#danzō x tobirama

[hiruzensux]

Kagami x Hiruzen thoughts

not at all put together, just kind of dumping all my assorted thoughts out here (sex-centric but not especially graphic, mostly just putting it under a cut bc longish)

like mainly just in a friends w/ benefits way... just besties getting off together

(or idk, maybe there could be some romo on Hiruzen's end? hard to say — i think friendship and romance aren't that clearly delineated for him. but in any case, if present, any romo is background enough not to spook Kagami lmao)

probably definitely were each other's first time

""practicing""

...like actually practicing though.

their catastrophic horny levels are what drew them together, and together they pursue their shared dream of attaining sex godhood

imagine... just balls-deep in your homie like "fuck yeah, we're gonna be SO GOOD at sex"

stamina training. advanced sex positions. secret oral techniques.

they incorporate the occasional henge-no-jutsu, to ensure they're both thoroughly cross-trained on varied anatomy (and hopefully not for more specific impersonation purposes... there's absolutely no reason for this to happen, but i'm currently being haunted by the idea of Tobirama walking in on himself fucking himself and having to seal the transformation jutsu as forbidden just like the shadow clone jutsu)

...but anyway, it totally worked. they're both objectively amazing in bed.

i'm sure their teammates are probably aware of what those two get up to together (Danzō definitely is, since they're trying to get him in on it)

Koharu finds out about Biwako's crush on Hiruzen and is like "you know he's totally banging Kagami, right?" and Biwako thinks she's just messing with her... but then when she and Hiruzen eventually do hook up and he's asking how it was for her, she's like "it was great — except that thing you did with the [xxxxxxx], that was weird" and Hiruzen, shocked and confused, mutters to himself like "??? but... Kagami loves when i...?" and she's like "oh my god it's true"

(no accounting for different tastes. maybe Kagami's just a freak lol)

if they own it though, it could honestly revolutionize the wingmanning game — *straight bro voice* "he's a great guy" < "he fucks like a machine and eats ass like he's made for it, and if you're not taking him home with you, i am" hands down, no contest

plus the added mystery: is he flirting with me too? is he flirting with him? is he flirting with both of us?

and honestly, ideal threesome tag-team if ever i saw one — on top of each of their individual prowess, a) experience means they work together flawlessly; b) perfect balance of cooperation and competition; and c) no shortage of chemistry between the two of them, but they're already getting plenty of one-on-one time, so the third person is getting ALL the attention — #3's in for the time of their life

...another selling point i'm certain they make sure to highlight to their shared targets

ex. "OH, sorry Sensei; didn't see you there, otherwise we wouldn't have been talking so loudly about our shared sexual exploits — that is, both of us, Hiruzen and I (together, at the same time) sharing another person (sexually), as we regularly do, and are so good at; how embarrassing that you had to overhear about all the orgasms we (together) gave this other vague and nondescript person (i guess you'll just have to fill in the details with your imagination of who you want to be in this situation), for that information was meant to be between me and Hiruzen. (like a third person was / would be / can be, if youthey would only give yourtheir students a chance)"

[hiruzensux]

Hiruzen x Enma size difference issue (bc i'm horny and have no self control)

(under a cut bc vague to semi-graphic descriptions of sex (and related injury at the end there))

Just thinking abt these two and how they can fuck without Hiruzen dying / suffering permanent injury, because I think they're up against some anatomical challenges.

(Apparently i couldn't decide whether this was supposed to be a logistical analysis, a joke, or just horny.txt, so... apologies for the tone fluctuations throughout)

It’s safe enough if it's Hiruzen in the penetrative role + Enma receiving, but i don’t know if that’s going to be quite enough for Enma? i think Hiruzen is reasonably well-endowed in relation to the rest of his body, but he’s a pretty small guy, and Enma is... Large™️. I’m not usually especially into fisting but that might be the only thing for it here

re: Hiruzen's ass: Enma’s fingers look like a pretty satisfying size but i’ve seen his nails and i have Concerns lmao

But there’s plenty of other stuff they can do besides penetration...

There’s always handjobs; Hiruzen using both hands, Enma using... idk a few fingers?

Oral is an option, but i’m honestly not sure Hiruzen could get his mouth around it; mostly just a lot of licking while, again, his hands do most of the work

Frotting is size-difference-friendly. I’m sure intercrural is a big hit with them too (Hiruzen seems like he's got fuckable thighs)

You know, I bet they could actually do both at once; Enma can be behind him and Hiruzen squeezing him between his thighs and if they angle it right, Enma's dick is big enough to slide through with enough length leftover to rub against Hiruzen's with each thrust (and can you imagine how that must look from Hiruzen's POV? or fuck, EITHER POV — Enma can just lean forward and see everything over Hiruzen's shoulder, bc he's fucking huge)

...Honestly though, i don’t think Hiruzen would be able to resist the challenge; that enormous cock haunts his dreams and calls to him in a language his ass can’t ignore

Hiruzen on top just dripping with lube, hovering over that towering erection (freshly doused in its own bottle’s worth) trying to spread himself open as much as he can

Enma’s like “You don’t have to do this...” but in his mind's eye Hiruzen sees Kagami's face and he's just like “Yes. I do.” and just sits on it

it takes a minute or so of sitting on it; shifting around, trying to get that huge head into that tiny hole before it finally goes in and oh fuck that tearing feeling can’t mean anything good but it’s just so tight and full and it’s really too late to turn back now—

neither of them last even 10 thrusts before they both cum

...and hopefully it was worth it bc now Hiruzen gets to decide whether he's going to Danzō, Biwako, Tobirama, or just to the general hospital to explain, crying, that he needs emergency suturing INSIDE his ass bc he was having inappropriate relations with his summon and was actually horny and stupid enough to try to take his massive monkey cock

[hiruzensux]

In some college au, what does Tobirama teach? And who gets sextra credit?

hmmmm... i’m not really into AUs outside of like canon-divergence, but i think i can try and do something for just this ask...

I feel like there’s a lot of subjects Tobirama could teach — probably any of the core sciences... or maybe Forensic Science? Anatomy and Physiology? Something that involves cutting up dead people probably

But in any case... Tobirama’s kind of a hardass. I don’t think he’d give extra credit just for sex. It’s more like, you do enough extra credit (on top of doing well in the class anyway) and you might get to fuck him... but he still won’t change your grade. Doesn’t matter how many times you make him cum, an A- is an A-.

But fortunately, i don’t think the students fucking him even need the extra credit. Hiruzen’s such a nerd, he probably does the extra credit in ALL his classes — for fun, since he’s already got 100%. Which is exactly what Tobirama finds so hot about him. Up at his desk during lecture just sweating, watching Hiruzen enthusiastically taking notes. Hiruzen approaches Tobirama at the end of an extra credit session like “Thanks so much for letting me do these extra labs with you. I just love your approach to the curriculum, i always have so much fun with your assignments.” and Tobirama basically just bends over the desk for him.

Kagami’s not so much of a nerd on principle, but he is in Tobirama’s class. His was a much more deliberate, calculated seduction. “I know i got a 98% on the midterm, but i feel like there’s some stuff i’m not quite understanding; would you be willing to meet with me sometime to go over it? Maybe over coffee?” Makes an effort to find out about Tobirama’s personal life; works on building a relationship outside the classroom. (Not that they don’t fuck in his office between classes once the sexual element is established.)

Danzō doesn’t have the nerve to go after him directly, just leaves him anonymous gifts and writes a 4000-word love confession in the class reviews

[hiruzensux]

cursed Danzōs for anon💖 (5/5)

least cursed    [1] [2] [3] [4] [you are here]    most cursed   

N S F W,  Danzō/Tobirama: non-con, necrophilia. d...don’t read this

(picking up from [4])

I’m sure after Tobirama died, Danzō was able to get some time alone with the body. He might have even been the one who prepared him for burial. I’m not sure exactly what sort of state the Gold and Silver Brothers left him in, but i’m sure Danzō cleaned him up as best he could. 

Maybe it was gentle, like the first time. A tender last goodbye to his teacher, his idol, his world. 

Or maybe it was... less gentle. Danzō is grieving. He’s bereft. And he’s seen Tobirama in a new light — and i don’t just mean the inside of his rib cage. Tobirama betrayed him. He betrayed the village. He betrayed himself — or everything Danzō had thought he was. How could he? How could he let his emotions cloud his judgement like this? How could he let himself die for them? How could he choose Hiruzen? It was wrong. It was unfair. It was stupid. Danzō had never imagined Tobirama could be stupid.

Maybe he’d be angry. Maybe he’d want to be rough with him — to punish him. Or just to take out his grief and anger on this broken body that used to hold his most respected person — not just gone now but shattered, destroyed, ruined. 

Or maybe he just wants to lose himself in the physical feeling of him; he doesn’t have to worry about waking him now. Bury his heart in animal lust, bury himself in the sweet, cold flesh beneath him and fuck it til it won’t grip anymore 

I'm sure he cried this time too. Understandable.

He’ll... have to clean him up again for the funeral   

[hiruzensux]

cursed Danzōs for anon💖 (4/5)

least cursed    [1] [2] [3] [you are here] [5]    most cursed

N S F W, Danzō/Tobirama: non-con, drugging, somnophilia. Very Cursed.

On a darker note, i was thinking about whether i could see Danzō’s desire for Tobirama ever getting anywhere in canon... But i think Tobirama just isn’t into him like that. Even if Danzō had the nerve to try to force him, i don’t think he’s strong enough to (not to mention what would happen after — Danzō would be lucky if it were Tobirama who ended him). So i don’t think anything could’ve happened with them...

....

...Not with Tobirama conscious.

I’m not sure what kind of sedative drugs there are in the Narutoverse, but Danzō’s a medic; he’s got to have some knowledge of such medications. I don’t think Tobirama’s the easiest person to drug, but if anyone’s sneaky enough (not to mention, a trusted student), it’s Danzō. Slip it in his tea, wait for him to fall asleep...

I’m sure he’d be very gentle about it. Not only does he have to be to avoid leaving any evidence, but i think he’d only want to touch his perfect sensei with utmost reverence. I think he’s still terrified by the idea of topping him at all, but given the circumstances he doesn’t really have much choice than to take the lead.

He’d treat him with nothing short of worship. Taking his time, memorizing every inch of him; i wonder if that was the first time he envied the sharingan; the ability to record indelibly inside his skull every detail of this moment, the only one he’d ever have...

I’m sure it was very romantic. Lots of whispered “i love you”s. Danzō probably cried. I’m not sure i quite have the stomach to write it all

And that was it: the first, last, and only time.

Unless... 

(picks up in [5] ((cw: necrophilia)))  

[hiruzensux]

cursed Danzōs for anon💖 (3/5)

least cursed    [1] [2] [you are here] [4] [5]    most cursed

N S F W; in Danzō’s mind: Danzō/Tobirama. in actuality: just Danzō and... borrowed belongings. more cursed. more embarrassing. i died writing this.

It’s a bit risky, but maybe if he’s a little drunk, or just going mad with his unreciprocated pining... Danzō sneaking into Tobirama’s office...

Digging through the desk drawers for the spare shirt Tobirama keeps in there; closing his eyes and just burying his face in it, breathing in his scent; it smells just faintly musky... did he wear it while sparring? Or maybe... getting a different kind of sweaty... maybe this was the shirt sticking to his skin while he got all hot and bothered in an office rendezvous, hastily cast aside before he was ravished against this very desk...

Danzō carefully perches on the edge of the desk like Tobirama would have, lies back against the cool wood with the borrowed shirt over his face and imagines Tobirama above him, palming himself through his clothes pretending it’s his sensei’s hands...

Leaving it up to interpretation whether it’s now, or 10 min later when he’s two knuckles deep in himself crying into “Tobirama’s” shirt, when Hashirama comes in to look for... the shirt he left earlier.

If Danzō doesn't mercifully die of humiliation at that very instant, he has to endure a very gentle talk from Hashirama about boundaries and innapropriate behavior, and how, while Hashirama values him as a young shinobi of the Leaf, and is flattered by his interest, he nonetheless cannot return Danzō's feelings for him.  

[hiruzensux]

cursed Danzōs for anon💖 (2/5)

least cursed    [1] [you are here] [3] [4] [5]    most cursed

N S F W, Danzō/himself but in a Danzō/Tobirama way. technically more cursed but less detail

Danzō henge-ing his shadow clone into Tobirama and making it fuck him

MAYBE even trying to top the clone. I don’t know if he’d have the nerve though... too intimidated by his idol, doesn’t even realize he’s a fucking bottom r.i.p.

Perhaps more cursed yet, making the Tobi-clone talk to him in Tobirama’s sexy deep voice: “i love you, Danzō.” “You’re the one who really understands me, Danzō.” “You’re so much stronger and prettier than Saru.” “Kagami who?” “Danzō, i want you to be the next hokage.”    

[hiruzensux]

thinking about if Tobirama ever took Kagami and Hiruzen on a mission with just the three of them and Danzō going mad with paranoia bc he already suspects those three are fucking, and they come back and those two are deliberately as suggestive and innuendo-y as possible like

Hiruzen: “It was a pretty sticky situation... Fortunately, Kagami and i are used to working closely together under Tobirama-sensei.”

Kagami: “Yeah me and Hiruzen were in a pretty tight spot for a while but Tobirama-sensei made sure we came out on top in the end.”

Danzō: *having a stroke*