#damn I wonder why I love giant robots

[ultra-phthalo]

Yup 1 AM

Oh my. Just got a message at 1am just now from my Dad that he is going through my stuff. And he couldn't be bothered to give me a warning.

I guess RIP nice clothes, art supplies and the 20 Lost light IDW books I bought from Scotland. He's begging that I should stop spending "money on material things." Buddy most of the suff I have are hand me downs and gifts. And he's claiming I haven't used it. I'm sorry how am I suppose to make a leather knife look used? Smear rust on it?? Snap pencils. Rip pages and leave things broken? The only reason my stuff is near to him is because I had to to rush out of the building I was staying at. And then never figured out how to plan bringing that stuff back into my new place. And I'm thankful he helped.

But it's so funny to think he is actually going to look at the Blitzbee art I printed off. hfdhgdfh. Silly.

I just kind of gathered art work of my fave pair and made a collage with the artists pfps and comments they made. These are the power point pages I made. Before printing them off.

I have a feeling I'm going to be losing things. He really dislikes machines. He says they are awful. That things should be natural. So he'll immediately judge me for my interests. And I have no way of telling what he would do with that. And ontop of that he wants me to be his perfect little Tarn.

[ipostwhatiwant1202]

What They Text You: Applies to any...cause they're all a bunch of dorky teens and i dont care what anyone says.

Leo:

• look at my new plant

• would you like to have tea tomorrow?

• you look so pretty 😍 leo you cant see me and? i bet you do

• am i really an old man???? 😭😭😭

• be honest, do you think raph can beat me in an arm wrestle? if you dont answer in 5 minutes, i will assume it's yes and i will prove you wrong.

• good morning honey. have a wonderful day today! ❤️

• are you still mad at me...? LEO YOU SET MY MICROWAVE ON FIRE. so is that a yes?

• have you eaten yet? you need to eat...and drink something other than (your favorite drink)

• i got benched because i can't stop throwing up. i'm fine! leo...you threw up blood literally 10 minutes ago. it was only a little 🙄

• i'm in desperate need of a kiss right now.

• check out my new katanas

• remember that i love you 🥰🥰❤️

• for the last time, i wont download tik tok. you know how bad i hyperfixate 😠

• stop playing candy crush and pay attention to me

• keep it up and you won't get the knots worked out of your shoulders.

• mikey just called me a boomer...i feel like i should be offended. you are a boomer. I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

• y/n, i love you, but for the love of god, PLEASE PICK UP YOUR SOCKS.

• *drunk* im in a relationship why do i have your name as my love cause my girl/boyfriend/partner will definitely not like that and i dont know who you are but they will kick your ass and i dont even feel sorry cause you arent love leo...you're drunk. NO IM TAKEN

• call me cause i would like to hear about your day and i miss you

• i love you my love ❤️

Raph:

• come watch me bench im bored

• can you please come get mikey before i hit him?

• wear that giant sweatshirt to our date. ya look adorable in it

• why did you ask donnie to help you with your homework?? um...cause it's about neurons and receptors in the brain. i could've helped with google! 😒

• YOU NEED TO COME KILL THIS COCKROACH RIGHT NOW.

• hey babe. how was your day? ❤️

• have i ever told you how beautiful you are? what did you do. nothing...? i just think you're beautiful. raphael. fine..i broke casey's nose. AGAIN!?!

• i'm so tired...wanna come nap with me?

• facetime me so i can show you this cool trick spike can do

• remember how i said i was going to be more level headed? well donnie's new robot almost broke my arm and it's no more. you lasted 1 day more than the last time.

• *you sent a selfie* yeahhhh that's my baby 😍😍

• eat or im fighting you.

• jokes on you ive always been completely unhinged and it's bold of you to think i cant be worse.

• im sick. can you bring me some soup? 😣

• i miss you like a lot and i hate when you're gone

• i love you a whole lot 😘

• im just gonna start carrying you everywhere if you dont stop tripping over NOTHING. im just gonna trip harder. Y/N NO.

• mikey said we're his parents just an fyi. he's always been my son

• i made waffles. you better come eat some

• damn babe you're fine 🤤

Donnie:

• no i wont do your homework for you

• tell shelldon to stop talking back to me before i ground him for eternity

• im in a house of IDIOTS. technically it's a lair. not now y/n.

• you look like a pile of swans in that sweater 🥰

• i can't sleep. wanna play online scrabble?

• sweetie you need to eat more than a bag of gummy worms and a bag of doritos

• you need to come sit with me while i work because i need an extra set of eyes. you just miss me 😏 don't start.

• don't call a plumber! i know how to fix the sink. i got this 😎 donnie the pipe exploded the last time you "had" this.

• *you sent a selfie* you look nice

• im gonna blow up. a person, a thing, a place, all of the above? yes.

• you need to drink straight broth, it'll help soothe your stomach ache

• im dying. you have a cold.

• i love you but please stop trying to assemble ikea furniture on your own.

• good luck on your exams/work project! 😘

• TELL RAPH TO STOP PICKING ME UP TO MOVE ME.

• leo just called me an asparagus. i didn't know how to respond so his phone will self destuct in 5 minutes. DONNIE.

• you're so pretty 🥺

• i made you something and you have to come get it right now. im literally about to have my wisdom teeth out. reschedule it

• listen to the playlist i made you or else im disabling your pirated tv show service

• thanks for listening to me 💜

Mikey:

• babe come snuggle with me

• i made you brownies so come eat them with me while we watch crognard

• i haven't seen you in so long 😭 you saw me this morning. BUT THAT WAS HOURS AGO

• angelcakessssss i love you

• look at this cat video i found

• FACETIME ME THERES A PUPPY

• are you awake? mikey it's 3 am. good, so would you still love me if i was a worm? go to sleep.

• i bet you look like a cuddly bear today 🥰

• im so hungry. can you bring me ice cream?

• raph wont stop being mean to me. can you beat him up? cause a (your height) tall human can beat a 6ft turtle's ass 😑 i believe in you.

• im coming over with my new call of duty game and we're having a game a thon!

• i found a cat. mikey no. his name is gerald. MIKEY WE ALREADY HAVE 10 OF THEM. HALF ARE NAMED GERALD.

• i made you a mixtape i cant wait for you to hear it

• how mad would you be if i crashed the shell razor in a derby and broke my arm? very. then i did not do that.

• im sick. come help me feel better 😭

• call me cause april just told me something about casey that's wild

• i found this cool rock that i think you'll like

• it's so cool i can date you. you're for real the coolest. you broke my coffee table again didn't you? no...maybe.

• im bringing you lunch cause my baby needs to eat!

• this song reminds me of you 💕

[rowiewritesstuff]

Hi! May I request a GN!Human Aircraft maintenance technician X Yandere TFP!Starscream, maybe they find him and fix him up and he decides to take them with him to be his own personal medic?

Yandere Starscream X Aircraft Maintenance Technician

I have 0 clue about jets other than hehe go fast, so the terminology will be pretty rough. Also I was fucking HYPE to write this one y’all.

You worked on aircrafts- and you were damn good at it. Not only were you good at it, but it was your passion. Everyday you get excited to get to your job. You had been doing this for three years as a civilian contractor, so you had ties to the military but weren’t technically part of it. 

The aircraft you were currently working on was a F-16. It was a gorgeous jet, one you’d love to have gone on a ride in. You gently checked around the jet for the problem, seeing that the pre ignition wasn’t firing off correctly. You got up on a tall ladder to fix the issue. You never noticed a huge robot making its way into the base.

Starscream was looking for anything to repair himself after a fight with M.E.C.H.. The organization was extremely pesky and annoying, and they had actually managed to injure him this time. He froze when he saw a tiny human repairing a jet. He looked curious at what the human was doing and stood directly behind them. 

You never noticed the huge bot standing behind you as you worked. When you made your way down the ladder you noticed the pole that wasn’t there before. You slowly looked up to see a huge robot smirking down at you. In an attempt to run away you stumbled over an air compressor and tumbled to the ground with a yelp. 

The robot clicked his tongue at you and laughed. “Well, I never knew you insects were capable of repairing something such as this. I suppose it’s only natural for you to accomplish minor sciences such as this.”

A lump was heavy in your throat. You were stumped at what to say, staring in fear and awe at the sight of him. “W-h-,” you gulped, “What are you?”

The robot laughed again, amused by your stupor. “I am a Cybertronian, from the planet Cybertron- go on, you may bow at your superior.”

Instantly, you felt irritation flood your body. While you didn’t know much about him other than he was a giant alien robot, you knew that he was an arrogant prick. You couldn’t stop your eyes from rolling. 

“How dare you roll your optics at me, fleshling?!” 

“Fleshling? Oh, if we’re slinging insults- why are you shaped like a long toaster?”

An offended sneer grew on his face. “I don’t know what a toaster is, but I am NOT one! I should squash you right where you stand!” He went to slam a hand onto you, but he grunted and grabbed his side in pain. 

You felt slightly bad for it. “Are you…okay?”

His face twisted into a snarl, but then he paused. He looked from you to the jet and then to the tool in your hand. “You are… a medic?”

You blinked. “Uh, I’m an aircraft maintenance technician.” You backed up slightly at the grin that covered his face. His sharp talons descended on you and snatched you off of the ground.

Screams filled the air as you were lifted by your hoodie. “Silence, human!” You shook with fear but grew quiet as the robot’s tone calmed down. “You will repair me, and perhaps I will spare your pathetic life.”

“A-and if I don’t?” The robot tightened its grip on you and you nodded quickly, getting the picture. He could use one finger and turn you into a puddle.

As he put you down and you got your tools, you wondered if you could even repair him. He sat down with a loud clang that startled you. When you began repairs, you noticed the symbol on his chest.

“So… got a name? And what’s that symbol?” You asked as you inspected the damage- it looked simple enough to repair.

The large robot huffed and puffed out his chest. “My name is Lord Starscream, a powerful Decepticon. This is the symbol of our great Decepticon race.” 

“... I see.” You thought that it was weird that he called himself ‘Lord’. It must be a weird power thing. It was clear to you that he wasn’t friendly, though. You just wanted to finish this repair and get out of here.

After welding one area shut gently, you finished. You backed away. “Okay, all done.” 

Starscream stood up, moving his body. He nodded slightly in approval, before glancing at you again. “For a fleshy you did… a decent job. Though not as good as I would have.”

Your eye twitched slightly. “Then why didn’t you do it yourself, if you’re so good at it?” 

He stammered for a moment before huffing in anger. “It was a weird angle! I could have done it myself, but why would I waste my time when I can make someone else do it?!” A threatening step was made towards you, crashing into the ground loudly. Your body fell to the ground. Fear consumed you. 

“O-okay, I get it!” You gulped. “I did what you asked, so let me go!”

Starscream looked thoughtful for a moment. A wicked look spread across his face as he laughed loudly with his raspy voice. “Ah, but perhaps you can still be of use!” 

When he reached out, you jumped up to run away. If you just got further in the hangar, you were sure he couldn’t reach in there or follow you. Ducking under his hand, you slid into the doorway. He waved his hand in the door as far as it could go - it almost reminded you of when someone tried to grab a pickle from a jar.

As you ran through, he shouted at you in a language you knew wasn’t from Earth. You ran to the otherside of the hangar to get out and to your car- you saw the missiles on him, and you wouldn’t stand a chance if you stayed there. 

Fumbling the phone out of your pocket, you dialed a number- your handler, Agent Louis. He picked up after the fourth ring. “What the hell do you want, this better be good seeing that it’s five in the mo-” 

“LOUIS! I’m being fucking chased, I need backup NOW! It’s some kind of robot thing- it’s heavily armed!” You turned the keys, changing the gear. You slammed on the clutch, accelerating at such a fast pace your head spun.

You could hear shuffling. “Where are you? Coordinates!” 

“I don’t know!” you sobbed, “I’m near the base somewhere, going towards the woods- I think if I can get there I can ditch the car and hide!”

“Okay, I’m going to hang up now-”

“No! Don’t ditch me you asshole!” 

“I have to call reinforcements! Just get to the woods and hide!” 

With that, you were alone to your racing thoughts. You heard loud slamming behind you and you looked in your mirror.-Starscream was destroying the base to look for you. He then noticed your Jeep driving away as fast as it would go and did something that shocked you to your core- he changed into a harrier jet to pursue you. 

Your foot lifted slightly on the clutch for a moment in shock, until you snapped out of your stupor and slammed on it again, driving to the woods. You were so close- but you knew deep down you couldn’t outrun a jet. 

The high-pitched sound of a jet echoed in your ears as Starscream pulled ahead of your Jeep. You slammed on the brakes as he transformed before your very eyes. The Jeep was going to flip, but Starscream caught it in his claws. 

You didn’t realize you were screaming until he yelled at you to shut up. His claws scratched along the car, making a horrible noise. Your hands raised up to cover your ears. 

When you looked up, Starscream had a smug look on his face. “Truly, you flesh creatures are such ignorant creatures. Did you really think you could escape me, a superior being?” His claw reached out and trailed against your cheek. “You’re lucky you’re of use to me, or I would have crushed you into paste.”

You shook with fear as he cut the seatbelt with his claw, pulling you out of the car. He transformed and threw you into the air. You landed in the seat of his jet-form and he flew off into the early morning.

[yallemagne]

So I finished the first season of X-Men: The Animated Series of course. Highlights?

Episode 1 & 2: Night of the Sentinels

Jubilee's father really fuckin sold her out huh? And holy shit the fucking sentinels. Dog, why did you MAKE THEM SO BIG. I had expected like that they started small and got bigger ones when the X-Men were revealed, but no, without even alerting the nation that they were making these robots, they sent a giant ass robot into a mall to capture one teenager.

Me pointing out "huh Morph is getting a lot of moments here, I like it" followed by them immediately dying. Like damn. They really did that. No wonder the creators backed out of having Thunderbird be in Morph's role, that would have just been insulting. Especially since he probably wouldn't have been brought back.

"Tell Cyclops... I made him a convertible."

Cyclops refuses to apologize for leaving without Morph and Beast but instead offers Logan an opportunity for revenge. It's so them. These petty bastards.

Episode 3: Enter Magneto

Beast... you're so silly. So, Beast refuses a rescue by Magneto (he's imprisoned) because "I'm awaiting a fair trial that will prove my innocence"... girl. You are a giant blue man. So, yeah, another case where Magneto was right.

Sabretooth is such a fake-ass bitch, I love it. So, he shows up at the trial causing a ruckus and gets injured and the X-Men take him in and start treating him like their pathetic little meow meow. This couldn't possibly go wrong.

"Come on, they're gonna kill him!" "Good." *turns around* "WHAT?"

"He's a threat." "He was near death." "Not near enough."

They just keep giving Wolverine all the best lines.

Episode 4: Deadly Reunions

Sabretooth, my poor little meow meow... all you did was a few itty bitty kitty murders... That's what Charles is saying at the start of this episode.

Xavier truly does try to get to the root of Sabretooth's anger with some super therapy, but alas, Sabretooth is just That Bitch. We do know that a competent telepath can temper his anger though, just look at Birdy.

They leave Jubilee alone with him acknowledging full well "this man is more dangerous than Wolverine... have fun babysitting!" He's restrained in a chair growling "let me at 'em" as Senator Kelly is being racist on TV and Jubilee very kindly turns it off and he's like "sowwy I'm twying to be a good boy... 😿" So of course Jubilee sees his restraints are hurting his wrists and releases him to help. Hahahaha. Oh girl.

If this were a show being produced today, I could totally see Sabretooth being accepted by the X-Men because "daww look he's angry just like you Wolverine" being drawn out into a longer arc where he actually gains their trust so it creates a genuine rift in the team... but also maybe he's not that patient for a scheme like that.

(also I know the show probably isn't going with the continuity that they're blood-related, but Wolverine telling them Sabretooth is nothing but trouble and getting hit with "but he's just like you 🥺" is very brother-coded okay?? Anyone who has a terrible older brother can relate.)

"Alright you egg-sucking piece of gutter trash. You always liked pushing around people smaller than you. WELL, I'M SMALLER! TRY PUSHING ME!!" << that's some little brother dialogue.

(… Morph would have listened to Wolverine about Sabretooth. Morph knows the Deep Lore.)

Episode 5: Captive Hearts

Callisto saw Cyclops and immediately said "I'm gonna make him my trophy husband", and while that is a valid reaction, no means no, hun.

They literally establish Storm as the Morlock's future Moses basically with her promising to come back for them when the time is right and they feel safe to breech the surface. And then they gave Magneto that role in '97. Ugh. He has the nerve to say Xavier just left them down there when it was in fact Storm that respected their right to self-determination.

Episode 6: Cold Vengeance

I love every time I see Sabretooth, he's just so silly-looking. No wonder everyone else imprinted on him like "hehe silly orange kitty" he's so BIG. He's incredibly top-heavy, just look at his bazongas.

We got through this with no sacrifice of Inuit life but a sombre sentiment that they'll be abandoning the old ways rather than rebuilding their homes.

Episode 7: Slave Island

Jubilee and Gambit have a nice little dynamic. He's the first person Jubilee used her powers to protect and she does it multiple times. I imagine he's like her cool older brother with street smarts.

No wonder Gambit was suspicious of Genosha in '97. Can't really trust that all is well when the foundation of that place was quite literally built with slavery.

This just makes Magneto's "tsk tsk Charles didn't use his wealth and resources to ship a load of UNWILLING Morlocks to Genosha for their own good" comment in '97 all the more frustrating. Man can be a dumbass.

Anyway--- CABLE CABLE CABLE. My silly little big boy.

Episode 8: The Unstoppable Juggernaut

Juggernaut is such a funny guy. I feel like usually, the big guys don't get to be the wise-cracking type, so this piece of shit was fun to watch.

Also just love Colossus, he's perfect.

Episode 9: The Cure

It's hard to feel bad for Warren when he's literally rich and funding a project that can be easily weaponized to hurt mutants. Sure, he was tricked and wasn't actually funding his "cure", but it would have been awful even if he got what he wanted. Just wear one of those collars for the rest of your life, jackass.

HOW IS NO ONE CHECKING IN ON THIS RESEARCH?? This experimentation on human beings is taking place with no government interference???

Pyro and Avalanche are fucking don't even try to convince me otherwise. Pyro, I don't care where you are from, I'm gonna be so weird about you calling every man you meet “darling”.

Episode 10: Come the Apocalypse

The public will see literally any villain and be like "A RENEGADE MUTANT!!" Like yeah sure I think Apocalypse technically is a mutant?? But like they really just profile all criminals as mutants.

Again, not sorry for you, rich boy.

Poor Rogue, having to absorb all these men's damage.

Episode 11 & 12: Days of Future Past

Bishop is a fucking traitor holy shit. Sure he gets better but damn. Girly was really like "The face-eating jaguars would never eat my face." and then was immediately told he was no longer needed.

"Someone... or something has come back through the time portal." "CHECK PLEASE! TIME PORTAL?"

"You kids better behave yourselves; I'm staying behind to babysit."

"Okay, ROUND BOY. Let's dance."

Wolverine has all the best lines.

Wonder why Mystique specifically chose to impersonate Gambit for the assassination. Perhaps he seemed the most likely? Perhaps a grudge against him for his relationship with Rogue?

Episode 13: The Final Decision

I'm so fucking disappointed that the fate of mutantkind lies in the hands of Senator Kelly because, dog, I wanna shoot him.

When you make a giant racist robot factory and even the giant racist robot factory is smart enough to recognize that mutant rights are human rights and so it resolves to protect humanity by replacing it with robots. Fucking dumbasses.

Honestly makes you wonder what the fuck Trask thought he was doing coming back in the new series. He knew that starting up another Master Mold would inevitably lead to the robots replacing politicians' brains with computers and he DID IT AGAIN ANYWAY.

Seeing Chuck and Magnus working together always warms my heart. And then they go right back to being enemies.

That Mister Sinister teaser at the end was... I'm not gonna say it.

[the-batblog]

You ever stood in front of Superman?

Not like when he's moving, or when he's saving people, but just standing there. Have you ever been in his presence? Have you ever experienced his company?

At first, there's this sense of awe. It's Superman, after all. The Man of Steel. And he's taller than anyone you've ever met, and he's built like a truck, and you just watched him punch a giant robot so hard it broke the windows of the high-rise he was next to.

But then… then your lizard brain kicks in.

And it tells you to be very afraid.

You don't know what it is at first. It takes a long time to figure it out, to see what's so wrong, what's making your hairs stand on end and your skin crawl and your spine tingle.

For one thing, he's not breathing.

He's been standing in front of you for two minutes now, listening to emergency personnel, checking up on some of the other victims of this week's mishap, and it isn't until he gets to you and opens his mouth that you realize. That it finally clicks. That you notice, unless he's talking, his chest doesn't move.

"How's your head?"

Three little words, and it's amazing how hard it makes you want to flinch. Again, why? You tell him you're fine, because the EMTs already looked you over, and then he stops looking you in the eyes for just a moment. Because he's not looking at you. He's looking in you.

He's looking at your skull. At your brain. At all the blood vessels in your head. He's not looking at you, he's looking at your meatsack, at the flesh and bone of your insides, as if they were open to the air. You're as good as dissected in that moment. He can look at everything in you, and the thought that you may as well be naked is the least intrusive thing going through your head. Because you gotta wonder how he's so calm about seeing everything that should be hidden on the inside, as if it were spread out in front of him. You gotta wonder what that does to a person's mind, seeing that.

When he meets your gaze again, it strikes you how damned blue his eyes are. They don't look real. They don't even look like color contacts. They just look CG, even though he's standing right in front of you, even though you can feel the heat coming off of his body.

"Drink plenty of fluids when you get home."

You catch it that time. As he walks away, you figure it out; what's so wrong about his voice. It's quiet, and it's polite, and his tone is only gently authoritative, but it. Booms. There's something like a ten foot drum under his words, and the air itself shivers when he talks. It must be his strength. It doesn't matter how quiet he is when his muscles are all so unbelievably strong. When his lungs and throat work under the same power as those window-shattering punches.

And then the fourth thing that sets your teeth on edge. He walks like he doesn't weight a damned thing.

He's big, he's huge, and you've seen semi trucks wrap their bumpers around him on TV and he didn't even twitch, but every step he takes is completely devoid of substance. Of consequences. He's pretending to walk, moving his legs and body in all the right ways, but nothing squishes his heels or pulls against him when he lifts his leg. It's like he's not real. Like he's a video of a person superimposed into the world.

Superman's amazing, of course. He saves so many people and he's really truly so nice. He's probably got a lot going on, but he makes time for the whole world. But standing in front of him… it's deeply disturbing. How does anyone look at him and decide to fight him?

I love Superman and I'm thankful for everything he does. But I never want to see him in-person again.

[sharkytism]

heyyyyy ahahahaaa im back. oooo you want to share ur lapfox headcanons so bad oooooo (anything literally anything please please plea)

I'm doing the full meal

Renard: Me thinks he's of Jamaican heritage yeah born in Canada canonically but who's judging. I do like to consider his old desing as an actual phase he went through in their life and probably is still fond of it! They call it the hippie years and store ton of pics of it usually they like to look back on old times and tunes...maybe he misses people? I wonder. Also had a situtationship with adraen unrelated absolutely

Rotteen: The butch silly big sister of the lab, best friends with Ren and Darius. She's VERY extroverted, granted she got it from her father who always taught her to enjoy life at her fullest and that's what she does, or at least it's something that took her a while to realize what meant. Considering she's an ex military I'd say she thought drugs was the best way to search for that "joy" but when that failed she found halley labs and decided that she should pursue her true passion of music, I think Darius also helped her with recovery a lot. She's crushing on Kit but she hasn't told anyone besides Darius and Ren as she's aware it'd be stupid and unrealistic.

Darius: I already mentioned in my other post stuff between him and Ren so I'm saving the yapping. But basically I think he designed most of his room, I like to think they like fishes and nature a lot hence why he covers his room with plants and the robotic fishes on the giant tank (unfortunately there's no more fishes on the outside!) I think also that he invented TQBF and Bandetto when trying to look for something new in their life, a crazy idea turned into a miracle, did not expect them to fall in love. Finally for the underground garden I think he's the person closest to HHSU in the sense that he was confined with their protection so this badger is very stressed every day!

TQBF: Silly. It's silly what else can you ask from them. I also think it learned sign language to communicate with Bandetto :] They went underground once, curious as they are, only to be faced with the garden and tweesees so it is unaware of the deer's apperance for now

Bandetto: Lover of piñatas, pool toy of many squeaks <3 and a fucking THIEF of office supplies and other accessories

Emoticon: He swore he was going to retire but there goes pee paw, after his daughter enlisted on the lab he followed behind, he's always been close to Rotteen as he raised he raised her alone (he birthed that damn cat) reminiscing the old days with his old school tracker music he hopes to show to his daughter that he's still there for her. Probably made out with k2 at one point Shh

Kitsune^2: Came out as gnc thanks to mayhem, the two started to become closer after their break from music only to discover that they can have lots in common! And also because gay and lesbian solidarity <33 he's also friends with Rotteen! Xe had been chill with her for a while ever since Rotteen's ep collab! Slightly scared of Ren's extravagance

Mayhem: TALL SHARK LADYY WOOO She's also rough and loud like Rotteen, she's been trying to focus more on music nowadays anyways but it doesn't stop her from hanging around all time! I like to think she dyes her hair a lot too

Negaren: he's real to me

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: West Coast Avengers #42: ONE OF OUR ANDROIDS IS MISSING!

March, 1989

It begins here... VISIONQUEST ONE OF OUR ANDROIDS IS MISSING!

Oh, comics. You and your movie references.

Scarlet Witch: "Where is my husband? Where is the VISION?!" Wonder Man: "He -- he's gone, Wanda -- vanished as if he never existed!"

God damn it, Byrne. You know I love dialogue on comic covers.

But we're kinda jumping into things here. I don't even really feel like we need to do a last times recap because the start of Byrne's run feels like its taken a time skip forward.

Tigra has rejoined the West Coast Avengers. Hank Pym has rejoined the West Coast Avengers. WASP HAS JOINED, as more than a guest star!

Despite the cover declaring OH NO VISION IS MISSING, the beginning is a slow burn, establishing the normal functioning of the West Coast Avengers.

Implying that this new status quo has lasted long enough to be comfortable.

The Byrne run is contentious, in part due to the very story arc starting here.

BUT I WILL BE FAIR!

So lets get into it.

Scarlet Wanda wakes up from an uneasy sleep to find that despite the early hour, her robo-husband Vision is not in bed with her.

He doesn't need to sleep but still spends his nights at her side (awww) but this morning one of her husbands is missing.

Wanda checks around the guest house that she and Vision have made their home in the West Coast Avengers Compound but no trace.

Also, while she's getting dressed the narration notes that she must practice ABSOLUTE CARE not to accidentally gesture indiscriminately and cause WACKY MAGIC SHIT to happen.

I didn't think she was still experiencing that kind of magical incontinence after her training with Agatha Harkness.

But that's one of the things I've heard about Byrne's run. He prefers a certain, classic portrayal of characters like Wanda and Vision and apparently not burning down houses by pointing the wrong way is a bridge too far.

As Wanda wanders across the compound grounds, she spots Hawkeye up early and training with some absolutely ridiculous equipment.

It's some industrial looking robot arm that flails him around so he can practice his aim even while being flailed around.

I don't know how often that comes up but an ounce of preparation.

Wanda accidentally steps on the one twig on the otherwise immaculately groomed grounds and startles Hawkeye into shooting an arrow right at her.

Wanda just probabilities the arrow to lose all its forward momentum and fall to the ground.

Hawkeye shuts down the flailing and asks why Wanda is up so early. She asks the same thing of him.

Hawkeye: "Er... yeah... Well, since me an' Bobbi have been on the outs there ain't been too many reasons for lying around all day."

Oof.

You can just imagine Clint laying in bed, unable to sleep. Just staring at the ceiling and feeling the emptiness next to him. And then going 'fuck it, I'm going to go shoot things with arrows until I can't feel feelings anymore.'

Having had to admit how empty his own life is, Hawkeye repeats the question to Wanda. She explains the thing where he took off? Maybe? Without letting her know or leaving a sign. Its all kinds of weird and foreboding.

Hawkeye goes well this is why we have "eleventy skillion dollars" worth of the best communications technology.

You seriously didn't try calling him first, Wanda? C'mon.

Hawkeye calls for Vision over the intercom but only gets Hank Pym, who is also working early, running a systems check on the computer system.

See, because, he had a "biostatic analysis running overnight" and the results were off.

Also, what the hell are you doing here, Hank Pym?

You quit to fix your first wife's enormous head.

Well, that's not a happy story. Because when is it ever for Hank Pym?

Big brain lady who claimed to be Maria Trovaya was actually MODAM, the lady version of MODOK. Because MODOK is clearly a gendered name. Her not giant brain name was apparently Olinka Barankova.

She took Hank captive and replaced him with an android imposter that Hawkeye unmasked. Hawkeye and Black Widow (and Mockingbird independently) help Hank Pym thwart AIM's schemes until AIM hit the self-destruct and ran away.

MODAM went on to other things but eventually got killed by Red Skull and put on display like a big-headed trophy. While, apparently, Hank went on to just sheepishly rejoin the team.

Anyway, this went down in the Solo Avengers issue that has the same cover date as this West Coast Avengers issue so I'm surprised there's not a "wondering what Hank Pym is doing here? Check out this month's Solo Avengers for the full story!"

Anyway. Back to the point. The communications system blows out with a squawk. As if the transponder on Hawkeye's side was blasted! Or maybe there's a duck in the wiring! So Hank runs outside to confirm that there is indeed shit going down.

Shit of the most Ultron-y type possible. The Ultron kind.

Really thought he'd be gone longer after Wonder Man ripped him in half.

I know Ultron always comes back but geez.

Meanwhile, inside Tigra's bunglow, she's asleep. Not everybody is awake at ungodly hours! Take a page from her book, the Avengers!

But only the sleeping in part. Not the weird fucking dream she has.

Tigra dreams of being a tiger with a perm, hunting blue alien space deer.

But when she pounces and tears out its throat, she wakes up only to a mouthful of feathers. Having lived the punchline "and when I woke up, my pillow was gone!"

Except, I can't figure out what Tigra is sitting on. Doesn't seem like a normal bed. Maybe its a large, feather pillow and she uses it like a cat bed? Maybe its a small feather mattress and she uses it like a cat bed? Maybe don't sleep on a cat bed and you won't have cat dreams, ya dork.

I canNOT believe that I had live through the drawn-out "oh no, Tigra's cat instincts are getting the better of her!!" plotline and now we're just doing it again.

We're doing Ultron again, we're doing Tigra having cat problems again. Some fresh start.

I do hope her cat problems don't manifest as uncontrollable hypersexuality again.

Tigra is considering that maybe she should tell her teammates that she's having vivid dreams about murdering animals but a loud BOOM draws her attention and she rushes outside.

Also rushing outside is the Wasp! Hi, Jan! You definitely left so I'm wondering if we'll get an explanation for why you decided to come back and join the team.

Also also, Tigra notices that Wasp is flying out of Hank Pym's bungalow, instead of the main house where Jan's room is.

She notices it and thinks hmmmm.

A lot of writers try to put Jan and Hank back together. And a lot of writers try to more definitively break them up.

Englehart was one of the latter. He had Jan yell "divorce means divorce" at Hank when he tried to hug her. He brought back Hank's first wife and basically annulled Hank's marriage to Jan.

But, remember, Maria turned out to be a big, evil science brain so the divorced marriage is unanulled and it seems like Byrne mgiht be one of the former type of writers who want to undo undoing the marriage.

Busiek was one too. One of the creative decisions I wasn't really onboard with for his run but he tried his damndest to sell the idea, including having Hank reconcile (again) all the disparate parts of himself.

Then the following writer Geoff Johns had Wasp shoot down the idea that she'd ever marry Hank again.

It comes and goes in waves.

Less so now that Hank is turbo-dead.

Anyway.

Tigra and Wasp rush toward the training area, where they heard a big boom. And Wonder Man is rushing to check it out too.

Wasp: "Simon! You can fly faster than me! Get up ahead and reconnoiter!" Wonder Man: "Just what I was going to do, Wasp!"

You don't need to get snippy, Simon.

He grouses to himself that Wasp got too used to being in charge and that she's still barking orders like she's Captain America.

I guess there's always gotta be some kind of tension in the team. And Wonder Man always gotta be fighting someone. And he's stopped being the Hawkeye to Hawkeye.

Wonder Man flies up and sees Ultron. And like me, is surprised because he didn't think he'd see him again so soon.

Ultron blasts Wonder Man with "some kind of magnetic field blast." Not usually a weapon Ultron has so maybe he upgraded.

Wonder Man just gets off the tree that he broke with his butt and launches back at Ultron.

Simon William's nearly indestructible fists strike the robot's sterling hide like the clappers of a great bell... The sound that reverberates across the California hills has the ominous tones of a death knell!

Hawkeye cheers on Wonder Man but Dr Pym warns him that Ultron could turn the tables.

COMPLETELY UNPROMPTED, Scarlet Witch has an intense expository flashback about Vision's ENTIRE BACKSTORY.

Important for setting up future stuff but fucks sake, Wanda, get your head in the game.

You should know the drill.

Dr Phineas Horton created the Human Torch, no not Johnny. A lifelike robot that accidentally burst into flames whenever exposed to oxygen.

Jim Hammond Human Torch became a hero, the first Marvel hero. The company wasn't called Marvel but he was in Marvel Comics #1 so there.

Since Stan Lee rebooted Human Torch as a teenage human for Fantastic Four, there needed to be some explanation for why the robot guy wasn't around anymore.

And the answer is that his flame burned out of control and he exploded and collapsed in the desert.

Where he was found and rebuilt by the Mad Thinker who used him to fight the human Human Torch. Until robot Human Torch learned that the Mad Thinker was Evil, Actually, and turned against him.

And the Mad Thinker's failsafe made robot Human Torch explode again.

The Fantastic Four just left him in the Mad Thinker's abandoned base because Reed is an asshole and doesn't believe robots deserve due to the dead.

Where Ultron found him.

Anyway. Back in the here and now, Wanda remembers that she's actually in a life or death fight and that everyone else has been participating while she's been gazing off into the middle distance.

Again: fucks sake, Wanda. You're one of the win buttons against Ultron! Get your head in the game!

But Hank notices that Wonder Man's punches have been denting Ultron. Which should be impossible if Ultron is made of adamantium, as he usually is.

Figuring never asking forgiveness is easier than asking permission, Hank shrinks Wonder Man tiny size and insists he flies down Ultron's throat.

Wonder Man says, uh, no, I don't want to unshrink inside an indestructible chassis, that sounds like a horrible way to spend my time.

But Hank insists so Wonder Man does it but complains the whole time.

The Journey To The Center of Ultron is weird. The usual atomic flame that burns in Ultron's mouth (yes, that's apparently what his mouth glow is) is just an illusion.

Also, when the shrink wears off Wonder Man OH YEAHS right through Ultron instead of that not happening.

Hank explains that when he noticed that Wonder Man was actually denting Ultron, he realized it couldn't be the real deal.

But the (West Coast) Avengers were kept so busy fighting Ultron that they didn't notice the discrepancies.

Until Hank did. And instead of explaining it, he decided to demonstrate it in the most dramatic and visually interesting fashion possible.

Hank, you weirdo.

Scarlet Witch wonders why someone would send a fake Ultron and Hank realizes it was probably a distraction.

Taking charge, he yells "AVENGERS DISASSEMBLE!" which is a big oof with cursed future knowledge. But what he means is everyone split up and search for clues.

If someone was distracting the (West Coast) Avengers from something, its likely to be something around the compound.

Instead of actually helping search, Scarlet Wanda wanders off to the cliffs to moodily stare off at the ocean and CONTINUE TO FLASHBACK.

FUCKS SAKE, WANDA!

Anyway.

Blah blah blah, Ultron found robot Human Torch's body.

He wanted to rebuild it into a cool minion but Ultron apparently sucks at robots. Ironic, since Hank Pym shoulda sucked at robots and somehow built the worst one and Ultron has Hank's brain.

Anyway, Ultron kidnapped the robot Human Torch's creator Dr. Horton and forced him to rebuild the Human Torch into Vision. Making his skin red as a private joke about the flame powers he once had.

Didn't think Ultron's sense of humor ran that subtle, honestly.

After the rebuilding was done, Ultron had to erase the Human Torch's personality because he kept trying to fight Ultron. So Ultron used some Simon Williams brain tapes that he swiped from Hank Pym's lab. And with that as a base, Vision lived!

Ultron sent him to attack the Avengers where he pretty promptly defected and switched sides. And the Avengers accepted him because the Avengers are cool like that sometimes.

And it was on the Avengers that Scarlet Witch met Vision and they fell in love and got married and then Vision dry humped two babies into her, magically.

THAT SURE WAS VISION'S ENTIRE BACKSTORY, WANDA. VERY HELPFUL.

Meanwhile, the other Avengers were actually searching.

Hank Pym contacts her on some kind of video phone that stalks her to the cliffs and tells her that they found something but they really need to discuss it face to face.

And when Wanda joins everyone who was actually doing work, Hank Pym explains that Vision is "gone."

Because A) he's nowhere in the compound. They still don't know where he physically is except 'not around.'

But things have gotten a bit weirder and more sinister.

B) Hank finished that computer scan he was doing and found a sophisticated computer virus. One that found and erased every trace of Vision from the Avengers' files. All the information they had on him, every report he's ever entered, everything.

And the virus infected the East Coast Avengers' computers as well. And SHIELD (not actually around currently, so slight continuity hiccup) and the Pentagon and the Fantastic Four.

Every system the virus infected has lost all trace of Vision.

Its like he never existed. Except for all the memories everybody has of him. And also any physical record like print-outs or photographs. But digitally its like he never existed!

Hank Pym: "For this to have happened means somebody got in through our defensive network. Somebody got past all our alarms, all our codes... Everything!" Wasp: "And to do that... They'd have to be one of us!!" Hawkeye: "One of the Avengers has turned traitor! But... WHO??" Mockingbird: "Is that really so hard to guess, Hawk?"

MOCKINGBIRD

WHAT

DID

YOU

DO?

Follow @essential-avengers and be very angry with me about things that are about to happen. Like, reblog, and comment maybe. I don't know about mockingbirds but my cat definitely tried to stop me from finishing this post.

[rachiecrown]

The return of Rachie's insanity

Literally when I'm done reading this zine this blog is gonna go inactive for another long while isn't it.

Oh my god I'm gonna cry. I love everyone's writing so much

IMP AND SKIZZ CONTENT YEAHHH

I love how Skizz is literally a giant

Ohhh wait his villain name is Smoke Signal that makes senseeee

SECRET KEEPER!?!?

THE WATCHER IN BLUE WOAH that's so cool

The Altar of the Catalyst sounds so cool

THE FIGHT oh my gosh SKIZZZZ

HE KNOWWWWSSSSS

"it's not nutmeg" EXPLODES INTO A GAZILLION PIECES

Next story!! Pearlie and Gem!! Through the Looking Glass that sounds so cool...

The writing is already beautiful, I love the comparisons, I love the analogies

Catalysttttt augh the descriptions are so cooollll

The shinyduo content is so tasty I love the vibe of this bit

"Die for your ideals" what does that mean. Is that foreshadowing.

IT'S FORESHADOWING ISN'T IT

oh my god

End chapter drawing is tastyyy

NEXT COMIC'S ARTSTYLE IS SO CUTE

I love the way Gem is drawn btw

"One last time" THIS IS FORESHADOWINGGG

Heck yeah Hot Guy

CUTIEBIRD neurons activated AGAIN

"Help me and I won't call you that ever again. Promise" Liar I bet you'll say it at least one more time in the remaining 85 pages

Oh my god there's only 85 pages left

Ohhh I was wondering who Forgery was That makes sense

Forgery's expressions are so funny I love the lil sketchy doodles too

It's like Decked Out that's so cool

WAIT DID THEY GET TRAPPED INSIDE OMG

ooohhhh whhhauuoo

I don't think I'm ready

Anyways more totally real discourse site lets go

BIG RON'S!!!

The lore is loreing woah what are the pulses is it the sculk with the mutations and stuff

An evacuation.. :0

Augh I can't wait to see what happens

THINGS ARE HAPPENINGGG

PEARL AT THE END

I'm crazyyy

NEXT COMICCCC DESCENT INTO DARKNESSSSS

Ohh They're being affected tooooo

Forgery complaining lol

TWO TEK DELAY REFERENCE

Ohh and the scar on HG's neck It looks like a firework it's so pretty

THEY'RE SEPARATED

IS THAT LAVA

PLEASE THE WAY THEY HOLD EACH OTHER CEASE THIS

It's me the number one scarian shipper

THE GUILT GRIAN'S GUILT

Is that a command block

Ohhh my gosh I'm on the next story already WHAT DO YOU MEAN ONE HOUR

AUUUGH

Anyways Cover art for The Wardens Of Tomorrow looks awesome!!

They're so shaped + I love the lighting

OKAY OKAY SCULK SOLDIERS. GOT IT.

Is Impulse going bye bye :(

STOP TRYING TO SACRIFICE YOURSELVES AUGHHH

istg if they die at the end

IMPULSE STOP. IMPY NO. NO

ETHOOOOOO I love him omg

Is that Cub saying Let's go if it is I

explodes into a gajillion pieces

YEAH CUBB

ROCKET TROLLEY THATS SO FUNNY I LOVE THAT

TUNNEL BORE!?!?!

GOAT AND BUTTERCUP ROBOTS

JOE AND BDUBS!!!

SCOTT!!

Man everyone's showing up huh

Is that a haiku

There's less than thirty minutes I'm shaking

REN AND MARTYN AND BIGB

TIMMY!!?!?!??!?!?! HOW IS HE HERE WHAT I THGUOHGT

HUHHHHH

OKAY OKAY

He's

OKAY

OKAY

^ Last six lines written in rapid succession

I'm normal again guys

LITERALLY EVERYONE IS HERE

Mumbo Jumbo I love you

SHINY DUOOO AUGH THIS HURTS ME PEARL'S CHARACTER HURTS ME

She's so determined I love Pearl

Impulse's POV is so sad what

"Oh. That's right." "I don't like to see my friends sad." STOPPP CRIES LOUDLY

IMP AND SKIZZZZ WAAAAAAAA

I'M CRYING THIS IS SO WELL WRITTEN THE EMOTION I AM FEELING AUUUUGH

This is so amazing

THE AFTERMATH STUFF

WAIT WHATS HAPPENING

THE SCULK IS SCULKING NO STOP

Why is the counter still going. No. Sto

WHUH MUMBO BETTER BE OKAY

ITS A WARDENNNNNN IT'S A WARDEN PANIC PANIC PANIC PANIC

DAMN RIGHT HE ISSSSSSS

OH MY GOODDDDDD

I'M GOING CRAZYYYY

WHAT NO THE INJURY

I'M CRYING

I'M GOING INSANE

YOU GUYS CANT DO THIS TO MEEEEE

THE END!?!?!?

THERE'S STILL MORE PAGES

Oh my god oh my god oh my god OH MY GODDDDD

THE END CHAPTER ART IS SO PRETTY, IT'S SO STARRY AND BEAUTIFUL AUGH

THE LIGHTING THE SHAPES

SCREAMS

I'M ACTUALLY GOING INSANE

Oh my god there's an epilogue

Reading now.. Wish me luck,

[butterscotch-brigade]

sooo i finally watched invader zim enter the florpus!! i was gonna wait until i finished the comics first but then i saw that apparently clembrane appears in the comics after the movie?? and i didnt want to risk getting spoiled bc yknow. the movie is when he First Appears so i thought id watch it before picking the comics back up again.

anyway, here r my thoughts on the movie down below!!

it was....pretty good!! there were a LOT of positives for me, but ultimately one major thing that i really wish could have been done better (but we'll get to that in a bit). again, i liked it, i thought it was a good movie! im gonna list all the things i especially liked followed by the things that kinda bothered me a bit so bear with me lol

positivies:

i know this is an Unpopular Opinion, but i actually rly like the art style!! i still think the show's designs r better, but i rly RLY liked how vibrant and smooth the animation was in this film. plus movies based on animated series already tend to have a slightly different art style anyway (the spongebob movies and the mlpfim movie come to mind) so i didnt mind the change. add to that the fact that this movie came out 17 years after the shows cancellation and its no wonder that jhonen vasquez's art has changed since then, plus i'd imagine there was a much bigger art/animation team this time around. anyway ofc i rly loved the part where they Enter The Florpus (lol get it) and go thru all the different art/animation styles, i loooovee stuff like that and i think every animated production should do smth like that at least once solely bc i love it so much. for me

clembrane is rly funny and i love him. im glad hes here now. dib and gaz have TWO dads

PROF. MEMBRANE WAS SO FUCKING COOL????? like omg i was NOT expecting him to be so badass in this???? when he shot the giant fucking Laser Blast out of his arms and wiped out all those robots my jaw DROPPED i was in SHOCK!!!! he was hiding all that power this whole time????? DAMN no wonder hes considered one of the most important scientists on earth

the humor was really fucking funny as always w iz LOLLLL there were multiple points that made me laugh out loud. special shoutout to the callback they made to mortos der soulstealer where zim and dib are yelling at each other and zim keeps going "WHAT????" ASKDJALSKDJ thats one of my fav jokes from the show so im glad they did that here

gir aka my fav was SOOO CUUUTEEE his stupid little peace song was so funny and adorable, i love p much everything he does in this movie as usual SDKJFLDSKJ gir my beloved

even if i have some issues w it (which we'll get to shortly), i DO like seeing that dibs family really do care for him, particularly prof. membrane. hearing him say he was proud of dib did make me smile

im not entirely sure how i feel abt the tallests canonically dying, but i do think its a funny way to kill them off and end their story. like.....ofc they die bc theyre too entitled to steer their spaceship. what else would they die from SAKFJLSDKJ

all that being said, there was one major thing that kind of bugged me a bit, as well as a few minor nitpicks.

negatives:

starting off with my biggest issue, and this might be a confusing one for some, but let me explain: in my opinion, compared to the show, this movie felt just a bit too.....sanitized? "feel-good"-ish? ....happy?? now just hear me out. a large part of what made invader zim so appealing, especially to that older tween/young teen crowd (many of whom fell into the emo subculture), is the fact that, compared to other kids cartoons at the time and even today, it was a very mean-spiritied, cynical, pessimistic show. the main protagonist is a villain trying to take over the world. his rival is the show's antagonist, so audiences may find themselves rooting against him even tho hes trying to save the world. gaz is on no one's side but her own and frequently bullies her brother and does not care what happens to zim. and it works!! thats a key factor in why so many people, myself included, like the show. it isnt afraid to have unhappy/unsatisfying endings, and there are very few "happy" moments (aside from gir, ofc, who is a fan favorite for this reason; his happiness in spite of the dark world around him is a great source of irony and genuine enjoyment). and i feel like this movie lacks a lot of that cynicism and bitterness from the show, yknow? like....i like dib and i want him to succeed, but part of his appeal is knowing that he never will, or at least not in the way he wants. we want dib's family to recognize him, we want gaz to show that she still loves him, and we want prof. membrane to say that hes proud of him. but.....invader zim is not really the type of show. i understand that this is ofc a movie for kids, but again, part of what made the show so appealing was the fact that it was so dark WHILE still being for kids. the closest thing we get to any kind of "mean-spiritedness" is the tallests deaths, which, while deserved and executed in a funny way, only happens at the end. idk i just felt like this movie was kinda....playing it "safe" compared to the show it was based on yknow. but thats just my opinion idk i swear im not one of those "WHOA look at how DARK and EDGY this show is!!! that proves that its NOT FOR KIDS" types, i just feel like the overall tone was a bit lacking compared to the source material

NOW onto the nitpicks!! these werent rly major flaws that interfered w my enjoyment of the movie, just stuff that mildly irked me (lol get it). for starters i wish tak was there :( i know she was originally planned to be in the movie but they had to cut her for time constraints which is fair. still i miss her so much. tak my beloved come back to me

another nitpick, but pretty much the only other thing that i didnt like abt this movie and its SUPER minor: i dont like how frequently gaz's eyes are open throughout this movie?? ALKSJFSDLKLKDS I KNOW THATS A WEIRD THING TO COMPLAIN ABT LMAOOOO i swear it doesnt actually bother me that much but it was kind of distracting. the reason gaz's eyes are almost always closed is to add to that angry, apathetic look she always has; it conveys her personality. when her eyes DO open, they're large and cute, which is a nice contrast to her normal appearance and makes these scenes in the show/comics have more comedic impact. here, they're open a bit too frequently for my liking, and i think it made me perceive her character differently. i think she should have been grumpier LOLLL but that kind of ties back into my first point

but errmm yeah!! despite the block of text i just wrote i still rly liked this movie!! in terms of continuations to the show, however, i think i prefer the comics, although again i have not finished reading them. i just feel like theyre closer in attitude to the original show and have a lot more interesting story ideas. but again, this movie is not bad!! there were a lot of things i rly do like abt it!! im pretty easy to please tbh.

overall id say this movie has like.....7.5/10?? maybe?? its still a good movie and id probably watch it again if given the opportunity. theres a lot of cool things about it and i did enjoy myself watching it. thats just my Onion tho, lmk what u think abt it if youve seen it :) just pls be civil if u disagree w anything i said, i like hearing other ppls perspectives on things!!

[treeroot06]

My lackluster knowledge of Evangelion

A list of the few things (and probably misconceptions) I know about Evangelion as of right now. Get ready for lots of laughs and lots of haha hehes.

I think it's about controlling giant robots that are called Evas to fight and stuff

The main character is the guy with the white shirt

The red hair bitch is called Asuka and I think they're only like 14 years old

There's also a blue hair hoe

On the topic of Ms.Blue Hair Hoe, Fly me to the moon is in it. I like listening to this Ai cover of Luigi singing the song so that's nice.

I think the anime MIGHT end with everyone dying. Thanos snap style

And also that big ass head coming out of the water. not sure what's the deal with that.

I love the End of Evangelion song it sounds so beautiful and I love listening to it, but I heavily associate it with this comic called It Hurts. When I was reading the comic for the first time I was like "Oh I should play the end of eva song at the end of the comic ahyuck" I played the song multiple times because I was never sure when the comic was ending. I did the same thing a year later when I was reading Scott Pilgrim (Illegally) . When I was at the end of the comic, all I could think about was It Hurts because of the music so I'm kinda afraid the same thing is gonna happen with Evangelion, the actual thing the song is from.

I really hope y'all can actually understand what I'm saying. I often think I'm bad at putting together sentences.

For some reason the storyboard artists for Clarence made Eva fanart with the Clarence Characters.

The red hair girl does a funny scream

Uuuhhmm...

I think there's a older guy with glasses...

Oh yeah there's a third girl with black hair.

hmm

I'm really reaching here

Why didn't his bitch wife let him watch blue tho?

Congratulations

One day I was scrolling through Twitter and saw the white shirt guy standing next to a hospital bed. It was one of those "images that proceed legendary events" images. I thought "damn I wonder what happened" and forgot about it for the next five minutes. Suddenly out of nowhere I remembered the guy having the funny white stuff on his hand. When did I see that? Where did I see that? I probably didn't even know what an Evangelion was back then. Could I even speak english back then? Why did I only now remember? I was incredibly confused for the rest of the day.

And yep, that's about it. I have a lot to learn. I guess it's time to actually watch it.

THE END

[shadowonwater]

The songs mentioned:

a. Reganomics (I assume. Because this description of the song isn't accurate, so maybe there's more than one Ronald Reagan song)

b. Cabinet Man (again description not very accurate, the man turned himself into the machine on purpose, he is the machine and thus is not trapped in it)

c. Modify

d. Touch Tone Telephone

e. Amnesia Was Her Name (A guy with memory loss is in love with his doctor)

f. When He Died

g. Soft Fuzzy Man

h. Sweet Bod ("Let's eat this corpse mummified with honey, this is for health! I swear this isn't sexual in any way!")

i. Eight Wonder (inspired by the legend of Gef the Mongoose)

j. Two Trucks (having sex)

A bunch more weird songs with my own descriptions below the cut:

Ode to Crayola (a song about a guy who REALLY loves crayons. Maybe a little too much...)

Knife Fight (a pair of children challenge each other to a knife fight)

Spring Heeled Jack (a song about the urban legend of spring heeled jack, it includes many details)

The Machine (a guy builds a giant machine that does nothing, people don't understand it)

Bill Watterson (a song about stalking the creator of Calvin & Hobbes)

Ben Bernake (a weirdly homoerotic song in which a wizard is in love with a guy but also hates him. Also he needs the guys teeth to save the federal reserve)

The Satirist's Love Song ("Our relationship was meant to make fun of relationships, I don't actually love you")

Mask of My Own Face ("what if I did crimes while disguised as myself? Then nobody would think it was REALLY me!")

Aurora Borealis (Christmas love song, but also the Eldritch apocalypse)

Crypto Santa (The Santa Clause but if it was an Eldritch horror movie)

Dinosaurchestra parts 1-3 (a 3 part story about a kid using a magic eight ball to time travel and create a band with dinosaurs)

Action Movie Hero Boy (Kid wants to recreate the scene of a hero walking away from an explosion, it doesn't end well)

Lawnmower (a song about mowing lawn)

Archaeopteryx (a guy is so salty that humans can't fly that he goes back in time to kill the Archaeopteryx)

Really Cool Wig (a guy tells you about a dream where he was wearing a cool wig, but he can't for the life of him remember what the wig looked like now that he's awake and he's really upset about it)

Jaws (badly explains the plot of Jaws to you)

Goosebumps (love song that incorporates the titles of a bunch of Goosebumps books, to get the full experience watch the music video (trust me). Anyway a ghost is in love in the song)

My Trains (a guy loves model trains. He gets kicked out of the model train club. He wishes he could shrink down to ride his trains. Also he wants to get revenge on the guy who got him kicked out of the club)

Dead Sea Monkeys (a kids pet sea monkeys die and he's real upset about it)

Pumpkin Pie (Merchant makes damn good pumpkin pie. The king wants the recipe, merchant says no. Merchant gets tortured. The end)

When Robots Attack (a song about robots attacking)

Gonna Dig Up Alec Guinness (gonna use the dead body of an actor and create a tacky road-side attraction for money)

Rainwater ("Is it safe to drink the rainwater?")

Word Disassociation (word salad song, none of these words have anything to with each other and that's the point)

Smell Like a Cookie All Day (life sucks but smelling like a cookie would make it better. Something something small joys help make life good. Humans still suck, and why can't we all just get along)

Anyway this is a solid chunk of his discography but he's got plenty of other stuff. Like there are some songs that would be really hard to explain the plot of and that run more on vibes than anything else.

Anyway I focused on the albums Damn Skippy, I am become Christmas, View-Monster, Dinosaurchestra, and Nature Tapes. But there are other albums I didn't touch on.

A lot of OPs songs are from Spirit Phone so I wanted to focus on some of Neil's other work.

“ohhh i’m so tired of love songs i wish people would write more original stuff” literally listen to lemon demon. some of his song topics include

Ronald Reagan fights his evil shadow self

Guy is trapped inside an evil arcade machine that kills people

You can do what you want to your body! dye your hair! get that tattoo! pull your teeth out! stick screws in your eyes! rip your arms off!

disgraced scientist is disgraced

I forgor 💀

Guy died and a bunch of cool haunted shit happened and it was really spooky

Please date me i’m a really nice ghost i mean normal man

I’m eating a corpse and it’s soo tasty and homoerotic come join me

ohohoho i am a Creature

well you probably know what two trucks is about

[the-light-finds-its-way]

It's Valentine's Day!! You know what that means?? Time for your favorite gay robots to be in the spotlight!!! :3

Misraaks wakes up to Anthem clutching him tightly. He chuckles, and gently shakes his husband to tell him to let go.

Anthem groans, and does as he's told. He says to Misraaks that there's something in the kitchen for him.

Confused, Misraaks gets up, and walks toward the kitchen. Suddenly, his eyes fall upon a gigantic 3 tiered cake made of Ether based flour and icing, decorated in rainbows and hearts, with writing on the base that says, "Love ya, Kell of m'heart!"

Immediately, Misraaks knows Anthem can't bake to save his life. He must have had this custom made.

Anthem walks downstairs groggy, and grins. "Do ya like it, hon?" he asks.

"Almost as much as I love you," Misraaks replies. "Where did you get this?"

"Gadrax. Commissioned it from'm." Anthem walks to his husband, and kisses him. "Dig in, sweetheart. May today be as sweet as you!"

------------

Magnus gets a mysterious encrypted message to go to the Tower. Raising an eyebrow, he wonders who this is from, but curiosity is his driving force. So, he follows the coordinates, and finds himself in the Tower, standing before a jump course.

The Titan groans. He HATES jump courses. He's a damn Titan, not a Hunter, and he can't aim his jumps for shit.

He receives another encrypted message. This one tells him a prize lay at the end, should he complete this course.

Groaning even louder, Magnus starts. He immediately falls off, dying at his first jump.

Einar knows he's going to have one hell of a day needing to revive Magnus a ton. And that's exactly what happens. After thirty revives, Einar stops counting.

Finally, Magnus is almost at the end. Taking a deep breath, he jumps, and tumbles onto a platform, then slams against something. Looking up, he sees Cayde looking over him with a grin, wearing a rainbow cape, and holding Ace. Above them both, there's a rainbow banner that says, "HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!" And Cayde blows a stupid popper thingy and everything, rainbow confetti flying all over Magnus.

Magnus laughs. He stands up, and hugs Cayde and Ace. He kisses his husband, and smiles. "How high up are we, and how'd you get our son up here safely?"

Cayde laughs now. "Unlike you, I'm good at coordination. Ace was strapped to me the whole time, and I made it without falling even once."

"Oh rub it in, why don't you?" Magnus chuckles happily.

Together, he and Cayde, with Ace, turn to look out toward the sky. The Traveler looms overhead, shining bright, its warmth filling them both.

----------

Kahun flies erratically to Neomuna. Rushing his way through asteroids, toward the balcony where Nimbus is. When he lands, he crashes the ship a little, the hull banging against the edge of the landing bay before he parks it.

Nimbus laughs. They know their boyfriend can't fly for shit. But here he is, trying anyway.

Kahun steps out of the ship, and runs to Nimbus, throwing his arms around them. "Hey babe!!!!" he shouts excitedly.

With a warm smile, Nimbus kisses Kahun. "Hey, hon!! I didn't know you were coming!!"

"How couldn't I?" Kahun says. "I missed you!!" He looks at Gul'tan, his Ghost, and nods. "Bring it in!"

Nimbus raises an eyebrow.

Gul'tan twirls about for a moment, and glows. Shining his light on the ground, something begins to materialize.

There, the tiniest sparrow ever made appears, in nonbinary colors. It's so small, it's like 1/3 the size of the giant Cloudstrider.

Nimbus laughs. They look at Kahun awkwardly.

Kahun grins. "For you!! I built it!! You can get around Neomuna faster with it!! Try it!!"

Laughing even more, Nimbus says they can't fit.

Kahun tells them they can! He measured it to be the minimum size needed for them.

Nimbus can't help but burst out in laughter now. They realize Kahun deliberately made this thing tiny. A small sparrow, for a giant person. They step into the sparrow, and, grinning, find that they fit perfectly.

"Love you, sweetie," Kahun says, and he bends down to kiss his partner.

----------

Gadrax scuttles up to Lord Shaxx, taking the man by surprise and throwing all four arms around him.

Shaxx laughs, smiling, and leans his head against the Eliksni Titan.

Gad proceeds to ask, "So? Crimson Days match. With or against each other?"

"I'll crush you like an ant either way," Shaxx replies, chuckling.

Gad's eyes grow big, and he smiles. "Crush me PLEASE!!" he begs.

Shaxx is now doubled over laughing uncontrollably. "In what way would you prefer?"

"You KNOW what way."

Shaxx literally cannot stop laughing. He hugs Gad tight, pressing the Eliksni's head to his chest. "Alright, fine. Meet me tonight, and make sure Dexo is ready to revive you."

Gadrax grins, nodding. "You got it!!"

Later that night, the entire Crucible arena is closed off. Gadrax and Shaxx meet, and proceed to beat the everloving shit out of one another with raw strength and guns.

Ultimately, Shaxx wins, and he and Gad both go out for ramen afterwards.

[jules-and-company]

starting a long post on tas so that that shit is wrapped

episode 4 : only the men being affected by the sirens ? (also everyone seeing women but bones only sees magnolias in blossom ?) then why the fuck do you send an all-male away mission party you absolute MORONS. and bones’s accent is definitely stronger when something’s messing up with his head (taking personal note of that for fic reasons). uhura and christine in charge ? YES. UHURA TAKING COMMAND ??? YASS GIRL. scotty is that you singing. in gaelic ??? 🥵 jesus.

episode 5 : it’s the tribble episode, so of course it’s a good episode. scotty’s absolutely haunted voice when he discovers the tribbles you know that man spent hours in engineering trying to get them off the engines. « tribbles in the ship, quadrotricitale in the corridors, klingons in the sector….it can ruin your day, sir ! » oh scotty my bud. i love that you’ve grown enough to take it one crazy-ass day at a time. they can’t really have the face expressions down but the voices are enough « we could still throw tribbles at them, sir. » « i thought vulcans didn’t have a sense of humour, mr spock » in That™️ voice. OH MY GOD THEY SENT THE TRIBBLES TO THE KLINGON SHIP AGAIN. koloth, in a really pained voice : « kirk…tribbles ? » jim, very grave, as if he just launched a nuclear bomb : « tribbles. ».

episode 6 : not another shapeshifter. i’m fucking tired of shapeshifters. ´hold on bones hasn’t been a bitch to you spock. there’s a big fucking problem then’. « you say i’m a man of curious habits, spock ? jim’s talking to a table. ». cat lady ? okay, i don’t know why i’m surprised. scotty gets attacked. « can you love this [tentacle alien], anne ? » clearly they haven’t heard about monsterfuckers. « will someone tell me what’s going on ? » me too scotty me too. « what manner of a beastie is that ? » ME TOO SCOTTY ME TOO. « if he had turned into a second spock, that would’ve been too much to take. » « but two mccoy, just might bring the level of medical efficiency on this ship up to acceptable levels » UNPROVOKED, SPOCK. UNCALLED FOR THAT LEVEL OF BITCHINESS.

episode 7 : sulu almost dying ???? thistle aliens ??? pterodactyls ??????? oh look, it’s an another self-proclaimed god fan of eugenics. FIVE METERS HIGH SPOCK ??? uhura, dear, scotty knows that he’s emptying the ship’s energy, he just doesn’t care anymore about what he’s gotta do to save these idiots. bamf sulu, we love to see it. what the fuck was that episode.

episode 8 : center of all creation ??? bones saying « jim ! what in the name of sanity is that ? » is on point. we outside time and space. omg life support is dead they're all dying. SATAN ??? spock turned into a child satyr and bones into a golden whirligig ??? THE ENTERPRISE EXPLODES ???? salem trial ??? ASMODEUS ??? aaand having a beer with satan. what the fuck was that

episode 9 : it the shore leave planet again ! and it's just bones uhura and sulu this time, and by god do they deserve a break. oh alice in wonderland again. and uhura singing, that's nice. oh- oh god. BONES PURSUED BY THE QUEEN OF HEARTS ??? the rotation bridge crew working their asses off to get them all back on board (hello cat lady). sentient computer causing mayhem again, how original. aw, bones worried for uhura.

SOMEBODY GET ME OUT OF HERE

NOT FUCKING PTERODACTYLS AGAIN PLEASE GOD LET ME GO. and a giant cat. what the fuck i'm so tired PLEASE. and a two-headed dragon, 'cause why the fuck not at this point. bones and sulu are gonna throw up from having to run for too long (i know the feeling). i think uhura just looked into the camera because she's just as tired of this bullshit as i am. also, the whole thing was just a misunderstanding with the sentient robot.

me : I’M TIRED OF THIS, GRANDPA

TAS : THAT’S TOO DAMN BAD ! *shows this*

episode 10 : the more i go into the series the more i wonder when will my suffering end. oh my god, mudd again ??? CHRISTINE DON’T LISTEN TO THAT PIECE OF SHIT. damn. dick really makes you do things huh. oh my god LEAVE SPOCK ALONE. HE’S GAY. nobody's believing their eyes and ears whenever spock talks about loving women it's fucking hilarious. scotty is getting pussy (literal) (the cat lady is all over him). and two rock godzillas ???

jesus christ spock

oh that’s the « now let’s talk about your heart my dear » by stoned-with-love-potion bones episode.

then it must be a fucking massive one scotty

when will i be free of follow-up episodes.

episode 11 : they all shrunk ??? because of some light ray ??? and then it’s just the lilliputians plot.

episode 12 : space bermudas triangle, okay. and klingons. scotty ready to fight them. then sulu passes out on bridge. ship taken in the weird ass triangle. no i don’t bother making sentences anymore, they don’t deserve it. i love how they don’t even seem surprised they’re in an alternate universe. spock being so excited about collaborating with klingons to punch their way out of the time-space continuum that he shows emotion it became weird. bones starting a brawl with the klingons because he just asked a klingon lady for a dance. they managed to punch their way through the continuum.

episode 13 : a kraken ???? SPOCK AND JIM KIDNAPPED BY THE KRAKEN ??? and now they’re sirens ??? and they meet the other merpeople. they almost die taking the antidote for the mutation. end of story.

episode 14 : special lgbt detachment (mission with just spock, uhura and sulu). that and they took warrior cats a bit too literally. there’s also a small reenactment of oppenheimer. they’re not even phased by that.

episode 15 : they beam down on planet and get attacked 0.7 seconds after. and bones gets crushed under a dinosaur’s ass. « spock, do you ever say anything straight out ? » YOU OF ALL PEOPLE SHOULD KNOW HE CAN’T, BONES. and stop bringing pterodactyls in, for the love of god.

only acceptable reaction :

episode 16 : super dangerous mission to retrieve a soul (???) and who do you send ? the senior commanding officers of course. NOT JIM SAYING "FASCINATING" WHEN THAT LADY - WHO JUST SAID SPOCK WAS UGLY - ASKED HOW HE FINDS HER. little moment of "i'm not leaving you and that's end of discussion" between jim and spock.

AND STOP IT WITH THE FUCKING PTERODACTYLS.

[that-one-weeb-but-it-transformer]

How they hide there identities + dating headcannons pt2

at request of a lovely reader here's part two

Optimus

last time we left off he had told you about being a giant robot and you were angry but glad he told you rather you figure it out

so like...now what? You just live with that secret till the day you die?

like...yeah pretty much

You're good with one human form robot man from another world, you don't need five more

"You...don't want to go meet them?" "Are you asking me out of curiosity? Or are you asking me because they're like family to you? Truth be told I think you in my life is one robot enough Orion-well should I say Optimus Prime" "You're not gonna let that go?" "Sweetheart its been a week give me time."

but he kept pestering you- well not pestering- it was like very sweet pestering, like a child trying to warm up to a new friend almost.

But you kept to your word, its one of the reasons he loves you so much, keeping to your word. You thought about it

"Just...do they really want to even have a human around." "We have five around usually." "oh...well shit I guess why not then, could have led with that a few days ago."

The next day you were going to ask him when you should come over and "meet the family" but he just disappered.

Not a word or a call

"Remember alien human robot...probally saving humanity...is there robot chicks? Is that a thing? No. No he wouldnt cheat...but I'd guess I'd understand if he wants to be with his own- okay I need to cook to get things off my mind."

Four days later he comes back, exhausted, and theres dishes everywhere.

"What happened-" "Orion? Is that you!?" "Uh. Yes dear-"

You hugged him so quickly, "I thought you were hurt." "Long mission is all...whats with all this food-" "I panic cook...wanna help me give some to the neighbors?"

He gladly helped you give the dishes away and then fell onto the couch

"Surpise?"

You saved his favorite dish. "Might be a bit cold."

"It's going to unfortunately stay that way."

He lays down with his head in your lap as your brush fingers through his hair, he's so exhausted

"So I was thinking....about your family." "Mhm..." "i'd like to visit them when you guys arent so busy."

Smokescreen

so last time you stormed out of the base and took the two-hour-long walk back to town- wonderful

He wants to apologize so bad but they made him stay in for the rest of the night

but bright and early he's waiting outside your house waiting for you to come out for school.

oh you come out, but as he walks up to you another guy out of nowhere does

"Aw, man did you see the UFC Fight last night n/n! I lost 50 bucks on that fight!" "I told you not to bet on him didn't I?"

You completely ignore him, and he's devastated

Not to mention this guy has a sporty car as well.

The last thing you need is to deal with a well you didn't know exactly what species smokescreen could be labeled under at the moment

but smokescreen waited on your steps the whole day for you to come home

and then you come home just to have an argument with you

so you left him out there to think about it and it was really hard for him because you trusted him so much during your relationship

but then, out of nowhere, Optimus picks you up

which is fine, because god damn you need to talk to someone that understands this

did he basically become your father in one talk in a way? Maybe.

so there you guys are walking through a forest

"I wanted to come and apologize for my teammates doing." "Oh. No. no need really!" "I also wanted to make sure you are alright, to hurt a human in any way is never our intention."

You guys had a super serious talk, you told him it's not about what smokescreen is or was or whatever, just the fact that he lied to you through like everything and you figured out like a brick wall in your face.

You really do miss smokescreen through, and probably scream into your pillow each passing day

probably broke more phone screen protectors than you can remember from looking at his number than throwing your phone

"I hate feelings!"

until you just do it, what do you have to lose anyway? certainly not your virginity (okay i need to chill with the jokes-)

Bro, he's at your door in a heartbeat, like he's been sleeping at your door.

Jack helped him buy you flowers.

"These are for you!" "are....are those tulips?" "uh...yeah! I think so! It's a bit hard to memorize all earth's- that's not the point." "Smokescreen I'm allergic to tulips,"

he swears he just wants to cry, already ruined his first chance

but you guys take the whole night talking things out, situating everything, he tells you all about him, and you fill in anything he didn't know about you

"Any major major things that might shock me?" "Not to big...but" "You said but that's never a good sign" "Yeah those Decepticons that you know...we're at war still...yeah...because you like... know us...they could go after you."

BRO, okay your calm your calm

"So what do I do?" "there's nothing you really can do except...have me on call which uh...you've probably had enough of me by now, sorry about that..."

You explain to him it'll take a few days to get your head wrapped around it and he's like okay, he's upset you enough

and you're slowly starting to text him again which, yay.

So even though it's like really slow, you guys kinda are poking at each other again

And you gave him a house key so...yay

and then you guys kissed again so YAY even if it was after a long time, he's just so glad to hold and kiss you again

he's also glad you let him into your bed to sleep (like actual sleep), he loves holding you

Bee

Last time he had come to apologize to you covered in mud and your chores done for the day and you let him knowing that both of you were okay as you let him shower and washed his chlothes

You let him borrow your bigger chlothes for now and you both sat on your bed

"So...your still mad?" "Oh absolutely." "Fair enough"

So you ask him more and more questions about him and his people, his planet

He answers all truthfully- you think and hope atleast

He tells you about everyone in his team and where he stands. As well as everyone there going against, who's bad who's good

"You ever feel like teetering?"

He's pretty shocked by that question

"No" "okay cool. Don't think Im suppose to date the villian anyways. Though the villian complex is compleling-" "I'll be a villian if you want!"

You have to stop him from making to rash of statements

"If you want the villian I'll be the villian!" "Bee! Please! I love you just the way you are!"

Wait- Love?

"You...love me?"

Oop

"Pfft...I mean......" "You might you love me!" "....maybe..."

How can you not love him, how can anyone not love him tbh

Magnus

you don't know if you're exactly bullying him, but feel like you do by well, doing almost anything

this man has so much anxiety about the two of you now it makes you feel really bad

like you can feel him stare at you longingly while you're "Asleep" like he's scared to touch you even.

"Magnus, I'm not gonna leave you. and if you want me to go meet your family, then I'll go meet them-" "No! I- mean. No. that's not needed."

you sometimes wonder if it's anxiety or stress. He told you about his place within the Autobots so you understand that he's kinda scared to lose such a high place, and lose all honor.

"if you get kicked out you can come live with me?" "Not helping." "Sorry."

You're even considering ending it, its not a healthy relationship for either of you, you went from seeing him every day to him being so scared in a way, that you've seen him stand outside the house from the window from coming back that he just leaves again

Turns out you'd both not be alright after all

"I think we should...well...not do this anymore." "Y/n-" "Don't think because I don't care about you. I do love you." "I don't understand-" "You will one day." "I-" "Magnus please leave."

Ah yes another heart breaking story

Crack out the cheap wine.

Here comes knockout to kidnap you on the way from the drug store.

Your so heartbroken by your own decision that your pretty much drinking as you're being kidnap

"Ugh! You're a cybertroian or whatever the hell your called!" "Yes-" "god your pretty but theres only one car for me! Hic! Actually! He's a truck! Hic! Can you believe it? I fucked an alien from another planet. God did he fuck so good!"

And here comes the tears, "But his hugs were the best and I broke it off so why am I crying!" A pause for another heavy drink, "It's been what? Almost 24 hours now!? Im such a wuss!"

Knockout finds you somewhat relatable yet annoying.

Your definitely his favorite prisioner.

You were still drunk when they came to save you, it was within a few hours after all.

"Ah! Magnus! I missed you so much! Do you know! If you don't eat while drinking, its like. Horrible for your stomach! Glad I ate that lunchable last night. Mhmm...what a good oreo cookie" "okay y/n we gotta go." "You know what!? You're leader can go fuck themselves! If they dont let you be in love with who you want they suck!" "Y/n. Have respect for Optimus-" "is that his name!? Fuck you Optimus! I love my dork! Mhm! He seems nice! You know besides the- hey...when did you get a new paint job. Purples not really your color..."

This is extremely embarssing

Luckily you passed out on his hand before anyone got to you, and then was asleep in his seats

You think you're doing bad?! He was doing even worse, he was basically wired the whole time, taking every task into his own hands, and was more cranky than usual. Wheeljack and him arguing more than usual

But Magnus took you home and it seems he wasnt the only one who through himself into work to try and combat, history books everywhere, artifacts, and your open laptop, you were most likely writing a report when you went drinking by the sight of two empty bottles of wine on the table.

"Mhmm...is that you mags?" "It's me Y/n." "I missed you." "I missed you too."

He gave you a nice warm bath and changed you into Pjs. You might have been black out drunk but you still held onto him tight in your sleep

That moring you woke up to the smell of eggs, and painful headache.

Then comes in your boyfriend- ex? We dont know okay

Magnus handed you a full scottish breakfast

"Is this black pudding!?" "Yes."

Your in love all over again, well you never fell off but still.

"Mhm how'd you know how to make this?" "I found one of your books. Who ever wrote that has impeccable handwriting." "My dad wrote that book. Its all of my moms and mes favorites." "I hope i did a good job." "Better than I remembered..."

Akward eye contact and flustered faces

"Im sorry If I hurt you." "No...Optimus and I talked about it. It made sense. Thank you. For caring." "Yeah...but if I cared so much I would of explained rather than...uh...rather than just run like that."

Fuck it you only live once, your both making out like nothing happen.

"Mhm- hey watch the breakfast." "Is is that much better than me-"

Oh no. Dont bite into the black pudding, and he's gaging.

[kythed]

“pillow talk” - a collection of conversations between you and matsukawa issei.

1. october 23rd, 1:03am.

“that was fun.” matsukawa props himself up on one elbow, lower half still covered by a disarray of blue dorm sheets.

you’re sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling your t-shirt back on, but you turn to look at him, smiling slightly. “fun?” 

“great. excellent. out of this world amazing,” he says teasingly. there’s a glint in his eye and a flush in his cheeks. 

“that’s what I thought.” you make to stand up, but matsukawa grabs your wrist before you can move another muscle. 

“you can stay,” he says, face strangely hopeful and childlike (a sharp contrast to the night’s earlier… activities). “if you want, I mean.” 

your body aches to climb back under the covers with him, to press yourself against his hot skin and let yourself fall asleep in his embrace… but what you have with matsukawa is new and fragile, and you refuse to close your fist on something delicate and shatter it in the process. 

“maybe next time. I have class in the morning.” advanced calculus, to be specific. hell on earth, to be even more specific. 

“will there be a next time?” there it is again. that hope. 

“if you’ll have me,” you say, rising from the mattress.

“I’ll do more than have you.” he grins, cocking his head. “I’ll take you.” 

and there it is — matsukawa issei, ladies and gents. you smile to yourself as you slip out of his room, committing the feel of his hands gripping your hips and his lips on yours to memory. 

2. october 27th, 4:36pm. 

you stay this time. it’s a weeknight, and there’s class in the morning again, but the bed is warm and matsukawa’s arm fits like it was made for you. he’s nervous, you can tell, what with the way his fingers shake slightly as they brush the hair from your eyes — but that’s okay. it’s endearing. cute, even. 

“hey,” he says, voice low and throaty. 

“hi,” you respond, turning your face to look at him, his sharp, angular face shaded even more dramatic by moonlight. he really is a little too pretty for his own good, you decide, running a light hand down his torso. his mouth twitches when your fingers skim over his waistband and back up again. 

“tease,” he sighs, and you laugh. 

“it’s what I’m best at,” you say. 

“among other things,” matsukawa concedes, grinning. you gasp and hit him lightly on the chest.

“you’re so dirty minded!” you scold, and he scoffs. 

“I’m the dirty minded one? listen sweetheart, twenty minutes ago you were —” 

you shut him up with a swift kiss on the lips, swallowing his indignant words as he chuckles somewhere in the back of his throat and pulls you on top of him. you slide your fingers into his mess of dark hair and smile into the kiss until he finally breaks away and begins dusting smaller kisses along your jaw and collarbone. 

“you know,” you breathe, trying to avoid gasping when matsukawa presses his mouth to that soft spot right below your neck, “you’re acting awfully boyfriend today, issei. you’d better be careful before I up and decide to make you mine.”

“maybe that’s what I want you do to,” he says without looking at you. 

you start in surprise, a small smile creeping onto your lips. “oh, really?” 

matsukawa unattaches himself from your neck and takes your face in his hands, staring up at you with a grin. “really.” 

“okay,” you say, and in response he squishes your cheeks and laughs. you roll your eyes and tug on his wrists until he lets go. “okay, boyfriend.”

“okay, girlfriend.” 

you’d never anticipated a relationship to fall into place so easily. but then again, with matsukawa, everything — everything from his sweet talk to his skin to his stupid pickup lines — is pretty damn smooth.

3. january 1st, 11:24pm.

“you have a nice nose,” he says, running a finger down its bridge. golden afternoon light slices through the gaps in his shutters, casting odd stripes across his face.

“I hate my nose.” you bite back a sheepish smile. “it’s weird.”

“no, it’s cute,” he insists, and despite yourself, your heart swells. maybe it’s silly, maybe it’s shallow, but nothing really beats having someone refute your insecurities, however insignificant they may be. “I’m the one with a weird nose.”

you sit straight up, nearly knocking him back. “you do not have a weird nose. I love your nose!” 

“I love your face.” matsukawa gently pulls you back down, gathering you into his chest so he can rest his chin on your shoulder. 

“well, it is a pretty nice face,” you say, and he huffs.

“you were supposed to say you love my face, too,” he whines in a small voice. you almost giggle at the thought of this six foot two giant baby-talking to you.

“I thought that was self-explanatory,” you say. “I like everything about you.”

matsukawa shoots you a dramatic glare, furrowing his brows. “yesterday you said you didn’t like my t-shirt.”

“it was a rick and morty t-shirt! I was morally obligated to disparage your fashion taste in that moment,” you say piously. 

“so you don’t like everything about me,” matsukawa sighs, pretending to wipe a tear from his eye. “my girlfriend is a liar.” 

“I like everything about you except for the fact that you like rick and morty,” you correct yourself. 

“I like everything about you except for the fact that you don’t like rick and morty,” matsukawa shoots back, and you let out an ugly guffaw. 

“alright, then. agree to disagree?”

before answering, he leans forward to give you a brief kiss that you return, enjoying the faint taste of spearmint on his lips. “you’ll come around eventually.” 

“I really won’t.”

“you will.”

“I won’t.”

“you won’t.”

“I will,” you say, and then — “wait, no. damn it, issei, I can’t believe that worked on me.”

“gotcha!” 

4. march 20th, 3:16am. 

“dude,” matsukawa says. “we should go out for ramen.”

“did you just call me dude?” you raise an incredulous eyebrow. 

“sorry,” he says, sitting upright and pulling on a shirt. “I meant babe. can we get ramen?”

“it’s 3am,” you say, catching the shirt he tosses to you and putting it on. “is there any place nearby that’s still open at this hour?” 

matsukawa whisks you out of bed, bridal style, and spins you around, ignoring your protestations as you attempt to scold him between giggles. when he finally sets you down you’re dizzy, clinging to him for balance. “obviously you don’t understand the ramen business. when the craving hits, it hits, and these guys know that. that’s why there’s a 24 hour ramen-ya near every college campus in the country.” 

“then,” you say, blinking hard as the room comes back into focus. “I say we go eat.” 

“let zem eat ramen?” matsukawa says in a phony french accent. you want to roll your eyes but you can’t quite bring yourself to do so. he’s too damn charming about it. 

“let zem eat ramen,” you repeat, and he laughs, rumpling your hair before grabbing his keys off the bedside table. 

“you’re adorable.”

“I’m a legal adult,” you sigh. “why do you insist on calling me cute? I’m sexy.”

“you’re cute and sexy,” he agrees, opening the door for you. “the two are not mutually exclusive.” 

“fancy words.”

“I’m just trying to impress you,” he says with an obnoxious wink. 

5. april 4th, 1:58am. 

“do you think there’s life in space?” 

you’re lying side by side next to matsukawa, both staring up at his dorm room ceiling, where a handful of plastic stars glow in the dark. 

he snickers. “you mean, like, martians? little green men with antennae?”

“sure,” you say, ignoring his jab. “or maybe enormous space whales swimming somewhere deep in the cosmos. galactic empires of cyborgs and robot servants. train stations that take you from star to star.” 

“that reminds me,” he says. you feel him slip his fingers into your hand. “we should watch star wars together sometime.” 

“you avoided the question,” you complain, and he laughs. 

“sorry,” he says. “I’ve never given much thought to huge space whales or interplanetary train stations.”

“you’ve never wondered might be out there? never wanted to fly to the moon and see what there is to see?” the thought is alien (pun intended) to you. how could anyone look into the star speckled sky and see anything other than a mass of worlds waiting to be explored? 

“I don’t need to. kinda have everything I could ever want here on earth already.” matsukawa shrugs, flashing you a grin. “good friends. perfect girlfriend. a really excellent ramen shop down the street.” 

“and that’s all you need?”

“that’s all I need,” he agrees, and you stay silent, scooting closer to press yourself into matsukawa’s larger frame. maybe he has a point. you count over your blessings in your head: good friends, perfect boyfriend, a really excellent ramen shop down the street. even space whales can’t really compare, you decide, sneaking a glance at issei only to find he’s already looking down at you with a soft smile. 

and maybe that’s enough. maybe it’s enough to have someone who loves you and your flaws, someone who lets you borrow his dumb graphic tees and never lets you pay for your own dinner. maybe what you have here with matsukawa issei, feet on the ground and hands intertwined, is enough.

[marinaiguess]

SONIC FRONTIERS TRAILER ANALYSIS + SPOILERS (I mean, what did you expect)

this trailer was all I was hoping for. I had high expectations for the next mainline sonic game and until now, sonic frontiers hasn't disappointed me. so, here's why I'm so hyped

the animations and the graphics look absolutely gorgeous, my boy finally has expressions!! (I know it's cgi but still)

all the different starfall islands + the cyberspace levels look very interesting and fun and beautiful

sage's: "submit" and sonic's: "fuck u bitch, I'm going anyway" yeah I loved that (he actually doesn't say anything but his face says it)

he goes so fast lol, this goes out to the ones who would complain about Sonic's lack of speed in this game

all the new gimmicks look fun, the bouncing off the walls, the new fighting techniques

oh don't get me started on these robots, they are unique and they look pretty challenging so I'm excited about that

the suspense is real, we see a locked up Amy, I wonder how sonic will save her and tails and knuckles (apparently they all lost their memories)

THE GODDAMN VOICE ACTING. honestly, I never found Roger's voice fitting for sonic. I always have respected his work however, don't get me wrong. but the delivery of that single line... PERFECT. I hope it's the same for the rest of the game, I've been dying for some good voice acting/good voice direction and good writing

speaking of good writing, as soon as I learned Ian Flynn is the writer for the frontiers' story, I was relieved and until now his work on the game has been proven to be damn good

idk what sage's powers are (atp I'm just assuming her name is sage) but wtf did she do to sonic, his arm went red and one could say his arm went null space (that red just reminds me of the phantom ruby and infinite's power, okay?)

wait, did his arm glitch? did sage glitch? bcuz I know for a fact that the cyberspace levels have some glitchy effects here and there. (sage is the glitch confirmed and if you know, you know)

oh I can see the pain in Sonic's face! and his anger! he has emotions! (lol)

she summoned a giant anthropomorphic robot vulture, almost 19 times bigger than sonic (maths), that's great :')

also, 60€? it seems fair but I ain't buying it for a little while it seems oops

I wasn't expecting that cover but I'm not complaining, it's pretty cool

the soundtrack? gorgeous. (judging by what we've heard) but it's a sonic game, ofc it will have a banger ost

also, it's a lot different than that Japanese trailer we saw a few days ago (which looked so pretty), I'm just saying

go visit the official website for sonic frontiers, there are some nice screenshots y'all should check out :)

and with that being said, I hope I can get this game sooner or later, I'm so hyped.