#dean would not bind safely

[jasprboi]

the one rare moment dean unbinds

[shanastoryteller]

i know supernatural is the show of missed opportunities but man. the trials really get to me - what a perfect way to reboot and reset this show that you're artificially extending for ratings. it could have been really, really good, actually

so the trials of god is a way for someone to gain the ability to seal the gates of hell and the gates of heaven

they have the translation for hell, they know that slamming the gates of hell shut means calling all the demons back home and locking the key. it's logical, then, to for them to believe the same is true of the one for heaven - that it calls all the angels back home and locks them away where they can't do any more damage

peace, for the people of earth, outside of the influence of angels and demons. that's got to be worth it, right?

so while sam is completing the hell trials, they get the angel tablet, kevin gets translating, to figure out the angel trials. or maybe metatron helps nudge them along to figuring it out, since him being the big bad here isn't really relevant and they are in a bit of time crunch

canon doesn't tell us what the heaven trials are, except that the first one involves a ritual using the heart of a nephilim. they make it sound like they're carving it from their chest, but what i would do is

have a nephilim offer you their heart from their chest (gain their loyalty in a binding ceremony)

create grace from freshwater (there is no rain that falls anywhere on earth that is safe to drink and god said let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters)

find a human soul to guide you to heaven (babel fell but the stairway was built and those with wings have no need of stairs)

so sam is in the midst of the hell trials when dean sort of accidentally on purpose completes the first heaven trial and then the brothers are on parallel train tracks heading in the opposite direction

sam works to close the gates of hell

dean works to close the gates of heaven

demons and angels both working to stop them

sam completes the trials. he restores crowley's humanity and he dies and the gates of hell are closed

but that's not the end

metatron says they can close the gates if they're willing to pay the price. canon says the price is sam's death, but frankly that doesn't make any sense. what's the death of one human against the horrors of hell? and remember, metatron doesn't know the winchesters. maybe another angel would make this comment, knowing how the winchesters have weighed the safety of the world against their brother and left the world out to dry, would think this a price worth warning for. but metatron wouldn't bother, wouldn't even think of it, if that was the only price

the gates of hell close and malevolent spirits explode across the globe, evil spirits and angry ghosts causing death and destruction everywhere

hell serves a function and now the gates are closed and every evil human soul is forced to stay on earth, causing as much destruction as it can

that's the price for closing the gates of hell

except. except. aren't the hell trials interesting?

kill a hellhound. rescue an innocent soul and return it to heaven. purify a demon and restore their humanity.

the trials are not to prove if someone is worthy of closing the gates of hell. it's to prove they're capable of setting hell to rights

the trials are if things got too out of hand, if things were taken too far, and hell had to be put back in it's place. sam dies and ends up exactly where azazel wanted him - ruler of hell. all the demons and souls are trapped with him and what he has to do, while he has them all there, while they can't escape, is exactly what he did to get there

he kills the hellhounds, leaving only those meant to patrol hell. he releases every innocent soul bound there. he purifies the demons one by one, who he either releases as innocent souls or who to pledge to do their job as demons of hell - punishing evil, containing evil - in penance for what they did before (how do i even begin to make up for what i've done, crowley had asked, and this is the answer)

meanwhile, dean, heartbroken, completes the heaven trials and dies

and the gates of heaven slam shut and all the angels are stripped of their grace and expelled from heaven and dean finds himself in charge of an empty heaven

the trials are for when things have gone too far and heaven must be rebuilt, after all

good souls pile up, no one who dies able to truly leave earth, and given enough time they become twisted things that must be hunted along with the spirits of evil men and women who cause chaos from their last breath

dean has work to do. he has one angel - the nephilim whose loyalty he earned in the first trial - and this is what he has to do. he recruits more, to replace the ranks, he creates grace and hands it out judiciously. he sends them to guide the good souls home, using the stairway that the former angels wouldn't be able to use even if they wanted to, and each good act and deed earns them a little more grace. former angels throw themselves into the fight for humans, because they know it's the only way that dean will return their grace to them and lift them back into heaven

and in fighting for them, in living like them, they learn to love these creations of their father that they'd despised. they see what he saw and the thought of destroying this place in a civil war becomes unthinkable to them. they are once more the angels god intended them to be

in this, dean and sam fulfill their destiny as lucifer and michael's vessels. not in letting them in, but in pushing them out, in doing the work each was intended for but refused

only when there is only evil human souls being punished and caged, only once the demons are once more working to run hell and earn their release to heaven, does sam reopen the gates of hell

only when there's a full choir of angels once more, committed to their cause, only once there are souls working with reapers as it once always was, does dean reopen the gates of heaven

they're called the god trials for a reason. above and below, sam and dean act as god, putting things back in their intended places

they could stay. they should stay. keeping house, making sure it all goes smoothly, eternally keeping earth safe from angels and demons both

they're called the god trials for a reason. not even god could resist the paradise inbetween that he'd created

dean doesn't know if sam is going to return to earth. he might stay in hell, and if dean becomes human once more, then what's the point? he'll live and die a human, get stuck in heaven, and be forever separated from the brother he loves

sam doesn't know if dean is going to return to earth. he migh not be able to, might be stuck doing his work - sam assumes if the hell trials did this to him, then the heaven trials did the same to dean, and the idea that dean could have failed the heaven trials after he dies doesn't even cross mind. if he returns and dean's not there then he loses it all, he never again gets to see the brother he loves

but when, exactly, haven't they been willing to risk everything for each other?

dean falls as lucifer fell, throwing himself towards earth

sam rises as michael did after the fall, pulling himself towards earth the same way michael once pulled himself to the top of heaven

what's the use of being a god without his brother, after all?

dean and sam are reunited on earth, human once more

no more angels, no more demons, heaven and hell functioning once more as they should. we're back to basics, a clean slate, all of the rest remade and set aside by their own hands (it's literal and a metaphor, the way the show could have remade itself with the trials, after setting aside kripke's plan while at the same time recognizing that the design of it - two brothers who love each other going across america and fighting evil - is the thing that made it worth watching to begin with) and now it's them again, brothers forged in blood and sacrifice and love, and a new appreciation for the humanity they gave up and returned to

and then we get my beloved monster of the week with no stupid too high stakes, convoluted bullshit involved, beyond the occasional angel who dean refused to reinstate and demon tracking down miscreant souls and, every once in a while, a person or creature or something in between squinting at them and going - weren't you two gods?

nah, they say, all corn fed grins and the dimples their momma gave them, we're brothers

[chaoticforever]

When The Dark Crawls | Yandere Dean Winchester x Male! Reader

Summary: Everyone knows that when a cat chases a mouse, the mouse looses. Dean lives for the thrill of the chase, and Y/n L/n? The man just wanted to leave.

A/n: Not too sure about this one.

Damn these handcuffs, Y/n thought. 

The cold metal of the handcuffs dug into his skin, causing him discomfort and making it difficult to move his right hand. He gazed around the area, hoping to find something that could allow him to unlock them, but didn’t see anything. He needed to find something fast before a certain someone came barging in here.

And that someone is Dean Winchester. 

A well-known hunter who had saved Y/n's life from bloodthirsty vampires that wanted to suck the blood out of him. In the beginning, Y/n had been so grateful to have met the man. He would be dead right now if it wasn't for Dean, after all.

However, as it turned out, that wasn't the last time they had seen each other. The following week after the whole vampire incident, the h/c man had been attacked again, and it seemed like he had nothing but bad luck with all these supernatural creatures attacking him for no reason.

Once again, Dean was there to save the day. He had shown up at the abandoned house they had Y/n trapped in with lots of silver bullets and managed to kill the werewolves and free Y/n from his binds.

Again, Y/n had thanked Dean for saving his life, and Dean just said that it wasn't an issue and that maybe he should stay with him tonight to ensure he was safe. The hunter laughed it off as a joke, but Y/n decided to take him up on that offer. He didn't want to risk another near-death experience. They say that third time's a charm, and next time he might not be so lucky to get away like the last two times.

On that day, Y/n asked about Dean's life and the circumstances that led him to engage in combat with these creatures, which he had not even believed in until a week prior. Dean explained to him that he and his brother hunt these monsters and it's the family business. Y/n couldn't imagine growing up like that, but he told Dean that if he ever needed any form of help from him, such as a place to lay low to let him know. Dean did save his life so Y/n believed that he should reciprocate.

And a friendship between them formed, where Dean would stop by whenever he was on a hunt to check in or if he simply wanted to hang out with Y/n. Y/n always welcomed him. It's not like he had many friends, so he was glad to have another. However, he had noticed something.

Like the way Dean looked at him.

Y/n was not stupid. In fact, he was quite perceptive, and he was aware that Dean had a crush on him. He made sure to let Dean know that despite his gratitude, he doesn't share the same sentiment. Dean is an attractive guy, with beautiful forest green eyes, yet he only perceives him as a friend. After the rejection, Dean said it was fine as long as they were still friends.

However, it seems that Dean lied to him, as evidenced by the way he continued to touch and stare at him. In passing, Dean would find different excuses to touch or brush up against him. He found reasons to be near Y/n; their paths crossed more frequently than before. Y/n would turn a corner, and Dean would be there, leaning against a wall with a smirk on his face. He'd be at the same coffee shop, sitting at a nearby table, looking at him with a predatory gaze. When he went on a date, there was Dean, glaring at Y/n's date the entire time with a steak knife in his hand.

Hence, he felt increasingly uneasy with Dean's constant presence, but whenever he mentioned it, the hunter insisted that he was protecting him. Y/n did not share this perspective and informed Dean that he needed some space away from him. Dean's jaw tightened, and he warned Y/n that he'd regret his dismissive treatment.

Later, he discovered that Dean had been quite serious in his words, as the day Y/n's car unexpectedly broke down on the road one night and Dean kidnapped him, taking him to a secluded cabin far away. Dean claimed that Y/n belonged to him and was protecting him from everything that was evil in the world. He had to do it.

Y/n had attempted to escape before, but he was recaptured by Dean every single time. As punishment, Dean would spank Y/n's bare ass with his hand. Since then, he had learned not to attempt an escape while Dean was present, opting instead to try when he was absent. It wasn't fair that Dean decided to ruin his life, and he was determined to reclaim his freedom.

The h/c-haired male opened the drawer next to the bed and was relieved that he saw a paperclip. He knew people usually pick door locks with this clip, therefore, he was hoping it could pick a cuff lock.

Quickly, he bent down and picked up the paperclip, his fingers shaking as he tried to manipulate it into a makeshift key. He inserted the bent end into the keyhole of the handcuffs, twisting and turning it in a desperate attempt to unlock it. Sweat beaded on his forehead as he struggled.

"C’mon," Y/n muttered under his breath. 

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the handcuffs unlocked, and the cold metal fell off his wrist. Thank God. He exhaled, rubbing his tender wrists, still feeling the lingering sensation of those handcuffs. I am free. Not wasting another moment, he stood up and darted out of the room, peering through the blinds to survey for any sign of Dean. A wave of relief came over him when he didn't spot the Impala.

Y/n's heart pounded in his chest as he bolted out of the cabin, his feet carrying him farther away from his captivity. Y/n didn't know where he was going, but he didn't care. All that mattered to him was getting as far away from this location as possible before Dean realized he's gone. Adrenaline coursed through his veins as he continued to run through the woods. despite him feeling incredibly exhausted.

Soon, Y/n reached the road and was so overjoyed when he spotted a car coming down the road. "Hey, stop!" Y/n jumped in front of the car and threw himself in front of it, causing the driver to slam on their brakes before the car could hit him.

The driver — a tall guy with brown hair —exited the car and promptly approached Y/n, looking worried. "Are you okay, sir?"

Y/n shook his head, his voice breathless from the running he did. "I'm not. This guy... he kidnapped me. Please, help me."

The tall man nodded. "I'll help you. Get in the car." He opened the passenger door.

"Thank you," Y/n slid into the passenger seat and buckled up as the other male shut the door and got behind the wheel.

"It's no issue," he turned the keys and the car roared to life. He stepped on the gas and the car cruised down the open road. The man glanced over at the one sitting in the passenger seat. "If you want, you can stay with me tonight. Then we can deal with whoever took you tomorrow."

"That would be great, thank you again." Y/n was sincere. "Do you have a name?"

After those words escaped his lips, Y/n wanted to hit himself. Of course, he has a name. Everyone on this planet has one.

The driver laughed. "It's Jared. And you?"

"Y/n."

During the remainder of the drive, Jared maintained a focused gaze on the road ahead while Y/n observed the passing scenery through the window in thought. The events of the past few months with Dean had left Y/n a bit shaken, but he felt incredibly fortunate that someone had been driving by at the right time to help Y/n escape from that stupid hunter.

When Jared brought his vehicle to a halt, Y/n shifted his attention to the imposing structure before him. The exterior looked quite old, and Y/n turned to face Jared, his expression marked by confusion.

"Uh, why are we here? I thought you said you were taking me back to your place."

"And that's what I'm doing now," Jared said. "This building is where I live. It's my bunker. You'll be safe here, don't worry."

Y/n regarded the place with suspicion, feeling a sense of unease that caused warning bells to ring in his mind. Despite his apprehension, he chose to ignore his intuition. After all, Jared had gone out of his way to help him, even though he wasn't obligated to, and Y/n decided to trust him. If it wasn't for Jared, he would still be at the cabin with Dean, and that was not a situation he wanted to be in.

Jared opened the car door for Y/n and escorted him inside the bunker. Despite the unappealing exterior, the interior was surprisingly inviting. Y/n appreciated the contrast. Jared then led Y/n to the room where he would be staying for the night, excusing himself to retrieve a blanket.

Y/n took a moment to assess the room, noting its basic amenities: a bed, a desk, and a drawer with a lamp, which was the only light source. Despite its simplicity, Y/n found the room to be quite inviting.

Later, Jared re-entered the room with a blanket, fresh towels, a washcloth, and a toothbrush. "Here's a blanket in case you get cold, a toothbrush for your teeth, and a towel and washcloth for your shower," he explained, placing the blanket on the bed, the toothbrush on the desk, and the towel and washcloth on the rack. "Get some sleep. I know it's been a long day."

"Thank you so much, Jared. I don't know what I would've done without your help." Y/n expressed his gratitude once again because he needed this man to know that he was so grateful for helping him.

Jared smiled reassuringly at Y/n. "No problem at all. I'm just glad I could help."

Jared left the room and closed the door behind him. Y/n lay on the bed and put the blankets over him, closing his eyes.

He was finally free.

Dean couldn’t get to him now.

XXXXX XXXXX

The next day, Y/n awoke feeling utterly refreshed. It had been a while since he'd slept so well, and according to the clock, he had slept for more than twelve hours. Although he hadn't intended to sleep for so long, he supposed his body needed it.

Rising up from the bed, Y/n gathered his towel, washcloth, and toothbrush, and proceeded to the bathroom. After a brief exploration, he found the bathroom and removed his clothes before entering the shower. The warm water cascaded over his skin, providing a soothing sensation as it cleansed his body and his mind.

After taking his shower and brushing his teeth, he returned to the guest room and he decided to wait for Jared to return so that they could discuss their next move.

Folding the covers meticulously, Y/n heard the door creak open from behind. Knowing that it was Jared, Y/n initiated a conversation without turning around. "Hey, Jared. Thanks for allowing me to—"

Panic seized Y/n's heart as he retreated a step. There, in the doorway, was Dean Winchester with a devilish smirk on his face that sent a shiver down Y/n's spine. No! Y/n's thoughts raced with alarm: he was free. How did Dean find him again?

Dean edged closer, attempting to narrow the gap between them. "Surprised to see me, Y/n?" he mocked, voice laced with amusement from the fear in Y/n's eyes.

Y/n retreated, pressing his back against the wall. "H-How did you find me?" he stammered, his face contorted with fear. The intimidating man's presence made it impossible for Y/n to conceal his terror.

A dark chuckle emitted from Dean's lips as he closed the remaining distance between them. Now face-to-face with Y/n, he slammed his hand against the wall beside him, trapping him against it. "Oh, I always find what's mine," he declared. "And you, sweetheart, are definitely mine."

"I'm not yours!" Y/n retorted, but his defiance was quickly overshadowed by a pressing concern. "What did you do to Jared?" he asked, worry clear in his tone.

Dean's smirk widened. "Jared's not real," he divulged, causing Y/n to stare at him in bewilderment. "His real name is Sam, my brother. And this bunker? It's ours."

Y/n felt his world shatter once the truth unraveled. He had never escaped; Jared, no Sam, brought him back to Dean. Y/n had been deceived from the beginning.

"This can't be true," Y/n whispered.

Dean's fingers trailed possessively down his arm. "It is true, my little plaything," he gripped Y/n's jaw and forced a hard kiss upon him, only to break away when Y/n continued to resist his advances. "Stop fighting it, pretty boy. Just let it happen."

No, this was bullshit. Y/n wasn't going to just let it happen or continue to cower in submission. Y/n delivered a swift kick to Dean's groin, causing him to crumple to his knees, clutching his injured area. He fled as Dean's chilling laughter echoed throughout the place  Dean taunted Y/n, urging him to run, claiming that he loved the chase. Y/n sprinted, feeling the wind whip against his face. He needed to get away on his own, unable to trust anyone in case another person he bumped into happened to be acquainted with Dean.

The surrounding area seemed devoid of buildings and people for miles, but in the distance, Y/n saw an abandoned house. It was his only option. He dashed inside. The interior had peeling wallpaper and boarded-up windows, yet it didn't look that bad. Y/n figured that Dean wouldn't consider searching for him here. His plan was to remain hidden until he was certain that he was safe, free from Dean.

The floorboards creaked beneath Y/n as he raced up the stairs, and the bathroom door was the first one he encountered. Y/n didn't hesitate before entering the shower and closed the curtain, trying his hardest to calm his ragged breathing.

Seconds turned into minutes, and in the deafening silence, Y/n believed he might have escaped Dean's clutches this time. But the illusion shattered when he heard doors opening, the floorboards creaking, and the taunting voice that was Dean's. 

Suddenly, the bathroom door opened, and Y/n stopped himself from breathing.

"Y/n, are you in here?" Dean's voice was laced with false sincerity. "Get out here. There's no point in hiding. I'll find you."

Y/n remained silent and unmoving in the shower, but it became very challenging, particularly as a spider crept up his leg. Not now. Get off me. The spider, though, disregarded Y/n's silent plea and kept crawling. Unable to endure the crawly sensation any longer, Y/n used his right foot to kick the spider off his left leg and killed it as quietly as he possibly could.

Y/n's heart pounded.

Two steps outside the bathroom, the green-eyed male halted, his attention drawn by a faint noise emanating from the shower. A smirk tugged at his mouth as he turned around, his gaze narrowing.

"So, that's where you are?" Dean walked back into the bathroom and yanked the curtains open, revealing an empty space.

A moment of confusion clouded Dean's face as he scanned the empty shower for Y/n. Unbeknownst to him, Y/n had silently exited through the second door connected to the bathroom and hidden in the nearby room's closet. This cat-and-mouse game between them intensified with each passing moment, but still, Y/n remained steadfast in his determination.

Yet, at the same time, Y/n struggled with the fear of being caught. He knew Dean was a highly skilled hunter, who's good at tracking people down. His chances of escaping were slim to none, but he was going to take his chances, nevertheless.

Y/n could hear Dean's footsteps echoing through the house, growing louder as he approached the room Y/n was hiding in. Then, the door to the room opened, and Y/n remained silent and still as Dean sauntered fully into the room. Not again.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are," Dean persisted, his voice saturated with that sick, sadistic satisfaction. "You can run, but you can't hide from me forever."

Y/n's fingers trembled as he searched for anything he could use as a weapon, but there was no weapon in the closet. Nothing. Y/n pressed himself against the wall, accidentally triggering a hidden mechanism that pushed him backward into a secret room nestled in the closet.

"Just you wait," Dean said, approaching the closet, his fingers curling around the handle with a predatory grace. "I have so many things in store for you, and you are going to love every fucking second of it. Ready or not, sweetheart, here I come."

With a swift motion, Dean yanked open the closet door, anticipating the sight of Y/n cowering in fear. To his surprise, the closet showed nothing but empty space. Dean's laugh echoed through the room. "I love this little game of cat and mouse, but trust me — I always catch my prey."

In the hidden room, Y/n's ear was on the wall, hearing the closet door closing and Dean's retreating footsteps. Y/n pushed open the secret room's door, entered the closet, and emerged into the main room.

The hidden man cracked the door open, the hinges silent, and he peered through the slightly ajar door. He observed Dean going up the stairs, heading to the attic. This was his opportunity, his one chance at freedom. Carefully, he eased the door open fully, ensuring not to make a sound.

Y/n's heart thundered in his chest as he tiptoed down the stairs, his eyes vigilant for Dean or his brother. He did not need any surprises. His pace quickened as he headed for the door, his hand hovering over the knob. He had done it. He won—

Suddenly, Y/n's body was sent crashing to the floor. Dean had appeared out of nowhere and tackled him to the ground. No, Y/n thought, his hopes shattered.

Y/n struggled to free himself from Dean's grasp and crawl toward the door, mere inches away. Dean, however, didn't plan on letting Y/n escape him this time. His grip on Y/n's legs remained firm as he pulled Y/n closer. Then, he pinned Y/n's hands above his head and placed his knee on Y/n's crotch, immobilizing him.

Dean smirked triumphantly down at his captured prey. "Man, that was a fun little game of cat and mouse, but you should know that you're my bitch." He reached into his pocket and retrieved a syringe, heightening Y/n's panic. Y/n struggled to free himself, but Dean's strength was overwhelming.  He took the cap off and quickly jabbed the needle into Y/n's arm. Weakness washed over Y/n, rendering him helpless against his impending fate.

The green-eyed hunter chuckled darkly as he looked down at Y/n, caressing his face and letting his fingers trace over Y/n's lips. "I'm taking you home now. You'll never be able to escape me, pretty boy. Stop trying, and get used to being mine."

Y/n was starting to think that Dean was right. There's no way he can escape him.

Dean felt a sense of triumph as he looked down at Y/n, his little plaything. He had won, and there was no turning back. He knew that he had done terrible things to get him, but he didn't care. All that mattered was that he had Y/n, and no one would take Y/n away from him.

As the tall man carried Y/n away from the abandoned house and to the bunker, he could feel Y/n’s body tense up in his arms. Dean knew that he was terrified, but he didn't care. He would do whatever it took to keep the other man with him, even if that meant resorting to violence.

Dean placed Y/n on the bed in his room, their room, and could sense Y/n's fear permeating the air. He relished every bit of it, loving that Y/n was afraid of him and would soon understand who owned him. Dean needed to break Y/n, to make him see that Dean was his one protector from danger. He was doing all of this for Y/n, to ensure that he was always safe.

Dean climbed into the bed, wrapping his arms around Y/n and pulling him close. He could feel Y/n's body trembling with fear, but he didn't let go. He had to show him that he's in control. Now and always.

"It's alright, baby," Dean whispered in Y/n's ear, planting a kiss on the back of his man's neck. "I'm here, and I'll protect you from anything that could harm you, but don’t even think of trying to leave again unless you want a punishment. There’s no place you can go that I won’t get you."

Y/n remained silent, which didn't bother Dean, since he knew that after this day, Y/n wouldn't dare try to leave him again.

The green-eyed man held him close, and he thought about all the things he would do to keep Y/n with him. He would make sure that Y/n never left his sight, that he never spoke to anyone else, and that he was the only one who could protect him.

After all, Dean killed the few friends Y/n had to make Y/n dependent on Dean. He had proven his love and devotion to the man in the most extreme way possible.

And now he would do whatever it took to make sure that Y/n loved him back.

XXXXX XXXXX 

[marvelfanfn2187a113]

Take Care of Her

Part 5 of the Uncaged series

Sam and Dean Winchester & little sister!reader

Requested by Anonymous (x2)

Synopsis: Sam learning to be a big brother—inside and out of the cage

Warnings: torture, mentions of torture, I tried to include some of the actual show plot in here

“You will never be safe.”

Sam pretended he couldn’t hear the voice—it was all he could do to keep it together. He knew Dean needed him, and more than that Dean needed something to go right. If that something needed to be Sam’s mind, then Sam would fake that he was ok and hope that it just happened.

You fell asleep about halfway through the movie, and Sam could feel Dean’s eyes on him after Bobby got up to go read through more lore books. Dean had been eyeing him ever since they tried to bind Death, and Death had revealed that Sam was having hallucinations.

“Hallucinations?” Dean only spoke when he was sure you were asleep. “Really? I gotta find out from Death?”

“I…” Sam sighed. “I didn’t want to put more on your plate. I’ve got a handle on it, really.”

“On what?” Dean snapped, freezing when you stirred.

“I know what’s real and what’s not,” Sam assured him in a softer tone.

“And what about her?” Dean nodded his chin at you. “She getting these visions?”

“I don’t think so.” Sam swallowed. “At least, she hasn’t said anything to me. She’s having nightmares, but I think that’s it. I think that’s part of why I know the hallucinations have to be fake—because if it was real, she would see it too.”

“Ok.” Dean sighed, getting to his feet. “I’m gonna go help Bobby. I need you to tell me if things get worse, ok?”

“I understand.”

Once Dean was gone, Sam watched as your face started to twitch, your body squirming around in a fitful sleep.

“She’s thinking about me.” Lucifer’s voice had Sam flinching, his head whipping around to see Lucifer perched on the edge of the couch. “Thinking about that first day in the cage. Do you still remember that day, Sammy? Remember our first day as roomies?”

Sam closed his eyes tightly, hoping to will away the sight of Lucifer, but instead he got bombarded with the memories of the day his life changed forever.

You were still holding onto Sam when the two of you landed in the cage.

Sam had physically felt his soul split as he fell—an excruciating experience that ended with Lucifer’s soul now separate from Sam’s body by the time they hit the floor. He still wasn’t sure how that worked, but somehow Lucifer’s soul—essence?—showed itself in the way that Sam’s human mind comprehended Lucifer; as Nick. There was no way Nick was in the cage, and Sam knew right away that it was only Lucifer.

He didn’t know why Michael didn’t split from Adam—maybe they were more in sync than Sam was with Lucifer, more in tune to the same purpose—but to Sam, it didn’t matter.

Nothing mattered except you right now. Sam had resigned himself to the fact that he would spend eternity in the cage with Lucifer, and though he hadn’t expected Adam to be forced to join him, that wasn’t nearly as awful as this. His baby sister, latching onto him at the last minute in a desperate attempt to save him, only to end up in damnation with him.

Sam found himself holding onto you tightly while Michael dropped to his knees in utter defeat, and Lucifer shrieked in anger and despair. The human-sounding shriek quickly turned into something unearthly, a high-pitched ringing that got louder and louder. Sam slammed his hands over his ears, watching you do the same. He held his hands tightly over his ears for a long moment, until he noticed that blood was starting to drip down the sides of your face the louder the ringing got.

Sam didn’t hesitate—Dean wasn’t here to look out for you anymore. Despite the pain, Sam moved his hands from his ears to you, grabbing hold of you and tucking you against him, wrapping you into an embrace and using his own hands to cover your ears.

Finally, the ringing stopped, though it was hard for Sam to tell at first since it echoed in his head for several minutes.

Sam made a decision, in those seemingly-endless moments of pure agony as he protected you from the brunt of the pain.

Sam never saw himself as much of a big brother before—sure, he knew he was older than you, but he’d deferred to Dean when it came to taking care of you. Dean had been the one to give you the monster talk, Dean was the one with the mission to protect his little siblings, Dean was the one who took over the father role when Dad died.

But you didn’t have Dean, and you needed someone. So Sam was going to step up.

He’d had moments like this before…

Like when he was 14, and John and Dean had been out on a hunt when someone knocked on the motel door.

Sam, whose instincts had already been carefully honed, snatched up his gun and checked the peephole. Seeing nothing, he eased the door open—but it wouldn’t open more than a foot.

Still wary, Sam’s eyes flickered down and widened when they landed on a basket with a moving bundle in it. His eyes snapped back up, and he glanced furiously around for someone to take the bundle back—because with only a glance, Sam knew exactly what it was.

But no one was there.

When the bundle started to cry, Sam finally made a decision. He eased himself out the door, lifting the basket into his arms and carrying it out of the cold and into the safety of the motel room.

“It’s gonna be ok,” he whispered. He eased the pink bundle out of the basket and started to rock her. “Dad and Dean are gonna be back, and their gonna take care of you. I’m—“ Sam caught sight of a note peaking out of the basket, and he scanned it quickly. “I’m your big brother, I guess. My name’s Sam.”

Or like when he was 18, and you found his stash of college fliers. You were only 4, and Sam probably could’ve gotten away with lying to you…

But he felt like he had to tell someone.

“I’m gonna be going away pretty soon,” he told you in a whisper—Dad and Dean were out on a hunt, but he still couldn’t bring himself to speak louder, just in case.

“You can’t go away,” you argued, tears already forming in your eyes. “Whose gonna play with me when Daddy and Dean go to work?”

“C’mere…” Sam scooped you into his arms, happy when you wrapped your arms around him; that meant you weren’t mad. “I’ll bet Dean will spend some more time with you. Dad too, maybe. They’ll make sure you’re ok, I promise.”

“But I want you!” The tears were flowing now, and your words were interspersed with sobs. “Don’t go away Sammy!”

“I have to,” Sam said. “I’m gonna go to college. It’s like—like school for grown ups. They’re gonna teach me how to be a lawyer.”

“But—“ you sniffled. “But I thought you worked with Daddy and Dean.”

“I do.” Sam swallowed. “But—“ he hadn’t admitted this since he was thirteen, and his teacher asked him. “But I don’t want to do what they do. It doesn’t make me happy.”

“I want you to be happy,” you insisted.

“Thanks, kid.” Sam smiled—just a little. “But…but for me to be happy, I’ve gotta get out of here.” You didn’t say anything, so Sam kept going. “But Dad and Dean can’t know yet, ok? I haven’t told them.”

“Why not?” You rubbed at your eyes, your breaths still shaky.

“They wouldn’t understand. Not like you do. So do you promise not to tell?”

You held out your tiny hand to Sam, pinky extended. “Pinky swear.”

Or like when you didn’t keep your promise.

John was screaming at Sam, waving a fistful of brochures and Sam’s Stanford acceptance letter. Sam wasn’t about to take the fight laying down—he never did. He was toe to toe with his father, screaming right back. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he registered that Dean was sitting on his bed, looking dazed, and you were nowhere to be found.

When Sam couldn’t take it anymore, he threw his few belongings into a bag—John stormed up to him and tossed the papers into the bag, yelling “Fine, go!”—and headed for the door.

“If you go out that door, don’t you ever come back!” John yelled.

Sam froze in his tracks, his hand halfway extended. He took a single glance back—his eyes met Dean’s, and all Sam saw was his big brother’s pleading expression. He looked away, wanting to say goodbye to you, but you weren’t there. So he grabbed onto the handle, stepping out into the night and slamming the door behind him.

“Sammy!”

Sam was halfway into the cab when you came running out of the motel room—you must’ve been hiding.

“Hey…” Sam pulled you in for a hug. “You gotta go back inside.”

“I’m sorry,” you cried. “I’m sorry I told Dean, I didn’t mean to tell him! I’m so sorry, please don’t go!” It was hard to make out your words between the sobs, but Sam understood enough.

“It’s ok, it’s ok,” he soothed, though he didn’t know if that was true. “That’s not why I’m leaving, but I have to go. Go back inside.”

“I don’t want you to go,” you sobbed.

“I—“ Sam faltered. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“I’m gonna miss you.”

Sam kissed your head. “I’m gonna miss you too. Now go on, go, it’s ok.” Sam waited until you were safely back in the motel room before he climbed into the cab.

He didn’t look back.

He’d had big brother moments…

…but none of those moments had ever had such finality and meaning.

It was a good decision—it kept him grounded for some of his time in hell, and gave him purpose. Even if it caused a lot of pain.

“You do remember that day!” Lucifer’s voice dragged Sam out of his memories. “You remember how you begged me to stop? And I told you all you had to do was step out of the way and watch while I had some fun with your baby sister. But you just wouldn’t do it Sammy.” Lucifer clicked his tongue, shaking his head. “You just had to be so darn protective. Not that it ever did her any good. I got plenty of torture in without your help, isn’t that right little N/N?” Lucifer’s hand ghosted over the side of your face, and Sam flinched.

“Don’t touch her,” he spat through gritted teeth. Your face twisted, as if you could feel the devil’s presence, but your eyes stayed closed. “Stop giving her nightmares.”

“Nightmares?” Lucifer grinned. “Oh, no Sammy, she’s with me. You’re the one in a dream right now—yeah, all this? Your perfect little life?” Lucifer gestured around them. “It’s a dream—it isn’t real. And what you’re seeing now is your baby sister sleeping, but what I’m seeing—“

The room around Sam snapped away for a split second before returning, then disappearing again. In its place, he saw the room of his waking nightmares.

He saw the cage.

And he saw you, in a position that was all-too familiar. Hooks sticking through your arms were holding you to the bars on the walls of the cage. Lucifer was standing near your hanging form, a curved blade in his hand as he cut into you again and again and again and again and—

“No!”

Bobby’s house returned in the blink of an eye, and you sat up with a gasp of terror, awoken by Sam’s outburst.

“I told you.” Lucifer grinned at Sam. “You never got out. Either of you. And you never will.”

…

He was here. You could see him. The dream was over, but Lucifer was still here.

Looking at him—sitting there on Bobby’s couch—was too much. You turned away, seeking solace in Sam’s arms—he’d stayed with you when you fell asleep on the couch.

“Bad dreams?” There was a quaver in Sam’s voice as he asked, and you wondered if he’d fallen asleep and had nightmares too.

“Yeah.” Your voice was muffled against Sam’s shirt, and you hoped he wouldn’t notice the nervous tone in your voice. You had promised never to lie to Sam, but you couldn’t tell him about seeing Lucifer—you just couldn’t. You didn’t want to scare him as much as you were already scared. You didn’t want him to start thinking what you were already afraid of; that you’d really never left the cage.

It wasn’t a lie, anyway—you really did have a nightmare. You were dreaming about that first day in the cage, and watching Sam get tortured for protecting you.

Until Lucifer got bored with that and tortured you anyway, when Sam was too bloodied up and weak to stop it.

“You’re not gonna talk about me?” Lucifer’s voice sent a shiver through you, and you burrowed further against your big brother. “You’re just gonna pretend I’m not here?”

“Sam?” You choked out. “Do…do you ever wonder if we’re still in the cage?” You held your breath, desperate for Sam to take away your fear. You knew you wouldn’t stop being scared no matter what he said, though.

“Ladies and gentlemen, give the girl a prize!” Lucifer taunted. “I think she’s got it! Of course you’re still in the cage!”

“We’re not—“ Sam’s voice caught, and he hesitated. “I…I don’t know. I really don’t.”

“Sometimes I don’t know if I’m dreaming or awake.” You whispered the words, as if afraid to shatter the tense air.

“It’s too good.” Both of you knew Sam was trying to convince himself as much as you. “He would never let us feel this happy. Right?”

“That’s what makes it fun!” Lucifer insisted. You turned your head into Sam’s chest, trying to pretend the devil wasn’t there.

You had no idea that Sam could see him too.

“I got your message.“ Cas’s voice startled you, and you pulled away from Sam to look for the source; he was standing in the doorway, and Lucifer was gone. Cas was covered in sores and blood, and he was staring right at Sam. “I need your help.”

…

It turned out that Sam had prayed to Cas, pleading with him to see reason and get rid of the souls that were consuming him from the inside out. Once Cas started to fall apart, he decided to listen to your brother.

Seeing Sam—not only ok, but solving the world’s problems—made you feel even more crazy, and ashamed that you couldn’t seem to keep it together.

“We’re ready.”

The five of you were back in the warehouse where it all began, waiting for an eclipse to open purgatory.

“We need the blood,” Dean said. “Sam, it’s on a shelf in the back hallway. Take Y/N.”

You trailed behind Sam—you were so happy they didn’t leave you behind, you didn’t care what they gave you to do.

“I think that’s it—“ you we’re just pointing to a long shelf that had a jar of blood sitting on the center of it, when a figure appeared in the hallway.

“Hey Sam.” Lucifer’s voice sent a shiver down your spine, but what surprised you wasn’t his presence; it was who he chose to speak to. Sam didn’t see him…right?

Your gaze switched to your brother, but he wasn’t looking at you. He was looking right at the devil.

“Sam?” You tried to get your brother’s attention, but he wouldn’t look away from Lucifer.

“I thought I told you to shut up.” Lucifer’s eyes were suddenly on you. That caught Sam’s attention, and now he was staring at you.

“You can see him?” Sam’s voice was barely above a whisper, as if he was afraid of his own words.

“I—I’ve—I’m—“ you were still trying to process that it wasn’t just you—that maybe you weren’t crazy. That maybe you were still in the cage after all. “I’ve been seeing him since this morning,” you admitted. “And hearing him longer. I didn’t want you to worry, I—I didn’t want it to be real.”

“Aww,” Lucifer cooed. “Both of you going mad, and neither one telling the other.”

“Shut up!” Sam snapped.

“Except—“ Lucifer continued as if Sam hadn’t spoken “���You’re both just finally realizing the truth. I never would’ve let you go, especially not both of you. You think I woulda lost both my toys like that? I mean, the fact that you believed it this long is just embarrassing.”

“Sam?” You stared up at your big brother, wanting more than anything for him to have the answer to the question you didn’t dare ask. Instead of an answer, you were rewarded with Lucifer’s hand around your neck as he shoved you around the corner of the hallway and up against the wall.

“I don’t like being ignored,” he growled.

“Stop!” Sam rushed at Lucifer, but a backhand from Lucifer’s free hand sent Sam flying back against the shelves.

“Now doesn’t this feel real?” Lucifer’s hand tightened against your throat, and your gasp for air was cut short.

“It’s…it’s not real.” Sam got to unsteady feet. “It’s just—it’s just our memories of hell leaking through. Y/N, it’s not real.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” Lucifer scoffed, dropping you and turning to Sam. “But you’re about to see just how real I am.”

…

By the time the devil was done with you, you weren’t sure how much hope was left inside. But when Dean rounded the corner calling your name, you still ran to him. You still wrapped your arms around him. You still clung to him like a lifeline.

Because even if he wasn’t real, hugging him was still the best thing you’d felt for as long as you could remember.

“Hey.” Dean’s voice was gruff and on the edge of panic. “We gotta move, let’s go.”

You didn’t speak as Dean and Bobby led you and Sam outside. You lingered behind Dean, letting Sam catch up to you. As you took hold of his hand, you realized that the bloody marks and bruises Lucifer had left on the two of you were now gone.

You weren’t sure if that helped or not—Lucifer had healed your injuries countless times before, because he always thought it was more fun to give you a moment of pain relief before starting in again on the torture. As soon as your hand was in his, Sam met your eye and squeezed your hand. You squeezed his back twice, and the ghost of a smile lifted his lips.

The two of you had no idea if you were safe in the real world with Dean and Bobby, or if you were locked in eternal torture with the devil and his crazy brother.

But for now, you could hold onto each other, and it was almost enough.

…

“Sam.

“Sam.

“Sam.”

Sam jerked awake with a gasp to find Dean leaning over him. You stirred in the chair next to him, blinking your eyes open slowly—not in a tired way, though; it was more like you didn’t want to know what you would see once your eyes were open.

“Twelve hours, I’m calling that rested,” Dean went on, ignoring the terrified glance Sam shared with you. “Here.” He tossed a water bottle to you, then Sam, then followed it with a granola bar. “Hydrate, and—uh—proteinate.”

Dean then grabbed hold of Sam’s hand and peeled the bandage off—you weren’t sure when Sam’s hand got hurt, or why it was the only injury that he kept when the two of you walked away from Lucifer. But you didn’t question it—you had too many questions already.

“Aww.” You flinched when Lucifer appeared on the couch next to Sam. “He wants to hold your wittle hand.”

You watched as Sam forced his eyes on Dean, ignoring the devil completely.

“You’ll live,” Dean decided, moving aside to let Bobby rebandage Sam’s hand. “Now, I need you two to tell me what happened back there. You disappeared, and you looked pretty freaked when we found you.”

Sam couldn’t meet Dean’s eye as he spoke up for the two of you.

“It’s not just me,” Sam admitted. “She…she sees him too.”

Dean steeled his features quickly and took a deep breath.

“Him?” He asked.

Sam nodded, swallowing hard.

“It’s not just flashbacks anymore,” Sam said. “It’s—I’m having a hard time telling what’s real and what’s not. And I can see…him.”

“And you see him too?” Dean was looking at you. “You can see Lucifer?”

You nodded mutely, keeping your eyes trained on the carpet.

“So…so you guys are seeing the same thing? Every time?” Dean looked from Sam to you.

“I…” Sam tried to look at you, but you didn’t look up. “I think so.”

“Hey, any time you wanna chime in here kid,” Dean snapped.

You flinched, glancing at Dean before your gaze turned to Sam.

“Easy,” Sam told Dean. “She…it’s a lot.” Sam met your gaze head-on, and the two of you shared a near-psychic moment.

Lucifer was watching. Lucifer—whether he was real or not—could make you feel pain. Even if it didn’t leave a mark, you could still feel it.

“It’s not her fault,” Lucifer taunted. “She’s just being a good, silent little toy, just like I taught her. Right kid?”

Your gaze had returned to the floor, and Sam watched as your breathing became faster and you curled in on yourself.

“So he’s telling you that you’re still in the cage? That all this is fake?” Dean asked.

Sam nodded for the both of you.

Dean was quiet for a moment, and Sam knew he was trying to come up with some way to convince you and him that Lucifer was wrong.

“Ok,” Dean said. “Why would he give you this? Why would he make you think you’re happy when he can just kick you two all over the cage?”

“You can’t torture someone who has nothing left for you to take away.” Lucifer piped in, nodding at Sam. Sam swallowed hard, and repeated the words to Dean. “Very good Sam,” Lucifer crowed, and Sam looked away quickly.

“What about each other?” Dean pointed from you to Sam. “I mean, that seems like something he could take away.”

“It felt like we were there for a hundred years, Dean,” Sam admitted. “I…I guess we got pretty used to seeing each other tortured, and Lucifer got bored with it.”

He was right; it had been Lucifer’s favorite game to torture the two of you with each other.

Ever since the beginning, he always knew it was the most effective tactic…

“How about this?” Lucifer was wiping blood off his hands as he spoke. “My arms are starting to get a little tired. So how about—Sam, you torture your little baby sister, huh? Is that a genius idea or what?”

Sam was choking on his own blood, but he still managed a couple of words—

“Screw you.”

“Well that’s not very nice,” Lucifer scoffed. “You haven’t even heard my deal yet—you torture the kid, or I’ll rip her to shreds. Now, obviously, none of us can die down here, but I promise you; my methods of torture will be much worse than anything you could think of in your wildest nightmares.”

Sam turned to look at you—he didn’t want to make this decision.

As soon as you saw Sam looking at you, you shook your head immediately. Sam understood—he wouldn’t want to make you do that, either.

“I see you’re having trouble deciding,” Lucifer cut in. “I’ll let you two have a little chat about it, before the fun starts. But you’d better hurry up before my offer expires, and I tear you both apart piece by piece.”

Sam rushed to you, never one to waste an opportunity to talk to you.

“No, don’t,” you whimpered. “Sam, don’t. I’d rather let him rip my bones out then it be you, please. Please Sam.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Sam insisted.

“It-it’s not just that,” you told him. “I…I don’t want to look at you and think about—“

“Ok…ok.” Sam breathed a sigh of relief—the last thing he wanted to do was torture you, but if it would save you from more pain he would do it, if that was what you wanted. But you didn’t want that; you wanted—needed—Sam to be a safe person in your mind. Sam needed the same.

As long as the two of you could look at each other and see something safe, maybe you would be able to hold on to your sanity.

“But this is way more fun, right little toy?” Lucifer was tugging at your arm, trying to get you to look at him. Your breathing got even more panicked, and Sam couldn’t tear his eyes away from the scene.

“Hey, are you seeing him now?” Dean demanded.

Sam nodded mutely.

“You know he isn’t real, right?” Dean said.

Sam finally turned to look at his brother. “He says the same thing about you,” he said.

Dean’s mouth closed suddenly, and he blinked in surprise. He didn’t have anything to say to that.

“Ok.” Bobby spoke up for the first time. “It’s back to the books.”

Sam watched Bobby and Dean walk out, and when he looked back at you, Lucifer was gone. He didn’t waste the opportunity—Sam rushed to you, pulling you into his arms and holding you until your breathing evened out again.

“We’re gonna be ok,” he whispered.

You looked around, making sure Lucifer wasn’t in the room before choking out a few whispered words.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Me, Sammy?” Your lip was quivering and your eyes were scanning his face, searching for an answer he wasn’t sure he had.

“I wasn’t trying to lie to you,” Sam promised. “I just…I didn’t think it was real. I didn’t want you to think we were back there, because I didn’t want to think we were back there.” Sam brushed your hair behind your ears. “What about you? You kept this from me, too.”

“I didn’t mean to,” you mumbled. “It was only dreams at first. Then I—I couldn’t tell if I was asleep or awake sometimes. Then you seemed to be handling things so well, so I—I just thought it would go away.” You sought out Sam’s hand with your own. “I don’t know how I didn’t see it. I thought we knew each other inside and out by now.”

“I guess we were both going through so much, it was hard to see straight,” Sam said.

“Don’t do that again,” you pleaded. “We should…we should tell each other stuff like this. We went through—“ you swallowed. “Through—through everything together already. We shouldn’t have to hide anything.”

Sam smiled, and instead of responding with words, he gave your hand a gentle squeeze. You smiled back, responding with two squeezes of your own.

“Well I think this is a swell idea!” You and Sam flinched at the same time when Lucifer reappeared. “Now, where were we? Oh yeah—eternal torment.”

Taglist:

@nyotamalfoy @mrvlxgrl @chocorade @aestheticdaisies @inlovewhithafairytale @that-wannabe-vangoghgurl @casmustdiee @987coley @deadlymistletoe @wayward-impala83 @whump-loverz @johannelis2302nely @studiogrimm810 @tell-elle

Uncaged Taglist:

@redbird-tf @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @o-birdseed-o @hopefuldreamers-world

[ambiguous-avery]

Intro

Hello, hello! A pleasure to meet you! My name is Avery, and I like to spend my time moonlighting as a writer. I typically write original content, however, I have recently slipped down the Supernatural rabbit hole, and my hyperfixation hasn't let me go. So, here we are.

A like, comment, reblog, or follow would be very much appreciated! Don’t see something you want to read? Send me a request! I’ll do my best to capture your idea!

Please feel free to message me! My DMs are open and I am desperate to talk to people love chatting with others! Whether you need a random internet stranger to talk to so you know you’re not screaming into the void or you just want to talk about something that makes you happy, I want to hear it all! This is a safe space!

-- Avery 💜💜💜

Chasing Shadows

Dean Winchester x OC fem!Touched!Reader/You She’s never been afraid of the dark, not really. She’s more concerned about getting lost in it. He’s haunted by every dark deed he’s ever done. It’s constantly nipping at his heels like a hell hound. He’s her light in the dark, and she’s the one bit of darkness he’s willing to embrace.

***SERIES COMPLETE***

A series using @aylacavebear's Touched concept, used with permission, of course. Send her lots of love! Universal tags for the series: No use of Y/N, canon-typical violence, eventual romance, eventual smut,  fluff and angst, POV alternating (sometimes a little all over the place), slow burn (?), angst, hurt/comfort, no beta we die like men Each part will have its own list of tags included in it.

Chasing Shadows Masterlist

Moon Without Stars

Sam Winchester x fem!Reader/You Hunters – the people who lived fast and lawless – had one rule they all abided by. No attachments. And in a world where your first touch with your soulmate would leave a brand behind, No Touching was an unspoken second rule. Not everyone followed that, but you did. Or you tried to. The last thing you needed was for fate to be cruel and bind you to someone. Least of all someone like Sam Winchester.

***Series Updates on Fridays PST***

Tags/Warnings: Soulmate AU, sad Sam (that’s a warning all of its own), hurt no comfort, idiots fighting fate, strangers to enemies to lovers, slow burn, mutual pining, angst, no use of Y/N, no beta we die like men

Moon Without Stars Masterlist

Three Hearts, One Flame

Dean Winchester x fem!Reader/You x Sam Winchester A mini-series about Sam and Dean both falling for the same girl and thinking she should be with the other. Little do they know, she's got some feelings of her own for them. Both of them. No wincest

***SERIES COMPLETE*** likely will add stories to it in the future

Universal tags for the series: SMUT 18+ MDNI, No use of Y/N, no wincest, pining, no beta we die like men

Three Hearts, One Flame Masterlist

Everything else that doesn’t belong in other categories. Everything will be tagged accordingly, biggest tags will be noted in the list and others will be in the stories as necessary. REQUESTS are nestled under here as well!

Oneshots/Drabbles/Misc Masterlist

A collection of short songfics with various pairings. Tags will vary for each story. Song title is the name of each fic, and there is a link to each fic's inspiration song in each post. Give 'em a listen!

Songfic Masterlist

Don't see something you want to read? Take a look at my rules. If these sound good to you, feel free to send me a request, and I'll see what I can do! Find my completed requests nestled under the Oneshots/Drabbles/Misc Masterlist!

I currently only write for Sam and Dean Winchester. I may branch out over time, but this is my current roster.

No wincest! I won't write them together, however, if we're talking a poly relationship where you're seeing both of them but they're not involved, I'm okay with that!

I generally stay away from super dark things such as noncon and dubcon.

Requests are currently: Open Send one in!

---

Drop a comment, ask away, or add yourself to my taglist!

[scarletqueenx]

chapter fifteen - weak spot

Dean Winchester x Female Reader

Summary: After a few months dating, Dean abandoned you in a motel room without giving you any explanation, years later his brother and he saved you from a demon and now you hunt with them discovering every day new mysteries about your family and the destiny that awaits you. Heaven, hell, demons, angels, vampires, witches and much more.

A/N: English is not my first language. This is my first time writing in the readers perspective, as i'm used to write oc´s.

series masterlist

While Sam and Dean pulled off their little plan to summon Ruby in order to lock her up and steal her demon-killing knife, you continued to try and improve with your magic. Now working against the clock so you could fight Lilith.

Your weapons and clothes were already set up and packed in your duffle bag, ready to travel to Indiana. You hadn't even thought about staying at Bobby's house and letting Sam and Dean go alone. Especially now that Maddie had finally confirmed what Dean had told you, that she and Peter were safe.

"Dad." You sighed with relief as you answered that sudden call. "Thank God."

"Actually, thank me." A female voice answered. A shiver ran down your spine at the coldness in her voice.

"Ophelia."

"That's right, sweetheart, it's me. In the flesh." The demon on the other end of the line smiled. "Listen to me very carefully 'cause you're going to do as I say if you want to see your father alive again."

You gulped as you nodded, even though Ophelia couldn't see you. Still the smile on the demon's face grew, knowing she had you undivided attention.

"I know you know where Lilith is now. So do I. So if you want me to let your father go while he's still breathing, you'll go there."

"Why? What for?" You frowned.

"I want her to see you die in front of her eyes, to see her plans shatter before her face. You die, your father lives. Just like that." Ophelia's request left you breathless. Your lips went completely dry and your hands began to tremble.

Biting your lower lip nervously, you ran a hand over your face before speaking. "I need proof that you have him and that he's still alive." You demanded, trying to remain calm, but still your voice came out slightly shaky.

"I figured you'd say that." Ophelia replied, turning around to look at the man who was tied and gagged in a chair. "I'll send you a video as soon as this call is over. Oh, and honey, I really hope you know that this is not personal."

Before you could say anything, Ophelia ended the call, leaving you in stony silence.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

Trapped inside a devil's trap with a demonic binding link drawn on his right arm, Dorian watched as Carter paced back and forth inside the basement of Maddie Lockhart's house. He had been sent there by Ophelia under orders to kill Peter.

The truth was that Dorian had not imagined ending up trapped by the very boy he had possessed years before. When Dorian had arrived at the house, he had found it strangely empty. He knew for sure that Maddie and Peter were in town, so it was especially strange to him that at that early hour of the morning neither would be in bed. Instead, Carter caught him completely off guard with his knowledge of magic, the devil trap, and his demon-killing knife.

"I hope you have a plan."

"Shut up." The eldest of the Holloway siblings ordered him.

Carter had been fighting for hours against his impulses to finish the demon in front of him once and for all. He'd been looking forward to this moment for 14 years. To have him in front of him and be able to kill him once and for all. Not exorcise him and send him back to hell. No. Kill him. And now that he could, he had to think coldly and focus on helping his sister.

"Why are you waiting so long to kill me, Carter?" Dorian raised his eyebrows. "I know you're looking forward to it."

"I said shut up." Carter insisted, pointing the knife at him. Dorian formed an o with his lips and smiled.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, Carter looked at the contacts on his phone once again. He had only three numbers on it, his father, his sister and Dean Winchester's. The latter he had called hours earlier, assuring him that Peter and Maddie were safe, though in reality Carter had no idea if that was even true, as he hadn't found them there either.

Almost as if they were connected, Dean was also checking his latest calls as doubts swirled around in his head. You were on the second floor of Bobby's house, preparing to accompany him and his brother on their mission to take down Lilith. But Dean was hesitant as to whether that was what he wanted. I mean, sure, he'd love to work things out with you, take down Lilith and be spared from ending up in hell, but deep down, Dean knew this was his last mission and it could only end one way, with him dead. If you were as scared of the idea of seeing him die as he was scared of the idea of you dying, then he didn't want you in New Harmony. But he also didn't know what he could do to keep you away other than lie to you and tell you that Peter was in danger back in Salem.

You would give up everything, including him, for your little brother.

"We're just gonna let Ruby rot down there?" Sam asked while he loaded their weapons.

Letting out a sigh, Dean turned off his phone.

"That's the idea." He answered.

"Dean, what if, uh... What if Ruby's right? What if I can take out Lilith?" Sam insisted causing Dean to look up at him with an angry, doubting look. "Quit looking at me like that."

"What, are you gonna give her the Carrie-stare and Lilith goes "poof"?" Dean asked in disbelief. Sam rolled his eyes.

"I don't know what Ruby meant. You know, maybe we should just go ask her." Sam suggested.

"Sam, you wanted the knife – I got you the knife." Dean said, getting up to walk over to the table where his gun was placed.

"Dean, just listen to me for a second." Sam insisted, following him with his gaze. "Last time Lilith snapped her fingers and put thirty demons on our ass, and all we got's one little knife? I mean, like you said, we go in smart or we don't go in at all."

"Well, this ain't smart." Dean assured his brother as he loaded his gun.

"We got one shot at this, Dean. Just one. So if there's a sure-fire way then maybe we should just talk about it."

"Sam." Dean walked up to him as he spoke. "We are not gonna make the same mistake all over again."

"You said that but what does it even mean?" Sam frowned.

"Don't you see a pattern here? Dad's deal, my deal, now this? I mean every time one of us is – is – is up the creek the other is begging to sell their soul. That's all this is, man. Ruby's just jerking your chain down the road. You know what it's paved with and you know where it's going." Dean turned around, walking back to te table to sit against it and pick up the weapons again.

"Dean." Sam said, taking a sit next to his brother as Dean continued to assemble the weapon. "What do you think is gonna happen? This is me, I can handle it." Dean stayed silent, staring at the ground as he stopped what he was doing and shook his head. "And if it'll save you..."

"Why even risk it?" Dean cut him off, looking up at him. Sam signed and looked away for a beat before looking back at him.

"Because you're my brother. Because you did the same thing for me."

"I know, and look how that turned out." Dean scoffed. "All I'm saying... Sammy, all I'm saying is that you're my weak spot." Sam frowned at his words. "You are. And I'm yours."

"You don't mean that. We're... we're family." Sam said, getting choked up.

"I know. And those evil sons of bitches know it too. I mean, what we'll do for each other, you know, how far we'll go? They're using it against us."

"So what? We just stop looking out for each other?"

"No, we stop being martyrs, man. We – we – we stop spreading it for these demons." Dean answered, picking up Ruby's knife. "We take this knife, and we go after Lilith our way. The way Dad taught us to. And if we go down, then, uh... then we go down swinging." Sam stayed silent for a few seconds, just looking at him. "What do you think?"

"I think you totally should have been jamming 'Eye of the Tiger' right there." Sam finally answered with a crack of a smile.

"Oh, bite me. I totally rehearsed that speech, too." Dean said, rising up to his feet.

"So, Indiana, huh?" Sam asked, changing the subject.

"Yeah, where Lilith's on shore-leave." Dean sighed.

"Yeah, I guess."

"Tell me something." Dean looked back to his brother. "The hell's a demon do for fun?"

"Making deals, go around killing families... you name it." You answered walking down the stairs. Sam and Dean looked back at you.

"Christine was your moms weak spot." Dean assumed then, thoughtfully.

You let out a sigh and nodded, letting your bag slide off your shoulder, into your hand and onto the ground.

"And the deal she make to save her, got her killed." You added. "My father's weak spot was my mother, and his deal for them to start a family and have children led to Carter, Peter and I ending up in the eye of Lilith's plan. Not to mention that Ophelia's weak spot caused us to have witch powers."

"Are you trying to say that you agree with Dean?" Sam frowned. "That talking to Ruby, listen to her, will only make things worse."

"I'm just stating facts, Sam." You answered. "You do whatever you want with them. I'm going to Indiana with or without you two. I'm gonna kill Lilith and Ophelia."

"Ophelia is there?" Dean looked back at you, surprised. You nodded.

"She has my father." You explained. "Guess my family is also my weak spot."

Sam nodded as he looked back and forth between his brother and you. Maybe you were both right and your weak spots were your respective families, but it was more than obvious that you were also each other's weak spots.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

Prepared for the battle against Lilith with all the necessary weapons and determined to end it once and for all and save Dean's fate, the two Winchester brothers and you settled inside the Impala, ready to begin their journey to New Harmony.

However, when Dean tried to start the car, it wouldn't start. That's when, suddenly, Bobby showed up outside Dean's door, scaring the them with his sudden appearance.

"Where do you think you're going?" He asked.

You let out the air she had been holding, looking at Bobby and the distributor cap he was holding in his hand. Letting out a frustrated sigh, Dean got out of the impala, soon followed by Sam and you. As he looked at the three of you, it was clear that Bobby was not happy. But then again, neither was Dean.

"We got the knife." Dean explained.

"And you intend to use it without me." He noted. "Do I look like a ditchable prom-date to you?"

You almost chuckled at his words, but before you could, Sam stood in the middle next to Dean and Bobby.

"No, Bobby. Of course not." Sam replied.

"This is about me... and Sam. Ok?" Dean said, looking back at Bobby. "This isn't your fight."

Bobby walked up to Dean, furious by those words.

"The hell it isn't!"

Taken aback by his response, Dean looked at him an then at you.

"Family don't end with blood, boy." Bobby said, gaining back his full attention. "Besides, you need me."

"Bobby." Dean tried.

"You're playing wounded." He noted. "Tell me, how many hallucinations have you had so far?"

Confused by his words, Sam and you turned to look at Dean. He looked back at you for a few short seconds, tilting his head one time before turning back to Bobby.

"How'd you know?" Dean asked.

"Because that's what happens when you've got hellhounds on your butt." Bobby replied like it was obvious. "And because I'm smart."

"Why didn't you tell us?" You asked.

"What did you want me to say? That every time I looked at you and Sam, what looked back at me was a strange hallucination that made you look like monsters?" Dean looked back at you.

"Well, not with those words. But..."

"We don't have time to argue." Bobby cut you off. "I'm going with you. Like it or not, you're stuck with me. I'll follow."

With nothing else to say, Bobby walked away from you, over to his own car. After shooting a quick glance at the Winchester brothers, especially Dean, you took your things out of the Impala and walked after the man to climb into the passenger seat of his car. Dean decided not to ask or say anything and let you go with Bobby before walking over to the hood of his car, ready to put back the part.

"Don't be stopping to pee every ten minutes either." Bobby exclaimed before climbing to his car.

Dean stopped in his tracks at this and shook his head a bit with a raised brow.

"I mean it." Bobby added, now in a normal volume as he looked back at you.

"Oh, I know." You sighed with a glare of amusement in your eyes.

"Why don't you go with them?" Bobby asked as he started the car.

"And deal with the tension between Dean and me? No, thanks. He thinks I left him in that motel to get back at him because he did the same thing to me. And that's fine, I don't care, but I'd rather ride with you." You sighed, resting your elbow against the window. "Besides, they're brothers, and if this doesn't end the way we want it to... they deserve that time alone."

"What about you?" Bobby turned to look at you.

"I'll survive." You assured him, looking back at him.

Bobby studied you with his gaze, taking in every little gesture, not believing your words. Since meeting you, Bobby couldn't help but notice your resemblance to both your parents. And over the years he couldn't help but notice your similarities to John Winchester as well, even if you weren't related. And if that told him anything, it was that you wouldn't survive if Dean ended up dead. Mourning his death would consume you, as it had consumed Henry and John. You would end up drowning on your own tears. Or into something far more harmful.

You had a long trip ahead of you, so you took the opportunity to continue reading about magic from all the books Bobby had given you. Occasionally, he would turn on the radio to fill the silence in the vehicle, other times the two of you would engage in small talk. They talked mostly about different supernatural creatures and the stories you both had with Laurel. Also, for the first time in years, you allowed yourself to reminisce and talk about the years you had shared with your older brother and how Peter's birth had been one of the happiest for Carter. The nostalgia hurt, but it also gave you the strength you needed to face Ophelia.

With barely 20 minutes left in the trip, Bobby and you witnessed from the car as Dean had pulled over on the side of the road under the orders of a policeman and was now getting out of the Impala to beat him up and stab him with the demon-killing knife.

"What the hell happened?" Bobby rushed out of the car and ran towards them, confused and worried.

"Dean just killed a demon." Sam replied as you reached their side. "How'd you know?"

Dean, still breathing heavily, looked around on the ground and then turned to Sam who was still looking shocked.

"I just knew." He answered, looking down to the officer.

"What do you mean?" You frowned.

"I could see its face. Its real face under that one." Dean looked up at you.

"That's new." You sighed, sharing a quick look with Bobby.

Not wanting to get caught by some human police or other demons Bobby, the Winchester brothers and you made sure to hide the body and the police car under several tree branches on the side of the road. The darkness of the night gave them an advantage in being unnoticed too, but you had to move fast. Ophelia had set a time for your meeting and Dean's time was running out by the minute.

"So what, now you're seeing demons?" Sam turned to his brother.

"I've seen all kinds of things lately but... nothing like this." Dean said.

"Actually it's not all that crazy." Bobby spoke.

"How's it not that crazy?"

"Well you've got, just over five hours to go? You're piercing the veil, Dean. You're glimpsing the B side."

"A little less new age-y please." Dean frowned,

"You're almost hell's bitch. So, you can see hell's other bitches." Dean looked at you with surprise as you answered for Bobby, but his expression soon turned into a mock-face.

"Thank you."

You smiled back at him.

"Well, actually it could come in pretty handy." Sam commented.

"Oh, well, I'm glad my doomed soul is good for something." Dean scoffed.

"Damn right it is." Bobby nodded. "Lilith's probably got demons stashed all over town. We can't let them sound the alarm. She knows we're here, we're dead before we're started."

"Well, this is a terrific plan. I'm excited to be a part of it." He sighed. "Can we go, please?" He asked as he began walking back to his car with Bobby, Sam and you following.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

You hadn't yet fully taken in the situation you were in, but you certainly did when you arrived at the place where not only Lilith was hiding, but Ophelia was waiting for you. As soon as you got out of Bobby's car the anticipation of your and Dean's inevitable goodbye clouded you vision and made you feel sick.

Knowing you two would need time alone, Sam joined Bobby by his car, leaving you to approach Dean next to the Impala.

Dean wasn't good with words. He never had been. And when he saw you walking towards him with that sad, pain-filled look on your face, something broke inside of him knowing he couldn't say anything to make it better. Even if he was good with words, things didn't look like they were going to go well that night. Dean wanted to die swinging and you respected that.

"Listen, Dean, I... I don't know what to say." You began as you tried to shallow your tears. "I'm sorry I left the way I did and I'm sorry I couldn't do anything to help you. And I'm sorry I can't fight by your side tonight and..."

"Hey." Dean interrupted you. "You don't have to apologize to me for anything, okay? You have to save your dad."

"And you have to have some hope that this is gonna work."

"We both know it won't. I'm going to hell. But I'm gonna die fighting. For Sammy." He pointed towards his brother.

You turned to looked back at Sam as she nodded.

Feeling your heart ache as you met his greenish gaze once again, you couldn't fight your need to pull Dean close and wrap him in a hug any longer. Though surprised by the gesture at first, Dean soon wrapped his arms around your shoulders, resting his chin on your head and closing his eyes as glimpse of peace washed over him.

You closed your eyes too, nuzzling against him and tucking your head into his chest, taking in his scent as you tightened your hold. The shadow of a sad smile peeked over Dean's lips as he left a kiss on top of your hair. Unable to help it, in that instant a tear slipped down your cheek, wetting Dean's shirt, but he didn't care.

"Does this mean you forgive me for abandoning you in that motel room?" Dean asked, breaking the silence.

You couldn't help but smile in amusement at his words. You pulled away a little and looked into his eyes.

"I think we're even." You answered. Dean nodded, looking back at you.

After a few more seconds in each other's arms, Dean cleared his throat awkwardly, taking a step back. Saddened by having to part from him, you ran your hand over your face to wipe away any traces of tears as Sam and Bobby approached you. The latter handed you a gun.

You took it, thanking him in a whisper as you placed it on the back of your belt.

"Good luck." Bobby told you.

"Likewise." You replied, giving the three of them a look and a faint smile that didn't quite reach your eyes before separating from them to continue on your way to where you were supposed to meet Ophelia.

Your walk to the street where Ophelia was waiting for you wasn't very long, but it was long enough to put you in situation and leave behind your goodbye with Dean. At least for now.

The moment your eyes met the figures of Ophelia and your father on the other side of that empty residential street a wave of feelings washed over you. Fear, determination and a searing anguish filled with anticipation. You knew what Ophelia wanted to happen that night, and she knew you had no weapon to stop her, but somehow, you also knew that was it. Every second of doubt and pain since your mother's death was coming to an end that night.

"I'm glad you could make it." Ophelia smiled at you from a distance, as she held Henry against her and placed the blade of a sharp knife over his neck. "I know you want to go back to your boyfriend to try to save his life. But let me tell you something, you can't. Dean Winchester is going to die tonight. But... maybe you can do something for your father."

"I get it, you're evil. Are we going to keep talking or are you going to kill me?" You complained, rolling your eyes.

Ophelia smiled back at you, unamused.

"Actually... no. I won't be the one to kill you tonight. That's up to you. Wrists, neck, the hara-kiri even. I don't really care how. You die and I let your father go."

"I don't trust you. Do you really think I'm gonna kill myself without seeing him go first?"

"You'll have to trust me because..."

"I have another plan." A third voice interrupted her.

Recognizing him instantly, you quickly turned around to find your older brother standing several feet behind you along with the man you quickly recognized as Dorian. Especially when you saw the symbol on his arm that bound the demon to the body he currently possessed, keeping him from escaping.

"You free my father and I'll let Dorian go." Carter offered, showing the demon-killing knife created by his mother. The knife he had stolen from you in the hospital after your car accident.

Hope.

A faint, fleeting glimmer of hope flashed through your mind like a shooting star in the sky. Fast, so fast that if you blinked you would have missed it. And just as that hope came to you, so did a realization. Someone like Ophelia wouldn't care enough for anyone to mess up her plan. Carter didn't have the advantage he thought he had over her. His threat meant nothing to Ophelia.

"What do you think you're doing?" Maddie's hand clutched at Peter's wrist as she noticed how the boy took a step forward, threatening to come out of the little hiding place Harper had led them to.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going to save my sister." Peter answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"If you go in there, Ophelia will kill you. That's why she sent Dorian after you."

A few days earlier Dorian had appeared in Salem, on a mission to kill the young Holloway. It was the sudden appearance of Harper that had kept the demon from finding him. It had been a very bizarre situation, especially for Peter, who despite knowing a lot about supernatural beings, couldn't remember any with the power of teleportation. And that's what Harper had used to get them out of Salem and now to get them to that street in New Harmony, Indiana.

Carter found Dorian a few moments later. The demon was still looking for Peter around Maddie's empty house, so Carter had assumed that by catching him, his little brother and the girl were safe. And so he'd let Dean know when he called him.

"I don't mind. At least this way, she will be okay." Peter declared firmly.

"Do you think your sister will be okay if you die in front of her? If you die in general?" Maddie looked at him in disbelief.

"At least she'll be alive."

"Very different things." Harper muttered to herself, but Peter was still able to hear her.

"Oh, really?" He looked back at her. "I have a better idea. Why don't you use your wonderful powers and save her?" Clenching his fists until his knuckles were completely white, Peter approaches the young redhead. "What are you by the way? If you don't mind sharing. I think after those two little trips Maddie and I deserve to at least know that much."

"I..." Harper began in a shaky voice. "I was sent to save your sister and protect you."

"Sent by whom?"

Harper opened her mouth to answer, but before her voice could leave her throat the echo of a body falling to the ground caught the attention of the three of them.

At one of the ends of the street Carter stood over Dorian's body. The demon-killing knife stuck in the demon's abdomen, the inside of which flickered several times until its life came to an end.

Ophelia seemed unaffected by this, but she did seem to be struck by the strong burst of light coming from inside one of the houses to her right. Carter and you also looked in its direction, the latter one with tears in her eyes.

"Dean." You whispered with a thread of a voice full of pain and sadness.

That beam of light was the same thing that had hit the Colorado police station after you left. It was the exact same beam that had killed Agent Henriksen and Nancy.

Then, suddenly, before the tears left your eyes and descended down your cheeks, you closed your eyes for a few moments and when you opened them, something had changed in them. Peter and Maddie could barely notice it, but because of their proximity, Henry, Carter and Ophelia witnessed it perfectly.

It was as if you were no longer human. All sparkle of life had disappeared from your eyes and turned to complete darkness. In the blink of an eye your eyes turned completely and utterly white.

"Lilith." Ophelia recognized her instantly, drawing the complete and total attention of the demon that now possessed your body.

"Ophelia." Lilith replied, tilting her head. "It's good to see you."

A shiver ran down Henry, Peter and Carter's spine at how cold your voice sounded.

Swallowing hard, Ophelia didn't waste any time before running the knife blade across Henry's neck, dropping his body as she began to run away from who was the first demon of them all. No one had ever had seen Ophelia as scared as she was now.

Carter could barely process what was happening in front of him. How had Lilith possessed you when you had an anti-possession tattoo on you? That question couldn't be answered, for as quickly as she had entered your body, Lilith left it, disappearing into the darkness of the night.

"Dad!" Peter ran past him. His knees hit the road as he reached his father's side. Tears covered his bright blue eyes as his trembling hands tried to stop the blood pouring from his neck.

Emerging from their hiding place, Harper ran over to Dorian's body at Carter's feet with a mixture of emotions reflecting in her eyes. Maddie had noticed that change almost instantly. As soon as Lilith had left your body, something had changed in the young redhead.

With different questions and thoughts swirling in your head, your shared a quick look with Carter and Maddie before shooting a glance at Harper and then turning to your father and little brother. However, the one you were really worried about at the moment was not them, but Dean.

With your body and mind still dazed from Lillith's possession and the tattoo burning on the back of your neck, you ran towards the house where the explosion of light had come from. You weren't even able to hear Maddie and Bobby's voice calling your name. It all sounded so far away, as if from another world. And when your eyes fell on the figure of Sam holding the lifeless body of his older brother, everything went silent. Your heart stopped in your chest, your tears began to wet your cheeks and your legs lost what little strength they had left, causing you to fall to your knees on the floor of that house.

As you stared at Dean's lifeless body in the arms of his younger brother, a chill ran down your spine. Your mind and heart were filled with a mixture of shock, horror, and sadness. You couldn't believe what you were seeing, yet it was happening right in front of your eyes. You felt powerless, the weight of the world upon your shoulders, and all the energy and hope drained out of you. It was as if everything you had been fighting for, everything that had kept you going, was gone in an instant. Your body trembled, your eyes stung with tears, and you couldn't help but let out a choked sob.

But as seconds passed it was as if a switch flipped in your mind, and a sense of numbness washed over you in the face of such a profound trauma. The sight was too much to bear. Your mind and body seemed to function on autopilot, as if you were watching the scene from a glass wall. Your eyes registered the pain, grief, and utter despair on Sam's face, but your own heart seemed strangely numb. It was as if your mind had shut down, unable to process the magnitude of the loss and resorting to a kind of disconnection as a defense mechanism.

You almost didn't even notice Bobby coming to your side, his grip firm on your shoulders as he helped you to your feet. You allowed yourself to be led outside, your mind and body feeling heavy and unresponsive.

Once seated in the passenger seat of Bobby's car, your tears dried on your cheeks, and you stared ahead vacantly. The silence in the car was deafening, and the only sounds were the distant sirens of the approaching ambulance and the murmur of voices outside. You could hear Bobby speaking to Sam in low tones, and the occasional murmur of Sam's response, but you couldn't make out the words.

The ride to the hospital seemed interminable, and when you finally arrived, you allowed Maddie and Bobby to lead you inside.

The waiting room felt cold, almost like a purgatory, as you took a seat on one of the uncomfortable chairs, your gaze dropping to the floor. Because it was so late at night, the room was practically empty, far from the shouts of doctors and nurses, the crying of patients and their families, which normally filled it during the day. You were grateful for that.

As time passed, you found yourself lost in thought, alternating between replaying the events over and over and wondering about your father's condition.

You sat there in silence, your mind unable to grasp the reality of what had happened. The sight of Sam and Bobby carrying Dean's lifeless body into the Impala replayed in your mind, each time bringing with it a fresh wave of grief and despair. It was as if your mind and heart were struggling to process the loss, and were instead fixating on mundane details, desperate for some kind of relief.

Eventually, a doctor entered the waiting room, his scrubs stained with blood and his face expression serious. You looked up, your eyes meeting the doctor's, and you braced yourself for the worst. The doctor looked around the room, his eyes settling on Peter, Maddie and you.

"Are you Henry Holloway's family?"

You nodded, unable to speak.

"Yeah. That's us." Maddie answered for you.

The doctor approached you, his expression neutral but not giving anything away.

"I'm Dr. Moore." The doctor said, his voice soft but firm. "I'm the doctor who treated him."

You swallowed, your throat dry as you managed to speak.

"How is he?"

Dr. Moore sat down next to you, his expression becoming more sympathetic. "He is stable, but he's lost a lot of blood, and he's still unconscious. We were able to stop the bleeding and repair the damage on his neck." He explained. "We're going to keep him sedated for now, to give his body a chance to heal."

You let out a shaky breath, a mix of relief and anxiety coursing through you. You had been dreading the worst, and the fact that your father was alive was a small light in the darkness.

"Can we see him?" Peter asked with a hopeful tone.

The doctor nodded, before guiding Maddie and him towards the room. You, however, just stood there, trying to process everything and waiting for Bobby to come back. Yet it wasn't Bobby who walked through the emergency room door, but Sam.

He knew that he had to see you. The sight of your tears and the look of devastation on your face had stayed with him, and he couldn't shake the feeling that he had to do something.

He found you standing in the waiting room. Your face pale and your eyes red from the tears.

Sam said your name softly, his voice barely above a whisper. You turned to look at him, your eyes widening as if you didn't expect to see him.

Sam took a step forward, closing the distance between you. He held out is hand, opening it to show Dean's amulet clutched tightly in his fist.

"I thought you should have this." He said quietly. "He would want you to have it."

You took the amulet gently, your fingers trembling slightly. You looked down at it, tracing the intricate carving with your fingertips.

You knew how special that amulet was to Dean. A young Sam had given it to him one Christmas where John had left them alone in a motel room. You could still remember Dean's voice as he told you the story a few months ago during the one and only Christmas you had spent together.

Tears welled in your eyes once again, but you tried to hold them back. A part of you wanted to refuse to accept it, knowing that it was important to Sam too, but the other part, the bigger part, was telling you to cling to it like a lifeline, knowing that was the only thing you had left form Dean.

"Thank you." You said, your voice choked with emotion.

Sam could tell you were struggling to hold yourself together, your grief and shock starting to catch up to you. He reached out, placing a comforting hand on you shoulder.

You looked up at him.

"I'm so sorry, Sammy. I should be the one comforting you, not the other way around."

"It's okay." He reassured.

"No, it's not. None of this is okay." You said, sitting back in that uncomfortable chair.

Sam let out a sigh. He didn't know what to say or do. He had truly believed he was going to save his brother and now that he was on his own all he could do was hold your hand and stay by your side.

Keep Reading: act ii (season 4) — in the beginning

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[kryptid-writes]

Chapter 7 - Secrets Secrets Are No Fun

Coping with the new development of wings, Y/N must hide her secret from the Winchesters, but the veil falls during training when things get heated with Dean.

(2.2k)

TW: This chapter has to do with binding wings that may be viewed as similar to chest binding. If you practice chest binding, please do so safely my friends. <3

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“Disgusting.” I mutter under my breath, gazing at my back, topless in the mirror. 

The little protrusions between my shoulder blades have doubled in size since the morning light just hours ago. Reaching nearly 6 inches in length, they adorn sporadic white feathers with a golden glamor sprouting from the bone. They look frail and weak, like the feathers of a baby bird, but without a doubt, they were undeniably the early stages of wing growth. 

A single tear rolls down my cheek as I'm unable to control the rush of emotions, frustration, sadness, disgust tearing me apart from the inside out. 

This is wrong. This is all so wrong! Why me? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!

My thoughts run a thousand miles per hour, clattering around in my brain. However, the sound of knocking on the bathroom door quickly pulls me out of my head. 

“Hey, Y/N?” Sam’s sweet muffled voice comes through the other side of the door.

“Yeah, uh, just a minute,” I reply in a panicked tone, picking up my flannel from the floor and wrapping it around my body. Unsurprisingly, the flannel did little to disguise the problem,  the fabric stretching and poking out awkwardly around the appendages. 

Great. The last thing I need right now is the Winchesters to see the freak show that is my newly sprouted wings.

“Dean and I wanna talk to you when you have a minute.”

“Sure thing!” I put on a fake chirpy voice, immediately cringing at how fake it sounds. I can practically feel Sam purse his lips and furrow his brow in reaction to my odd tone on the other side of the door.

“Right,” Sam clears his throat. His footsteps fade in the distance as he walks away. 

I let out a sigh of relief that doesn’t last long as I remember the problem at hand. There must be something in this bathroom I can use to conceal my little problem. I stumble over to the white cabinet on the wall that hangs just above the sink and fling the door open. The cabinet is practically barren with the exception of a half empty bottle of over the counter pain medication and a small plastic container with the words, FIRST AID, scribbled on it in sharpie. 

“Of course.” I say through gritted teeth, swiping the kit and slamming the cabinet shut. The flimsy white plastic cracks open under my touch, the contents spilling on the floor with a clatter. I drop to my knees, paying little mind to the bruise that will likely form from the impact, and rummage through the supplies around me. Gause, scissors, bandaids, needle, thread, and, “Hah!” I proudly exclaim as I grab the medical wrap from the pile.

Pushing myself up onto my feet and in front of the bathroom mirror, I unravel the tape and begin wrapping it around my wings. I struggle as they resist and flutter against the fabric. If they would just hold still, the process would go alot faster, and time is certainly of the essence. I bite my lip, swallowing down the pain from my sensitive wings crunching under the tape, painfully immobilized. After several wraps, I was finally satisfied and tore off the end of the bandage with my teeth, tucking it securely away. Although it wasn’t perfect, they were successfully binded flat against my back.

I pull my flannel back on, buttoning it all the way up and turn to the side to admire my work in the mirror. It’s still rather lumpy in the back, but not very noticeable unless you really squint.

I take a deep breath, regulating my emotions, wiping away the tears, and putting on my best poker face. I exit the bathroom, closing the door behind me with a quiet click.

------------------------------------------------------------

Sam and Dean sit in the library, each lost in their own worlds.

 Sam, lounging in a chair, thumbing through the pages of an old biblical book. 

Dean sits on the table, a leg resting on the arm of Sam's chair as he repeatedly sharpens a long silver blade.

“So, what did you want to talk to me about?” I ask, grabbing their attention. I fold my hands behind my back, slowly rocking back and forth from the pads to the heels of my feet, trying to calm my nerves.

“Well, we’ve been talking it over and we think it’s best to give you some training. You need to be prepared for what’s to come.” Sam gives a reassuring smile.

“Kick the devil's ass and send him back to his maker,” Dean chuckles, playfully pointing the blade in my direction.

“Oh.” I scratch the back of my neck, conflicted at the idea of assassinating the man I have developed mixed feelings for, but also excited to learn some self defense. “What did you have in mind?”

“Well, Sammy here can teach you how to exorcize demons. You can bet your ass there will be dozens guarding Lucifer. And me? I’m gonna teach you how to gank that feathery son of a bitch.” He turns the blade in his hand and plunges it into the wood of the table. It wobbles slightly before falling perfectly still.

“Okay...” Is all I can say as I struggle to process the information. 

I have no problem with exorcizing demons, the less that crawls this earth, the better. But Lucifer? Sure, I hate his guts for completely uprooting my life and turning me into some hybrid angel freak, but do I really want him dead?

The brothers give me an odd look, clearly expecting a different kind of response.

“So, where do we start?” I smile, trying to save the awkward interaction.

“I figure we start with some simple exorcism incantations.” Sam jumps up from his seat, rummaging in his jeans pocket for a folded piece of scrap paper. “This is your study guide.” He hands the slip to me.

I unfold it and written in neat handwriting is a series of Latin words. Beneath each word is the phonetic pronunciation, which is quite helpful considering I don’t know the first thing about reading Latin. I stare at the hefty paragraph, feeling rather intimidated.

“Don’t worry, I’m gonna help you,” he reassures me.

I give him a polite nod and a quick smile, trying my best to stow away my doubt.

“Repeat after me, Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus,” he says, slow and clear, making sure to over pronounce each syllable. 

“Exorcizamu… Exorcizamus te omnis immu… Immundus spiritus,” I repeat, butchering almost every word. I stare at the paper, replaying each word over and over in my head til it sticks. “ Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus,” I say with confidence, smiling at my correct pronunciation.

“Excellent!” He smiles, squeezing my arm with pride.

For nearly 2 hours, Sam and I read through the incantation over a dozen times until I have the pronunciation of every word down to a T. Although my brain feels fried, I can’t help but glow with pride at my improvement and Sam's relentless praises.

“Alright, I think you deserve a break for today, but I want you to practice this as much as you can. This is very important,” Sam says, clasping his hands together.

“You got it big guy,” I reply playfully.

 He gives me a disapproving look at the nickname, but smiles as he turns his head and walks away.

------------------------------------------------------------

“Alright sweetheart, you ready for some real training?” Dean says gleefully, raising his eyebrows in question.

“Born ready,” I reply with a grin, looking around the training room he had led me to.

 The walls and floor are covered in thick black padding, the fabric worn and torn in certain places. Scattered throughout the room are half a dozen training dummies, many of them riddled with stab wounds and bullet holes. An array of weights and weapons are displayed along benches and tables in an orderly fashion.

He picks up the largest blade from the table and strolls over til he’s about a foot from in front of me. 

“This here is an angel blade.” He turns the long dagger in his hands, the light dazzling off the reflective metal. “This is the only thing that can kill an angel.” He looks me in the eyes, very serious this time.

My eyes fall from his to the angel blade in his calloused hands. Anxiety and doubt plague my mind, but I swallow down my emotions and nod in understanding.

He flips the blade with ease, passing it to me with the handle end exposed. 

I take it from his grasp, the metal still warm from his body heat. It feels heavy and powerful in my hand. I’ve carried a pocket knife with me for years in self defense, having only had to use it once when some drunk guy at a bar followed me to my car, but nothing compared to a weapon like this. 

He steps behind me and wraps his hand around mine, moving my fingers to the correct placement. “Your grip on the handle is very important.” He gives my hand a light squeeze. “These fingers need to be wrapped around one side of the handle and your thumb should be pressed against the other side,” he explains. “Grip it tight.”

I do as I'm told, feeling my grip strengthen, pleasantly surprised at the difference.

“Good,” he praises. 

I can feel his warm breath on my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. He guides me to the dummy in front of us, stopping when we're all but 6 inches away.

“Now, I’m gonna teach you how to wield it, okay?” He says in a deep voice. 

“Yes, Dean,” I reply in a hushed tone. Butterflies flutter around my stomach.

He steps closer, til he’s barely an inch behind me. He wraps his warm hands around mine and I can’t help but close my eyes and relish the feeling.

“Okay, you’re gonna bring your arm back to your side, bending the elbow,” he says, pulling my arm back. 

We stay there for a minute, just savoring the moment. The tension in the room is thick, but far from unpleasant.

“Now you’re gonna use the momentum of your body to push it forward.” 

Following his directions, I force the blade forward in one swift movement.

“Straighten your elbow sweetheart,” he purrs in my ear. 

I briefly close my eyes, trying to fight the heat rising in my body, and do as he says. The sound of the blade cutting through the air breaks the silence.

“Good job,” he praises. “Okay, when you’re attacking, you’re going to want to aim right here.” He points his finger to a spot on the dummy just below the sternum, where the vital organs are most exposed.

I nod, focusing on each of his words. 

He guides my hand back, then up, just as we practiced, plunging the blade right under the rib cage until it’s buried deep inside. 

I can’t hold back the gasp that falls from my lips.

“Good, very good!” He spins me around to face him. “See you’re a natural,” he chuckles. “A little more practice with me and you’ll be a pro,” Dean winks.

“What can I say? I learn from the best.” I blush with a smile.

He thoughtfully tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, his eyes flicking back and forth between my own adoring eyes and my lips.

 I can’t help but return his interest. 

He leans in close, pressing his forehead to mine. 

My heart swells, as my pulse quickens. I hold my breath, waiting for his next move.

He leans in and ever so slightly presses his lips to mine, silently asking for my permission.

I close my eyes and lean in, claiming his lips with mine. 

Our lips move together in harmony like they are made for eachother. The kiss is soft and loving, as if we are just testing the waters, and my god it just feels so right. 

I sigh with content into his mouth as he places his hand on the small of my back, pulling our bodies together. I feel lost in the moment, wishing it would never end as his hands slowly travel up further until it reaches my bandaged wings poorly disguised under my flannel. 

He pulls back slightly, now looking at me with a mix of confusion and concern.

My eyes shoot open and my breath hitches in my throat as I realize what’s happening. The euphoric high of finally kissing Dean fades and the horror of his discovery, sits in my stomach like a ball of lead.

“Wha-,” he starts to ask.

Before he can utter the word, I forcefully push him away and rush out of the room. The world becomes muddy as my eyes blur with hot tears. I run and run until I reach my quarters and throw myself into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I toss the angel blade aside, not even registering the loud clatter of metal meeting tiles and sink to the ground, pulling my knees into my chest, not even bothering to fight the sobs that rack my body.

Series Masterlist

Full Masterlist

[v3nusxsky]

for the smut prompts number 3 pls i’ll love you forever🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Wildest dreams 18+

*Authors note~ happy Halloween guys! I would like to thank you all for following along with my first ever Kinktober! Enjoy guys, also @prettybuckybaby you should love me forever bc I added Bucky :)*

Trigger warnings~ Mistress kink daddy kink mommy kink sir kink? Oral sex sex toys Bucky x r, Larissa x r, lesso x r, Natasha x r, lesso x Wanda (punishment only) bondage blindfolds humiliation? Praise kink degrading kink Voyeurism, r getting shared around um smut ? Idk if it’s in need of anymore warnings

Prompt~ see ask

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

“Leo! I’m sorry” you whined as the fiery red head continued to fix your bindings and place the extra thick blindfold over your eyes. “I simply don’t care Kitten, you earned this so you’ll shut up and take it like a pretty Kitty for your Mistress, or I’ll just cancel your surprise” she threatened making sure to attach the little vibe to your aching clit. “I’m sorry please, Leo I’ll be a good girl” you promised, but you both knew that it was an empty promise. When you get bored you tend to become bratty, and that was something Lesso loved. Putting her pretty Kitten back in her place was great stress relief. However, it being Halloween the Dean had a surprise lined up, but you’d have to take the punishment first.

Flicking the vibe on Lesso just watched as you thrashed against the bindings, “oh dear! I must have set it to high, my mistake” she taunted watching how your body was forced to be still. Your pleas and empty promises flowing from your mouth like a river had the red head desperately dipping a hand into her underwear to tease herself. “Quiet kitten, or you’ll not get to hear how turned on your Mistress is for you” was all that was needed to have you biting your lower lip to try and silence yourself. Being rewarded with her whimpers and groans of pleasure had your poor core practically leaking with need.

Leonora must have took pity on you as she turned the vibe off throwing it somewhere around the room before straddling your thigh. “You don’t mind if Mistress uses you kitten do you? You’ve got me awfully turned on, and it’s only right you fix it isn’t it? You wanna make me feel good right?” Her words we murmured right down your ear as you immediately agreed begging her to use you and take what she wants. Anything for her pleasure. “I just want to be a good Kitten for you, please let me help” you whined as the redhead began to rut her hips against your thigh, her panties adding the extra stimulation, aiding her to get to that edge faster, after all she is on a time crunch.

“I wanna hear your beg, beg for your Mistress to cover you in my cum, beg for me sweet girl” she groaned coming closer to the edge, but wanting to hear you say how badly you need her to cum. And that you did, like a good kitten you begged and pleaded until her warm cum was spread over your thigh. Moving off your thigh the red head informed you your guests of honour had arrived. “Leo? Guests? What’s happening Leo?” You whimpered only to be silenced with a kiss. “Ahh sweet girl, I read your book, and decided as a special treat to find these people. You took your punishment now here’s the next part. Let’s great them shall we?”

You lost count of how many people had now joined the room but by the gasps of want and desire you could tell this would be interesting. Your body bound and littered in your lovers marks was on full display now leaving your curiosity to run absolutely wild. “She’s a free slut for you all, nothing is off limits apart from her cumming. Her safe words is the traffic light system and a fist if she can’t freely talk, have fun” the red head command before growling “You however know what to do.”

Lesso had found your note book of pure porn without plot, a book featuring a variety of people that you knew didn’t even know of your existence. It was flattering really, you included her in every single story you wrote and she just knew she had to treat you to this. Something not even your wildest dreams would comprehend. After all it wasn’t hard to locate the Realms of these people.

Larissa was first, The schools for Goof and Evil having worked together recently meant she was already familiar with Lesso’s pet and was more than happy to play along, she found you rather adorable and well fuckable. Lesso explained your stories and Larissa immediately recognised what her students were calling “fanficton” that she had confiscated from some of the older students of Nevermore.

It was decided Larissa would play with you first, after all she has Nevermore to run. So it was no surprise to anyone really that Larissa crawled up your body to litter it with kisses of her own, praises flowing freely as she took in your body. “Such a pretty girl, mommy wants to sit on your face darling” she murmured before nipping at your neck. “Mistress?” You whimpered looking for the okay only to be treated with a harsh smack to your thigh, “do as your told kitten, don’t keep mommy waiting little slut.”

Larissa’s pillow like thighs settled either side of your head as she lowered her now exposed cunt to your awaiting tongue. “Oh good girl, such a good little girl” Larissa murmured as she began to grind her hips down against your mouth. “Pretty girl, they are all watching your pretty pussy flutter around nothing, you’re so good darling” Larissa mewled as you sucked on her clit forcing her to her orgasm quicker than she would’ve liked. “Fuck! Good fucking girl, right there Y/n. Oh fuck Leo she’s so perfect” Larissa complimented as she drenched your face in her juices. You carefully brought the woman back down so she could climb off your face and steal a kiss. She immediately took control and forced her tongue into your mouth effectively tasting herself on your tongue. “Mm so fucking sweet pretty girl, until the next time” she murmured leaving a kiss on your cheek before finding her original spot.

“Mistress, thank you-“ you whimpered but were cut off by the bed dipping by your bound foot. “Gonna be good doll?” A male voice sounded the room and you instantly knew who it was. “B-buck?” You whimpered causing Leonora to laugh, “oh kitten, you weren’t this shy in your stories, go ahead Bucky, fuck her.” See there was no need to get you ready, Larissa and lesso had done a good enough job of that and well, Bucky would be lying if he said he hadn’t been lazily stroking her hard cock to the sight of you being a whore. It was a massive turn on. Making quick work of applying a condom he settled himself between your spread legs. “Ready for me dolly?”

Lining himself up with your awaiting core he immediately slipped in, you letting out whimpers, a mix of pain and pleasure, at the stretch. “God Dolly you’re so tight! Does Mistress not fuck you well enough? Hmm?” He taunted setting a slow and steady rhythm. “You just needed Sir’s cock hmm? Lesso, look how cock dumb she is for me, might want to be carful or I’ll take the slut back with me.”

“Watch it Barnes” lesso growled, she was all for it, watching you be shared around, but you are hers. And that was clear. “Mistress is best- fuck oh god I - at fucking me” you attempted to get out amongst the moans he was pulling from you, the bulbous head of his dick bumping against your cervix, “Mistress, close please! Can I” you whimpered hoping she would take pity on you. “Pull out Bucky, she isn’t to cum” Lesso damned only to be met with a disgruntled noise from Bucky as he did as he was asked. There he stripped the rubber from his painful hard dick before crawling up the bed.

From there he got a good look at you, desperate and pouting at the denial. The feeling of his cock rubbing at your lips had you gasping in shock, just before he thrusted himself down your throat. “Suck on it dolly” he demanded as he fucked your face, forcing you to swallow every last drop of cum. Tears now leaked from the blindfold as you coughed and spluttered around his pulsating member. “Fucking whore likes choking on cock, I wonder” he panted pulling out from your swollen lips to place his large hands around your throat, “you look so much better with my hands around your throat doll.”

Bucky soon left the room leaving you so fucking desperate and yet no clue what would happen to you now. That’s when you heard the Russian accent. “Oh she’s so pretty, wands what are you doing” the Russian spat causing Wanda to whimper, fuck she’d been caught. Although they were here to play with you she was still very much Natasha’s submissive and this was her reward. One that she’d just lost. “Leonora, could you deal with that needy bitch of mine while I fuck this sweetheart to high heaven?” Oh fuck no, you struggled to free yourself from the bindings, Leonora is yours and you couldn’t get to her, Wanda being free and touchable had lesso agreeing knowing she was setting off your jealous rage.

Natasha’s black widow skills came in use as she skilfully undid the bindings to reposition you and quickly tied you back up. This time the blind fold was removed and you had full access to watch Wanda being caned by your lover as Natasha slotted herself underneath you and quickly entered you with one swift thrust of her faux cock. “Oh Dekta you’re still so tight even after all of that? Oh you poor girl, must wanna cum for daddy hmm?” The redheads taunting combined with the speed her thrusts and the hits Wanda was receiving was dizzying, you could see the other avenger beg for mercy and you knew how that would fall on deaf ears. “Daddy” Wanda sobbed causing Leonora to growl, “daddy is busy, it’s Mistress you should be focused on or are you that much of a slut all you can think about is daddy fucking my Kitten over there” lesso was never one to mince her words and it was clear that she was getting just as much power from punishing Wanda as Natasha was from punishing you. “Mistress. I’m close please please let me cum” you whimpered taking Natasha’s brutal thrusts. “So sensitive no more please.”

“Oh you’ll fucking take what daddy gives you my precious girl” she grunted giving you one harsh thrust before pulling you off her strap and calling over Wanda, “come here pup, she made a mess of my cock.” Wanda immediately crawling over to her lover and taking the strap deep in her throat moaning at the taste of your slick that was covering it. You were too far gone into your sub space to even register the rest, the need to have an orgasm being painfully obvious now.

Somehow, somewhere Natasha and Wanda left, Lesso informing you everyone but Larissa was staying over at the school for Evil tonight, but you weren’t leaving this room, they’d had their fun and she had hers, that was all that mattered. Undoing you from the bindings, the red head laid you on to the bed and subtly grabbed the small vibe from earlier and attached it to your overly sensitive clit. From there she decided to change her plan, the tears stained on your face were enough of a punishment so she situated herself so that she too could rut against the small vibrating toy.

“Mistress please please i need” you whined in coherently only to be silenced by a deep hungry kiss and the command to cum over her cunt. And that’s exactly what you did. You’d never came so hard in your life, drenching Lesso in cum as you squirted so hard you passed out from the pure pleasure. Seeing that had Lesso over the edge, she was now sensitive from teasing her self while the others fucked you, and truly she could see you all being friends. Maybe a repeat in the near future but for now she settled on cleaning you up and magically changing the sheets before bringing your unconscious body to lay on her chest.

Hands trailing through your hair as she cooed words of love and praise waiting for you to come back to her. “Come on sweet girl, come back to me my love.” You whimpered as the first thing you registered was your overstimulated pussy and the second being Leo. “Mmm did okay?” You mumbled, she knew the ways you were after a particularly fun night so she had everything ready. “So good sweetheart, come on have some water and then we can cuddle okay? You did so good and I’m so proud of how you handled your treat.” Drinking your water with simple encouragement and lots of praise you soon found yourself snuggled into your lover and sleepily mumbling, “m sorry you found the book and tonight but im only yours. I love you Leo” before promptly slipping back into the land of slumber

Word count 2252

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[shanastoryteller]

let the beltane fires burn

The Halliwells are descended from Melinda Warren, are the branch in which the greatest power resides, the line that would birth the most powerful witches to walk the earth.

It's not the only line.

Deanna knows about hunters, knows what they don’t know and don’t understand and that they killed her family. But Samuel didn’t kill her family. Samuel’s a good man who saves innocents, the same way she was raised to, if not how she was raised to do it.

She’s all alone. It’s not safe to be a witch.

The day before her wedding, she binds her powers.

When Mary is a year and a day, she does the same to her. It’s safer this way. Better. The world is so unkind to witches, even ones like them, born into it, with their power baked into their blood. Better to fight evil with bullets and knives than the strange terrible thing she’s destined to give her daughter, that her daughter is destined to pass along to her own daughters.

She never tells Samuel. There’s no reason to.

When Mary is old enough, when she’s talking of running and rebelling and all those things Samuel thinks will never come to pass and Deanna knows almost certainly will – running and rebelling is in her blood as surely as the magic, but there’s no binding potion for that – she tells her daughter what they are. What she’ll have to do to keep her future daughters safe, if she has them. It’s the only potion she ever teaches Mary how to brew, the only one she’ll ever need.

The day after Dean’s first birthday, Marry brews the potion and feeds it to him. He cries more after, doesn’t settle as quickly, and John worries and Mary reassures him and tells herself she’s done the right thing. Whatever it is that Dean feels he’s lost, he’s better off without it. She’s going to be normal. Her children are going to be normal.

She intends to do the same for Sammy, but she burns above his crib when he’s six months old.

~

John sees Sammy levitate a toy towards him when he’s two years old and shouts so loudly that he drops it, tears running down his face and wailing in the face of his father’s anger. Dean comes running from the other room and reaches for Sammy, letting his brother’s chubby fingers tangle in his shirt. “What’s wrong?” he asks, eyes wide.

He doesn’t answer, rubbing his hand over his face and heart pounding in his chest.

What did that demon do to his son?

What did it turn him into?

Is Sammy even human anymore?

He doesn’t react to salt, to holy water, to silver. John loses his temper every time something moves inexplicably and eventually it stops, by the time Sam’s in kindergarten he’s just like all the other kids.

John watches, fear and suspicion and something uglier caught up inside of him.

What is his son?

~

Sam figures out young that he’s a freak.

Dad and Dean just think he’s weak, just think he has nightmares, and he lets them. He only practices the telekinesis when he’s alone and every time he almost gathers the courage to tell his brother or father about it, to finally come clean, he’s viciously reminded how much they hate the things they hunt, how they’d never accept it, accept him, and as soon as he tells them what he is, he’ll lose them.

He doesn’t know what he is, really. Only that he’s not normal.

Eventually he stops seeing things in his sleep, instead getting them when he’s awake, more vivid and real than the monsters that plague his dreams. He sees people being hurt, people who need help, and it goes against everything he’s been taught to leave them to their fate.

But how can he explain it to his family? He can’t.

He’s thirteen the first time he sneaks out and saves a woman from one of his visions, finding her in the dark alley he’d seen her die in. He puts a bullet in the man’s chest, but it barely stops him, and then she and him both are getting a fireball thrown at them.

Sam shoves his hand in front of him, pushing back against the heat, refusing to die the same way his mother died.

The fireball returns to the man, catching him in the chest and he screams, disappearing into the fire until he’s nothing more than a smudge on the ground.

“Wow,” the woman breathes. Sam turns to her, trying to come up with some sort of explanation, when she continues, “I’ve never met a witch with active powers before.”

“I’m not a witch,” he says automatically, thinking of bargains made with demons, of hex bags and rotting meat and blood sacrificed.

She looks between him and the smudge on the ground incredulously. “Are you sure about that?”

Yes. No.

He doesn’t know what he is.

She leads him back to her apartment, stacks books into hix arms, and then makes him a sandwich when his stomach rumbles. His age worries her, his ignorance worries her even more, and everything she’s saying sounds like kooky new age bullshit except for the way that it explains everything he’s never been able to.

There are witches and demons and monsters nothing like anything his father’s ever talked about.

~

It’s easy to research, at least, because his dad thinks there’s a kernel of truth in every piece of supernatural bullshit. Dean makes fun of him for digging into girly, feel-good crap rather than the harder stuff, but his dad just seems relieved he’s taking an interest all. Sam starts taking notes, keeps them all in a folder until Dad buys him a journal, patting his back when he hands it over like it’s a rite of passage.

To Dad, it’s his first hunting journal.

Sam runs his hand down the soft leather spine and knows he’s starting his book of shadows.

The visions don’t stop. He saves more innocents, some witches and some mortal, and keeps the record of all the creatures he’s killed in Latin to discourage Dad and Dean from snooping. He uses his telekinesis on hunts only when there’s no other option, only when there’s someone’s life on the line, and he’s as careful as he can be not to get caught.

It should be a relief, to find out there are other people like him, to know that he’s a force for good in the world.

There’s no way he can explain the existence of a different type of witches to his father without putting a target on their backs.

Some witches have been targeted by hunters, ones who were trying to help but got caught in the crossfire, ones that had turned evil and needed to be stopped, but it’s not often he finds a witch that regards hunters with anything but fear. At least when his family are the ones sniffing around, he can give them a heads up, can tell them how to avoid their attention.

He’s had a lot of practice, after all.

~

Sam is sixteen when he’s a little too slow.

The innocent is safe and the demon is killed, but his chest is torn open and he’s bleeding out on the pavement.

“Oh no, oh no,” the woman he’d saved chants, pressing her hands against him, even though it’s pointless, even though it just sends a bolt of pain through him. Fuck. He doesn’t want to die. Dean is going to devastated. “Paige! Help me! Paige!”

There’s a bright light in the corner of his eyes and an woman around his dad’s age with bright hair red hair is leaning over him.

Then she touches him, but her touch doesn’t hurt.

He looks down and the wound on his chest closes, skin clear and unharmed, pain retreating to only a memory.

“He saved me,” the woman says. “He can move things!”

The redhead’s eyebrows rise. “You have active powers?”

They’re always so surprised by that. Sam’s more impressed with the fact that she just healed him. “I get premonitions too. What are you?”

“You get,” she starts then cuts herself off. “Where’s your whitelighter?”

He stares. “My what?”

She raises a hand to her head and groans. “Oh, someone’s really messed up somewhere. Leo!”

~

Guardian angels are real, called whitelighters, and apparently witches with active powers who go around saving innocents are supposed to have them to help keep them from getting themselves killed in the process.

Leo, who’s something called an elder with a kind face, says an unconventional witch deserves an unconventional whitelighter.

Chris Halliwell is his age, half witch, and also has telekinesis.

Oh, and he’s apparently his cousin. His very, very, very distant cousin.

“Are all witches related?” he asks incredulously.

“No,” Chris says, long dark hair and hazel eyes doing more to aid his claim of family than the spell his mother had cast. He and Chris look more related than him and Dean do. “We’d thought all the other branches of the Warren line had died out. You’re a surprise.”

Great. He’s a freak even among witches.

~

It’s so much easier now that he’s not desperately trying to piece together everything on his own, with only the occasional help from the innocents he saves. Chris is sarcastic and annoying and funny and more than having a guardian angel, Sam’s relieved to just have a friend he doesn’t have to lie to for once.

The Halliwell house, with its potion ingredients and powerful witches and home cooking, is only an orb away. He mostly hangs out with Chris, of course, but Piper always invites him to stay for dinner and Paige checks in on him, feeling somewhat responsible for him since she met him first, and Wyatt’s friendly enough but Chris sends him packing whenever Sam’s there.

He’s pulling doubletime when it comes to saving innocents, doing it as a witch and as a hunter, and he’s still maintaining straight As on top of it all while lying about half his life to his father and brother. It’s a stack of cards that’s bound to fall apart.

Going to Stanford is about more than just escaping his father.

It gets him close enough to San Francisco that he won’t need to be orbed to the Halliwells. It’s supposed to give him some breathing room, to let him focus on being a witch, to let him get his education. He does more good as a witch than as a hunter, but it’s not like that’s something he can explain to his family.

He’d wanted out, needed out, before he gets himself or someone else killed trying to balance it all. But he hadn’t thought his father would kick him out. He hadn’t thought Dean would let him.

He goes to the bus station but doesn’t buy a ticket. He calls Chris and spends the rest of the summer at Halliwell manor, burying all his hurt under training with Chris and saving people and getting ready to start college in September.

~

Jess wears a pentacle around her neck and keeps salt in small bowls in each of the cardinal directions and Sam doesn’t intend to tell her that he’s a witch, but when he ends up saving her from a darklighter attack, that decision is taken out of his hands. Coming clean about the hunter part takes longer, but it’s a bit of an easier sell once the knowledge of the supernatural is already out there. The thing that surprised her most of all is that things like bullets and steel can be used successfully against monsters, rather than the existence of monsters themselves.

Three years later when Dean shows up at their door, Sam can’t bring himself to deny him. It’s one weekend. He’d never wanted to lose his family in the first place.

When he returns home to Jessica pinned to the ceiling, he doesn’t even have to think.

He yanks her down, catching her in his arms just as fire effulges the place she’d been. He pushes the fire away from them, but it fights him harder than demonic fire usually does and leaves his hands burned and blistering. He doesn’t care. Jess is bleeding and in shock but still alive, breath rattling against him. “CHRIS!”

Dean’s yelling for him, but Sam can’t let him in. He throws his hand out, keeping his bedroom door closed even as his brother throws his body against it, still screaming his name.

Chris orbs in, eyes going huge. “Sam, what-”

“Heal her then go,” he snaps, the smoke already hurting his throat. “I’ll explain later.”

He puts his glowing hands over her bleeding stomach and the wound closes, her body going slack and her breathing easing even as her eyes roll back.

Sam tenses. “Is she-”

“Fine, let’s go, your hands,” Chris says, hands already glowing as he reaches for him.

“SAM!” Dean shouts, sounding like he’s about two seconds away from trying to shoot through the door.

“You can heal me later,” he says. “Thank you. Go.”

Chris shoots him a bitchy look that Paige says they share and then he orbs away. The fire’s covered almost the entire room now and Sam finally lets go of the door.

Dean stumbles in, pale, already reaching for him.

Sam stands and finds his knees buckling, gritting his teeth to keep himself upright. “Take her,” he says urgently, pressing Jess into his brother’s arms. “We have to go.”

“You think?” he snaps, but he’s gentle with Jess. Sam shoves him towards the door, slamming it behind him just as it surges after them. Keeping the flames from killing them is one of the hardest things he’s ever done. No wonder he’s exhausted.

They stumble downstairs, away from the fire, and someone’s already called the ambulance.

The story’s an easy sell because it’s not like anyone would believe the truth. They say Jess took sleeping pills and Sam came home to flames. He pulled Jess out and has the burns to prove it. Dean saw the flames in the window and went up, helping to get them both out.

It’s almost true.

“He had yellow eyes,” Jess tells him after. “He was – Sam, I’ve seen demons, I’ve fought demons. He’s something else.”

“Different kind of demons,” Sam says. There’s the underworld, and there’s hell. Underworld demons go after witches mostly. Hell demons go after mortals and are a lot harder to kill, ironically. “It’s the same demon that killed my mother, Jess, and now it’s after you. I have to take care of this.”

Dean’s too relieved about Sam’s determination to rejoin the hunt to question him too closely about all this. He knows better than to think that will last for very long.

Chris agrees to watch over Jess for him even though she’s not technically one of his charges. They layer protection spells on her, including one cast by the power of three, and even this yellow eyed demon will be hard pressed to break through that.

Hell demons are tricky. They’re not as susceptible to witch magic. But Sam’s not just a witch.

He’s a hunter too.

[whimsyfinny]

So this is a slightly different post - I'm actually writing a book (slowly) at the moment in between Dean Winchester fics. It's in the works and it probably won't get published as it's my first book, and I'd love to have some readers for my personal work. Soooo I guess what I'm asking is....

Sounds cliche af but I'm keeping it brief. If anyone has any other questions about it pls comment below or message. In all honesty I've not made up my mind to post it yet because I have no idea if anyone would even like it haha. But yeah lemme knowwww

[wordieworld-woo]

Some scars cant be healed

Alister x reader, mentioned/ suggested Dean x reader/Castiel x reader

Warning: Mentions of torture, violence canon to SPN, Reader being tortured, self doubt, manipulation

Word count: 745 - unedited (enjoy)

“How many times are you willing to die for them,” Alister sneered. His face in hers , his putrid breath lingering. Every nerve was telling her to run , get away from the demon that was going to torture her. He had said it himself, told her his plan of how he was going to tear her apart. Cut until nothing was left but blood and pain just like he had during her years in hell. How he planned to leave her suspended, barely able to touch the ground, bleeding and nearing death the more days that passed. He wanted her afraid, scared that her mortal life would be taken away, that she’d end up back where they met in hells torture dungeon. She refused to give him that satisfaction, knowing all too well of the pleasure he experienced from seeing her fear. 

She stared at the wall, ignoring his taunts and the torture, she stayed quiet as he integrated her avoided giving answers on the Winchesters or Castiel.  “Tell me little girl,” he circled where she was tied down. “How many times is it now?” he laughed. She held her resolve despite every instinct screaming to somehow put him into his place. “Bite me…” she said, lacing each word with venom, a final act of defiance. “You know what's funny,” he trailed his knife across her throat “how willing you are to die for them, and how little they care.” “I’ll  kill you… I swear,” she snarled. He stabbed his blade into her thigh laughing at the whine that escaped. He smiled at the grimaces and obvious pain she was experiencing, enjoying every second of discomfort she felt. He was only just getting started. 

Alister had been at it for hours, and as a master in his craft he was disappointed by what little information he had gotten out of her. How strong her resolve seemed to be. Though little did he know how close she was to breaking, how desperate she had become. That she had given up on Castiel and was praying to god himself to save her. To let her wake up in the arms of her angel, in the arms of Dean just wake up somewhere safe. But she didn’t. God wasn’t listening.  Alister was an ‘artist’ always trying new ways, methods of torment in order to get her to speak. To share her knowledge on the Winchesters. Though none of it seemed to work. 

“You’ve held together better than I expected,” Alister sang, as he circled her. Examining all the cuts, bruises, burns that had begun to heal, and the many others that were still open. “Where is their loyalty to you… Hmm” She stayed quiet, trying so desperately to ignore his words, and the weight that they carried. Avoiding the thoughts of what if, could he be, knowing too well where they could lead her. She decided that this would be the final time that she reached out to Castiel, that if still no answer came she would allow herself to agree, on what Alister had been saying. “They have none,” he sneered. “You’re just another stray they took in.”

“They don’t care about you.” 

A ruffle of wings. Then the anger filled voice of Dean answered “There you’re wrong,” he launched himself in Alister’s direction. She sighed relieved. Grateful that they had come to her rescue. While Dean fought against the Demon, Castiel was quick to release her of her bindings, and examine the exposed wounds. She could read the concern on Castiels face. The feeling of responsibility no doubtly felt as a result of her injuries. “I am sorry I couldn’t find you sooner,” Dean returned at her side, pulling her arm across his shoulders in order to support her weight. “How are you feeling, sweetheart,” Dean asked. His gaze fixed on the blood that covered her clothing. “I’ll live,” “I can only heal so much,” Castiel placed his palm to her head, his grace attaching itself to the more recent damage and stitching her back together. 

“Thank you,” 

“Let's get you home,” Dean swept her off her feet carrying her from the warehouse to Baby, Castiel following behind. Alister hadn’t succeeded in breaking her, but he had come close. Close to killing her, to getting the information he wanted. She was alive, and breathing in the safety of the people she trusted. But what he’d done had left scars. Perhaps even the kind that angels couldn’t heal.

[ananke-xiii]

i think you were being facetious about the osiris coffin myth but what do you think about that being called back to in season 14 with the michael coffin plan. im curious what your thoughts on that are.

Hello!

Oh, no I wasn't being facetious (I think you're referring to this post, right?)! As I've said there, this isn't my primary reading of those episodes and I definitely don't think the Osiris myth was planned in advance, not the way I've put it in my post.

But I do know that resurrection is too much of a big theme in s13 to be discarded as a "regular" SPN thing. Specifically, Cas' resurrection spans over 6 episodes (7 if you count his death in s12) where we actually see the steps of his resurrection, so I think it's safe to say that the writers revisited some resurrection myths to come up with ideas (I'm pretty sure every screenwriter has a copy of "The Writer's Journey: Mythic Structure For Writers" at home, which hopefully means they also have a copy of "The Hero with a Thousand Faces" which also means that they have a copy of "The Golden Bough" and Frazer was pretty keen on dying and rising gods).

Now, about the Malak Box which means the Angel Box. I have perhaps too many thoughts about it so I'll try to be brief and only share the most salient points.

The tl;dr version is that I personally think that the meaning of characters who (want to) bury things in the water is two-sided: they want to efface the proof of their actions but they also doom themselves in the process because water is the universal symbol of life, therefore the things we hide in the water won't stay dead and are bound to resurface.

Michael was trapped by Dean in an icebox which was all a big symbolic way to say that Dean trapped Michael deep down his subconscious. What's the most famous symbol connected to the subconscious? Water. So of course the icebox thingy doesn't work because see above: the things we bury in the water will resurface whether we like it or not.

Dean understands that and this is why he builds a box for himself: because he contains Michael in his mind but it's not enough and, since Michael will take control over his mind, Dean thinks that if he puts his own body into a box and hides it deep down the ocean the problem will be solved.

Per its usual, the show removes its characters from making real decisions so we don't know what would have happened if Dean had gone through with his plan. What I personally do know is that Dean's plan was doomed to fail because see above again: water=subconscious=things will resurface.

I also know it wouldn't have worked because previously on Supernatural other things buried deep in the ocean somehow found their way back home: the First Blade in s10 and Lucifer himself in s12.

What do the First Blade, Lucifer and Michael have in common? Well, according to SPN they are evil. So we go back to the idea that evil things can be kept apart if you manage to stuff them deep down the earth/water and far away from civilization. Which, again, doesn't work.

Interestingly, it's usually Michael the one who binds Lucifer to the "Abyss", therefore in SPN we have an inversion of the myth: Dean wants to cast Michael into the ocean while Nick wants to resurrect Lucifer from the Empty. Power to the vessels, yeah! (I think "Damaged Goods" went heavy on the metaphor 'cause we have Dean and the Malak box and Nick and that box thingy where Abraxas was caged).

Now I've written "Abyss" in quote/unquote because abyss, per se, means "bottomless" and it's not exclusively related to waters and oceans but it also very much is. Dean says he wants to bury himself in the Pacific Ocean so, to me, this means the Mariana Trench which might as well be the "personification" of the concept of the abyss.

So we have a very interesting thing here in that Dean is even more Michael-like than Michael himself because he wants to bury the both of them into the abyss. LOL.

Finally, since Malak means "angel" and Dean wants to bury himself in the ocean/Abyss I cannot not think of the "angel of the abyss" found in the Book of Revelation, aka Abaddon/Apollyon.

So we go back to the beginning of my reply: one thing Supernatural is not given enough credit for is that it made full use of both ancient and more modern myths and stories, sometimes not in a respectful way but some other times they were pretty clever with symbolism.

Besides the main characters being conventionally attractive white dudes, the show's success is, imo, due to the fact that it's about this stuff, you know? Once you start playing around with myths you'll always find people willing to listen.

[aloneatpeace]

In Another Universe

Chapter 22

My boys

Cas led them to the book they get to the underground and climb down the steps when Klaus look up, he sees the red glow “she is near “

They move fast as cas lock up the door

“Where that tunnel goes?” dean asks

“Under the river”

The opening of door causes them to look back to see you use your power to open the door you are limping blood all over, you eye glow red. Klaus try to fight you but Sam held him back “not now”.

“Go go go “dean yells

You blast the two tables away from your way limping your way towards them cas push the buttons on the side closing up the doors you blast one after another chasing after them they slow down after seeing you gone as cas pushed the last button. They stand glancing at door warily the water drip down the celling

“Where did she go?” America asks no one particular

Suddenly you appear out the side making them scared and America and dean to let out a scream your face had scars and bloody a horrifying sight it looks demonic almost “I warned you “

“Other y/n if you’re in there hold your breath “Klaus hit the ground hard with all his might causing the water to pour down

“Did you kill her?” dean asks him

“No, just brought us some time. “Klaus hastily said when they finally reach the last door to the book klaus rip open the door and they stand taking in the viewpoint.

The place beamed with magic, it’s like whole another colliding each other colorful and enchanting. Everything seem to floating and book was glowing from its stand on the floating floor. Klaus jump and lands safely dean and cas jump after him Sam glance at her.

“Come on kid, you got this “dean call her out from the down with a node from Sam she jumps and Sam after her.

“This is the gap junction the gap between universes “cas inform

Klaus eyes is trained on the book and turns to Sam “would you do the honor?”

Sam walks towards the book “alright book, give me what I need” everyone watch as Sam take the book and the glow dims. He carefully walks back towards them when suddenly America yelps when she was grabbed by the red energy.

You stand behind them drenched in water hand in Americas hair as she yelps surprised by the sudden attack Sam try to move but Klaus prevent him and speed towards you only to be thrown away and they get hit the book was caught the red energy and it’s turned into ash Infront of them.

 You bind them with red strings at the same time control America to go motion less. You slowly raise your fingers and manipulate her mind to open up the portal to the universe where you float with eyes closed on the sacrificial ground on the throne of wundagore, a chilling smile on your face when you see yourself calmly floating you push them inside.

They land on the floor harshly the four giants who was praying to you move as you open your eyes iris glowing red.

In earth 838 y/n lose her conscious and drop to the floor quickly she regains her conscious, taking rapid breathes her thoughts quickly went to her family

“My boys” looking around she sees she is not in her home and fly to door going back to her boys.

“y/n stop this there still time” Sam pleads you bind them again restricting them from doing anything and walk towards America

“This isn’t what your children would want” America 

That angered you as you lift her off the floor to the table, America pants and look at them “STOP IT” dean yell from the side. As they relentlessly try to break free.

Without giving them a glance, you circle the table and stand at side, behind Americas head “they’ll never know” you murmur

“Maybe not but you will” you falter a movement; the demons start to walk towards the entrance when Wong appears. You left them to deal with them. Wong use a conjured orange sword to fight off the giants, successfully killing them.

As he kills the last one you send a blast to him that he quickly turns and the blast hit the giant send it fall down the mountain.

 While you are fighting with Sam yells at America making her slowly open her eyes “America, you have to stop her”

“Yeah, kid use your power just like you did at the lab” dean encourage.

“But I can’t control it “tears filled her eyes

“Yes, you can “Klaus words surprised her as he was always bitter towards her “you have been all along every time opened a portal, you sent us exactly where we needed to go “

“But your family…everyone died”

“Yeah, but you still can save yourself and us. When you’re gonna kick that witch’s ass “klaus said with a smirk

Dean looks at him with a cheeky grin “didn’t know you had it in you”

America node with determination as she breaks the binds with her power and free them from, they’re binds. Wong grunt as he tries to keep you inside the magic sphere. You break free from the magic and walk towards them seeing they’re free you crash them with your power breaking their bones before you could kill them America jump from the table with a war cry and punch you in the face, causing multiple universe portal to open.

America stunned at her own strength clenches her fists raise her eyebrow at you “huh huh” 

Touch where she hit you smirk at her with a crazed look on your face “Mm mm”

She punches you again, again and again and kick you on the stomach as everyone gather around dean and klaus cheer at that as Sam watch it all anxiously. The last kick had opened portal to hell and Sam and dean cas share look at the familiar place.

You almost fall over before you catch yourself quickly glancing at America with a murderous look before she can punch you, eyes glowing red, you caught her fist in red glow slowly pushing her back America grunts, and Wong stop them from intervening. 

You absorb her power making the portal close “I can’t beat you. “With her other hand clenched “so I’ll give you what you want” she throws the last punch making a portal enraged you grab her by the neck making her kneel.

When you see where she opened the portal you glance at familiar place in panic turning to see your boys sitting on the couch “Charlie, Oliver” the petrified frozen state of your boys made you heart hurts.

Series masterlist

[tulsk87]

Summary: “Well maybe there is something that makes you ineligible. Something that would make you unable to be his vessel” It’s what had kept Dean thinking all evening. There were rules even the devil had to follow. He couldn't violate the “Say-yes”-Rule or he would have already. If they could just find another one. Anything that he couldn't find a way around, that would make him unable to take Sammy as his vessel.

“In Angel lore there is only one type of person that can trump an Angel’s rights and entitlements. Find a way to bind yourself to them and you should be safe.”

Maybe Dean was excatly the right type of person to save Sam.

[dinoit]

Sam is one of my favorite characters, i feel like I’ve watched the show enough times to really get why he did the things he did and why he is the way he is, and he’s an amazingly complex character. BUT DEAN I mean, I dunno, I just felt him so hard.

Having one person be everything you need, everything you have, and everything you want to protect. Making decisions based solely on what would make them happy and how to keep them close. That overwhelming urge to bind yourself to them in any way you can so you never fall apart and can be their everything too. It’s just too much, and maybe that’s why I have trouble seeing those two as platonic, because maybe it starts that way but it doesn’t end that way.

That person enters your life at a young age, and you don’t know what love is and so you put them in the realm of sibling. And maybe you start to get jealous over others they have in their life, and maybe you think about them all the time, and maybe you try and picture a life without them but you just can’t, but it’s all fine because they’re still your “little sibling”.

But then, as it inevitably happens, there’s suddenly a distance between you, and they’re so far out of reach. And you’re fine, you are, you still do your routine, you still talk to the same people, you still meet new people, but something just feels hollow. You think you’re fine but everyone else can see you’re a shell. Nothing in the world is right and you can’t pick up the phone to call them and after enough time apart you don’t even know what you would say. And you still think about them almost every day, but you can’t burden them with you, you can’t go back and mess up their happiness. Even though you still want to be that happiness, it could never be you. So you’re normal, you move on and tuck their smiles deep into your memory.

And then as the cycle goes, you see each other again. It’s all tentative and strange to you, even though they seem normal, all your words are wrong and you don’t know how familiar to be with them, but they just feel right and good to be around. And you still have this guilt because you feel like you’re messing up their perfect life but now that they’re back you almost can’t help it. And you try to put on the old shoes, add a bit more distance to keep them safe from yourself, but you’re grown now, and you can’t ignore what should’ve been obvious years ago. You’re in love with them and there’s nothing you can do to make it stop. There’s no one who’s ever made you feel the way you’ve felt about them, and you’re so fucking scared that you’ll never be able to feel that way about someone else ever again, because this person definitely can’t feel that way about you.

And that’s why i think i can so easily understand Dean, he had his Sammy and I had my childhood best friend. And now every bone inside me aches to be around her but I just can’t, and I don’t know how Dean couldn’t be aching just as hard. But maybe that’s just me projecting lmao

[jxwmv]

my autism with this being my long-time special interest: “well hello! allow me to introduce myself-“

mario is totally oblivious to the internet and thinks that the terms ‘nsfw’ and ‘sfw’ and pertain to actual work safety. luigi, on the other hand, is absolutely aware.

mario would be the type to buy anything and everything off of amazon while totally unaware of spending luigi’s debit card money (or they have a shared account for money like life savings or spending purposes)

mario would be the type to use bright mode on his phone with his brightness and volume all the way up; apps would constantly be running while also killing his already-low battery (i’m talking like 15-20%). luigi questions mario’s constant disorganization while bringing spare accessories in preparation (e.g. chargers, earphones, etc.)

luigi’s autistic and mario has adhd (both late diagnosed).

when luigi was little, he would hide underneath of tables and areas to comfort himself in overstimulating environments. he would most likely be binding under a very specific table and mario would instantly know where he would be, thinking that this would be some game of hide and seek or peek-a-boo upon finding him for the first time.

luigi is still very fond of quiet, dark surroundings that soothe him (though he sleeps with a nightlight on to be able to see.)

luigi sleeps with a teddy bear that he has from his childhood, though would refuse to tell anyone about it as a result of being made fun of horrendously throughout his childhood. only mario knows and he also sleeps with a stuffie of sorts.

the brothers did not have a very well-off childhood so to speak, and this is something very personal between the two brothers as they were likely emotionally abused. in the mushroom kingdom, mario and luigi were given little yoshi plushies when princess peach overheard about special, favorite toys of theirs that were thrown away.

given the yoshi plushies, the brothers were initially shocked, and luigi was the first one to say thank you. while not too sure about how to react, this did not mean mario was ungrateful, but simply stunned at how kind of a gesture this was. the brothers keep their yoshi plushies but their side and have taken them on several adventures of theirs.

both mario and luigi have designated sensory issues when dealing with food textures — like how in the mario movie, mario does not like mushrooms, but luigi absolutely loves them. the both of the brothers would look out for one another to try and accommodate for designated needs whenever possible (e.g. taking turns cooking, involving one another throughout the process, buying each other’s safe foods, etc.)

luigi would prefer very sweet things while mario would like savory items; bowser, surprisingly introduced mario to spicy foods (e.g. ramen noodles, soups, hot potato chips) and mario turned out to really like them!

luigi absolutely loves steak — especially when cooked to medium. luigi can make a killer steak, not to mention his spaghetti would be absolutely scrumptious with homemade sauce and everything!

in terms of music, mario would be more of the upbeat, pop-loving type, though gained interest in some of the more classic artists like dean martin and frank sinatra through luigi. additionally, both of the brothers like billy joel, queen, and depeche mode.

that was a-lot, please excuse me for my rambling. i will think of more and be happy to post them whenever the time comes!

@n64gamepak @everythingtoony @henryplush @multicolour-ink @zootopiathingz

Random SMB movie headcanons that randomly came to me at random times

Luigi always keeps his phone at high percentage. It never gets below 70%. Mario however almost never charges his phone so it’s always at 20% on low battery mode

Toad’s love language is cooking for his friends and occasionally hitting them with his staff

When the gang first started hanging out DK playfully made a joke at Luigi’s expense, and immediately got the shit beat out of him by Mario. He learned not to ever insult Luigi again, even if it’s lighthearted

Peach occasionally has nightmares about Mario dying (poor girl witnessed him almost die twice)

Luigi listens to Taylor Swift. Mario listens to Britney Spears

DK is actually a huge softie but bc we saw him with Mario for most of his screentime he didn’t show it

Mario once accidentally cussed in front of Peach (probably stubbed his toe or smt) and at first assumed she didn’t hear it. But then later she repeated it in front of the whole gang and Mario was flabbergasted.

Toad is aroace

Mario and Luigi are huge mama’s boys. But when it comes to her showing them affection in public Mario’s the one that gets embarrassed while Luigi happily accepts it

Kamek taught Bowser how to play piano

The gang regularly have races against each other. Peach is usually the winner but sometimes the boys surprise her at the last second. But DK almost never wins and he’s always salty about it

Mario’s a fighting drunk, Luigi’s a crying drunk, Peach is a black out drunk, DK’s a sloppy drunk, and Toad’s a “tells you all the secrets of the universe while eating snacks” drunk

^ Bowser’s a mix of fighting drunk and crying about his ex drunk

DK jokingly flirts with Peach sometimes just to annoy Mario. Even after the two start dating DK still does it as an inside joke

Gonna keep reblogging this as I think of more