#cruelty free my beloved <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[clown-eating-pig]

It’s always so interesting to me to hear everyone talk about which episodes of tma really stuck with them the most. People talking about moments like “the blanket never did anything” or “[EXTENDED SOUNDS OF BRUTAL PIPE MURDER]” or the realization that Jon can suddenly understand other languages. I love learning how many different things affected everyone differently!! :D we are all individuals when it comes to what we fear!!!

I also love that, before I entered the fandom, I 100% expected everyone to have been as uniquely terrified by the giant pig episode as I was and was shocked to realize that that is not the case! 😭

[lxkeee]

UNEXPECTED

—ONESHOT

PAIRING: LUCIFER MORNINGSTAR X FEM! SINNER! READER

GENRE: not angst:)

WARNINGS: no angst fr

NOTES: When I hit a writing slump in one of my series, I try to write one shots to inspire myself:3

We fall in love with three different people in our lifetime.

First love, this love often happens at a young age. You eventually grow apart or call it quits over silly things. When you get older you may look back and think it wasn't love. But the truth is, it was. It was love for what you knew love to be.

Lucifer fell in love with his best friend, Raphael. She was the only one who believed in his silly dreams when he was still in heaven, that's one of the reasons he fell for the seraphim. He didn't tell her, he didn't get the chance to as unfortunately, Raphael told him about her crush on Azrael.

This made him put a distance between them, despite a breaking heart, he played as her wingman and set her and Azrael up.

Lucifer was proud of himself for doing that, he got to see his best friend to be so happy and in love. He can see how good Azrael is treating her and he knows that she'll be in safe hands.

Second love, the hard one. You get hurt in this one. This love teaches us lessons and makes us stronger. This love includes great pain, lies, betrayal, abuse, drama and damage.

But this is the one where we grow. We realize what we love about love and what we don't love about love.

Now we know the difference between good and bad humans. Now we become closed, careful, cautious and considerate.

We know exactly what we want and don't want.

After Azrael and Raphael got married, it wasn't exactly difficult for Lucifer to move on. He saw how happy she is and he decided that he shouldn't dwell on heartbreaking things. He continues to do his wonderful creations for the world. Raphael remained supportive of him, continuing to believe in his dreams despite the elders not believing in him.

Then came Adam and Lilith, he was mesmerized when he saw Lilith when he visited the Garden of Eden.

He fell in love with her and so did she to him, he listened to her how Adam wasn't treating her right. He couldn't believe a woman like her is treated like that.

He talked about her to Raphael and even though the seraphim was happy for him, she warned him not to do anything stupid. He promised that he wouldn't.

The more time he spent with Lilith, they slowly got to know each other.

He and Lilith shared the same beliefs, causing them to give the fruit of forbidden knowledge to Adam's new bride, Eve who gladly accepted.

With that, evil finally found its way to earth. Lucifer and Lilith were both banished into hell for what they had done.

Even though hell was dark, empty, and incredibly hot. He and Lilith managed to make it work. They were madly and deeply in love. Their love bore fruit and that is their beloved daughter, Charlotte Morningstar.

An eternity in hell with his family doesn't seem so bad.

Not all happy things last, slowly his and Lilith's beliefs started to clash once mortal souls slowly came down to hell. Lucifer witnessed the cruelty of mankind, how his actions gave these souls freedom to do incredibly horrifying things.

“This is how they used their free will...?” he asked himself.

He hated it, he lost so much because of the risk he did to give humanity freedom.

Lilith on the other hand, thrived off the evil.

Their differences caused them to split.

He fell into depression, how couldn't he? The woman he loved for so many eons left him? Not only that, his relationship with his daughter is deteriorating. He doesn't even remember when was the last time he held her.

For so many years, he believed that he was unlovable and he was destined to be alone. Why wouldn't he think that when the love of his life, the mother of his daughter left him?

Third love, this one comes blindly. No warning. It creeps on you silently.

You don't go looking for this love.. It comes to you.

You can put up ANY wall you want, it will be broken down. You'll find yourself caring about that person without trying. They look nothing like your usual crush types, but you get lost in their eyes daily. You see beauty in their imperfections. You hide nothing from them. You want marriage and family with them. You thank the universe for them. You truly love them.

It took a while but Lucifer managed to reconnect with his daughter, he promised to be there for her.

He helped her how to get to heaven, he helped her when the extermination happened.

He was proud of himself, promising to help the hotel as he can finally see that his daughter's dreams weren't hopeless. He was filled with hope once more, he wanted to help humanity once more.

It was sudden, no warning. He wasn't even looking for love.

Lucifer found himself staring at the third sinner who joined the hotel, [Y/n]. She joined and he was able to befriend and get to know the sinner.

He showed off his rubber duck collections to her, he thought she would find his hobby silly but turns out she loved it and found it adorable.

It was unexpected.

He suddenly found himself wide awake in his bed at the dead of the night, staring at the ceiling as countless thoughts of [Y/n] filled his mind.

“Uh oh.” he muttered, a realization that he fell for the sinner so suddenly and he fell hard.

He can only think of her bright and sparkly [e/c] eyes, her soft hair, soft skin, her beautiful face, and everything of her.

He groans, “Luciferrrr... you just had to fall for someone so suddenly and that is your friend too.” he groans to himself, mad at himself for falling for someone he thought he could call a friend.

He doesn't want to be friends with her, he wants to be more. He wants to marry her, have a family with her, worship her like the sinner he is.

After coming to the realization, he decided not to confess immediately. Wanting to see how deep his affections for her goes.

And it was deep, it was rock bottom. He was whipped.

He doesn't mind losing himself in the process when he loves her.

He pretended, he hid his feelings. Afraid of losing her.

It took so long, hiding it became unbearable.

He spilled the three words to her, “I like you.” he says so suddenly, he was mesmerized by her that the words came out so suddenly. Catching both him and her off guard.

His eyes widened, slapping a hand over his mouth.

[Y/n] just looked at him with wide eyes, cheeks tinted pink from fluster.

“I-I'm sorry, pretend I didn't say that...” he says, slightly stammering his words. His heart was beating erratically, his hands felt warm against his gloves. His cheeks are warm, warmer than usual. The spots on his cheek have reddened more than usual, almost glowing red.

He covered his face with his hand, embarrassed.

He was expecting that she would be gone once he removed his hands away from his face.

He felt his hand being held by soft ones, removing them from his face.

“Lucifer, look at me.” she says softly to him, he looked at her shyly and with embarrassment. His red eyes finally met [e/c] ones. He admired how beautiful she looked.

Her eyes were looking at him with so much adoration, cheeks flushed, and she was shyly smiling at him.

“Did you mean what you said?” she asked softly, hope evident in her voice.

He gulped nervously but decided to nod at her, a slow shy nod.

He could see how her eyes sparkled, her smile got bigger.

“I'm glad... I like you too, Lucifer.” she admitted softly to him, her voice devoid of any lies and only filled with honesty.

His eyes widened, his cheeks getting warmer.

“Why...? What's something about me to love?” he asked her sadly, avoiding her eyes. He is happy she felt the same but he genuinely can't see himself deserving of love.

“There's nothing about you that I couldn't love, I love everything about you... Lucifer.” she admitted softly, holding his hand with hers.

His breath got caught in his throat, his heart beating erratically against his ribcage.

“I am hard to love.” he says softly, ashamed. He squeezed her hand gently.

“Who said that?” she asked softly.

“Me.”

Her eyes softened, her other hand caressed his cheek adoringly, “Well, you're wrong. I can love you just as easily as breathing.”

Speechless, embarrassed, and flustered. He's not used to such affectionate words said to him.

“Huh...?”

“I meant it.” she says softly, leaning closer to him, “Can I kiss you...?” she asked and he forgot to breathe.

“Y-yes, please...”

Soft lips pressed against his, his eyes closed instinctively as his hand found its way to her waist, pulling her closer to him.

They'll be fine. He'll be fine. He has her now.

GENERAL TAGLIST:

@adaizel @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx @thedarkkitten @selvyyr @froggybich @brithedemonspawn @kottenox @totallymitya @many-fandoms-lover @dou-dou @mezzyb0nb0n @n1chxyaaenthusiast @cherry-4200 @koirb @galaxyj3lly @crystalplays28 @luleck @scootinonyourmom @rory-cakes @mixplara @crescent-z @bitchyzombienacho @kalisha2004 @altervex @nehy019 @napbatata @kouyoumarryme @kooidoom @yukichan67 @apple-pop @akiralovespenguins @storydays @amphiroxx @lil-writer-523 @punching-pentagrams @moonlovers34 @akiqvq @the-attention-whore @homie-xidal @nicora04 @knave-hearts @emekeneme @chirp23 @wendds @crazed-flower @your-next-daydream @rocketxgirl @tobe-a-smiley @purplerose291 @ritzes28

[certainlynotasimp]

Hii, i think a good idea for a one shot could be that there's a canon event where the spiderperson!reader have to do the iconic Spiderman kiss in their universe, like Spiderman 3 (toby's one) with Gwen stacy or whoever you want, but they are in a relationship with Miguel LMAOOO btw im sorry if there's something wrong with the grammar, english is not my first language <3

Rewrite the Stars

((Miguel O’Hara x Female! Reader))

A/N: A non Sunny x Miggy post? How odd for me lol. I’m so sorry this is super late and to everyone whose requested, I’m working slowly but surely on y’all’s stuff. If you wanna read some stuff in the meantime, here’s the Masterlist and feel free to join my discord.

A/N: I tried doing the you/yours pronoun thing because this isn’t a Sunny fanfic but I really don’t like it lol.

Warnings: Jealous Miguel?, Unrequited/Forbidden? Love, Female Reader/Female Pronouns, Barely use of Y/N, and no Spanish this time ((I’m trying to find a new translator and hopefully an editor))

The universe.

One of life’s greatest mysteries. A mass of stars and galaxies that housed so many lives within its many pockets. The lives of so many people whose lives were already written within its cloudy arms and their ends cemented in its pools of nothingness.

A beautiful cycle of cruelty and destiny.

A cycle that was the reason for your utter misery as you sat at a bar listening to your dimension’s Ben Riley blabber on about some football game you cared nothing about.

His oblivious brown eyes sparkled at the fascination with the game as his dimpled smile accentuates his sharp jawline. The warm lights from above caused a healthy glow to bounce off of his shaggy blonde hair, almost making him look like an angel. You can see why Spiderverse assigned him as your love interest.

In your earth’s canon, you were a typical woman who had gotten bit by a radioactive spider during a high school field trip and you spent your entire high school experience thrashing goons instead of chasing boys. Even helped take down some aliens with the Fantastic Four and the Avengers at times before college finals. Spiderwoman was New York’s beloved hero and the cockiness of being its one and only SpiderWoman quickly got into her head.

That was until six months ago.

Six months ago, you were fighting the Vulture over the Empire State Building when another, more mutated version of the same villain appeared. They both decided in your state of delirium over the doubles that you would be a good plaything.

~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey, I didn’t ask for a combo with my chicken!” A feminine spider’s voice screeches as she avoids the hooked talons of the erratic variant.

The two villains took turns flying menacingly around the scope of buildings to throw the hero off of their location while the other swooped in and tries to rip her throat out.

As she attempts to escape the feathered monster, its companion would come and slice away the web of salvation, continuing the vicious cycle.

Blood blinded her vision as the loud ringing at the base of her skull grew louder. The causes of that annoying alarm grasp their razor claws into her shoulders before sweeping her exhausted body into the air with a victorious snarl.

‘I guess this is the end…’

As the heavens draw closer to her doom, her life hanging up by the slicing of her muscles and bones, a glimmer of fate happens. The warmth of a flash barely registers as the first ache disappears with a startled squeak and a burly force. The sudden change in feeling takes her breath away as she suddenly begins to plummet below.

Her eyes quickly adjusting to the suffocating drop, she can see that one of the Vultures was now fighting an even more prominent blue figure, his howls of pain and unintelligible cursing heard from the stumbling brawl.

As the flash from her familiar foe reaches around the building, she shoots her web at him and used him as a glider.

“Time to ground you, birdie!” She yells as she throws the villain through a window. Catching her grip on the building, she looks at her new foe in the sky and the wind is knocked out of her from the sight.

The man who saved her was in a futuristic spider suit with his mask now off. His dark hair flutters in the wind as the setting sun makes his tanned skin glow. His red eyes glare at the wiggling mutant as his full lips pull back into a snarl. His jaws open revealing a set of large fans before he plunged them into the mutant.

Who the hell is that?

~~~~~~~~~

“(Y/N)?…” Ben frowns as he realizes his date was lost in her thoughts.

You snapped out of your head and fake an apologetic smile. “Sorry, I was remembering something….”

That wasn’t a complete lie. You remembered the day you met Miguel O’Hara. The Spiderman of the year 2099 and the leader of the inter-dimensional Spider Society. The anomaly that had come into your world had brought the two together and you were recruited due to your stubbornness, much to Miguel’s annoyance.

~~~~~~~~~

“No.” His annoyance dripped from these words as he glares down at you. You were caught in wonder at the idea of there being other Spidermen and that they worked together to stop the collapse of the entire universe. The thought seemed too good to be true that you just had to ask if you could join until those red eyes shot your dream through the heart.

“What do you mean ‘No’?” You ask in disbelief. Your own eyes glared deep into his soul as your hands balled into fists. “I’m a Spiderman just like you! How could you-!”

“You are not like me.” He coldly snaps at you, your ranting briefly interrupted as the man towers over you. His clawed hand grasps your face as his glare sets a spark of fury down in your chest.

“You will never be like me and you will never-!” “Is that our new recruit?” A smooth British accent appears behind Miguel as a spiked-headed Spiderman peeks around his bulking figure.

“No, she’s-” The tall punk pulls you away from Miguel with a mischievous laugh as he introduces himself. “Ello, love, my name is Hobie. Hobie Brown.” He leans down with a sly smirk as his mischievous attitude infests your being like a plague. “Just play along, mate. Let’s riffle this wanker’s undies.” He whispers as you giggle.

“Nice to meet you, Hobie.” I allow a sly smirk to slide onto my face as I look back at the now very annoyed Miguel. “My name is (Y/N) and I’m happy to join.”

~~~~~~~~

The distant sound of screams filters through the bar as the distinct sound of a car being tossed into another building.

Looking at my gizmo disguised as a watch, you realized that the canon event was starting.

~~~~~~~~

“You did well today,” Miguel admits under his breath. Looking at him in shock, you realize that he wasn’t scowling like he normally was. He had a softer expression, his eyes shining with approval as his lips quirked into a mimic of a smile.

The mission had almost gone rouge with the escape of a prowler and him hiding low in a crowded dimension. Despite the obvious danger, Miguel opted to go alone like usual, but his lack of spider sense caused him to get caught up in a trap. Talons and Fangs don’t really help if you can’t exactly move around to use them, so he ended up taking serious blows.

Luckily, you managed to get there and tumble with the villain long enough for the others to rescue Miguel, and the team managed to recapture the prowler. Of course all of them looked pretty bad injuries wise, but the look Miguel had as you sat there bandaging up his wounds made it worth it for some odd reason.

“Thanks Boss.”

~~~~~~~~

June 27th : SpiderWoman of Earth 648 will rescue love interest, Ben Riley, from an attack against The Rhino….

The roaring of the mechanical beast fills the panicked screams of the patrons as the sinking feeling falls in your chest. Ben is quick to play the hero like any guy would as he grabs your arm and drags you out towards the emergency exit. Just like the timeline said it would.

You use the chaos to your advantage as you pretend to trip and get lost in the crowd of people struggling to escape from the emergency exit.

~~~~~~~~~

“What do you mean by that?!” I snapped at an irritated Miguel.

Lyla was surprisingly quiet as she watched the duo argue. Miguel whips around at you as his ruby eyes scorched into yours. His talons point at you accusingly as he reiterates your next canon event.

“On June 27th, you are going to be out on a date with Ben Riley. The Rhino is gonna attack that street and you’re gonna save everyone, and afterwards you’re gonna have to kiss him.” His frustration evident as his permanent frown creases.

You stare into his eyes in defiance as you coldly utter, “No. I’m not gonna kiss Ben Riley.”

“And why not? He’s your love interest!” Miguel exclaims, obviously more furious than before. “You’re the Peter to his MJ. You gotta kiss him because you’re destined to be.”

“I don’t love him! I don’t even like his whiny ass!” You snap as you felt your frustrated tears roll down your face.

It’s true. Before you joined this team, you would have been thrilled that you were destined to be with Campus Hunk Ben Riley. He was everything you could ever want from a guy. He was good looking, sensitive, athletic, and social able. The all around good guy you would be proud to bring home to your folks.

But…

Sharp grasp on your shoulder alerts your attention back to Miguel as he slams you back against the desk. His eyes burning embers as he glares down at you.

~~~~~~~~~~

Changing into your spidersuit, you began to fight The Rhino with a distracted daze in your movements.

The memory from a week prior burning in your mind as you sloppily avoided cars and harsh blows. After a few well timed flips and back kicks, the brute decides to throw a large street cleaning truck towards the alleyway. Just like Lyla predicted when she handed you the file.

The Rhino is gonna throw a street cleaner towards the alleyway where Ben is. SpiderWoman will stop the truck before impact and sling it back towards The Rhino ending the fight.

~~~~~~~

“And why is it that you are being so difficult?!” He snaps as his fangs glimmer from his scowl. A cute trait you used to love about him until it was pointed at you. “You are no better than a spoiled child with how you are acting so you better have a good fucking reason!”

You growl back at him with a tear rolling down your enraged face.

He had no right to argue with you about your life, not when he’s the one making it difficult.

~~~~~~~

Shooting a web out towards the buildings, you catapulted yourself into the air and landed in front of the truck. Quickly reusing the web with some enforcements, the truck was bounced back to the The Rhino. The enormous foe gets trampled by the machinery as the crowd cheers for SpiderWoman’s dreaded victory.

“Way to go SpiderWoman!!” A familiar voice joins the crowd as I see Ben on the ground, obviously he either tripped or fell back to avoid the truck. You offer a hand towards him as you thank him softly.

“Thank you.” I faked the smile in my voice as the crowd disappears, leaving the two of you in the alley way.

~~~~~

Finally snapping at him, you yell out in fury,

“BECAUSE HE’S NOT YOU!”

With a frustrated slap to Miguel’s face, you run past him and escaped back to your dimension, heartbroken over how the events to come and what just happened that despite everything you couldn’t change fate.

No matter how many times you fell asleep during long nights talking on his observation deck. No matter how many playful sparring matches turn into flirty comments. Not even the little gestures of bringing the grumpy spider his coffee and him bringing you some sweets during meetings could change that the star already written your path.

You fell in love with a man who isn’t meant to be yours.

~~~~~

It’s been a week since that fight and you still haven’t seen or heard from him. It hurt to know that your confession was brushed aside while you had to continue the continuity. You half at least expected him to be here to make sure you at least followed through with the canon event.

“Would you like a swing home?” I offer just like I’m supposed to. The moment that was meant to be a nervous beginning to a love story felt like the beginning of heartache as I watched a blush form on his face.

“Sure,” he answered before a flash of realization that his date was suddenly not with him. Another trait you wouldn’t have noticed if you were as in love with him as you were suppose to be.

“Hey my date isn’t here…I think she got hurt or lost during the panic.” His concern caused a pang of guilt to stab her in the chest.

Recovering quickly, you shoot out some webbing and playfully hang upside down infront of him. “Well I guess that swinging date will have to be postponed.”

“Wait it was gonna be a-!”

Quickly, you pulled down the mask enough to deliver a quick peck to his rambling mouth. You force out a giggle as he stood looking at you flabbergasted.

“See ya, Riley.” You swing off as the man bumbled to even ask how you knew his name.

Lyla just said it was a kiss, not a what kind of kiss.

With a heavy heart, you swing back home as you tried to remember that this was all for the sake of the canon. That Miguel didn’t care for you the way you did for him. You tried your hardest to tell your aching heart that those past few months were you just making too much out of nothing.

You mournfully entered your apartment through the bathroom window you normally kept unlocked . You stripped away the skin tight fabric before wrapping yourself in the familiar comfort of your robe as you exited the room into a dim lit living room.

You heart stick in your chest as you see Miguel standing there in your living room in his bright blue spider suit and a beautiful spring lily in his hand.

“Miguel? What are you doing here?…” You ask as yoy warily approach him, scared he’s gonna do something to you.

He shakes his head, refusing to answer as he hands you the flower. It’s soft white petals shining in the pale moonlight as you smile fondly at it. They were your favorite flower. Something you told Miguel a million times before.

Before you could thank him for the kind gesture, a soft thump above you alrets you to look up. A spindle of glowing webbing cascaded down the ceiling with the large spiderman now suspended upside down from it. His free hand caresses the side of your face as his eyes stared softly into yours.

“I can’t change the canon, mi amor…” he whispers sadly before mischief lights up his molten gaze. “But we certainly can try to rewrite the stars for us.”

An excited nod from you causes his chest to rumble as he pulls you into a slow passionate kiss.

You were glad this is a canon event for spider men despite it not going as planned.

[vampirefest]

Dear companions in darkness, the wait is finally over! We'd like to thank everyone who participated in our little guessing game, we got a lot of interesting answers.

For the month of November, we bring you a fun low-pressure bingo inspired by Lestat, that you can fill up at your leisure throughout the month.

You can use the prompts on the bingo card to write fanfics, make fanart, amvs, edits or any other creative outlet to show your appreciation for our beloved Brat Prince.

You can find the rules and guidelines for the event here. The link to the collection can be found here.

Don't forget to tag with #vflestatbirthdaybingo and/or tag us at @vampirefest so that we can find your posts.

Here is the complete bingo card for our birthday boy!

You can find the full detailed prompts below the cut.

Happy Lestat Month!

1. "My lord, the Wolfkiller": The killing of the wolves, a moment that comes to define Lestat for all eternity. You can explore this fundamental event in Lestat's life, the way it altered the course of his life and his family dynamics, and the symbolism it came to represent in Lestat's later life.

2. First love I The witches' place: For Nickistat lovers out there, this is your time to shine! It's also a chance to explore another formative moment of Lestat's life—his experience at the witches' place—when Lestat came to the fundamental understanding that there is no meaning in the end - not to the cruelty, not to the laws of men - all that exists is the one life he's living and the aesthetic of it all.

3. The performer: Actor | Rockstar: Performing is Lestat's second nature, either to present an image of himself to others to earn their love, or to hide this true self. From the time he is a young man, Lestat is awed by actors and artists, they create worlds and life out of nothingness. Some of Lestat's best and happiest moments are on the stage, acting or singing for his adoring public.

4. Rue Royale era: For decades, 1132 Rue Royale was the home of our favourite little vampire family. A family that, according to Lestat, shouldn't have lasted as long as it did. Here you can explore the dynamics between the unholy family, between Lestat and Louis, and the highs and lows of this period in Lestat's life. As Lestat said, he has never been as happy as in that little house on Rue Royale.

5. Free Space: This is your chance to explore any themes or moments in our brat prince's life outside of the prompts proposed. Let your creativity run wild!

6. "I don't like myself, you know.! love myself, of course. I'm devoted to myself till my dying day. But I don't like myself.": Use this prompt to explore Lestat's insecurities and his complicated relationship with himself, from his abandonment issues to his reflections on his body, his monstrosity and so much more.

7. Lust for life: Here you can explore Lestat the dreamer, Lestat the hedonist, Lestat the embodiment of hunger. He has a lust for blood, love, adventure, for a better life filled with more excitement and lived to the fullest. Lestat takes what he wants and follows his every whim.

8. Resilience: Lestat is the metaphorical cockroach of the Vampire Chronicles universe. Whatever life throws at him, he rolls with the punches and finds a way to survive and make the best of every situation. He always finds a way to reinvent himself and to keep moving forward. With this prompt, you can explore Lestat's defiance in the face of obstacles and his resilience even under the worst circumstances.

9. The Brat Prince | Prince Lestat era: Set your creations in the Prince Lestat era or simply explore Lestat's bratty nature that earned him the moniker "The Brat Prince".

[lynxmuse]

Mindfulness Moment

It may be surprising to be able to pull a powerful philosophical moment/insight from within a Marvel movie… but it’s awesome that this was the level of care and intent brought to the writing here!  (Spoiler warning for Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3)

“There are the hands that made us, and then there are the hands that guide the hands.

My Beloved Racoon.  The story’s been yours all along, you just didn’t know it.”

– Lylla

This is such a powerful and moving inflection point for Rocket.   Until this moment of luminosity, he was allowing himself to be defined by the High Evolutionary.  His whole life, his whole existence, his very sense of self, all of it was being hemmed in by what the HE had said (and done).

More than said, really… for the young Rocket, it was what the HE had decreed.  Right before Lylla provides him with this key, Rocket even protests the notion that he could have any purpose in life other than what the HE had declared.  The H.E. stated X, that was the truth, and Rocket could, therefore, be no more than that.

But in the space she created by granting Rocket absolution for her (and Teefs and Floor’s death), Lylla provides Rocket with the true key that releases him from his cage.  In Rocket’s past there is tragedy.   There is pain.  And there is callous cruelty by his caretaker.  But he doesn’t need to be defined by that.  He doesn’t need to be defined by the HE, or the HE’s intentions, or the HE’s actions.  He doesn’t need to be defined by any of that.

It is his story.  He gets to write it.  He gets to choose.

In that moment, Rocket gains freedom.  Freedom to let go of the guilt he’s been carrying, freedom from the constraints he let the past and the HE impose on him, and, ultimately, the freedom to be.  And with that he may move forward into the future, creating as he goes, and free once more to express the authentic love and heart he has for others.

*   As I mentioned before, it’s also a great culmination of Rocket’s arc told throughout his MCU appearances.

** I’ve seen some chatter that poo pooed Lyla’s second line about it being Rocket’s story as some sort of smirking hint by the director on how all the movies have really been about Rocket (and not Quill, etc).   Which, on a secondary level, it might well be.  But I think it erroneous to divorce it from the whole of Lyla’s dialogue and not see it as a continuation of the hands line that comes before it.

[iluvuiloumi]

Kafka's Metamorphosis: My Ramblings

Hello world (Luna)! Since I got this account like...2 days ago, I'm just gonna post whatever insane ramblings I have in my brain into here, and that's all that is necessary for me.

I finished Metamorphosis this morning, and knowing not only how he saw himself, but also how he saw his father:

"You never hanged me, but I always felt the rope around my neck"

In all honesty, I saw this quote attributed to Kafka's writing, but I cannot find the quote itself so please take this with a grain of salt. However, the quote still applies to the book itself.

Ramblings:

Turned into a bug, Samsa's first thought when he transforms is not about him. In fact, never — not for more than 2 or 3 instances for which he is almost instantly punished — does he think about himself. Rather, his every thought, his life, and his existence seem to be consumed by his family.

He lives for his family. He breathes for them. But in his essence, what is he, if not for his family? Now, he must know. He must know because he has no family any longer. He's a vermin hiding inside a house that was no longer his the second he was not the perfect son, although he paid for it.

Even as a bug, he thinks of his family. Completely starved for any kind of human treatment for himself, he still hides underneath a blanket for his sister's comfort.

And yet, he hopes, silently, that she would move it and look upon him with the adoration she used to have for her brother. But she doesn't.

She treats him like he is dead, and feels guilty about it. That is why she empties his room like one would a missing or gone relative. She believes her life is ruined by his transformation, more than his. She is who matters because she retains her human form. In fact, that is why she doesn't let the mother clean the room.

She doesn't want to treat his room or him as something that should be cared for because she knows she does not care for him. When her mother tries to, it proves the neglect that she has been showing him. She cannot be confronted, just like her father couldn't, with the truth that their beloved.

Samsa is almost immediately resigned to his fate. He aches and longs for communication with the only ones he loves. He aches for belonging, so much so that he is willing to live with the torture of the room as long as he can see that it is his own. He aches for communication.

But he cannot bother his family. He cannot do it. So he screams silently.

They clear his room, and he only asks for a single painting to remain.

They leave him scraps that he returns untouched, only hoping that they notice his starvation

They leave the door slightly ajar while refusing to engage in conversation with him, and he stays in the shadows to not horrify them with his appearance.

His father tries to kill him, and he stays on the floor to not scare him further.

He hides in silence under a blanket to prevent his sister from witnessing what she considers disgusting.

His sister's music plays and is not fully appreciated his only thought is to protect her and play for who would truly appreciate her — him — but only through her free will.

He wakes up as a cockroach and though he describes the pain as debilitating, he still tries to force himself to work for his family.

However, his family only thinks of their own. No longer human, Samsa was no longer their concern. If he could not be a part of the family as a human, he could no longer be a part of the family at all. But they cannot admit to themselves the cruelty of their actions in their pursuit of freedom.

Samsa did not have the privilege of a job he enjoyed for his family.

Samsa observed the world with the innocent eyes of an observer.

"Was he an animal if the music could captivate him so?"

No, Gregor Samsa. You were the one with the most humanity of them all.

[cafeleningrad]

Hi !

For His Dark Materials (the first 3 books) : ❤💖

For anything : 💛💚🤍💔🏳️‍🌈💀

Hey thanks for the ask. ^^ Moreso for taking your time off while you're dealing with the flooding for something so trivial. I wish you a lot of good luck reworking the house, and on your next IKEA-endeavour. (No seriously, my very best wishes to you!)

His Dark Materials ❤ Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom? Since I have barely interacted with the fandom, I couldn't tell you to whom this might apply. That said I'm of the very strong opinion that Pullmann did his world and a characters a huge disservice by writing "the Secret Commonwealth", betraying a very poetic end.

💖 What is your biggest unpopular opinion about the series? Pullman is just a bit too much in love with Lyra. Don't get me wrong, I love her too but her maturing in "the Amber Spyglass" sometimes feels more like something that needs to happen. Suddenly Lyra doesn't feel like acting like her usual. Even though her encounter with the harpies challenging her and letting her grow is quiet organic but other instances felt out of the blue. Also the fact that the grand prophecy of her betrayal is a betrayal of herself, and then even is rewarded by having a witch's ability of separating long distance from Pan... Anything bad she could ever do is lessened into a lecture, she never could do any bad herself, or face any darkness within herself whereas Will is often put in situations in which he has to question his morality. And now in every spin-off Lyra is an extra special little thing, beloved by everyone she meets, getting breastfed by a fae, she's part of yet another prophecy after the mainstory etc. Everyone is supposed to love Lyra as much as Pullman does. It all feel likes like Lyra is never really allowed to do wrong. She does face cruelty and darkness but never really in herself. She might be a cheeky, impertinent child but ultimately she can never do actually wrong. I hope it makes sense but I have the impression Pullman's favouritism and focus sometimes blurs out the world around her.

Now you just gave me free license to rant along. ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

💛: What is a popular ship you just can't get behind, and why? Gosh darn, I recently watched shows/read books that only five other people on this website blog about, soooo...

[Pachinko] Koh Hansu/Kim Sunja Oh I know Lee Min-Ho is handsome, and fandom loves the hot mafia/monster/yakuza boyfriend but since the novel/show deals with very real history it is obvious how doomed and impossible their relationship was - especially due to who Koh is. Don't get me wrong: The circumstances as to why he is how and who is are more than sympathetic. However He can never shake off his egoism. The worst thing is, he never changes - even if he regrets how badly things turned out. Sunja, rightfully, points out that she can not be a mistress, loosing her entire reputation and family. Hansu never considers that her marrying Isak was her only chance to keep a semblance of dignity, social standing, and relation to her family within Korean society. Instead Hansu takes Sunja's pragmatic decision as a personal slight. No matter how much he loves Sunja and Noa, and will also protect her extended family, he will always think of them as part of him. Every generous act of helping is tied to the expectation of getting rewarded by love or service. By bringing Sunja's mother to Japan he hopes Sunja would suddenly stop mourning the recently deceased Isak, and she would thrust herself and her family into his arms. (Even though he still wouldn't offer her an official marriage because business marriage arrangement comes first.) He graciously pays for Noa's university but reveals that it was always tied to his expectation to do what Hansu wants.

What personally rubs me the wrong way with this ship is the idea that there could be a happy ending for them. It overlooks that Hansu is fundamentally unable to outgrow his greed, and old trauma for the love of others. Trauma, remembrance, and frank coversation about unsolved injustice are important - that's the entire point of the book/show. However the sacrifice of others for one's persona spite cost Hansu his luck with Sunja, his son, and his relationship to his daughters. He could never be satisfied with a simple life surrounded by family and daily happiness like Sunja

💚What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character? Hmmm, I can't think of one right off the spot however I have the impression fandom in general is recently not dealing well with stories not wanting to be didactic. To say when stories about the complication of human interaction deal with things that just go badly because it's human nature to be faliable, learning to do better etc. - then audiences still weirdly want a resolution who really is at fault, who was more wrong... and oofff. I guess this is how we get really annoying discourse by the fact that many audience members these days can't live with ambiguity and mistakes. So it leaves me at "Yeah the character did all that but I couldn't care less it they pass a Calvinist qualification test.".

🤍: Which character is not as morally bad as everyone else seems to think? [FE3H] Archbishop Rhea/Seiros Alright, alright, I just finished all four routes two weeks ago, and FE3H five years after it'e release is like re-brewing old instant coffee... But I think the two fundamental issues in this fandom, or better, the reason why there's such a heated discourse about Edelgard is a) the fandom's misogyny b) actually not enjoying tragedy. Rhea herself is a character who is (purposefully) hard to read. Even in her support dialogues we at best learn something about Jeralt but usually Rhea is more interested in how Byleth behaves as Sothis' vessel. the entire reason why the continent of Foádlan is the way it is all comes back to her, her mental state after killing Nemesis, her fears, her wishes, why the Crest system exists in the first place. From what I read over the course of the years of finishing all routes (+ Ashen Wolves) Rhea is not intentionally cruel, genuine in her regret (to the point it causes her breakdown in Silver Snow) but simultaneously distrustful, lonely, secretive, and stuck in her grief. Rhea is compelling because she's simultaneously immovable object and immovable force. I say the fandom is misogynistic because in so many previous Fire Emblem games women are rarely the driving forces of the plot - and if they are never with such layered personality or grace of moral ambiguity (*coughs* Echoes *coughs*). Rhea is nor a sinister schemer even though she bears a lot of responsibility why Foádlan is the way it is. It's extra annoying when some fans are deadly allergic to the central theme of systematic violence (class oppression of non-nobles, female characters very often treated as means of Crest reproduction instead of... human beings, feeing racism and colonialism), and Rhea indeed using military force and intimidation to maintain the status quo. People who can only like a female character when she's a sweet wronged waifu are weak. End of debate.

By all means, I think Rhea is a good character because she can indeed be vengeful, and wields institutional power for what she perceives as greater good (which her foil Edelgard does as well). Rhea isn't a poor girl who did nothing wrong and Edelgard isn't being edgy. And no, problems can't be easily solved by Edelgard bringing forwrad a formal complaint and everyone happily goes after the Agarthans. Rhea is still afraid of the Agarthans. Revealing them to the world would mean revealing the existence of the Nabateans, which she fears would motivate humans to go full Nemesis once more. Ans also, Rhea is stuck onto the idea that the world needs Sothis divine guidance. She's not only missing her mother - to Rhea Sothis is her idea of salvation and ultimate peace. Until Sothis' ressurection Rhea will keep the world in stasis. Just one more experiment, and the world could finally be saved. Hence why she is unwilling to reform the Church and along it's reformation of a class system that is based on Eugenic (those who have Crests and those who don't). Even though Crests are slowly waning in even old bloodlines, any efforts of reformation and protest against the class system or individuals affected by eugenic mistreatment are met with violence of the theocratic militia. The system that needs dire reformation isn't reforming (by Rhea's will) which we see happening during the entire White Clouds section, so counterefforts are growing more violent. And disregarding Rhea's stasis, disregarding the theme of systematic violence leads to a very bad reading of both central characters Edelgard and Rhea and also a bad reading of the plot over all. But again, I don't think she's evil, she thinks she acts for the greater good. And she isn't necessarily delusional either. But as long living Nabaean with powers much grander than any human's, her priorities are different. It's debatable whether or not it was a good idea of hers to shoulder the weight of the world onto her shoulder (although such would mean that no plot would happen) but then again, the Agarthans would hunt down the last of the Nabateans and also not shy away from attacking the humans Sothis cared so much about. When Seiros decided to lead the continent under Sohtis' love for humanity, Seiros was lonely, the majority of her family dead, and the rest either too exhausted to go on, or going into hiding. She was lonely, and had none to share her fears and anger with, none would understand her. All these emotions are responsible why the Church of Seiros is as ruthless as it is but at the time and going on it makes sense for Rhea. There lies the main conflict between Rhea and Edelgard: Rhea has a very paternalistic understanding how to lead humanity whereas Edelgard is very much convinced that humanity is capable of making it's own decisions. At least when no superimposing power promises even more power, riches, and land. So that superimposing power ought to be removed.

Last but not least, it's inaccurate that Rhea created evil human experiments. Even though Ashen Wolves does bring extra material which is critical of the Church of Seiros as institution, the Apostates are either Nabatean-blood infused people of the first generation, Nabateans themselves. Their resurrection attempt did not involve humans, and Rhea stopped that resurrection attempt directly after it went wrong. Alferic brought his transformation upon himself. Also Sitri and her predecessors are homunculi who... are not humans. Even Byleth in only half human due to Jeralt being the only human parent, and even he has Rhea's blood granting him eternal youth, and a long life span...

💔 If you had to remove one major character from the series, who would you choose? [Sopranos] Alright, he dies anyway but after the brilliant episode 3x16, Christopher Moltisanti really grated my nerves at times

🏳️‍🌈 Which character who is commonly headcanoned as queer doesn't seem queer to you? [ASOIAF] Asha Greyjoy. I've nothing against ships but it's so weird how fandom can't handle the idea of straight butch girls. It is a general tumblr problem that working against patriarchal concepts of gender roles could only be possible when a girl is lesbian, and not a brains washed bi straight passing, or, god beware, a braindwashed striaght woman. :/ Also Sansa Stark. My girl has a massive crush on a disfigured guy but her standom is weirdly allergic to her beauty and the beast theme.

💀 If you had to choose one major character to die, who would you choose? Phew... even though I might not like a character, many good stories know exactly how to use each character ideally in a plot. To say, even terrible characters are necessary for a well written conflict. [ASOIAF] But just for shits and giggles, Jon Snow lying dead would bring massive disarray to the fandom, the fandom bros, and ending a lot of stupid ship wars.

[hiraethwa]

HEY AVE!! IM HERE TO MATCH UR FREAK;PPPP

ok first off let me just AAAAAAAA ok and let me UAHIUFDHSHJFLUHAEGFKUUF because you match my angst freak SO WELL like dare i say you might like it even more heart wrenching than me because at least I GIVE THEM HAPPY ENDINGS:( i do eat up every single fic you post though because whenever I see your notification pop up with a new fic i just KNOW im about to eat GOOD (and cry a little but that's besides the point)

i also adore the way that you describe internal turmoil like whenever i read an internal monologue, or a metaphor that you've crafted, i feel like IM the one going through it and it genuinely gets me riled up which is possible the BEST THING you could do with writing!! so in love with OSD and to be loved and i rember reading dancing with your ghost on the subway and having to BITE MYSELF so i didn't start tweaking out RHHEHRWHHGWR

thank you for enduring my senseless cruelties towards your beloved characters and thank you for letting me crack the WORST jokes and also thank you for all the satosugu in my inbox i will be savouring them over and over and over and thank you for always matching my freak<3

-ash/hatssun:)

thank you for matching my freak! please feel free to ask me to match your freak as well heheheh

ASHA EXCUSE ME WHAT IS THIS ACCUSATION

SINCE WHEN DO I NOT GIVE THEM HAPPY ENDINGS DON'T GO AROUND SPREADING LIES!!!

not you tweaking out on the subway i'm dying from laughter omggggg WHAAAAT HAHAAHHAHA i am so glad you find my angst delectable enough for you <333 when i write the inner turmoil and monologue, man it HURTS me even 😮‍💨 i try my best to make it angsty ✨

you're welcome bb <33 always!! i enjoy the senseless cruelties thank you for always letting me bounce ideas off of you it's very fun when either of us do it !!

match my freak! askbox event

[fwwm]

HIIII :DDDD

heehee some of these are Silly but do whichever ones you want!!!!

Serpico: 7 (lol)

Delano (in or out of kayfabe): 5, 9

any of The Thems: 30, 33, 34

MW: 17, 28

Seprico:

7. favorite animal? Why?

…

Delano (in kayfabe!):

5. how do they typically dress? does their wardrobe lean more towards practicality or aesthetics?

All black, silver, and neon or dark blue. He wears a lot of leather and spandex pants. He has his little bra thing but I think he’s also a fan of crop tops, both with sleeves and without. Knee high black boots!!! He has semi functional knee and elbow armor. I think he would be down to wear actual leg plate armor. He has a bunch random studded belts and silver chains. Finally he has his bayonetta glasses :3. I think there’s probably just a bunch of random wires on his glasses and his clothes (and inside of him) at any random time. The funny thing is I don’t think he actually thinks about what he’s wearing ever. Like the Computer turned him into big tough guy and now he just kinda spawns in at places looking like That.

9. favorite food? least favorite? are they a picky eater? do they have any dietary restrictions?

I mean he’s a Computer so I’m not sure if he can eat. He would probably chew on wires in a weird cannibalistic sex ritual way.

TWINK:

30. do they smell like anything notable?

Roses because I’ve been watching too much Utena. Possibly chemicals depending on when you find him.

33.

Ohhhhhh okay.

Love Interest sees him like she sees the skyscrapers in east Deisoph. Beautiful, clean, shining, a promise of something better, impossible, and most of all, untouchable. She literally views Twink as a statue of what he could be rather than what he is. All of his kindness and cruelty towards her might as well been the judgement of God. There are times maybe when the barrier between them fades, and for a moment they act like childhood friends (equals) rather than a prince and his knight. But always one of them breaks this illusion before the other can, and they once more resume their roles.

Boy. Boy simultaneously sees him as both the worst of the slums of west deisoph, and the best of the east. I think boy very much has a primal sort of jealousy towards twink. Boy feels like twink has something he lacks and desperately wants. (he is lacking something. He found it a ditch. He doesn’t want it.) is it intelligence? Is it status? Is it wealth? I don’t think so. Twink is in some ways a god to deisoph. Boy wants that, he wants people to recognize him as such. Boy hates twink for being a false prophet, and loves him for being a prophet at all. Twink is both great and terrible indeed .

Girl see through him. Or at she thinks she does. Sometimes. Girl sees the filth in Twink because she was born in it. She knows there a ditch (or moreso a bottomless hole) inside of him where something important (something human) should be. She wants this Twink DEAD!!!!!…… But for real she hates him. So much. But her hatred towards Twink might be one of the few times she doubts herself? Is there something so *wrong* with him? Or is it just that he taking away her literal other half? Does she hate him because Boy is looking for something in him that’s in her. Idk.

I’m not sure how this turned into a Twink = Deisoph thing but *wrench watch dogs 2 voice* arent we *all* Deisoph when you really think about it?

34. how would your character describe themselves? it doesn't have to line up with how they really are.

He has surpassed being self aware. He literally does not think about himself ever because, in his mind, he does not exist in the context of other people. Everything is him. He is everything. There may be hiccups along the way, but everything will succumb to his will eventually. He’s goal oriented, always looking ahead. I don’t think he will ever be satisfied until Deisoph is a reflection of his face in a pond.

MASKED WITCH MY BELOVED:

17. how’d they spend her free time as a kid?

Alexa play “when will my life begin” from tangled. She did all of that stuff.

28. Affection stuff (too lazy to copy and paste)

Very stiff. You will get a head tilt and a very stiff hug. The snakes will lick and hug (more like strangle but they have good intentions) u tho.

[sol-consort]

Oh sorry I didn't know if I came off as aggressive or negative I sincerely didn't mean to:[ with my dyslexia I have a hard time wording and I tend to avoid sending asks out of anxiety and embarrassment of not writing right.. again I'm sorry I came across as weird I really didn't mean to :[

But to explain myself again I didn't know to to word it right I am curious as to why headcanon the asari as parasitic your reasoning behind it and stuff since I don't think I've heard a headcanon like that before :[ again sorry for the bother

The original headcanon post is self-explanatory. It goes into depth about the reasons behind their parasitic nature, even comparing them to a parasitic species of birds. There is really nothing more for me to say to make my reasons any clearer, I'll just be repeating the original post if I attempt to explain it again.

The parasite thing was never ment to be an insult or hate for asari—I didn't like the ask someone sent after it completely trashtalking them—I think the asari are cool and their parasitic nature is a very neat and unique survival strategy. I adore the asari, I wanted to explore their darker side because nature is brutal at its core, because I don't like the "sugar and everything nice" surface impression people have on them.

Also it's very hypocritical of people to hate the asari for these reasons yet give a free pass to the krogans' animal cruelty, Hanar taking drell children to build their army with, Turians making a military bootcamp mandatory for all of their children, etc.

Humans aren't saints either, homophobia and misogyny are human inventions that aren't present in any other alien species besides our own.

It was a character study of the less talked about aspects of the asari. Not everything in that post was headcanons. A lot of it were canon events and facts taken from the Mass Effect index.

Only the conclusion that they are parasitic is the headcanon. Not all parasites are harmful either, asari offer a mutually beneficial symbiotic relationship with the species they exploit...sometimes. Other times, they fully take advantage of them: see Vorcha.

The "grudge" thing is just a joke, a bit I do because I'm salty about them thinking they're inherently superior when it was only thanks to the protheans uplifting that they became what they are. But that's not their fault. It's asari government propaganda. And if it would've happened to the humans instead, we would've done the exact same thing, if not more severely, because of our egos.

It also begs the question, how did they survive before meeting other aliens? Did they just accept the negative side effects that come from two asari parents? Were they always parasitic, or is it a side effect from the protheans meddling with their DNA to give them natural biotics? Is it a constant exposure to element zero that made having children with each other so risky?

They need other species to thrive, even their economy prospers on the exploiting of more poor and uneducated species, their biology alters your perspective on reality to view them as the ideal attractive mate, they trick your brain into seeing them as appealing. That's a parasite.

However, asari remain my beloveds <3 So do krogans, salarians, and other species. Because they're not real, they're tools to tell a story, intricate imaginary cultures, and worlds.

-

I read wrong into your intentions in that ask, I'm sorry, you won't believe the amount of people that come into my inbox just to argue over small details or things that I wrote which didn't align to their preference. People who legit get angry over these videogames, lacking the ability to tell fiction apart from reality, or to separate their subjective perspective from canon.

However, in the future, if you see something I've written you don't like, just scroll. It's not meant for you. I don't always want to explain my line of thinking.

And even if I do, most of the time, you won't like my answer or find it satisfactory because you came into this discussion with preset ideas and opinions. You didn't ask this because you genuinely found the idea of a parasite asari fascinating. You asked this because you found it disheartening and assumed I held a real grudge, that this was out of malice to your favourite species. It's the same as the person who took the HC post as an invitation to come talk shit about asari in my inbox, just the opposite extreme, both are weird things to do.

Wouldn't you prefer to talk to me about something you actually liked in my writing? Ask me to expand on a subject you deemed interesting and fun rather than this uncomfortable situation for both of us?

I'd prefer that, too.

[myfakecandyy]

Areo Lore 101 + Some Art

Areo, My Drow Wizard/Cleric of Eiliestraee with an insane god complex and attachment issues. Both art by me <3!

When I started getting invested in Dungeons & Dragons, I needed to familiarise myself with the Lore, worldbuilding and races in the Forgotten Realms setting. So, to experiment, I came up with the rough idea of my Wizard Areo. I did not have a clear picture of who I wanted to create. Still, I knew I wanted to play someone with a memorable and fun roleplay personality, so I gave her a holier-then-thou god complex; she was created to be someone who believed she was immortal and so took unnecessary risks with a delusional sense of safety. Before I ever got to play her in a tabletop setting, Baldurs Gate 3 came out, and I was very excited to play as I grew up playing the Baldurs Gate spin-off games Dark Alliance 1 & 2, coupled with the exciting and positive things I saw online I bought the game pretty quickly. To expand on Areo and learn more about the Lore, I made my Tav Areo, and she's grown into such a beloved OC to me.

Actual Lore under the cut! [Possible Spoilers]

Early Life: Areo was born and grew up in the Drow city Menzoberranzan; for those unfamiliar with the setting, it's a large city in the Underdark(Underground of Faerun). Her upbringing was vastly different from most of the city. This is because Menzoberranzan is built and run by devout followers of the Chaotic Evil Goddess of Drow Lolth, Queen of Spiders, while Areo's mother, Miz'ri, was a follower and Priestess of Eiliestraee, the Chaotic Good Goddess of Drow. It is important to note that Eiliestraee and Lolth oppose each other morally, ideally and narratively.

Lolth: To explain the Lore surrounding Lolth, she is essentially a tyrant. She thrives in cruelty, encouraging her followers to kill each other to prove themselves worthy of her fickle favour, enjoying manipulating them into servitude, only to then toy with them anyway. She demands questionless loyalty and devotion; it is no wonder her people are known for their backstabbing, power-hungry tenacity. It was illegal to worship any deity besides her in the city; treachery almost guaranteed death.

Eiliestraee: Eiliestraee is the daughter of Lolth and lives to stand against her mother's ways. She is the Drow Goddess of Freedom, Dance and Song for all those who wish to return to the surface world and be free of Lolth's grasp. She is a joyful mother-like goddess who strives to inspire the Drow and stand as a beacon of hope.

To continue, Miz'ri wished to spread the word and beliefs of Eiliestraee, helping shepherd many of the lower-class citizens of Menzoberranzan into better lives on the surface world, the journey of which was highly treacherous and dangerous. This was something that kept many Drow from leaving. However, Miz'ri was an extremely powerful Cleric of amazing faith and magic. Areo spent her childhood beside her, and the small group of followers she amassed became her family. This rag-tag group of Drow worked secretly for the first 11 years of her life, dodging the threats of the city surrounding them.

It was in the year she turned 12 that things changed. Her mother, who held so much love and affection for the world and people around her, was methodically corrupted and converted by Lolth, an established master at manipulation. On one long expedition to the surface world, just as they had almost broken the surface, Miz'ri turned on the clergy she created, slaughtering the innocents she once led to freedom, leaving nothing behind but a pile of gore. As is Lolth's will to all that turn their back on her. Areo lived to be the only survivor. The effects of this event then altered her perception of reality and life.

Areo didn't survive due to the mercy of her mother. If you asked her to recall how she survived, she would be unable to tell the truth, her mind betraying her. I will break the events into two paragraphs: What Areo thought happened and compare it to what actually happened?

Delusion: In her memories, Areo cannot recall much of that day beyond a haze of religious imagery and flashes of light. She saw herself outside her body receiving a divine blessing from her deity of unbreakable protection. Shortly after, the beautiful form of Eilistraee manifests in front of her to use her divine magic to end her mother's tormented destruction and free her soul.

Reality: Her mother came for her life last; perhaps she had a semblance of her old self alive, urging her to spare her baby, but she was cold and without mercy in her final moments. It was pure luck and timing that Areo managed to kill her mother before she killed her; it was a quick and straightforward burst of magic in a moment of panic that managed to catch Miz'ri off guard enough to pierce her heart fatally.

Areos's memory was heavily clouded by trauma and a childlike way of rationalising things, and so her developed survivor guilt manifested oddly. Being a weak child seeing all these people around her die, she couldn't understand why she was the lone survivor, and so while searching for an answer as to why, her brain jumped to incorrect conclusions. In this case, her thought process was, "I didn't die? Even though I should have? That must mean I'm Immortal and blessed by the gods(In her case, Eiliestraee); that's the only reason that explains how I got to live while others didn't." This, of course, drastically changed her worldview.

Growing up, these delusions only elevated and reinforced themselves deep into her brain; every near-death experience, every lucky instance in her life, and every victory in combat only made her believe this more, especially with the increasingly heavy risks she began taking. Indeed, it is all incorrect, and she has survived this far solely on luck, her cunning and wit.

Some old art from when I was first developing this storyline. There are a few inconsistencies as I have changed the Lore and her design by now, but the vibes remain similar:

Young child: Very shortly after the massacre, Areo aimlessly wandered around the shallows of the Underdark. She was starving and injured from the renowned harshness of the area. Once again, luck comes to her aid when a kind older wizard passes her way. He had been scouring the land for different plants and fungi to use in his brews and alchemy when he noticed the pure black eyes of a young girl watching him from afar. He knew she would have died had he not taken her in, so for the next part of her life, she lived in a tower taught magic by this man she became quite fond of.

Early Adulthood: In his old age, that kind of wizard died a peaceful death in Areo's 15th year. She was consumed by an intense grief, finding herself alone once again. In her mind, she cursed her "immortality", a curse to outlive all she came to care for, and so, in anger and sadness, she resigned herself to live a life of solitude in the tower forever. There was more at play. However, she was also so terrified. She had never left the building alone, and much of the surface world did see Drow kindly, but even then, the fear dug deeper in her head. Even approaching the door to left her paralysed her mentally. Her life up to this point had taken a massive toll on her mental health. It was a mental block she could never get past.

For 60 years of chronic isolation, she read the thousands of books her mentor had collected in his long life, many of which were books passed from his master and so on. The collection of multiple generations' worth of arcane knowledge and study kept her mind nourished but her body weak. Her options for food were limited by her inability to leave the building. For 60 years, her growing adolescent body feasted on inhumane amounts of food, the leaves from decorative plants, ants that crawled along the walls, moss growing on the ceiling and worse. Her extreme malnutrition had drastic effects on her body that are, at this point, irreversible.

This explains her cannon base Dnd Stats at 75 years old (BG3 Timeline). Strength 4, Dexterity 6, Constitution 2, Intelligence 18, Wisdom 14, Charisma 12

Baldurs Gate 3: In accordance with the game lore, Areo was at some point abducted from the tower by Mindflayers and infected with a Mindflayer Tadpole. It is safe to assume she would never have left that place otherwise and would be starving in that tower for many more years.

The first art I had drawn of her after starting Bg3:

[lotim]

Erudition: Snarl of Ibrahim - Chapter 1 (80 verses)

1 • Much cruelty is justified with the gift of heaven or jannah.

2 • Before I can rebuke what people rationalize for the sake of immaterial salvation, let me point to you how much of a curse this supposed gift would even be.

3 • Heaven or jannah should supposedly be a realm of infinite good. Why is it so easy to ignore that “infinite good” is an oxymoron?

4 • Forgetting, for a moment, the impossibility of objective goodness, imagine “infinite good” in a way that matches subjective humanistic ideals of good.

5 • Does no Christian nor Muslim ponder the meaning of deep time?

6 • After hundreds of trillions of years of monotony, the same mindless worship for timespan exceeding generations of red dwarf stars, you have still only met the first blink of the forever to come.

7 • Sweet friend, will you not be exhausted, of all that is good, by then?

8 • You become sick of sweet desserts in less than a week when you eat them repeatedly. What makes you think the high feasts of a supposed heaven will not sicken you in a short while?

9 • Many Ibrahiris (Christians and Muslims) say to me that Yahweh will simply make it not so. They will not be bored because their “omnipotent” god will change how they feel.

10 • So at what point did mind control become acceptable? Of course, the Ibrahiris practice mind control in this Dunya because Yahweh sets the example for them in heaven!

11 • My dear, if, to endure infinity, your sense of self must be pulled apart at the seams and rearranged how Yahweh sees fit, is it really you who is in heaven?

12 • And please, do not tell me you can endure infinity as is, when you cannot even conceptualize it.

13 • You cannot conceive of the infinite moments between now and the end of this sentence. You cannot fathom the infinite numbers between 1 and 2.

14 • And I ask a pious person, one of the nearly 4.5 billion affected by these thieving theologies…

15 • If you go to heaven now as a Christian, or to jannah as a Muslim, along with your child, who is believing. Are you not worried for your disbelieving spouse and other child, who deconverted in secrecy?

16 • Or let us presume you know an openly non-Ibrahiri, whether they be a Hindu, atheist, Jain, or a member of any number of beliefs who you believe is not going to heaven. When you enter heaven or jannah and you don't see them there, what will you think?

17 • Will the sorrow of your separation from them follow you into this supposed perfect afterlife? Will you see your child with you there, and be overcome with the grief of their other parent and sibling who did not enter?

18 • Be reminded that the Bible and Qur'an say heaven is without sorrow.

19 • If the sorrow should melt away, in order to align with the Ibrahic literature, who melted it? Was it Yahweh who felt so emboldened to, yet again, edit your mind and perception in the manner he saw fit?

20 • Miathema, how can you say that you have free will under these circumstances? Are you even the one in heaven at all?

21 • Will you peer down into the lake of fire and be gleeful that your family is being punished? I hope you will deny such a thing, lest you worship something more grotesque than any demon.

22 • At what point of forced change and manipulation have you transformed into someone you are not? I will answer for you; verily, it is near the start of mind control that you lose yourself.

23 • More disfortunate than mind control survivors here in Dunya, you are offered no time in which to reinvent yourself after such manipulation. Your theology dictates that you will be a puppet eternally.

24 • I understand the need for anti-truths. Is it not easier, when a beloved dies, or worse, a beloved who had no chance to live life, such as a child, dies, that you will see them again in heaven?

25 • Be reminded that once one of their own loved ones do not make it to jannah, it is them in the position of either robotic sorrowlessness, or bearing the eternal pain of conscious separation for their loved ones.

26 • To believe in heaven or jannah, is to torture oneself, and to internally inflict that torture on one's beloved. Of course, the average Ibrahiri doesn't think that far. Not for lack of capability, but because of heavy conditioning, if not programming, to be unquestioning.

27 • For a moment, remove the cloth of conditioning from your head, and think freshly. I will ask you a third time. Is it you who goes to heaven?

28 • All of the things you enjoy, and care about, is it not because of deep bonds? Is it not because of novelty?

29 • Your personal customs and hobbies, why do you enjoy them? You will see it is because of the learning process.

30 • To enjoy the fruits of mastery, you must once have been a junior. To be a junior means to accept the sorrows, however small, of failure, and overcome them.

31 • Is it not that there are no sorrows in heaven or jannah?

32 • With no sorrow to accommodate the concept of failure, how do you become a master? With no sorrow to inform the essence of a mistake, how do you know that you can progress from your shortfalls?

33 • The essence of personal custom involves progression, even if mastery is not the goal. A child playing with blocks does not know they can become an engineer. But rarely will you see them stagnate in their understanding of how toy blocks work.

34 • With no frustration to drive the child to do better, to keep their block tower standing a little longer, forever will the blocks remain parallel to the ground.

35 • The child who goes to heaven stagnates, and is robbed of their childhood in the process.

36 • In effect of you being human, you enjoy progression, no matter how small. It is not in your custom to stay bored.

37 • So who is it that goes to heaven? Such a being is very inhuman indeed.

38 • And should you say that the point of heaven is to transcend humanity, why do you want to go there? The person up there who shares your appearance and your name would not be like you at all.

39 • Your humanity is what makes you, yourself in the first place. Indeed, consciousness rests in the brain, which deteriorates in the soil on Earth (HL) in the first place. Your consciousness does not go to heaven (if it existed), and for that you should be grateful.

40 • The hypothetical transcendent, when they enter heaven, what are their rewards there? Gold? Jewels? A mansion? Why do these material things matter?

41 • The descriptions of heaven or jannah would indicate that some humanity rests with your afterlife self in the first place. If it did not, you would not value these things.

42 • It is only because rubies resemble patterns of sweet fruit, a health benefit, that we seek rubies out, and every shiny thing by extension. Gold can glisten like clean water, something we need for our prosperity.

43 • Study neuropsychology, and you will understand that every psychological phenomena is ultimately biological. The same biology that exalts gold is the same biology that exalts hobbies, yet heaven promises one but robs the other.

44 • Notice that, in my teardown of jannah, I did not present any hard evidence that heaven does not exist. But in fact, evidence was not needed.

45 • Aside, it is not possible to prove something does not exist, unless there is evidence of its logical contrary, which immaterial things tend to not have. Only things can be proven to exist, or be unproven entirely.

46 • If I must accept Christianity or Islam as real because I cannot prove its theology's nonexistence, then surely you will accept twenty-headed winged horses because you cannot prove their nonexistence?

47 • Anyways, I do not need hard evidence that heaven or jannah does not exist, purely because it is already logically invalid.

48 • Working through the illogics of Ibrahic theology is like doing mathematics. Variable x cannot be the answer if every answer from x is bullshit.

49 • Indeed, it disturbs me further that one's reward in heaven or jannah is described on a tier list. The more holy a believer, or the longer they have been believing, or the more good works they have done, the higher heaven they receive.

50 • So, if heaven is sorrowless, how is it possible that one can be disturbed by their lack of a greater gift? And if there is no disturbance or dissatisfaction, what is the incentive to receive a higher heaven in the first place?

51 • Most Ibrahiris do not believe you will progress in heaven to taste better rewards. If you could, then it necessitates the sorrow of dissatisfaction, as well as implying heaven is not a realm of perfection, as you could yet be more perfect than another, or than your past self.

52 • And since you do not progress, you are stuck with one set of gifts, forever. A reward that will soon become a punishment, if you are anything more complex than a mindless robot.

53 • When you are tired of such monotony, miathema, will you leave heaven? If you do, it was not perfect, and if you can't, it is slavery.

54 • If I tell you now that I “love” my children so much that they are locked in my house, where they sit in front of my feet and sing my praises, surely you will call the authorities, and chastize me for enslaving my children for my own egotistical self centeredness. Why is it suddenly different when Yahweh does it?

55 • If being in Yahweh's presence is supposedly so amazing that no one would want to leave, or would want to do something other than sing his praises, why does he not present himself to everyone in this Dunya? Rarely will you find another such deity who demands worship and interaction from everyone, without presenting themself.

56 • Why is it that we must nebulously choose him, without two-way communication, or we must choose him in advance of communication? If he knows his presence would cause us all to worship him, and our worship is what he wants, why not appear to us all?

57 • If you should say it is because it would interrupt our free will, then you accept the free will of those in heaven is too, interrupted.

58 • Why should free will be so essential for the 80 to 120-ish years you spend on Earth (HL) but be irrelevant in heaven, where you are supposedly spending eternity? Indeed, your life in Dunya is nothing in respect to infinity. It is not even a sneeze in comparison.

59 • If there is no free will in heaven or jannah, and humanity is concurrently happy with it, does that not mean it was in fact possible, all this time, for Yahweh to create a realm where we had the feeling of freeness, or the lack of desire for it, without actually providing freeness?

60 • Does this not beg the question, why are we free in Dunya (if Yahweh supposedly created it)?

61 • It either means we are free, unnecessarily, and Yahweh knew the suffering this would bring as he is supposedly omniscient. Or, we are not free, but our version of unfreeness still allows unconscionable suffering to millions worldwide.

62 • Why?

63 • Is Yahweh not supposedly all good? Is he not supposedly all powerful? If he's both of these things at once, he can emulate free will to us, and allow us all the benefits of that gift, with none of the drawbacks.

64 • It's not an impossibility for him, since he does it with heaven.

65 • Our free will, anyways, is not truly free under Ibrahim (Christianity or Islam) because the religions seek to manipulate us based on what is or isn't good. We are not free to gravitate to Yahweh's law based on a connection to him, but rather a fear of the consequences if we do not.

66 • Yet the most palatable result, heaven, is still at its best, grotesque.

67 • If worship of Yahweh was based on an understanding of what is good, and Yahweh providing rubric around those good things, the gifts of heaven or jannah would not appeal to us.

68 • If in Dunya we should be chaste, why is it that heaven promises the most beautiful slaves for us to have sex with?

69 • Why, in jannah, does every disallowed thing become allowed? Why is wine wanted in the first place? Why should we become tall?

70 • All these things appeal to primal desires, behaviours of the flesh.

71 • It becomes exceedingly clear that heaven or jannah is not about glory, but to justify the intense sacrifice here on Earth (HL).

72 • The authors of Christianity and the artists of Islam said to themselves, “what will convince people (especially men) to give up their very lives for the religion?” And the answer was to promise them worldly rewards, things that would delight their dopamine receptors.

73 • Receptors that will rot in the ground or be burned in a crematorium upon death; useless once a person takes their last breath.

74 • What is the reason for these delights?

75 • What is the use in sacrificing one's only material life for the immaterial? What is the use in submitting the guaranteed to the whim of the powerful to be given the unguaranteed in return?

76 • If I took a loan worth a country's aggregate wealth, and told the bank that I would repay them ten times over in jannah, they would slap me in the face right there.

77 • You cannot trade the material for the immaterial, or vice versa.

78 • Miathema, what if there is nothing beyond the grave? What is your piety for if not to improve the life on Earth (HL) for you and the others here?

79 • Do not waste your one, precious life on the demands of rich bishops and grand imams. Live your material life for the material world.

80 • If a life beyond exists, and it is worthy, it will reward you greatly for the good you do in this life.

[hughungrybear]

Thai BL Favourites List Tag Game

Why would you inflict this torture and cruelty on me, @lost-my-sanity1 😭😭😭😭

Favourite BL:

I said it before and I'll say it again, SOTUS holds a very special place in my heart. Say what you want about the storyline, plot, and actors (although, I will have your head if you come for my beloved Singto). I truly believed that the Thai BL landscape changed remarkably (for the better) when GMMTV released SOTUS in 2016. If you have been watching BLs as long as I have, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.

[Image source: Icvr)

Favourite pairing:

Pat and Pran (OhmNanon) have revived something in me that I thought died with so many underwhelming BLs that had gone before them lol (hello, BBS Episodes 4 and 5) 😅 Although MLC's Heart and Li Ming (GeminiFourth) also had me in a chokehold.

More underrated actor:

Sing Harit. If you don't believe me, just look at his very extensive filmography. Also, Slam Dance, The Revenge, and Not Me. Enough said lol

(Image Source: My Drama List)

Favourite character:

In a Thai BL? Again, @lost-my-sanity1, just why???? Have I offended you in some way? Well, if you really must know then Sun (Chimon Wachirawit) from My Dear Loser: Edge of 17. Look, the way that Sun just accepted the fact that he'll never be number one - not with his family or with his beloved In (who sends Sun mixed signals every chance he gets, played by Pluem Purim), sends me into a downward spiral.

(Image source: Pinterest)

Another character that I love is Oh-aew (played by the ultra-talented PP Krit) from I Told Sunset About You. I'm just soft for characters who are oblivious that they are in a toxic relationship, okay? 😅

Favourite side character:

Definitely Pearmai (Aye Sarunchana) from Be My Favorite. Look, it has been a staple in a Thai BL to have (cis) female villains who are caught in a love triangle with one of the main characters (looking at you, Plern Pleng/Aim Satida of Together with Me). She admits she's not perfect and also cries when she found out that Kawi and Pisaeng are a thing. However, she didn't let it affect her friendship with the two. She even turn down Not's not-so-subtle invitation to be an effing rebound guy ("I'm disappointed, not desperate" will be forever etched in my mind).

Favourite scene:

I have so many. I can't just pick one 😭😭😭😭

Favourite line:

Have I talked about the script from Tale of a Thousand Stars? Because I really need to talk about how each effing episode is a nugget made of quotable quotes (For Pete's sake, from the very beginning, Torfun's "Where we are happy, we are home" sends tears to my eyes).

Most anticipated bl and why:

Only Friends because Jojo Tichakorn. Also, have you seen 3 Will Be Free???

Healthiest relationship in a bl:

PatPran. No explanations are necessary.

Most toxic relationship in a bl:

LOL. Where there is MAME anywhere near the writing and production crew, there is guaranteed toxicity in the plot (and not in a good, entertaining way — more like "you should have gotten a restraining order yesterday").

Guilty pleasure series:

I have to admit that I have watched 2 Moons 2 an embarrassing amount of times when there was basically only 2gether The Series in my semi-decent BL list.

Bonus! Most underrated series:

Dark Blue Kiss. I do not get all the hate TayNew has gotten over the years, but really the Kiss Me, Kiss Me Again, and Dark Blue Kiss were all worth watching simply because you can see how Pete and Kao grew as a couple.

(Image source: Pinterest)

Also, 3 Will Be Free deserves more YouTube views.

That's it. That's the post.

And since misery loves company, I'm tagging @dribs-and-drabbles, @telomeke, @ellasaru12, and whoever wants to undergo the same torture as I did when answering these questions lol

[shizuokadivision]

Gangsta’s Paradise (Renegade Solo)

Lyrics by @uenodivision <3

Bring the Beat!

[Sakura:]

Silent Tragedy

I am Renegade

[Chorus:]

We resort to brute force

To get our own justice

There’s no place for Chuohku here

I’ll pump it up across the whole damn city

Gotta take a stance

Hypnosis Microphone

We resort to brute force

To get our own justice

There’s no place for Chuohku here

The wind follows behind my shoulders

Shizuoka Division

[Sakura:]

Wannabes strut like they're tough, playin' a dangerous game

Tryin' step into my world? You can't handle the flame

One mistake, they're on their knees, begging and pleading

'Cause real power's in my hands, I am the queen

Wannabes strut like they're tough, playin' a dangerous game

Tryin' step into my world? You can't handle the flame

One mistake, they're on their knees, begging and pleading

'Cause real power's in my hands, I am the queen

Shizuoka's under lock, key in my hand, I'm the law

No rebellion tolerated, I crush dissent without a flaw

The suits may think they rule, but my reign will never pause

I'm the shadow puppeteer, in this city without cause

Try to cross me or mine, you'll find there's no remedy

My will is iron, my rule is final, I declare with certainty

Cross the line, you'll meet your fuckin' fate, it's no hyperbole

Feel the wrath of me and mine, we are Silent Tragedy!

[Chorus:]

We resort to brute force

To get our own justice

There’s no place for Chuohku here

I’ll pump it up across the whole damn city

Gotta take a stance

Hypnosis Microphone

We resort to brute force

To get our own justice

There’s no place for Chuohku here

The wind follows behind my shoulders

Shizuoka Division

[Sakura:]

This life's a vigilant grind, no room for the weak

Watch your back, guard your turf, silence the traitor's speak

Underlings plot, but I reign supreme, they can't compete

Real gangsters can't last, in my world, they face defeat

This life's a vigilant grind, no room for the weak

Watch your back, guard your turf, silence the traitor's speak

Underlings plot, but I reign supreme, they can't compete

Real gangsters can't last, in my world, they face defeat

A childhood marred by torment, under a tyrant's cruel sky

Daily hell, a soul tested, but from the ashes, I did fly

To my "beloved" family, your cruelty was the key

It forged the iron in my soul, set my destiny free

Enemies, hear my words, cross me and your family will cry

I got a bullet with a name on it; all you bitches can die!

I rule with an iron fist, my vengeance, swift and sly

And remember: I always tell the truth. Even when I do lie!

[Chorus:]

We resort to brute force

To get our own justice

There’s no place for Chuohku here

I’ll pump it up across the whole damn city

Gotta take a stance

Hypnosis Microphone

We resort to brute force

To get our own justice

There’s no place for Chuohku here

The wind follows behind my shoulders

Shizuoka Division

[coffee-in-veins]

Day 29: Festival

an entry for darkest prompts promptober 2022  

previous days: 1, 2, 3,  4, 5, 6,  7,  8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28

now available on ao3 too

Festival NOUN - a day or period of celebration, typically for religious reasons; an organized series of concerts, plays, or films, typically one held annually in the same place.

* * *

My lover's got humour She's the giggle at a funeral Knows everybody's disapproval I should've worshipped her sooner

-- Take me to church by Hozier

There was no surprise, Dismas supposed, that the Glorious And Blessed And Most Certainly Not Corrupt Church Of Holy And Divine Light was an organization fucked up to its very core. And he was saying that not only because a structure so widespread was inevitably corrupt and fucked up. Hell, he’d say for the most part at least they’ve played pretend well enough and used a lot of gilding to hide their real affairs. Most people genuinely saw them as benign – even those who worked there. Church devotees somehow managed to either turn a blind eye or even justify all of the completely messed up atrocities their beloved Church committed.

And commit cruelty the Church did! Like human trafficking disguised as finding gifted kids. Or self-torture which was proclaimed as the true path to righteousness. Or ban on food in those few merry months when getting it wasn’t as infuriatingly hard as it was at other times. Or forcing its most devoted lunatics to wake up in the middle of the night to praise the Light which wasn’t even fucking there for at least five more hours. Or any other things which made even bloodthirsty ex-brigand cock a disbelieving brow because what the actual fuck, how is any of this can be alright, Reynauld.

He was thinking this not only because he had the unfortunate experience of working in big voracious groups, and could tell countless tales of how any group which got any real power became fucked up quickly enough. One could argue that happened because he was only working with scum and mercenaries. Dismas could shrug in turn that it wasn’t rogues who invented indulgence. However, mostly he deduced that by being forced to work together with zealots and seeing how the glitter inevitably fell away each time their resolve was tested and failed, revealing tormented, broken people in places of former living saints.

But if there was one thing where even godless highwayman had to admit that the Church knew how to use to sell itself to the masses, it was the festivals it held for the devotees and “silly lost heavens” alike. No expense was too great, to extravagance too opulent, and if it was created by the free labour of its followers, so be it. Even in the forgotten backwaters of Hamlet, church celebrations were a captivating thing of beauty and carefully planted hope.

All Saints Day was no different.

Maybe it was the candles, white and pristine, and not offending his senses for once. Maybe it was the procession, sweet-smelling with frankincense which Dismas inevitably started associating with safety. Maybe it was the rare glimpse of optimism on people’s faces.

However, most likely it was the fact that Reynauld found his white holiday garments and was proudly wearing the new crest. There was an odd satisfaction in the highwayman’s chest when he had seen it – or the subtle yet obvious change in the other man’s posture, in the way the knight held himself. That made the cut spent on ordering the crest so much worth it and made the holiday actually bearable.

“Ready?” Reynauld turned to him, radiating against the sunset seeping into the room. Dismas just huffed with a half-shrug and scratched his unusually shaved chin which felt unpleasantly naked. On top of that, he had bothered to find a clean shirt – mostly because Rey tricked him beforehand and his favourite one was still wet. Still, that should’ve accounted for something.

Apparently, it was enough, since the crusader grabbed their candles and hurried outside to join his flock, babbling happily about The Forerunners of the Light, but made sure to include some of the spicier tales of the saints to keep Dismas entertained. A most welcome precaution, albeit an unneeded one – the rogue was surprising himself by simply enjoying the time they were spending together. The candles drew intricate glowing patterns on Rey’s chiselled face and hearing his voice being so uncharacteristically happy was a treat on its own. Despite hot droplets of wax falling on his fingers and the overall church nonsense around, the ex-brigand was content to be there.

That was, before they met the Abbot.

Because Reynauld immediately rushed to His Holiness, leaving him behind, and Dismas’ good mood burst like a soap bubble.

Sure, “I’ll be right back,” the other man said.

“Just stay here,” the knight threw over his shoulder as he was sprinting away.

“Don’t let the candlelight die,” he reminded the rogue, already from afar.

It was almost poetic that the next gust of wind left rogue’s candle with but a whiff of smoke coming from the glowing wick – but then again, maybe he was merely self-sabotaging as always, and let his hand fall to his side instead of shielding the gentle light. Despite the laughter and flickering candlelight all around him, he remained in the shadows. As one with his background should be, arguably.

He was oh so tired of chasing glisten.

With an exhausted sigh, the seasoned sinner turned and sulked away from the glimmering procession towards the dingy-lit windows of the Tavern – the only light which remained in his life, apparently. So much for trying--

“Dismas? Dis! Where are you?” a familiar voice called behind him, followed by heavy footsteps and a knight stopped in front of him, barely keeping his candle from going out. “There you are! I asked you to wait for me, why wouldn’t you?”

“You… came back,” Dismas muttered, unable to quench the surprise in his voice.

“Of course I did, I told you I would, didn’t I?” the knight cocked a heavy brow. It looked so odd on his usually vexed face, and so familiar. He must’ve picked some of the highwayman’s mannerisms. “I had to remind His Holiness that I cannot do my duties as Relic Bearer this year.”

“You cannot?”

“It’s the head of the procession and I know you hate the limelight. Besides, you’d have to abstain from booze and hearty foods for a week to be allowed there, and I didn’t want to—Dismas, your candle!”

Too stunned by the new information, the highwayman blinked at the half-melted piece of wax in his hand:

“What ‘bout it?”

“It went out,” Reynauld complained as if it was a tragedy.

“Ah,” Dismas paused and technically didn’t even lie when he said. “Wind.”

“Oh, those are holy flames, Dis, you’re supposed to take care of them,” Rey glanced around like a boy who was about to yank someone’s braid and stood towards the ex-brigand. “It’s frowned upon, but I want you to keep the flame…”

Wicks touched, charred against burning, and in a few moments, there were two tiny flickering lights to chase the darkness away, like two unsteady heartbeats suspended in the night. Dismas supposed it was fitting, that Rey’s broad smile was outlined with a golden glow. He was breaking the rules, maybe, but he was breaking the rules for them… whatever they were.

“Let’s go back to the festival, I haven’t told you the story of Saint Elmo, I think you two would have had a lot to talk about if you ever met…”

[kisari]

Finished Baldur's Gate 3 Wow. Really great. I really went into it not caring how good it was. I bought it when it first went into Early Access forever ago. CRPGs are my jam and I knew even if it wasn't great, I'd enjoy it. But it really did exceed all expectations. Seeing it become critically acclaimed is... wild. And it deserves it. Fun to play. Enjoyable story. mega spoilers under the cut for the Dark Urge play through, chapter 3 and the ending

For my route, I played a "Redeemed" Dark Urge drow, kind of going a middle of the road type morality with an emphasis on freedom. Freedom from gods. Freedom from control. Freedom in it's purest form. Lots of daddy issues. I think this is partially why I love being a Bhaalspawn so much. I'm addicted to daddy issues. Having him romance Astarion only made sense. They worked perfectly together, honestly. I also romanced Halsin on the side, but it didn't include him in the ending scenes. Sucky. Wyll also broke his pact with Mizora for me, and because of it, Karlach is doomed. There is only one way to save her, and that's by having Wyll keep his pact with her and he vows to protect her in Avernus and save her heart... Since I didn't do that.... Karlach offered herself up to become a mindflayer. I let her, and she transformed. And then I also denied The Emperor and freed Orpheus. I think one of my biggest complaints, story wise, IS the emperor. His whole claim of, Mindflayers are still people is all well and good and yeah! Once they are out of a big brain's control, they are! But as soon as you say you want to release Orpheus... HE GOES AND JOINS THE BRAINS SIDE? It makes no logistical sense, to his character or the plot. The brain winning means /him/ being enthralled again, going against his core beliefs of freedom himself. And he seems to want to eat Orpheus' brain for literally no reason other than to be an ass. It's completely unnecessary to winning. While Karlach stays herself as a mind flayer, The Emperor really just does a shit job at being morally gray because his pragmatism goes into just... cruelty. Until the end I was thinking, yeah sure he can be trusted. Until then. What an idiot. AND HE KILLED HIS DRAGON LOVER. Anyways my beloved boy Kyros is free of Bhaal. Free of tadpole. And is now traveling the world with Astarion looking for a way to let him go into the sunlight again..