#dc/mlb shitpost

[ali-kitkat]

so this thought popped in my head the other day, now it wont leave me alone and so i shall grace yall with it.

Marinette, sitting in the driver's seat of Jason's car: We're going on a trip on our favorite piece of shit.

Jason joining Marinette: Going ninety-five, we're gonna fuckin' die!!!

Damian, in the back: If we crash, I am going to murder you both.

[ghostcryptid]

@someone-ev excuse my handwriting but

[aiiurus]

high school aus are not realistic because no one ever includes the hours of homework high schoolers have to do everyday

[messymessyml]

Anyway, hot take: DC now consists of AUs and maribat could exist.

When DC needs to figure out their own mess in the continuity of the DC universe, they ocassionally make a crossover comic where they attempt to reboot the entire DC universe so that they can restart from the beginning. Second, by doing so, they also introduce new innovative ideas for their story telling. They either do it by introducing different multiverses so that the stories can take place without causing a conjecture with each other. For example, Superman is a Communist in one multiverse (this is canon in one multiverse). The writers use different multiverses to tell a story.

However, when everything becomes too complicated with all of their stories turning into a giant bloody mess, they attempt to unleash a Crisis event to make sense of everything.

The First crisis attempts to get rid of multiverses as a concept and make one unified story taking place on one unified Earth.

The Second addressed continuity errors and restarted everything.

The Third reintroduces the concept of multiverses, which allowed writers to make distinct stories that took place in different multiverses without causing holes in the main continuity.

Fourth is just a mess.

Fifth sees Flash alter the DC universe by changing time, thus causing a butterfly effect on the whole DC universe. The point of that is to introduce new readers to DC comics without having to read the previous stories.

Sixth reintroduces the previous multiverses that existed before Barry Allen changed time and made each and every one of the 52 multiverses canon to the main continuity, albeit taking place on different Earths (Man…)

Seven introduces and explores the concept of Dark Multiverses as an attempt to leave room for darker and edgier storytelling. These stories explore alternate events based on what would would happen if the heroes took a different approach that inadvertently leads to disastrous ends to their respective universes.

The Eighth is the current crisis and… it’s a giant mess. The current crisis involves all the aforementioned Crises and tries to connect them with the present and establish a continuum where the previous stories are canon. However, the end result will lead to some sort of reboot.

[ali-kitkat]

Jason: Have you ever thought about what it'd be like to look God in the face and call them a bitch?

Plagg, sitting up from where he was laying: Marinette says it to me every day.

Marinette: It's true. Plagg, you're a bitch.

Jason: Pft.

[ali-kitkat]

Damian, after watching his girlfriend do something stupid: How are you alive right now?

Marinette, tired and trying her best: Oh, my love. It's through sheer spite, not on my part though. The gods have decreed me humanity's problem.

[stargazeranswers]

Damian, after a moment to remember she cares for many tiny gods: Wait, literally or figuratively?

Marinette, without hesitation: Tikki and Plagg literally ensured my birth out of spite.

Damian, after watching his girlfriend do something stupid: How are you alive right now?

Marinette, tired and trying her best: Oh, my love. It's through sheer spite, not on my part though. The gods have decreed me humanity's problem.

[ali-kitkat]

i need you to know that i choked on my own spit when reading this. how dare you be funnier than me.

Damian, after watching his girlfriend do something stupid: How are you alive right now?

Marinette, tired and trying her best: Oh, my love. It’s through sheer spite, not on my part though. The gods have decreed me humanity’s problem.