#crocker fish

[deathbypufferfish]

making progress at camp, but Midge still hasn't come across any other survivors :(

[ask-the-cookiefish-timeline]

Yo. We made an ask blog. I mean we as in me and one of the guys who writes this timeline. Everyone else is on board with it, though, so feel free to throw any questions our way, even at those of us you might not know much about. We’d be happy to answer, and I’m sure you’d be happy to know more about us or maybe even put us in some capital S situations.

Ask away, peak Homestuck Tumblr fandom style.

=>

…

I feel like I should back up a bit.

What exactly is this timeline?

This is, what the other author at one point named, Cookiefish.

A post canon of our own. A happy one. Sometimes a mundane one. Sometimes a stressful one. But a happy one.

Who am I?

You already know who I am.

I’m this guy. And also this guy.

I don’t write this timeline, unlike some other guy you might now. I’m just in it. I’m only writing this post because nobody else felt like it. Otherwise I live a pretty chill life. I’m lowkey just a chill guy.

Anyways.

Just about everyone who was “alive” at the end of Act 7 is present here in this timeline. Gamzee’s here. The sprites are here, including both Nannas. Jane’s Dad and the Mayor are here. Can’t forget the Mayor.

If you’d like to know more about our funny little exploits, start here:

When you’re done with those, check out all the other shit we got going on here:

Are any of our answers canon to the actual Cookiefish timeline?

Who knows. Doesn’t matter, right?

We’re all here for fun. It’s all for fun.

[swordmouse]

The Condesce is sending me tumblr asks now

[ender--slime]

[Baking Bonanza/Dirk Fishing]

🍪 🐟 timeline lineup of my Jane and Dirk! 🍪and 🐟are the same timeline, no splits here.

more info under the cut!!

i’ll eventually do a lineup of everyone else in this timeline (although, admittedly, i haven’t thought about what they’re up to very much. i know june is june and um…yeah that’s it) but for now here’s the two most important guys! if you ever wondered what baking bonanza jane and dirk looked like above the camera. this is it ! ….so, me! and. my partner! ASJKDDJKD.

you’ll see a LOT MORE of this dirk at sahcon this year in Dirk Strider Takes You Fishing, which takes place a year after Baking Bonanza! so, just like real life!! and then after that …idk! maybe we have two panels, i’ll make a few comics, and then i’ll leave these guys be after that. or maybe inspiration will hit and i’ll make some other crazy cool panel about. idk the beta kids doing something. who knows!!!

[coachbeards]

"god nathan's mad at something duke did when they were kids!!! get over it!" i love duke but like. he literally stuck tacks into his back to see how long it'd take him to notice because he couldn't feel it. like. he literaly. bullied nathan. canonically. TACKS. in the back!!!! when they were like 8 years old!!!!!!!! it was "congratulating him" on the fact that a girl was talking to him or something,,, and he didn't talk to another girl for TWO YEARS because of this

[angel---eater]

y'know what's really weird that i see too often actually? how hs fans will take bro's actions into account when analyzing dirk and will sometimes even let bro's actions completely colour over their opinions of dirk, but its RARE that i see the same done for mom and roxy. like rose's childhood wasnt great either, and roxy has ALSO done some really fucked up, shitty things to her friends. shes arguably done worse things than dirk has, bc dirk never sexually harrassed anyone for years straight. dirk's teenaged missteps are clumsy attempts at showing care and tbh arent NEARLY as well thought out as he claims them to be. dirk is hard headed and an absolute control freak and claims to lead with his brain but really leads with his dumb stubborn heart, which gets him into trouble and has him crossing boundaries, which he then broods over for centuries thus feeding into his self-hate spiral and making him overall worse in health & to be around

roxy on the other hand runs on strategic avoidance, self-indulgence, and a deep loneliness (a void, even) that shes very desperate to fill (understandible and painfully human), which is what keeps her drinking and also what keeps her going after dirk even when she knows she doesnt have a chance, and when she knows that on some level she must be messing him up (she was). and shes aware of all this too!!! but she didnt stop until contact was actually made!!!

[pages 5809, 5810. just reread that whole conversation again tbh its all critical to roxy as a concept]

roxy's actual arc is fuckin fantastic!!!! hs fans are missing out on how roxy is actually written!!! theyre missing out on roxy im fuckin despairing!!!! roxy is the most emotionally intellegent strilonde but she had to get in there and do the dirty work to achieve what she has rn!!! and shes STILL actively improving bc its only until semi-recently in HSBC that she finally completely unburied her head from the sand about jane in candy!! bc shes still avoidant but whoops now her kid is in danger so ig jane really is that far gone!!!!

we saw rose herself finally remark on how she really feels about roxy. like this is from the timeline where they both become parents. like how fucked would it be if dave had to watch dirk be an actual good parent to a kid the way rose has been watching roxy? and pretend to be happy to see it cause thats just what you Do when someone you know and love has a baby? thats soooo fucked up and deserves 5287593 essays. that knife in rose's side is twisted way too deep to be pulled out and its mom lalonde's fault

[mysticfishphantom]

decided to combine two brainrots : Homestuck and regency fashion. so heres jane and roxy in regecency dreamer rags

[davekat-sucks]

[joaniam]

I bring to my corner of the tlt fandom (many of them nerds who know a lot about classic lit and theology) a kind of massive Homestuck shock value that simply cannot be replaced

[deadpatrol]

I know "let me tell you about homestuck" has been a meme for the longest time, but I truly do take so much joy in being able to earnestly tell someone that "Oh yeah, one of the story's main antagonists is Betty Crocker. Yeah, like the boxed brownie mix. Except she's a sexy 12-foot tall alien fish empress who can shoot lasers out of her eyes."

[macbxth-pdf]

Fish Flag

Original Flag, Inspiration, and Palette by @estrogenism (Thank you for the permission to edit this flag!)

What does Fish mean?

Fish is a black exclusive term for a femme lesbian. This label was first recorded as a counterpart the label 'Stud' in a Masters of Arts thesis titled, 'A Study of a Public Lesbian Community' by Ethel Sawyer. Black masculinity is to Stud as Black femininity is to Fish.

The Flag: Symbols and Colors

School of Black Fish: In the original flag I found on my dash, estrogenism uses an image of a tropical fish to represent the body diversity among black femmes. I decided to go with a school of fish to represent the community among black femmes. Initially, I wanted the school to look like a crescent moon to represent femininity further, but I wasn't fuckin' with it.

Colors:

The darkest purple: Womanism (a feminist school of thought centered around the black experience)

2nd darkest purple: Black sapphicism

2nd lightest purple: Black sapphic history

Lightest purple: Unity between all fish (trans, cis, intersex, aspec, arospec etc)

Lightest pink: Subversion of femininity

2nd Lightest Pink: Vulnerability (????)

Orangey-Pink: Persistence

Red: Love

Recommended Reading

Femme: Feminists, Lesbians, and Bad Girls (Edited by Laura Harris and Elizabeth Crocker) [There are two relevant segments. Fish Tales and Fish Pond]

A Public Study of a Lesbian Community by Ethel Sawyer (This study was done by a heterosexual woman. Due to the time it is from, harmful stereotypes of both studs and fish are portrayed in this thesis. These misconceptions are incredibly dated.)

Note: Based on the reading that I have done (Including the original thesis itself), some bisexual women were involved in the lesbian bar culture and identified with the label Fish. Out of the 7 fish interviewed by Sawyer, 2 out of 7 (28%) enjoyed sex with men. That being said I don’t mind or care if black bisexual femmes use this flag. But please understand the difference between presenting femininely and femme culture within the sapphic context (specifically butchfemme/studfemme/stud-fish community) before using this label.

THIS IS THE FIRST FLAG I MADE SO PLEASEEEE BE KIND

Software/Website used: Canva (Design and Assets) and Coolors (palette picking)

[viriborne]

Every time something new to me is revealed about Jojos, the more I believe my friends’ statement that it’s the Homestuck of anime

I asked my Jojo friends and no way he was trying to cosplay this guy

[homestuck-fanauthor-coalition]

BITCHES ITS SPOOKY SEASON!

Hey guys! This past month our Coalition has been writing our latest Competition: Monsterstuck! Yall should join us in reading and voting from now until October 1st! You can choose between Scariest Monster, Angstiest Injury or Death Scene, Best in Executing a Twist, and more!

There were 12 entries in total, featuring a wide variety of monsters (both scary, and not!) List below the cut for yall to check out.

(Artwork by our awesome admin @arealpeople)

(1) Bad Dog

Becquerel will keep Jade Harley safe at any cost.

(2) A Fish Out of Water

Sollux is unlucky with love, this is until he meets Feferi at a party.

(3) Do Robots Dream of Eternal Sleep?

You are designation BR-0, a V1 model.

(4) Lady Woegoth and the Emerald Flame

Four months and thirteen days after defeating the notorious White Wizard, Rose Lalonde goes after one of his followers in a desperate bid to save the world.

(5) Cottage in the Woods

Dave wakes up in a cottage in the woods with little memory of how he got there. Luckily, there's a kind young woman there to take care of him.

(6) Vantaswocky

They took their vorpal swords in hand; Long time the manxome foe they sought— So rested they by the Tumtum tree And stood awhile in thought. And, as in uffish thought they stood, The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame, Came whiffling through the tulgey wood, And burbled as he came!

(7) To Touch the Stars

Kanaya asks squid mermaid Rose out on a date with a bouquet of flowers and gets to see the stars up close.

(8) Crestfallen Kings and Queens

You stare in awe and terror at the deepsea monstrosity behind the glass cage taking up nearly half of the entire facility.

(9) With The Tides

It's been a year since she disappeared. You don't want to go.

(10) Our C A M P F I R E S O N G song! (there is no song)

Staring into the scarlet flames, tales are told to raise some manes.

(11) Not Your Mama's Ship Fic

Adventurer Extrordinare Jake English is visiting Inverness, Scotland for a week.

(12) Her Deep Disquiet

In 1894, Miss Jade Harley, a private detective employed by the Crocker-English Company, went to a small New England town to follow the trail of a missing woman. This series of letters is all that remains.

Special shout out to our authors! @eridan-amporaa ; @dave2olkat ; @orangestorapples ; @ambrosianlullaby ; @jonayariley ; @bralsradoesfanfiction ; @june-egbert-official ; @manifestmerlin ; @bigtopcheezborger ; @neapolitangirl ; @tehstripe ; @aspendrake1185

[duckapus]

Fairly Oddparents/Splatoon Crossover AU

-Dimmsdale is in the Splatlands, and is still called that because if I change it to a fish pun I have to change Doug Dimmadome's name too and I don't want to.

-Fairies are still a Thing, and the relevant fairies are still the same (admittedly vague) ages they are in canon, so Cosmo and Wanda's generation showed up just in time to witness humanity's downfall; the floods, the domes, the professor, the final desperate failure in Alterna, all of it.

-Also all the other characters are their usual ages too, so any of the kids that I turn into Inkings or Octolings are going to be blobby for a while. With one notable exception that I'll explain when it comes up.

-The Turners are Octolings, but they're not from the Domes (hence why I put Dimmsdale in the Splatlands. I wanted them near where all the action is for reasons I'll get into later and Inkadia didn't have Octolings until after the first game's story mode while the Splatlands have always had them).

-Timmy still gets Cosmo and Wanda because his parents are still Like That, and his overbite is even more potent since it's made of the point of his beak instead of a pair of front teeth.

-Cosmo and Wanda almost look like an Inkling and an Octoling, respectively. They got a few details wrong, the biggest one being that they got their hair as close to what they're used to as they could but forgot to check if they had the right number of tentacles.

-Chester's an Inkling, no real notes there

-AJ is a bald Sea Urchin

-Crocker is an Inkling and other than the obvious details looks and acts pretty much exactly like he usually does, complete with neck ears

-Francis is a bull shark, as a reference to his "Bull-E" persona in the episode where everyone's superheroes

-Doug Dimmadome is a walrus (Marina mentions that her landlord is a Narwhal in Splat 2, marine mammal people exist)

-Vicky and Tootie are Octolings, and they are from the Domes but Vicky got them out. She actually hadn't heard Calamari Inkantation at the time, but Tootie had due to a Conveniently Placed Vent, and Vicky knew that anyone who heard that song would try to get to the surface and some of them didn't make it out alive and if even Elites hand-picked by DJ Octavio himself couldn't make it there's no way her seven-year-old nearsighted inkblot of a little sister would be able to get out on her own, but if she stayed she'd be miserable and trapped forever and that would be even worse, so Vicky packed their bags and grabbed Tootie and climbed for their lives despite very much not being freed from the Octarian propaganda by a weird magic folk-turned-pop song like everybody else who made this climb. They would've made it to Inkopolis like the other refugees but they made a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in Dimmsdale instead.

-Due to this she ends up having to raise her sister, get enough money to keep them both alive via Grizzco, babysitting and other odd jobs (she can't do turf or ranked/league because there's too much chance of her training/brainwashing kicking in and making her do something stupid Because Inklings like attack her own teammates or ignore the end-of-match whistle), teach Tootie how to speak Inklish and both of them how to read it, and figure out how to get them legal identities, all while every fiber of her being screams at her that The Enemy is all around them (it takes her the better part of a year after escaping to finally find and listen to the Inkantation, since she didn't know what it was called and wasn't high enough in the ranks to know anything about the Cuttlefish family). At fourteen.

-Chloe is an Inkling, and when she's introduced she already knows how to shift and is clearly used to it despite still being a month and a half or so away from turning twelve, which is... kind of a Bad Sign. Most Cephalings only manage that by thirteen or fourteen, though getting it at twelve, while uncommon, isn't unheard of. Any earlier and there's potentially health risks, especially since it almost has to be a case of the kid forcing it to happen (usually due to pressure and unrealistic expectations, often of the parental variety). And I mean big, "how prepared are you for your child to never be able to walk again" kind of health risks, though that's the worst-case scenario. In Chloe's case there were, in fact, negative effects, but nothing that drastic.

...No, she just starts aching all over if she spends too much time in squid form. And sometimes has stiff joints when it's cold.

-Haven't figured out what the rest of the human characters get turned into for this, but the alien and magical characters are still the same species they were in canon. And yes, the events of the show more-or-less stay the same.

-For a bit of post-series stuff, Timmy, Tootie, Chester and Chloe decide to try at being a comp team, and they're actually pretty good at it (thanks in large part to Vicky teaching them everything she learned from Grizzco, her time in the Octarian military and all the weird tricks she's had to pick up during their adventures). Their team's called the Twerpz and they've got a bit of an unusual lineup of preferred weapons.

Timmy (Splat Handle "No Ruelz" because of course it is) is the team captain and uses a Snipewriter 5H

Tootie (just uses her name) uses a Sloshing Machine Neo

Chester (uses his last name because of the whole infamous family legacy thing) uses the vanilla Splatana Stamper, and has discovered that he can use it like a baseball bat to knock away incoming bombs... aside from burst bombs since they explode on impact. Learned that one the hard way.

Chloe (goes by "3LeafClovr" because everyone thinks she's lucky when she's really not) uses a Luna Blaster Neo. She gets around the issue with her squid form by only shifting when absolutely necessary and compensating with Ink Saver (both kinds), Ink Recovery Up, a little Run Speed Up, and Parkour

So they've got a blaster that can't swim, a splatana that thinks he's in a completely different sport, their only backliner is a pencil, and not a single one of them has Ink Armor despite having two short-range weapons. It probably shouldn't work, but it does, because all four of them are completely nuts and using strategies concocted by a former Octarian soldier and Timmy coddamn Turner of all people

-Tootie ends up as Neo Agent 3. Thanks to being friends with Timmy Return of the Mammalians isn't even close to the weirdest thing that's ever happened to her. And yes this means that by that point she and Vicky have a Smallfry roommate. Tootie found him alone in the desert. Everybody calls him Shwaffle and there are absolutely zero thoughts between those big ol' eyes.

-The rest of the Squidbeak Splatoon is very confused and concerned by the things they hear about their new agent's friends and hometown

-When Timmy was twelve he and Vicky did something and now every gang in the Splatlands is scared shitless of them, including Deep Cut. They've never managed to tell anyone the full story of what exactly happened, though they will occasionally reference bits and pieces of it that sound absolutely batshit insane out of context

[ender--slime]

I am happy because everyone loves me.

[Baking Bonanza/Fishing Route]

[dragonomatopoeia]

Air's End-of-Year Youtube Video Rec-List Round-Up

In light of recent events and also because I wanted to, I have put together a rec list of various (mostly longform) videos that I've enjoyed this year. Not all of these videos were released this year, however-- I just happened to see them for the first time in 2023. For readability and quality of life purposes, I have put this list under a readmore and divided the videos up by category, then creator, which means that some youtube channels might appear in multiple categories

I reserve the right to edit this later as I remember more videos, but I feel comfortable publishing it as is, considering it has almost 100 videos on it at this point

Cooking

Get Curried Chili Garlic Rosemary Chicken Recipe | How to Make Chili Garlic Rosemary Chicken at Home | Prateek Anardana Chicken Recipe | Delicious Himachal Style Anardana Chicken Recipe at Home | Chef Prateek Old Delhi Style Tangdi Kebab | How to Make Indian Starter Tangdi Kebab Recipe | Chef Prateek Dhawan

How to Cook That The $10 Million dollar lie (Betty Crocker) Debunking the Pink Sauce Controversy | How To Cook That Ann Reardon Top 7 Best Easy Lemon Recipes 🍋 | How To Cook That Ann Reardon Toxic Foods promoted on TikTok! | How To Cook That Ann Reardon Why is Pyrex exploding? | How To Cook That Ann Reardon

Library of Congress' Youtube Channel El Camino del Mole a New Orleans El Camino del Pan a Baltimore

Immaculate Bites LEMON BUNDT CAKE FIRECRACKER SHRIMP

Simply Mamá Cooks 3 EASY Beef Pot Roast Recipes perfect for the cold weather EASY Chicken Tamales Recipe | How To Make Tamales Easy NO-KNEAD Soft Dinner Rolls + FLUFFY From Scratch Milk Rolls Recipe Zuppa Toscana Recipe EASY | Olive Garden Potato Sausage Soup Recipe

Fraud, Grifts, and Scams

FoldingIdeas Contrepreneurs: The Mikkelsen Twins The Future is a Dead Mall - Decentraland and the Metaverse In Search Of A Flat Earth This is Financial Advice

Maggie Mae Fish Is the "Off-Grid" Lifestyle a Lie??

Münecat I Debunked Every "Body Language Expert" on Youtube The Problem with Tony Robbins (Deep-Dive - Pt.1) The Problem with Tony Robbins (Deep-Dive - Pt. 2)

Super Eyepatch Wolf The Bizarre World of Fake Martial Arts The Bizarre World of Fake Psychics, Faith Healers, and Mediums Influencer Courses are Garbage: The Dark Side of Content Creation Tom Nicholas Griftonomics: Why Scams are Everywhere Now

We're In Hell A History of Spam on the Internet Hustling America: I Can't Believe This Show Is Real The Problem with Voluntourism WE Charity & the Nonprofit Industrial Complex

Gaming

Hbomberguy Halcyon Dreams: The Legacy of Dragon's Lair

Jacob Geller Games that Aren't Games How Can We Bear to Throw Anything Away?

Li Speaks An Exploration of the Avata Star Sue-niverse It's Time For You To Play Flash Games Again The Strange Case of Kissing and Flirting Games Untangling the Lore of Devilish Hairdresser

Mandaloregaming The Mystery of the Druids: A Bizarre Adventure Game

People Make Games The Games Industry Must Not Stay Silent on Palestine Investigation: Who’s Telling the Truth about Disco Elysium? Working at Valve: 'A Fearless Adventure' or 'Lord of the Flies'?

PowerPak Dead Space 3 Is Worse Than I Thought King's Quest - The First Adventure Game King's Quest 2 - A Bridge Too Far... MyHouse.WAD - Inside Doom's Most Terrifying Mod Squirrel Stapler is Absolutely Nuts Tunic is Deceptively Brilliant

Super Bunnyhop Perusing Pentiment's Boisterous Bibliography

History

BobbyBroccoli The image you can't submit to journals anymore

Cambrian Chronicles Wikipedia's King who Doesn't Exist

Defunctland Journey to EPCOT Center: A Symphonic History

Elliot Sang How Tea Became European McMindfulness: When Capitalism Goes Buddhist

Intelexual Media Creating The Conservative New Right In The 1970s A Buffet of Black Food History

Kaz Rowe A Deep Dive into the Deadly World of Victorian Patent Medicine Why Have So Many People Seen Ghost Ships? Why the Myth of the Library of Alexandria Is Wrong

Kendra Gaylord 500 years of dollhouses and what it meant to teach girls Alice Austen, the 1880s photographer: her house, her photos, her love life What happened to cheap food? Diners, Automats, and affordable eating

Nerdsync Bonkers origins of superhero memes The Scandalous REAL Origin of Superman's Lois Lane Superman's Uncomfortable History with Nuclear Weapons

Premodernist Advice for time traveling to medieval Europe

Stepback History How The Vietnam War Birthed a Generation of White Terrorists OK Fine I’ll Talk About Ancient Apocalypse

Tantacrul Notation Must Die: The Battle For How We Read Music

Film and Television

Be Kind Rewind How Breakfast at Tiffany's Turned into a Totally Different Movie | Adapting a Classic Casting the Women of Valley of the Dolls | PT 1 The Making of Valley of the Dolls | PT 2 How the "Old Ladies N' Hijinks" Subgenre Became a Thing How a "Sacrilegious" Film Changed Hollywood Forever... So I watched BLONDE... Why Tallulah Bankhead Never Became a Movie Star

Big Joel The Song That Broke West Side Story

Cherrybepsi Can We Kill the Final Girl Trope Already?

Hazel weird & kinda scary tokusatsu girls

Jane Mulcahy The Lunacy of Teen Wolf (Part 1) What is the 'psycho biddy' genre?

Maggie Mae Fish BLACK CHRISTMAS Before & After "Me Too" The War on "Woke" Hollywood: A History of Blacklists and Strikes Why is Clint Eastwood

Princess Weekes Black Trauma vs. Black Horror Why Are There So Many Confederate Vampires? Why Don't Worry Darling Doesn't Work ...

Shanspeare EUPHORIA: Sam Levinson’s Unfulfilled Fantasy The Girlboss-ification of the Horror Genre TikTok Femininity Coaching and Aestheticizing Racism

Science and Technology

BobbyBroccoli The $21,000,000,000 hole in Texas The man who faked human cloning How to catch a criminal cloner

Eastman Museum's Youtube Channel Photographic Processes Series

Technology Connections What's the deal with the popcorn button?

Practical Engineering How Flood Tunnels Work What's the Difference Between Paint and Coatings? Why Is Desalination So Difficult? Why Railroads Don't Need Expansion Joints