#counselor san | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

svintsnghostsrecs · 2 years ago

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my heart. 🥹 i love me some sannie angst but this one, it soothed my morning today. 😭 i am in hysterics and sobbing, omg 🥹

cruel summer | choi san

pairing: choi san x fem!reader, yungi

genre: friends to lovers au; summer camp au; college au

synopsis: choi san has been a counselor for the “summer academy” summer camp for as long as you have. this is your last year at camp and you feel like you can’t hide your feelings for him any longer. what will happen when summer ends?

warnings: fluff, d r a m a, angsty at times, suggestive & smutty, like two swear words

word count: 7k

author’s note: this was supposed to come out in time for san’s birthday but unfortunately exams and my writer’s block teamed up to delay this. so, happy belated birthday to our san and i hope you enjoy! (this was is also my first attempt ever at smut pls don’t be too harsh in your judgement thanxx)

playlist: cruel summer - taylor swift, liability - lorde, our last summer - abba

masterlist | navi

It was quiet in your room, the only sound the one of you furiously rummaging through drawers and pacing around hurriedly. The air was becoming a little stuffy, making your shirt stick a little due to perspiration and feel hot all over.

“Will you pack faster?!”

The booming voice coming from down the hall set all of your nerve endings on fire, only adding fuel to the burning frustration you were feeling. You inhaled deeply, willing yourself to calm down.

“Do you want me to smack you with my suitcase?!” you yelled back through the open door of your room.

Song Mingi could be a pain in the ass when he wanted to, just like right now, but you loved him nonetheless. After all, this was your idea.

You still didn’t know what had possessed you as a freshman in college to sign up for three hot summer months of pure torture inflicted to you by rowdy teenagers, but the pay had seemed good enough. You swore it would only be for one summer, and yet here you were four years later, about to graduate college and onto your last year as summer camp counselor.

“The guys are going to be here any second, hurry the fuck up!” you barely saw him as Mingi zoomed down the hallway sat on top of his suitcase, drawing a short chuckle out of you despite the nerves.

Of course, you had dragged Mingi along and, although very much reluctant at first, you know he loved it just as much as you did.

When the doorbell rang, you knew your time had run out.

“Fuck it” you murmured as you zipped the suitcase shut, awfully certain that you were forgetting something, but definitely over trying to stuff any more clothes in.

Finally, you made your way downstairs, huffing when you realized Mingi hadn’t even bothered waiting for you and had also left you on locking up duty. With a groan, you checked that lights and the like were all turned off, and then locked the door.

“Finally!” a groan escaped your best friend, waiting along with his boyfriend Yunho and his roommate for you. “It’s not like she took an hour” Yunho scolded him with a playful eyeroll. You sent a grateful look his way, struggling down the last steps of your apartment complex.

Wooyoung made his way over, taking your suitcase with a “let me help you with that” and somehow stuffing it in the trunk with the other three.

Yunho was quick to get into the car after several other complaints from Mingi, “I’m not hearing Hongjoong and Seonghwa’s bitching for a fourth consecutive year” he mumbled as he got in and put his seatbelt on. Everyone laughed, prompting Yunho to start the car.

You four had a reputation for getting to the camp late every year – started when the first summer you had gotten lost, choosing to scream along to your Britney Spears playlist rather than listening to the GPS’ directions – and every year you had to put up with the two camp’s counselor’s leaders exemplary lecture in front of all the other counselors.

It had been embarrassing when the situation repeated itself the year after – due to the engine breaking down this time – and last year too (because you got up late, you’ll admit).

Mingi was taking zero chances this year, he threw you out of bed at dawn, pressed you every five minutes to see if you were done packing and called Yunho about twelve times to make sure he got out of the house early to avoid traffic.

You were exactly one minute late according to his schedule, but you doubted it counted much (he still rubbed it in your faces until you got to the camp).

Other than that, the car ride was as chaotic as every year: Yunho and Mingi striking up an old married couple style argument every chance they got, you and Wooyoung yelling songs in the back seats and reminding Yunho the directions every so often to avoid another Summer One Incident.

Everything was fine and dandy, you got to the camp in time and half the other counselors, Hongjoong and Seonghwa included, clapped and whooped as your car approached.

Then, just as you set the last t-shirt down in the closet of the bungalow you and Mingi shared, he materialized at the door.

“Hi, sweetheart”

Choi San was leaning against the frame of the door, dashing as ever in his bright yellow “Summer Academy” summer camp t-shirt and sporting his signature dimpled smile. This year, his hair was blond and longer than what you remembered.

You smiled too, hoping he hadn’t caught you staring, and felt his arms welcoming you in a big hug in a matter of seconds.

“I missed you” he murmured in the crook of your neck, his breath tingling just a little. You sighed.

“Me too” he let out a deep chuckle at your response, instantly lighting your heart up.

This was going to be a long summer – again.

When you first met him, you spent a grand total of four hours dealing with eleven-year-olds and their explosive science projects. By the end of the workshop, you were covered in several layers of baking soda, red food coloring, dish soap and vinegar. He had gotten out almost unscathed, just a few soda stains on his shirt.

You remembered feeling embarrassed, all the more so when he flashed you those kind and amused eyes. Unlike you first thought though, he didn’t make fun of you, but just laughed good-naturedly and helped you get baking soda out of your hair.

Since that moment, you were assigned the science workshop every week for the rest of summer, and, since “you guys work so well together!”, Hongjoong insisted, any other activity that included hyper-active pre-teens was assigned to you.

Hongjoong was right though, you and San did work well together. You just fit with one another.

So much so that it had you wonder, more than you liked to admit, if you were friends, good friends or something more. It had you lose sleep at night, especially in the three months you were here, questioning if you two could work in the real world.

Questioning if your mind was running wild or if he, too, could feel the spark every time your hands brushed, or could feel your heart miss a beat whenever he pulled you closer. If he noticed your red cheeks when his gaze would linger a moment too long. If he too lost time imagining you outside days made of papier-mache volcanos and swimming contests in the lake.

“I swear to god it wasn’t on purpose!” San was running away from you with all his might, trying to escape your fury. He had taken the initiative to organize today’s activity for your group without you and landed on water fights.

No doubt it was game over for him when you got to the meeting point, seeing a smirking San with and equally smug Wooyoung by his side. Your perplexed face must’ve spoken for you, because a hesitant Mingi made his way over to explain.

“They thought of getting your group together with ours to organize a water fight tournament…” he explained quickly, instantly making you turn your head to San.

The young man just shrugged, handing over a water gun, giving you and Mingi barely enough time to start running before Wooyoung whistled to start the games.

“You’re so done, Choi San!” you had chased him all the way down to the little pier and held him captive between your water gun and the lake. “I said I didn’t mean to” he laughed, trying to keep a straight face.

“Next time ask me if I feel like getting soaked at nine in the morning, then” ever so serious, you stepped closer, spraying him in the face before pushing him in the water. Too bad he held onto your hand and dragged you with him.

When you both came up for air, you found your faces to be mere inches away, breathing the same air. Quickly, his hand made its way around your waist, pulling you closer. The simple touch sent sparks up your spine.

“Sorry” he winked, so close, making you wish you could just kiss that smirk away. But then, much like now-

“Y/N!” Mingi halted in his steps, noticing the predicament at hand. Then he smirked. “Sorry to interrupt your catch-up time, lovebirds, but Seonghwa wants us in the main cabin for the meeting” San let go of you, not looking bothered in the least by Mingi’s comment – unlike you.

“Everyone’s almost there!” your best friend hollered as he jogged down the steps and to the path.

San just chuckled at his antics, drawing a smile from you as he let you out the door first. “We’d better hurry” he mumbled, walking down the steps after you. “We don’t want mama Hwa to get mad, do we?” you answered.

And you thanked your lucky stars he was too busy laughing to notice the look you gave him.

This was going to be a long summer indeed.

Week Two

“It’s not the same without you” you jumped on the spot, almost messing up the little sun you were drawing on the cardboard.

“What isn’t?” you recognized San’s voice before you even saw him and turned around to greet him with a small pout, indicator that you were a little upset he almost made you ruin the sign you were making.

“Science club!” he huffed, sitting down next to you, and immediately picking up a paint brush. You stared a little, observing how he started helping out without you needing to ask. “This year, I swear to god, it’s like the kids are high on sugar. I can’t keep them focused on their projects and Yeosang is no help at all” he sighed, seemingly happy with how his side of the sign turned out, then looked at you.

“I need you”

Without a care in the world, and a cute little pout on his lips, he nearly sent you into cardiac arrest with those three words. Although your heart was about to burst from your chest, and you felt yourself growing impossibly hot in the cheeks, you shrugged it off.

“I’m sure Yeosang isn’t that bad” you murmured, a tight smile on your lips as you resumed your painting.

“He’s straight up terrified of them!” he broke out in giggles, explaining today’s mishap, which included Yeosang being chased by a twelve-year-old holding a can of worms and a lot of yelling. You laughed along with him, lost in his recounting of the events.

Truth was, you’d asked Hongjoong to keep you off the science club with San for a while. You couldn’t risk having pre-teens giggling like idiots and whispering about you and him like all the other summers. Sure, it was kind of cute having them ask if San was a good boyfriend, or if he was a great kisser, even saying that you two were adorable together, but by the end of summer you were completely and utterly torn apart by the questions.

Stupid? Possibly, but very much painful.

Especially because there was no way he hadn’t noticed how much it affected you when he leaned into it. When he made no effort to make them believe otherwise, like you did. When he called you love just to shoot you a wink right after and subtly pointing to wide-eyed, shocked girls. What he didn’t know, was how you felt like your heart had been chewed and spit right out every single time.

You needed a little to ease into it rather than launching yourself headfirst. You’d take your time and try to protect your hopeless heart.

“I’m sure Yeosang will get used to their antics” you shrugged once he finished his recounting.

“Well, I miss you and I don’t care if I have to beg Hongjoong, I want you back”

“San, it’s only been, like… what? Two weeks?” you rolled your eyes, used to by now to not read too much into his words and his dramatics.

“Two weeks and three days” he pointed out crossing his arms, barely missing his face with the blue paint-stained brush. “I can’t do it without you, Yeosang is completely useless-”

“Y/N!” you were saved by Lila – a lovey twelve-year-old who had been coming to the summer camp ever since you’d started working there – rushing towards you and San. She stopped in front of you two, breathless, making you share a confused look.

“Lila, are you okay? Did something happen?” you asked, a little worried.

“You two broke up!” she sounded completely outraged, shocked and heartbroken as she pointed her finger between you and San, making your eyes grow wider than a baseball.

Apparently, what you didn’t take into account when creating your master plan, was the rumors of the complete opposite scenario spreading.

Her words left you effectively speechless, fortunately for you though, San seemed to have the situation under control – as always.

“Who said that, sweetie?” he asked, seeming genuinely concerned about the issue. Lila then proceeded to launch herself in a recount of all the signs the whole camp, it seemed, picked up over the last two weeks and a half. Namely your absence from the science club. You rolled your eyes again when San turned towards you with a smug grin.

“Lila, could you leave us for a second?” your voice sounded clipped despite your best efforts, and with one last reassuring nod from San that everything was alright, the girl went.

Not even waiting for him to stand up, you upped and marched towards the little pier overlooking the lake. You couldn’t believe it took so little for your plan, and nerves, to go up in flames.

“Did she say something?” you scoffed when you heard his voice, turning around to see him walk up to you with a little amused smile. The both of you stayed quiet, you wanted to say so much, but had no idea how to, and San seemed to be lost in thought. When he sat down, you let your head rest against his shoulder.

“I’ll talk to Hongjoong about the science club” you muttered defeatedly, not really believing the words leaving your mouth. It appeared you were doomed either way.

San just nodded, leaning his head on top of yours.

Later that evening, you talked to Hongjoong – who seemed overjoyed to put you back on the workshop – and gave Mingi the first melodramatic, San-centric speech of the summer.

In your little shared bungalow, he laid sprawled out on his bed, watching you pace around the room and flaunting your arms about while complaining over the same things he’d been hearing for three summers now.

Only the noise of the cicadas coming in from the window, along with a cool evening breeze, accompanied your spiel. Mingi, though, listened intently as always.

“Y/N, you have to rip the band aid off” he finally said, watching as you flopped down on your bed. “Just tell him, you’ll probably never see him again after this summer” “Yeah…” the thought did little to console you, the idea of him becoming a stranger didn’t sit well with you. It was even worse to think about confessing and being rejected, thus ruining your whole summer. So, convincing yourself that you’d wait until the end of camp to break your own heart, you finally settled into bed, wishing Mingi a good night.

The Water Park Trip

“Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you”

“Seriously, it’s no big deal” you repeated for what felt like the millionth time.

Yeosang wouldn’t leave you alone after finding out he was no longer on science club duty and was currently following you around the cafeteria. You’d never seen him smile this big at six thirty in the morning. You’d probably never see it again.

Despite assuring him multiple times that it was okay, you didn’t miss Mingi’s glance once he sat down at the counselors’ table. You already knew what he was going to say once he’d get the chance to speak to you alone. Finally, just when San made his was into the cafeteria, you met Yunho’s sympathetic eyes. You smiled curtly; not sure you were happy to be subject of sympathy so early on in the summer.

It seemed that almost everyone knew, or noticed at least, how San stringing you along for three months a year was slowly affecting you more and more every time. You tried not to show it, but it was hard when with just a glance he seemed to undo all the work you put into moving on, discarding this as merely a summer flirt.

Every August, you told yourself you’d get over it and then, every June, you found yourself back at square one.

“Petition to cancel water park trips, breathe to sign up” Wooyoung, barely awake, plopped down in his seat next to you, eliciting a giggle for you.

“Maybe if you didn’t go to bed so late last night…” San teased, sitting down in front of him. Wooyoung just flipped him off while gulping down an entire cup of coffee. “No slander at six thirty in the morning, thank you”

Everyone amusedly smiled at the interaction, and you heard Yeosang mumbling something along the lines of “you just woke up an hour earlier than usual” with a roll of his eyes, which of course was not well received by the accused.

“Everyone, listen up a second please!” Hongjoong stood up from his seat, listing off today’s counselor duties before the wake-up call for the campers – which didn’t differ much from the usual morning routine – and then proceeding to remind everyone of the approaching midsummer celebrations.

You let his words wash over you, no doubt you could ask Mingi about the specifics later and focused instead on strengthening your will in order to spend an entire day with San – again.

Usually, counselors were paired up during out of camp trips to do rounds and check up on their assigned group. It was just your luck that San had signed you up to be his partner.

The bus was a little stuffy and seriously noisy. You and San, along with Wooyoung and Yeosang, were assigned the younger campers today, which altogether entailed loud yelling to keep everyone in check and being even louder than them to catch their attention.

Yeosang quickly did roll call, and with no one missing, the drive to the water park started. Unfortunately for you, and every other adult present, the kids were requesting songs left and right. Even worse, San had conceded to play Kidz Bop to satisfy all requests.

“Do you think you could drive any faster?” Wooyoung pleaded the driver for what felt like the millionth time. “No can do, son” came the answer, again. Your friend unceremoniously crashed down on his seat, groaning, and sending a death glare to San. You feared he was going to bite off someone’s head sooner rather than later.

Only when you got to the water park the mood improved, although Wooyoung still looked like he’d been through hell and back – in a sense, the four of you had.

San casually slid his hand into yours, intently listening to Seonghwa and Hongjoong reminding everyone to be careful, where to find counselors and to never wander off alone, and to “remember that every group has assigned counselors that will be attached to your hips, so don’t even think about doing anything stupid!”

With one last glare to everyone present, Hongjoong let everybody go and the groups broke off with the counselors. Kids were begging you left and right to start from at least ten different slides and attractions, worsening the mild headache that two hours of Kidz Bop had started.

Lucky for you, Wooyoung wasn’t having any of it.

“Alright, listen up!” his voice held a frustrated edge to it that shut everyone right up. “Line up, tell Yeosang one by one, without yelling, which slides you want to do and then we can start the day” the small crowd of eight- to eleven-year-olds looked a little scared and complied immediately.

You and San snickered quietly as you watched the kids line up in front of Yeosang, who quickly whipped out his phone and started writing. Sharing a look, you knew today would run smoothly thanks to Wooyoung’s snappiness.

It was just a little over two hours after lunch and it had been difficult to manage impetuous eight-year-olds; even more so when San spent all morning teasing you left and right, sneaking little touches here and there. He set your skin aflame with every single one of them, and you couldn’t take it anymore.

“Yeosang, let me go with you” immediately, when the group asked to be split up so they could do different slides, you jumped at the opportunity to spend at least the afternoon away from San.

You collected the kids who wanted to do water slides, feeling San’s gaze burn a hole in your head as you walked away with Yeosang. The more you walked, the lighter you felt.

“Dude!” Wooyoung exclaimed, nudging San. “Could you be any more obvious?” thankfully for him, you were already out of earshot. San glared at his friend; a silent threat that suggested him being drowned in the kid’s pool. “Apparently not…” he murmured once his friend was already marching to the wave pool with half the group.

San watched until you disappeared from his line of sight, sighing as he hurried behind the last kid.

“If he kills me today, I’m blaming you” you were monitoring kids in the pool – which ones were going up to do slides and if they came down – when Yeosang spoke, making you whip your head towards him.

“What? Who?” he raised a brow at your comment, barely believing that he had to spell it out for you. “San” he deadpanned and gave you a look that scoured every corner of your soul. You shuddered, looking back at the pool.

“Why?” you shrugged.

“He likes you, dumbass” he nudged your shoulder with his. “Surely, you know”

You tsked, ready to launch yourself into another detailed recount of how you strongly believed San couldn’t like you back: he made zero moves in the span of three summers to indicate so, although you texted pretty often you ever rarely saw each other outside of camp, he just couldn’t-

“You’re so blind” Yeosang scoffed again, not letting you carry on your nonsense speech. “Have you ever done one of those things?” the question was left hanging in the hot summer air, echoing in your head unanswered for the rest of the day.

It stayed so, and puzzled you even further, when you reunited with the other two counselors at the meeting spot. Now more than ever, San’s presence confused you; even when he threw you in the pool just before leaving the water park, and everything seemed normal.

“Choi San, I’m going to fucking kill you!”

“It’s payback for last year, remember?” he grinned from his spot on the edge of the pool. And how could you forget the way he’d pulled you closer in the water, making you shiver all over, so close you almost kissed him?

On the ride back to camp, he never let go of your hand, urging you to sit beside him again. With your head on his shoulder and his thumb drawing shapes on the back of your hand, you hoped you could come back from all this at the end of summer.

The gentle motion on your skin and exhausted conversation in the back, lulled you to sleep.

San, unbeknownst to you, watched you carefully for the rest of the ride with such tenderness in his eyes, shushing everyone who talked too loudly, and earning goofy grins from Wooyoung and Yeosang each time.

He insisted on taking you back to your bungalow without waking you up and couldn’t help himself when he pressed a gentle kiss on your forehead after laying you down in bed. San lingered a second longer before walking back to his bungalow with a storm raging in his heart.

That evening, when Mingi woke you up just before dinner, you sat up in your bed confused as to how you got there.

“San carried you here when we got back” your best friend said, recognizing the puzzled look on your face. He gave you a little smile, saying he’d wait for you outside before walking to the dining hall.

When you got there, as if your eyes had a mind of their own, searched for San. The moment you found him in the crowd, he was already looking at you, and shot you a dimpled smile.

Willing your heart to calm down, you smiled back before choosing to sit as far away from him as possible. With just one look, Mingi followed you and gestured Yunho to come over.

If you wanted to make it to the end of summer, you needed to stay away from Choi San.

Midsummer

“Dance with me?” his hand entered your line of sight in the warm light of the fire.

It was midsummer, and with the help of the campers you organized an all-day celebration. It had been tiring, but gratifying. Now, you sat alone on a log of wood in front of the fireplace, drowning in San’s hoodie – which he insisted you wear when he saw you shivering two hours ago – and listening to the song faintly playing in the background as you watched kids awkwardly slow dance or chat.

You could never deny the softness in his eyes, so you stood up nodding and holding his hand. You didn’t care anymore about the sighs and giggles going around when he spun you and landed his arms on your waist.

“Are you okay?” he asked after a while, his eyes never allowing yours to escape their hold. Simply nodding, you hoped he would drop the subject. You didn’t think you could lie to him while he was looking at you like that.

San’s eyes were intently set on yours still, sending shivers running all throughout your body, scaring you into believing he could learn all of your deepest secrets in a matter of seconds. Yet, they were so warm and inviting, you couldn’t look away.

“You know you can talk to me, right?” he asked, swaying you gently. “Whatever it is”

“I don’t think I can” his gaze was so intense that when you spoke, your voice trembled a little. A gust of wind blew by, sending a strand of your hair flying into your eyes. San softly brought it back to your ear, his fingers leaving goosebumps in their wake.

His hand lingered for a second too long on your cheek, and a moment later it was gone, back on your waist.

Still dizzy, you barely caught the look flashing in his eyes.

“Is something bothering you? Don’t shut me out, please” all you resolution almost crumbled at the sad, pleading tilt in his voice. At last, you couldn’t bear to look at him in the eyes anymore and hid your face in his chest.

All you could hear was the gentle beating of his heart, surrounded by his scent and engulfed in his arms. The way he rested his chin on top of your head, broke your heart a little.

If you only knew.

“Don’t worry about it” you murmured in his chest, feeling his arms hold you closer. Thankfully, he spared you of any other questions for the rest of the night. He even kept quiet when he walked you back to your bungalow.

But San couldn’t resist placing a feathery kiss on your cheek before leaving you for the night.

The way your heart hurt that night, as you helplessly tossed in bed, was a new kind of ache you were yet to experience. In pain for something that wasn’t even there, a longing for something within your reach but that you couldn’t quite grasp.

And if San had noticed your misty eyes with every twirl he made you do that night, he’d been kind enough not to mention. But he’d never know about the silent tears you shed into your pillow.

After that night, you only spent time with him if necessary; you avoided him out of workshops, was in his presence only if someone else was there, and basically attached yourself to Mingi’s hip – unfortunately, becoming an almost ever present third wheel.

The End of Summer

“Y/N, I don’t think you can go on like this” Yunho voiced a thought that had been marinating in his head for quite a while now.

The three of you had been preparing the activities for the last day of camp all morning, and Mingi and Yunho had been sneakily dancing around the subject for a few hours now.

“I don’t think it’s healthy for either of you” he continued, mapping out the treasure hunt. You head shot up, looking at him with wide eyes. “Both of you look like your cats died, you have for weeks now”

It was quiet for a moment, Mingi looked like he wanted to stand up for you but held his tongue. Yunho had a point. You didn’t care about anything anymore; you didn’t know how to behave in San’s presence.

Truth was, you needed a breather, even if it made you miserable – more than usual, that is. And you were also sick and tired of feeling like that. For fuck’s sake, it was just a crush, so why oh why did it have to have such an impact on you?

You groaned, letting your head bang against the table and stay there. You weren’t ignorant to how the wall you built between the two of you affected you just as much as it did San, but at one point it got too much. Being in his vicinity exasperated you and had your nerves on edge.

Just when you raised your head, ready to explain yourself, San barged in as if on cue. You exchanged a wide-eyed look with Mingi and Yunho, begging them with your eyes not to leave the room.

“I need to talk to Y/N” his voice sounded serious; he still hadn’t looked at you. “Alone” he took a step into the cabin, immediately your best friend and his boyfriend got up. As they walked by you, they murmured quiet sorrys with apologetic eyes.

It was only you two now, closed in the small cabin after weeks of only sharing two hours a day in each other’s company at science club.

You stayed put in your place, avoiding his gaze, the air thick with tension. San walked around the table, leaning on it, and stood beside you.

“Why are you avoiding me?” his voice allowed no room for contradiction, he knew you had been escaping his presence with all your might. Still, you answered “I’m not” earning an incredulous scoff.

San leaned down, now at your eye level. You wanted to cower at the intensity of his gaze, so devoid of its usual warmth. Now it just looked like a storm, pulling you in.

“You have” he asserted, placing a finger under your chin, and turning your face towards him. “Why?”

You couldn’t lie to him, not when he was looking at you like that. Still, you did.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” you raised an eyebrow, feeling like your heart would beat out of your chest any second now.

It felt like a switch flipped inside of San’s brain, though he stayed quiet, observing your face with an unusual hunger in his eyes – one that made warmth pool in your stomach. This was most definitely uncharted territory in your relationship.

“Stop lying” he inched closer, making your breath hitch. “And tell me why” you swore you stopped breathing for a second when his eyes fell to your lips for just a moment, making you think of doing the unthinkable.

“No” you whispered, voice challenging, lips mere millimeters away from his.

“Fine, then” he whispered back.

You didn’t know who kissed who first, all you knew was that kissing him felt like breathing again. San was kissing you desperately, like a parched man downing a glass of water, like words failed the need he had to say what he craved to.

His lips on yours electrified you, feeling like too much and not enough at the same time. Your fingers found their home in his soft blond strands, gripping them to pull him impossibly closer. San let out a small grunt at the action, pulling you up with him, only to sit you back down on the table.

He gravitated closer to you automatically, not leaving you time to fully grasp what was going on, mind dizzy from his kisses. Slotting in between your legs gracefully, he was back on you in mere seconds.

“San…” this was a horrible idea, exactly the opposite of all that you’d been trying to do all summer, but he didn’t leave you time to speak another word. He was kissing you again, tongue tracing your lips before carefully sneaking inside your mouth.

You never thought you could need someone this much, it hurt to be away from him, and you were so overwhelmed by having him like this that you couldn’t even decide if this was going to hurt more than keeping him away.

As his lips trailed down your neck, and your fingers tangled in his hair once more, you decided that you didn’t care – not now.

When he bit your lip, you knew you were done for. San’s hand was dangerously sneaking closer and closer to where you needed him most, a whispered “please” left your mouth. And who was him to deny you like that?

“Why are you avoiding me?” with every word he left a kiss, when he cupped your heat, a breathy moan left your mouth. “I haven’t, I’m not-” you could barely speak as he made quick work of your shorts, sneaking his hand in your panties right after. “N-not avoiding you” you murmured, head lost in the clouds more and more with every flick of his fingers.

“Then I’m going to have to break you” he whispered, looking into your eyes, his words went straight to your core and elicited a moan from you.

San stayed true to his word; every touch of his set you aflame, every movement brought you higher and higher. You weren’t thinking about the consequences of all this – you weren’t thinking at all. Lost in fiery kisses and breathless whispers, tangled up together, you let him have his way.

Only when you both came down, breaths mingling together and foreheads touching, you realized the scale of what just happened. Only when you felt him slip away, your heart sunk to your stomach and an echoing chant of idiot, idiot, idiot resonated in your head.

“Y/N, please, tell me what I’ve done wrong” he felt a million miles away now, although he barely moved, and his voice sounded as frail as glass, defeated and broken. Right then, tears started to sting in your eyes; you’d done it, you’d broken your heart and his too. You’d ruined it.

“Y/N? San?” A sudden set of knocks made you both spring into action, furthering your distance, hurrying to look presentable. “Are you still in there? We have to run tomorrow’s activities by Hongjoong, and we need the papers” it was Mingi talking, giving you the perfect out.

“Yeah, I’ll bring them out!” you yelled back, gathering all your projects at the speed of light, not daring to look back at San and speeding out of there in seconds.

The door slammed shut behind you, echoing the sound of your breaking hearts.

Needless to say, you felt miserable for the remainder of the night. You didn’t even venture to dinner, Mingi had to bring you something to eat after and hear the ultimate San-centric monologue of the century – which also involved long minutes of self-loathing, tears and banging your head against the wall.

“When I said that you needed to talk about it, I didn’t mean have sex and go back to avoiding each other”

So, the words Yunho uttered to you first thing in the morning, as he set his tray down on the cable, came as no surprise to you. The last day of camp started off just right – thankfully, no one was in earshot.

“Hey, I didn’t spill the beans just for you to rub it in her face” Mingi said, shocked. “Well, you woke me up at the break of dawn to tell me, so…” Yunho bit back, taking a bite out of his muffin.

Your amusement at the interaction was short lived; he was right, and now you definitely didn’t know how to face San. After all, it was all your fault.

The day went by uneventfully, between activities you were able to distract yourself enough to forget about your aching heart. Though you felt a pang of guilt whenever you caught San walking by, especially when your eyes met. You could read it in his that he was dying to talk to you, but for now, you were glad you both were busy.

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise when, that evening at the closing bonfire, he dragged you away.

Far from the commotion, and shielded by the trees lining the lake’s coast, no excuse could hold. You felt it in the way his pleading eyes begged you to say something, anything, after he spoke.

“Is it something I did?” San was keeping his distance this time, a few steps away from you. “If I did something I need to know, because it’s been eating me alive, Y/N”

How could you tell him that this was all you? How could you make him understand that you were so hopelessly in love with him that you needed to cut this chase before it hurt you more?

“You didn’t do anything wrong, San, but I just…”

“Then what is it?” he exclaimed, throwing his hands up in defeat. “You’ve been distant all summer, I thought… I thought we-”

“We what, San?” you couldn’t help a little anger from slipping out in with your words, clearly taking him by surprise. You sighed, resisting the urge to walk away.

“Well, I don’t know, Y/N! Why don’t you tell me?” frustration was dripping from his every word. “I just don’t understand how we went from being okay to you spending all your time with everyone but me. Then yesterday happened and I thought things could finally go back to normal, but you go and you avoid me like the fucking plague!”

“I love you!” you finally exploded, barely letting him finish and throwing your hands in the air, willing your voice to hold on a little longer before inevitably cracking. “I love you, okay? And I don’t know what to do with myself anymore because every summer it only gets worse” biting back the tears and ignoring how his shocked face looked in the dim light, you continued.

“Because every year for three months I get to live in an unruled heaven, free falling until the end of August comes and it all comes crashing down before my eyes. Then, realization hits and I have to pick myself back up for the next eight months because how could I be so stupid to believe that you could ever feel for me what I do for you?” finally, a tear rolled down your face, but you made no move to dry it.

“I love you” you shrugged, a defeated smile on your face “Isn’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?”

His silence made its way to your heart, filling the cracks in it and breaking it from the inside out. The more San stood, quiet, looking for an answer to give you, the less you wanted to be in his presence.

The heartbreak and shame were starting to hit you so hard you felt like you couldn’t breathe. A foot after the other, you turned around, ready to walk away again and start mending the broken pieces of your heart – this time once and for all.

“Y/N” your name, falling from his lips, hurt. But it made you stop anyway, though you didn’t have the strength to turn around. “Look at me, please”

After just a second, the time to barely compose yourself, you did, and found him closer to you than before.

“How could you possibly think that I’m not in love with you?” your heart stopped for a second, eyes widening just the littlest bit. “I’ve been ever since I heard you laugh that day, when we almost made the science room explode while cleaning up”

San smiled, the familiar warmth of his eyes making you a breathless mess.

“I don’t think I could ever get you out of my head even if I tried and believe me I did” with another step he closed the distance between you two, one hand going to cup your face, his thumb gently caressing your skin.

“I never made a move because I was scared you were going to realize you just wanted us for the summer, and I didn’t want to lose you” you only hoped your eyes were shining with utter adoration like his were. “Not then, not now, not ever”

The gust of wind that blew past, did little to cool down the fire inside you. You feared that not even the shadows you were hiding in, just enough to barely hear the commotion of the end of summer party, were going to shield you from his gaze.

“Be mine?” he whispered, his breath softly grazing your lips.

“I always was” you muttered before kissing him like you always wanted to, like you only imagined you ever could, feeling lighter than you ever did.

#🕷️ — i want my own camp counselor san #🕷️ — i want it right now #🕷️ — 😭😭#🕷️: fave fics #🕷️: favorite fics #🕷️: comfort fics ☀️

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christinejames34 · 2 years ago

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hwaslayer · 23 days ago

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GIRL the way i fuckin LOST it reading your reblog 😂 the memes are so accurate PLEASE— esp the jongho checking up on san post-bar activities meme 💀 YOURE SOOO REAL

wildfire (cs) | fifteen.

—spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.

—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 6.6k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing/mature language, changes are happening??, namjoon again to the rescue, a bit of distant san 😔, a bit of yearning san ❤️‍🩹, alcohol consumption & intoxication, a very small kiss that was accidental and meant absolutely nothing, these two just 😞 over each other, some crying

—on rotation: next to you - bryson tiller | i'll be alright (tonight) - mura masa

Two months have passed, closer to 3, and you've been busy working your ass off in Namjoon's lab. You've brainstormed and came up with a project that Namjoon approved, giving you all the resources and space you needed to get started. You've also been working alongside a few people in the lab since their project was relatable to yours, finding guidance and a little bit of training and support to carry your project forward. It's been busy, and it's been a good busy.

It's been good enough to keep your mind off of San.

For the most part.

You could only avoid him so many times, and it's not like the ache you felt deep in your chest, your stomach, went away. It still lingers, and it still hits you from time to time.

And it doesn't make it any easier when you get reminders.

Like meeting San's eyes across campus— only for him to break loose and shift his attention elsewhere.

The shift is a harsh, cold reminder that this may actually be over for good.

—FLASHBACK

"Hey." Sunwoo says, gently nudging you. "You okay? Haven't seen you in awhile?" You nod, half smiling before looking down at your laptop.

"Was busy." You chuckle a bit. "Was working on the fine details of my rotation presentation, along with all the data analysis we worked on." You give him a small smile. "I came to clean out the last bits of my stuff."

"It'll all blow over." He says with a reassuring smile. "For the record, I don't think it really matters but I know Professor Kim is just trying to keep everything together before it all blows up again."

"Guessing the whole world knows now?" He shrugs.

"Maybe, maybe not. I haven't heard much lately, but you know me, I don't like to meddle in things like that in general. I keep outta that shit."

"People must think greatly of me." He chuckles.

"It doesn't matter what they think. In any case, you are a good person, you're super sweet and super smart. If they choose to fix on that, that's their issue."

"Thanks, Sunwoo." You look at him. "I'm sorry I won't be able to help you after this."

"That's okay. We'll still hang out and I'm sure we'll cross paths more before I finish up here. Plus, I love Professor Choi but having Professor Kim take you under his wing is fucking sick." You laugh, playfully shoving him.

"I don't know where this will take me, but I hope it works out."

"Are you two.. still a thing? Secret's safe with me. For real."

"I know. But, no."

"I don't know the ins and outs of what happened between you and Professor Choi, but I'm sure he did it for good reason. To also protect you."

"Yeah, maybe. Who knows anymore." You sigh. "Anyway. Gotta head out to do my rotation presentation."

"Goodluck. It'll be all good." Sunwoo gives you a small smile. "Text or call me? Let's get lunch on a weekly basis or something to catch up."

"Yeah, I will. Thanks for everything, Sunwoo."

"Nah, thank you. You really helped my ass out." You laugh and playfully ruffle his hair.

"I'll see you around." You gather your things and let out a shaky sigh as you head out. You're hauling your main bag, and another tote bag that has the rest of your things from your desk. You head over to the small auditorium that Namjoon booked for your rotation presentation, giving yourself some wiggle room to set up and get situated before the three would arrive.

Too bad someone else also had the same plan.

You waltz into the room and head straight for the podium, setting your things down onto a chair in the front row. You grab your laptop and settle at the front, eyes shooting up at the door when you hear footsteps approach the entrance.

And of course it would be San.

He slowly trails in with Namjoon next to him; except, Namjoon turns to speak with a student that stopped him right by the entrance. San is in his black dress pants, white shirt and a black leather jacket. His boots are leaving sounds with every step he takes, watch gleaming on his wrist. He meets your eyes and you instantly freeze— shifting your attention back to your laptop because you don't know what the hell else to do. He doesn't say anything as he heads down the aisle and to the front row, his greeting almost sounding dull.

Forced, even.

"Y/N."

"Professor Choi." The awkwardness and the tension fills the room, and you can't help but notice how awfully clammy your hands are getting. How nervous you feel yourself getting. "How are you?"

"Good." Is all he says before plopping into seat in front while you continue to work with the AV system to get your presentation up on the screen.

"That's good." You reply without looking at him. He feels cold and so standoff-ish— it's hard to tell if he's doing this because he has to or because he actually means it. Was he really done with you? "Hope the presentation's okay." You mumble lightly. San catches on, but he continues to scroll through his phone to distract himself until Namjoon finally walks in.

"Sure you'll be fine." And it sucks. Maybe he does mean it. He doesn't say anything else, and he doesn't reassure you the way he usually does. For San, it's a front. He has to distance himself or else he'll cave. For you, it hurts nonetheless.

"Sorry! Got caught up. The dean's on his way." Namjoon pops in and sits next to San in the front row. "All good, Y/N? Do you need help with setting anything else up?"

"No, I think I got it. Thank you." You smile at him and he nods.

"Course."

"Alright, let's get this going. Sorry for the small wait." The dean comes in last, taking a seat by the two. "Hi Y/N, hope you're doing okay."

"Think so." You chuckle a bit. "Well, I'll get started if there aren't any objections?" They shake their heads. "Great." You nervously respond while Namjoon and the dean give you a small smile.

San doesn't even maintain eye contact with you.

But, it's only because it's the hardest thing to suppress his feelings for you whenever you're in front of him and he can't exactly have you like he used to.

—END

"Yo!" Jiung waves, shifting your attention towards him across the lawn. You give him a small smile, stopping in your motions to wait for him to cross over. To your left is San, patiently waiting for Zara to walk over to him. You can't help but watch; the two only a couple of feet away, their voices slightly echoing around the courtyard.

His hand hovering the small of her back as they enter the Harvey Building together.

To this day, you can still feel your heart physically drop to your gut. You're not sure when it'll pass, but you hope it's soon. You're so tired of feeling this way.

So, so tired.

"Hey." You give Jiung a tiny smile as you hug your books against your chest.

"Whattup?" It took awhile for you and Jiung to get back to normal. You always knew you would, but you needed a little more time to understand his side of things. For awhile, you were angry and hurt. All you could see was red. All you could see was Jiung openly going behind your back to talk to Professor Kim about something he didn't know anything about.

You saw the surface level.

But, as time went on, and as your hurt continued to settle into something you just needed to accept, you understood Jiung a little more. You knew he had always cared about you and you knew he was always protective of you. You knew there wasn't any ill intention behind his actions. And when you two finally came together to talk about it more maturely, you've seen that Jiung had been more understanding of your side, too. He apologized for having gotten in the middle, but he did everything out of care for you and protection. It's clearer now that the relationship you had with San wasn't just any relationship— he saw you cry, and cry, and cry. Wondering where you went wrong or what you could've done to be more careful, to prevent this from happening. He saw the look in your eyes, the way your body physically called and yearned for San's touch and love; he knew this wasn't any of those cases of power imbalance or a one-sided relationship. He felt stupid having needed time to marinate on the whole thing when he should've known you better. But, he could truly say he acted in fear and felt better to err on the side of caution.

He just wished it didn't have to end like this; with you, sad and alone. Feeling like all of it was just too good to be true, a fleeting moment.

A quick chapter in your book.

He gets that now.

When he sees San walking around, he almost feels the same energy, aura, that he feels when he sees you. It's just too bad he can't help. Even if he did, he finds it better to no longer meddle.

Maybe it'll bring you two back together again. When the time is right.

"Nothing. I just need to get some stuff together before I meet with Professor Kim in a bit."

"Nervous?"

"No, not really." You shake your head. "Things have been going well for the most part, minus little hiccups. He wanted to talk about other programs and opportunities he found fitting for me."

"Huh." Jiung cocks a brow up. "More collaborations he wants you involved in, I'm assuming." You shrug.

"If it is, I'm for it. Just hope it doesn't take up my entire schedule completely." You chuckle.

"It'll be good either way!"

"Yeah, I know. It's been good. I have no complaints." You shiver from the breeze that's picking up, digging your face deeper into the scarf you have on.

"Did you hear? There's supposed to be a random storm coming soon. Spring weather, amirite?"

"I heard."

"Are you gonna head home? You should try and head home if you can. Who knows what it'll bring here."

"I don't know. I do need to catch up on some data analysis or else I'll be behind." You pause. "Dunno if I trust myself to work productively at home. We have backup generators, right?"

"I mean, yeah. But, what if it goes out? Then, what?"

"Yeah, I don't know. Let's hope that's not one of these cases." You stop in front of the Panama Building and turn to Jiung.

"Lunch later?" You nod.

"Might be a little late. I'll text you when I'm wrapping up?"

"Sounds good. We'll wait for you."

"See you later." You wave before heading inside the building, shimmying off the cold once you step inside and try to warm yourself up. You head down to the lab, setting your things down on your desk before immediately getting started on your work for the day. You try to pace yourself and plan out your tasks well so that you're able to step out for your meeting with Professor Kim and grab lunch with your friends in a few hours.

It's busy, and time flies. Busy is good. At least your mind is occupied with other pressing matters.

Time slips by so quickly you're almost running late to your meeting with Professor Kim. You put a pause in your current run for behavior, grabbing your laptop and a notebook before darting up to Professor Kim's office. You power-walk down the familiar hallway before finally reaching his open door, finding him occupied at his desk.

"Hey!" Namjoon smiles when you walk into his office and plop down in the chair. "Give me a second, just finishing up this email."

"All good." You chuckle. "Sorry I'm a few minutes late. Was running behavior."

"No worries, I figured. Get comfortable." You plop onto the seat in front of his desk, watching as his fingers move swiftly on the keyboard before he navigates to the mouse and clears his throat. "Okay! All good." He laughs a bit. "How's it going?"

"Good! Pretty busy per usual."

"Good busy, I suppose?"

"Yes, good busy. It's been productive. Days are going by quick. I've got some really promising data for this cohort and I think you might be happy with it."

"I'm happy with any progress." You laugh. "That sounds great! Any other ideas? Any other plans at the moment?"

"Well, I'm not sure yet. As long as I'm on the right path, I think there are other avenues I can explore if the results continue to trend upwards."

"Then, let's explore when we get there. I know you'll continue to do great work, and the results look promising. It all looks promising."

"Thank you, Professor Kim."

"There is something else I wanted to talk to you about." You cock a brow up and tilt your head to the side.

"Sure. I'm all ears."

"Professor Qi from the Mirae Biomedical Institute contacted me the other day. She was really impressed by your symposium presentation and the work you've done in Professor Choi's lab and mine. She thinks you'd be a great asset in their program, especially since she's starting a new clinical research study that I also agree you'd contribute well to. It's a study examining neural activity and behavioral patterns in individuals with conditions like bipolar disorder, anxiety, and OCD, etc. You get the gist. A lot of your work is relatable and can be used to push this study forward."

"Oh my god, wow." You respond in disbelief, shock, even. You didn't think anyone was really paying attention to your work like that, especially with what has happened. You kinda felt like a lost cause even though nothing entirely catastrophic has happened. "I was not expecting that."

"Why not?" Namjoon laughs. "You deserve the credit. What do you think about it?"

"I'm really honored, truly. I think it's a great opportunity."

"It is. Not a lot of people get recruited this way, especially with a research assistant position included in the package." You nod silently, still trying to take it in. "Now, if you do want to move forward, it does mean we'll have to get your transfer application in ASAP. They do offer housing assistance should you need it, and they're willing to help cover any other expenses until you settle."

"Right, transferring." You look down at your palms. Truthfully, Mirae wasn't that far from here; it'd be about 2 hours out, but you could easily get there by a drive down the less busier highway or the bullet train.

You'd have to make that effort to see your friends, meet halfway.

San comes into your head.

"I know it's a bit scary, you've already gotten accustomed to things here even if it's just been your first year. But, luckily, it's not that far away and you can always meet your friends halfway. The train can connect you to campus and back." He tries to reassure you because he really wants you to take this. Of course, he can't force you, but he knows this would be beneficial to your growth.

"Yeah, I know. It's not that bad."

"It's not. Plus, you guys all drive, right?" You nod.

"When do I have to get my transfer application in?" Namjoon pulls up the information on his desktop and lets out a small sigh.

"In two weeks. We can get that done. I can write up a letter of recommendation for you and have Professors Choi and Bahng do one each." He looks at you. "Do you feel comfortable asking Professor Jeong for one since you TA'd for him? It's not entirely necessary, but wanted to see how you felt."

"Um, to be honest, not really." He nods.

"That's fine. We don't need it. Us three should be more than enough." He gives you a tiny smile. "Think you can get a personal statement and everything else together by then?"

"Yeah, I think so. Shouldn't be too much of a hassle."

"I can help with official transcripts, too."

"That sounds great." Your expression is blank and Namjoon tilts his head to try and get a read from you.

"Why the face?"

"I truthfully didn't think I was qualified or that anyone was really paying attention." Namjoon chuckles a bit.

"Listen, your grades are fantastic. The work you do is incredible. I fully think you are capable of handling all the ins and outs of this transfer and transitioning over." Namjoon smiles. "The program isn't too different from ours, but it will definitely offer you a lot of different options and pathways with the clinical study picking up."

"It's alot, and I'm grateful you believe in me. I just don't know if I can handle it. The changes."

"Don't second-guess yourself, okay? You are more than capable. It won't be much different from what you're already doing. Just a 'lil more umph. More seasoning, if you will."

"You think so?" He nods.

"You'll still focus on research, but you'll be split between classes and eventually, the hospital. Unfortunately, that does probably mean there is some weekend work in store for you." You let out a breath, eyes still on Professor Kim. He lets out another laugh [of endearment] and nods, clasping his hands together. "I know that look. I've been there before, but trust me. You'll do amazing, and you'll excel, no doubt. You shouldn't restrict yourself just because you assume you won't do well. Your work and ethic has proved otherwise."

"Thank you, Professor Kim. I think I do wanna move forward with this."

"Cool, then we can work together and get you set up. I'll loop you into an email with her so we can all chat and finalize this. Hopefully before the week ends." You nod.

"And I mean it, by the way." You pause. "Thank you for everything. For supporting me and pushing me forward regardless of everything that's happened."

"You're welcome. I would never let that define you." You give him a small smile, fiddling with your laptop sleeve— dying to ask him about the one person that has been occupying your mind the most. "You okay otherwise?"

"Yeah, I think so. Just thought about some things, but nothing important."

"He's doing okay." Namjoon gives you a tiny smile.

"I— huh? How'd you know I was—"

"Because I just do. He asks about you, too."

"Oh." Is all you say, swallowing the thick lump forming in your throat. "Well, I'm glad he's okay."

"Him and Professor Choi #2 received approval for their joint program, so they'll be getting the real estate they wanted in the new building."

"That's amazing. I'm glad it all worked out." Namjoon nods.

"Anything else I can do for you in the meantime?"

"No, that's it. For now. I'm sure more things will come up when we meet next."

"Sounds good. Well, you let me know if anything comes up or if I can do anything else for you."

"Thanks, Professor Kim." You give him one last smile before grabbing your things and heading out the door.

And the rest of your day is pretty eventful, but not as eventful as San's turns out to be.

While you busy yourself with your new classes, lab work and hanging out with your friends, San is having to force himself to go out with his own group. For awhile, he kinda sulked. Stayed home, did his own thing. Kept quiet. But, it got old to Jongho [and the rest of them] quick— hence, now he's being forced to leave the comfort of his home.

He guesses he could use the fresh air, the night out. It is Mingi's birthday, so he doesn't think he could've said no otherwise.

"Ayo!" Jongho calls out as he enters San's house, twirling the key around his finger as he waits for San's response.

"I told you I'd be fine driving." San slowly comes down his steps, dressed in a simple tee, jeans and a bomber jacket.

"Okay, miss attitude." Jongho laughs. "I'm trying to make it easier so you don't have to worry about parking and what not." San sighs.

"Thanks." He shrugs. "Do I look okay? Not that it matters."

"Can you at least try to be somewhat happy? Especially when we see Mingi later?"

"I'm sorry, I really am trying. Just kinda hard to."

"I know, and I truly think you could use this night to get your mind off of things. It's been some time, give yourself a little break." Jongho nudges him.

"Yeah, yeah. You're right." San gives him a small smile.

"Things will get better, but you gotta stop sulking about it or else you'll just keep enforcing this negativity to come for you."

"Wow, that's the deepest shit I've ever heard from you."

"And it won't come again, so fucking take it or leave it." San laughs a bit and shakes his head.

"Can we go? Before I change my mind and tell Mingi I'm sick or something."

"Hell no." Jongho starts power-walking to his car, making San take his time as he checks around the living room and kitchen once more before locking up and slipping into the passenger's seat. San slouches in his seat while Jongho drives off towards the busy downtown area, scrolling through the new group chat created for Mingi's birthday to catch up.

"They're all there already."

"Yeah, well. They wanted a head start."

"I thought Zara wasn't coming."

"She wasn't, but I think her initial plans ended up getting canceled."

"I see." San sighs and rests his head back against the head rest. The bar is ways away from campus, thankfully. It's a new bar that just opened a month ago, and Mingi's birthday was the perfect excuse for everyone to get together for a night and relieve some stress. When Jongho arrives at their destination, he's having to park down the block due to how crazy busy the area is tonight. It's a chilly night, and San has to tuck his hands into the pockets of his bomber jacket to try and keep himself warm on the walk. When they enter, they see familiar faces near the back wall of the bar, Mingi's loud voice radiating towards the entrance.

"My fucking boys!" He says, already intoxicated. He pulls San and Jongho into a hug before the two start greeting the group properly.

"Hey. I didn't think you were coming." San says, pulling Zara into a hug. She's got on a jeans, high heeled boots and an off-the shoulder sweater on. She's got a bit more makeup on tonight— she's gone for the natural blush kinda look. San is not gonna lie, she looks good.

But, she will never be you.

"Yeah, plans got canceled and I was already dressed so, figured I'd make use of the outfit somehow." San chuckles a bit.

"Glad you were able to." He gives her a small smile before greeting the rest of the crew that was there, including Namjoon.

The night starts off pretty chill for San. He's taken a few shots to try and keep up with Mingi, no longer wanting to hear him complain about how no one wanted to take shots for his birthday. After the third, he tries to slow it down and cashes in for a small can of beer while Mingi continues on with spreading the love throughout the group by passing out more shots. The music is right up everyone's ally, making most of their group bounce along to the beats and sing along loudly. San's got himself next to Zara at the booth— both of them sipping on their poison for the rest of the night.

"So, San." She turns to him, her chin resting on the palm of her hand. "How's everything going?" San looks at her and despite the blush she's wearing, he can tell her cheeks are naturally flushing red at the question, at being tipsy. At the fact that she has him alone.

Because you aren't around.

"Good. Super busy, but good." San is pretty drunk, not gonna lie. He doesn't normally drink like this, but he figured he'd just enjoy himself while around his bestfriends. The beer obviously isn't helping his case, but he believes he'll be fine. He doesn't think anything will come out of this anyway. "Heard you've secured some new funding and you've got three more grad students."

"I did, yeah."

"Congrats." San smiles at her before gently tapping his beer can against her cocktail glass.

"What's new with you? We haven't been able to catch up for a bit."

"Yeah, sorry. It's just— it's been a rollercoaster."

"I bet." Zara sips on her drink. There's a slight pause before she's tracing the rim of her glass, then speaking up again. "I'm sorry about everything that's happened." San looks at her. They're sitting in close proximity; enough for San to feel her arm rub against him whenever she moves, her body heat.

"You don't have to be sorry for anything." He gives her a small smile. "It is what it is. Things are pretty stable now."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"So, are you not seeing her anymore?" San takes a big gulp of his beer while keeping his eyes trained on the crowd in front of him. Her.

You always come back in the picture.

"No."

"I'm sorry."

"All good. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be." Zara looks up at him and they meet eyes for a moment. To her, the tension feels thick. But to San, he's just going with the motions. He's drunk, she's pretty, he's chillin'. Nothing more to it. But, she looks at him in a certain way and it has him slightly furrowing his brows when he tilts his head to look at her a little more, a little deeper.

"I'm sure it hasn't been easy." Her eyes are moving down to his nose, to his lips. San is following her gaze and he knows all too well where this could lead. He should've known to break contact, but before he could even think about it, Zara is the first to lean in and make her move— lips pressing against San's that he's instantly in shock and can't process right away.

But, what he does know is that this doesn't feel right, and his body is already rejecting the action because it isn't you.

"Zara—" San gently pushes Zara back with a frown on his face. "Zara, I can't. I— this can't happen. I'm sorry if I ever misled you, but—"

"Oh." She almost looks confused. "No, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, how embarrassing." She shies away. "I should've known."

"I'm sorry—" He tries to repeat again, but she's shaking her head and walking off towards the bathroom. "Fuck." He runs his hand through his hair, letting out a heavy sigh. He feels terrible that it happened. One, it shouldn't have happened. Two, he didn't mean to hurt his friend.

Three, it wasn't you.

It sounds so fucked up, but even after all of that, his mind still takes him to you and he can't help but drunkly panic as if you were around to see it. It should've never happened, it should've never happened.

He didn't want that to happen.

They had been hanging out for awhile, but the last thing he wanted was to lead her on unintentionally. And he doesn't think he did, knowing she had feelings for him from the get-go. He was there for her and enjoyed her company, but kept enough distance to make sure it didn't cross any boundaries.

He didn't want that to happen.

He pushes his way through the crowd and finds his way outside, letting the cool air hit his skin. If he hadn't made his way out of the bar, he might've [quite frankly] yacked from the slight nausea and anxiety he's feeling. He pulls his phone out of his back pocket, quickly scrolling through his call log to find your name.

You don't answer when he calls.

So, he texts.

san: i'm sorry

san: i miss you so badly

san: i miss us

san: zara kissed me and you're probably gonna hate me for it

san: i'm so sorry baby, pls come back to me i miss you. i don't fucking care anymore, i just need you.

you: san stop

you: get home safely okay?

san: no i want you with me though

you: san, please stop making this harder than it already is.

And then he calls again. Because for some reason, he feels like you already hate him and want nothing to do with him over a dumb 'lil mistake that he had no intention of making.

He calls again.

And again. Even when he's got his back pressed against the wall, crouching near the ground until he can hear your voice clearly on the other line. Zara steps out to get a breather, but she sees that he's already on the phone and it must be with you. She doesn't know why she expected anything out of that stupid, silly little kiss.

He was always gonna run back to you.

It was always gonna be you.

You finally answer, but it's because you think something's wrong and you don't want anything to happen to San.

You don't even know if you can stomach hearing him right now.

"Baby." He drunkly murmurs on the phone and it causes you to swallow the lump forming in your throat— shut your eyes to prevent any more tears from falling. "Sweetheart, you there?"

"San, stop this. That's all I'm asking from you." You shakily respond.

"Why?"

"What do you mean why? You shouldn't be calling ne as if things are okay."

"But, they can be, angel. We can make it okay again."

"Please don't call me that." You barely say above a whisper, tears sting your eyes, throat aching. "If you need a ride, I can call you a cab."

"No. Mm'fine. I just wanted to hear your voice because I miss you so damn much."

"You're making this way too hard. Please just go home and get sleep, okay?"

"You're gonna hate me more than you already do."

"I don't hate you. But, whatever your business is with her, is your business with her. None of this pertains to me."

"I don't have business with her. I want you. I just want you. It's always you." You purse your lips tightly when you remember his text— of course Zara would take the opportunity, and now he's confessing his love to you.

All of this was so fucked up.

"I love you."

"San."

"You don't feel the same anymore?" You feel the burn in your throat when you take a moment to pause.

"Can you just put Jongho on the phone, please?"

"Why?" He whines.

"Because I need to make sure you get home safely." He clicks his teeth.

"Fine." He whines some more before he's calling out to Jongho and telling him his girl would like to have a word. "Think my girl is mad. C-can you tell her we can work this out? I-I don't want her mad anymore." In which Jongho follows with a quick 'yeah, ok' before snatching up his phone.

"Hello?"

"Hi. I'm sorry to trouble you with this, but can you please make sure he gets home in one piece? I think it's best he stops calling me, too."

"Of course. I'll stay with him."

"Thank you, Professor—"

"Jongho."

"Thank you, Jongho." You hang up the call and instantly toss your phone to the side before your tears start overflowing. You let the sheets swallow you whole before you cry.

And you just.. cry.

Until you tire yourself and fall asleep, even though you tried to stay up to make sure nothing else came in from San.

Nothing does, anyway.

Jongho throws San into the car and tells him to chill while he says his final goodbyes to everyone. Mingi, Yeosang and the rest of the group are laughing it off, assuming San is just drunk and slumped for the night. And he kinda is, but he's sad. He's completely heartbroken. He doesn't wanna be alone for the night, and Jongho says he'll take the guest room so he doesn't have to wallow in his drunkenness alone.

Yet, he still feels like he is.

When he gets home, he lazily kicks off his shoes and runs a quick shower. The world is still spinning more than he'd like, so he downs a whole water bottle before finishing up his routine and slipping under the sheets. Jongho has left him to his peace, also getting ready for bed in the guest bathroom and bedroom.

San can barely get comfortable because he can't even close his eyes and feel still for a second. He lies on his tummy, sprawled out across his bed since there's no use in leaving space for two.

He wishes he could.

Your side remains empty.

"You good?" Jongho pokes his head in to see a shirtless San facing the opposite way.

"Mhm." He mumbles. "Thanks."

"Yeah. Well, you know where to find me if you need anything." San stays silent, making Jongho shut his door gently before retreating to the bedroom.

San does know what he needs, though.

It's unfortunate your side remains empty.

Monday comes, and San is hoping he doesn't run into you.

He's hoping he doesn't run into you because he's not sure how to explain himself, and it's not like he can, anyway. But, it'll also make everything real for him— too real for his liking.

It'll be too real that he drunk texted you and called you, confessing his love after an incident that should've never happened in the first place.

It'll be too real that you aren't his.

It'll be too real that you never came to be by his side and that your side of the bed remains empty.

San sighs to himself as he quickly rushes into the Harvey Building, hurrying down to the basement and unlocking his office door. He sets his bags down and plops onto his chair, getting settled for the day. He couldn't sleep last night, so he decided to get up before the sun rose to workout in the faculty gym. He might've pushed himself a little harder than usual, his arms already feeling the soreness from the upper body workout he did. He'll be extra tired today, but at least his day will fly by with the shit he has to do.

He just hopes he doesn't run into you.

Because somehow, when he sees you, time stops and he feels frozen.

He lets out a sigh and starts working on a few progress reports that are literally due tomorrow. He's gotten through most of it and thankfully, just needs to add a few more details before sending it off. He also just got word that he won an award, and the foundation has been asking for a bunch of material to get ready for the award ceremony in a few months.

He hopes he can still share that news with you at some point.

Until then, he'll gather some childhood and school photos, candids he has from being in the classroom and doing lectures, other award photos; you know the deal. He's gotta write an acceptance speech that's 500-600 words and lasts about 2-3 minutes, plus answer a bunch of questions on a sheet they sent him.

It takes up a good chunk of his early morning that he's grabbing coffee right before his meeting with Namjoon and Jongho about the new program and real estate. He mutters a quick 'oh shit' to himself when he looks down at his watch, wrapping up his last thoughts before switching his desktop computer to sleep mode and gathering his phone and badge. When he slips out of his office, he finds the basement office more packed than usual. Lots of his lab members are meeting with people from other labs to collaborate or get guidance on a project. Sunwoo is busying himself with the data on his computer, working on his next data presentation for the lab meeting next week. He's noticed that him and Belle don't talk anymore, and he wonders why; he has an inkling it has to do with you, but he won't pry unless he hears about it somehow.

They all toss their 'hello's' his way while he rushes out to grab his coffee before making his way to the electrical engineering building.

Luckily, the walk is quiet.

San sips on his coffee and makes his way into a room that Jongho booked for their meeting. He's not here yet, but Namjoon isn't either, so San sits at the table by himself— mindlessly scrolling through his phone. He hasn't deleted your text thread [call him crazy], and he still has all your photos in his album. He hasn't changed the 'Baby 💕' listed as your contact name, he hasn't changed his home wallpaper that consists of a shot from behind you looking out at the beach view.

It's all equally tearing him apart and getting him by at the same time.

He can't seem to get his mind off of you and it makes him think that the universe is playing some kind of sick, twisted game with him.

Or, maybe it's a sign that he just has to accept his feelings for you. That you were always gonna be the one for him no matter how hard he tried to convince himself it couldn't work—

"Ayo." Namjoon pulls him out of his thoughts when he walks in and plops down on a seat next to him.

"Sup."

"I see Jongho's running a bit late." San checks his texts to see the unread 'running a few mins late - be there soon' text from the man himself.

"Yeah. I almost forgot myself. Was too busy getting the award materials together." Namjoon smiles.

"That's a big one. Definitely deserved."

"Thanks, boss."

"How's everything else?"

"Good, I guess." But Namjoon can see it's deeper than that, and San isn't all that great at hiding his true feelings.

"You guess?"

"Yeah, why?" He looks at Namjoon.

"She's doing great."

"Is she?"

"Yeah, really."

"That's good to hear."

"Qi Jaemi from Mirae reached out and is recruiting Y/N into their program. She started a clinical study not too long ago that's moving fast, and the work that Y/N has done in our labs is incredibly beneficial and relates well to what she's focused on. She offered to support her and give her a research assistant position while she's studying for extra financial support." Namjoon meets San's eyes. "I think she'd flourish and do amazing in it. Can't let her talents go to waste."

"I agree." San shifts in his seat. "So, she'll be transferring?"

"Yeah, sounds like. It's promising and I told her she has my support. I think she's gonna take it and not backtrack."

"T-that's great. I hope she does." San says.

"I'll need your help with writing a rec letter for her transfer application. If that's okay."

"Yeah, of course. Anything." He is truly happy for you and thinks it's the best move, especially for a very well known professor like Professor Qi. After everything, he's glad your work is still being recognized and that you're opening new doors to different opportunities.

He hopes you do move forward with it.

Selfishly enough, he hopes you take it and this will eventually lead you two back together. To a time where you don't have to hide your relationship and be loved undercover.

To a time where you two could just be happy without any outside noise.

"You miss her?"

"I do." San barely responds. "I really do, and I don't know how I'm supposed to get past this. I tried, Joon. I can't let her go." He sighs.

"Listen, I can't tell you what to do anymore. My job doesn't include policing you down to the T. Things have settled and brushed over, but it doesn't mean the dean isn't watching you or her. Luckily, if she takes this, it won't be as big of a deal as it is now while she's a student here. He'd still wanna make sure you aren't getting distracted, though."

"Okay.. but that's great, right? Things have settled for the both of us." Namjoon sighs. "If she takes the opportunity, it changes everything."

"Yes, which is why.. whatever you do, please just remember not to mess this up for her or you. The both of you are on great paths right now."

"It was never my intention to do so in the first place. I wanna add value to her life, not take away from it."

"So, what are you trying to say?"

"I love her."

—taglist: @asjkdk @interweab @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs @persphonesorchid @mxnsxngie @jycas @cowboydk @vcutparis @chngbnwf @struggling101 @sanhwalvr @angelqueendom @barbielibra @brown88 @choisansplushie @yunhoswrldddd @hyukssunflower @vickykazuya @lucid-galaxys-world @jaytheatiny @pommelex @thechaotictheoryy @vixensss @santineez @nopension @domfikeluva @in-somnias-world @my-atiny-kookie-rkive @mountiiny @naoristerling @onmymymyway @thecutiepieme @wyrated @randajjjad

#namjoon def part time couples counselor #like what cant that man do???#& it’s an actual storm LMAOOOO #but an excuse for me to put those two together kekeke #what u said about zara? THAT PART.#hwaslayer: wildfire #san x reader #ateez fanfic

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goevent · 2 years ago

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Finding the Best Counselor in San Antonio for Your Needs

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Source: https://counselors-near-me.blogspot.com/2023/07/Best%20Counselor-in-San-Antonio.html

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mangiomochi · 2 months ago

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LM’s Social Media

I made this long post to list all the social media accounts and profiles of Luigi Mangione. As many of you already know, a lot of his profiles have been taken down. The platforms where we could see the more personal side of Luigi and his experiences, like Facebook, Instagram, and Reddit, have been deleted. However, fortunately, some of his profiles on other platforms remain active to this day.

I’ll try to list each of these sites. If you see anything that needs to be corrected or know of another LM profile that isn’t listed here, I’d appreciate it if you shared it. My goal is to keep this post as updated as possible.

Disclaimer: English is not my first language, so if you notice anything odd in the writing, I apologize.

Facebook: luigi.mangione.2

Status: Taken Down First post: Jan 17, 2010 Last post: Aug 24, 2019

LM has had a Facebook account for quite some time—likely his first social media platform. His earliest posts date back to 2010. His last post was in 2019, which was also the year he was most active on the platform. That year, he posted several photos from a trip to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico with his fraternity and the three months he spent as a head counselor at Stanford in Palo Alto, CA.

Instagram: @luigi.from.fiji

Status: Taken Down First post: Aug 13, 2018 Last post: Aug 27, 2021

LM’s first Instagram post was in the summer of 2018. In that post, he explicitly mentioned that he created the account just to give one more follower to his sister’s blog. (LM has two sisters.) He also tagged his sister @lifewithlu__—or whatever handle she had at the time. If you've come across accounts currently using that handle on Instagram or Twitter, they are fake. LM’s sister apparently changed her username a while ago and later deactivated her account after LM’s arrest.

As for LM’s Instagram activity, his last posts were from the summer of 2021. He shared photos from a trip to Puerto Rico, where he was working remotely for some time, and from a trip to Hawaii with his other sister. LM also posted pictures with a friend he met at Stanford in 2019.

Additionally, LM had a highlight section featuring his predictions for 2027, which he uploaded in Jan 2021.

LM became inactive in 2022, despite appearing in a few posts made by his roommates in Hawaii. However, many of these posts were later deleted, or the accounts were set to private—likely to completely disassociate from LM and the allegations against him, or to avoid harassment from either his supporters or detractors.

In 2022, despite not posting anything himself, he was tagged in various posts and stories by his roommates and friends in Hawaii.

Instagram 2: @luiginmangione (probably fake)

Status: Taken Down

This account is probably fake, but we can’t be entirely sure. Unlike the confirmed account, this one was private and also has been deactivated. It had zero posts and 404 followers—an interesting detail, as "404" in some areas of computing means "not found," which is notable given that LM was reported missing in 2024.

As for the profile picture and bio, there was nothing we hadn’t seen before, making it highly unlikely that this account actually belonged to him.

Instagram 3 or Another Social Media Account

In messages between LM and one of his friends, his friend mentioned that he was wondering who the person trying to follow him was. It seems that in February 2024, LM created an account where it was impossible to recognize that it was him.

YouTube

First active: Unknown Last active: May 2024

You've probably already seen his supposed channel—the one with a single uploaded video and another that was never released. What was in that second video? Most likely some form of self-promotion from whoever was behind that account. Fortunately, the channel was taken down before that could happen.

However, we do know that LM had not just one but three YouTube channels, all of which were unfortunately removed due to YouTube’s absurd policies. According to the CNN article where this was mentioned, LM hadn't uploaded anything in seven months, meaning his last content would have been from May 2024. It's a complete mystery what he had posted—most likely something related to his trip to Asia. Sadly, we may never know. YouTube acted so quickly against LM’s channels that the internet didn’t have time to archive the deleted content.

Another possible type of content LM might have uploaded to these channels includes drone footage from Hawaii and Asia, projects from his time at Penn (2016–2020), or even school projects.

GitHub: lnmangione

Status: Still Up First active: Feb 27, 2015 Last active: May 8, 2021

In case you’re not familiar, GitHub is a platform where users can store and update code—directly related to LM’s career and essential for anyone studying or working in a field that involves coding.

LM was active on GitHub from 2015 to 2021, contributing to personal projects, FTC (Robotics), and university assignments. In 2020, after graduating, he used it to prepare for coding interviews. By 2021, he was mainly working on private projects, likely related to his remote job. Apparently, Luigi stopped being active on GitHub in 2021.

Twitter: @PepMangione

Status: Again, Still Up First tweet: Apr 14, 2016 Last active: Jun 10, 2024

This was probably the social media platform where LM was most active before his arrest. His most active year was 2024, and he had been using this account since 2016, although he didn’t post anything after 2016 and only became active again in 2021

His earliest tweets appear to be automated posts with random numbers, possibly tests for some kind of Twitter-connected application.

Aside from that, his Twitter provides insight into his ideology, which seems somewhat ambiguous. Politically, he didn’t appear to have strong affiliations.

After his arrest, LM’s account was taken down but later reinstated. And it was recently taken down again on March 19, 2025, for a few hours and then reinstated. He followed only 71 people—later 70, after a Japanese poker player he met in Tokyo in February removed him as a follower. Currently, LM’s account has over half a million followers. Before his arrest, several accounts followed LM during the time he was missing—most of them were likely bot accounts, though not all, as some belonged to friends trying to contact him through public tweets you’ve probably already seen.

LM didn’t follow any of his friends on Twitter. Some of his friends did follow him, which means either he never followed them back or he unfollowed them at some point.

Regarding his banner, it consists of three images:

Breloom from Pokémon – This is directly linked to Theory 286, which you may have heard about. It connects Breloom’s Pokédex number (286) with LM’s total number of Twitter posts, which was also 286 (now 285), as well as with certain health insurance denial codes. Personally, I think this is just a coincidence. Breloom was likely there because LM liked the Pokémon—it’s a Fighting type, which can be linked to physical activity, and is a Mushroom, which could relate to his interest in psychedelics.

X-ray from his surgery – This was from a procedure that took place on July 21, 2023 (though I’m not sure if that’s the exact date). This means his header was updated at least after that date.

A shirtless photo of him on a mountain in Hawaii – We know that one of LM’s favorite activities was hiking.

The last known activity of LM on Twitter was on June 10, 2024. That day, he retweeted a post and sent a DM to Gurwinder in response to a tweet, asking him to show him how to curate his feed to display more valuable and educational content.

After LM disappeared, during July, October and November, his friends tried to reach out through tweets and probably also through private messages.

Twitter alt: (Fake)

I don’t remember the name of the account, but it was something related to mushrooms, it was initially linked to LM due to its similarities with his interests. However, it was later clarified that this profile does not belong to LM, and the shared interests were purely coincidental.

Linktree: lnmangione

State: Still up

Linktree is a platform that allows users to compile multiple links into a single page, making it easier to share various profiles, websites, or projects. Many content creators and professionals use it to organize their online presence.

LM did have a Linktree, but instead of links, it only contained a series of emojis. No actual links to his profiles or projects were listed, making it unclear what the purpose of his account was.

Here’s a possible interpretation of LM’s emojis based on what we know about his interests:

💻🤓 – Likely represents his tech side.

🥷🏃‍♂️🧘‍♂️🏋️ – Suggests his active lifestyle, including exercise, meditation, and discipline. The ninja could represent martial arts.

📚🤓 – Reflects his love for books and self-education.

🦍🧠 – Likely represents LM’s interest in gorillas, as seen on his Goodreads, Reddit and Twitter.

🍄🧠 – Likely a nod to his interest in psychedelics.

🐄👨‍⚖️ – Might reference ethical concerns about the meat industry or food regulations. It could also be a nod to Moo’s Law, a book exploring the rise of lab-grown meat, its potential to revolutionize food production, and the ethical, environmental, and economic implications of this technology.

☯️ – Represents balance, Eastern philosophy, or mindfulness practices.

Snapchat: luigimangione

State: Taken down

LM’s Snapchat was listed in his yearbook alongside his Facebook, suggesting he was quite active on the platform. After his arrest, his account remained up for a few days. Someone posted screenshots of his profile on TikTok before it was taken down, but I haven’t been able to find them. Perhaps that profile was also taken down due to TikTok’s constant censorship. His avatar was surprisingly well-made. If anyone has those screenshots and can share them, I would be grateful and will, of course, give credit.

Substack: @anotherdayanotherplay

Status: Still Up

Substack was where LM followed many of the writers he engaged with on Twitter. One of them was Gurwinder, a British blogger whose work LM seemed to appreciate deeply. He liked it enough to purchase a premium subscription to Gurwinder’s Substack blog, The Prism, which costs $200. This subscription granted LM perks like a video call with the writer.

Gurwinder’s articles cover topics such as gamification, short-form video platforms and their negative effects, and NPC behavior.

You can read more about this meeting in the article Gurwinder wrote about LM.

TikTok: @lnmangione (Fake)

Not Owned by LM

If you’ve seen some of LM’s tweets, you’ll know he was against short-form video platforms, making it unlikely that he ever had a TikTok account. The account mentioned here does not appear to belong to LM. Most of its reposted content is in German and English, Additionally, the type of content shared on this account doesn’t align with LM’s known interests.

TikTok started gaining popularity between 2018 and 2020, so we can’t completely rule out the possibility that LM once had an account.

LinkedIn: Luigi Mangione

Status: Still Up Joined: Feb, 2015 Last active: 2023

LinkedIn is the go-to social media platform for job searching, and LM’s profile provides detailed insight into his education and work history. His last known job was at TrueCar, where he had been working remotely for some time. He left this job at some point in 2023, but he never updated his LinkedIn to reflect this change.

The exact reason LM left TrueCar remains unknown. One theory suggests he resigned to take time off for traveling and recovering from his surgery. Another theory points to company-wide layoffs at TrueCar. However, we can’t confirm anything for sure, as TrueCar declined to provide detailed statements, citing employee privacy—specifically in LM’s case.

Reddit: u/mister_cactus

Status: Taken Down Joined: Feb 23, 2016 Last active: May 25, 2024

Reddit was one of the platforms where LM was quite active, and he remained so until May 2024, sharing details about his travel through Asia. LM created his Reddit account in 2016, the same year as his Twitter.

In the beginning, his activity was mostly related to university projects, garage sales, and Pokémon Go. Over the years, he also engaged with posts discussing brain fog, spondylolisthesis (spondy), and other topics. From his comments, we know that at some point, his health insurance provider was Blue Cross Blue Shield. He also shared details about his struggles with spondylolisthesis and how a surfing accident in 2022 worsened his condition.

In 2023, LM posted about his decision to undergo spinal fusion surgery, sharing research on successful cases. His most recent Reddit activity in 2024 included reposting videos of the mass street livestreams that have become common. LM seemed highly aware of how technology was creating these dystopian scenes.

His final Reddit post detailed what he packed for his trip to Asia—notable items included:

Backpacks

An iPhone 13 Mini

A drone - DJI Mini 2 Drone

A physical book (LM preferred them over digital ones)

Other personal essentials

Unfortunately, his account was taken down shortly after being discovered. It's unclear whether this was due to Reddit’s questionable policies or possibly mass reports against the account.

Goodreads: luigimangione

Status: Set to Private

LM’s Goodreads account gained attention after his arrest, offering a detailed look into his reading preferences. His library included a mix of genres, with notable categories such as:

Self-help books

Back pain management

Psychedelics

Agronomics

Moo’s Law

Exercise books

Books about Hawaiian islands

Fantasy and science fiction, including A Brave New World and Harry Potter

LM was quite active on the platform, frequently writing detailed reviews and sometimes even adding handwritten notes to his books.

Steam: Pep

Status: Still Up Joined: Oct 20, 2013 Last active: Jul 7, 2024

Steam is the most popular platform for purchasing games, and LM had been active on it for a long time. His last recorded activity was on July 7, 2024—exactly six months and 2 days before his arrest. The last game he played was PUBG.

Looking at his library, you can see the wide variety of games he played over 11 years since Oct 2013. One touching detail is that many of his friends still have him added, and one of them even changed their username to "FreeLuigi"—a clear sign of loyalty and support. That’s definitely a good friend.

LM also had an alt account added, but nothing noteworthy has been mentioned about this account.

The last games LM played are:

PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS – last played on July 7, 2024 Orwell – last played on June 28, 2024 Spelunky 2 – last played on June 2, 2024

Tinder

Joined: Nov 27, 2021 Last active: Dec 18, 2022

Apparently, Luigi was only active on Tinder for a short time in December 2022, though his profile dates back to November 27, 2021. His love life is also a complete mystery, so it’s interesting that he even had a Tinder account. Shoutout to the person who spent 15 bucks to unlock the unique photos Luigi had here 🫶

Trello: @luigimangione

Status: Still Up Joined: Unknown Last active: Unknown

Trello is a platform designed to help teams organize their work. There isn’t much to see on LM’s account, but his profile picture is the protagonist of Spelunky—one of the games he has logged the most hours on in Steam.

Pinterest: luigimangione

Status: Still Up Joined: Unknown Last active: Unknown

There isn’t much to see here. LM only saved a hoodie, likely as a show of support for Tim Urban and his blog Wait But Why—one of the writers he was most enthusiastic about.

Spotify (Fake)

These Spotify profiles began circulating just hours after Luigi Mangione’s name became widely known. However, these profiles are fake and seem to be an attempt to link Luigi to various musical tastes—such as artists like Clairo, Charlie XCX, or Blackpink. If you’ve tried to research Luigi’s musical preferences, you’ll know that there’s very little information available. The only two songs we know Luigi listened to are from his SoundCloud account.

SoundCloud

Status: Still Up Joined: Unknown Last active: Unknown

This is where Luigi liked two EDM tracks that are not very well known. These are currently the only reference we have to LM’s musical tastes.

Chess: sexytwerker69

Status: Still Up Joined: Sep 19, 2017 Last active: Dec 22, 2023

This is one of my favorites. The nickname is quite original and gives us a glimpse into Luigi’s sense of humor. This profile was created in 2017, and the profile picture is a unique selfie of Luigi biting an apple—one of the few selfies he had taken. This confirms that the account is indeed his.

Other noteworthy details include that his last activity on the account was in 2023. Additionally, he had the Italian flag on his profile instead of the American flag, showcasing his pride in his Italian heritage—just in case that wasn’t clear enough.

Venmo

Status: Still Up

Venmo is a personal payment platform commonly used in the United States.

Activity on LM’s account is mostly from 2017, the year when Luigi was selling Christmas lights at his university. While we’re not entirely sure what he was raising money for, many of the payments made to and from him included some of the silly comments that showcased Luigi’s sense of humor.

DISQUS: @luigimangione

State: Still up Joined: Jun 20, 2017 Last active: Jun 20, 2017

LM's only activity here was commenting on a post from Wait But Why. The blog post was Neuralink and the Brain’s Magical Future. This was the only community he followed and his only interaction on the platform.

Sporcle: lnmangione

State: Still up Joined: Jan 23, 2024 Last active: Feb 4, 2024

Sporcle is a trivia and quiz platform where users can test their knowledge on various topics. LM had an account here, among the quizzes he completed were Most Visited Websites, Countries in Europe, SpongeBob Characters, Most Populous Countries, US States, Computer Hardware Parts, Programming Language Popularity, Genetics Vocabulary, Super Secure Bunker and Erase the Periodic Table.

Devpost: luigimangione

State: Still up

This is a platform where developers showcase and submit projects for hackathons. LM was active here during his university years, submitting a project for PennApps competition. Not much to see, but it gives a glimpse into his early coding days.

Other sites that seem to belong to Luigi are:

Apple Profile State: Still up A default profile linked to Apple services, not much to see here.

DockerHub State: Still up A platform for sharing and managing Docker containers, LM had no repositories here.

HackerRank State: Still up A coding challenge site; LM had no public activity or submissions here.

Medium State: Still up A blogging platform; no known posts from LM, but the account exists.

And that would be all the profiles I know of so far. As a small reward for making it to the end of this post, here’s a low-quality picture of Luigi showing off his perfect side profile 🙌

#luigi mangione

404 notes · View notes

koyagifs · 4 months ago

Text

𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓸𝓷𝓮: 𝓱𝓪𝓬𝓴𝓮𝓽𝓽's 𝓺𝓾𝓪𝓻𝓻𝔂 𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻!

pairing: poly!ot8 x reader au: werewolf | camp counselors | the quarry genre: angst | horror | fluff (?) word count:5.454k synopsis: summer has now come to end camp counselors ! we ask that you pack up as quickly as possible before the sun goes down. who knows what monsters lie in the dark. warning(s): Minors do not interact! mentions of sexual acts, virgin teasing.

August 22, 25 17:07

જ⁀➴ As the bus disappeared around the bend, the low hum of the engine fading into the distance, an eerie stillness settled over the camp. San lowered his hand, glancing at the others with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Well, that’s it. No more campers. Just us.”

Wooyoung rolled his shoulders, letting out a groan. “Finally. I thought I’d never get a break from pretending I actually enjoy arts and crafts. If I have to look at one more macaroni necklace—”

Yeosang cut him off with a smirk. “You’ll wear it and like it. Admit it, Wooyoung, you teared up when little Jamie gave you that friendship bracelet.”

Wooyoung pointed at Yeosang, mock-indignant, but his movement was a little too quick—betraying the friendship bracelet he had hastily hidden behind his back. “That’s slander. But, yes, I am a style icon, even with pasta accessories. You wouldn’t understand.”

Yn giggled softly, her laugh carrying in the quiet of the empty camp. Her gaze lingered on Wooyoung, fondness evident as she watched her boyfriend continue to defend his pride against Yeosang’s teasing smirk.

San stepped toward her, the keys jingling softly as he pulled them from his pocket. “Alright, lovebirds, save the flirting for later,” he said, quirking a brow at Yn before tossing the keys lightly in the air and catching them again. “We still need to finish checking the grounds before it gets too dark.”

Yn turned her attention to San, raising a brow. “You just don’t want to do it alone, do you?”

San feigned a dramatic gasp, clutching his chest. “Me? Scared? Never. But if you’d prefer to wander into the woods by yourself, be my guest.”

Wooyoung, overhearing, waved a hand dismissively as he continued to bicker with Yeosang. “San’s scared of his own reflection after sunset. Don’t let him fool you.”

San shot him a mock glare, tossing the keys to Yn. “Alright, brave guy, why don’t you take the cart and do the rounds instead?”

Wooyoung immediately faltered, his confidence deflating. “Uh, I mean, I would, but—”

“That’s okay,” Megan cut in smoothly, stepping forward and looping her arm around Yn’s. “I’ll go with Yn. We need to collect our bags anyway, don’t we?”

Yn blinked in surprise but nodded. “Oh, right. We left them by the staff cabin earlier.”

San arched a brow, twirling the keys around his finger. “Convenient excuse, Megan, but sure. Just don’t crash the cart.”

Megan rolled her eyes, tugging Yn toward the cart. “Please. I’ll drive safer than you ever could.” She glanced over her shoulder at the boys, smirking. “Try not to get lost while we’re gone.”

Wooyoung watched them go, his playful bickering forgotten as a faint pout crept onto his face. “I was going to go with her,” he muttered under his breath, earning a chuckle from Yeosang.

“Relax,” Yeosang teased, clapping a hand on Wooyoung’s shoulder. “She’s not running off into the woods forever.”

August 22, 17:30

જ⁀➴ " so, want to tell me how you and Wooyoung ended up together?" Megan asked, a smirk held on her face.

You blushed, tossing the bags onto the golf cart, " we're high school sweethearts actually. I've known the guys since high school actually."

Megan nodded her head, the urge to roll her eyes being nearly impossible. " what about San, do you know if he's single?"

You stifle a laugh, trying not to give away the fact that San is dating you. " it's complicated?"

Megan hummed in acknowledgement, " he was a tough nut to crack. I was trying to have a summer fling, especially since Mr. Kim said that a spot open up."

Your eyes widened slightly, and you shot her a curious glance. "Wait, you were thinking about... with San?"

Megan shrugged nonchalantly, though her smirk suggested she was enjoying watching you squirm just a little. "Well, who wouldn’t? He’s charming, funny, and has that whole mysterious vibe. Thought it’d be a fun distraction, you know? I figured a little summer romance never hurt anyone.” She glanced over at you, gauging your reaction. “But now I’m thinking maybe I’ve got competition, huh?”

You turned away from her, trying to hide the annoyance that was bubbling up inside. "I wouldn't exactly call it competition," you muttered, your voice a little sharper than you intended. You could feel your cheeks flushing, and though you didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of reacting, it was hard not to.

You mumbled, "I’m going to go double check if we left anything," walking away from Megan, hoping some space would help clear your head. Megan didn’t argue; instead, she hummed to herself, watching your figure disappear into the distance. After a moment, you heard her settle back into the golf cart, the engine purring to life as she sat in wait.

You all agreed to hide the relationship within each other. It wasn’t exactly a secret that you were in a poly relationship, but you and the guys had decided to keep it low-key for now. Hongjoong and Mingi had backed out last minute, so the rest of you—Wooyoung, San, Yeosang, Yunho, Jongho, and Seonghwa—had come up with a more… playful way of managing things. The winner of a game of rock, paper, scissors would get to flaunt you as their girlfriend for the time being. It was meant to be lighthearted—nothing serious. But sometimes, it felt more complicated than that, especially when outside eyes started poking around.

You stood still, your gaze locked on the large tree ahead, its twisted bark covered in faded carvings. The remnants of past campers’ expressions of affection—names, dates, and hearts—etched into the rough surface. But one set of initials stood out to you, carving itself into your memory in a way the others didn't.

Jacob + Emma forever

A chill ran down your spine as your eyes lingered on the carving, the words far more unsettling now than they would have been in any other context. It wasn’t just the crude simplicity of the message. It was the weight of the history behind it. This was the same tree where previous campers had left their marks—before the murders, before everything had gone so horribly wrong.

You took a slow, cautious step back, trying to shake off the feeling of dread creeping into your chest. The atmosphere around you had shifted. The once playful atmosphere of the camp now felt heavy, darkened by the eerie presence of the past. The words on the tree had never bothered you before, but now, they felt like a warning.

Suddenly, a rustling sound from behind you made you freeze. You spun around quickly, your heart pounding in your chest. The woods had always been a little unsettling at night, but now, it felt like something—someone—was out there, watching. You strained your ears, trying to catch any movement or sound, but there was nothing. Only the wind whispering through the leaves.

You let out a slow breath, trying to calm yourself. "It’s just the wind," you whispered to yourself, trying to rationalize the feeling of unease. Still, something felt off.

Glancing back at the tree once more, you felt a shiver run through you. You were no longer alone in the woods; the history of this place seemed to weigh down on you, and the feeling of being watched was impossible to ignore. You couldn’t shake the thought that the dark memories of the past were still very much alive, lingering in the shadows of the camp.

You knew you needed to get back to the group—back to safety. But as you turned to head back to the golf cart, the air around you seemed to grow colder, the darkness thicker. It wasn’t just the remnants of a past tragedy that lingered here; it was something more. Something you couldn’t quite put your finger on.

Walking back to the golf cart, you climbed into the driver’s seat, trying to shake off the lingering unease that still clung to you. Megan let out a relieved sigh as she stretched her arms above her head, clearly glad you were back. "Finally, I thought you were going to be out there forever."

You gave her a small, forced smile, trying to keep your tone light. " had to make sure we had everything,"

Megan nodded, her smile wide and eager. "Back to the boys then! I'm so ready to head back home," she said, her voice bubbling with enthusiasm, clearly glad to be done with the strange atmosphere of the camp.

You nodded and started the golf cart, the engine hum filling the quiet between you. The wheels kicked up dust as you steered back toward the others. The flickering shadows of the trees seemed to stretch longer with every passing moment, but you pushed the unease to the back of your mind. You didn’t want to dwell on it, especially not with Megan so carefree beside you.

As you drove, Megan started chatting again, her voice a welcome distraction. "So, about that thing with San," she began, raising an eyebrow at you, "any chance he’s got a soft spot for me after all? I mean, I was thinking of trying my luck, but..." She trailed off, her gaze flicking over to you mischievously.

You groaned inwardly but kept your eyes on the path ahead. "Megan, seriously?"

" what? he's either single or not. I need a good fuck and San looks like he can give that to me,"

You clenched your jaw, trying to keep your expression neutral as you kept your eyes focused ahead. The words Megan had just said stung more than you expected, and you felt a rush of heat flood your cheeks. You knew she was always bold, but hearing her be so direct about San left an uncomfortable pit in your stomach.

"Megan, seriously?" you repeated, this time your tone sharper, betraying your frustration.

She seemed unfazed by your response, her smirk widening as she leaned back in the seat, her eyes gleaming with mischief. "What? I’m just being honest," she said, shrugging. "I need to know if he’s worth my time. You can’t blame me for looking for a little fun, right?"

"That’s… not the kind of conversation I want to have," you muttered, trying to push down the uncomfortable twist in your gut.

Megan raised an eyebrow, clearly still amused by your discomfort. "don't tell me you're a virgin ms. high school sweet heart?"

Your face flushed, the blood rushing to your cheeks as Megan’s words landed like a blow. The teasing tone in her voice only made the situation worse, and you could feel yourself shrinking under her gaze.

You tightened your grip on the steering wheel, trying to focus on the road ahead, but her words echoed in your mind, making your discomfort feel even more pronounced. "Megan, that's none of your business," you snapped, your voice colder than you intended.

Megan let out a light laugh, clearly enjoying the effect her words had on you. "I’m just messing with you," she said, though there was an edge to her voice. "Relax, I didn’t mean anything by it. Just trying to get to know you, that's all."

August 22, 18:01

જ⁀➴Yeosang stuck his tongue out at Wooyoung, a playful grin tugging at his lips as he turned on his phone. The familiar whine of Wooyoung’s voice echoed through the air, clearly frustrated. “Ugh, Yeosang! Seriously? I thought we were past this!”

San chuckled, the sound of his laughter echoing through the camp. He slammed the van’s hood shut with a satisfying thud, wiping his hands on his pants as he turned to face the group. “She looks good to go!” he called out, the pride in his voice unmistakable. “Now we just need Mr. Kim to hand us the keys and for the girls to come back.”

Wooyoung crossed his arms, still giving Yeosang a playful glare. “I swear, I’m going to make you pay for this later.”

Yeosang simply shrugged, not at all bothered by Wooyoung’s mock annoyance. "You wouldn't know what to do with me if you tried," he teased, eyes flicking to the van with a mischievous glint. "Besides, we’ve got everything ready. It’s just a matter of time."

San wiped his hands one last time and nodded toward the small office where Mr. Kim was supposed to hand over the keys. “Yeah, I’ll go grab them in a sec,” he said, his tone easy and casual. "No rush. It’s not like we’ve got anything better to do right now."

The rest of the group was scattered around the camp, most of them hanging near the van or chatting in low voices, waiting for things to be set in motion. You, on the other hand, were still making your way back with Megan, the uneasy feeling from earlier still lingering in your chest. The drive back had been quiet, but now, seeing the group come back into focus, you couldn’t help but feel like there was an unspoken tension among everyone. It was something you couldn’t quite place, but you knew something had shifted.

Megan hopped out of the cart first, waving to the group with a wide grin. "Looks like you all are ready to go," she said, her tone light and casual as she walked toward them.

Yeosang and Wooyoung nodded, their heads both tilting toward her as she approached the group. Yeosang gave her a quick smile, but Wooyoung’s playful expression remained unchanged as he fiddled with his phone, clearly more interested in his screen than anything else at the moment.

San, however, wasn’t as distracted. He noticed you gathering your bags and started walking over toward you, his steps slow and deliberate, almost as if he was giving you some space to handle whatever was on your mind.

You adjusted the straps on your bag and tried to push any lingering unease aside, wanting to focus on the present. But the quiet pressure from earlier—the unease you’d felt during the drive—still pressed on your chest, making everything feel a little heavier than usual.

San placed his hand on your hip, and you couldn’t help but flinch slightly at the sudden contact. The unexpected warmth of his touch made your heart race for a moment, but you quickly relaxed into it, feeling the tension from earlier ease just a bit. There was something about San’s presence that always made you feel grounded, even in moments like this when everything else seemed so uncertain.

He chuckled softly at your reaction, his fingers brushing lightly against your side as he adjusted his grip. "Didn’t mean to startle you," he said, his voice teasing but also gentle. “I’ve got it.” With that, he took your bag from your hands and effortlessly slung it over his shoulder.

You blinked, a little surprised by how smoothly he took charge of the situation. “Thanks,” you murmured, watching him as he stood there for a moment, the weight of your bag clearly no issue for him. His gaze met yours, and for a second, the world seemed to slow down, the noise from the rest of the group fading into the background.

Megan's eyes focused on the interaction between you and San, her gaze sharp as she raised an eyebrow. She then turned to Wooyoung, a teasing smirk tugging at her lips. “San’s a bit touchy with your girlfriend, isn’t he?”

Wooyoung glanced over at you and San, his expression unreadable for a moment, before he shrugged casually. “Yeah, looks like it,” he replied, his tone light but there was an edge to it, something playful but also knowing.

But before Megan could push further, Yeosang stepped in, his voice cool and composed. “But that’s how San is with everyone, nothing unusual.” He reached over and pinched Wooyoung’s side sharply, signaling him to cool it, his eyes narrowing slightly.

Wooyoung let out a quiet yelp at the pinch, giving Yeosang a look of playful annoyance, but he quickly backed off, raising his hands in mock surrender. In one swift motion, Wooyoung rushed to your side, wrapping his arm around your body with a dramatic flourish, pulling you into his side.

The sudden movement caught you off guard, and a surprised squeal slipped from your lips. You turned to give him a playful shove, but his arm was already firmly around you, and the laughter in his eyes made it clear that he was thoroughly enjoying the reaction.

“Gotcha!” Wooyoung said, his voice full of mischief as he grinned down at you. “I knew you’d make the cutest noise.”

You rolled your eyes, though you couldn’t suppress the small laugh that followed. “You’re such a dork,” you muttered, still trying to regain your balance after his unexpected move.

Without the boys noticing, Megan quietly approached the van and popped the hood, her eyes narrowing as she surveyed the engine with a mischievous glint in her eyes. She stood there for a moment, pretending to inspect the engine, all while a playful smirk tugged at her lips.

A small "ah" escaped her lips as her fingers expertly tugged on the rotor arm, removing it from its place with a satisfied look. She held it in her hand like it was some kind of prize, her eyes glinting with mischief as she examined it, clearly pleased with her little sabotage.

what's another night, she thought, a grin spreading across her face as she slipped the rotor arm into her pocket, hiding it away. The thrill of causing just a bit of chaos was too sweet to resist, and besides, they wouldn’t figure it out until they tried to leave. And by then, it would be too late.

She softly shut the van's hood, making sure it clicked shut with a quiet finality. There was no rush—she didn’t need to draw attention to herself. She walked away from the van with an air of nonchalance, her hands tucked casually in her pockets, as if nothing had changed.

The rest of the group was still distracted by their bags and idle chatter, completely unaware of the trouble Megan had just set into motion. Yunho and Seonghwa had now joined the group, laughing and talking as they made their way over to the van. Wooyoung, ever the playful one, hung onto you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he leaned against you with a dramatic sigh.

"Come on, Yn, how much longer do we have to wait before we can head out?" Wooyoung asked, his voice full of exaggerated impatience, though the teasing grin on his face made it clear he was just messing around.

You rolled your eyes, trying to shake him off without much success. "You’re impossible, you know that?" you muttered, laughing despite yourself. “We’re waiting for Mr. Kim to hand us the keys, remember?"

As if on cue, Mr. Kim walked out with a wide smile on his face, his steps light and easy as he approached the group. “What’s going on, Hacketers?” he asked, his voice filled with that familiar cheerfulness that had become almost contagious over the course of the summer.

The group turned to him, all a little relieved that it seemed like the wait was finally over. You could see the tension lift from their shoulders, even as they continued to chatter among themselves. But beneath it all, there was still that underlying tension—like something was just about to tip over, though none of them knew it yet.

Wooyoung was the first to speak up, still draped over you like a human blanket. “Mr. Kim, about time!” he exclaimed dramatically, winking at you as if they’d been waiting forever for this moment. “We were getting antsy here, waiting for you to show up.”

San, looking over at Mr. Kim with his usual relaxed smile, nodded. "Yeah, what's the hold-up? We ready to get out of here?"

Mr. Kim gave a little laugh, raising an eyebrow. “A bit impatient, aren’t we?” He walked over to the front of the van, holding out the keys. “Alright, alright, here you go,” he said, tossing them to Yeosang, who caught them easily.

“Now, don’t go breaking anything on the road,” Mr. Kim added, glancing at the group with a knowing smile before turning to leave. “And remember, no speeding or any funny business. This isn’t a race, you know.”

The group cheered in agreement, the excitement for the drive back building as they began to move toward the van. Yeosang climbed into the driver’s seat, sliding into place with the keys in his hand. He slipped the fob into the ignition, turning it with a quick flick of his wrist. For a moment, there was nothing but the sound of the van’s engine sputtering—groaning, struggling to come to life.

Yeosang furrowed his brows and turned the key again, but this time, the engine only let out a few weak coughs before falling silent again. He glanced at the group, his expression confused but still calm.

"Uh... guys?" Yeosang’s voice was laced with a hint of concern as he tried once more to turn the ignition. Again, nothing happened.

The rest of the group, all leaning against the van or standing nearby, exchanged confused glances. San stepped closer, his usual easy smile fading as he watched Yeosang try again.

"What's going on?" San asked, his voice casual but with a hint of concern creeping in.

Yeosang glanced up at him, his own frustration beginning to show. "It's not turning on..." he replied, shaking the fob in his hand as if trying to will the van to start.

As the group gathered around, a set of footsteps approached from behind. The sound was deliberate, heavy, and filled with a quiet sense of urgency. Mr. Kim’s voice followed soon after, concern thick in his words as he walked toward the van, his eyes scanning the engine.

“What happened? Is there an issue with the van?” Mr. Kim asked, his tone sharp with worry as he glanced at Yeosang and the rest of the group. His eyes flicked over the van as if trying to assess the situation.

The group exchanged looks, all of them feeling the weight of the unexpected trouble. San stepped back slightly, his eyes narrowing. "It just... won’t start," he muttered, clearly baffled. "We drove here just fine, right? I mean, it worked earlier."

Mr. Kim’s face twisted into a frown as he stepped closer to the hood, examining it more carefully. His fingers ran over the engine, checking for any obvious issues. But everything seemed normal, nothing out of place that could explain why the engine wouldn’t start.

"Let me take a look," Mr. Kim said, though there was an edge of frustration in his voice now. He opened the hood and leaned in, peering over the engine like a mechanic assessing a problem.

Yeosang, still holding the keys, tried the ignition again. This time, the van let out a weak sputter but refused to fully start.

"I don’t understand," Yeosang muttered, stepping back in frustration.

Megan, who had been quietly watching the scene unfold, stood slightly apart from the group, her hands clasped behind her back in a seemingly innocent pose. The corner of her mouth twitched, as though she was holding back a smile, but she quickly masked it.

The others were too preoccupied with the van to notice her behavior, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. You turned slightly, catching Megan’s eye for a split second, and you saw the faintest glint of satisfaction in her expression. It was enough to send a chill down your spine.

Mr. Kim, still looking under the hood, sighed. "Something’s definitely wrong," he muttered. "But I don’t see anything major. Looks like the engine’s fine."

Yeosang groaned in frustration. "Then why isn’t it starting?" he asked, looking around as if expecting an answer to fall from the sky.

Mr. Kim let out an annoyed groan, his frustration evident as he slammed the hood of the van shut with a force that made everyone jump. The sound of metal clashing rang through the air, but he didn’t seem to care. He dug into his pocket, the jangle of keys clashing together as he retrieved a set and held them up for everyone to see.

The group stared, confusion spreading through their faces as they watched him. Even Yeosang, who had been trying to figure out the van’s issue, stopped and turned toward Mr. Kim. The sudden shift in the air felt like a signal that things were not going to go as planned.

Megan, standing off to the side with her arms crossed, took a step forward. Her expression remained calm, but there was something in her eyes—something sharp and calculating.

Mr. Kim cleared his throat, looking at the group. “Well, it looks like we’ll be staying here another night. The van’s not going anywhere right now,” he said, his voice tight with annoyance. “I know it’s not ideal, but we’ll get it sorted in the morning.”

The group exchanged uncomfortable glances. No one had expected this, and the weight of the situation settled over everyone like a thick fog.

“That’s fine, Mr. Kim," Megan spoke up, her voice sweet but with an underlying tone that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. She stepped forward, the smile on her lips wide but her eyes cold. “We’ll be fine on our own. Really, you don’t have to worry about us.”

There was something unsettling in her words, the way she dismissed Mr. Kim’s concern so easily. The rest of the group stood frozen, unsure of how to respond.

Mr. Kim paused, glancing at Megan with a furrowed brow. He seemed to hesitate for a moment, his gaze flicking between her and the group. But then, as though dismissing his doubts, he nodded and tucked the keys into his pocket.

“Well… if you’re sure, Megan," he said, his tone softening. “I’ll make sure someone’s here in the morning to look at the van. But remember, stay safe and don’t go off on your own too far.”

Megan’s smile widened, a knowing look in her eyes. “Of course, Mr. Kim. We’ll be fine,” she repeated.

Mr. Kim rubbed his face, clearly exhausted by the turn of events, before he turned to Seonghwa, his expression stern. “You’re in charge, Seonghwa. No one in, and no one out, understood?” His voice carried the weight of authority, the kind of command that brooked no argument.

Seonghwa, who had been standing to the side, straightened up immediately, his posture shifting into something more serious. His usual calm demeanor shifted to something more guarded, as if he understood the full weight of Mr. Kim’s words. “Understood,” Seonghwa replied, his voice steady and unwavering.

Mr. Kim nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer. He took a deep breath and looked over the group one more time, his eyes scanning everyone. “Make sure you all stay inside. Hunting season starts tonight.” His tone was final, a clear signal that whatever was coming, it wasn’t something to take lightly.

The group stood in stunned silence for a moment, processing what he had just said. Hunting season? The words hung in the air, thick with a sense of foreboding that no one could quite shake. Everyone had heard the rumors—the stories of the area being dangerous during certain times of the year, but hearing it from Mr. Kim made it feel all too real.

San was the first to speak up, his voice tense but laced with the same calm he always carried. “Hunting season? What exactly does that mean, Mr. Kim?” His brow furrowed as he glanced around at the others. They were all starting to realize that this wasn’t just some precautionary warning—it was something more.

Mr. Kim’s eyes softened slightly, but the seriousness of his words remained. “It’s exactly what it sounds like. There are things out there. Things you don’t want to cross paths with after dark. Just stay inside, lock the doors, and don’t wander off. I’ll make sure someone checks on you in the morning.”

Seonghwa, standing near the front of the group, gave a firm nod in response to Mr. Kim’s orders, his expression unreadable but clearly resolute. “We’ll stay inside,” he said quietly. “We’ll be fine.”

Mr. Kim gave one last nod, his expression hardening, before he turned and walked toward his truck. The engine roared to life as he revved it, the sound of the truck cutting through the still night air. He drove it closer to the group, parking it near the edge of the campgrounds, ensuring that he could keep an eye on things from a distance.

“I mean it, you guys,” Mr. Kim called out from his truck, his voice louder now, firm and resolute. “Stay inside. No exceptions.”

His eyes scanned the group one last time before he slammed the truck door shut. The heavy rumble of the engine faded as he drove off into the darkened distance, his vehicle disappearing into the night.

The weight of his words hung in the air, settling over everyone like a thick fog. The group stood in silence, the tension palpable, each person processing what had just been said.

Megan’s voice broke the tense silence, her tone almost too light, too playful for the situation. “Well, now that Mr. Kim is gone, let’s have a party!” she said, her words dripping with a mischievous lilt.

Her sudden shift in energy felt jarring against the quiet weight of the night. It was as if she were trying to cut through the tension, but the effect wasn’t exactly comforting. You could see the others’ uneasy glances exchanged, as if they were all weighing whether or not to entertain her.

San, ever the protective figure, gave her a pointed look. “Megan, now’s not really the time for that,” he said, his voice firm. His hand briefly brushed against yours, grounding you as if he could sense your unease.

Yeosang, too, seemed hesitant. He glanced over at Seonghwa, silently seeking reassurance, but when Seonghwa didn’t immediately respond, he gave Megan a cautious smile. “It’s probably not the best idea, Megan. We should stay inside and wait for morning.”

But Megan wasn’t deterred. She put on her signature grin, her eyes glinting with mischief. “Oh, come on. A little fun never hurt anyone. We’re stuck here, might as well make the best of it, right?” She swung her arms dramatically, as if it were all just a game.

Wooyoung’s carefree attitude seemed to slice through the tension, his playful shrug drawing the eyes of the group. "Why not? A last hurrah before we go back home," he said with a grin, his voice light, but there was a glimmer of something darker in his eyes, as if trying to mask his own nerves.

Yunho, ever the easygoing one, nodded along, a mischievous smirk playing at his lips. “Ehh, what’s the harm? I still have some booze from last night anyways,” he added, pulling out a small flask from his jacket pocket and giving it a casual shake.

The suggestion of a party wasn’t exactly what you had in mind, but it was clear the others were leaning into the idea. Yeosang’s eyes darted between the group, his lips pressing into a thin line as he seemed to weigh his options. He looked like he was about to voice his concerns but hesitated, clearly torn.

"Don't look at me like that," Yeosang muttered under his breath, crossing his arms. "You know I can't be the boring one every time."

Megan's excitement was almost contagious, but you could sense the undercurrent of tension still hanging in the air. She bounced on her heels, clearly thrilled by the idea, her grin widening. "Yes! Sannie and I can go look for some snacks!" she exclaimed, turning toward San with a gleam of mischief in her eyes.

Seonghwa’s calm and authoritative voice cut through the chaos of excitement, his small smile reassuring. He looked around at everyone, giving out tasks with precision. “Wooyoung and I will be in charge of getting wood. Yunho and Yeosang, you guys make sure the phones are charged for music. Yn, you and Jongho can go ahead and meet us there.”

You blinked for a moment, taken aback by Seonghwa’s decision to put you with Jongho. It wasn’t like you minded the company, but you hadn’t expected him to pair you with him so suddenly. You gave a quick nod, not wanting to question the plan. Wooyoung quickly came by to place a kiss on your lip.

" see there beautiful!"

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