#crystal queue

[lovecore-stim]

sensory

[rosenotactuallyquartz]

amethyst & rose

(an analysis on their dynamic)

amethyst & rose have a very fascinating dynamic. amethyst looked up to rose, believing that she made everything better. the feeling was mutual. they never quite knew just how alike they were, but they inspired each other nonetheless.

"rose said i'm perfect the way i am!" — amethyst, crack the whip

“one very important relationship is amethyst with rose, because amethyst is what rose wished she could be." — steven universe podcast, volume 3, episode 1

from the beginning, rose felt a connection to amethyst. there were little pieces of rose’s soul in everyone she loved. from there, she wanted to give them the environment that she never had in her early years.

for example, rose perceived greg as the human version of herself in a lot of ways. their minds worked the same way. garnet & rose connected as gems who shared similar beliefs, and they bonded over their experiences related to love & interpersonal connections—the beauty they saw in things that were considered wrong in the eyes of homeworld’s society. as for pearl… she contrasted rose in many ways, and that made their connection meaningful in its own way, as partners. still, when it came to emotions, they were similar (i.e., how they felt when they wanted to protect something or someone, how they loved, etc. in general, they also felt everything very strongly, so strongly that it hurt them). rose was deeply inspired by her loved ones & often admired the traits & skills that she didn’t share with them. however, the similarities between rose & her loved ones likely played a role in what she wanted to do for them. she wanted everyone to have the environment she never had on homeworld. while there were no rules & freedom for all the crystal gems to be who they are (among other things), rose was very extreme, as sugar states.

"the thing that she really lacks is balance, any ability to temper her extremes. this is part of her character throughout her forms: she's always very extreme." — rebecca sugar, end of an era

“[amethyst] was sheltered from knowing the full truth of her origin & therefore she was not free to build on that aspect of her identity. both the advantages of freedom & the disadvantages of lack of structure manifested in her." — steven universe podcast, volume two, ep two

nevertheless, the way rose revered & loved everyone around her was incredibly sincere & intense. her guilt, self-hatred, & lack of self-acceptance made it hard for her to feel empathy for herself. at the same time, she gave so much care, love, & acceptance to all these little pieces of herself. she never realized just how similar she was to those she loved because she often hid things. to amethyst, rose had all the answers, and every day with her was relaxing, fun, and she felt loved. rose was older than her, the nurturing mom friend who (as amethyst said herself) made everything better. at the same time, it was hard for amethyst to fully understand rose's choices and she never saw a lot of her vulnerabilities.

amethyst & rose were so incredibly similar, & they had no idea just how much they had in common. still, they both knew they were similar. both are playful & young-at-heart. both feel emotions deeply, but they cope with their intensity by trying to make things lighthearted.

they share a sense of wonder that makes them see beauty in the most unusual and odd things—moss, random foods. they probably both brought back the most ridiculous things from missions, much to pearl's dismay.

while rose kept secrets, she also did everything in her power to shield amethyst from anything that might hurt her. because here’s something that pearl + rose have in common: they both want to help so much that it hurts them. they want to prevent harm, to protect those they love & see as precious, but they can’t control everything, & that causes a lot of pain.

"i'm not supposed to be small. and everyone's always acting like there's no problem. you can be anything you want to be. no! i can't. i can't even be the one thing i'm supposed to be, you know?" — amethyst, steven versus amethyst

“rose teaches amethyst: you can be anything you want to be! huge advocate of shapeshifting, self-expression, anarchy—however, amethyst can sense shame from rose and pearl over the kindergarten.” — rebecca sugar, end of an era

literally & figuratively, amethyst and rose both felt smaller compared to the other quartzes and diamonds, respectively. though their situations were different—rose coming from homeworld, & amethyst learning about it later—other quartzes made amethyst feel insecure, powerless, & "wrong," much like rose felt as a diamond. despite this, they both became crystal gems, rebels choosing to be their own individuals, knowing they don’t have to follow homeworld’s rules about their gem’s purpose. they both love living on earth.

"what? you mean about the bad thing? how this bad place is where bad gems came to grow more bad gems? is that what you're talking about?" — amethyst, on the run

"rose's message began to resonate, to pink diamond's dismay. her colony was falling apart. so, like a coward, she called for her diamond allies, yellow & blue, to help." — garnet, your mother and mine

their beliefs also made them ashamed when they looked at their gems. rose, though she became her own person and acted as if the past never happened, still remembered being a diamond.

"i never asked for it to be this way. i never asked to be made!" — amethyst, on the run

"[rose] couldn't stand herself; self-destruction is a huge theme throughout the show—the struggle of the feeling that you shouldn't exist, & what that can do to a person. a lot of the themes of the show exist within rose." — rebecca sugar, end of an era

knowing everything that the diamonds did fueled her self blame & only worsened her feeling that she shouldn’t exist. amethyst feels similarly, and while she became her own person and those around her acted like the kindergarten never happened, she felt like a “big mistake.”

"i’m not going to let you stand there & remind me of everything i hate about myself!" — amethyst, on the run

"[rose] reveres them instead, because they are better than she could ever be, & that reverence is so honest & intoxicating that it draws everyone closer to her, without them understanding the deep self-hatred that pull is coming from." — end of an era, page 88

for a variety of reasons, they both struggle with low self esteem. pink felt insecure around diamonds on homeworld & amethyst felt insecure around quartzes on homeworld, making them feel smaller not just physically but emotionally. they often felt like they needed to change themselves to fit in. they also struggle with the feeling that their closest loved ones are better than them, although the reasons may look a bit different. amethyst knows that garnet, rose, & pearl fought in the war and aren’t from the kindergarten, while rose also feels guilt about where she’s from and feels weak & “bad” compared to the others.

“amethyst finally understands rose... wanting her to shapeshift... not feel obligated to be a quartz... suddenly feels sympathy... kinship. it wasn’t amethyst being inspired by rose. rose was inspired by them!” — end of an era

“the truth is that the people in her life would be so much more understanding than she believes they will be.” — end of an era

“i know you feel bad! believe me, i get it! sometimes it feels like you're never gonna like yourself but it's possible, man!” — amethyst, i am my monster

whenever people ask me what rose needed to do in order to heal, my answer is long & complicated. but i will say, i always include connie’s quote from mindful education. “you have to be honest about how bad it feels so that you can move on!” rose needed to be honest & vulnerable with her loved ones. this includes conversations about the past that she was ashamed of. this is why i never joined the fans who say pearl’s reaction to finding out rose kept secrets from even her was inherently wrong or harmful to rose, as a partner.

i always wished we saw more scenes of rose & amethyst. their dynamic is fascinating, & if rose could see amethyst by the timeline of future, she would understand just how much she could relate to her. opening up was difficult for rose, & for a good reason. revealing secrets she was ashamed of, taking accountability, & apologizing for things would always result in abandonment (isolation) or physical & emotional pain (punishments) during her early life on homeworld, with no positives in the end. hiding must have felt like a necessity for survival, & her fear of being caught by the diamonds worsened her anxiety, making her feel used to always hiding. nevertheless, rose really did contribute to a safe environment for amethyst’s early years & i think that’s incredible.

despite the tragic parts, amethyst & rose had a dynamic that was both close & meaningful. amethyst loved the life she had with rose, & now, she completely understands rose’s actions & everything rose did for her. as for rose, she loved someone who she knew well enough to be able to relate to, on some level. seeing their similarities, even the ones that are as simple as personalities, probably helped rose love herself a bit more.

[idliketobeatree]

dead boy detectives text posts as starboarded (and others) messages from the dead gay detectives server, part 7 part 1 by @nix-nihili ↳ 2, 2.5, 3, 4, 5 mine ↳ 6 _ @hartigays @tragedy-machine @vyther15 @bitterdesert @agentearthling @magpiemarten @aletterinthenameofsanity @datglutengoblin @holvivum @autumn-equinox-04 @shaylogic @qwanderer + logan (pls tell me if i missed someone)

+ bonus for sarah:

[writing-for-life]

Morpheus—Crystal Jade Vaughan

[bebemoon]

look for the name STELLAE (requested by @im-not-good-with-names) | alexander mcqueen by sarah burton pale silver armour-sleeved cage corset dress (s/s 2o19), { beauty } makeup including silver metallic oversized lashes by simone gammino, mugler "angel: silver brilliant star" eau de parfum (in limited edition holiday crystal-studded bottle), colombe d'humieres purple zircon stud earring, iris van herpen leather-bound crystal heel-less heels

[gmanmedias]

💽 💽 💽

🧡 🧡 🧡

💾 💾 💾

[zephyraes]

STIMBOARD - MINI ALICE SAPPHIRE PALM PAL

[ x x x - x 💎 x - x x x ] - [ requested by anon ] > custom requests: dice, gems, fluffy/soft things

tysm anon!!! i actually REALLY LOVE making boards based on plushies :] AND I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKE MY BOARDS!!!! :D

[enygma0710]

Just my thoughts…

When Crystal & Charles are walking, she’s still has her mean girl defenses up and after insulting him, he laughs it off. Even after telling him she’s purposely being mean, it doesn’t phase him and that throws her off. Crystals mean girl persona is a defense mechanism to protect herself and keep others at arm length. That doesn’t dissuade Charles & eventually Edwin and can be argue the beginning of her character growth.

At the end and after she she regains her memories, Crystal realizes with the help of Jenny’s knowledge drop that she can’t run away and to reconcile who she was in the past, she has to accept it to continue her personal growth and surprisingly tells Charles it's because of them. Tbh I was curious how Crystal was going to be compared to the comics and I enjoyed this version of her.

Charle's backstory with his father, wasn't in the comics and was interesting that he deals with it is the exact opposite of Crystal's method. He's a fixer and wants & keeps everyone around them happy and his use of that as a coping mechanism is heartbreaking and sad.

Them calling each other out holding the other accountable helps with their character growth and tbh their friendship.

I could go into Edwin character growth but I've had a soft spot for him since I started reading the comics and I will start rambling.

I've loved the comics for years and tbh I appreciate the show's display of having loving friendship between all the characters which unfortunately you don't see often or people are uncomfortable talking about...

I've rambled on enough...go read the comics and watch the show.

[raincitygirl76]

Survivor's Guilt

I was thinking about what a hypothetical Season 2 of Dead Boy Detectives could look like (if Netflix hadn't bloody cancelled it), and I started thinking about Niko and Crystal. Let's say the crew only get Niko back from the Neitherlands towards the end of S2, and spend a good chunk of S2 thinking Niko is dead and has already moved on to her afterlife.

What about Crystal? We know full well Crystal has self-esteem problems. She thinks she's an awful person, and doesn't distinguish between the awful person she was pre-amnesia, and the caustic but basically good person she becomes after David the Demon stole her memories (and more to the point, after she's removed from the toxic influence of David, her parents, and her so-called friends).

Would Crystal feel guilty that Niko died to save her in 1.08? Yes, I suspect she would. She'd grapple with feeling unworthy of being saved, especially by someone as kind as Niko, someone who deserved to live. Unlike Crystal herself.

I suspect Crystal would feel a boatload of survivor's guilt in S2, and act out as a result. Crystal was the one Esther was aiming at, when Niko rushed in front of Crystal and took the full force of Esther's attack. How could Niko sacrifice herself for someone so unworthy?

Any thoughts?

[liamobrienlove]

Liam in Call of Cthulhu: Shadow of the Crystal Palace (∞)

[lovecore-stim]

sensory

[rosenotactuallyquartz]

“i do it for me”

(pearl analysis; reunited)

since the rebellion, pearl always had this thought at the back of her mind when she fought:

i won’t give up. everything i do, i do it for her.

it only made her feel stronger. pearl feels so much for rose. it was never as simple as just admiration, just dependence, just obsession, just… anything. what pearl feels for rose is strong, powerful, protective, selfless, & genuine. their mutual love lasted thousands of years, surviving countless things, beginning with a war.

throughout the show, pearl has lots of pain from her past & issues that complicate her grief. to overcome these complicated things, it takes time. pearl ultimately opens up to people about things that feel (and in one case, is) impossible to talk about. she has difficult conversations & sees her past a second time, from different perspectives. there are many things she does to heal, process her pain, learn, & grow, but falling out of love with rose is not something she wants to do. but, it’s not something she needs to do.

in reunited, pearl is fighting & she thinks,

i won’t give up. i do it for her, i do it for him.

steven reminds her,

don’t forget about yourself, pearl!

pearl’s response is,

i do it for me.

this is a huge thing for her. two major aspects of pearl’s character is that she is a protector & a caregiver. if anyone’s familiar with enneagram types, she'd be a two. she’s also very passionate, with strong (sometimes overwhelming) emotions, much like rose. so, when she loves, she loves intensely. her protective & caring qualities combined with self worth and self esteem issues. as a result, pearl putting her loved ones first was extreme & harmful to her sometimes. it’s no surprise that this is one of her most significant, ongoing challenges. she spent her early years on homeworld, where all pearls were told they were made to serve someone else. they were referred to as things that were inferior, replaceable. she also felt like the only one who knew enough about the love of her life to truly care for her & keep her safe. she kept rose’s secrets & she knew about her abuse trauma, after all. so, it was easy to forget to protect herself.

it would take time, to start remembering, but eventually, she can confidently say,

i do it for her, i do it for him… i do it for me!

right? no, it’s far more complicated than that.

falling out of love with rose was never part of pearl’s healing. this message would imply that if anyone has issues like low self worth & a tendency to put others first, they must stop loving others and only love themselves.

& that’s a whole other extreme. a very uncomfortable one. pearl + rose are similar in the way that they are both very extreme. this means that their contrasting traits (luckily, they have many!) almost always gave them some balance. but in other areas, they still lacked balance.

when she had lived her entire life up to the war in fight-or-flight, she couldn’t consider this as she fought against homeworld. she was focused on (rose’s) survival, and she would take any extreme measures to prevent her from losing her life. or worse—the diamonds discovering her gem.

as i said, two major aspects of pearl’s character is that she is a protector & a caregiver. but she’s also a fighter! she fights homeworld’s gems, diamonds, homeworld’s powers, the power behind an order, & her own mind. as she works on personal things, she may slip up & need reminders from loved ones. healing isn’t simple or linear, & that’s okay. nevertheless she has fought for balance. the love she has is unlimited: she does not need to love rose any less to love herself. however, what she does need to work towards is remembering to protect & care for herself while she protects & cares for others.

now, she says with certainty,

i do it for her, i do it for him, (and) i do it for me.

[yeetusthemighty]

The creechur

The silly (crazy? I was crazy onc-)

So I got inspired to finally post this guy because of this post by @z4n3jul13n (cool person you should look at their stuff)

full version with my doodles under the cut

(I have a whole au based off of this guy)

[bipocselfship-archive]

2024 Promo!!!

Hello, my fellow self shippers and yumes! Welcome to the BIPOC Self Ship Archive!

For about 3 years now, this blog has been a safe space to highlight the many BIPOC creators and fans in the self ship/yume community.

And for 2024, we hope to continue to make others feel welcome and safe.

Our goal is also to include those in the LGBT+ community as well as those with disabilities, whether physical, mental, sensory, etc. 🏳‍🌈

Disclaimer: Even if you don't fall into any of the forementioned categories, we still highly encourage you to follow and check out all of the amazing creators featured. (Following and interacting with them is also highly encouraged).

If you have any questions, don't hesitate to send us one.

We hope you all have an amazing day, and don't forget no matter who you are, your F/Os love you! Bye!

-Mod Crystal 💖

[transcendragon]

Acegon the Ace Dragon! I really like how one came out. The pale body, dark wings, and glowing crystals are just so cool in these colors. Shout out to the ace flag for being fun to work with.

Stay tuned for aro art tomorrow! My original art made in procreate, image description in alt text.

[bebemoon]

look for the name JESSICA (requested by @disney-eyes) | aniye records peach puff sleeve and skirt corseted mini dress (s/s 2o25), luis de javier white lace tights worn over clear platform heels (s/s 2o25), alexander mcqueen punk stud ear cuff, valentino "club couture" eau de aprfum (bergamot, bitter orange, mandarin orange, fig, orange blossom absolute, orris root, balinese patchouli, cedarwood, musk), versace mini la medusa crystal handbag