#dcc incorrect quotes
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mongo-the-liensis · 5 months ago
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Mordecai: There are three ways to handle a difficult situation. The right way, the wrong way, and the Carl way.
Katia: Isn't that the wrong way?
Mordecai: Yes, but it's faster.
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waterkangaroo · 5 months ago
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Orren: I can't believe you assassinated an admin!
Carl: Well, 'assassinated' implies it was politically motivated. I killed her because she was a dick, so technically I murdered her
Orren: That's not better!
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washed-up-wurmcoil · 1 month ago
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Katia Grimm to Huanxin Jinx: You're not mommy! You'll never be mommy! You don't know the first thing about mommy!
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mongo-the-liensis · 7 months ago
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Hekla: Why are you guys acting like this?
Carl: Oh, we're not acting. We really are like this.
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mongo-the-liensis · 5 months ago
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The AI, about Carl: I could fix them, but honestly whatever the hell is wrong with them is way funnier.
Carl: That's literally what all the gods think about me.
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mongo-the-liensis · 5 months ago
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*Safehome Yolanda is on a hike on the sixth floor*
Katia: It’s beautiful out here.
Imani: And quiet.
Elle: Too quiet.
Daniel: Did we lose someone?
*Cut to Carl beating a hunter to death*
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mongo-the-liensis · 5 months ago
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Li Na: You're a loose cannon, Louis.
Louis: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?
Katia: I think you play by your own rules.
Imani: No way, he thinks rules were made to be broken.
Li Na: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.
Louis: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. Carl is a loose cannon.
Carl: [causes several explosions]
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mongo-the-liensis · 1 year ago
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Carl: Whose turn is it to give the pep-talk?
Imani: *sighing* Elle's.
Elle: Fuck shit up out there, but don’t die.
Donut: *wiping away a tear* So inspirational.
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mongo-the-liensis · 1 year ago
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Imani: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?
Katia: Several traffic violations.
Carl: Three counts of resisting arrest.
Daniel: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.
Elle: Also, that’s not our car.
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mongo-the-liensis · 1 year ago
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Carl: You know the sound a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That's the sound that my brain makes all the time
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mongo-the-liensis · 5 months ago
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*During the Christmas Party on the Eighth Floor*
Britney: Are you drunk?
Louis: Only on the spirit of Christmas!
Daniel: And the spirit of whisky..
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mongo-the-liensis · 5 months ago
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Katia: What's the signal when something goes wrong?
Carl: We yell, 'oh shit.'
Mordecai: ...That'll work.
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mongo-the-liensis · 5 months ago
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Li Na: Is anyone going to tell me what's going on in here?!
Katia: It's kind of complicated, but Carl-
Li Na: Got it. Forget I asked.
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mongo-the-liensis · 1 year ago
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Louis: Are we fighting or flirting?
Anybody: I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck-
Louis: Your point?
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mongo-the-liensis · 1 year ago
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Carl, about his nuke: I've got a weapon, and I'm... admittedly VERY afraid to use it!
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mongo-the-liensis · 1 year ago
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Imani: We call that a traumatic experience.
Imani, turning to Carl: Not a "bruh moment".
Imani, turning to Elle: Not "sadge".
Imani, turning to Louis: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO".
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