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80s4life · 1 year ago

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Together At Last”

Word Count: 3,971

Status: Requested!

Ask: Can I have Chris Chambers x reader with the prompt "You're different and I like that"

@: @micheleamidalajedi

A/N: I absolutely LOVED this request because I was able to put myself into the Reader and prove that not everyone is the same, female, male, or nonbinary, or all of the girlypops!

Relationship: Chris Chambers x Merrill!Reader

Fandom: Stand By Me 1986

Summary: It’s been 5 years since the disappearance and eventual death of Ray Brower, and you’re each reaching graduation. However, another adventure arises and brings all 5 of you back to the woods to find Teddy’s dog. The problem? Almost all of you have either grown apart or split completely, and old feelings seem to resurface with unresolved conclusions. What could go wrong?

Warnings: mutual pining, adventure, confessions, AGED UP!, friends to enemies to lovers, some angst, nostalgia, lost friendships, gained friendships, Teddy is a brother figure to Reader, gun, unintentional intent to kill someone, strong language, Reader is Ace Merrill’s sibling,

{gif is not mine, credits go to @awidevastdominion}

Your landline rings, deriving you of your thoughts and current intensity studying for finals. Groaning, you shrug out of your seat at the kitchen table begrudgingly, answering the phone. “Hello?”

“Y/N? ‘S that you?” a familiar voice, deepened with maturity and hormones asks on the other side.

“Yeah, what do you want?”

“Nice to know you haven’t changed,” you can hear the voice taunt annoyingly.

“It’s been years since I’ve talked to you, did you expect a ‘Hey, what’s up’?”

“I would have preferred that, yes, but no. This is serious, and I really need you on board with me this time.”

“This better not be one of your schemes, Teddy, I’m not up for anything right now,” you sigh, “I’m up to my neck with textbooks and shit with studying for the finals and stuff. Dad’s been on my ass about getting into a college since I’ve been able to hold a B+ to A average.”

“Damn. Sorry to say I can’t relate?”

You giggle, sighing as you’ve missed him. You couldn’t quite tell what happened to cause you to separate, but as if you had just blinked, everyone was gone and you were left to yourself and school. “Alright Teddy, what bullshit are we pulling now?”

“Glad you asked!” he all but yells in happiness, “My dog went missing a few days ago and I haven’t been able to find him all over town. I know this sounds childish, but I swear, I’ve walked the whole town everyday at dawn before school and haven’t been able to find him.”

“So, you’re guessing he’s in the woods?” you groan, remembering the haunting history you’ve witnessed first hand in said territory.

There’s a long pause before he lets out a low, “...Yes...”

“What did the others say?”

“What makes you think I asked them?” he tries to sound as if he’s not that easy to read; a “changed man.”

“Because I still know you, or some of you. There’s no way this is going to be a one night thing and we need more sets of dependable eyes.”

“Well, now you’re making me sound smart.”

You giggle, “I’m not gonna keep beating around the bush Teddy, I’m in as long as the others are?”

“Yes!” he shrieks.

...

A few days later, as instructed by Teddy, you carry your sleeping bag, flask of water, some snacks, and money (something you all collectively forgot last time) to the dumpsters behind the town’s cafe. Trudging around the corner, your breath catches in your throat as you lay eyes on the back of three familiar heads and a face, each people you thought you have grown so far apart from.

“Y/N!” the voice of the face coming from Teddy.

You nod silently, leaning against the brick building as you keep your distance.

The three boys that are now men, turn around to take you in, eyes wide.

You wave nervously, age and distance having changed all of you and making you feel as if you don’t know these people.

Teddy still had his familiar square-shaped, black glasses, but his hair is cut to fit the army’s conduct, shaved short on the sides around the back, the top of his head a bit longer. There was just enough hair for Teddy to comb it back with gel just as he had as a preteen - before you all turned away to seek your own lives. He grew a bit taller, standing at 5′5″, but not by much. You giggle internally.

To the far left, you see Gordie and your heart breaks a little. He’s still lean in build, but he’s grown to be tall and confident, around 5′11″ - 6′0.” To you, he hasn’t changed a bit, except personality. He still had his longer hair, possibly longer than you remember it, with the same hairstyle and familiar baby face, though slightly aged.

Next was Vern, and he was so big now. He managed to drop the weight, a lean build of muscle standing above 6′0″ and carrying his dopey grin with longer hair - a similar style to Gordie’s, though unintentionally. You smile at him. He’s still a sweetheart, but more like a big, lovable Chocolate Lab now.

Lastly was Chris, and he was still as gorgeous as ever. He came to be of above average height, 5′10,″ grew his hair out longer and adorned circular glasses that framed his face perfectly. His eyes carry no emotion, a contrast to his younger self, but they’re still that luscious deep blue. He looks you up and down in silence before staring you directly in your eyes. You can feel your heart break all over again.

You didn’t realize how long you were staring at each of them before Teddy clears his throat. “Shall we?” he tries to smirk, but the tension is thick.

You hug your arms around your abdomen as you nod, plastering a smile of your face as you force yourself to stand beside the now men. Slowly, everyone starts to follow Teddy until you reach the tracks.

Some time later, as you walked on the tracks, you lagged behind. Now, with this view, you could see where everyone had changed, but not as much as you thought. Gordie and Chris got to talking amongst themselves far in front of the group, Teddy and Vern behind them. They’re all too busy catching up for them to notice your inner turmoil.

You almost want to cry. You don’t know any of them anymore. This was a fact that your younger self would’ve never expected or taken a liking to. You think of what your younger self would do, punishing yourself for what you allowed to happen.

You would’ve called them repeatedly, tried to make plans or catch up to them in passing to classes. All of this you could pride yourself on saying that you did, but then Gordie went the way his father wanted him to go, Chris becoming an athlete while trying to follow Gordie’s brains, getting into law, Teddy trying to apply and reapply to the military, and Vern taking a liking in the construction trade.

They all grew up, and though you couldn’t blame them, they slipped out of your hands far too quickly and suffered the backlash. Girls in school are bitches, and though you have friends, they aren’t like the ones before you. Even after all this time, they are still considered exactly that - friends, family even.

You went your own way, too, after giving up on them. You found an interest in engineering and found that it’s not exactly as you suspected. It wasn’t all math and physics and you deeply enjoyed the creativity and problem-solving it included. You have some fond classmates there, but they would never compare to these boys.

You are ripped from your thoughts as you hear the loud blaring of a train’s horn. You smirk at the memory that crosses. Calling out to Teddy, your voice is loud enough for all of the boys to hear, “Sound familiar, Teddy? We’re not gonna go diving for you on the tracks again, right?”

“Fuck off,” you can hear him giggle, jabbing Vern in the side.

All the way in the front, you can hear Gordie add, “Or have to break you and Chris up, huh?”

You giggle at the reminder. That was the time when you were all trying to figure yourselves out without guidance, restrictions, stereotypes, and parents. Teddy had a lot of trouble then.

Your smile drops as the group goes quiet again, the nostalgia dying with the connection that almost rekindled. You groan audibly - unintentionally.

The boys look back at you curiously, surprised just as much as you were.

You decide to take the initiative, “Is this what we’re going to do the whole time? Act as if we’re strangers and not speak to one another?”

“We are strangers, Y/N,” you hear Chris state with indifference.

You catch up to the group and walk between them, “There’s a reason we all came here and I know we all hoped to be together again. It doesn’t help when you don’t even try to speak to us though, does it?”

The group stops as Chris spins around on you. “Why would I? After this, we are all gonna go our separate ways and avoid each other again,” he growls and spits, “Just like last time.”

“Then, why did you come?” you ask, your curiosity getting the better of you and asking the question you were all wondering yourselves. “Why are we all here?” you look around at each of them.

“Because I missed you guys,” Vern pipes up, the first words he’s spoken the whole walk from town.

“We wouldn’t have missed each other if we had just kept our promises, would we?” Chris asks, frowning with his eyebrows scrunched together and arms crossed tightly over his chest. It almost resembles hatred.

And it makes you livid. “You broke your promise, too, Chris,” you vividly remember the promise you made just short of town on your way back; the promise that meant the world and more to you - it still does. “We all did, but at least I can say it wasn’t intentional. I tried to reach out to you guys, but we were all growing and changing. I can’t blame you guys, except you, Chris.”

“Me?” his voice reaches higher as the time passes by.

“Oh please, we all know you went from a street rat like us to the high priest and prince of school,” Teddy adds.

Chris scoffs, crossing his arms, “Gordie?”

“I mean, you did drop us after you got with Stephanie Wheeler,” Gordie deflects, shrinking in size as he knows the blows coming next. He adds, “The rich bitch of high school whose daddy is the principal.”

“This is bullshit, I should’ve never decided to come,” he shoots daggers at you.

“You’re right, you shouldn’t of because we all know that you’re embarrassed of even being seen with us,” Vern adds, caution to the wind.

Chris scoffs again as he takes up his bag, starting back to town.

“So, you’re just gonna leave?!” you scream as he creates distance.

“I fucking knew it!” Gordie screams, grabbing his bag as well to follow Chris on the opposite side of the tracks.

You watch with pain as each of the boys start back to town. All except Teddy, who manages to stand there with teary eyes.

“I just wanted us to enjoy the time, find my dog, and hopefully have one last high school hurrah before we are all forced apart,” he sniffles.

You look at him with matching sadness, “I-I’m sorry Teddy, I didn’t mean to act out like that. I just couldn’t stand another minute, let alone night, with no one planning on speaking to each other. It would have all been for nothing. Even if we had found your dog, we still would’ve hated each other. This is my fault, Teddy, I’m sorry.”

“It’s not, Y/N, it was gonna happen eventually,” his eyes watch them go, but the look in his eye is distant - his mind far beyond where they’re heading.

“We can still look for Butch together?” you manage to smile, tears brimming your eyes.

“I don’t feel like it anymore,” you can visibly see his body deflate.

“Well, can you at least stay? If there’s still some shred of them left, I think they’ll come around again. I still want to rekindle our relationship. I’ve missed you so much, Teddy,” by the time you’re finished, fresh tears are starting to roll down your cheeks.

Teddy’s voice cracks as a tear slips down his cheek, too, opening his arms to pull you in for a hug beside him on the grass.

You smile thankfully as you lean in, sighing at the comfort and history.

“It ain’t going well with my Pops, as you’d assume. He’s still a crazy bastard, but I’m sticking with him. Just for a little longer, as long as I can.”

“Understandable. We can’t forget your ear, can we?”

“Whatever,” he smirks, “What about you?”

“Mom and Dad still fight. If they aren’t fighting, neither of them are home to ensure that they don’t have to fucking see each other. Ace is still a prick, too. I wouldn’t expect him to graduate and still stay in this bum-fuck town.”

“Guess he doesn’t want his reputation to be forgotten,” Teddy giggles.

“Guess so,” you trail off, noticing the sun starting to set and the sky change color. “You think they’re coming back?”

“No, but I can hope.”

You look up at him sadly and nod. “Wanna set up camp for the night anyway?”

He nods silently, taking up his sleeping bag and finding a soft spot to lay out in the grass.

Silently, you follow his lead, walking down the side of the tracks to the opening of the trees, laying your sleeping bag just beside the first tree, hidden under the canopy of leaves. He decides to go in a little deeper, a few feet away from you, protected by the dimmer lighting in a proactive attempt to block the harsh sun that’ll come in the morning.

Sighing, you both settle in, staring at the sky. Before you know it, your miniscule, unimportant chit chat with Teddy dies down and sleep overtakes you swiftly. There’s no dreams as you toss and turn, but your glad there’s no deeper thoughts that’ll plague you and leave you wide awake.

You don’t know how long you’ve been sleeping until the soft snapping of twigs perk your ears, harshly throwing all of the sleep from your fogged mind and automatically putting it into defensive state.

Peaking around with your eyes, you catch a figure some ways to your left, walking away from your temporary camp. By the distance the figure has created and the direction of their walk, you can tell they were either walking through or around your huddle, no doubt near your camp regardless.

You flip onto your belly as silently as possible, hand sliding slowly to the underside of your pillow, fingers touching cold metal. You pull the gun from under you, the uncomfortable and foreign weight of it settling in your hand, bringing more unease into your heart and bones.

You lift yourself up slowly, noticing that Gordie and Vern have, in fact, returned and settled in a circle with you and Teddy. However, there is no sign of Chris, not even a bag.

You let out a slow breath to try and calm your racing nerves as you follow the figure, gun raised and aimed at the black figure. You gain on the figure silently, until your foot makes a horrible crunch as it breaks the branch beneath it. Cursing under your breath, you raise the gun in defense, both hands grasping and eyes trained.

The figure spins around, voice accusatory, “What the f-? Hey...” the voice lowers instantly, hands coming up to show they are unarmed. “Hey, Y/N, put the gun down,” the voice registers in your head as the figure emerges from the darkness and into the glow of the moon breaking through the trees.

“Chris?” you groan, lowering the gun instantly, shoulders dropping. “What the fuck were you thinking? Sneaking around in the woods? You know the way I sleep, man.”

“Knew,” he clarifies, “And, I was just going for a walk to clear my mind.”

“Why do you keep doing that?” you ask with a creep of annoyance settling in, pinching the bridge of your nose with your fingers. “Why do you keep acting like you’re camping with strangers? Like you have absolutely no knowledge of who we are?”

“Because I don’t; I don’t know the people you have all become now. Even if there are slivers of the people I knew that show every now and then, they are no longer the people they were nor who they are now,” he steps closer to you, enough to reach out to you if he wanted to.

“I can’t say that we are who we were because that’s impossible, but we are still those loving people we were. I’ve noticed that Vern still carries a comb and is a little sensitive. Gordie is still quiet and finds meanings in everything. Teddy still has such and undoubted devotion to his father and his infatuation with the army. I still bother the shit out of everyone and parent them as a way of care. But you,” you pause, assessing him as the sadness settles in your voice and heart again, a cold shock coursing through your veins, “I can only see a person in front of me. You look like Chris, you still have that leaderly inclination, but besides that, everything has changed. Even your eyes have a different look to them, yet they are still that same pair I last looked at 5 years ago.”

Chris says nothing, his mask fitting into place and revealing nothing to you - it doesn’t even look like any of your words are reaching him.

“You keep acting like everyone here is out to get you, but we are simply just being ourselves. You see us as enemies because we had a falling out, but that’s natural. We changed - you changed - and you want to blame us for something that was out of our hands. We are still here for you Chris, I’ve always been here,” your voice is cracking as you look down at your feet, kicking some leaves and twigs to divert your attention somehow.

A hand reaches beneath your chin, tugging your head up to look into those sapphire irises once again. “You were never my enemy, you were my greatest fear,” Chris says, a pitiful grin pulling at his lips. “You know why I chose to become better? Why I went out with the cheerleaders, tried out for football, worked hard to get into the smart kid classes?”

“W-Why?” you look at him, pain and confusion streaking your E/C eyes like lightning in a storm.

“Because I knew that if I stayed where I was, I would never be able to give you what you wanted - never been able to give you everything you deserved. At first, I distanced myself because I thought I would never be good enough for you; that distance was what you needed and for me to get out of your sights, so that that better man would show up and lift you off your feet. But, you were insistent,” Chris giggles sadly as his mask starts to fall, his eyes showing the same pain and suffering that reflects off of yours. “I chose to blame you for the pain of losing you, so you would never look at me with those eyes again; never show me this source of genuine love that was undeserved and unfair.”

“But, you promised me that we would be together forever?” you question, a tear slipping from your eye as you stare at him with the newfound information. Pain of losing him, sadness of bringing such turmoil and insecurity to himself, suffering from the rift that could’ve never been, and regret that if you had known, this would have all been avoided as a whole.

“I know I made that promise, and I’m the world’s biggest hypocrite and idiot. It doesn’t matter how far away we’ve become, you can still manage to look at me with that undeserved care?” he mostly questions himself as his eyes search all over your face, both hands cupping your face in his hands.

Your hands go up to hold his wrists, looking at him with such longing. “You deserve the world, Chris. You always have and always will. You are too pure for the hand you were dealt, and yet you still push yourself farther above.”

His eyes round and snap to yours with confusion and disbelief, searching you for some sort of trick. “I’ve always loved you, Chris. No one has ever made me so damn pissed off or more loved with just one look or action. It doesn’t matter who I’ve used or dated to temporarily distract me, I’ve always worried and searched for you. You’ve always been in the deepest part of my brain. I-I still love you...so damn much.”

“You’ve always been different and I like that. You’re the biggest pain in my ass, but my greatest mistake. I love you, Y/N,” Chris smiles, a genuine display of delight and content as tears slide down his cheeks with the relinquishment of pain and torture. He’s waited too damn long for this. “I’ve always wanted to do this,” he smirks devilishly, eyes delving to your lips and up to your eyes before he leans in.

Your chapped lips meet his fresh, plump ones, smeared with chapstick with the taste of lemon. Your hands goes up to tangle in his long, blonde locks as his arms reach down to your hips to keep you tightly trapped against him; like he fears that if he doesn’t hold you tight, you’ll slip away like every dream he’s ever had of you - his greatest happiness.

You pull him in just as tight, arms around his shoulders as your hands tug, fearing the feeling of losing him again. When you part for air, you still never let go of each other, your head ducking in between the crook of his neck and shoulder. You breathe in his scent and save it to your memory as a smell you hoped to never forget or live without.

“Well, it’s about damn time! God damn!” Teddy yells from his cross legged position on his sleeping bag.

Gordie and Vern start to whoop and holler from their comfort of sleeping bags with deep pleasure and happiness.

“I knew you guys would make up eventually,” Vern added with a soft giggle.

“I was starting to miss my parents,” Gordie chided with a roll of his eyes.

“Does that mean we can all be friends now?” Vern adds with a playful glint in his eye and you couldn’t help but giggle.

“I mean, I guess I could, y’know, hang around a while,” you tease, earning a shove to your side by Chris as you both walk back to your seats on your sleeping bag.

That night, you all stayed up late trading stories of what you’ve missed within the short time away from each other, and for once since the start of your adventure, you see the benefits of their changes.

They aren’t the same people you once knew because they are now their best versions, and will continue to change for the many years to come. It’s only up to you guys to keep that connection strong and adapt with them that will keep you all bound together forever.

It was your greatest promise, but there’s been a few changes: “No matter how far away we are nor how different we become, we will always find a way back to each other. Friends forever.”

You and Chris made your own promise, too: “Whatever happens, we will learn to overcome together, forever and always, in love and sickness, at the best and worst moments. Lovers forever.”

#chris chambers #chris chambers x reader #chris chambers imagine #river phoenix #river phoenix x reader #river phoenix imagine #stand by me #stand by me x reader #stand by me imagine #gordie lachance #wil wheaton #Jerry O'Connell #vern tessio #teddy duchamp #corey feldman #ace merrill #keifer sutherland #1986

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criticallyacclaimedstranger · 2 years ago

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Fic: Thank You For Waiting For Me

Read on Ao3

My Frankie Morales masterlist

Fandom: Triple Frontier

Ship: Francisco “Catfish” Morales x Reader/you (cishet woman)

Warnings: generic non-graphic piv sex, Sweetness and Fluff, mention of disagreement, FRANKIE IS CONSENT KING

Summary: Frankie always thanks you for waiting for him when he returns from deployment.

Words: 910

A/N: For @missredherring for expressing an interest.

The first time Frankie said it, you got mad.

"Thank you for waiting for me." The whisper, delivered into your ear as he embraced you tightly, was heavy with relief and a sorrow that you didn't understand.

"Of course I did, why wouldn't I?"

"I'd never expect you to."

What was supposed to be a happy reunion turned into an argument when you questioned his statement. Did he think so little of you and your commitment to him? Did he not see himself as worthy of your love? Were you wasting your love on someone worthless? Was your love worthless?

The fight wasn't a long one, the physical need for each other after months apart drove you to make up very quickly, and in your favorite way: with you on your back, Frankie pinning you down and sweating for fucking his cum deep inside you. After, you talked about it, and he managed to somehow explain what he meant and why.

"I've seen so many wives and girlfriends leave." His chest rose in a deep sigh, and you passed your hand over it, as if you could touch his breath. "Even the most solid of marriages dissolve because of what we do for a living. And I've lost girlfriends because of it, too."

You didn't know what to say to that. It still felt like he didn't believe enough in your devotion to him to think that you'd stay.

"I just don't want you to wake up one day and regret all the time you spent waiting for me. Or staying because you feel obliged to."

The words cut messily into your heart, like a dull blade through a loaf of bread with a crisp crust. But instead of hurting, your body was flooded by a sense of assurance.

"I will wait because you make it worthwhile," you told him with all the confidence you could muster, to let him know that you were certain of what you were saying.

"You are the one who makes the effort. You may be away from home for months at a time, but you make up for it when you're home." You place a soft little kiss on his lips. "You are present when you're with me. So attentive, so loving." Another gentle kiss lands on his lips. "And that requires a lot more work than me sitting here alone does."

"It's not hard, not with you," he shrugged shyly. You nodded, a smile growing on your lips.

"Exactly. It's not hard, not with you. Frankie, I wouldn't wait for anyone but you."

He was happy with that. But he never stopped saying it. Even now, a couple of years later, when you open the front door just as Frankie is digging in his pockets for the key, and instead releases his bag on the ground to hold you as tightly as he can in the doorway. Even now does he say it.

"Thank you for waiting for me."

The words are whispered with a different kind of security than before. Now he knows you'll wait, but he still thanks you for it, because that's just who Frankie is.

"Thank you for coming back to me," you reply in an equal whisper, and only then does he brush his lips over yours in the first hint of a kiss. You back into the house and close the door, and that's when he kisses you properly. He pours all the kisses he couldn't give you over the past few months into this one. And you kiss him back with equal amounts of longing and lacking, relishing the first prickles of his mustache that he stopped shaving as soon as he was back stateside. As you stumble into the bedroom, he makes only one pit stop before pulling your sweater over your head.

"May I?"

"If you don't, I'm sending you back out there."

Francisco Morales, king of consent. Even when you're practically ripping his shirt open, he will stop to make sure you want it.

The first time always borders on desperate. Frankie wants to slow it down but gets carried away by your hurry. You always want him a little too soon, need him to push his way into your core with a stinging forcefulness that assures you that he is indeed back, he is here, cradling your cheek as you whimper from the stiff intrusion.

"I'm hurting you." The alarm in his voice is prominent. You shake your head vigorously.

"You're loving me."

You pull him down on top of you and move your pelvis, make him fit inside you as you kiss him, your tongues dancing together as your walls become slick, allowing his cock to slide more freely.

He takes you fast, and you allow him to let go with no thought of your own climax. He'll see to you later, right now you simply relish how he wants you, claims you, loves you, fucks you - if it goes too fast, so fast that you don't get to cum, that's okay. You whisper your I love yous into his ear when he's about to cum, and that is his undoing: he spills with a sobbed moan, his lips on yours without kissing, just exchanging warm breaths.

Waiting for him is not a duty, or a chore, or a burden. It is what it is, and you do it because it's him, it's Frankie, and he makes it worth it.

#francisco catfish morales #francisco frankie morales #frankie morales #frankie morales x you #frankie morales x reader #triple frontier fanfic #my fic

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artistsfuneral · 6 months ago

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Hello! My current project is a ciri x Roche- lol sorry, I couldn't resist, what is with this girl. 😂 I'm working on a jaskier/Geralt fic today, or I will when I'm permitted to move. Right now my labor is required to pet a very good cat. He is orange and very fluffy. Do you have a current project you're excited about? If you're still taking prompts, how about something with cutagens? :3 Do you think cat wtichers, or witchers in general, scent mark the way real cats do? Now I'm picturing Geralt rubbing his jaw against Roach lol. Or you could do something with Jaskier discovering that wolf witchers all sleep together in piles in the winter, like puppies. Whatever you feel like. Have a good day!

VERY THIN ICE my dear 😂😅 [they had us in the first half, not gonna lie]

I hope you got into safety from your hostage situation and managed to work a bit on your fic!

My creativity is a bit all over the place right now, I'm doing lots and lots of things. I returned to journaling, did a lot of crocheting, drew a bit, wrote a bit, got into fantasy map making, consumed a lot of Gab Smolders horror Let's Plays, started learning norwegian for no reason, etc. etc. Chaotic, but I'm having fun!

Fandomwise I'm also all over the place, but maybe returning a bit to the witcher? Honestly I just love this fandom so much, that's why I keep coming back. So many talented people. ❤❤❤

I have SO MANY cutagen thoughts. So many. So, so many. Have you read my stories? You should totally (re)read my cutagen stories! My main... focus? when I think about how different schools interact with each other is to think about how each school should have different cutagens to make them unique and kind of to keep things interesting? (a cut here because this got long)

See, I've had cats for most of my life and currently we have one cat and two doggos, so I can get a bit particular about cutagens. So whilst I definitely love the thought of all witchers purring when they're happy, part of me says NO! only kitties purr! (which would include Griffins and Manticores) What do wolves do then? Dogs and wolves have this kind of happy growl that's not really a growl just a kind of noise they make that varies from dog to dog. Some have a barky-howl, a soft awuu, others whine or huff. It's a bit hard to describe if you never heard it, but if you watch enough funny dog videos you know what I'm talking about. Especially some of the more vocal wolves just growl constantly which sometimes sounds like a dangerous growl, but they just have these... gravely growly voices.

Cats playing versus dogs playing is also super interesting. Both chase each other around the house, swat and paw at each other, biting is on the table but cats will just use their paws a lot more and dogs definitely bite more. If your cats get loud while playing, 60-70% of the time that's an angry noise. Dogs are almost always loud when playing rough and they're having the time of their life.

I actually fell in love with dogs when my friend took me out to walk two of them and she let them off leash and they immediately started playing like two feral viking gods- It looked so rough, they were so loud and fast and you could see the power behind it when they tackled each other with their full body weight. Absolutely chaotic. But they were having the time of their lives. (they were very well matched strength and size wise and had known each other for years, so it was totally normal for them to play this crazy)

Okay getting off track, you did this to yourself nonny. ❤😂

My favorite wolf witcher cutagen headcanon is that they have hackles. Just- a row of really dense, thick fur that starts just above their shoulder blades and grows along their spine/neckline up and into their hair. And it first starts to grow in when the mutagens slowly settle into their genes (there's this whole eating magic mushrooms thing before the Grasses) and some of the wolves decide to shave it off (especially those that spend more time in cities - makes them appear more normal) butthe hackles actually help a lot with communication. A raised hackle means distress of some sort and depending on how high it's raised the higher the level of stress is. But it's also great for character design- A dog's hackle depends on their fur texture and length. Really short hair means a spiky little hackle, icredibly long hair means you can't really see it rising and some dogs (like my own :3) have a type of fur that makes their hackle look like a hyena/dinosaur monster. Very prominent, very obvious and easy to read. (Lambert would have one of those.) I actually drew you some fanart that I will add to this post if I remember, where you can kind of see what I mean. 👀😁

Scent marking is a dominant trait in the cat cutagens. Everything and everyone has to be marked as someone's. No argument here. I don't really know if wolves do it as much as the cats, but at least a little bit. (I do like to write it into my stories because it's the right kind of possessive behaviour *swoon*) I think from a logical standpoint the big difference would be that dogs/wolves smell very strongly when wet and that anything they use a lot (like a favorite blanket or Jaskier) equally starts smelling like wet dog when wet. Can't say I noticed that with my cats. Also wet dogs are more prone to rub themselves against you? Don't know if that's a scent thing or a "you make a great towel" thing.....

Yeah, I think I will leave it here for now 😂😂😂😂 kudos if you've come so far. If you have anything else cutagen wise that you need my opinion on let me know XD

#rambles #the witcher #artistsfuneral about the witcher #cutagens #witcher #ask answered #witcher headcanons

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incorrectringsofpower · 2 months ago

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Season 2 First 3 episodes thoughts (spoilers below the cut, DO NOT click the cut if you do not want to be spoiled!)

Episode 1

The dimples are a bit disarming ngl.

The chorals Bear added are interesting. Someone translate them please and thank you.

Ewwwww bug!Sauron nope nope nope.

Why hallo there handsome asshole :D

What's in the pouuuuch? (I don't think we're ever gonna find out tbh)

O shit are these the raft redshirts? Oh nooo.

I support horse girl rights and wrongs.

Mooom, Galadriel is a lying liar who lies.

Gil-galad looks so done lmfao. "Great-auntie whyyyy."

Elrond about to pull an Elwing.

I want to see my little boy (Isildur). (Where is heeeee?)

Hello Glüg, you SDCC photo gem.

Ah Waldreg you fucker. Guess you figured out between seasons that he ain't Sauron.

Lmao not Sauron pulling a Moses on Adar. Wtf are you doing buddy?

Nori my beloved

Wow The Stranger has so much vocabulary now. I still think he swallowed a Harfoot dictionary.

Ok additional Harfoot food note: Beetles (scarab beetles?)

Oh yeah some fic writers are reaaaaally gonna enjoy the scenes of Halron chained and collared. Here comes another fic deluge!

Sauron, don't you remember what happened with Huan in the FA?

BEN DANIELS TIME LET'S GOOOOO.

RIP to this random elf messenger bc I don't think he's gonna make it.

Ben Daniels has the raaaaange.

Eärendil mentionnnn. And Beleriand mention! I wonder why the Mariana Trench option wasn't considered in the TA. Update: Ok nvm Círdan will answer that for us.

Poppy! Hopefully the others can still travel without the maps she took.

The music is so prettyyyy.

"Your people have been set free." #doubt (show me the proof! also why did Sauron want that? He needed slaves to work the fields in Mordor, right?)

Ah Waldreg did die in the exact episode we predicted.

More elf nuns!

Elf costumes! I need an analysis post!

Lmao Elrond's face. "Grunkle Círdan, you betrayed meeee!"

Galadriel: How 'bout I do anyway?

Elrond: Thanks I hate it.

Galadriel: Please don't jump off waterfalls again.

Mirdania! Aw shit Halron got there before the nameless doomed Lindon elf.

Ominous ending music, Bear.

Episode 2

DWARVES MY BELOVED

I love the terrace farming so much.

Dwarf food note: Mole-tail stew, Large mushroom (chanterelle-like) that is very valuable, smaller mushrooms, gourds!

ilu Disa

This scene was exactly what I needed for dwarves and dwarvish food reasons.

Oh shit not my dwarves :(((

Alfirin seeds!

Ooh creepy!

New elf characters! Do they have names? Please give them names!

"Crush two spiders with one boot." Ooh I hate the foreshadowing of that metaphor. Hates it, hates it.

More foreshadowiiiing.

Mirror of Galadriel foreshadowing specifically!

Eregion is so beautiful and majestic (thanks, Season 2 budget!). Sure do hope nothing bad happens to it! (sobbing)

Yup, RIP Lindon messenger elves.

I looove this music.

Skeletor! (By the power of Grayskull!)

Ooh cultists.

The Dweller is back!

"curse upon our flesh" wut

I have a bad feeling about this. (Wait, wrong fandom)

Where is Narviiii.

Do Disa's friends have naaames? Wait x-ray actually was helpful for once. Rachel Payne as Brenna and Laura Jane Matthewson as Revna! I'm so happy she has named friends who even gossip!

Hi Narvi!

King Durin: But do I still have grandparent's rights?

"Stubborn as a root-bound parsnip!" Hah.

Oh my god he's working on ships. I love that so much.

Ooh shit a flashback to the woods scene from Udûn.

Why are you shaving, sir? Sir.

Ahhhh poetry mentions from the FA! How nerdy.

The bell seems bad.

Eye of Sauron?

Uh-oh. Is this how he learns how squishy hobbits are on adventures?

Ooh he's developing door ideas. Fun!

I get the feeling Mirdania ain't gonna last the season, either.

Fuuuck tower foreshadowing.

Ooh elf umbrella!

Oh you little weasel!

"I'm going to open a First Age bottle." Love that detail.

"Are you my friend?" Hoo boi.

Ominous thunderclap. Ooooh.

Is he gonna larp as an Istar? Lmao.

"Soon every realm will fall." Because of you, asshole!

Title drop!

Wow. Okay. Playing on his insecurities and also calling him the "Lord of the Rings". Overdoing it a bit much there, Ronnie?

"I am your partner." screech

Pope-galad says you need babysitter, Gal. I'm sure this will go splendidly!

Episode 3

Bronwyn ;_;

Berek best boi my beloved

Sad Elendil and Valandil :(((

YESSS OH MY GOD IT'S HAPPENING. EVERYONE STAY CALM. IT'S HAPPENING!

ISILDUR SAVE YOUR HORSE FOR THE LOVE OF ERU.

Pls don't kill Berek. I couldn't stand it 😭

ISILDUR BEST HORSE GIRL

THEY'D BOTH BETTER LIVE OR SO HELP ME

FUCKING RUN ISILDUR FFS

(GOD I HATE LARGE FANTASY SPIDERS AND THIS IS WHY)

Ooh the shells funerary detail!

Eärien girrrrl your evil phase alarms me.

This ship is so saddd :(

More ominous tower shit.

Pharazôn, you weasel 2.0.

Fucking foreshadowiiiing.

Valandil my beloved! Oooh tension with Kemen.

A baby orc! Fascinating!

Damrod has arrived!

More title dropping!

"--a friend." The emphasis was so funny.

Durin is suspicious. Love it.

Celebrimbor: Well if I start a Catholic schism then so be it.

It is your moment, Holly-boy, but also your doom. You're being Anakined into Vader by Palpannatar.

Isildur has discovered the DnD means of equipment acquisition.

Noooo more dead horsies :(

Estrid :D (please don't be evil)

Lmao at least he knows proper wound procedures lol.

DO NOT HURT BEREK

Potato food spotted!

ARONDIR YASSS

THEY STOLE BEREK NOOOOO

Arondir sir you are low on arrows.

Arondir ;_;

Bronwyn :(((( fuck I'm so sad about this

I will never recover from the Aronwyn ship, I fear :(

Theo, buddy, need someone to talk to?

Sad version of Aronwyn theme nooooo :(

Really not liking how much King Durin's crown sorta resembles Sauron's this season.

Theo taking over his mother's skills :(

Yup, poisoned orc arrow theory confirmed.

Stepparenting with foreshadowing for Numenor, delightfulll.

Please don't be foreshadowing.

Who is his dad? Oh no hurtful, Theo. Buddy :(

My Garden Fam is broken and I'm deeply unwell about it.

Theo-Isildur friendship time?

BEREK HEIST BEREK HEIST

Isildur really is so relieved to be alive and not eaten by spiders that he's gone friend mode. How very like his Grunkle Elrond!

Oh no Isildur mom backstory :(

Don't cry Isildur and Theo bc then I'm gonna cry ;;_;;

Also now this is a narrative parallel!

Ah good gift discussion next to the word "precious" is throwing my brain. Oh lordy.

Please don't be evil, Estrid! I'm already suffering without Bronwyn and both Disa and Míriel are doomed af.

Theo wtf are you doing?

ENTS.

No don't lose the sword Galadriel gave you!

Míriel in white, Elendil in blue and gold, Pharazôn in red. Totally Kate Hawley doing some fascinating storytelling here.

Oh no my quote about Elendil and his daughter in a courtroom is suddenly very apt. Oh dear.

What did Elendil see?

Huh the unrest happened sooner than I thought.

EAGLE TIME LET'S GOOOO!

Eagle: Y'all are gonna die!

Elendil: Top 10 anime betrayals and by my own daughter. Wtf.

Annatar gets his own cute lil forging outfit :D

More symbolism!

Oh god what a way to end the first 3 episodes. Send help.

#trop spoilers #the rings of power spoilers #incorrectringsofpower #cinnia speaks #i am unwell

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outlanderfandomfollies · 1 year ago

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The faux "funeral receipts" the extreme shippers use are most certainly NOT "undebunkable" 🙄

Someone recently sent me this comment by a SamCait shipper regarding my debunk of the "funeral receipts."

Hi @sgiandubh. It is interesting that you claim to have read my debunk of the "funeral photos" on my main Contemplating Outlander (CO) blog, even though those debunks are not on that blog (which is no longer an Outlander blog). Instead, they are on my side blog, Outlander Fandom Follies, which I have been using to post debunks during the past three years.🤔

For those who don't know, I shipped SC for two months in the spring of 2015, until I figured out that they weren't a couple. (It really wasn't hard to figure out--as long as one was willing to SEE the mountain of evidence that the ship wasn't real.)

Although I understand the appeal of shipping, I also understand one has to use pretzel logic to keep believing in the SC ship. Especially now that we definitely know that C and T got married 4 years ago in a Roman Catholic ceremony (confirmed by the MC that some fans got from the GRO--which, BTW, cannot send out copies of a "fake" MC).

IT'S JUST NOT REAL: The bottom line is that after C married T, the SC conspiracy that supports the SC ship has become a bizarre belief that has no basis in reality.

As S said in the IFH: "You know... it's just-- It's not real."**

Despite sgiandubh's protestations that the "funeral receipts" are "undebunkable," those of us who haven't chosen to get lost down the SC rabbit hole know they are false "receipts," based on shipper wishful thinking. This is because:

C is married to T and NOT to S.

Screenshots of someone's back (or screenshots where one otherwise cannot see someone's face) are not sufficient to definitely identify anyone. (Haven't you ever mistaken someone from the back, and when they turned around you realized they were someone else?🤷🏻‍♀️) Furthermore, we certainly have lots of examples of S and C "receipts" that later turned out not to be S or C, but instead, just someone who looked like S or C from the back or from a distance.

S's hairline on the side of his forehead does NOT match the guy's in the funeral video, which is more rounded. (However, C's brother K's hairline matches.) In addition, S's hair had been shaved down at that time and the man's hair in the video wasn't shaved (and neither was K's hair). To rationalize away that inconvenient fact, the shippers claimed S had to have been wearing a "wig." 🙄 Sorry, but if the ONLY way you can make a person in a screencap "receipt" match the person you want them to be is to claim that they must have been wearing a "wig," your "receipt" is NOT in the realm of "undebunkable."

Although some shippers say that the guy in the video could not be C's brother K, because he doesn't have the right build, I disagree. First of all K is a big guy (and we don't know what he looks like from the back). Second, some of the "bulk" in the screencaps appears to be due to fuzzy resolution. Someone sent me a very clear screencap, and the guy's body build looked less bulky and more like K's build. In addition, if K was wearing a jacket with shoulder pads, his back would have seemed wider.

The woman in the funeral video whom the shippers say is S's mother CH, has much blonder hair than CH. And CH has only worn her hair in that exact style a few times. I also think the two women's body shapes and heights are different. (I go into more detail about all of this under the cut.)

Finally, it seems pretty clear that S was in Mexico on Aug.10, 2022. (You can read why @bcacstuff claims that S was in Mexico the evening of Aug. 10th in her comment in the reblog of this POST).

See POST 1, POST 2, POST 3 for some detailed debunks (from myself and others) about the funeral "receipts."

See below the cut for:

A more detailed "CH funeral receipt" debunk.

Some more detail about the "S funeral receipt" debunk.

How confirmation bias impacts the outcome of shipper searches for "receipts," often leading them to find false receipts of random people whom they assume are S or C.

More reasons why I don't believe the ship is real.

Why I believe the SC shipper beliefs are based on the 5 common (false) tinhat beliefs that have been found in tinhat groups across fandoms.

How Confirmation Bias Skews the SamCait Shipper "Receipt" Searches

THE PROBLEM WITH "SEARCHING" FOR "RECEIPTS": The SamCait shippers didn't just "happen" to see someone in the funeral video whose back vaguely looked like S's. They went purposely hunting through grainy funeral video footage for someone who resembled S--because in the obituary, the reference to T (and not S) as a son-in-law had freaked them out. In other words, they were looking for reassurance that the ship was "real."

Confirmation bias is the tendency to overvalue information that supports one’s beliefs and to undervalue or overlook information that does not. When one goes searching for something, confirmation bias will often lead one to see what one wants to see.

I believe the false "funeral receipts" involving S and his mother CH are examples of how confirmation bias resulted in shippers being led astray.

A MORE DETAILED DEBUNK OF THE CH "FUNERAL RECEIPT": The CH "funeral receipt" is very easy to debunk. The reality is the shippers found a woman with light blonde hair and a hairdo that CH sometimes wears and must have decided that no other woman in the world wears that hairdo.🤦🏻‍♀️

However, if you just do a quick google search for CH, you will see that she has worn her hair all sorts of ways and not always the way the woman wore it in the funeral video. As can be seen in the thumbnail photos below, CH's hair color is also much darker than the light blonde hair of the woman in the video. Finally, the body shape (and possibly height) of the two women don't seem to match (at least in my opinion).

Regardless, IMHO to claim that that woman in the funeral video was definitely CH is a real stretch.

AN ADDITIONAL DEBUNK OF THE "S FUNERAL RECEIPT": I believe that the man that C is next to at the funeral mass is most likely her brother K or some other relative. Shippers claim that K doesn't have the right build. However, earlier in this post, I explained why I still thought it was likely K. In addition, I previously also explained why K's hairline and hair length better match the man in the video than S's hairline and hair length. (And no, I don't believe that was S in a "wig."🤦🏻‍♀️)

K also has a large forehead like S and like the man in the video.

Also, at least when I looked at the video, the few times you could see the mystery man turn slightly, he didn't have S's cheekbones. (And no, I'm not going to post pictures of the guy from the funeral or of K to prove my point--it just feels like a step too far into intrusiveness to do so, especially regarding screenshots from a video at a family funeral. I acknowledge that there is some hypocrisy on my part, because I'm writing about what I saw when I looked at the video and screencaps people sent me. But somehow that seems like a lesser offense. 🤷🏻‍♀️)

Finally, as I've said before, we have countless examples of how extreme shippers touted blurry photos, or photos of the back of someone, as being SC “receipts” that were later debunked when we got a better look at the person they were claiming was either S or C. A few examples are: Faux S at the Women’s March in Jan. 2017; Faux S at the Delpozo NYFW show in Sept. 2017; Faux S in Paris in Oct. 2016; the 3 Faux Cs (yes 3) at the Laophroaig anniversary event in Sept. 2015; and a Faux C and a Faux CH (S's Mom) at the National Theater in August 2015.

In conclusion, it is just not true for SC shippers to claim that the screencaps/ gifs/ video clips of the back of a man or a woman with a blonde hairdo at the funeral are "undebunkable," and therefore must be S and CH. It is much more reasonable to assume that the man in the video was either C's brother K or another family member, and the woman was just some unknown relative or friend of the family.

THIS Is "Tinhat" Shipping

THE SC SHIP IS A "TINHAT" SHIP: The current SC shipper beliefs are a form of "tinhat shipping" (based on 5 common (false) tinhat beliefs) that exists across many fandoms.

Sometimes it is easier to see how off-the-wall these beliefs can be if they are seen from a distance from one's own fandom. So let's see how these beliefs play out in a different fandom: the Twilight fandom, and the Robsten "tinhat" ship.

THE ROBSTEN "TINHAT" SHIP: Perhaps the closest parallel to the current SC shipper beliefs are the beliefs of the Twilight Robsten shippers. The Robstens believe that Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are secretly married with children, despite the fact that Robert has been dating Suki Waterhouse for 5 years, and Kristen has been in a lesbian relationship with her fiancée Dylan Meyer for four years.

Sounds (and looks) familiar, doesn't it?

BTW, in terms of finding "receipts," the Robstens do something very similar to what the SC extreme shippers (ES) do. According to Bustle:

Several [Robsten] blogs scour paparazzi photos of either celebrity for bystanders that resemble their "partner."

No wonder, the Robstens are so off-base with their beliefs about Robert and Kristen.

Other Reasons Why the SC Ship Isn't Real

THE SAMCAIT CONSPIRACY WOULD NOT BE LEGAL: First of all, there is no legal way in this day and age that TPTB could force two B/C-list actors to "hide" a relationship/ marriage and "3-5 boos" for nearly 10 years--while simultaneously being forced to date others and (in C's case to "pretend" to be married to T).

THE SC CONSPIRACY ISN'T PLAUSIBLE: In addition, none of the variations on the SC conspiracy theory make any sense. They don't meet the basic criteria that John Stewart proposed to determine whether a conspiracy could be plausible.

For instance, it would be completely impractical to hide an entire family for years, swear countless friends, family, colleague, teachers, babysitters, fans with camera phones, etc. to secrecy, and make two B/C-list stars "pretend" to date/be married to others and to spend holidays apart, etc. All to "hide" a romance that would actually be a publicity goldmine for the show.

There is a point where anyone with any common sense knows that such a weird belief just isn't real. The SC ship hit that mark years ago.

I don't care how much "evidence" the SC shippers come up with to support their ship. It won't change my mind because the underlying premise of the SC ship is not plausible.

When a belief isn't true, you know the "receipts" used to support it are based on the true believers "seeing" what they want to see.

That makes ALL of the SamCait "receipts" debunkable.

NOTE: I don't often write full debunks anymore, but I do so when I feel that the shippers have crossed boundaries regarding C, T, and S. In addition, I have always done debunks to help fence sitters and new fans avoid making the mistake of falling down the SC rabbit hole. Finally, I also do it for the seasick shippers who are just tired of the ups and downs of the ship and who are looking for a way off.

[edited]

____________ IMAGE SOURCES: 1) "It's just not real" gif source; 2) "Sam in Mexico" video source; 3) "People don't really want the truth" meme source (before minor edits); 4) CH image search source; 5) video source (before edits) for the "It's just not true" gif; 6) "Robsten manip" source (before edits); 7) video source (before edits) for the "That's not legal" gif; 8) video source for "conspiracy plausibility" screenshot; 9) video source (before edits) for the "You know that isn't true" gif **Below are links to some other posts that explain why I am so sure that the SC ship isn't real:

A general debunk of the rationale behind all the SC conspiracy theories can be found HERE.

This POST explains the ways in which SC shipper leaders have manipulated their followers in order to keep the ship afloat, and how current SC shipper beliefs are right out of the tinhat shipper playbook.

A partial list of past debunks of SC "receipts" can be found HERE.

This POST (only found on the web version of my CO blog) lists some old posts that explain why one cannot believe what one thinks one sees between two romantic leads based on interviews, PR events, behind-the-scenes photos/videos, etc.

There are many other posts that you can find if you look at the "Pages About Fandom and Blog" on the web version of my Outlander Fandom Follies side blog.

#outlander fandom #samcait debunk #sc shippers #my gifs #my edits

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thetentaclecommander · 7 months ago

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20 questions for fic writers

Sures, I'll bite @the-bar-sinister!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 49 on my TheTentacleCommander main 2 on SerpentineAndWet 1 on SoftTentacledJazz (which I will get back to!) and 1 on Waymaiden Jelecia (shelved for now) so in total: 53

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 471,114 in total spanning all accounts the huge bulk being under TTC.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Resident Evil. I'm very much a ride or die writer when it comes to fandom longevity lol

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Electronic Brawling (the Nem/Reader fic I wrote over a weekend, 322) Tentacles Are -Not- Toys (Until They Are) (the Nem/Jill I wrote over a weekend, 288) To Teach a (b)oy (the femdom Jill/Nem fic I wrote cause I wanted to just be as kinky as possible about it, 138) Need. Excite. Take. (a morning warm up I did for a Tyrantfucker chat, 130) Teaching the Devil (my 'serious' drabble that turned into a longfic/1st part of a myth arc around Nem/Jill and all the whatifs that could happen, 105) *yes, I'm aware the smut is what sells lol*

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! I love receiving them and answer, especially in depth ones.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Ah, ha haha this one's tough. My main ship (Nemesis/Jill) is in my hands intentionally angsty so many do end on that note. If I had to chose it'd be a tie between After The Fall - Where Nemesis *really* struggles between caring for her and wanting to hurt the absolute fuck out of her. Necromancy - It's hard surreal/dreamy on purpose (also a fic staple of mine) that ends with Nemesis having done all he has to make Jill 'happy' is so deeply unhappy with himself in the end - but still continues to perpetuate the lotus eater world he's crafted for them.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Where the wild things... - a really hard surreal dream fic of where Nemmy's head was at halfway through the 3rd arc. He has such an idealized, near childlike hope which is big for a generally angry and resentful creature. He clearly wants the world with Jill, where the chase benefits them both but a lot of the edges - like her own traumas - are shaved off. It's telling his dream was inspired by a children's book about dealing with anger, fear and finding/seeking comfort. But it's happy in the sense he gets that comfort he wanted so badly throughout his creation, and that when he awakens, it's with him now determined to reunite with her and their offspring. (con't after the cut)

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not really? When I was on ff.net I got snippy comments (I was a young babby then) but looking back it was just what we'd call today fanpol wanking to wank. These days I assume ppl are aware what I'm about so if I were to garner hate, I'd just laugh and write Nemmy fucking Jill even harder in unfortunate places. I can always go darker, kids.

9. Do you write smut? *stares at the camera deeply* Yesss? All the smut? They tend to range from soft heartwarming lovemaking, to conflicted should we be doing this, to rapey horrors, just weird monstery shit and then the kink. Just kinky shit all over the place. Very character study leaning.

10. Do you write crossovers? Nah. I already have a lot in my head just handling one franchise!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge but with the way I write it's gunna be a pretty fun time in pulling off imitating my voice as I sound high on my own fumes about a decidedly rare pair no one seems to wanna admit liking rofl That and all the formatting hell

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yea! In Russian.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Nah, I'm too much of a prima donna to share billing /jk I just don't like collabing unless it's for an rp but I'm also never say never about such things!

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? *stares even harder at the camera* I...I'm the longest running one trick pony about having a parasitized Tyrant try to not murder with prejudice the most well trained person on the RE cast I make no secret about this :3 Also let me note my other most liked ships I have written on: Weskertine, Creva, and the Ada and Carlos tour. Valenfield ig (I do truly like em but they aren't as exciting to write for in comparison but I indeed do write them sometimes). Note these are for canons, I have loads more favs but they are ocs.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I have like 15+ wips in my drafts. I don't wanna pick one cause it's just painful to look at them begging to be finished. The ones on my account I have every intent to finish. Mostly because they are related to the AU and it wouldn't make sense if I didn't finish them.

16. What are your writing strengths? The sex lol (and being weird with it). I've been told my imagery and word play in general is stellar.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I feel my dialogue could be better and it's where I struggle (unless it's my muses Nem, Jill, Trent and Zeus as they are the ones I've written for the most in fic/rps) so I always try to improve on that always.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Don't wanna. I tried, hated not knowing if the language was correct (looking at you, Carlos) so just did ye old << >> to imply he's not speaking English.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Resident Evil. I am nothing if not persistent. (like my first fic was like in 2005-6? I think?)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? Again another tie but it's a 3 way *eyebrow wiggle*! A Slumber Recalled, A Devil Held - this was my 'can I do something soft but pained at the same time' fic. It's a revisit of the time they finally after 20+ chapters did the do, and it's from her pov instead. A lot of re contextualizing and 'wow both of these people have baggage and are doing this not out of love but to feel heard and it *hurts*'. Proved to myself that I can write something hard hitting without a single cry of physical pain. St. Valentine - where what was to be a simple Valentine's Day fic became a fun sacrilegious love poem from a very not at all obsessive Tyrant and then had an added chapter of the reverse side of Jill sounding mentally not all there almost fragmented in her feelings towards what this was between them. So much enjoyable word play was had. Necromancy - discussed above but has my brand of word play, leaning on the fourth wall/formatting/surreal and increasing uncomfortable.

------- All my writer mutes, have at! @damadisangue @naerwenia @coiled-dragon @s-dei @lmshady @azulas-daddy-kink @depraveddove @unchartedperils @sweet7simple @goth-automaton @dekujin @katophoenix (If I missed one of ya or you do write also join in :D)

#thetentaclecommander writhes and speaks #thetentaclecommander eats reblog bait #also mind the tags on my stuff some of them are spicy #and some of them are violently *spicy*

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misty-caligula · 1 year ago

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I like season 2. I think that it’s a very well put together, well paced, well acted story. I know that I’m not necessarily agreed with on this by everybody, but I want to just say a thing about that.

The modern media machine is brutal and messy. The many cast and crew members that work on any given project are remarkably limited in their individual power, regardless of how high their positions are within the system, they’re all expendable, all just... employees, able to be swapped out if they step out of line according to the corporate interest. They sign contracts that limit their ability to speak openly to us about the realities on the ground, and beyond that they have to acknowledge their own careers in a VERY insular, rumor-heavy community, where being marked as “difficult” destroys you.

I know that a portion of the fandom is unhappy with the pacing in S2. Feels that certain story lines are not given enough time. Kristen felt like she popped out of nowhere. Some folk feel that the adult timeline is too heavily pushed. That the original hunt wasn’t talked about enough. That it’s all just a bit... messy. And I can see how you get there. It’s not been enough to bother me, watching it, but I see how you get there.

I think that I am part of a lucky group, because I find almost all of the characters, in both the teen and adult timelines, equally interesting. But I imagine that if you’re PRIMARILY here for the teens or certain characters it must be very frustrating when your favorites seem AWOL.

But what I do not get is how people go from that to “The writers have no idea what they’re doing, they LIED to us about having a plan, they’re all incompetent, they don’t know what they’re doing.”

Firstly, the writers make the blueprint, sure, but it needs to then be built, filmed, put together, directed, you need to get hours and hours and hours and hours of footage and then edit it all together. We have no IDEA what’s left behind. What was in the script that got dumped for time. Or for the sake of pacing. Or because it was too expensive. Or because of... who knows. We don’t know what we don’t know. The writers do not magically create their ideal version of the show, they only make path for others to follow.

I mean consider you’re an editor and you have 3 different versions of the same line from the same actor, and you have to use the one that most accurately gives a certain energy. One is 2 seconds longer, but clearly the best. You now have to shave 2 seconds off SOMETHING else. Extrapolate that out to 10 hours’ runtime, make sure you never miss anything, and keep the pacing going.

Which leads me onto my big ... Thing. Season 2 only has 9 episodes. Some people in the fandom are really amazing at finding behind the scenes sources on what’s happening, but I cannot find a single word on the reasoning behind cutting back this season. I thus cannot say conclusively that an episode was stolen from the show, that it wasn’t originally planned to be 9 episodes long. But it seems odd. And, IF it WAS meant to be 10 episodes, I can reason out the consequences.

1 episode is 60 minutes. So if you were a writer and you assumed, when you were making the overall outline pre- season 1 that you’d get 10 eps per season, you’d create certain overarching threads. Then you’d sit down to write S2. At what point do you find out that the decision’s been made and you’re an episode short? At the start? Half way? Assume you have 600 minutes of story. Now you have to fit it into 540 minutes. That’s a lot of slices.

Look at what you’ve got. What conversations don’t strictly HAVE to be had? What character development doesn’t HAVE to be done? How much can you rely on what you put into s1, and how much can you rely on the intelligence of your audience, that you can use vibes and the strength of correlating scenes to imply things you WERE going to explicitly state?

I mean... I think about the first hunt. I think about why it’s got so little build up, because ... sure I buy what you’re saying. It’s a bit fast. It FEELS a little like they shot some stuff, or wrote some stuff, that’s missing. Right? So why is it like that?

Well, imagine a hypothetical 10 ep season.

S2E7 Shauna beats down Lottie.

S2E8 Misty takes care of her. The rest of the teens struggle without her. More hallucinations, more issues, not having her is a real problem, and it’s made VERY clear that she’s been the glue that holds them together. Without her they’re falling apart. Van, for example has a reconstruction of her faith, realising that the reality of facing a world where Lott might die is worse than she had thought in the abstract. The last scene of S2E8 Lottie says “If I die, eat me.”

S2E9 Some stuff happens where it’s clear they NEED her. They notice Coach has vanished. Some more stuff about how bad they’re starving, they need food, it’s all they can think about. Then, 1/3rd the way thru, Misty says “Lottie’s dying, she said we should eat her if she does.” They say “No way, we should save her.” They spend 1/3rd of the episode talking it through. Van takes the place as the high priestess of Lottie, Tai’s converted fast, Mari agrees, Misty follows because she’s Misty. They slowly convince the others via calls to needing Lottie OR needing food. Nat holds out til the end, but is eventually persuaded because she realises either she joins in or they’ll just kill her as an outsider. They come to an uneasy peace with the idea, kind of. Last 1/3rd of the episode is the first hunt.

MEANWHILE S2E8 adult world is stuff with Adam, Jeff, Walter, who knows what, maybe more therapy stuff. I feel like a lot of Walter stuff probably got cut, he’s easy to cut stuff from. The women get deeper into the wilderness cult, it’s more clear how far they’re losing their grip, how much they’re buying into Lottie’s new wilderness. End of S2E8, Jeff gives the call about Adam’s body.

S2E9 is the adults sitting around the table. At the end of S2E9 Lottie suggests the poison, with the context of the teens talking about the hunt taking place behind it. Then we have the teens deciding that yes they should do the hunt, and watching it go the way it does. We have more context about WHY the teens decided to do the hunt (it’s not context we do not have now, in the vibes, but it’s more explicit) and we see more why it’s a convincing argument for them when Lottie says it in the adult timeline.

S2E10 probably plays out the same way that S2E9 will in real life.

That is WAY smoother. But that would also make sense as to why it is the way it is right now. Because people are like “Why is the hunt happening NOW?” and honestly? I think it’s because they HAVE to have it now so that S2E9 makes sense for the adults. So that Lott can bring out her kool aid and not have it come out of nowhere. They NEEDED to juxtapose the hunt and the kool aid together, and the hunt always had to happen off- set just slightly to give that context.

This is just a theory. I can’t PROVE that they lost an episode. But I will say this, that making a big project like this is the work of many many hands, and I have faith in the intentions of the creatives involved. I don’t think that people are trying to lie to us, to pretend like there’s all these cool ideas when there aren’t. I think that modern capitalism is a nightmare for making art, and that they’re doing the best in the framework they’re given. I think that Yellowjackets is a fantastic sculpture, and it’s reasonable to say it has its rough edges, as long as we’re acknowledging that literally everything does.

I, for one, am incredibly excited to see what happens in S2E9, and I hope that once the strike is over S3, 4 and 5 will be able to be as close to their vision as they can make them.

#This is just a theory #a yellowjackets theory #yellowjackets #spoilers #long post #.Literally all my posts are long

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subzeroparade · 11 months ago

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Doing the Writing Review 2023 open tag left by @tinygigas, because taking stock of the things you’ve accomplished is supposedly good for your mental health, or so I’ve heard.

(this tag is open so tag yourself and talk about your writing •ᴗ• unless this post has made you go "I should be writing" in which case, go write).

Words and fics ➻ 151,905 words of exclusively Bloodborne work because I decided to give myself wholly and unconditionally to an almost decade-old fandom (as opposed to last year, exclusively Elden Ring) posted on AO3 ➻ 10 fics posted on AO3 ➻2 WIPs, one of which should be done by the end of the year.

Ships ➻ Mostly Ludwig/Laurence, though I think in regards to the “Moon Divorce people come get your juice” tag, I too now count as Moon Divorce people. Also Caryll/Rom, rarepair of my heart.

Top Fic by Kudos ➻ Litanies (73)

Top Fic by Hits ➻ The Feast We Were Promised (1,189)

Fandom Events I organised/ran a little writing workshop for some friends & acquaintances that I think (and hope) went rather well. Everyone’s work was delightful and they took feedback with more grace and enthusiasm than many undergrads I’ve been paid to give these workshops to.

Upcoming Projects ➻ The so-called Moon Deal fic - because I call it that - or at least Part 1 of it by the end of the year. ➻ Some short/experimental pieces if I can get around to it. Something to push me out of my comfort zone, in which I otherwise sit and refuse to budge.

Writing Reflections ➻ I am overjoyed to have had conversations here and elsewhere that have wrung entire fics out of me based on statements not even meant to be prompts - including, Laurence sits on Ludwig’s lap to shave him and Why does Gehrman dress like discount Dracula? ➻ The chance to do real, systematic studies of some of my favourite authors, and find new ones to add to my repertory. All writing is fundamentally derivative - so you might as well get intimate with the voices you love the most. ➻ Under any and all flashy technical mastery and thoughtful research remains the primacy of storytelling. That’s the music.

Thanks for reading, and especially to those who've taken the time to engage. It's WIP Wednesday, so a little snippet of upcoming work below the cut.

#bloodborne #writing #wip #wip wednesday #bloodborne fanfic

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alovelyburn · 2 years ago

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How do you feel about Casca as a character? 👀

Ho boy, okay so, it depends on what timeline we're talking about, but overall I'm not the biggest Casca fan.

Ima put this behind a cut because it's just a long post of me dissecting the reasons I don't click with a popular character and no one who doesn't volunteer needs that in their lives.

tl;dr if you're curious, though: there are times I like her and times when I dislike her, but overall my feeling about her is "oh come on, man."

In the early Golden Age, I felt that she was a pretty interesting character with significant potential. I wouldn't say found her extra-super deep and fascinating like, say, Guts or Griffith, but I thought she was cool - outspoken, tough but with a heart, a competent leader, a formidable foil for Guts. Basically a solid character with a lot of potential for growth.

Also there's something fresh and interesting about the version of a bisexual love triangle where a man and woman are essentially situated as rivals for the affection of a central male figure who ultimately leans toward the man.

Then the cave scene happened, I think this is both the peak of her potential and the beginning of the end of my warm relationship with her, lmao. She gets a backstory and a motivation, her fixation on Griffith gets a foundation, and she shows all the things she's been trying to swallow down. Interesting stuff. From here, we could've had it all.

And then she transitions into being a love interest for Guts and you can kind of... see the minute that this happens - the time Miura may have made the decision to transition her role - because all of a sudden her body language, her presentation, it all changes. She becomes A Love Interest instead of a character to herself, and while I recognize that any supporting character of course exists to be A Something to the leads, it's not really supposed to be that visible. I saw strings hanging from all her limbs. And she never did recover.

Also there's much less fresh or interesting about the version of a bisexual love triangle where a man and woman are situated as rivals for the affection of a central male figure who ultimately leans toward the woman. I'm not trying to be like biased here, I'm just saying this is a more common and thus less interesting to me setup.

Now, this seems to be at odds with the way her character is viewed by most of fandom, but I always feel like the fandom perception of Casca is less based on her actual in series showing and more based on the stories people made up about her that they either slipped between the panels/used to smooth the edges of her canon characterization, or, well...

Well. In the case of a lot of the more mainstream facing Berserk fans... it often feels like the version of her they have in their heads is a merging of like scarce few actual canon scenes (typically the big Gutsca scenes, so like the cave scene, Bonfire of Dreams, the ball scene and the meadow scene, that kind of thing) with all the messy parts shaved off and then shot through with like 20-odd years of building an internal mythology about what she was like and what she would be like when she returned to herself. The fact that so many people were shocked that she ended up being benched immediately afterwards kind of soft-confirmed this for me because it kind of told me that the role people had come to dream of her occupying was not coincident with the role she actually has in the series.

And one of the things that really drives this home for me is, for example, the difficulty people have with her motivations. I'm gonna say this directly: as a character, Casca has always been primarily motivated by whichever guy she is looking to be with at the time. And I'm not saying this because it's good, I'm saying it because it's annoying and the primary reason I don't care for her past the cave scene, but lets go over it for a moment:

Until the cave scene,. she didn't express any particular motive, but she is clearly entirely motivated by Griffith - all she ever talks about is Griffith, the reason she dislikes Guts is a mix of Griffith liking him more than her and Griffith being endangered by his recklessness. Whenever people try to go against Griffith's orders she loses her shit at them, etc etc. Everything she does from her introduction through the cave scene is just about Casca pining after Griffith and trying to make herself what he needs and trying to kick everyone else into line so that he isn't endangered or inconvenienced. This becomes explicit in the cave scene because...

The only motivation she gives in that scene is "Griffith wants to do this, and I want to be the way he does it." If he wants to cut his path, i want to be his sword. There's no expression of wanting him to form that path because she shares that vision, just because he wants to do it. And despite being a woman in an incredibly male-dominated world, one who would presumably materially benefit from his egalitarian vision becoming more normalized, she never says "I want to see the world he's creating" or "I don't want other women to go through what I went through." The closest she gets to anything like that is noting that his common origins made him miraculous to all of them, but even then it was in the context of explaining his appeal rather than establishing that she shared his vision, not to mention that was before she fell in love with him.

Then we get to the meadow scene where she goes on to explain that she was lying when she said that she wanted to be his sword and what she actually wanted was for him to love her romantically. So like... now she's saying that she wasn't even really motivated by wanting to see him achieve his goals, it's just he didn't want her romantically, so being important to him professionally was the consolation prize.

Notably in this very scene, she also says directly that the only reason she's trying to keep the Hawks together is because she wants to hold them together for Griffith. This makes even her greatest achievement - her ability to quickly and efficiently take command in a way that kept the Hawks together long enough to get Griffith out of the dungeon - all about her feelings for Griffith. And if you think about all of that, it clarifies the next thing which is...

As soon as she gives up on Griffith and gets together with Guts, she's willing to ditch the Hawks like a handful of hot potatoes and run off. Which seems really strange on the face of it, since she's always been such dedicated Hawk, but in the context of the above the reason becomes clear: it's because she was only ever there to be where Griffith is, and now she's moved on so she's going to be where Guts is instead.

And that sounds callous and unkind, but it's the truth and it forms the picture of a character who is both wholly consistent and entirely motivated by the D, and I don't like it, and that's why I have a hard time with her.

BUT THERE'S MORE because for many many years I always assumed this was a bad writing issue, but then as it turns out Miura was writing her personality as a collection of his own insecurities and complexes, so its not even that she was meant to be the strong bold warrior that people want her to be and he couldn't write it... it's more that he never thought of her that way to begin with. Which I mean, I guess that makes her a more consistent and well-put together character but it doesn't make her more interesting to me personally.

And that's before we get into the constant stream of sexual assaults that she is only rarely able to protect herself from even though she's supposed to be one of the best fighters in the Hawks. When we're talking about someone like Wyald or like an army of apostles you can say there's some validity to that, but man did she have to get attacked in the forest after Guts started with the 100 man fight? Like did she have to get sexually assaulted at the one point in the whole golden age that she was too weak to fight properly? I just... gah.

I feel like there is a desire within fandom to kind of massage those things out which is understandable. And most of the Casca fans I personally know are pretty open about changing her from canon because her canon self is frustrating.

BUT I CAN'T DO THAT.

I'm a Super Hardcore Canon Purist. It's just my nature. I can only like characters based on their canon presentation, it's all I'm capable of, and she's incredibly frustrating in canon, so... I struggle with her.

The end.

#ask #anonymous #ariel talks about berserk #i feel like there are people #even people in my “corner” of the fandom #who are going to be like effffyoooooou for this but like #idk what to tell you #also its not the first time ive said this #so

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bluejaysandblackbats · 7 months ago

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Space Oddity

Fandom: DC Comics, Titans (Fab Five)

Summary: Garth grew up in a carnival freakshow, and he never thought about the world outside the glass walls of the Aquarium until a group of kids befriended him. Their love and interest in finding his people might be the key to escaping the silent horrors of his home life at the carnival.

Chapters: 8/?

Characters: Garth of Shayeris, Donna Troy, Wally West, Dick Grayson, Roy Harper, Original Character(s)

Relationships: TBA

Additional Tags: Carnival AU, Developing Friendships, Rescue, 60’s AU, 70’s AU, No Capes AU, Hurt/Comfort, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Lies, Escape, Childhood Memories, Team Bonding, Fish out of Water, Tiny Garth, Beaches, Angst with a Happy Ending, Found Family, Road Trip, First Person POV, POV Garth of Shayeris

Chapter Eight: The Little Mermaid

While Walter cut my hair, I read a book he brought me. “I know it’s a children’s book of fairytales, but there’s a story about a girl from the ocean. She fell—. You should read that one first,” Walter explained as he pointed to the title in the table of contents. “The Little Mermaid”.

I turned to the story and read silently while I listened to the sound of Walter’s scissors near my ears. He turned me around in his spinning chair and lifted my chin with his knuckle. “You’re almost ready for your first shave… You’ve grown up so much,” Walter smiled, “Sorry…”

“It’s alright. I’m on the last page of the story… But, while I’m finishing up, can I ask you something? What do you think I am?” I questioned.

“I don’t know… I’m starting to believe you might be magical. Something that looks human but isn’t… I thought you’d like that story,” Walter replied. I nodded. “Garth, how’s that new trick coming along?”

I shut my eyes and held out my left hand. The water came out of the tank in a long stream, and I fed it into my pool. “It doesn’t take as much concentration now, but I can’t explain how it feels. I can—. It’s like I know where it’s going with my eyes closed. Have you spoken to Roy?” I asked. Walter shook his head.

I hadn’t heard from Roy since that night. I wondered if I scared him off. “He probably went back to school—.”

Someone knocked on the backdoor. “Garth, shake that hair off and hop in your tank,” Walter whispered. I obeyed, watching from behind the glass as he let Roy in. I poked my head out of the tank. “I’ll leave you kids to it. I’ll knock if I see Fisher coming.”

“Thanks, Walter,” Roy replied.

I was so excited that I shot out of the tank and ran into his arms. I hadn’t seen him in weeks. “I didn’t think you were coming back. I read a story about this princess, she was from the ocean like me, and she fell in love, but—. What if I turn into seafoam like—?”

“Hey. Slow down… Sorry, Garth. I took the first flight after school. I’ll be here all weekend, though… And uh—. I talked to Donna—. And—... Well—.” Roy kissed me.

“Huh—. Roy—.”

“Don’t think too much of it. I just—. I think you’re a groovy dude, Garth… And I’d do anything for ya,” Roy smiled, “Wait right here…” Roy ran outside and returned with a record player. I didn’t get to listen to music much, so it always felt special, but something seemed different that night. He put the record on and held his arms out. I cocked my head. “Right… You haven’t—. Do you wanna dance?”

I hugged him, and he chuckled. “Sorry… I don’t know how to—.”

Roy shook his head and took my hands, placing them on his shoulders. He whispered directions of where to step, and once I caught on, I looked up, and we met eyes. I held my breath, and Roy chuckled. “Are you doing this because you feel bad for me?” I asked.

“I respect you too much to pity you, Garth. I’m doing this ‘cause I wanna do it,” Roy replied, “Maybe I—. Maybe I missed you. Maybe I didn’t—. I didn’t know what to do when you—. I get why you like Donna so much. She’s amazing. She’s beautiful, intelligent, compassionate—.”

“You’re not like anyone else. I didn’t like you when we met, but you were so kind that I—. All these feelings snuck up on me,” I interrupted. Roy nodded, taking my hands and spinning me around. “It isn’t strange for you?”

“Nope… It’s the seventies, Garth… And we were friends first. It’s not hard to fall for a friend,” Roy replied, “I talked to Donna for a while. She understood. I didn’t think Donna would. I felt weird explaining, but she said she could understand how I felt… But Donna comes from somewhere where they love different.”

“Walter says there aren’t many people like me in that aspect,” I whispered. Roy ran a finger down my gills, and my ears warmed up. I shut my eyes.

“Does that hurt?” Roy asked in a whisper.

“No,” I replied. Roy leaned forward, and I could feel his lips brush my gills. My breath hitched as I tried to keep my gills from fluttering.

“How about that?” Roy questioned. He kissed my gills and then my throat and my gills on the other side. I pulled away and sat down on the bench. “Sorry, I—.”

“It didn’t hurt… I got dizzy,” I mumbled, “This is happening so fast.”

“Yeah? I can ease up,” Roy replied as he sat beside me. We held hands in silent contemplation.

Almost thirty minutes passed before Roy spoke again. “You’re a lot like Donna,” he whispered.

“You’re kiddin’,” I scoffed.

“She told me—. Well, Donna loved you first. I would’ve been jealous if I didn’t feel the same. I—.” I felt weak and pressed my face into his shoulder. “You okay?”

“I need to take a dip soon,” I mumbled. Roy nodded.

Tears streamed down my cheeks. “What’s wrong?” Roy asked.

“Nothing. I think—. I’m tired,” I replied as I wiped my tears away. “Will you be here tomorrow?”

“Yeah. Of course,” Roy replied. I grabbed his shirt desperately, wanting to be brave enough to reciprocate his affectionate kisses. I knew I wouldn’t know how to kiss him if I tried.

“Do you want to kiss me?” Roy asked. I nodded. “You can kiss me. It’s okay.”

I pecked Roy’s lips, and he chuckled. “Was that wrong? Did I do it wrong?” I asked. Roy leaned forward, parting his lips.

“It’s like a conversation. It’s just—. You just kiss me,” Roy replied. We kissed, and I tried to kiss his neck like he kissed mine. I don’t know if I did it as well as he did.

Roy took his hands and cradled my face, wiping my tears with his thumbs. “Roy, thank you,” I mumbled. He smiled.

“It’s all love, man. You’re loved,” Roy grinned, “Get in your water.”

I nodded and climbed into my tank, watching him leave from behind the glass. “I love you, Roy,” I whispered in the water. I did a backflip in the water and giggled once he left the Aquarium. Walter returned and knocked on the glass. I collected myself before swimming to the surface and looking down from my tank.

“What’d you two kids get up to while I was outside?” Walter questioned.

I could feel myself blushing. “Walter… I won’t turn into seafoam. I’ll be a human. Just you wait!” I shouted before plunging back into the water. It felt like electricity in my body. I hadn’t been that excited since Eunice was alive. Then, it washed away in one quick moment. I resurfaced, frowning as I asked Walter a question. “Eunice isn’t coming back, is she? Dead people don’t come to life again… Do they?”

“No, Garth… I don’t think they do. Do you miss her?” Walter questioned.

“I still want her. I still feel like a baby when I think of her,” I confessed, “She was my comfort. I want to feel that way again.”

“Eunice talked about you all the time. You were her baby. She adored you… Hold onto that,” Walter whispered, “She’d want you to be happy even without her.” That advice stuck with me.

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