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brain-rot-central · 11 months ago

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Sonnet of the Lone Cardinal

A/N: This is a working title. I reserve the right to change it going forward, lol. This is also my first AA fic! Can't believe it took me this long. Also feel free to note any other tags I may have missed. I'll add them as I go.

Rating: E Word count: 5.1k Pairing: Ascended Astarion/Fem!Tav Warnings: 18+, post-canon, PiV sex, creampie, angst, stalking behavior, obsessiveness, possessiveness, manipulative behavior (overall A's not really the greatest in this), use of derogatory language (though not at anyone specifically), messy break-up, depictions of gore, break-up (maybe make-up?) sex

Summary: Astarion has performed the Rite, becoming someone unrecognizable. Tav leaves him after settling their business with the Netherbrain, refusing his proposition to become his consort. She uses these last 6 months to heal her broken heart, mourning all they were and what they could have been. Hopefully all her hard work has paid off, because he's decided he wants her back and drops in for a visit.

♥ Next Chapter ♥ Link to Ao3

“It's awfully dangerous for such delectable morsels to leave their windows open this time of night.”

The whimsical voice comes from behind. With it, a rush of cold air sweeps through the quaint upstairs bedroom. Curtains lining the double panes of the front windows dance as the breeze blows in. Papers on the dresser scatter about the floor.

A young woman dressed in a sheer linen nightgown sits at her vanity, combing through her long red hair, when she freezes.

A familiar scent dances beneath her olfactory nerves - heady, rich, citrus. She breathes deeply, the warm spice of the cologne sweeping through her. Waves of heat pulse throughout her body as her ears pick up the sound of footsteps drawing closer.

With a sigh, the woman closes her eyes as the assailant reaches her position, their footsteps coming to a halt behind her.

It's him, she realizes. She’s never been more sure of anything else in her life.

Many months have passed since their last meeting. Passion burned as hot as an Infernal forge on that night. Promises of love, of pleasure, of power poured freely from their lips as their bodies intertwined. At that moment, she was prepared to give him everything - her life, her freedom, her body, soul.

She would have, had she not come to realize it was all an elaborate farce.

As she cracks open her eyes, daring to look up, the woman catches his reflection in the vanity mirror. With an audible gasp, it quickly dawns on her that this is the first time she’s seeing his face reflected in a glass pane.

Their eyes meet in the mirror, her chest suddenly heaving.

It is him.

And by the Gods, he's even more devastatingly handsome than she remembers.

“You never know what sort of monsters are out lurking the streets, hm?” he purrs, bringing his face close to her ear.

Assaulted once more by the warm spice of his cologne, her head spins.

“Astarion,” the woman whispers, nearly breathless. “What are you doing here?”

Craning his head, Astarion dips down into the nape of her neck, inhaling deeply. Her pulse quickens as he draws near, heart hammering away in her ribcage. His lips curl, fangs gleaming in the faint candlelight illuminating the room as his tongue sweeps over his teeth.

“I needn't an invitation to go where I please now, pet,” he pants against her neck.

A cold shudder shoots down her spine.

There was a time when her body would come alight from his many terms of endearment.

Darling, dear, sweet, pet, love.

Love.

“Nothing special, of course. You're only the first person I truly care for.”

His words echo in the far recesses of her mind. The words of her companion and partner, her lover… of a man who no longer exists.

That night in the ritual chamber, he changed.

The sound of the staff hitting the stone floor reverberates off ancient walls. Cazador and his spawn playing their parts, bound together in blood by the Rite. Astarion, levitating at the center, eyes burning red as an aura of blood envelops him. He's chanting the words - the Infernal seance that was once meant to be his end.

Her tongue lay heavy in her mouth. Words fly across her mind; desperate pleas begging him to reconsider, to stop this. None ever make it past her lips.

Suddenly, the spawn pop. One after the other.

Pop, pop, pop.

Astarion laughs, loud and boisterous, relishing the new found power that comes with each death.

Finally comes Cazador's turn.

He screams - a true blood-curdling scream. The type you hear moments before a person knows death has come, all too late. His voice carries on as she stands in the chamber, helplessly watching Cazador succumb to the ritual. He bursts at the seams into a pile of pulverized matter, dripping onto the floor below, completely unrecognizable.

Then suddenly, the room is engulfed by a haunting silence.

The Ascension… is complete.

The aura around Astarion fades and he drops down onto the platform below his feet. He remains kneeling for a moment. The sound of his breathing is all that fills the chamber, companions too stunned to speak.

He rises, slowly turning to face their leader. Looking upon his face, she sees the horrible truth lay bare before her.

Her lover is no more.

She's mourned him, the promise of them, ever since that night. Cried tears until her head throbbed and her face swelled, cried until nothing but sleep could soothe the ache in her heart.

And here he stands behind her, a scowl littering his visage as their eyes meet yet again in the mirror.

Her heart pounds in her throat, tears welling at the corners of her eyes. She swallows, asking, “Why did you come here, Astarion?”

Astarion pulls himself back, taking a few paces away from the woman. Folding his arms over his chest, he replies, “My darling Tav, I've come to take you home.”

“Home? I am home,” insists Tav. Turning her body, still seated in her chair, she scans him over.

Moonlit curls sweep elegantly across his forehead, framing his face. Ruby gems glint in the dim light of the room. He's wearing a black and silver doublet, blood-red dragons delicately embroidered on the lapel. Every bit elegant and refined; elite.

Astarion's face softens. He draws closer again, Tav’s breath hitching as his hand cups her chin. Tilting her face up toward his, he states, “I've given you more than enough freedom.” He cranes his head, bringing his lips a breath above her own as he whispers, “Don't you think?”

The velvet grace of his voice makes her dizzy. Tav realizes she feels heat radiating off his skin as their faces draw closer in proximity; a stark contrast to his usual aura. Her face burns - a fire that quickly spreads down into her belly. Tav tries to speak but Astarion closes the distance, lips capturing hers in a delicate embrace. His kiss is soft, alluring, unhurried.

Gentle, she thinks to herself. He's being so gentle.

“Astarion-” she protests, logic returning to her as she breaks the kiss. Tav scans his face, drawing her head back. Heavy lids fall over his eyes as they transfix upon her lips. He’s hungry, in more ways than one.

She knows that look. It's the very same he'd give her night after night in his tent, when all he wished was to share his body with her. Instead, they'd find other ways to partake in the ecstacy of one another until they were left breathless and panting.

But that was long ago.

Astarion's tongue darts out to lick over his lips as he says, “A lord is nothing without his dearest consort.” He moves to kiss her again, but Tav quickly ducks out of reach. She stands, hands clenched in tight fists.

“No,” she insists, locking eyes with him. She furrows her brow. “I will not be made into your personal plaything!”

A chuckle rumbles from his chest. Astarion tilts his head, a smirk forming on his face. “‘Plaything?’” he reiterates. “Do you believe I think that little of you?” Astarion brushes his knuckles over Tav’s cheek. “My darling treasure,” he begins, “I have many playthings, though none are quite like you.”

Tav’s pupils blow wide.

Astarion means to make her jealous with talk of other lovers. He means to fill her mind with images of him making love to unknown beings. To make her think of him finding pleasure in others who are not her.

She will not rise to it.

“Your chosen harlots aren’t enough?” Tav sneers. “I thought Lord Astarion Ancunín had everything he desired?”

With a scoff, Astarion replies, “You don't get it, do you?” A twinge of impatience can be heard as he says, “You helped make me what I am. We are bound to one another, until the end of time.”

Tav shudders as his hands come up to hold her face. She pulls in a sharp breath, expecting the cold sting of death from his usual chilled palms. Yet, they're completely warm as they cradle her jaw. Another reminder that he is now very much changed. Alive. His cologne assaults her senses once more and her eyes flutter closed as she settles into the strange comfort of his touch.

“My heart will never stop calling for you,” Astarion speaks softly. “No other can satisfy that hunger.” He brushes over her bottom lip with the pad of a thumb and feels her tremble below him. “You are to be my consort, my bride,” he insists, voice stern but low. “That is your role in this.”

Tav falters beneath his touch, allowing herself to be walked back to the wall next to the vanity. Her hands come up to wrap around his wrists. “Such honeyed words,” she retorts. “If I didn't know any better, I'd actually believe you.” Her back connects with the wall and she gasps.

“Tav, look at me,” Astarion demands with urgency. She doesn't comply, turning her head to the side. Slipping a hand from her cheek to grasp her chin, he forcibly turns her head back toward his. “Look at me!” he spits again.

Hesitant to look upon Astarion’s face, Tav cracks her eyes open. Opening them fully, it's not anger that she finds there. Her stomach flips. No, not anger or even disappointment. Instead, she sees… vulnerability.

“I wish I could replace you. I’ve tried,” Astarion bites out through clenched teeth. His face falls as his eyes settle on her. “Nothing can fill the void your absence has left.” He shakes his head slightly before adding, “Something within me screams for you, as if I were alone in a decrepit crypt and only you can save me.”

Her heart beats wildly in her chest. She feels as though she may suffocate, or that her heart may give out at a moment's notice. Tav begins to feel the tendrils of desire dance across her abdomen. They start low in her groin and quickly spread upward, causing a rhythmic contraction of her walls. She cannot fall for this again, she simply must not. All he's done is spout pretty words and step into her presence. And yet…

His breath pants against her face as he rests their foreheads together. The scent of freshly chewed mint whirls beneath her nose. Her vision spins.

In her stupor, Tav hardly notices Astarion's hands slipping under her nightgown. His palms rest on the backs of her thighs and he lifts a leg, allowing more room to slot himself against her core.

Tav groans as their centers meet, arching her back. Her chest presses into his and she moans, hands seeking purchase in his hair as he rocks himself into her once again.

“Astarion,” she pleads, wrapping her leg around the small of his back. A bolt of pleasure shoots up from her groin. She feels her walls clench again in desperation as his hardened cock brush against her cunt, straining against the fabric of his trousers. Her body remembers him and is all too eager to receive him once more.

Astarion knows. He recalls exactly how her body reacts almost on instinct to his touch. He pants against her lips with each roll of his hips into hers. “Come home with me, Tav,” he groans out. “Please, darling. I need you.”

His voice comes out ragged, stressed. Astarion leans against her chest, slipping his face into the nape of her neck. Inhaling deeply, a fire begins smoldering low in his belly. Her scent is of fresh mountain dew in early spring. Floral, sweet, and holding the promise of possibility. His cock twitches in anticipation.

Tav moans, loud and unfiltered. Her knees grow weak and she nearly buckles off the wall if Astarion weren't holding her up. She throws her head against the wall behind her, back arching once again.

“I mourned you,” Tav tells him, nearly breathless. “I mourned us.” She doesn't protest as Astarion lifts her other leg to join in locking around his waist. Tav doesn't fight how he grinds himself into her again, trapping her between himself and the wall. She feels faint, her vision growing fuzzy at the edges, though she manages to huff out, “You don't get to come here and make demands of me, Astarion.”

Astarion pulls his head back leisurely to meet her eyes. “You left me, remember?” he says low in his throat.

“What choice did you leave me with?” Tav exclaims in frustration. “You wanted me to sacrifice my life in order to prove my love for you. You would have never asked that of me before that accursed Rite!”

“I only wish to live out the rest of eternity together,” Astarion replies. “I promised I would protect you, that no harm would ever come to you.”

Tav stares into his face as realization registers in her mind, mouth falling slightly agape. She's gotten used to reading between the lines of his words, so often laced with duplicate meaning. True to his former life as a rogue of the night.

Her mortality is a threat to his oath.

Astarion cannot fathom going through the rest of time without her. Or, he does, and the thought is too painful for him to ever risk becoming reality. That is what he means to say, though apparently incapable in this new state.

“Isn't this what you wanted?” he asks, quietly. “To be together? Forever?”

Tears well in the creases of her eyelids and Tav sobs. “You are a fool, Astarion Ancunín,” she chides.

Astarion hovers his mouth mere millimeters above hers. “Only for you,” he says. “Always for you.” He captures her lips in a gentle embrace, breathing deeply through his nose as he pushes further into the kiss.

Tav moans into his mouth as she slackens her jaw, creating enough room for their tongues to begin exploring one another. She gasps as Astarion carries her from the wall to her bed on the far side of the room, grabbing at his shoulders for leverage.

“Tell me I may have you,” he asks, breaking the kiss as he lays her down over the mattress. He climbs over her, mouth descending upon her neck. He peppers chaste kisses along the underside of her jaw.

Tav writhes beneath him, whimpers escaping her throat as he licks and suckles on the delicate flesh of her throat. With resolve quickly waning, her hands find purchase again in silver locks as she finally says, “You may, but only for tonight.”

Astarion freezes above her. Hesitantly, he pulls himself back, looking her over as he begins shrugging off his doublet. “Are you sure?” he inquires softly.

This is the perfect opportunity to ask him to turn and leave. To not start this over again, to not return down a path in which she knows there is no favorable end. Though, Tav also cannot deny just how much she has missed him, as well.

“It's only sex, Astarion,” she tells him, sitting up to undo the ties of her nightgown. “That's all this will be.”

His hands come to rest atop hers, replacing her motions as he pulls gently at the laces of the gown. With the last tie undone her gown falls open, revealing her bare breasts to his heated gaze. Astarion sucks in a sharp breath as he meets her eyes.

“Only sex,” he ponders aloud as he furrows his brow. “But what if I want-”

“No,” Tav interjects, voice firm. “This is all I can give you. You either take this, or you have nothing.” Her breathing comes uneven as she stares back at him, chest heaving. Her nerves have come alight; she cannot fall in love with him again, but she can at least offer him this.

With a curt nod, Astarion replies, “As you wish.”

His expression is guarded as he fumbles with the laces of his trousers. He pulls his undershirt up and over his head, dropping it unceremoniously onto the floor behind the bed. Standing up, he peels off his boots, pants, and underclothes in one fell swoop. He returns to Tav on the bed as bare as the day he was born, following her eyes as they roam down the long plane of his torso. They come to rest between his thighs.

Astarion’s cock stands ready at attention, jumping in tandem with his heartbeat. Saliva pools thick on her tongue and she slips the nightgown down and off her arms. She's left naked before him, not having time to fully dress before his unexpected visit. Tav hears him groan as he looks her over.

A surprised gasp falls from her mouth as he cups her sex. She feels him drag two fingers through the arousal that has already gathered between her folds, and watches as he brings those same fingers to his mouth. A bolt of desire pulls behind her navel as she watches his slick-soaked fingers slip between his lips. He suckles around them, moaning his approval.

With a wet pop, Astarion pulls the two digits from his mouth and places them against her cunt again. They're saturated with his spittle, softly prodding at her entrance.

“A-ah!” Tav gasps as his fingers sink in. It's only two, but Gods how she's struggling to take them. They glide in and out, Astarion occasionally curling his fingers to pass along the spongy spot inside her that turns her vision white.

It's not long before he's pulling his fingers out and lining himself up along her entrance. Astarion spits into his hand, giving himself a few languid strokes. The weight of his cock slaps down heavily as he drags his length through her slickened folds once, twice, before he's finally slipping into her.

Screwing his eyes shut, Astarion lets out a guttural groan as he feels his tip pop through her tense entrance, her warmth enveloping him as he seats himself a bit further before halting. Her walls spasm wildly around his shaft; it takes every ounce of willpower he has not to sink the rest of himself down into her inviting wet heat.

Tav sighs as she finally adjusts, body relaxing around him. She hadn't necessarily forgotten that taking Astarion is no small feat, though she did forget how it feels to actually do so.

“You can move,” she tells him meekly.

He doesn't respond with words; a simple nod of his head is all Tav gets before he's leaning over her, hips slipping further and further toward the backs of her thighs. Wrapping his arms around her thighs, Astarion pulls her into him, pelvis meeting her backside. He growls, cock twitching as his tip brushes against her cervix.

Tav shudders under him as he pulls out, feeling the dragging of his length within her cunt, only for him to push back in with added force. Her body jerks upward from the power of his thrust. An audible string of whimpers falls freely from her lips as he does it again, and again, and again.

Astarion catches Tav’s hands as she tries reaching for him, pushing them back toward the bedsheets. Confused by his gesture, Tav tries again, only for Astarion to once more shove her hands off of him.

Stunned, Tav looks at his face. Sweat is beginning to gather along his brow, though he keeps perfect composure. There is no lust nor passion to his expression. He looks… removed. Distant. Aloof.

Just… having sex.

“Astarion?” Tav asks, concerned. “I can't touch you?”

He scoffs above her, grunting as he slams his hips again into hers. “Touch is a rather intimate thing,” he says, sarcasm saturating his tone. “Intimacy isn't welcome when you're just having sex.”

“Stop,” Tav demands, hands pressing against his stomach. Astarion immediately ceases his movements. “This is too cold, Astarion,” she says quietly. “This isn't us.”

Above her, Astarion sucks in a large breath. “It is when it's devoid of emotion,” he clarifies, patience wearing thin. “That's what you wanted, isn't it?” He tilts his head, craning his neck to look down upon her. “Just a quick romp?”

“I-”

Venom seeps from his pores as he quickly adds, “If you were ever curious as to how I treat my harlots, well, now you know. It's rather different from our last time, eh? I wonder why that is?” Astarion feigns an inquisitive glance, placing a finger to the side of his mouth as his lips form into a pout.

“Astarion, I-”

Tav tries desperately to interject, but is disrupted again by Astarion snapping his fingers. “Oh, I know! It's because I made love to you!” he sneers, lips curling over his fangs as he leans closer to her face. “You were never a conquest to me!” he growls. “Never one night it's best to forget.”

Astarion exhales, eyes falling closed in an effort to regain his composure. “If you insist on me treating you like a whore in a brothel, fine,” he says, “I'll do it. But know it's not done willingly.”

Tav remains silent, words failing her. Her body trembles as the full weight of his confession echoes throughout her mind. Pulling in ragged breaths, she questions, “Would you make love to me again? If I asked?”

Astarion huffs out a laugh, his expression softening. “I would raze an entire city for you,” he confirms. “You need only ask.”

A sense of despair enshrouds her as she stares into his ruby red eyes. He still loves her, Tav realizes. As much as, if not more than, the day she left him. Her head pounds; she needs to stop this from going forward. The voice in her head is begging her not to continue, to not risk reopening the wound she's spent the last six months delicately stitching back together.

Their last night together replays in her thoughts. She recalls the all-encompassing feeling of want that radiated off Astarion, that night. He carried her into a world of pleasure she never dreamed possible, all while singing praises deeply into her ear as he rocked in and out of her core. They joined as one, body and soul. Or so Tav thought, until the following morning.

Astarion looks at her now with that same compassion in eyes. He means what he says; he would destroy anyone and anything should she ask it of him. He's already destroyed himself, all in a vow to protect her.

Choking back a sob, she accepts final defeat in the battle her heart fought so desperately since he first came through her window. “Make love to me then, Astarion,” Tav tells him, pleadingly. “The way you used to.”

The flame of the single candle in the room dances in his eyes. The ghost of a smile tugs at the corners of his lips. “Oh, my sweet,” he purrs, “There's nothing I'd like more,” Astarion brushes her cheek with the back of a palm. His arousal has flagged, still situated within Tav’s warmth, though it stirs back to life as he captures her lips in a hungry kiss.

Tav groans as she feels Astarion's length swell within her walls, noises swallowed by his mouth over hers. When he grows stiff enough, Astarion gives shallow thrusts between her legs. It isn't long until he's back to full virility, rolling his hips into hers in a steady rhythm.

She cries out as he breaks the kiss, one last deep thrust before he's pulling out of her. Pushing her legs back, knees almost hitting her chest, Astarion slips back into place between her thighs. Tav’s knees are being held up by his shoulders as he bends forward, sliding his cock back into her slickened cunt with ease.

Astarion groans as his cock slides down, down, down until his tip nudges the end of her tunnel. Tav gasps as he settles himself impossibly deeper, hips giving a soft push that leaves her womb pulsing. She claws at Astarion’s back when he pulls his hips up slightly, only to crash into her again.

Astarion rests his forehead against Tav’s. He drops his hips repeatedly into her center, eyes locked with hers as he does. The air pushed from her lungs from each of his thrusts passes over his face and he greedily sucks it in. Her face is flushed shades of red and pink as blood rushes through her veins, singing her desire loudly in his ears.

Nails sink into the tender scars on his back and Astarion hisses. With half open eyelids, Tav struggles to keep his gaze, pleasure threatened to overwhelm her. But when she finally does, she sees it. There, in his eyes, is him. The man she fell in love with.

Astarion's eyes are soft, round, pleading. The eyes of the man she gave herself to repeatedly all those months ago.

Each night she spent being devoured by his mouth, pulling the very essence of her body into his, she felt it - the sanctity of her oath dangling in the balance. Should she have stuck to her teachings, Astarion would’ve been staked through the heart at first discovery of his true nature. And yet, night after night, she willingly succumbed to the lustful desires that only her blood could provide him.

She moans as he angles his hips sharply on the next downstroke, the head of his cock brushing deliciously up against her spot. The rhythmic fluttering of her tunnel over his shaft pulls a throaty groan from Astarion, who quickly buries his face into the nape of her neck as the sensation wracks through his body. His arms envelop her torso, using her as leverage to increase the pace of her thrusts.

Tav feels her arousal leaking down the cleft of her ass, carved out from her with each plunge of his cock into her cunt. The tip of him rams against her spot repeatedly and she shakes in his arms, pleasure coiling tightly in her belly with not much left to hold onto. “Astarion,” she pants against his ear, mindlessly mouthing at his lobe. “Gods, Astarion…”

He groans again against her neck, skin muffling most of it. The sounds of their joint arousal fill the room, and Astarion pulls his lips back in anticipation of his impending climax. The smoldering fire in his belly has erupted into hellfire, threatening to consume all and any in its path if not quelled soon.

Fangs press into the delicate skin of her neck and Tav shivers, hands flying into his hair and grasping, pulling. “Do not bite me, Astarion,” Tav says, panicked.

Humming his disapproval, Astarion reluctantly pulls his head away from her neck. He rests his forehead against hers again. “Where do you want me, Tavaria?” The question comes quietly, unguarded. Strained.

Tavaria.

The sound of her full name on his tongue sends pulses of desire through her belly. He's close, Tav realizes. Astarion pants against her face as his thrusts grow more uneven. Moving a hand to his jaw, Tav holds his cheek, rubbing his chin with her thumb. “However you want,” comes her reply.

Astarion shudders, a moan slipping past his lips, eyes rolling to the back of his skull momentarily. He blinks back into focus, chest heaving as his breathing becomes labored. He's barely lifting hips into Tav, instead giving short stuttering thrusts that have his tip kissing her cervical os.

“Tav, please,” he begs. “Tell me.”

Silver strands of hair stick to his sweat-soaked forehead. Brushing them out of the way with a hand, she plants a kiss between his brow. “Inside,” she coos. “It's okay.”

Carnal desire flares behind Astarion's eyes. He grunts, raw and guttural as he dips his head back into the crook of her neck. He feels his cock begin to swell, a telltale sign that his release is imminent.

Tav whimpers as Astarion rams over her pleasure point again and again, the fattened head of his cock dragging along her walls. It doesn't take much longer before she's screaming out her completion below him, nails digging into the skin of his marred back.

Astarion roars out his own climax above her, balls pulling up tightly as fangs sink into the pillow next to her. He floods her channel with his seed, tiny rolls of his hips pulling groans from his chest as he rides out the wave. Tav’s walls are more than willing to massage the rest of his spend from his balls and into her greedy womb.

They lay together panting, post-coital haze in full effect. It isn't until Astarion shifts to pull out his softening member that Tav feels it - his spend dribbling from her entrance and onto the nightgown under her. He's the first to leave the bed, shaking his head while running a hand through tousled locks. Tav watches him disappear into her washroom as she slowly sits herself up onto her elbows.

The sound of water running into the tub can be heard and Astarion reappears in the doorway. He returns to the bed, Tav gasping as he scoops her up into his arms and carries her toward the washroom.

“What are you doing, Astarion?” she asks, mind still clouded by her peak. She loops her hands around his neck, lolling her head against his shoulder.

A chuckle rumbles from his chest as he kisses the top of her head. “Taking care of you,” he answers, bringing them both across the threshold of the washroom.

-------------------------------------------

Tav awakens the next morning alone, tucked snuggly in her bed. The events of the night are hazy as she slowly regains consciousness. She doesn't recall when or how she fell asleep. Peeling off the covers and giving herself a quick look over, she realizes she's dressed in her nightgown again. The ties are neatly in place, eerily similar to how she had them before.

Looking around her room, there's no evidence that Astarion had been present. The papers she swore fell to the floor are all stacked neatly on her dresser. The candle has been hushed out, and her windows closed.

Was it a dream? she ponders, heart rate rising as her confusion grows.

Her eyes scan the room frantically in an attempt to find a single piece out of place. Finally, she finds the answer she is searching for laying atop her vanity. Rising out of bed, Tav walks over to find a single rose laid across the top of the desk. He was here, Tav notes to herself, bringing the rose to her face. She inhales its sweet scent, dread filling her heart as the heavy weight of last night begins to actualize.

No, it was very real. And it’s only just beginning.

#astarion #ascended astarion #bg3 #bg3 astarion #astarion smut #astarion ancunin #fanfiction #astarion angst #astarion x tav #astarion romance #astarion x female tav #my writing #bg3 fanfiction

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lady-pug · 5 months ago

Text

Written Between the Lines

Chapter I - In Between These Lines

Summary: Aemond had been avoiding you all day, and you were determined to get some answers, and maybe comfort him when he needed you to.

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x Reader

Word count: 2,4k

Warnings: canon-typical incest (uncle-niece)

Notes: Hello hello! It's the day of the (official) release of the season 2 finale of HotD and I thought it was the perfect time to publish this. I have been meaning to write for this fandom for quite some time now, and this one had been on my mind for quite some time now and I decided to write it down and see where it went, and I’m quite proud of how it turned out.

Just to clear some things up: reader is Rhaenyra’s eldest child (yes, I went for that trope), being one or two years younger than Aemond and one or two years older than Jace (so she and Aemond are more or less the same age). This first chapter is set on the same day of the Pink Dread incident (season 1, episode 6), which means they are children. (Also, I don't understand anything of palm reading, but that's kinda the whole point)

I really hope you, dear reader, enjoy this and have fun while reading it. If you spot any mistakes, please feel free to warn me and I'll correct it right away, and feedback is always welcome and appreciated. I hope you truly enjoy this story.

Reader is female, but no physical descriptions provided

Next chapter | Masterlist | Read on AO3

He had been ignoring you all day. The only time you even managed to catch a glimpse of him was on the courtyard during his training lessons with Ser Criston, accompanied by both your brothers and his own. It was pretty boring, really, watching from afar as it would be considered ‘improper’ for you to join them, even though both your father and Ser Harwin had taken upon themselves to teach you the ways of the steel in secret (even though you had a strong suspicion your mother was well aware of it). At least you got some free entertainment for the day, watching Ser Harwin beat the absolute shit out of Cole.

Serves him right for being cunt to my brothers, you had thought.

You’d normally prefer to spend your afternoons with Helaena, truly enjoying the girl’s company, her fascination with bugs and beetles and her clever mind never failing to make you smile. However, you’d later have to apologize to your aunt for skipping on your daily meeting as you ventured around the keep in search of her brother. You were supposed to meet at the weirwood tree after he got back from going to the pit with the boys so you could work on your high valyrian lessons together, but as the minutes passed you began to worry and set out to find him.

You thoroughly believed he wasn’t even going to show up at supper, his mother smiling softly albeit crookedly upon your questioning, claiming he was feeling indisposed, but to your surprise he did come in if only a little late. He wasn’t acting like himself, however, choosing to sit in the seat furthest away from you, where he would normally sit right by your side, leaving the seat vacant for Aegon to sit next to you, his abhorrent manners at the table almost making you physically recoil. He didn’t look at anyone, nor did he speak to anyone unless spoken to and he seemed way more interested in poking around his food than actually eating it. And once the meal was over and everyone was excused he practically vanished, rushing out of the hall before you could even rise to your feet.

Now, as night had fallen, you were determined to find him and get some answers. Goosebumps formed on your skin as you ventured deeper in the hidden passages of the Keep where your sword lessons were held, the chilly air of King’s Landing biting at your exposed arms. You walked with confidence, knowing for a fact both your chambers were connected through these halls. You just hoped to the Old Gods and the New that you did in fact know where you were going and that you didn’t accidentally walk in on Aegon doing something very morally questionable with one of the servants.

Please let it be this one, you prayed as your fingers pressed against a loose panel on the wall.

And it seemed you had to look no further. Aemond was half submerged in a bath arranged in the middle of the room (confirming these were, indeed, his chambers), the ends of his hair sticking to his skin as water clung to the strands. Upon hearing the wall moving he startled, his eyes widening as he desperately scrambled to try and cover some of his modesty, even though you could barely see anything below the waterline.

“B-by the Gods!” he squirmed, clearly not expecting visitors at this hour, and you felt an amused smirk building on your lips at his attempts at covering up.

“Worry not, uncle.” you jested walking closer to the tub after closing the secret door behind you “You seem to forget I have three younger brothers. It’s nothing I haven’t seen before.”

His cheeks tinged with a bright shade of pink.

“What in the Seven Hells are you doing here?!” he tried once again to cover up, trying to look anywhere but at you standing in the middle of his chambers in only your nightclothes.

“Why have you been avoiding me?” you asked, the smirk promptly slipping from your face.

He seemed momentarily taken aback by such a question, looking away almost… ashamed?

“I have done no such thing, I have just been busy?” he tried, though his words lacked any conviction and ended up sounding more like a question.

“You promised to meet me after going to the Dragonpit.” you spoke softly “But you never came.”

At this he didn’t have a rebuttal, not one that wouldn’t give too much away, so he simply shrugged, his gaze cast down into the water. But you could tell from the way he shrunk under your gaze that there was something more to it.

“Did something happen in the Dragonpit?” you asked, taking a couple of slow and careful steps closer to him. When he stayed silent, only scrunching his eyes as if it physically pained him to think about it, you tried again “Aemond… what happened at the Dragonpit?”

“Nothing happened!” he snapped, his eyes brimming with unshed tears, before his voice acquired a venomous tone “Now if you could excuse me, little niece, I find myself quite occupied at the moment and don’t have the time to entertain you right now. Go meddle on somebody else’s business.”

Had you been anybody else you’d have left by now, with your tail between your legs and tears dripping down your face over the lashing of his tongue. And although his words did sting and left you feeling slightly humiliated, you stood your ground. You’d like to think that after all these years, having grown up together in the Red Keep, you’d come to know your uncle, your friend, better than anyone by now. You knew he, very much like yourself, was more reserved in his feelings, keeping them to himself, but once they finally bubbled over they tended to burn everything in their path. Aemond, like you, was the blood of the dragon after all. And you had come to learn that when he was hurting he tended to lash out at anyone and everyone around him, intending to inflict the same hurt onto others so he wasn’t left alone in his misery.

So, taking a steadying breath, you closed the distance between the two of you, carefully climbing inside the tub with him. The water was lukewarm, and given the propensities of the members of the Targaryen family to enjoy their baths scalding hot, it told you that he’d probably been here for quite a while now, sulking alone.

As you lowered yourself into the water, he pressed himself further into the side of the wooden tub, trying to stay as further away from you as possible.

“T-this is hardly appropriate, niece.” he stammered, trying not to let his eyes curiously wander down to your now soaked nightgown.

You stayed silent for a moment, contemplating the situation you found yourself in, but you’d gone too far now to back down without the answers you seek.

“So, are you going to tell me what the matter is?”

He didn’t answer, but even though he refused to look directly at you, you spotted a lone tear escaping down his cheek.

“Aemond-”

“They gave me a pig.” he whispered, his gaze once again cast down.

“What?”

He swallowed thickly, his eyes finally meeting yours, and you could see the weight of the anger and the shame he’d been caring throughout the entire day.

“After Jacaerys finished his training with Vermax, he, Aegon and Lucerys mentioned they had found a dragon for me.” his voice wavered slightly as he recounted the event “I should not have believed them, I was such a fool… they brought a pig, decorated with wings and all.” more tears escaped his eyes, your heart clenching in your chest at the sight “‘The Pink Dread’ they called it.”

“Oh, Aemond-”

“I don’t want your pity, niece!” he lashed out once again, and you had to remind yourself it wasn’t personal “If that is all you came here for you can see yourself out.”

You pursed your lips, a frown etched on your face. You knew how much it pained him to remain dragonless. He had shared his thoughts with you once in the library after your lessons in high valyrian, way past the time you should have retired to your respective chambers. How he thought himself a disgrace to the Targaryen name, ashamed at not having a dragon for himself when even your younger brother Luke already had Arrax. You tried to console him but he was having none of it, too caught up in his self-loathing to listen. So you knew nothing you said could comfort him how he deserved.

An idea struck you. It was a stupid one, and you didn’t even know if it would work, but you had to try even if it backfired spectacularly. So you scooted closer to him in the tub, fitting between his spread legs without touching him, and extended your palm out.

“What are you doing?” he asked, eyes wide and confused.

“Give me your hand.”

“What?”

“Just give me your hand.” you coaxed, making come-hither with your extended fingers.

Once he realized you weren’t going to give him any further explanation, he did as he was told, laying his hand over your own, his palm facing down, which you quickly turned around. You started tracing the lines on his palm gently with your other hand, so concentrated you barely noticed the goosebumps forming on his skin from your ministrations.

“What-?” he started but you were quick to cut him off with a gentle ‘shhh’, which promptly shut him up, only slightly offended.

“See here?” you pointed at one of the lines in his palm, tracing it with your finger “It is your line of life. See how long it is? It means you shall live a long and fulfilling life.”

He glanced at you, still not understanding a word you were saying, and you gave him a soft, encouraging smile.

“And see this one?” you pointed to another line “This is your line of heart. It turns upwards, which means you will be wed to a nice lady one day, and that you will love eachother very deeply and rejoice in your happiness together.”

You don’t know why saying that made your heart ache only slightly, but the sight of a smile slowly but surely curling on his lips made it all worth it, as it meant your plan was working.

“And here,” you curled your fingers, closing his hand inside your own, and pointing to the lines that formed on the outer side “two deep lines and one shallow, meaning you’ll have three children when you grow older, two daughters and a son. And from how deep these two lines are, the girls will be very beautiful, they will probably give you a headache from how many suitors they will have.”

To this he chuckled, his tears long forgotten, and you giggled along with him.

“And here…” you opened his hand once again, and pointed to a long vertical line that crossed almost the entirety of his palm “is your line of the dragon. Only those of Targaryen descent have this one on their palms, see?” you pointed to your own hand which showed a similar line, different only in length “It means you will have a dragon one day.”

At this his face fell and he tried to rip his hand from you, but you held onto it firmly.

“The lines don’t lie.” you rushed to explain, now focused on his eyes as they softened at your words “You can check for yourself. Your brother and sister both have it on their hands, my own brothers have it. Seven Hells, you can even check Princess Rhaenys hands, she has one as well.”

You searched his eyes for any trace of doubt and found none.

“You will have a dragon one day, Aemond.” you squeezed his hand to emphasize our point “I’m sure of it.”

His smile grew on his face, sheepish but sincere, only a flick of his lips away from becoming a smirk.

“You just came up with all that, didn’t you?” he asked, and you gasped in mock offense, pushing against his shoulder.

“You wound me, uncle!” you pressed your hand against your heart “Why would I do such a thing?”

A beat passed before both of you burst out laughing, not one bit concerned the guards stationed just outside his door could probably hear you. You were glad you could make him smile again and give him some comfort, knowing you had succeeded on your mission.

As you both calmed down you looked at him once again, truly looked at him. He was quite beautiful when he smiled, and oh, how you wished he would do it more often around you. In that moment only the two of you existed, together. When asked later you wouldn’t be able to tell what came over you in that very moment, but once you realized what you were doing you had surged forward, pressing your lips against his in the gentlest, softest of kisses.

No sooner had your lips come in contact with his own, you were pulling back, eyes widening in panic. His own were blown wide as well, surprised by your actions. You didn’t waste a second climbing out of the tub, almost toppling over the side in your rush, your drenched nightclothes making your task all the more difficult.

“Wait!” he tried to hold onto you but you were quicker “Please, don’t go, I-!”

But you were already making your way to the hidden passage on the wall and disappearing from his chambers. He would have thought he had fallen asleep in the bath and dreamed the whole thing had it not been for the dark trail left behind going from the tub all the way to the wall from where water had dripped from your body in your haste to get away.

And if, come the next morrow, he forcefully grabbed his mother’s hand and flip it to look at her palms, much to her protests, and notice a line present on the exact place where you had pointed the so called ‘line of the dragon’ the night before, his smile gave away the gratitude he felt for you at that moment.

#aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen x f!reader #aemond targaryen x fem!reader #aemond targaryen fic #aemond targaryen x velaryon!reader #aemond targaryen x targaryen!reader #aemond targaryen x niece!reader #house of the dragon #hotd fanfic

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act-nat-ural · 2 months ago

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g’day! i saw that you're receiving requests: so is it OK to request osamu with his significant other who calls him "ochamu" instead of "osamu" just to get a reaction out of him? sort of like baby talking his name if that makes sense??? i think it's super funny that he might look at you like you're crazy at first then get used to it overtime (atsumu gives him the side eye every single time) 😭

but ofc, this is more of a suggestion if anything ^^ feel free to delete/ignore if it doesn't spark any inspo or you don't have any thoughts on it! ++ i know you wrote abt samu recently so maybe he should wait a little longer to get his turn PFFT. thanks for your time btw! i love your workssss ✨

Baby Talk

note: I love your brain omg- this was so fun to write lol. Hope you like it!!!

“Ochamuuu, pay attention to me.”

The moment the word ‘Ochamu’ was uttered from your lips, Osamu did not react positively. Sitting on the other side of the sofa, you see his lip curl in disgust. The side eye directed towards you was lethal.

“What. Was. That.”

It was hard, but you managed to hold your giggles in. You pull the most innocent face you can and say, “What do you mean, Ochamu?”

He immediately gags and puts his hand out at you. “Oh my god. No. Babe, what the fuck.” He's looking at you like you grew a second head. You laugh and punch his arm.

“What? What did I do?” He raises his brows and laughs, perplexed.

“What did ya do? Ya sound stupid. Don't do that again, it was creepy.”

You giggle again and respond, “I love you, ‘chamu.” His frown gets even deeper as he stands up from the couch and walks away shaking his head.

“I love you too, but no. Just no.”

–

“Ochamu, pass the salt please.” You ask sweetly. He stops mid bite and turns to you unimpressed.

“Really? This again?” You hum and shrug your shoulders. “I have no idea what you are referring to, my dear husband.” He gives a small smile and resumes eating.

“Now that's a nickname I can get behind. The other one, not so much. How the hell did ya come up with that anyway?” He questions, finally handing you what you asked for.

“I honestly don’t know. I think it came to me in a dream or something.” You gasp. “It was a message from a higher power. Ochamu is your destined nickname, I'm sure of it.” He lets out a little chuckle at that and places a kiss on your cheek.

“Sure, whatever. If it keeps you entertained, I'll allow it.”

–

“Ochamu, have you seen my brush?” You inquire as you pop your head out of the bathroom. He's sitting on your bed, scrolling through his phone.

Without looking up, he answers, “It's on the dresser, baby.” You bite back a smile.

“Not a single comment this time, huh?” He blinks and glances up at you.

“What do ya mean?”

You let out a shocked laugh. “Wha- you didn’t even notice?! I used that nickname you hate.” He groans and throws a pillow at you. “Yer usin’ it too damn much! Messin’ with my head!” He huffs and crosses his arms. You roll your eyes and move to sit down next to him.

“Admit you like the baby talk.” He gives you another dose of side eye.

“I’d rather not.”

–

You, Osamu, and Atsumu had all decided to go grocery shopping for dinner ingredients. Rather, you and Osamu were, and Atsumu tagged along because he was bored. Osamu was in charge of the list, Atsumu was pushing the cart, and you were the one grabbing the ingredients. You were walking aisle to aisle, taking your time, while Atsumu was grumbling like a bored child.

“Ochamu, what's next on the list?” He opens his mouth to respond but gets cut off.

“Ew, what the hell?” Atsumu makes a grossed out face and does a barfing motion. “Yer such a weirdo! ‘Samu, ya let her call ya that?!” Osamu scoffs and takes your hand, leaving Atsumu behind.

“Yer just jealous yer single. Scrub.” You can still hear Atsumu squawking when you get to the next aisle.

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #hq #hq drabble #osamu miya #osamu x reader #osamu miya x reader #osamu haikyuu #osamu miya x you #haikyuu crack #miya osamu #fem!reader #haikyuu x female reader #request

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adelheidvonschicksal · 9 months ago

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hiii!! how are you? god, it's my first time requesting and I'm super awkward but I've been kinda having this dark mc brain rot! what would the love and Deepspace boys do with a secret gambler mc who's just like yumeko jabami? that'd be so interesting! feel free to ignore this ask if that makes you uncomfortable and have a nice day!

🎲 LND Scenarios with Dark Gambler!MC

🎲 Synopsis: Love and Deepspace men dealing with their dark gambler partner's eccentrics.

🎲 Pairing: LND x GN!Reader

🎲 Content Warning: sexual undertones, mild humor, no pronouns/looks mentioned (Jabami is for the aesthetic), Zayne is the only one vibing, there's no mercy in kitty cards!

🎲 A/N: Thanks for letting me take a crack at your request. I never watched Kakeguri but I think I got the vibe! I did tone the behavior down a little to fit LND more but I think you'll be satisfied. Zayne's part turned into my favorite even though I had the hardest time thinking of a scene for him!

“Let me have a turn.”

Xavier shudders at the dark aura he senses behind him despite the sweet smile plastered on your face. It’s almost like seeing a demon reflecting in the glass of the claw machine but in the form of an angel. He knew it was a bad idea to come to the arcade. He was no good at the machine no matter how much he tried and the nearly empty bowl where his tokens once laid was the proof.

“It’s alright. I didn’t think I could get it anyway. I’m not really good at this game.”

You frown at him. “It’s not you, love. These games are designed to cheat people out their money. It's disgusting really.”

Xavier gulps at that word. Cheat. If there was one thing you hated in this world, it was unfairness. The crooked smile forming on your face forces him to return eye contact with the special edition bunny plush he’s failed to get time and time again. Somehow, he sees fear in its eyes.

“I’ll get it for you.” Your hand reaches into the coin bowl; each clink makes his throat tighten as you finally pull out one of the coins between your fingers. “That bunny will be coming home with us.”

Xavier knows there’s little he can do when you sound that determined. Luckily, you won the bunny in two attempts.

“Ta-da! A fluffy bunny for my fluffy bunny.”

A sense of relief washes over him when the round rabbit hits his hands. Maybe he was being overly paranoid. However, his relief is quickly buffed out by anxiety when he sees you place another coin in the machine. It’s only a few seconds before the chimes of the machine go off again. Then, you pass him another toy, a carrot this time.

“Every bunny needs a snack!” you coo, but your tone carries that familiar edge that makes the hair on the back of his neck stand. “Now, whom shall we capture next?”

To Xavier, it sounds less like a question and more like a decree of war. “I think these two are more than enough for today."

“Xavier, this game stole forty dollars from you. I’m not going to let it get away with that,” you declare, proving it was just as he feared as your voice lowers. “Now, which one do you want, dear? Oh, I know, I'll just win them all for you! How does that sound?" you ask, but Xavier is eerily aware that it won’t matter what he says when you’re like this.

“Here we go!” you mewl as the claw begins to whir up.

Ignoring the shiver that climbs up his spine when your voice drips with the venom of ecstasy, there’s little Xavier can do but take another step back, buy another bowl of coins, and hold them for you as the role of a supportive boyfriend.

It’s an hour later when he finds himself surrounded by plushies, much more than he can hold, and the fear that you’re going to get kicked out the arcade any second.

“Cleaned out again!” you announce with a shrill breathy gasp, the giggle you give reminding him of the maniacal laughter Lemonette chortles out whenever the wanderer sprays lemon juice in his eyes. “Tell the employees we need another refill.”

“We don't have enough hands to carry all the ones you already won.”

“What?” Your focus finally breaks from the game and to the many toys scattered on the floor around him, overtaking his feet, then to the worried look on his face. “I went overboard again, didn’t I?”

Xavier sighs. “I think that’s pretty obvious.”

“Why didn’t you stop me?”

“How do you suggest I do that?” he asks with a shake of his head. “You’re impossible to stop.”

You flutter your eyelashes at him innocently. “I did get you your bunny though!”

“At the cost of the poor arcade owner’s precious sanity,” he reminds you but the smile on his face is less than scolding when he sees the guilty sulk you have and the lax of your shoulders. “Let’s find a donation center to drop these little guys off. We’ll count it as our good deed for the month.”

“Good idea! How about we surprise all the kids at the hospital?” you agree. Xavier chuckles. There’s the angel again.

“Pretty please, Rafayel!”

The painter rolls his eyes, scooting further away from you to find a different spot on the floor to sit as you crawl after him. Rafayel turns his head away and strokes his paintbrush down the center of his canvas.

“No. Now, go away. Shoo. Shoo, go paw at someone else,” he says, waving the wet paintbrush at you.

“But no one else will play with me,” you whine.

“I wonder why?”

You are terrifying when you play kitty cards. Unfortunately, he was once the only one foolish enough to play with you because he wasn’t aware of how you got when you gambled even when the winnings were only a few pieces of chocolate. He knows better now. Despite your cute precious face, you were evil incarnate when it came to games.

“Surely, you pity me my dear sweet, gorgeous boyfriend. Did I forget to mention talented?” You give him the puppy eyes to try to wear down his resolve; your hand glides over his bangs, lovingly pushing them from his face. As much as he loves trying to make you happy, this is one of the few things in the world that he refuses to listen to you about.

“As true as all of that may be, I prefer living thanks,” he says before switching brushes to another color. A splash of blue would be excellent.

“Is this about last time?” you ask him. “It was an accident.”

“You nearly broke my hand!”

“You were trying to swap the kitties!” you yell back. Rafayel was a no-good cheater when it came to playing games and not the least bit sorry about it. It’s not your fault that you grabbed his hand by reflex nor that he was so dramatic about it.

“So, the sentence is hand breaking? That's cruel and unusual punishment!” he says with a gasp.

"Is it wrong to take away your tool for cheating?"

“Have you forgotten what I do for a living? You might as well lay me out in the sun to dry.”

Sighing, you decide to agree with him. You suppose you could be a little competitive when it came to games. Besides, they say it’s easier to catch more flies with honey. “Look, I’m sorry, baby,” you apologize and smooth out a hand over his thigh. “How about I give you a super special prize if you win.”

Rafayel barely looks at you from the corner of his eyes that slowly drop to where your hand rests on his leg. You’re on your hands and knees next to him, perched up like a cat begging to be petted.

“I’m listening,” he says, continuing to mix his paints. Purring, you lean in and whisper in his ear the prizes you’re willing to trade for him to play one little round with you.

His heart races with each word. It’s suddenly becoming harder to keep the stroke of the brush straight when your hand starts to trail further and further up his thigh. “Well, when you put it that way—” and he almost gives in until he sees the corner of your lips curling up into a smirk. “Wait. No. I refuse.”

“Not even if—” and you whisper in his ear again. He swears the brush handle will splinter if he grips it any tighter. His face is glowing a light red by the time you pull away. He might be Lumerian but he’s still a man; it’s difficult to bury the memories of pleasure under the memories of his fingers squeezing in your hard grip the last time you caught him cheating. He manages, somehow.

“How easy do you think I am? I’m not open for business whenever you want, darling.” He manages to spat out, not exactly the best rejection but it’ll suffice.

You puff up your cheeks at him. “You’re the meanest boyfriend ever!”

“And you’re evil when a card gets in your hand,” he argues back. The last thing he sees is the red of your shirt as you pounce on him and blue paint spilling across the floor.

“You’re so nice, Zayne. You’re the only one who's brave enough to play against me.”

Zayne glances up from the stack of cards in his hands to catch your tongue glancing over your lips to wet them as you stare him down with dilated eyes. He expected you to get worked up but not quite this early into the game.

“I had the free time today.”

The real reason he schedules these regular games with you is to keep your strange habit under control, like providing a little bit of a drug to an addict; or in simpler terms, walking an overly energetic Husky so it won’t tear up the furniture. It beats the many times you ring him up at two in the morning, needing him to come rescue you out of a tough situation. He knows you’ll never learn your lesson with him always swooping in when needed, but he can’t stand the possibility of you getting hurt should he not come to your rescue every time you over bet your hand and need him to win back your money for you. The doctor never really expected to be a poker or kitty card expert at this age but alas.

“I’m guessing there’s at least one Kitty Plot in your hand, am I right?” you ask him; and he doesn’t understand how you sound more excited each time he obtains another assist card.

“And if I told you there was?”

The giggle you let out sounds much too vulgar for a simple game of kitty cards, but he’s used to this eccentricity of yours at this point. “Then that means I get to beat you even when you’re at your best!”

You slap down a Freeze card and Skip card. There’s not much he can do other than draw his assist card and ride out your next turn. In the next phase, you throw out another assist card, one that will allow you to restock your empty number stockpile and seal your victory.

“Any last words?” you ask him. He can see that you’re starting to twitch with the excitement that comes from besting him. It’s the most dramatic thing he’s seen, but he’d be a liar to say it wasn’t…satisfying…to watch your face fill with shock as he blocks your finishing move with a Meow This. Maybe you were rubbing off on him after all, he muses.

“You held on to that all this time?” you ask him, recalling the many chances he could’ve blocked your earlier plays. You were aware he was luring you into a trap by playing the slow game, but you thought you could get around it this time. With a dreamy sigh, you cup your cheek in your hand. “I should’ve known. Just careless.”

“Any last words?” he asks, mocking your earlier victory line.

“None I’m afraid. I’m completely at your mercy; helpless in the face of your onslaught,” you tell him, and he ignores the little tilt of seduction lacing your voice and the squirming of your thighs as he starts erasing every point you’ve earned.

Slowly, your points decrease one by one as he throws out assist after assist while you let out little whimpers and mutter compliments under your breath with each cup color change and point reducer he throws out.

You’re going to lose! Again! He’s incredible as always.

But you’re offered deliverance when instead of erasing the six points of your blue kitty the cup color changes to match it. You hear Zayne “tch” under his breath, and you can’t help but laugh when he finally has to give up and fill the last white kitty cup with a pathetic low-level kitten.

In the end, you only won by two points but that was all you needed.

“I won…I won!” you repeat, rocking back and forth as you hug yourself and toss your head back. “I finally beat you! You won’t believe how long I waited for this day! Now what should my prize be?” You fall back onto the floor, kicking your feet. “It’s so hard to decide. I honestly didn’t think this day would come! There are so many things I’ve dreamed of making you do for me!”

Zayne presses his lips into a thin line as he begins to collect the kittens from the cup. “Calm down. You’re drooling on the carpet,” he exaggerates, not that you're in the right mind to listen.

“I got it. I know just what I want,” you squeal, holding your finger in your mouth to muffle your laughs. Zayne tenses when you sit up, much like a vampire from a horror movie, and lock eyes with him; he doesn’t think he’s felt so targeted since his days in the military.

“Meow for me, Zayne,” you demand, and his face burns at the ridiculousness of your request.

“You—”

“Are you backing out? That’s poor sportsmanship especially considering I took every nasty medicine each time you won.”

Zayne shakes his head. “No. I was simply thinking that’s surprisingly tame for you.”

You lift your eyebrows curiously. “So, does that mean?”

Zayne leans in over the table. In this position, he can see how your face softens from that lust-filled haze that gambling always manages to place over you. He doesn’t know if you can actually get embarrassed, but you certainly look flustered as he locks eyes with you.

“Meow.”

“Oh,” you gasp, eyes wide. “T-That was absolutely wonderful,” you blurt out with a clasp of your hands. “Do it again.”

“It was a one-time deal,” Zayne rejects before straightening his back.

“I didn’t think you would do it. One more little meow for me?” you plead. “This was a special victory, and I didn’t get to enjoy my winnings properly.”

“If you want to hear it again, I’m afraid you’ll have to beat me a second time,” he answers bluntly.

“And if you win?”

“You do what I want.”

“Which is?”

Zayne smirks at you. “All I can tell you is that I’ll ask for much more than a meow.”

“You’re on! You’re on! You’re on! What better way to solidify my position as the best kitty card player than with a streak?”

“I take it we’re playing on Hell Mode then.”

“What do you mean? It’s always heaven playing against you, Zayne. You’re the only one who can give an actual challenge,” you sweetly coo, nearly a moan. “Unfortunately, your reign will officially be coming to an end. I’m going to beat you without luck; and when I do, I think I’ll make you meow and purr for my reward.”

“Hurry and restart the match then if you believe that.”

Zayne watches as you excitedly set the game back up. He supposes that this type of gambling is more fun than gambling with chocolates. At least until he sees your social media message the next morning.

Guess who finally toppled the old king and became the new Ruler of Kitty Cards? I won’t name them. No one asked. It’s not polite to be a sore loser, my adorable meowing subject.

#zayne x reader #xavier x reader #rafayel x reader #love and deepspace x reader #lnd x reader #notsfw #adelssmut

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itendtothinkalot · 6 months ago

Text

page.soobin (classic enemies to lovers)

Summary: reader just opened a cute little bookstore cafe and soobin is a loud pretentious asshole that talks loudly on his phone lol

Genre: fluffy

Characters: soobin x f!reader

Words: 3k?? i think

Completed (oneshot)

tw: soobin's an asshole but like the good kind so does it really matter

a/n: i hope this makes up for the soobin in my last story sorry lol

It had barely been a year since ‘Pages’ had opened. You had worked hard to save up enough money to open your dream bookstore/cafe. A quaint little rustic-looking bookshop right next to the hustle and bustle of Seoul. Shelves lined with your favourite books, lights dimly lit to accentuate the atmosphere, the scent of freshly brewed coffee taking up space in your lovely quiet bookstore. Pages had been your haven. A getaway from the corporate world that sucked your energy. Having a previously well-paid job, however, did you justice.

Though Pages was still new, you had already gained a few regulars who would occasionally pop in to read the latest editions of the mangas you’d specially acquired.

“Here. Especially for you, I even tabbed the best parts. Don’t skip ahead though.” You chuckled, smiling at one of your favourite customers who you befriended.

“Thanks! I’ll have the usual, by the way.” Kai said, as his eyes scanned the manga you had just passed him.

“It’s just you today? Where’s…uh…what’s his name again?” You enquired.

“Beomgyu?”

“No, the one who talks less.” You joked.

“Ah, Taehyun? He has work. C'mon now, I'm not good enough for you?”

You rolled your eyes, "I was just wondering. Taehyun was asking for a book and I finally found it!"

"I'll tell him about it. Thanks. You really are our favourite bookstore owner." Kai grinned.

"You're not getting another free drink from flattery." You rolled your eyes.

"Aw man."

"I'm kidding. The drink's on the house. The manga however is not."

"Deal!"

You nodded, turning to prepare Kai’s order when you heard the door chime once more.

Your heart sank a little as you saw Soobin walk in, his usual confident grin plastered on his face.

Soobin, the travel writer who had recently moved to town, had a knack for disrupting the peace of your beloved bookstore. He strolled up to the counter, oblivious to your internal groan.

Sure, he was good-looking. Sure, you've thought about how it would be like to be next to him calling him your boyfriend and showing him off to everyone but...dear God, did he also grind your gears.

“Morning! The usual, please,” Soobin said, leaning casually against the counter.

You forced a polite smile. “Good morning, Soobin. One iced Americano, coming right up.”

As you prepared his coffee, you couldn’t help but feel a mix of irritation and curiosity. Soobin’s presence always managed to throw your day off balance, yet there was something undeniably intriguing about him. It could’ve been his good looks or just the fact he was always talking about these wondrous travels that you’d never been on. You couldn’t decide.

Plus, he was just really hot.

“So, how’s the book coming along?” you asked, attempting small talk as you handed him his drink.

“Slowly,” he admitted with a sigh. “But this place helps. It’s got a charm that’s hard to find anywhere else.”

You raised an eyebrow, surprised by his sincerity. “Well, I’m glad you like it here.”

He took a sip of his iced Americano, his eyes meeting yours with a teasing glint. “I do. Even if the owner is a bit of a tyrant.”

Your smile turned frosty. “Maybe if certain customers respected the rules, the owner wouldn’t have to be.”

His grin widened, unfazed. “Rules are meant to be bent a little. Keeps life interesting.”

“Interesting for you, maybe. A headache for me,” you retorted, your patience wearing thin.

“Come on, admit it. You’d miss me if I stopped coming,” Soobin said with a smirk, clearly enjoying the verbal sparring.

“Like a toothache,” you shot back, rolling your eyes. “Just try not to scare off my customers with your loud phone calls.”

“Sure,” he said with a wink, turning to find his usual spot by the window.

As you watched him settle in, your irritation simmered. Soobin had a way of getting under your skin like no one else. It was infuriating, yet there was something about his confident, carefree attitude that you couldn’t entirely dismiss. Maybe, just maybe, there was more to Soobin than met the eye—but you weren’t ready to admit that just yet.

It was peaceful for the first 30 minutes of his presence. Then you heard Soobin’s atrocious ringtone blaring, shattering the calm like a sledgehammer through glass. That usually meant it was the end of your peace.

“Hello?” Soobin answered loudly, his voice carrying across the bookstore.

You clenched your fists, trying to maintain your composure. Customers glanced up from their books, their expressions mirroring your annoyance. You marched over to Soobin, who was obliviously engaged in his conversation.

“Soobin,” you hissed, trying to keep your voice low yet firm. “Can you please take your call outside?”

He looked up at you, seemingly surprised by your irritation. “Just a minute, I’m almost done,” he mouthed, holding up a finger, pressing them against your lips.

You crossed your arms, glaring at him until he reluctantly stood up and moved toward the door, still talking animatedly. As he stepped outside, you let out a frustrated sigh, hoping the rest of his call would be brief.

When he finally returned, he had the audacity to smile at you as if nothing had happened. “Sorry about that. Important call.”

You gave him a tight-lipped smile. “Next time, please take it outside from the start.”

He chuckled. “You really do enjoy being a tyrant, don’t you?”

“And you really enjoy pushing my buttons,” you shot back, turning on your heel to walk away.

“Clearly.” He teased, following you further into your bookstore.

As you continued to walk away, you felt Soobin's presence lingering behind you. Despite your attempts to ignore him, his persistence was impossible to overlook. You sighed inwardly, reminding yourself that he was just a customer, albeit a particularly annoying one.

"So, what’s the special today?" Soobin asked, trying to keep up with your pace.

You stopped and turned to face him, your patience wearing thinner by the second. "It’s written on the board, Soobin. Right where it always is."

He glanced over at the board, a mischievous grin forming on his lips. "Ah, right. Guess I didn’t see it. Too busy looking at the pretty owner."

You rolled your eyes, suppressing the small smile that threatened to break through. "Flattery won’t get you free coffee, Soobin."

He laughed, the sound oddly infectious. "Worth a shot. Anyway, I wanted to ask you something."

You raised an eyebrow, genuinely curious despite your irritation. "What is it?"

"I’m planning a feature on hidden gems in Seoul for my next piece," he explained, his tone more serious now. "I was hoping to include Pages. Maybe do a little interview with you about the place?"

You blinked, taken aback by his request. "You want to feature Pages in your article? What’s your motive?"

He nodded. "No hidden agenda, I promise. This place has something special, and I think more people should know about it. Plus, it might bring in more customers."

The idea was tempting. Any publicity was good publicity, and if it brought more people to Pages, it would be worth it. But you couldn't shake off the feeling that Soobin had ulterior motives.

"I’ll think about it," you replied cautiously. "I’m not sure I’m comfortable with the spotlight."

He shrugged, unfazed. "No pressure. Just let me know. It could be fun."

You watched as he returned to his seat, wondering if agreeing to his proposal would be a mistake or an opportunity. Soobin was unpredictable, but maybe there was more to his offer than just another way to get under your skin.

The rest of the day passed in a blur of coffee orders, book recommendations, and the occasional chat with regulars. Kai left with a satisfied grin, promising to return with his friends. As the sun began to set, casting a warm glow over the bookstore, you found yourself thinking about Soobin’s offer again.

Before you knew it, the day had ended, and you were locking up the store. The streets outside were quiet, a stark contrast to the busy day you’d had. As you turned to leave, you noticed a small note taped to the door.

"Think about the article. It could be great for Pages. - Soobin."

You sighed, pocketing the note. Maybe he was right. Maybe this was an opportunity to show Seoul what Pages had to offer. You decided to sleep on it, hoping a good night’s rest would bring clarity.

The next day, you woke up at the crack of dawn. A yawn escaped your lips as you rummaged through your bags for the keys to Pages.

Sighing, you entered your beloved bookstore. Humming your favorite song, you unlocked the door, inhaling the aroma of the coffee beans you had meticulously selected.

“Am I your first customer today?” You spun around to see Soobin grinning. His tall stature loomed over you, and the strong smell of his cologne filled the air. The toothy grin plastered across his face was unmistakable. He wore a large sweater that hid the muscles you remembered seeing the day the A/C broke, and he had to take off his hoodie. That had been a good day.

“We’re barely open,” you answered, your voice barely a whisper from the sudden surprise of his presence.

“Well…I just couldn’t wait to hear your answer.”

You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. "Soobin, it's way too early for this kind of enthusiasm."

He laughed, the sound echoing pleasantly through the empty bookstore. "Come on, just give me a hint. Are you going to let me do the interview?"

You crossed your arms, pretending to ponder. "I still need my morning coffee to think straight."

Soobin raised an eyebrow, looking at you expectantly. "I'll make a deal with you. If you say yes, I'll buy the first ten customers their coffee today."

You couldn't help but laugh at his persistence. "Bribery now, huh?"

"Call it incentive," he replied with a wink.

You sighed, feeling your resolve waver. "Alright, fine. We can do the interview. But if you turn this place into a circus, I'll never forgive you."

Soobin's grin widened, and he pumped his fist in victory. "Deal! I promise it'll be great."

You shook your head, amused by his excitement. "Okay, okay. Let's get started before I change my mind."

As you prepared Soobin’s usual iced Americano, you couldn’t help but feel a mixture of anticipation and nervousness.

"So, where do you want to start?" you asked, handing him his drink.

Soobin took a sip, his expression thoughtful. "How about we start with you? What inspired you to open Pages?"

"Well, it was always a dream of mine. I wanted a place where people could escape, find comfort in books, and enjoy a good cup of coffee. Leaving the corporate world was scary, but this... this feels right."

He nodded, his eyes genuinely interested. "And it shows. This place has a soul, and that’s rare."

You blushed slightly, not used to such earnest compliments from him. "Thanks?"

“Not used to compliments, I see?” Soobin teased.

“Not from you.”

You shook your head, a small smile tugging at your lips. "Don't get used to it. You're still on thin ice for all those loud phone calls."

"Fair enough," he conceded, still grinning.

"You know, you're not that annoying when you're serious," you blurted out. "Sorry, that was supposed to be a thought."

"We're getting passive-aggressive," Soobin teased.

"It was supposed to be a thought," you repeated, trying to defend yourself.

"It's quite freeing to know I've had such an effect on your life," Soobin chuckled.

"Shut up," you said, rolling your eyes.

"I'm kidding. I guess I can be quite an asshole at times, but it's only because I don't know how to act around a pretty girl."

"Stop messing around," you said, feigning annoyance, though your heartbeat was telling you otherwise. "Is any part of this even in your interview notes?" you asked, gesturing to his laptop.

"Oh, no. None of it," Soobin admitted, still grinning. "Just getting to know my favorite bookstore-slash-cafe owner. Is that a crime?"

"Of course not. What's supposed to be a crime is your lack of social etiquette." You joked.

Soobin laughed, the sound warm and genuine. "Guilty as charged," he said, raising his hands in mock surrender. "But I'm willing to learn if you've got some pointers."

"Maybe walk out of the store when you have a call?" You said, raising an eyebrow.

"Right." Soobin chuckled.

"So, besides the loud phone calls and my general presence, what's your biggest pet peeve about running Pages?" Soobin asked, leaning in with genuine curiosity.

You thought for a moment, considering how honest you wanted to be. "I guess it would be dealing with the occasional rude customer who doesn't respect the space or the books. But honestly, most people who come in are wonderful. They get what this place is about."

Soobin nodded thoughtfully. "I can see that. This place has a certain... aura. It’s like a sanctuary."

"That's exactly what I wanted it to be," you said, smiling. "A place where people can escape and just... breathe."

"So about the...'wonderful people' you're talking about, does any of those include a travel writer?" Soobin peered.

You paused, meeting Soobin's gaze. There was a playful glint in his eyes, but you could sense a genuine curiosity beneath it. "Well," you began slowly, "there's this one travel writer who likes to test my patience."

"Is he hot?" Soobin asked.

"If you consider an ogre hot, sure." You joked.

Soobin chuckled, feigning hurt, clutching his chest. "Ouch. In my defense, testing one's patience is one of my specialties. But seriously, I hope I’m not always a nuisance."

"You have your moments," you admitted, a small smile tugging at your lips. "But you also bring a certain... energy to this place."

"So, is that a compliment?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Don't get too used to it," you replied, trying to hide your amusement.

As the day progressed, you and Soobin delved into the story of Pages. You talked about the challenges you faced, the joy of seeing regulars like Kai and his friends, and the special moments that made all the hard work worth it. Soobin took notes, his demeanor professional yet warm, making you feel surprisingly at ease.

You weren't going to lie, the interview made you see Soobin in a different light. He was surprisingly sexy when he was being serious. His eyebrows would furrow when trying to get information across and his posture forward almost leaning towards you.

The way he listened so intently, his focus entirely on you, made your heart flutter more than you'd like to admit. You tried to keep your composure, but it was becoming increasingly difficult to ignore the growing attraction you felt towards him.

It wasn't your fault. You had always found him incredibly attractive albeit the loud phone calls.

By the time the first customers arrived, the interview was wrapping up. Soobin stood up, a satisfied look on his face. "I think we’ve got everything we need. Thanks for trusting me with this."

You nodded, feeling a sense of accomplishment. "Just make sure you do justice to the store."

"Don’t worry," he said, flashing that familiar grin. "I’ll make sure it's perfect."

As he retreated to his seat, you felt a renewed sense of friendship. Maybe, just maybe, Soobin wasn’t as bad as you’d initially thought. Only time would tell, but for now, you were content with the decision you’d made.

It had been a few hours since the interview. Soobin was still in his usual corner, typing away, God knows what, with a serious look on his face. Holding a cup of juice in your hands, you walked toward him and placed the glass on his table.

“I didn’t order anything,” Soobin said, looking up at you.

“It’s on the house. Too much caffeine can't be good for you,” you replied, smiling awkwardly before making your way back to the counter.

As you reached the counter, you glanced back at Soobin, who had paused his typing to take a sip of the juice. He gave you a nod of appreciation, and for a moment, you felt a sense of camaraderie that was rare with him.

The rest of the afternoon passed in a blur of regular customers and new faces, each interaction reinforcing why you loved this place so much. As closing time approached, Soobin finally packed up his things and walked over to you.

"Thanks for the juice," he said, his tone softer than usual. "I really needed that break."

It was a moment of peace before his annoying ringtone went off. He looked up at you sheepishly.

“I’ll take it outside this time,” he chuckled, walking off.

You laughed, shaking your head, and turned your attention back to your work. Glancing to your left, you noticed the large pile of rubbish that hadn’t been thrown away. You groaned at the thought of lugging it into the alley. Pulling the large bag of rubbish out from behind the counter, you made your way to the back alley.

“Yeah. I’ve done the interview.” You heard Soobin’s voice echo from the back of the alley.

“Yeah. I think it’ll do great. The article. She’s got some solid work ethic and the cafe itself is a really good idea. Her thoughts are well articulated. The article's gonna be great.”

You smiled at the compliments, assuming he was talking about you. Your cheeks heated up from listening into the conversation. You felt bad for eavesdropping but this was precious information you could use to your advantage.

“Oh? What? The owner? Nah, she’s a little bit pretentious. What? Pretty? She's okay, I guess. She… she’s not that pretty in real life. The picture was doing her justice.”

Your smile faded instantly, your heart sinking at his words. You quickly turned back, dragging the bag of rubbish with a renewed sense of determination, refusing to let his words affect you.

As you heaved the bag into the dumpster, you couldn't help but replay Soobin's words in your mind. Anger and hurt mingled, forming a bitter taste in your mouth. You had always suspected he enjoyed pushing your buttons, but hearing such harsh comments felt like a betrayal especially after the interview where you felt like you had bonded with him.

Returning to the store, you busied yourself with closing duties, trying to shake off the sting of his remarks. You were scrubbing the counter with more force than necessary when you heard the door chime. You looked up to see Soobin, who had finished his call, walking back in.

"Everything okay?" he asked, noticing the change in your demeanor.

"Yeah, just finishing up," you replied curtly, not wanting to engage further.

Soobin frowned, sensing something was off. "Did something happen?"

“No and even if it did, what makes you think I’d confide into a loud pompous asshole?” You gritted your teeth, turning away from him, your ponytail smacking him in his face.

“Fucking he- Ouch!" He rubbed his cheeks from where your ponytail had smacked him. "What? What’s going on with you? I thought we were cool?”

"Cool?" you repeated, your voice rising in pitch. "You think we're cool after everything you've said and done?"

Soobin looked genuinely confused. "What are you talking about?"

“Nothing. You’re right. I’m pretentious. And maybe I’m not that attractive to you but to hear you say that to another person? Wow.”

Soobin's eyes widened as the realization hit him. "Wait, you heard that?" he said, taking a step back. "It's not what you think."

"Then what is it, Soobin?" you demanded, crossing your arms tightly across your chest. "Because it sounded pretty clear to me."

“You don’t understand,” Soobin said, his frustration evident.

“What don’t I understand?”

“That was my editor.”

“Okay?”

“His name’s Yeonjun. He’s a good-looking and decent guy.” He explained, even thought you were still clearly ever so clueless.

“What does that have to do with me?”

“He was asking for your number. He saw the picture I took of you for the article and thought you looked cute.”

“And?” You looked at him dumbfounded.

Soobin rubbed the back of his neck, looking flustered. “Je- I- Fuck. I didn’t want him to know how cool you were.”

“What?”

“Look, you’re cute. You’re my type. You’re all kinds of pretty. But you’re also someone I kind of want to gatekeep.”

“What?”

“I can’t make this clearer even if I tried,” Soobin said, his voice softer now. “I like you, okay? I didn’t want him to get to know you because I’m selfish. I wanted you all to myself.”

Soobin's admission left you momentarily speechless. "Oh," you managed to say, your mind racing to process his words.

"Yeah, oh," Soobin echoed, a small, nervous smile tugging at his lips. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I was just... I don't know, being stupid and jealous."

"If it makes you feel any better, I, too, find you..." You paused, "Cute."

Soobin's eyes lit up with a mischievous glint. "Really?" he said, a slow grin spreading across his face. "I always knew you had good taste."

You rolled your eyes, trying to hide your smile. "Don't get too full of yourself, Soobin."

He took a step closer, his confidence unwavering. "Oh, come on. Admit it. You find my charm irresistible. It’s okay, most people do."

You laughed, shaking your head. "You’re impossible."

"So, how about we start over?" Soobin suggested, his tone playful yet sincere. "As friends, or maybe something more. I promise I'll only annoy you half as much."

"Only half?" you teased, feeling a blush creep up your cheeks.

"Alright, a quarter," he conceded with a wink. "And I’ll take my phone calls outside. Most of the time."

You couldn’t help but smile at his persistence. Despite everything, there was something undeniably magnetic about Soobin. "Deal. But if you ever call me pretentious again, I won’t hesitate to throw you out of my store."

He laughed, the sound warm and infectious. "Fair enough. But just so you know, I’ve been told my obnoxiousness is part of my charm."

"By whom?" you asked, raising an eyebrow.

"By people with excellent taste," he said with a smirk.

You took a deep breath, feeling a mix of joy and mischief. "So, you like me?"

"Yeah," he said, his voice steady now. "I like you a lot. And I'm sorry if what I said made you think otherwise."

You bit your lip, contemplating his confession. "Well, you could have just told me."

"I know," he admitted, looking down at his feet. "I guess I was scared you'd reject me or think I was just messing with you."

“Well…can you blame me? You're quite the comedian sometimes.” You chuckled.

"Y'know what I don't blame you if you did doubt me."

"Really now?"

“Yeah. I get it. I'm kind of an asshole. But it's only because I like your reactions. They're pretty, um," Soobin stopped. "Charming, I'd say."

"So you think I'm charming?" You teased.

Soobin looked up, catching the playful glint in your eyes. "Yeah, well, when you spend as much time together as we do, you pick up on things. Like how your eyes light up when the new books arrive or when Kai tells you a stupid joke, and you tilt your head back to laugh, then get self-conscious and cover your mouth as if half the cafe hasn't heard your snort."

You laughed softly, feeling the remaining tension dissipate. “Okay, maybe you do know me better than I thought. You're quite the observer, aren't you, Soobin?"

"When you're a writer like me, you tend to observe things that are...more enchanting."

"Enchanting, huh. Big pretty words don't impress me, Soobin." You teased.

"I love a challenge," Soobin replied, his eyes gleaming with arrogance. "And let's be honest, how hard can it be to impress you?"

You rolled your eyes, half-amused, half-irritated. "Don't get too cocky, Soobin. Just because you can string a few sentences together doesn’t mean you can charm everyone."

"Is that so?" Soobin leaned in closer, his confidence palpable. "I seem to remember you admitting you find me attractive. Sounds like I've already charmed you."

"Attractive, maybe," you shot back. "But charm? That's a stretch."

"If only you were as nice as you are an asshole," You rolled your eyes.

Soobin laughed, the sound rich and unapologetically self-assured. "Nice guys finish last, don't they?" he retorted, a smirk playing on his lips.

You crossed your arms, meeting his gaze head-on. "We'll see if arrogance gets you anywhere."

He shrugged, unbothered by your challenge. "It got me this far. Why change a winning strategy?"

"Winning?" you scoffed. "The game hasn't even started."

Soobin’s eyes sparkled with mischief. "Then consider tonight the first round. I'll pick you up at seven."

"Still assuming I’m free?" you countered, trying to maintain your composure.

"Aren't you?" Soobin's confidence faltered for a split second, a shadow of doubt crossing his face. There it was. Though, Soobin, was trying his best to look like a go-getter, the most confident man alive, he felt like he was still just a shy little boy in front of his crush.

"Actually," you said, your tone softening slightly, "I might be."

He looked at you, a bit more serious now. "Look, if you're not interested, just say so. I can handle it."

"I didn't say anything. I was just waiting for an apology. Y'know from the time you lied to your friend? Calling me pretentious? Ugly?"

"I never used the word ugly."

You raised an eyebrow. "That's what you’re focusing on? Really?"

Soobin sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Okay, I admit it. I might have said some things that weren't exactly fair. It was on impulse. You do stupid shit when you like someone. I'm stupid. I'm an idiot. I don't...I've never liked someone before or asked someone out. Cut me some slack." You see his confidence being brought down by a peg every second he further explains himself. “I’m sorry.”

You chuckled, "Gosh, you really do like me, huh?"

"Fuck off. You're just as pompous as I am."

"It's a part of the charm, isn't it?"

“Sure,” Soobin said, a hint of a smile playing on his lips, “so, are we good now?”

You nodded, the warmth in his eyes melting the last of your anger. “Yeah, we’re good.”

He let out a breath he seemed to have been holding, seeming much more serious than he had been just a minute ago. “Good. Look despite, all the jokes I'm cracking, despite, how much of an asshole I've been, I actually really like you. I don’t want to lose you. Not as a friend, and not as something more."

Your heart fluttered at his words. “Something more, huh? We’ll see about that.”

Soobin grinned, the mischievous spark you were used to back in his eyes. “I’ll take that as a challenge.”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t suppress your smile. “Okay, Mr. Talks-too-loud. Let’s finish up here and see if you can impress me over dinner.”

“Challenge accepted.”

#txt x reader #txt fic #soobin x reader #txt oneshot #txt imagines #txt fluff #txt fanfic

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thedevilrisen · 1 year ago

Text

Prompt Celly - Day Three

Trevor Zegras x Y/N

Description: "Is now a bad time to tell you I'm claustrophobic?" ... "god, here -hold my hand"

A/N: I hope you enjoy! Would be greatly appreciated if you could reblog. I love talking to people so say 'Hi' if you want to. Feel Free to send in requests as well. I'm happy to write for most hockey players.

Warnings: None, I don't think! It should be all fluff and a bit of friendly banter.

-Sincerely thedevilrisen.

"I wasn't being mean-"

"MEAN! TREVOR, you put slime on Jamie's head to wake him up! What part about that isn't mean."

"I-well." he stuttered, smiling.

"How would you feel if I put slime in your hair huh! How 'bout it?" I said smugly, pushing open the door to the apartment block's lobby, sighing at the warmth and holding open the door for my boyfriend of close to 3 years now. We met shortly after he moved to California to play hockey.

Shucking off my waterproof jacket with a sound similar to two pieces sandpaper grinding against each other I draped it over my arm as Trevor walked through the open door behind me, waiting politely so I could straighten out my t-shirt.

Looking up and smiling at him, I offered him my upturned palm which he playfully grabbed and swung around as he pulled me closer so I stood comfortably under his arm.

"All good?" he asked looking down on my small frame.

"All good!" I repeated stretching the 'l' sound in all enthusiastically.

"Ok then, c'mon let's get upstairs I'm starving." he dragged as we started walking toward the elevators.

"What are you going to about that then?" I smiled, nudging his shoulder playfully.

"I'm hoping my beautiful girlfriend will cook me something delicious." He spoke cheekily looking down at me as we approached the lift panel. Pressing the up button and waiting for the lift to come.

The elevator on the left chimed and the doors rolled open smoothly. We walked in onto carpeted floor, I scanned to tag and pressed the button for the 10th floor listening to the methodical beeps and watching the numbers change.

Until with a jolt, the lift stop suddenly and the all the lights but the ones illuminating the buttons cut.

"Trevor. What happened." I tried to ask without a waver in my voice.

"I think the lift just broke." He mumbled, pulling up the flashlight on his phone and clicking the open door button to no avail. "That doesn't work." He spoke quietly to himself walking to the doors, pocketing his phone and trying to pry open the door with his finger. Grunting softly from exertion he turned back to me and look at my tear filled eyes in the dim light emitted from the panel of numbers.

"Is now a bad time to tell you I'm claustrophobic." I whispered, voice wavering significantly more than I wanted it to.

"I-maybe." He spoke quickly, seeing the water in my eyes start to trickle down my cheek, "god, here- hold my hand." he offered said hand to me and with both of mine gripped onto it for dear life.

"It's all good sweetheart. I'll call Jamie and he can come get us out." He spoke gently. To terrified to speak I just nodded, still gripping his left hand. He pulled out his phone from his pocket and opened opened his contacts, hitting Jamie's name and putting it up to his ear.

"Hey Mate, uhm." with a jolt, and a squeal from me, the lift fired back up and continued its journey up to our floor. "Oh, uh never mind. Can I call you back.. thanks, alright talk later bud."

When the doors opened I tore out of the lift and down the hallway to out apartment, fishing the keys out of my pocket I jammed them into the lock.

Slamming the door open I threw my coat off, kicked off my shoes and moved quickly to the living room sofa where my weighted animal was. With a vice grip on the stuffy and a few deep breaths I locked eyes with a concerned looking Trevor and deadpanned.

"We are taking the stairs from now on."

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last-words-ofashootingstar · 2 years ago

Text

Tease

Park Seonghwa x fem reader

a/n: yikes i went overboard- this was originally supposed to be a small drabble but the hwa brain rot is so real. i saw this photo and I STARTED THINKIN THOUGHTS I HAD TO GET THEM OUT-

You decided to tease your boyfriend, but you soon find out that what goes around always comes back around.

✫彡wordcount: 2.5k

(>ᴗ•)genre:

smut, p w/o plot, fluff sprinkles

ಠ_ಠwarnings/contents:

soft dom+teasing seonghwa, established relationship, implications of nudes, use of sex toys, edging/orgasm control, cunnilingus, begging(lots tbh), praise, dacryphilia, unprotected penetration(wrap it up yall), lots of pet names, hair pulling, light name calling, profanity, scratching, one(1) chomp, big dick hwa, belly bulge, cream pie, and forehead touches(obv) and i think that's it ... i told you i went overboard ..damn this is wild 😭

SMUT UNDER THE CUT MDNI

"You wanted my attention all day, Sweetie. Why are you crying now? You've got what you wanted..." Seonghwa looks down at you with his eyes glazed over in lust, resting his elbows on his knees and leaning down to where you sit on the floor in front of the couch. Your legs spread, face warm and wet with tears, cute pantie set pushed to the side to give him a good view of your wet hole clenching the toy. "You've got all my attention, sweet girl."

"Please-"

"Nuh-uh." He cuts you off, cupping your face with a soft smile that hardly matches his next words, "you take it. This is what you get." You adjust yourself on the floor to sit on your knees, and he watches you with a hint of amusement.

You brace yourself on his thighs, gripping the fabric of his sweats. "Please, Mars... Touch me. God- please give me more. I need to cum. I'm s- I'm sorry!" You sob, leaning your head onto his lap. You feel his hand gently pat down your undoubtedly messy hair, then you hear him chuckle.

"You're always sorry until I let you cum, huh?"

"No, I'm really sor-"

"Teasing little slut," he groans, tenderly tugging your hair by the roots to pull your head up. You've left a stain of tears just above his knee. "Tell me," he begins, "do you think I enjoyed a hard on during practice? You think I got to cum after you teased me with those pictures?"

"No," you admit, tears slowing. He notices, and reaches to his phone, abruptly turning the device from six to twelve. They return full force, your legs clench themselves together and you cling onto Seonghwa for dear life as moans rip through you. "I'm sorry, Hwa! Please, please, it's too much," you croak out.

"Too much?" He coos with a smirk. "I thought you wanted to cum, Princess?" Your eyes widen at the implication of his words, and he only smiles back down at you. "Get back down there and maybe I'll let you."

You all but fall back into the shag rug of your apartment, hiccuping as your tears free fall. "Please, I'mma be good, Baby. I promise, I pinky swear, with a fucking cherry on top!" You almost forget to spread you legs, when his foot knocks down one of you knees and reminds you. You expose yourself to him as you revel in the feeling of the intense vibrations inside you.

It's never enough to make you cum, though. And Seonghwa knows that. That's why he's looking down with a smirk.

"Can't see you, Sweetie." His voice alone makes you cry out in a moan, writhing as you try to get any friction on your clit with the lace panties you used to tease him. "Take them off." Your tears blur your vision as you blink open your eyes, staring up at the ceiling as you hook your fingers under the fabric. You follow his instruction, pulling them down as quickly as you can and leaving them discarded to an unknown corner of the room.

"There's my good girl," he all but moans as he slinks to the floor in front of you. "Where've you been all day, Angel? I've been stuck-" he runs his hand over your calve, making you twitch- he laughs heartily. "I've been stuck with an attention whore all day."

Unbeknownst to you, his smirk only grows as he comes closer and sees the fat tears that still run down the sides of your face. "I'm so-" you cry out as his hands find purchase on your hips, holding them in place. "I'm so sorry, Hwa! I'll never tease you again, I swear! I'm gonna be good! I'm your good girl, I promise!"

He hums, pushing you back so he can lay flat on his tummy. "I know you are, I know. We all have our days. Isn't that right, Princess? You were just extra needy today, huh?" His thumb ghosts over your swollen clit, and you begin mumbling incoherent pleas and apologies: gripping onto the carpet like it owes you money.

"Isn't that right?" he asks again, reaching one of his hands up to grip your hand and ground you.

"Yes," you moan, "just need you so bad."

"You've got me," he attaches his lips to your core with no warning, and both of your hands wrap up in his blond locks.

"God, fuck!" His tongue assaults your begging cunt, swiping up and down and side to side and messaging you in tight circles. "Oh my God, my God, Mars Baby, so good! You're so good! Please, don't stop," you begin to hyperventilate, and it doesn't slip his attention as he hears it in your tight voice.

He moves one of his hands away from its death grip on your hip and trails it to rest softly between your ribs, tracing the same patterns he makes with his tongue with his index finger. Similar to him, one of your hands lets up on the clutch you have on his head and traps his wrist in it, feeling the small flexes as he traces on your body.

When he begins backing his head away as you start to reach your peak, you try fruitlessly to push him back. The vibration increases ten fold. He put it all the way to twenty. Your hips buck in his hold, head thrown to the side and back arched off the floor.

"Angel, hey..." he speaks gently, leaning over you and smiling as he wipes your hot face. "You ready to cum for me?"

"Yeah," you manage to mumble, kissing his wrist before he pulls it away and wraps both his hands around your thighs. He watches as you wait patiently for a moment, bracing yourself for his tongue. "Hwa?" You prop yourself up after a long moment. "Baby, please?"

He hums, looking up as if he's deep in thought. "I don't know... Are you sure?"

"Fuck!" You pound your hands on the floor, surely pissing off the downstairs neighbor (who is the extremely unfortunate Choi San).

He laughs, thumbs digging into your hips as he gives you a kitten lick that makes tremors rack your body. "You sure?"

"Yes! Yes, please! I want to fucking cum for you, Mars! I want to fucking cum, please help me, I need it so badly," you can barely keep eye contact with him as he rolls his tongue out. "Please, stop teasing me," you whisper though your sobs, giving him your best pleading eyes.

"How can I resist that?"

He sucks roughly on your weeping cunt, rolling his tongue over your nerves as he does so. You come undone in no time at all, so wound up from his teasing that the pleasure spills over inside you and you're seeing stars in your vision. You freeze up as you're dunked into an overwhelming climax. He doesn't let up until you seem to come back into your own body, slumping to the floor and searching him out with a wandering hand.

He sits up quickly and pulls you up into his lap even quicker, wrapping his arms around you tightly- somehow finding time to turn the vibrator off in between. You lean into his warmth, moaning into his shoulder, "fuck." You're so out of it that you don't notice you're sitting over his hard cock. "Fucking love you."

"I love you," he places a chaste kiss to your temple. "My precious Angel. You did so well." His gentle fingers find your overworked cunt, and you jump at the feeling. He holds back a chuckle at the moan you let out when he finally takes the toy out with a lewd pop. He tosses it half harzardly near the wet spot left on the carpet by the mixture of his saliva and your wetness- making a mental note to break out the carpet cleaner.

"Sweet Angel," he rasps as he leaves an open mouthed kiss on your sweaty neck. "Love of my life." He tugs you away from your near-sleep with a deep kiss to your lips. It's wakes you up, his tongue quickly finding its place in your mouth. You wrap yours up in it, entangling you together as he pumps his cock in the small gap between the two of you.

"You need more time, Princess?" You shake your head, steadying yourself with a hand on his shoulder as you take him in the other.

He can barely hold himself back as he hears you begging so quietly, he nearly misses it. "Want you to fill me up."

"Fuck," he groans, "keep talking like and I'll loose my mind." He holds back a moan with his finger between his teeth as you sink down on him. You settle ontop of him, flattening your chest against his and resting your forehead against his. "Want you to fuck me full, Mars." You say proudly, "want you to cum inside me. Want it so bad."

"Too good to me, Sweetie." He rests his arms over your shoulders and glances down to where you're connected.

"Can I move now?" You ask with a quick smile and a kiss to the side of his lips. He nods, pushing his head impossibly closer to yours as his eyes screw up in pleasure.

"God," he gasps, savoring the way your walls slowly envelop him. His throat bobs as you kiss behind his ear, holding himself back to let you have your little moment of dominance. "My good girl, my Angel. Take me so good." His words appeal to the sub he knows you are, your hips stuttering.

The slapping of your skin together echoes in the room, fueling both of your insatiable hunger for one another. "So big," you whine as you work your hips. You finally lean away from him to get better leverage, rolling your hips. "Gah-" You moan as he presses on of his hands to your back, the other just above your cunt. "No, I can't take it! Don't fucking do it, Hwa."

He swipes his tongue over his top lip, looking up at you with a shockingly wholesome smile. "Don't you wanna feel me, Princess? I wanna feel..." You can't deny the way it drives you crazy when he presses down on the outline of his cock inside you. Your just afraid you might loose your mind after how he made you cum earlier. "You think you can handle it?" His hand leaves the imprint and wonders to you breast, pinching your nipple and making your hips halt as you lean into his touch. "Ah~" he moans, "my Love is so sensitive."

He takes back the dominance in a second flat (as if he ever let it slip away). He wraps his arms around your waist and begins pounding into you, relishing in the way he can see his cocks outline just above your pussy before it's hidden by your belly fat. "That's it, Sweetheart. Just like that..." Your walls flutter around him, earning a low moan.

Wordlessly, you remove one of your hands form their tight grasp on the straps of his tank top and toward your stomach.

"Can you take that? You sure, Precious?"

"Yeah," you brokenly whimper that you, "wanna feel it. Wanna feel you." You both whine as you put pressure down, and his hips falter ever so slightly. Tears are building up in your eyes for the umpteenth time tonight, and he leans off the back of the couch to kiss your cheeks as they fall, treasuring the saltiness.

You let your legs fall from the upright position, and he wraps them around him, pulling you all the closer as he fucks into you, and you feel it even more as he keeps a hand on your lower stomach. "Mars-"

"Hold it." He knows by now that you're about to cum, and he's still technically punishing you. "Don't cum yet, don't do it."

You prop your head over his shoulder, wrapping your hands up in the back of his hair. The harder it gets, the harder you clench, and it only builds you up faster. "Baby, please..." You cry, tugging his hair.

"Hold it, Sweetie. You can do it. If you cum, I'm not letting you catch your breath."

"Feels too good!" Your hands rake down his back, leaving angry red lines in your wake. "I can't-"

"You can," he hisses as you mark up his back, "you can take it, Princess. My Princess can take it. I know you can."

His words give you the will to hold back the pleasure, biting gently into his shoulder to hold back your loud noises. "Good girl. You're there, right? I know you wanna cum so bad, huh?"

"Please, can I?" You sniffle, pushing back off his shoulders to face him, brain foggy and excited at the words that leave his lips. You trail your arms down his arms, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind. "God," you start moving your hips with his the moment you see him. His own tears are welling up, face flushed, lips swollen from physically biting back his moans. "My pretty boy, you-Fuck!" He slams up into you, moaning openly as you praise him. "Mars Baby, you fuck me so good! Take such good care of me," you cradle his hot face in your shaking hands, struggling to hold your orgasm back and still function.

"I'm going to fucking fill you up, Angel." He's already more than halfway to that promise, watching as you stare down at him, keeping your hands on his face so lovingly as he pounds you mercilessly. "Want you to cum with me. Want you to cream on my cock."

You nod, managing to hold back most of your yells as he ups the force: holding you from bouncing with one hand on your hip and the other on your shoulder. "Please, Hwa... fuck me full. Wanna be full of you."

His hand slips down from your hip and to your abused clit, and you can't hold back as you cum- forcing yourself to keep your eyes on him as they threaten to roll back. He pulls your head to his and moans loudly into your lips, continuing to thrust as his warm seed fills you up.

He pulls back as darkness starts to cloud your vision, sweet praises followed by the shallow, heavy breaths of the both of you. You shiver in his hold, tears soaking the fabric of the couch that you now have your face smushed against.

"God," he whines, hands rubbing up and down your back soothingly. "My little fucking tease."

#park seonghwa #ateez seonghwa #seonghwa smut #ateez fic #ateez #smut fic #ateez smut #fanfic

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parismemes · 6 months ago

Text

SENTENCE STARTERS FROM EPIC: THE MUSICAL - THE CIRCE SAGA

feel free to change/adjust sentences as needed !

PUPPETEER

"i have something that i must confess." "there's only so much left we can endure." "whatever you need to say can wait some more." "back so soon?" "by the gods, what happened to you?" "we are weak to a power like this." "what was it?" "come inside." "welcome to the best part of your life." "go ahead and rest wherever you like." "let me bring you something to eat." "i've got all the power." "i'm not a player, i'm a puppeteer." "this is the price we pay to live." "the world does not tend to forgive." "we have to go save them." "look at all we've lost and all we've learned." "let's just cut our losses, you and i, and let's run." "i can hardly sleep now knowing everything we've done." "what if she can't be killed?" "this is the price we pay to love." "i have to try."

WOULDN'T YOU LIKE

"i must say, what a brilliant speech you gave." "who goes there?" "wouldn't you like a taste of the power?" "wouldn't you like to use more than words?" "i'll help you conquer her." "all you need's imagination." "don't thank me, friend, you very well may die." "good luck!"

DONE FOR

"i hope that i've been misinformed." "did you do something to them?" "i've got people to protect." "i'm not taking chances, dear." "if you make one wrong move, then you're done for." "you must be a liar." "you and i are now evenly matched." "now there is no turning back." "you've lost." "you've given me no reason to bestow you with my trust." "everyone's true colors are revealed in acts of lust."

THERE ARE OTHER WAYS

"there are other ways of persuasion." "there are other means of deceit." "there are other roads to the soul." "you have so much left to learn." "show me that you're willing to burn." "who's to say with the mistakes i've made that they will be the last mistakes i'll ever make?" "don't be afraid." "i'm just a man." "there might be a way to evade him." "wait, you're helping us?" "maybe showing one act of kindness leads to kinder souls down the road." "i have been in love once before." "maybe one day the world will need a puppeteer no more."

#rp meme #rp memes #rp prompt #rp prompts #ask meme #ask memes #inbox meme #sentence starters

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invidiia · 2 years ago

Note

oh my god the yan!dazai x willing reader fic😭 i love reading this type of content (its a trauma response but the idea of someone obsessing over me brings me comfort </3)

Can you write something more for yan!dazai and reader? Like dazai somehow forgets his keys at home giving reader full access to run away/call for help, but when he comes back running to his apartment worried he sees them cooking something for him and what surprises him the most is the fact that he didn’t have most of the ingredients which means that they went outside to buy them and actually came back <3

❐ - yandere osamu dazai (bsd) with a reader who to left the house to make dinner.

note ; HII thank you for requesting!! and the beginning of the request really made me think, and i realized you were completely right and i relate deeply !! on another topic besides the request, i feel bad about writing ever since character ai came about, because what's the point of writing fics and hcs for people who can just make everything they want happen with ai?! but i'll continue, of course!! alsoo ada dazai

prompt ; dazai's beloved cooks for him after he left for the store.

warning ; kidnapping, possibly soft!yandere dazai AT FIRST, mentioned suicide (it's dazai)

masterlist - rules - previous work

when dazai finally trusts you enough to be by yourself while he went out to run errands, it was like you felt relief for the first time in years. maybe it was.

he didn't specify what he was doing, but he did seem like he would be out for a long time. but for whatever reason in the world, you didn't exactly plan to fully escape from him. maybe you were on something, because anybody else would have went as far as they could.

dazai kissed the top of your top of your head affectionately. "my dear," he addressed to you, his voice sweet, just like every other time he spoke. "i have to run errands, okay? can you promise me that you'll be good while i'm gone?" dazai rested his head on top of yours, holding you closely to his chest in a tight hug. you nodded your head against him, and he smiled. "i'll be off now, my love." and with that, dazai walked out the door, completely forgetting his keys on the table.

maybe you were drugged, high or some kind of intoxicated, because anyone would be overjoyed to see that their kidnapper left their keys with them, and they'd try to leave! i mean, dazai was normally cautious - how stupid of him this evening.

but for just some reason, any reason in the world, you didn't leave the house for freedom. instead it was for.. groceries? dazai did feed you often, but it was usually food from a local place that he liked a lot more than cooking, hence the reason there were barely any ingredients to make dinner with.

maybe you were doing this to gain trust and then turn your back on him later? well, it was too late, dazai left the keys here, and you were free to escape. so the first place you decided to go? the grocery store.

walking through the produce isle, you turned your head anxiously, looking behind your back to see if dazai found out you left and followed you. but no one was there, not at all. you were safe.

you gathered up money from inside your pockets when the man first took you - enough to buy a couple vegetables, a bag of rice, and a bit of chicken. that was enough for tonight!

upon your return to the apartment, nobody was there, so you got to work, having not been caught by dazai on your little outing to the store.

it was pretty easy to make fried rice. you found yourself in the kitchen chopping vegetables to put into the frying pan while you seasoned the chicken. dazai didn't have a ton of seasoning in his cabinets.. guess this guy liked his stuff plain? but you worked with what you had, and you were able to make a pretty damn good plate of chicken fried rice. the meal was perfect, and you had just finished when the door opened up. it was dazai. the brunette man opened up the door rather quickly, slipping inside the apartment. "belladonna.. this smells amazing!"

dazai was quick to praise your cooking, even telling you that he didn't want to eat your masterpiece in hopes of ruining it, but you told him to sit down and just eat it.

and that he did, and he loved it! he didn't act like anything was wrong, it went perfect! he praised your cooking skills the entire time while he ate.

even you forgot that you snuck out to retrieve your ingredients!

"belladonna," dazai spoke, sweetly. you were both nearing the end of the meal, with just two bites of the food left on the plate. "your cooking is absolutely perfect, you know that? i almost forgot that we didn't have any vegetables in the house." you tensed up. this was such a stupid idea, sneaking out to get ingredients for your meal. "i found those in the cabinet, you brought them home one night. don't you remember?" you lied nervously, biting up the inside of your mouth while you just silently begged he would believe you. "i would never think about willingly buying bell peppers unless i planned to cook such a meal. why would you leave the apartment, dear?" dazai slid his chair back, stepping towards you with his hands in his pockets. this was stupid, a stupid mistake that you can't undo. "no matter.. you didn't run away.. so what am i to do with you?" he grabbed a lock of your hair, pulling it upwards so you could face him. you cried out, whimpering in pain - but he paid no attention to it, looking you in the eye. "let's see."

#klya..requests #yandere dazai x reader #yandere dazai #tw yandere #yandere dazai osamu #yandere bsd x reader #yandere bsd #bsd x reader #yandere osamu dazai #yandere osamu dazai x reader

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coffee-and-guitar-strings · 9 months ago

Text

Studying with ADHD

Dear God. My activity on here is sporadic, as is fitting with my diagnosis, but I thought maybe this post could help anyone that's been struggling alongside me.

Warning: Long Post

Feel Free to browse the bullet points and stop if something catches your eye!

If you don't like any of these, don't use them! They're based solely off my experience, and everyone experiences ADHD differently <3

Content:

Setting up The Space

Study Snacks!! - No hunger in The Space

Compete with yourself

Ignore Pomodoro

Reverse the feeling of 'not being smart enough'

Active Recall

Unriddle.ai (not sponsored,,,)

Final Tip

Final Note

Here ya go:

1. Setting up The Space

Some sites say to create a 'distraction free zone' to study in. Screw that, it never worked for me.

My brain is the distraction. I'll stare off into space if there's no other option.

INSTEAD:

We set up a study space that both fulfils random urges mid-work session, and limits distractions away from the desk.

I.e. we don't get up until we need the bathroom.

You limit the amount you get up from The Space, you limit the number of things your attention span will switch to.

Snacks, fidgets, drawing, separate screen for watching stuff? Whatever works, stick it on the desk.

Food wise, I try to make a healthy lunch and then eat it at my desk while reviewing stuff, but sometimes I need a longer break.

If I am taking a break, I do it away from The Space. The Space is dead to me now.

Try to compartmentalise your area, work only in these spots, relax only in these, sleep only there.

We're trying to train our brains here, people, simple and clear relations of space to activity typically get embedded easier.

Also: work whenever.

Burst of energy at 9pm? Go for it, we sleep badly anyways.

Middle of lunch? Have a flashcard/ notes app on your phone, do it while you eat.

With friends? See method 5 <3

I'll link a separate post I'll be making on exactly how my space is set up, though most of the key points are in this one :)

2. Study Snacks!! - No hunger in The Space

One. Handed. Food. Only.

Also, food that doesn't get stuff on your fingers.

You can't work if you're constantly wiping your hands to keep going, and you need something you can absentmindedly grab while you keep your eyes trained on the work.

I recommend getting artificial sugar in your system, sweets, chocolate, give yourself a mild sugar rush to keep a bit of a buzz going while you work.

(try to be healthy about it, this won't be sustainable long-term, but I find a shot of sugar to the system can help prevent burnout)

Also caffeine! Please be aware of how much caffeine you're having for health reasons - I need to watch how much I have, since my medication is already bad for my heart, but even just having a coffee and some sugar at the start of the session, I get enough energy to start working

As long as I don't stop until I'm Done, I will be good.

3. Compete with yourself

I don't recommend competing with others, it toes the line of 'feeling like a failure' too much for my liking, but if it works for you, go for it.

Instead, I compete with myself. Mostly quizlet flashcards, but also 'how much of this have I remembered from yesterday?', and 'How much more can I remember today?'

Whether it's personality or hyperactivity, this gives a dopamine hit. Finding ways to make studying something you can score against is one of my favourite methods.

Video games are an ADHD staple for a reason, easily trackable progress and dopamine from rewards/hyperfixations/etc. make them addictive.

Turn the work into a video game (I think at this point I may sound insane to you guys but please trust me)

4. Ignore Pomodoro

ADHD students, we have to think like sharks: we stop, we die.

Once you have found yourself studying with (relative) ease, Do. Not. Stop. You keep that going as long as possible.

ADHD doesn't mean you can't focus, you can, you just have no choice in where that attention gets allocated. So, when a tomato-based timer tell you to turn off your focus and relax, after it took you half the damn time to start the stupid work, it can be a little counter-productive

(I may have some repressed rage for pomodoro, try to forgive me)

Please, ignore the pomodoro stuff. I know it's healthy to regulate the volume of work you do, but I find that once I start working, I can't stop until I run out of energy.

I time or video myself instead, I can track how long I've been working, feel proud of it, and I also can't use my phone during that session.

When my brain stops taking stuff in, I have an hour to 2 hour break, relax (away from The Space) try to reset my brain so it's back to baseline. Then I start again.

5. Reverse the feeling of 'not being smart enough'

I know I am smart, and it's on others if they don't see that, but having undiagnosed ADHD for 17 years did a number on my self image and confidence.

If you struggle with this, it's so, so helpful to try this method, and can start to reverse the negative internal image we've managed to cultivate <3

So, after you've covered a topic: tell someone about it (please make sure they're ready to listen to you rant for half an hour).

Not only are you reinforcing what you've just learnt, but you also get to feel competent, and teaching someone else about your topic helps to raise perceptions (internal or from others) of what you know/what you're capable of.

6. Active Recall

This one goes great with the whole, 'competing with yourself' method (no. 4);

Active Recall is just making sure you're going over old information and recalling correctly, once it's past short term memory. Trying to remember information without it present forces your brain to pull it from Long-term memory and reinforces the information in your brain.

I know it's been said a million times, but this + competing with yourself does wonders for me.

My favourite method is blurting ( read/write notes of one topic, wait ten minutes, do something else productive, and then try to copy that topic from memory. repeat until all key info is correctly recalled)

7. Unriddle.ai (not sponsored,,,)

Okay, this site changed it for me. 5 free uploads, 15 free inputs per month.

Download a copy of the fancy scientific paper/article/book you need to read through. Upload.

Ask unriddle to summarise key points, to re-write it as if you were 7, etc.

This genuinely saved my essays. Suddenly the procrastination of reading my source material was gone. It makes it so much easier to get through dense/boring text and then I wrote everything myself.

Please do not plagiarise, I am only recommending this site to make things easier to read, copying down what it produces is considered plagiarism by my uni, and likely most others.

8. Final Tip

Be kind to yourself.

When I got medicated, my friends were genuinely stressed by how much work I was suddenly doing.

One of them asked me about it, and I realised it didn't feel like I was doing any more than normal. I had always been working this hard, it was just that half the energy going in wasn't being wasted on trying to get myself to focus.

What you put in may not receive the same results as for others, but the reality is that you're likely working harder than they are. The irritating truth is simply that we have to compensate for the different cognitive functioning that neurotypicals get to take for granted

(no hate to the NTs, I'm glad ya'll don't have to think about it, but for someone with ADHD, it can be really tough to realise)

A Final Note:

You are smart. You can do this. We just need to modify the system a little to make it work for us. There is no shame in that, anyone telling you otherwise needs a reality check.

Genuinely though, I've noticed that people telling me I use my ADHD accommodations (required by law) as a 'crutch'.

1. If the world were set up by me, that same person would struggle just as much, if not more.

2. If Rishi Sunak's government is willing to GIVE ME FREE MONEY to access these accommodations, that implies that this genuinely is needed. Not because I think Sunak is intelligent or kind (my own political opinions, please just hear me out), but because there is no way, with the underfunding of the NHS, Public services, etc. that they'd be willing to give me money I don't need to repay if it wasn't a scientific fact that I needed it, and it helped.

Use the inadequacies of the government to your advantage in arguments, make the idiots see how integral our accommodations are. I'd have dropped out of uni by now without them.

For anyone in need of help trying to convince family/friends/teachers/etc. of the struggle with ADHD (or anything else, though I won't have as much experience with it), telling them what you need help with, or any other arguments, send me an ask. I do psychology for my degree, I am used to searching for research papers, and I will help you with the necessary scientific backing for your case.

You are not in this alone <3

Lots of Love!

Coffee + Guitar Strings

@chocolatelandgarden @chaoticstudyprincess

#studyblr #adhd #actually adhd #university #adhd problems #adhd studyblr #adhd study tips #adhd student #study tips #study blog #studying

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sotogalmo · 25 days ago

Text

10:34

I have finally finished Sebastian's song, and it only took me 2 drafts!

(just tagging @solei-eclipse , @ivanttakethis , @tsukacchako , @starry-skiez , @friedclownshrimp , @astoryofsuchwoe , + more but I doubt they want anything to deal with me now)

Transcript below;

(A bit of a guitar riff, +techno buzz? Quite similar instrumental by Castillerian for The Spider and The Kitsune Like Lion by MASA WORKS DESIGN)

~similiar intro vocals like Flor did (laughing, “ohs”<- but they are actually now “ahs”, and a light grunt but that grunt is more rougher then Flor’s was)

“(ah- leading to a growl) Come on! Come on!

A slight fever, In this one way street, every ending- has a feast. Sewing a broken look, surviving unknowingly—

Being used as a shield without knowing, but-

A trip, <- this is what they said

Don't give up! Do it, do it! keep up (Keep Up!).

This is the best that it'll ever be! Cuz it's all I'll ever get.

To be all of me, set inside-

Walking to my destiny—

Pardon me, this is the worst moment

~heavy yet soft sounding metal banks, start to play

Hold on tight, even if you will never see as an equal

I want this to go,

Don't have me, don't have me, melting in your soul

Ah, Now

The future stays dark, it's like trying to love poison

(DON’T DARE!)

Waiting. Existing out of spite; wishing

This is the best that it'll ever be; cuz it's all I'll ever get.

To be all of me, set inside-

Walking to my destiny—

~softer heavy melody (calm and wishy-washy) for this small part

Moonlight inside a tiny bottle

Oh this snow- the sky, the sea, the light I see

The noise, the crowd. Welcoming “me” on

Ultimate, something. All to all,

None to me. Moonlight inside a tiny bottle (and then meeting his eyes I've—)

~the main instrumental comes back

This is the best that it'll ever be! Cuz it's all I'll ever get.

To be all of me, set inside-

Walking to my destiny—

Hold on tight, for dear Life (where is “beyond the society”?)

Capture you or set you free

Oh (no) this snow- (no) the sky, (no) the sea, (no) the light I see

harmony stained with consequences

maybe then we will all learn our lesson (oh)

~iconic part of Fukouna Girl by STOMACH BOOK tempo plays

This is the best that it'll ever be! Cuz it's all I'll ever get.

To be all of me, set inside-

Walking in my misery—

Pardon me, this is the worst moment!

~Singer (Sebastian, looks frantic around himself as he goes all out on the instrumental. Practically screaming at the end of the song, with these last lyrics that don't seem to make any sense)

Outro↓

Stop and Shut Up!

Pardon me, this is the worst moment!

The future stays dark, it's trying to poison

He can't have anything!

Ah! Crack, GOD NO! (DON’T DARE!)

Hey! This won't play- this spinning, spinny way that my feet are chained

Stop and SHUT UP!

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ch4osworld · 10 months ago

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THE PASSENGER

Chapter 4

Word count:1124 @cherry-4200 @adaizel

Yeaaaah finally chapter 4! I hope you'd like this one. I actually managed to put more effort into it so yeah

"Ehy bitch!" Lucifer exclaimed, a nervous look clearly evident on his face. A few seconds have passed as she was announcing whatever she had to announce to him, in an instant his face contorted from an anxious one to a happy one "YOU ARE INVINTING ME TO SEE YOU. YES I'LL SEE YA THERE BYE I LOVE YOU" he ended the call, as he stared at you , eyes shining with excitement "MY DAUGHTER INVITED ME TO SEE HER Y/N! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!" He burst, going out of the pool and getting dressed "Yes, Luci, I heard you while you were on call you know?" You answered, following him outside "Do you want to come too? It's been a while since you saw her in person too, i am sure she'll be happy to see you" "No thank you, it would be good for you two to have some farther-daughter moment alone. I am fine just in here" "Are you sure? Come on you know you want to see her" he coaxed "I couldn't be more positive about it" "Well ok then, i'll see ya later" he finishes, giving you a smirk and kissing your hand as a final goodbye. Oh he was such a tease. You loved him so so much, you desperatly wanted to ask him out, but the ring on his finger was a constant reminder of the things you could have done there in heaven. If only you wouldn't have been so coward, maybe, just maybe, he would be yours now. You walked through the castle, the white of the walls contrasting perfectly with the f/c of your clothes, dirty of blood that you weren't able to wash away, a looming sensation watches over you, a feeling of sorrow drowned you, as you knew something would have happened to you, one day. Not that you could do something about it, but when that moments will come, may the root of all evil have mercy on you.

A finger traced on your arm, as your nail went deep into your flesh, almost scarlet blood flow to your hand. Your blood was a constant reminder of the holyness you were slowly losing the more you lived in this gruesome place. Even being free from the fruit of knowledge of good and evil couldn't save you from slowly corrupting yourself, as sin was spreading all over you. You wondered what would have happened if you decided to accept his offer, what would have happened if you ate the apple.

"Dear, don't you want free will?" "I have already free will, you're a fool if you think I would disobey God like this. What would this make me gain?" "You don't seem like having free will to me, come on, I never saw you doing anything you actually wanted to do" "oh yes you did, many times in fact, the only things I want to do is to submit to God and to obey my husband" "Or is it really? Do you know what this could give you?" "Enlighten me, Lucifer, isn't this what your name means?" "This could give you more than you already have. More sensations, more experiences. You've never felt the lust of the flesh, the feeling of shame, don't you want to be complete? Don't you want to feel whole?" "Such a foolish reason, i don't need lust, i don't need shame, i don't need more experiences" "You are so stubborn, that's what I like about you. I hope one day you'll be able to understand why i am doing this. Now i shall go, my dear, duties are waiting" he said, a kiss planted on your forehead. He was such a moron, that's why you loved him, if God knew what he was trying to make you do, and what he already made you do, oh the things that would happen to him. You wouldn't be able to bear it, no one shall ever know.

You reached the comfort of your bedroom, a single red eye watching over you. You glared back, coldly. You knew too well who that belonged to, you knew you would be her next victim, even so, you didn't dare to say a thing to Lucifer. You cared too much about him, you didn't want him to worry for you too, he had already enough problems. You laid back on your bed, the eye following your every movement as it was studying you, trying to decipher your every secret. A strong feeling of death engulfed you, the more the eye stared at you the more it amplified. After some minutes you got too anguished by it to continue to stay in there, you decided to exit and go into Lucifer's room instead, it wasn't far from yours. As you entered the first thing you noticed where the big piles of rubber ducks, two campturing your eyes. It was you and him, in a little duck version, how cute. You sat on his bed, looking at the photos hung on the walls, it was mostly him and his family, but right in the middle, there was a protrait of you. The first ever of the many there were made. He promised you he would have throw it away because you thought you looked ugly in it, yet he didn't. You remeber that when you shamefully showed it to him his eyes lit up, he said you were perfect. He was so sweet to you, still is. Maybe in a few months you'll be able to confess to him, maybe he loved you too. Yes, you were sure of it, you were going to declare your love to him, possibly before the next exetermination. As you were thinking about what you would do, you felt Lucifer coming to his room, he was back already? You managed to get out just in time, before seeing him with a worries expression on his face "Luci? What happened? Did something go wrong?" "It's just that, my daughter is going to go on a meeting with heaven and i am just so worried. You know how heaven can be" "Yes, i know, but she is a smart woman, i am sure she'll be able to handle it yeah?" "I guess your right, i hope she'll be fine..." "she will, don't worry" you finishes, inviting him to an embrace. He didn't think twice to ingulf you whole, taking out his wings to seclude you two from no one since you were alone. In that instant all your hollow thoughts were soon forgotten, as all you ever wanted, all you ever needed was here, in your arms. That's just all that matters, for words are unecessary, words can do more harm than there already is.

#hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar x reader #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel x reader #fem!reader #hazbin lucifer #lucifer morningstar #lucifer x reader

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