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astrobydalia · 2 months ago

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September Observations

This post has a TW I do not allow the repost on any others platform

Something I forgot to mention in this post about 8th house synastry!! I've noticed for some reason this overlay tends to manifest more positively when the house person already has 8th house placements in their natal chart (not a guarantee tho). I feel like its because this makes the house person be more naturally in their power and the planet person no longer feels like they can have control over the house person. In these cases instead of envy the planet person feels admiration and "positive" obsession over the house person like "Im obsessed with you, queen!🥰😍🤩" kinda vibe

If Libra Moons didn’t have the ability to detach fast they could easily pass as water moons 100%. They are such hopeless romantics and love having someone to love be that friends or partners. And yes they can be codependent but only to an extent imo. I’ve seen Libra Moons actually detach surprisingly fast specially if they feel like you don’t match their energy

Im sorry but Libra Suns are not people you can count on imo. They have this very elitist/opportunistic mindset when it comes to people. They treat people based on some kind of unspoken social hierarchy they have in their minds like how successful or intelligent or interesting you appear to be for example. They'll be loyal for as long as they see benefit from associating themselves with you, otherwise they'll be distant, elusive and flighty af. Socially they appear to be super chill but they aren’t like at all, they’re very passive-aggressive and extremely judgmental of others

If you have Venusian MC/10th house (Libra or Taurus MC/10th or Venus in the 10th house), I've noticed people care what you think of them and really feel the need to make a good impression on you, specially the sex you're attracted to romantically. This placement makes people feel like your love and affection is a privilege to have, that’s why a lot of trophy wives have venusian 10th house/MC

Jupiterians (Pisces/Sagittarius but specially Sagittarius placements) are just the best people to be around tbh. Even when they have other toxic placements/energies in their charts, I’ve noticed they are ultimately all about the ✨vibes✨. They detach from negativity quite fast and avoid getting too deep into drama and controversy cause really all they want is to chill and have fun. The “no worries, bro” kinda people. The negative side of this tho is they tend to turn a blind eye when they get called out on their own issues and/or have a tendency to be dismissive when it’s time to take things seriously

^^^You’d say Venusians relate to this peaceful description too but tbh I didn’t include them cause Venusians tend to have a lot of repressed shit and are secretly all about drama (but watching it go down from afar tho)

I’ve noticed water mercury tend to be more diplomatic and charming with their words, the way they speak about things tends to be more soothing yet nebulous/confusing/cryptic. However earth mercuries are more direct and critical which makes them more prone to openly talking shit LMAO

There's a lot of posts victimizing and romanticizing Lilith in the 1st house/conjunct the ASC but I've seen this placement a lot in bullies and genuinely fraudulent people?? I've seen Lilith energy is commonly prominent in the charts of criminals too. Like idk why people act like the hate Lilith gets is ALWAYS unjustified 💀 They can truly be really dark and shady individuals that’s literally what Lilith signifies (this does not apply to everyone of courseeeeee)

Furthermore, I'm sorry to say this but prominent Lilith natives have a habit of living too much in the victim mindset and constantly make everyone else the problem as a way to justify their shitty behaviors

What I’ve noticed with Lilith natives who are not sketchy people (so just normal decent individuals) is that they have huge self-destructive and self-derogatory tendencies. They tend to become very cynical of the world, lose hope in their own value and humiliate themselves behaving in ways that are rebellious to them but make other people think the native has no self-respect

Libra/7th house Lilith tend to assume the worst in others. Envy placement. They struggle finding genuine and healthy relationships

I've noticed MC ruler in the 12th house is common in the charts of sex workers since 12th house is related to bed pleasures, secret affairs, etc

The sign that actually behaves like a child irl is Gemini. That’s why I've noticed Gemini placements always want to be the 'cool and fun parent' just like Phil Dunphy

TW: mentions of c**** abuse and s******.

I've noticed Cancer energy (Leo too but mostly cancer) is very common in the charts of p*dos, gr**mers and s*xual predators. No placement will determine someone being this way!!!

Chiron in the 1st house/conjunct the ASC/Harshly aspecting chart ruler is common in the charts of people who have or have tried to commit s******

End of TW

An underrated god complex indicator is Sun-Mercury conjunction. I can't stress enough how much these people's ego revolve around their intellect. Their entire personality to them is being the smartest person in the room

When it comes to pride and ego (Sun) fixed and mutable suns are the most likely to have a superiority complex

Mutable Suns take the most pride on their own knowledge and judgment, deeply believe they know better or have most if not all the answers. They have a tendency to often dismiss, correct or contradict others

Fixed Suns take pride in their own ‘essence’ if that make sense. They LOVE the idea of being special and irreplaceable. Feeling like there’s something intrinsically unique about them

Cardinal Suns are okay tbh. They can have other negatives but when it comes to ego theirs is usually pretty balanced I noticed. They usually take pride in their ability to level-up and improve themselves which often makes them rather competitive or in extreme cases have this heavily predatory mindset when it comes to what they want

This will not be accurate for everyone of course but when it comes to future children if you have Water/Earth moon you are most likely to have girls whereas if you have Air/Fire moon you're more most likely to have boys

Air Venus people are the most open-minded when it comes to taste in general. I've noticed they're the type to enjoy almost every music and movie genre, they can appreciate different aesthetics.... They're also the most likely to date outside their race I've seen cause they can really find beauty in all sort of features as long as it looks overall good/attractive to them. It's not that they don't have preferences, but they're type be open to being impressed and mentally stimulated

EARTH and Fire Venus people are the most selective when it comes to their taste. They know exactly what they want and like. In the case of earth Venus this can be to the point of strong reluctance to try new things. Fire Venus appear open minded cause they have this attitude of trying everything once but the usually have a very hard-set type of things they will actually commit to

Water Venus people aren't that open about their tastes. They hide or repress them cause they really tend to be into obscure or hidden stuff. If you ask them what they like, they'll give you an evasive and generic answer, specially if it's in the context of small talk

I've noticed Capricorn and Scorpio Moons have an innate understanding of the uglier sides of human nature which is what makes them pretty cynical (scorpio) and pessimistic (cap). They are hyper-aware of how most people can be bought and corrupted. This makes them AMAZING business people tho.

Aries ASC natives embody the active, wild and spontaneous stereotype more than the other aries placements. They come across as pretty chill at first but there's actually very little they won't dare to do, they love adventures

I've noticed Venusians can do really good in anything related to sales or business counseling, because they are good at estimating and promoting the value of things

I know we relate Neptune to otherworldly and glamorous vibe but all the people that I've met who made me go "wow, girl, you don't feel real" were people who had air signs in their big 3. They’re not real people, they’re concepts, I swear that’s the vibe they give me💀💀

Also, air signs in the big 3 is an underrated fame/success indicator imo. Nowadays networking is everything in order to succeed and these natives naturally attract popularity and connections SO easily. They effortlessly use their charm and likeness to gain opportunities

I once saw an observation that said Gemini risings give off dumb blonde energy and Im here to confirm it’s true, specially when Mercury is also in an air sign. This happens cause they're up in their minds all the time but this makes them appear VERY disconnected from their environment so they really just be looking like this 24/7 😀😃😄😁😆🙂 and that's why they come across as empty-headed. They also often have this manic pixie dream girl energy which results in people not taking them seriously. This is enhanced when you see that they have a tendency to get talkative about superficial or random topics but their more intelligent or deep thoughts they keep to themselves for some reason.

Taurus Moons actually are actually very very very strategic??? Other earth moons look messy af beside them. They're so grounded that they know exactly what they want, how they wanna get it and they are so sure of themselves they have no issue taking their sweet ass time with it. Every single step they take is so intentional and "organized" if that makes sense, but they pull it off as natural and spontaneous??

Also this is an obvious thing to say but Taurus Moons are so emotionally stable. They work extremely well under pressure, will literally be the calm person admist a chaos or extreme situation. I've seen Cap/Virgo moons getting triggered many times but Taurus moons???? I've known some of them for years and I've never seen them triggered EVER no matter happened which as a water moon that's fucking insane to me 😭💀💀 Like sure depending on their personality they can be more or less expressive of their feelings but its always on their own terms, they don't let other people or situations just get reactions out of them if that makes sense

I've noticed Mercury in the 4th house creates a divided and scattered family. Just like Mercury in the 10th house indicates traveling for work, Mercury in the 4th indicates traveling because of your family. The people I've seen with this placement have all of their family members scattered around the world living completely different lives

Sun-Neptune harsh aspects are very impressionable people and very easily influenced

Also, a lot of people point out Sun-Pluto aspects have like a hidden dark/toxic side to their personality but I've seen it's actually Sun-Neptune that match this description

Libra placements can potentially be very disciplined and do well in demanding and/or serious occupations like corporate, military or athletes since Saturn is exalted in Libra.

Venus in the 1st house can tend to only value the superficially good things in them (lovable, likabale, beautiful, etc) and are more concerned with the image they present rather than building a real personality deep down. This make them ignore or downplay their flaws thus not reacting well to criticism and/or when someone does not like them.

All the men that I’ve met who were actually providers and had this involved father and husband vibes always had VIRGO, taurus and cancer placements

Men with capricorn placements aren’t providers, they’re just controlling af😭😭 They will also be emotionally distant and manipulative af too if they do not have other energies in the chart to balance it out

Honestly water suns (sun in a water house natives too) fascinate me. They just go around life casually hiding who they really are like they don’t have the most intricate personality deep down. All of them have mysterious and intriguing vibes it's not just scorpio!!!

5th house placements (including vertex) will stay behaving like teenagers regardless of their age. The song "forever young" by alphaville really describes them

Neptune in the 1st house/asc are prone to attracting lots and lots of creepy individuals because they have this aura where people project all sorts of delulu and twisted shit on them. Mentally and/or emotionally unwell people feel very attached to these natives unfortunately

Leo MC/10th house really does indicate a career where you're some kind of performer. That’s why many celebrities (specially ACTORS and singers) are Scorpio risings. This can also apply to careers like politics, public speaker, standup comedian, etc. All of these involve some level of fame ofc

Cancer MC/10th house indicates being some kind of creator (cancer=birthing something new, bringing something to life). This a lot of times relate to some art form of course but it can be other things for example a friend of mine has this placement and she works in science and she told me she works in a lab with substances and materials she created herself (idk how it works but you get the idea)

Pisces Suns have a major in gaslighting from the university of never taking responsibility. This can be the case for any unevolved pisces placement but I’ve noticed the lying to your face and twisting reality is much more blatant in Pisces Suns for some reason. They make arguments in such a way that you can tell something of what they’re saying is off but you can’t exactly prove them wrong either so 🤷🏽‍♀️💀

Mercurial placements (Gemini/Virgo) and Venus in the 3rd house may really love wearing rings or lots of bracelets, big watches, etc. Accessories that bring attention to the hands essentially

Libra placentas may or may not want to be "liked" but Libra Moon is a placement I've seen is genuinely liked by everyone. They have this calming and loving energy to them. Celebrities with this placement are generally unproblematic (Anne Hathaway, Emma Stone) or if they are problematic they can easily recover from backlash (Ariana Grande, Leo DiCaprio)

#astrology #astro #astro observations #astro notes #zodiac #birth chart #astrobydalia #astrology observations #astro community

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stormgardenscurse · 9 months ago

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‘do you remember? back when…’

Summary: a childhood friends AU! Well, Lilia’s is more like ‘back in our youth’ rather than childhood, but you get the gist.

Characters: Lilia, Malleus, Riddle, Jamil, Vil

Content warning: the Reader is gender neutral, but it’s mentioned they’ve worn dresses in Malleus’ part.

If you liked this, consider checking out my TWST Isekai Fanbook, now digitally available on my kofi!

Lilia Vanrouge

Back when you were both training to be knights, you mistook Lilia for a girl at first.

In your defense, it’s simply because of how pretty he is, yet so cutthroat and lithe on his feet that you swear this is what they mean by ‘angels of death’ descending on a battlefield.

Lilia calls you weird for comparing him to that when he much prefers to think of himself as some type of demon, or harbinger of doom.

“Do I still not look intimidating enough for you?” He’d asked, sharp teeth flashing with the question as the both of you leaned against the railings on the castle rooftop. Lilia angles his head back to gaze at you, and you think to yourself how it exposes the pale skin of his neck, which he’d never show to any opponent in a fight.

Two of your fingers reach to tap on that expanse of skin, causing Lilia to freeze from the contact. He tilts his head, comfortable enough that he hasn’t decided to shove you away yet.

“It’s just… you seem more mortal to me.” You shrug. “As mortal as a fae can be, anyways. I can reach out and touch you, and I would walk away unharmed.”

“That’s because I allow you to.” Lilia rolls his eyes. He finally steps away, picking up his weapon — heavy and gleaming emerald. From beneath his lashes, he gives you a challenging smile as he flips and catches it in his hand. “Care to spar before we turn in for the night?”

“Maybe you’re a vampire after all.” You pretend to be tired of his late requests, but follow Lilia down to the training grounds regardless. “The kind that human kingdoms are romanticizing in their newest novels. Sparkly under the sunlight.”

“If you’d like to sleep already, I’d be more than happy to croon you a lullaby.”

“You’ll only do so after I’m defeated on the ground, I’m sure.” With a pause, you give Lilia a proposal. “If I win, I’ll sing to you instead. But I’m not carrying you back to your dorm.”

“Oh? It’s a deal, then.”

Ever since, you can’t be sure if Lilia likes to throw your sparring matches just for the chance to hear you sing. You don’t often do so (you’re knights, after all), so he regards it as a secret side of you that only he gets to witness. You only come to this contemplation after feelings spark between you — face flushed as you wonder what to do next when you’ve fallen for someone so impossible.

He’s already been keeping you up at night with his nocturnal tendencies and hangouts… and now this?!

Malleus Draconia

It helps that as children, you never truly processed who Malleus was until a little later in your friendship. You were told he’s the son of the royal advisor, and so you prattled to him with questions of what the crown prince is like. He’d answer vaguely, sometimes saying that His Royal Highness has bad habits, and you’d nod along, hanging onto his every word.

Malleus soon realizes that you don’t care as much for ‘the prince’ as much as you did for him as your mysterious friend. You were both lonely noble-children, and you enjoyed sharing treats, flowers, and any new thing you could with Malleus. Once, he even tried on the trendiest dresses with you out of curiosity, and you lamented the fact that he could’ve made a beautiful girl.

No one would dare say that to him in any lifetime, other than you. Though to be fair, you didn’t know he was the prince yet.

“Flowers look wonderful in your hair! Since it’s dark, they stand out.” You continue weaving yellow and blue blooms into Malleus’ locks. “...Hey, what do you think life would be like if we were regular children?”

“Not nobles, you mean?” He hums, helping you decorate your hair once you’re done with his. He casts an easy spell to dye your hair with highlights to match the dress. “I suppose we’d be towns-children frolicking without a care in the world.”

“We’d still be friends, right…?”

Malleus pauses at the anxious edge in your voice. Perhaps you were just as reliant on this comforting friendship as he was. He tells himself to hide his status for a little while longer. “Of course. Our parents would still be acquainted, and we’d still have playdates — only running through the roads rather than castle halls.”

It’s hard to find a real friend amongst noble children. Some cling to their families, others are picky or judgmental, and…

A lot are only friends for as long as the other is useful.

“We should have an outing in the city one day.” You smile, trying to fight away the heavy air. “I’m sure you’d like the marketplace. I’ve only seen it from inside a carriage, but it looks fun.”

Soon, the outing is arranged. However…

“Before we go, there’s something I need to tell you.” Malleus takes your hands in his, squeezing them as if to ground himself in the moment. Time passes quickly for the fae, but his heart is beating out of his chest at what your reaction might be.

…He ends up delaying this reveal until the end of your excursion. But the last thing he expects is for your eyes to well up with tears and for you to latch onto him in a hug.

“I’m… I’m so sorry—! If only I was more reliable, you wouldn’t have to keep this a secret, and…”

As you let out a hiccup and continue apologizing, Malleus’ confusion melts into a soft smile, hugging you back.

Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle’s mother didn’t know about your existence for a while, as you’d always sneak over to his window after she left the house. You claimed you knew how accomplished his family is, so you told Riddle you’d prepare for a better impression in the future! “That way, we can hang out normally or study together!”

Truth be told, the only studying you’re interested in is with practical magic — as another child with an affinity with magic, you’ve been going to the library often to read up on theories, experimenting with what spells you can do.

As worried as Riddle is for your safety (you’ve been doing all this without supervision), he’s also very curious about watching magic unfold from your own hands. You showed him a color changing spell once, surprising him by appearing with a different appearance — it was cute how he panicked, thinking you went ahead and dyed your entire head pink.

“And nothing hurts? No side effects?” He asked.

“Nope! And one day, we can both attend a magic school and do spells like these all the time!”

One day… Despite how he’s temporarily stuck at home still, adhering to his mother’s strict rules, he clings onto the hope that it’ll fruition in him becoming a great mage. Then, when that happens, he can be the one to wow you with magic you haven’t seen before. Just as you have all these months, visiting with the intention of cheering him up or encouraging him.

On rare days, you manage to sneak Riddle out of the window for a quick visit to the park or library. There, with his heart thumping out of his chest, he’d marvel at the world you’re so familiar with already, and so willing to place into his unsteady palms.

“Can you read that?” You ask, pointing at a passage in a history book. While technically rebelling, you still chose a book on the same topic Riddle was meant to study at home.

“Yes, it’s…” As Riddle translates the scripture, he realizes you’re listening very intently. And all of a sudden, the closeness of your seats in the corner of the library makes him flush, realizing how you’ve always spoken to him kindly. Different from the playful tones you used at the start of your friendship, or currently do with the acquaintances he’s seen you greet along the way.

It’s been a while since he’s felt special, especially as the sentiment expired after years of his mother claiming he had a gift; that because he had the potential to be perfect, it'd come at a price of overwhelming pressure.

So why does your kind of ‘special’ feel like a balm?

Jamil Viper

Between his busy schedule working for the Al-Asims, it’s all Jamil can do to relax in the solitude of his own room… that is, until you’re temporarily displaced from your own, and have been allocated to bunk with Jamil since he’s ‘very capable’ and close to your age. Another bed is moved in. There’s still space, but Jamil dislikes having his privacy encroached upon.

The two of you never interacted before this, but he’s seen you around the mansion before doing chores and learning from the head servants. You aren’t too chatty, Jamil thinks, until you finally break it to him after the night of a banquet (the both of you too tired to keep up appearances, slumped on your respective beds), that he frowns a lot. And that’s why you haven’t spoken to him much until now.

Jamil blinks once, then twice. “I do?” He’s always been good at controlling his facial expressions—

“Yeah, when you think people aren’t looking.” You raise a finger in the air. “Especially when the meals aren’t to your liking, you tend to look around with judgmental eyes.”

“So you watch me when we’re at work.”

“Only because you never looked like you wanted to talk.” It’s not accusatory, merely an observation from you. With a sigh, Jamil falls on his back against the mattress. “Did you see the performers at the banquet?”

“The dancers were great. I saw them practicing in the morning before the event.” Jamil answers. It’s the first time you’re having a proper conversation, and while he’s not as chatty as Kalim (who he’s normally assigned to watch), you feel at ease.

“I remember them! The kitchen was handing out meals to the staff, and I was one of the delivery people.”

“Did you help cook too? There wasn’t enough salt in the curry.”

“You—! Then come and help us yourself!”

“Too much work.” Jamil pushes himself up on his elbows just to stick his tongue out at you, before turning to lay on his side. “We should rest. Tomorrow the guests are leaving, so the suites have to be cleaned.”

Even after you move back to your room, you spend time with Jamil, running off to the market after visiting family, and watching street performers and food vendors go about their day. On rare occasions, you knock on his window when you have a bad dream, and Jamil groggily holds up a conversation until you’ve calmed down. The stars are especially twinkly on those nights, as if they’re another witness to the friendship you shared beneath busy days and tall adults.

“Do you think we’d make good adults, Jamil?”

“Not many adults are good at it either. So we’ll be fine.”

“Well… That’s true. Goodnight, Jamil.”

“...Goodnight. Sleep tight.”

Vil Schoenheit

When you first met Vil as kids, you were intimidated by him not because he acted in evil roles, but because he had the aura of an adult.

“It’s weird… you look my age, but walk and talk like a grown-up.”

“Hm, I guess that’s not too bad of an impression. …What’s your name?”

You were next-door neighbors, and suffice to say your interests lied more in pop-culture as an audience rather than as an artist on-stage. It’s a world away from Vil who’s a child-actor and upcoming model, but when he’s not pursuing such work, he’s still just a boy.

…A boy who you were very surprised to see act his age, when he was with his father or smiled as he told you about the movies they starred in. You’d always listen, realizing that while Vil was always pretty, he’s even more eye-catching when he’s rambling about something he’s passionate about. It almost makes you want to grow up quickly too and pursue your own dreams.

No one would see this side of him outside the comfort of your homes, though. Vil has an image to uphold (at least, you’re quite sure he’s trying to craft a persona for the camera, considering how he asks you what you think an actor’s personality should be like), so you try and cover for him when strangers ask about Vil. Giving just enough praise without revealing too much, since they might be reporters:

“He’s really hard-working and nice to others! Vil even explains his work to me if I ask. You can tell he really loves acting.”

“Oh? You sound like you admire him a lot.”

“Well… lots of people do. Once you meet him, you’ll realize he’s like a diamond!”

Word of your comments gets to Vil, and he seems to be in a good mood, explaining to you that it sounds like something a fan would say. “...One day, I’ll have as many fans as my dad does.”

It becomes routine for Vil to knock on your door whenever he gets a new script. He likes having you watch him rehearse and give him your thoughts, amongst other things like discussing the story and causing the both of you to become invested in the plot.

You’re sworn to secrecy, of course, since you can’t leak the movie’s details. And after you’re a bit older, Vil instead makes it a game to read random lines to you, then asking you to make up the rest of the story (it’s a good improv session, even if your conversations devolve into ridiculous scenarios.)

You got each other parting gifts after you were accepted into different colleges; Vil’s to you is a ‘poisoned flower’, which is to say, an artificial flower scented to help you sleep. It’s so you can get proper rest instead of scrolling on your phone, Vil claims. And of course, you’re added into his personal Magicam to get life updates — even now, when asked who you were texting with a smile on your face, you keep Vil’s secret and claim it’s just a childhood friend:

“He’s in Night Raven College.”

“Oh, the same one Vil Schoenheit is in?”

“The very one! Pretty impressive, huh?”

#lilia vanrouge x reader #malleus draconia x reader #riddle rosehearts x reader #jamil viper x reader #vil schoenheit x reader #twst x reader #twst imagines #twst reader insert #twst x you #twisted wonderland #twst headcanons #storm writings

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ichatake · 7 months ago

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im curious since in ur request rules you have that you write yandere characters. What is your definition of yandere? How do you write them and what do you think about them? btw I really love your work.

and since we're on the topic, what characters would you see being a little yandere? What type of yandere would they be?

Hi Anon! I appreciate the question! Many people have different ideas of what a yandere is and how they should be portrayed. I’d like to start off by giving you the definition of what most people see a yandere:

Now, my definition of a yandere is a person who is completely devoted to another, to the point where they develop unhealthy tendencies. I tend to write my Yandere characters in a more realistic way. (I tend to stay away from the whole ‘oh gosh you just killed this person because they looked at me weird’ kind of writing style. It’s just not my cup of tea)

Since I’ve always been a big fan of psychological horror and dark romance, I portray yanderes as narcissistic, manipulative, and simply not safe to be around. They might have stalkerish tendencies, yes, but I like to focus more on how they would affect the person they like. (I know it kinda takes away from the whole definition of yandere) Basically, I just like turning the usual lovestruck, insane yandere into a more realistic version of themselves (as realistic as they could get in the ninja world. I hate completely altering a character’s personality into something they’re not).

What do I think of yanderes? Well, I certainly wouldn’t want to meet one in real life. I like reading and writing them in fiction, but in no way shape or form do I romanticize or agree with whatever the Yandere does. I do not condone any type abuse because it’s absolutely vile that someone might go out their way to hurt others. Having said that, I think many people might not find the way I write yanderes very pleasing, because it’s not what they’re used to seeing, and that’s totally okay!

Now to answer you final questions:

I believe there are a few characters that might have the possibilities of becoming a Yandere or having Yandere tendencies:

Obito (way too obsessive):

I know a lot of people think the same way as I do. I believe that Obito is a man with serious problems.

He technically grew up alone, just with his grandmother. He almost succeeded in putting everyone in an infinite genjutsu, where he could distort reality to his liking and be with the girl he loved.

It’s safe to say that he would be a yandere where if push comes to shove, he will do whatever it takes to have you near him.

He is obsessive (he had a lot of pictures of Rin when he was young, so…). He needs to remember your face clearly, even when he’s away from you. You’re the reason why he breathes. He lives because you allow him to. That’s what he thinks.

Madara(protective and controlling):

Hear me out, this man is complicated.

Sometimes he would put his desires over you, but if we’re going to be honest, he’d shred down the world for you.

If something ever happened to you, Madara would take no time in avenging you. He’s a little different to Obito. Although he’s obsessive, he doesn’t completely revolve his life around you.

He likes feeling possessive over you, but he can leave at any time that he needs to. You have to wait for him. He’ll be a protective yandere, looking out for you and making sure you understand that he’ll be the only one there for you.

Kakashi (protective, pathological liar) :

Whoa? Kakashi? Really? Yes really. This man has grown up alone. He made friends, they died. They left. Anytime he got close to someone, they’d disappear. It’s only logical that if he were to fall for someone, he’d like to protect them.

However, this protectiveness can get overwhelming. He knows you’re capable of protecting yourself, he simply doesn’t want you to. If one thing he’s done wrong in life, it’s protecting those around him. This was his time to make up for all those times he failed.

He isn’t used to affection, but when he has it, he craves it. Badly. You need to remind him that you love him too, or else he might just think you’re ready to leave him at any time.

He isn’t above lying to get you to do something. He’s lied before, so why not lie again? If it gets things going his way, he won’t care. A little harmless lie can turn into a bunch of them.

Sasuke (distant, but protective) :

If he likes you, he definitely won’t show it. If he genuinely cares, he won’t be above doing anything inhumane. He’s already done a lot of things in this world that got him hate, adding another one to his list wouldn’t be a problem.

He’ll work from the shadows. He’ll love you from far away. He isn’t really affectionate and doesn’t know how to show it.

One things certain though, you’re his lover. He will give his life for you or take another.

You ask him for the moon and he will serve it in a silver platter before leaving.

Do I think other character could be Yandere? Well yes, this is fiction after all, but these are the best that fit that description. Anyways, thank you for your questions! I’d love to answer more if anyone else is curious or wants to request some Yandere content!

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erisawrites · 4 months ago

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A Safety Net

Pairing: Yan!JayJo × F!reader

Content Warning: Yandere behaviour, mentions of stalking, physical abuse, female unsafety, mentions of forced marriage, maybe ooc Jay Jo?

Disclaimer: this should not be viewed as romanticization of stalking/yandere, it's merely a warped fantasy from the pov of a helpless character

Word Count: 4,645 words

Reblog if you want me to write more fics, and let me know what you want to read!

P.s can someone teach me Tumblr mobile formatting? 💀

M A S T E R L I S T

───※ ·❆· ※───

If there were two elements which would perfectly characterise the greatness which propelled Sara Kim's family into success would be gold and grandeur.

Grandeur for the glory her family of egoistic professionals and cut throat entrepreneurs parade around in. For the excessive flaunting of riches and endless achievements. Of grandiose luncheons, eclectic dresses and jewels in every colour of the rainbow that painted her monotonous life, like some montage of emotions.

But gold deserved its own special category, a very unique limelight to further underscore just how efficiently it encapsulated her materialistic life.

No, the woman wasn't referring to the golden spoon the daughter of elite entrepreneurs was born with.

But she was referring to the cage she was born into, a confinement which had even imprisoned her mind. Such boundaries of protection were what isolated her from the dangers of the world, as well as its sparse inhabitants and even sparser blessings, and especially from herself.

───※ ·❆· ※───

The sun had begun its ascent into the horizon, and so did her frantic housemaid's up the stairs leading to her room.

But Sarah had stirred awake long before, one of the few merits that walking around eggshells gifted her.

Or maybe a demerit, as the culprit for her sleep deprivation today no longer the fear of screaming mother, but rather the opposite: the unusual benevolence and kindness of her seemingly normal parents.

An odd kindness. Completely normal as per their perceptions, following their jovial announcement of her marriage being fixed last evening. Within an instant, the Dictator facade of her parents slowly thawed, perhaps from the relief of ‘accomplishing the responsibilities of the daughter’, of finally being able to brush her off their hands.

Choice was an illusion in her life, a concept Sara understood early on as she slipped bare feet into the one of the array of slippers aligned before her. But a mindful choice, a decision where the benefits were a majority, especially ones in her favour, was one piece of autonomy she bargained for from her authoritative mother. Perhaps it was the one sliver of mercy she granted in her unkind life, or maybe some form of training to get the woman primed to the decision making tasks required of a housewife. Had Mrs. Kim acted more of a mother, maybe Sarah would have considered the former possibility out of respect.

But maybe that autonomy she thought imagined to possess was also an illusion, just another one of their ‘spoiled’ daughter's whims that had to be entertained when their money couldn't fix it.

And here she was, with dishevelled hair, drooping dark circles, and a drowsiness threatening to plant her face-first onto the floor.

But as her eyes traced the sunrise through bleary eyes, her heartbeat quickened momentarily as another realisation setting upon her. Another thing which had greatly contributed to her early bird tendencies. Another person.

She first met him years ago in the renowned secondary school Sunny High, the national factory which churned out some of Korea's most obnoxious elites. A man who was nothing but everything at the same time. An introverted studious loner who kept to himself, while also being the school's academic whizz and a cycling prodigy. He hangs out with no one, but had everyone's envious gazes hanging upon his every move. He made no advance towards any girl, yet every girl's lovesickness only advanced with every disinterested scowl he shot their way. Likewise, he'd ignored all the boys and didn't care for their aimless attitudes, but the expansive mountain of accomplishments he overshadowed wasn't ignored by them. A separate league, an otherworldly being, an extraterrestrial intellectual and many more praises were flown in his way, none of which he was receptive to.

Except to her confused rambling.

“Hey, I'm really sorry to bother you, and I know I shouldn't bother studious kids…”,that particular day was still fresh in her memory, her awkward stance, her awkward uniform and that awkward chuckle. Of all days, it just had to be that particular and with him, of all people? “But I think you're sitting on my seat? For French?”

Aloofness had long shielded her from the taunts and jeers she'd receive in earlier schools, but the sudden pin drop silence unnerved her. Had she made a mistake? Did she offend him somehow? Broken some important hierarchical rule of the Sunny high student body?

Although whispers gladly answered her anxiety, they only worsened it further.

No way she's talking to him, who does she think she is?

She's asking that guy to move??? Does her dad own the school?

She screwed big time, man. Talking to a superior while looking like that.

These newbies are no respect but all attitude-

“Sure.”

His voice was deep and clear, but not as deep as the second silence that filled the room. Confusion had rooted her feet to the floor, panic slowly creeping in as she took in all the frightened and frustrated faces of her clas–

“Here!”,metal screeched violently against the floor, as a woman with a pixie cut sprang up, “You can sit with next to me-”

“She's fine here, Yuna.”,he snapped instantly, rather rudely despite the monotonous tone. Yuna gingerly pushed back the chair, concern flashing rapidly across her face. Alongside sympathy.

The boy shifted his belongings to the adjacent desk, which only now she noticed had been suddenly vacated. A deep shade of red coloured her cheeks as she looked down. Had she paid enough attention to her surroundings, she wouldn't have to take his seat unnecessarily. And she would have also noticed an even more concerned and sympathetic bandaid boy sitting now next to Yuna.

“I never caught your name.”,she croaked, cringing internally as the boy frowned in confusion.

“That's because I never gave it.”,he replied curtly, prompting an uneasy chuckle as she beat herself up mentally. She can cover herself in all the Cartier she wants, but never can she carry charisma.

“Well…uh..”,she covered up the awkwardness by clearing her throat, “I'm Sara Kim, by the way.”

The man kept silent as his calculating gaze was fixated upon her. She took this opportunity to stealthily scan his features, and truly, some people's luck was really just in all of the right places. There was no denying about it, from the chiselled jawline, swan like neck, slender nose and alluring, sapphire-toned eyes that seemed to brighten with each second.

“Jae-hyun.”

Sara blinked in surprise, mumbling, “What?”

The boy titled his head ever so slightly, perfectly aligning with the window just in time for the afternoon sun rays to directly bounce off his face, illuminating his reserved, yet resplendent features so strikingly that stole her breath.

“Jae-hyun Jo.”,he lowered his eyes, the faint streams of mahogany in his iris beaming in the sunlight. “But you can just call me Jay.”

Jay. No matter what Cartier she always carried, his charisma was even more priceless. A price indeed she'd one day have to pay for.

───※ ·❆· ※───

“My, Jae-hyun dear, you never fail to impress us.”

Never did Sara believe she'd witness the day where a sliver of emotion would crack through Jay's heartless mask. Well, she also believed her parents wouldnt foolishly fix her marriage, but here they are. Forget the fact that this man was sitting in his house, an impromptu visit four years after their graduation, or that it was his first meeting with his family outside school.

Her mother's perfectionism knew no bounds, even going so far as to scrutinize all her friendships, crafting every playdate carefully to her standards, and only permitting any interaction within the safe confines of her ‘home’. This means it's her first interaction with a Sunny High friend outside school hours too.

Well, at least officially.

Because Sarah Kim knew very well it wasn't the first time they two crossed paths outside.

Or at least have crossed paths where she wasn't aware of his looming presence.

All those three years at the wretched junkyard of elites, she had naively assumed she was taken under his wing. She revelled in being under the guidance of the valedictorian, who ensured she received stellar scores and minimum bullying throughout her tumultuous high school years.

He fixed every deficit in studies with their prolonged study sessions, but left her deficit in social awareness unfixed, which if patched up would open her eyes to the alarmed gazes of the students, the growing concern of his cycling teammates and sparse friends, especially the several interventions by some rabid redhead; the only one who ever stood up for her. The only one who ever understood what was in store for her.

But just like the gullible girl her mother raised her to be, she tossed those worries off her mind, and instead tossed her hair as she profusely thanked him at their graduation. Sarah expressed her gratitude heartily, perhaps even going overboard given it's her only friend since forever, only male friend since forever.

She regretted not having stressed on the ‘friends’ part harder, even holding back from saying so as to relish in the heated, innocent blush of his face. That one moment of illusionary love would cost her lifetime, as did all her gullible decisions.

No matter how overbearing or protective Jay was, Sara always chalked it up to the man's way of expressing his concern. After all, it was no different from her Father's, who also didn't let her take one step outside without his approval, and as bad as he was, Jay's not him, but simply a ‘concerned friend who's keeping her safe’, right?

It was right in high school, despite his stubborn insistence on walking her everywhere. Even feeling nice a few months post graduation. Then alright when she'd coincidently run into him on the street. Then okay when she'd spot him lurking from afar at times. Then when she swore some shadows were shaped strangely at night. Some camping awkwardly outside her window, some trailing right behind her footsteps during nightfall. Then when she saw visions of him everything she stepped out, when her phone drained too rapidly, filled its storage too quickly. When her web cameras began blinking too randomly. And when she began receiving parcels too strangely.

Through broken windows.

Just like his madness was a gradual process, so was her own descent into her own. Where she once was a simple girl who worried only about the clouds above her head, she had now descended into a paranoid insomniac who couldn't even trust her own shadow.

Like some protective older brother he paraded himself as, Jay would always reprimand her tersely whenever she got too close to some boy. Now, the instant she looks in a man's direction outside, her phone is instantly bombarded with spam messages and missed phone calls. Where before she'd snapshot pictures with every possible friend she could find, much to Jay's disdain, he now filled her gallery with snapshots of her own home the instant she breathed around any guy. Even if it was platonically. Even if it was professionally.

So the woman perfectly understood his intentions as he sat in his white coat next to her father, revelling in his first reunion with her like he hasn't been keeping his tabs on her since who knows for how long. Even when she closes her eyes she can still see his daunting silhouette. Even when she passed by her neighbour's and friends' houses, their terror-stricken faces, heavy with meaning, also reminded of him.

Her one shot at freedom, her long standing position as a creative director in a renowned firm, had slapped her in the face when she was to collaborate at the same hospital he worked at. Now he truly had her under his thumb, yet still graciously hides himself from her, like some cryptic grim reaper, always looming over her like some grotesque storm cloud, forever sealing her in a state of being watched.

It's the combined stress of having strict parents and a persistent stalker that deprived the woman of her only place of solace: sleep. But perhaps Jay's genius abilities surpassed it's limits as he formalized even in her dreams, switching them to nightmares that plagued her senses with shudders from their flashbacks.To walk on eggshells and tiptoe past bear traps. Sarah didn't realize when she switched from being an artist to an antelope.

Yet, all hope was not lost for the woman, she repeated to herself as she trudged into the washroom. Her mother still let her make some decisions, and as vindictive she could be, she kept her daughter's best interests in mine.

Her future husband would be great. Her future husband would be merciful. He would be strong and protective. Altruistic and considerate. That's why her mother settled upon him, didn't she? Her decisions were for her betterment, right?

Right.

She had nurtured her ambitions this far, built an impactful career in such limited time, acquired something no other woman in her lineage did; achieved some semblance of independence, even if it also was only accessible via her parents. There was a reason her company, her hard work, was eligible to be collaborated with Jay's hospital in the first place. Her job, and her future husband would be her new reset button. Then she can walk away from this life with her head held high, wipe away her tears with no regrets to carry with. Smile with no sorrow.

───※ ·❆· ※───

But in the silence of the bridal dressing room, Sarah carried nothing but regrets and sorrows with her.

Oh how gullible she was, how foolish, how naive, how starry-eyed and optimistic she behaved. Like her parents ever looked out for anyone but themselves, transforming any disposable being into their pawns for success, nor sparing their offspring as well. Keeping her child's emotional well-being in mind? She wanted to howl at her stupidity. Ensure she would tie the knot with some gentle man? As if! ‘Gentle’ is one thing, but geriatric is another. She should have seen it coming, oh how, just how could she miss it? Of course her parents wanted to climb up the social hierarchy , of course they'd discard her concerns and anxieties, tossing her into the arms of some aged millionaire. Of course they'd further entrench her in the very traditionalism she so desperately tried to escape.

And her meagre fantasy of her strong career? Laughable, utterly laughable considering it only bettered her marriage prospects as she was slaving away at her very fiancé's company. No wonder she garnered so much attention in so little time, her parents probably sat her up on some stage to be auctioned off too. That's of course why salary boosts and promotions came with such ease.

Though the August heat of Jeju Island was melting its inhabitants, Sarah felt an unshakable shiver rattling her heart, trembling her limbs and rolling bullets of sweat down her back.

Her engagement party just winded up a few hours ago, with her horde of tight-lipped cousins and family friends cheerily bidding her goodnight, like she was ignorant to their snide remarks. None of them understood what fate had in store for her. No one could understand what plight she was trapped in. The terrible fate of marrying into that geezer Song's family, where every woman lived, dresses, and birthed as per the conservative traditions. She wondered if their high collar and penchant for feminine attires was part of their modesty or to conceal certain secrets. Certain marks. Certain wounds.

Her nutritionist and ob-gyn ensured she was fed and fattened up like a cattle as part of wedding preparations. Yet, the bizarre conditions of her wedding, and of the ancient traditions that stripped a woman away from her identity, was a stress that kept her immobilized with panic and abhorrence, emptying her bowels night after night from the unyielding pressure as the Song's bride.

The duties, the expectations, the traditions, the culture, the environment, the family line, the children, everything, everything she struggled so hard to run away from came crashing down upon her. She sucked back tears all her life, enduring the beatings and beratings in hopes of escaping into a newer and better life, armed with her job and education a freedom

Oh what a lie, oh what a sham it all was! Those very two things she thought to be her weapons of rebellion had only solidified the Kim family's relations with the Songs, condemning her to a mediocre homemaker life for a decrepit man who sputtered enough life for lust.

Sarah sank to her knees, the bare skin blistering upon contacting icy ceramic. Manicured fingers dug into freshly curled hair, ruining the hairdresser’s hours of hard work as her frustration bunched them up in her hands, pulling apart her scalp from the madness and hysteria.

Though it was sweltering even in the night, her bare legs were shivering as they paced anxiously around her room, ignorant to the scandalous slip dress she was to wear. Some meaningless bet she lost, where her heartless bridal party plotted to make her the butt of their jokes. She felt her vision sway once more, a hammer pounding her head as a third migraine attacked her in the night.

She felt dread pool her stomach, bubbling dangerously, threatening to hurl her innards even if no food was left to puke out. The panic intensified so tremendously alongside her migraine, that she didn't notice she'd succumbed to her knees, limbs paralyzed as the room spun around in circles.

Memories flitted around the rotating room alongside reminders. Morning Make up session. Bridal outfitting fitting. Last minute venue inspection. First meeting prior engagement. Bridal party pictures. College graduation. Bridal photo shoot. Sunny High graduation. Catering confirmation. National exam preparation. Walking down the aisle. Walking home from school. Standing next to the groom. Standing next to the finish line. Staring into the void. Staring into the shadows-

Her eyes widened with disbelief, the room stilling back to its original position. Shadows. Exhaustion prompted her panicky mind to first whip her head around in search of shadows, nothing less from the gullible girl she always was.

As if on autopilot, the woman slipped on her flats, not caring for their impracticality or of her dress. She draped a single shawl around her sickly figure, shielding her face as she strode outside the hotel suite, racing down the flights of steps, and slipping out from the employees-only exit, as if she were the shadows of a passerby.

───※ ·❆· ※───

Her heels throbbed with pain, knees reddened and jittery from the humid winds and walking. It was sweltering no doubt, but a flimsy dress does a good job in allowing every draft of wind to circulate her noodle limbs.

Still, she dragged her feet on, scraping the cheap rubber flats against the ground, refusing to give up so readily, to fail before she even began.

In the flurry of panic, she carried nothing of use to her, leaving her stranded and disconnected in some desolate shady part of the island. Desperation had long blinded her from the lustful gazes of suspicious street men, ensuring she quickened her steps whenever a man looked at her for too long. But it was her only shot at searching. Only shot at survival.

In the corner of her eye, a suspicious figure shuffled, but disappeared into the darkness the instant she focused upon it.

Shadows. Like a moth to light, the woman sprang on her heels, dashing across the street and sinking into the twisted, dark alleys. This was certainly no place for a hopeless vulnerable woman, but no corner in this world offered her sanctuary from her nightmare, save for the one in this alley.

“Hello?”,she croaked, voice warped with trepidation. Was this a bad idea?. Another breeze sifted through her dress and her knees quivered, “Are you there?”

The ancient whirr of the overhead air conditioners and the flickering buzz of the street lamps comfortably filled the silence following her voice. It was hard to keenly sift through all noises while being stuck in a cramped residential area, where the monotonous whir of fans acted as a constant backdrop. It was a smart move for covering felonious antics, but it did little to quiten the growing footsteps approaching her.

Her heartbeat quickened, and a dull thud began ringing in her ears. No, she can not spiral into her emotions right now, “Hey….it's you, isn't it?”

The man stepped into a dimly lit patch in front of the dumpster, his tall stature seeming broader and more daunting since he last visited her house.

“Yo-you-”,the fear paralyzed her throat, constricting her airways, but she persisted, “You're him, aren't you? That guy, who's always following me around.”

She cringed at how pathetic she looked, dressed too lightly for the cold, chased down some stranger in a shady street, and tried to make polite talk with a brooding masked man whose eyes swirled with secrets. Dangerous secrets.

The man stepped closer, and it required everything in her willpower to not flee instantly, until a gloved hand left his pocket. “I came to make a bargain!”

He paused, eyebrows narrowing suspiciously, perhaps confused by whatever a powerless girl can possess to make a bargain. A girl with little possessions she was indeed, but there is nothing more she valued than her greatest, strongest, and most indispensable possession: herself.

“You want to take me, right?”,she shuddered, trying to hold back her tears, threatening to break her voice, “I-I'll come with you, okay?”

This seemed to confuse the man further, and she didn't realize he had removed another gloved hand from his pockets. Whether this was a good sign or a terrible one, she had to steer it towards the former.

“I have no objections against your wishes.”,she breathed, her heart pounding so violently to the point she heard it in her ears, “I'll do whatever you want, and go wherever you take me too, promise!”

Everything rested upon this one moment. Either she buys her ticket to freedom, or a one way condemnation to hell. A different type of hell.

The man stepped closer, before the street light fully illuminated his face, as he undid his mask and tugged off his beanie. Her heart plummeted as he attempted to gauge the emotional expression he continuously wore, fearing for the worst until he raised his arms, and she raised her hopes, and ran to close the distance in between them.

“Oh, Jay!”,she sighed, deeply inhaling his minty scent, a small aspect she realized she took for granted. The woman wrapped bony arms over his broad shoulders, barely able to lock hands while his own arms consumed her body with ease.

Though she wouldn't deny he was a dangerous, deranged control freak, she also can't deny how warm and comforting his embrace was. How protective and soothing her sinewy arms were, how his hands felt soft and gentle as they stroked her small back reassuringly. His touch was inviting, uplifting, and so tender, that this momentary physical content was enough to dissipate all of her anxieties. Has she been deprived of a support system so terribly? Of physical touch that terribly?

“Please take me with you.”,she pleaded, pulling back to gaze deeply into those pair of eyes that forever kept her under his watchful gaze, “I'll do anything, but please take me away from my family.”

She doubted she needed to explain her circumstances, given his constant surveillance must have uncovered more answers than she herself was aware of. Perhaps that was another benefit of choosing him over that geezer, he already discovered and understood all of her worries and problems.

Large hands cupped her cheeks, heat emanating through the soft gloves as his thumbs caressed damp skin, “Don't worry.”,as always, his voice deep, endless, fluid and reassuring, “I'm here for you now.”

Just hearing that one sentence was enough to uplift the burden weighing down her shoulders. She felt her knees buckle, being caught just in time by Jay, as the gates to her heart flooded open, pouring out all of her bottled up emotions she'd harboured since childhood.

Sara wept silent tears on his shoulder, consoled by the gentleness of his hands that swept down her tousled hair. All her life, she was to be constructed for others, built for others, at the command of others. No facet of her life was spared as her parents, her family and her friends took advantage of her position to climb up the ranks of social hierarchy. Anything conducted in relation to her was solely for the benefit of others, or for some non-existent ‘greater good’.

Yet Jaehyun Jo, valedictorian of Sunny High, prodigy cyclist of HummingBird, the only friend who did not abandon her side, even when she did, his main desire from her was just….her. He asked for nothing at all, indifferent to all power and grandeur attached to her name and simply sought for her most priceless jewel within her possessions; her heart and her affections.

While others snatched her to deconstruct and rebuild the woman at their whims, forcing her to sport numerous facades to accomplish who knows what sorts of business ventures and social feuds, he simply wished to snatch her away from the watchful eyes of world, but to also leave her intact as she is, untroubled, undisturbed and at ease.

He knew how susceptible she was to anxiety and panic attacks, how socially awkward she could be in public, and how little elegance she possessed thanks to her nerve-wracking paranoia. He also knew how terribly weak she fared in studies, in fine arts, in tennis, and all sorts of extracurriculars shoved down her throat for boosting her image. And especially her image, he was well aware of how her shyness terribly sabotaged it one instance after another.

And yet it didn't change his perception of her, didn't prevent him from pressing a soft, tender kiss on her forehead, replacing his lips with his own forehead afterwards, “I'll keep you safe and sound, love.”,he wrapped his arms tighter around her waist, reassuring in that same, melodious, reaffirming tone, “I promise.”

This was the truth she had been searching for all her life, the breakaway from the hellscape she once believed to be externally enchained too. The golden cage she forever resided in, illuminated not by the rarity of the metal, but by the searing hotness of the bars barring her from an escape.

When in reality, the true escape, the true sanctuary was in his love. A pure, untainted love that accepted even her lowest state and anguish, which suddenly reformed all those stalker incidents from one of infatuation to fondness.

The man side-stepped the woman, her hands automatically slipping around his bicep. It never ceased to amaze her how he only grew stronger with every interaction. Or maybe the stress just made her smaller, and every surrounding threat larger.

The woman pulled herself close to his warmth as they approached a limousine, for once not caring from where something sprang into existence. She didn't have to worry about that. She didn't have to worry about anything at all now.

Jay slipped into the leather chairs, pulling her hand alongside him as she comfortably snuggled into his side. The dim ambience coupled with the smooth jazz lulled her to sleep, a gift that at last came with ease from all her unease dissipating.

The golden cage from where she would forlornly admire the world no longer exists. Even though she was simply placed in another entrapment, the woman wouldn't mind it so long as her captor was one who would let her flourish, and one where she was cherished.

#windbreaker #windbreaker manhwa #windbreaker (yongseok jo)#windbreaker webtoon #jay jo x reader #jay jo #yandere jay jo #fanfiction #fanfic

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gloomyteddybear · 3 months ago

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dark fantasy concept

introduction

tw/cw: blood, body horror, mild suggestive, fucked up morals and content that comes with the dark fantasy genre, dehumanization(?);

isekai modern-reader into 'ye olde darke-medieval-fantasy' but instead of into the body of a human to re-create the industrial revolution. put them into the body of a very cryptid/monstrous version of a vamp

at first mc starts like rlly feral, jumbly-instinct thoughts. but as they begin to drink more blood they get more grounded. so basically hunger = madness or smth.

there's also gamer/leveling up/system adjacent things. but only for mc. where it basically counts how much kills they have and it rewards them with skills and its also kinda like a countdown to how many liters of blood they have left until they go bonkers.

since it's the medieval times, technology ain't that good, or most of anything for that matter. it's bad.

since mc is a spoiled city mouse, they rlly want to have modern commodities that only rich people at this time gets. like frequent baths, good infrastructure and basic plumbing. fancy shit like that.

they kinda get obsessed w/ it since its literally the only thing that's familiar and comforting to them so they try rlly hard to get it. either by killing rich people and stealing their houses or building their own spooky mansion by becoming a noble or smth.

it's kinda like those tropes of rich pretty vampire that gets absolutely monstrous w/o blood. with the bright eyes and growling with sharp teeth.

mc really hates when they get feral cause it makes them feel like a mindless monster, not unlike those that gets killed by hunters and mercenaries. so they cope by being as 'civil/cultured/refined' as possible.

absolutely disgusted at the idea of drinking blood, so they keep gaslighting themself into thinking it's wine. prolly has tarps or smth on their table and fancy glasses.

they often come off as arrogant or stand-offish in the 'don't touch me with ur dirty hands peasant' way, but in reality they're just... a paranoid myso/germaphobe.

they're really fancy, imagine ye stereotypical vamp aesthetic but in sleeping robes. just, like, a really comfortable vampire.

and they have really terrifying non-romanticized features as a nod to the feral-cryptid side they rlly want to hide. like the trope of vampire having tapedum lucidum or unique teeth marks (y's in leeches or patterns)---

---not those sharp and needle-like teeth for puncture that will leave delicate dot-scarring, perfect for symbiosis, self-control and donations. but textured teeth that's obvious that there's no way to stop the bleeding even if you wanted to, meant for gouging and death. kinda like bullet shrapnel or twisted daggers.

but it won't be complete w/out character interactions.

❤︎ mercenary / monster hunter (placeholder: montague )

>kinda like the witcher or mando at first glance. stoic, gruff guy, very tanky but somehow is very stealthy. has a dog trained to smell blood-trails and harmed prey, it is very rotund 'cause of treats. it's name is whinny (a pun, win, whiny, wine(both the drink and the olde english for friend)) like it's owner, the dog find you sus but later becomes attached to you.

>tendencies probably started out in pity, 'damn is this a baby vamp? hopeless. guess i gotta feed them so they get strong enough to be a honorable adversary'. love a guy with a code of honor but dubious morality. but then he got too into it? he finds the fact that a 'monster' has more of a moral compass than him interesting (ur human kill count being lower, disliking torture, etc) lowkey wants to fix you but in a making you better at murder way.

>has a protective dynamic w/ reader but only later on (monty basically wanted them dead lol), brings them lots of prey to feed on (mostly of the bipedal variety, wink wink nudge nudge), if ya refuse to feed there's definitely going to be some tough-love to encourage a healthy diet.

>can be either romantic or familial dynamic. but there's definitively a touch of fear/intimidation on either party.

❤︎ honored guest / your good friend (placeholder: aldwin )

>is either a himbo or really 'cowardly'. the first guy you ever met that you didn't outright attempt-to or kill. kinda milk-toast at first glance. but the only guy you know can't and won't kill you. you often contemplate turning him into a thrall to keep you company for as long as you 'live', (he isn't that opposed to the idea) but often back out because you still have modern sensibilities, mind control bad.

>you often baby him, both in fear of making him scared of you (the smell is fearousel not actual fear) and also because technically he is one compared to you. that's a grown man, he's not actually scared of your mansion he just wants to be near you 24/7.

>sometimes you use him as a juice box, but only after hosting extravagant dinner parties whenever he visits (which is often, on both), making sure he eats enough to replace the blood and too drunk to feel pain. it was actually his idea, managed to convince himself that the dinner is for replenishing and not because you want to celebrate him. the actual feeding is awkward, you refuse to use your teeth and used one of the dinner knifes.

>friend zone/ one sided. mc is in denial/deeply oblivious. can be read as codependent (emotionally).

❤︎ the scholar / the monster doctor (placeholder: boris )

>doctor/physician guy. he has glasses :), someone who takes ur ideas seriously, sees you as a kindred soul, both in the studies and about your nature. has a whole jekyll and hyde situation, his jobs is kinda the reason why he goes awoo in the night. he's surprisingly very soft? mild mannered, polite, a proper gentleman. (whinny hates him lmao)

>kinda a goldigger, first approached you with the intent of having you sponsor his 'research' (monster biology) but later decided to have a collab w/ you. you still treat him as kinda of a sugarbaby still, reserving a special place in the manor to serve as his lab and giving him lots of artifacts and equipment. you mostly do it to see if he has a cure for vampirism (aside from a very painful death), but it's nice to see a very chivalrous man get flustered when it's him being spoilt.

>the wolf side is the complete opposite of his demeanor, feral, bloodthirsty and animalistic, it attacks and destroys everything in it's wake, it cannot harm you due to your strength, but the intent is obvious. it's a very harrowing affair filled with angst, (except the part where you're prepping for the full moon and needing to chain him with silver), you know what's its like to lose control and hurt someone innocent so you always try to do damage control for his sake.

>kinda puts you in a pedestal, sees you as someone out of his league.

❤︎ the oldest servant / elder-vampire butler (placeholder: aldair )

>kinda older looking in appearance but still pretty-boy enough(? somehow). you didn't turn him, he came with the mansion. he used to be a thrall to someone else but now he's a under your reign. has beef with everyone except monty (prolly teaming to make you less hopeless), specially hates aldwin. he's less alfred, more sebastian/claude or ron molan(TCF).

> it's not exactly known why he's loyal, considering he wanted to kill his previous sire and you don't treat him any better (by your standards, vampire culture is weird). maybe it was the way you just... 'subdued' it and allowed him the pleasure of killing his torturer? causing some weird begrudging-debt turned devotion, that or the fact that you are not a pureblood---or at least act like one.

> kinda thinks ur a spoiled wimp but still spoils you. way too knowledgeable abt your habits, you stretch out a hand and he's already putting a glass of 'wine' between your fingers. you shift in your seat? he's already getting you a footstool (mostly an unfaithful servant or a prisoner), you accidentally tear out someone's throat? he's already collecting their blood in bottles, cleaning the crime scene and creating your alibi.

> you're deff being primed for something. maybe related to the dozens of bottles (and sacrifices) in your cellar.

#character concept #vamp reader #oc concept #yandere #sub yandere #original characters #original character #suggestive #dark fantasy #body horror #dehumanisation tw #ʕ•ﻌ•ʔ <(posts!)

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darkestravine · 10 months ago

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“It wasn’t that bad really”

She muttered, lying on the floor

Twirling her finger through her hair

Blankly gazing at the “glow in the dark” stars on the ceiling

She had a tendency to complicate and romanticize things

Things that are simple and which should definitely not be romanticized

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quamaii · 6 months ago

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I am very normal, so I decided to assign all of the Our Wonderland main cast a Jack Off Jill song, as well as some duo songs. These are my personal interpretations of the songs and characters, however if I did get something blatantly wrong, please let me know. Admittedly I am not the most confident in some of these, but I think they work for the most part.

Spoilers as well as TW for self harm, suicide, abuse, and other dark topics under the cut!

Iggy — Strawberry Gashes:

Blaming yourself for the death of a friend due to suicide. Though that exact thing never happens with him (though getting quite close with Orlam), Iggy does often blame himself for the way his friends have turned out which is only exacerbated in Wonderland. The "her" in this song is meant to represent one person, but it honestly works with all of Iggy's friendships.

Turn her over

A candle is lit, I see through her

Blow it out and

Save all her ashes for me

Curse me, sold her

The poison that runs its course through her

Pale white skin with

Strawberry gashes all over, all over

Watch me lose her

It's almost like losing myself

Give her my soul

And let them take somebody else, get away from me

Watch me fault her

"You're living like a disaster"

She said, "kill me faster"

With strawberry gashes all over, all over me!

Genzou — Underjoyed:

Depression and all the self-deprecating thoughts and behaviors that come with it. Very representative of Genzou's mindset throughout a majority of the game. Also mentions alcohol as a coping mechanism.

An old friend convinced me that he was underjoyed

He never caused friction, his ego, he destroyed

He made a decision, he jumped into the void

Or maybe

Drown your fears in alcohol, everybody spills and falls

Choke on every dream you ever had

Drown yourself in alcohol, everybody slips and falls

Choke on every dream you ever had

Keep yourself in six degrees, no one ever comforts me

Why should they bother when I'm alone?

Orlam — When I Am Queen:

Someone with self-harming/suicidal tendencies fantasizing about when they will be crowned royalty and worshipped. They dream about being in control, getting revenge on everyone who wronged them, and seemingly try to romanticize their self harm.

When I am queen, I will insist

With perfect scars upon my wrists

That everything you once held dear

Is taken away from you

But until then, I'll have to

Drown, drown, drown myself!

Drown!

Gidget — Cinnamon Spider:

Feelings of guilt and inadequacy. I'm not entirely sure what the song is about, but there is a theme about breaking free from expectations and reclaiming what is yours. Also, spider motif.

Consumed by hate and guilt, she'll never retire

Too old to fix, too dead to ever acquire

Slit wrists, talk shit but she will never inspire

A plan to save herself, the cinnamon spider

I, I, I, I, I won't try, I, I!

And I every time I tell that lie, I live without guilt

And I, I, I, I, I won't cry, I, I!

And I hope you love your life and live with your guilt

Bucks — Horrible:

Hatred. Both for yourself and the world. Bucks seems to be a very nice and genuine person at heart, but people's expectations of her cause her to turn into a hateful and angry person, both consciously (her joking about how she's a monster and playing up how tough she is) and unintentionally (developing restrained anger at being forced into a lifestyle she didn't want).

Fade into yesterday, searching for my youth

Trying to digest it all, searching for the truth

Self centered devil spawn, this makes me durable

Or am I criminal? I'm fucking horrible

Horrible!

And everything's horrible

Horrible

Cecil — Vivica:

Looking into a friend's toxic relationship. Lyrics are very reassuring, talking about how you'll always be there for Vivica (who's Gidget in this case), and that she is very much beautiful and worthy of love and he (never given a name) is simply unaware. This song is mostly representative of Cecil's relationship with Gidget to me, however since they are so connected I feel like it's okay to put it as a solo song. The "he" represents a lot of different people to be homest, I feel like Iggy is the most obvious but it could also be Gidget's mom or generally anyone who's unaccepting of them.

He'll never change, he's just too vague

He'll never say you're beautiful

Oh, Vivica, I wish you well

I really do, I really do

The apple falls far from the tree

She's rotting and so beautiful

I'd like to keep her here with me

And tell her that she's beautiful

She takes the pills to fall asleep

And dream that she's invisible

Tormented dreams, she stays awake

Recalls when she was capable

Genzou/Iggy — Love Song:

Exactly what the title says. Has to be the most wholesome of JOJ's songs, hence I have assigned it to the healthiest relationship in the game.

Whenever I'm alone with you

You make me feel like I am home again

Whenever I'm alone with you

You make me feel like I am whole again

However far away

I will always love you

However long I stay

I will always love you

Whatever words I say

I will always love you

I will always love you!

Genzou/Orlam — Cockroach Waltz:

A toxic and codependent relationship. I already mentioned this song in relation to them, but it really does just fit them so well.

We hide in the cupboards

And under the stairs

We poison each other, but we know

That nobody cares

We look at each other

With a compound eye

See something that's nothing

And then start to cry

I am a part of you (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh)

You made me want (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh)

I am a part of you (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh)

I liked you once (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh)

Gidget/Iggy — Surgery:

Wanting to change yourself to try and mend a broken relationship. Themes of surgery and cutting, believing you are diseased and must be cured by the other person. Interesting in that the lyrics fit both Gidget and Iggy's POV: with Gidget trying to change their entire personality and identity to be more appealing to Iggy, and Iggy forcing himself to go along with Gidget's advances, believing it's something he has to do.

I can change, I can cut it open

Look at me the way you did before

I can change, diagnose the symptom

Buy the antidote but not the cure

Hold me under

Cut away this empty

Hold me under

Change the way I feel about you

#tw self harm #tw suicide #tw abuse #our wonderland #our wonderland spoilers #ow: iggy #iggy maxwell #ow: genzou #genzou ichihara #ow: orlam #orlam brewbacher #ow: gidget #gidget bordelle #ow: bucks #buxley krills #ow: cecil #cecil #jack off jill #quamais rambles

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just-think-happythoughts · 1 month ago

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Why Gothic Literature is secretly queer

Monsters, vampires, werewolves, and magical portraits are all part of what we today call Gothic literature. Gothic literature brings the most terrible things on paper and ensures the reader experiences a feeling of terror and fear when reading the writer’s work. But how are writers able to create these hair-raising stories and bring out people’s deepest fears?

The main reason why authors can create these kinds of chilling stories is because they assimilate their own experiences in their work. This means that when reading a literature piece you most likely also read a twisted or symbolic version of a situation or feeling the author experienced. In the case of Gothic literature, this can probably be understood as a fear of the author, due to the terrifying undertone of the literature subgenre characteristics.

In other words, Bram Stoker didn’t actually mean with his work to warn people about possible night-living bloodsucking creatures. He talked about his deepest societal fears, formalized in the context of a vampire.

But what kind of fears are we talking about?

During the 19th century, many fears could have been experienced by authors and therefore be the inspiration for their work. However, a clear motif within gothic literature is queerness and homosexual tendencies.

LGBTQ+ people have always been around, including the 19th century. Although the level of acceptance regarding queer people is far from perfect in our current times, the 19th century was a different time in historical background and queer recognition.

The difference between the 19th century and other historical periods is the fact that people, for the first time since the Ancient Greeks, spoke of homosexuality as a concept. During the 2nd Industrial Revolution, scientists analyzed homosexual tendencies and formed an opinion on queerness.

Heteronormativity and queerphobia have made it hard for LGBTQ+ people to accept their feelings. This resulted in fear and anxiety around concepts like marriage and social standards.

Dark Romanticism and Gothic Literature proved to be the ideal place for angsty people to pour their hearts out in the form of chilling creatures and horrific scenes. These elements are nothing more than an expression of their anxieties.

We cannot talk about queerness in Gothic literature without mentioning our queer icons: Dracula and Dorian Gray.

It is no secret that Bram Stoker’s Dracula is a sexually-tinted piece, with extensive use of sensuality and seducing elements. These elements are regarding female as well as male characters. The act of drinking blood was often associated with sexual acts in the Victorian era, so the fact that Count Dracula drank the blood of females as well as males, proved to be related to bisexuality.

Besides, it is clearly stated that the sexual tendencies were related to Dracula, the antagonist. How sexuality is portrayed as a sin in Dracula could be a reference to Bram Stoker’s experiences with homosexuality.

Oscar Wilde was one of the few openly gay men - as far as we can talk about being openly gay in the Victorian era - during his writing period. This resulted in the Oscar Wilde trial and eventually his death. However, his homosexuality and queer tendencies are well portrayed in his work.

In The Picture of Dorian Gray, Dorian seemed to be seduced by Lord Henry. Apart from that, Basil, the painter of his picture, seemed to be attracted to Dorian too. This triangular relationship was full of sensual and sexual elements and queer motifs, but in an antagonist kind of way just like in Dracula.

These examples are just a few in which queer motifs seemed to be linked with monsters and other antagonist-like creatures within Gothic literature.

This proves that LGBTQ+ people have often been searching for a way to express their suppressed feelings in a heteronormative environment. In some ways, it is not that different from our current times. Think of all the moments when you cannot hold hands with your partner or avoid expressing any other form of affection to guarantee your safety. It proves that we still have a long way to go to be able to love who we want to love.

#queer #gothic literature #romanticism #dracula #dorian gray #essay writing #writeblr #writing

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zorosleftshoe · 2 years ago

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Hi! Can I request a fanfic where the reader has a panic attack and Colby is by their side comforting them?

Yes. Disclaimer: I’m not romanticizing panic attacks or mental illness!

Pairing: Colby Brock x fem!Reader

Warnings: panic attack

It wasn’t very often that Colby invited me to tag along on their investigations. Being the protector he was, his main worry was that something bad would happen to me.

After the experience with Kris at Goatman’s bridge Colby’s mind was made up. I was no longer going with them. My safety was a luxury he just wasn’t willing to risk. However, this was an exception.

“Colby, it’s in her blood!” Sam wagered. “I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t think she was the key to getting a response we need.” Colby huffed.

“Do you hear yourself, man?” He rested a ring clad hand on my shoulder as he eyed the blonde haired boy. “You want to risk her safety to get a good video?”

“That’s not at all what I’m saying.” Sam’s eyes trailed to mine and I could see he was pleading with me. “This involves her, Colby. I’m just asking you to consider.” Colby shook his head and dropped his gaze to meet mine.

“I know you’re worried but Sam is right. If I’m there, the spirits might reach out more.” He sighed heavily and kneeled down in front of me to rest his hands on my knees.

“You know the history of this place, baby. Your ancestors tortured these people. If we take you in there, it’s like throwing you into the lion’s den.” I leaned forward to rest my forehead against his.

“I promise if something happens, we can leave. I’ll tell you the second I think I’m in danger.” He exhaled before rising to his feet.

“Okay.” The drive to McAllister Mansion was fairly quiet. Colby lost in his thoughts with his tendency to overthink, Sam still trying to mend things between the two after the encounter the day before, and I with my head rested against the glass watching the trees blur passed.

When we arrived Sam and Colby quickly got to work setting up their equipment as I wandered around the outside of the house. As my eyes glossed over each window I landed on a dark figure. My heart began to hammer in my chest as I looked up at this window. I watched as the figure moved a shaky limb and pointed at me. My breath became ragged as I continued to look up at the figure. Just as my knees were about to buckle I felt arms encasing me.

“Hey.” Colby’s voice filled my ears and I tried to ground myself but my eyes were still trained on the figure pointing at me with such hatred. “Baby, listen to my voice. Five things you can see.”

“Uh, tree. House. Car. Road. You.” I could feel his hands rubbing my arms gently but I still couldn’t shake the figure from my head as my eyes darted around trying to fulfill his request.

“Four things you can touch.” My breathing was still eractic as I palmed his jacket in my hands.

“Grass. Car. Door. Your jacket.” Colby’s nose nuzzled into my hair.

“Good job, sweetheart. Three things you can hear.”

“Birds. A train. Your voice.” My voice was still shaky but chest wasn’t heaving anymore.

“Two things you can smell.” His voice was soft as he leaned in close to my ear.

“The pines. Your cologne.” He pressed a kiss to the exposed skin on my jaw and nuzzled his nose further into my cheek.

“One thing you can taste.” By now my chest was rising and falling at a normal pace and I turned my head just enough to catch Colby’s gaze.

“Your lips.” A wide smile crossed his face and he pressed his lips gently against mine. “I’m sorry.” I whispered when we pulled away.

“Don’t apologize. What caused it?” I looked back to the window but now it was vacant.

“I thought I saw something.” Colby nodded and pulled me flush against his chest. “Thank you, Colbs.” I nuzzled my face further into his clothed chest as he rubbed small circles into my back.

#sam and colby #colby brock x you #colby brock x y/n #colby brock imagine #colby brock x reader

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jasminewalkerauthor · 8 months ago

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Trope chats: Dark academia

Dark Academia, a cultural aesthetic and literary genre, has surged in popularity in recent years, captivating audiences with its blend of intellectualism, mystery, and darkness. This essay delves into the evolution, appeal, defining features, and potential pitfalls of Dark Academia in literature and media, exploring its cultural significance and enduring allure.

Dark Academia finds its roots in gothic literature and classical themes, drawing inspiration from works such as Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein" and Edgar Allan Poe's macabre tales. However, its modern incarnation began to take shape in the early 20th century with novels like "The Secret History" by Donna Tartt and "Brideshead Revisited" by Evelyn Waugh. These works introduced themes of intellectualism, elitism, and moral ambiguity set within academic institutions.

Dark Academia's appeal lies in its romanticization of academia, coupled with elements of mystery, rebellion, and existential angst. Its depiction of ivy-covered campuses, candlelit libraries, and passionate debates evokes a sense of nostalgia and longing for a bygone era. Moreover, its exploration of complex characters grappling with ethical dilemmas and existential questions resonates with audiences seeking depth and introspection in their media consumption.

Defining Features of Dark Academia:

Academic Setting: Dark Academia often unfolds within prestigious educational institutions such as universities, boarding schools, or libraries, emphasizing the pursuit of knowledge and intellectual discovery.

Aesthetic Sensibility: Characterized by vintage fashion, classical architecture, and atmospheric landscapes, Dark Academia embraces a nostalgic and timeless aesthetic that harkens back to eras past.

Themes of Morality and Mortality: Dark Academia delves into moral ambiguity, existential angst, and the inevitability of death, exploring the darker aspects of human nature and the human condition.

Intellectualism and Obsession: Protagonists in Dark Academia are often portrayed as intellectuals or artists consumed by their pursuit of knowledge, creativity, or a particular obsession, leading to ethical dilemmas and personal crises.

Rituals and Traditions: The genre frequently incorporates rituals, traditions, and secret societies, adding an element of mystery and intrigue to the narrative.

While Dark Academia offers a compelling exploration of intellectualism and existential themes, it is not without its pitfalls. Critics argue that it romanticizes elitism, perpetuates harmful stereotypes, and glorifies toxic behavior such as substance abuse, self-destructive tendencies, and elitist attitudes. Moreover, its emphasis on aestheticism and nostalgia may overshadow deeper social and political issues, leading to a superficial engagement with complex themes.

In recent years, Dark Academia has experienced a resurgence in literature, film, television, and social media, fueled by platforms like Tumblr, Instagram, and TikTok. Contemporary works such as "If We Were Villains" by M.L. Rio and "Ninth House" by Leigh Bardugo have brought the genre to new audiences, blending elements of mystery, fantasy, and psychological suspense. Additionally, films like "Dead Poets Society" and "The Magicians" series have further popularized Dark Academia's themes and aesthetic sensibility, cementing its status as a cultural phenomenon.

Dark Academia stands as a multifaceted genre that explores the intersection of intellect, morality, and mortality within academic settings. Its evolution from gothic literature to a modern cultural aesthetic reflects a timeless fascination with the pursuit of knowledge and the darker aspects of human nature. While its appeal lies in its romanticization of academia and exploration of existential themes, Dark Academia also faces criticism for its potential to glorify elitism and toxic behavior. Nevertheless, its enduring allure continues to captivate audiences, ensuring its place in the literary and cultural landscape for generations to come.

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mermaidsirennikita · 2 months ago

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ARC REVIEW: The Beast Takes a Bride by Julie Anne Long

4.5/5. Releases 10/22/2024.

The Vibes:

—Beauty and the Beast (most obvi)

—weapon-grade pining

—big stern man meets lowkey bratty woman (his wife)

—covert boning (like... everyone is covertly boning in this book)

Heat Index: 7/10

The Basics:

Alexandra Brightwall should be relieved when her husband, war hero Magnus, bails her out of prison. The problem? They haven't seen each other for five years. Not since the day after their wedding, actually. Stern and cool, Magnus knows their marriage was a huge mistake, so he has a proposal. He's on the verge of being created an earl; he just needs to present a good face until that happens. As long as Alexandra helps him put on the facade of a harmonious relationship, he's happy to give her a life of luxury... far from him. Needless to say, this is a lot easier said than done.

The Review:

Julie Anne Long is always funny; but the best kind of Julie Anne Long also punches you in the gut. This? Does just that. In fact, I think it's my third-favorite JAL, after What I Did for a Duke and After Dark with the Duke. It kind of gave me everything!

The thing I've struggled with when reading a lot of recent historical romances is that everyone is very... nice. Sedate, even. They don't act out, they're fundamentally good people who don't fuck up, and so on. This is not that kind of book. It's not that Magnus or Alexandra are so horrible. They're clearly good people with good hearts and good intentions.

They're just also... delightfully flawed. She's a bit bratty and flighty and tends to act on impulse. He's stern and struggles with forgiveness, and has a tendency to want to win at all costs. Neither of them are by any means monsters (though Magnus is referred to as a "beast" by the gossips, and in one of my favorite microtropes, IT KINDA HURTS BIG GROWLY MAN'S FEELINGS WHEN PEOPLE CALL HIM BEAST). But they have their issues, and they haven't dealt with them, and that's why their marriage combusts before it can really even start.

Also, they're both pretty bad at talking about their feelings, and make judgments about each other that aren't really fair. Here's the thing, though: All of this makes sense, because they were kind of strangers marrying. You get the most glorious pining thoughts from Magnus, and it's clear that he was besotted with Alexandra from the start... But he really didn't get to know her as a person. He didn't let her be a flawed person.

And it's a surprisingly complex thing, the way Long both lets us luxuriate in the swoony romanticism of Magnus's initial feelings for Alexandra (and my God, is it romantic... this is just an achingly romantic novel, in general) while never condemning Alexandra for her resistance. Because Magnus's feelings can be genuine, and he can be right about this inexorable chemistry between him and Alexandra; and he can also push Alexandra too far too soon and go about making their relationship a reality in a bad way. And then act affronted when she doesn't respond well to being pushed.

They're both messy people who nevertheless have, as Magnus, one of those guys with a Good Sense About Things (hence him being good at war) amazing chemistry. The kind of tension that just has to be fulfilled. It's delicious, and it's part of what makes this one of the hottest books I've read by Long. I mean. Holy shit.

It's also just like... so sweet? I felt as if I really got to know both Magnus and Alexandra, despite the narrative being brisk and also, like every book in this series, offering time to supporting characters. Few people can pull this off. Long is one of the best romance writers I can think of in terms of noticing the small details that have a big impact. The little notes about Magnus's past that tell you so much about why he is the way he is. The beats for Alexandra that remind you of a depth he doesn't necessarily want to see in her, five years after she broke his heart.

(And: I LOVE what drove them apart initially. Handled with such humanity! A thing I think a lot of authors wouldn't have done!)

Also—for Jane Austen fans. Imagine Colonel Brandon local pushing the marriage with Marianne, and then having it blow up in his face. With public sex. This is the look!

Of course, I have to note those supporting characters. I always love catching up with the regulars. When will Dot and Mr. Pike figure it out? How loud is Dot going to be when they finally do it? A small subplot in the book is basically a lot of supporting characters being pushed into horniness because of the awkward situations that arise when a honeymooning couple rooms at the Palace. It is glorious. It leads to some super funny yet sexy moments between our two mainstay couples, Delilah and Tristan (Lady Derring Takes a Lover) and Angelique and Lucien (Angel in a Devil's Arms). The way these books keep giving me Lustful Married Couples is. Everything!

The Sex:

Again... this is one of the horniest JAL books I've read! You do genuinely get more sex on the page than a few of the previous installments in this series (four scenes between our main couple, including one particularly exciting moment), plus a lot of hardcore flirting/implied sex between two other couples... and then the "it's funny, but now everyone is talking about loud sex and it's getting hot in the room" loud newlyweds.

I really loved how Alexandra and Magnus had sex, though. The impetuousness of it all. The way he just SNAPPED around her. And honestly? When he's right, he's right. He knew they'd be great in bed together, and, like... yes. I also super appreciated how he used Alexandra's Lust for His Body against her. So great.

Basically: It's funny! It's emotionally devastating at points! It's sexy! This is what we want from Julie Anne Long, and it's a damn good marriage in trouble/second chance book. So excited for everyone else to read this one.

Thanks to NetGalley and Avon for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

#romance novel blogging #romance novels #arc reviews #netgalley #book recs #book reviews #books

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nox-icate · 3 months ago

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🐊 Welcome to the blog of your favorite swamp-dwelling reptile 🐊

. ‧˚₊꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶About me︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷₊˚‧ .

࿐ I go by quite a few names, which include: Evander, Donatello, Laurie, and Corrie! But I more commonly go by Nox on here! But feel free to call me whatever you deem suitable.

࿐ I use he/him, xey/xem, and they/them pronouns. Please only use enby or masculine terms when referring to me. Pronouns page <- ࿐ Please keep in mind that I have Autism, Dyslexia, Anxiety, ADHD, and that I am under the bipolar umbrella, keep patience with me in mind while interacting! ࿐ My birthday is 12/18/2007 making me a MINOR. ࿐ I am a teenager, meaning I have a tendency to make dark/inappropriate jokes, I can put on a filter if requested. ࿐ I do tend to be forgetful about some things (I genuinely have a horrible memory /srs) so please don't be afraid to point out on my slip ups/correct me if needed. ࿐ I am a very affectionate person with a tendency to cling onto people, and come off too friendly too fast. If I’ve ever crossed a boundary/made you uncomfortable please, PLEASE don’t be afraid to let me know. I don’t intend nor want to make anyone uncomfortable in any way shape or form and struggle with picking up cues/indicators that I’ve crossed a boundary (Plus being online the majority of my life and being homeschooled I tend to cling to people who I want to befriend and lack proper social skills).

. ‧˚₊꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶Links + Tags︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷₊˚‧ . LINKS: ࿐ Bluesky <- ࿐ Discord server <- ࿐ Toyhouse <- ࿐ Youtube <- ࿐ Instagram <- ࿐ Pronouns page <- TAGS:

#my art <- Pretty self explanatory. #my sona <- Posts including one of my many sonas. #my ocs <- My original characters. #🐊 shiggles <- Just me being a dumbass. #🐊 rambles <- My text/rant tag. #TMNT Solidarity <- My TMNT iteration. Masterlist (TBA) #ROTTMNT FQ <- My ROTTMNT AU (FQ standing for Four Quarters). Masterlist (TBA) #TMLP AU <- An AU where the boys get teleported to Equestria I made that me and my close friends are working on. Masterlist (TBA) MOOTS:

@mossy-box (The Leo to my Donnie, and one of my closest friends!) Tag: #Overgrown box 🐢 @k9alpine (The Raph to my Donnie, also one of my closest friends!) Tag: #K9Alpha 🐺 @that-was-pigeon (My parental figure!) Tag: #Twas pigeon 🥔 @drixxtavern (Fish wife! /p) Tag: Tba More moots TBA

. ‧˚₊꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶Interests︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷₊˚‧ . ࿐ As of currently I am fixated on quite a lot of differing medias, which includes, but is not limited to: Arcane, Blue eye samurai, Bluey, Ducktales (2017), HTTYD, I saw the TV glow, MLP, Saw, Scooby Doo, Spider man, Stranger things, Sweet tooth, The Alien franchise, The last of us, The quarry, Usagi Yojimbo, Venom, Wild kratts, and TMNT!

࿐ I'm absolutely obsessed with reptiles, dinosaurs, bugs, and aquatic life! My favorite animals being Alligators and Crocodiles.

࿐ I have also found I have a strange infatuation with radiation (chernobyl in general), natural disasters, geology, abandoned buildings, and vintage children's books/poetry. ❗ DNI AND BOUNDARIES BELOW, PLEASE READ BEFORE INTERACTING ❗

. ‧˚₊꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷︶DNI + Boundaries︶꒷꒦꒷︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦꒷₊˚‧ .

DNI LIST: ࿐ Do NOT interact if you are/you associate yourself with, or support anything below. ࿐ Anyone under the age of 13 (This is for my own comfort as I'm not comfortable interacting with extremely young users). ࿐ Romanticizations/Sexualizations of unhealthy/toxic relationships (This includes heavy yandere shit < This is for my own comfort). ࿐ Sexualizing transgender people/characters (This is for my own comfort). ࿐ Dsmp (This is for my own comfort). ࿐ T-cest/Incest. ࿐ Proshipping. ࿐ Homophobia. ࿐ Transphobia. ࿐ Racism. ࿐ And any other basic DNI criteria. REQUESTS + ASKS: ࿐ I do NOT do requests outside of requests of my own work, either it being my own ocs, aus or iterations. ࿐ My ask box is always open and I love getting asks/messages (I'm lonely..) ࿐ Please keep it PG in my ask box I'm literally a minor, jokes are fine but please use common sense when talking to a stranger online. ࿐ Don't fucking request NSFW, once again. I am a minor. BOUNDARIES: ࿐ Please don't repost my art or work anywhere. ࿐ If you use my work as your profile picture PLEASE give me proper credit. ࿐ For the love of god, don't flirt with me. ࿐ Don't attack me, if you don't like me or what I do simply just block me. ࿐ Please use tone tags while interacting if we aren't close.

(Last edited 11/9/24)

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strikethematch18 · 2 years ago

Text

Withdraws

Lucifer x GN! READER

word count:

WARNINGS: mentions of mental illness, depression, anxiety, self harm, medication, drug (medication) withdraws, suicidal idealations, mentions of suicide, mental health inpatient mentions

Potential Spoilers for Lesson 16 of OG Obey Me

DISCLAIMER 1: in no way am I trying to romanticize mental illness, particularly in relation to suicide and self harm. Things do not automatically get better just because of one person amd instance. If you are struggling with suicidal tendencies and/or self harm, I highly suggest reaching out to someone for help, even if it's a hotline. I am only one person but if you need someone my dms are open. Here is a list of resources such as hotlines

DISCLAIMER 2: some of the things I am describing here are my own experiences and struggles. I went through withdraws from antipsychotics but was in a controlled environment with 24/7 supervision when i was inpatient. Please do NOT just stop taking any medication without medical guidance. At the very least please safely taper your dose, do not stop all at once.

DISCLAIMER 3: There is no shame in getting help or being inpatient. If it is what you need to get better then that's that. If someone looks down on you I am proud of you.

m.list

It was by the grace of some higher power you had just earlier picked your medications up at the pharmacy on the day you were summoned into the Devildom. It was also thanks to that you were running short on time to get to class and shoved the bag into your backpack instead of back to your apartment instead. So for the next 30 days, your brain chemicals remained stable. Thirty days later was an an issue for the future, and wow was it ever a problem.

Of course, the effects weren't immediate. Unfortunately, you did not possess the foresight to ween yourself down so after you ran out it was cold turkey comedown time. It was a horrible experience you cursed yourself for but could not bring yourself to mention it to any of the brothers and you had attempted to do your best to hide it. You already lacked clothes and regularly wore things from the brother's closet but one morning you specifically sought out Beel to ask for a sweatshirt or some type of warmer shirt. The chills of withdrawal had set in, so you just played it off as you being cold. It was only a matter of time before the clamminess started. But for the meantime, something absurdly oversized would do the trick. Of course, you also acquired one from Levi, his only plain black sweatshirt he owned as all the others were anime printed. Levi's was what you chose to tuck into your RAD skirt with your teal collar popped over the neckline, Lucifer wasn't all too pleased by the outfit change but when you gave the excuse of you feeling cold he caved at the time.

Unfortunately, it wasn't long until cold sweats kicked in, however. When you showed up to breakfast shivering in a sweatshirt and your forehead sheen with sweat, all six brothers took it upon themselves to chastise you and then make you go back to bed to rest assuming you were sick. Those only lasted for a few days, all of them spent away from RAD.

One immediate effect you faced was your insomnia because without your sleeping medication you could not sleep until you had exhausted yourself. The brothers had not let this go unnoticed by the state of your dark circles, Asmo scolding you about how a lack of sleep will damage your skin.

Your anxiety kept you from bringing the issue of your medication up. Several panic attacks a day on top of your weening will to live plagued you. It wasn't until the incident with Belphegor and a breakdown that evening alone in your room for you to seek out help. Once you found yourself relapsing into your former self-harm behaviors. Cuts adorned your pale forearms, thighs, and hips. It took a too deep cut on your left arm for you to snap out of your haze.

You muttered a "Shit" as you searched for something to apply pressure to the wound. Once you found a t-shirt discarded on the ground and applied it you knew you had to talk to someone. You did not want to die but some part of you did and it scared you. So you peeked out the door to make sure the hallway was empty, and luckily it was. It was then you made haste to a certain demon brother's study and prayed he would be in there. This was likely the only push of courage you had left and if he was in another part of the house you were scared of what you may do.

Upon arriving through the door you could hear some faint music, good, your intentions coming through. It was perhaps your last act of courage, but you knocked on the door, and shortly after it opened.

Lucifer looked down at your face, "MC is everything alright?"

Your voice broke and a new set of tears cascaded down your eyes and your knees wobbled, "Lucifer I need help."

His eyes widened, looking down at your bloody, slashed body, and swiftly picked you up and set you on the couch, and closed the door.

"MC! What in the devildom happened to you? Who did this to you? Tell me and I'll take care of it."

"Me. I did" you whispered.

"MC?"

"Lucifer, I'm sick," he went to interrupt you but you kept going, "I am mentally ill. Have been for years. And it is taking everything I have not to have an anxiety attack and run out that door because I'm scared and I know I need help."

"Okay, we'll start by dealing with the physical damage first which requires immediate medical assistance, then we'll circle back to intervention, is that alright?" He spoke quietly and gently.

"Okay," you whispered.

Luckily the Demon kept a stocked first aid kit in his study. He had put one together shortly after hearing he would be housing a normal human exchange student.The process started with the cleaning of each area and then bandaging and wrapping. Until he reached your left forearm where the deepest cuts were located. Using the dominant hand always resulted in more pressure control.

Upon examining he said, "MC, I think some of these need stitches. I am not adept and comfortable doing them myself. Will you please allow me to contact Simeon or Solomon? I imagine you want to keep the circle small, especially so in this house?"

After a moment you shakily replied, "If anyone, Simeon, please. I trust him more out of the two."

"Alright then, I'll give him a call to come over. Will you be alright in the meantime?" Your response was just a slow nod.

"Okay, I'll be right back. Just keep applying pressure."

After selecting Simeon's contact, he selected call and waited for the angel to pick up his D.D.D. up.

"Simeon? I need you to come back to the House of Lamentation."

"Someone requires medical attention I cannot give-

"When I give you the answer, I need you to remain calm and discreet. This is an extremely delicate situation."

"It's MC and they need stitches."

"I believe we would both rather not elaborate on the phone."

"Just come in and to my study. Try not to draw attention from my brothers either."

"Thank you, Simeon"

After hitting the call end button he makes his way back to you. Lucifer proceeds to sit beside you in an attempt to not intimidate you, he is aware he can have that effect on people, he just wanted you to feel safe and comfortable. As he studied your frame he could tell how weary you were.

"MC, if you are comfortable you're welcome to lean into my side until Simeon gets here if it would help. I do advise that at this time you refrain from sleeping since we're not certain on blood loss."

You decided to take him up on his offer. After all, you did come here not because he was the oldest or because of his rank, or because of the nature of the exchange program. You came to him because he makes you feel safe and cared for more than anything else.

"Thank you."

After a few short minutes passed and Simeon knocked and opened the door, surely not expecting your state. At first, he was concerned something happened concerning Belphegor again but after a quick look, he understood these were self-inflicted. His stomach lurched and his heart hurt knowing you were in that kind of pain.

"Oh, MC."

"Hi Simeon," you whispered looking at him with glassy eyes.

Simeon took the liberty to forgo a traditional chair or requiring you to move too much and sat on the coffee table across from you. And offered his hand so he could see what required his assistance.

After looking at Lucifer and receiving his nod of approval you hesitantly removed the bloody t-shirt and held out your arm to Simeon.

"Unfortunately healing with my grace for self-inflicted wounds would accomplish nothing. One of the few things angels cant heal. But I am surprisingly adept in suturing."

"Everything is laid out and is sterile" Lucifer tells the angel.

"Okay MC, this is still going to hurt. I know you're already in pain and this is not going to feel good, but it will help in the long run."

"I understand."

"Lucifer, I'm going to need you to make sure she stays still."

That's how you found yourself in the lap of one of the rulers of the devildom crying into his chest as he held you while Simeon stitched your skin closed for healing.

"Okay MC, we're done, little lamb. You did great. I'm not going to ask what led to this, if you want me to know you can tell me in your own time"

"Thank you, Simeon," you said quietly.

"It's no problem MC. Take care Okay, I'm a text or a call away. And Lucifer?"

"Yes?"

"Take care of her, please"

"I will. Thank you, Simeon" Lucifer said as Simeon nodded and gave a quick peck to your forehead. And just as he came, quietly left the room and house otherwise unnoticed.

"MC dear, are you ready to talk about this now that your physical needs have been met."

"Not really but I need to"

"That's fine, don't feel rushed."

After a brief moment of silence you began, "I um, said earlier I'm mentally ill. My diagnosis includes depression, anxiety, and even ADHD,"

you took a deep breath before continuing, " before coming to the Devildom I was on medications. About 8 different prescriptions worth.

"MC, have you been off of them this whole time? Why didn't you say anything?"

"I haven't been off of them the entire time. The day I was summoned here I had just gone to the pharmacy and got my refills for the month and had them in my backpack which thankfully teleported with me. So for the first month, I was medicated. I also managed to forget to taper my doses down, so when I ran out and as they worked their way out of my system I went through withdrawals"

"Was that when you wore the sweatshirts all the time, and when you were sick shortly after?"

"If you call clammy med withdraws sick, then yes."

"MC, why didn't you come to me sooner? We would have figured this out."

"I was afraid, anxiety makes things like coming forward all the more difficult. And when you have countless panic attacks in a day, it doesn't help."

"MC, I fear to tell you this, but I will have to tell Diavolo about the situation. Not because of the exchange program, but because you need to get better."

With that, you gripped his arm, "please don't institutionalize me, Luci. Promise me you won't. I can't do that again."

His eyes softened, "MC, I promise. I believe that in our current scenario that would hurt more given the nature of your knowledge regarding the three worlds and the current lack of knowledge and acceptance within the human realm. For the meantime, I'll keep a watch over you."

You relaxed slightly at his statement.

"MC, I must ask, how do you feel right now?"

"I... I'm scared. I don't want to live but I don't want to die either. I don't feel safe with myself. I do not trust myself not to do anything else."

"Okay, I request then, that you stay close proximity to me at all times so I can keep you safe, I want to keep you safe because I care. More importantly,y I want you to feel safe. We can either spend nights in my room or yours. But if it's yours I cannot guarantee my brothers won't barge in. However, if you'd be more comfortable there we would figure it out."

"Can we..alternate for a bit?"

"Of course. You and I are going to take a few weeks off from classes and student council activities. It's going to take time for you to heal both physically and emotionally, the last thing you need to do is worry about coursework. And I want to be here for you, I want you to depend on me as you need because you are not alone in this MC. We'll work on getting you back on your meds and we can see what we can do regarding therapy."

"Thank you, Luci. But I don't want to inconvenience you or burden you."

"Preposterous. I'm doing this because I want to. You're not an inconvenience or a burden," he stated, "now in the meantime,e I do need to finish this last bit of paperwork. If you would rather go to bed, it can wait though.

"Go ahead and finish, I can wait a little longer."

"Thank you, MC, it should only be 20 minutes or so. Make yourself comfortable and we can sleep in my room tonight," he said before getting up and sitting back at his desk.

You looked at him longingly before he asked "MC? Is there something you need dear?"

Meekly you reply, "can I um, will I be a bother if I could sit in your lap? Earlier your heartbeat was soothing to me."

His face softened and he gently smiled. Lucifer stood up, swiftly lifted you up went back to his chair, and sat down with you on his lap.

"Never a bother dear."

Lucifer knew it would take a lot more than him being here to get you well again, and this wouldn't be fixed overnight. But he was willing to do whatever it would take to get you better.

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