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[poweradspy]

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[pearlprincess02]

sour by olivia rodrigo (album astrology)

gemini sun in 4th house

as a gemini sun in the 4th house, olivia rodrigo's sour radiates a core identity centered around emotional vulnerability, exploration of duality, and introspection. gemini’s influence brings a dynamic, multifaceted energy to the album, allowing olivia to express a range of emotions, from heartbreak to anger, often through witty, sharp lyrics that resonate with the listener on an intellectual level. in the 4th house, the focus shifts inward, drawing on personal experiences, home, and the deep emotional roots of relationships. sour becomes a reflection of her inner world, expressing the emotional turbulence of adolescence and the growing pains of self-discovery. the album’s central creative focus lies in balancing vulnerability with clever self-expression, as olivia explores the intimate, often conflicting sides of love, betrayal, and identity in a way that feels both deeply personal and universally relatable.

"you talked to her when we were together / loved you at your worst, but that didn’t matter."

virgo moon in 8th house

with a virgo moon in the 8th house, the emotional depth and mood of sour is rooted in raw, analytical vulnerability, creating an intense atmosphere of emotional exploration and transformation. virgo’s meticulous nature brings an introspective and self-critical tone to the album, as olivia dissects her feelings of heartbreak, betrayal, and insecurity with precision and honesty. the 8th house amplifies this emotional journey by delving into themes of loss, power struggles, and deep inner change. the album connects to the listener’s inner world by expressing pain and vulnerability in a way that feels both relatable and cathartic. there’s a subtle, yet profound undercurrent of emotional healing throughout sour, as olivia's lyrics navigate the complexities of emotional wounds and personal growth. the album’s mood is intense, reflective, and transformative, inviting listeners to confront their own hidden emotions and experiences of heartbreak with a sense of clarity and raw honesty.

"it's bittersweet to think about the damage that we do."

capricorn rising with pisces jupiter & aquarius saturn in 1st house

as a capricorn rising, sour presents itself to the world with a serious, mature, and somewhat somber image, giving listeners the impression that the album is grounded in emotional realism and life lessons. capricorn rising influences the way sour is marketed—its branding leans into a minimalist, polished aesthetic, with visuals that evoke a sense of emotional weight and vulnerability while still feeling structured and deliberate. the vibe is one of quiet strength, as olivia channels her heartbreak through a lens of resilience and self-awareness. with pisces jupiter in the 1st house, there’s also a touch of dreamy emotional depth and empathy woven into this public image, adding a layer of artistic sensitivity and spiritual exploration to the album’s identity. meanwhile, aquarius saturn brings an unconventional edge, signaling that sour isn’t just a typical breakup album but one that challenges norms and reflects olivia's personal rebellion against expectations. this combination shapes the album’s first impression as deeply emotional yet disciplined, appealing to listeners who are drawn to both the rawness of youthful heartbreak and the wisdom gained from it.

"but if you're out there, i hope that you're okay."

gemini mercury in 5th house

with a gemini mercury in the 5th house, the lyrical content and communication in sour are marked by clever, playful wordplay and dynamic storytelling that reflect youthful creativity and emotional expression. gemini mercury thrives on sharp, quick-witted lyrics, which is evident throughout the album as olivia delivers lines that are both poignant and biting, capturing the complexity of heartbreak, jealousy, and self-reflection. in the 5th house, mercury's energy becomes more theatrical and expressive, making her storytelling deeply personal yet accessible, as if each song is a dramatic scene from her emotional life. the album's lyrics balance lightness and heaviness, often juxtaposing biting sarcasm with vulnerable confessions. this placement gives olivia a strong voice that resonates with her audience, connecting through her ability to articulate complex emotions in a way that feels authentic, youthful, and bold.

"it’s brutal out here."

gemini venus in 5th house

as a gemini venus in the 5th house, the aesthetic and harmony of sour are vibrant, expressive, and emotionally charged, with a playful yet complex approach to beauty and love. gemini venus brings a duality to the album’s sound, allowing for a mix of contrasting elements—delicate melodies paired with raw, angst-driven moments. this creates an ever-changing, multi-layered experience for the listener. the 5th house amplifies this with its focus on creativity and self-expression, making sour not just an album but a bold performance of personal emotions. venus’s influence adds a romantic and sensual touch to the music, making each song feel deeply intimate, whether it’s the bittersweet softness of tracks like "enough for you" or the fiery passion of "good 4 u." the melodies are often catchy and accessible, drawing listeners in with olivia's ability to blend beauty with emotional authenticity, creating a sound that feels both polished and raw, reflecting the album’s exploration of young love and heartache.

"do you get déjà vu when she's with you?"

cancer mars in 6th house

with cancer mars in the 6th house, the energy, drive, and intensity of sour is emotionally charged and deeply personal, yet grounded in everyday struggles and self-reflection. cancer mars brings a fierce yet protective energy to the music, with olivia channeling her emotions—particularly hurt, anger, and vulnerability—into passionate, assertive tracks like "good 4 u" and "brutal." while cancer is a sensitive sign, mars gives it a defensive edge, so the album feels like a cathartic release of pent-up emotions, particularly around themes of emotional betrayal and self-worth. in the 6th house, which governs routine and work, this mars placement emphasizes the dedication and emotional labor involved in processing heartbreak. olivia's intensity shines through in the balance between emotional outpouring and the meticulous effort to communicate her pain. the pace of the album alternates between raw aggression and more reflective moments, but there’s always an underlying assertiveness, making sour bold, relatable, and a testament to the emotional resilience born from everyday battles with heartbreak.

"well, good for you, i guess you moved on really easily."

all observations are done by me !!! @pearlprincess02

[old-daemon-farts]

Is daemonism safe?

Daemonism, when broken down to the bare minimum, is a mental and imaginative exercise. It's not meant to push yourself into anything potentially unhealthy. You are not forcing hallucinations and there shouldn't be any dissociation of identity or losing control of yourself.

Let's Start With Projection

Projection is applying mental images overlaid on your surroundings. It is using your imagination and relying on your ability to visualize outward what is being produced by your mind's eye. With practice, you can make your projections quite vivid, and after a while you may not even register that you are still seeing right through them. The apple exercise is a good example. Lets say you picture an apple on a plate in front of you, but the apple is fleeting and inconsistent. Its shape, colors, and size flickers rapidly or fizzles out entirely. You *know* it's not there. There's little presence or weight to it. If this was glass, it would be described as crystal clear. But, with practice, it becomes more consistent. You can now see one shade of red and the size remains the same. Perhaps you have even added details like a shadow. Now, if this was to be compared to glass it would be glass with a light tint added. You can still see right through it, but you also know something is there. You don't have to be a daemian to be able to project. Concept designers, artists, architects, althetes... projection is a type of visualization. It's a creative tool. It's not a hallucination, nor is it intended to be one.

Extreme vividness can be from hyperphantasia, but if you worry projecting may trigger or influence hallucinations then you are welcome to avoid it! Projection is fun, but not a requirement, and you should do what is most comfortable, healthy, and safest for you. Daemians who experience projection as hallucinations already have a history of them from what I have seen within the community.

Fronting and Dissociation

These are experiences usually seen within DID and other plural spaces. Daemonism doesn't focus on switching with your daemon, and you likely won't find resources specifically about it. Of course, you can switch who's in front, and some plural daemians may have advice for how to accomplish that, but again, that's not the point or focus of daemonism at large. They are usually hands off within our lives. We are the ones in the driver's seat while they are the backseat drivers giving us direction. They aren't expected to take the wheel from us. There isn't anything wrong with wanting to or being able to switch with your daemon, just to be clear. I'm only pointing out that getting daemons to front is not a priority like it is in other plural spaces. This is another reason daemonism is very easy to get into and something I consider much safer and easier to manage for the average Joe.

Dissociation isn't something that is associated with the daemon experience either. Dissociation *can* occur, but there are likely other reasons you would be experiencing these things and not just because you have a daemon. Dissociation from ADHD, stress, illness, or DID are just a few examples. Switching with your daemon could just be masking, or perhaps your mind is already comfortable sliding your daemon into front because you have DID. Again, if you are worried having a daemon could trigger dissociation or a loss of control then please do what is in the best interest for you. You know your health and history best. But, there a *many* daemians who are systems and quite happy and comfortable having daemons. Daemons have even been known to help with dissociation and sense of identity!

Talking to Yourself

Is 100% a normal, human experience. There's been a surge of exploration in self-talk and how it affects us, and talking to yourself in 2nd person even has proven benefits. You also don't *have* to talk out loud to your daemon; you can keep it all internal. Just know that splitting your own mental monologue into a dialogue isn't unhealthy and it's something many of you already do even without a daemon.

TLDR

You do only what you are comfortable with here. If something sounds risky, then don't do it. Daemonism is meant to be a healthy and fun activity.

You want to form find but not separate your daemon from yourself? Awesome.

You want to only talk to your daemon and avoid projection? Neato.

You want to project but not talk to your daemon? Perfect.

You want to learn how to switch with your daemon? We ain't really the community for that but you are free to if you are comfortable!

You do what's best for you. It's meant to fill whatever you need. Healthy mindset, growth, or just straight-up something fun to do.

Topic spawned from a question on Discord over the difference of imposition and projection as well as some differences between us and other techniques out there for headmate creation. Cleaned up and formatted better for Tumblr.

[bikenesmith]

haven't had much to say for The Death March of X, primarily bc it was mid + ultimately felt like a futile exercise outside resurrection of magneto . but the krakoa finale-funeral pissed me off. im too exhausted by the whole thing to muster emotion about what i and everyone else has discussed ad nauseam for months (corporate interests squashing creative storytelling, frankly insulting attempts at appeasing a mourning audience).

i'd already given up on squeezing any thematic cohesion out of this very slowly sinking ship but i wanted a crumb of cherik reunion, a crumb of old man yaoi, and they couldn't even deliver that!? copy-pasted/adapted from my twitter...

charles sold his soul for an idea he ascribed himself to because he and erik were doing it TOGETHER. but erik "deserted his post" & it all went to shit. yet here erik wrings his hands over choices his absence enabled + is somehow surprised that charles dgaf anymore? ridiculous

the split between krakoa cherik was not just about ideology itself. it was about emotions, and the emotions that krakoa wrought them. the guilt, pain, loss, exhaustion, the unbearable weight of responsibility... but no, please do waste the first pages they've had together in well over a year on erik blandly rehashing Xavier's Dream 2.0/This Is How Xavier's Dream Can Still Win

charles + erik are just people. they are not myths or paragons, no matter how often they pretend otherwise. they are not ideological idols or effigies. they are just flesh + blood — & they are their MOST fleshy + bloody w/ each other. i saw little of that in this issue.

ironically the exchange that seems the most "real" to me also aggravates me the most.

its like erik is on a complete other planet than charles here. how does erik not KNOW that yes, that IS all he has left??? it's a far cry from erik's implicit understanding of charles in x-men: red & resurrection of magneto

erik, who recognized the "no-place in [charles'] heart" long before anyone else did, is surprised to find said no-place swallowing charles up. and does nothing about it.

what did he mean by being "on his way"? on his way to do what? say nothing of substance + let charles lobotomize himself? LMFAO.

(despite dropping the ball on erik as well as erik in relation to charles, we did get some great solo charles moments.... this sums up so much about him perfectly, and also feels very connected to the ROM panel shared earlier. "desperate desire to be loved"....)

anyway i hope for better writing when charles is inevitably broken out of mega-prison and woken up from his mega-coma. that's really all i'm interested in w/ this blatant return to the status quo beyond storm's solo and jean's solo, which actually seem poised to be legitimately groundbreaking for both characters.

[varyathevillain]

did not want to negatively interact with the OP from whom I got this image, but this threw me into a fit of such incandescent fury that I had to talk about it, and I do not want to make others feel like they're at fault about something AJN said, about the implication (or outright possibility) of them being used for clout, or my own reaction to this. and I also will say, this is not an objective opinion. this is me, tired of this bullshit that keeps appearing in my life despite me repeatedly trying to move on.

what a fucking horrifying quote. this does not read as someone awkwardly relating to their audience to me. this is a rehearsed, researched 'funny guy' moment, scripted specifically to pander to people who would quote and reshare this moment, and it doesn't have the care or emotional attachment to the audience that many would ascribe it. this is a marketing strategy.

Alexander James Newall and his podcasting company have repeatedly in the past worked with companies like, for example, BetterHelp. in their case, Rusty Quill have been keeping the partnership and advertising it even after the FTC officially forced said company into paying settlement for breaking privacy agreements and selling customer data to third party services (such as pharmaceutical companies and other interest groups like Facebook/Meta), then the reveal of overcharging patients for subpar service, and repeated ethical violations within the company. you cannot say that this is an uninformed choice, since as a creative interacting with their fanbase via internet, especially as a multimedia practice (podcasting, youtube video creating, streaming etc), you simply cannot not learn about the scumminess and the actual legal issues of such a company. and it's not even 'oh, they did it only once' - people repeatedly complained about getting ads from AI training software companies, other 'mental health' help companies that turned out to also have AI training software, and on some notable occasions, a Noom app ad read, which is a weight loss app that 1) had also been in court reaching a settlement for tricking its customers, but for 'free trial' payments instead of selling their data, 2) had repeatedly been in hot water with health professionals about their diet practices.

and this is the company the face of which AJN presents. he is not a quirky fellow creative struggling for podcast space; he's a businessman running a company that is manipulating its audience with relatability, and it is working. he is not with you against the rich; he is the rich. and from what I am hearing and seeing, currently producing the main running show, the successor of The Magnus Archives, of a show that got critical acclaim and over 700 thousand pounds in kickstarter money to produce the 'sequel', only for that show to barely ever appear on anyone's radar outside of former TMA fans, to be quietly discussed as not being quite as coherent as its predecessor, and even outright criticised for the voice acting and issues with audio, where even interesting conversations turn into mumbled, inconsistent messes people can't really listen to without transcripts.

We Care What We Put Name To, in-fuckin-deed.

[simsyworld]

Here are some mods that are essentials in my game!

Delivery S&S " Healthy Foods" - download - @somik-severinka

This mod adds a delivery service of healthy foods that can help you sim meal plan. With these foods being healthy, your sim will lose weight

2. Family Life - download - @jellypawss

This mod adds new interactions, buffs, traits, aspirations, and more! This mod will shape your sim's child's future! (Ex: only child sims will be more creative and have harder time learning social skills.) - quoted by @jellypawss

3. The One Where They Are Friends - download - @katiemods

This mod adds venting interactions, emotional support interactions, chat interactions, and compliment interactions!

4. Maplebell's More Traits Mod - download - @maplebellsmods

This mod adds traits that are perfect for gameplay. Have a sim be shy, sexist, generous, unforgiving, warm hearted and more. Some traits are positive and some are negative, but that's where the realism comes in!

5. The One With The Loving Parents - download - @katiemods

With this mod you can praise your sim's child, give them reassurance, love them, and get to know you sim's child better!

6 . The One With All The Romance - download - @katiemods

As you can tell, I love Katie's mods for gameplay! This mods is everything you need to make your sims relationship more realistic. Argue about cheating, break up for falling out of love, communicate feelings, get to know your sim in a romantic way, say I love you for the first time, talk about moving in together, and SO many more interactions.

7. Life's Drama Mod - download

This mod adds 11 different dramatic situations that could happen around your sim starring NPC townies and adds a lively atmosphere in your sims neighborhoods. Increase your social popularity and help other sims with social situations, gain their trust and obtain their dirtiest secrets to expose them to the whole world. This mod requires wickedwhims for animations.

8. Life's Tragedies Mod - download

This mod your sim will now face tragic occurrences that would change their fates by adding dark twists and events. These events include Fatal Illnesses, Kidnapping, Serial Killers, Armed Robbers, Car accidents, and more... This mod definitely has made me cry a few times but is worth it for the realism! (sorry in advance for the loss of your sims...) This mod requires wickedwhims for animations.

9. Passionate Romance Mod - download

A great ending for my favorite realism mod's list. With this mod you can express your true feelings and love. It adds animations to show how much your sims love each other. This mod requires wickedwhims for animations.

I hope you find something from this list that changes the way you feel about the sims, as I wish these interactions were included in the game!

Happy Simming! - Simsyworld

[utilitycaster]

I agree what the cast says does not hold as much weight as what happens on stream. I think this is why I get frustrated by the 'Orym is to blame for Laudna killing Bor'dor' debates, using things Liam and/or Marisha have said on 4-sided dive that contradict the actual scene, where Marisha states Laudna barely notices Orym and Ashton, and *nothing* will stop her from doing what she wants to do. At worst, it's inaction. Have interviews and things like that always held so much weight in fandom?

I am absolutely the wrong person to ask here; I was not super in fandom when I was younger. I am going to, as I am wont to do, make some educated guesses but please take with a grain of salt.

I think there's a few things going on. A lot of people have told me that Glee was the first fandom they personally recall where it became about winning more than like, having fun and sharing ideas, and I wouldn't be surprised if that is at least an influence. (The idea that two ships that do not conflict and indeed have incompatible sexualities are in some kind of deathly serious competition is truly so baffling to me that I have to chalk up that particular bit of, if I may use a yiddishism here, mishegos, to Glee for sure.)

I also think that there was a time and there are shows where interviews did (or do) carry more weight, namely, those with executive meddling, or loss of creative control, or, notably, queer ships until quite recently. I have a lot of friends in the Star Trek fandom even though I'm not knowledgeable at all and from what I am given to understand, there's been a few ships squashed or delayed by executive whim or homophobia that the actors would pretty openly and consistently confirm at conventions. (The ones I know are Riker and Troi; and Garak and Bashir; but I have only hazy recollections of TNG and know NOTHING of DS9 so this is second-hand). I've talked about this before, but Word of God used to carry more weight for me when you simply couldn't have same gender romances on network TV or most mainstream film without risking your career. Now? You're a coward and a panderer.

Anyway I think with actual play specifically, which is improvised (ie, intent can shift dramatically and unexpectedly) and which has a lot of talkback shows and also a disproportionately huge amount of content people get in the habit of cherrypicking, and in extreme cases this turns into cherrypicking themselves straight out of the actual narrative and into microexpressions and OOC interviews and side conversations from three years ago.

I also, and I am too tired and too many drinks in (two drinks in, to be clear) to articulate this tonight, find that actual play in particular has amassed a certain fandom that I think was attracted to things I like and support (queer characters, women/queer people/POC creating and driving their own characters, independent creator-owned productions, improvised and therefore at times really unique stories, not needing to have streaming services in some cases) but also doesn't actually like Actual Play as a medium (see: every single D20 fandom meltdown low-key boils down to "I have zero genre awareness of both whatever is going on narratively and also I high-key loathe D&D as a means of storytelling and particularly the existence of violence in narrative, yet I am watching the Violent Narrative D&D show, so dance or me, my puppets, wait why aren't you dancing.") So I think you get a lot of people who are just making dumb fucking arguments because they decide what they believe and then poorly reverse engineer the support instead of doing things in the proper order and I think the people claiming Orym is responsible for Bor'Dor's death are in that category and we should stop treating them as people who are adding anything of worth to the conversation.

[msklassickilla]

Turning Tables a novella (5)

Summary: Janessa Davis lives for the drama—and she’s got a front-row seat to the wildest show on Earth: professional wrestling. As a reporter, content creator, and certified shit-stirrer, she’s earned a reputation for being the backstage wildflower everyone loves to hate (or secretly loves to love). Most of the roster can’t resist her probing questions and chaotic charm.

But the Bloodline 2.0? Oh, honey, they’d rather suplex her into next week than entertain her antics. Insults? Check. Threats? Double check. A few creative “Yo Mama” jokes? Let’s just say tensions are high, and Janessa isn’t exactly making friends.

She should probably quit while she’s ahead—but where’s the fun in that? Janessa loves playing cat-and-mouse, especially when she’s convinced she’s the cat. But someone in their camp knows the truth: she’s no predator. She’s the prey. And the Bloodline? They’re sharpening their claws.

There’s one man who might save her neck… or hang her out to dry. His loyalty is as questionable as Janessa’s filter, but he knows how far the others are willing to go to make her disappear. The real question is: how far is he willing to go to keep her alive—or keep his secrets hidden?

In a world where every feud blurs the line between fantasy and reality, Janessa’s about to learn the hard way: when the lights go out and the crowd goes home, the real monsters come out to play.

Pairing: Tonga Loa x Janessa (Nessa) Davis (OC)

Author’s Note: This begins right after the Bloodline 2.0 loses War Games ’24. I envision this happening over a certain period of time only focusing on major turning points, past and future. This is AU so it follows the timeline and certain events but not really.

Additional parts may be added..

Warning: None.

Disclaimer: This work of art is fictional in nature including the original characters created by me. I do not own any of the existing characters or lyrics from songs referenced in this story. All rights belong to their respective owners with the exception of my original characters. This work is purely for entertainment purposes and is not intended to cause harm.

If you wanna join the taglist for this story, just let me know! Taglist: @isabella-2025

Chapter Five: Fault Lines

The tension in the Bloodline’s locker room was so thick it felt like it could suffocate everyone in it. The air was heavy, weighed down by frustration, anger, and an undercurrent of despair. Tama sat on the bench with his head in his hands, his broad shoulders rising and falling as he tried to keep his temper in check. His frustration radiated in waves, an unspoken challenge to anyone who dared provoke him further.

Solo paced the length of the room like a caged animal, his movements sharp and erratic. His muttered words were barely audible, but the venom in his tone was unmistakable. Each step seemed to carry the weight of their failures, their losses, and the pressure mounting on his shoulders as leader. Jacob stood in the corner; arms folded tightly against his chest. His gaze was distant, but his clenched jaw betrayed the storm brewing beneath his stoic exterior.

Bronson, immobilized in his wheelchair, didn’t bother hiding his irritation. His booted, broken foot was propped up on a chair, a glaring reminder of their collective downfall. He tapped his fingers rhythmically against the armrest, the sound echoing faintly in the otherwise stifling silence.

Janessa lingered just outside the doorway, her back pressed against the cold wall. The muffled sounds of their voices carried to her, each one sharper than the last. She knew she shouldn’t be here, shouldn’t listen, but something compelled her to stay. A mix of curiosity and dread rooted her to the spot, her pulse quickening with each passing second.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Tama’s voice finally broke the uneasy quiet, his frustration erupting like a dam bursting. “You’re running us into the ground, Solo.”

“You think I want this?” Solo shot back, his voice edged with venom and exhaustion. He turned on Tama, his glare cutting through the tension like a knife. “You think I want to see us like this? I’m trying to keep us together!”

“You’re tearing us apart!” Tama’s hand slammed against the bench, the loud crack echoing through the room like a warning shot.

“Enough,” Jacob’s voice cut in, deep and commanding. He pushed off the wall, his movements deliberate as he stepped between his brothers. “This isn’t helping. We’ve got a match next week, and if we don’t get our shit together, it’s going to be worse than War Games.”

“Worse?” Bronson scoffed, his Australian accent biting and bitter. “I’m out for months, Tonga’s arm is screwed, and we’re a bloody joke right now. How much worse can it get?”

The silence that followed was deafening. Janessa peeked around the corner, her heart pounding as she took in the scene. Her eyes flitted to each of them in turn, seeing them not as untouchable warriors but as men grappling with the weight of their failures. For the first time, the invincible aura of the Bloodline felt like a distant memory.

Tonga walked into the room, his injured arm still in its sling. The muted sound of his footsteps on the tiled floor seemed to echo louder than they should have. The chatter stopped immediately, all eyes turning to him. Even in his weakened state, his presence commanded attention. His gaze swept the room, briefly landing on Janessa lingering by the doorway before moving on.

“What’s the problem now?” he asked, his voice low but firm. There was no anger in his tone, only a quiet authority that silenced the room further.

“The problem is him,” Tama snapped, pointing at Solo with a sharp gesture. “He’s driving this thing off a cliff, and he won’t admit it.”

Solo bristled, his muscles tensing as he stepped forward. “I’m doing what I have to. You think I like this? I didn’t ask to lead this group. But someone has to.”

“Maybe you’re not the right someone,” Tama shot back, his words laced with venom.

“Maybe you should watch your mouth,” Solo growled, his voice dropping to a dangerous register as he moved closer.

Before they could get any closer, Tonga stepped between them. His movements were deliberate, but there was no mistaking the tension coiling in his frame. “Enough. Both of you.” His voice was calm, but there was an edge to it that demanded respect.

He turned to Solo first, his tone steady. “You want to lead? Then lead. But this?” He gestured broadly to the room, his eyes briefly flicking to Bronson and Jacob. “This isn’t leadership. It’s chaos.”

Solo’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t respond. His shoulders squared, his anger simmering just beneath the surface. Tonga then turned to Tama, his expression softening slightly. “And you? Stop tearing him down. We’re all frustrated but fighting each other isn’t the answer.”

Tama looked away, his fists clenching and unclenching in a rhythm that betrayed his internal struggle. He exhaled sharply but didn’t push further.

Tonga took a deep breath, his voice softening even more. “We’ve been through worse. We’ll get through this too. But only if we work together.”

The room fell into a tense silence once more, but this time it was different. The anger had given way to something heavier resignation, perhaps. No one spoke as Tonga turned and walked toward the door, his steps deliberate and unhurried. Janessa quickly stepped back, pressing herself further into the shadows as he passed.

Later That Night

The hotel bar was dimly lit, the soft murmur of conversation mingling with the clinking of glasses. Tonga sat alone at the bar, nursing a glass of whiskey. The amber liquid reflected the faint glow of the overhead lights, his fingers curling loosely around the glass. His injured arm rested on the bar top, the sling a constant reminder of his limitations.

Janessa hesitated in the doorway, her eyes scanning the room before landing on him. He looked worn, the weight of the day’s events etched into the lines of his face. When his gaze lifted and met hers, his expression softened, and he gestured for her to join him.

Sliding into the seat beside him, she offered a small smile. “Rough night?”

He let out a humorless laugh, the sound low and bitter. “You could say that.”

The bartender passed her a drink without her asking—a subtle acknowledgment of how often she frequented spots like these. She took a sip, studying Tonga’s profile in the dim light. His jaw was tight, his gaze fixed on the whiskey in his glass.

“They’re spiraling,” she said softly, breaking the silence.

“We’re all spiraling,” he replied, his voice heavy. “This whole thing is coming apart, and I don’t know how to stop it.”

“You’ve done more than enough,” she said, her tone firm. “They listen to you, even when they’re too proud to admit it.”

He shook his head, his gaze unwavering. “It’s not enough. Not when I’m stuck like this. Useless.”

“You’re not useless,” she said, her hand brushing his briefly. The contact was fleeting, but it lingered in the space between them. “You’re the glue holding this together. They need you.”

His eyes flicked to hers, and for a moment, the weight he carried seemed to lighten. “And what about you?” he asked, his voice softer now. “Do you need me?”

Her breath caught at the vulnerability in his question. She looked away, the answer caught somewhere between her heart and her lips. Before she could respond, the bar’s TV switched to a breaking news segment. The screen showed footage of Solo and Tama caught in a backstage altercation, the brawl escalating as security struggled to separate them. The headline read: Bloodline Implodes: Trouble in the Dynasty.

Tonga’s hand clenched around his glass, the tension returning to his frame. Janessa felt the shift, her chest tightening. “This is bad,” she murmured.

“Yeah,” he agreed, his voice hard. “And it’s only going to get worse.”

The moment was shattered, and they both knew it. The precarious balance they had been walking was tilting dangerously, and for the first time, Janessa wondered if they would survive it—as a team, as lovers, as individuals.

She reached for his hand again, her fingers closing around his. “We’ll figure it out,” she said, her voice stronger than she felt. “Together.”

Tonga’s gaze softened as he looked at her, but the storm in his eyes remained. “I hope you’re right, Janessa. I really do.”

---

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[sororalice]

On The Blessedness Of Gratitude

A homily for the Full Moon on March 13, 2025.

Dearly Beloved,

Blessed Full Moon, my dear siblings. I greet you in the name of Aphrodite and in the name of the Divine on this vibrant night.

The Sun is in watery Pisces while the Moon is in earthy Virgo, a perfect time to discuss those moments that the Water in our heart wells up and overflows into action in the manifested realm of Earth. Thus I am moved to speak of those times we are touched by the goodness of the Other. Those moments that our feelings get so big they just have to come out in action.

I am moved to speak of gratitude.

For many of us it has been a difficult month since the the Moon was last full, as the weight of the political world combines with the weight of the economic world to bear down upon our backs. As part of my Lenten practice of fasting, I have been staying off of social media (except for my writing, of course), which has been a blessing (as fasting usually is). But even without that added psychic noise, the world is hurting and I can’t help but feel it. The world aches and I ache with it.

It is in these moments that I feel deeply drawn into my spiritual life. Despite the ways that the human world can burden us, we must remember that the human world is really only a small part of the world. All around us are the myriad animals, plants, spirits, deities, and forces with which we share the larger universe.

And that larger universe is amazing.

We are all in constant connection with every aspect of creation, an overflowing abundance of life and energy and change that is constantly in process, constantly growing and becoming something new. The Divine, the Source, the One, the Goddess, God, the Good, the True, the Beautiful, the Loving…all of these names are mere titles, fingers pointing at something so fundamental, so transformative, and so powerful that it literally moves and breathes through all of existence and beyond. The reality that all of those titles point at is so profound, that light so clear and ever-present, that, ironically, it’s easy to forget about entirely. Like anything else that is ubiquitous, that divine presence is easy to overlook.

In his mystical science fiction novels “Ubik” and “VALIS”, the legendary author and mystic Philip K. Dick shows us a vision of the Divine that conceals Themselves in the background of the world. A creator that hides in the unnoticed trash on the ground. A deity—which PKD calls “Zebra” at one point—which lays concealed as the Ground Of All Being, lost in the background, but an ever-present witness to the play of Their children. Always informing reality, always giving Themselves to us, always granting being and energy, matter and motion, to us all.

Like I said, amazing. Breathtaking. Awe-inspiring.

When I think about this, when I think of myself as what I am, a simple-minded and silly ape who is made out of light shed by the Divine, I am filled with wonder. When I look at my amazing wife or see the simply wonderful stray cat that wanders my neighborhood, I see that same light behind their eyes. I see the Zebra hiding in the grass, the Divine masquerading as the litter on the sidewalk, the Ground Of All Being in the background of the world. I see the Divine behind every face, and I am overwhelmed with the recognition of how lucky we are. We live in an universe of love and abundance, of life and warmth. Yes, there is pain and loss and entropy and death and the vast emptinesses of space, but in the midst of that, so much wonder! So much life! So much beauty!

So let us look out at this big, wide, amazing universe filled with light, life, love, and liberty and recognize how blessed we really are. Let us recognize the Zebra, the Divine One hidden everywhere in the background, the abundant, exuberant, and infinitely creative Ground Of All Being that has brought us all into existence and sustains us in that existence.

Let us be grateful.

Blessed Full Moon, dear ones.

In love,

Soror Alice

Art: Paul Gauguin, “Maruru: Offerings Of Gratitude”, (1893-1894)

[whoawardwinchester]

A Winchester Chronicle

Please consider liking, commenting, and reblogging. It fuels the creativity and lets me know you're enjoying my hard work.

Summary: You arrive at the audition for the role of Raven, your first acting job ever, feeling a mix of nerves and determination, reflecting on the loss of your husband and children in a car accident a year ago. Your performance impresses the casting directors, including Jared, Jensen, and Misha, leading to additional chemistry readings where you grow more confident. Jensen surprises you with a final, impromptu test that involves an unexpected kiss, solidifying your connection. Officially offered the part, you leave with a sense of hope and excitement for this new chapter, despite your lingering grief and medical challenges.

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader

Content Warning: (subject to change per chapter as this series is written) This chapter includes references to grief, loss of loved ones (spouse and children), medical conditions (PCOS and endometriosis), mild language, and a kissing scene. Please proceed with caution if these themes may be triggering.

Rating: 18+ for the whole series.

This is a work of fiction. There is no hate for anyone in real life.

If you want to be added to the tag list for this series, just let me know! Also be sure to tell me how I'm doing or request anything related to Jensen/Dean!

Masterlist

Season 4 (each season will have about 22-23 chapters, except S4 only because I have to set the storyline into motion. Otherwise, it will follow the episodes of Supernatural, with adjustments as needed.) :)

Chapter 1: A New Beginning

You woke to the muted light filtering through your bedroom curtains, casting soft shadows on the walls adorned with framed photographs of happier times. You stretched, movements slow and deliberate, as if testing the weight of the day ahead. The morning air held a chill that clung to your skin, a stark contrast to the warmth you once knew.

In the corner of the room, a small desk cluttered with scripts and audition notes stood as a testament to your newfound pursuit. You had always been drawn to the arts, finding solace in the rhythm of words and the emotion they could evoke. Yet, it was here, in the aftermath of loss, that you sought a fresh start.

You padded across the creaky wooden floorboards in your favorite pair of well-worn Converse, the soles barely making a sound. Your attire was casual, comfortable: yoga pants adorned with intricate New Age symbols and a loose-fitting T-shirt that you had acquired from a thrift store, its faded logo a testament to its previous life. A gold nose ring gleamed faintly in the morning light as you brushed a strand of long, layered, wavy auburn hair behind your ear, your blue eyes scanning the room with determination.

At just five foot three inches tall, you possessed a curvaceous figure that spoke of strength and resilience, qualities you hoped to channel into your upcoming audition. Your mornings had become a ritual of preparation and anticipation. Today was no different. Today, you had an audition—a chance to breathe life into a character named Raven, a role that whispered of mystery and strength.

The path that led you here had been winding and unpredictable. Once, you had been a stay-at-home mom to three lively children -days filled with laughter and chaos, evenings with bedtime stories and lullabies. But life had a way of shifting beneath your feet, leaving you adrift in a sea of uncertainty after a tragic car accident had taken not only your husband, but all of your children, too. In the quiet moments, when grief threatened to overwhelm you, you clung to the hope that this audition would fill the void, give you a purpose beyond the emptiness that echoed in your heart.

As you reached for the script on your cluttered desk, your fingers brushed over a delicate tattoo on your wrist—a small, elegant design that you had inked as a reminder of the love you had lost and the strength you had found in its wake. You took a deep breath, steadying yourself for the day ahead, your mind racing with lines of dialogue and the anticipation of stepping into Raven's shoes.

Today, you were not just preparing for an audition; you were reclaiming a part of yourself that had been buried beneath sorrow and doubt. With each page turned and each word spoken, you hoped to breathe life into Raven, to find solace in storytelling, and to discover a new beginning in the world of acting.

As you gathered your script and headed out the door, your thoughts lingered on the possibility of forging new connections in this unfamiliar world. In the casting rooms and on set, you hoped to find companions who could share in your journey—new friends who might become as close as family, offering support and laughter along the way.

You arrive at the audition with just 4 minutes to spare, thanks to traffic. Adjusting your hair in the mirror one last time, you take a deep breath to steady your nerves. Standing outside the casting room door, you clutch your script to your chest. The hallway buzzes with other hopeful actors murmuring lines under their breath. A stage assistant calls your name, and you step forward, heart pounding.

Inside, the casting directors sit behind a long table, scrutinizing your every move. You take your mark, trying to ignore the bright lights and the camera lens that seem to magnify every imperfection.

"Whenever you're ready," one of the directors says with a reassuring smile. It isn't until he speaks that you notice Jared and Jensen, along with another man you don't recognize, also watching you. That isn't nerve-wracking at all.

You nod, clearing your throat, and launch into your prepared lines. You stumble at first, the words catching in your throat as nerves threaten to overwhelm you. Closing your eyes briefly, you mentally push away the doubts. Remembering your months of preparation, you steady yourself and begin again, this time with more conviction.

As you deliver your lines, you focus on the character's emotions, channeling your own experiences into the performance. Your voice grows stronger with each sentence, and you feel a flicker of hope as the casting directors lean forward, nodding appreciatively.

After what feels like an eternity, the scene ends. You stand there, heart racing, waiting for feedback. The directors exchange a few murmurs before one of them speaks up.

"Thank you, Y/N. That was great. We'll be in touch about callbacks."

You nodded, feeling a rush of relief mixed with lingering nerves. You thanked them and walked out of the room, replaying every moment of the audition in your mind. You couldn't help but wonder if they noticed the slight tremble in your hands or the flicker of doubt in your eyes.

Your mind buzzed with the intensity of the performance as you reached your car. Exhaling slowly, you tried to shake off the nerves that had built up over the past hour. Glancing at your watch as you unlocked the car, time seemed to slow down in those tense moments.

Suddenly, footsteps approached from behind. Turning, You saw Jared walking briskly towards you, his expression friendly yet unreadable. Your heart skipped a beat. Was he about to deliver the news—whether you had made the cut or not?

"Hey, Y/N!" Jared's voice cut through the noise of the parking garage.

You managed a smile, trying to hide Your nerves. "Hey."

Jared grinned, kindness reflecting in his eyes. "We wanted to ask you to come back in for a moment. We have a few more things we want to discuss."

You blinked, your pulse quickening. "Oh, sure. I'll just—I'll be right there." You followed him back towards the audition room, your mind racing with possibilities.

As you both entered the room, you found yourself facing the casting directors once again, who looked up with mild surprise. Jared and Jensen exchanged a knowing glance before Jensen spoke up.

"We just wanted to say, Y/N, that we loved what you brought to the character today," Jensen began, his voice sincere. "You really stood out, and we think you could be perfect for this role."

Your heart leaped with hope, breath catching in your throat. It was hard to believe what you were hearing—after all the hard work and nerves, it seemed like your dream might actually be within reach.

Jared chimed in, his smile warm. "We're looking forward to seeing more of what you can do. Are you up for that?"

You nodded, eyes shining with gratitude and excitement. "Absolutely. Thank you so much for this opportunity."

The casting directors nodded in agreement, clearly impressed by the support from Jensen and Jared. "Alright, then. Let's run some chemistry scripts with Jared. Then we'll make our way to Jensen, and Misha after," one of the directors said, pointing to the papers on the desks.

You picked one up and read your lines with Jared. He was a natural, and his kindness made the process easy.

"That was great, you two," the director noted, making a mark on his script for the writers. "I don't think Raven is Sam's love interest right now, but as friends, it's perfect for the start of Season 4."

The writer, scanning her notes, chimed in, "Yes. Do you want to try Misha before Jensen?"

The director considered her suggestion. "I think that would be best. Misha, Jared, swap places please," he instructed, glancing at Misha in a scolding manner. "Misha, read your lines this time."

"Let's see how mad I can make them this time," Misha whispered to you as he took Jared's place.

You giggled, imagining the fun Misha, Jared, and Jensen had on set. "This will be my first season, too," Misha added as you both started your script reading together.

Misha finished with a dramatic flourish that made you laugh out loud. "Your laugh is the sweetest I've heard all day!" a producer exclaimed, taken aback. Your grandmother had once described your voice as 'sparrow-like,' often the center of compliments.

"Thank you, Misha! I don't think we need to do a chemistry reading with Jensen, unless… Jens - what do you think?" the producer continued.

Jensen had been very contemplative while he watched both of the previous readings, his expressions hard to read. "Yep. Let's do this," he finally responded after a few more long seconds of pondering.

Jensen helped Misha off the floor, "Dude, you've got to chill out," he joked. "Never," Misha responded, making his way back to the tables.

As Jensen passed by you, a whiff of his cologne caught your attention. It was warm and inviting, though not to say that Jared or Misha smelled bad—they just didn't draw your senses like Jensen did. His scent reminded you of a cabin on a rainy fall day, a surprising association that distracted you from realizing the chemistry reading had already begun.

"This is where you say 'DEAN WINCHESTER…'" Jensen motioned for you to deliver your line. "I'm so sorry. May we start again?" you asked, feeling shy and noticing your warm cheeks betraying your embarrassment. "Yeah, we can," Jensen replied. "Ready?" you asked nervously. "Have been all day," he smirked.

As you neared the end of the reading, you and Jensen reached a part where Raven and Dean were supposed to kiss passionately. Jensen suddenly stopped. "I believe we've captured the chemistry between Raven and Dean. The rest isn't necessary today," he announced, glancing at the panel, who seemed on the edge of their seats. "I don't think we saw enough," Jared joked, nudging Misha lightly. "I concur, Jared. Dean and Raven sitting in a tree… K-I-S-…" Jensen cut him off with a growl as his watch rang with a woman's name displayed.

"You're all free to go. Y/N, I'm pleased to welcome you to the Supernatural family. Congratulations!" the director said. Everyone shook your hand and wished you well on their way out, except Jensen, who was still on a heated call.

"No, I told you I was working late today. We had a new role to fill, and it was crucial that I was here for it," you overheard Jensen say. "I didn't think it was appropriate for us to be working together every day for the next God-knows-how-long," he added.

Realizing this was not a conversation you needed to witness, you quietly started making your way out.

"No, hang on…" "Y/N, wait just a sec." You nodded at him. "Yes, that's her name… Why would her name matter? … Ok. I'll talk to you later. Bye." Jensen hung up.

"Thanks for waiting. I have your schedule here. I specifically asked to give it to you so I could walk you out," he said, gathering his things and handing you a stack of papers. "Of course, if you lose these, you should have them in your email, so don't worry if you do." He pushed the door open and held it for you. "Great. Thank you," you said, scanning over the text.

The walk was silent for a few minutes. You frantically thought of something, anything to say, but all that filled your mind was how rugged he looked from the side. He caught you glancing at him. "What's up?" he asked, smiling.

"I… Uh… Was just thinking about your cologne. It smells familiar," you lied, mentally chastising yourself. What the hell were you thinking?

"Oh, it's Mountain Man by Dior, I think. Or is it Ralph Lauren? It's one of those two," Jensen chuckled.

"It's lovely," you let slip, feeling sheepish. Seriously, Y/N? Lovely? You were a fool, and you knew you'd be ruminating on this later.

"Thanks. Is this your car?" We were the last ones in the parking garage. You glanced at your watch; your audition was at 2, and it was already 11:30. Your stomach growled.

"Yeah, it is. Man, how did time fly so fast?" you said, unlocking your trunk to stow away your belongings.

"Yeah, today flew by," Jensen agreed. "Go grab some grub. There's a diner about three blocks from here that's open all night. Super handy for days like this," he said, turning as if to find his own car.

"Perfect. I appreciate you walking me out," you said, holding out your hand. "It was great to meet you," you beamed.

He shook your hand. "Likewise. See you in two weeks," he said, turning towards his car as you got into yours. Rolling down the window, you turned the radio up a little, taking a moment to sigh and process the day, leaning back into your seat. "Oh. My. God!" you whispered excitedly.

"Hey, one last thing…" Jensen appeared at your window. "AHHHH!" you screamed, heart thudding wildly in your chest.

He opened the door and took your hand to help you out. "I'm so sorry," he laughed as you clutched your chest, breathing through the scare. "I… I was just practicing, you know," you said jokingly to hide your embarrassment. "What's up?" you added.

"I know it's been a long day, and we've already done our reading together, but I figured if you had any questions you could text or call me. I also just need to see something," he said, stepping closer to you as he handed you his number. "Oh, Thank you. Let me just grab the scripts…" you began, turning towards the trunk.

He took your hand and gently pulled you closer, your face at chest level. Looking up, you saw his bright green eyes, intensified under the garage lights. "I don't know what…" you started.

"I just NEED to see… something," he interrupted softly, leaning towards you.

His lips met yours as he cupped your face in his hands, gently pinning you against the car. You moaned involuntarily. His lips were soft and tender as he pulled away, leaving you in shock. Clearing your throat, you managed, "I… um… hm," looking at the ground and shaking your head lightly.

"I didn't think it was necessary to see if we had physical chemistry in front of everyone. They'll see enough when we film through the seasons," he said, stepping back.

"Right. Thank you. That would have been… nerve-wracking," you said, sweeping some hair behind your ear. "Well? Feel the chemistry?" you joked nervously.

"I certainly felt something," he smoldered, turning away and waving. "Good night. Again!"

You watched him walk around the garage corner, finally comprehending what had just happened. It certainly didn't feel like just a chemistry reading, but you couldn't afford to think like that. You needed to stay professional. It had only been a year since your husband passed, and you still cried often about his absence. Guilt rose in your gut.

"Just get home, Y/N," you said to yourself, climbing in, saving his number in your phone, buckling up, and backing out. "Get home and breathe."

______

As Jensen navigated the familiar Vancouver streets, the soft glow of streetlights cast fleeting shadows across his face. His phone, propped up on the dashboard, displayed the faces of Jared and Misha on a group video call. The signal occasionally weakened, causing their images to pixelate.

“Jens, spill the beans,” Jared grinned widely. “What did you think of Y/N today?”

Jensen paused, thoughtful. “She was… impressive.”

Misha, in mock seriousness, chimed in, “Impressive? Come on, give us the juicy details. Did you kiss her after we left?”

Rolling his eyes with a small smirk, Jensen replied, “No, Misha. It was a chemistry test. You know how it goes.”

“But seriously, dude,” Jared leaned closer to the screen. “She seems like she'll be a great addition to the cast.”

Jensen nodded. “Yeah, she does.”

“Ah, so she's officially a part of the family now. Welcome aboard, Y/N,” Misha grinned.

“Yeah, welcome aboard,” Jensen echoed, a genuine smile on his face.

Misha couldn’t resist teasing. “So, when's the first scene together? I'm looking forward to seeing some epic on-screen chemistry.”

“We'll see how it goes,” Jensen chuckled.

Jared’s curiosity peaked. “Speaking of chemistry, how's Dee taking it? Is she excited?”

Jensen hesitated, a flicker of discomfort crossing his face. “She… wasn't thrilled.”

“Oh, jealous, is she?” Misha raised an eyebrow in seriousness.

“She wanted the part. Thought it would be a good fit,” Jensen sighed.

Jared’s voice was sympathetic. “It's tough when expectations don't match reality.”

“Yeah,” Jensen nodded, a hint of sadness in his eyes.

The conversation shifted back to lighter topics, with Jared and Misha sharing stories about their own auditions and the day’s events. But in the back of Jensen’s mind, thoughts of Y/N lingered. He couldn’t deny the connection he felt during their audition and wondered how their dynamic would evolve on set.

As he turned onto his street, Jared and Misha got off the phone buzzed with a text from Y/N, thanking him for his support and expressing her excitement to join the cast. He smiled, typing a quick reply before pulling into his driveway.

Just as he was about to open the front door, it swung open. Dee stood there, arms crossed, a tense expression on her face.

“How was your day?” she asked, though her tone suggested she already knew the answer.

Jensen forced a smile. “It was good. Y/N got the part.”

Dee’s eyes narrowed slightly. “So I heard. Everyone’s talking about how great she was.”

“Yeah, she really was,” Jensen replied, keeping his tone neutral.

Dee sighed, clearly frustrated. “I just don't understand why I wasn't right for it.”

“Dee, you’re a great actress, but they were looking for something specific. Y/N just happened to fit that.”

“Or maybe it’s because she’s the new shiny toy,” Dee muttered under her breath.

“Come on, don’t be like that,” Jensen said softly, reaching out to her.

Dee pulled away, her expression hardening. “I just hope this doesn’t change things between us.”

“It won’t,” Jensen assured her. “She’s a colleague, that’s all.”

“Yeah, well, we’ll see,” Dee said, turning away. “I’m going to bed.”

Jensen watched her go, a knot of worry forming in his stomach. He couldn’t shake the feeling that this was just the beginning of a much larger conflict. With a heavy sigh, he headed upstairs, hoping tomorrow would bring some clarity.

_____

You sit on the edge of your bed hastily scarfing down a cheesesteak from the diner Jensen mentioned, the glow of your bedside lamp casting a warm light over your open script. You glance at the lines you have been practicing for weeks, feeling a mix of excitement and anxiety. The day had been a whirlwind, from the nerve-wracking audition to the unexpected chemistry reading with Jensen, and finally being told you got the part.

Your heart swells with joy as you replay the moment the casting director said, "Welcome to the Supernatural family." This role is more than just a job; it’s a lifeline, a chance to reclaim a part of yourself you thought you'd lost.

But as the adrenaline fades, the familiar ache in your lower abdomen returns, a reminder of your ongoing battle with PCOS and endometriosis. You press a hand to your stomach, closing your eyes briefly to push through the discomfort. This is not the time to let your condition get the better of you.

A tear slips down your cheek as your thoughts turn inward again. You reflect on the last year—losing your husband and children in that devastating car accident. The grief had been overwhelming, leaving you feeling adrift, your identity swallowed by the roles of wife and mother that you no longer played.

But now, this role, this chance to play Raven, feels like a new beginning. It’s an opportunity to step into the spotlight and rediscover yourself. It won’t be easy. The long hours, the physical demands, and the inevitable moments of self-doubt will test you. But you are ready.

You think back to the audition, the look in Jensen’s eyes when he had watched you perform. There was a connection there, a spark that made you believe you could truly bring Raven to life. And even though you sensed some underlying tension, perhaps from Jensen’s personal life, you felt confident you could create something incredible together on screen.

You take a deep breath, your determination solidifying. You are ready to face whatever challenges come your way, both on and off the set. You have your own dreams to pursue, and now, a new family in the Supernatural cast to join.

You pick up your phone, scrolling through your emails until you find the one from the casting team with your schedule and initial scripts. As you read through it, you feel a renewed sense of purpose. You are doing this for yourself, for the memory of your husband and children, and for the part of you that has longed to be more than just a grieving widow.

Closing your eyes, you send a silent prayer of thanks. This is your chance to shine, to show the world—and yourself—that you are capable of great things. You won’t let your medical conditions, your past, or your fears hold you back. This is your time.

With one last glance at your script, you take some pain relievers, turn off the lamp and lay down, the excitement of the day slowly giving way to a peaceful determination. Tomorrow, you will begin this new chapter of your life, ready to face whatever comes your way. And with that thought, you drift into a deep, restful sleep, your dreams filled with the promise of what is to come.

[starstruckbyacomet]

Body positivity takes backseat as fashion houses pick skinnier models

There are several interesting points in the article which caught my eyes:

1)) As Ozempic and its counterparts become more commercially available for aesthetic purposes, it has pushed the body positivity movement to the backseat.

Enrika, a 28-year-old plus-size UK-based model. Source: Instagram.

2)) Enrika, a 28-year-old plus-size model, told the BBC that brands sometimes often use tactics in campaigns to virtue-signal being inclusive - such as highlighting stretch marks on plus-sized models, whilst airbrushing them on others. She said: "It sends the message that 'We don't actually think you look as good as the slim models in our skirt. But we accept you because we are such kind-hearted good people, so please give us your hard-earned money', it's nasty work and I don't support it."

Shaun Beyen, casting director for Fursac. Source: Knack Weekend.

3)) Shaun Beyen, casting director for iconic French brand Fursac, told the BBC: "The only motivation for a brand is to sell clothes - that's it. I don't think we need to lie about this. Brands adopted body positivity in the 2010s because in part they saw it as a commercial opportunity, and when they saw it was no longer performing as they would hope in 2020, they hopped off."

Gauthier Borsarello, Fursac's creative director. Source: Yahoo.

4)) Beyen added: "Full transparency - I don't really want to see clothes on someone like me. I want to see it on somebody I aspire to look like." Gauthier Borsarello, Fursac's creative director, laughed in agreement and said: "I hate my body. I don't want to see clothes on people like me."

5)) If you want change, change your buying habits. At least, that's what Shaun Beyen, believes: "Everything is consumer-driven. It's this kind of vicious circle. Every fashion house gives their version of what they know the customer wants, it's their interpretation and it's up to the consumer." Gauthier Borsarello said: "There's a famous French saying: 'If people stop producing, people will stop buying.' But the inverse is true. If people stop buying, we stop producing. No-one is forcing you to do anything. It's an education of the customer: In a polite way - educate yourself."

************

Left: Shaun Beyen, casting director for Fursac. Source: Getty Image. Right: Gauthier Borsarello, Fursac's creative director. Source: Fursac.

As the casting director and creative directors of Fursac, Shaun Beyen and Gauthier Borsarello surely have enough money to afford Ozempic and its counterparts. As you can see in the above pictures, they also have achieved what most people think as the ideal body-shape, a.k.a. not overweight. Yet, both admitted that they don't like their own body. I'm sure people like them are common in the fashion industry.

Fashion trends are created by people who have money and access to various weight loss medicine, experts, and tools. Yet, they still don't like their own body, and are still aspiring to achieve their ideal body-shape, someday somehow. They don't create those clothes to look good on us, the commoners. They don't even think they look good on those clothes themselves. So, why should we buy those clothes? It's better for us to forgo the trend and only buy clothes that objectively look good on us, regardless what the fashion houses dictate.

[365sylviaplath]

Week of 12/9-12/15

astrology forecast + collective tarot card for the week

Card for this week: Temperance (reversed) - you're feeling out of balance this week, pointing to a need for re-alignment in some flavor. what can you do to get yourself back into balance after the last few weeks? what can be done to prioritize your health and wellbeing (emotional/physical/spiritual) when you're feeling overwhelmed or out of control? what can bring you back to yourself?

Transits/Astro forecast: last week was mayhem! we're chilling out a slight bit this week. carrying out and wrapping up many hectic energies, so definitely not "chill", but fewer New transits. mercury retrograde is finally wrapping up, a full moon this weekend and the last full week of sagittarius season - ride out these lingering emotional ups and downs, as we'll be leveling out soon. as the weekly card mentioned, you may be feeling the weight of these ups and downs, and it'll be important to focus on self-regulation tools this week. current retrogrades are mercury (until sunday), jupiter, chiron, and uranus.

thursday 12/12 - venus opposite mars rx, mercury rx sextile venus - venus getting challenged today.... generally: passion, intensity, drive, romanticization and need to share these feelings with our loved ones, with the added twist of The Retrogrades. emotions may run every which way, self soothe where you can! create something beautiful! the last time venus opposed mars was 12/1/22, so we continue to reflect back on the end of 2022 (last mars retrograde timeframe as well). creative expression feels important in this time for self-regulation.

sunday 12/15 - mercury goes direct, full moon in gemini - in the last moments of mercury retrograde, we have a full moon in a mercury-ruled sign, wild! time to break out the red string on your current life circumstances. ponder everything - what has been frustrating in the past few weeks, what do you want to lean more into, what do you want to cut your losses with, where do you want to go from here? engage some of the classic gemini manifestation techniques. nothing is truly out of your reach! haters simply lack the imagination.

[art-of-manliness]

5 Fast-Food Meals That Are High in Protein and Less Than 600 Calories

If you’re trying to lose weight, one of the challenges you’ll face is what to do about those times when you find yourself at a fast-food restaurant. The offerings at these establishments are typically incredibly high in calories. A Big Mac meal at McDonald’s can set you back 1,300 calories. Damn! If your calorie goal for the day is 2,400 calories, that’s more than half your daily calories in a single meal. The typical advice for people losing weight is to just avoid fast-food restaurants altogether. And with some preparing, thinking ahead, and good decision-making, you can accomplish that most of the time. But not 100% of the time. Sometimes, life throws a wrench in your plans. Maybe you’re on a road trip, and your friends decide to stop at Carl’s Jr. for lunch. Maybe your kid’s soccer team decided to go out to dinner to Chick-fil-A after the game. Maybe you’re just really pressed for time and need to grab something fast at a drive-thru on the way from work to another engagement. What to do? Well, what if I told you you don’t have to choose between convenience and your fitness goals? You can have your fast-food burger and eat it too—all while staying on track with your weight loss. When you want to lose weight, you want to choose foods that are lower in calories and higher in satiating, muscle-building protein. Thankfully, most fast-food restaurants now offer options that meet this criteria. With a bit of creativity, you can easily select meals at pretty much all the major fast-food restaurants that will give you 30+ grams of protein (which is a good minimum goal for a meal) and only clock in at around 600 calories. Below, we provide some suggestions for meals that meet these metrics that you can get at five popular fast-food restaurants. One thing to keep in mind is that while you can reduce the calories in your fast-food orders, it’s hard to reduce the amount of sodium. These are going to be sodium bombs. So they’re not great for everyday dining, but they’ll do in a pinch. Whether you’re looking to shed a few pounds or maintain your hard-earned gains, this guide will show you how to navigate the pitfalls of fast-food menus and stay on track with your goals. General Guidelines to Keep Your Fast-Food Meals Lower in Calories Before we get into specific meals, here are some general guidelines to follow that will allow you to keep your meals lower in calories, regardless of the fast-food establishment you visit: * Food tracking apps like MyFtinessPal are your friends. I use the app all the time when I’m at fast-food restaurants. Quickly look up the calorie and macro count of foods and piece together your meal with that info. * Choose grilled over fried meats. * Choose lean proteins. While you can still enjoy a beef burger, protein sources like turkey or chicken breast generally have fewer calories. * Ask for extra protein. Adding extra protein, like extra meat, can help increase satiety while keeping calories low. * Skip the fries. If you’re looking for a side, get fruit or salad instead. Also, hot take: fries aren’t that good anyway! * Skip the high-fat sauces, dressings, and condiments. Ask for lower-calorie options instead. * Load up on veggies. Satiety is premised in part on volume; calorically dense foods won’t fill you up and will leave you feeling hungry. To increase volume and nutrition, add low-calorie veggies to your meals like extra lettuce, tomatoes, and onions. * Choose water or unsweetened drinks like diet sodas. Finally, don’t be afraid to enjoy yourself with a no-holds-barred high-calorie fast-food meal every now and then. I love getting a double cheeseburger on occasion. You can just adjust your macros and calories accordingly and eat less the rest of the day. Or just chalk it up to an anomalous indulgence, and get back to your diet the next day. You don’t have to eat perfectly 100% of the time to still lose weight and stay healthy. Fast-Food Meals That Are 600 Calories or Less With More than 30 Grams of Protein McDonald’s… http://dlvr.it/TBgWkR

[veritas-rpg]

Inspired by inquiries about the types of characters that we could see thriving at Daehan University, we've compiled a list of character archetypes to spark your creativity. Feel free to choose any of these character templates or use them as inspiration to create your own character. Just make sure to mention your choice in your application form so we can update the list accordingly. That being said, here are some muse ideas that we think can seamlessly fit into the tapestry of Daehan Institute:

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Intellectual : A brilliant intellect, possibly a top student fully devoted to their academic pursuits. They tend to be reserved, not necessarily by choice but due to their lifelong dedication to studies. This reserved nature provides ample room for character growth if you choose to explore their journey of discovering that life holds more than just academia. Moreover, they could seamlessly integrate into the Dead Poets Society, finding kindred spirits who share their passion for knowledge and self-discovery.

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Socialite : Born into opulence and privilege, from the most prosperous of lineages. Personality-wise, they might exude arrogance, boundless ambition, and a relentless competitive spirit. With a family history deeply rooted in Daehan University, the weight of tradition and expectations rests heavily upon their shoulders. However, beneath the facade of upholding tradition lies a compelling twist — the struggle they face in living up to these lofty expectations, gradually succumbing to the immense pressure. This character archetype can effectively introduce and explore the complex web of social and class dynamics within the setting.

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Romantic : A devoted enthusiast of literature and the arts, they possess a profound appreciation and insight into their passion. However, their ardor clashes with their family's expectations. Whether hailing from a privileged background or as a scholarship recipient from more modest means, they face a pivotal choice. Will they pursue their dreams against the wishes of their family, or will familial obligations compel them to set aside their aspirations?

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Skeptic : A defiant character, or maybe someone who prefers the shadows. Whether conspicuous or discreet, they possess a keen perception of the unsettling occurrences within Daehan University. They dare to challenge the institution's long-held traditions, principles, or ethical standards, making them an ideal candidate for the Seekers of the Veil society.

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Haunted : A character marked by a haunting trauma that continues to cast a shadow over their present. Perhaps they endured the loss of a beloved figure under mysterious circumstances, with the added twist that this individual was a fellow student at Daehan. Driven by an unwavering determination to unearth the truth, they embark on a relentless quest to delve deeper into the eerie mysteries lurking within the hallowed halls of Daehan University.

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Guilty : An individual who committed a heinous crime, escaping justice through luck or connections. Now at Daehan University, they relish their second chance, but the past may catch up with them. Ideal for exploring thrilling narratives and the desperate measures they'll take to protect their secrets.

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Fallen Prodigy : Once a child prodigy pushed to the brink by overbearing parents, this muse suffered a burnout during high school, leaving them cynical and deeply insecure. Now at Daehan University, they aim to rekindle their academic passion and find redemption, possibly through one of the secret societies.

𖥔 ݁ ˖ The Medium : Gifted with the ability to sense the supernatural from a young age—or so they believe. This muse has witnessed unexplainable events on campus. Silent and enigmatic, they hold secrets that can uncover the supernatural and occult aspects of the roleplay.

[rheallsim]

Sims Tag Game

Tagged by: No one, but I saw it going around and wanted to fill it out anyway. ;)

What’s your favourite sims death? I think it would have to be Cardiac Explosion. I just find the idea of a sim getting so mad that their heart explodes hilarious, I don't know why! ^^

Alpha CC or Maxis Match? I've always been pretty Maxis Match. If I were to go Alpha I'd have to change *everything* in the game to match otherwise it would bug the crap outtah me, and gosh, that would be WAY too much work. x___x I also just love the cartoony aesthetic a heck of a lot more.

Do you cheat when your sims gain weight? No, not usually. Only if the weight gain/loss was completely unrealistic to what I'd expect because the game's systems don't work the way I'd like. Sometimes I become attached to the idea of a sim being a certain way, but I usually let their natural metabolism win out in the game. I love me some soft, chubby sims! :)

Do you use move objects? Yes!

Favorite mod? Ooof, this is hard… I've become very fond of most of Lumpinou's mods. MissyHissy has a lot of great mods that flesh out the gameplay in a maxis-match way, too! Though I probably get the most use out of Wonderful Whims and Meaningful Stories; the game just doesn't feel right without them!

First expansion/game/stuff pack you got? Gosh, this was so long ago I can barely remember… it was probably Get Together or City Living.

Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing? aLIVE Mode, like "we're going LIVE to Bella Goth in Willow Creek!"

Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made? This is a hard one, because I love them all so much! 🥹 Philomena Velasquez will always hold a special place in my heart as my first Sims 4 legacy founder who was super fun to play (even though I didn't have a simblr blog at the time so none of it is documented anywhere). But I also have a major soft spot for Gabriel McKinley. She has the best resting bitch face. :D

Have you made a simself? Yup, I may be a little too obsessed with them, hahaha

What sim traits do you give yourself? Usually: Geek, unflirty, and either creative/maker. Since we can have more than that now, I might also add dog lover, loyal, and lazy (because it matches my ME/CFS symptoms closest).

Which is your favorite EA hair color? The second brown swatch, the new one with the nice warm highlights. :D Swatch #4. 👍

Favorite EA hair? I love the base game half-tied back tight curly hair, the one that was added in a free patch not too long ago. ^^ (SDX015CoilyTwistback)

Favorite life stage? I have a soft spot for all of them for different reasons, but I do really love it when my sims reach Elderhood and develop wrinkles and grey hair and start to slow down. :) Feels like a reward after a long, hard life! I love giving my elders a few more days using MCCC so they can enjoy being grandparents. ^^

Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay? 99% gameplay! I will occasionally build if the madness strikes me, but I usually rely on builds shared by others here on Tumblr or on the gallery. I'm not very good at designing actual buildings, and I get so caught up in decorating sometimes that it takes HOURS. x___X

Are you a CC creator? I am! I haven't yet broken into anything that requires Blender, but if it's a simple 2D .png texture edit I'm all over it. :D

Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad? Nope! It's just me, which is absolutely fine! I have friends elsewhere. I just really don't get on with Discord, and that seems to be where most simblr folks hang out in groups.

What’s your favorite game? (Sims 1, 2, 3, or 4) I've played all of them, and every time the new game was an improvement on the old, for various reasons. I played SO MUCH of the Sims 2 when I was a kid/in high school, it really stoked the flames of my life-long Sims addiction. While I've gone back and tried to play all the old games again recently, I just couldn't get back into them. The Sims 4 currently has my whole heart. I love the aesthetic, and there's so much content to it now I don't really want for anything that the older games had. (Except perhaps more chaos/whimsy/custom animations for various interactions. :) )

Do you have any sims merch? Other than the video games themselves, nope!

Do you have a YouTube for sims? Nope! Not really a video content person. ^^

How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing? It hasn't, much; though I suppose I keep finding new skin details that I fall in love with and start using on every sim, so you can see different phases that way. I might go a little maxis mix when it comes to some skin details nowadays. ^^;

What’s your Origin ID? Rheall

Who’s your favorite CC creator? Oh gosh, I have so many! For hairs, Okruee, Dogsill, and Simstrouble never let me down. I also love Shysimblr's stuff, SleepingSims, and Simtric's. Saurus' hair is still such an important staple for me, too! For clothes, Joliebean, Trillyke, LadyFu's recolours, Nucrests, Simkoos, Renorasims, Sifix, Jius, Rusty, Serenity, VIIAVI… Max20 has a chokehold on me for BB stuff, as does SIXAMcc, Surely-Sims, awingedllama and Ravasheen. Sorry, I honestly can't pick just one. ;____;

How long have you had a simblr? I started this one in Oct 2020, I think. Wasn't really in the Simblr community at any other time, though I did try to create some CC back in TS2 days on ModTheSims. ^^

How do you edit your pictures? I mostly rely on my Gshade preset to do most of the colour editing/DOF stuff, then I do a teensy bit more in Photoshop and apply TopazClean. I made a post about my current process here. I also have some older examples/downloads here and here. When I first started I did all my editing in Clip Studio Paint; Photoshop isn't a requirement to get nice screenshots. :)

What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far? This is also a hard one! I'm really enjoying all the stuff added with Growing Together. Definitely the best expansion pack in a while. City Living, Seasons, and Cats & Dogs are also fantastic. The game packs that add new occults, Vampires and Werewolves, are also good fun! And as far as added gameplay goes, Strangerville is a really great buy.

What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next? I can't lie, I'm super excited about the idea of a horse-themed pack, but I know it won't be as good as I hope it will be. X) As far as anything else? Hmm… I'd love more career variety in terms of how it interacts with gameplay (fewer boring rabbit hole careers, for example), and more apartment lots. Another city-styled world would be amazing, as well as worlds based on different places around the globe. I love Sulani, Mt. Komorebi, Tartosa, etc., let's get more variety! 💪

Tagging: I tag everyone who stops to smell the flowers. <3

[stelladeosttrpg]

Kobold

(Race description below)

Age Range: (4d20)

Can live up to 80, reach maturity at 15

Height: (140 cm + 2d12)

142-164 cm

Weight: (54 kg + 1d20)

56-76 kg

Names: Kobold names feature frequent hissing and purring sounds. The use of the letters S and X are quite common, especially for the ending of the name. On rare occasions, the letter Z may be used.

Examples: Phylx, Sarias, Verris, Kessis

"Once considered a member of the dragon gene tree, the Kobold are the result of irresponsible breeding by an unknown entity. Some Kobold believe that they were stripped of their dragonic status for their sins, while others wonder if it is a challenge by the gods. Both schools of thinking collectively agreed that to make up for their losses, they needed to get creative. Through centuries of intense study, the Kobold have become some of the brightest mechanical engineers in the world.

To create is to strive. To strive is to create. These feline-esque serpents take great pride in their mechanical works, often forming Lab Bonds with like-minded Kobold and even their Dwarven allies. Lab Bonds act as a miniature company, often crafting specific products. Oft treasured are Lab Bonds that produce firearms and vehicles. To craft a tool that gets adopted as Machinist Standard is considered one of the highest honors bestowed upon a Kobold.

Blunt, and analytical by nature, the Kobold do not sugarcoat their words well. They tend to hold specific interests in their crafts, a specific interest that they have great understanding of. Should a Kobold catch wind of a discussion involving such an interest, they are likely to butt into the conversation, adding their insight to the matter. They are known to dip out of conversation abruptly, however, if it is not stimulating enough."