#dear god this got away from me

[stoportotouch]

PLEASE tell me about the lieutenantcules kids

ohoho i would Love to

they end up having two, james frederick (little and hodgson) and katherine "kate" alexandria (irving and hodgson). (obviously hodge is transmasc here.) james is born in january 1849 and kate is born in july 1850. They Were Busy, is what i'm suggesting here. (behold my lovely spreadsheet, because i can't keep track of these people otherwise.)

since this is The One Where Doctor MacDonald Survives, he is also the one to deliver both of them. (which is great because hodgson doesn't fancy explaining all that whatnot to a new doctor.) this later becomes a great advantage in that it prevents hodgson from Fucking Dying having kate.

lots of Stuff below the cut, because i have a lot to say about these childen as it turns out.

james is named after fitzjames and fairholme (and also edward's older brother james cornelius) and also after fred hornby. after he's born, hodgson (slightly high on Fun Victorian Narcotics, as was the fashion at the time) suggests calling him "james james". this is not necessarily unfitting considering that he is named after the man so james that they called him it twice but get Vetoed.

james is one of those "started talking late but once he started he never stopped again" neurodivergent kids, and his Personality is basically the same as hodgson's. (this includes The Neurodivergence. he would be diagnosed with autism and adhd if this was the 21st century.) this eventually leads him to join the diplomatic corps, for some reason.

he is basically hodgson's software on little's hardware in that he looks and physically acts basically exactly like little but with some of hodgson's pointy features. he... is short. (just barely taller than little when he's full grown.) partly because, as you can see, april of 1848 isn't that long after they were rescued.

but also little is short and in a short family, and hodgson is alone in his immediate family in being tall. (or rather, he was objectively tall pre-transition. he got bumped down to Just Below Average Height by the simple expedient of cutting his hair.)

james was also The World's Most Difficult Baby, again because he was born to somebody who was still kind of recovering from scurvy and definitely recovering from lead poisoning. this is literally just because the "thank god we're alive" came back LONG before the... actual intelligence did. (it also fucked hodgson's hip up for the rest of his life.)

for the first year or so james does Not like not being held, wakes up at just about every noise or External Stimulus and has colic. then around his first birthday he suddenly just goes like "hm, no more of that, thanks" and starts walking. which completely fixes all the other problems. (he still doesn't start talking until quite a while after kate.)

the not talking does give his Dads pause until james cornelius mentions when he visits that edward didn't talk until he was about seven. thus when james starts talking when he's about five or six this seems to explain everything. (one difference: when edward started talking he seemed to do so unwillingly and never talked much. james starts and then never stops for the rest of his life. this is presumably hodgson's genetics kicking in.)

as i mentioned earlier. katherine (or kate) is hodgson and irving's kid, which is just... a fascinating combination of personalities to cross-pollinate. she's named after katherine irving, who is irving's sister-in-law (and also one of his best friends), and also after alexander macdonald.

katherine irving is an obvious person to name her after, especially since irving is a bit glum about not being able to tell his family about Having Kids, on account of The Circumstances. but naming his kid after her is the next best thing (especially when he had always promised her Godmother Rights if he had kids). alexandria is, obviously, after doctor macdonald. it seems like the least they can do since he stops hodgson from dying. (kate is completely fine.)

kate is like. the world's most chill baby, and also the pregnancy is far physically/psychologically easier on hodgson than james was. most of the issue the first time was the combination of "the unknown" and like. Gender Stuff. the latter of these still gets to him from time to time with kate but far more mildly and he feels more able to talk about it. (because he was pregnant with james while little was recovering from a brain injury and irving was recovering from being stabbed. as i said, they were not especially bright in this regard.)

as i said earlier, having james when he was still recovering fucks up hodgson's hip for the rest of his life. this actually doesn't lead to what happens with kate but it probably doesn't help. (kate is also a far larger baby, since irving is tall and quite broad when he isn't malnourished, and from quite a tall family.) long story short doctor macdonald figures out that hodgson isn't just sore/tired and a bit high and hodgson gets an emergency hysterectomy out of it.

hodgson later suggests, once everybody has recovered from the shock of "partner/other father of our kids/friend just nearly bled to death", that they call her stephanie. you know, because of doctor stanley (who in fairness he did get on really well with. world's oddest friendship, or not really considering that when we see doctor stanley make attempts at Bedside Manner it's basically hodgson through a filter of irony poisoning).

little and irving haven't even talked about it and irving is kind of... avoiding it all (he does with both births but hodgson only particularly wants little with him. not for any particularly Personal reason irving's energy is just too jumpy for a sick-room). hodgson does suggest that he be there when kate is born because he knows what to expect now and they're All a bit further out from The Initial Arctic Trauma. irving says no, which turns out to be the right decision because he spends about a week having a panic attack.

they decide on a full name for her very quickly. (both of them have hodgson's surname, just to avoid any questions. this doesn't actually avoid questions with james because he looks like little.)

kate looks basically exactly like hodgson did as a kid, which is really weird for him (and also makes him a bit more protective of her than he was expecting to be). it's doubly weird that she also acts exactly like he did. as an adult she ends up looking like hodgson but a girl/with irving's tone of voice and way of speaking. (she's also about six foot tall fully grown.) basically she looks like this leyendecker painting.

she basically acts like hodgson would if he didn't have... The Problems. which can be extremely annoying but also it's great for her; she's assertive in a way that neither of her Dads could ever manage in addition to being at least book-intelligent. (she isn't people-intelligent.) she fortunately doesn't pick up irving's anxiety (or his compulsions) but she does get his Maths Brain.

she and hodgson still bond over music but she's very into like. Finding The Right Answer so he gets her into bach. this works excellently. she eventually ends up with his ancient copy of gradus ad parnassum that he's scribbled in over the course of a few decades. she is far better at bach chorale harmonisations than he is. (or rather, she picks it up far quicker.)

-----

on the subject of their families: some of little's family know but this is limited to james cornelius (Gay Uncle, beloved by both james and kate for all their lives), and little's sister margaret anne (and her husband, john). margaret and john don't particularly get it but also "aw, nieces and nephews" (and margaret likes hodgson). they look after james when kate is born.

hodgson... basically does not talk at all to his family, honestly. his dad died in 1844 (literally right before he met irving. like he was going through all that while they were having a really complicated Situationship that ended with irving trying to ghost him but not being emotionally able to) and while he used to get on with his mother... not so much any more.

if he hadn't had kids then he would probably have gritted his teeth with at least two of his siblings (beilby porteus and mary) and at least tried to have more of a relationship with them. but then as soon as he has james he's just like, "yeah my family are never getting near our kids", and kate being born (and everything around that) cements that in his mind.

he uh. i have so much to say about his relationship with his oldest sister, henrietta mildred. but the summary as it pertains to this is "he is still stuck at the level of a very scared seven-year-old where she is concerned and she is stuck at the level of a very miserable nineteen-year-old where he is concerned." they could probably talk it out. it would actually be beneficial. but they literally never will.

-----

further on Family Dynamics (and also a bit about Victorian Class Dynamics):

hodgson is a good amount younger than his siblings (or than his surviving siblings). he's one of five that survived to adulthood and he's ten years younger than the next one up which means that he was basically an only child but that his parents had forgotten everything about babies and toddlers. so like, Victorian Ideas About The Child, Multiplied By Ten Thousand.

he was also completely unexpected and while not quite unwanted he was far more handed off to nurse and then nanny than his older siblings as a kid. and then he went away to a boarding school aged thirteen, joined the navy at the age of fifteen, and basically never came back again. (until post-franklin-expedition.)

so he thinks that little, whose family mostly still live together and see each other as often as they can, has a really weird relationship with his parents and siblings. little is not going to argue this because he's sure he'll find something awful if he scratches the surface. also hodgson isn't going to press the issue because uh. little came home to discover that his mother had died a couple of months before they were rescued. so he doesn't want to cause any further Hurt.

little does, though, feel really weird about handing the kids off to nannies and nurses and governesses. (he's one of twelve from a family which was upwardly mobile but still working-ish class. they could not afford all that whatnot.) he still ends up getting on very well with the nurse they find, who they keep employing after james is born. this turns out to be a good thing when kate is born, because of The Circumstances.

[weaverofink]

teddy my most beloved!!!<3 (wip)

[lesbianshadowheart]

the lack of fandom insanity about aloy hzd is crazy to me.....she was literally born of immaculate conception to be the saviour of a world that doesnt want her. she was the loneliest girl in the world the first and last of her kind. while gay

[deepseawave]

obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog

Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️

Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D

[katyspersonal]

I never caught up with the Undertale AUs much (was overwhelmed with the hype and by the time I played the game myself I developed "keep to self and 5 close mutuals" mentality on fandomry already) but one thing I found the most interesting is how fandom developed that meta commentary thing with Error!Sans and Ink!Sans stuff. Iirc at least one of these got changed into an OC detached from the fandom but you can still find traces of the past online, but basically the versions of Sanses represented THE two extremes of fandomry nobody would want to fall into!

Ink represented the most uncritical, the most insufferable creative indulgence possible with no pressure to ground it into what makes the original itself to begin with. The guy that won't distinguish between a fanwork (AU most particularly) that knowingly takes a few creative liberties and a "fanwork" that is literally just someone completely remaking story and personalities of the characters into what they prefer more. A guy that would never say "Just make an OC already!" and will fight anyone who tells you this, a guy with 0 standards for fanworks. Basically missing the point of the fandom: to be fans of the original! He is also an emotional junkie and engaging with AUs is his most effective way to feel any pleasure, so he is also a meta of creatively bankrupt fans who permanently demand to "consume content" regardless of what it is xD

Error, on the other hand, is an absolute prick that sees canon divergence in any way shape or form as something inherently bad (an "abomination" that should not exist in his own context). Like, you know the guy that thinks redesigns, ships that aren't canon, AUs and such are "disrespectful to the author"? Error is this kind of guy. Not even just a cringe culture guy, a guy that simply hates fun and creativity, and God forbid fans actually DO something interesting with the source material instead of.. what, literally Just Staring at it for eternity? (Also the funniest fucking character because he himself is a diversion from canon lol In fact, diversion of ANOTHER diversion!)

Like, yeah the meta is not all there is for the characters, they both have their own origins and story within the setting (iirc it was actually the focus, and how it became a meta was coincidental). But they literally were defender or all AUs and destroyer of all AUs respectively, I thought it was super fun how Undertale fandom came up with the way to give faces to the two extremes fans of anything should not fall into. It was smart, I guess?

And it is not like fandoms (all of them) changed in this regard, most people still agree that "you should not feel pressured to stay 100% accurate to canon and I beg you people to revisit the source material at least sometimes are two statements that can and should coexist". In terms of my current fandom: Ink would fully encourage evil perverted manipulative griffith Miquella portrayal because "yay all creative valid :)" and Error would harass you for drawing Godwyn consort instead of canonical Radahn consort fsdhfdshsh And any true fan will disapprove of both of these, right?

P.S.: Just realised that I am talking about this like an old man who reminiscences on the trends of his youth when UTDR fandom is still interested in the popular AUs including these ones, so I am just here like:

[meatmensch]

Jamie: I'm gonna buy the whole team PS5s. They'll fucking love me. Ted: Yeah, but, you know, some folks might also consider that buying affection. Jamie: Exactly. Yeah, what better thing to spend money on than love?

This exchange from S2E03 is really depressing. This is a learned behavior. His dad is scum of the Earth. We know from S3E06 that, when Jamie was in his teens, his dad was trying to act like a super-dad, and buying him stuff, like trips to Amsterdam, and tickets to matches, and sex. He thinks money equals love dawggg 😭

[asfdhgsdkjhgb]

hi tumblr dot com im freaking out rn i forgot how fun it is to have a stupid silly little crush

[jikigo]

you ever just see a post and just

. 😭

.⬅️🫀⬅️

[arolesbianism]

Yet another beautiful day to have the Maxwel tag blocked (can't see half of the posts in the Wendy tags)

[badgirlcoven-official]

This is absolutely not a diss on anyone who did like the Collector's ending there's merits to it and interpretations that make it more reasonable but sometimes idk it's such a let down when you're watching a show about found family, acceptance, healing from abuse, etc and you get attached to this character only to never see them get more than a gentle dismissal.

I have to wonder what kids who are more like the Collector than the other kids in the show or who have similar behaviors because of neglect feel about that ending. Maybe for some of them the idea of leaving everyone behind to be in their own space would be freeing and exciting but it does come with the implication that the Collector didn't deserve to have a real family.

That's what stings about it I think, I know that wasn't the intention but his resolution really kinda was like "ok now take this and go away" in the end he was too out of touch, too powerful, too weird, too messed up, and no one especially wanted him enough for the writers to justify him staying.

[problemcore]

i miss this game already

[calyptramoths]

I FINISHED THE DREAM THIEVES. HOLY SHIT. SPOILERS IN TAGS.

[vettely]

.

[touchmycoat]

my tummy still hurts from laughing, ending with the oh sh*t moment of whoops. that was a gift from WHO?!

HAHAHAHAHAHA GOD BLESS

[autumnrory]

godddd i will just never get the appeal of bucky/sam to me it is the equivalent of putting like. jim and dwight in a romantic relationship which I’m sure a lot of people do but STILL at least there’s more substance there

[bagofshinyrocks]

Government name vs Military callsign

Prompt: What scares them worse? Addressing them by their full government name, or addressing them by their military callsign?

Featuring: Task Force 141 (CoD: MW2) - John Price, Simon "Ghost" Riley, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Johnny "Soap" MacTavish (separately) x GN!Reader

Word Count: 0.9k

Warnings: none

John Price

Government name.

Calling him Captain or Skipper just ends with him sauntering to where ever you are and ask (in an obnoxiously self-satisfied voice) what you wanted. Like a cat pretending it can’t hear the urgency in your tone when you say to get off the counter.

“If you want me to ‘shake a leg’, call my name, luvie.”

Now if you holler “Jonathan Price”, he’ll drop something. Either the newspaper in his hands, or his heart into his stomach. He sure as hell moves his ass with a purpose, and he’s peering into the room with an apology on his lips.

“Yes, luv? What’s wrong, poppet?”

“Lift the other end of the couch, would you?”

He does, and you shimmy it further back in the room. “Anything else I can do, love o’ my life?” He’s hovering, and gently coaxing you into his arms. Gauging how mad you were at him. You curled into him and kissed his chin. Then stepped away with a pat to his chest.

“No, sweetheart, just wanted you to shake a leg is all.”

When he remembers your previous conversation, he groans and tells you to fuck off.

Simon Riley

Military callsign.

When you two are alone, and he’s already given you permission to call him Simon, don’t call him Ghost. When you say that word, he assumes one of his mates are at the door or on the phone, and goes from Simon to Ghost. Stalks into the room with narrowed eyes, only to find you in the kitchen. By yourself.

“Ghost, you want a sandwich too? Turkey and cheese.”

“Fuck you callin’ me that for?” 

Once he sees you’re alone, he swoops in and wraps around you like a hoodie. A firm kiss to your ear, then your cheek, then spun you around. Back pressed to the counter top. Settles his face right close to yours.

“We playin’ games now?” You didn’t want to upset him, so you pressed a kiss to his nose. His grumpy look faded a bit.

“Sorry, baby.” Arms wrapped carefully around his shoulders. And your fingers scratch his scalp. Another kiss to his nose. “I’m sorry for playing games with you. Simon Riley.”

Hearing his name on your lips finally cracked, and he gave you a smile. A little scar on the upper lip. You gave it a kiss, and then pressed a kiss to his lips. 

A quick surge forward, and you only just had time to shove aside the things behind you before you found yourself on the countertop.

Kyle Garrick

Government name.

He doesn’t mind being called Gaz, and you’ll use Kyle and Gaz interchangeably. Doesn’t even mind if you use “Kyle” or “honey” in front of his squadmates. Though “Kylie” he does have some displeasure with.

“I’ll have you know, Soap is still calling me Kylie, you asshole.”

Call him ‘Garrick’, and he knows that you are pretending to be mad at him. He slinks over and rubs his face against your cheek. He’s too cute for you to stay mad.

If you shout “Kyle Garrick”, he comes running. He could have sworn that he put his clothes in the hamper. And did the dishes. And taken out the recycling. Damn, what was it that he forgot?

“Kyle Ga-”

“Yes, dear!” Shit, he didn’t mean to ‘yes, dear’ you. “Yes, my dear, I’m right here.”

You pause your laundry folding and summon him with a crook of your finger. Once he’s close enough, you tap your lip with the same finger. “I need a kiss.”

He blinked once. Then twice. “God damn you.” He squishes your face in his hands and gave you a quick, firm kiss. “Don’t stress me out like that. Thought you were mad.”

“Give me another kiss, or I will be.”

He rapid fire kissed your mouth, chin, and cheeks, then gave you a smack on the ass before returning to the living room. 

“In my own fucking home,” he muttered.

John MacTavish

Military callsign.

He’s got some thick skin. And he’s had his name shouted angrily many a time. He would all but skip into the room with a big smile on his face. The only people who shouted that name (and wore out the scare-factor on it) were his family members. Shouting “John MacTavish” meant you loved him. You were also mad at him, but you loved him. That was more important. Even with your scowl and the gross pile of garbage he kept forgetting to take out. You loved him.

Now shouting his callsign reminded him of his superior officers.

“SOAP!”

Shit shit shit. He put down his beer and ran from the garage to the backyard. Leg brace over his sweats, low cut muscle shirt that you also wolf-whistle at when he wears. You were only weeding the garden boxes.

“JOHNNY!”

“I’m here, bonnie,” he hollered, rounding the corner. You were sitting in the dirt, a tidy pile of weeds and dead plant bits next to you.

“C’mere, c’mere.”

He leaned down next to you, hand on your shoulder and good knee on the ground. “Wassit?”

You pointed to the leaf in your hand. “A caterpillar, Johnny. An itsy-bitsy caterpillar.”

He sighed heavily and kissed your shoulder. “Bonnie, I thought something was wrong.”

“Hm?” You spared him a glance. “What are you talking about, bubba?”

“You called me Soap.”

“Did I? Didn’t mean to spook you, loverboy.” You gave him an apologetic kiss on the lips. “Just wanted you to see the caterpillar before he wiggled off.”

Posted: 2023 Dec 10