#crab!namjoon

[honey-bunches1345]

Omg.

Yes yes yes

AHHHH ITS SO CUTE

Thank you In The Seom ����😭😭

[rebelangelsims]

Thank you 😊 whoever sent this

[whyse7vn]

BOYFRIEND -

[ot7 x reader]

GOLDEN

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

jimin: do you think i can give yeontan body dysmorphia if i show him pictures of those racer dogs??

cuz their like tall and skinny

and he’s like short and round

y/n: this one sided beef is insane

hobi: jimin wtf is wrong with you

tae: LEAVE MY DOG ALONe

he literally bit you once and all you fucking do is talk shit about him

jimin: fucking ugly nepo baby

ur lucky i don’t cook him and feed him to crabs

yoongi: get a grip

jk: guys how does birth control control birth

tae: it kills growing babies in the womb with lazers i think

hobi: what

jk: ok that makes sense

hobi: ?? no it doesn’t

jk: i wish i could control birth

jimin: abortion

yoongi: jungkook should of been

y/n: YOONGI

yoongi: sorry :3

jk: you think i could perform a abortion

jin: preform a shower

jimin: perform a diet

jin: perform a love life

jimin: perform youth

jin: perform a family that actually loves you

tae: woah

namjoon: ok

calculated all our living expenses and we need to cut down a lot

like we spend so much every month it’s not funny

what can we live without?

yoongi: jungkook probably

jin: OUR living expenses?

we do not live together!!!

tae: tf is a living expense?

y/n: is that from our silly little shared black card?

tae: WE HAVE A SHARED BLACK CARD??/!/!

yoongi: you guys still use that??

jk: i use it to rent fish

hobi: you can rent fish?

jk: yeah

i like to set them free

jimin: that feels illegal

jk: i ate one once tho

it was really sad :/

but i was really hungry

hobi: wtf

jimin: i only use that card for netflix and alcohol btw!!!!!

can’t have my accountant thinking i’m an alcoholic

namjoon: whose been using the card to pay for flights?

hybe pays for all our flights i don’t see why we’ve spent over 4 billion won on flights in the last two months when we’ve all been in korea

tae: HYBE PAYS FOR OUR FLIGHTS????

y/n: yeah are you stupid?

tae: SO WHY HAVE I BEEN GIVING JK MONEY EVERY TIME WE FLY?!

jk: is that money not for our lion we sponsored in africa?

tae: our what?

jk: lion

tae: what

jk: roar meow

🦁

that thing

jin: ofc you sponsored a lion in africa

yoongi: meow

y/n: HOLD ON 4 BILLION WON ON FLIGHTS IN 2 MONTHS???????

THATS INSANE??2£:&;&;&(

jk: we did ^_^!!!

our lion is called reggie and i get sent photos of him sometimes

i love him

jimin: i’ll shoot him

jk: TAKE THAT BACK NOW

jimin: i won’t

jk: NAMJOON TELL HIM TO TAKE IT BACK RN

namjoon: jimin take that back rn

jimin: no

namjoon: i tried!

jk: FUCK YOU

tae: you’ve been using my flight money for a lion??????????

jk: yeah!

didn’t know it was flight money tho

thought it was lion money lol

you know hybe pays for our flights right??

tae: stop speaking to me rn

jk: did i say something wrong????

namjoon: anyways

jungkook you need to stop buying fish

jk: who will set them free if i don’t 😰

hobi: SET ME FREEEEEE

namjoon: jimin chill out on the alcohol

jimin: you only live once namjoon

namjoon: it’s actually concerning how much you’ve bought THIS week

it’s for your own good

jimin: sighs

namjoon: and who tf is taking ubers everywhere we do have drivers yk??

not to mention that’s really fucking dangerous

yoongi: lmao what an idiot

y/n: lol 😅😅😅

yoongi: ????are you silly do you know how dangerous that is

ESPECIALLY for you

y/n: but they are so convenient!!!

and our drivers take soooooooo long

think about it if i didn’t take a uber yesterday i would of been late for our thing yesterday

that’s not cool is it???

yoongi: idc

i would rather you be late than dead in a ditch cuz ur uber driver was a deranged fan

y/n: booo

yoongi: next time you call one of our drivers or i’ll come and get you

ok?

y/n: ok

tae: i could come a get you lol

jk: ME TOO

I CAN

I WILL

ILL GET YOU RN

hobi: are you not in the same house?

tae: btw namjoon can’t get you lol

cuz yk he can’t drive

so he couldn’t come and get you

i’m just saying

i’m just putting it out there

someone you fuck doesn’t know how to drive

you should drop him

cuz what if you was dying and needed him asap no newjeans

he couldn’t come

cuz he can’t drive

just saying btw

namjoon: i think she gets it

shut the fuck up

jimin: LMAOOOO

namjoon: moving on whoever ordered a box of steak for 10k needs to give me the fucking card back

hobi: ok wtf

i needed that steak

jimin: who tf orders meat

y/n: that sounds gross as hell i hope it was same day delivery

hobi: i’m a chef in the making

namjoon: ur wasting money on stupid shit

hobi: ur just mad you don’t have a 10k golden stake like..

jin: namjoon ur being stingy ass hell

money is money

and we have a lot of it???

who cares what we spend it on?

jk: all unsponsored lions in africa

they care

namjoon: could you guys just be a little more responsible with our money please

just with this card at least

idc what you buy with ur own money but please for the love of god at least give me false hope in believing you are all responsible adults that can make sensible financial decisions

yoongi: thought he was an atheist

jin: that’s what im saying “for the love of god” do u even know him 😭

hobi: does he even want ur love namjoon?

jk: u wrote a lot of words there joon so i’m not gonna read it

but i hope i can still buy my fish

i’ll even get small ones if that makes you happy

y/n: would getting tae a bbl be a responsible financial decision?

tae: can i actually get the card pls

wait what????????????

y/n: or jimin do you want the bbl

jimin: I DO NOT NEED A BBL WHAT THE FUCK??

namjoon: ….

you guys are really fucking annoying yk that?

jimin: DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE JUST SAID

SHE BASICALLY CALLED ME FLAT!!!!

jk: at least it wasn’t fat!

jin: should of been 😒

jimin: OHMYGOD AM I FLAT??

DO I NEED A BBL GUYS OMGS

pls BE HONEST OMG DO I NEED A FUCKING BBL ?

tae: send pics so i can tell you

jimin: SHUT THE FUCK UP

tae: ok wtf i was only trying to help you :/

namjoon can i have the card pls pls pls pls

namjoon: no

y/n: hey ur not flat!!!!!

jimin: SO WHY WOULD YOU SAY I NEED A BBL????

y/n: i asked if you wanted one

i didn’t say that you needed one

jimin: do you think i’m flat

y/n: no!!!!!

jimin: ohmygod i’m gonna kms she thinks i’m flat

yoongi: can you read

jk: y/n can you come home i’m really sad namjoon just cancelled my fish rental for next tuesday

y/n: namjoon give him back his fish rental

namjoon: no

jk: y/n come HOME

y/n: can’t!

jaehyun says hi btw

jk: TELL HIM TO KILLHIMSELF /£:£;7:7,

hobi: so this relationship is for real???

namjoon: can we not

jimin: look at him getting defensive 💀

namjoon: how was that defensive??

i just don’t want us to all argue again

jimin: you can just say ur jealous joon

namjoon: shut up

tae: i’m jealous

hobi: we don’t care

jin: so like can jaehyun drive?

y/n: he can do a lot of things >\\\<

yoongi: don’t care

jimin: LMAOOOOO

wow this is really the best thing to happen to us

y/n: us???

he’s MY boyfriend

tae: my chest just caved in

jimin: sorry yeah he’s your BOYFRIEND

yoongi: we fucking get it omg

moving on

hobi: HEHEHEHEHEHEHE

yoongi: tf you giggling for

jk: HEY UR NOT ALLOWED TO GIGGLE

UR RULES HOBI 😡

hobi: today is cheat day

i have to giggle

jk: can i giggle?

hobi: y/n has a boyfriend

jk: SHUT UPSSIJ SHUTUOPSOOOO SDKKDDJDJDJDJDMMEJDJDJEJDJJSJEIDJDJSJDJDJDJDJDJDJDJJDDJJCKXJDJKDKX

namjoon: ok can we solve this card issue

tae: can i have the card pls i need to buy something to stop my heartbeat for a while

namjoon: shut up

hobi: y/n does this mean ur friends with nct now

can i like join them??

pls ask

y/n: ok

jin: omg should we have have a party??

nct x bts

yoongi: no

y/n: can you guys stop trying to cause arguments rn

jin: idk what she’s taking about

hobi: right like??

jimin: think it has something to do with her BOYFRIEND but idk

y/n: …..

jin: so what are you and your BOYFRIEND doing today???

y/n: STOP LAMSOSO

yoongi: so it’s funny now?

y/n: are you fr?

yoongi: i’m just saying lmao

namjoon: ok lets not do this again guys!!

jk: i wish i could do life again

namjoon: ok!

so whose been paying for these flights?

hobi: could be y/n and her BOYFRIEND

y/n: hoseok

hobi: ok sorry last one i’m sorry i’m sorry

jk: do you think reggie has had to deal with heart break like this???

jimin: here he goes 🙄

hobi: bet you all my money he will be drunk in the next hour

jin: hour???

i say the next 5 minutes

namjoon: guys the card??

jimin: namjoon we don’t care??

namjoon: i will punch you in the fucking face

jimin: WOAH??????????

y/n: joon omg

hobi: LMAOSODODJFJ

yoongi: real

jin: i’ll record !!!

tae: my gf said that to me once…

hobi: ??

tae: SIGHS

y/n: i’ll record?

tae: no wtf

the punch you in the face part

y/n: hey i said that

tae: yeah 😞…. yeah you did 😞

jimin: GUYS THERE IS A FUCKING FROG IN MY REFRIGERATOR

IM NOT JOKING

WHY IS THERE A FROG IN THERE

OHMUGOF

GUYS HELP ME

OSHDJCKDJCJD

PLS OHMUGSICODODKF

HELDPDOFKDKFN

JSNDNDND

7:& nfkcjemc

PLS

WHSUSHD WHAT THE FUCKCCKDN

ITS JUMPING IN MY FUCKINH FRIFGE EW EWEW GUYS WHAT THE HELL

jin: always knew he was dirty

hobi: free frog legs

y/n: don’t die

tae: namjoon can i have the black card

yoongi: give up

jimin: THERE IS TWO OF THEM

TWO FUCKMG FROGS HELSODKNDNDNC

HSNDELP HELP

PLS OM BEGHINF

HELP ME

NAMJOON

NAMJOON

NAMJOON

NAMJOON

NmJSODKFNDNCJDJDJJCKC

EW

HELP ME

namjoon: help urself

jk: aw man :/

i feel so sorry for them

birth control ❤️

namjoon: what are you talking about

jk: namjoon i booked a fight to belgium

namjoon: im sorry?

jk: i forgive you

don’t be sorry

chin up king

hobi: tf he yapping about

jk: my fish are going to belgium

yoongi: what

jin: the rented ones?

tae: let’s kill jaehyun

y/n: the 4 billion in 2 months was jungkook?

jk: my fish are ₩20,000 per bucket

not 4 billion the heck

yoongi: wow i’m losing my mind being in this gc

hobi: we can replace you with woozi lol

yoongi: say something like that again and i will break ur neck

hobi: ok WOAH

guys do you see how aggressive he is like???

that’s not right at all

jimin: THE FROGSGUYS OLS OHMUGSICODKDKNDDNDNDN

HELDPDOFKDKDND ENDNCNFMNCNXJDNC

namjoon: jungkook have you been using the card to pay for flights

jk: hybe pays for our fights

namjoon: ok but why did you say you booked a flight to Belgium then???

hobi: its like talking to a 7yr old

jk: no

namjoon: no?

jin: wow he’s making me want to kms

hobi: the soju has taken over!

jk: birth control!

yoongi: shut the fuck up

jk: aw man

who wants fish????

yoongi left “GOLDEN”

namjoon left “GOLDEN”

jin left “GOLDEN”

tae: i’m sorry man

send me those card details later tho!

tae left “GOLDEN”

jimin: WHERE ARE YOU FUCKINGGOFING MY FUCKING FRIDGE HAS FOGS IN IT COME BACK NOW

hobi left “GOLDEN”

y/n left “GOLDEN”

jk: good talk team

--

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @indigobsessed @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @yojaschill @k4ngelz @jmnscutie

[nymph-yoongi]

affection w/namjoon

Word count: 767

Namjoon is not the most affectionate person, often preferring to just exist in each other’s company

That being said, he does like it when you cling to him; you bring out his soft side

If you’re shorter than him, he’ll rest his chin on the top of your head

Although he’s not very into PDA, he does like to be able to either see you or touch you, happy to even just observe you while you do something 

The way he shows his love for you most often is by making time for you and showing you that you’re a priority to him 

Spare time is very rare and precious, so he makes sure to make time for you, even if it’s not easy

He enjoys taking care of you and feeling like you can depend on him to provide, but it also warms his heart when you do anything to provide for him as well (cooking for him, buying him gifts, etc.)

When he’s working, he tends to fixate on what he’s doing and forget to eat; when you bring him food or water or send him reminders to take care of himself, he feels grateful to have you in his life

He’s not afraid to admit his flaws, but it does bring him a special kind of peace when the two of you just lay in bed and talk about your own flaws with each other; to know he can be imperfect and still be loved is a healing thing to know 

Likes having intellectual discussions with you about philosophy, cosmology, and just anything that lets him see more into the inner workings of your mind 

He loves when you match his energy, whether he’s being goofy and dancing around like a maniac, or if he’s in a more spiritual and thoughtful mood; it makes him feel like you understand him in a way few others do

Likes coming up with places to go with you and events/activities you can experience together

Prefers shared experiences to buying you physical gifts

Has a hard time being very cutesy, he almost always gets shy and covers his face, especially if he does aegyo 

Despite his shyness, he enjoys it when you compliment him; especially if you call him handsome and/or smart

He used to be insecure about his nose, so he still gets a little shy if you kiss him on the nose

Has a tendency to wrap himself around you when you’re sleeping together 

Can’t and won’t stop taking pictures of you

Even though he can’t post them, his gallery on his phone is mostly photos of you, whether you’re at a museum, in nature somewhere, or just looking cute while asleep

He loves doing little photoshoots of you and showing you off to the people that know about you

Since he takes so many photos of you, it makes him happy when you take nice pictures of him too

It makes him happy knowing that you feel the same urge to show him off, that he feels about you

It’s pretty common for you to either be on an adventure together or just staying inside with good books

He leaves you little notations in the books he’s already read because you once said it makes you feel like he’s reading it with you

Takes pictures of the scenery around him whenever you’re apart; plants, pretty rocks, crab, you name it, he’s sent you a picture of it 

“I didn’t want to bother the bugs under this rock but look how pretty it is!”

If he ever has to travel without you, he sends you the prettiest postcards he can find with the cheesiest messages on them 

“It’s raining here today; even the sky is sad you’re not with me”

Draws little Koyas on his letters and postcards to you

If he knows he’ll be gone from you for a long time, he’ll leave letters for you to read when you miss him 

Writes short poems for you when he’s feeling sentimental and will leave them on sticky notes and index cards for you to find

Writes snippets of songs about different mythos of soulmates when he thinks about you 

Tells you about the myth of humans being created; how we were all made with four arms, four legs, and two heads, then cursed to spend our lives wandering in search of our other half 

“Despite the distance, I feel at peace knowing that I’ve found my other half; I don’t feel the need to search for anything anymore. I found what I need”

[ahundredtimesover]

Fic ideas I’ll probably never write

A The Light or Dead Stars spin-off where Namjoon goes to the ER after a little kitchen accident at his friend’s cafe that he’s managing and meets you, the ER doctor. You’re amused that this built, highly intelligent man is so clumsy, especially when he returns the next week to ask for a prescription to treat the rash he got after catching some crabs.

You see him again on your way home from a night shift bc the cafe is just about to close and he offers to make you tea and you end up talking all morning. He seems like he’s constantly looking for something, or for his home to feel like home again. He wants to stay in one place this time, but when a dream role in an art gallery in New York is offered to him, you wonder if he’ll keep chasing whatever it is he can’t find or if he’ll think you’re finally someone worth staying in Seoul for.

Something like that. But I keep thinking of the contrast in their lives - the chaos of the ER and the tranquility of the coffee shop. How OC finds herself constantly searching for Namjoon’s warmth and how she realizes that much as she’s stayed in one place all her life, she’s not sure if this feels like home, either.

[soraviie]

them as boyfriends.txt

━ type: bts x gn! reader  ━  masterlist

━ about: fluff  ━  pictures taken from Pinterest

━ previously posted on soraviii

NAMJOON:

Conversations! I am extremely chill about it but still insistent

Conversations about stuff!

Doesn't even have to be like here's the top 10 reasons why Auguste Comte was a cunt but like overall

Why do you enjoy doing some things and why are these things his hobbies you know

Why he knows that some of his habits are bad but he can't seem to stop them and so on

I always think that Namjoon is very concerned about doing the Right Thing, you know, being an objectively good person within a subjectively impossible world he probably worries a lot about "oh, was this thing I said perhaps going to rub you off the long way", "is what I'm doing with my influence enough, is it right?" "oh, you said it was okay but could it be that when I did this you wish I didn't and so on"

Wants to do right by the people he loves so open, frequent communication he views as an opportunity to improve and be assured that he's not an ignorant tool

A multifaceted individual so you get to see all sides - cute and cuddly, shy and embarrassed, the hoe side

Does absolutely wake you up in the mornings like "get up, sucker, we're going somewhere, get up"

Often says he's bringing you to a little something and it could be anywhere between a specific tree in a park and a booked-out art gallery during the night

Tries to echolocate you if he's out and forgot to take his glasses

He's insecure that he can't cook so he probably cleans a lot

Probably has read an article about weaponized incompetency and therefore tries to split chores evenly and keep them regularly done

He's actually torn up he can't do most things he would want like - wait for you after work or walk along the river freely

So he puts the extra effort in all he gets - lazy mornings, eating brunch abroad etc.

I can for some reason imagine him slow driving a bike at night and you're walking beside

Why is he not giving you a lift? He's scared he'll crash and you'll be hurt

If you can drive and own a car he will indicate that he wants to be driven not by asking but by sitting in the seat and putting a seat belt on in front of your eyes

When on tour or working late nights sends you short videos of the animals he finds along the way (think of that Instagram video of him harassing a crab on the way home from work)

Deep morning voice! Lord!

Absolutely the one on the list to have sex to relieve pent-up anger

Sleeps shirtless

Just get like ear plugs or straight-up knock yourself out because I just know he snores like a whole ass truck

If he's in love, really, I mean truly in love you're straight up becoming immortalized in the songs

Like he assigns a symbol that he associated to you whether a specific flower or a word or a concept but it's a little thing that keeps mentioned throughout

If it's a private track will ask you to moan for it to be used in a track

On like one day in a year when you convince him to be lazy, for sure, sits and watches TV with like a passive-aggressive frown and munches on chips really loudly

It's not even a bad show it's just how his face looks then

When meeting your friends, has an awkward "smile and wave, boy, smile and wave" stance

Definitely plays up his hotness once in a while - sleazy smiles, and those bedroom eyes, there are two wolves within him, a romantic and a player

If you're walking through an art gallery, for sure talks about every single thing he sees

The way you're on his Instagram is by sharing the photos you take, through them he can see the man you fell in love with and he becomes giddy over it

YOONGI:

So hear me out but when Yoongi is crushing he's like a boyfriend, when he's in a relationship he's like a married man with two kids and a mortgage

It's not that the spark is missing (guy can get you hot and bothered in a matter of seconds, you know what I'm saying) but it's literal comfort

Everything about him is comfort

He's like what men think men should be but so much better

E.g. fixes stuff - lamps, chairs, bulbs

Has plans on doing renovation

He never does it but he insists that when he gets the free time-!

"Next weekend."

"Yoon, you said it last weekend."

"Yeah, and eventually I'll do it. Consistency is key."

If he's home and you're there cooks meals 100%

For some reason, I always think he's really into cooking breakfast

It's more likely for him to cook breakfast than dinner because he would oftentimes order it in

Soft lighting in the apartment, no overhead lights

His type of touching is subtle

When you're watching say a movie, he doesn't lean into you wholly but like sits and keeps a hand slumped on your knee

Listen to this - fleeting hand holding

If you're keeping your hand on the table and he's near, he'll stroke your hand for 3 seconds take it away and repeat

Touches your pinky with his - it's like saying "hey"

Now hear me out, gossip

Jimin is for sure the no.1 gossiper but Yoongi is not too far behind himself

You're getting the freshest hottest brew about every single idol and producer he finds repulsive

Not too big of an outdoors guy but he'll do literally anything for you so if you want to go on like a few-day retreat, you sit him down and ask him:

"Is this something you want?"

"Yes -ㅅ-"

"Be honest! Are you really okay with going away this weekend and doing absolutely no work?"

"You'll be happy -ㅅ- yes -ㅅ-"

Hates it but you're happy so he's happy

I think he gets a little bit insecure about his partner not being to be able to do a lot of things so he spoils them a lot - trips and rest days and such

Is a hypocrite though

If you drink a lot of coffee nags the shit out of you only to drink seven cups himself

And here's the hill I'm going to die on - really strict when it comes to eating sweets before proper meals

He might be chill when you say you're not hungry, it sometimes happens you know, but will not! have it! for you to eat candy before dinner!

"What are you - my mom?" you sneer as he shOVES a pack of gummy worms into a deep, dark corner of a pantry where it most likely will never see the light of the sun ever again

"I'll call her," he warns, stirring whatever he was cooking that evening. "Don't test me."

Fights with him are rare and very diplomatic

He treasures you a lot so he takes a logical stance and flat out states "we both could say something hurtful, let's take a breather"

If you're in a foul mood and anNOYED at everything and itching for a fight, he'll cock an eyebrow and just say: "Is that really something you want to be spoken out there?"

Sometimes gets you cute plushies

You once walked in on him reading omegaverse fanfic and no, there is no backstory, nor an explanation given

Holds an incredibly harsh critique of snacks

Tastes a chip, hates it, discARDS the packet with a "d i s g u s t i n g"

You will absolutely hear a fuck ton of "back in my day" and "these are not Korean nuts, these are x nuts, they're no good"

Somehow I think he shits himself more before meeting your friends than parents???

Because he knows how to get along with older people but your friends who are convinced he's going to cheat on you, he's nothing but another over-inflated popstar stroking his ego? not a clue, he's a lost boy

He's so humble and helpful that, of course, he wins them over

Probably has driven your friends somewhere where they need to be, like a reception, probably offered his car for moving purposes (does anyone else help their friends move in and out of places?)

When on long car rides absolutely tries to gaslight you by saying the most impossible shit like:

"Of course, there is."

"There are no rivers in the Gobi desert!"

"But there are! Ancient people, how do you think they managed to travel all that distance? It's because they got to the river and that replenished them halfway."

Actually just wants to talk to you and this is an easy way to do so

dRUNK Yoongi just think about it and enjoy, he's so giggly and smiley and probably calls out for you with annoying frequency

Your nickname is an inside joke, many don't think it's cute at all but you know better and that's what's important

JIN:

Gets irrationally shy even after dating you after a while, say, you're changing and he walks in, for some reason puts a hand in front of his eyes??

Definitely covers his body if you're checking him out

"Can we please have some respect? Some decorum?" he whines, neck flushing at an alarming speed

Annoys you a lot, he's the annoying boyfriend

Tells the most ridiculous things, like:

"______________, I was in the bathroom and I did this," flicks hair. "And wow, I'm just so handsome. You must be a very strong person indeed to be able to bear it every day."

His confidence is a Schrodinger's cat - half true, half - farce

Somedays he wakes up and doesn't feel it at all and hides away from you saying he's ugly right now

Please assure him a lot during that time

If you work too much he's the best remedy for that

Jin is wise and helps you see how your time is the most important thing, that you don't have to prove your existence to anyone and can occupy space without proving your worth over and over again

Conversations with him don't often delve into deep waters but at the same time you don't feel unheard because he listens very attentively even if he doesn't share these anxieties and concerns

Does, unfortunately, give you secondhand embarrassment quite often

Has and will wear ridiculous outfits that have people turning their heads around

You're trailing with him, hand in hand, head low and Jin's ears too are flaming like gasoline on fire but who is he to prohibit himself from indulging things

Most likely to want morning sex, I will not elaborate

He has a special soft smile for when he feels properly cared for and babied

Appreciates being given flowers, hair tugged behind the ear

He doesn't give a fuck what's a norm, it makes him feel nice, fuck you, he'll continue doing it

If you find fishing boring, sorry you'll have to put up with it

"I guess this will be our thorn, honey, you'll just have to endure this for love"

He takes no shit, not even from you but in return never, ever prohibits you from enjoying things

For example, diving into ice-cold water in a lake is not his idea of a fun time but if you enjoy it, he'll be by the side shivering with a towel and a thermos

Definitely, 100% rehearses meeting your parents and quizzes you on his

It is no surprise at all when you meet that both of you know just the right words, the right gestures

Jin loves his family and to be put in a conflict between you and them is a walking nightmare

So he does his best to avoid that

You often eat at very random places scattered throughout the town and sometimes out of it

One day it's a luxury five-star restaurant in a penthouse, the next you're sitting on a wobbly chair at a marketplace, eating a small vegetable or meat skewer from a plastic cup

But Jin always knows how to bring a good time, so both times are just perfect

HOSEOK:

Okay so if this makes sense but Hoseok is the type of boyfriend who wants you to improve

So he wouldn't be super clingy or overly protective or madly jealous but he shows his care by reminding you to do self-care

Like skincare routine, morning and night he's there to ask you if you did it

Or whether you ate well, why not, why are you neglecting care in your life

I don't see him as overly romantic like big-ass gestures but really consistent care from the start

Now hear me out and don't tussle, he partially views you as a responsibility and a project

and befORE YOU GET PITCHFORKS LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING

He works hard, correct?

He's a strict teacher and absolutely works himself 100% for maximum improvement

And it's not like he's hovering over you like a helicopter parent, moulding you into a version of his liking I just think he wants you to be the person you really like

So obviously it depends on what your goals are but he's really quietly motivating you to do better for yourself

It may not sound most romantic but at its core he wants you to be happy and I think he realises that it doesn't always just means being loved by a close person

So he wants you to improve, feel better about yourself and feel better about the world in such a way

Because the world is a very dark place, it can't handle even more negativity

Kinky, 0 explanation iykyk

A hype man for sure

If you're ever feeling like you can't do something he'll convince you that at the very least there's not so much loss involved as you think

Handmade jewellery especially if he's been away for a long time

I imagine him sitting at a studio, taking like a 15-minute break and he's tinkering with beads, arranging them and stringing them into a bracelet tailored to your interests

Buys you clothes more than anything else say like a car or a house

He splurges reasonably

Though them triangle bags he had back in the day cost like 300 that's my whole rent homie

It's hard to read what he'd be like as a boyfriend but out of all most likely to feel like a friend with added stuff

Which isn't bad at all

I think he struggles between the view of love in the traditional sense he's been taught and interpreting it his own, more peculiar way

Buys subtly matching clothes

Has a private Instagram and definitely hypes you up there

If he's upset but not overtly mad, he'll lie in the bed and Complain using full VFX of Hobi sound effects

Somehow managed to friendzone you once

As an act of revenge, you did that as well and now has learnt his lesson

100% has inner demons but out of all is the most likely to not share it, above Yoongi, above all

He doesn't struggle with communication per se but struggles with understanding that he himself can have faults and he doesn't have to do everything alone

He holds people he loves in high standard hence why he's so insistent on self-care; on being the best you can be within your own eyes, so it makes complete sense that he holds himself up to the highest standard, cutting himself the least amount of slack

Makes you feel like you're the most hilarious person in the world but doesn't talk much at home

If you feel awkward at an event and pressured will leave immediately, I just have a sense about this

JIMIN:

Has a knack for jealousy but the type to end with you being railed the entire night with his jaw clenched

I know we all like his cute side but he can be scary

He can be standoffish and sharp he just mostly chooses to not be

He chooses the high ground though that doesn't always mean he wants to take one

So if you have an ex he particularly loathes he will be near poisonous to that person

But lets it go because it's not about them, it's about you and you deserve his undivided attention

He needs assurance a lot because I think he's convinced himself you'll leave because honestly, it's a hard lifestyle to tolerate in a partner

Touchy but listen to this his favourite is not hugging you but leaning into you

Because it can be so variable

Like cutely leaning onto you whining at you at a full volume or pressing his nose in your cheek with a smirk

I have a feeling he'd enjoy it if you have some temper

He hates fights, absolutely abhors them, and probably has fights because he didn't voice something in the first place because he didn't want to fight

But if you're mad at someone else? If you're angry and getting heated and being bossy?

He just ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

But he often has ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he's in tune with his sensual side

Speaking of sensual, reads the most toe-curling, filthy romance books in his free time

I'm talking like casually sipping coffee and calmly listing through like a BDSM orgy

He's the type to try everything once, within reasons

Often when talking has a soft, whiny voice and holds a part of your body rubbing circles there

I can't imagine his flirty nature not getting him in trouble at some point

But he makes his commitment known in very intense ways

Like gripping your jaw, making eye contact and saying something along that he can't even sleep without you, you're in his bloodstream

Kind of corny but manages to make it sexy because it's Park Jimin

He wants to know everything about you - what you're thinking, why you're thinking it, what made you to be who you are now and who you want to be tomorrow

Desires to make eye contact

Steals more of your clothes than you do his

Drunk, kind of out of it dancing to slow, sexy songs is a MUST for him

In a way there are two parts to being loved by him which are very representative of his sides - one is cute and cuddly, wanting you to be happy, like an idealized version of kids being in love and the other one is hungry

He wants you in and out, if you're not his in the understanding that he knows you best, that he can please you physically and please you mentally by giving you comfort, he's not happy

Sentimental, probably secretly keeps tokens of yours from the beginning of the relationship

Has a copy of all your childhood pics, argue with a wall

The one true no. 1 gossiper, he knows everything about everyone like your workplace for example

He knows why exactly that co-worker of yours left for a two-week vacation and the reason is salacious as all hell while you could be sitting there - "I have a coworker by that name?"

If you're out and he sees someone being rude, will viOLATE them

His sense of humour could make a person suicidal fr

But unlike some, he uses his inside voice

Has things that annoy him in your relationship but I don't think he says it unless it's really bad

He lets small grudges pass hoping to preserve the balance

Because only the mere thought of you leaving terrifies him

Once Jimin ties himself to someone, genuinely, he doesn't want to let them go for nothing

If you're away for a long time, let's say going abroad or really busy with work, his emotions get the best of him and he gets quite upset

But he hides it and frankly somewhat succeeds

But you can also tell when you return home that he was missing you like crazy

He needs to be pampered then, reassured that everything's fine

Does everything you want even if it's not what he would usually do

If you feel like driving for a while to stare at the moon, he absolutely would

Seduces you over and over again

Partially I think the reason he changes up his behaviour so much is to make sure he's keeping you on your toes and you wouldn't leave

It's lowkey a phobia of his

It's so obvious he's dating you

You can just see the Love

Also if he would just stop glARING at strangers for bREATHING your direction, that would be great

Reminds you to do a lot of things but also needs those reminders as well

Often so tired he forgets to do basic things so you have to wrangle him to take a shower or brush his teeth before bed because he really works himself very hard :(

If you're on your phone when it's time to sleep will yANK it away like a mOTHER

Love to him means sticking together - always

TAEHYUNG:

bops

Oh, you're expecting an explanation?

You're not getting any :)

Very soft

Also very weird

Being his partner means being his interpreter at times

You two have probably developed a language of your consisting chiefly of sounds

Sends you a shit ton of selfies

Mostly stupid and often blurry

He's a blurry sort of guy

Has sent a selfie taken from underneath his nostril

You could be sitting at work and he sends you a wet, shirtless selfie

Cause he's a menace

Big enthusiast of having soft lights as well

It makes the atmosphere feel more intimate

Everything is about intimacy when he's with you

Emotional, spiritual, physical

Where Jimin is in love with love, Taehyung loves romance

So big, classic, romantic gestures are a part of the Kim course

Date nights are unavoidable even let's say you're in two different countries he'll find a way

Sometimes by spontaneously flying out, sometimes by arranging the most ridiculous zoom call known to man

Like the camera placed where you would sit across the table with a restaurant dinner in front

Buys you lingerie, jewellery and fancy clothes

Teases you about loving him

"Ah, ______________ your passion for me makes a guy shy."

Cue to you sitting like -_-

Cause by now you're tiRED

I imagine he does get on your nerves a lot but by weaponizing all of that infamous charm at this point you're convinced he could get away with breaching the Geneva conventions

Always looks at you like he's done absolutely NO WRONG

Even if it happened like 3 seconds ago

Gatekeeps you in a way

He wants you all to himself and he's afraid if you don't like his friends, you might end up not liking him as well

Really values your opinion of him

Has gone to a fortune teller to ask how your future would look like

When you're going through a tough time, he "lends" you his angel

Misses you like crazy when you're apart

And sometimes even when you're here

If he's miraculously drunk, you're not getting him off you

Fucking Clingatron 3000 over here practically treats you as a plushie when you go to sleep

If you're the more reserved type, he's simply over the moon trying to make you flustered

And if you're really cuddly, he invites it eagerly and joyously

Jump atop of him and he'll laugh head thrown back onto the bed

Absolutely the type to find you being angry quite cute, with the exception that you're not so mad you're breaking up with him

This is of course really annoying because what if you want to establish dOMINANCE

Well good luck with that

He'll just smooch you to pacifism

Is lowkey always horny

Has kinks but I do not have the strength to think about them

Every week attempts to cook a fancy meal which ends up being an inedible concoction tasting like an armpit sweat

Promises to not do it again but lo and behold next week!

Watches a lot of movies with you

Watches you if you're out

Really zones out when you're ordering or simply waiting for something

If you're both at home plays soft music in the background so he could pull you into dance at any time

Fresh flowers whenever the old ones wilt down :(

Brings you to a lot of hipster cafes late in the evening

Quite often says the most inappropriate shit at absolutely the wrong place and time

For example, you're about to throw the bins out and he casually lets it slide -

"What if we tried for a baby right now?"

Smiles at his phone when texting you

Recalling back to the finding you cute when angry, definitely smiles and chuckles to himself if you're being huffy and complaining about work or what some dumbass did today

Begs you to share food

The type to bump into you playfully when walking

If he's going to bed, you're going to bed (can't sleep without his plushie)

Increasingly ridiculous nicknames - honey, babe, dearest, flower, sweet bean, rice cake, jujubii (warps it to sound more cuter version of jujube)

Eats up every capitalized love celebration ever invented - white day, rose day, his own made - "our first kiss day"

Really sentimental in that way

I think he wants love to feel more like a movie than it necessarily is so tries his hardest to make that dream a reality

JUNGKOOK:

It is often and with an honestly worrying frequency that you think there is nothing but mii music behind those eyes

Zones out a lot

Stops mid-sentences

Sometimes forgets to listen when you're ranting

It's because he feels safe with you

He feels that he doesn't have to make perfect sense so his mind wanders a lot because he's very relaxed when with you

The type of guy who holds your legs crossed in his lap, one hand caressing your calf when watching a movie

Speaking of movies, yes, you probably have a whole list of tv shows to watch together

(which he absolutely cheats by squeezing in extra screen time)

But you know what he absolutely does

Plays the most horrible otome games known to man

I'm talking about the horse dating simulator, every and all butler romances in the app store

At first, it's just to make fun of it

But then naturally gets really competitive and complains quite hard if the butler he's supposed to be romancing doesn't like him

"Why are men so hard to please?" he growls, fingers gripping the phone so hard the knuckles are white. "I spent 45 diamonds on this dress and "okay" is all YOU CAN SAY?!"

Though you started the game together, he's the one to finish them because it's just slightly hard to develop a romantic interest in an anime pigeon for you but not for Jungkook

Does as he's told when it comes to chores - washing dishes, cleaning, laundry, does it all eagerly

If you're messy, nags you but doesn't go as hard as, for example, Hoseok

Before you stop by his apartment, 100% tried to make it more "palatable" for you

Meaning, shOVES those 7 mattresses of his lying around into a closet or something

Whilst he's pouring a glass of wine you hear a crash come from somewhere

"What's that??" you ask and he sweats, absolutely shits himself

"Nothing," he replies, voice squeaky

"Didn't sound like nothing..."

"...dON't even worry about it."

If he has to take out the bins and your high-heeled shoes are the only thing available, he'll be strutting down to the garbage like a Victoria's Secret model

Has switched those LED lights to red to try and dance sexily in front of you only to bump his crotch into the corner of a closet

You're 90% of his impulse control so if you're gone, expect to see him with one eyebrow upon returning

Has cried at least once about thinking how much he loves you

Turns up his hotness just to see what happens

Is HIGHKEY ready to go at any given point

Even if he's dead tired, he's like "just a quick, lazy sesh, okay 🥺🥺🥺"

If you're scolding him also does this 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Finds it absolutely hilarious and endearing if you're bossy

Obeys whilst giggling all throughout

Your ass is a source of comfort for him, it's not your ass it's OUR ass once you're with him

If you're close with your family, probably the one most likely to spend a lot of time with them (of course, only with you there cause he cannot handle that tension A L O N E)

When you first brought him to meet the fam, anytime you tried to leave he would look at you with a smile on his lips but wide panicked eyes, hissing:

"do nOT leAVE me"

"I need to go to the bathroom..."

"Hold it! for the love of gOD hOLD iT."

After a while, he's a bit more chill, the type to be brought along to every camping trip and cookout

Is probably used for labour by your relatives

No, does not send you memes, he's breaking the Gen Z stereotype as he's not attached to the hip with his phone

Makes a conscious effort to spend enough time with you

He can be weaponized to kill bugs, shoo away birds, glare threateningly at strangers

Gently wrestles you for fun

Really enjoys it if you take care of him, like put hair oil in his hair, massage his shoulders, cream his hands etc.

Doesn't like spending a lot of time hanging around somewhere so he whines in your ear

"Are you going to be done soon?"

"We just got here. I need to buy a new shirt."

"You have plenty at home and they all look great on you. Let's just go eat. There's online shopping for a reason."

Gets jealous a lot but never gets angry at you and quickly lets it go

Mostly pouts and fusses if he thinks you're being too friendly with someone

Sometimes utilizes you as weights whilst working out

Like makes you lay on top of him when he's doing push-ups

Adores if you try to manhandle him only to then show you how it's really done by taking a hold of your legs and hoisting you around his waist

You have had a talk about whether he'd choose Namjoon over you and the results of that debate were relayed to Namjoon himself who just looks at you both with a frown that says "what the hell are both of you on"

Gets lowkey combative if you have bad habits that impact your health like smoking, too much drinking, or not eating regularly

Health to him is very important in spite of you pointing out the hypocrisy of it

As he often fails to take proper care of himself

But he tries so he wants you to try your best as well

Makes a secret tattoo about you

Like your favourite flower, or a favourite thing

Similar to how Namjoon immortalizes you in a way, but on his flesh

Sings around the house but is too shy to give you concerts

Sneaks you into the studio, however, for you to express your opinion

Sneaks you into a lot of places

Like an afterparty or a press conference

A member will see you and wonder out loud:

"I think I saw _____ walking by."

"You're just getting old, seeing things," Jungkook replies trying not to seem too guilty

You can absolutely tell if he has a surprise planned for you

"Jungkook, are you planning to bring me on a secret date?"

"0.0 no 0.0"

If you're mercilessly destroying him at a game, he threatens to cry

Would get upset at you for something he dreamt

Glares at you over coffee cup:

"You said you liked Yoongi better than me."

"In a dream you Dumbo," you roll your eyes. "I'm literally making you breakfast."

He answers with a vague hum, then turns up his nose, all offended:

"Said you liked his hip thrust more."

Wants to adopt more dogs, so you'll have someone to keep you company when he's on tour :( and so that they could protect you in case of home invasion or stalkers

© soraviii/soraviie 2022-2023

[btsicedtea]

namjoon: where's the crab i brought from the beach?

seokjin: *uncovering the seafood boil* wait you didn't bring this for dinner?

namjoon: ...

seokjin:...

the rest of bangtan:...

namjoon: start praying

[absentcaryatid]

"reader seduces joon with facts about sea creatures" This alone would sell me on the story but in addition there is so much more to love! For one thing, I can hear this story:

you slide your bowl and drink to the other side of the table and grab a nearby chair. setting it down, you take a smug seat, leaning back in it as you slip the chopsticks out of the crisp paper sleeve. you snap them apart and crack open the bottle of soft drink.

Sound details add so much to the this sweet and realistic tale of how these guys got together. There is also a really well done balance of being adversarial without being annoying, other than to Namjoon.

“your hair constantly looks as if you’ve stepped freshly from a car quickie.” “i hear jealousy,” you tease. namjoon purses his lips, lowering his laptop lid. you lean back in your seat with a triumphant glitter in your eyes. “admit it,” you tell him. “you envy me. i mean, who wouldn’t? i know a lot about whale sharks and old ships, still have outstanding student debt, and still look absolutely stunning in a wetsuit.” he forces a smile, and your grin widens as he drops forward on his elbows. he must be particularly short-fused today; it usually takes a lot longer for him to crack. it wasn’t even your best attempt. “keep it in your pants, narcissus. you wear spandex and find things buried in the sand – great. a five-year-old can do that. do you know what a five-year-old can’t do? my job.”

I'm sitting here laughing at the name Narcissus, and who wouldn't be attracted to someone who knows whale shark facts? I like this reader character a lot. Also Namjoon's sense of ethics when he can only let himself be attracted after clearing up an unsavory rumor about the reader's actions as a teacher.

The reader's defense of the conditions students survive under also won my heart. To discover he and his aquarium residents watch Blackadder together made him even more attractive. The reader and Namjoon sound very good for each other and it was heartwarming to see them figure that out.

Thank you for sharing yet another delicious story, Jun.

ONLY ONES WHO KNOW !!

!!   knj x m!reader

!!   wc | 5.8k

!!   tags | joon/reader are around 30 (implied), drinking, suggestive (reader comes off a little subby, but not as a bottom), reader seduces joon with facts about sea creatures, i don’t know how to write people who hate each other so the relationship is more like annoying x annoyed

[ event masterlist ]

professors of different faculties

seven minutes in heaven

“is that the best you can do?”

kim namjoon, head of the ‘historical’ aspect of the university's school of philosophical, historical, and international studies, is a terrible man to make an enemy of. his frowns are sharp and his tongue is sharper, lashing at loud talkers during his lectures and idiotic faculty heads alike, and he is never seen without a perfectly-pressed three-piece suit.

despite his severe outfits and hard-to-impress attitude, the passion he has for anthropology resonates in his voice, in his hands, and in his shoulders. his smooth voice grows quick and bouncy when he covers prehistoric art and relates cueva de las manos to the modern family, or even the brief few slides about the denisovan girl. he’s usually a patient person, a trait that many of his students can attest to, but when it comes to one man, every notion of it flies out the window with a crash.

you. you. maritime archaeology was your schtick. you did your postgraduate studies overseas, and you could often be found nattering away with your students in their mother tongue. he wanted to dislike you – you, with your messy folded sleeves and lack of a tie – but when you turned to him, all shining eyes and little waves, he could feel the chains of the drawbridge loosen just one notch more.

“he-llo, professor kim.”

he doesn’t look up, tapping away at his laptop. “seat’s taken, yn.”

your brow furrows briefly and you glance around, meeting the eyes of a few mutual students who look on with feigned disinterest. you glance back down at him and set your white bowl of katsu curry on the table. “you? waiting on a friend? i thought i was your only one.”

you move to sit down, but he grabs his bag and dumps it on the chair beside him – all without looking away from his screen.

Keep reading

[hamsterclaw]

Fic Library: Namjoon

A list of incredible fics I've read and re-blogged on my (almost) 2 years on here. These stories all celebrate our fave big, brainy, clumsy, sometimes annoying, always sexy Joon, check them out and give these authors some love!

The Body Through Time by @yeoldontknow. KNJ x f! reader, sexy academia AU. Angsty fic with Namjoon as a smouldering brainiac.

Goodnight Nabi by @sahmfanficbts. Get used to seeing Sam's handle in my lists because she's one of my fave writers and a lovely person to boot. KNJ x f! reader, sexy DILF mechanic Namjoon. A sexy, beautiful fic with Sam's signature hope and heart.

Pronoia by @junghelioseok. KNJ x reader, college + zombie apocalypse AU. A cracky, funny, zingy story with guest appearances from other members - including JK and Yoongi.

Booty Jorts by @miscelunaaa, who also has a good showing in my fic recs for her top notch writing and just being a great human. KNJ x f! reader - this is a smuttily delicious gem.

Shell-ter by @miscelunaaa. Hermit crab! Namjoon x marine biologist reader. I genuinely think about this grumpy (crabby?!) Namjoon all the time.

Scent of a woman by @sahmfanficbts. Leopard hybrid parfumerie boss! Namjoon x employee f! reader. There's always so much humanity in Sam's stories, and this does not disappoint.

How I love you by @ahundredtimesover. KNJ x f! reader. A 28k beautiful musing on love and marriage that's thought-provoking and sensitively written.

Seoul Redemption by @sahmfanficbts. Forger! KNJ x single mom! reader. A gorgeously realised imagining with a noir vibe and very human characters.

Park and Ride (Explicit) by @here2bbtstrash. KNJ x reader, idolverse. The first story I read by M, and it made me want to read so much more of her work. Sexy, fast-paced, and this Namjoon is swoonworthy.

Holding on letting go by @augustbutwinter. KNJ x gn! reader. August is queen of the short impactful drabble but her longer pieces are just as incredible. A sad, angsty, truthful, beautifully realised gem.

Cuffing Szn by @miscelunaaa. FBI agent KNJ x soft-bodied/plus-sized reader. Joon's an FBI agent, he's big and sexy, do you really need to know any more?

Reckless by @vyduan. Part of the Her multiverse. KNJ x reader, also featuring JJK x reader, idolverse. I started reading vyduan's writing when I first got into BTS fanfic, and apart from being a fucking fantastic writer, she's also an all-round good egg with a razor sharp wit. Reckless is hot and sexy and reader is gritty, strong and kickass. Namjoon is the arrogant pompous asshole of my dreams in this.

Fall apart & redefine by @ugh-yoongi. Idol KNJ x f! reader. Namjoon's music and musings give off sadboi vibes to me, and this gorgeous, angsty story captures all of that. Stunning.

On the line 1 by @augustbutwinter. KNJ x reader. I was only speaking the truth when I said August writes drabbles like no other. Short, cute and impactful.

Hey, it's me by @yoongiphoria. Exes Namjoon x reader. I remember reading this for the first time around the time Indigo came out and thinking how perfectly it captured the vibe of the album. I still love it now.

Untitled by @ahundredtimesover. An idolverse AU ft KNJ and f! reader. Musings on loss and impermanence and legacies also inspired by Indigo.

If this is all we can do by @yoongiphoria. A follow up to Hey, it's me, linked above, that made me stop skim reading and pay attention. Angsty, full of longing and just a great read.

The package thief by @blog-name-idk. KNJ x f! reader, enemies to lovers. I'm a fan of Mango's cracky humour, and it comes through in this judgy, petty and somehow also endearing Namjoon.

Shut up! by @daechwitatamic. KNJ x gn reader. I love it when a story alludes to Namjoon being annoying and I especially like how reader shuts him up. Smutty, sexy and so so good.

Envy by @whatifyoulivelikethat. KNJ x f! reader. Love this author's general DGAF vibes, and they've also written some of my favourite stories. Namjoon's gorgeously written and darkly sexy in this. So so hot.

The one with Namjoon and the u-haul by @eoieopda. KNJ x Jeon! reader. Jade's writing is sharply hilarious and this is a perfect example. A dreamy, sexy Namjoon and a lil shit JK.

Pheromones by @rmnamjoons. Spaceship captain Joon x spaceship botanist reader, sci-fi AU. The fic that introduced me to the concept of sex pollen and a sexy, sex-crazed yet somehow still chivalrous Namjoon.

Promise Me KNJ x f! reader, JJK x f! reader, military AU, by @sahmfanficbts. A beautifully written, tender love story that made me cry and reflect on my life. Sam writes emotions like no one else.

Additional notes: A few of my favourite Namjoon stories, are only on AO3, for which I've created a separate post.

[tiedyeflannels]

No Rush

Kim Namjoon x reader

A/N: Yo! Here's a little Namjoon blurb for his birthday AND as a thank you for 100 followers!! It means a lot that you guys like what I write! Anyway, I hope you're okay with bugs... Enjoy!

WC: <1K

Masterlist

“Ah, this is so nice,” you sighed as you stretched your arm over your head. A breeze rustled the midsummer leaves as you and Namjoon walked through a nearby park.

“And you didn’t want to get up,” he teased while letting out a chuckle which made you glare at him.

“You tried waking me up at 7:30! Of course I didn’t want to get up!”

He laughed at your dramatics before taking your hand in his.

“But this is still nice. The cool breeze. The calm, quiet atmosphere. You,” he said, squeezing you hand a bit to convey a bit more emotion in the statement.

You turned toward him just to see him turn his gaze away from you as a light blush started to settle on his cheeks.

“You got embarrassed, didn’t you,” you smiled and teased him, knowing that he usually did when he said something cheesy while trying to be romantic.

You laughed as he turned his head away, basically confirming your question.

You leaned closer and held his bicep in a little hug, “Don’t worry, I thought it was cute. And I agree. It’s nice being here with you, too.”

You settled into relaxed conversation as you continued walking with no real destination in mind, just enjoying the scenery and each other’s company when something caught your eye.

You let go of you hold on Namjoon as you walked a few feet ahead and looked down at the sidewalk, much to his confusion. Sure enough, the thing that caught your eye was laying on the cement by you feet.

A cicada.

You bent down to pick the little creature and brushed your finger against one of its legs to try and wake it up. You smiled once it slowly started to move. Turning it rightside up, you walked back to Namjoon so show him what you found.

“Joonie, look!”

You moved the hand that had the cicada closer to him so he could see, but he moved away with furrowed brows.

“Y/n/n! What the- why are you holding it?!”

You rolled eyes as you brought it closer to you to look at it. “Calm down, it’s just a cicada. It’s not going to kill you.”

Watching it just stand on you hand, you placed it on your shirt since you figured that it just needed to warm up a bit before leaving.

Namjoon looked, almost disgusted, at the cicada just sitting on your shirt making you laugh. “What? Don’t you hold crabs?”

“Yeah, crabs. Not bugs.”

You deadpanned as you started to walk again, “Dude. A cicada’s not going to hurt you. Worst thing that happens is that it makes a little noise.”

Namjoon walked with you, but at a distance that was almost laughable.

“Yeah, but it’s- ugh… a bug. How can you hold it?”

You chuckled as you grabbed the little guy in your hand again once it start moving a bit more.

“When I was younger, a teacher of mine would make us hold any cicada we found on our walks. When we didn’t want to, she would ask us how we would overcome life’s problems if we couldn’t overcome the fear of holding a little bug. So over time, we looked forward to grabbing any cicada we came across.”

Namjoon hummed as he watched the cicada walk around your palm and pondered about what you said.

“Anyway, are you ready,” asked, closing you hand around your little friend.

“For what,” Namjoon asked, confused.

“Watch,” you said as you threw the cicada into the air and watched as it flew away.

“You know… I could learn something from you. Maybe I should start holding them, too,” he suggested, once you both started walking again.

You looked at him and nodded, “Yeah! Plus, it’s a pretty cool skill to have so you can freak out your friends.” 

He laughed, “Yeah. Then, I guess I’ll start trying.”

You smiled.

“Perfect! Then we can start now,” you said as you bent down to pick up another cicada and offered it to him.

It gave him pause before he shook his head, “Nevermind! I’ll try later.”

You threw the cicada into the grass and held his hand, “That’s okay. You can start whenever you like. There’s no rush.”

[unique-high]

[7:02pm] | Namjoon x blk fem reader.

“Namjoon made falling In love easy.” You thought as you watched your boyfriend carefully pick up a crab. He runs over to you smiling, just to show you how cute this little crab was.

There's an innocence to the things he says and does, but he also reminds you that he's a flawed human too and you like that.

Namjoon never tried to be a perfect boyfriend, but he did. He showed you a love that felt like all the love songs you would listen to back in middle school before you even fully grasped the concept of what it means to love someone romantically.

All the love songs you listen to now contain fragments of him. You always thought if you two ever broke up, you could never listen to those songs the same way again or even listen to them at all after him.

You watched Namjoon run down the beach with his arms out as he yelled, scaring the seagulls. The birds squawking pierced the evening sky as they took off flying. You sink your toes in the warm, gritty brown sand.

You think back to the promise you made your mama before you left home for Uni. “I promise I'll only focus on my studies and nothing else.”

But months later, on a rainy Sunday morning, you sent your mama a text saying: “Forgive me, mama. But there's this guy and I really like him a lot.”

A smile grew across your face hearing Namjoon call your name as he ran up to you. He found some pretty seashells he wanted to show you.

He grabbed your hand, laughing pulling you along with him. There's magic in his laughter that makes you believe in love again.

[daichiduskdrop]

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚⋆·˚ ༘ *𝙎𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙡 ⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Chapter 27

Pairing: BTS Ot7 X fem! reader

Genre: A/B/O AU, Fluff, Angst, Strangers to lovers,

Warnings: slight implications of unhealthy eating habits

Words: 3352

Taglist:@thelilbutifulthings @ilovemoneymorethenmen @singukieee @cherrysainttt @felicityroth @mageprincess7 @lucis-noctiana @danielle143 @osakis-gf @girl-nahh @vintageoldfashion @neverthefirstchoice @juju-227592 @silentreadersthings @i-have-no-life-charlie @everyonehatesshani @iamkookiesforyou @dragons-flare @fangirl125reader @roseidol @frieschan @popcatx0 @liz67900 @exfolitae

Previous:

⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ *

Holding you close to his chest, Namjoon let his lips brush up against your neck, only a small bit away from your scent gland. You let him take care of you, the alpha gentle with you in his arms.

It didn't take much longer before a knock sounded, making most of you look up. With the packalpha's arms holding you even closer, gently moving your face into the crook of his neck.

Inside came a soft call from a woman's voice about having some of the ordered meals already delivered. Yoongi, who sat closest to the doors, went over, murmuring thanks, before he took the two paper bags of delivery.

It wasn't everything by no means, but a part of their meal had arrived, so he placed it on the coffee table. Taehyung and Jungkook were the quickest to look over what was inside.

Taking one bag each, they both started pulling out the things inside, with a box of four corndogs first to be opened. They looked quite appetizing, with a bit of ketchup and sugar sprinkled on each one.

„Oh wah...” Jin mumbled, taking one right away before the youngest even got around to it. „Hyung! Bunbun gets the first one! Sweetie, choose which one looks the best, baby."

Jungkook whined softly, frowning at the eldest. Chuckling nervously, the alpha placed the corn dog back in the packaging, letting the young alpha show you the small paper box.

„It's ok-okay, thank you, Oppa." You said softly, your hands tightening onto Namjoon's, the packalpha returned the gesture right away.

Letting your head rest up against his collarbone again, Jungkook sighed softly, placing the package down, his hands wrapping gently around your cheeks.

Turning your face towards him, the alpha's face was filled with concern. He didn't feel right having you not eat while they did. The youngest understood that it most likely wasn't just you not being truly hungry either.

You had been eating so well the whole time, and he was worried about what triggered this. Have you been just feeling too anxious in the building? There were many people you didn't know around, was that it?

Kissing your forehead gently, he smiled softly at you. „It's okay, my little bunny. Don't worry, baby, okay? He whispered softly, letting his fingers gently caress your cheeks.

„How about onigiri kitty? Look what alpha ordered for you, sweet kitten." Handing you a plastic package already opened for you, the second eldest smiled softly at you, his eyes gentle on your form.

Reaching out for the small box, he placed it in your palms—the nicely stacked up rice triangles with neat rows of sushi - there was cooked shrimp, squid and octopus, salmon rue, a shrimp roll, and avocado, eel, and crab hosomaki too.

When they noticed the way your home cuisine sparked a bit of interest in you, Hobi was quick to reach for a pair of chopsticks laying around, breaking them apart for you before he handed them to you.

„Here, sunshine, have a taste, bub.” He smiled softly at you, ruffling up your hair before he quickly tamed it back down, chuckling gently.

Hovering over the takeout for a second, you chose to eat a few of the sushi rolls first, chewing on the crab one first; the colour was intriguing.

Breathing out softly, Namjoon let his lips linger on top of your head for a few good seconds, gently running his hands up and down your arms.

„Thank you, pup.” He whispered softly, watching you fondly while you ate a little bit from the takeout. The packmembers felt their hearts calm down a little bit, and they themselves dug in—another two bags arriving in the mean time.

„Here, princess, take a bite for alpha... It's really tasty, isn't it? You like it, baby? Have some more, my precious little thing."

Jimin gently urged you on, placing the box full of chicken marinated in some sauce and udon noodles hidden underneath, sprinkled with sesame seeds on top of your lap.

He didn't give you the chopstics, picking up a small bite-sized piece himself before he gently moved it to you with a hand underneath, making sure you wouldn't get dirty.

Smiling widely at you and chewing with a satisfied face, the alpha was quick to feed you a bunch of the udon noodles, but when you gently placed the box back in his hands, he only smiled gently.

„Peaches, sweetie, taste this; it's really nice, hm? It's soft and chewy; you'll like it, alpha promises.” Letting you bite into the large, filed-up dumpling, you nodded a little, satisfied with the taste.

You couldn't really tell what the filling was, but there was definitely a bit of beef. It was tasty, but after you chewed everything up, you didn't feel like eating much more.

Sipping on the pink drink you received not long ago, you all enjoyed the lunch together, everyone munching on something.

Declining the offered bites of pizza, noodles, and cucumber salad, you rested back up against Namjoon, the packalpha pulling you to himself gently.

With your stomach feeling full, you felt cosy enough to let your eyes flutter shut. Noticing your tired and sleepy eyes, he left his scent cloud over with calming pheromones, one of the attributes brought in by being an alpha.

His pack members noticed the difference in his scent immediately, looking over as if they thought something was wrong. Seeing you just cuddling up to the man as he helped you rest fully, had them calm down, the alphas soon following suit.

And so, the room changed it's whole aroma into a soft, calm, sleepy-like den. Namjoon finished up the bite of his pizza before he rested back himself, gently caressing your temples and hair.

It didn't take too long for you to fall asleep, having them notice the way your breathing slowed down and turned more soft, your scent going down in intensity.

Placing the plastic cup you still held back on the coffee table, Jungkook smiled gently at you, his eyes lingering on your form for a moment.

„Hyung,... I want Y/N as our 'mega." The youngest whispered, looking up at the packalpha. Namjoon smiled widely, chuckling at the sudden confession.

To be truthful, it was quite unnatural for the young alpha to get attached so quickly; since he was the youngest, he got cared for for a long time, even though he discovered his second gender pretty much just as they debuted and formed a pack.

Jungkook struggled sometimes with it, agitated that his packmates would feel the need to take care of him—he didn't need it after all; he was an alpha and therefore could take care of himself well enough.

But still, with the packmembers often pampering him a little bit, have it be teasing or not, he grew used to it for a few years, his naturally dominant side hiding for a while.

The youngest struggled getting to know different girls and getting attached to them; no matter how many omegas their company offered them, none of them felt right, whether they were older or younger than him, girls or not—it just didn't work.

He would sometimes think that it didn't matter if it felt right or not; since he technically couldn't know how it would feel when the puzzle pieces fell together, how could he know this wasn't how it would go?

Still, over the years, Jungkook always felt weird, taking care of omegas or even betas, even though it should have fulfilled any of his urges.

Now that he was maturing, he felt his second gender side growing more calm and collected, not as overpowering as once before, even though he was still quite far from being fully ready for bigger steps in his life.

And when he saw you, when he noticed your scent, the alpha realised that none of what was before mattered anymore—you were there now, and he knew this was right.

Mating and marking you would be a step in the future, that was certain, but every good pack would keep the courting process long and slow; it was important to not overwhelm the omegas.

Oftentimes not the most caring alphas would mate the first heat that would strike, and after that, their ruts would alight with their omegas if it hadn't happened earlier due to the long scent exposure.

The courting was important for many reasons, as once mated and marked, the omegas would truly be a part of the pack, and getting rid off the attachment wasn't too easy.

Getting to know each other was, of course, one of the more social aspects of courting, but the process consisted of getting used to the sudden adjustments more importantly.

They might have a completely different diet, they might struggle with health issues, mental or physical, or the alpha might have a too demanding job and would then struggle to take care of the omega in much need.

While supporting a family financially, for a good, understanding alpha, the support would come through actions more.

They have to show the omega they can take care of them, whether it be by cooking, buying them new things, cuddling and hugs, or scenting—everything was at play.

And after many tiring and stressful years, Jungkook finally had the sweet opportunity to express that he was, in fact, a good alpha. He could care for you and support any of your needs and wishes; he was able to provide.

Now that it didn't feel forced to do and came to him so naturally, he knew you would be the one for him, the most important and sweetest.

„I know Kook-ah; I want her as our 'mega too.” Namjoon answered truthfully, smiling softly at the younger alpha before he turned his eyes back to you.

„We should get the den started... It could be a sweet surprise; get it done without kitty knowing." Yoongi whispered gently, resting his back himself while he closed his eyes, his head thrown back in thought.

„I looked at more bed frames that are online; we can choose one together later. We could start decorating the room in the meantime." Hobi answered, opening one of the windows on his phone.

There was a luxury furniture website opened, with a tab called 'DEN ESSENTIALS' showing. The alpha has already filtered the search.

Apart from the regular colour and material options to choose from, there was also a way to narrow down the search for the right bed set by the number of packmembers.

After all, they would want to go back to the den just for you, but if the bed wouldn't fit everyone quite right, it wouldn't be comfortable enough to yearn for it.

The room was large enough, and the alphas have been planning on stretching out the bed from pretty much wall to wall. They might add bedside tables, though.

They didn't truly discuss the design of the room yet, but even if they didn't, they all knew your wants and needs were the most important.

While Yoongi probably wouldn't be the happiest in a room full of Hello Kitties and Cinnamonrolls, as he would sleep on a My Melody pillow, if you wanted to have a den bright and pastel themed, he would never complain.

After all, as long as you would build a nest for them, which, considering how much more and more sleepy and cuddly you were getting with them over the days, shouldn't take too long, they would gladly rest at any place of the planet.

It was an old saying that any alpha will sleep anywhere under the sun, as long as they have their omega with them, and there was for sure a bit of truth in it.

„I asked pup about what type of bedframe she liked the best the last time we went to the store; she prefers the wooden forms.”

„Yeah, those are much more classy; they are more traditional too.”The eldest alpha answered, nodding gently.

He remembered one of his classmates from when he went to school. The student was considered fairly cool and popular, for he had already established himself a pack back then, even though he was still very young and, quite frankly, immature.

The frat boy had two omegas with him, and Jin always felt slightly bad for them, noticing the way his classmate would oftentimes treat them. The disrespect was unimaginable.

But still, since their scents aligned so well, the four mates pack, consisting of one more beta, had formed while they were all still fairly young, the beta being the oldest, 20.

And after the information went around the school, considering the students were still around 18 years old at the oldest, it was a thing that made the boy quite literally famous.

Jin never spoke to him too much; his scent fell sour on his nose, and since they were both alphas and Seokjin was very pretty, putting him in an equally popular spot, the classmate never really approached him, the two alphas choosing to never interact.

He did hear him talk to a few of the 'friends' he gathered around himself, laughing loudly about how they broke the bedframe last night since it was only metal and didn't hold up during his oh so strong rut.

Jin felt slightly sick to his stomach, worried about the two, probably frightened omegas, but even when he tried to erase the image of that alpha in rut from his mind, he never truly managed, a nasty memory.

„Should we paint the room too? It's just white now.” Taehyung asked, thinking about the interior. He was a great fashionista, but room decor wasn't really where he felt his strongest.

„Maybe dark grey? I think it would be best if we kept the place dark and cosy; it should help princess sleep better, especially if she will be napping." The alpha said softly, thinking himself.

„Yea, I agree. I think our best bet is to make it easy to sleep in. It's a den after all; we can worry about details later. As long as little pup likes it, it's all good.” The packalpha murmured, patting your head gently.

The packmates rested back for a few more minutes, until Jin got a call. Since his phone was on silent mode, the ringtone didn't sound, and so, you were kept in your sweet dreamland, while the eldest got told about Sejin already waiting in the meeting room.

He ended the call soon, sighing out, while he started to pack up the empty food boxes—they seriously ate like hyenas sometimes.

While helping around, the rest of the alphas sorted through everything quickly, going from the room to the hall to sort everything in the right bin, making sure to recycle.

„Baby? Sweetheart, my little pup, wake up now. Alphas have to go see Sejin-Hyung. Come on now, sweet baby." Gently coaxing you from sleep, you fluttered your eyes open, Namjoon's dimples showing.

Going to rub your eye, Jimin interweaved your fingers with his instead, gently rubbing his thumb over your knuckles in a sweet gesture.

Yawning softly, you were still tired, but let yourself be pulled up again. The packalpha slowly placed you on the ground, making sure you weren't so tired you wouldn't stay steady.

Smiling widely at your sleepy state, Jimin ran his fingers through your hair, letting Yoongi come by and take your other palm in his. The older alpha tutted at how messy your hair was, combing it down so it sat neat and pretty.

„There, kitty, hold alpha's hand now, okay? Let's go, little kitten." Gently pecking your temple, Yoongi pulled you behind himself, Jimin walking next to you.

With the other pack members all coming with you, the pack soon piled back to the meeting room they went to this morning. This time, there were much fewer people involved—only the same man and other one.

Smiling gently at you all, Yoongi softly pulled you along, letting you sit down before he and Jimin both took a seat on each side of you.

The room had a strong light on, and with how sleepy and tired you still felt, you just wanted to go back to the soft, warm place Namjoon had tucked you away to, and go rest some more.

„I prepared the documents for you guys. Read them through and sign them.” Sejin said smoothly, handing Hoseok, the one sitting at the corner, a stack of stapled papers.

Each taking one and passing the tower of files along, all of the alphas started reading through it, though Namjoon looked up at his manager first.

„Hyung, would it be possible to take Y/N with us to The Soop?” Sejin looked over, his expression unreadable, for a few seconds.

Resting fully in his chair, the manager sighed out in thought, thinking about everything.

„I mean... As long as everyone is okay with Y/N being on camera, I suppose it would be okay. There should be enough room for everyone still.” No one spoke right away, the packmembers turning to you.

You looked up to Yoongi, the alpha's hand taking in yours, not worried about the situation they were in. You nodded a little bit; it couldn't be that bad, right?

„It's ok-okay, if you stay with me, oppas." You whispered softly, Jimin smiling widely, happy to hear your gentle confession. His heart did a little flip, the alpha realising that you found comfort in him.

„Well, in such a case, you would have to reveal that you have started the courting process before we air the series.” The other manager, whom the packmates obviously knew well but had never introduced, said softly, eyes lingering on your timid form for a little bit.

The man realised that bringing you to the industry quite suddenly could be a bit of an issue, but considering how well the packmembers were to you, he also realised that you were doing exceptionally well.

„It will be aired at the end of June, and we are leaving to record by the start of May, so before then. Sejin said, sighing gently. He could imagine you being mated to them by then, but nothing could be certain.

And if you were revealed as only courted at the moment, some bad stuff could go down, and he didn't want that to happen to any of you.

„That's o-okay...” You said it softly, squeezing both of the alphas hands gently. The pack members smiled at your answer, proud that you would take a step forward like that.

„Alright. I will get the file ready for you too, then, okay? You can sign it later, don't worry.” You nodded happily, realising that you wouldn't be there to truly shoot a show yourself, instead tagging along as a companion.

Namjoon knew that Sejin wouldn't let much of the cameras linger on you, and your face might be censored the whole time too, but that didn't matter.

The fans they had would understand and want what makes them happy to happen, and since it was you, the true ARMYs would be more than happy for them.

Deciding to go into it with such a mindset calmed the packalpha down. Sure, he felt a slight worry at the thought of your reaction to receiving a negative response to being courted by them.

It wouldn't be because of who you truly were if that happened, though; it would be something that would happen because you were courted by them, not anyone else.

The alpha felt a pang of guild strike him straight through his heart, but considering how excited you were about the whole In The Soop series, he couldn't linger on it for too long.

You were a sweet little thing, and they would keep you protected, making sure you wouldn't feel bad for any of the unreasonable hate you could possibly receive.

The alphas were ready to tuck you away from the world into their arms and wouldn't let any harm come your way.

Smiling softly, the packalpha opened the file, starting to read through it.

⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ *

Next:

[blog-name-idk]

Idiot

Pairing: Namjoon x GN!Reader

Genre: Fluff, Humor, Drabble

Summary: You have become what you most feared: a simp.

Word Count: 254

Rating: None

~~~~~

You're an idiot.

That's the only explanation for the cute, tiny crab in the palm of your hand that's staring back at you with its nine-millimeter safety eyes.

Because you definitely didn't just randomly look up a crochet pattern and then make this little critter in a fugue state while muttering to yourself that this can't be happening.

And if you did, it definitely can't be because you maybe-sort-of-absolutely like someone who was just supposed to be a transient relationship enough to make this because it's his favorite animal.

…

Fuck. You hate yourself for this.

~~~~~

"This is AMAZING!" Namjoon gushes, cooing over the baby crab you had been agonizing over for the better part of the last two days. Your eyes are riveted to the sparkle in his own, the wide grin overtaking his full lips, the dimples you stupidly can't get enough of. "Where did you find it?"

Inwardly, you feel yourself dying. But you can't find it in yourself to lie, not when those little divots are attacking you with the full force of his smile.

"I... I made it," you mumble, feeling your hand suddenly begin to sweat. Fuck, this is humiliating.

"You made this?"

His eyes, if anything, become even wider. Before you know it, his arms are around you and he's kissing your face, your cheeks, your lips.

"You're incredible," he says in wondering tones, making your chest expand and melt into a disgusting puddle of warmth and affection.

Suddenly you feel the urge to make a hundred more.

[seokjinsonlyone]

what y’all think is namjoon most endearing quality??? my cuteness aggression is triggered whenever i see him go to the beach and look for crabs

[whyse7vn]

SEVEN -

[ ot7 x reader ]

sevendaysafreak

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

tae: we are watching jungkook slowly become alpha

namjoon: can you be normal today

jk: do you really mean that bro…

tae: with all my heart..

oh my god i’m tearing up

this is what being a real man is about

jimin: begging for pussy??

jk: I DID NOT BEG??

hobi: you harassed that poor woman for a whole week

yoongi: all for a hand hold

y/n: crazy!

tae: okay??

but it was literally real as fuck so does it matter??

jimin: it was real fucking sad

jin: personally if i was her i would of called the police like sexual harassment hello???

yoongi: right

namjoon: it was a great song jungkook

jk: > //// <

i’m blushing

that was me blushing

and i giggled a little

smiling rn

hehehehehe

namjoon: a thank you would of done it

jk: thank u >.<

jimin: she should of punched him

jin: was there need for an explicit version like??

we got the point the first time

i didn’t need to hear how horny you were for a second time

hobi: he just wanted to swear

tae: no he’s just real as fuck you wouldn’t get it

jk: real as fuck

yoongi: ig it was real as fuck for jungkook

he begs for pussy on a daily

jk: proof?

hobi: by bts

y/n: i’ll leak our dms

jk: DON’T DON’T DON’T

i’m sowyy 😣

jimin: i’m gonna punch him

hobi: fucking seven days a week doesn’t seem right

is that not how you get an std?

jk: no?

yoongi: is that not when you fuck multiple people?

y/n: you fuck multiple people jk?

jk: NO?????

jimin: why is ur no a question

hobi: suspicious

jin: jungkook has crabs

tae: that’s a real man disease

y/n: that’s gross

jk: i’m real

jimin: real itchy

namjoon: can we not talk about stds pls

y/n: i bet jay park has a couple of those

jk: ???

jimin: REALLLL

jin: that’s why him and jk are friends bonded over the burn

jk: i’m not his friend anymore

y/n: character development okay!!!

yoongi: was that bcs he stole from you?

jk: stop talking to me rn

jimin: OMG GUYS

yk i had the worst dream ever yesterday tae was in it

tae: and?

jimin: wdym and

tae: i hope you die

namjoon: pls don’t wish death upon people tae

jimin: yeah tae

tae: all of you can fucking die idc!!!

not jungkook tho he real as fuck

y/n: say real as fuck one more time and i’ll snap ur neck

jin: hot asf

yoongi: ew?

tae: nobody wants to see us winning jk it’s sad 😞

jk: i’m sobbing 💔💔😞😞💔💔

tae: they literally told us to kill ourselves

namjoon: literally no one said that

jimin: in fact YOU said you hope i die

jk: he could of meant by natural causes

tae: right i would never tell you to kill ur self that’s sick and evil

yoongi: kys

tae: ur not going to heaven

yoongi: aw man 🙁

hobi: what if we put tae in the electric chair

jin: what if we put tae and jungkook in the electric chair

jk: wtf ☹️

tae: i could easily survive the electric chair it would feel good to me actually

y/n: i’ve been telling you guys for years we need to lock them up

do you actually read the bullshit they say on a daily it’s actually insane they need help

like professional help

jk: i didn’t even say anything

jimin: you don’t need to

we just know

namjoon: i agree

we could send them to a camp

or something

tae: why are you talking about us like we’re not RIGHT here

jungkook get them omg

jk: i can’t go to camp

too much raw air exposure is bad for my skin

and i have a dentist appointment soon

yoongi: raw air?

jin: how soon is ur appointment?

jk: so soon that i can’t go to camp

tae: JUNGKOOK STAND UR GROUND

WE WILL NOT BE PUSHED AROUND

REPEAT AFTER ME

WE WILL NOT BE PUSHED AROUND

namjoon: tae shut up

y/n: right

tae: i liked it better when you guys just ignored me in this gc

now all you do is be mean

jimin: maybe u deserve it

*you definitely deserve it

hobi: stop talking then idk

yoongi: i will gladly ignore you again

jk: i love you tae i’ll listen to you talk

jin: jungkook the biggest dick rider ever

tae: he’s my little dick rider 🥰😍❤️

hobi: yeah definitely stop talking

namjoon: okay!

y/n: oh my god

jimin: ???

yoongi: um

jin: this is what seven was really about

jk: bro..

tae: lol

jimin: you're really gorgeous i would deadass fight 3 mountain lions in a mcdonald's handicap bathroom stall with my hands tied behind my back and my only weapon is a shake weight glued to my forehead just to get a chance to get to know you and take u out tbh

jin: nurse he’s out again

jimin: wrong chat lol

tae: and you wanna put ME in the electric chair

ur all out of ur minds

namjoon: you were gonna send that to someone????

jimin: is it bad?

y/n: so unbelievably bad

jk: blushing

yoongi: wow

tae: yikes

hobi: bts never beating the rizzless allegations

y/n: who were you gonna send that too?

jk: was it me?

yoongi: that was flirting?

jin: probably the notes app

jimin: no one

jin: told you

notes app.

jk: it wasn’t me?

tae: i’ll be nice and give you some better lines jimin dw

jimin: the only lines you have are of coke

tae: nvm fuck you stay bitchless

namjoon: leave jimin alone

jimin: right leave me alone

namjoon: he’ll open up in his own time

jimin: i fucking won’t

you guys deserve to know NOTHING about me

yoongi: okay don’t care kys

jimin: i have a crush

jin: i’m hungry

hobi: is this the same crush you talked about like 4 weeks ago??

jk: on me?

sorry jimin i’m already in love with someone else

yoongi: didn’t ask

jk: i won’t tell you who it is it’s a secret

namjoon: a secret from who??

jk: what does that mean…

namjoon: don’t we all know…

jin: i SAID i’m hungry

jimin: all you do is eat like omg??

get a job or something??????

jin: i have a job

i serve face for a living i would suggest you look into it since you have so much free time to BULLY and HARASS others but with a face like urs idk if you’ll make the cut

y/n: wow

jimin: i’m not reading all that 💀

y/n: never use that emoji again ew

jimin: 💀💀💀💀💀

y/n: this is why whoever ur trying to rizz up probably thinks ur a loser

yoongi: is it taemin again?

tae: ew you run back to taemin every 4 months it’s kinda embarrassing

jimin: taehyung you actually need to shut ur mouth

breathing the same air as you is embarrassing

and at least i have someone to run back to you are actually genuinely bitchless

tae: u are taemin’s bitch

so technically ur as bitchless

yoongi: gay

jk: don’t be a homocrome

namjoon: stop talking

jimin: it’s not even taemin so shut the hell up

i’m not talking about this anymore

moving on

hobi: what is your mbti guys

jk: physical touch

namjoon: that wasn’t the question

y/n: just say ur horny and go omg

jin: don’t

seven was actually enough

i will hear NO more about jungkooks sex life

everything i have learnt has been without my consent

my lawyers will be in touch

jk: my lawyers are ur lawyers

jin: not anymore

jk: omg…

hobi: oh my oh my god

namjoon: jin stop facetiming me i’m not answering

jin: pls joon pleaseeeeeeeeeeeee

namjoon: i’m not sitting there for you to look at urself in the camera for an hour

i have things to do

jimin: that sounds like very jobless behaviour to me tbh

jin: you can’t be ugly and jealous pls pick a struggle

tae: and rizzless

hobi: i know ur not talking…

tae: ????

hobi: tae i need you to do some self reflection

tae: okay?

i’m hot as fuck

cool as fuck

and real as fuck

i feel well reflected ty for suggesting that hoseok

y/n: i told you i’m gonna snap ur neck if you said that again

start running

jin: coming to watch 🥰

[setsuuestsu]

Sicktember Day #3: Campus/Con Crud

Sickie: Namjoon

Caretaker: Jimin

Word Count: 243

“Joon hyung,” Jimin chastises. “I told you that the crab festival was a bad idea.”

Namjoon sniffles, both from the nasty cold he’s caught from said festival and from the false advertising of the festival. He had assumed it was a festival where all crab lovers would get together and raise funds for the protection of the crabs, not that it was a festival where all crab lovers would get together and eat crab.

“It was totally worth it.” he lamely insists, reaching past Jimin for the tissue box left on the coffee table. He blows his nose, frowning at how unhelpful it was, then slumps back onto the couch.

Thankfully, Jimin takes pity on him and wraps him in a throw blanket hanging off the back of the couch. It smells like Downy and cotton, and he can easily identify it as Jungkook’s. 

He leans into his elbow and lets out a coughing fit. 

“Jimin-ah,” he complains. “I can’t lay here any longer. I have schoolwork I could be doing.”

Jimin stares at him, unimpressed. “You’re not going to exercise that brain at all. Your

going to rest and recover, not … not … AGHHH! I can’t think of the word!”

Namjoon snorts, but it turns into a deep cough and then a sneeze or two. Maybe he shouldn’t have gone to that festival. Too many germs.

“Let me go get you some medicine.” Jimin insists. “You’re due for another dose soon.”