#dean might have more experience but do you know what cas has

[the-mpreg-guy]

big fan of dean thinking he’s going to be in charge of the intimacy only for cas to become the bossiest cunt deans ever been with the second he realizes he can get away with it

[waywardxwords]

I've Got You

Summary: After a year of being in Purgatory, Dean has returned and is trying to make sense of what happened while he was away.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female Reader (more of a friendship; they deeply care about each other but nothing wildly romantic happens in this story)

Word Count: ~1.6k

Warnings: Light cursing, angst, Dean/Sam contention (this takes place after Dean gets back from Purgatory and Sam is on/off with Amelia), light fluff, light blood/silver testing (non-descriptive)

A/N: Happy October, friends! This is my first entry for the #flufftober2023 @flufftober prompt challenge. The prompt is: "I've got you." I hope you enjoy!

“Dean,” you breathed as you walked through the door of the cabin. Even after you heard his voice on the phone, you couldn’t be sure it was really him–not until you saw him. 

“Test me,” his words were firm and clear–much firmer than you remembered. You processed that the man had been in Purgatory for the last year, and his experience had most likely hardened his already tough demeanor. 

“Dean, I–” you tried to stop him.

“Test me, dammit,” he grumbled as he grabbed what looked like a jug of holy water and took a swig of it. Next was the silver; he didn’t hesitate to run it along his forearm before he wrapped the cut it left behind with a bandana. He wiped the blade on his denim jeans. 

“Dean,” you said, for the third time now. Your eyes burned with tears. You knew it was him from the get go, but now it was confirmed. He handed you the holy water and the blade. You moved slower than he did, but you took a sip of the water and winced at the bitterness; it was laced with salt. Then, you took the blade and matched his movements with a small slice on the underside of your forearm. 

Without allowing another moment to pass, he pulled you in tightly to his chest for a hug–so tight, you thought you might not be able to breathe as your body was crushed against his. 

“God, it’s good to see you,” he breathed in your hair before he finally released you. “Where’s Sammy?” His eyes moved over your face inquisitively.

“I, uh, I don’t know, Dean,” you were careful with your words. You were a little bit angry with Sam, but you didn’t want to have to explain why to Dean.

“What do you mean, you don’t know?” The sharpness made you blink, but you knew he wasn’t trying to hurt you with his tone. The man had been in Purgatory for a year, for Christ’s sake. 

There was no way around it, though. You were going to have to try to explain and hope he could understand.

“I’ve gotta get out of here,” Sam mumbled. It had been three days since you all had killed the Leviathans, but somehow Dean and Castiel had been killed in the process. You had spent three days researching and looking for how to find them, but you had come up empty. Sam had tossed around the idea of Purgatory , for Cas, at least, because he was an angel; but neither of you knew how that worked–the death of an angel? Where would they go? Could an angel go to Hell? 

“Sam, we’re going to find them,” your eyes were heavy, you hadn’t slept. The pain of running in circles reading and re-reading and searching was making you feel crazy.

“Are we? Even if we do find them, how are we going to get them out?” Sam was angry, and you understood that. But anger wasn’t helping the situation, and you wished he could realize that.

“I don’t know yet,” you sighed as you placed your elbows on the wooden table in front of you and dropped your head into your hands. “We will find a way. We always do.”

“I have no one now. My family is dead, I just…I gotta get out of here,” he repeated. His words stung, but you knew you weren’t family. You weren’t even a hunter, initially. You had stumbled into this world when the Winchesters had saved you on a hunt a while back. Now that you knew what went bump in the night, there was no turning back. “I’m sorry, but I have to go…” Sam seemed reckless, but you also knew that you couldn’t stop him. Not really, anyway.

You stayed silent, but as the door closed behind him, tears pooled in your tired eyes.

After you had explained carefully what had transpired, you tried to ease the blow. “You always wanted Sam to get out of the hunting life, Dean.” Your words were soft.

Dean sat on the sofa leaned forward, his elbows on his thighs as he stared at the wall opposite him. His jaw tightened, but he didn’t say a word.

“I gotta get some air,” he cleared his throat and stood quickly. He reached for his jacket. “I’ll be back later.” Before you could say a word, he was already out the door and pulling it behind him with a slam. You couldn’t help but feel defeated, yet again.

This was the third dive bar you had checked in an hour. You had lost hope and wondered if you really knew the oldest Winchester at all as you looked for him. But there he sat on a barstool at the end of the dimly lit bar. 

You heaved a sigh before you walked towards him. “I’m gettin’ real tired of looking for your ass,” you grumbled playfully as you carefully moved onto the stool next to him. 

His eyes didn’t move from the back of the bar as he took a pull from his beer. 

“Yeah, well, at least somebody’s lookin’,” he muttered just loud enough for you to hear.

You weren’t sure what to say to that immediately, so instead you leaned against the bar and flagged down the bartender. “Could I get a Stella, please?” The bartender nodded and went to retrieve your bottled beer.

A few moments of silence passed. “I just thought he’d look for me,” Dean's voice cut through the quiet noise in the bar as he stared at the label on his bottle. His fingernails picked at the edges in a way to distract himself. 

“I know,” you tried to form the words in your head before they tumbled out of your mouth incorrectly. “Sam loves you, Dean. He’s just…he’s tired. Does that make it right? Not necessarily. You’re his brother, but this life…it’s not the life he wanted.”

“And you think I wanted it?!” His voice raised as he looked at you incredulously. 

“I’m not saying that. I’m just saying that you and Sam are different people,” you tried to explain carefully, reminding yourself again that it’s not you, it’s Purgatory. 

He seemed to relax as he remembered this was you that he was talking to. “I’m sorry,” he groaned inwardly as he turned back in his stool to face the bar. “I would do absolutely anything for Sammy. I was lost when he was gone. I just thought he might do the same.” After a quick pull from his beer, he changed the subject. “So, what’d you do this past year?” Dean asked acrimoniously, as he glanced at you briefly and toyed with the paper label on his beer bottle.

You waited for a moment, just as the bartender placed your own beer in front of you. You moved it around in your hands for a few seconds. Like Dean, your fingers found the sticker on the bottle and began to pick at it so you wouldn’t have to look at him. “I looked for you,” you answered slowly before you pulled the beer to your mouth and took a sip. You felt his gaze now, his head turned to watch you as if he was surprised to hear what you said. “I hunted a little, here and there. Mostly just when I stumbled upon a job, though.”

“...you looked for me?”

You were surprised that he was surprised. It was your turn to turn your head back to him to meet his gaze. “Of course I did,” you said hesitantly. “I tried everything, Dean. I interrogated demons, I tried to make a deal, I tried to summon Crowley–”

He cut you off very quickly. “Woah, woah, woah,” his eyes were narrowed in on you now and you watched his entire body tense. “You tried to make a deal? And summoning Crowley?” He was pissed. You didn’t care.

“None of it worked, Dean. The crossroad demons said they didn’t know where you were, but I didn’t believe them…though I’m wondering if they really didn’t, since you were in Purgatory,” you were mostly just reading your own internal dialogue at this point. “I’m not sure how that works, exactly.” You nibbled gently on your bottom lip as you processed your thoughts.

“Are you insane?” He was still pissed. His voice rose a bit in volume and you glanced around to see the handful of other bar patrons glance in your direction. 

“Oh, calm down,” you said in a hushed tone while you rolled your eyes. “Like you wouldn’t do the same thing.” Dean knew it was true, but he still wasn’t happy. “Again, none of it worked anyway.”

“You know better than that,” he shook his head, the disappointment bled through his words. But somewhere mixed in with the frustration, you heard gratitude.

“And you know better, too. I wasn’t just going to sit on my ass or ride off into the sunset like everything was fine,” you still couldn’t find his gaze. It was easier to stare at the glass bottle between your hands.

He didn’t respond right away. The sound of Def Leppard’s “Pour Some Sugar On Me” was playing on the jukebox now, and it was the only noise you could hear just over the chatter of the other people in the bar. “Thanks,” you weren’t sure you heard him right away, but you felt his fingers graze the top of one of your hands that was clasped around the bottle. “I’m really glad I’ve got you. So if some shit ever goes down again, no goin' off and making deals to save me. If I came back and somethin' had happened to you..." his voice trailed off. You would spend a lot of time wondering what he had wanted to say, but chose not to. Instead, you moved your head to look straight into those green eyes, and that’s when you noticed it. A smirk tugged at the corners of his lips, and while his eyes were still sad, you saw a glimmer of hope.

A/N: Thank you for reading! As always, I am always open to any feedback you may have :)

Tag List: @jackles010378 @ladysparkles78 @hallecarey1 @zepskies @lyarr24

[ladyofthe-lake]

"Wrap Me Tight" — a Suptober ficlet

Day 17: Wings

Summary:

Dean finds a way, finally, to sleep well.

It’s one of those lazy afternoons. The type Castiel never thought he’d get to experience. He’d heard about them, sure, from the humans; apparently they were very protective over their lazy afternoons, their time spent doing nothing. Castiel had always thought it sounded boring; why would you want to do simply nothing? He had passed entire centuries doing very little, but they’d always moved swiftly, and he’d never quite wanted them to slow down.

Now, though, in the bunker with Dean – Cas understands the appeal.

In between hunts, in between fighting big bads, there are the soft days. The slow ones. Castiel forced himself, at first, to pass them with Dean; to stay, rather than flit off to some far corner, checking for news, omens.

And then he’d found that he quite liked them.

They’re better than the nights. In the afternoons, the lights remain on, there are things to do. They watch movies, or read, or just talk. He loves to hear Dean’s voice, loves what he has to say.

When evening comes, Dean grows cagey. Castiel knows that now that most of the dangers of his life have passed, though something always looms on the horizon, Dean’s having nightmares. He can’t hide it; Castiel can hear him wake up screaming, can see the sweat on his brow in the mornings, and those are the nights when Dean doesn’t allow him into his bedroom. The nights Dean can feel a nightmare coming on.

Castiel hopes this isn’t one of those nights.

It’s raining outside; Cas knows this because he’s coming back from the store, where he picked up drinks and food. When he returns to the bunker, Dean’s in the kitchen, whistling and cleaning. He turns as he hears Castiel approach.

“You get the pie?” he asks, always strangely suspicious that Cas would forget.

Cas holds up the bag. “Of course, Dean,” he replies. “I got several flavors. I didn’t know which you’d prefer.”

He sets it down on the counter and Dean comes over to him. He cups Cas’s cheeks in his hands and says, seriously, “Never change. I ever tell you that? I mean it.” He kisses him lightly before pulling the food from the bag, examining Castiel’s choices.

“Is Sam still not back?” Cas asks.

“Nope, he called a little while ago, said he’d be another night,” Dean replies easily as he takes the meat to the fridge. He casts Cas a backward glance. “Guess it’s just you and me.”

Castiel smiles at that. “We’ll have to make do.”

The afternoon slides by like that. Dean eats a few pieces of one of the pies and drinks a beer; Castiel drinks two bottles of vodka and just begins to feel the tendrils of tipsiness. Dean drags him to the living room and puts a movie on, stretches, and Castiel knows this routine. The one where Dean hems and haws and acts like he doesn’t want to lay in Cas’s lap, but he always ends up there. So Castiel cuts it short; he gestures to his lap, says, “C’mon.”

“If you insist.” Dean lays down on the couch, his legs so long that they kick up onto the opposite armrest, and his head comes to rest in Cas’s lap. Cas brings his fingers to play with Dean’s hair like he knows Dean likes. If Dean can slip into sleep now, he might get some real rest. The bags beneath his eyes, his heavy movements – these might fade. However, he knows that even in naps, even during the daytime, Dean often wakes up screaming.

The movie continues and he feels Dean relax slowly. His own eyelids begin to droop, though he is an angel, he is not truly falling into sleep – it’s more like his body (his vessel – he needs to stop referring to it as his body) is slipping into a calm, relaxed state alongside Dean’s.

He doesn’t realize he’s done it until Dean jumps, looking around wildly. “What the fuck–”

“What, Dean?” Castiel looks around them but there’s nothing there.

“Something – fucking – touched me–” Dean’s sitting up straight now and he touches his hand to his waist, frowning down at it.

Castiel pauses, realization dawning on him, and he doesn’t say anything for a moment. He’s not sure how Dean will take it.

But Dean knows him by now, knows him well enough that he narrows his eyes at him. “Cas,” he says, warning.

“It was, uh, me,” Castiel admits carefully. Dean has taken fairly well to some of his other angelic aspects, but Cas isn’t quite sure about this.

“You?” Dean raises his eyebrows. “How, you got another hand I don’t know about?”

“Not a hand.” Castiel watches him, waits for him to realize.

And he does – pretty quickly, too. Dean’s raised eyebrows go even higher, more curious. “Your wings? Touched me?”

“I’m afraid so.” He hadn’t meant to do it, truly. It was an angelic impulse, he supposes – the desire to embrace Dean with more than just his hands, his arms.

“Didn’t know they could uh, break the fourth wall like that,” Dean says, and he seems half-amused, half… is he scared?

“Typically no. But I… I lost focus. I apologize, Dean, I didn’t mean to.” Shame, a frustratingly human emotion, floods him.

Dean frowns. “No, no, man, it’s…” He breathes a laugh. “I mean. It’s just weird, I didn’t know that was, uh, something that was… possible.”

“It’s likely never happened before,” Castiel allows. “I doubt any other angel has ever allowed themselves to be so relaxed in the presence of a human.”

“Aw, Cas, you sayin’ I make you comfortable? You go all gooey and forget your form?” Dean jokes with a smirk.

“In a sense.”

Dean leans forward and kisses him. “It’s okay, Cas. I get it. You’re a celestial being crammed into a body. If anything, I’m honored.”

Dean relaxes back against him, lying with his head in Cas’s lap again, and Cas allows his wings to spread out. The movie continues to play but neither is paying attention to it.

Dean can surely hear the flutter of his wings, and Castiel wraps them around him, tentatively at first. The way he can feel Dean beneath his hands and wings is entirely different; the last time, in fact, he held Dean like this was in the depths of Hell. He had wrapped him in his wings and soared upward, the man’s body safe against Castiel’s chest.

Now years have passed. Slow, human years. So many things have happened and Castiel is able to touch Dean now without shame. He was once told that the touch of Dean corrupted him, that he had been lost the moment he’d laid a hand – a wing – upon his skin. But Castiel knows this isn’t the case.

He feels the moment Dean slips out of wakefulness and into sleep, and Castiel wraps his wings more tightly around him. He can hear the rustle of feathers and he allows his own head to fall back against the back of the couch, his own eyes to fall shut. He isn’t the one being held, and yet he too can feel the calm, the warmth of it.

It’s morning when Dean wakes. Twelve hours of sleep have gone by with no dreams whatsoever; he rolls over, groggy, stiff from the couch cushions, and rubs his eyes. Castiel smiles down at him, looking as if he too is coming from sleep. “Good morning, Dean,” he says. “How’d you sleep?”

And Dean takes a moment to assess, to smile, before he says, “Like a fuckin’ baby.”

[scoobydoodean]

so imagine emma somehow reappeared in season 15. i think we can all pretty much agree that dean would be quite emotionally affected by her, but how do you think sam would react? obviously he’s changed a lot since season 7, and of course they’ve had jack now, so do you think he’d feel terrible and admit he was wrong, or even with all that do you think he’d defend his actions? do you think he would bring up amy and let it become a bigger debate about other times they’d disagreed? thanks in advance if you answer :)

I certainly don't think Sam would try to kill Emma again. I think he saw killing her as a necessary evil in 7.13 due to his and Dean's tenuous psychological states, which caused Sam to assess her as a much more serious threat to Dean's life than Sam would at almost any other point in the series. Basically, in any other season, I think Sam would look at Emma with much more compassion, and would believe they had the practical capacity to try and get through to her (see: 1.16, 2.03, 4.04, 5.06, 12.04, 13.01-13.03). In another season, Sam would (imo) be willing to risk another surprise assault thinking they could handle it if it happened—especially in the future with the bunker at their disposal. But in 7.13, the brothers have no home (not even the impala), recently lost Bobby, and lost Cas. They have absolutely zero stability and no resources. Dean is suicidally depressed, and Sam is hallucinating. Sam does not believe he and Dean have the capacity to handle a brainwashed child who might show up and ambush them within that very precarious context, so he kills her. He has lost everyone and everything, and he absolutely will not risk losing Dean too. That fear comes out as rage at Dean in the car, but I don't think Sam killing Emma was mean-spirited or an attempt to punish him. It was just... incredibly cold and calculated.

Is there a reason why you pick season 15 specifically for an Emma revival? Sam navigating how to handle a revived Emma later in the series would be interesting, but I personally wouldn't do it in season 15. I'd do it a little earlier than that—maybe 13-14. Maybe it's just because of my bias against season 15... but it feels too... mytharc heavy? Sam's morals surrounding family sacrifice change around season 14/15 which adds another complication as far as how he might re-assess 7.13. I think Dean might just implode if he had one more thing on his plate in season 15 and a lot of the juiciest father/daughter bits would be subsumed by Dean's fears of Chuck meddling which to me would be a shame. I also think conflicts between Sam and Jack over Emma would be juiciest in season 13 or 14 and imo there's a lot of potential there that would be overcomplicated or missed.

In general though, Sam handles a lot of negative emotions and traumatic experiences by pretending they do not exist/never happened. This is why he immediately sows the narrative that Emma was not really Dean's child. So he can make that the story and invalidate any significance she might possess. Her coming back would force him to confront something he already knows deep down but won't face—that Emma was Dean's child who had been brainwashed by a cult, and Sam killed her in perhaps the most cold-blooded play he's ever (knowingly) made. It's possible that Sam would react negatively to being in Emma's presence because it would resurface those feelings and that Sam would eventually make justifications to try and shove all those feelings back down again. But I actually suspect if Sam went the "Well things have changed now but I wasn't wrong for what I did back then" route, his main conflict wouldn't end up being with Dean. I suspect his biggest hurdle in terms of family conflict would end up being with Jack in a season 13-14 context, because I think Jack would see their similarities, and it might color his perception of both Sam and Dean's reaction to him in early season 13. I think he'd have a lot of questions about how Sam could see the good in him but not Emma despite him being objectively far more dangerous than her and having actively demonstrated that several times by hurting and killing several people and almost reviving ancient evils, etc. I think it could revive some of Jack's early concerns over Sam wanting to use him and not really caring about him. I'd even wonder if he might see Dean's initial rejection as part of a foundation Sam himself laid when he killed Dean's child then went back on without any explanation. Like I think they could reach common ground and Sam could reassure Jack, but I think it could create some very juicy conversations surrounding Jack and necessary evils.

I don't NOT think Sam and Dean would have a conflict over Emma, but tbh one has to acknowledge that at the end of the day... there is pretty much nothing Sam can't get Dean to shut up about, including his own traumatic experiences in hell that Dean specifically does not ever talk about because of Sam. If Sam tried to kill Emma again, that'd be another matter... but if it was just about whether Sam was wrong for Doing All Of That...? I'm genuinely not sure I would look to Dean to reignite a war over it. If anything, he probably told himself the entire situation was all his fault a long time ago. Now if you push that Emma revival back to the CARVER era...

[stanfordsweater]

silly question but i need to ask as someone who is kind of new to wincest fandom, when someone says they're a deangirl/samgirl does that mean that either one is their favorite character or is it more of a kinning thing??? also... salmon dean.... i assume is not a beloved aquatic au tag that everyone but me knows about... ?? i just haven't been able to tell what people use it for 😩

hello bestie!! welcome to our storied fandom 💖

so "sam girl" and "dean girl" are kind of reclaimed terms that used to refer to fans who were VERY devoted to one brother at the expense of the other-- forums were ablaze, livejournals were raided, the whole shebang. this STILL HAPPENS, but these days we call the extreme stans "bitter sam girls" (BSG) and "extreme dean girls" (EDG). if you're on twitter you will likely see the BSGs calling themselves "sammies" and the EDGs calling themselves..... jensen ackles stans, honestly 🫡 not to be derisive but just in my personal experience the most extreme dean fans on twitter are there for jensen, whereas the opposite is not always true for jared. these terms for extreme stans have ALSO been reclaimed, with there being a "bitter sam girl club," and good for them!

meanwhile, on tumblr, ___ girl terms are still in use, now just referring to favouring one brother over the other. many people opt for a gender-neutral term instead eg. sam fan/stan, dean fan/stan. supernatural was huge in fandom long before kinning came on to the scene, but i do know a lot of newer fans might also describe themselves as a "sam kinnie" or a "dean kinnie." i know nothing about this subculture so you'd have to ask them about it 😌 TL;DR kinning is not the same as being a ___girl.

there are also "bibros," which used to mean you liked the brothers equally (get it? bi?) but now just means you like both brothers period, so someone could be a sam girl or a sam fan or a sammie and still be a bibro. there are also dean girls or dean fans or dean stans who are bibros. if you're a BSG/EDG, you are too busy throwing darts at a poster of the other guys face to feel the looooove.

then you have "bronly," a term which has fallen out of favour but is eternally relevant in this corner of the fandom. it began as an insult, but has since been reclaimed. a bronly is a "brothers only" fan, aka "only" cares about the brothers. while the show was airing this was a way to indicate that you weren't about to do PR for supporting actors, but now that the show is over it really just means you sometimes skip through cas' storylines in the later seasons. a bronly will never be seen calling this an ensemble cast show.

AS FOR SALMONDEAN, this is a fandom joke that emerged from saying "sam and dean" too fast, and j2 (jared and jensen) have made jokes about it on stage at cons. not sure if they joked about it first or if fandom did. salmondean = sam and dean when you're in a silly, goofy mood.

[angelsdean]

you probably noticed this but: right after dean finishes telling the CBGB story, he says “john friggin winchester” and takes a shot, and the jacting joices in that moment are… god. i mean the jacting joices are there the entire time ofc but they kinda give *overemphasizing this as a ‘cool john’ story* to me at first, but in that final moment—dean purses his lips, he shifts in his seat, he stares into the distance… he looks bitter. it’s like dean allows himself to feel bitter about this story for just a second, when sam and cas are no longer looking at him ://

(the exact moment i’m talking about is in a gifset you reposted recently)

Yea there's definitely a vibe throughout the whole thing that he's like, telling it as this "funny anecdote" but underneath there's more feelings brewing about this story. Like the story itself comes up because Sam prompts him to tell it, so it's not even Dean's first thought.

Even Cas asking them "You loved your father?" and Dean's response, "With all I had" is like, on the surface you can take that as a positive statement but it's also pretty vague when you really poke at it. It's like, okay and how much love for your father DID you have? It's not the same as a resounding "Yes, of course!" It's more, "I loved him as much as I personally could, given everything." And I do think Dean loved his father. Dean is full of love and he cares even when people might not deserve it. But, we also know he's no stranger to criticizing his father (as he literally says in the next breath that John was not winning any Dad of the year awards) and acknowledging that he was put through shit he did not deserve at way too young of an age.

Even him saying "damn if he wasn't there when we needed him" it's, I mean, he's literally criticized John for being a deadbeat and leaving them and not answering the phone and putting them in danger before so this line immediately rings hollow. And in the context of the scene it makes sense that he'd say this to Cas because Cas is specifically asking them about John as a way of understanding what a father is supposed to do. He prefaces his questions about John with the fact that HE never knew his father and thus has little experience with this whole Claire situation. He's looking for guidance, so it makes sense that Dean would over-embellish a little and want to paint John in a better light for the sake of telling Cas that "yea a good dad is there for their kids." Which we Know John wasn't always there for them. (Side note but all of this ALSO ties into Rowena and Crowley's subplot this episode, how she abandoned HER kid, wasn't there for him, left him vulnerable but is trying to be there now etc etc. Thematically it's an episode abt imperfect parents and their children). And the fact that Sam prompts the story to me says that Dean was probably just going to leave it at that, simply giving his advice to Cas that good dads are always there for their kids.

But anyways, all this to say, I can definitely see Dean feeling bitter about the story at the end there. Especially as the happy little mood drops and he's no longer trying to "give advice" and is reminded of the case, Claire, and how his own experiences actually relate to hers. It's like he finishes telling the story Sam prompted him to tell in the first place and he remembers, "yeah and that was fucked up. and dad might've been there THEN but what about all the other times he left us vulnerable and open to be preyed on. and now Claire is in the hands of this pseudo-guardian who is also putting her in dangerous and vulnerable situations, and and and."

[deancaspinefest]

A Fabulous Evening's Apocalypse

Author: MrBotanyB | Artist: BasketcaseBetty

Posting on Monday April 1

Look at it this way: Their trip to the far end of space and time to chase a (very) long shot at freeing Dean from the Mark of Cain could have ended a lot worse than it did. It wasn't even the worst idea they'd ever had. The so-called Restaurant At the End of the Universe loops endlessly in time through the final hours of Creation while guests dance, eat, and drink until the very last of last calls. A consequence of it being a time loop is that anybody who visits can meet everybody else who was ever there. Even a centuries-dead witch who likes the challenge of lifting unbreakable curses. It didn't work out like they'd hoped, but they didn't die. True, Cas did get stranded there for a bit but they got him back. Eventually. So it was fine. That was then. And now, Sam and Dean are out of ideas for getting Cas out of the Empty. Dean has been thinking a lot about realizing important truths too late, and missed chances, and (very) long shots. And he wonders if the key to rescuing the Cas he lost might just be enlisting the help of the Cas he left behind nearly ten years ago. If it doesn't work, at least he'll get to see Cas one more time.

Keep reading for a sneak preview!

"I don't know for sure if he's the man from your photo, but they do look awfully alike. He'll probably be in the Fomalhaut Lounge. You can take the service passages," Zmallia said. She stepped back into a particularly shadowy corner and pressed a barely-visible panel. There was a whirr as a door he hadn't noticed slid open. "The fastest way is to follow the signs for the engine room until you get to the stairs, then keep going up until you see the big panel of signs for the different bars," she explained rapidly. "And don't take the elevator unless you want an argument. Obviously," she added.

Dean nodded as if this made any sense at all and ducked into the dimly lit passage. "Good luck!" Zmallia called after him.

And just as the door whirred shut: "Sorry I yelled at you earlier!"

As soon as he had rounded a corner, Dean stopped and leaned against the wall, bracing his hands on his knees. The new round of headache and nausea wasn't quite as intense as what he had felt when he stepped out of the portal, but it was still bad enough he couldn't just power through it.

Going soft in my old age, he thought. It wasn't as painful a thought as it would once have been.

Many flights of stairs and about fifteen minutes later, Dean stepped into a high-ceilinged, softly-lit room decorated in dark golds and blues. It wasn't overly crowded, but it was large enough that Dean couldn't tell right away whether or not Cas was actually here. The "room" was almost a balcony, Dean realized: the longest wall was a waist-high glass railing that provided an unobstructed view of what was left of the dying universe, easily observed through the great transparent dome covering the entire restaurant. A good part of the crowd was gathered near the railing, and many others were nursing drinks at the long curving bar, which was backed by open shelving through which you could see the opposite side of the dome. Dean had just decided to ask one of the waiters if they'd seen Cas when he spotted him behind the bar, polishing a glass and looking perfectly at home, solid and real.

He had thought it might be a shock to see Cas alive again, and it was — the best kind of shock. It was beyond awesome to see Cas right there. The recessed lighting from the bar angled off his cheekbones and made his hair look even darker than it was. His uniform was spotless. He looked like a movie star. He almost looked like he was glowing.

But in a rotten, selfish way, seeing him was disappointing: this Cas lacked five years' worth of experience that had shaped the person who had died for Dean (while Dean had stood there, useless and uncertain.) This Cas had never even imagined knowing Jack. The happiness Dean felt choking his throat just meant he was putting his own greedy feelings ahead of his Cas, the one still trapped in the Empty. The one Dean had come all this way to try to bring home.

But thinking that also felt rotten. Dean knew that this Cas was, literally at this moment, waiting for Dean or Sam to help him get home. Maybe he was worrying that they wouldn't be able to. (Or wouldn't bother.) How did the Cas in front of him deserve less?

(continue reading on Ao3 on Monday April 1)

[castieldelamancha]

They are laying together in bed, in complete silence, Dean's back is pressed close to Castiel's and, even if they turned off the lights half an hour ago, they are both still wide awake. 

Waiting.

Dean doesn't say anything, refusing to keep arguing in circles with Cas, he knows he has to say something, he doesn't want this oppressing silence to sleep with them, he stretches his arm, reaching for the bed's edge, there is plenty of space, the same he is sure Castiel has on his side; he yawns, widely. He should say something, he doesn't want this anger to steal their covers, such a rude guest to have over for the night.

"Hey, uhm, Cas?" 

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry, that was a stupid move, the risk I took," he feels Castiel's back shifting against his as he takes a deep breath. 

"I should apologize too, I know why you did what you did," he just wanted to help an inexperience hunter, too bad to make that happen he had to put himself and his life on the line, he would do it again, he knows it, they both know it, that's why they barely hunt nowadays, save for the occasional emergency, like this one hunt, " when I left," and Dean has to make a conscious effort to keep those moments off his mind, the pitch black darkness that surrounds them now way too similar to the one that took Cas, "I did it for the world, yes, but I also had my selfish motivations, ultimately it was all about saving you and giving you the chance to live, to hope, to be free and I don't particularly enjoy the reminder of how quick that all can be gone if we aren't careful." Dean bumps their backs together, lightly. 

Dean should promise to be more careful from now on, a promise that he knows he will eventually break, because that's their life; he could say thank you, but Castiel doesn't like him showing gratitude for what he did, because that wasn't why he did it. Dean owes him both nothing and the whole world at the same time.

"I will try my best," he says, "to honor the gifts you gave me." And he does already, by simply being with Cas, allowing himself to have the freedom to love him as he had always wanted, feeling alive like never before when they touch, hoping this thing they have will be forever, knowing deep down it will be. Castiel hums.

"That's good to hear, one wise man once told me that gifts aren't supposed to be returned." Dean huffs but smiles lightly.

"Wise, huh? Big words coming from someone with all the knowledge of the universe in their brain."

"Wisdom can come in many shapes and sizes, Dean, I might have all that knowledge, but it's just as valuable as the experience you have and that, in almost all matters, I still seem to lack." He is a fast learner, though, Dean can attest to that.

With a wordless agreement they decide to turn around at the same time, an awkward tangle of limbs ensue until they can find a comfortable position that has them touching head to toe. 

Castiel rests his hand over Dean's steady heartbeat and Dean leans in to kiss his forehead, "still alive, sweetheart," he runs his fingers through Castiel's hair, "I still have my hope, and I still have my faith," a bright future, Castiel beside him and, since he still has his freedom, and all his love, all his, in his heart, cradled tenderly by Castiel's hands, he tilts his head down and kisses Castiel like he has kissed him thousands of times, like he would have never allowed himself to kiss him not that long ago, as much as he wanted to.

[farenmaddox]

What does it actually mean that Jack killed Felix the snake?

a.k.a. Jack didn't kill Mary, pt. 2

I wanted to make a separate post from my other post about how I think Jack didn't kill Mary to talk more about the snake. In that post, I brought up Felix only briefly, as an explanation for Jack's state of being at the time: "soulless, trying to do the right thing in spite of that, very in-control of himself and his powers." But I have like a million thoughts on the snake, so.

In-universe, Jack was doing what he thought was right. His three dads, whom he looks to for cues on right vs. wrong, were implicitly if not explicitly telling him the snake's life didn't matter. They gave zero shits about that snake. "hmmmm try feeding him this variety of foods that are comically inappropriate and keep him in this tiny box, IDC man." Like, at any time, Google and veterinarians were options, but none of them could be arsed to tell Jack about those options. Like, yes, Jack is a grown man, but also he's only been on the planet for two years and he doesn't know everything!!!

So clearly (to Jack, based on the messages he is getting), the snake's life/health have no real value, and since the suffering is caused by how bad Felix misses his original owner, the best option is to send him where he won't suffer anymore. Like... I get it. This is not how I (a person with life experience and pet ownership experience as well as possession of a soul) would handle the situation. But for Jack, I get it!!!

When it gets absolutely maddening is when you think about the snake symbolically, and what Felix might possibly represent:

Satan in the Garden, his father Lucifer, temptation toward selfishness and lies and away from Paradise and truth

the poisonous death caused by being in the closet/ashamed of one's own queer desire (14x14 is one hell of an episode and boy do I need to make a separate post about Jack's relationship to Cas and Jack saving Cas from being poisoned to death by his repression of his queer desire and Cas dying because he stopped repressing it while Chuck is still running the show, then [we're told, we don't see it, I'm so suspicious] Jack saving him again once Jack is God. ANYWAYYYYYY.)

the snake eating a chicken egg fable a.k.a. the entire narrative concept that Jack is either the snake who cannot help its nature or the bait they must use to rid themselves of their enemy

So you have the snake standing in for at least one but likely all three things. And then you have to just be like, "Actually it's incredible that he killed the snake. He has rejected his birthright, he has rejected repression of self, and he has basically said that he is the secret third thing that is neither the snake nor the egg." It seems like we should actually celebrate this?

But we can only see the symbolism because we are outside of the story. Sam, Dean, and Cas are in the story, and what they see is a kid with no soul has just killed his pet, which as a storytelling device means he is going to escalate to worse things, and his three dads (who can't be arsed to find a vet) are right to be worried and take that a certain way.

But then you look at Jack's "escalation" and it's... accidentally hurting a girl who didn't trust his control over his powers, even though he had excellent control, actually, and then immediately healing her and being very upset that she's hurt. Hmmmm. We're then supposed to believe he randomly loses all control and kills someone he loves, for absolutely no reason, because in storytelling that's what happens after a character reveals they are soulless enough to kill a pet. And guess who the storyteller is??? (You don't have to guess. It's Chuck.) Chuck knows how the story goes, and he knows that a human death is what comes next in convincing them to see Jack as a threat, and he knows exactly who should die to ensure Dean does his job in the narrative (it sure isn't Nick! Whom Jack did kill and whom Dean would literally buy Jack a beer for killing in any other circumstances! Symbolically killing Lucifer as he was unable to do before!). It is wildly inconsistent with Jack's motivations and actions for him to fly off the handle and kill Mary, but that's the story Chuck needs to see, so he makes it happen.

So for the characters, who are stuck in Chuck's story, Jack is escalating his capacity for violence and killing loved ones. We, who are outside, can see the symbolic meaning and see that actually Jack is outside with us, rejecting the entire narrative. He literally killed Chuck's narrative! (But he didn't kill Mary.)

[deancasbigbang]

Title: The Patron Saint of Liars and Fakes

Author: oracle

Artist: parhelion_ava

Rating: Mature

Pairings: Dean Winchester/Castiel, Dean Winchester/Ruby, Castiel/Daphne

Length: 65000

Warnings: No Archive Warning Apply

Tags: Depictions of Drug Use, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Overdose, Unrequited But Actually Requited Love, College/University, Out of Body Experiences, Very Slow Burn

Posting Date: November 1, 2023

Summary: Dean Winchester has known he was in love with his best friend for a long time. He never planned on saying anything, at least, not until friends and family convinced him otherwise. Only the confession doesn't go as planned: Cas rejects him. Distraught and hurt, he heads to a bar to drink his sorrows away, and upon meeting a woman named Ruby, enters a whole new world. Now battling his broken heart and new substance dependance, he needs to decide what is more important: his (still ever-present and strong) feelings for Cas, or his new found "freedom" with Ruby.

Excerpt: Dean laughed to himself. “Don’t get all teary on me Sammy, you’re an ugly crier and no one wants to see that.” Sam, of course, didn’t respond but kept looking at him. “I’ll just stay here until you wake up.” His eyes geared up. “It’s the least I can do.” “How sweet.” said a new voice.  Dean turned around, startled. He wasn’t prepared for a new voice. He noticed Sam didn’t turn around, so it must have been a visitor for him.  He turned to look at the girl who was about his age. She had long dark hair, and a pale face. She was wearing hospital scrubs. “Nice to see you again Dean.” “Hey, you’re the surgery girl I saw earlier.” Dean pointed to her. “What are you doing here?” She laughed. “I’m sorry I confused you earlier.” She held out her hand. “I guess now is a time for introductions. I’m Tessa. I’m a reaper” “A reaper? Like to ferry me to another plane?” Tessa nodded and shook his hand. “Nice to meet you, I guess. You already know who I am.” She nodded. “I do.”  “So why are you here then?” Dean said. “To shepherd me to the other side?”  Tessa looked at his body. “You’re at a crossroads Dean. You have two choices. I can take you to whatever afterlife is awaiting you.” She paused, then gestured to his body. “Or you can get shoved back into this body. You might not remember this time though.” Dean raised an eyebrow. “Since when do people get choices?” “Since you are special. You’re in a trance-like state now. Think very carefully Dean. You only have one choice.” “How long do I have to choose?” Tessa looked contemplative and said, “How about this. You tell me how you ended up here and by the time the story is over I want your decision.” Dean shrugged. “Why would you care?” Tessa raised an eyebrow, and shrugged as well. “I don’t, but I do want something to pass the time.” That got a laugh out of him. Dean nodded, and said, “Whatever. So let me spin you my tale of woe.” Tessa nodded. “Alright, so who is this?” She gestured to Sam.  “My little brother. He feels partially responsible for what happened. Which is true to an extent. I mean, it wasn’t his fault entirely, but he definitely didn’t do anything to help. I can’t be too hard on him though, he did try his best. He’s only a kid And some of the things were just a bout of bad luck for me.” Tessa nodded. “Well that’s it, isn’t it? You can try your best, but it just isn’t enough sometimes. Bad things just…happen.” Dean nodded. “Yeah.” A moment went by. He looked at Sam and took. deep breath. “They do.”

DCBB 2023 Posting Schedule

[finalgirlsamwinchester]

what are your thoughts on samruby?

thank you for sending this! and OH BOY i wrote a lot. i'm so sorry. i'm putting it under a cut for everyone's sanity.

see, the thing about samruby to me is the religiosity of it all. it's about a victim unknowingly initiated into a cult. it's about a holy lamb being raised for slaughter.

firstly i can't discuss it without spilling my guts over ruby as a character!! i saw a meta the other day (and i wish i'd reblogged it bc i can't find it again) calling ruby the most devout character in supernatural. and they're right! she is! her arc is about devotion and keeping faith. she's a direct narrative foil to cas, who falls down the path of doubt and experiences a crisis of faith. For ruby, her god is lucifer, and she'll accept all persecution and undergo every trial she has to in order to fulfil her mission as his servant. and she does! she succeeds up to her death! (whereas cas fails, and lives)

she doesn't see grooming and manipulating sam as an act of corruption. it's about purification. (and we all know how sam feels about purity, aha) for ruby, the demon blood drinking is a matter of cleansing sam of human imperfection, for the purposes of presenting lucifer his ideal vessel. because the thing about sam is that he's a liminal figure. he's as human as he is monstrous - and from a demonic perspective, wouldn't his humanness be considered the infection?

the way ruby preys on sam also has a definite maternal tilt to it. from as early as s3 (like the way she says 'that's my boy!' to him in 3x04? like dean does in 1x11?). she calls him 'sammy' in a way that mirrors dean, but also evokes maternal warmth. just as dean in season 1 functions as a protector and guide for sam when he brings him back into the hunting fold, ruby does so for sam in dean's absence. sam's grief and vulnerability presents her an opportunity to take on the role of carer and mentor. she'll teach him how to use his powers! she'll guide him in what he needs to do, while he's so lost in his own suffering. sure she provides warmth and affection - but more importantly, she directs sam towards a mission, a cause for good.

she's an incredible character to pair off with sam, a character full of hope and belief that his faith might amount to something (i'm thinking of the start of s11 here - sam desperate to believe his prayers are being answered by god. only to discover it was lucifer all along) he wants to be like joan of arc - he wants the voice of heaven commanding and guiding him along a path of heroism. it's his hope and faith that make him vulnerable.

ruby takes on sam like she's a cult recruiter preying on a victim! like if you go through the stages of cult indoctrination: deception (check! she tricks him into breaking the final seal by killing lilith!), isolation (check! sam having to keep his activities w ruby a secret, driving a wedge between him and dean, eventuating in their separation), induced dependency (check! a blood addiction!). by the end of it, he's left abandoned by his loved ones, alone and entirely reliant on her and the purpose she's given him.

but luckily - sam is a character who hates being controlled above all else, so he does not have his Midsommar (2019) May Queen moment. even when he does let lucifer in, he does so as a sleeper agent. he holds onto his independent spirit to the end :")

tldr; ruby loves sam as a devotee loves their holy mission. sam begrudgingly accepts ruby, not as the divine guidance he wants, but the only one that'll speak to him.

[destieltaggedfic]

Hiiii. I was wondering if you knew any fics dean dates cas because he feels bad for him or the other way around. I don't really know if thats your thing but i thought i might as well try

Interesting ask. Genuinely sorry this has taken so long. I think I've been putting this off because the fic that immediately springs to mind is The Girlfriend Experience and for whatever reason I've been avoiding re-reading it (to the point of deleting it off my kindle) since I started reading destiel fic again.

The way I'm reading this ask is one of them taking the other out on a date/s while they are not in or intending to be in a genuine relationship.

The Discovery Series - DC_Derringer   Ao3

Set S6ish.  When he discovers and reads Destiel fanfic, Cas decides that the authors are right and he is in love with Dean.  With Sam’s help he gets Dean to agree to a single date, one that is as platonic as Dean can make it.  When they start hanging out in similar scenarios, the angel is confused as to what their relationship actually is  

Word Count: 13k                              Graphic Sexual Acts

Canticles - 2street2car   Ao3

Set S5.  The brothel was a bust, so if he can’t get Cas laid, Dean will at least show him what a good date is like.

Word Count: 10k                              No Sex

The Girlfriend Experience - rageprufrock   Ao3

Set S5 AU.  Cas’ powers are starting to fail and is doing more human things.  Feeling bad that its his fault Cas is no longer 100% angel, Dean is helping to show him the human things he needs and if it looks like a relationship from the outside its obviously not going to last anyway and he’d like it if Sam stopped talking about it.

Word Count: 15k                              Graphic Sexual Acts

Fear of Falling – JulzSnape   Ao3

Set S9 AU.  Having watched too many romantic movies now he’s human, Cas is curious about dating.  Dean doesn’t know how to explain dates so offers to take Cas on a date to show him what its like knowing that Cas deserves good things for a change.

Word Count: 9k                                 No Sex

[ananke-xiii]

About Asa, Lily and Tasha (and Kelly).

There’s the experience of watching SPN by chronological order of the released episodes and the experience of watching it by specific writer and, as I once said, the latter is just a much better experience. I still stand by that. Incidentally, I think that this is one of the many reasons why the show went on for so long: since apparently writers rarely reached a consensus on the story and the characters’ internal coherence within a season, there’s a little bit for everyone’s tastes.

For instance, Steve Yockey’s episodes for s12 are a thing of Supernatural beauty. First of all I think Yockey was like “fuck the BMoL storyline AND I’m taking the boys out of that damn bunker” and I thank him for that. Secondly, he must have set his mind on weaving the (“bad”? “unconventional”? “simply flawed human”?) mother/(definitely absent)(surely dead) father central theme of the season with the “old” theme of human body/vessel/possession. And it’s sooooo great!

Asa Fox, Lily Sunder and Tasha Banes are the protagonists of his MoTW episodes and they’re such interesting characters! Two of them die at the very beginning of their respective episodes (the very parents of Alicia and Max, what a year for them, uh? Yockey you cruel, cruel man), while only one of them has her need fulfilled (well, more or less, although one might argue that the irony of Cas having his own son killed by God himself might be considered a sort of “karma’s a bitch” for him and a “win” for Lily).

Asa Fox is the absent father par excellence because well, he’s dead AND because we don’t know if he’s ever got to be a father or not. Jael says that Alicia and Max were too “frightened” to say that they came to say goodbye to their daddy and why would they be? Was it a secret? Lorraine didn’t know so I must assume yes. But… why? We don’t know. Lorraine is the “bad” mother who sabotaged her son’s gear and hid his gear and was generally unhappy about his son’s life choices. But Asa was also taunted by a possessive demon, Jael, who was probably in love with him (“Tell them what you took from me. Asa was mine”). Or maybe, as Lily Sunder would’ve put it, Jael was “obsessed” with him.

Now what I like about this episode is that Yockey was like: “I’ll remind you people that demons can actually be exorcised, you know? It might not always end well but hunters can and should at least fucking try”. By having Jael possess Jody (“this meatsuit you all seem to care so much about”), a beloved character, we’re reminded that possessed people are, you know, still people. Maybe dead people, though, but still, you should check, at least. And so the hunters try and succeed in exorcising the demon and all’s well that ends well (I mean, more or less, people still died but, you know, glass half full, man).

This dialogue between Sam and Mary is particularly delicious:

Mary: What are you doing?! She’s a demon. We kill demons. Sam: No, but she’s Jody.

Mary and demons… well, let’s say that I don’t exactly judge her when she forgets that demons are also possessing (possibly dead) people. But I like how her cold-bloodedness reveals the brothers’ hypocrisy (there’s something similar in this scene in s11 with Sam and Dean arguing about the vesselness (lol) of Cas).

Lily Sunder agrees with mother Mary: she kills angels. To be honest, I don’t judge her too, in her shoes I’d personally set the world on fire, but she does say “she is no threat whatsoever to humans” and she doesn’t want to hurt Sam and Dean, what with them being humans and all. Too bad that she does kill humans who are currently being possessed by angels. Oooopsie! Ishim didn’t teach her how to exorcise them, I guess (S4 was crazy for that, they established the idea that angels could be exorcised and then boom, forever forgotten).

I’m telling all this because it's Yockey’s writing that’s pointing it out. The episode starts off with Lily killing Benjamin and, a few scenes later, Cas tells this:

Cas: Benjamin is always very careful. Long ago, he found a powerfully devout vessel in Madrid, and her faith, it... she gave him everything – her trust and her body. Dean: Wait. So Benjamin's a woman. Cas: Benjamin is an angel. His vessel is a woman. But it – it's – it's more than that. She's not just his vessel. Sam: She's... She's his friend. Cas: Yeah. Benjamin would never put her in unnecessary danger.

So Lily killed Benjamin, the angel AND the “powerfully devout from Madrid” who’s first described as a vessel, a body, then as a woman, then again as “more than that/not just a vessel” and ultimately as a friend (with a romantic undertone to the word). So we GOTTA ask: when is a human being just a body? And when a vessel? Are there “vessels” and “not just [some angel’s]vessel”? And Lily Sunder, who’s a professor of Apocalyptic Literature and has sold her soul for Enochian magic surely knows that angels can be exorcised regardless of Ishim’s lessons in Angel Studies. But no, she wants to kill them, like send-them-to-The-Empty-kill them and, in so doing, I think she’s aware she’s also killing other humans in the process.

(can angels even be killed when they're not in a vessel?)

Paradoxically, this episode shows a Cas that’s very much “careless” about his “vessel-not vessel" and who's in contrast with the care his former brothers-in-arms extend to their vessels/friends. While Benjamin “wouldn't put himself in harm's way if he could help it.” and Mirabel and Ishim were not “careless” with their vessels, Cas is “impressed” that they have “kept [their]vessels all this time”. And isn’t it telling that’s Cas that uses the word “vessel” while Ishim says “but you, Castiel... I liked the old you better”? He doesn't say "your old vessel", he precisely says the "old you". Of course, Ishim's implying that Cas has changed etc, but I like when characters speak about vessels and everybody just sort of means different things.

First of all, just like Asa Fox’s death was foreshadowing Cas’death, Yockey is, again, foreshadowing Cas’ demise by the end of the season: he will be careless and he will put himself in harm’s way and he will die because of it. I used the word “paradoxically” before because Cas’ vessel is both a vessel and kind of Cas’ human (?) body. His “carelessness” cost everything to Jimmy Novak and the angel made a promise to him, twice, and yet he seems to be absolutely disconnected from corporeal reality to the point that he would easily throw himself in harm’s way without thinking. Benjamin wouldn’t do that. Hell, not even Ishim-Who-Hates-Humans would ever do that to his vessel (also, let’s bear in mind that possessed people suffer A.LOT. but also maybe let’s do like the show does and never go there again or we’ll just get ugly sad).

Going back to Lily Sunder, a character defined by her being a scholar and a mother. We don’t know anything about May’s father, but we do know that he’s NOT an angel (this is like the plot-twist of the episode). Akobel is the stand-in father/protector who, guess what? Dies! (just like Cas will die to protect his/not biologically his baby who’s also The Nephilim Of All Time after possibly Jesus himself, that depends if we consider him a Nephilim or not).

Ishim is in love with Lily (or so he thinks) but, just like Jael, he’s actually “obsessed” with her. He’s also convinced that Lily has “thrown him away" for Akobel, Akobel, who’s an angel but, we’re reminded, also a vessel (“Dispose of his vessel” Ishim says).

So what do we learn from absent/dead father/hunter Asa and vengeful/killer mother/scholar Lily's stories? Well, first of all that having a supernatural being as your stan will result in certain death, if not yours, the death of one of your loved ones. Which is a funny juxtaposition to Ishim's words: "You know why we're meant to stay away from them humans? Hmm? It's not because we're a danger to them. They're a danger to us". Second of all, angels and demons get quite possessive (haha I keep making this joke about possession I should stop) but this is not the rule, Benjamin represents the exception and, to a lesser degree, Ishim and Mirabel too. Believe it or not, angels have a vested interest in keeping their vessels alive and well, Cas is the only one who doesn't understand that and just keeps putting himself in harm's way.

What about Tasha Banes? Well, she's the one who's dealt with the "possession by another human being" card and I don't know if I can say that's the worst but yeah, it's the worst.

Tasha is a hunter, a witch and the mother of Alicia and Max. She seems like the cool mom, à la Lorelai Gilmore but we as audience are left to decide whether Alicia's anxiety is justified ("Mom usually checks in with us, but she's sort of disappeared") or if Max's right ("She did not disappear. She's busy.").

She is killed by an unnamed borrower witch who had made a deal with a demon and lost her soul as a consequence (not the same as Lily Sunder, but here we are again with the whole soul-thing). The witch wanted Tasha to take the deal upon herself, Tasha rejects it so she kills her and transforms her in a sort of creepy doll. The witch "possesses" Tasha and makes her a doll, a not-real but resembling body that acts and speaks like one. Soulless, bodyless, this Tasha creature is basically a memory.

Stripped of her sould and her body, Tasha (and later Alicia since Creature Tasha dies together with the borrower witch) is a puppet controlled by her master that will die when her master will.

She basically represents, imo, what all these anonymous meatsuits/vessels/not so much vessels/bodies are in the narrative: they're empty and unimportant unless they're contained by a powerful being or if they are loved and cared about by the hunters hunting these "things". And even the love of these hunters is not enough to spare this horrendous fate to these people: Max, a witch and a hunter, will eventually make the deal and transform Alicia into a "doll".

And I'm sorry but I cannot but think that this is not a coincidence if I think that the "doll" of s12 narrative is yet another mother, Kelly Kline, the point where the themes of motherhood and that of body/vessel/possession converge. She is THE VESSEL of the season, useful because she must give birth to the Nephilim and then easily discarded by the narrative. "Dispose of her vessel", Ishim might say of her.

Steve Yockey really understood the assignment.

Twigs and twine and Kelly Kline.

[profoundbondfanfic]

Another day, another list of aro/ace/demi fics for you to enjoy!

Part 3

Aces by Flatcoke [Teen, 32K, Ace!Cas]

The first time he comes into the shop Dean is pretty sure he is a hallucination brought on by his dry spell and accompanying month-long porn fest. He has seen this guy’s whole profile. He’s seen the whole profile so maybe his brain automatically imagines his face on every dark-haired guy he sees now. Or in which Dean's newest patron also happens to be his favorite porn star, and how is going to get through grad school when all his blood has headed down south?

Like An Old Fashioned Song by MayQueen517 [General 2,2K, Aro!Dean, Ace!Cas]

Dean wishes he could have said more; but what can you say when you feel at odds with everything? === If pressed, Dean thinks he’d say that Cas is everything from partners to family to a best friend, and everything in between.

like january by sharkfish [Explicit, 8K, Ace!Cas]

“I told you that I’m asexual,” Cas says, “and that’s true, but I’ve always understood myself to be more gray-asexual than purely asexual. That means --” “I know what it means,” Dean says, letting out the breath he was holding. “I haven’t been attracted to someone in so long, the distinction no longer seemed to be relevant.” “Nothing can change the way I feel about you,” Dean says. “Nothing.” Cas looks down at his hands. “Sometimes I think I may be attracted to you.”

Grooming Instincts by jemariel [Explicit, 26K, Demi!Cas]

There's something going on with Cas. Dean is determined to help him through it, in whatever way he can. He might end up with more than he bargained for. OR: Dean helps Cas scratch an itch. As it were.

spinning verse by sharkfish [Mature, 5K, Ace!Cas]

“Listen up!” Dean hollers, louder than necessary in the small space. “We are spinnin’ this bottle, and then we’re going to do some kissin’! Happy New Year!”

Intangible by tiamatv [Explicit, 13,9K, Demi!Cas]

“Hey, Cas,” Dean called out. He dropped his keys into the bowl by the doorway, pushed up both sleeves of his shirt, and let the door swing closed behind him. It’d no sooner clicked closed than he felt something cool brush the side of his cheek and a slip of wind around his waist, a hint of pressure against his back that he could barely feel through his flannel and his jeans. Hello, Dean, Castiel wrote, with the delicate scratch of an invisible fingernail across the flat of Dean’s palm.

For Science by shiphitsthefan [Explicit, 6K, Demi!Cas]

“Think of it like an experiment," says Dean. "You’re testing a hypothesis as to whether or not a desirable response can be achieved through the stimulation of the anus via the application of a willing volunteer’s muscular hydrostat.” Cas raises an eyebrow. “Are you actually trying to use the scientific method to talk me into letting you lick my asshole?”

[crowley-the-1-true-king-of-hell]

Screaming with excitement right now

Crowley in season 8x07 was willing to knife fight Castiel. That was when he assumed Cas’ was too weak to use the full smite of his angel powers

I love it, because Crowley does not underestimate Cas in anyway. Crowley has always had a healthy appreciation for Cas’ abilities, so Crowley is more than aware of how BAMF Cas is at knife to knife fighting. Yet Crowley believed he had a chance, which shows that Crowley is pretty BAMF himself

I won’t lie, I think Cas would win in a “fight until one is knocked out” type situation. Cas is millions of years old and a soldier, it is highly unlikely Crowley would be better than him, and I just “yeah sure lol” whenever Dean is made to be more skilled than Cas? like what are the directors smoking? Dean is skilled but he doesn’t have millions of years of experience. Or if Cas only began fighting when humans were created, then thousands of years

But do I think Crowley could have put up a good enough fight, with his cunning, to stun Cas for just long enough to teleport away with Kevin and the tablet?

The answer is yes. It takes 7 milliseconds to snap your fingers. He needs to use cunning long enough to have that 7 milliseconds. Don’t get me wrong Cas would absolutely kick Crowley’s arse in any fight, even a non power fight where it’s just melee vs melee but I do think Crowley has enough skill to buy himself 7 milliseconds and that is an incredible feat, because Cas has way more experience even if he didn’t have powers, which he did

So why didn’t Crowley teleport with Kevin and the tablet while Cas was doing his light show? We know from 7x23 that Crowley doesn’t need to touch an item or people to teleport them

The answer I believe is this:

originally Crowley thought Cas didn’t have enough powers. The light show made him think okay maybe I was wrong. Originally he thought he just needed to stun Cas long enough to get him, the tablet and Kevin out and Cas wouldn’t be able to follow because he wasn’t in good shape

Cas was able to bluff well enough to make Crowley believe he was fine and if we remember from 5x10 Cas can follow Crowley’s teleportation energy like how he followed Crowley to his house, even though Crowley teleported before him 

So if you already know the angel can follow your teleportation signature, and you guess that they still have some power left in them to follow you, what would be the point? Fold your cards and try again. You can risk teleporting away, but if the angel follows you they might not give you an advantage of warning you with a light show next time

[an-android-in-a-tutu]

Listen, you can come up with any number of things Dean might have done offscreen to help cas and prevent him from being homeless, no evidence against it, or like in some cases, directly contradicting what we see on screen, sure whatever. I actually think it makes more sense if Dean gave Cas enough to keep him afloat for a while, because like while you and I can agree that sleeping on the floor of a gas station isn't great, it's a fuckin monumental achievement for a guy who has literally nothing to his name and no experience with human society. It honestly makes more sense if he got some help.

Sure, fine.

Doesn't change the fact that he got turned out of the warded bunker where his well equipped hunter friends lived when there are angels hunting him down to kill him.

Like Cas died that episode. He only survived because Sam and Dean showed up for a last minute save and Gadreel healed him. Whatever reason Dean gives him in the moment, and however understandable his justification after the fact, he is choosing, explicitly, to let Cas face this alone, to risk Cas dying because of it.

And whatever, you know. It's a terrible choice on the guys being forced to make terrible choices show. Risk your friend's life to prevent your brother from almost certainly dying. The whole point is not being able to find a solution that saves everybody and we can work around the writers kinda doing a shit job at closing off other options.

But to pretend that that isn't going to have a long term effect on Dean and Cas' relationship is like. Ridiculous. For one thing, fucking up the relationships is half the point of forcing a character to make a choice like this. Cas probably spent months thinking that just the inconvenience or potential threat he posed by staying was enough to make helping him not worth it, and that doesnt just evaporate when he finds out the real reason. And yeah, Cas' survival odds were probably better than Sam's in that moment, but the choice was still: which of your loved ones are you gonna save? And Dean didn't choose Cas.

I'm sure he understands and accepts that, but not having it affect the way he sees their relationship would be even worse writing than having Dean do it to him in the first place.