#crazy to be using those tags again
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crossover of the century being a former rt/ah fan and having gavinās question of a million dollars but you get chased by a snail thatāll kill you if it touches you inspire grian to the point of having a wild card in the new life series literally be the snail that chases you
#wild life spoilers#life series spoilers#wild life#life series#trafficblr#grian#gavin free#rt#achievement hunter#roosterteeth#crazy to be using those tags again#the snail that chases shall live forever!#itās funny that itās such a thing now some people donāt even know the origin#my two worlds colliding fr#mumbo calling it an existential question too was literally just !!!#that was gavin doing a dumb !!!! and look where we are !!!!
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This Art blog reached over a 100 followers! So to celebrate I've decided to gift š something to you!
How :
If you follow me reblog this post with a picture of your Persona or OC attached!
Why and what :
I will then look through the reblogs and choose a handful to draw and post!
[Update: 1st drawing out of 5 now posted!!]
(Reminder that I do NOT accept OC requests in my asks so this is your only chance to have yours drawn!)
Anyways here you guys are:
@autisticgremllin @creativia10 @flickeringillusions853 @beurkivol @lilydragon0
@panchocolinas @daniellemarvel4 @ilov3b00kss0much @lonely-linn @firinniee
@multifandomjumper @cryingwolf-sirius @paperboatprince @wososkkwkwkwksks @hypnotion
@m-cariagga2021 @randomgirl2012 @sr-8eep5 @dcxcv @psychoaddison
@precambrian-sea-pancake @formerlyfandy @please-be-nice-im-sensitive @strongest-angel-in-heaven @ice-magician
@xelphinanyxalis @lunaloveschickennuggets @pixeltehvixen @ghost-171-blah @ody2302
@thatpersonnamesilver @krystalskiez @thewrongwarrior @my-n4m3-15-n080dy @dictatorshipper
@mets023 @reinfei-fandomizer-28 @circus-gone-wrong @cupceekcup
@bladevoyager @charlotte0--0 @cameronroof @nessiet @blekshma
@bennyandj @1000cavalry @fuckingdeadinsidetm @owleweowl @n1cky5
@epic-fan1 @notschoolaccount @coldilikeit @warmilikeit @sinnedmorrow
@fairyflows @acespecasf @godofchaos13 @thatonekid @j-acky
@p3achii-was-h3r3 @pan999flo @honeycasette @artxstic-scr1bbles @chichilllive
@a-smol-lychee123 @primojelly @browhyihatethis @featherwaits @ihavehomework2dobutimhereinstead
@moni48isa @angrynerdalpaca @gayvoidobject @xenomorphicidiot @runic-dreamer
@ryomaandgundhamkin @xobs25 @hug3geek @kazurie @scratchthat-jaguar
@severnighttragedy @wikithewikipedia @vinniechaosss @theoneandonlypatches @grenue
@cartoon15 @deathly777 @ravis3050 @librarifan @knight-elm
@wafflefrieseater @bananarama12 @thelara13 @lulus-epic-version @estrogenprincess
@demonixoverlord @shommon @beeisnotdead @I-ybee @arian-cant-finish-art
@emmanuellygatinha @peppermintsaysrandomthings @a-z-4-m-i @itslesbiantime1 @eclecticobservationarbiter
If I got anyone wrong then pssshh no I didn't
#Some might not find that number that impressive but It hasn't even been 3 weeks since i started āNyssa's Atelierā so it's crazy to me!#Got me sitting here like šļøššļø#Anyways love you all ššš#nyssa#Tagging the things that brought us together#digital fanart#epic fanart#epic the musical fanart#fanart#Really hope ppl see this post in spite of my terrible tagging#oc request#art gift#follower gift#Reblog this!#With one OC attached!#I'm never tagging that many people again š i had to individually type all those names my brain feels like mush now#Special shout out to everyone with actual words in their usernames i love you you've made this easier
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You should post your thoughts on JaāMarr and Kyle!! Iām so interested in their dynamic if that makes sense š
lmao anon i love you thank you because i was literally just typing a post up by itself. but now i get the benefit of looking like i'm not the ONLY person to care about this. (there's at least two of us!!)
ok so! too much rambling about things that i could no way actually know anything about irl BUTĀ
kyle and jaāmarr being together in paris is VERY interesting to me. their whole relationship is really because like. okay. i have joked that kyle and jaāmarr are there to pick out joeās wardrobe for next year together lmao but like!!! the clothes saga is SUCH a thing with jaāmarr. the man has a Complex about joe and fashion and his part in it. we know this. i hardly need to go over the clothes saga with yāall again. but i will because itās fun for me. jaāmarr claims in GQ that he buys clothes for joe all the time and drops them off at 'the houseā for him. which is insane enough if thatās true. then a few days after that article drops (and also joeās appendix explodes) he says nah never mind i was lying! (ākindaā). and thatās insane too. but whatever, we let it go, thereās football to play. then that offseason tee decides to cause some chaos i guess and confirms that actually jaāmarr HAS bought joe clothes āmultiple timesā so thatās. something!!! (along with TB in that one pivot podcast with all three of them teasing jaāmarr about it!!) and then SOMEHOW none of this gets brought up again until a few months ago when jaāmarr is just like āyeah actually iāve been buying him clothes since last yearā which is still a year later than he first said he bought him clothes š¤
ALL OF WHICH TO SAY that jaāmarr is fucking weird about this. he may or may not buy joe clothes (iām still leaning yes on this), and he may or may not want people to know about it. i think he realizes just how intimate of a thing that is, to repeatedly buy someone you care about clothes that you think he would like, that youād like to see him in. and i think if we go back to my Vision of insecure at times jaāmarr, itās one way to explain his back and forth on this.
but then!! insert kyle, who i believe only became joeās stylist within the last year. before that i donāt think joe ever really had anyone Official to help him out with specific outfits/styles/branding etc (iām sure the joe girlies will correct me if i'm wrong on this). and now i can only imagine that jaāmarr might be feeling a littleā¦possessive of joe here (what else is new lol āthatās my qb not their qbā type shit). like if we believe heās been buying him clothes since at least 2021, thatās likeā¦thatās jaāmarrās Thing at this point?? even if it only started happening in 2023, thatās still a long time of "oh hey i saw this and thought of you and will you wear it and when you wear it will i feel a little thrill knowing that you took my advice knowing that you value my opinion knowing that the clothes touching your skin are only doing so because i bought them for you in the first place etc etc." and now hereās joe paying someone else to do it?? and who the fuck is kyle why him why does HE get to do it he didnāt even win a national championship with him in college???? (jaāmarr obviously would be more rational than that. of course joe should pay someone to help him out with style as he does events and builds his brand more. but as a fellow Emotional Person myself, the rational response is never the first or strongest one.)Ā
so like! thereās that. that alone could make jaāmarr not inclined to LOVE Kyle, ya know? and then if we want to get really Deep and dive into internalized homophobia of Male Athlete Culture. of my version (MY VERSION JUST MY VERSION THIS IS NOT ME SAYING ANYTHING IRL ABOUT HIM) of jaāmarr and how he might cope with feelings and attractions that do not neatly fall in line with what is Expected of him and Has Been Expected of him since he was a kid. like fuck. do we remember how his dad said jaāmarr used to like to read with his cousins (who were girls) but then his male friends came around and made fun of him for it, so he stopped reading altogether as a child?? thinking about that still makes my heart hurt! aughhh Gender!! and then even a few weeks ago on stream when jaāmarr accidentally said that kyrie was sexy and IMMEDIATELY the chat and his friends jumped on him for it!! like yeah it was all lighthearted and all that but he got all embarrassed and even fucking apologized??? just the immediate policing of language/behavior followed by the immediate apology and moving on to no longer watching kyrie clips lol. crazy!!! Male Athlete Culture is SUCH a trip!!Ā
and kyle is gay! very much out and proud and not hiding or ashamed of any of it (fucking good for him tbh. i know heās not Loved in this fandom but like that does genuinely take guts to be yourself like that in a culture like this. and make a career out of it! and he seems to be thriving!) and i just have to wonder like, how many queer people jaāmarr really knows well?? the nfl has their corporate pride month bullshit where they celebrate the like 1 out gay assisant coach? 1 out gay FORMER player? if there are more queer people in the nfl, they are not very public about it. so again, how much daily interaction does a typical football player like jaāmarr get with queer people?? i do imagine all the connections that are growing with the fashion world help of course! like kyle! who itās clear heās at least friendly with, if not the best of friends. and so like, i wonder about how that could stir complicated emotions in jaāmarr if we go with my (AGAIN JUST MINE IāM NOT ACTUALLY SAYING ANYTHING IRL) version of him as a guy who has Feelings about male teammates sometimes and struggles with Dealing With That.Ā
and throw in the fact that jaāmarr primarily knows him as this guy whoās always hanging around joe lol. taking over his role as joeās personal stylist?? being free and open and ALLOWED to be attracted to all these guys, to joe himself!! (and if he thinks too hard about that he REALLY gets in his feelings). and itās not jealousy really because he knows how important he himself is in joeās life. kyleās not replacing their history, heās certainly not replacing his value to joe on the field, their close friendship, etc. but! he occupies a space in joeās life that jaāmarr canāt touch. he can publicly and proudly buy joe clothes. something that jaāmarr WANTS but keeps shying away from. he can feel any feelings and any attraction he happens to have, heās not hiding any part of who he is. if he thinks joeās hot, if he thinks joe looks particularly attractive in an outfit he chose for him, he can! he will! he does! and i think that that just HAS to drive jaāmarr a little fucking crazy.
so yeah. he likes the guy. theyāre friendly. heāll do a goofy lil dance when prompted by him for social media. but itās Complicated. itās Very Complicated. (to me.)Ā
#once again obligatory 'you are following a crazy person' warning#also lmao i am aware that kyle has a tumblr but i blocked it on the day we all found out about that#so he shouldn't be able to see any of this thank god#but just in case i'm not using any Full Names in the tags and if you rb i'd ask that you don't either#but i will tag it as#joe'marr#since it is kind of that. adjacently. and now i can find it again if i need to for whatever reason lol#ANYWAY though. yeah. shit's wild.#i dunno i kind of had been thinking about all this already#and then when kyle grabbed his shoulder ja'marr turned and obliged with a lil dance#but there was no Warmth like there usually is in those eyes lmao#(which could easily be explained by he was bored/distracted/etc. but. instead i did all this. so!)#hope y'all enjoy if you get through all that. i didn't know i had /quite/ that many feelings about it actually lol
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LAST MINUTE CYL Sharena propaganda, that... ended up being too last minute. Whoops! Well. I'm happy to have them, for any occasion. šš
This is a redraw of one of my fave anniversary arts! The 4th anniversary one! With some slight changes, and focused on Sharena and Alfonse, themselves (I did debate drawing my Summoner in the corner, like in that artwork, but.... no..... I just..... need to focus on Them....)
That said, I have a few other doodles too!
Oooughhfjhhhhghhhhhhhgghhhfff........, the. š„ŗš„ŗš„ŗš„ŗš„ŗ Yeagh š
I also wanted to include the 4th anniversary art for comparison! Under a cut! But also chances are you can just. Go to my blog and See It LMFAOO š§
It maybe would have been nice to include the cute background too........ but you can't make me. NUMBER #1 HATER OF BACKGROUNDS š«š«š«š¤š¤š¤š¤š¤š„š„š„š„š„š„š„
#fire emblem#feh#moe is notoriously normal about it.#i'm like. mildly bothered that the head doesn't connect to anything in the moe doodles but.#it got too busy w the hood? that i was planning on adding? but then i just. didn't LMFAOO#the focus is the askr siblings.#also it's dark out again and i don't wanna wait til tomorrow. so. explodes š„š„š„š„š„š„š„š„š„š„š„š„#ALSO. the way that this is like. an expanded redraw. w extra doodles. makes me think of like#those kinda stupid 'we used ai to Finish this piece š²š¤Æ' like. first of all. lmfao. second of all#bitch. get yourself someone dedicated enough and they will do it themselves by their own hand.#out of love. and autism. love and autism. as god intended.#it's me. i'm him. the guy doing it himself.#regardless! i'm really happy w how it came out!!!!#ALSO the capes kinda blending together IS INTENTIONAL. GOES CRAZY. TO ME.#like what if we were so important to each other so intertwined w one another that we might as well be each other's limbs. ect#they're soooooooooo. i have a lot of feelings about them .#and so does moe.#sharena#fe alfonse#moe tag#summoner oc#my art
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Every day I get closer to making an unhinged behemoth of a post listing all of the things about Kaeya and his possible connections to mythology & stuff that I notice but NOBODY ELSE SEEMS TO BRING UP IN THEIR THEORIES
(edit: OMG I reached the tag limit I'm so sorry)
#genshin impact#kaeya alberich#the unhinged behemoth of a post would also include all the reasons I DON'T think Kaeya is up to anything nefarious#if I see 1 more ākaeya will betray usā or ākaeya is allied with the abyssā theory ISTG I'm gonna break something#also WHY. WHY IS NOBODY AND I MEAN NOBODY MENTIONING THE POSSIBILITY THAT#EVEN IF KAEYA IS WORKING āWITHā THE ABYSS ORDER#IT'S AS A DOUBLE AGENT?!?!!?#LIKE HE'S GETTING INTEL FROM THEM FOR THE PURPOSE OF FEEDING IT TO THE KNIGHTS OR TO DILUC OR SOMETHING#AND HE'S ALSO STABBING THE ABYSS ORDER IN THE BACK#IT'S A SNEAKY TACTIC THAT'S NOT EXACTLY HONOURABLE AND PUTS HIM VERY MUCH IN HARM'S WAY BUT IT'S FOR THE SAKE OF KEEPING PEOPLE SAFE#HOW IS THAT NOT THE MOST KAEYA THING EVER?!?!?#WHY AM I SEEMINGLY THE ONLY ONE THINKING ABOUT THIS?!?!?!#I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS#also why is no one bringing up Kaeya's possible connections to king Arthur???#I mean HELLO?! secret possible royal lineage raised as a ward/foster child/adopted child of a noble family alongside an older brother?!!#and why aren't more people talking about Kaeya's connections to Lord Krishna???#again spirited away from his actual family to be raised in another family alongside an older brother figure who has less chill than him???#not to mention peacock feather imagery and being pitted against an evil uncle#if you believe that Clothar is Kaeya's uncle rather than a direct ancestor#there is so much more I could bring up and I'm not even an expert in any of this nor am I the best at research#but I should probably save those for an actual post#plus I don't want to flood these tags more than I have#I have so so so many things to say about Kaeya#he lives in my heart rent free he makes me feel and think so much he is truly the most beloved of all my beloveds#truly the blorbo of all time for me#if even 1 person expresses interest in all my theory-esque thoughts on Kaeya I will have won at life#this is an invitation guys please ask me to talk more about kaeya
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I have a gift for y'all today !!! š Ever wanted to find a line in Re:Kinder in a single place for the sake of reference?? How about multiple chunks of lines. how about all the little variations that arise in the text with it's many endings, item descriptions, text that comes from interacting with the enviroment, and character info from the menu without having to boot up the game and go through it at long minutes!!???
well i sure didš Since I do a lot of fanart and think up my own silly theories and thoughts that need me to reference the game lines a lot, i have made a transcript for it for convenience's sake. A weirdly thorough transcript handwritten and proofread by me including all character lines available in-game. And I'm sharing it with you all today for anyone that wants it !!! :3 To use as a reference for creative fanworks or a quick search for a line in-game, whatever you wish to use it for!!
It uses the english translation of the game by vgperson. So naturally all credit for the game lines available in here is to her and Parun who made the game.
I did my best to organize it in a way easy to digest. Do note that I'm still human, and there's still the chance for mistake in it no matter how much I've proofread it, since I'm not even an english native speaker ^^. But I hope it serves you well nonetheless if you wish to use it.
That's my gift for today!!! Not the usual art, but still a project I'm proud of. Enjoy!!! š
#re:kinder#rekinder#not art#now goofy commentary for those who read my tags#i may have spent at the very minimum around 35 hours on it š because thats what my pomodoro timer got to count in sum#but then again i spent more time without timing it as well so. we'll never know how many hours in total I've put into this#no regrets it was fun because shocking fact of all i enjoy this gameš«£ (/s)#you could say but michael there are long playthroughs available on YouTube#couldnt you reference that instead of making a transcript#to that i say... they don't play the game like i do im picky as hell they dont show me every nook and cranny possible#and also i dont like scrubbing through those i thought just pressing ctrlF on a script would be easier. AND IT IS JAJSJSJSJSJS#but thats personal preference all in all#and im used to using transcripts for fanworks coming from earthbound. like there's one for the main game dialogue online and i love it a lot#for this game to not have any felt like some sort of crime considering how cool the story and the lines it has are#its also plenty useful for a game you're writing the spanish wiki for#yes i am doing that apparently my hobby became community work since i got into this game#gotta put that free time before turning 18 and getting a job onto something why not make resources just because i can#anyway fun fact while proofreading i noticed that everytime yuuichi was on scene there was a typo because i got too excited or emotional#either i was laughing because of how evil he is or i was getting unreasonably angry at the treatment he recieved in the past#in section 9 which is true end confrontation i was doing mistakes left and right until the fabled princess line scene#there i was bawling like a baby but THE ERRORS STOPPED ABRUPTLY LIKE I WAS FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE ALL UNTIL THE SCENE ENDED#THEN THERE WERE A BUTLOAD OF MISTAKES ITS INCREDIBLY FUNNYš i was fighting for my life holding in all those typos because i couldnt see#so this transcript was made with a lot of emotion laugh and tears and now you know#now i can get bagk to drawing this is the thing i mentioned i was doing fot a while#content feeding schedule crazy rn
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tiktokers be like āI am going to create the most beautiful, relaxing, aesthetically pleasing video ever, with gorgeous lighting, and deeply satisfying contentā. ā¦ā¦.. āand then Iām going to cut the video fifty thousand times in thirty seconds-ā
#chatting tag#WHY. WHY. PLEASE.#I swear like every gifset I ever see that comes from tiktok is like the most gorgeous shit Iāve ever seen in my life#(specifically those videos of food that have really sunny lighting. OUGH thatās my SHIT)#but then EVERY TIME thereās like 5 cuts in every single individual gif. and it drives me crazy#donāt get me wrong they are good gifsets and it is not the gif makers fault. and obviously I know why the tiktok makers do that#bc thereās such a short time limit on the videos and they want to keep their attention and what not#but I swear to god they will make cuts that are SO FUCKING UNNECESSARY like just cutting literal milliseconds out of a satisfying shot.#which makes it no longer as satisfying. why. why do you do this to me.#listen I just have this secret rule that I never use gifs that have any cuts in them at all in my boards#unless theyāre like really really nice. but even then like only two cuts max or I go crazy. I donāt like how weird and choppy it looks!!!!#so then like all of the prettiest gifs ever. I canāt use. BC THERES SO MANY GIDDAMN CUTS#like thereās so many videos Iād want to make gifs of but you canāt even get like a millisecond long gif out of it without including cuts šš#ugh. anyways. that was my unnecessarily petty and extensive rant that Iāve just been holding in for a while. sorry.#also sorry but the other thing that bothers me is that stupid logo taking up half the gif.#one of my othe hyper specific secret rules is that I cannot use any gif that has a visible logo or watermark on it bc it drives me nuts#and like. not to rag on gif makers. bc gif makers are the most wondrous thing in the entire world and everything they do is great.#but I DO know a REALLLYYY easy way to download TikTokās without the watermark itās so simple it would take like two seconds. please. for me#just look up tiktok video downloader thereās like four good functional websites immediately. itās so easy#letās all start doing this pls we could make the most perfect gifsets ever without that ugly ass logo#(again not mad at gifmakers. I love u gifmakers. muah.)
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freminet. u agree.
istg genshin has me in a chokehold and im here for it. got him recently for the event and now i luv him very much
#still havent done furina's archon quest so i dunno much abt him and his siblings#yet#i will get there eventually#i was gonna color the other ones but its getting late and unfortunately 3 hrs of sleep is not enough to sustain me#but idk i've chaged styles (yet again ik crazy) and now coloring is rlly fun for me :D#anyways freminet my lil precious baby#genshin impact#genshin fanart#freminet#genshin freminet#freminet genshin#are those the tags?#idk what tags the genshin fandom uses but i suppose these will do#night does art
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someone put me out of my misery it's only 10 am
#so guess who finished banana fish recently!#(shoot me)#bro i thought everyone was exaggerating#they in fact were NOT.#aslan jade callenreese and eiji okumura i will forever honor the memory of you both#do i add tags so banana fish fans find this? idk!!!!#anyway isn't it crazy that banana fish abbreviated is bf which is also used as boyfriend!!! shows how gay those two are!!!!#though the show was a lot more subtle about it than people said fr#sigh i guess i'll add those tags whatever#banana fish#ash lynx#eiji okumura#aslan jade callenreese#tldr; tragic male friendship with homosexual undertones has ruined the youth once again (i am the youth)
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How are we doing folks this fine Wednesday
#random af post but i feel ive been very absent lately#having a job is crazy like i gotta go to work tomorrow ā¼ļø#i have been good though job is fine all things considered#already spent money on stuff i absolutely do not need. September 1st please come soon#and also 21st of June. i am so so so excited#cant wait to get my ass beat by mesmer and whatever wild bosses fromsoft have decided to throw at us!!!#i need to get ready for the dlc i think i only have like. one character ready#problem is ive started playing through multiple zlda games again š tp alttp mc la....#<- those are acronyms for zlda games i dont want to bother the tags with this stuff and also too lazy to type em out fully LMAO#but yeah hope y'all are having a lovely evening!
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6 years of creating <3 happy birthday BB and Rasp!!
#it feels really fitting that 404 ended on the same week of their birthday#i wouldn't been writing mul71v3r53 at all if i hadn't made them all those years ago#it's crazy that just wanting to make a couple of cherryberry shipkids when i was almost 15 has taken me so far#i know a lot of people following me on here weren't around for me initial attempt at writing the story#so a lot of you likely don't even know who they are yet - which is entirely my own fault for not talking about them more ^^;#anyway. i can't wait for a whole new year of creating! hopefully this one will feature more of the girls#sketch's birthday is exactly one week away now too so keep an eye out for that!#mul71v3r53#blackberry/bb oc#raspberry/rasp oc#(<- woaw check out those old tags. i Will be using them again)
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Some concept doodles for my extremely self indulgent isat au Iāve been obsessed with lately
#keese draws#isat#isat siffrin#isat odile#eternal gales#for context on the glasses! staliens have naturally very poor eyesight so I imagine that glasses are extreme common on the island in this au#odile also has glasses but those are just for reading since reading can be a bitch otherwise#my biggest struggle rn is translating everyoneās heights since Iām used to working with teenage staliens mostly#like I want to make siffrin shorter but I rly donāt know if I can get away with it without actively changing their backstory#theyād need to have been starving for a Long time for me to justify making them any shorter#but yeah mirabelle would probably be like 6ā2 or smth which is like still super short for an adult stalien but not as crazy short as sif#well for her societies standard anyways since she was born during the hot dry season so sheās just naturally on the smaller end#isabeau on the other hand was born during the cold dry season and would probably be like 9ā10 or smth?#which is again pretty damn tall but not actually that crazy by his societies standards#and bonnie would probably be like 5ā5 or smth like that#on and euphrasie is like 12ā11 because sheās silly like that#ok Im making an au tag for my sake fuck it#if nothing else itll be good for me to archive times Ive talked abt stalien worldbuilding#eternal stars au
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Little bit of my rough WIP of suffering
I promise it won't be this ugly when it's done lol trust the process guys, trust the process š
#I have some real life responsibilities rn but I promise I'll get back to working on it soon. Still doing asks though so keep sending those!#I respect evry single animator in this fandom to the moon and back you guys are insane animating entire sagas out there!!! Crazy!!!#So i just found out what keyframes in editing are so I'm hoping I'll be able to figure out how to use them to make things move smoother#Anyways just wanted to again say that this is a really rough wip i havent actually drawn anything yet so please dont judge it too harshly š
#actual tags now#epic animation#epic fanart#epic the musical#epic the musical fanart#fan animatic#Epic fan animatic#epic animatic#suffering epic the musical#epic suffering#Epic suffering animatic#Suffering animatic#animatic wip#Suffering wip#Epic wip#odysseus epic#penelope epic the musical#epic penelope#nyssa#epic#epic musical#epic sirens#sirenelope#Fem Telemachus too I guess haha
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I'm starting to collect the Frieren manga bc I miss the funny elf show
#volume 1 is otw now uwu#i also have bocchi the rock and a few yuri manga otw#been a while since I read physical books but collecting Dungeon Meshi physically reminded me how much I love it#especially the new book smell#crazy how starting hrt has allowed me to allocate all the energy I was using to be sad about not being on hrt#to doing things I used to love again#mainly reading watching shows and playing games again#oh damn is this one of those posts where the real post is in the tags. it is isn't it#oh well real ones will know
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Okay but I need to be someone's beloved wifepet and belong to them completely and be able to pour my whole energy into just loving them. When will it be my turn!
#it won't be honestly#I do not think I will ever actually get to have that#I'm not pretty and I'm disabled in ways that both physically and mentally make me unappealing#so no one really wants anything real with me#especially JUST with me#and I'm *scared* of hurting someone with my craziness tbh#and I only trust like. 3 people at all rn and for various reasons none of those people and I are going to date#and in most of those cases I'm very relieved and in the other there's mixed feelings but mostly positive bc again. i don't want to hurt any1#but i still yearn for it#it's still an emotional need#and I hate that it just isn't ever going to be met#it actually hurts so so badly knowing it won't be met#but i also understand that some people just dont get that kind of happiness#some of us just don't get to be loved#some of us are too ugly and crippled and insane for people to *want* us#i just don't really... want to keep going knowing thay#I'll post it here in the tags bc no one i know reads this blog#(a few know about it but it's not like anyone ever checks it)#but I'm definitely ideating and at risk rn#and i feel pathetic that this is what's doing it#but im an emotionally gooey person and a physical touch person and I'd already been thinking relationships probably werent something i can#like. even do#but then there was a blowup with my ex and like. it was made clear that i can not safely engage with anyone#like emotionally or romantically or sexually#because I'll just hurt them.#like there are parts of me i would like to change but are such a core part of me that they will never change#and they will always hurt someone if we're together ling enough#so im just going to idk.#isolate now tbh#im just gonna cry so much and know i will NEVER have what i emotionally need out of life
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Literally having a moment of drawing my old ass among us ocs (and then made a new one that's not based off a outfit I used to main lmaoo)
#possum's art#possum's ocs#among us#among us oc#CRAZY USIN THOSE TAGS AGAIN#putting em into artfight too loll#šeggosš#āļøtelephoneāļø#šwraithš#might think of a better design for the green dude lol
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