#death by poison dart frog

[sassygwaine]

“there’s no doubt about it. it’s frogs.”

[thatoneluckybee]

tumblr is trying to informally banish you ,,, so sad, ,,,,,

I was too whimsical and engaged in too much tomfoolery, they don’t want me 💔

[cozy-cinnamon-roll]

We Interrupt This Broadcast...

(Another two-part-er! Stay tuned for part 2 very shortly!)

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel

Pairing: Ler!Rosie, Ler!OC, Lee!Alastor (strictly platonic)

Content/Trigger Warnings: tickling, very brief blood mention, medical themes (non-graphic & painless). One comically graphic description of cannibalism (first paragraph). Also, this is set right after Alastor gets his ass handed to him by Adam, so you can expect a lil angst sprinkled in there (don't worry, he gets better).

If there are any trigger warnings you'd like me to add in the future (and/or to this fic), PLEASE let me know! I am always happy to oblige. 💕

This is a ticklefic! If that's not your cup of tea, kindly move along.

Ok... I'm gonna be honest folks, I have no idea if this fic is even coherent. This ain't my Best Work™ - this is literally the coping mechanism I've been relying on to put myself to sleep every night this week because HOLY SHIT my life is stressful at the moment. 😅

But anyway, I've decided I'm just gonna go ahead and post it, because 1) the world needs more lee!alastor, and 2) I'm not here to do my Best Work™, I'm here to write cute self-indulgent little stories about Alastor getting tickled to bits by his platonic wife. I'm here to decompress my hypervigilant ass at the end of long days by imagining my favorite endearingly creepy characters get wrecked by my other favorite endearingly creepy characters.

In summary, I'm here to have a good time, and I certainly did with this fic. So I hope you do too!

Featuring my new oc! (Rosie and Al still take center stage though, don't worry lol)

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It's a little-known fact that cannibals make terrific doctors. When you spend every meal tearing the human body apart with your face, you end up with a pretty comprehensive intuition for demonic anatomy.

So Alastor supposed he should consider himself lucky to have Rosie and her loyal posse so close at hand after his battle with Adam.

He was certainly relieved when Rosie had stumbled upon him, barely conscious from blood loss on the floor of his wrecked radio tower - and especially a few hours later when, having been rushed back to Cannibal Town, he was whisked into a warm, familiar parlor and deposited on a comfy couch.

Within minutes Rosie had summoned a woman in a white coat who swooped in, produced a bottle of a strange, foul-smelling gel from her medicine bag, soaked a rag with it, and pressed it firmly against Alastor's wound. The searing pain evaporated almost on contact.

"What is that?" Alastor breathes, visibly relaxing against the arm of the couch he's propped against.

"Anesthetic." She begins preparing a needle and thread.

"Didn't know such a thing existed down here."

"Of course! We're demons, not barbarians," Rosie scoffs, watching from the sidelines.

Cannibals, as a rule, rarely last long enough to need a doctor, but Rosie is no ordinary cannibal. And Dr. Trudy Sawblade - a young surgical resident in life, and Rosie's personal physician in death - is the best of the best. While she hadn't quite completed her medical training before her untimely death, in Rosie's service she's gained more than enough experience to make up for her education cut short.

"That salve is derived from a distant cousin of the poison dart frog. Evidently most of the frogs are assholes, because hell has an downright enormous population of them." Trudy's voice is measured and matter-of-fact, with a soft lilt that is both soothing and vaguely unsettling. "Haven't been discovered on earth yet. Which is good, because one whiff of this would end a mortal life in a matter of seconds."

"Lucky you, you're already dead," Rosie chimes in cheerfully.

"Lucky me," Alastor murmurs, without conviction.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Truthfully, with the pain from his chest wound numbed, the weight of his recent defeat presses even more heavily on Alastor's heart. Someone - probably one of the cannibals who helped transport him from the rubble pile to Rosie's parlor - must have grabbed the broken microphone as they carried him out, because the fractured pieces are sitting on the side table at the other end of the couch. Under normal circumstances the awareness that someone had touched his staff without permission would spark a flash of rage from the Radio Demon, but now he can only stare dismally at what remains of his cane - aware that it's no longer capable of accomplishing much anyway.

It takes only a few minutes for Trudy to stitch Alastor back up and wrap his chest in a stretchy gauze. Meanwhile, Rosie quickly mends the worst of the tears in his clothes - if only to avoid having to watch her friend stare down the couch at his broken staff, with an uncharacteristic half-smile that damn near breaks her heart.

"Alright, sir, that should do it for now. It's a nasty gash, for sure, but the salve should keep it from getting infected."

"Thank you, my dear." He gives an appreciative nod to the surgeon, and Rosie too, as his fellow overlord hands him back his clothes.

"Can't have you going around with a big hole in your chest, can we?" Rosie steps back and scrutinizes her own patch job as he slowly dresses himself again. "It ain't perfect... especially for a classy fellow like you. But I'm sorry to report that I saw my tailor at a Sunday brunch just last week. Inconvenient, but I gotta admit, he made a wonderful casserole."

For the briefest of moments, this aside manages to tweak Alastor's smile into something vaguely genuine. "I'm sure he did."

"One more thing, Mr. Alastor, sir," Trudy jumps in as the radio demon pulls on his coat. "So sorry, I almost forgot. The angel also threw you against a wall, correct?"

At the recollection, Alastor's smile stiffens into something more closely resembling a grimace. His antlers rise between his ears. "Does it matter?"

"You may be at risk for internal injuries." If Trudy is at all fazed by inviting the most powerful overlord in hell's annoyance, it doesn't show. "I really ought to check, just to be safe."

Alastor looks away. As loathe as he is to even acknowledge his own fragility, he truly isn't sure of the extent of his own injuries - given that he's not used to receiving them in the first place. And he'd be damned (well, damned twice) if Adam had ruptured something vital, spelling the radio demon's second death a few hours after the fact.

He grits his teeth. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt."

"Lovely. If you could just lie back, sir..." As he obliges, she kneels beside the couch. "I'm just going to feel for any swelling..." Her hands hover over him-

"Er, wait." Alastor abruptly sits up.

"It's alright, I won't touch your wound!" Trudy soothes. "I'll just be feeling down here..." She gestures to his midsection (which elicits a sharp flinch).

"No, I-" He hesitates. "I'm... not sure this is necessary."

"Oh, Alastor, stop worryin'!" Rosie reassures him with a friendly pat on the shoulder. "Trudy is quite picky about her meals. She'd never go for venison."

"That's... not what..."

Alastor pauses, and evidently decides against trying to explain what he meant. He reluctantly lies back against the cushions again.

"I'm going to place my hands under your shirt, sir. If you feel any pain, please alert me."

"Very well."

As Trudy lifts his shirt, he looks like he is going to say something more - but whatever it is dies on his tongue the moment her hands make contact with his stomach. He brings one knee up sharply.

"Tender there, sir?"

"No! No, your hands are cold." His words have gone uncharacteristically stiff.

Trudy methodically probes one side of his belly, then the other (which in turn causes his other knee to pop up). This time when Trudy asks if he's in pain, he merely shakes his head.

The surgeon furrows her brow, concentrating. Human-animal hybrids like Alastor already take a bit of poking around just to get a sense for each unique configuration of organs. It doesn't help that the man is bracing for every touch...

"Are you sure this doesn't hurt, sir?" she murmurs tentatively. "You're very tense."

"Yes." The word comes out like a hiss. She glances at the radio demon's face. He's wearing his typical showman's smile, but his eyes are fixed on the ceiling with a weird, wide, unwavering stare.

Finally the surgeon sits back. "Well, I don't feel anything concerning. But to be honest, sir, I can't feel much of anything." She turns apologetically to her employer. "His stomach is all clenched up..."

But Rosie is simply standing there pressing a huge grin into her glove. She's known Alastor for decades. She can read his expressions like a magazine.

"Alastor, darling," Rosie drawls casually. "Are you ticklish?"

From the radio demon's reaction, you'd think she'd asked if he was an Exorcist. He scrambles to sit up. "No! Why would-"

"You're ticklish. That's..." She catches herself just before the word precious.

"...What?!" There's an edge of defensiveness to his voice that Rosie very rarely hears from him.

"Why are you embarrassed?"

"I'm not emb- That's not- what-" Oh, she's giving him that look. "I'm just- I wasn't-"

As he speaks, Alastor's voice suddenly goes thin. His gaze turns inward. "I'm stuttering. I don't stutter! I've never stuttered!" He clutches his coat closer around himself. "I am the RADIO DEMON, for heaven's sake, I don't sta-AHH! Haha-!"

Evidently a scribble to the ribs is a very effective way to interrupt a panicking demon. Rosie runs her fingers from his hip up his side to his arm and back a couple times for good measure.

The amount of startled laughter she is able to draw from just this surprise touch delights her - the poor man is so ridiculously sensitive that a five-second one-handed tickle leaves him fully breathless.

"Okay! Okay, okahay! Keheh- Rosie!"

"Sorry dear, couldn't resist." She holds her hands up, still beaming like a stadium light. "I'll stop torturing you."

Alastor clears his throat. "You're not torturing me, dearest." He straightens his bowtie, clearly attempting to salvage his dignity. "You know what I always say, laughter is a powerful sign of-"

He cuts off with a sharp inhale and defensive flinch as Rosie perches on the edge of the sofa beside Trudy. She grins.

"You're right. That's certainly your specialty, isn't it?"

Alastor forces a nervous chuckle. "Never fully dressed without a smile, you know."

"Well don't worry, darling. I understand." She pats his knee. "Just because you've got the scariest evil cackle in hell doesn't mean you appreciate having it tickled out of you."

Rosie had expected this assurance to put him at ease, but if anything, he seems more troubled.

"Why would I mind a little, ah..." Tickling. Tick-ling. He can't bring himself to articulate two syllables. Is this all he's left with without his staff? "...Er, a little bit of levity? Can't let things get too serious, can we?" With another quick cough, the radio demon finally manages to get his voice to fall back into his familiar breezy cadence. He turns to Trudy. "Now, are we... quite finished with that examination?"

"Nothing seems amiss, from what I can feel." Trudy takes a step back. "Which is not much, but I think I've already made you uncomfortable enough..."

"Nonsense! I'm perfectly at ease!" He lies back again and smooths his coat. "Please, finish your little checkup. I insist."

Trudy regards him curiously for a moment. "Right." Her hands hover over his belly again. "But if you want me to stop, sir, just say the word-"

"I assure you that w-won't be necessahary..."

Trudy watches him seize up before her fingers even make contact. This time she presses a little deeper into his belly, trying to feel around his defensiveness.

"You are punching holes in my couch," Rosie remarks dryly, watching the poor demon's claws bury themselves in the cushions.

"I kn... ohow, I'm just-" He squeezes his eyes shut as Trudy hits a particularly bad spot. And then another. And another... hell, his torso one big bad spot.

"What do you think, Trudy?"

The young doctor just shakes her head.

"Alastor. Darling. You have GOT to relax."

"I am!" Alastor's composure is dangling by the thinnest of threads.

"Maybe it would help," Trudy says, with infinite caution, "to just go ahead and laugh, sir."

A beat. And then Rosie bursts into laughter.

"Giving new meaning to the 'deer in the headlights' expression, my friend." She scoots closer. "I thought you just said you don't mind a little 'levity'..."

"I don't!"

"In that case. Carry on, Trudy - Auntie Rosie is gonna help our patient out a bit while you work."

Too late, Alastor realizes what his fellow overlord has in mind. "Wait, wait! Ros-"

A delicate set of nails find the region just under his ribs - and it's all downhill from there.

"Ah! Fuhuck!" Alastor chokes on a curse before he can catch himself. He twists sideways, collapses into muffled giggles, and briefly manages to pull himself together - just barely - with a few hyperventilated breaths. "Rosie, really! This isn't- please- ack! I can't-" There's that damn stutter again. He hadn't even stuttered when Adam slashed him.

And now, Great Alastor the Radio Demon, undone by some scribbles? And a medical exam?!

Meanwhile, Trudy can feel even less now than she could before, her patient's belly now quaking with silent, suppressed mirth. But she takes one look at Rosie's delighted expression... and continues probing anyway, curling a subtle little smirk of her own.

It seems Rosie has picked up on a slightly less tangible injury than anything Trudy can address. But fortunately, they've just stumbled upon a promising potential treatment.

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Part 2 is already pretty much finished - my brain is just too mushy at this point to contend with Tumblr's shitty text interface any longer, and this feels like a good stopping point.

Lemme get a good night sleep and another dose of Prozac and I'll have the rest out shortly 😅

💜 - Cozy

[jadafitch]

DANGEROUS STUFF!

For Halloween, a pattern of some of the most poisonous, venomous & toxic plants & animals in the world... geographic cone snail, poison fire coral fungi, golden dart frog, voodoo lily, castor bean plant, deathstalker scorpion, deadly nightshade, Brazilian wandering spider, lily of the valley, oleander, redback spider, banded krait, autumn skullcap, diamondback rattlesnake, death cap, angel's trumpets, stonefish, poison hemlock, box jelly, blue-ringed octopus.

Prints, Tees & More

[supermassivebaseballscene]

I’m back after 2 years for one little post because I’m rereading life and death and I’m at the point where Beau sees Edythe’s skin for the first time in the sun and oh my gosh it reminds me of how much I hate the sentiment of the “stupid sparkly vampire” when Stephenie literally revolutionized the classic predator!!! No longer a creepy crawly thing that hides in the shadows but a flashy, beautiful, alluring animal that lures you into its trap. If Edythe/Edward had truly been evil or a “true vampire” it would have been all too easy to get Beau/Bella and that’s why they were designed that way. A peacock or poison dart frog ready to lure its prey. It’s an entirely new take on such a classic beast and I’m sorry that the world wasn’t ready for it. God these books might just pull me back into its clutches 😭

[lifesteal-headcanons]

what I hc each lifestealer as

Minutetech - wither skeleton hybrid or fallen angel/angel of death

Clownperice - Devil

Jumperwho - jumping mouse hybrid

Kaboodle - cottontail bunny hybrid

Pentar - human with corruption on his gloved hand (cedit to another hc)

Planetlord - space entity/alien

Spoke - voidling

mapicc - dog demon hybrid

parrot - parrot hybrid

Mid - black cat hybrid

zam - blob

woogie - polar bear hybird

branzy - human that has the marks on his arms becasue he made a deal with a devil (clown)

Bacon - piglin hybrid

redd - blaze hybrid

4C - slime

spep - slime

rekrap - jackalope hybrid

Ashswag - glitch

squiddo - orange beetle or orange poisonous dart frog

chief - statue that came to life

ecorridor - a doll

manepear - lion

flamefrags - tiger demon

derap - kangaro hybird

thats all I can think of for now, might come back if i think of more

.

[acescorazon]

I LOVE YOUR FIC CHANGES!!!!! I HOPE YOU UPDATE SOON!!!!!

THANK U BBYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. ILY MUAH. I was updating like every day but then i got my period... i mean i fell into a pit of darkness and didn't have the energy to climb out. How bizarre. ANYWAYS, HERE'S YOUR FOOD.

Title: Changes Ch: 5/?

Rating: M (I'm just putting that as the rating in general for every ch lol)

Word count:2291

Warnings: Depressed clown :(

Chapter excerpt:

"Mihawk keeps asking about you," Mohji announces all of a sudden, "He keeps asking if you're okay and if your illness is something serious." Hawkeye keeps asking about him… Why? To know if he's died yet? What a joke! That man doesn't care about Buggy, why is he even wasting his breath asking about him? "I just keep telling him that you have the flu, and he's always like, 'Ah…is that so? Tell him I hope he feels better.' Isn't that…ridiculous?!" Yeah, that is rather ridiculous.  Buggy has a hard time believing that Mihawk is genuinely concerned about him, but at the same time, he can't imagine why he'd just pretend to care either. It's weird.

|Ch1|Ch2|Ch3|Ch4|

The next several days are on an endless loop for Buggy. He stays in bed all day, unwilling to come face to face with Mihawk after his little drunken rant from days prior, afraid of what Mihawk will say to him now that he's completely sober. So, he stays in bed, either sleeping or lost in thought. He should be preparing men, supplies, and their new flagship for departure, but he can't bring himself to do it. At the very least he should be making sure everything on Emptee Bluffs Island is going smoothly, and yet… he doesn't care about that either. 

Being in Cross Guild is so…exhausting.

Crocodile has called for meetings every single day, and every day, Buggy has one of his men lie and say he's sick. He's missed about 10 meetings now, he thinks. He can't remember, everything is starting to blend in together. All he knows is that sooner or later Crocodile is going to get pissed and come looking for him, and then what? Beat him up? Threaten him? Actually, kill him this time? 

Man, who cares?

Cabaji, Mohji, and Richie, often come by and sit with him, usually overly worried about Buggy's well-being and not believing him when he says he's just sick or tired, but of course, Buggy always tells them that he's fine. 

Today, they're with him again, sitting by his bed and trying to get him to eat some of the sea king the other members of the crew somehow caught and killed today. "Captain…" Mohji sighs, "Come on, at least take a couple of bites." He asks, but he sounds more like he's begging than asking. "You've hardly eaten anything these last few days." While that is very true, it's because Buggy doesn't have much of an appetite these days, nothing tastes right or really interests him, and god knows he doesn't have the energy to make his own food…just… he just wants to sleep.

Buggy sits in his bed, slightly peeved that Cabaji and Mohji insist he sit up in general, and looks down at the sea king on his plate. He's not normally a picky eater, you can't be picky when you've spent most of your life at sea, but… this thing reminds him eerily of a poison dart frog with its vibrant color and spots, yet at the same time, it's got fins and a body like a snake... He doubts his men would actually cook up something poisonous, they aren't that naive…but still, Buggy has no interest in this fish..frog…snake thing. 

But if he did die from ingesting it…that'd just be his luck, wouldn't it? Death seems… inescapable at this point, and he often wonders just what or who will end up taking his life first. "I'm not hungry," Buggy repeats, but Mohji and Cabaji seem determined today.

 

"Just take a couple of bites, please, Captain?" Mohji practically begs, "Just a couple, it's actually really good!" Doubt it, Buggy thinks. 

Cabaji follows suit, "Yeah, just take a couple of bites and if you don't like it, you don't have to eat the whole thing! We'll just feed the rest to Richie, right, Mohji?" 

"Right!" 

Buggy really doesn't want to eat anything, but he hates to make the other two worry, so he ends up taking a couple of bites of his lunch, and yeah, it isn't bad…it's one of the better-tasting sea kings that he's had, this one actually tastes like chicken despite its weird appearance, but Buggy still only eats a couple of bites, just enough to get the other two off his back and then hands Mohji his plate to give to Richie. 

He wants to lie back down, but the others won't let him. "Um, Captain?" Cabaji calls out, seemingly a little nervous, "Uh, how about I run you a warm bath and…uh, How about I help you wash and brush your hair today?" Cabaji suggests with a small grin. Oh, yeah, basic needs are a thing. Man, Buggy really doesn't care about any of that stuff anymore, he's going to die anyways, so what's the point? He'll just ask one of his men to make him look nice for his funeral. 

"Okay?" Cabaji asks, still smiling.

Buggy understands what this really is about. This is a very polite and roundabout way of telling him he needs to bathe, but none of his men would ever outright tell him he stinks so they have to use words like, 'Oh, how about I run you a bath and help you wash your hair today?' Or, 'Wow, you look like you need to relax…how about a nice bath?' 

Whatever. 

Buggy lets Cabaji run him a bath, and he sits and waits in bed while he prepares everything for him. He watches Richie eat his leftover sea king, and can't help but think how nice it'd be to be a lion, well, actually a cat. If reincarnation exists, he thinks he'd like to live a carefree life as a cat, a spoiled one too. Being a pirate isn't something he thinks he'd want to do again unless he could live a life with his old crew again, this time a happy one that isn't cut short, maybe then he'd be a pirate again... Or he could be a star in the sky, that'd be nice. 

"Mihawk keeps asking about you," Mohji announces all of a sudden, "He keeps asking if you're okay and if your illness is something serious." Hawkeye keeps asking about him… Why? To know if he's died yet? What a joke! That man doesn't care about Buggy, why is he even wasting his breath asking about him? "I just keep telling him that you have the flu, and he's always like, 'Ah…is that so? Tell him I hope he feels better.' Isn't that…ridiculous?!" Yeah, that is rather ridiculous.  Buggy has a hard time believing that Mihawk is genuinely concerned about him, but at the same time, he can't imagine why he'd just pretend to care either. It's weird.

"Crocodile has asked about you too, but only once, and when I told him you had the flu, he rolled his eyes at me and went: 'Of course that dumb clown is sick.' And then walked away! I tell ya, I don't know what the others see in those two!" Mohji frowns, "They're so mean to you! I… I think if we all banned together then we could…you know…." He whispers the next part of his sentence, "Show them who's boss."

Honestly if Buggy thought he and or his crew had a chance against Mihawk and Crocodile, then he would have had both of them taken out a long time ago, but he knows even with an army of men, he couldn't take out one of his business partners, let alone both. It's a fun thought though, "Let's not waste our time," Buggy replies, exhaling a long, shaky sigh, "Besides, it's like I told you before, I can handle those two! Do you really think I'd let them beat and bully me?!" 

Mohji just stares at him from his seat, obviously not convinced but he doesn't push the subject any further, and thank God for that.

Cabaji reappears a few moments after that, telling Buggy his bathwater is ready, and in all honesty, Buggy rather not do this, but he doesn't feel like hearing the other two complain either. He follows Cabaji into the bathroom and tells him he can at least bathe himself, and somewhere at the back of Buggy's mind he feels like he should feel more ashamed by the situation, but he doesn't. His former captain always told him that good friends don't judge you when you're at your lowest times and that they instead help you when no one else will, and so maybe that's why he has no guilt about letting Cabaji wash his hair. He'd do the same for him and then some. He and Mohji are more than just subordinates, they're friends, no, they're family, and honestly Buggy doesn't deserve either one of them. 

As he washes Buggy's hair, Cabaji also tells Buggy that Mihawk keeps asking about him. Again, Buggy finds the idea of Mihawk asking all of Buggy’s crew about his well-being almost comical. Did the world’s strongest swordsman grow a heart? Ha, as if. Or maybe Buggy’s earlier suspicions are correct, maybe Mihawk’s waiting, hoping that Buggy’s ‘flu’ will take him out and that he won’t have to deal with him anymore, which honestly seems like a more realistic explanation for everything. 

A hot bath and a nice relaxing hair wash later, and Buggy’s sitting on the small couch in his room, getting his hair brushed by Cabaji as he listens to both Mohji and Cabaji ramble on about this and that, and occasionally bicker over trivial things. It feels like his men are the only consistency in his life, but he wonders if there will be a day when even that changes. Maybe he’ll end up with so many men that their crew will seem more like an army than a family, then again maybe he won’t live to see the day when that’s actually a problem. And if that doesn’t happen, then maybe Mihawk will eventually end up replacing Buggy’s crew with a new, more efficient one that he hardly knows let alone can consider his family…who knows?

Now, as stated before, Buggy’s usual visitors consist of Mohji, Cabaji and Richie, but today Buggy finds himself getting an additional guest in his room. Sometime around late afternoon Alvida joins Buggy’s already boisterous company, and as soon as she realizes Buggy’s perfectly fine, she sighs at him,”I knew you weren’t sick.” she mutters as she has a seat on the couch next to him after Cabaji and Mohji fight over who’s spot she can take, “But oh well, you won’t believe what I just saw.” She says, grinning. 

Hopefully, she saw Crocodile and Mihawk board a ship and sail as far away from the island as possible, never to return again, but that’s just not realistic, is it? “What did you see?” Buggy asks though he’s not particularly curious about her gossip today.

“Mihawk and Crocodile were fighting.”

“Crocodile and Mihawk bicker every once in a while, so what?” 

“No, they were actually physically fighting earlier.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know but they were both heated,” Alvida claims, “I think they reached a draw, but they were fighting for a long time, half the island saw it.”

Despite claiming that he doesn’t care about either of the two, Buggy’s slightly curious about Mihawk and Crocodile’s altercation. Sure they’ve butt heads a couple of times in the past because Crocodile is so damn overbearing and of course, Mihawk doesn’t take being bossed around lightly, but they never get physical with things, it’s usually just threats of possible fights that don’t go anywhere. Maybe that was it, maybe Crocodile just got too controlling again, and Mihawk got tired of it. He did say he was tired of Crocodile’s shit the other day… Yeah, that’s got to be it…Because what else could it be???

…

A couple of more days go by after that, and Buggy’s still stuck in that same loop: Sleep. Overthink. Sleep. Overthink. Sleep. Overthink. Of course, there are brief things that break the cycle like Mohji and Cabaji checking on him and feeding him and making sure he’s being taken care of, but other than that, it’s just sleep, overthink, repeat. He just doesn’t see the point in getting out of bed every day when Mihawk and Crocodile are just going to make his life a living hell, or worse, end his miserable existence. 

Despite all his stress though, there are times when his bedroom is rather comforting, he knows that it offers him no real protection from the outside world, but in his room he feels safe and like he’s miles away from all his problems even though they’re literally just right outside. He thinks he’s missed, hm…12 meetings now, maybe 13 …14? Who knows, he’s surprised that Crocodile is even still calling for them, or that he hasn’t come barging into his room to yank him out of his bed and beat him to death for ruining his perfect schedule.

Buggy doesn’t care about Cross Guild though (or for much of anything right now) he never has and he doubts he ever will. He’s perfectly fine just keeping himself locked away in his bedroom for as long as possible. Mohji will take care of the others and if he doesn’t, then Alvida will, and if she doesn’t, then Buggy’s sure that Crocodile and Mihawk will boss his men around, but they’re strong, spirited, and oblivious, they can handle anything. 

Something breaks his seemingly endless depressive cycle by the time he’s missed 18 meetings…or was it 19?

One of his men comes into his room around midmorning, like always, and tells him that a meeting has been called… But today, Mihawk’s the one who’s called for the meeting apparently, and Buggy instantly tells his subordinate to tell Mihawk that he’s still under the weather and can’t go to the meeting, to which his subordinate replies, “He says it’s urgent, Chairman Buggy, and that if you can’t go to the meeting room, that he’ll bring the meeting here instead.”

That’s got to be the worst, no, actually, the second worst thing he’s been told in his entire life. Why? Why now? Why can’t Mihawk and Crocodile just hold their dumb meetings by themselves? It’s not like Buggy gets to make any decisions or his input matters, why does he have to leave his safe space and go see them?

((A/n: Hate how they didn't add ChouChou to the live-action or Richie. The idea that some of you might not know that Richie is a lion and you might think he's just some guy is funny though lol.))

[aestheticaxolotl]

Wings of Fire Drug Headcanons

Dragon drugs are wild Seawings- Jellyfish, Sea Urchin, Little Spinefish, Psychedelic Frogfish, Synchiropus Spendidus, and Pufferfish are the most popular forms of drugs in the seawing kingdom. Most law enforcement will arrest dragons with the position of these fish and the average term in prison for these drugs is 4-6 months. Medics and other forms of doctoral care are allowed to host and keep these drugs for pain reduction uses but must have a license and a clean record, along with permission from the queen to hold. Seawing drugs are the second most powerful drugs in the kingdoms and are sold on a black market to the other kingdoms alongside the Rainwings. Most seawings have a higher tolerance to these drugs than other tribes, so when a dragon from a different tribe takes too much of these drugs, they often wind up overdosing and dying if not reached quick enough. Skywings- Hooded pitohui, European Quail, and Little Shrike-thrush are the choice drugs in the Skywing kingdoms. These birds are highly toxic to dragons outside of the sky kingdom, even hybrids struggle to cope with these drugs. Most sky dragons avoid using these forms of drugs, except outside of medical use on other tribes, because if taken too often or in high dosage they can lead to death. The use of these drugs is not outlawed in the Kingdom of the Sky since not many dragons take these drugs. Rainwings- Rainwings have two categories of drugs, Amphibia and Floral. Golden Poison Dart Frog, Blue Poison Dart Frog, Strawberry Poison Dart Frog, and Pickerel Frog are the most commonly found drugs in the rainwing kingdoms. These frogs are often not limited since they do no harm to the rainwings taking them. However, they are highly toxic to dragons outside of the rainwing kingdom and not sold on the black market to the tribes. These frogs are not monitored in the rain kingdom and there are no regulations on drug use, that is why the overdose rate in the rainwing tribe is so high. Salcia Divinorum, Peyote, Opium Poppies, Cannabis Sativa, Nicotiana Tabacum, Dura Stramonium, Psilocybin Mushrooms, and Myristica Fragrant are the flora drugs in the rainwing kingdom and can be sold on the black market to the other tribes. These plants can be used in many forms that do not require eating such as inhalation, injection, and consumption. Just like the amphibian drugs, these are not regulated or monitored in the rainwing kingdom. The rainforest is the drug capital of the dragon kingdoms and the center of the black market, the queens do not shut this down due to the mass increase of income to all the kingdoms. Icewings- Icewings are HARD on the NO DRUG RULES. The only animal in the ice kingdom that anyone can think of is Orcas. Orca whales are hard to hunt in the ice kingdom and only Icewings can take this form of drug, however, it is outlawed in the ice kingdom to take these drugs. Icewings frown heavily on the use of drugs and it is a criminal offense to use with punishment ranging between 6 and 14 months in prison with probation after release.

Sandwings- Africanized Bee, Coral Snake, Gila Monster, and Hyenas are the choice drugs of the Sandwings with a bit of a mixed reaction towards the collective whole of the kingdom. Some dragons want a ban on drug use excluding medical use while others do not see it as a major problem. Sandwings tend to get most of their drugs from the black market and trade their own drugs since it is not as toxic as most other drugs from other kingdoms.

Mudwings- Mambas, Puffer Adders, Carpet Vipers, and Platypus are the drugs of the mud kingdom and are often monitored heavily by law enforcement. The mudwings have a strict medical use policy stating that, outside of medical use, drug use is frowned upon and highly punishable with a 3-6 month prison sentence if abused. Mudwings tend to produce as many of these drugs as they can seeing as they're not as harsh on the other tribes, these drugs are the most common on the market.

Nightwings- Vampire Bats, Hedgehogs, Solenodon, Shrew, and Slow Loris are the nightwing drugs of choice. All are Mammalia that frequent the kingdom and are sold on the black market, similar to the mudwings. The nightwings have similar medical uses as the mudwings but tend to be a little looser with their free-use laws, stating that nightwings should stay home so as to not disrupt the flow of the kingdom. The nightwings also tend to buy and sell drugs at higher prices than originally bought to broaden income.

[wildlifetracker]

Amazon milk frog, Trachycephalus recinifictrix

Native throughout northern South America, living in the canopies of the rainforest. They get their name from the milky white substance they secrete when threatened that can cause illness or death, similar to other species like poison dart frogs.

[just-a-living-meat-thing]

Amphibious Death Note au!!!!!

Tbh I didn’t put much thought or effort into the designs, it was more so just a spur of the moment doodle so idk what species of amphibians they all are (and I’m missing Rem too 😭)

L—some kind of poison dart (intelligence) or tree frog (secrecy and mysteriousness) , idk yet

Light—a common sort of gecko. I almost made him a snake but 1, that’d ruin the whole amphibious theme I had going on, and 2, it’s a bit on the nose to call him a snake in my opinion

Ryuk—originally gonna be a hognose snake bc of similar facial features, but then suddenly he had legs and wings?? So I guess he’s a dragon now?

Misa—also some breed of a common salamander or gecko species, but probably something really flashy, affectionate, and/or colorful

Matsuda—axolotl, just because. He seems like he’d get stressed easily

[solroskajan]

walks over. hello i'm going to infodump a bit BUT that manticore au post makes my braincells kick into full gear (and i adore your design for v in it so much, omfg) SO!

hooded pitohuis! via wikipedia:

"A medium-sized songbird with reddish-brown and black plumage, this species is one of the few known poisonous birds, containing a range of batrachotoxin compounds in its skin, feathers and other tissues."

batrachotoxin itself can be found in poison dart frogs, so you Know it's Bad™️ and it also has no antidote! it irreversibly opens sodium channels in nerve cells and stops them from closing, which paralyzes and leads to death. morbid stuff but very fascinating!

as for the venom in the quills? oh my god that is GENIUS. feather quills have hollow shafts, meaning there's also the potential to have them filled with toxin in case a feather breaks—that way if anyone breaks one in a fight they are getting a nasty (and incredibly painful) surprise, lol

i hope this unprompted ramble is alright-slash-permitted, i just woke up and am fueled by bird nerd knowledge to share some things that could be silly >:)

and as a bonus/goodbye i'd love to offer owl defensive posture

because they just look very silly to me

hope you have a great day/night/whatever :D i am always present if you need bird advice or info!!!

Hello!! Thank you for liking my silly design haha! I really gotta draw more for this AU sometime, I have some ideas for it and it's fun to draw. I got the idea for the quills because I wanted the dissasemblers to be able to stab people with their wings, you know, since the feathers are actual knives in canon. Besides, they're manticore inspired so it fits!

I don’t mind this message at all, in fact I really love birds myself and I remember reading about this poisonous one before! Birds are awesome, there's always a cool one out there you've never heard of before. My username actully have my favorite bird (and animal in general) In it, solroskajan means the sunflower jackdaw in swedish!

[askbishopschildren]

I'm bored, so yall get a bunch of fun facts

TW for the Loki section mentioning suicidal thoughts

Koda, Mars' and Apollo's dad for those who don't remember, originally was sent to Heket as an offering from his village. They had pretty poor harvests and not much was working, but eventually Heket came by to see what else they had to offer and took a liking to Koda pretty quick. Frankly he doesn't know why she chose him, nor does he think he deserves it, but he's grateful nonetheless

Artemis physically cannot go more than a week or two without getting sick, their immune system is THAT bad

Artemis is also allergic to cats despite loving them.

Mars prefers to stay solo, however if he fucks up and pisses off either Astraeus or another bishop, he will cower and hide behind his momma. He's a giant mommas boy if you couldn't tell

When with the lamb, Astaeus goes on missionary a lot since he can use his bigger form if a life or death situation arises

Continuing on the missionary theme, Mars tries to go as much as possible solely to get away from the lamb since he hates them, both for hurting his family but also supplying his drug dealer with enough shrooms that he died

Speaking of that, Sozo is just straight up Mars' drug dealer. They talk a lot over mushroomos and regular shrooms alike. It's also how he ended up getting along with Iluquim as Sozo kept insisting they talk

Artemis is a damn good cook, as they spend free time especially when sick doing it just to kill time. They really enjoy the cooking.

Mars really does not respect his dad much, but in the end he still does love him. He just thinks he is really weak compared to other cultists, which he isn't entirely wrong about and Koda thinks he is correct aswell.

Apollo experiments with poisons a lot, including his own as a poison dart frog. His mother gives him heretics to test the poisons on, however he usually lets the heretics that praise Narinder go under the guise of escaping.

Apollo is also just very shy when it comes to Aym, and Aym is too dense to notice the crush. Baal is driven insane every time he sees it.

Mars and Apollo both used to cuddle in their mothers bandages/scarf when they were little, with Mars even throwing fits when Heket wouldn't let him do it when she needed to do something.

Gaia is the only one of the cousins, aside from Loki, to not be able to change to a smaller form to match followers just because shes already pretty small to begin with, considering regular followers go up to her shoulders.

Mars is physically the strongest of the cousins, but it's from overcompensating as he doesn't have any special abilities like the bishops or his cousins. Apollo doesn't have much either, but he doesn't feel the need to overcompensate like his younger brother

As for their abilities, Astraeus can use weapons/abilities of different zodiac signs ones at a time, Gaia can grow plants anywhere she wishes, Loki is basically a nerfed Discord from MLP, Artemis can manipulate shadows and make animals out of them, and Apollo can light bend but it isn't much.

Artemis is AFAB

Astraeus is the cousin who's the farthest from their bishop parent by a mile, excluding Loki obviously since he ditched them decades ago, just due to Shamura being so busy in general.

AAnd for a final bit, a section fully to a Loki infodump

So we all know Leshy was a total hardass on Loki when he was a kid, but it was BAD. Loki was pretty much dead inside when Ratau found him, to the point Loki pointed Rataus sword to himself just because he had no reason to stay alive anymore. Ratau recruited him by showing him knucklebones and getting him hooked, which is why he is such a big gambler now. It's so bad that he lost both his eye and his leg in two bets, both to Shrumy, as Ratau forgot to teach him safer gambling practices and he didn't learn his lesson the first time. Loki also liked to sing for Rataus cult back in the day, and to an extent still enjoys doing it when Lambert starts their cult. He genuinely loves his counsins when he meets them and likes to help them with any issues they might have, basically acting more like an uncle to them over a cousin.

There might be another part of this if I get bored again, as I have accumulated a lot of facts and infodumps over the months of these guys being around from talkin bout em with friends on discord :]

[depraced]

hello all you lovely people and autonomous entities! I've noticed a fair bit of people don't know how freaky frogs, just as a creature, are! I wanna give you some cool frog facts to help you either flesh out the character or at least amuse you.

Frogs have no throat muscles to swallow and must pull their eyes in to push food down! It is entirely possible that Fake Peppino has trouble eating food due to his bad eye.

Frogs are notably cannibalistic but SOME frogs can co-hab(cohabitate) like the dumpy frog!

Frogs can care for their kids! One of my favorite frog parents are poison dart frogs that let their children suction cup on their backs to be carried down the trees they live on. Bullfrogs are notably stupid and cannibalistic BUT there is a chance one stays behind to save all of their children from drying out! (This is called a creche)

Frogs can have hair! BUT and this is a big one, that hair is really just tiny strips of skin filled with blood vessels. It is likely if you cut Fake Peppino's hair he would bleed.. Or whatever he does when injured. It's the wolverine frog, btw.

Frogs have been known to use sign language! Strange, but there is a type of frog that lives near a waterfall that is so loud the only way to communicate is by waving their legs to convey thoughts.

There are frogs that get so small that they become really bad at everything. They are so small they cannot jump right because their inner ear cannot use fluid in the way it is supposed to. THEY CANNOT HEAR but the silly things still make noise anyways.

There is a type of frog that breaks its fingers to use the sharp bones as claws. Metal. Also the wolverine frog.

Frogs shed! They love the taste of their own shed skin like geckos.

If frogs are gymnasts toads are wrestlers. Armed with impressive arm muscles and back legs as well as MANY species packing a potent poison and even special claws, the only reason we don't fear them is that we do not fit in their mouths. I kept toads and if they wanted to kill something they crushed it to death. Also the toad I kept had an extra toe in front to help them grab the females and screamed if you grabbed behind their ears. It's a reflex to say they are a male so other males do not grab them. Bufo Americanis, btw.

Some frogs have that reflex too. They can scream if you grab their back or head.

A frogs tounge is attached at the front of the mouth and flips like a hinge! Fake Peppino does not seem to do that but really hinge tounges are cooler so his loss.

A tadpole absorbs its tail after it grows in its legs. It will not eat during this period. It's tail is all the food it needs. Also tadpole tails are cool. Yes, that is a fact.

There is a frog that can freeze solid making it one of the VERY few animals to be able to do so. It's heart barely beats during this time.

The glass frog is see-through. Seriously. Look it up, it's cool as hell. Not as completely as the glass eel but enough to watch it's innards.

poison dart frogs raised in captivity are entirely safe to handle as their poison comes from their food. Toads just make their own through glands. They are always bad to eat.

Let me know if I missed any cool facts! I forget how much people do or don't know.

[jadafitch]

Dangerous Stuff, now available on fabric and wallpaper, in three different color combos. Design features some of the most deadly plants and animals on the planet.

Spoonflower Shop

geographic cone snail, poison fire coral fungi, golden dart frog, voodoo lily, castor bean plant, deathstalker scorpion, deadly nightshade, Brazilian wandering spider, lily of the valley, oleander, redback spider, banded krait, autumn skullcap, diamondback rattlesnake, death cap, angel’s trumpets, stonefish, poison hemlock, box jelly, blue-ringed octopus.

[trainingdummyrabbit]

Slips two more into your inbox. Paradise lost and pleasure Angie

YEAAAAAA ENABLING !!!!!!! \o/ iwouldve answered both in this ask but uhhhhhhhh paradiselost got Fucking Long so might as well just do them separately so i dont kill people to death. waha. anyhow,

THE BEAST !!! THE BEAST THE BEAST!!!!!! i dont know what it was that made me love her so much all of the sudden but she is literally one of my very top favorites now so uh well. :] !

Design- CREATURE!!!!!!!! this is a weird fucking horse. my beloved little velociraptor. that is both a bird of paradise and a poison dart frog. you understand. i dont know Why they decided to give her digitigrade legs but thank fucking god. little beastie. i just wish they really committed to the bit with it, she is So off balance with that stance + tail posture, please for th love of god just let her raptorhands ok. ok. i have to do everything my goddamn self around here. literally obsessed with the flashes of red in her scruffy hair though, reminds me of a slushy :] and her expressions!!!! you can barely see them but she is so silly yuor honor. and obviously, the most important bit,

fucking superb.

Theme- i have, once again, [spoken at length about her before,] thinly veiled (and starting as) as a general porccubus ramble. i dont think i could say anything here that i did not there, but god. man. i cannot express enough: she can do whatever she wants forever. she is getting such a good grade in coping mechanism guys dont worry

in conclusion: literally one of the best angelas i am NOT taking complaints at this time and i am NOT forgiving yall for almost letting her completely whiff the tourney with NO CHEERS yall BETTER CHEER FOR HER I SWEAR TO G

[marshmurmurs]

Armor and overall abe design by @ingapotejtoo except I ended up drawing them a little to the left. I was just gonna use his design as it is so I wouldn’t have to come up with one just for this silly little thing but then I had the thought that itd be funny if mans was getting ratatouilled by a frog which led to looking at frogs and the I saw the red-backed poison dart frog had a similar color palette and so

Context for this is based on a little headcanon about vaults the gods and the abyss. Just gonna paste the message I sent some of the vault friendos about this here:

Pete made a joke the other day about how dying in a vault gets your memories wiped and now I am Spinning. Thinking bout how the Abyss is outside the protection of the vault gods, about the implication that there's Something they protect the hunters from. Thinking bout memory loss on death being one of these things. Mayhaps the memories are tied to the ghosts. The gods recover ghosts from a vault before it falls to the Abyss and weave the memories of the vault back to the hunter. In those times between a hunter's death and the vault's destruction, the hunter can remember bits and pieces of what happened, but it's very distant and foggy. That connection between the hunter and their ghost is what makes the Abyss far more dangerous. The Abyss will eat at the ghosts, taking the memories of that vault. The deeper the death, the further from the gods’ reach the ghost is, the longer they are trapped there, the worse it is. There's a chance even that it eats at the hunter’s memory outside of just what happened in the vault. Sparkle off, its thursday, forget who you are. The vault gods think their hunters are hubristic and greedy fools for inviting the Abyss into the vaults but that’s not gonna stop them from damage control and trying to get the ghosts back as soon as they can.