#cringey persona moment
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Track #2, Lyrically Yours
Warning: Fluff. This is a work of fiction with nothing to do with the idol's actual life. I do like some feedback. If you ever feel like "Hey this is very offensive." do tell me.
Pairing: Lyricist!Mark x Writer fem!reader
Summary: Mark asks you what you like about being a writer/author.
Word Count: 518 Words
A/N: I actually posted this months ago but I decided to add more words and I think I made it better aswell haha.
Written: 28 April 2024
Track #1, Copycat Hearts - Anton of Riize
Masterlist © ae-cow. Do not claim, steal or repost. All rights reserved
“What made you become a writer? What is it that you like about it?” Mark asked, his eyes curious and warm.
You took a moment to think before answering, “I get to write the love life I want, no matter how cliché or cringey the lines might be.”
You paused, smiling as the words began to flow. “The progression of falling in love is beautiful, Like… enemies to lovers, you despise each other, but then you start noticing those little details you wish you hadn’t, because they make you fall even harder.”
“Or friends to lovers, where two people who never thought of each other that way end up revealing their truest selves, and despite knowing each other so well you still want to learn more.”
You grin as a new thought hits you. “Oh! This is one of my favorites,” you say, excitement bubbling over as you lean closer, your hand unconsciously settling on his
He raises a brow, amused. “What’s that?”
“The Matchmaker trope,” you explain, eyes alight “The one where ‘the matched’ asks Cupid for help… but Cupid ends up falling for them.”
He chuckles softly, his gaze flicking down to where your hand rests over his. “So, the matchmaker who’s so busy trying to help someone else find love,” he murmurs, his voice low, “doesn’t see it coming when they fall in love themselves.”
“Exactly!” you laugh, a little breathlessly. “The whole time, they’re focused on everyone else’s love story, and they don’t realize they’re in the middle of one.”
Mark holds your gaze, a small smile playing at his lips. “I can see why you like it.”
For a moment, there’s a silence that feels like its own story—a pause filled with unspoken words and mutual realization. You suddenly realize you’re still holding onto his arm and quickly pull your hand back, clearing your throat.
“S-sorry. I got a little carried away,” you stammer, feeling the warmth rise in your cheeks
“No need to apologize,” he says, his smile soft.
“Maybe… maybe I should thank Cupid instead.”
“Go on,” he encouraged, his gaze steady and interested. “I like how you explain it all so clearly.”
You shifted your seat a little, something Mark couldn't help but notice “Then there’s fake dating,” you continued. “You start by pretending, but the lines blur, and you can’t help but wish it were real.”
You glanced at him, his attention unwavering, and something in his expression emboldened you. “Or office romance. It starts awkwardly, strictly professional but as you get comfortable, you start to see the real person behind the work persona—the way they laugh, their smile. It’s like discovering a whole new side of them outside the office.”
Mark leaned forward slightly, his tone soft. “And what about one between two people who work similarly but in different worlds?”
You froze, caught off guard. “W-what do you mean?” you stuttered, your heart pounding.
“Like… a songwriter and a book author,” he murmured, his eyes drifting from yours to your lips.
You felt the heat rise in your cheeks. Smiling, you replied, “Well, you’ll just have to read the book to see how it ends.”
#mark x reader#mark lee#nct fluff#nctzen#nct x reader#nct imagines#nct oneshot#nct drabbles#nct mark#mark imagines#mark x you#mark fluff#nct dream#nct fanfic#nct#nct x you#lee minhyung
32 notes
·
View notes
Text
Characters I hate the most in remarried empress
5:Heinrey
A lot of people dislike him now for being a cruel bastard to the point of torturing foreign nobles just so he can favor his wife. While that is messed up I'll take that over his constant "UwU my queen~" persona that he displays 90% of the time because at least the former is the remnants of his inital personality. It goes from kind of funny to straight up cringey, I do not see what Navier likes so much about his puppy guise, he's so low because to be fair, he was introduced as a scumbag (kind of), he just spends so much time simping that it's basically tossed to the side
4:Lebetti
I know a lot of fans say Lebetti is young and can learn better, she's 17 sure but it took her entire family being executed just so she'd be inclined to care about Ian. She's basically a mini me of Lotteshu and when's she not doing that, she's another blind Navier worshipper who is used for as a stand in for the reader, I don't know how fans didn't realize their stand in is a slave owner but I digress. The only reason she's at number 4 is that while I do find messed up she gets to raise Rashtas child and likely feed a biased view of her to Ian, if she really wanted to be evil, she would've let Ian become a slave for his mother's crimes so I guess there's that.
3:Kaufman
Jesus christ this man is a walking, talking manifestation of second ML syndrome. He's essentially a plot device for no other purpose other than propping up Navier as so beautiful that multiple royal guys want her and so shit can go down , And of course the obvious slipping love potions in others for no other reason then "the plot calls for it", he doesn't even face the consequences. He's fucking creepy as well since he's STILL in love with Navier even after she's married and pregnant GET OVER IT MAN! In the end he just gets with Charlotte (Kosairs ex fiancé) so writting wise: his whole "nice guy" problems can be solved
2:Alan
I really just have a personal vendetta against the whole Rimwell family. The moment I lost all hope in remarried empress is when I was expected to sympathize with a rapist. The narrative wants readers to believe Alan was wronged even though he was the one to participate in keeping Ian away from Rashta until she got rich, even though it was HIM who decided to abandon Rashta after she wanted to run away with him. Yeah he's a good father so what? Wow! A dad actually raising his kid how amazing, it's almost like that's called the bare minimum. The moment he tried to say that Ian deserved to be treated like a prince because he was Rashtas son is when the comments finally saw him for what he was, he makes up for all this by getting executed in the end
1:Laura
Your probably wondering out of all these scumbags, why is a random side character on top? Well, the characters below at some point had personality traits that made then complex characters in the past or they did something to make up a little for it making them a tiny bit more tolerable. Laura however has never once shown any signs of any other personality other than "Your majesty! Your so wonderful and the best! That slave needs to know its place around you!" At least all Naviers other ladies in waiting have some sort of gimmick to them or in rare cases they have other stories going on with just them. Laura's gimmick is that she is willing to hit a slave for Navier even if said slave made a genuine mistake and isn't used to palace intrigue. Her face pisses me off everytime I look at it and everytime she speaks it's never anything besides love for the leads and hatred for anyone against Navier. she needs to get off her glazing and go back to bullying Cinderella with her evil stepsister design she's got.
Anyway let me know if there's any other manhwa/comic to rant about because I'm sure everyone's probably tired of me bitching about remarried empress
#the remarried empress#empress navier#anti heinrey#rashta#anti kaufman#Sovieshu was close but he didn't make the cut because A: everyone already agrees he sucks B: he at least is served serious consequences
32 notes
·
View notes
Note
no cuz same i’m at work but so bored sometimes so i just think up headcanons and scenarios and bother ppl on here😓😓
i’ve been convinced to read romance books recently?? i’m not rly one for it but from like.. a nerdy🤓 perspective i like learning about all the different tropes and cliches (even if some of them are cringey asf??) and i was wondering if u had an opinion on which riize members fit different tropes best?? like.. i’ll try to remember 7…
grumpy x sunshine
friends to lovers
enemies to lovers
fake dating
arranged marriage/dating
billionaire romance🤭🤭
second chance
idk if you’ll think this is fun or not but i thought i’d pitch it to you!! lol
- 🧸 anon
you don’t bother me at all!! you’re rlly cool and u give me rlly good ideas!! this took me abt 3 hours in total i think and i loved writing these so enjoy :D
friends to lovers is so anton coded!!! he would fall in love you over the years, from a little crush when you were kids to being teenagers and being absolutely enamoured with you. he just wanted to show his love to you so badly, throwing subtle hints e.g buying your favourite snacks for you and bringing up things he knew you liked. he would be so happy when you finally told him you liked him :( i was actually going to write a little something about this but i have so many others in my list of things to write that idk when it’ll happen (inspired by this song)
billionaire romance instantly made me think of eunseok who would always take you out for shopping sprees, buying you multiple designer items in one sitting. he would also take you to the fanciest restaurants, insisting that you order anything you want. would also take you anywhere in the world you wanted, ticking off many places on your bucket list that you had since you were young. anything you could ever ask for, you would have it as soon as possible.
grumpy x sunshine reminds me of sohee!!! when you first met, he was so intimidated by your cold persona and had no idea how to approach you. eventually, he got the courage to do so by asking you to go on a walk with him. you’d come to learn that you actually had a lot in common despite the contrast in your personalities. as you started to date, you began to see that opposites do attract as his warmth and optimism complemented your coldness and bluntness.
enemies to lovers with shotaro where you were part of rivalling dance teams in the same area. it was so extremely childish how the tension between your groups has escalated this far over the years. at school, you had been paired for the end of year showcase. this forced you to spend hours together in the school’s dance studio, figuring out the choreography and practicing. you began to see that shotaro was driven, not just by competition, but by a genuine love for dance which you shared. after you’d finished your performance, he complimented you on your skills and offered to take you for some boba (on him of course). and it was that moment that you’d finally realised that you were both falling for each other.
seunghan and fake dating goes perfectly to me. he needed to make his ex-girlfriend jealous so he asked you and of course you accepted, anything for a friend. as you did romantic things together such as holding hands and going on cute ice cream dates, he felt himself loving you more and more with each passing second. you were shocked to hear the words “i love you” as you walked home with him after classes. you said it back, wanting to say the words ever since you initially agreed to this fake dating situation. and with that, it wasn’t fake anymore; you were really together and in love, something his ex didn’t have.
i see sungchan as second chance. the breakup was nasty, both of you saying hurtful things that made each other’s heart shatter into a million pieces. sungchan would do anything to have you back, delivering flowers with handwritten messages to your doorstep every week telling you how much he loved and missed you. with time, you realised just how much you couldn’t live without him and his contagious smile. you’d walk to his house with a box of homemade cookies that you used to bake together with the words “i love you.” he swore he could’ve cried when he opened the door to see you there, instantly hugging you. he let you in and you talked for hours, finally agreeing to get back together before having makeup sex, the room filled with i love you’s as he fucked you so well.
an arranged marriage situation made me think of wonbin. it had happened because you both hadn’t found someone yet, too quiet and reserved for the chaos of the dating world. your families were desperate to see you settled so they took it upon themselves to find a match; each other. you surprisingly found peace in each other, enjoying quiet evenings in together. you found yourself slowly falling in love with him, drawn to his calm demeanour that was similar to yours. life with him was so easy and you wouldn’t want it any other way.
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
What If They Rebooted the Zelda Cartoon?
I recently binged the entirety of the 1980s Legend of Zelda cartoon on YouTube over the course of an evening. It's basically as cringey as I remember, though there are the occasional genuinely funny zingers. The thing is, it was entirely standard for cartoon series in the 80s--cheap animation, low-effort, repetitive writing, so episodic that you could play the episodes in any order and it would still make just as much sense (in fact, we suspect that the last two episodes were swapped for airing), and 100% comedy with no actual tension or real stakes. The amazing thing is that the production team clearly cared about what they were making--they just didn't have the resources or freedom to make it well.
So what if someone tried again, now, with another ~35 years of Zelda lore to draw on for material AND the corresponding advancement in the medium of TV animation? Think of the possibilities!
I'm envisioning not the same tone as the original, but the equivalent tone for this decade--still generous with the humor, but with genuine stakes and a more serialized story line. Also less blatantly horny--Link constantly demanding kisses from Zelda is both annoyingly repetitive and makes him look like a creeper by modern standards. There are better ways to portray teenagers who are into each other but too proud to show vulnerability and too stubborn to admit that they don't know what they're doing.
It would not be Individual Zelda Game(s): The Cartoon, but its own thing that uses ideas from any and all games as appropriate.
Spryte could still be in it, but now she'd have a Navi-like role of identifying monsters for Link (who can be new to the hero business) and spotting for him when he fights them. And she can still have a thing for him...in fact, go ahead and make Link a chick magnet who's too young and inexperienced to know how to handle it gracefully, which is a source of friction between him and Zelda. That gives us ready-made plot complications for characters like Malon, Ruto and/or Mipha, Nabooru, Midna, maybe even Saria.
Three words: Link's Awakening episode. (Or few-episode arc.) Link goes missing during a storm at sea and the action is split between him, navigating Koholint Island, and the rest of the gang back in Hyrule, trying to find him.
We also need an episode introducing Zelda's alter-ego as Sheik. But not "Everyone tells the girl she can't do the thing because she's a girl, so she disguises herself as a boy and does the thing, and then unmasks herself at a dramatic moment and they all eat crow." That sort of thing went out with the 90s. Maybe more of a Breath of the Wild situation where the king insists Zelda needs to spend more time developing her magical princess powers at home and can't go on adventures with Link, so she develops the Sheik persona in order to sneak out.
Link gets to say "Well, excuuuse me, princess!" once in the entire runtime of the series, as a throwback gag.
I could probably keep going, but you get the idea.
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
LIGHTS, CAMERAS, ACTION - BEING YOUR MOST MAGNETIC, PHOTOGENIC SELF ; MANIFESTATION 101
Hey ! So I wanted to share my thoughts on being more magnetic with your persona and growing into your most photogenic self. As someone who didn't like taking pictures, and was always stuck with the same selfie pics being shot from my left angle I had decided to put myself into different boxes until I eventually stuck my foot out of them. At some point, I felt rather estranged to photography, not liking how I looked or felt and my my my did it show on camera. I had a vision of me being my most picturesque, most striking, beautiful self, and knew that if my mind could see it then it meant it we're possible. And I mean, to be honest, I had done it so many times before I was just unaware of it. And for me, even when your unaware of it the potential is there, it just needs more work.
So now, I'm ready to share what I've learned with obtaining a more photogenic persona. If you've had dreams of being a supermodel, a star or someone who just likes to be photographed a lot then this is for you. I'll try to make this super sweet and easy for you guys and give some tips on how to manifest your best photogenic self.
First tip : Start small. Get that camera phone and start taking pictures from unusual angles.
Sometimes it hurts to see ourselves in a way that doesnt match the vision we see for ourselves and thats okay. It takes work and practice but don't give up..
Now if you didn't like some of the pictures, what emotion do you feel? Shame? embarassed? cringey? I ask because our emotions play heavily into our reflection, and a lot of how you feel can reflect back to you on the photo.
When you're looking straight into the mirror, you gotta feel it. Feel allll of it. And leave no crumbs.
If you're not use to feeling like your 'that girl' then baby you gotta make it that way. I aint never said it would be easy, but I never said it could get difficult. Be a star! DONT BE AFRAID TO SHIT ON EM!!!!
Now when focusing on trying to manifest this desire, who are some super models, ig babes, or people who inspire you to be more photogenic look like? Vision boards are a great way to create a space for your vision to come to light because the focus is on the energy and less on the individual of liking.
When meditating on your desire, affirmations around photoshoots, feeling beautiful, and being a model work to the t. It's even best to program your mind into believing them while doing the thing.
So when your practicing, challenge your mind while focusing on some new poses. Your mind will begin to follow divine instruction through intuitive based thinking and you'll flow deeper into the subject at hand. No need to control every aspect, this is simply watering a plant. We got to plant the seed just to see it through babies.
Play with yourself, baby you gotta have fun! I wan't yall to shake off those insecurities because I promise you the roots of them aren't from your own tree. So weed them out and start all over. You deserve to see yourself in a new, beautiful light. This is your world, we just livin' in it.
It all starts off with the poses, make them worth it! Whenever you feel uncomfortable thats when you keep going because THAT'S what starts this train up until we get ready to go into the finish line. Like I said before, this doesn't come easy if you're not use to allowing yourself to freely pose and feeling good as hell while doing it.
You manifest it by forcing yourself into this new formation. When you look into the camera, you need to feel that you are the supermodel of the moment. Even if it doesn't feel real, even if you have to fight with yourself. The thing is. We are born with a certain ability to manifest the desires of our reality. Everything can be ours, if you just see it through.
Mirror Magic should be one of the main focus for practicing and developing your skill. Because the camera is reflecting back to you what you see. You ever took a picture of yourself and just hated it, but other people did? It starts with how your mind reacts to certain things based of emotion. So when I say try focusing on poses and doing affirmations in the mirror I want you to appreciate your beauty and also understand that your beauty is indescribable and can't be duplicated. I want more of y'all to understand that your thoughts can sometimes play tricks on you... so if you feel like you're not photogenic than your commiting to downplaying yourself and thats the lowest frequency to be on. You get what I mean?
Being confident puts you in a neutral/higher frequency than most, so you always gotta stand ten toes on your magic, your beauty, your essence, and your light. I hope this message can help a babe be her most photogenic self. Have fun, and be yourself! Bye babies.
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
Elysia Sage Stockholm | 23 | 4’11 | November 11th
Personality: An OnlyFans and Twitch legend, Elysia is loud and proud about being herself, even if that means being off-putting to the average viewer. Her unfiltered nature is both her greatest strength and her biggest vulnerability. Despite her bold exterior, she is very respectful to her friends and her frequently rotating list of partners, often quieting her extroverted nature to enjoy intimate moments with them. Her loyalty to her friends is unwavering, and she often goes out of her way to support and uplift them.
Elysia’s fearlessness in speaking her mind and using her platform to stand up for others has made her a polarizing figure online. She’s an advocate for body positivity, sexual freedom, and mental health awareness. However, this outspoken attitude comes at a personal cost. She struggles with setting boundaries and often pushes herself too far, getting into heated online battles with trolls or occasionally ending up in the ER when her kinks become too extreme.
Ely is a huge fan of morbid things, enjoying horror media and dark content daily. Her fascination with the macabre extends into her personal life, influencing her bedroom interests and her online persona. When she’s not making porn or having sex for fun, Elysia is immersed in the gaming world, either streaming solo or playing with friends, often combining her passions by hosting gaming sessions with a sexual twist.
Despite her seemingly carefree and confident demeanor, Elysia has her moments of doubt and negative thinking. She sometimes turns to weed and even more sex as a form of self-medication. To counter these struggles, she frequently sees a therapist online and is committed to working through her issues and managing her mental health.
Backstory: Born to a loving single mother, Elysia was raised to be herself and to do so loudly. Her mother, a former dancer who now runs a strip club in Boston, instilled in her the importance of confidence and self-expression. Elysia spent her childhood backstage at the club, surrounded by strong, confident women who became her role models. This unconventional upbringing gave her a unique perspective on life and an early education in the power of performance and sexuality.
As a child, Elysia was the one who got in trouble for talking during class, for discussing inappropriate topics on the playground, and for pulling stunts to capture the attention of her classmates she had crushes on. Her fascination with the bruises and scrapes she and her peers acquired evolved into a deep curiosity about the human body and pain, leading her down a path of exploring darker, more taboo subjects as she grew older.
Inspired by the personalities she watched online, Elysia started creating content at a young age, producing cringey videos of herself playing video games and reviewing her favorite horror movies. While she’s tried to erase those early attempts from the internet, they occasionally resurface with the occasional “this u?” message in her DMs, reminding her of how far she’s come. Today, she exudes confidence in her streams and videos, seamlessly blending her love for gaming with her provocative persona.
Motivations and Goals: Elysia’s primary goal is to expand her online empire and solidify her status as a top-tier content creator. She’s determined to push boundaries and challenge societal norms, using her platform to advocate for causes she believes in. At the same time, she is on a personal journey to become the best version of herself, working through her mental health struggles and learning to set healthy boundaries.
Likes:
Horror
Video games
Gothic/E-Girl fashion
Cosplay
Thrill seeking
Dislikes:
Authority
Monotony
Lack of creativity
Judgment
Intolerance
Appearance: Elysia is a very short woman with a pear-shaped body, her height standing at just 4’11. She has a distinctive bob haircut with straight bangs and two longer face-framing pieces in the front. Her eyes are a vibrant purple. Her skin is very pale, almost porcelain-like, covered in faded scars and bruises from her adventurous lifestyle. Her makeup is bold and dramatic, often featuring dark lipstick and smokey eyeshadow. She has a few tattoos, some that she got done in the spur of a moment decision at parties. She has triple lobe piercings on both ears, an industrial bar on one, a helix piercing on both ears, and both nostrils pierced.
She dresses like a stereotypical e-girl with a gothic twist, favoring outfits that combine fishnet stockings, platform boots, and oversized graphic tees with dark, intricate jewelry. Her style is a reflection of her personality: bold, unapologetic, and a little bit rebellious.
4 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi!! I saw you've been reblogging OTH and remembered that I have so many UOs about that show! I was hoping to confess them to you and would obviously love to hear yours as well if you're comfortable sharing! A few: I hate Leyton, don't think they have any chemistry and they bring out the worst, most unhappy sides of each other - i like ships who have similarities but these two are alike in the worst ways that just bring out each other's flaws. And the attempt to show Leyton being more playful and carefree once they were together just felt so forced and unnatural that it was cringey. I LOVED Jeyton and think that ship brings out by far the happiest and best Peyton and love how Peyton makes carefree goofy Jake deeper - they're perfect for each other. I love Brucas despite not liking the love triangle or really Lucas in general with anyone other than Brooke. Despite season 2 being Naley's worst season, I really love it -mostly because of Brooke's growth, Jeyton, Brucas developing such a deep friendship etc. And finally even though I really wanted to love Brulian I just don't - something about the writing and acting for Julian doesn't work for me AT ALL, he came off like such a sleazy, slick jerk initially and then they tried too hard to make him endearingly dorky and neither persona felt authentic, and he and Brooke just felt so forced to me. We all want to see Brooke get the happily ever after she deserved but it just feels so unearned and unnatural to me and I swear I'm not saying that just because I love Brucas's dynamic! Also regarding Clay and Quinn---the Clay forgetting he had a son thing was insane even for this show and just has me genuinely worried for his stability going forward and Quinn kind of came off like a vapid moron to me not gonna lie lol. Okay, thank you SOOOOO much for letting me vent these to you - it was the OTH-themed therapy I couldn't afford! And despite all this I still love the show and may even start a blog about it lol. You're the best :)
LOL thank you for feeling comfortable sharing all of that with me!
First of all, I pretty much agree about Leyton. They're one of my least favorite ships of all time for a reason. I could understand the appeal back in season 1 and even think they had a smidgen of chemistry back then. But later, absolutely not. The narrative deviated too far away from the idea that Lucas and Peyton were supposed to end up together. Lucas had a big crush on Peyton and was very into the idea of her. But after deciding he wanted to become a better guy and getting to know both girls as a friend, he realized he was in love with Brooke. It's never made ANY sense to me in universe that Lucas would decide to go for the much more difficult option of winning back Brooke over trying again with Peyton if his heart wasn't 100% with Brooke. So by the time the story started to change in season 4, it felt abrupt and unbelievable for Lucas to be "in denial" about his true feelings. Even worse, they played out the exact same story beats in season 5 when the triangle was between Peyton and Lindsey. So, does breaking up with Peyton result in Lucas becoming so distraught that his feelings for her go in the proverbial vault where he genuinely believes they're not there anymore, only for them to come out at just the right, convenient moment? Or does Lucas use Peyton as his easy, backup plan and only passively return to "true love always" when he has no other option and feels she's waited long enough? Anyways, I completely agree about Lucas and Peyton bringing out each other's worst qualities. I strongly feel that they become the worst, most selfish versions of themselves when they're together. They are incapable of getting their shit together without emotionally devastating other people in the process. And by late season 3, Peyton is such a lesser version of who she used to be in service of her being the ideal person for Lucas. Like, the idea that Brooke is becoming more independent and maybe not relying as much on Lucas's physical presence is supposed to signal alarm bells ringing that she doesn't love him enough? But Peyton's love is true because the writers constantly stick her into situations where the prince has to save the damsel in distress? It really does Peyton a disservice. It's okay to desire love and to want someone who will care for you and have your back when you need them, but Peyton's life always takes such a depressing turn right around the time she decides she wants Lucas. Ex: attempted rape, Ellie's death, school shooting, not being successful in LA. The problem with LP is that they were such an angsty couple to begin with. That's where they thrived. Whenever their relationship became more happy and cheesy, the chemistry was completely off. Whatever the opposite of natural chemistry is, that's what they had.
I don't have much to add about Brucas and Jeyton, but I feel the same way. I feel like their love stories were well written during seasons 2 and 3 and even parts of season 1. The chemistry between both was undeniable, and Brooke and Jake brought out much more likable, more selfless sides of Lucas and Peyton.
YES. I'm a big fan of season 2. While not every aspect of it was the best, the highs outweighed the lows for me. Almost all of the episodes are watchable and have great moments in them that don't detract from them. In my opinion, season 4, in contrast, is actively more bad than good up until 409, and overall has a much different tone from the first three seasons. Both Brooke and Peyton suffer from awful writing, and Haley is pushed into the background during her own pregnancy to focus almost exclusively on Nathan.
I get what you mean. I haven't gotten to the Julian years on my current rewatch, but they never grabbed me the way Brucas did. The chemistry was just.. lesser. It's no one's fault. You can't predict which actors are going to pop on screen. It makes sense that Brooke's chemistry and relationship with Julian would feel more comfortable and sweet rather than passionate and intense. But at the same time, I don't root for them as much as I'd like to for those exact reasons. I feel like when Brucas was at their best, none of Brooke's other relationships could come close. Julian's writing was odd. He's actively a different character in season 6 compared to seasons 8 and 9. I really wish he hadn't been introduced as Peyton's former love interest. That wasn't needed.
As for Clay and Quinn, I'm mostly neutral on Quinn as a character and their relationship. But I agree that Clay forgetting he had a child was A LOT. They could have easily adopted a child together, but instead they decided Clay needed a long lost child with his dead wife. The only reason they halfway got away with that is because Logan was by far the cutest kid alive.
You should definitely start an OTH blog! I'd follow you. <3
Unpopular opinions:
I could never hate or resent Haley for the tour. I think the writing surrounding all of that was incredibly sexist and kind of manipulative so that it would be in Nathan's favor rather than Haley's. We spent so much time on his perspective and his depression over the whole thing, but pretty much no screen time was devoted to Haley's time on the tour or what her conflicting feelings were re: Nathan and her marriage until she came home at the end of the season. There were different ideas offered up in regards to Haley/Chris. One was that she was simply envious of his freedom to pursue his dreams. Another is that Haley had genuine romantic feelings for Chris and was lying to herself for obvious reasons. I don't feel like any of that was given any closure.
I actively ignore the Brooke/Nathan sex tape. It was painfully clear the retcon was only added in to let Peyton (and Lucas) off the hook for betraying Brooke a second time and to conveniently "even the score" while making it appear Brooke had been a hypocrite all along.
Peyton confessing to Brooke that she still had feelings for Lucas wasn't noble, and her behavior after Brooke became hurt and angry to the point of asking Brooke whether or not she loved Lucas makes it clear that at least subconsciously, Peyton wasn't saying what she said solely to be honest and clear the air.
I shipped Haley and Chris a little bit. I'm so happy they never got together because it would have ruined everything, but there were vibes there.
I liked Alex better than Mia.
I love Rachel and think the writers did her SO dirty.
Deb was cringy after season 1. She still had good moments and I know that professionally, Barbara preferred her work as later Deb, but I always preferred the Deb that somewhat had her shit together. Later on, it felt like she was turned into too much of an anti Karen.
Anna was a good character. She was just awkwardly paired with Lucas and attached to Felix - who was the WORST.
So I guess my unpopular opinions are that I love most of the female characters? Even Peyton, even though it probably didn't come across that way LOL
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
Schedule Update
If you're following us, hey there. We've been more or less absent for quite some time. And at the moment, we're working on all of our pages. You may find some real-time changes going on as we're doing a pretty big overhaul. Please excuse the mess! If you're just discovering us, welcome! You can find us in these locations:
Curator Page
Blogspot
twitch (well, one of us anyway)
YouTube (again, one of us really)
Now, for the update!
[the below text has been taken directly from our blogspot]
Our reviews have not started back up again. We're hoping to return to writing reviews in July of 2024. It's been a while, but life has presented many obstacles in the past couple of years and we've experienced great losses. That being said, we're still here. We've just been doing other things. We planned in the past to redo all our older reviews, and that's still on the table. We have also received new titles since we last posted publicly, so we're going to review those as well. The schedule for all of these specific things, however, is kind of up in the air. We do have a few newer things to include now though. And if you've been missing our awkwardness and cringey wit, you're welcome to join us during one of our streams. We will also no longer be posting negative reviews to our tumblr or blogspot, and they will remain only on our curator page. While we've always tried to be compassionate and speak with constructive criticism, we fear that even this amount of scrutiny may negatively affect those who have devoted their time and care into the games they're creating. And, after all, we are just two people. We can't speak to what everyone will enjoy. We'll only go into depth on the things we really want to encourage in the future. Game Reviews: the 9th and 23rd of each month. Anime Reviews: once a month, on the last Tuesday of the month (once we begin, as we want to get our game reviews started again and don't know how much extra time we'll have to devote yet). Manga Reviews: once a month, on the first Tuesday of the month (as with the anime reviews, these likely won't begin as soon as we return). Curator Page: reviews for our curator page will be posted as soon as we've formulated a thought about the games we're reviewing. The full reviews will fall into line with our schedule as they've been completed, with games that have been gifted to us taking priority over others.
Streaming
Streams will be on Mondays and Fridays. At this point, there is no specific time to when these will begin, but we will post over on the paptain tumblr roughly thirty minutes before the stream starts. Since we have already been streaming so many different games, there will be a cycle between the streams from month-to-month. If this system works well, then we'll continue doing it. If not, we'll slowly phase out the cycle once each game is completed. Month A Monday Rotation: Dark Chronicle/Dark Cloud 2 > Persona 3 Reload Friday Rotation: Ys VIII > (Unannounced) Month B Monday Rotation: The Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel > NEO: The World Ends with You Friday Rotation: Persona 4 Golden > Saturnalia
VOD Uploads
Monday: The past Monday stream will be uploaded. Friday: The past Friday stream will be uploaded. Saturday: Beginning in July, a YouTube exclusive playthrough will be uploaded. These videos will follow the same game to completion, unlike the rotation we have with our streams.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
gonna be raw as fuck, since i haven't slept and my emotions are all over the place.
so, i found my old live journal. that's not the cringey part.
in it, i found the remnants of messages/other blogs of... "people," or maybe I should say, "characters" that I talked with during the time.
a tl;dr of this high school story is that, i'm pretty sure this girl in high school created a bunch of "friends" and role played them on their live journals/had AIM screen names for them. In particular, one was named "Eric" and... god this hurts saying out loud, or rather, typing it to the world, and she used this Persona to flirt with me/get my affection with this person via LJ and AIM. After 3 years of this, I pulled the plug on Eric separately, and kindly told this girl to fuck off cause I couldn't "deal with the drama of her and her friends." I have never spoken to this person since, and I hope to keep it that way.
I never got definitive proof, but there were a few red flags-- i rememeber my one friend got "Eric's number" from this girl, for me to discover she had it saved as her own number in her phone. The fact that Eric always had some reason we never could meet up. How fairy tale/fantastical their lives were and I never could be a part of it.
Why am I typing all this? Because discovering this live journal just opened up the flood gates of all this trauma that... I never fully processed. Or knew what to even do. I was 17-- we didn't even HAVE the word "Catfish" in our dictionary. Whenever the show later showed up, and coined the phrase, i was like "THAT'S WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO ME?!?!" Keep in mind, this is internet hay day, out law country, I had no resources to help verify any of what was going on around me... I just... trust what this person was typing on the screen, and what my friend told me IRL in High School/College.
Now here I am, searching through these old archives, trying to remember this story i buried away in my brain to protect myself. I'm finding the moment I first started talking to them... it was right after my jaw got broken my senior year of high school. And you know what this psycho bitch did as a hook for me, knowing I Was reading her Live Journal?
She gave one of these characters a broken jaw too. And i ate it up-- I sympathized, and I reached out to this "person" to send my condolences. She used my trauma to fucking lure me in. This guy was the "boyfriend" of "Eric," and I some how convinced myself "Eric" loved me.
As I dig through these archives, I see this character vague-posting about "this thing i can't talk about" and "he knows my feelings for him."
I was caught-- hook line and sinker, like a fucking catfish.
Funny how all these characters stopped posting around the same time, a year after I stopped communicating with that person from high school.
I know no one reads these long posts.
But this... this needed to be typed out.
I never vocalized this to anyone. Ever. Even the people who KNEW "Eric" and "Dave" and "John" in my core friend group. They knew of them bc i talked about them all the time... I was obsessed.
I thought I was in love. I told this figment of a girls imagination that I loved them. There's so much more to this story, and I'm actively forgetting/remembering it all at once... and i'm really going through it right now.
And that's completely fucked me up for a long time, guys.
#tank wayd#tank this was a little too real lmao#sigh#trauma#remembering your trauma is not fun#oh god this is dizzying to go through#scream into the void and it'll scream back
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
erm erm drop cringey pokemon thoughts pretty pls
FKDKSKAKQ EEEEEE IM GLAD YOU ASKED!
So like, first things first, my favourite pokemone is decidueye, mostly because when my friend got me into playing unite, he was the first pokemon I got (ignoring pikachu who is the default tutorial guy)
I named him Rowley cuz I like how Rowlet sounded lol
And I have a whole little world thought out for my persona and Rowley, specially how they met
Before I go on, I gotta clear up something. Unite is the only pokemon game I ever played, and not out of interest, I just 1. Was never allowed to and 2. When I was, it wasn't in my priority then and now I don't have money for it fksjsja
I loved pokemon growing up! But it was the "demon's" work, so like, yeah, my knowledge is very skewed, but I did run it back to my pokemon encyclopedia friend and they gave the thumbs up so yeah--
But basically, Salty, when she was aroumd 12, was struggling to get a pokemon compared to her other classmates, so she decided to venture out, at first, it was supposed to be on her own, but she wasn't allowed since she was too young, an older, for now, unnamed figure who I'm yet to fill the role of with a proper character, catches her and they join her in her journey.
After still struggling to find one after hours, they stumbl upon a Rowlet
She, before even approaching it, she made noise and called its attention on her, everything was still for a moment until a snack slid out of Salty's bag due the position she halted, they stared at it for a moment before the Rowlet jumped at it, grabbed it and flew off
Salty, irrationally, took chase as her guardian (imma call them that) yelled out for her to stop
Very dumb move but she was always very impulsive
She ran through foliage and rocky ground, calling for the Rowlet who did not hear her please, or simply ignored them
Eventually she lost track of him and was out of breath, body filled with tiny cuts and scratches. Her guardian eventually caught up, equally out of breath and comforted her as she noticed the girl's distraught look.
"Hey, it's alright, there are plenty other pokemon out there"
"Yeah, but it's the first we've seen in hours and it was so...cute...also it took my favourite snack! Can it even eat that?"
"Don't worry, that one specifically isn't bad for them, let's go back to camp and get you patched up."
"Okay..."
They go back, Salty gets patched up and she sits in the log they made to a makeshift bench where she had left her bag sitting while getting taken care of when she heard some rustling. She freezes and slowly glanced down at her bag, that looked heavier and fuller than before. A hand slowly reached down for it and gently opened it, and a gasp escaped her lips.
The rowlet she had taken chase to not moments before was resting in a pile of wrappers, stomach full and currently in a food coma.
She stared at it for what felt like forever, waiting for it to move and fly off again, but no such thing happaned, so she, without taking her eyes off of the bird as if it would disappear the moment she turned away, grabbed one of the pokeballs in her belt and used it on the pokemon, miraculously working, a smile began to build on her face.
"Guardian! Guardian! Guess what just happened!"
She stood up and ran towards her guardian who was fixing up their stuff to start moving.
This is just their backstory tho, I'm still planning her actual story, but their dynamic is very sweet to me
Clumsy, danger magnet girl and a bird who is only there for the food but actually really cares for his trainer
He acts like he doesn't care but is very protective of salty
"If she's gone, my free ticker for a buffet is gone too" he'd say if anyone understood him
Salty's also a bit sensitive so he's usually there to glare at anyone who dares step out of line XD
She'd probably give him a friendship bracelet and it would go something like this:
"If you don't want it I can take it back"
"No its mine now"
#salty rants#pokemon#salty answers#ask box#im not tagging more than that#this is pure cringe and i dont want mean people reaching me fkskska
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Komivergence Chapter 3 - Dark History Tour 1
Chapter summary: This chapter, things start to take a different turn... Tadano and Komi are dropped into a universe in which the two had yet to even meet. The title is your hint.
This is actually going to be chapter 4 eventually, but I'm skipping over the Komi Theft Auto Komiverse for the time being so that I can plan it out more... I also just have a stronger desire to write this one...
Click here to read the full chapter on AO3.
Click here to see all of my works.
A deeply unsettling chill ran down Tadano’s spine as he looked around and noticed exactly where it was he had just ‘dropped in’... He could run a marathon on the amount of adrenaline that started pumping through his system when the realization fully hit him.
Had it not been for the extreme mental fatigue caused by his current set of circumstances, perhaps he would have been okay with seeing this place again—he had a girlfriend now, after all—but there was no way of knowing that for sure. What he did know was that in this moment, he would almost rather die than return to ‘this place’...
It was his old middle school... Or, more precisely—its athletics field...!
It was exactly how he remembered it. In essence, it was nothing more than your standard, wide-open dirt field. A runner’s track had been laid out in chalk dust just recently, and so the lines were still looking neat, crisp and fresh...
Tadano started to feel a bit weak in the knees, so he squatted down low, with his feet perfectly flat to the ground.
He subconsciously clenched his teeth in shame over his weakness, and fought the slowly-rising urge to vomit his guts out as the events from ‘that day’ began to loop in his mind... The memories had long since crystallized in sickening detail, and they had become an inescapable part of his legacy... His ‘dark history’!
He could practically see the echoes of his younger self naively painting away with the school’s ‘field chalker’ (or ‘line marker’). It was a small piece of equipment on wheels that released chalk at a set thickness, and at an even rate. On that infamous day, he had used it to write the word ‘LOVE’—in English, no less—in the center of the runner’s track in big, bold letters... It was more than large enough to easily be seen from their classroom.
That was naturally a crucial step in his preparations for ‘Operation L’.
Later that same day, perhaps even a news helicopter might have seen it and reported on it for a fluffy, feelgood piece. Who knows?
...As the thoughts of that day continued their assault, Tadano covered and gripped his face with one hand out of reflex while his fight or flight response kicked into overdrive. It was a wonder he had not yet had a heart attack. He felt, more than anything, that he should not be there.
Could anyone blame him...? Setting aside the current matter of involuntary universe hopping... A part of him had died that day. And truth be told, he would have loved nothing more than to keep it dead... That old cringey, forced persona of his.
He marinated in his feelings of embarrassment and anxiety for just a few minutes.
...
Okay, that’s enough...
Tadano took in a long, drawn out breath in an effort to relax. He held it in for at least half a minute before finally lowering his arms, resting his elbows on his knees, and letting it all out slowly.
At least the sun on his skin felt nice... With his eyes closed, he lifted his face towards the sun and let out the last of his breath.
The initial shock was finally wearing off, and the gears in his head were gradually beginning to turn once more. He took several more slow, deep breaths to calm himself further so that he could think about this latest development more rationally...
He had quickly learned not to entertain such optimistic notions as him and Komi finally being back in their original universe. (Last time he did that he was met with a gun to his head, after all.)
...That was a traumatizing experience he would like to not repeat if at all possible.
This time was already shaping up differently, of course... And not merely for a lack of guns in his face.
This time, he was completely alone...
As he thought things over more carefully, Tadano finally understood the significance of his arrival at this place and time. It was not a knowing based on any tangible evidence, mind you, but rather a knowing that welled up from deep within his soul... Why else would I have dropped in here?
It was that kind of feeling.
He let out a deep sigh... His body lightly shivered despite the mild heat he was currently basking in. For the life of him, he could not fully calm his nerves.
Being alone in this moment was pure suffering.
This entire ordeal would have been so much easier if only Komi were there with him... but regrettably she was nowhere in sight. He had to keep telling himself that she had to be fine—that she was probably just in a similar situation right now...
Heck. For all he knew, she was probably just ‘home’ and trying to give some kind of explanation to ‘her parents’. Not to mention her middle school counterpart... He could scarcely envision how that might be going for her, but nonetheless it brought a sad smile to his face as he briefly tried to picture it...
Regardless of whatever she was doing in this moment, he just wished with all his heart that she could be standing there with him instead—or squatting, in this case. Failing that, he wished that she was at least safe.
Being separated, on top of being in another universe, was no trivial matter. He could not help but worry... What if they never saw each other again?
He shook his head. I can’t go thinking like that... In any case, let’s just get this over with already so I can go look for her. Where is ‘me’...?
Meanwhile, a short distance away—hidden inside a set of bushes—a middle school boy was carefully observing our protagonist.
He had been watching... waiting... for a little while now.
This was just what the boy needed... Of course it had to be now of all times, didn’t it...? A delinquent was squatting right where he needed to ‘get to work’.
He was fully prepared to enact Operation L—and in fact, you could say the operation had already begun! He had put a letter in his crush’s shoe locker earlier in the day asking her to meet him behind the school building after school... So the clock was ticking!
He had planned this out over a month in advance, even going as far as scoping the place out with his best friend Najimi.
...Tadano (C) was getting restless. Come on, man...
He was hoping that the delinquent would simply leave on his own, without any need of direct intervention.
The more he read the situation, however, the more he got this weird sense of familiarity with the delinquent. Do I maybe know this guy...? He couldn’t really tell, as the delinquent was facing the other way.
The delinquent seemed... ‘stressed’, to put it one way. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but that was the impression he got from the delinquent’s body language.
Before he even realized it, his legs had already started moving on their own. Normally he would avoid getting involved with someone else’s business, but for some reason he could not explain, he was drawn to this delinquent as if they were connected by fate.
As he closed the distance between them, he briefly felt a strange resonance course through his body. It was like a vague pulsing of energy that stretched beyond the physical plane. For him this was a first, and it was a very freaky experience to have out of the blue... But this was our protagonists’ third time that day. This feeling... So I’m really not an ordinary person...
His heart fluttered.
Our protagonist suddenly swept back his hair, and it stayed in place thanks to a thin layer of sweat.
Not knowing what to expect, the middle schooler anxiously stopped on a dime. There was only about 2 meters of distance separating them now.
Their hearts were both racing faster than either of them thought possible. Each for their own reasons.
Every fiber of Tadano’s being was screaming in horror at what he was about to do. If only it were as simple as shaking some sense into his doppelganger, and telling him that this was wrong... That he was just a normal guy trying in vain to impress the wrong girl...
He would have loved nothing more than to keep it dead... This old cringey, forced persona of his... But somehow he knew that this was the only way...
There was no guarantee that his counterpart would listen to him—even under these absurd circumstances—if he behaved like an ‘ordinary person’...
Besides... To begin with, in what way was this situation ordinary? Ordinary people do not travel across the multiverse, do they...? His embarrassing past aside, he could hardly ignore the uniqueness of his and Komi’s situation any longer.
With this as his justification, he ‘released the seal’, so to speak... If he wanted to strike this accursed moment from his dark history, then he had to do... ‘that’...!
Tadano slowly got to his feet, and unzipped the black leather jacket he had received from his doppelgangster (heh) before slowly turning to face ‘himself’. My shirt doesn’t have a dragon on it, but this much has to be enough, right...?!
“Yo, Hitohito...” Tadano said with a grin steeped in false confidence.
“Y... Yo...” Tadano (C) replied reluctantly... But as one might expect, his reluctance soon turned to excitement.
He’s just like me! He’s just like me, for real!
Read the full chapter on AO3.
Read from chapter 1.
#komi san wa komyushou desu#komi can't communicate#komi san can't communicate#komi san#fanfiction#komi#komivergence#komivergence 4#tadano hitohito#komi shouko#drama#progress#dark history#dark history tour
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
Pictures/Picrew: Wrow four
Sona art
Simping obviously
Simping existing yes
Doodles!
Doodles, mermaid Pirate edition.
Doodles, Underdew edition.
Angel art!
Redraw of art.
Senna art!
More Senna Art!
Art of AU
The Fallen Humans!
More Self-Ship Art.
Art be art
Two Fallen Humans moments!
Hair cut Willow
Hair cut Willow 2
Scars
More art!
Art because amateur
I hate that I hate you
I hate that I hate you (Scar Edition)
Osprey's Mom!
Arts. Cringey a bit, amateur.
"Eyes Don't Lie."
"Eyes Don't Lie." The Sequel
"Eyes Don't Lie." The Threequel.
Lutea
POV: You killed his brother Part 1
POV: You killed his brother Part 2
"There's one thing I could never forget… The absolute hatred in her eyes when she looked at me. Her cold eyes as she stared at me with no warmth left in them."
Hydra fights
Hollyhock (Holly)
POV: You're the female MC who she loves but you don't love her back.
H lost her mind and (Digital Art: Underdew Sona)
Persona Drawn
Primrose Drawn
Marguerite Drawn
Boronia (The Goddess of the Deep Galaxies)
Boronia Drawn
Redraw of a Redraw of a Redraw
Stay Determined!
Morte and Hepatica Eyes
Willow Drawn
Hollyhock Drawn
"Am I making you feel sick?"
Updated Primrose Drawn
Updated Ivy Drawn
Updated Marguerite Drawn
Butterfly
Princess Hydrangea Ref
Hibiscus Ref
Random OC: Alice by Peggy
Language of the Lost RIP: Embellia
Writing on the Wall
Lotus Ref
Embellia Ref
Angel Ref
Lobelia Ref
Aine Ref
Gaillardia Ref
When you don't have control over powers
Marguerite Fae Form
Ivy Fae Form
Ivy Sweater Dress
Eldritch Ivy Picrew
Old AA Character
Heaven Says
Marigold Ref
Echo (Four Sonas)
1 note
·
View note
Text
ReConnecting the Dots Part 2
Today I sat down in the car, and because I have been taking a break from news and radio, I set my mind on driving and tuning into my Ski lodge and its inhabitants.
I homed in on a decidedly Male presence, and began to sing, as I sometimes do, as an invitation to have them sing part back.
It's cute and stupid, and a thing we've always done. We're all music lovers. It just means different music, depending on who you talk to.
For a while, I had made very clear, strong boundaries about how my others and my gods would not be mixed up at all because it was confusing, and I wanted neat boxes because I was allowed to have certain kinds of relationships with these personae that came from Me, and I wanted to have certain kinds of relationships with the gods.
{Because who the hell do I think I am feeling like loving them is okay.}
At some point, I decided that it was very not okay or right or wise to have any kind of relationship involving emotion or attraction to or with a god.
Despite those things being very much features of my relationships with them for nearly 30 years.
It was a casualty of some gatekeeping here, I think. There were people I respected who said things about how those relationships should be, and should look, so I questioned them when I was vulnerable in therapy, trying and fumbling the construction of boundaries where I hadn't had them Ever before.
Like many things, when it comes to my own well being, I listened to what other people thought, even though it fucking tore my heart out, because what the fuck do I know about well being? I was ready to try anything.
I am historically known to violate my own boundaries and self harm to cater to others. It is cringey as fuck and co-dependent and terrifying because I didn't recognize it easily until I had the benefit of hindsight, and then I used it to kick my own ass up the road and back. I am sure the potential for this behavior still exists in me. But I have made great progress with this. (Thank you, humans of Tumblr)
One of the Main reasons I decided to Integrate the other people in my head was that I relied very heavily on them for positive social feedback and affection. I was very skeptical of my friends and co-workers and relationship partner. I didn't think any of them really wanted me, despite strong evidence to the contrary. I had a hard time seeing signs from real people, because I wanted and expected the signs and feedback that the people in my head had been giving me. It was not healthy. It turned me inward in a way that was making me miss some of the best things in my life. And I was aware it was happening, and the dissonance was incredibly distressing. Because I Loved my others, and felt loved by them in a way that I valued and understood. To turn away from that seemed suicidal.
But there was no way for me to be happy while I went on believing that the people in my life didn't really want me there. No way to keep believing that I was unwanted and that what I wanted mattered at the same time. I had made progress in therapy, and in much the same way you have to loosen the lug nuts on a tire in a certain pattern, I had to work on different aspects of my inner world in a pattern, so the whole thing could change gradually, and I didn't have to tear the whole wheel off the axle. Our stories and truths lean on one another. They are interdependent.
I have digressed... But pointfully.
I wound up in the arms of what I thought for a moment was Rath. But it turns out it was more complicated than that.
A moment later, I thought it was Loki.
And of course, they had Words for me.
Words about me being pretty graceful here lately, and me needing to be really fucking graceful here in a second.
And he then informed me that it was in fact the combination of Loki, Rath and Altherion.
This isn't a historically usual arrangement.
And it represents a direct violation of the Agreement I thought I had with Loki.
But There isn't any way it could be some kind of consent violation from the other two entities in question. They would be strong enough to say no if they meant no.
They pretty much had to be on board for the operation.
I had gone within with the expressed intention to try to feel into one of them. I had intentionally sought to connect, to understand why they were disconnected, and to figure out what I could do to re-connect.
And here I was confused and a little pissed instead. Definitely Not very graceful.
But I breathed, and tried to notice my feelings. There were an awful lot of them.
I WANTED them. I wanted to feel connected with them. But I also felt stubborn and a little mad. I also felt afraid, like it could just go badly, and I didn't know what it all meant. I was also mad at myself for wanting this, like I was judging my emotion as soon as I had acknowledged it was even there, as "not helpful".
I wasn't supposed to have or want this kind of thing for or with my gods. They were supposed to be over there in the safe god box that won't make other people angry.
I am not sure you could put Loki in a box. You'd Definitely have to get him drunk first.
Rath was one of my first experiences of self love. I knew why I felt the way I did about him... But I still have trouble feeling worthy of him, of that, because of things that happened a long time ago, and the judgements I have made about myself and those events. I pushed him away because I thought I had treated him badly, back when repair did not exist.
And Altherion is an Excuse to have a beautiful godlike twink introject wandering around my subconscious, exploring my most private thoughts and kinks. He's like some glorious self-created version of Loki that let me Have Loki in a very personal way that made more sense than having a God come to live in my mind. He went by the name Loki for a very long time, and it took a Long time for me to un-tangle who was who and what was what.
He didn't let me go.
I sat with my confusion, and mild distress.
Finally, I couldn't sit anymore and said what was on my mind, the doubt that made me place the boundary about relationships with gods in the first place. I asked why any god would want this.
He implied that I had implied he wasn't capable, which wasn't kind or realistic.
He said "Because we are all the same. I want this because our Stories are One, and there is no difference between any of us." I knew his statement included all four of us.
This echoes some stuff I kind of still believe about souls and energy and animism and the whole "you, me, rock and tree" notion that we're all made of atoms and charges and forces.
I was like "Yah. Okay." and I was still squinting, because this belief structure was notoriously suspicious, and possibly prone to abuse.
And then he said some fucking radically disarming words.
"I am here, because of Love and Belief. Because you love me and believe in me. Our Stories connect because I love you, and believe in you." Oh, the poetry, and double entendre.
When someone says something like that to you it is a net too wide to swim around. I could dredge up every scrap of denial and fear I own, and it wouldn't be enough to get out. The sheer, irrefutable truth of the words had caught me.
And I realize now, after the fact, that he was there to Teach.
He was there specifically to show me how to do Exactly what I wanted to do. Because he knew I needed help, And I had ASKED for it.
And I decided to be a little shit about it. Very on brand for me.
I was STILL fighting, but it was with that Inch, the inch I now associate with Theater-girl's Power. The power to separate to create safety. The very thing I wanted to Change.
So How would it feel to not feel this particular bit of resistance? If I took down exactly this wall, stopped resisting, fearing this thing, in this moment, How would it be?
And suddenly they were all separate, standing there in a group hug. And everything felt... fine. Safe. quite. okay. Soothing and done.
Like I finished the first step, and it was okay to stop there for now. Like there was no rush, and that this was a good start.
Maybe I am just supposed to be a system. Maybe I should seek to re-connect, for sure, but maybe integration isn't going to be the outcome.
Idunno.
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ahead there be
So I'm not sure I've ever laughed harder at the opening line of a story:
Matthew Murdock is a pervert.
lmaoooooooooooo cuz that's not the Matt I know? Granted, it's limited to the Netflix series and his appearance on She-Hulk, but like, that's not the dude I know so to click on a cut and be told that straight up? Amazing. Love it. Not a lot of the fanfic I read is comedy, and this definitely isn't either, but I love when a comedic line is tossed in here or there and this captures my attention and makes me wanna find out WHY / keep reading. Then the 2nd line is just as good:
Matthew Murdock, the fearless and fearsome Devil of Hell’s Kitchen, is a pervert, and he knows it, revels in it, and is not ashamed of it.
So again, expectation subverted because most folks I come across in the fiction I read would NEVER admit to being a perv, let alone take pride in that fact? I myself am quite repressed and do my best to keep my tendencies/preferences as tightly under wraps as possible out of FEAR of being judged. But apparently, Matt let's his freak flag fly and wants everyone to see so GOOD FOR HIM!
It was probably guaranteed from birth, probably written down somewhere in the cosmos with the headline Man Loses Sight, but Not of Your Clit.
Absolutely amazing line lmao "Man Loses Sight but Not of Your Clit" I promise you I'm going to be thinking of that for YEARS.
...you watch a movie as it leads you through a random storyline of twists and turns that includes a handsome hero, a damsel in distress, and a passionate, but horribly choreographed love scene that simultaneously makes you cringe and squirm at the heat that briefly runs through you.
I like the judgment here cuz I am the EXACT same way. Not just, like, with love scenes but fight scenes as well but ain't it annoying that even if it's cringey and awkward, it's still a turn on? lol
Matt’s ass is decidedly not flat, and it is yours to grab whenever you see fit.
As someone who appreciates a man's peach, I appreciate attention being called to this cuz I feel like Matt does NOT get enough credit for this attribute of his.
Out of the blue, your phone vibrates on your coffee table in front of you... The man always has a way of knowing when you're thinking of him. “I can smell you, you know,” he says the second the call connects, not bothering with a hello.
Talk about being SLAPPED in the face! Like, the way I would combust if the man I wanted greeted me like that?!?! Somehow melting into the couch from embarrassment before poofing into Thanos dust. LORDT, that is SO DAMN HOT!
Matt is one of the most eloquent men you’ve ever met, especially when he’s in front of a jury, smile and sharp words sailing throughout the courtroom in a display of confidence you know is sometimes forced. But even while he seems so put together in public, you know his real persona is someone who is a little rougher around the edges, and he’s not always one to beat around the bush when he has something on his mind.
Excuse the language but I effing love this SO MUCH cuz I feel like, with the Matt stuff I've read (which hasn't been a lot), there's rarely dichotomy explored. Here, we have public persona Matt who is well put together and unassuming but powerful when he needs to be versus private Matt who is a PERV-O and has absolutely NO problem saying exactly what he means, letting you know what he wants, and pursuing it (which can apply beyond the love life). It's SO GOOD, this is delicious, as Gordon Ramsay would say, "FINALLY, some good fcking food" when it comes to this character!
“I made popcorn. That's probably what you’re smelling, I guess.” “It’s definitely not the popcorn,” Matt remarks, and the voice sounds almost teasing as he refuses to tell you what he meant. Your eyes narrow suspiciously for just a moment. “What kind of movie are you watching?”
The way I would NEVER tell him lmaooooooooooo if he's gonna embarrass me, I'm gonna make him work for it.
"You could tell the actors just weren't into it, and the sounds they made were so fake and cringe-worthy." "Interesting," he murmurs, the sound low in your ear. "But obviously you still somewhat enjoyed it." Something in the way he says it causes your whole body to freeze, every square inch coming to an abrupt halt. The breath in your chest stutters, lungs almost refusing to move as your mind struggles to put things together. How would he know you– No. No. No. No.
Yeah. I'd die lol just die.
“Please tell me you were lying when you said you weren't talking about the smell of popcorn that’s wafting through my apartment.” “I think we both already know that’s not what I was talking about,” his voice has deepened exponentially as he replies, and it almost sounds like a growl. “But if that’s what makes you feel better, then sure, we can go with that.”
I wouldn't ever admit it in the moment, but as a reader? I LOVE that he's beating around the bush (ha!), teasing, drawing this out. The tension that's building has my jaw clenched and me hugging my pumpkin pillow TIGHT cuz I know I'm gonna have to scream into it soon.
"You'd be surprised just how much I can pick up on when I'm focused," Matt says bluntly before the tone of his voice changes into something more heated. "And I assure you that the way you smell when you're wet isn't something I'll ever be able to ignore now that I've had my mouth on you."
Ded. Ded, Ded, Dedski. 2nd combustion. I'm just now realizing that she didn't UNDERSTAND when he said he could smell her the first time, and I must be a perv cuz I knew EXACTLY what he meant as soon as he dropped the line lol
“Speaking of movies, do you know what we should try doing together?” “What?” You ask hesitantly, not sure if you actually want to hear his answer. “I swear to God, if you say something dirty, I'm going to–" Matt takes no pity on you, his reply absolutely salacious as it cuts you off. “Watching porn.”
Me reading this section
liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike holy hell. Sweating.
I don't wanna keep quoting the rest because OMG, the mouth on this Matt Murdock. I'm someone who REALLY enjoys dirty talk (I'm very aural), and the dirty talk in this fic is UNMATCHED. His ideas, the way he unabashedly describes in detail what he wants to do to her? Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike, y'all. You need to read this for yourself.
Understand I don't even read Matt Murdock stuff but this came recommended from @savemefromanepicoftimewasted and I trust her tastes even if they are for characters I don't read like that and BOY HOWDY! This story HITS!
"I'm a block away," Matt tells you, breathing sounding slightly strangled. "Do you think you're ready for me?" Your whole body is fucking burning.
LFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
I really wanna quote the end of the story because it's so eloquently and beautifully written, the picture Matt makes arriving, but y'all need to go read it for yourselves because it is *chef's kiss* 👩🏽🍳💋
I can't BELIEVE how much I enjoyed reading this story. It is a true testament to talent that it is SO HOT but so well written, descriptive, and delves into a character study of Matt Murdock all at the same time.
@courtforshort15 ? Brilliant work. Thank you SO much for creating and sharing. I've already come back to this one OFTEN and I really do appreciate you so much for publishing this one
Dirty Little Devil
Pairing: Matt Murdock x AFAB Reader
Word Count: 2,400
Summary: Matt Murdock is a pervert, and he is completely unashamed to admit it.
Trigger Warnings: Mentions of sex
Masterlist
Keep reading
#feedback#fan fiction#matt murdock#daredevil#marvel#animations#AND mine#trixie mattel#bob the drag queen#alyssa edwards
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Angel Reim'ul
A young dragon rider who bares the element of light and who's entire life and purpose was already chosen from the moment she was born. It's not by fate, but a pact created between her father and a dragon so his first born could create a partnership, a close bond, with the next born dragon if light, Cam'eire.
The sages of light who's purpose, among the other elemental sages, to reclaim the lands from a tyrant who has acquired a great amount of power and has grown a powerful empire.
She's friendly for the most part, but due to the stress and the weight that she constantly feels on her shoulders and how she was raised to take her role seriously, she's the kind to expect perfection out of herself and often feels unworthy, although she's very competent. Just tends to underestimate herself and what she is capable of.
She's wary of humans because of constant tensions between their kinds and doesn't easily trust them, but knows fair well she will have to work with them and does hold some hopes for a better future.
Through out the story, I want to focus a lot on her growth, on learning to trust others, to trust herself and her dragon will have a big role in bringing her confidence as well as her weapon mates. Once comfortable, she's friendly, easily amused, yet she is still duty bound and even if she feels constantly stressed out, she takes pride in what she is.
_____________
I'm still working on how I want her to be, I don't want to make her poorly written, but man I love her. I also need to practice my writing skills ngl
She is THE character I consider the main of a story I'm working on, all though their are several main characters. I put a lot of focus on her. She's also my first ever character, starting from being a cringey persona I made when I was 13 and becoming her own thing.
She holds a very important place in my heart, honestly.
Also, I just had to share this commission I had ordered on Skeb a few weeks ago with her dragon because fuck, man, it looks amazing
The art was done by Byakkok99 on Skeb, I will link it. It looked so god damn good I fucking cried ugly.
https://skeb.jp/@byakkok99
0 notes
Text
maybe the ghost hat was just foreshadowing all this time
27 notes
·
View notes