#decided to go for a simpler style :3

[familyvideostevie]

a kind of hunger | chapter 1

joel miller x fem!reader

series masterlist

joel miller walks into your life just as it starts to fall apart. surely some hot nights with the bar's newest regular can't hurt, right?

length: 9.2k

warnings: 18+, mdni, smut, fem!reader, unspecified age gap, fingering, oral (m and f receiving), doggy style, missionary, slightly painful sex, dirty talk, size kink if you squint, joel is a liiiiiiiitle mean if you squint, general feelings of loneliness and angst from r in her free time

a/n: huge thank you to @strangerfreaks without whom this would never have gotten off the ground. also to all the joel writers on this site, i love you, i am in awe of you. please allow me to give it a go myself <3

navigation | 𝗺𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 | 𝗴𝘂𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀

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The first time you sleep with Joel Miller you know it won't be the last. 

But that's not where this story starts. 

It starts in a bar. Nothing special about it, really. Staffed half by college kids who come and go, half by drifters who, for some reason, stopped drifting once they found this dimly lit, sticky-floored hole in the wall. Not quite a local institution but not forgettable, never totally empty. It's got pool tables and a jukebox but also clean bathrooms aside from the graffiti and two new-ish TVs showing whatever the first guy who gets there wants to watch.

Point is, you work there. One of those drifters who stopped drifting. The guy who owns it, some crotchety old fuck called Bill, rents you the apartment above the bar for a decent price considering it's loud until 2am on the weekends and midnight all the other days. Loud enough that even on nights you don't work it feels like you're there anyway. But you get used to it. It's called Frank's, which you don't totally understand, but you're not about to ask questions of the guy who has finally allowed you to slow down and take a breath who is also your boss and landlord.

You've worked there long enough to have learned the names and orders of all the regulars who've been coming in since long before you walked through the door and to have seen some new regulars enter the rotation. In truth, you've worked there long enough to basically be running the place. It's still the bar in your head, not your bar because getting attached will do you no good. This is how it always goes: you care too much but it never seems like anyone cares back. You cut and run before you can be disappointed and you’ve already been here longer than you’d expected to be because it’s something close to comfortable. 

Almost no one messes with you despite being younger than most of the clientele and on the off chance some frat boy from the city decides to take a cheap shot you've got a small army of imposing customers on your side. Between them and your coworkers, it's almost like you're not alone. 

Almost.

The hours you spend away from the bar are spent alone. You don't have many numbers in your phone and the ones you do you don't call. You go on drives in the shitty truck you bought off some guy when you moved here. You browse used bookstores and suffer the heat of the day on long walks and wonder if this is all there is. You think of what it might be like to feel something other than rootless.

One thing that helps is…sex. Being close to someone for even a little while, letting yourself be seen in a way that doesn’t require you to totally show your hand. You try not to make a habit of actually fucking your clientele. It can get messy quickly, guys coming in and expecting more than a good pour. Being offended when you don't give them a free round, don't make eyes at them over the oiled wood. It's easier to be alone, that much you've learned. It's easier and it's simpler and it means you've only got yourself to blame for the hurt you sometimes feel laying in bed, staring at the ceiling as some rock song thrums up through the floor. 

And if you do fuck someone from the bar, you keep it simple. You do, however, try really hard not to sleep with regulars. And no staying over. A classic, unspoken rule of sleeping with strangers that you rarely verbalize but make sure to enforce every time. It keeps things neat. The last thing you need is mess. Who knows how long you'll stay in this town, in this little apartment and this shitty bar. You've got a lot of years left, a lot of years you should probably spend in classrooms or an office or falling in love with some nice guy with a nice family who can give you a nice life. 

But you're here. 

And then, one day, so is Joel.

Being a good bartender is memorization, paying attention, and keeping a level head. You know how to make pretty much any drink even though your regulars are mostly the simple beer or Jack and Coke kind of people. You swear you can tell when a glass is going to fall a second before it shatters, spot a punch before it can be thrown. So you notice when a man you've never seen before walks through the door.

You notice how the energy of the room changes, how multiple pairs of eyes follow him as he settles at the end of the half-full bar. Dark hair shot through with grey, green shirt rolled up over chorded forearms that he rests on the wood. It feels like you should know him but you don't. You've never seen him before.

You finish pouring beers for some giggly girls before making your way over to him. His eyes track you.

You wonder what he'll order. A shot, maybe, based on the tense line of his shoulders. Or a dark beer. Maybe something strong. You hope he won't be one of those guys you have to peel off the bar in a few hours. "Can I get you something?"

"Whiskey, rocks," he says. You can hear the Texas drawl even from so few words. Deep, low, measured. "Cheapest you got."

For some reason, it feels like he's returning and you're the new one. "Wanna start a tab?"

"I'll do cash at the end," he says. Ah, one of those. Guy getting away from his wife, maybe. Tough day at work. Doesn't want to leave tracks. You can relate to that.

"Joel fuckin’ Miller," one of your regulars says as you turn to grab a glass. He claps the man -- Joel -- on the shoulder. "Heard you were back up this way," he says. "Good to see you, man."

Joel simply inclines his head once like he's not thrilled to be recognized. The dismissal is clear. And, weirdest of all, it works. You've seen insults hurled between friends for less.

You set his drink down, the amber liquid sloshing around the ice. 

"Thanks," he mutters. The dismissal is...less clear, but you've got other customers to tend to. And Joel doesn't seem particularly chatty.

Your eyes return to him for the next hour or so but he never waves you over for another round. Heat trails up and down your spine and you have to tell yourself that he's not watching you. That would be too optimistic, right? At one point you take a bathroom break and when you're back he's gone, wrinkled bills stacked under the glass. Enough for his drink and a decent tip. 

Joel comes in three more times over the next month before you sleep with him. Each time he orders the same drink, leaves the same tip. He sits alone at the bar, occasionally saying hello when someone approaches but no one ever sits next to him. He's gruff but only ever polite to you, doesn't get impatient when it takes you a minute to get to him. 

And he's really something to look at. The tick in his jaw, the veins in his neck. His skin is tanned, dotted with small scars that must come from a lifetime of hard work. He wears a watch and jeans that hug his ass in an almost indecent way, a way that has you watching him when he's not on a stool. Sometimes you catch him smirking to himself when there's some shit going on at the bar, gossip or people being loud for no reason. You wonder what his laugh sounds like and scold yourself for it. No harm in looking but there's the possibility of harm in thinking too much. You know better.

The third time he comes in is a bad night. It's busy for some reason and everyone is a fucking asshole. You weren't even supposed to work tonight but one of the seasonal kids had banged on your door begging you to come help, promising you all the tips for tonight if you did. You knew it would make you look good to Bill and despite yourself, you didn’t want to leave them hanging, so here you are, sweaty and pissed and smelling like beer, doing your best to empty the dishwasher in between drink orders and praying the keg doesn't need changing. 

You don't even notice when Joel comes in, only spotting him once he's managed to scare some college kid from a seat at the bar. For some reason, his presence makes you a little calmer in the chaos. 

"Be with you in a sec, Joel," you say to him when you're near. You don't call him by his name since he never actually introduced himself to you but it slips out in the rush. His nostrils flare but you don't have time to linger on it even as you feel the hot weight of his gaze. 

"No rush."

You manage to get him what you know by now to be his usual only to be called over by your least favorite customer of the night as soon as he's thanked you. 

"Honey," the asshole says. This fucker's name is Seth and he's a pain in your ass. "Gimme another, will you? Make it a heavy pour." This would be his fifth and he's already slurring his words. 

"Don't think so," you tell him firmly. "I'm cutting you off for tonight, Seth." He's liable to start some shit or at the very least throw up on the floor and you don't want to deal with either. You don't have time to deal with either. 

His bloodshot eyes narrow and he slams a fist on the bar. You manage not to flinch, though pretty much everyone else does. "That's not good fucking service, sweetcheeks," he leers. 

"Good thing I don't give a fuck," you snap. "Get the fuck out of here before you do something you regret, sweetcheeks.” The venom in your tone seems to surprise him before sheer rage takes over. You've thrown out plenty of assholes in your time here but it's not always a smooth experience.

Seth leans forward over the bar, reaches for you -- to do what, you have no idea -- and you prepare yourself to yell for backup and then kick him out for good and maybe get a punch in as he goes. His fingers manage to hook in your shirtsleeve before a hand closes around his wrist.

Before Seth can scream he's got his outstretched arm behind his back, face twisted in pain. Behind him is --

Joel?

The bar is almost silent. You can hear a few whispers over the blood pumping in your ears. 

"I'd get out of here if I were you," Joel hisses. He glances at you, jaw tight and eyes narrowed. Are you okay? he seems to be asking. You nod. 

Seth whimpers. "Let me go," he says weakly. 

"Just gonna show you the door." Joel all but drags him through the parting crowd. 

"Jesus," someone says behind you. One of the seasonal kids. "You okay?"

"I'm taking my break." You leave the kid behind the bar to fend for himself and barrel into the back and through the side door into the alley where you always take your 15. It's one of those weird cold fall nights, just the wrong side of chilly to be here without a jacket but you left it in the bar office.

The milk carton you sit on has been turned over so you kick it back with a thud and slump down onto it. The light above the door flickers. "This shit is getting old," you say to no one. You kick aside cigarette butts that aren't yours and wonder how long you can do this. What would be next, anyway? You've got a laundry list of failed dreams and no one wondering if you're going to make something of yourself. Long nights at a bar you care about more than you should and rowdy customers and handsome men who barely say a word to you can't last forever, can it? Would anyone here even notice if you left?

The door flies open, startling you out of your thoughts. 

Joel steps into the alley. Somehow he manages to yet again look like he was meant to be here and you're the one who is out of place. You blink at him and he stares back like he wasn't sure he'd find you here.

"Got lost?" you ask. "Pretty sure you know where the front door is."

He lets the metal door swing shut and crosses his arms. "Was lookin' for you."

That catches you by surprise. "Why?"

Joel shrugs, a small lift of his shoulders. His expression doesn't budge. "Sorry for makin' trouble."

Oh, right. Seth. You wave him off. "Just another night," you say. "I'd have handled it." You stand from the crate and lean against the brick wall. It's true. Seth isn't the first asshole you've handled.

"I bet you would've," Joel mutters. He takes one step closer. You're reminded all at once how good-looking he is, how you've wondered what his hands would feel like on your skin. There's no way he's ever thought of you, right? You're just some girl who pours him drinks, too young and too forgettable. He was just having a man moment, wanting to save the day or some shit like that. 

"I don't have a cigarette or anything if you want to smoke," you say. This close he doesn't smell like tobacco but you don't know what else to say. "Sorry."

"So you just sit in alleys on your break for fun?"

"I like this alley," you say, suddenly a bit defensive. "It's a nice alley." You take a step towards him. He uncrosses his arms and his hands flex at his sides. You shiver. "No one bothers me out here."

Joel tilts his head to the side. "That so?" His eyes are dark under the dim light. When did he get so close? When did your face get so hot?

"Except guys who drink whiskey on the rocks, I guess," you say. It comes out much softer than you'd like, your voice cracking. The air doesn't have the same bite as it did seconds ago. Joel's expression hovers between something you recognize and something you don't, something you desperately want to figure out. "Good thing I don't mind." The adrenaline from the small altercation hasn't left and the swirl of emotions about your whole shitty life has you on edge, has you wanting to play with fire.

You're so close now that you can feel his breath on your face, feel the heat of him in the still night. Joel's eyes rake over your face, looking for something, something you try very hard to show him so that he might fucking do it, meet the want that is suddenly uncontrollable halfway, or at least tell you if he's not interested so you can --

Your name is a groan in his throat and then he's kissing you. His palm cups the back of your head as he presses you into the wall, his other hand firm on your hip, fingertips pressing into your skin through your shirt hard enough to bruise. He tastes like the whiskey you served him. You fist one hand in his collar and wind the other into his hair.

Joel controls the kiss but you give as good as you get. He licks into your mouth and you suck on his lower lip. His beard rubs against your face in a delicious burn and when you tug on his hair he makes a noise you must hear again. The brick behind you scrapes a bit but you hardly notice when he presses against you, slides a thigh between your legs and you feel him hard through his jeans. 

"S'not right, you lookin' so good yellin' at that asshole," he grumbles into your neck, teeth nipping at your pulse. You cant your hips and he hisses.

"Speak for yourself," you manage. "Always got your eyes on me, don't you?" It feels like a risk to call him on it. Control of the situation is slipping from your grasp, this man who you never thought would actually touch you now holding you in his arms, his lips on your skin. He pulls back from your neck and smirks, eyes dark. 

"'Spose I do." 

You can work with that. You surge forward to kiss him again and this time he lets you call the shots while still meeting your bruising caresses with his own.

"Joel." You tug on his hair.

He makes that noise again.

It might be five minutes, it might be an hour. You have no idea. All you know is you can still feel his cock through the denim and you're so turned on you might combust in this alley. Or at the very least let him fuck you in it.

"I don't close tonight," you pant. One of Joel's hands has worked its way into your back pocket and the other has rucked up your shirt to rest on your bare back. 

"What?" he growls.

"My shift. I'm off at 11." You tap his watch. He glances at it and sees it read 10:30. "Half hour. I live upstairs."

For a second you think he'll say no. Walk away with a nod of his head and out of your life forever. Wouldn't be the first, wouldn't be the last. You're already breaking one of your rules by even considering sleeping with him but there's just something about him. The way he looks at you, the way his hands feel on your skin. You want to know what he'll feel like inside you. Maybe you’re still in this town because you were waiting for him to walk through the door.

"Alright," he says. He clears his throat and releases you. You fuss with your hair and straighten your shirt and he adjusts himself in his jeans. "Half hour." His dark eyes narrow as he glances down the alley back towards the street. 

"Take a walk around the block or something," you tell him, swallowing the urge to laugh at him so handsome and disheveled from your hands. Never in a million years would you have predicted that tonight would go this way. "My door is on the other side of the building. I'll let you up."

The urge to flatten the damage your hands did to his hair is so overwhelming for a second that you step away from him towards the door. His eyes follow you, expression unreadable. How many nights would it take for you to know what he's thinking? Careful, you think, or you'll be tempted to find out. 

Joel watches you until you give him a little wave and slip back into the bar. The metal door clangs shut behind you and you lean against it, knees still wobbly. Is this actually happening? Are you really this overwhelmed by making out with some guy in an alley? You check the clock on the wall and curse. Your break ended ten minutes ago though since no one came looking for you it's probably no big deal. Being mostly in charge has its perks.

The bar is a little less crowded than when you left so you grab a rag and start wiping down the bar. Joel's seat is empty, his glass gone. 

"Oh, hey," the seasonal kid says. "That guy, uh, Joel? He said to make sure you get this." He pulls out Joel's usual tip from his apron and holds it out to you.

Considering you're planning to go upstairs and fuck him until you can't walk, you don't feel like taking his tip tonight. "It's yours," you say. "Thanks for handling everything while I was out back." The kid blinks at you but knows better than to refuse, pocketing the cash and going back to loading the dishwasher. 

You finish your shift. Your blood feels electric, your skin hot. Can anyone in this bar tell what happened in the alley? You haven't felt this way about a hookup in ages. Like you were wanted, not just convenient. It's just one night, right? Maybe he'll never come to the bar again, which makes your chest tighten for a second. Maybe you're about to ruin something you don't totally understand. But you haven't gotten this far in life by worrying about shit like that, so you clock out and wave goodbye and make your way to the other side of the building. 

Joel isn't there. You unlock the door to the stairwell so you can at least wait for him inside when you hear footsteps, the crunch of gravel under boots. You fist your key between your knuckles just in case but before you can turn around you hear your name in that Texas drawl. 

"Just me," he says. You don't know if Joel Miller is capable of looking nervous but this is probably close. He shifts from one foot to the other, hands in his pockets. A thrill runs up your spine. Are you really doing this? Are you really about to bring this man up to your apartment and hope to god he does whatever you want to you? 

"Come on up." Yes. Yes, you are. You give him a smile and he follows you up to the landing. 

"S'loud," he mutters once you shut the door. The bar's music wasn't that loud when you were in it and up here it's a dull hum, people's voices and laughter slipping through the cracks like a TV left on a little too high in the other room. These days it's background noise to you but you figure Joel lives in a house somewhere with lots of land and open windows and silence. He seems like the type to like silence. 

Jacket on the hook, shoes clumsily thrown on the mat, keys in the dish. Your normal routine except there’s a man in your living room, too. He looks around the space, hands still in his pockets. You try not to be self-conscious about your place. It's small, sure, the bedroom visible through the currently open French doors in the small living room. Your kitchen is tiny, bathroom tinier, but it's all yours. "You get used to it," you say. "I hardly mind it anymore."

"Didn't say I did," he says. You both stand there for a few moments before Joel takes two big steps and crowds you against the door, one hand on your hip and the other next to your head. "Means they won't hear us." You swallow a gasp as he drags his nose along the curve of your jaw, breath hot on your skin. You were going to ask him if you could shower first since you undoubtedly smell like sweat and beer but clearly, he doesn't mind. His tongue darts out and he sucks on your pulse point, your own hands clutching desperately at his shirt. If he moves you're sure you'll melt into a puddle on the floor. "Means you can be as loud as you want," he growls. "That sound good?"

Any breath remaining in your body rushes out and you jerk your hips to make contact with the hardness in his jeans. "Yeah," you gasp. You can feel something like a smile against your neck. "That sounds good."

It's a dynamic you don't mind stepping into -- whatever this is. Every second of your life you feel like you're waiting for the other shoe to drop, for everyone around you to get tired. Your eyes are always on the exit, always wondering where you'll go next, what you'll leave behind this time. Even when you're fucking strangers you're always wondering how you'll get them to leave. You’re better off alone. But right here, right now, with Joel's heavy scent of sawdust and whiskey and something earthy, something grounding, in your nostrils, his hands and his mouth on you, nothing else matters. Your brain shuts off and you're just here.

You grab Joel's jaw and guide his lips back to yours. He allows it and you moan deep in your throat as he tongues back into your mouth, your own trying to give as good as you're getting. He pops the button on your jeans and you help him with frantic hands, shoving them down your hips along with your underwear so he can ghost his fingers through your coarse curls. He pulls back from the kiss to watch as he drags two fingers through your folds. Your eyes lock and he smirks as your lids flutter.

"Soaked," is all he says. You tip your head forward and rest your forehead on his shoulder.

"Don't be smug."

He huffs. "I ain't trying to sound like an asshole, but --"

"Already failed." He nips at your earlobe.

"Gotta work you open a bit, sweetheart," he says. His fingers circle your clit once, ever so slowly. Your grip on his bicep tightens and you wonder if you'll leave bruises. You hope so. "Gonna be a tight fit."

"Heard -- fuck -- that before," you gasp. Joel really fucking knows what he's doing. "I -- bed?"

"Smart girl," he says. You're pretty sure you get wetter. He pulls his fingers free but keeps a hold on your hip like he knows your knees are jelly. "Sit on the edge." 

You leave your jeans and underwear behind and make your way to the bed through the French doors, sitting heavily on the quilt, knees bent and leaning on your hands behind you. Before you can say another word, Joel lowers to his knees between yours. He pries them apart even further and runs his hands up and down your thighs. 

For a few seconds, you can't find the words. This man, older than you and impossibly handsome, face lined with years he's lived and hands callused with work he's done, this man that you hardly know anything about but can't get out of your mind, is on his knees before you.

"You gonna be okay down there?" is what you come up with.

"You always talk this much?" he mutters, though his mouth tugs up at the corner. Joel's forearms wrap around your legs and he tugs. You fall flat on your back in surprise and your ass almost hangs off the bed. He draws one of your legs over his shoulder and kneads the flesh of your thigh, eyes dark and jaw twitching as he spreads you open and just looks. "Might have to help me up but I think I'll be just fine."

"Joel --" 

The end of his name becomes a high-pitched moan when he leans in and buries his face in your cunt. He drags his tongue up and down through your folds, nose catching your clit in a way that makes you squirm. His beard scrapes against your skin deliciously, leaving a sting that you know you'll be able to see evidence of when he's done. He laps at you before finally taking your clit in his mouth and sucking like his life depends on it. It's only his hand on your outstretched thigh keeping you from suffocating him between your legs, though you're not sure he'd mind.

"Should be a crime," he says. You look down the length of your body at him. His chin is wet with you, eyes meeting yours when he feels your stare. "Cunt this pretty tastin' so good."

How do you reply to that?

He's back at it before you can even try. Joel gets messy with it, the sounds of his attention loud and filthy. He tells you how wet you are, how good you taste, and your eyes flutter shut again.

"How're we doing?" 

"Don't stop," you manage. "Just, don't stop--"

He prods your entrance with one finger. "Reckon you can take it, hmm? You're so wet it'll be easy." There's a bite to his tone, a sense of amusement mixed with awe like he can hardly believe it either. 

"Two," you gasp. "I can take two." You need two, in fact. His hands are one of the few parts of him you've been able to study and you know his fingers are long, much thicker than yours and you need them to fill you up, need them to stretch you out. You need something to clench around because right now you feel like you're on the edge of the pleasure building in your core and if you don't get a release soon you'll just…just…combust. 

Joel hums but you feel a second finger nudge into you. He slides them in and curls them as he goes. Your back arches off the bed.

"Dunno," he coos. "Pretty tight, sweetheart." The slight meanness to his words is in complete contrast with the gentle, attentive way he handles you. Who knew he'd be such a fucking tease.

"Well get to work, then." He scissors the digits inside of you in reply and returns to sucking on your clit. You reach down and bury your hand in his silver-streaked hair, tugging a bit harder than you intend to. Joel just moans into your cunt, the vibration making it feel like your very pelvis is rattling as he continues to fuck you with his fingers. 

Sweat beads on your brow as you try to hold on. He picks up the pace and presses into your walls with his fingertips like he's looking for something. His tongue wreaks havoc on the rest of you, sucking bruises into your inner thighs when he's not abusing your clit. If this is just the foreplay you don't know how you'll survive actually fucking him. And he hasn't even asked you to touch him, hasn't shown even a hint of expectation. He's doing this to get you ready but based on the blown state of his pupils he's enjoying it almost as much as you are. 

"Getting close?" he asks, breath ragged. Your skin is starting to feel deliciously raw from his beard and the hook in your belly is pulling tighter and tighter. 

"Yes -- fuck -- I'm close, Joel, keep --"

His hand moves faster than before and he latches back onto your clit. Your legs start to shake and you feel your orgasm coming, it's just right there, you just need him to --

His fingers find the spot he must have been looking for and your only warning is a sharp tug on his hair and then your back arches and you come all over his face. He fingers fucks you through it and you feel it as your walls clench around him, your mouth open in a high whine as your muscles finally relax and you flop back onto the bed. Joel keeps his face in your cunt, gently lapping at your release while avoiding your sensitive clit. You push his hair back from his face and try to get your breathing under control.

He manages to get up on his own with a grunt as you pant on the bed. "Okay?" he asks. "Lookin' a little tired." You show him your middle finger and he...laughs, lips shiny with your slick. So he can laugh. 

"Are you going to keep your clothes on?" you ask him. His eyes travel slowly over your bare bottom half, the redness of your thighs from his beard and the way your shirt has rucked up to the wire of your bra. 

"Nah." He sits heavily on the edge of the bed to take off his boots and socks. You want to ask him if you can undress him, slowly peel off his layers button by button and explore every inch of him but you won't be able to take it if he says no so you just watch. Already you know you'll be thinking about this night for a long fucking time. The way it seems like he cares about how you're feeling, how he wants to take his time with you, how he enjoys your pleasure. It's nice. It's...making you feel wanted.

His denim button-up is tossed on the floor and he stands, shirtless, to undo his belt. The forearms and small triangle at his throat that you've been treated with thus far when he sits at the bar in no way prepared you for the rest of him. Broad shoulders, thick, muscled arms from years of hard work. Graying chest hair that travels all the way down the slight softness of his belly and in a darker trail his jeans. Your mouth waters. 

"You're starin'," he says softly before unzipping his fly and pushing his jeans and boxers down in one motion. 

"Taste of your own medicine." The words come out with much less bite than you intended as his cock springs free. 

Well, he wasn't lying. He is big. You knew he would be based on what you felt through his pants, but seeing it is something else. 

You sit up and scoot to the end of the bed to be closer. Is he really going to fit? He's bigger than anyone you've fucked before, that's for sure. A ruddy color, a little darker than his tanned chest, the tip a little lighter and already leaking. A few veins run the length of him and the hair at the base of his shaft is clearly taken care of though a little wild and a shade of deep brown that hasn't grayed much yet. His balls hang heavy, one slightly bigger than the other. He twitches under your gaze. You look up at him and wait for him to call out your staring again but instead, he's just watching you, pupils blown. 

"You are...so beautiful," you breathe. He makes a dismissive noise but a flush travels up his chest and to his face. It's true. There's something about him that makes you think you could look every second for the rest of your life and not get enough.

"Should be sayin' that to you." He strokes himself once and you lick your lips. "You got a condom? Should be one in my pocket if you don't." Does he always carry one? Or did he hope to get lucky with you, just like you've been thinking about him?

"Bedside table drawer." He goes for it and you remember too late that the drawer has...other things in it, too. His eyebrows raise and he eyes your small collection of toys but says nothing, though his cock twitches again. If you asked, would he use them on you? He seems like the type to be into that. But right now you need him inside you so badly you might combust.

"Can I?" He pauses before handing the foil square to you. You take him in hand and stroke him from root to tip. He makes a noise low in his throat and you lean in to trace the vein along the bottom of his shaft with your tongue. His hips twitch forward just a bit like he's trying to keep control and failing. You know the feeling. He's warm and heavy on your tongue and the slightest bit salty. You kind of lose the plot for a second, thoughts of him fucking you fading with the desire to make him feel good like this, to blow him until he's moaning your name like you were moaning his.

Joel slides his fingers into your hair and you manage to take him about halfway before he tugs gently. "I'm not complainin'," he says, voice tight. "'Specially when you look so damn pretty like this. But I've been hard as a fuckin' rock for an hour and I ain't as young as I used to be, so..." He trails off.

You place a dainty kiss on his tip and pat his hip. "Another time," you say, realizing too late what you've implied, but Joel just smirks. You tear open the foil and slide the condom on as gingerly as you can but he still hisses your name like he's scolding you, that hand in your hair pulling once again just a little. You feel the arousal pooling in your gut, sticky between your thighs. 

He tugs on the collar of your shirt. "Off," he says. You're quick to obey, whipping it to a corner of your apartment along with your bra. Joel just looks for a second before reaching a calloused hand to palm one breast, thumb sliding over your nipple. "Look at you," he says, breathy, with a squeeze. "Christ."

"You gonna fuck me, Joel Miller?" You blink up at him. He swallows visibly, throat bobbing before that smirk is back. 

"Only ‘cause you asked so nicely." 

You scramble back up the bed on your hands and knees, leaning down on your elbows and presenting him with your bare cunt. "Cause I'm such a lady."

"That so?" he murmurs. He drags his fingers through your folds slowly, brows furrowed. You fist your hands in the sheets. "You want it like this?" he asks. He palms your hip, traces the curve of your ass and presses his fingertips into your skin. You wiggle at him a little. Most guys you hook up with want it like this. You don't mind being fucked from behind, don't mind being able to close your eyes with your face shoved in the sheets and just feel. God knows with a dick his size you'll be feeling it regardless of the position you're in. But part of you does want to look at Joel, to watch him, his expression, his handsome, rugged face. Feel his arms around you, feel the warmth of his breath on your lips as he fucks you. See what his eyes look like when he comes. But this is enough.

"Do I need to say please?"

The head of his cock presses against your entrance in reply. You crane your neck to see as much of him as you can. He's focused on your ass with a light frown, hands resting on your hips.

"Gonna go slow," he grumbles. His gaze meets yours. "For my benefit as much as yours."

Words don't come. You're breathless and dripping, desperate for him to just get on with it. 

"Joel, are you gonna just stand there --"

He slowly, torturously slowly, starts to slide into you. The stretch is immediate, has you face down in the sheets, eyes fluttering. Each inch of painful stretch fades quickly to throbbing pleasure, a fullness that has you keening. 

You press your hips back into him but his fingers grip tighter, holding you in place. "What did I say?" he grits out. 

"Feels so good, so big," you babble. There's nothing left in your brain, your body, but this. But Joel. You have to have all of him. "I can take it, I can take your cock, I --"

"Got quite the mouth on you, huh?" he says. He keeps pressing into you, filling you up inch by inch. "Okay?" he pants. "Look at me, tell me it feels good --"

You crane your neck again, tears gathering at the corner of your eyes and look at him. His own are lidded, mouth open in an "o" like he can hardly believe it himself. A flush runs down his chest and if you didn't know better you'd say he's trembling.

"Yes, I -- god, Joel, keep going, please --"

"Doin' good, sweetheart," he coos. His hand strokes up and down your spine. "Almost there. Almost takin' all of me."

He bottoms out and you see stars. You feel lips on your back, the warm puffs of his breath on your skin as he waits for you. It's a fine line between pain and pleasure and you're walking the tightrope but the stretch is delicious. You can feel every inch of him. Your heartbeat is loud in your ears and you shift your hips a little, loving it when Joel moans.

"Alright," you manage. "Move, please." His fingertips are back on your hips and give you a squeeze before he starts to drag his cock out of you. The tip of him catches the spot inside of you that makes your back arch as he pulls out and then again when he thrusts in. 

"All that work, my fingers and my tongue and you're still so fuckin' tight. Christ."

The only thing you manage to say is a litany of his name.

"Lemme hear it, baby," he grinds out. Baby. "Be so loud those fuckers downstairs hear you--"

You meet his thrusts as best you can and even though it feels so good, even though you're so full, it's not bringing you to the edge like you need. Your neck is starting to hurt from the way you're twisting to see him, your fingers gripping the sheets as hard as you can because you want to be touching him instead. But this is good, this works, maybe if you touch your clit, you'll --

You reach between your legs and Joel pulls out. You get off your elbows and turn around, almost gasping at the loss of him. "Is something wrong?"

He's frowning at you. "Should be askin' you that."

You don't know what to say. Your cunt throbs a little from being empty, the ache settling in now that he's not there to literally fuck it away. "What?"

"You stopped makin' those noises," he says softly. “The ones you were makin’ before.” You turn around and sit facing him, suddenly a little self-conscious. "Ain't gonna fuck you in a position you don't like."

"I --" You try to fight through the haze of your brain for words. "I liked it fine."

Joel waits. He just stands there at the edge of the bed and waits. 

"Maybe..." you try again. "Would on my back be okay for you?"

His eyebrows raise like he can't believe you'd think otherwise. "That'll work for me," he says slowly. "Grab a pillow." You shift back on the bed as he kneels on it, positioning himself between your legs. You hand him one of your pillows and he taps your hip. "Up." You obey and he slides it under you so your lower half is lifted a bit before he presses one leg to the side, spreading you open. He slowly bends the other so that your thigh is pressed against your torso in a deep stretch without being painful. You feel bare, exposed in a way he somehow hasn't yet achieved. 

Joel fixes his gaze on your face. "Let's try that." He strokes himself once and then leans over you, bracing himself on one hand near your head. He lines up to press his cock into you again. Faster than last time, you wince a little but you dig your fingertips into his back to tell him to keep going. He bottoms out and you immediately feel the difference, eyes fluttering shut. Before it was like he was plowing into you, like you were so full you could hardly handle it. But like this it's like he's melting into you, like there is no space between you anymore. You're full but it's not so harsh. You don’t know where you end and he begins.

"That better?" he croaks. You force yourself to look at him and find his face closer, closer than you thought he'd get, breath warm on your face. His forehead is beaded with sweat and his eyes search your face. This close you can see they’re grey, the lines at the corners deep with strain. Even like this, stuffed full of his cock, you could look at him all day.

"Move, Joel," you tell him. He takes that for a yes and starts at a punishing pace. You have no idea how he's kept it together this long, considering you've felt on the edge of another orgasm this entire time. You anchor your arms on his shoulders as his thrusts make you see stars. 

"Ask for what you want, you hear me?" His balls smack loudly against you and he presses his lips to your ear. "You ask and I'll do my damn best."

You don't know what it is -- the overwhelming sensation of his cock dragging in and out at this angle, how close he is, his words -- but you feel tears at the corners of your eyes again. You nod frantically, hands grasping for purchase on his back. 

"C'mon," Joel says. "Gotta use that mouth, sweetheart."

"Yes," you pant. "Yes, yes, Joel, yes --"

"Fuckin' perfect for me," he moans. His lips trail up your cheek, tongue catching your tears before he presses them to yours in a messy kiss that's more teeth and breath than anything else. 

"Joel, Joel, Joel --"

"Gonna come for me? Gonna soak my cock like you did my face?"

Your orgasm comes like the snap of a rubber band. You hold him as tight as you can as it washes through you, the waves almost painful as he keeps fucking you fast and hard, your name a series of broken sounds from his mouth until his hips stutter and he groans deep in his chest. You try to keep your eyes on him as you come down from your high and are rewarded with the scrunch of his brow and the slight part of his lips as he comes. Beautiful, you think. 

The room is all of sudden much quieter without the sounds of your fucking. It's just the dull sounds of Frank's through the floor and your combined panting as he pulls out of you and flops on the bed beside you. You wince this time, the soreness really settling in. Joel finds your hand and kisses the back of it in a move so unexpectedly tender you can't look at him, raw as you are already. The bed shifts and you figure he's throwing out the condom. 

"You okay?" he says. You open your eyes and find him standing at the edge, looking at you. He's holding your robe from the bathroom. You stretch and let him look. 

"Yeah," you reply. You give him a smile as you scoot to the edge and wrap yourself in it when he holds it out. "Thank you." Joel grunts. 

You go to the bathroom yourself to pee and see the damage. Hair a mess, your mascara gathered around your eyes like you've been working hard. You've got hickies forming on your neck and chest, the skin rubbed a bit raw from his beard around your mouth. You love how you look right now. 

You look like you got fucked well. And you did. 

But now you want a shower and a snack and to go to bed. 

You half expect Joel to be gone when you go back into the bedroom. You remember belatedly that you don't let hookups stay the night. Will he leave if you ask him to? If he's already left then you don't need to worry about it. A small part of you worries you won’t ask him to go.

Instead, he's sitting on the edge of your bed putting his boots on. His shirt is unbuttoned but other than that he's dressed. He looks up briefly. His own hair is going in a thousand different directions and if this wasn't a one-night stand you'd fix it for him, a hand pushing it back like you did when he was between your thighs. But things are different outside the heat of the moment. 

"You want some water or anything?" you ask instead.

He shakes his head and finishes his boot, stands and buttons his shirt. "Nah," he says. "Should just head out."

You wonder belatedly if there's anyone at home missing him. Maybe he's got a wife. Maybe he's got a life that he's running away from and into your arms. 

"Bar'll be closed by now, or as good as," you say. You spy his jacket by the door and bend to pick it up. "No one'll see you."

Joel's face does something funny that you don't quite know how to read. He takes his jacket from you and shrugs it on. "Alright," he says. 

He looks awkward in a way you didn't know he could so you throw him a line. "Thanks," you say. For fucking me. For listening to me. For making me feel good. "It was fun. See you around?"

His expression softens. He steps close and gently holds your chin with his thumb and forefinger before kissing you once, firmly but chastely compared to what you were doing before. 

"See you around," he says. And then he opens the door and disappears down the stairs. 

You hear the outer door close and only then do you let out a breath. Your entire body feels like you just spent hours at the gym. But your mind? It's going a thousand miles an hour. You don't know what to think about first -- how Joel looked, how he spoke to you, how his hands felt. How he implored you to ask for what you wanted, how he made you feel good because it made him feel good. How you desperately, desperately want to see him again, to know him in every possible way. How you want him to walk back up the stairs and hold you until you fall asleep.

And that's not how you expected to feel. It's not how you should feel after a one-night stand with a guy you serve a few times a week at your place of employment. Like he saw right to the core of you, like he gave you something you didn't know you needed. 

You need to get a hold of yourself. This is how it starts -- this is how you get hurt. You care. Well, you always care, but no one has to know that. You let someone care about you. Not that Joel does, but he could. 

But isn't that the one thing you want most of all? 

You sleep in the next day. There's not much that needs to be done at Frank's besides bookkeeping and inventory which doesn't take you long. When you finally make it downstairs, three Advil popped to ease the soreness of your entire body, you're surprised to find Bill himself sitting at the bar. 

He looks just as you remember, hair a little longer and a little grayer. Shit kickers and jeans, a hunting jacket and trucker hat. You'll bet his actual truck is parked around back where no one from the road can see it. 

"Uh, hi?" Bill hasn't come around for at least a year, which is making your stomach sink a little. The last time was when there was a fire because some dumbass tried to smoke inside and he wanted to make sure you weren't going to quit on him for having to throw water on the nasty curtains. 

"Heard about Seth," he says. Always right to the point, this guy. He's drinking what looks to be Coke with a lemon. "Sit." You do as he says. So much for bookkeeping.

"Yep," you say. You have no idea where he heard it and know better than to ask. "No big deal."

"I want to retire."

What? "Do you...work here?" Bill appreciates honesty and he's the kind of asshole that respects you if you're an asshole back. 

"No," he says. "But I own the fuckin' dump. And me and Frank want to retire."

"There's a Frank?"

"My partner, dumbass. Keep up."

You were already groggy and still muddled from last night but this is forcing you to bring everything into sharp focus. Bill wants to retire. Which means he wants to...

"So my options are to sell this dump or find someone to take it."

If he sells the bar you're shit out of luck. No way another owner would let you live upstairs the way you do for next to nothing and let you work here and run the show. This is...a lot to take in.

"Are you listening to me?" Bill says. You blink a few times. 

"No," you admit. "Can you say that again?"

He sighs. "Do you want it?"

"The bar?" you ask incredulously. 

"No, idiot, the dumpster out back. Yes, the bar." He raps his knuckles on the bar top. "You could keep everything the same. It's just paperwork, really. I'll just give it to you. God knows a young person like you could make it nicer, turn a better profit." He says it like it's an insult. 

"Are you fucking serious?" This goes against most every rule you've had for yourself for the last who knows how long. Don't get attached, keep moving. No one really needs you so you can disappear whenever. You haven't gotten bored yet, haven't gotten restless, but you know it'll happen. There's no way you can do this forever. But owning a bar? That would make you stay. You'd have no out. You’d have to let yourself be seen, let yourself be needed. You’d have to commit. You’d have to not fuck it up.

"Why not?" he shrugs. "I know you said it was temporary back when you moved in, but you practically run it."

He's right. Everything is temporary for you. But would sticking around be so bad? Would trying to actually make a life for yourself, have a home base, a thing you care about be the end of the world? And then there's Joel...No. Not going there. 

"I..."

"Either you take it or I shut it down." Bill gets off his stool and looks around. "No one cares enough about it to try to sell it."

"Then why me?"

"Do you care about it?" he asks. His piercing stare pins you to your stool, compels you to be honest with him where you're rarely honest with yourself. 

"Yeah," you say. "I do."

"Then there's you're fuckin' answer. I know you do. You clean the shit out of this place and train the seasonal dipshits and learn the names of the fuckin’ drunks and live upstairs and make this a good place for good people to come. You think no one notices, but I notice. We all notice." It's possibly the most words Bill has ever said to you in a row. 

"Can I...think about it?"

He shrugs. "Sure," he says. "Not too long, though. Gotta decide by the end of the year. Maybe earlier."

That gives you three months, give or take. To figure out what the fuck you're going to do.

With one conversation Bill has shattered your entire life here. Now there’s actually a timer on it, this little piece you’ve carved out and started to enjoy. Could you make it a real thing? Could you finally admit to yourself that this is what you want – to be wanted? To be needed? To have something that’s yours?

The bar door shuts and you realize Bill has left you alone with your thoughts. You shift in your stool and a wave of soreness rolls through you from your core. 

You thunk your forehead on the bar. “Fuck me,” you say to the empty room. 

thank you for reading <3 reblog, send feedback!

[spadesncrows]

hey fellas um

where the fuck did y’all come from /j

no joke I got a lil nervous when I saw the number rising……… I had zero clue what to do I’m rlly not used to having a following like this 😭😭

but in celebration of hitting 500, I’d like to do a couple of art requests for you guys ^^ For my own sanity I’m just gonna do a simpler art style, basically the one I use for chibis like these !!

I’ll do a max of 2 charas per request !! If you’d like to request, hit up the ol askbox from today up until august 10 !! Just make sure u have a picture ref if ur requesting any ocs :3

!! No more than 2 requests per person please !!

On a side note, to be honest, this blog was wholly made on a whim. A half assed effort to make some sort of space for me to show what I did best. I honestly remember the day I made it and how I told myself one thing in particular: that it was just to try it out and if I didn’t like it, I would just drop it and move on. But knowing the people I met through this blog is more than enough for me to keep going ^^

If any of my mutuals decided to keep reading, I just wanted to say that you guys are some of the biggest reasons why I want to keep going. I’ve never been the best when it comes to reaching out or talking or words in general so by extension I’m not really the best at conveying it but thank you guys. A lot.

ok. erm. sappy rant over. Cheers to me being the same loser artist on tumblr for the time to come :3

Also teehee funny cursed progress pic. bald vivi. vibald if you will /j

[zephyr-bazaar]

Hi hi @squiddlyn!! I was your gifter for the @bokumonoexchange!!

I was really excited to get you, I've actually reblogged some of your art on my main before!!! And your prompts REALLY got my creative juices flowing.

Yuri of ELISE of all characters HAS to be done in an 80s shoujo style. I spent... over 3 weeks of my almost even month of working for this exchange daily on this piece alone. This is... a major departure from my usual style, which made it quite the challenge! Soft and detailed is the antithesis of how I draw, so I... definitely had a time with this!

Overall I'm EXTREMELY happy with how this came out; minus the rose bushes (rip) it came out just about perfect to what I was imagining. I hope you love it too!

But that's not all...

You get another piece, too!!

I really, really couldn't decide which prompt to do. I had very vivid ideas for both pieces, so I was pleased to be able to do both! Especially when you posted your pieces and talked about Animal Parade, it made me that much more motivated to finish this one, too!

This one was also a major departure from my style, but a simpler one. DEFINITELY a good break after the other piece. It also came out how I imagined!

Overall I hope you enjoy! I am very excited to go back to my regular art style after these major diversions from it.

(I'll also DM you links to the pieces in full resolution!)

[yanxidarlings]

sorry to bother you but i’m obsessed with your writing style 😭 would you consider writing something where theodore nott and mattheo riddle fight over gender neutral/male reader? <3

YANDERE THEODORE NOTT VS YANDERE MATTHEO RIDDLE

take notes, aspiring requesters, this is what i like to see 💖😩✊ so i still should be prioritising the poll results, but this is way too tempting.

this turned out long as dumbledores beard so i might make a part 2 in the future with more details about the poly yanderationship. i tried out some actual scenes so please be honest if they were shit or not because i only want to embarrass myself once.

• ok, so, to put it shortly; the reader/darling is fucked. like. you couldn't have gotten a worse pair of yanderes. both are some of the worst at sharing (ok i know i say that for everyone, but listen). yet, it's not completely off the table.

• once they hop of their high horse and decide to come to an agreement, that's when the darling should be scared. two yandere's fighting is better than them getting along because at least they're distracting each other. and the agreement really only stands until a chance arises for one to eliminate the other. so unless the darling really likes them both, the hostility never ends, there's just a break in between.

to put it not shortly; i like the idea here that they've known each other since childhood, i saw a headcanon somewhere in the depths of wattpad that theo and theo have known each other since they were like 3 so i'm just gonna roll with it.

the darling had never suspected they would harbour such dark thoughts. sure, they once sent each other to st mungos 'play fighting' when they were 9, but that was just them rough housing. okay and there was that one time in 1st year transfiguration when mattheo turned theodore into a raccoon and said he didn't know how to turn him back. oh and that fist fight over who got to take the darling to the yule ball was kind of terrifying, if he hadn't pulled them off each other, they probably would have kept going until the other was dead...

• okay so the darling was getting pretty suspicious over time. not to mention, mattheo is pretty transparent about his actions, and belief that the reader is beholden to him in every way. and theodore makes to effort to hide his intentions of wedding the reader oneday.

• it didn't take long for mattheo and theodore to catch on to each other, especially if they shared a dorm with their darling, but either way, running into each other whilst stalking the reader down the halls and having to awkwardly sit next to each other whilst watching the reader sleep, quickly revealed the others obsession.

• theodore frankly is just offended that mattheo even thinks he's worthy of the reader. it's not official yet but theo is the one that's betrothed to the reader, theo is the one that met the reader first and most importantly, theodore is the darlings friend, not mattheo.

to set the scene, theodore has finally worked up the gall to sneak into the darlings dorm and watch as they sleep, something he'd been itching to do lately; they had been coming to class looking lethargic, eating less at meals, and just seemed out of it lately. he was just going to make sure they were sleeping well, that's all he meant, but when he quietly enters their dorm, none other than mattheo riddle sits on their bed, resting on his palms, creepily staring at theodore's precious darling as they slep.

"what the fuck are you doing" is his initial reaction. he probably shouldn't have said it so loud, as the reader stirred in his sleep. "get off him" he continued, in a whispered yell. the situation escalated pretty quickly, with theodore dragging mattheo off the bed, only to be met with a swift punch to the face.

"mind your own fucking business, nott" mattheo spat, "and get out" gesturing towards the door. if the reader hadn't started to slowly wake up at that moment, this story would have a much simpler ending.

no words were said as they returned to the slytherin dorm. theodore was woken up just hours later with a wand to his neck "if i ever catch you in l/n's dorm again, i'll end you." theodore didn't say anything at that moment, but in no way was he backing down.

• what followed was a series of hostility between the two. before, the threat of the other was only miniscule, because they both planned to whisk their darling away eventually.

• each hosmeade visit would be accompanied by the flanking of the darling, mattheo on the right and theodore on the left, doesn't matter if the reader had other plans, to bad so sad theodore wants to show them a new quill and mattheo has nothing else to do but follow his darling.

• the holidays are a nightmare, mattheo is going to show up unannounced no matter what, only to find theodore already settled in for a sleepover at readers house. the darling is on edge from the passive aggressive remarks, boarding on aggressive aggressive.

• it's impossible for one to pursue any kind of relationship without being intercepted by the other. oh, theodore asked reader out on a date? what a shame the day came by and he ended up in the hospital wing after falling down a flight of stairs. mattheo impromptly kissed reader? theodore's pulling them to him the moment after.

• this goes on kind of indefinately, until something trigger's a change. maybe it's voldemorts return, maybe the darling is injured, or maybe they begin a relationship with someone else. when their darling's safety and exclusivity to them is threatened, the theo's will reluctantly put aside their 'differences'.

• the change in behaviour is unnerving to say the least for the darling, his two slythergremlins suddenly getting along? in what alternate universe-

instead of pulling reader away from studying with theodore, mattheo calmly sat down, swung his legs over readers legs, his feet resting on nott's thigh and lit up a cigarette "you two still go to history of magic? i thought nott was supposed to be a slytherin, and surely you've got better things to do"

mattheo ignored pince scolding him in the distance, but his darling had already snatched the cigarette from his fingers "do you mind" "no". confusing the reader even more, theodore silently leaned behind him and motioned for mattheo to hand him a smoke, using his wand to light it up.

nott went back to studying, whilst the darling just sat there, looking back and forth between the two slytherins. "are- what- ... nevermind" the afternoon continued as usual, aside from the unusual behaviour witnessed.

• it wasn't a one time thing, instead of fighting over who'd partner with the reader in potions, they seemingly took turns. same with hodsmeade visits, and anything they couldn't do at the same time.

• things gradually became less platonic, from calling the reader "pretty boy" and forehead kisses from theodore, to blantant flirting and neck kisses from mattheo, rumours were understandably spreading.

mattheo furrowed his brows as his darling pulled away from his attempted neck kiss "everything good?" he asked, fiddling with strands of the others hair "you know people think we're gay and dating, right?" "aren't we?"

• things are kind of unofficially official, there was no discussion or agreement made between the darling and the theo's, things just escalated to the point everyone at hogwarts knew the reader was involved with nott and riddle in some way.

• it would honestly be sweet, if the reader was a willing participant. it's all fun and games until reader rejects the advances, and questions the possessiveness.

• mattheo will gaslight him whenever he tries to pull away, framing the entire relationship as readers idea. theodore simply scoffs, and tells him he doesn't know what's good for him, that's why you need me. silly darling can barely take care of himself, much less make good decisions, in general and romantically.

"okay then, who would you be with if you could pick? granger? i saw the way you looked at her the other day. god forbid you'd pick malfoy, he's got a golden clad stick up his ass" theodore chuckled, patting his darling on the back "my bed or riddle's tonight?" the smile he was giving his darling was almost taunting, as if to dare him to do something about his situation.

[sing-it-togetherzine]

F.A.Q*

I never participated in a zine before, what exactly are you expecting a “finished piece” to look like?

For artists, it depends on the artist and their style. For some it may mean fully rendered figures and backgrounds. For others it may mean a simpler background and colors. Everyone is going to have a different definition of “finished”. You want it to be presentable and nice to look at, not something you threw together without much thought. Try to think of what movie posters might look like, or phone/desktop wallpapers.

For authors, your story should have been edited at least once for spelling and grammar errors. Your story should be self-contained, a.k.a. a one-shot, with a beginning, middle, and resolution. There will be beta-readers available in a specific channel on discord, so if you need help and don’t want to ask anyone directly, you could always shoot a message there and someone will know to help.

Overall, it doesn’t hurt to apply! If you’re not sure what your “best example” work is, you can include a link to your blog/online portfolio (wherever you post art) and we’ll take a look.

Relationships aren’t always happy, can my piece be something besides fluff?

Within the limits of the PG rating, your piece can be happy/fluff, hurt-comfort, or angsty. Things that are generally not allowed for PG ratings include heavy violence/gore, heavy adult language, and explicit bedroom themes. Do you want to make us cry for Grandma Rosiepuff all over again? Bring it on.

What if I want to change my idea partway through the creation period?

If you get partway through your piece and decide on changing it to something totally new, please notify the mods first. Given that there are 3 months to work on your piece this will likely be allowed but you will have less time to finish it. To avoid this, we recommend really thinking over your idea early on, and if problems do arise you can use the #wip-feedback channel to get help.

Can I change from writing to art or art to writing after the creation period started?

Unfortunately, once you are accepted as either an author or artist, you are locked into that position. If you are someone who likes to make both art and fanfic, please take your time in deciding what you would like to focus on for the zine and apply at a later date. Applications are open until August 31st.

When I submit my art piece, how can I make sure quality stays the same?

To start, it helps to format your canvas to 2400px by 2400px or 8in by 8in and 300dpi. This will be the final size and resolution of each page of the zine. If you start with a smaller canvas and lower resolution the image will be blown up/stretched to the correct size and will likely loose clarity. When finished and ready to submit final files, you can simply save to Google Drive and share the link with the appropriate mod.

Can I sign/watermark my art before I submit?

Yes, you are welcome to sign your artwork anyway you normally do (if you do). However all creators will be listed on a credits page with their name and page(s) of their work, so you don’t have to worry about unsigned artwork not being credited. If you do decide to sign your artwork, we simply ask that you do so in a way that doesn’t interfere with the overall presentation. For example, a signature that is too big, a signature that blocks an excessive amount of details, or a watermark pattern that makes the image difficult to understand.

Do I have to use my real name for the credits page? What if I just want to use my online handle?

We will never ask for sensitive information, and that may mean the real or full name for some people. All we ask is some way to credit you. This can be your first name only, a nickname, or an online handle from any of your accounts (i.e. Tumblr, Instagram, Twitter/X, etc.). We will also include the primary account name/address for any creator who wishes to include one. For example, a piece could be credited like: Jane Doe, Jane, JD, Jbug, jbug @ tumblr, or any other combination. This goes the same for fanfic authors, although you will also be credited under the title of your fic.

Are alternate universe settings (AUs) allowed?

Alternate universes are absolutely allowed! However we do ask our creators to be mindful of how much the average viewer may know about them and work accordingly. For example, an au that needs a lot of explanation and previous knowledge may be a bit confusing, but more simple or self-explanatory aus (like human-aus or role-swap aus) should be fine.

Are original characters (OCs) allowed?

We ask that creators focus on canon characters in their piece, but ocs are allowed to be included. OCs are welcome as side characters, as in a fanfic, or in backgrounds of artworks for example. This is to avoid confusion for anyone who may view the zine but isn’t familiar with the multitude of fan-created characters.

*This list will be updated as necessary

[ritcchamadayo]

Please, Part 3 of Punk Jade, you're giving me more of a reason to simp for this man-

I will honestly GLADLY turn into a Jade-fic blog i am so far gone when it comes to this man... Sorry for the wait guys! Uni had me in a chokehold (again) but LETS GET BACK TO SIMPING

A Look Into The Past (Pt. 3)

Jade Leech x Reader ;

On a rare day off, Jade found himself pondering Professor Crewel's fashion tips when it came to styling his piercings but couldn't decide for himself. Who else to ask for opinions other than you?

(we're back again folks!! again thank you so much for the love on this fic!! I'll be considering posting this on Ao3 as a full series after this one XD THANK YOU!!!)

Reader is a Sophomore in this fic, just like the twins!

Read Part 1 Here! Read Part 2 Here!

"U-Um, so that's what you called me out for?" "Yes, exactly."

When Jade had contacted you saying that there was a "disaster", you certainly didn't expect the disaster to be the eel-mer's own wardrobe. You were surprised at the amount of clothes he had, but a few of them are quite... distasteful, to say the least.

When Jade wore his ear piercings to school the other time, he was stopped by none other but Professor Crewel and was given an earful about how to dress and act when wearing such flashy accessories. Granted, they were at school so it can't be helped, but Crewel made sure to make Jade remember his fashion tips for days off like today.

"Did Floyd get you this?" You hold up a purple shirt with a drawing of an eel, and big blocky text saying "Mentally Eel". You grimaced at how tacky the shirt was. "Ah, yes he did. Floyd has the habit of collecting anything eel-related in the surface world, you see."

You had to stifle a laugh at the thought. "Ah, that's where he got those eel keychains."

You rummaged through Jade's wardrobe (with permission, of course) and pulled out most of his clothes, gently putting them down and organizing them by type. There were a few normal button-up shirts, a pair of pajamas, Jade's hiking clothes and equipment, and let's not forget the winter clothes he wore on his trip to Harveston. (You wonder why he wore shorts AND leggings with his hiking wear, but you're not gonna question it.)

"What did Crewel say about them anyway? And uh, why me out of all people? I'm pretty sure someone like Vil or Cater could give you much better insight?" You ask. Jade tilts his head, pondering for a second. "Why, I suppose it's because you were the first person to pop up in my mind. I couldn't hope to bother our seniors, after all. Besides, your sense of fashion is quite good."

Bullshit reasoning. Or so you say, but you feel your ears heat up from the thought of Jade thinking of you. "Oh. I-I see." Jade wasn't lying when he said you had a good sense of fashion though, your choice of outfits on days off were always endearing to him. You were wearing a blouse paired with black overalls today, which looked both comfortable and fashionable at the same time.

"What did Crewel say?" "Hm... He said that a relaxed, mature look would suit for a lesser amount of accessories, to put it simply. Either that, or something simpler to accentuate the accessories if we were to wear more amounts."

Perhaps it's time for a little fashion show, then?

You quickly look around and pull out a few pieces of clothing- A pair of white pants and bright blue and yellow short sleeved shirt, giving off a bit of a tropical vibe. Jade took the clothes gratefully, putting them on the bed for him to change into.

"Oh? Are you perhaps going to watch me change, or~?" "I-I'M NOT! I'M LOOKING AWAY!!!" Your face shone red, quickly turning around to look at the door instead. Jade chuckled quietly, unbuttoning his shirt and taking them off. You can clearly hear the sound of him unzipping his pants as well, making you wipe your sweat off your forehead. (there's the urge to peek, but you better not.)

"Alright, I've finished changing. What do you think?"

You nervously turn around, and closely examined Jade in your chosen clothes. "It looks pretty good! I think a bit of a messier look would look nice with lots of accessories on your ears, like if you unbuttoned a few from the top of your shirt."

Jade complies, messing up his hair slightly and unbuttoning his shirt to reveal his collarbone, and you feel yourself regretting your words.

"I quite agree. The colors of the shirt pop with the addition of the white pants, and the silvers of the metal can be clearly seen."

"A-Ah, yeah!" (remember to look respectfully, dear) "Can you lean down for a sec?" Jade kneels down to your level sitting on the floor, and you take out a few of his accessories from the little wooden box he kept neatly inside his wardrobe. You picked up a few unused piercings and tried mixing and matching them on his ears, laughing when Jade comments your fussing over his ears tickles quite a bit.

"But it's not really your style, honestly... A flashy look like this kinda fits Floyd more." You comment, but deep down you think it wasn't a bad change of pace to see Jade in something other than buttoned-up shirts and suits. Turning back to the clothes pile, you pick out another set of clothes- this time, it was a comfy white turtleneck with black dress pants. You also found a brown trench coat in the depths of his wardrobe, which Jade said his parents' acquaintances gifted him for his birthday and he didn't know how to style it.

You looked back to the door once again as he changes out of the clothes, putting the new set on quickly and gracefully. "Oh, this definitely feels much more my style."

You turned around to see for yourself, and your eyes shone excitedly seeing him in the new getup. "Oh! Definitely!!" You cheered, giggling while at it. "You surprisingly suit the more mature-but-comfortable look, Jade." The eel-mer chuckles, sitting back down on the floor. "I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks so. What about the accessory choices, then?"

"Hmm... Crewel said that less is better in this getup, so just a little..." Picking up a few ring shaped ones, you carefully put a few piercings on Jade's ears- a simple look, consisting of the double helix on top of his ears and a couple of silver studs along his lobes.

"There! Well it isn't exactly a little either, but..."

Jade looked at the mirror in his room, a satisfied smile on his face. A smile that is neither shady, plotting, or emotionless- a genuinely happy smile. "My my, I was correct in assuming you had good taste in fashion. I'm rather confident in this look, actually. It's comfortable enough for me to move in, and yet still maintaining the fashionable aura from the coat."

You had a grin on your face, proud of your handiwork. "All thanks to you being a good model! And for having a variety of clothes I can choose from, haha."

You had quickly put the rest of his clothes back into his wardrobe after making a few other suggestions, and dusted yourself off as you stood up. "I should probably get going now, I wouldn't want to invade for too long." You say, stretching your arms and getting ready to get back to your dorm. You open the door, stepping out from his neat room.

"Ah, before that." Jade called out, following you outside. He quickly (and rather smoothly) took your hand in his, closing and locking up his room. "Since we're already in decent clothes, what do you say I take you on a small trip around Sage's Island? Perhaps we can stop by and grab some food. My treat of course, after you've oh-so graciously helped me."

Your cheeks heat up, and you feel your gaze lowering to stare at the floor instead of the man in front of you.

"...Is this your way of asking me out?" "Perhaps. Do you accept?"

You couldn't bring yourself to decline his offer. (Your empty stomach also couldn't.)

"S-sure then. I'd love to, Jade."

"Splendid. It's a date, then."

[sleepyorchidmonster]

What if TWST has a game franchise similar to LOZ, but it's Alice's adventures in Wonderland?

The series is quite popular, you play as Alice, with the Cheshire Cat as your companion (who tends to cause more problems than help out), the Vorpal Sword is basically the Master Sword and you help the Queen of Hearts by exploring dungeons and solving riddles and puzzles. There is even an Ace Attorney spin-off (not very successful, since the nonsensical rules annoy most players).

However, it's a general consensus that no one understands the first game. The whole playthrough amounts to 2 hours at most, though dataminers found more content in the code. It that wasn't enough, there is a weird sign right next to the first dungeon, who clearly breaks the fourth wall:

*

WARNING! YOUR GAME WILL NEVER BE THE SAME IF YOU DON'T GET THIS MESSAGE!

"Up is down, left is right,

Count the letters, subtract the spaces,

1 2 3 know 9 8 7 are your friends, now and ever,

Mind the gaps, ignore the rabbit,

There is no fun that is not maddening!"

There is also a small note in the back, written in blood-red ink, signed with a paw-print:

"I watch everything with a disinterested smirk,

With lazy eyes that twinkle like faraway suns,

You'll never find me in the night sky while I lurk,

'Cause, "mime a ton, drum te hey!"

*

Now, the Cheshire cat was only introduced in a later game, so people kept trying to find glitches to the moon (they also didn't find the cat and kept talking to a mime NPC). A quick look at the Queen's Rules also didn't help, since the number you get when subtracting the letters and spaces while ignoring the numbers just doesn't add up (something about doing parkour whenever a tree is planted).

So it stayed that way, just like the "Mew under the truck" thing.

Until Cater decided to stream a playthrough alongside the dorm (it fits the Heartslabyul theme, also Riddle is interested in gaming, so why not start with a simpler game that is also a classic).

You see, firstly, if you consider the numbers as actual names and write them as words, you get additional letters that, when subtracted by the spaces...still get a rule that doesn't make sense (don't eat a tart after midnight) BUT, if you know about Queendom history, you'll know that this rule was added by the White Rabbit to fill a GAP in the book after the Queen banned a rule about the correct way to dance (up, down, left, right, two steps forward, one step back).

Long story short, Riddle solved the problem.

So, you can get that dance and replicate it in the game, swapping up with down and left with right (forward and backwards would also be up and down, in this case).

As for the extra note, they already knew it was the cat, but if you scramble "Mime a ton, drum te hey!", you get "I am on the tree, dummy!"

The cat introduced himself, saying he'll follow the player on the next journey, but not before giving a tip: "If you want to keep going, you have to be as mad as everyone here! Why kill when you can dance? They do say singing wards off evil..."

Riddle explained all of this in fifteen minutes. Just to humor him, Cater left the sign and made a beeline for the first tree in the area, expecting nothing of it.

The Cheshire Cat showed up, his smile overtaking the screen.

And with that, Cater wordlessly rushed to the first dungeon, doing the dance code instead of killing the first enemy.

The game crashed.

And then a cutscene started playing.

It was basically the Jabberwock appearing and destroying the dungeon's ceiling. Apparently he is "searching for that damn cat" and "hoping to battle his nemesis again". With that, he leaps to the sky, and we get the game's title drop.

Do note that the game was using a style similar to "A Link to the Past" at first, but everything changed and now it looks like Twilight Princess.

And that's how Cater's streams became famous. Also everyone is trying to memorize the Queen's rules.

The streams now happen in Ramshackle, with the entire cast present. Also Riddle is annoyed because people keep asking for his assistance with solving game puzzles.

Alternatively, this could also happen in Book 6.

Everyone speedrunnimg the Overblot fight just so they can keep playing.

[thydungeongal]

Hiiiiiiiiiiiii :3

Do you have any thoughts on the practice of players providing a 'Backstory' to the GM before a new (usually long term tbf) game starts.

I've had some success using them as sources of characters explicitly connected to the players in 5e campaigns, but I also often end up with players who immediately forget everybit and it does feel like giving out homework. I've seen and very much liked the dungeon world/PbtA style come up with your character at the table with the other players method.

I'm not 100 sure but I feel the practice is pretty widespread throughout the online dnd culture and sometimes I feel like 5 or so people creating characters on their own just means each person has a very different idea of the world that only muddles the shared fiction when actually at the table.

Sorry if this is a word salad and feel free to ignore, I really enjoy your insights about the hobby!

Don't worry about it, this is very clear and concise! I have lots of thoughts about character backstory which might mark me a heretic, but the thing I want to make clear is: you don't need to do it the way I do it. But especially in recent years I've realized that the way I do things is considered very unorthodox, so I'm staring this upfront as a preference and not the one true way!

So, first of all, I don't think there is anything wrong with writing elaborate character backstories per se, but I do not think they should be considered necessary! What can be enough for character creation is what the character's current deal is and then playing to find out what happens! Now, if the GM and players are both on the same page with the amount of prep they want to do for the campaign and the GM is willing to include it in their prep, then absolutely, go hog wild!

As for the Dungeon World style character creation, I really enjoy it. Even though I like simpler, challengier games where group background beyond "these idiots decided to form an adventuring party and go die in a ditch together" rarely matters, for games where you want a bit more narrative continuity group creation is really good! There have also been a few D&Dish games that have implemented this into it. Beyond the Wall and Other Adventures is a good example, where the characters of the players sitting next to you at the table will actually be involved in your character's randomly generated backstory! There's also a swords and sorcery version of Beyond the Wall whose name I can't remember but that is more focused on adult adventurers, where Beyond the Wall is about young adult and teen heroes in a fantasy setting.

But yeah, I don't think long backstories are a necessity, because often it's much cooler to find out what a character's deal is through play than have it written out, but I don't think there's anything wrong with elaborate prewritten backstories. And also group background creation rules and can instantly help establish connections within the group. :)

[thecrowandtheraven08]

Get to Know My Tav!

Thank you @kelandrin for the tag to share this challenge! I'm so excited to share! And will happily read more when you share :3

Cassian Tlin’orzza | Lolth Sworn Drow | Cleric | They/Them | 27

What is your Tav’s…

favorite weapon: A good Morningstar

style of combat: Defensive Healer

most prized possession: An old necklace given to them by their dead fiancé

deepest desire: To be loved and respected

guilty pleasure: They secretly adore sweets and hide the baked goods to eat when the others can’t see

best-kept secret: How life in the Underdark went for them. They refuse to tell anyone (Astarion and Halsin know now of course)

greatest strength: They’re very good at reading people

fatal flaw: Assuming they’re stronger than whoever they come across. That and digging up every grave they come across

favorite smell: They love floral and herbal scents

favorite spell or cantrip: Depending on the day it’s Mass Healing Word or Spirit Guardians

pet peeve: Definitely when people just stare at them. They’re begging people to either talk with them or move on

bad habit: Misplacing the equipment and not being able to find what they need

hidden talent: They’re really good at lock picking

leisure activity: They love to journal

favorite drink: Tea, specifically a sweet one with honey in it

comfort food: Cinnamon Rolls

favorite person: A tie between Astarion and Halsin

favored display of affection (platonic and/or romantic): They love to press their forehead against their partners. That and kiss their foreheads

fondest childhood memory: Uhhh. They really liked when they thought their parents were dead. If you count when they were 17, it would be when Cassian and Eaerin first met and started dating. Simpler times

Is there anything else you'd like to share? Cassian lost their eye to the hag, and the eye they lost was pink. Their eye color was one of the things they were the most insecure about as a small child. In the Underdark, they hated the purple because it was a sign they were “impure” (their father likely had high elf in his lineage). And on the surface, the pink was just a reminder of Lolth’s teachings and Drow society as a whole. In a sense, they knew where they stood inside and decided if they had to lose one, it would be the pink

As for tagging others, @silentspectres if you wanted to do it on Mercury and/or Shrike I would absolutely go feral >:3c

Also @abyssal-prince if you would want to as well I would also go feral for either of your little sillies >:3c

[9800sblog]

charity event tarot reading

70% of profits go towards Patinhas Carentes

PT-BR/ENG

★ the organization

this is a non-profit organization towards cats and dogs, it has helped animals and owners for over a decade, not exclusive to the ones involved or residing in the organization. I've had the opportunity to volunteer multiple times in the cat house and visit the dog house, as well as participate in their events, they are extremely organized and kind. as most charity work, unfortunately they struggle with funds oftenly, as most of the animals they rescue are sick, hurt and/or old. you can find more information in their website or instagram page!

★ what is this event?

it's a group of inexpensive and simpler readings, in order to accumulate some money for the organization. it's 1 paragraph per question, and there's a list of options for readings in the end of the post! I have made a pick a card to promote this event where you can check out my abilities, my writing style and length.

★ how is this trustworthy?

I will keep as much transparency as I can! you can either choose to send money directly to the organization with PicPay, or Pix, if you're brazilian, or send it to me via PayPal, knowing that 30% will go to my pocket to make sense of the time and energy I will spend in this, keeping me away from work and resting. if you send it through me, here's how it'll work: the money will be kept in my bank account until the 8th of December, when the event officially ends. on the 9th, I will send 70% of the accumulated money to them and post all types of bank receipts, tag all the people that participated and screenshots/proof of the organization receiving the money! I would ask that you add your username and "para: Patinhas Carentes" in the note of your transaction so I can be sure and also use it as proof of the amount. if there are ever any questions about this, I won't hesitate to answer!!

★ how can you participate?

through my DMs or askbox (anonymous not allowed), one can tell me they wanna participate and which question(s) they want. send me the confirmation of payment + a fact about you, and you'll be added to the list! 😊 if your question involves another person, make sure to add the preferred gender. please send feedback that I can post so others may feel more comfortable about participating!

★ keep in mind!

after the 8th of December, the event is over and every reading you buy from me will be processed as the usual ones! you can still give them your donation, but if you buy a reading from me after this time, 100% of the profits will be pocketed and go towards whatever I decide as it will be my money.

I will answer the requests from this event in around 3 days!

reminder that if you send the money through me, I will send all of it as a single amount on the 9th!

these are simple and not detailed readings, as there are multiple people I have to answer to and little time to focus on each individual. if you want a more detailed reading you can do the usual reading with me and wait 2-4 weeks as we have long conversations and stuff, but for this event, I cannot give more than what I prepared.

★ payment options!

PicPay: @patinhas.carentes

Pix: patascarentes@gmail.com

PayPal: 4433xyz@gmail.com (mine)

★ reading options!

as I did a poll asking which subject the tumblr community would prefer, most of the questions are about future spouses, but you can surely ask about any subject or person, as long as you're paying and being respectful.

1 question (3$/R$)

2 questions (5$/R$)

3 questions (9$/R$)

4 questions (15$/R$)

5 questions (20$/R$)

5$/R$ readings!

shufflemancy

pictures

a look into your future family

how is your connection protected?

how they'd take care of you?

glimpse into a special or magical moment with them

your shared philanthropic destiny

their gifts for your life

who are your spiritual protectors/advisors?

found family: who was meant to be in your life?

messages from your pets

general characteristics of your fs

where does your soul feel at home?

your path into their life

your love story in a past life

your love story in this life

your first lifetime together

fear of abandonment: how will they open you up?

how you'll meet

what keeps you both connected?

what stands in your way?

how can you erase the obstacles?

10$/R$ readings

when you'll meet - numbers and general description

unique signs and characteristics for recognition

your paths into each other's lives

how were you hurt in a past life?

[valeriefauxnom]

More Dragalia Minor Details!

This time, quotes edition!

I think it's interesting how Leonidas and Phares both have a sort of speech pattern in their unit quote spread as well as their general dialogue. Leonidas is the simpler one to explain, so I'll start with him. He utilizes a lot of 'Perhaps' in his quotes.

Ex, among his Gala and Summer alts, he says:

Perhaps I ought to make arrangements for the decisive battle that awaits. My brother has acquired many useful pawns. His good-naturedness perhaps has merit. Perhaps I'll go surfing. Perhaps curry for supper? Perhaps I will stop in at the cafe.

If I read into it, I might say it is a reflection on his focus on the future. Leonidas is always looking for paths to make his ideals reality, and how he acts in the present is all in fulfillment of his aims. As such, evaluating each action under how it might help said goals might be more on his mind (even when it comes to things like leisure, 'would my goals be hindered if I do so/could I accomplish something to further my aims if I did?'), leading to the overuse of perhaps.

In a broader sense, Leonidas tends to flip-flop verbally between simple, short sentences, rarely busting out the flowing complicated ones one might expect as the standard 'royal' speech patterns. Sometimes he compromises between the two worlds and throws complicated words into short sentences to get his mood across succinctly.

Here's what I mean.

Phares, meanwhile, has his own fixation on a word. Several, in fact. The biggest are 'must' and 'will', but in general sentiment, he has another tendency. It's a bit hard to describe, but while he is future-focused like Leonidas, he expresses it more in concrete terms of what to do, with no true 'deliberation' found in Leonidas' 'perhaps'.

Take these lines from his unit (emphasis mine as I try to illustrate):

My next experiment will be... I must procure a book. I must make record of this. I swear to find a treatment for wyrmscale so the tragedy of our royal family is never repeated. How many times have I envied Valyx's stoutness? I shall have to ask him for some training. I should have died, but was kept alive. My task now is to show the meaning of that to the world. I shall support you. I will not let you die here! I will investigate truth, and contribute to the people until the life granted to me is ended.

Hopefully this helps give an idea of what I mean. There's no real deliberation about his next action; he has already decided, and is dead-set on doing so unless and until it kills him. It's an interesting departure from Leonidas, since Leonidas himself is rather blunt and similarly dead-set at times but still hedges a lot more than Phares.

As for his general speaking style, Phares, whether using short or long sentences, more frames things in a bit of an atypical way than necessarily using complex words all the time. Like, instead of, 'no need to be formal / no need for formalities' he instead will say, 'there is no need for formalities among we fellows of science'. Don't get me wrong, he uses more complex/rarer words often, but they're not an absolute prerequisite to the atypical wording, if you get my drift.

Examples:

(Instead of 'it's okay' or other typical variations)

(Instead of 'don't worry')

To explain these tendencies, I'd simply line it up with his many brushes with death in the recent past. By the end of Phares' adventurer story, he's almost died an additional 2-3 times, and that's not counting his previous issues with wyrmscale and the Progenitor. He knows just how tenuous life is, and yet wishes to do so much in the future to capitalize on the many near-saves he's had. To him, he likely no longer has the luxury of indecision at all: what he wants (to live, to protect his family, the world, to learn more), he will manifest it through determination alone.

Heck, even his adventurer story ends on this, highlighting the 'will' tendency:

So yeah, when I noticed these two had a particular flair to their style of speech, I figured I'd write it down! Maybe I'll find something more for some of the other family members, but these two were the most glaring with the repetition.

[vikenticomeshome]

Cyberchase: How It All Started (Episode 3)

This comic was later renamed to Cyberchase Web Adventures Episode 3.

This is third episode, so let's make the intro more abbreviated.

The only credit for the production was a general copyright by the Educational Broadcasting Corporation. It used to be available for free online. Now, I am archiving it for the fans.

I will use the original 2001 version of the panels with the dark blue border when possible. However, if this is unavailable, I will use the redesigned version with the light-blue border.

If you want to see the comic with the simpler animations, go find my curation from Blue Maxima's Flashpoint Archive Project. I can't reproduce the animations on Tumblr.

I'll save my thoughts for the end, unless I absolutely need to make editor's notes.

Go.

Narration: Having escaped from the clutches of Hacker, Digit returns to Motherboard, and is greeted warmly by Dr. Marbles.

Dr. Marbles: Welcome home, Digit. While we cannot reformat the past - we can upload a brighter future.

Digit: I couldn't have said it better myself, Doc!

Narration: Hacker is furious that Digit changed sides and returned to Motherboard.

The Hacker: Nobody - not Motherboard, not Dr. Marbles, and certainly not that traitorous tin turkey will stop me from becoming the new ruler of Cyberspace!!!

Delete: Yeah, right boss! The new ruler!

Buzz: Gulp! Whatever you say, boss! Right!

Narration: Meanwhile, on Earth, three kids who don't know each other are about to have the adventure of their lives.

Narration: Meet Jackie, who has her own sense of style...

Jackie: I gotta organize this stuff!

Narration: ...and her own way of doing things!

Narration: Matt lives on a farm with his family, and dreams of being the homerun champ. Little does he know he'll soon be a hero of a different kind.

Narration: Matt is into Greek Mythology big time!

Narration: This is Inez - A computer whiz.

Narration: She loves to visit the Cyberworld of the Internet - But never imagined she could really go there!

Editor's Note: Yeah, I still don't know why they made Inez white here.

Narration: Inez has to get to the library before it closes, but she has a bunch of errands to run first.

Inez: Oh, no, this is not good at all!

Editor's Note: There is a later version of this page where they decided that Nezzie needed a helmet. Safety first.

Editor's Note: And now, we play a flash game called "Bike Route".

Inez: Oh Boy! I've got a lot of errands to run and not much time!

Inez: I've made a map that shows all of the places I need to go. Let me show you.

Editor's Note: Her checklist consists of Home, Betty's House, Post Office, Video Store, and Library

Narration: Inez needs to figure out the shortest number of blocks to get all her chores done and get to the library on time. Can you help her do it?

Narration: Here's a map to use. Inez can do the chores in any order, but she has to end up at the library.

Narration: This box shows the number of blocks you have left to get to the library in time.

Narration: These are all of the errands Inez needs to do.

Narration: Click on the blinking dots to move Inez around.

Narration: Well done!

Narration: You got to the library just in time! Now let's go on with the adventure...

Narration: Back in Cyberspace, Hacker works on a plan that will shut down Motherboard's computer circuits once and for all.

Buzz: Grumph mumph gurgle glunk

The Hacker: Charge me up, boys! It's time to wreak some Cyber-havoc!

Delete: Right, boss, right away!

Narration: Inez, Matt and Jackie are about to meet for the very first time.

Inez: Cool! I made it to the library in time!

Jackie: Man, I've got a ton of homework!

Matt: I can't wait to find out more about that Cerberus!

Editor's Note: The books in Jackie's hands have the writing backwards. The larger one is titled "How to Dye Your Own Fabric". The smaller one is too blurry to make out the title.

Narration: Dr. Marbles is busy giving Motherboard a routine upgrade.

Digit: Here we go, Doc. The Didge has whatever you need!

Narration: Meanwhile, inside the Grim Wreaker, Hacker discovers Inez, Matt and Jackie inside the library.

The Hacker: Yes.. Yes! Pay attention you degradable dunce-buckets, Motherboard's hard drive is about to crash!

Narration: Check out the adventures of the Cybersquad Online & on TV

Narration: Check TV Schedule

Editor's Note: This is another case where I believe the original background for this panel has been lost. This panel states "Check out the adventures of the Cybersquad online & on TV". However, the alt text states "STAY TUNED! THE NEW ADVENTURES OF CYBERCHASE ARE STARTING ONLINE & ON TV JANUARY 21ST!"

And that's the end of the comic.

So, what did I think about it? I enjoyed it. They made some odd choices with some of these panels. The first panel shows Motherboard with the background she got after the virus infection during Season 1 Episode 1 "Lost My Marbles". The second panel clearly shows the Crystal of Calamore that The Hacker retrieved during Season 1 Episode 11 "A Day at the Spa". If this is still canon, then that is a very confusing detail. Of course, with all the expansion to The Hacker's backstory on the show over the years, including contradictory information, we don't know whether this is still canon.

I don't understand why they made the library look like a circus tent. I see circles, squares, and triangles on the railing and trees. They must have adapted a screenshot from the Poddleville Pilot. I can't tell what's sticking out of Matt's bag on that panel. It almost looks like The Map from Dora the Explorer. I wonder if that was an easter egg.

[naruto-calendar]

This year, we'll be changing up some things for the Naruto Calendar.

1. A shorter timeline schedule

This year, instead of going to mid-December, the final deadline will be at the start of November, likely November 1. This will allow time for final preparations and emergencies--and maybe even let us release the calendar earlier!

The schedule for the 2024 calendar has yet to be set in stone, but the rough schedule so far is: June for apps, Jul-Oct for creation, Nov for finalization, and Dec for release.

Apps will be opening in the first week of June so stay tuned!

2. Better Announcements/Reminders

We know not everyone uses Discord often. So to help keep everyone in the loop about deadlines and changes, we will be posting announcements and reminders here on this blog as well as sending out emails.

For Tumblr notifications, we will tag you in the post, and for email, we will be sending out notification emails through our email: naruto.calendar@gmail.com

Participating in these type of notifications will be optional. After you get in, we will send out another form that you may choose to fill out if you would like to be notified via these methods.

3. Calendar Templates

To streamline the final process near the end, this year we will be providing calendar page templates that artists will have to pair their art to, rather than the other way around.

4. Phone version of the calendar

If you're an artist who doesn't really want to collab with a writer, well you're in luck! Aside from the cover artist role, this year you can apply to work on the phone calendar. This calendar will feature its own collection of art, simpler in style than the desktop/printable versions that we've done in the past. And, of course, this calendar will be vertically formatted to better fit a phone background.

As the phone calendar artist, you will create art for all 12 months. Though the topics will be decided by the other calendar participants, you will have the creative freedom to interpret their chosen themes/topics as you see fit.

Since this would be our first time attempting such a thing, we do expect the way we approach the phone calendar will change as we go. Suggestions are welcome!

[space-woomy]

What my agents wear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I decided to talk about what my agents wear for some reason (I was thinking about a fic idea. The kind that I will not post). I'll talk about what their main outfit is composed of, what they like to wear In general, the brands they like, and then some outfits they wear.

Molly (Three)

Molly has autism (as you could probably tell at this point), so they've got sensory issues when it comes to touch. They like loose fitting clothes that don't touch their body too much (like a really baggy hoodie), light clothes in general, and soft clothes.

For their main fit, they wear a few layers; 1st they have on underwear of course, and then they have on thermal clothes. It keeps them warm and stuff, but they also have a set from a brand that uses a kind of soft material. It's also snug on them, so despite touching basically all of thier body, it doesn't really shift that much. It's especially comfy in alterna (This is what I interpret the ragged and ripped clothes they have on under their poncho to be.) Next, they have on a a loose fitting shirt over that, and then they have on the Captain poncho. Then, they have on their big coat. It's slightly weighted (Very slightly…), and they like it for the small amount of pressure it puts on them. 

Here's the main fit:

(It would have the cap of legend but I work below minimum wage at grizzco :’) ((OR IT COULD HAVE THE CAPTAINS GEAR HEADSET IF THEY PUT IT IM THE GA- ))

The main brands they stick with are Squid Force and Krak-on. They occasionally get an annaki piece. They like S.F and K.O because they're just familier with them, and they generally have good textures on their clothes. They don't really care about what their outfit looks like (nor could they discern what a good outfit looks like) So they only go by texture.

And here's some seasonal outfits!

Eight

Eight is alright with most clothing. She takes fashion and style into account some of the time, but mostly cares about function over form. Sometimes she’ll deliberately choose outfits that are slightly more revealing just to fluster Molly (Crop tops usually get them). THey usually wear stuff from firefin, zekko, and squid force.

Their main outfit is a lot simpler than Three’s. She wears a fishfry bandana, (She would have on the golden toothpick, but it’s not even in splat 3 :’) ) and then an octo-tee underneath an annaki flannel hoodie. And then some punk nights

Here's the main outfit:

And here’s some seasonal clothes!

Alex (Four)

Four doesn't care about how clothes feel at all (unless it’s, like, literal sandpaper or something…), and trys to be very fashionable. It’s really for her own sake though, she just likes looking good. Whenever she can afford to Spend a bit more than usual (which is never lol) she’ll get an expensive piece of clothing. Not something that’s like, just a white tee-shirt with a single logo on it, but something actually nice, like something from toni kensa. She usually doesn't care about brands 

She also needs glasses…

Here's the main outfit:

Here's some seasonal outfits!

(I don’t have much for these 2 so please ask any questions about them please please please please please please please please please please plea)

[moccabunie]

things I've learned after a year writing fanfiction

This is a post from a non-writer who, apparently, now writes (❓) And this is a little crazy to me, considering that a year ago writing less than 1k decent words took a lot of effort. But this year I have completed a +100k project. (It's still difficult, though.)

I found out that the more I wrote, the easier it was to get into the story. So I think that being captivated by my own story has made a lot. I am an eager fanfiction reader, but I had yet to really try to write something on my own.

That was until I got hyper-fixated on three characters and wrote a small story about them sharing a room, and it was one of the funniest and most rewarding things I've done. So I was like "oh, maybe I can try to imagine stories I would like to read?"

(1) story one - a bird told me to wait

The first thing I considered was to make it completely self-indulging. The second was to make it as evocative as possible, not only telling what was happening. I like sensations and emotions, so I really wanted to write things I would like to feel as a reader. I wrote this story, and after that, I added a second longer part because I was enjoying it a lot. I used to doodle about the characters and make small annotations about their dynamics, but there wasn't really a lot of planning here.

(2) story two - beneath the moonlight

My second attempt was a three-chapter story (not so distant from the previous one that can be read as three parts too). But for this one, I wanted to challenge myself because I wanted to explore new themes and tropes, so I made a brief list of the things that should appear here. (but honestly, I just wanted to write a soft mating bite scene lmao, because I was super into a/b/o at that time.) I used keep notes app this time.

I barely showed explicit themes here but I got to enjoy the story anyway. This one wasn't difficult to write because I felt familiar with the characters. It's a light story but these 20k words gave me the courage to take a step further. I said to myself

"stop being a coward. you have enjoyed this. keep writing."

(3) story three - lucid dreams

This one was planned for four or five chapters, quite in the same line as beneath the moonlight. But, and the keyword is planned, it became a full 13 chapters as I developed the story and the characters. If I wanted it to be coherent then I needed to explain the things, build the context, and introduce the world. But it was also an experimental work. I took my notebook and listed the new things I wanted to try, such as - write in past tense - write first and edit later

my process was something like this • imagine random scenarios with pretty imagery as I listened to music • doodling the characters doing things so I didn't forget • open the notes app to write random sentences and dialogues in the middle of the night, I'll find a place for them later • dream about the story and daydream about the story

as for the physical notebook, I have scribbled A LOT there during the writing process.

(a little bit chaotic but functional enough)

One thing I wanted to keep in mind was the evolution of the characters, or in other words, how they were gonna be at the start and the end of the story. And this made things a lot simpler because it gave me an insight that was helpful whenever I had to decide what kind of decisions the characters would make along the story.

Parallelly, I was aware of my narrative flaws, as well as there was a lot of vocabulary and grammar that would escape me in a different language. So I used the notebook to do writing research. Some of my pages were like "how to write action scenes," or "tips for flat scenes." Whenever I felt blocked I read again these pages.

I'm going to copy down here some tips that were useful during the writing block days.

• read another book or fic you like, since sometimes, getting yourself caught by another writer's style can help you to flow through your own. • scroll on pinterest and try to find pictures that capture the vibe of your story, maybe try to describe them or setting a scene in a similar environment that you can see? • changing the setting (for example, day to night, or sun to rain) can add more variants and ambiental tools to play with. • or, changing the character's pov. maybe a scene feels flat because it's narrated by the wrong character. • use objects, not just the characters.

(4) finishing a story

To have an insight into the plot, I wrote the main scenes in really short sentences. That was useful for the first chapters, but suddenly I had 70K words of the story and a lot of details to track. Frequently I had to split chapters into two parts because the "short sentence" became a very long scene. See this comparison: the scenes' guide in the last chapters usually are fragmented into shorter scenes. That's how I avoided losing my mind as I wrote (?)

These are a few tips that were useful to me during this last part.

• write the important plot points as they are mentioned so you can come back to them later and don't forget about them. • keep a scrip to annotate significant things about the characters to make the story consistent. • notion pages is a great place to make inspo boards (usually I added 4 pictures for each scene). During the last chapter, I used the to-do list tool to keep track of the closed story points and the things that were yet to happen • list some of your favourite past scenes, those that have been nice to write, so you can pursue the same vibe again.

The last two months writing the fic I joined the nanowrimo to keep myself motivated but also to have an impulse. My only goal was getting the habit of writing everyday, not minding how many words (usually it was around 400-600 daily). I ended that month with 16k added on my wordcount (to me, that was a lot!). Since I enjoyed that little challenge, I did the same on the next month, resulting in finishing the fic :)

The most important thing during this time was remembering myself from time to time why I am doing this. Let me say I am an utter perfectionist, so I would easily get trapped in making-the-story-perfect, which would end in a writing block. So each time this happened I repeated to myself that I didn't want to write a good story. I just wanted to enjoy and have fun while writing a story, so I should write only things I enjoy. And this simple thing was incredibly helpful whenever I wasn't able to continue a scene.

I think that this is what most writers say, but now I have come to understand that it's true: just have fun. Write what you wanna read.

(5) the next story - requiem of the sleepless

This would be the third part of my first fic. I miss these unhinged boys and I have a little draft of (unholy) things I want to happen to them! Now I want to unlearn everything I know. I want this story to be zero planned, I just want to ~feel~ the characters and make a lot of random things happen. This is about not forgetting why I started, so here I am again.

Being a non-writer writing.

thank you for reading ♡ 

[wisteriasakana]

Sprite template: Guildmaker7

Pink Pro Update!

The Yuri Game Jam is over, and it still feels strange to me to have submitted well in advance (Then I remembered that the deadline was pushed back by like a week, so I would have submitted just in time, but details-). Deciding to post a demo rather than the whole game turned out to be a good choice for my peace of mind.

Now, I should make a pretty and tidy (One of the two adjectives might be wrong) update, but first I want to present you a flashback from a few days ago:

---Flashback---

*Soe enters *Soe sees real money *Soe implodes *Soe waits a couple of days to see if it was a misclick - Yes, even the confirmation one *Soe realizes *Soe implodes again *Soe's mass is not enough to generate a gravitational collapse, so there's no black hole but just an amazed fish

Person who decided to offer me a hot chocolate, thank you. I still find it hard to believe, but I thank you very much! °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

---Flashback End---

So, it was said. Pink Pro. The update, yes.

Changes and additions

Since I have more time and can do things more slowly, I decided to fix a few things that I wasn't sure about.

For example, Sus's house. You can't visit it in the demo, and in a second time I'll show you a "before-after", but trust me when I say that the first version was absolutely plain and uninspiring - It's even more comical when you consider that it's reiterated how rich Sus is and how her house is ridiculously big. Now I am much more satisfied! It's certainly not the most beautiful map I've ever made, but I find it does its honest job much better than the previous one.

Among other differently useful things I decided to add there is the change of NPCs inside the Pink Jewel and the Magnolia Jane after some time.

Given that time is actually passing (I mean, something is likely to happen in the evening, right?), it seemed silly to me for the customers to be walking around the shops for 12 hours.

It doesn't impact the plot at all, but I think it gives the setting a bit more three-dimensionality.

(Yes, I also entertained the idea of changing customers with each finished order, but my imagination for NPC dialogue is very poor, I don't want to suffer).

Characters' expressions

When I made the expressions, I got a bit carried away, so now Chantal has many more than I had planned. However, this means that I didn't do some expressions that I should have done and that I came up with others-

According to my fantastic to-do list, the expressions that are missing are: 4 for Chantal, 2 for Janet (Yes, Janet has more than two expressions!), 1 for Margrit, 3 for Kenicea and Silsdia, 2 for Saster, Byma and Nicopte (Yes, she also has expressions!), 4 for Sus, Zora and Deilela. The last three might have one less, depending on how they look best.

My relationship with doing expressions is: sometimes, I get on and do them all in less than an hour, without any problem. Other times, for reasons unknown, I spend an hour doing one, which also turns out ugly.

In this case, however, it is not a matter of procrastination - I often literally just forget to do them. (๑꒪▿꒪)*

Other ideas

Since I have more time, I was thinking about adding another, simpler CG - Just coloured lineart on a unicolour background.

On the other hand, I decided to scrap a small idea I had planned to do if I had more time / for a possible update: Chantal's sweets designs.

I would like to show off her "eye-catching" style more concretely, but when I tried to draw them, I realized that was definitely not the case (Let's say, like, no one in the world would have realized that the Île flottante was an Île flottante and not an ugly sponge).

The options, then, are three:

One day I'll be able to draw better and I'll put pretty pictures for all the recipes;

One day I'll go begging for people who can draw pretty food;

Imagination is a wonderful gift, imagine these beautiful recipes in your mind ♡♡♡

Cutscenes

As for the cutscenes, however, I am exactly halfway through, at the third order. I therefore have to finish the third order, do the fourth and fifth, the final climax and the epilogue.

To reassure you, as already mentioned, in the midst of all this there are also Important Scenes, and those have all been done.

And that's it for Pink Pro!

Yes, of course, it's because I'm also working on something else - I can't concentrate on the same thing for more than two days in a row if I don't have at least one side project.

I'll talk about that, though, in the next few days - The devlog on Candy Apple has become the devlog on Candy Apple and Red Riding Hood and the Little Bad Wolf, just as the projects on Three Yellow Quartzes will need a separate devlog.

Thanks for listening, and see you next time!