#death dies hard
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Second period of this year unlocked. I guess that's also an achievement. Hormones are awful. All these feels.
#gender dysphoria#tw dysphoria#periods#menstrual cycle#menstrual health#endometriosis#ftm#trans masc#trans guy#cancer#chronic illness#terminal illness#idk how to say i hate my period but i'm happy to see it#bc my body is so broken my menstrual cycle has shut down#over a year ago#death dies hard#thanatos paian#death is also a healer#tw depression
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Light’s mom & sister: Light died trying to fight Kira he must be happy in heaven 🥺😔
Matsuda:
#death note#happy Light died day#Matsuda#matsuda touta#I was laughing so hard drawing this#I’ve wanted to draw this me for a bit now but I never could think of a good idea#till now that is#oh also this is the idea no one told them the truth because I doubt anyone would#…or maybe this is how Matsuda breaks the news LOLL
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RADIOAPPLE COTL AU!
"What do you do when a mere scapegoat becomes so enamored with the God Of Death that they actually look forward to dying again and again just to see Him?"
"What do you do when said God Of Death yearns for the sacrificial lamb's PERMANENT DEATH and this very thought is actually the reason He smiles at them?"
"But it's only because He wants to own them FOREVER the only way He knows how??? ...For His Vessel's soul to be HIS to keep."
Basically, this is my COTL Radioapple AU idea! (NOTE: Read it all over again! This time, just the yellow highlighted words for a different experience and perspective on things! 😉 Trust me on this.) -Bubbly💙
#spacebubblearts#hazbin hotel#cotl#radioapple#appleradio#angst#sort of#misunderstandings#y'all were too happy too long#it's about time for drama me thinks#COTL AU#cult of the lamb#narilamb#implied#lucifer morningstar#alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#radio demon#god of death#king of hell#cult leader#“Alastor: How can you NOT know I was courting you? I made my intentions VERY clear!”#“Lucifer: You literally told me to kms and tried to take my soul on multiple occasions. 😑”#“Alastor: To keep you forever of course! I'm the God Of Death???”#“Lucifer: Wait no y is dis ded as rizz working tho- 😳”#NEVER think I wish to romanticize 'sewing-side' EVER#but when the God Of actual DEATH is involved it's kinda hard not to be so casual about the topic of the afterlife.#this has gotten more serious than I intended#lucifer x alastor#alastor x lucifer
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Ghost Cora AU where he’s actually been following Law around ever since he died but nobody has been able to see him, so all he’s able to do is watch Law get hurt and suffer in silence. UNTIL, miraculously, the battle of Dressrosa ends, and for some strange reason—through some supernatural bullshit or maybe just fate—one person is finally able to see him.
Law is sitting on the deck of the Yonta Maria watching everyone party when Luffy comes trotting over to him. And Luffy plops down beside him and says, “I’ve been meaning to ask, Torao, but who’s that really tall blonde guy with the funny makeup that’s been following you around?”
And Law’s just like
#Meanwhile Cora is absolutely THRILLED. LMAO#Eventually Zoro calls Perona over and since her devil fruit power deals with ghosts. She makes it so that Law can see Cora too#(And by some bs he’ll probably be brought back to life somehow idk)#One Piece#Trafalgar Law#Donquixote Rosinante#Cora#Corazon#Luffy#Law: Ha. Haha.#Law: You’re shitting me right.#Luffy: ??? What? No?#Cora: LAWWWWWW 😭😭😭#Luffy: He’s crying your name this guy CLEARLY knows you Torao#Law; having a mental breakdown: Uh. Uh-huh???#Shima speaks#Sorry I’m coping. I’m coping really hard rn#Actually. I feel like I was more upset about Cora’s death than Ace’s. WHICH LIKE. YOU’D THINK IT WOULD BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND BUT#I’m very. Very weak for the unsuspecting father figure who dies trope#(Sideeyes Tony and Harry (who didn’t even die anyway but it was still Traumatic for Eggsy to watch))#COUGHS
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Day 2: Timeloop / Xiao Qi and Jiu Ge
I am cringe and I am not even free
Feel free to reuse this idea but 24 hours are not enough for me to finish an entire comic. I could have taken the simpler prompt but nOOOOOO timeloop is too tempting. Past me why are we like this
#svsss#shen jiu#yue qingyuan#qijiu#qijiuweek2024#the basic idea for this was that both yqy and sj remember each loop#the loop started after their individual deaths in PIDW and resets them to close to disciple era#aka the time Yue Qi was in the caves and SJ presumably got away from the Qiu household or was already with Wu Yanzi#I imagine the first few loops they qi deviated so hard from the shock that they didnt even make it like 1 hour in the loop before beingrese#and then had a few loops just fucking around and finding out#eventually they realise that the other has the memories of all loops and so begins the talks and figuring how tf they can get out of this#maybe they resolve their issues with the promise or not your choice tbh#they try different plans and methods#but they keep dying (read: SJ keeps dying first and YQY either dies or sewerslides not soon after) and getting reset with no end in sight#until the last pages where the svsss timeline begins#SJ got replaced with SY and the system isn't letting YQY join him in death or smth nor letting him do anything about SY being there instead#And due to their closeness from being immensily tired from all the loops#YQY notices it immediately but can't do anything about it#the bonus for SY is that this timeline was very kind to LBH & co - 79 figured by now that keeping him in the sect and happy was their best#bet at staying alive - or well at least for longer#I'll continue this storyline in one of the future prompts of this qijiu week#btw the one with the cliff is just the whoopsie daisy timeline where SJ accidentally falls into the Abyss trying to keep LBH from falling i#79 had a bit of a good laugh about that one#cw death#cw violence#cw blood#cw angst
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Been Havin Thoughts™ >.>
About the Tragedy of SI-OC born too late to change anything...
About KNOWING. Exactly what's going to go wrong. Potentially how to fix it. Having a head crammed FULL of hundreds of authors of Fix-Its, Meta discussions, Tumblr posts. Uncertain that it truely WOULD change anything... but? Plans within plans. Possibilities. The options and ability to do SOMETHING. All there.
All useless.
Because... Because, you? You are a child.
Born too late too make a difference. The machinations of monsters are already well underway and it is far too late to stop that trolley, bearing down on you. No. No, now?
Now you get to make a CHOICE.
The needs of the many? The needs of the few? Yourself? Who do you try and save? Who CAN you save? From this sinking ship. This slow, painful, tragedy? No one's going to listen to a child. Not really. Not TRUELY. You are merely... a Witness.
There are SO MANY Scenarios!!!
But! For this? The one that currently haunts me?
Force Nexus~☆ under the Temple~☆! What COULD it do? I wonder?
Imagine it. You are a Youngling. A Temple Child. You KNOW what is coming. Order 66. The suffering. The Death. An empire built on the enslavement of good, loyal men. The genocide of Jedi. Every night you struggle to sleep. Toss and turn. Look at the tiny sleeping faces of children in you Creche... and you KNOW.
You KNOW.
Just as you KNOW... that no one will listen to you. You did try. Carefully. And you are glad you did. Your trust was betrayed. They did not listen. The end barrels closer and closer. The Force WEEPS in your mind, like a wound hidden in smoke. You... you have to decide.
Save yourself? Run? You could. You might survive.
Take the infants? Bundle them away in the night? You'd have to time it just right. Or they'd chase you to the ends of the galaxy.
Or... or do you do... THAT?
The thing that scares you. The one your not sure your brave enough to do. The one that... that would be JEDI of you? You are scared. Just a child. Thought... thought you would have longer...
In your heart... already know. Exactly what you're going to do.
So you sneak out. It's far too easy. With so many minders, away at War. Hang around the Senate. Well away from the Sith. You... you just need the inevitable to happen. Hate yourself, for preying on the Vode. Sure enough? Some asshole orders a good man to be "decommissioned" over imagined offense.
He is escorted away by his brothers.
You follow.
Let them grieve. Before quietly interjecting. You need his help. To save his brothers. Since he is to die either way... would he mind dying with you? You hate asking. What choice does he HAVE now, really? He is condemned. You feel like a monster.
When he asks if you are CERTAIN it will help his brothers, you think of the records you have read. Yes. Yes it will.
He does not look at you, like you are a monster. There is a grieving understanding between instead. You leave at once. Back to the barracks. Things left behind he will not be coming back for. Everytime you leave the temple, you are much the same.
Now you decend.
Down and down. Level by level. Past where the light no longer reaches, past breathable air. To the old temple. Long forgotten. Desecrated by the Sith. You are a youngling. You can not purify this place. But oh... oh you can try. Any spark of Light in this darkness. Like a trail of breadcrumbs, made of stars.
Down and towards the Nexus.
It rattles your bones. Aches in your teeth. Colors beyond color, time outside of time. Every step becomes a struggle. Until it is too much. You must be carried. Your trooper does not mind. Helps you stay present, attached to your skin. Luminous as you are.
You... You get there.
It Is BEAUTIFUL.
The Force is HERE. And Here flows the Force. Everything One. Your lines, simple matter, begin to break. How... how could you possibly care? It is... no. The hand in your's reminds you. Your reason for all of this. The Vode. Their fate. You look to the man who has become your friend. Would weep for him, if you could. But... but it is too late now.
For both of you.
You are One with the Force. And the Force is One with you.
In the starlight, the fracturing, of what's left of your brain... you PULL. The chip. The advanced aging. The shroud the Sith has pulled around himself. All... all things are possible, in the Force. ALL THINGS. Perhaps not all... with flesh and bone... but? With the Force? The... The Vode will be free.
What is distance, mere matter, to The Force?
We are everywhere and nowhere. Everything and nothing. Our power is infinte and killing us. And... and that is okay. It does not hurt. The Light... the Light is BEAUTIFUL. We did this on our own two feet.
We are one with the Force.
And that is okay.
#minji's writing#star wars#the tragedy of SI-OCs#Palpatine eats HARD blasters to the face#the Vode are mandalorian#an adi'ka died for them and they are NOT OKAY#neither are the jedi#tw sui implied#tw death#cause like#they do get fckin atomized#nonpainfully#but still#sacrifice to the Force
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Chen Yi & Ai Di + the respect they command leading Yiyun Meng: North Hall
Chen Bowen as CHEN YI & Chiang Tien as AI DI KISEKI: DEAR TO ME (2023)
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#uservid#userspring#pdribs#userjjessi#userspicy#userrain#*cajedit#*gif#*slaps the roof of my head* this guy can fit so many compilation sets in him#xiao jie best boy award#the last gif when he sees ai di for the first time in four years and hes wiggling his shoulders and smiling so big: CUUUUUUTE#anyway they are loved. also feared but mostly loved#they're respected!!#they follow chen yi into fights without hesitation!#one glare can quell them. one shout. his lead is always followed#sometimes ai di will beat them up so they gotta try hard not to fuck up#but they still love him because he's ai di and he does it because he cares about them. in his own fucked up way#their people take them seriously respect the decisions they make and follow without comment or complaint but with DEVOTED LOYALTY#on this note. give me more gang dynamics or give me death
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i keep thinking about the fact that unlike sy (who never even thought about how his family might feel about him dying), airplane actually had the option to go back to his family and ultimately decided not to.
like imagine being a parent and finding out that your child chose a life that didn’t have you in it.
just think about the guilt that his parents must have felt when they heard the news. each of them are enjoying time with their new families, but they haven’t spoken to their son in a while. he’s in college though so he’s probably fine. he’s not reaching out saying that he needs help or money or anything though he never asked for much when he was home either.
then they get the call. and they find out that he died alone in his apartment. he was electrocuted while trying to salvage his laptop. and they think he didn’t have to die this way. he never asked them for anything, and now they know that he desperately needed them. he never mentioned how much he struggled, and maybe he would have if they had been in contact more often. but they were too caught up in their own lives to pay attention to him.
no parent should have to out-live their child, but they distanced themselves so much from him that they couldn’t even be there for him when he died.
cough your child could have lived a long, happy, & healthy life and eventually die of old age surrounded by people they love. but instead he died when he was young and alone because he didn’t feel comfortable sharing his problems with you cough cough
#this is mostly about airplane’s parents now that i think about it#fuck those guys#shang qinghua#im shaking him aggressively#and the fact that sqh and sqq NEVER mention their ‘past lives’ with each other (iirc) drives me insane#but it’s also. in character for them to do that. as much as i hate it.#Mr. Repression & Mr. God Complex never talk about their feelings?!?!?!#how shocking.#mxtx svsss#svsss extras#svsss book 4#svsss sqh#sqh#svsss#scumbag self saving system#scumbag system#airplane shooting towards the sky#HE DIED ALONE IN HIS APARTMENT CAUSE HE WAS WORKING HIMSELF TO THE BONE TO PAY RENT!!!!!!#i will never get over that.#shen yuan died alone too but his death is shown differently in different medias so its hard to analyze it imo
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just remembered that i can draw literally whatever i want forever
#death note#light yagami#misa amane#yagamane#that’s like my first time using that tag 😳#i should draw more yagamane. like tbh i like it. they both suck and i love that for them#anyway everyone say rip to me and my laptop who died forever and now i’ve lost a bunch of my research and papers and projects#and now i have to find some way to finish my summer classes w/o easy access to all of my stuff while mourning the loss of thousands#of photos and a bunch of large projects i didn’t copy to flash drives recently haha wow life is full of fun surprises that don’t make#everything 100x harder for me haha i am totally not upset by these happenings and i totally don’t regret neglecting to make physical#backups of all of my work haha and i totally don’t regret not getting my laptop checked out before her hard drive fried hahahahaha#anyway. misa putting a leash on light should’ve happened in canon. 🫵 you agree
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"You're more than what you're going through. And you wear it well."
#dragon age: the veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#datv rook#rookcanis#gamingedit#datvedit#uservorgoth#userstar#usertogepies#usermoxie#usermojaves#.gfx#🫣#c: lleyth de riva#🖤: a murder of crows#i've died 50000 bajillion deaths. i think i was born under an evil star#and i spent like 3 hours in photoshop on this and i think it sucks. it is what it is#watching lucanis go thru the full spectrum of human emotion kills me. i need to kiss whoever animated his expressions#the way he grimaces and then smiles 😭😭😭 and looks so in love. bashing my head against a concrete wall so hard it leaves a crater#and then they KISSED and everything was fine and they DIDNT get scared 1 inch apart and spook each other like wild horses#and then run off to go shiver and scamper about it in their rooms.#🧍<- in denial#a heem heem. whimper#also im obsessed with their height difference (aka the lack thereof)#lleyth is literally the shortest person in the group aside from harding. so the shortest non-dwarf#and lucanis is BARELY taller than them ASHGSDJHHFJDJKD the second he leans it's so over. we need to get him a box to stand on#ok im sorry ill shut up 🧍 flinging this at the dash and running away#datv spoilers#sorry im insane about a fictional man from my video game do u guys still like me
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Whenever I see a post about Chief Hiccup (or watch Httyd 2, for that matter) I'm always reminded of how Stoick did not want his son to become chief the way he did.
Maybe it's because Stoick saw his reluctance to succeed him, maybe it's something Stoick went through himself when he became chief and he wanted to spare his son the pain, but he had a plan. He was going to retire. Step down and let Hiccup take over in his stead. That way, his father could ease him into this insanely big responsibility, could be there to guide him, help him with the tough stuff he knows Hiccup might have trouble with.
Except, then he dies at Drago's hands. And Hiccup ends up thrusted into a position a feared to be in. And yeah, he does it mostly alone, just as his father did before him, which is exactly what Stoick was hoping to avoid.
#in the shows stoick has the council but hiccup mentions that his father just ignores them whenever it suits him#and gobber doesn't count either because gobber helped stoick with hiccup specifically#we have no idea which role valka plays in all of this but stoick chiefed 20 years without her#and with berk's past with dragons there's the likelihood that stoick became chief because his own father died#and as for hiccup he feared the position because he wasn't sure if he could be the chief his father was#because he and his father are so different in his eyes#completely missing their similarities as well as the differences that could actually benefit berk and have been benefitting berk#i just feel like hiccup wouldn't have such a hard time or even take his ascension as hard if it wasn't for his father's untimely death#httyd movies#httyd 2#how to train your dragon 2#hiccup haddock#stoick the vast#the haddocks
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Man, rdr2 has really cursed us with mourning a man that died theoretically 125 years ago
#arthur oh arthur#listen I sobbed hard at johns death and everyone else's death#but arthurs?#a part of me dies when I see clips of his last breaths#irreversible damage has been done to my brain#oh arthur#mick squeaks#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#arthur morgan#red dead redemption community#red dead redemption 2 spoilers
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the way harding goes in so aggro on lucanis right off the bat (lmao I love you too harding it's good to know you always have my back❤️️I am trying to score here tho sooo pls don't actually shoot him maybe?) and then fairly quickly she's clearly like '...oh no he's like. sad sad huh :(' hfhaskjfa. one (1) nice solid sensible fereldan girl saddled with the burden of having to rep the southern attitude towards spirits in a sea of mourn watchers and other assorted freaks and doing her damn best to be firm but fair even so. I love these two so much tho, the way their friendship develops is everything. he makes her a guard in his mind because he trusts that she would never let anything out that could hurt someone he loves, he knows she WOULD use the arrow. and she knows it wouldn't even be his fault if she had to..... the early phase here is such a mutual state of 'you know what. that's incredibly fucked up and also incredibly sweet'
#has anyone ever delivered an overt death threat with such adorable girl next door swag yet full intention of following through#has anyone received an overt death threat with such an air of 'awww. thanks. I really appreciate that. go for center mass btw#there'd probably be no time to focus in on a headshot. also it could get kind of messy with the explosive arrow thing' energy#Them.#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#lace harding#a bit disappointed he didn't have anything to say after she died in my playthrough but also very in character#if he couldn't bring himself to say anything yet. it's just going to be rye and lucanis being real sad about harding for a while#but at least being sad together which is a HUGE development for both of them great stuff lol#I got the coffee people pleaser convo and harding's loyalty quest back to back in my first playthrough so it was just like.#the bonding play session of all time between all three of them rook harding and lucanis creating some bonds that can never be broken#even if. ouch ow aaaaaaah argh. and so on and so forth. haunted by where i know I'm headed forever now
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I think one of the most interesting ways to write Steve’s parents (or his mom, at least) is as a deeply flawed person with good intentions.
Don’t get me wrong, I love a fic where they’re just bad people. Sometimes that’s all you need for a good story and this is not a criticism of anybody’s interpretation.
My personal preference in writing his parents is as people who are trying to be good parents.
Like, im currently messing around with this AU concept where Steve has a really complicated family dynamic. In it, he has bad parents. His mother made a choice to follow her husband because she thinks it’s the only way to preserve her marriage and thus preserve a good life for her son. It’s not malicious neglect but it is neglect. She’s trying to do the right thing but she’s making the wrong decisions. In the end, she’s still hurting her child.
A couple years ago I wrote this fic about Steve spiraling into a severe depression and his parents are trying to help him. They just don’t listen. They don’t understand what he’s dealing with and they make the wrong choices when trying to help him. Everybody that tries to help him makes the wrong choices, but with the best of intentions. Steve says repeatedly throughout the fic that it’s not his parents fault they don’t know how to be parents.
It’s really fun to write and it’s really cathartic if your relationship with your parents isn’t easy.
#I’m very lucky to have great parents but I don’t have parents who really understand me#so you know…✨inspiration✨#I also have an unfinished companion piece to a fic where Steve is dying#and in the foc Steve talks about his dad going out of town while his son is actively dying#he mentions that his dad had watched both his parents die slow deaths and implies that his parents are killing his in their minds to#make it easier when he actually dies. which isn’t a good to do but it is an incredible hard situation to be in#people don’t make the right choices all the time and I think it’s an interesting place to explore in your writing#again this isn’t like a diss at people who write them as like evil#I do that too. there’s not a lot of depth to his parents in the tiktok saga#steve harrington
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Imagine being such a horn dog that you rizz death herself.
Death: You're dead and burried, darling~
Wade wilson: And bricked! Hello!!
#deathpool#lady death#wade wilson#you fucking dog you#shes gonna fuck him so hard when he dies#i just know it#deadpool#lady death marvel
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Do you think. That after Sanji asked Zoro to kill him. He took a moment wonder if, had Kuina lived to adulthood, at the end of their journey, would whoever killed Mihawk first have to fight the other to protect their title? Do you think the next time they fought after Sanji’s request, Kitetsu would cut just a little too close to Sanji’s throat, because her master was too preoccupied thinking, would I have been able to do it? Kill her, if it came to that? For my dream? and later when he’s carefully wiping Sanji’s blood off his blade, do you think, that maybe he would think- the dream was hers before it was mine. Would I have felt betrayed, then, if she killed me? Or proud? Pleased? Happy?
When Sanji interrupts his thoughts to say, what the hell has got you so distracted? Am I too boring for you to take seriously? do you think Zoro would glare at him in silence cause there’s no way for him to articulate that he’s never taken anything more seriously in his life.
#Sanji and Kuina taking up the same space in Zoro’s brain my absolute beloved.#Like yeah there’s also a parallel you can make between Kuina and Luffy in how they represent Zoro’s dreams but#Their dynamic as friends is different#Zoro is able to communicate rather freely with Luffy#With Sanji its more of the same thrown insults and play fights and secret admiration and inability to say the word ‘friend’#and now I’m thinking about how Kuina died the same night her and Zoro spoke honestly for the first time#and I wonder if Zoro regrets that#I WONDER if he didnt realize he has a second chance at fixing it until Sanji’s life was placed in real danger#This is all so hard for me to articulate does anyone get it. Hello. Hello?#one piece#roronoa zoro#blackleg sanji#shimotsuki kuina#zosan#cause a death pact is always romantic#my post
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