put together a little explanation of why I chose each song and where they correlate to the fic. Obviously, spoilers ahead if you haven't read the fic so please wait until you're done with it to read these!!

Track List and justifications:

Mad Love. by Jojo The title track and oddly, not the inspiration for this fic. But when I was thinking about this fic in the early days of writing it, it occurred to me that this song was perfect. It encapsulates the tone of the fic; a passionate and somewhat toxic relationship. 

You Feel It Too by Moxy the Band This song fit this fic so perfectly that I listened to it almost nonstop for like three days after I added it to the playlist. It’s Henry’s internal monologue during the early chapters (although it could absolutely be Alex’s too), but it also contains these clips from “Good Will Hunting” of Robin Williams talking about how love doesn’t have to be perfect, as long as you’re perfect for each other. Full quote and lyrics here. (Also, this band is amazing and you should check out their full album. I had the chance to catch them live last fall and it was such a blast.)

Love On The Brain by Rihanna Another song about toxic but passionate love, this one entered my radar during a Tumblr WIP ask game back in July. I was looking for songs that might fit and a Google search led me to this. It just felt right.

Just Missed the Train by Kelly Clarkson This might seem like a weird tonal shift after Rihanna, but I loved that the lyrics are about missed chances and looking back. It also acts as a good transition from the super sultry, soulful Rihanna song to the slightly more alternative songs that follow.

Cross Your Mind by Calum Scott I have several Calum Scott songs on my personal RWRB book playlist, so I really wanted to include one of his. (Also, he’s gay and British and I really wanted to get more queer artists on this list.) This song fit the tone just right and again, acted as a good transition into the next song, which is definitely a tonal shift.

Blinded (When I See You) by Third Eye Blind I went back and forth a lot on whether or not to include this song since it has such a different sound from most of the other tracks, but ultimately, I couldn’t pass it up. It’s about being friendly with an ex lover and still wanting them; fitting into their life and pretending that everything is fine. Also, the lyrics in the chorus about being blinded like you’re staring down the sun… that’s Henry coded af.

When Love Hurts by Jojo Drastic tonal shift here but it ushers in the second “act” of the playlist. It also felt too perfect for the flashback in chapter 3 when Alex and Henry are out at the club before winter break. This chapter is about jealousy and it’s when their relationship starts to really become strained. If you know anything about young people, they often thrive in the drama of a tumultuous relationship because it feels very adult when it’s actually the opposite. 

Tell Me You Love Me by Demi Lovato I loved this song for Henry’s need to be loved and always be the one apologizing to Alex. in chapter 4 they have that big argument about summer break and Henry’s feeling very insecure. He doesn’t know if Alex really wants him around anymore and he doesn’t really have anyone else. I love the desperation in this song and how it reflects that Henry can see them falling apart already, but doesn’t know who he’d be without Alex anymore.

Little Do You Know by Alex & Sierra This song is about a couple that are both sleepless and restless due to the problems in their relationship, but they love each other endlessly. It’s beautiful and sad and it speaks to their communication issues, which ultimately will be a big part of their downfall.

The Pieces Don’t Fit Anymore by James Morrison One of the saddest songs I’ve ever heard. I’ve loved this song since the first time I heard it around 2007 and I loved how perfectly it fit here. In the current part of chapter 5, Henry and Alex are both looking back and wondering where it went wrong. Meanwhile, in the flashback, Henry’s desperately holding onto Alex with both hands. 

Our Song by Pink Two reasons I chose this song: first, it’s fucking sad. Like, heartbreakingly sad. But I also loved the parallel of the title “Our Song” when their song in canon is “Your Song.” This song bridges the start of their relationship (where they got together on the dance floor) to their impending breakup.

Say Something by A Great Big World and Christina Aguilera Another one of the saddest songs ever, amiright? I almost didn’t include it because it’s so well known, but I felt it fit that moment when Henry is walking out and just waiting for Alex to stop him but he just… doesn’t. I also love that it’s a duet, reflecting that they’re both hurting equally but don’t know what to do.

What Hurts the Most by Jo O’Meara This is NOT my favorite version of this song, but my favorite version (Cascada) just didn’t fit here. The Rascal Flatts version wasn’t right, either. It might have been if this was Alex’s story, but… alas. In my research I discovered that this song has been covered a ton of times, but the first person to actually release it as a single was Jo O’Meara, lead singer of the British 90s group S Club 7. It was a hit for her in England and would probably be the version Henry knows best.

I Was Wrong by Sleeperstar This song just breaks my heart. This song is Henry’s shock at the relationship actually ending and about his regret over hurting Alex. It’s so deliciously angsty.

Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson The way I used to belt this song out in my car… but I digress. The lyrics to this song are obvious, no? “I didn’t come here to hurt you, now I can’t stop.” Just stab me in the heart.

All I Want by Kodaline This song is by an Irish band, which I love for various reasons. It’s Henry coming to terms with how badly he still wants Alex and ushers us into the third “act” of the playlist. “Our love was made for movie screens.”

That’s Us by Anson Seabra Henry is at the therapist now, recalling their relationship and looking back over what they had, trying to decide if he wants to risk it all again. The lyrics are just perfect in my opinion.  

My All by Mariah Carey Passionate, desperate wanting. I just love how intense this song is… that’s how Henry feels, even if he’s bad at expressing it.

Love Me Like You Do by Ellie Goulding Henry is finally going after what he wants. While he definitely doesn’t mean for he and Alex to fall right into bed, he’s also desperate for it. “Love me like you do,” is a twofold meaning here; Henry wants Alex physically, but he wants his actual love more.

Fire Meet Gasoline by Sia Another song that I have loved for years and was thrilled to find a use for. Alex is the fire, Henry’s the gasoline. He’s happy to burn, so long as they’re doing it together. 

RAIN by Ben Platt I HAD to have a Ben Platt song on here. I also loved the idea of ending this playlist with an upbeat, happy song; they’re so hopeful and excited when they get together. They’re taking the leap and choosing to have faith in one another. 

Fire On Fire by Sam Smith Surprise epilogue song! Originally this playlist ended on track 21, but then I heard this song and just thought it was perfect for the epilogue. Also, it let me squeeze another queer artist onto the list! Listen to these lyrics… that’s them.

Thoughts?? Tell me what you think! I love this playlist and have listened to it a hundred times. It also went through about a thousand different iterations and I’m pretty happy with where it ended up. 

I tried hard to get more queer artists on here, but I’ll admit my knowledge is fairly limited since I mostly listen to metal and metal-adjacent music in my free time. (Though I have a soft spot for showtunes and powerful female pop singers.) I know some of you were probably looking for Taylor Swift and whatnot, but it’s just not my jam. I hope you love it anyway! 

Thank you so much for reading and listening! 

[runninguplenorahills]

Guys, I’m currently defending byler in a discussion with 4 melvins/anti bylers😭💀

They’re saying the usual bullshit though:

1)If you think byler is endgame you’re not paying attention

To which I replied that byler is actually hidden in plain sight and it doesn’t take much to see that it is in fact happening. So they said:

melvin has been held as an endgame couple since s1 and that it’s very unlikely that they’d deviate from the core ship

And then I said that they already are deviating from the “core ship” and that it really does not take much to see that s4 did not end well for melvin! They have not replied yet.

2)It’s not gonna happen and I’m glad because it’s a bad ship and Will deserves better than Mike

To which I simply said that I’m not trying to be mean, but that I recommend rewatching the show if they really think Will deserves better than Mike! Though I know for a fact that it won’t lead anywhere since they’ll take everything at surface level just as they probably did the other times they’ve watched the show. They did not reply yet.

3)Mike is straight

That made me laugh hahahahhahha. I told them to get familiar with what queer coding is and how it presents itself in media. They did write “mike is straight” in all caps though so I’m very sure they’re not gonna like my answer lmao. They also did not reply yet.

4)Byler has an equal chance of not happening

To which I replied that that’s simply incorrect because with the way the narrative is built, byler is the only logical outcome. So they said:

But you can’t be sure. We don’t know what’s gonna happen in s5 so they might as well not end up together

So I recommended reading analysis/evidence/predictions for this if they want to because it would certainly make them see that byler is in fact definitely happening, to which they replied:

But if it doesn’t happen you’ve gotten your hopes up over nothing but fan theories

And I said I don’t care lmao

I will keep you guys updated hahaha (if you want me to)

I also feel the need to tell you guys that I did not start those arguments! I just commented something about byler under a byler post! And they came for me hahahaha. I’m being like, really nice though (way nicer than this small recap of what I replied to each of them), so in the end if one of them starts attacking me personally they’re the pathetic ones lmao 🤷‍♀️

[sunwarmed-ash]

🔥Sinful Sunday🔥

Death changes everything Chapter 2: Don't you know who I think I am?

Fandom: Stranger Things

Ships: Mungrove, healing Harringrove, steddiegrove/harringroveson/metalsandwich

Tags: EmOTiOnz, Bad Ass Mother Fucking Wayne Munson, Abusive Neil Hargrove, inferred child abuse, harringrove catharsis, Billy hargrove needs a hug, and two boyfriends, emotional sex, M/M/M

Trigger warnings: homophobia, homophobic language

Chapter summary:

It had been three weeks, since their night together. And Eddie had become obsessed since. He only knew that because Robin had just told him, 

“You’re obsessed,” while they were sitting under the oak tree at lunch. Steve didn't join them today, which Eddie is actually grateful for. He doesn't know how to broach the topic of sleeping with Billy, Steve’s ex, with his new best friend. 

He told Robin immediately, had to, she was his absolute best friend, wingman, right hand man and partner in crime. Had been since 7th grade orchestra and they never looked back. They were the definition of The Odd Couple, but it benefited both of their strives toward queer anonymity that people just assumed it was natural the two weirdos were dating each other. They never bothered correcting the assumption, except with other queerdos who knew about The Code. Steve, recently awoken bisexual, fell into that category, and his relationship with Billy was complicated in the simplest, most convenient of terms. 

Eddie let out a heavy sigh. He could feel tears brimming on the edge og lids, but he couldnt let them fall. Not now. 

“He’s gonna hate me.”

Robin sighs heavily now too. And eddie hates hes the one who made her make that sound. 

“Every day you put it off is only making it worse.”

“Gee thanks alot Rob,”

“Well im sorry! I’ve tried the kind and compassionate route! Look where its gotten you!”

Shes right, of course she is, but he still doesn't want to hear it. 

“Eddie,” she sighs, interlacing her arm with his and kissing the edge of his bicep the way she does only when shes about to deliver some hard truths, “its gonna suck. Yeah. But, he will get over it. You gotta give Steve the chance to be okay with it before you convince yourself he won’t be. He won't hurt you, Steve’s not like that, but, it’s going to hurt him. I don’t think Steve will ever be over Billy.”

The tears fall anyway. 

“Fuck.” Which is annoying because he let himself be convinced he could save two dollars and go without waterproof eyeliner and now he’s paying the price. “I don't deserve either of them.”

“Stop that shit right now. I think you might be freaking yourself out a little. It’s just sex.”

“Sex with Billy is not just sex to Steve.”

“You're not Steve.”

“You're right, I’m a slut and an idiot.”

Robin sighs at his self depricary, resting her head against his bicep now. 

“Invite Steve over, make him dinner, then tell him. Then talk to Billy. If you’re asking for my advice.”

He was, he really was at his wits end after 3 weeks of no further contact, new injuries on Billy, and too long in his own head. 

“I love you.”

Robin snorted. 

“That’s so gay Munson. But I love you too.”

It got Eddie to laugh too, and he was so happy to have her as a platonic soulmate.

[ratstarxx]

ok so i’ve recently been listening to more taylor swift and i’m noticing some queer coding in her songs

but first i’m gonna preface this by saying - i do not endorse or support speculation on anyone’s sexuality

exhibit 1 Lavender Haze

i immediately noticed this song once i heard some other nods to the queer community because lavender has been a symbol for us folk for a long time. if you’re not aware — in the 1970s lavender was associated with homosexuality, and especially lesbians. the term ‘Lavender Menace’ was used to undermine lesbians and the title was reclaimed by an activist group. i’m aware that the term ‘lavender haze’ can also be used in a general romantic way but this song definitely still stands out to me

exhibit 2 right where you left me

it’s less of the entirety of this song like Lavender Haze but more of just the lyric “I, I swear you could hear a hair pin drop” the meaning of a hair pin drop is basically someone leaving (dropping) little hints (hair pins) to their own homosexual identity. i find it especially interesting that taylor mentions hearing the hair pin drop as the stonewall riot has been called “Hairpin Drop Heard Around the World”

exhibit 3 You Need to Calm Down

this is again more of a general song theme that can easily be seen as a queer experience. i’ve found that taylor uses a lot of metaphors in her lyrics so i believe that this is a metaphor for ‘being too loud’ with self expression and being to ‘you need to calm down’. many queer folk experience this once they’ve become comfortable in their identity and maybe taylor has gone through this too? the whole ‘i don’t like how openly queer you are’ kind of backlash you get for merely being yourself

exhibit 4 betty

when i first heard this song i was kind of confused on the whole love triangle thing but i can definitely tell she is in love with betty. i don’t know if i even have to go in depth about this - taylor shows up at betty’s party, wants betty to have her, love her, kiss her, but i think that they’re both too scared to be out and taylor pines for her (i know there’s people out there who understand wtf is happening in this song - plz explain if i’m wrong)

exhibit 5 seven

so i may see this song as queer merely because i love it and just want to self insert but i think there’s some romantic tension between taylor and the other girl (whose name she can’t remember). it is said in the song that “i still got love for you” i see that line more platonically — where as the other mentions of the detail of her braid, the memory of the things they liked to do together shows the infatuation and love they have for each other. the “hide in the closet” line also alludes to a queer relationship they may have where taylor just wants them to leave (ex move to india forever) so that they can be together

exhibit 6 mary’s song

i’ve actually never seen anyone mention this song when talking about taylor’s queer coding but i see the song as taylor and mary in love. their dads joke about them falling in love and their moms just roll their eyes. the song shows the ups and downs of their relationship as they grow old together and how taylor still sees mary’s just as beautiful as when they were seven and nine

anywho i bet there’s tons more that i didn’t go into so feel free to add more in the comments or whatever

[inkybinkyboink]

no ok heres my hot take on the whole “breaking bad characters opinions on queer folk” headcanons except its a masterpost with every single character i can think of and it’s in alphabetical order because of my undying need for approval from fictional characters. queerphobic percentages included no extra charge!!!!!!!!!!!

badger: 33% - badger’s been hanging out for long enough to know that people come in all shapes and sizes, no two are the same and that doesn’t confuse him, but he thinks it’s weird. definitely believes that there’s a “normal” and a “not normal”.

chuck: 64% - good lord this man grew up following the rules and probably catholicism. he’s such a pain in the ass abt it too, like he’ll bring up biology the first chance he gets.

francesca: 21% - shes spoken to enough shitty people to the point where as long as you’re not a dick to her she could not give less of a fuck who you are or what you do at home. 

gale: 0% - gale is the one character at zero percent for a reason. he’s just,,so full of love???

gus: 1% - ok this was kind of a joke but you cannot look at this man and tell me he doesn’t not have an iota of internalized homophobia in him. 

hank: 78% - hes just,,,,so conservative-coded. i don’t trust him. i feel like he’d talk abt queer people like “snowflakes” and uses “blue hair and pronouns” but in the most derogatory way possible.

howard: 24% - idk man i just think he’d be chill with it. he seems like a homie. 

huell: 31% - man grew up religious in louisiana like bro. strikes me as a “hate the sin, love the sinner” kind of guy but in the most nonchalant way possible.

jane: 5% - goddamn bro she’s probably queer herself but? god look at her and tell me there isnt a small part of her that harbors the most micro-aggressive biphobia you’ve ever seen.

jesse: 22% - like ok jesse’s funky bc at the beginning of the show hes definitely further up there, but as he grows as a character i think it would go down bc he learns people can be kind, and it’s not based at all in what they do or who they are. like he doesn’t get it, but he’s super willing to listen and learn, but only like,,,after the events of el camino. any time before that i think he would just kind of brush it off.

kim: 15% - she’d go to a pride parade. but also she doesn’t actively advocate for queer rights. but she’s totally cool with it.

lalo: 28% - k so lalo is so gender i struggle to see him as a purely black and white queerphobic person. like, i dont think he’d get it, or understand it, but he also doesnt,,,care,,,like, he’d kill you either way but he’d also ask you your pronouns before he kills you

marie: 67% - her husband is hank and her sister is skyler. need i say more. she gets SUPER terf-y.

mike: 36% - ok so i think he’s kind of in the same boat as lalo, except i added points bc theyre from different generations, which i do think affects viewpoints. but like on any given day mike does not care. he doesn’t care, but also he’s not gonna drive you to your hrt appointment. yknow? 

nacho: 12% - look ok i wouldn’t put it past nacho to have experimented himself, i think he understands better than a lot of people that identity and sexuality is fluid. also? idk i feel like he would find the concept of identity interesting, so he’s done a lot of research of his own and stuff.

saul: 26% - saul’s kind of on the same road as jesse i think. like jimmy mcgill would try to listen and understand, but saul just kind of,,,doesn’t care. also probably micro-aggressive but would never actively do anything shitty.

skinny pete: 25% - similar to badger, but he doesn’t think it’s weird, he thinks it’s cool. absolutely watches rupauls drag race.

skyler: 43% - like ok if one of skyler’s kids came out to her, she would be a lot more supportive, but otherwise she just kind of lives in her own bubble where she oversexualizes the concept of queer people and thinks that all drag queens are trans women.

todd: 56% - gd bro todd lives with nazis. that’s a pretty confident contender for not being the most accepting. but of course, it’s todd, so he’s gonna be nice about it? but absolutely trash talks queer ppl behind their back. 

tyrus: 35% - we know little to nothing abt tyrus’ backstory but he gives me rlly calm vibes. idk. he doesnt pay much attention to it. has pre-existing notions of queer folk that give him a more negative bias.

tuco: 88% - dude. dude. dude. tuco is a loose canon. please never let me near him. i will die. so quickly. 

walter: 35% - ive seen fanfics and implications that him and elliot had something going on, but also walters kind of a total dick? like he’s homophobic bc his own experiences were shitty so he assumes the worst from then on out.

walt jr: 29% - ok everyone says walt jr. would be transphobic but i disagree. hes part of the younger generation, i feel like he would understand it more than anything? i know thats not applicable to every like,,younger person but he’s more surrounded by like,,society and stuff??? idk i think he’d kind of just shrug it off and support it.

victor: 74% - he just...i dont like his vibes. i dont like ‘em. i feel like he’d be rlly douchy if he found someone he was working with or was friends with was queer or trans. 

[creatingblackcharacters]

"That's the Black one!"- Imagery and "Black-Coded" Characters

Now, you see me writing it!! I'm writing the lesson on Black-coded, non-human characters!! Y'all better go tell your friends and reblog, y'all been asking me forever about it!

This one was a bit hard for me to write. It didn't feel… New. It felt like a regurgitation of everything I'd already discussed. I was honestly confused every time people sent me questions; I thought we all understood how it worked. But I realized: that's not a bad thing! We can consider this an application of everything we've learned so far, because that’s all coding is, is an application!

The Definition

Coding (in media): giving a character or a group certain traits (physical or cultural experiences) that are similar to/that of a real-world specific group, without explicitly saying this fictional group is the real-world group. One may or may not mean to do it in their writing (which is where the opportunity for racist stereotype can leak in).

E.g., “queer-coded characters” gets used a lot on Tumblr; whether accurate or not, it is understood to mean that the blogger sees their/a queer identity portrayed by that character, or that the character was written with ‘queer’ traits in mind. Another example; Darwin Watterson is a goldfish in a world with no humans, but Darwin is Black-coded. The Fishmen in the One Piece Live Action are fantastical creatures, but they are Black-coded (of a very specific type of Black person; even!)

Youtuber KermitCurry explains and reinforces what I’m also going to explain here, but with a cool drawing of (the gorgeous) Grimmjow. She’s a Black artist and animator; go check her out and support her!

Here is a list of a few characters both canonically and Black-fanonically Black-coded:

When Coding Characters as Black

To keep it simple: if the rules apply when designing and writing a Black character, the same rules apply when designing and writing a Black-coded character! The moment you decided that this nonhuman entity was going to resemble a human group of people, you were obligated to be aware of the cultures and stereotypes of those people!

You can’t have a Black-coded character, emphasize a stereotype of Black people, and then say “oh, well, it’s not actually racist because they’re actually a cat-wolf creature!” Yes, it is. You’re still being racist, and upon noticing or being told, there’s no need to be defensive about it- just acknowledge ‘ah yes, I’ve messed up, I'm sorry for my actions’ and then actively work towards a better design or writing that does not include those things.

Example: Hair

Let’s say you want to draw hair on a fish-like Mer species, and you want them to be Black-coded. It would still be racist to give that Mer-woman pickaninny hair, even if "well they're not really Black!" You could find fancy fish scales or seaweed or something fish related to draw ‘Black hair textures’, so that we understand what it’s visually supposed to represent while still being fantastical. Or a robot! Someone mentioned tubes for locs, and you could do curly wires for twists. It's possible! Get creative!

I’ve been asked numerous times about Black hair on furries. Not that I’m the most educated on furries or furry culture- I am not- but they’re already anthropomorphic animals that talk, have human hobbies and habits, and often have pretty rainbow colors. It should not, then, warrant a complaint of “unrealistic” if you respectfully add Black hairstyles to them.

Example: Species

The point about furries actually brings up another good point. Watch out when you're coding Black characters on animals or animal-like species. Often people will have the “dark-skinned, struggling with balancing their humanity monster” Black/Black-coded, and the “pale skinned monster that somehow understands this battle more than them and can save them from themselves”. This is rooted in racist imagery.

I have mentioned it before in response to an ask, but if the only people you find yourself coding as your ‘monkey/animal/monster/beast’ creations are Black and/or dark-skinned, you are- however intentional it is or isn’t- replicating a racist, dehumanizing pattern in league with King Kong and ‘ravishing the white woman/body’. I’m not inherently ‘rugged and masculine’ as a queer Black woman, thus meant to be pushed into the werewolf role. Black men aren’t beasts that can’t control their violent impulses, thus meant to be pushed into the animalistic role. Why do you think Black bodies being beast-like is sexy? Why do you think we are not physically capable of delicacy? Of gentility?

This doesn’t mean that Black characters can’t be werewolves or those sorts of creatures- but you need to be writing/designing with intent, and that means recognizing when you just ‘thought it looked cool’, and that thought turned out to be a racist belief upon further reflection.

Example: Skin

Let’s say your demon species has dark grey skin bc they're rock people or something- yes, the grey skin is because it's a demon species, we recognize that it's not desaturated brown skin. Fine. But God forbid that this grey-skinned ashen group of Black-coded characters are the unequivocal villains? And everyone else that isn’t Black-coded are the ‘good guys’? But ‘it’s okay, because they’re not Black, they’re grey!’? Yes, this is still racism. There’s no getting out of it.

Example: Intelligence

If your Black-coded species is the one that is ‘less cultured’, ‘talks funny’, supposed to be ‘stupid’, or in need of some good (white) character to ‘change their ways and become better people’… Just don't do that. I should not have to say this. Black people are not less intelligent, or ‘more inclined to brawn over brain’, 'more likely to act out of instinct', ‘in need of more education/direction’, or every other reason that was used to justify our enslavement and now, present arrest and imprisonment rates.

Example: Culture

This segues from my last point on intelligence. There’s arguments on coding species that are meant to be "savage" or "inhuman", giving them stereotypical loin cloths or tattered clothes and having them "need to be saved". Now, I'm not informed enough about D&D to make valuable commentary on the existence and history of orcs. However, if you've decided to create an Orc culture, and it's clear that your imagery is taken from Black and/or Indigenous cultures, in addition to the language of savagery and white saviorism itself… That's extremely racist. And if you're thinking "Ice, of course no one would do that in 2024", Yes. Yes, they would. The bar is low, but don't ever assume people can't, don't, and won’t find a way to limbo under it.

Black and Brown people don’t need to be ‘saved’ from our own cultures or ‘introduced’ to anything. We don't need to be 'made better'. If that’s the narrative that you find yourself buying into while you write your story, Black or Black-coded characters, you need to step back and evaluate.

How This Imagery Lasts

Jim Crow Museum- Racist Cartoons and Anti-Black Imagery

This is obviously not everything I could put here as a example, but I wanted to offer a small example of how heinously racist imagery has made its way into the present. From depicting Serena Williams as an overgrown, childish, large-lipped Black woman (and whitewashing Afro-Japanese woman Naomi Osaka into the ideal, victimized blonde white woman), to Lebron James’ Vogue photo (this Black, married man now suddenly slave to the intensity of ball and white women for this cover), to the entirety of the Black Pete festival in the Netherlands.

This is imagery and behavior that evolves and lasts. What you put to paper will have an effect on someone else's ideas. You might not even think you believe these things, but someone looking at your art or reading your work will think you do! You should not want to be evoking any of this, coded or not, regardless of ‘if there’s a human involved’ because frankly… well, people already don’t see Black people as humans. We need to be treating our Black and Black-coded characters with care, and that means doing good research and avoiding replicating caricatures.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Not related to anything specific but the only thing worse than allistics being like ‘you’re missing the point diagnosing (character) as autistic! They’re just quirky with a bad home life!’ Is media neurodivergents saying that and pulling the ‘but I’m neurodivergent so you can’t tell me I’m wrong’ card. Like what the fuck is that? They always act so superior about it too.

Also I think people need to reckon with the fact that in a pushback against the rude savant stereotype the community now acts like the only valid rep is weirdly sexless uwu innocent infantilised characters especially concerning non male characters. Every time I hear someone say a char is bad rep because they’re not a sweet socially acceptable angel or ‘too stereotypical’ I roll my eyes- *I* am stereotypical under the masking and we’re ppl not, like, moral lessons??

Yeah, I've seen that sometimes and it is really irritating. I hate it when people think their interpretation of a character is The Only Valid Interpretation, and particularly when they pull the "well I'm actually [insert neurodivergence here] so I know this character can't be that" - or "well I'm actually queer so I know this character can't be that", I've seen that too - when they're... talking to someone who is also neurodivergent or queer or whatever in the same ways as them. It makes me want to shout "your opinion is not the only valid one!".

And yeah, I agree that some people have really just reacted to certain autism stereotypes by being like "oh, the answer to this is to stereotype all autistic people, but like, the other way around!". Like... no, we shouldn't be stereotyping at all?? I feel like "stereotypical representation" is a useless phrase when it comes to autism at this point, because some people use it to mean rep that's like "oh this cishet white man character is a bigot and hates women but it's ok because he's autistic uwu" (*cough* Atypical *cough*), but then other people use it to mean... any character who doesn't align with their exact personal experiences. And when it comes to reading characters as autistic, I feel like people are simultaneously like "you can't say they're autistic, they're smart, so it's a stereotype!" and like "you can't say they're autistic, they're not smart, you're stereotyping autistic people as stupid!". (The latter really annoys me as an autistic person who isn't smart.) I don't even know what people want, are we supposed to never call characters autistic at all?? Also, like, as I sort of already said lol, a lot of this supposed ~pile of representation~ for "stereotypically" autistic people is representation specifically for well-off, cishet, white men (Atypical, Rain Man, The Good Doctor, etc. etc.). It's not actually representing anyone who doesn't fit into that little group, even if they have stereotypical traits!

I was probably not coherent with any of this but yeah, I definitely get your frustration. (This sort of discourse is one of many, many reasons why I basically stopped engaging with autism circles on the internet.) I'm glad the Holby fandom isn't bigger, lol, because otherwise I feel like I wouldn't be able to call any character autistic without getting yelled at about "stereotyping" (Henrik, Arthur, and Eli would all probably be deemed "too smart" and therefore stereotypes, Chantelle would probably be deemed "too stupid" and thus a stereotype). (Also, it's interesting that you brought up gender because I've definitely noticed that there seems to be a thing with autistic/autistic-coded male characters where if they don't already fit the "uwu sweet angel" trope, fandom simply infantilises them until they do fit - at least, this is what happens with Henrik. I hardly ever see it happen in the same way with autistic/autistic-coded female characters.)

[starrylayle]

Sophie and Agatha don’t need to be a couple to be queer.

I really dislike the rhetoric that if agaphie isn’t canon, than Agatha and Sophie are straight. They are both EXTREMELY queer coded as just individuals. (tbh so many of the sge characters are -- that series is the gayest fucking heteronormative shit I have ever laid eyes on smh) 

Let’s start with Agatha, coz hers is the most obvious. That girl is a bisexual through and through. From the start, she is already deemed an outsider by her village; that Randy guy or whatever even says that she “has no friends and is queer”.  So, from the get-go, Agatha is already different. She also doesn’t fit into the conventional notions of femininity. She doesn’t like very traditional feminine activities. In the books, she dresses goth as opposed to the very ‘girly’ girls in her village. In the movies, she dresses in a very androgynous/masc style. (also keep in mind that this series is 19th inspired — so what was considered gnc is gonna be different)

When she’s sent to the school for good, she is forced into roles of femininity that she never had to before. However, as much as she hates it, she still wants to be perceived as beautiful and normal, hence the famous dovey ‘you’re beautiful just the way you are’ scene. 

Now from then on, i wish that instead of deciding to change herself and beecome very feminine, Agatha, decides to accept who she is, and maybe even wears a suit to the dance or smth. Now, alot of people argue that Agatha had to unlearn her internalised misogyny, which she definitely had a lot of; please remember that alot of this misogyny came from never being accepted as the girl that she was in her home town. Once Dovey accepts her and tells her that she’s beautiful, Agatha is able to feel more confident and secure in gender presentation more than ever while ALSO accepting the girls around her who are more feminine.

Ok, now moving onto Sophie. that girl is the biggest comphet lesbian i have ever seen. Like please, her attraction to men is not geniune in the slightest. Her crush on Tedros was more about securing her status as the princess she always wanted to be, her crush on Rafal was also about status, and the desperate need to feel loved and wanted by somebody. And as for Rhian, I assume she just wanted to feel loved properly after her failed relationships (don’t even get me started on hort -- she settled for that boy big time and i’m still mad about it).

I definitely think that before the sisters plot she had a crush on agatha (and agatha had a crush on her lol) and later on she was def in love with Nicola -- No i will not elaborate (ok perhaps i will but on a seperate post lmao).

Anyways, as much as i wish Agaphie had been canon, I wish at least we got a confirmation that Agatha is bi & gnc (or perhaps nb??) and that Sophie is a lesbian with comphet. They are both so fucking queer coded and we deserved it. Having hope that this is addressed in the movie. 

Also lets not even get started on Tedros’ bi coding lol.

[ghooostbaby]

deeeep dive into why and how wei wuxian and lan wangji love each other, complete each other, are the inverse reflection of each other’s deeply hidden internal selves mirrored through the other’s external self, lan wangji’s inner wildness that he has to conceal and protect recognizing and loving wei wuxian’s outer wildness, wei wuxian’s deep, fuddy-duddy morality and values that he conceals with an elaborate subterfuge of jokes, mischief, and bravado, seeing and loving in lan wangji the ability to say no that it was never safe for him to express directly, “between you and me there is no need for thank you and sorry”

oh and a slight diversion midway through into a manifesto on WEI WUXIAN IS NOT INSECURE the whole story is about a society where being liked is ESSENTIAL for survival and it is actually completely perilous not to be liked, and his “people pleasing” is a skill and tool for his survival especially as an orphan and proven to be a necessary one when he stops doing it and STOPS SURVIVING

after the cut discussing the very interesting dynamics of consent in general in the novel, but not going into the consensual non-consent kink stuff till the last paragraph if you need to avoid for any reason.

I've been thinking about how Lan WangJi sees in Wei WuXian the exterior, unfettered expression of the wildness Lan WangJi holds in him and protects with rigid codes of conduct, propriety and outward dignity.

I have had this sense that these two are mirrors, either one reflecting the hidden, interior (and unallowed) self of the other. but it seemed more clear from Lan WangJi's side, especially knowing about his history with his mother and the spicy side that emerges when he drinks and in the extras.

I also - just... the way this whole story shows how romantic love is truly this longing for your self, to become yourself, to become the thing you're not allowed to be, seeing in that person the expression of whatever it is you can't become and longing for it, protecting it, joining with it as closely as you can without ever being able to let it live inside your own body.

On the surface it seems a lot more difficult for Wei WuXian to find a piece of his soul in Lan Wangji. I think its a bit too simplistic to see whatever draws Wei WuXian to Lan Wangji as a reverse-psychology sort of craving of acceptance from the only one who won't give it, pushing and pushing against this impenetrable boundary that he needs to break to feel assurance that no matter what he can make anyone accept him.

And he is SO drawn - in a mind boggling way, in the teenage flashbacks Lan WangJi rudely and aggressively throws him off over and over and Wei WuXian cannot keep away! Even when he talks about how boring Lan WangJi is, he never stops trying to be around him and talk to him.

I've seen discussions of the way Wei WuXian has always relied on the goodwill of others to survive, and that his placating of others to survive is a character flaw. Although that seems only halfway true. 

As a young child he didn't have anyone's goodwill for a while and he survived, and it seems like he can always find a way to survive from whatever means and sometimes very limited resources he has at his disposal. Doing what he has to do to become powerful enough to survive losing his core and being thrown into the burial mounds slowly costs him the goodwill of everyone around him - and what happens to him as a result shows how much placation was a truly necessary for someone without the protection of biological/hereditary family bonds.

(Don’t get me started on how his loss of his golden core and his development of demonic cultivation to give himself power by ‘unnatural methods’ through the use of a musical instrument is a metaphor for disability and the way ableist society sees the use of accessibility devices and tools. Actually please DO get my started haha.)

Wei WuXian is so charismatic and seems very used to getting what he wants and needs on the strength of that. He pushes a lot of boundaries and seems pretty confident and flexibly prepared to handle the consequences, whether beatings or harsh words. But he does work so hard to make others feel good, good with him, good with themselves.

When he is in the cave with Lan WangJi, Wei WuXian is described as "like one who forgets all past pain as soon as the wound heals". He can't resist coming up beside Lan WangJi and talking to him again and again after every time Lan WangJi pushes him off, only finally staying away when Lan WangJi bites him (and he still keeps trying to talk to him after a little bit!) and then calls him an awful person (!!! Bad Wangji! :(((( ). In the end, when Lan WangJi (very minimally) discloses what happened to his sect and his father, and even cries, because of all the defences/assaults Lan WangJi has put up Wei WuXian can't do anything or say anything to help and feels miserable.

Lan WangJi just absolutely refuses to allow Wei WuXian to take care of him - and I began to wonder maybe that’s what Wei WuXian actually really likes about him? Why he is unable to resist coming up to Lan WangJi again and again? Maybe because Lan WangJi refuses to let Wei WuXian appease him. He’s not trying to crack Lan WangJi to get to this impenetrable place of approval and acceptance. In a way he can’t quite understand, Lan WangJi is a respite for Wei WuXian from the constant work to be the one who pleases.

And  how different this is to how Wei WuXian is (or has to be) with Jiang Cheng when he wakes up in Lotus Pier after the cave. Jiang Cheng gets so down and really really needs Wei WuXian to do what he does so well (and wasn’t allowed to do with Lan WangJi) - chasing Jiang Cheng down while being injured and reassuring him about all his insecurities about his father's acceptance and becoming a sect leader and Wei WuXian's own abilities excelling his - and at first Jiang Cheng is pushing him away, but he really does need Wei WuXian to do all this to feel better.

Wei WuXian is described as not wanting to be lonely, and not wanting to see other people unhappy, and he keeps trying to push and pull with whatever he has to not be lonely and lift the mood for those around him. I don't think it's a kind of codependency or insecurity. It’s not that Wei WuXian is afraid to say no, in fact I would say he doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do, but he must always do it creatively, with humour. Similarly to Nie Huaisang, he uses a persona of foolishness to give himself a covert agency.

I also think I'm writing this because I don't like seeing this discussed as a sad bean character flaw for him to always need to be liked - its a strategy, its a tool, its how he survives and excels. Doesn’t the whole story prove how essential being liked is to a human’s survival? And he is so so good at being liked, in making others happy, even when he is refusing to do what others want from him that he doesn't want to do, he does it in a way that deflects criticism, with a smiling bravado that never says what it truly means and has people writing him off as shameless or foolish or just endearing himself toward them despite themselves.

He is always at work really, with jokes and flattery or mischief and teasing, to get the resources he wants and needs. Case and point, when he makes a big coquettish show for mianmian, definitely not being "people pleasing" for her, but the group of girls around them all find it funny and cute and in the end she gives him a perfume sachet which ends up being a valuable resource for later. Or the time he outright tells Jiang Cheng that if you give the girls some lotus seeds they'll remember you and return the favour in the future. (Also notice how his interactions with girls seen as flirtatious are actually strategic resource-gathering acts.) These are the skills he has developed to meet his own needs. (THIS IS NOT A CHARACTER FLAW. I REPEAT.) He takes what he needs and steals from the Lotus Pier markets knowing it'll be paid for, he lives like he never know when his next windfall will come from so he'll take what he can when he can find it. Like Jiang Fengmian said, if there is no guarantee of a meal in the future then today's meal should still be enjoyed. It’s how Wei WuXian said to Nie Huaisang at Cloud Recesses, you have to find ways to make your own fun out of whatever you have. So he gets kicked out of class, goes fishing, gets alcohol, he pursues his own pleasure. He actually is quite insistent of his own agency and right to choose, he just can never directly say no.

And that little detail that Wei WuXian always tucks coins into his clothes just in case, that makes him able to buy food when he and Jiang Cheng are on the run... breaks my heart and reveals so much about the way Wei WuXian is constantly at work on ensuring his own survival and never takes for granted whether he is safe (he knows he never is). 

I've seen some people talking about Wei WuXian sacrificing so much for his brother and sister out of a need to be accepted out of a chronic sense of insecurity. But isn’t this just true? Doesn't he live in a world where being accepted is absolutely essential for survival? Doesn’t this whole story show the cruelty of a social system based on networks of hereditary/biological family that closes out and scapegoats any outsiders, and that without biological family connections that can enclose around you, you can never truly be safe if not constantly working to earn acceptance? (And then beautifully ends with the way a gay romantic relationship that queers marriage/family/etc disrupts all this and creates safety and inclusion for Wei WuXian without needing a normative family.) (AKA romantic love does not resolve some internal personal problem in Wei WuXian but disrupts and refuses and rebels against the problem of SOCIETY.) (*breathes heavily*)

And that’s why Lan WangJi is magnetizing to Wei WuXian. Lan WangJi is always saying no. Although what Lan WangJi sees in Wei WuXian is an exterior wildness, Wei WuXian is not really out of control so much as he is playing and caring and supplicating and showing off and pleasing people to get the resources and the acceptance he needs to live his life. He has firm values and desires that he can never outwardly state, only creatively spinning plates to distract and deflect while he refuses what goes against his values, protects who he cares for, or takes what he needs to in order to survive/thrive. Lan WangJi embodies an exterior of resoluteness and direct agency that Wei WuXian doesn't have the luxury of. And he's so drawn to him for his ability to repeatedly say no, to refuse to get along, or make others laugh, make other people happy, but just simply follow what he thinks is right.

Wei WuXian’s outward wild movement protects an inward stillness. He is an exterior of people-pleasing around an interior of refusal. He is an exterior of youthful rebellion around an interior of unflinching morality. He sees in Lan WangJi the outward expression of his stillness, his morality, his resistance that he can't express, that he's had to protect.

FYI after the cut gets more into the dynamics of consent in the story, and the last paragraph directly talks about consensual non-consent kink play in wangxian’s relationship.

When Wei WuXian is with Lan WangJi, there is no work to be done. Lan WangJi cannot be swayed by him, and so there's no point vying for resources or favors. Lan WangJi will either give him everything or refuse him everything based on who he is, it does not matter what Wei WuXian does and he can't do anything that will change Lan WangJi’s mind. Someone he literally can't win over. After the resurrection, they are often in an adorable tug of war, where Wei WuXian tries to take care of Lan WangJi, while Lan WangJi won't allow him to but demands to care of Wei WuXian right back. Actually, Lan WangJi insists that Wei WuXian take everything he wants or needs from him and is even angry when he doesn't take or when Wei WuXian tries to offer a gesture in return, even something as simple as a thank you Lan WangJi won't accept. It’s kind of adorable how frustrated Wei WuXian is in doing this thing he's learned that he needs to do, and just... so confused by Lan WangJi, and has to find a way to please this person who aggressively refuses to be pleased and is ONLY pleased by Wei WuXian being pleased.

(Not to mention the way Wei WuXian delights in finding that Lan WangJi can’t say what he wants, and they have sort of these chaotic cohesive both-being-so-pleased-by-working-hard-to-please each-other moments where Wei WuXian is letting Lan WangJi please him by finding out what pleases Lan WangJi and giving it to him.)

The wildness Lan WangJi had always hidden within himself is something he sees as just as dangerous as Wei WuXian thinks of his desire to refuse. He saw his mother be socially alienated, shunned, and eventually die because of her wildness. His ability to survive in the world, aka to be accepted by his family, is contingent on him being able to control this inner wildness. From a young age (re: Phoenix Mountain kiss) he could only understand his sexual desires for Wei WuXian as something repulsive or dangerous that had to be repressed and controlled, and that the only way he could imagine his desires as possible was as non-consensual. His secret gay desires were never available to him as anything but something monstrous.

Importantly, it’s not like everyone else other than Lan WangJi are all vampires cruelly demanding Wei WuXian’s constant sacrifice. Wei WuXian is always vibrantly, charismatically offering so much, before anyone has asked. It’s Wei WuXian who creates this kind of relationship for himself again and again. It’s Lan WangJi who simply refuses - he refuses to charmed, to be cared for. And so in the end Lan WangJi becomes the one person who Wei WuXian feels doesn't need anything from him. When he says he's eating the corpse's fruit to save Lan WangJi money and Lan WangJi says that will never be necessary. Or when Wei WuXian asks what toy he should win for Lan WangJi at the market game, and Lan WangJi says anything Wei WuXian gets will be the one he wants. (XD stahhhhp it’s too sweet !!!) He really just wants Wei WuXian to be, to exist, to spend his life discovering his own desires and allow Lan WangJi to help satisfy them, he doesn't want anything from Wei WuXian other than him living - happy and safe.

It takes someone like Lan WangJi to refuse Wei WuXian’s aggressive generosity, it’s definitely not an easy thing to say no to Wei WuXian, dazzling or annoying people so chaotically before they even realize there’s something to say no to. The sacrifice he gives to Jiang Cheng, he never even offers a choice - and perhaps it would have been too much for Jiang Cheng to accept if he had the chance.

Lan WangJi’s statement "Between us there is no need for thank you and sorry" seems like one of the most important sentences in the novel, and you can’t help but noticed the way “sorry” and “thank you” is littered meaningfully through the book. What is owed, what the characters owe to each other, the give and take, touches every part of the story (down to wangxian's erotic explorations!).

When Jiang Cheng talks to Wei WuXian at the Guanyin temple he makes a lot of contradictory statements about what Wei WuXian owes, what he was given, what he took, what he (Wei WuXian still) is owed in return. Wei WuXian, according to Jiang Cheng, took everything from the Jiang clan, and paid them back with their deaths. The Jiang clan give him his life when they took him in, and he owed Jiang Cheng service for the rest of his life as the right hand to the sect leader, that’s what Wei WuXian had promised anyway. At the same time, Wei WuXian sacrificed everything (his golden core) to Jiang Cheng, by giving everything he was taking one more thing - Jiang Cheng’s right to even be angry at him. Jiang Cheng had taken everything from Wei WuXian. Everything that happened around Wei WuXian after could be said to be because of the loss of his golden core, which Jiang Cheng might be said to be responsible for. But he never asked for it, maybe he never would have wanted it. He wishes Wei WuXian told him, but Jiang Cheng never told Wei WuXian his golden core was melted while he was sacrificing himself to save Wei WuXian. He wants Wei wuxian to say sorry, but that makes him feel pathetic. And Jiang Cheng says sorry too. It’s a mess of paradoxes, and in the end somehow it seems like the scales are balanced in the most hollow, dismal way.

What is owed, what is given, what is taken ... Wei WuXian has never been part of a family. He has always had to say thank you and sorry for everything he's taken. Wei WuXian himself admits that he used "thank you" as a way to enforce distance between himself and Lan WangJi. Lan WangJi's point i think is that they belong to each other, Wei WuXian is his, and he is Wei WuXian's, unconditionally. The way that Jiang Cheng speaks of him in the Guanyin temple (admittedly I read a fan translation and this is very nuanced, related to slight variations of grammar), even when Jiang Cheng clearly is so broken by the loss of Wei WuXian from his life, he talks about Wei WuXian as an outsider. It is what MY family gave to YOU, never what you took from our family. But at one point Wei WuXian was part of their family - but he takes too much, and becomes an ex-disciple, not a brother. Wei WuXian’s inclusion as a Jiang was always conditional. 

Even when Wen Qing and Wen Ning leave him to go take the blame for qiongqing path they tell him "thank you and sorry", drawing a line between them and him, so he doesn’t even belong to these people who he sacrificed everything for. The way Wei WuXian acted when he was younger, he was always keenly aware of this - he always knew that he didn’t belong to anyone, no one is going to protect him unconditionally. And after first escaping the Burial Mounds, he is done pretending. When Lan WangJi warns him about what a demonic cultivation path will do to his heart, Wei WuXian replies: “After all, on the topic of how my heart is, what could other people know about it? Why should other people care about it?” He is done pleasing. Nothing has changed really, he still belongs to no one and is alone, but now he is angry about it, and instead of saying thank you and sorry he is going to become too powerful to be at anyone's mercy. And then we see in the story afterward what happens to people who don't say thank you and sorry.

The whole point I think is the impossibility of choice, the impossibility of consent in this society. If he didn't forgo the behaviour his social acceptance was conditional on, he wouldn't have survived the burial mounds. But once he becomes powerful enough to survive and get revenge on the Wens, he is socially outcast. Except he was already outcast from the beginning.

And so how do Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi find a way through all that to a life together where all their desires are possible, where Wei WuXian can say no while also being pleasing (safe) to others, and Lan WangJi can indulge in his wild desires while still being good? The answer is kinky sex!

It is kind of miraculous and beautiful how Wei WuXian finds a way to say no, while simultaneously pleasing Lan WangJi, giving pleasure, while taking it, saying no, and knowing his refusal is not just tolerated, but gives Lan WangJi pleasure, knowing Lan wangji and knowing the painful belief Lan WangJi holds within that his desires are unacceptable and unspeakable, and that Wei WuXian can take care of Lan Wangji in a secret little way and please him and give everything to him by craving this wildness in Lan WangJi while at the same time he gets to say no again and again , and it won't push Lan WangJi away, he can refuse everything while at the same time be totally pleasing and thus safe, and also for Lan WangJi, Wei WuXian's pleasure at saying "no" while still being held onto, that he genuinely wants to be fucked even while begging Lan WangJi to stop (and the many ways he does give his consent for this throughout, especially their first time), allows Lan WangJi the ecstatic feeling that this idea that his sexual desires are only possible through force are not just something his lover forgives him for but something his lover is SO turned on by, and that he has consent for his fantasies of non-consent, Wei WuXian has the same fantasies from the other side, he is doing what he is supposed to while doing what he shouldn't, and actually these monstrous feelings in him allow him to take care of Wei WuXian in a way that he needs - that they both need - and all these impulses that are so wrong with Wei WuXian become very right and a way to do good. And they are just both so perfect and perfect for each other and I love them and I am so happy for them to have a long kinky life together.

[awesomefringey]

Oh, tell me something I don't already know

We already knew these things, didn't we?

I really dont see anything new in this anonymous Words

The industry anon sent in more!

What stood out to me the most is the dilemma of no real change, no matter if you quietly leave the industry or you stay and speak up, because then you’re just being “difficult” and either way there are 100 more waiting to replace you and accepting the work conditions without hesitating.

My impression is that Louis and Harry both have decided to stay in the music industry (maybe because the Azoffs have been supportive) because they found many ways to proceed their subtle rebellion in the industry. (rbb/sbb gave everyone a little taste)

For both Louis and Harry launching their own labels is an act of emancipation and shows they understand where artists have “leeways” in their existing contracts.

For Harry to be flamboyant on stage, signaling and queer coding as much as he can, is rebellious and damn clever. They say he dresses up to go on stage? I say he doesn’t, instead he actually dresses up to go het stunting.

For Louis to “partner” with BMG as publisher and distributor, but not get signed as an artist to remain fully in charge of his next album, is rebellious and damn smart.

For Louis to create a free music festival without any visible sponsors and promoting it solely with his social media presence, is outrageous, rebellious and shows how much power he has.

For Louis to tease plans for his own music management company and proving he has a damn good eye spotting talent, is a huge act of emancipation, it proves he doesn’t want to depend on his solo artist career only and he could make a change in the music industry in the UK.

For Harry to go into acting, is a similar act of emancipation from being a musician only. It takes a lot of pressure off of him in that regards.

There are so many examples where I see Louis and Harry represent the same values and fight the same battle at different ends, but definitely towards each other. It’s subtle, yet damn loud.