#day 3 of the Big Sad
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I didn't like every map in Inquisition, but the elven ruins were some of the best parts of it. Sometimes I think about how Suledin Keep was laid out where you're running through this kind of mazelike environment and then you can glance up at one point and there's this GIANT dread wolf statue watching you from the mountains. that was neat. Arlathan has giant statues too but imo they aren't framed in a very fantastic way where you can get startled like that. and where are the elven prayer puzzles. why can we not show our obeisance to the Evanuris with logic and whimsy :<
I loved Suledin Keep as well!
Especially since, by that point, you've fought your way through red templar camps and the giant behemoths to get to the *heart* of the operation at Suldein. There are red templars, rifts, the people/quarry operation, and then you get to the Keep and, like you said, there's that cool moment where you look up and the Dread Wolf is just LOOMING over you (like Solas in the story!).
Something that really appealed to me with this world was the tangible sense of the past, the consequences of decisions made ages ago, looming over you - the Blights, the Ancient Elves, the Dwarven Empire, Tevinter...the world never let you forget it.
And that's the whole game of DAI - wherever you go there's always traces of the people that came before you, unable to swept away by time or conquerors...and sometimes those people claw their way back to the present like Corypheous or Solas. In Ferelden you find traces of the Avaar and Chasind, In Orlais you find the remnants of the Elves, the Western Approach is dotted with Old Tevinter outposts and the Wardens, and the Hissing Wastes/Storm Coast with the dwarven ruins on the surface! I loved discovering every inch of those maps (large as they were lmao) and it added so much to the world. It made the world feel large! It added to the idea that this world had so much mystery to it - so much lost history.
And Arlathan?
It's a maze, not in a good way, but because parts are cut off only to be opened 'when allowed', and not like in Inquisition where there was a rock-slide or you needed a bridge etc... You're boxed in with glowing doors that tell you 'not now come back later' or water that instantly drowns you, and it's hard to not be taken out of the experience when the game is so very upfront with you that you are not supposed to explore until we say you can.
This game doesn't reward exploration, it has fast travel spots all over the place that seem to discourage it once you find an area. Camps in Inquisition were spread out over large maps but sparingly used in comparison - it still made certain that you explored the world to find new things on your journey from a to b. The quests train you to fast travel, to get to where you need to go - kill, talk, repeat. The game teaches you to look out for crap to break and so my eyes are rooted firmly on the ground because of it. The game can look gorgeous at times, but it doesn't feel like it wants me to look at it too hard, like it will break the illusion of this game lmao.
It's a personal opinion, of course, but my experience with this game was that it made the world smaller, less interesting, and devoid of that mystery and reverence that made this series so compelling. Like you said, there are some cool visuals like those giant statues in Arlathan, but everything else in the map is so condensed and twisting on each other that it's hard to notice them naturally while playing the game.
'Why can we not show our obeisance to the Evanuris with logic and whimsy'
That would be so cool! I can get Andruil's alter having a hunting test - like with the Vir Tanadhal (the way of three trees), which is a hunting philosophy the Dalish have relating to Andruil who is the Goddess of the Hunt. That makes sense - you show deference to her by hunting according to her way.
...but for all of them?
It's a game design choice, I get that -> make it simple, keep it the same...it goes with the repetitive combat and exploration loop of this game. But they really lost out on showing us how the Evanuris differ to each other - how each of them had their own little 'aspect' they had dominion over in accordance to their lore. Why not have a little puzzle for June, God of the Craft? A riddle for Dirthamen, God of Secrets? Have some sort of brazier lighting puzzle for Sylaise, the Hearthkeeper, who gave the elven people fire?
From what we learn in DAI with the veilfire and temple of Mythal we know that they were massively egotistical assholes for the most part, some way more than most. They had their own temples, their own valaslin, their own mythology/legends...giving them all the same prayer puzzle is pretty dull when you consider how different they all are and the efforts they went to to distinguish them. Not that you'd really know in this game - for a game about the 'Elven Gods' there's very little discussion about the rest of them.
But, yeah, to sum it all up: Elven ruins in Inquisition were gorgeous, encouraged you to explore and interact with the lore with veilfire runes, and gave you some gorgeous set pieces like with the giant Dread Wolf statue in Suledin. Inquisition may not have been everyones cup of tea, totally get that, but for me it really captured the wonder of Thedas - the depth of its history...datv unfortunately did not.
#this applies to the whole game! the necropolis / rivain / tevinter...it's all so small - so limiting! Kirkwall feels bigger to me. KIRKWALL#i know i post this a lot but visual design in dai was peak for the series - it's still the most gorgeous game imo#one of my fav areas was the Frostback Basin - it had that 'just before sunset' lighting and then it turned to night with the aurora's...ahh#also all of Trespasser/Descent! literally every location we went to in those dlcs had such a cool vibe to it <3#anyway this turned out really long sorry about that - but i've never been more aware I was playing a video game than with datv#inquisition isn't the perfect game but I love how it made the world feel big! datv made it feel very small in comparison.#obligatory 'its just my opinion' - if you like this game then cool! don't come at me lmao#I initially found the datv gameplay/exploration loop to be fun at first but it lost its charm fairly quickly#more sad/resigned about veilguard now - i have a few posts I'd been writing and editing but no desire to post them :[#thanks for the ask! <3#datv critical#veilguard critical
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what gets me about the shadow/maria dynamic is that it takes the trope of "weak helpless girl dies for a tragic plot device" and subverts it
Maria wasn't helpless in her fate. She did have a choice. Shadow would have been strong enough to protect them both (Where else could they even go? Would he need to hurt someone?) but instead she made a choice to protect Shadow.
Shadow's story isn't tragic because he failed to protect Maria and now spends the rest of his life tormented over it. Shadow's story is tragic because he is the strongest creature alive, but raw power isn't always enough, and his loving friend made a sacrifice to let him go hoping she was giving him a chance to learn compassion because she was strong!
Maria's purpose isn't that she's a weak little girl who dies. Maria's legacy is that she protects the strongest creature alive, and teaches it the strength of love.
Her character gives the moment purpose, not the other way around. Her willingness to die so he can go free, asking him to use his strength to protect the people of Earth, despite everything. It's her proof of love that gives Shadow's burden that kind of extreme weight. Shadow will live forever and with so much limitless power, would life be easy to discard without a second thought? Not Maria's. Not when she asked him to protect it. That weight will remind him, always.
#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#maria robotnik#sonic movie 3#ill just be really super bummed if they miss the point of her death ig#dont dismiss her as just the sad little girl who gets killed and decide that isnt good enough for her character#it can mean SO much if you are big brained. dont waste the moment by pretending it shouldnt happen#i love “maria lives" aus. i will eat that shit up ALL DAY#but THEY feel so good because i know THIS is what she did for him. this is how much she loved him#ok?
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🏘️
#ok besties please pray for me about the following things:#1) i just got home from my grandpa's funeral and can we pretend you knew the whole time and don't need to say anything#for whatever reason it is not something i'm wanting to process online or even really with in person friends#all's well and he's with the Lord and the funeral itself was gorgeous#but there's various pain and grieving in the family and also the family time gave me a good bit to think about#2) i have 8 days before visiting family ~again~ for a bridal shower in ohio#and leading up to this trip i was sick and the trip was moderately exhausting#and i'm feeling more and more urgently the need to actually let my body rest but the obstacles are constant#and during those 8 days i need to do a great deal of dissertation writing and editing#plus you know. easter#3) i just got sent an apartment listing for where i am moving and it feels real and pressureful in a new way#both the stress of should i go for this one do i want to deal with the problems?#and the sadness of committing to something new and letting go of here.#both those things i believe will be helped by me getting inside and eating dinner so i will be doing that soon#on the praise side this puts me close to some of my grandpa's siblings#who were all at the funeral and so excited for me#i really really love and admire that side of the family more the more i know them#they were also a really big family and very hardworking and faithful and! good at celebrating together!#ok that's all i love you guys. if there's any week to be processing big questions and having a funeral it's holy week
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"From triumph to failure is but one step."
+ the usual
I love when I can include paper sketches in the process gif. It's very satisfying to see it progress from a very vague imagining of what was in my head to the finished project.
+ version without text

My favorite sketch was definitely the one where I actually put in words what it's supposed to convey. I wouldn't usually write that down, cause it's all in my head, but it was useful to do so when sending it to other people. I'll go into it more but here it is just as a teaser:

Lmao first of all, I like how I was teasing "Spanish GP" art, but as per usual, it's just thinly veiled au art. IM SORRY, I'M NOT INTERESTED IN MAKING GENERAL POSTERS, THAT'S NO FUN! So instead you will get weirdly relevant matador au art. I like it a lot though, I was really shocked I was able to draw 3 different Fernandos, I mean even drawing one figure takes a lot out of me, but this was weirdly easy?? I think it's just the effect of not being burnt out anymore, and actually being able to draw with more ease makes me feel like a god.
Okay, so the text: "Fight or Flight?" I'll be honest, I don't even remember why I chose it, literally came to me in a vision 😭 But I think it's fitting with the narrative of this piece. Is it better to keep going on, keep fighting, or better to finally give up, and flee? Not that I even remotely think he should give up, but I feel like sometimes I can sense him pondering this very question. That was the big fear before he announced that he re-signed. Keep fighting and maybe, just maybe, you'll get the chance to finally go up against the bull again. Or accept it's an uphill battle and the fighting is going to keep getting more and more strenous, and maybe it's time to put down the sword. SORRY THIS IS SO ANGSTY FOR WHAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE "yayyyy home race!!!" Please forgive me <3

I. Renault
At some point, someone pointed out to me that I had drawn all other iterations of matador Fernando with a sword, except for Renault Fernando, and that ended up feeling very poignant to me. In a bull fighting match, they really only pull out the sword at the last minute to deliver the killing blow. So I think it's important to never draw this Fernando with a sword, because it shows the unfailing confidence and stability he has at that point. He only needs to pull out the sword at the end, as a formality almost, there's no reason for him to keep his guard up at all times.

II. Ferrari
Meanwhile this Fernando, he's considering his sword like he hasn't had to in the past. He's checking the sharpness, making sure in advance he can do what needs to be done. He's on guard, he feels like he needs to keep up his defenses at all times because he doesn't have that same amount of trust and stability anymore. He knows though he will be up against the (red) bull, at least that's never in question. At least there's the assurance he'll get the chance to fight.

III. Aston
Oh, Aston Fernando....He doesn't know whether to take up his sword or finally put it down for the last time. While at least Ferrari Fernando knows he's on constant guard against the bull, this Fernando doesn't even have that assurance anymore. He feels like he can never put down the sword, just in case he gets the chance to strike the killing blow on the bull, which feels like it's growing more and more unlikely.
Spanish flag: ? Lmao this was meant to be something to celebrate Fernando's home race and it turned very introspective whoops. Also got the Napoleon quote in there hahaha, can't escape it!! Shame though there is no French gp anymore, if so I'd probably draw an unhinged thing for it :,(
#woooo yeah totally a spanish gp poster sure sure.....#idk i cant pretend to be relevant. i just wanted to draw matadors bcs it was spain gp wknd#maybe next year ill draw him as the prince of asturias#very proud of the narrative of this though#I do think it's very relavant to the story of his career and his relationship to the spanish gp#see i even downloaded a special font! sdjkglr#also do let me know which is your fav Nando on this poster!!!! <3#even tho the aston nando is lowkey the reason behind this whole poster. im super smitten with renault nando#i wonder which fernando would be 'freeze'#also i swear one day im gonna accidentally stab myself with the big ass sword i use to take ref pics for matador au#HOPE THIS ISNT TOO SAD EVEN THO I KNOW IT IS!!!#i mean it was never really supposed to be triumphant. more just *heavy thoughts*#but the lacklustre results and the fact that i feel like i havent even seen nando that much this wknd fueled the depressing read more#i am not immune to being overly dramatic and angsty </3#hey you never know man maybe this will work as reverse psychology and he'll do well in a couple hours!! we'll see...#f1#formula 1#fernando alonso#catie.art.#matador au#2024 spanish gp#fa14
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For anyone else who is gonna struggle surviving the next 3 weeks with the angsty and tense situation of Callowmoore here's a few things from the last 2 episodes that I feel were underrated and will assist in trying to keep me sane/emotionally stable: - Matching messed up hands built for holding - Fearne nervously playing with her hair as she approaches Ashton - Ashton wanted Fearne to be either the last thing they saw if they died or the first thing they saw when they succeeded - Fearne's admittance corroborates Ashley's 4SD revelation that Fearne is in love with someone in the party but doesn't know how to process the emotions - Fearne wanted Ashton to be happy, while Ashton wanted to feel whole so they would be worthy of the Hells - Ashton twice tried to lead a search for Fearne, and instantly clocking onto Chetney saying he followed Fearne - Fearne making herself look as radiant as possible before giving Ashton the cold shoulder - Ashton only rose to Chetney's provocations until he said 'You hurt Fearne' Use how you will
#godspeed my poor damaged psyche#critical role#bells hells#callowmoore#ashton greymoore#fearne calloway#fearne x ashton#ashton x fearne#strangely enough I don't enjoy having a dark and sad pit sitting in my chest day to day#3 weeks and we don't even get a cute M9 reunion in between to distract us? this was worse than Callowmoore's sistergate 3 week wait#also 'a little'? Sweetie people don't jump into lava for a little you got the big L and it's not Lesbian(s)#Feel like Laudna was a bit cruel this ep (Ash has been there for her a ton and she kinda villainized him) but we'll put it down to Delilah#much of Ashton's trauma has been overlooked or left to them to internalize but still nobody has told them that they are loved#and Ashton Greymoore needs to be told they're loved! (by Fearne)#but yeah time for more positive mental scenarios that 99% won't happen (but when that 1% does ho boy)#couldn't have just had Fearne go 'no talking' and sleep on Ash's chest to hear their heartbeat as her touch soothes Ash's pain could we?#or final fight scenarios where Ludinus is a walking harness and Ashton tricks them into absorbing their titan powers so he'd explode#they could've even had a talk in the woods because they wanted to find her so bad but was not gonna test Imogen's patience#I for one though will have at least one where Ashton seeks out Mori for advice (Fearne too but separately)#Tal I need you to use all your romantic arsenal in the feywild (Percy's worst travel experience) to win back Ashley's beautiful faun girl#bonus prompts for 'You will always be perfect to me' and 'Promise you'll come back to me' they pop up often in my scenarios#taliesin jaffe#ashley johnson
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Saw a post on main and went "someone make this happen" and I thought "wait I can make it happen" so I did :d
#myart#bowuigi#bowser#luigi#magnet#magnetpose#magnet bowuigi#ship art#this was a very high effort funny#i looked it up last night and someone had the same idea and posted it before me like 3 days ago its big sad but also yes spread the love#they are singing to each other while bowser burns down kingdoms#shoutout to the person who said “do it” when i posted about it you motivated me lots
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KHIII Chapter 35 (Eng): https://www.mediafire.com/file/x9bwpgt8ucsswr3/KH3_Ch35.zip/file Chapter List
I think this is the first time where Gangan Online and I made the same decision about what's the most iconic moment from the chapter XD.
#kingdom hearts 3#kingdom hearts manga#kh manga#keyblade graveyard#sora#kairi#lea#axel#xion#roxas#saix#xemnas#sound effects for days#358/2 days to be exact#the manga sure doesn't seem to dwell much#for the record I always try to edit out the sound effects completely but I'll still try to put the English replacements in the same places#semi transparent sound effects are both easy and difficult#'cause they show what's behind them so I know what to put there#but they also mess with the edges of shapes & lines and make tones and especially gradients difficult to match#it's very satisfying to put the English sounds back in afterwards though 'cause it shows off the most of my edit work#I'm very sad the “DN”s on page six were opaque 'cause the edit job I did was pretty good for how big the “ド”s were
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When the sun hits
i've always wanted to do an emo dog friend piece -w-
#emo dog art -w-#it feels good that i finally Can -w-#ive learned so much about interaction and drawing and scenes like#this took me a few hours and a few years ago it would have taken DAYS#im happy i can draw emo dogs -w-#wish i still had....... deviantart -w-#sad </3#emo dog#emo dog art#emodog#furry#sparkledog#canine#k#my art#clip studio paint#digital illustration#my ocs#artists on tumblr#digital drawing#drawing#digital artist#nobody Ever looks through those big tags right?#theyre pretty much just attached for superstition atp LOL
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#25 baby!!! 🥳🥳🥳#tbh i didn't know what i would feel today. if i would be a little sad or not because i really liked being 24 but for two years in a row now#i haven't been sad about the fact that it's my birthday and that's something that i'm really glad about <3 especially since it continued#i had a list made in march of all the things i want to do while i'm still 24 and i did most of them so i feel quite proud of that#and for just a couple of things i didn't do (one being doing something with my hair :p) i really don't feel guilty about it or like i waste#my own time (younger me you better feel proud of me for that too. this is a big thing for us)#instead i just feel thankful that i celebrated another year and thankful for all the wonderful people in my life <3#hope all of you will have a good day too <3 sending you love <3
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MY THIRD PIECE(s) FOR @mcytblraufest !! o7
LETS DO THIS ONE LAST TIME, these are for @allusiontomemes 's fic, [ DREAMS FROM WITHIN THE CAGE ] !! we got horrors beyond comprehension, we got multiple universes, we got accidentally destroying said universes, we got desert duo- come on down and see what else is up with these guys!!
thank you allusion and @riceofthepuffedvariety you made me go insane o7
#hermitcraft#goodtimeswithscar#mumbojumbo#mcyt au fest#mcytblraufest23#i had a bigger piece planned but i have been fighting for my life to do things the last 3 days so#i have taken the L and am using the 2 quickies i drew as my big bang pieces for this fic#I WILL FINISH THE BIG ONE......... when i am up for it again vnskdfjvndf#my own hubris was indeed my downfall BUT. BUT!. i still have art for this fic so thats a win for me#also you should read this fic ive been so ill about it i am constantly thinking of aftermath situations#i have put the three of them so gently into my pocket for safe keeping#genuinely putting them in my mouth shaking them around like a dog and its chew toy#and i will be drawing more of this. i am sad that i wasnt able to finish the big piece and draw grian. but i will. i Will#lays down in bed and sleeps for 1000 years
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i finally got the last caleb 5 star that i needed!!! (and, in the process, managed to pull both of raf’s original myth cards eeeeeee (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) )
#listen i have wanted those raf cards since the game first came out last year#they’re so gorgeous and this myth is so fucking SAD i love it#but anyway!!! YAYYY HEHE >:3 caleb!!!!!! big brother!!!! :3#vvv happy#also v nice to have after the fucking day i had yesterday lmao#clari plays l&ds
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#didn't have a big party for my 30th for reasons that were partly distance and partly insecurities/depression#this year being back closer to where my people are decided to do a big party instead this weekend#my first since my 21st (which was... a struggle for also distance related reasons and may have reinforced said insecurities)#i am having to remind myself. i am doing my best none of us get to practice this life#interrupting this to say i just mindlessly slapped at a tickle on my arm only to discover it was HUGE#not the sandflies we've been getting all day but a moth or something at least a cm big! (i grabbed it and threw it away without looking)#anyway. what was i saying. having a little moment where my insecurities are coming back in the middle of the night#and i wonder if i have - again - asked for less than i truly want because i didn't feel like anyone would give the full thing to me#but the point is: i asked for something i wanted and that's something that takes practice. and the point is: i get to try again next year a#d next year and next year. and the point is: we only live this life once but it is not a short life and there will be more chances#to celebrate with the people i love. to ask for what i want. to learn to listen to what i actually want before i make myself smaller out#of habit#but i DID ask for a party and i DID ask for someone who isn't me to host it (a thing i haven't asked for since probably my 21st tbh) and#that's already growth#and it will be fun! i'm a bit sad that no one from my most recent chapter of life can be there but it's no secret that social was hard ther#so i only have 3 friends i wanted to invite anyway and all of them live several hours away#(and one of them i knew couldn't come already when i planned it - she's at a hens party - but we talked about it and decided to go ahead)#idk. really it's ok. but part of why i'm doing this is as a challenge to my own insecurities (as well as because it will be fun!) and i#really pray this year will see some of those insecurities dwindling. that i will be able to really believe that i am lovable and loved.#that's my prayer.
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tmi maybe? kind of? in tags
#owen.txt#feeling a bit sad about the state of things#so hopefully hot cocoa and hot bath will make me feel better#I’ve avoided the news all day#but a big compulsion for me is to check it like every 3 / 4 minutes#so not doing it is hard but it’s for the best
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I just know thunderbolts ao3 tag gonna piss me off bc im already seeing Yelena/Bob GET OUTTA HEREEEE
#rose talks#We’re falling back into “girls and guys just can’t be platonic friends anymore” mode these days. SAD!#it’s very clear in the tone of the movie that she began to see herself in him and grew attached to him in a big sister way.#I know this because of my special eyes < im a big sister with 3 little siblings#thunderbolts#< only main tagging for blacklist I promise 😭
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i actually don't really like the taste of salmon
look at this shit without my many shading layers
#the legend of zelda#ocarina of time#oot link#zelda au#i have been having an itch to just fuck around and draw after finishing chapter 3 so ive just been drawing and stuff#idk man i just wanna think timie grabbed arn and mf looks so stupid cuz of it#the big run was crazy this yeah and you guys got the biggest lad that day and now your photo will forever look stupid and its so sad#loz
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“I love you” “it’ll pass” okay but which one is Eddie and which one is reader bc I don’t think I’d be able to handle either outcome
okay. just. hear me out. listen. listen to this idea i don't know if i could ever put myself through the heartbreak of writing. (tw: i'm bringing up the cursed thing that is eddie's canon ending in stranger things as of right now. yes. his... very, very, very long nap.)
"i love you" = reader
"it'll pass" = eddie
...and how ironic it is, for him to have insisted so many times that it'll pass, especially after the canon events of season 4. in which you are left alone, with nothing more than a memory of him, and all you can think is how it'll never pass. the love, the grief, the pain - he lied. it won't pass. even when you finally crave it to.
#im thinking big sad thoughts right now#i was going to save this ask in case i get around to writing it one day but even conceptualizing that tore my heart out#i can't handle writing the canon events very well i just start ugly crying in the corner#thank u ily <3#mention of eddie's death? idk how to tag/tw that properly#anyways#he'd say it more jokingly and less forsaken#a self-deprecating joke that becomes a long term bit between the two of you#but it isn't very funny when he's gone and those words are all that can echo through your heart#even louder than any of the times he might have said those three little words back
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