#cygars and rust

[ask-a-bot]

... This first question is very specific. Why do you want to know? I believe spark merging enables to bots to share thoughts, emotions and sensations with one another. Even dreams. I... I would like to try it. One day. Perhaps.

My apologies, Sir. It was a strange question. I have recently spark merged with someone and I feel... strange. My spark itches? And I keep getting intrusive thoughts and sensations. Just wondered if it was a side-effect and it sounds like it is. We decided to without learning about it first or anything. Does this mean it's as binding as a conjunx ritus?

Thank you. I feel very much better.

I'm glad you're feeling better!

Thanks for the welcome back! I, Starscream, am very happy to be home. Bumblebee and Kup have gone off again though.

I hope you feel more at home now. Shame that Bumblebee couldn't stick around.

Anyway, take care! I've sent rust sticks, cobolt glazed bolts and cygars for Kup. Hope you all like them!

⚡️

I have not spark merged with anyone. I have heard that it makes us vulnerable – during the war, an enemy could have tortured or even killed someone by capturing and then hurting the one whom they merged their spark with. Stupidly dangerous thing to do during a war. Never make yourself vulnerable to your enemies.

As to your question, try consulting with a medic that specialises in the spark.

Thank you. Could you persuade Starscream to stop making such a fuss?

I'm delighted to be home! Thank you for the sweeties!

The, uh... goodies... were much appreciated! Thank you for sending them.

[witchofthesouls]

This was a weird crossover thought, but hey, it’s a rare pair:

Grandmama Frump has no idea how, what, when, and where the ancient grimoire had dumped her, nor the spellwork that pushed her into a metal body, but the entrails did say she will be on quite a transformative journey. Meets up with the DJD by intercepting on their List. Not her fault if the mechs were stupid enough to bother her and joins them after admiring their skills. Grandmama Frump and Vos would get along like fire on a gasoline-soaked body.

She can fully appreciate a being that can fully transform into a sniper rifle. Granny Frump prefers to go down and bloody close to the target, so she tries to convince him to get a bayonet attachment.

Nothing says romance than a personal stab, together.

Just as nothing says “I love you” so much to an Addams than causing chaos, mayhem, and murder with a partner, especially if they could literally use their partner. How intimate…

Vos and Grandmama would croon sweet nothings full of murderous intentions to each other. Unfortunately, they do all the time, especially during meals.

No one understands what the hell they’re saying since they’re speaking in the respective dead language of Primal Vernacular and Ancient French. Except for Tarn… and he’s dying from the horniness.

The leader of the DJD feels beyond uncomfortable, but Tarn can’t turn away when Granny climbs into Vos’ lap, face to face as she steadies herself with his shoulders. The romantic locked deep in his untouched spark practically swoons as Granny tenderly cradles Vos’ mask and simultaneously recoils from what Vos purrs back.

There are some things a mech is not meant to know. Please stop playing with the ruffles and seams of her armor.

Actually, everyone is dying from the horniness. They may not understand, but even the blind mech could feel that raw tension.

There’s many strange sounds in Vos' habsuite. It’s screaming. A lot of screaming. Not of terror. Sometimes agony, but it’s mixed with pleasure. With laughter. High and demented that leaves scratches over a brain module, like rusted nails shoved deep into a helm.

Once it stops, the door opens to dreamy Frump swaying to invisible music as she heads to the shower rack.

The way she moves is reminiscent to the artistic bodily freedom of the Golden Age music underground and the famed courtesans of the High Towers and Primal Palace: strangely sensual and oddly provocative in its fluid grace of free-form steps and twirls. The armor she uses doesn’t help, it sways to her movement.

Vos, in berth and completely enraptured, watches on, smoking a cygar.

Tarn and Kaon gives him hell for it since the ship has designated smoking areas and the communication officer hates the smell leaking to his hab.

Grandmama had commandeered the kitchen and refuses to let anyone else into it. Not even if it causes the fire alarms and toxicity sensors to blare. She has it well in hand, sonny! There are at least three cauldrons always on the flames from a sweet simmer to furiously frothing to the point the lid will become a deadly projectile. The smell can be absolutely delightful or completely atrocious -far, far worse than Tesarus not properly deep-cleaning his most inward blades.

Tarn has no idea if Granny Frump is trying to kill them by an obvious poisoning attempt since whatever she heaved over to the shared table is... ghastly vibrant with a sludge-like consistency. And possibly in its dying throes as she smacks the cauldron insides with a spiked ladle. And he’s absolutely not imagining that muted shriek-

Between Nickel’s medical programs, Tesarus’ ununtrium-coated tank, and Helex’s ability to heat his own internals to a deadly scorch to kill everything, they can take on whatever malice she wields.

Luckily, there’s the usual Energon dispenser in the mess hall, but Tarn can only watch in mute horror as everyone else eats it, even the Pet enjoys it.

Helex and Tesarus wolf down over half the cauldron with large doses of aluminum flakes and cobalt swirls. Kaon eventually switches to the dispenser, but only because the smell overrides the lovely taste. Vos eats his extra blended portion with a straw. Even Nickel is in on it: sipping on her bowl with a side of boron biscuits.

He is not the weird one. He is not-

[x-de-con-struct-ed-x--arch]

@cygars-and-rust - [ cont. ]

Kup was just standing and looking out about the base almost like he was silently judging it.

But then he was captured in bulky black armored arms, which he gave a grunt to. “Where the hell have you been.. Haven’t seen you for a few cycles-” his tone sounded flat with out any effort to outwardly express himself,

Ironhide hums, concern coloring his field as his grip tightens on the other mech. “Helmache,” he admits, tone guilty. “One of my really bad ones. I just needed to rest for a while.” He nuzzles against Kup’s neck, letting out a soft exvent. “’m sorry.” Resetting his optics, Ironhide frowns. “You alright, othandey?”

[roddiesboi-blog]

Kups just gonna raise a brow, "shouldn't you be with hotrod-" -cygars-and-rust

“Hi Kup! Shouldn’t you be with Grimlock?”

[wreckerforeman]

Fling!

@cygars-and-rust

Roadbuster grinned wide at seeing the new mech on earth, and he had not been spotted yet. He looked over at his taller mate, then grinned even wider to show fangs. Yes he was Foreman, but really, was not often did he get to be playful.

A quick comm. to his mechling had Hoteod rolling over, the minibot not bothered by being picked up.

"Hey old gear!" Roadbuster finnally yelled, and either shamelessly tossed his mechling at Kup, "remember this? He got bigger!"

[b0ss-b0t]

@cygars-and-rust​ X

“It’s quite a story, I-” he didn’t have time to reply before the older bot had him in a tight hug, causing him to wheeze a little.

“Y-yes, Kup, I’ve missed you too!” he managed to squeeze out from his voice box, patting the green bot on the back.

[rungalwaysheretolisten]

Kup walked over wrapping his arms around Rung, and yelled "SUPRISE!"

Rung is taken back by the arms wrap anound him, when he saw it was Kup Rung giggled and kiss him.

“Oh what a wonderful surprise this is what do I owe the honor of suck a surprise as this?” 

[sunshinedbells]

@cygars-and-rust

This level of the recovory base was quiet, well, quiet ish. It was not the brand new level that was dug out so there was still cybertornian and some human voices around. More so if one listened for them, the casual conversations of how mecha were doing, improvements for the area and the excitement over the new oil baths. 

It was a fairly normal day and shift, everyone new to earth had been checked in. The new arrives were giving the chance to adapt now (if not just recover in some cases) get used to humans as well in a safer place that was not a military base. Not all Auobots were needed right away.now.

One tiny form was walking down the massive halls, expertly sticking to one side side so not the be in the way. Everything down here was scaled up to be on a Cybertronian level, with a few smaller adaptions such as catwalks or spaces carved into the rock and crystal sides. Letting the few trusted humans and Mechs could interact. It was mostly the families of the NEST men and woman that lived above as a pretty convincing cover. But, where there was no catwalks tucked out of the way, the humans and, and Cybertronians, had learned a few tricks, one was that the smaller you are, you stuck to the sides of the halls, and the bigger you are, you stuck to the middle of the wide halls.

That’s what Annabelle was doing, it kept her safe just in case some mech wasn’t paying attention, but also to peek into any rooms. She was on a mission, there were several new mechs here! and she had been given permission to visit if they were okay with it. So the girl was pulling her wagon with her, it had some energon goodies Sideswipe helped with making- though she painted them!

Annabelle was half way across an open door before realizing that someone was in the darkened room. She squeaked, startled. “Sorry!.....hi?”

[youngratchet]

"Rattyrattyrattyrattyratty!" Hugs -cygars-and-rust

*insert neverending sigh of longsuffering* 

[despicableruler]

Just as the seeker went to stand, slipping off the chair in front of his bedroom window, he felt a great lurch within his middle, something harsh that tore up against his spine, making him gasp for air and grab out onto the counter beside the door. For a moment, he thought perhaps the baby had just kicked him really hard, and wrote it off, slow to open the door leading out into the weather worn house of Kup’s.

That is, until he felt something wet beneath his bare feet. He peeked down, and grabbed at the wall. 

“D--Dad?” he called, voice rather quiet. “I think I peed myself-”

[occasional-peace]

@cygars-and-rust

“You don’t have to, but I will not argue,” he replies with a smirk as he follows Kup.

[dxdlck]

@cygars-and-rust   xxxx

.

“Dont be stupid.” Kup used his fists cracking his fists against helms shattering a few optics and visors. “Wrecker..” he corrected rather quickly,

The old mech glared. “Shut up and sit down. Let me have a look at those.” He forced Deadlock onto his aft. He wasnt going to take slag from a newbuild little less one mouthing him.

Kup pulled a medi-kit and hed up a chunk of metal “Bite down hard and try not to be too loud. Dont need any more of your so called friends coming for a visit.” He took out a servo welder stuffing some sealant in the hole to stop the bleeding then started patching pieces where energon leaked.

“Remember you hit me you’ll be asleep for the next week kid.” He shifted his cy-gar from one corner of his mouth to the other,

.

This was embarassing. First having an Autobot come to his ‘rescue’ and now this mech was trying to repair. He had his own medics to go to for that, not some fragging ‘bot.

“I don’t need to bite down on some slag,” he snapped. 

Deadlock would rather throw the piece back and the old mech, but he threw it off to the side instead, mumbling something under his breath as he reluctantly let him finish. He could forget this entire thing before the next cycle, and if anyone bothered to ask, he did just fine on his own. 

“Think I’d happily take the risk.”

[iignitedspark]

@cygars-and-rust​    xxxx

.

Kup snarled but as soon as the mech got close he froze. He clenched his fist then swung it knocking the hunting mech in the jaw. Kup gasped and held his servo. “Frag!”

The old mech held his servo winching.. the hell was this guy made of?

.

   The mech stumbled, holding the lower half of his jaw as he glared. Despite the scuffs made and the now dull ache that caused, he was still smiling. It’s not a moment later that he’s lunging again, trapping his prey between the wall and himself. 

   He snaps and licks his maw, hovering in anticipation as well as eagerness. He was ready to sink his denta into the mech’s neck from the moment he laid optics on him. 

[x-de-con-struct-ed-x--arch]

@cygars-and-rust - [ cont. ]

Kups just covered in snow, hes on his aft his arms stucking up out in the air,.

Ironhide help

Ironhide hits his breaks and fishtails around, hard enough to send him rolling over the ice. He simply uses the momentum to transform, ending up on his pedes only a few places away from the other mech with a wild grin on his faceplates and a hearty laugh rumbling through his frame.

Giving the plow attachment - now folded into a neat shield against his left forearm - a quick glance-over, he approaches the teal-limbed snow pile, resting his servos on his hips. "Need a little help there, sweetspark?"

[petitelepus]

How about number 74 with Kup? Hopefully, this won't be too weird. Lol

You sighed out loud as you watched from across the bar how Kup told one of his old war stories to those who were willing to listen and get lost in the action of his stories.

You were maybe a newbie but unlike other recruits who thought Kup should retire and spend the rest of his days smoking his cygar, you wanted nothing more than to impress him and earn his respect.

"Still ogling at old Kup?"

You turned to look at Blurr who was cleaning a cube of engex and you nodded lightly. "He is just so...! So...!"

"Old?"

"Hot-! No, handsome!" You blushed and the former blue Wrecker chuckled, "You must be only one who has their optics on Kup. Many would prefer younger mechs whose joints aren't covered in rust."

"Gasp! Take that back!"

"Seriously, what is it that you like about him?"

"It's just..." You sighed, "He is so interesting, experienced, and good looking and that cygar looks so good between his denta."

Blurr doesn't reply, but he can tell you really have fallen for your drill sergeant. The way you sighed longingly as you looked at him with hearts in your optics told the former Wrecker that your feelings were genuine.

"You know, they say Kup used to be a real turbo hound back in the days," Blurr said and you turned to look at your predecessor Wrecker.

"You think I may have a shot with my superior if I point out that he had a lot of flings in his youth?" You were filled with disbelief but Blurr just smiled and nodded, "It's worth a try, isn't it?"

He was right, it was. You glanced at Kup one more time and you made your mind. You were going to seduce your drill sergeant. You quickly downed your drink and wiped your lips clean.

"Wish me luck." You said as you got up and approached the millennial mech. Despite being engaged in another war story, Kup noticed you coming and greeted you. "Hey there sport! Come to hear about the time I took out 5 Decepticons with one shot?"

"Sir, I would like to request a private conversation with you." You said and you thanked Primus you didn't stutter. Kup stared at you for a second before he nodded and looked at the young mechs around him. "You heard it, scram!"

Young mechs laughed as they went to fill their pints, leaving you alone with your superior. Kup smiled and pulled a chair for you. "What's troubling you, soldier?"

"I..." You swallowed nervously, "I heard that you sir used to be a turbo hound back in the days." You said and Kup laughed around his cygar. "Those were the days. Why the sudden interest?"

You blushed, "I- I was just curious."

"I doubt you came to me just to hear about my old love life that happened millennia ago." He said as he fixed his hold on his cygar.

You swallowed nervously and nodded. "No, sir... I, I came to you because..."

"Because?"

"I... I would like to experience it first hand." You confessed and blushed immediately. Oh Primus, you really said it! You said indirectly that you want to sleep with your sergeant!

Kup stared at you and you felt your courage dying. Finally, he took the cygar out of his mouth and grinned at you.

"Experience what? You have to be clearer than that."

Oh no, now he was just teasing you! The energon burned your cheeks and your optics wouldn't focus properly. Oh, Primus, you would never be able to show your face around him anymore!

"F- Forget it, forget what I said!" You blurted and turned to leave in panic, but suddenly Kup grabbed your hand and yanked you back to him. You yelped as you lost your footing and fell straight to his lap.

"I'm just pulling your leg soldier!" Kup laughed and as embarrassed as you were, you loved the sound of his laughter.

"I would be honored to spend a night with a gorgeous bot like you." He said and you felt your Spark nearly burn through your chassis. Kup grinned, "Just know that I won't be favoring you over others."

You swallowed and nodded, "I wouldn't expect anything else but just so you know, sir... My feelings aren't purely carnal." You confessed and Kup looked at you long and hard... until he smiled and you felt your Spark burn harder at his handsome smile.

"I know." He confessed back and you couldn't take it anymore. You grabbed his cygar and helm between your hands and kissed him with everything you got.

If Kup was surprised, he didn't let it show. No, he kissed you right back and you moaned against his mouth. When the two of you finally pulled apart, there was cheering coming from every direction.

Every bot in the bar cheered at you two and you felt embarrassed, but Kup just grinned. "My place is near."

"Mine is closer." You said and Kup grinned as the two of you got up from your seat and made your way to the bar's entrance, "Lead the way."

[thenamesblurrito]

More food posts: first, second, third

Screenshot the ask so the image quality isn’t ruined (why does tungle do that to pictures under asks anyway), but yes! There’s multiple things that fall under that definition.

Rust does actually have its uses! A rust infection is detrimental, of course, but when ingested it can be repurposed by a mech’s self repair systems as a polishing agent, and can also be used as an ingredient for minor thermite welding on more drastic interior wounds or breaks.

1) actual, literal junk food, the thing most people in-universe are talking about when they say junk food. The average junker spends half the day, if not more, just looking for food. Stealing is an option, but risky, since Enforcers are often looking for any excuse to arrest and harass homeless outcasts like them. So their usual food source is the trash. Not a lot of it will be even close to fuel, but a junker has to have impervious tanks to survive. Their immune systems and internal forges are often stronger than a regular mech because they’re used to living off barely edible material. Fresh energon is also unheard of, so they get the used runoff, mostly industrial-grade sludge that wouldn’t be appetizing even brand new.

2) as for the “not healthy but tastes nice” type of junk food, that would be anything that’s overenergized, like a nice cool glass of buzzing energade. Consuming excess materials will just lead to denser or lumpier armor and increased shedding, and consuming excess energy will lead to essentially a sugar high and resulting crash. Energade like this is charged up to maximum capacity, so a tired mech will be refreshed quickly and a rested mech will find themselves needing to burn off energy. Repeatedly consuming high charged fuel stresses the internal power routing systems of a frame and can lead to the equivalent of tripped breakers and fried circuits, usually on a very minor scale.

3) cygars exist, why not chewing tobacco? Copper cud is oxidized ore in soft convenient chunks for a mech to chew on for awhile. The metal itself is mostly copper, with a second material hammered and stretched and folded back on itself within the copper until the two are marbled together without having been melted into an alloy. Each plug has a coating of sweetener oil. The gummy versions sometimes come with a small battery in the rubber to charge the wire wrapping while chewing. They’re useful for quitting harder stimms and circuitjacks, or as just something to occupy the mouth as a habit.