#could not pay me enough to return to retail now that i have a career outside of retail

[benevolenterrancy]

Ianto in this? And maybe Tosh in a tux to play on Dinner and a Show?

Would love to know what undercover mission requires this get-up and how Ianto drew the short straw

(Owen isn't pictured as he immediately laughed himself sick upon seeing Ianto and had to be sent for a lie down)

[gingersnapwolves]

So now that I've got a good sample size (which said roughly what I expected), I'll further elaborate on this scenario. Here’s the situation.

My dad is rewriting his will because previously it just left everything to my mom, but my mom has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and isn’t in a position to just inherit everything and know what to do with it. My dad has three kids, as follows:

My older brother (49): a software engineer who got into computer programming in the late 90’s, so, just as it was becoming a super awesome job that paid a lot of money. His wife has an equally well paying job. They have two kids. They are extremely well-off. My brother could literally retire today and have enough money for the rest of his life, including sending both his kids to college without school loans. Their home is worth well over a million dollars. Yes, they have worked hard to get where they are. No question.

My older sister (46): a legal biller who is paid fairly well but did not start that job until somewhat late in her life (about 5 years ago), after an exciting history of retail jobs, working at Comcast tech support, and then working for my dad as a medical biller for several years. Single, no kids, owns a condo which sucks.

Me (43): a medical biller who is paid less well because I work at a non-profit. Also only started that job about 5 years ago. The reason for that is because I ran my dad’s medical office for about 13 years. Married (yay!) with no children. Wife also worked for my dad in the front office for over ten years, is now disabled. Over the years, we have been in and out of medical debt due to my wife’s issues. We own a home, the mortgage of which won’t be paid off until I’m seventy lmao.

Point of note: it is not possible to know what my career path would have looked like had I not chosen to work for my dad. I did not do this because I could not get a job of my own (I had one, just disliked it), but because he specifically asked me to do it because he was having difficulties with the staff he had hired. Yes, obviously, he paid me to work for him. I probably could have made more money in another job but I never had an issue with that because I genuinely liked working there and keeping things running smoothly for him. My father was a doctor who owned his own practice and I can say with absolute confidence that it would not have been as successful were it not for me (and for my wife and sister). 

Second point of note: my father has helped all of us with major purchases over our lives. He helped my brother buy his first condo. He bought my sister her first car after the one she inherited from our grandmother died. He gave me a considerable amount of money to use as a down payment on my home. He helped my brother buy their current McMansion. Et cetera. I would say it has been roughly even between the three of us and if we get into dollars and cents, it’s likely my sister who has received the least in monetary assistance from him over the years.

Third point of note: all three of us have always gotten along fairly well with my dad, although he is not super demonstrative in his affection. However, his relationship with my brother has soured of late because they bought the million dollar home together, with the idea that my parents would live with them, help with childcare, et cetera, and in return my brother would help out more as they got older. That … did not happen, and my dad has been very salty about the fact that my brother and his family treated him more like a live-in servant. (My personal opinion is that once you hit seventy years old and help your son buy a million dollar home, you should be exempt from chores, but apparently my brother does not share this opinion.) (At one point my father had cataract surgery and couldn’t do much for a few days afterwards and literally nobody did the dishes. He had to do everyone’s dishes after recovery. Yikes on bikes, but tbh, typical behavior of my brother and his family).

So my position, genuinely, was that the fairest thing to do would be to split things evenly between the three of us. I had always assumed this is what my father would do and had no issues with that. My father is the one who brought up the idea of splitting his estate based on the level of need. Obviously, my need is greatest, and my dad specifically said he wants to be sure I will be okay in my old age, as I have no kids to look after me and only started my retirement fund a few years ago (he didn’t offer a 401K when I worked for him, LOL).

Apparently when he mentioned it to my brother, my brother was vehemently opposed to the idea of splitting the estate based on need and said my sister and I “made our choices”, which made me change my opinion from “my dad should do what’s fair” to “fuck that guy in particular”. 

I still think the “fair” thing to do is split the estate evenly, but now I’m really mad at my brother lol, so my dad told me to think about it for a few days before I give him my opinion. I am well aware that if my dad divides his estate in a way that gives more to me (and/or my sister) it will likely ruin my relationship with my brother (not with my sister who already said she would give me her share if I needed it, which, yes, made me cry). Maybe I should be worried about that but I’m really not (see all hundred of my previous posts about my brother’s insensitive dickery for context).

So yeah. That’s the entire sitch. Still pondering what I should tell my dad, beyond “it’s your will, you can do whatever feels right to you, I won’t be upset either way”.

this is legitimately a question my father asked me yesterday. I'm not going to give a lot of detail because I want everyone's gut reactions - obviously the situation is not super simple but that's the base question!

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

Last week I sent out a Hail Mary application for a job as a library specialist in my old college town, and I fully excepted to be ghosted or sent a form email with the word "unfortunately" in it, but today I was told that I had been selected to move onto the next hiring phase. They want me to come to the library for an interview and a written test, and it pays two dollars more per hour than my current job (if I got a full 40 hours, that'd be $650 or $700 extra per month after taxes). This would literally be a dream come true were it not for the fact that they scheduled my test for this coming Wednesday, August 17th.

Problems:

I am 400 miles away.

I have no car.

I have a job to which I am currently employed and expected to show up on Wednesday.

"To ensure fairness for all candidates, requests for alternate or makeup assessment dates will not be granted."

What do I do? Do I pass this up, or do I throw away everything for a chance at a career. Not even a guaranteed career, just a chance, with who knows how many other applicants vying for the same position. I could quit my current job, take a coach bus up there, crash with my sister for a few days, take the test, and they pick someone else. Then what? It's high risk/high reward, but I'm not a betting man and I can't possibly be the most qualified person for the job (I'm an English major who has exclusively worked retail and customer service since high school).

I'm trying to convince myself it's not worth it to continue, but then why did I apply in the first place?

I want it.

I want it, but it's just as much luck as it is skill, and I can't afford to go for it and fail. If I do this, I either move on to the next phase of my life, OR I wind up stuck at my parents' place for a very, VERY long time. The job I have now is perfect for my mental health because it's easy, low stress, low stakes, and my boss doesn't care what I do in my considerable amount of downtime; I am basically paid to browse tumblr for hours and occasionally answer the phone/door. I'm never gonna find another job like this down in the Keys, it's lightning in a bottle, so if I give it up and don't land the library gig, I'll have to go back to bagging groceries or some shit. I can't do that again. I can't stand for 8 or 9 hours a day. I can't return to the "the customer is always right" mindset when my current boss knows the customer is very often wrong and expects me tell them so. I can't do it. I won't. Certainly not for less than I make now (my job pays well over minimum wage; most jobs down here do not)

My boss is pretty lenient, but I don't think she's lenient enough to give me multiple days off, on such short notice, for the express purpose of finding another job. She wouldn't let me come back after that. I can't unburn that bridge.

I don't know what to do...

[loveislattes]

Patience Is Key (Darkiplier/Fem!Reader) Chapter 1

Commission prompt:  Reader only knows that sex is pain, so Dark shows her otherwise...?

Caution! This story does contain mentions of past borderline-abusive relationship and there is one scene that slightly delves into the situation, but it never goes further than pushing and forced kissing.

This chapter is SFW other than some cursing. The next chapter will be the oh so lovely smutty bit. ^^ Chapter 2 will be out next week! 

“Ah, damn it!” 

The curse left my lips the second I finally registered that I had dropped the extremely large box of pots and pans on my toe, and not on the flat floor as intended. Jerking back, I fell into the rickety wooden chair behind me and pulled my injured foot up into my lap with a wince.

“Why am I such a fucking klutz?!” I wheezed through the pulses of pain. 

It took a few minutes of babying my poor toe but eventually, I managed to soothe away the pain and get back onto my feet. Why was it that toe injuries always felt so much worse than other injuries? As I debated that question, as well as the existential existence of pain at all, I got moving about the sparse kitchen once more. The boxes weren’t going to empty themselves after all and I only had the two days until I started my new job to get it all done. 

“Lord knows if I had to take one more extra day off, it’d be the end of the world,” I muttered under my breath.

Working retail had to be one of the worst career choices in the world. Sadly, it was all I could find for the time being and this new house mortgage, low as it was, wouldn’t pay itself; Not to mention that my savings were meager at best and wouldn’t last long if I had to rely on them, thanks to my problematic ex. 

This house was a blessing in disguise and I definitely couldn’t afford to lose it. A beautiful victorian-style two-story home at only four hundred fifty a month, with no real damage other than cosmetic updates needed? Yeah. It was practically impossible. My first thought was that it had a sordid past, whether drug crime or murder related, but that didn’t seem to be the case thankfully. The owners had inherited it and we’re willing to sell it for a steal just to get rid of it so they didn’t have to pay taxes and insurance. Their loss, my gain, apparently. 

I had gotten so lost in my thoughts about work and the house that I was done moving the last of the boxes before too long. Score one for daydreaming! 

I set about organizing my cabinets next, emptying the boxes one by one until they were all barren and tossed to the back of the room.

“That’s a problem for future-me,” I muttered, running a hand through my hair with a huff, “I guess dinner is next on the list. Never a better time to find out what take out they have around here!”

I meandered into the living room and plopped down on the worn couch, pulling my laptop into my lap. While waiting for the screen to wake up, I grabbed the TV remote from the coffee table and turned it on as well, needing the background noise with how silent the old home was. I’d definitely have to keep an eye on that or else I’d find myself creeped out even without anything happening. A random cartoon filled the large screen and jaunty music spilled from the speakers as the characters conversed. Shrugging, I tossed the remote back down on the table and returned to my laptop.

After logging in, a quick google search led me to a page full of restaurants both familiar and new to me. Moving to a big city definitely had its perks! 

“Now the question is which one,” I sighed. 

It took a few minutes of debating but I finally settled on ordering from a highly rated Chinese restaurant across town. I was promised my food in about twenty-five minutes and a delivery tracker popped up on the screen right after.

“That’s nifty!”

Setting the laptop back onto the table with the dimmed screen facing my direction, I let myself be pulled into the ridiculous antics of the cartoon characters on TV until a commercial came on. My eyes instinctively drifted over to the laptop to check on the tracker. The red line was about halfway across, indicating they would be leaving the store soon. Nice! Unfortunately, I also caught my reflection on the screen and couldn’t help but take a moment to fix my hair out of reflex. As I adjusted my top to look less wrinkled, I suddenly noticed a black shape in the background, near what would be the corner of the room behind the couch. I froze, heart pounding in my throat as my eyes widened.

“No way,” I whispered. 

Leaning in closer, I focused on the shadow. Too afraid to actually turn around and look, I hoped I could debunk it from this angle alone. I was just about convinced it was actually a part of the LCD going out in that one spot- when suddenly it moved!

“FUCK!”

An uncontrollable screech left my lips as I leaped up from the couch. Spinning to face the shadow, I reflexively snagged up the throw pillow on the couch and tossed it full force in that direction while trying to move away. Unfortunately, I forgot exactly where I was standing in the new layout and the fact that the table was behind me. I was reminded painfully of that fact as my calf muscle slammed hard into the solid wood and I went careening backward. I frantically tried to catch myself but only succeeded in slamming my elbow into the edge of the table and whacking my fingers against the floor in a way that made me see stars.  

Tears pricked behind my eyelids as I hissed through the urge to cry. I was about to lie in a puddle of agonizing defeat until I remembered the whole reason I fell. With a curse, I rolled over to my hands and knees, panting as I looked toward the offending part of the room. There was nothing there. No shadow and no reason I should have ever seen one there; no coat rack, no bookshelf, nothing. Just a bare wall. 

“What the hell was that?!” I groaned.

Now that there was no impending, visible, threat, I spent a good few minutes taking all my injuries into account. Sore calf, elbow, and fingers. Bruises were likely in each spot, unfortunately. Thankfully it didn’t get any worse than that. With my luck, I was surprised I didn’t crack my head open on the floor instead. It was with a heavy, defeated sigh, that I succumbed to the need to lay flat on the floor and catch my breath. 

“I’m losing it. That has to be it. All the stress of the move and being alone just got to me,” I assured myself quietly. 

I wasn’t sure how long I wallowed there in self-pity, but it couldn’t have been as long as it felt because I was soon roused by the sound of someone knocking at the door.

“Foooood!” 

Collecting my fallen pride and battle wounds, I scrambled up off the floor and rushed to the front door, snagging my wallet from my purse on the way. The delivery driver was nice enough and we made small talk as we exchanged food and money. I thanked him after he mentioned their loyalty program then shut the door before hesitantly making my way back into the living room. As I scanned the rather empty space, I was relieved to find it just as it was before; no shadows in sight. 

“I’m probably gonna have nightmares from that shit too,” I muttered, plopping onto the couch and popping open the box.

With a little shake of my head to clear my thoughts, I returned to the show and let the thoughts from the day slowly melt away with every mouth full of delicious food. 

…

It took two months of living in the new house to finally feel more at home. Most everything was put away and decorations filled the walls, warming up the once empty and creepy place. I no longer felt like an uncomfortably unwelcome stranger. The thought of that shadow did, unfortunately, still linger in the back of my mind every night though. I’d be fine all day until it was nighttime and dark in the house. Once the sun was down, it was like my gorgeous home was a totally different place. I didn’t see that moving shadow anymore, but I swore I saw things out of the corner of my eye and it constantly felt like I wasn’t alone. 

One particularly rough night left me searching the entire house for hidden cameras and trapped doors because I could have sworn I was being watched. Of course, I found nothing of the sort, but it didn’t lessen the fear by much. I even started making myself go to bed earlier than usual just to avoid being alone with my paranoid thoughts. Something had to give before I went crazy! 

I was even to the point of considering making new friends; Something to break up the monotony and constant feeling of being alone. Maybe inviting another person into the house would make the eerie feeling go away? One could hope! I wasn’t in the habit of bringing home people, due to my ex, but it was getting to the point where it might be necessary. A person could only take so much alone time!

A rapid knocking on my door tore me out of my lonely thoughts and back to reality with a jolt.

“Who could that be?” I muttered under my breath.

I hadn’t ordered any food and I was pretty sure I hadn’t ordered anything off Amazon recently. Uncurling from my nest of blankets, I hastened to the front door when the visitor knocked again. Impatient buggers weren’t they?

“I’m coming!”

Without thinking to check the peephole first, I pulled the door open and instantly recognized the horrible mistake I had made. I tried slamming the door shut before he could enter but already I was too weak with fear; simply seeing his menacing face leaving me powerless. He was easily able to catch the wood and shove his way in as if I weren’t even there. 

“Heeeey baby.”

I wasn’t even given a breath’s moment to respond. Instantly his hands were on my shoulders and I was slammed into the wall. Pain exploded through my skull and my knees weakened dangerously as I struggled through frustration and fear. 

“You thought ya could just move away and I wouldn’t find ya, baby? Ya outta know better’n that.”

The familiar sensation of bile rose in my throat when his lips smacked against mine. It took all of my resolves to hold it down. It would only add insult to my injury because he wouldn't give a damn and I’d be left worse for wear.

“Aw, come on. Play nice with me, won’t cha? It’s been far too long since I’ve seen ya.”

All I could manage was a timid shake of my head.

Fuck, it was like this any time he was around! Just being in his presence made the littlest of movements hard, like my body just instinctively gave up to avoid more trouble even though my heart told me to fight. If I could fight back, he’d probably back off after a while but I just couldn’t. Flashes of the times he tried to force himself on me, drunk and belligerent, held me back from it. Giving in was just easier, safer, in the long run.

I felt the numbing sensation of acceptance slide through my muscles when his mouth pressed on mine again. Disgust and hatred bubbled in my gut; not only for him but also for myself. So weak, pathetic.

Out of nowhere, the deafening sound of doors slamming rang through the air, causing us both to jump apart. With a Yelp, I clapped my hands over my ears to block out the painful noise as I looked around in shock for the source. To my utter disbelief, I found the cause to my cabinet doors, opening and shutting at breakneck speed. It only lasted for about half a minute before suddenly they stopped, just as abruptly as they had started. My astonishment was cut short by a cry from across the room. 

Having abandoned his pursuit, my ex now stood frozen near the door, ashen white and shaking. Upon closer inspection, I thought I could see a faint shadow around his throat but my line of vision was disrupted when he turned and rocketed out the door. Once the entryway was clear, the door shut calmly behind him. 

It was deadly quiet in the aftermath of whatever the hell happened. The sounds of my heavy breath were the only noises in the air. Scared, but thankful, I hesitantly surveyed the kitchen and the living room for any sign of what had caused the disruption. There was nothing, of course. Not even a hint of the shadow I had spotted months ago. 

Letting out a nervous sigh, I ran a hand through my hair and said, “Thank you… whoever you are."

I didn’t wait for a response before high tailing it to my room and diving under my fluffy comforter, torn between calling my mom or crying until I fell asleep. My body made the decision for me before I could contemplate it for long, shutting down and passing out quicker than anticipated. 

When I woke, it was dark in the room. The radio clock beside my bed read an irritating one thirty am. Despite having slept for six hours, I felt like I hadn’t slept a wink; nightmares resounding in my head like sirens the entire time. 

Rather than trying to force myself back to sleep, I slipped out of the bed, determined to get some hot tea or cocoa to help soothe my inner demons. Unfortunately, I spotted my reflection in my vanity mirror on the way by and I felt compelled to stop. My usually glowing skin looked pallor and lifeless and the bags under my eyes gave the same sentiment.

“Fucking hell,” I muttered, pulling at my bedhead locks in frustration, “I’m not gonna recover from this.”

My outside reflection was only a sliver of the mess that was inside my mind though. And I knew I would get over it in the long run but it always felt so impossible at the start. I just had to turn the sadness into anger. My thoughts were derailed by the sudden feeling of eyes on my back; That familiar itching sensation of being watched sending shivers down my spine. I didn’t see anything in the room around me but when I finally turned back to the mirror I spotted it; an eerily familiar shadow. It was only moments before there was a man suddenly standing behind me in the reflection. 

Although my mouth moved, trying to scream or make any sort of sound, nothing would come out. Scads of questions bombarded my already frazzled sense of sanity as I tried to scream until eventually a worrying sense of calm washed over me in place of the stilted panic.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he assured me as if reading my mind.

The low timbre of his voice made the rational part of my brain melt but the way it reverberated around the room sent my hairs standing on end. My body instinctively went stiff and still as his arms reached around my sides. Cool fingers rested on my forearms and slowly rubbed the goosebumps away in a soothing manner while he stepped closer. I could hardly meet his eyes in the reflection without feeling as if I were staring a predator head-on.

“How did you get in here?” I finally managed to ask. 

An absolutely devastatingly handsome smirk curled up his lips before he flashed large, sharp, pearly whites down at me. 

Oooh fuck, those were some pointy fangs. 

“I’ve been here the entire time, darling. You’re the one who barged in rather abruptly when you decided to move in.”

I began to question my sanity once more as his form slowly lost color and brightness in the mirror, becoming a barely distinguishable shadow behind me. Though his touch on my skin never diminished, to the eye he was nearly invisible. Just as gradually, he filtered back into view. 

His reasoning was lost to me as I tried to figure out just what was going on until eventually, it clicked.

“You’re the mother fucking shadow that has been driving me insane, aren’t you?!” I shouted, jerking out of his reach and spinning to face him, “Just how in the hell did you do that? Why have you been scaring me? What-”

His hand came up swiftly and I froze immediately, only able to watch as he cupped my jaw. A whimper reflexively slipped out as his thumb pressed against my lips. 

“To answer your questions in order: Yes, I am. Shifting is just one of my many abilities. I have not meant to scare you, well, not these last few weeks anyhow. I’ve become- let’s call it- fascinated. Most would have left by now and yet here you stand, heels dug in like a stubborn mule. You’re intriguing.”

The moment he released his hold, I found myself asking, “What are you?”

“What do you think I am?” he retorted, stepping back and slipping his hands into his pockets.

I simply shrugged. How should I know? Before now, I didn’t believe in anything supernatural, but now I was questioning that stance.  

“A demon? A ghost?” I replied.

He hummed momentarily before cocking his head to the side, eyes narrowing as they burned into mine. 

“Does that scare you?”

So many freaking questions! I scrubbed a hand over my face wearily before slapping my palms against my thighs and mentally admitting defeat.

“Unless you’re going to kill me, no. You were terrifying in that shadow form but now that I’ve seen you face to face, I’m not so scared. Don’t get me wrong, I have a healthy respect for you but it’s also comforting to see that you’re not some decayed-looking ghost who is going to warp my face by looking me in the eyes,” I hesitated as another realization hit me hard then carefully added, “Not to mention, I’m pretty sure you’re what saved my ass earlier… right?”

There was a flurry of emotions across his face as his brows knitted together before he seemed to relax some and amusement showed at last. 

“You are just full of surprises, aren’t you?”

I shrugged in response before finally slipping past him to sit on the bed, the shakiness of my legs becoming too much to bear. I could put on a brave face but my body could give way any second. I had been through too much in the last twenty-four hours. Once seated and more comfortable, I met his gaze again. 

“Am I right? Were you the one that scared him away?”

He hummed and tilted his head once in a positive indication before adding, “Luckily for him, he’s as cowardly and self-concerned as most of you humans. Had that not have worked, I would have been forced to take further measures.”

The way his echo deepened and his fangs flashed in an animalistic snarl sent more goosebumps up my arms and neck. Fucking hell. My emotions were having a hard time keeping up through it all; enamored by his good looks, terrified by his powerful aura, curious about his existence. He was, simply put, overwhelming. 

If it wasn’t for his discoloration, echoing voice, and the fangs, he’d seem like any ordinary human. A very attractive human at that… I had to stop that train of thought right there! I’d be just like me and my horrible taste in men to get a crush on the ghost- demon- thing.

“So, um, you said you were here before me. Are you stuck here, like a ghost or something?” I managed to ask while rubbing my goosebumps away. 

“No. This is merely a residence of convenience. Your closet holds a portal to my realm and it’s the simplest way in and out for me. I choose to stay here when I must remain in the human world for any amount of time. You’re the first person to live here in decades.”

I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest in bewilderment when he suddenly moved towards the bed at an inhuman speed. A reflexive flinch had me jerking away when he reached out for me but he was quicker, hand snagging my chin to keep my gaze solely on him.

“Your turn to answer a question for me,” he stated without giving any room for argument, “Who was that man from before, and what is his concern with you?”

Eyeing him warily, I chewed on my lip then answered honestly, “My ex. I wouldn’t say he’s necessarily concerned about me. More so he’s concerned about losing his control over me. He was borderline obsessive and abusive.”

“Do you foresee him being a problem in the future?”

That was a hell of a question. Would he be back? I didn’t even really consider that after how fast he’d run away before but it was always a possibility.

“I honestly don’t know. I guess I should invest in some ADT or something, huh?” I half-assed joked, forcing on a weak smile.

The flat line of his lips told me that he didn’t find my statement as funny as I did. However he did, at last, relinquish his hold on me. 

“I will not stand for a brain dead ape damaging my property. If he comes back, he will be taken care of once and for all.”

Some little devious part of my mind dared to question if he was actually talking about the house, or if he was subtly making a claim over me. The domineering air around him made it seem like a slight possibility. I felt the heat flare over my cheeks before I could stop it and quickly wrapped my arms around my chest defensively before sinking back further onto the bed.

As if a private moment were suddenly disrupted, he cleared his throat loudly and stepped back while adjusting his suit jacket.

“I need to be going. It was nice to officially meet you. If it sits well with you, I will be more prominent around the house since I no longer need to avoid you.”

I nodded and awkwardly replied, “Yeah, er, that’s fine. I mean, it’s more your home than mine anyway, right?”

He made a noise of agreement then turned toward the closet, but stopped with his hand on the doorknob. There was an indescribable expression on his face when he turned back; the whites of his eyes darker than before. 

A smirk that could only be read as cruel crossed his lips and he said, “You may call me Dark. If he comes back when I’m not here, simply ask for me and I’ll be here.”

[adverb-slut]

To Be Human (Fanfiction) Part 4/?

I know I said that every chapter would begin with a Celestial Realm Michael scene, but as I was writing this fast (totally forgot to update my fics), I couldn't think of a good scene to write, so, unfortunately, I shall skip this chapter's initial Celestial Realm scene; I apologize!  As per the usual, this chapter is available on AO3 here!

Title:

To Be Human

Summary:

When a mysterious force attacks the Devildom and destroys it, the brothers are forced to turn to their Father in the Celestial Realm for answers and assistance. However, the Almighty is still miffed at the seven due to their involvement in the Great Celestial War, and sends them to seek asylum in the one place they have yet to make their mark—the Human World.

Without the help of their beloved MC, the brothers must learn to assimilate into this strange new world, all while trying to figure out who is responsible for the destruction of the Devildom and take back their home.

Rating:

T

Word Count:

3446

Previous Chapter:

Read Chapter 3 here!

-

Satan raised his eyebrow at the establishment before them.  “Wal-Mart,” he read aloud. 

“You think it’s like the old War-Mart retail chain back in the Devildom?” Belphie wondered.

Satan stroked his chin.  If this store was anything like the store at home, it would be an adequate location in which to shop for groceries, especially on a budget as they were forced to do now.  As the seven brothers had originally been dubbed the “Seven Rulers of Hell” and were very wealthy, they never had a need to frequent War-Mart, but Satan had heard of the store from one of his less-fortunate friends.

He nodded.  “I believe so.”  It wasn’t as if they had any other choice; Belphie and he had wandered the streets within a mile-radius from their new home, and this was the only store that they had seen.  “Let’s go in.”

Belphegor followed his brother, grumbling under his breath, “It’s just like Lucifer to put us two on shopping duty.”

He raised an eyebrow.  “I’d rather be out here shopping than cooped inside that hovel with the others.”

“I guess.”  Belphie shrugged.  “You have the grocery list, right?”  He pat his pockets.  “I have the debit card from Simeon.”

Satan bobbed his head.  “Yes.”  He unfurled the paper in his hand and read aloud the angel’s loopy handwriting, “Here are some economical foods from the Human World I’d thought you’d like!”  Underneath were written about forty different items, twenty-five of which Lucifer had taken the liberty of circling in red, for they were foods that were also found in the Devildom. 

As the pair walked into Wal-Mart, Satan did a double-take.  Humans flooded every corner of the store, pushing around metal carts piled high with not just foodstuffs, but other household items, as well.  He raised an eyebrow as several people stopped to stare at the two demons who stood in the entryway.  

Belphegor leaned closer to him and whispered out of the corner of his mouth, “Satan … why are they staring at us?”

He remembered their new human names and hissed, “Call me,” he gagged, “Nathan.  And I don’t know … ‘Eigh.’”

“Don’t call me ‘Eigh,’” Belphie snapped back.  He turned to the left to scan the various products that sat at the entryway to immediately grab customers’ attention.  His eyes lingered on a box of toilet paper, reading the brand name.  “Call me ��Scott.’”

Satan wrinkled his nose at the name, intent on chastising his brother for such an idiotic choice, but before he could say a word, the brothers’ attention was diverted by the sound of a camera flash.  Their heads whipped in the direction of the noise, and they stared accusingly at the culprit, who gave herself away with her raised phone.  

“Damn it,” the woman cursed, pocketing her phone and hurrying away.  “Forgot to turn off the ringer.”

With this, a crowd began to form in front of the demons—a crowd who whispered furiously amongst themselves loudly, saying “They’re so hot—they must be celebrities!” and “I swear that I’ve seen them on TikTok before!” and “I wanna take a picture with them and post it on Instagram!” Someone even ventured to mutter, “Wonder if they’d be interested in a threesome …”

“Belphegor,” Satan muttered under his breath, momentarily forgetting his brother’s human pseudonym, “we can’t shop here.”

“What choice do we have?” Belphie replied, backing away as the crowd drew closer and closer.  “There are no other stores around.”

Satan pursed his lips as more people began to whip out their phones and snap pictures of the handsome duo.  Getting photographed was not in their definition of “lying low,” and although he knew that this debacle would piss his eldest brother off to no end, the idea of self-preservation quelled even his most devious side.  “We have to put a stop to this.”

“You don’t think we should use our powers, do you?” Belphegor asked.  

“And cause this to be an even bigger scene than it already is?” demanded Satan.  He raised an eyebrow.  “No.  I have an idea.  Just play along.”  He gagged inwardly at the thought that had taken formation in his mind, but he knew it had to be done if he and Belphie were to shop in peace.  Satan puckered his lips, closed his eyes, and leaned toward the seventhborn demon.  

“Sat—Nathan, what’re you—” was all Belphie could ask before his lips met his brother’s.

Satan could feel his mouth fill with bile (He!  Was!  Kissing!  His!  Brother!  How!  Disgusting!), but he swallowed it down as he saw from the corner of his eye that the crowd began to yell shouts of aversion and start to disperse.  Some of the teenage girls stayed to ogle at the “scandalous” PDA and video-record the scene before they were yanked away by what he could only assume were their small-minded parents.  

As soon as he saw that the group had gone, he ripped his lips off of Belphie, scrubbing them voraciously with his forearm, while Belphegor dry heaved several times and covered his mouth.

“That was disgusting,” Belphie decided.  He scowled at his brother.  “Never do that again.”

Satan reassured, “I don’t plan to.  And besides, at least we got everyone to leave.”  He revealed the crumpled grocery list in his hand.  “Now we can shop peacefully.”

Belphegor continued to mutter obscenities under his breath as he followed Satan to get a cart. 

The fourthborn scanned the grocery list as he pushed the cart down the aisle.  They had five hundred American dollars to spend on food and they had to buy enough to satiate all seven brothers, including the gluttonous Beel; they had to be economical.  The first item on the list that Simeon had given them was “apples,” so Satan reached for a bag of the cheapest kind and placed it into the cart.

“Lucifer likes apples, doesn’t he?” mused Belphie.  

Satan nodded.  “His favorite food are Princess’ Poison Apples.”

Belphie smiled strangely and lifted the bag of apples out and threw them back on the shelf.  “I’m going to guess he wouldn’t be too happy if we came home without his favorite food.” 

Satan raised an eyebrow.  “In case you forgot, I like apples, too; apple pie is my favorite, but … I suppose I’ll make a sacrifice this once.”  He rubbed his chin pensively.  “And that gives me an idea.”  He showed the list to Belphie and nodded, smirking.  “Let’s use this opportunity to torture Lucifer and skip everything on this list that we think he’d like.”

“Sounds like a plan.” 

-

Meanwhile, Lucifer scanned the list of prospective jobs that Simeon had given him.  

The angel had warned them that since none of the demons had college degrees, it might be harder for them to get any “serious” jobs—therefore, most of the jobs on the list simply called for “unskilled labor.”  Perusing the list caused Lucifer to wonder what humans considered “unskilled” for all of the possible jobs on the sheet still seemed to require prodigious talent and dedication.  

He had already marked that he would work at the local War-Mart—although in the Human World it was called “Wal-Mart—” and he figured that Satan would like to work at the Cedar Bridge Public Library.  Levi, who had whined himself to sleep when he found out that there were no Ruri-chan merchandise stores nearby, had already called working at GameStop, hoping that his salary would allow him to finally buy a gaming computer to use instead of the ancient laptop that had come along with the house.  Lucifer had no idea what kind of job would be fit for Belphegor, so he decided to hold off on choosing something for him until he returned from shopping with Satan.  

That left Mammon, Asmo, and Beel’s prospective careers to look into.

… And therein lie the headache.

“Beel, you can’t work at any kind of establishment that serves food,” repeated Lucifer, holding the bridge of his nose.  “Maybe in the Devildom it was okay for you to constantly munch on the food being served—no one would reprimand you because you were one of the Seven Rulers of Hell, but you can’t do that here.”  He stared at the sixthborn demon firmly.  “I will not have you work anywhere near food since I can’t trust you not to give in to temptation.”

“Yeah,” Mammon agreed, shrugging.  “If ya eat any of the food, they’ll prob’ly make you pay for it, and y’know we’re broke as fuck up here.”

Beelzebub twiddled his fingers, looking down.  “Fine, I won’t take the McDonald’s job, then.”  He peered over Lucifer’s shoulder at the sheet.  “Or the Wendy’s job.  Or the Chick-fil-a one.  Or the one at Burger King.”

“Wow, it seems that Simeon marked a lot of these jobs as ‘foodservice,’” Asmo observed.  He smiled.  “Good thing my job has nothing to do with it!”  He poked his chin cutely.  “Although I suppose they serve food sometimes in strip clubs.”

Another headache.

“Asmodeus,” Lucifer bellowed, staring at the fifthborn.  “I already told you: you are not going to become a stripper.  That’s final.”

Asmo frowned and held up a fist.  “What is your problem, Lucifer?  I’ve done it before in the Devildom tons of times.”

The other demons raised an eyebrow at “tons of times,” and Lucifer rolled his eyes.  “You can strip as much as you want in the Devildom; it’s not frowned upon there, but Simeon expressly told me that it is here.  We are not going to be known as the family where one of the members is a stripper.  Think of all the negative attention it’ll draw.”

“That’s bullshit!” Asmo growled.  A black miasma began to surround the fifthborn.  Horns started to sprout out of his head and wings burst forth out of his back.  But before his demon transformation was complete, Mammon put his hands on his shoulders and gave him a good shake.

“Calm down, ya idiot!  You can’t transform here of all places.  People’ll see us through the windows!”  Mammon gestured toward Beel, who rushed to cover the closest window with his large form, for the brothers had yet to purchase any curtains.  He wrestled off Asmo’s arms as the younger demon tried to shove him off and said, “Come on.  I’m plannin’ on going into modeling down here like I did in the Devildom.  You like that kinda thing don’t ya?  We can both do it, y’know.”

Asmo glared at Mammon, finally succeeding in ripping his hands off of his shoulders.  He wheeled toward Lucifer.  “And that’s another thing!  How come you’re okay with Mammon going into something as prestigious as modeling, which will no doubt draw attention, but you’re worried about the attention I’ll bring if I become a stripper?”

Lucifer massaged his temple.  This actually was the first he was hearing of Mammon’s interest in Human World modeling, but he supposed that it was an appropriate career path for him, for looking pretty was one of the secondborn’s least annoying skills.  

“The difference is,” Lucifer began, “that here, modeling convoys positive attention while stripping brings the opposite, for humans are small-minded, as you are aware.  While I’d rather draw as little attention as possible, I can see where that could be seen as suspicious, so positive attention is all I’ll condone.”  He turned toward Mammon and nodded.  “But yes, both of you feel free to take up a modeling job.”

“On Simeon’s list here, it says that there’s only one position that they're looking to fill in the modeling agency he recommended,” Beelzebub observed, reading off the prospective jobs.  

Mammon and Asmo exchanged glances, before simultaneously shouting, “I’ll take it!”

“People will actually want to see my beautiful face instead of your ugly mug!” Asmodeus yelled.

“Oh, yeah?  Well, I ain’t got no other talents ‘sides modeling, so I actually need this job!” Mammon yelled back.

His fervor never waning, Asmo spat, “You have other talents!”

“No, I don’t!” 

“You’re a very talented individual, Mammon!”

“Yeah, well, so are you!”

“You should take the modeling job!”

“Nah, you do it!”

Lucifer sighed at the pair, whose voices rose with every sentence.  He held the bridge of his nose, as he said, “You both can call the number for the modeling agency and see which one of you two they like better.  We’ll find another job for whoever doesn’t end up getting it.”  

He was also going to have to call to see if he could get jobs for his other brothers and himself, and Simeon had graciously provided numbers for them to call.  However … there was still the matter of figuring out if the Celestial Realm had tapped their phones and were also looking through their Internet searches.  To mitigate any trouble, Lucifer had forbidden anyone from using the phone or laptop until they could get solid information regarding the issue, unless it was for something important, like getting a job.

Speaking of jobs, he realized that now with Mammon and Asmo battling on who would be the model of the family, that left Beel (and Belphie) in dire need of work. 

He turned toward the sixthborn.  “Any idea of a non-food-related job, Beel?” 

“I don’t think so …” Beel muttered, still perusing through Simeon’s list of jobs.  He raised an eyebrow a moment later.  “Wait … it says here that there are some people close by looking for tutors in basic math for their kids.  You think I should do that?”

Lucifer nodded.  “Good idea.  Give them a call later, actually—I’m sure Belphie won’t mind doing that job, too, provided he’s doing it with you—see if they’d be willing to hire two tutors.”

Beel nodded obediently.  “So, I guess that’s it.  Everyone has a job, now.”

“Yeah.  Problem is,” realized Mammon, “that all of you guys who work close by have it easy.  Then there’s some of us who’ve gotta find a way to hitch a ride to our jobs.”

Asmo pursed his lips.  “He’s right.  We don’t have a car, not to mention licenses to drive.” 

Lucifer sunk into one of the understuffed dining room chairs, running a hand through his hair.  “One problem at a time, Asmo.  One problem at a time.”

-

“I just wanna say,” Mammon announced, twirling a limp spaghetti noodle on his fork, “I think I understand why Solomon’s food tastes like crap.”  He dropped his utensil back onto his chipped plate.  “‘Cause all Human World food tastes like crap!”

Leviathan, who had just been relieved from his Ruri-chan-filled dreams a few moments ago, blinked sleepily and said, “MC was from the Human World and made good food.”

“Maybe stop criticizing my cooking and just eat your dinner,” Lucifer snapped.  

He blithely spun his noodles across the plate, secretly admitting that the Human World fare of spaghetti and tomato sauce that he had prepared for dinner paled in comparison to their usual supper courses of Scorpion Thermidor and Havoc Devil Crown Roast.  In his defense, he had never prepared meals with food from this world and had just used the recipe on the back of the box of bargain-bin spaghetti that Satan and Belphie had brought home.

Beelzebub grinned, eating his pasta straight from the massive stockpot that the Junior Guardian Angels had magnanimously purchased for them.  The other brothers had already taken their servings and the remaining thirty-two were left for Beel.  “I think you made a really tasty meal considering you just used two ingredients.”  

“There’s no seasoning,” complained Asmo.  “And it's not even pretty enough to post online.”

Lucifer raised an eyebrow in irritation.  “You can always go to bed without dinner.”

“And you’d miss dessert!” Beel gasped.  “Although … there’d be more for me, then.”

“Speakin’ of dessert,” Mammon said, “what’re we havin’?”

Lucifer grimaced.  He had been intent on trying to make an apple pie, but since some demons had thought it funny to not bring home any apples, he’d been forced to be a little more … creative, thinking carefully of foods that the two mischief-makers despised to incorporate into the dessert. 

“We don’t have a large variety of ingredients to work with, so I modified a simple Devildom recipe for venom-infused vanilla mousse and made White Chocolate Mousse with white chocolate, heavy cream, and sugar.”  He looked directly at Satan and Belphie as he said this, for it was no secret that the pair didn’t take a liking to oversweet desserts.

Belphegor blanched at the statement, and Satan frowned, snapping, “That sounds completely unpalatable.”

All Lucifer could do was smirk as he went back to the miniature kitchen to get the mousse from the fridge.  He passed out the dessert, and turned to Mammon, saying, “Hearing you speak of Solomon earlier got me thinking on whether or not we should contact him.  I know I said not to bother MC while we’re in the Human World for their own protection, but Solomon’s a sorcerer, so perhaps he could be of service.”

“Yeah, he might even be able to help us figure out how information was stolen from Father’s omniscience,” added Leviathan, gagging as the mousse slid down his throat because frankly, Lucifer was not an exceptional chef.

Lucifer, who noticed this, mentally vowed to put Levi on cooking duty next for his insolence.  “Asmo, you were the one closest to Solomon.  Have you any means to contact him?”

“Ever since the exchange program ended, we kind of fell out of touch,” the fifthborn admitted sadly, shaking his head.  He tapped his chin.  “I think I remember his number, though.”

Lucifer grimaced.  He really didn’t want to use the phone unless it was absolutely necessary, but Solomon seemed to be their best bet in unraveling this mystery regarding their Father.  “Call him then.  Put him on speaker.”

Picking up his cup of mousse, Asmo meandered over to the landline.  He picked up the phone and clicked the speaker button, which was covered in a layer of dust, for he was the first of the brothers to use the phone in the Human World.  To their surprise, there was no dial tone and an automated female voice spoke out from the device.

“Welcome to the Celestial Realm Cellular Service and Internet Provider, ” the voice said.  “This machine is preloaded with three contact numbers by Simeon the Gatekeeper for your convenience.  If you would like to hear them, press one.  If you would like to dial a different number, press two.  If you would like to speak to His Majesty, the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the Great I Am, the Good Shepherd—”

“Sorry, I just pressed one,” Asmo said, rolling his eyes.  “She didn’t sound like she was going to stop listing titles any time soon.”

“The three contacts saved to your device are as follows: press one if you would like to call Simeon the Gatekeeper, press two if you would like to call Luke the Junior Guardian Angel, press three if you would like to call his Imperial Majesty, King Solomon of Israel.”

Lucifer did a double-take.  It couldn’t be … could it?  Could that Solomon that visited the Devildom be the one and the same King Solomon, the wisest man who ever lived, from the Bible?  He shook his head to clear it of such foolish thoughts … it had been millennia since King Solomon had ruled over ancient Israel, and the exchange student Solomon was a youthful young man.  

“Wait a second—that can’t be our Solomon, can it?” asked Mammon, echoing Lucifer’s thoughts.  “I haven’t read the Bible in like, three thousand years, but I’m pretty damn sure that King Solomon died a long time ago.”

The group was silent for a moment before Satan snapped his fingers, his eyes widening.  “The pacts.”

“What about them?”  asked Belphegor.  

Satan rubbed his chin thoughtfully.  “We know the exchange student Solomon made hundreds and hundreds of pacts with demons.  Isn’t it possible that that was the same Solomon from the Bible, only he’s retained his youthful looks and even gained immortality, perhaps, with the aid of demons?”

“Only one way to find out, I suppose.”  Asmodeus shrugged.  He pressed the number three on the keypad.  

“Calling his Imperial Majesty, King Solomon of Israel,” the automated voice chirped. 

Lucifer’s blood ran cold as the phone rang for a mere two seconds before a voice flooded the room.  

“May I ask who this is?” Solomon’s voice was overlaid with static, but the brothers could still very much recognize the low baritone of the former exchange student.  

“So Solomon really is King Solomon from the Bible,” Levi gasped.  “Roll infinity for ‘Did Not See That Coming.’”  

[findingbxlance]

I love The Sims. 

Which is why I will never stop being disappointed in TS4. 

Lets do some math, and I’m going to keep this mainly between TS3 & TS4. While I did play TS2, there isn’t a lot of information readily available on what the games themselves cost at the time of release. I have some information on that, but I’m not sure if it’s 100% accurate as I was baby when they came out and my mom had to buy them for me. I’ll release it later if anyone is curious. 

TS3 launched with a base game priced at $49.99, and throughout it’s lifetime accrued nine stuff packs at $19.99 each, and eleven expansion packs priced at $39.99 a pop. This comes to a total of $669.79. 

TS4 launched with a base game price of $59.99 (that price soon dropped to $49.99 because the backlash was immediate), and introduced the new game pack. In total (as of 4/15/2020), TS4 has sixteen stuff packs at $9.99 each, eight expansion packs at $39.99, and eight game packs at $19.99. That comes to a total of $699.67. 

That’s not a huge price difference. All in all, it’s about $30 if you want to get the whole, complete collection, so why do I dislike TS4 so vehemently? 

Quality. 

Let’s compare a few expansion packs just to get a feel for what the difference is.

 TS3 launched the “Late Night” expansion at $39.99, and it included: 

A new world (Bridgeport) with 82 lots

Fame & reputation systems

Bars & night clubs

Apartments with penthouse suites

Subways

Elevators

Breast & muscle sliders in CAS*

Zodiac signs

A fountain tool*

Height adjustment for wall objects

Groups & bands

Butlers

Vampires!

The mixology skill

2 new traits (shy & star quality)

TS4 launched the “Get Famous” expansion at $39.99, and it included: 

A new world (Del Sol Valley) with 11 lots

Fame & reputation systems

Active acting career

Multiple ways to become famous 

Music, video station, etc.

And that’s about it. 

Now I’ll be the first person to admit that TS3 wasn’t perfect. Although it was a very full game, it struggled in areas of performance. With such large, open worlds, and detailed customization systems, it was pretty buggy for a lot of people, but we’ll talk on that more later. 

But what I want to focus on is the disparity between these two packs, as they’re supposed to be mirrors of one another. “Get Famous” is the TS4 version of “Late Night”, so where did all the stuff go?

Well, EA broke it into 3 packs. 

To get the full experience of “Late Night” in TS4, or at least something similar, you would need to purchase, “Get Famous”, “City Living”, and “Vampires”. That’s 2 expansion packs, and 1 game pack. So, to replicate the experience of “Late Night” you would need to spend $99.97. 

That’s almost $100. 

So, for an experience we paid $39.99 previously in the last installment, we’re now being asked to pay $100 for. 

Is that fair? 

Lets do another expansion pack comparison: 

TS3 launched “Ambitions” at $39.99, and it included: 

A new world (Twinbrook) with 82 lots

5 new active jobs that take you all around the world your sims inhabit

Firefighter, investigator, ghost hunter, stylist, and architectural designer

Self-employment

Sculptors, inventors, painters, writers, gardeners, and so on can all profit from at home work

Laundry

Tattooing career

New traits (eco-friendly, good observer, weirdo, etc.)

Consignment stores

Inventing

Sculpting

TS4 launched “Get to Work” at $39.99, and it included: 

A new world (Magnolia Promenade) with 4 lots

3 new active jobs that take place in one location

Detective, doctor, scientist

Baking & photography skills

Retail lots

Illnesses for sims

Aliens

There’s definitely more crossover here, but “Get to Work” still falls short. $39.99 for a full game and all we get is a world with 4 lots? Even in TS2 “Open for Business” we had more to do.

And, that isn’t to mention the fact that “Get to Work” launched separately from the TS4 “Laundry Day Stuff” pack. So, to get a similar experience to TS3′s “Ambitions” you would need to purchase both “Get to Work” and “Laundry Day Stuff” at a total of $49.98. 

One more comparison for good measure. 

TS3 launched “Island Paradise” at $39.99, and it included: 

A new world (Isla Paradiso) with 118 lots, the most of ANY TS3 expansion

Houseboats that can move anywhere around the island

Resorts that you can either visit, or own, manage & edit

New transportation modes

Boating, skiing, and windsurfing

3 new careers

Lifeguard, resort manager, scuba diver

Diving into fully realized underwater scenes

Sims could also catch fish, explore underwater caves & find sunken treasure

Shark & kraken attacks

Mermaids!

Missions to discover and unlock new islands

Blueprint templates*

TS4 launched “Island Living” at $39.99, and it included: 

A new world (Sulani) with 11 lots

Docks & new foundation types

4 new careers

Conservationist, diving, fishing, and lifeguard

Mermaids! 

Boats

Missions to clean up the island

2 new traits

In the case of “Island Paradise” vs. “Island Living” there are a quite a few similarities, but the disparity remains. Thankfully, this time around EA didn’t break “Island Living” into multiple packs, but imagine if in a few months we get a resort style pack? Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past EA. 

In these pack comparisons, I hope I’ve highlighted some of the issues between what should have been pretty similar packs. 

And, to clarify, I’m not saying that EA should have just copy pasted TS3 packs into the TS4 style, but for the amount of money they’re asking, the quality should remain the same. There should be a similar amount of features between each pack, but there isn’t.   

With each expansion, it feels like EA is spending less and less time working on the unique gameplay features, and pouring more time into the general aesthetics of the packs. So, while TS4 is the prettiest of all The Sims titles, it’s also the emptiest. 

Despite the shiny veneer of a good game with solid graphics, TS4 ultimately lacks depth. It doesn’t feel like a game, but rather a character creator. I spend more time building sims and their homes than I do actually playing out their lives.

All in all, I find that the “life simulation” part of TS4 is severely lacking. It mostly comes down to the little things, which is exemplified whenever I go back and replay TS2. Sims would cuddle their partner in their sleep, burglars were a real and present danger, raccoons would topple your trash can at any given chance, and friends would call all the time to ask if you wanted to go downtown. 

It’s been 6 years since TS4 came out, and, from what the dev’s have said, they aren’t planning on pushing out TS5 anytime soon, but let’s dream a little bit about what could be. 

In my perfect game, TS5 would include aspects of TS3 and TS2. The open worlds were great, but not many people’s computers were beefy enough to run them. The one thing I will applaud about TS4, is that its made with everyone in mind. We can’t all afford big, gaming computers, a lot of simmers play on their laptops, and we should all be able to play regardless of what type of machine we’re working with. 

So, instead of fully open works with 90+ lots, I would like to see open neighborhoods. If we take the open concept of TS3, and combine it with the neighborhood style of TS4, we’d get an open world of about 15-20 lots. That’s nowhere near as big as TS3, but would allow for more fun neighbor interactions, and remove the constant load screens. 

I’d also like to see a return of the color wheel. This is also a point of contention, where I understand that excessive customization really dragged down TS3 and made it unplayable for a lot of people. So instead of full customization, relegate it to just colors (instead of different materials like fabric, metal, wood, etc.,) and just CAS. 

I think a lot of what gummed up TS4 was the fact that you could customize everything. Hair color, eye color, makeup, clothes, accessories, wallpaper, paint, tiles, flooring, chairs, sofas, decorations, and on and on. Restricting it just to CAS, and in a simple color wheel would give us so much more freedom. 

A color wheel in CAS would also solve EA’s issue of diversity. While they’ve given us the ability to create trans and nonbinary sims (which is fantastic!), they’ve been really slow on any progress when it comes to skin tones. A color wheel would allow us to create sims of all colors, and give power to the players to create more realistic and diverse representations of their lives as sims. 

The last thing I would really love to see is a return to the little details. Give us more randomness. Genies, walking skeletons, ruins we can explore that aren’t just rabbit holes, more active careers, more opportunities. Don’t be afraid to give us the weird things, we love the weird things! But don’t forget about the little things. Sims sitting in the grass together and chatting, sims leaving flowers at your door after a really great date, sims scooting together to cuddle while watching a movie together on the couch. 

Overall, TS5 should just include more more, if that makes sense. 

Leave your comments & thoughts below! I’d love to talk to ya’ll about this, its really been brewing for awhile. 

*Features included in TS4 base game. 

[luked4nuke]

If, I were President of the United States. (I just wanna state I’m not a democrat or republican)

First I’d enforce Quarantine and extend it. I’d also attend the poorest families or individuals first and provide them with the financial assistance they need. People are struggling hard enough as it is living paycheck to paycheck.

Second I’d shut down the schools as I believe safty more important especially for the future kids who will rule this place. I also don’t like how schools give so much homework and stress. They just condition kids into beleiving working 40 hours a week is normal and that you should be lucky to have weekends. Staying in classes all day then returning home only to be forced to complete more homework that takes up time and robs them of social interactions. These schools don’t even test knowledge. They test obedience and reward them for being quiet little slaves that will slowly become a “regular worker.” They really don’t care about how smart you are, they test memory over all else, when they study a subject and pass the test they move on quickly to the next one stressing them out. If they failed the test, to bad they’re still moving on with you. (Sorry this got way of topic. I just hate how schools operate and also how low they pay the teachers)

Third I would dismantle the police force and create a new one. A better one that focuses on real problems like sex trafficking and drugs. All the horrible crimes that are allowed to fly under the radar. Any excessive use of force would be heavily punished. Fired, fined and jail time. No shooting at peaceful protesters, seriously dafaq is wrong with them unleashing hell upon unarmed civilians and sneaking in rioters to escalate it to justify the force.

Fourth, gold is a finite resource. Pretty much all the money you’ve ever spent is fake, all digital backed by nothing. Personally I hate it but you’ve all becomes achstomed to it so I would attempt to fix the economy so people can afford essential things, like homes and food. Instead of kicking out homeless people Id build shelters. They make it to easy to fall down into poverty and nearly impossible to climb back up. Once you’ve been arrested, once you’ve been homeless, you understand the struggle of trying to reintergrate with society. The easiest path become the dark one. I would attempt to control the population, America is a gigantic habitat and likewise it has a carrying capacity. If you’re gonna argue people have to pay unreasonable amounts of money for food you’re crazy.

Immigrants are definitely allowed as long as they follow the rules and don’t commit crimes. America was litterally founded on immigrants. American stole land from the natives violently and even managed to capture Hawaii, which was its own nation. They taxed us and recognized us as a small power. Iolani Palace has electricity flush toilets and even phones before the White House did. Queen Lili’uokalani signed in duress. It horrible and sheforfeited her whole kingdom in exchange for the people, as a leader should. The people make a country, the government already should put the people first. Without all the hardworking Americans working, there is no country.

We don’t serve the government. As a government worker we serve the people. It’s our duty to ensure everybody is treated fairly. To make sure everybody that we oversee has the essentials for life, a home and food.

And for LGBT rights. I personally don’t care what the heck they do. Love is love, let it be. They can chose to identify as whoever they want and pursue relationships with whoever. You can’t force things onto people. America is supposed to be freedom personified, we can chose to do as we please as long as we don’t bring harm to others. Those camps are wrong. America is also religion free, you can be whatever you want, Christian Muslim, litterally anything. Being a satanist is totally legal as long as you don’t hurt anything. Believe in what you want and don’t force it on others. Gay people are amazing! We all are, were all human and we can change and create change. We are all human at the core and we always have been. We have a right to love, and to be loved by all around us. Love is love, let it be, theres always been love. I can identify as a man or woman, and I can damn well love either as I please as long it’s reciprocated. I’d always rather say I love you too much then not enough.

Climate change is real. The pollution of those stupidly large companies is also VERY real. As an individual you contribute less than a percent of the actual pollution, it’s literally the big corporations. That needs to stop. I’m not exactly sure how but I AM GOING to start a wave of change that will benefit the worlds health. We all live here. This is not political, I don’t have time for games, scientists that have studied their whole lives are begging for us to change. We can all have solar electricity farms and then it’d be FREE. “But you can’t charge people for that you can’t make money.” I’m NOT TRYING TO MAKE MONEY I DO NOT CARE ANOUT MONEY. IM AIMING FOR SOMETHING BIGGER THAN GREED THE BETTERMENT OF HUMANITY. I don’t care about ruining electric companies and other random fossil fuels bullshits that will run out, I want the future to be bright!

Screw it im going off the rails, schools main courses should focus on stuff like self sustainment, like farming and wilderness survival. Creativity because that’s the most human thing about us! Empathy basic Psychology. Kids can get mad they should learn and understand why. Understand why they feel the feelings they feel and giving them all better emotional control. EMPATHY. They need to learn things like taxes since they’re such a big part. Also why the heck are taxes so complicated. It’s just targeting the illiterate foreigners and immigrants who struggle and try to understand it and I believe that’s horrible. Make it easier to become apart of America the land of freedom and the getaway from the crueler areas of earth. Maybe just limit the population. Also seriously fuck off with taxes! Why the hell are you charging and taxing 14 year olds that aren’t allowed to vote, thats taxation without representation.

Taxes should be like Mario kart and Ancient Greece. Quote from some thing I googled

“The philosopher Aristotle developed the theme. His "magnificent man" gave vast sums to the community. But poor men could never be "magnificent" because they did not have the financial means. True wealth consists in doing good, Aristotle argued in the Art of Rhetoric: in handing out money and gifts, and helping others to maintain an existence.

The idea is simple the higher up you are on the financial ladder the more you have to pay taxes and contribute to society. The large taxes from the rich help fund financial aid for the poor and stuff. The rich did not earn that money they climbed to top on top a mountain of millions of shortcuts and underpaid workers It should be an honor to be taxed and help the poor people survive. Like in Mario kart, the higher you’re placed the harder it is to maintain it and the last place people always get the better power ups giving them a constant fighting chance. At most I believe wealth should be hoarded to sustain like one generation of kids, two at the most. Maybe three but theres no reason anybody should have all that money that your never going to spend or all that money that becomes worthless once a war or breaks out or aliens attack or something. Life is more important than money. Something simple everyone should consider.

I think everybody should be able to pursue a career and each career should be sustainable. Enjoyment in a job of your choosing without worrying about financial burden. Jobs would be divided into smaller simple groups and the pay would based on their contribution to society. Like doctors getting paid more and getting teachers paid more, but small retailers wouldn’t get paid as much but they could survive not living paycheck to paycheck. The motivation is everybody should free to pursue the hobby they love without being punished. Maybe little Timmy doesn’t want to be a firefighter, maybe he desires a simple fun life selling flowers. That’s fine! Maybe they don’t wanna become the hero but it’ll be an honor to society. As long as you have a job that contributes to society you can live for free. If everybody is constantly trying to make the most profit, then we all become a bucket of crabs dragging each other down. I can’t sell my $10 good that costed me $2 to make. Also the whole buy back thing irritates me, I spent $60 on this goddamn game and GameStop can only give me like $10 in store credit or $5 in real life? That’s isn’t fair and that applies to pretty much everything. That’s $1000 phone you bought is barley worth $357 right now. I’m pretty sure it didn’t cost that much to make these things but like DAMN. Capitalism sucks.

In summary, I don’t know much about politics but I would be the human party. I don’t care about left or right. I’m the one that doesn’t care about money. I care more about life and creativity. Peoples right to enjoyment and living a happy life with others regardless of gender. Survival of the human race and advancement into the future where more things are free and we can constantly focus on creating an even BETTER one. We can’t go anywhere without each other especially if we’re all just a bucket of crabs. To greedy and self destructive constantly looking out only for themselves. Seriously get your act together humans before you kickstart your own downfall. If we’re all trying to make a profit, nobody does. The best things in life are free. You can pursue wealth for your future or you can focus and live and enjoy and love the now. Mario kart style, where all in this race for life and we all deserve a winning chance.

[virtuous-homes-blog]

Invest in property

Last year's housing market was clearly one for the record books, with the gains partly driven by tightening stocks and exceptionally low mortgage rates. In some pockets of the country, housing prices climbed well over 10 percent on average. But, it's not only the big coastal cities which are seeing enormous growth. A survey from GoBankingRates demonstrated that many cities with the most growth proved inland, including: Buffalo, New York (34.6percent ), Atlanta, Georgia (24.54%), and Cincinnati, Ohio (20.6percent ). Bearing this in mind, you could be wondering in the event that you should throw your hat in the ring and invest in real estate -- or, in case you're too late. You might also be asking yourself if you should invest in property in a traditional sense -- as in, becoming a landlord. Now, here is the fantastic news. Not only is currently still a great time to invest in real estate since longer growth is probably on its way, but there are also more ways than ever to invest in housing without dealing with tenants or the other minutiae of landlord perform . Here are some of the best choices at this time: An exchange-traded finance, also called an ETF, is a set of stocks or bonds in a single fund. ETFs are similar to index funds and mutual funds from the fact they come with the exact same broad diversification and low prices over all. If you are angling to invest in real estate but also want to diversify, investing in a real-estate themed ETF may be a smart move. Vanguard's VNQ, for instance, is a property ETF that invests in stocks issued by real estate investment trusts (REITs) that buy office buildings, hotels, and other kinds of property. IYR is another real estate ETF that works similarly since it offers targeted access to domestic property stocks and REITs. There are loads of other ETFs offering exposure to real estate, too, so be sure to do your research and consider the options. A colleague of mine, Taylor Schulte of Define Financial in San Diego, says he swears by a real estate mutual fund known as DFREX. Why? Since its low expenses and track document help him feel confident about future yields. Besides low prices, Schulte says the strategy of DFREX is backed by decades of academic study from Nobel Prize winning economists. TIREX is another property mutual fund to consider with $1.9 billion in assets, broad diversification among real estate holdings, and low prices. #3: Invest in REITs Consumers invest in REITs to precisely the exact same reason they invest in property ETFs and mutual funds; they would like to invest in property without holding physical land. REITs let you do precisely that although also diversifying your holdings dependent on the type of property class each REIT invests in. Financial advisor Chris Ball of BuildFinancialMuscle.com advised me he personally invests in REITs for its diversification and for its"non-correlation" with other types of equities. He says that he likes the long-term data regardless of the typical mood swings and downs and ups of the real estate marketplace. "Additionally, it gives me exposure to property without having to be a landlord," he says. Ball also says a lot of his clients agree with that place and invest in REITs as part of the portfolio as a result. With that being said, I typically suggest customers stay away from non-traded REITs and purchase just publicly-traded REITs instead. The U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) lately came outside to warn against non-traded REITs, imagining their lack of liquidity, high prices, and too little value transparency produce undue risk. #4: Invest at a property focused company There are a number of businesses that own and manage property without working as a REIT. The difference is, you'll need to dig to find them and they can pay a lower dividend than a REIT. Firms who are actual estate-focused can include resorts, resort operators, timeshare businesses, and commercial property developers, for instance. Be certain that you conduct due diligence before you buy stock in individual businesses, but this alternative may be great one if you need exposure to a particular kind of real estate investment and have time to research historical data, company background, and other details. #5: Invest in house construction If you look at real estate market expansion throughout the last ten years or longer, it's simple to observe that much of it is the end result of limited housing stock. Because of this, many predict that construction of new homes will continue to flourish during the next few decades or more. In that sense, it's easy to see why investing in the building side of this sector could also be smart. An whole industry of home builders need to come up with new neighborhoods and rehabilitate old ones, after all, so today might be a good time to buy in. Massive homebuilders to watch comprise LGI Homes (LGIH), Lennar (LEN), D.R. Horton (DHI), and Pulte Homes (PHM), however there are lots of other people to discover by yourself. #6: Hire a home manager Despite the fact that you do not have to purchase physical property to invest in property, there is at least one strategy that could allow you to have your cake and eat it, too. Many investors who want exposure to leasing property they could view and touch go right ahead and purchase leases but hire a property manager to perform all the heavy lifting. While he tried to manage his properties from a distance at firsthe ultimately chose to use a property manager to save his sanity and his gains. While he forks over 8-10% of gross rent to his manager, it was "one of the best decisions he's ever made" as a real estate agent, he says. "They take care of the rental property basics - minor repairs, vetting prospective tenants, collecting rents - so that I can concentrate on my career, family, and locating the upcoming lucrative rental property investment," notes Huffman. In that sense, he receives the benefits of being a landlord with the hard work. "Among the most crucial roles a home manager plays is that they work as a buffer between the renter and me," says Huffman. "I don't receive random texts, calls, or even emails from tenants in all hours of the night or day." The key to making sure this approach works is ensuring that you only invest in properties with enough cash flow to pay for a property manager and still score a substantial speed of return. #7: Invest in real estate notes Property notes are a sort of investment you are able to buy if you're interested in investing in real estate but don't necessarily wish to manage a brick-and-mortar construction. When you are investing in real estate notes through a bank, you're typically buying debt at costs that are well below what a retail dealer would pay. I've invested in property notes in the past via an individual investor I know who buys and renovates property. Thus far, my experiences have only been positive. However, I would conduct due diligence to be sure you know what you are getting into whether you invest into real estate notes using a bank or a property investor who is actively pursuing new possessions. #8: Hard money loans If you do not like any of those other ideas on this list but have cash to lend, you could also consider giving a hard money loan. My friend Jim Wang of WalletHacks.com says he's now investing in real estate with this strategy because he wants exposure but doesn't wish to cope with being a landlord. In addition, he says the ROI (return on investment) because of his time wouldn't be as great as other chances because his time is valuable. Hard money loans are essentially a direct loan into a real estate investor, '' he states. Wang offers property loans to an investor he understands in person, and he receives a 12% return on his money as a result. Wang says he feels comfortable with the set-up since the investor is someone he knows, but he isn't convinced he'd be comfortable with a stranger. In any event, hard money loans directly to real estate investors are another strategy to consider if you would like to invest in property but do not wish to manage a property and the frustrations that come with it. Last but not least, don't forget about all the new companies which have cropped up to help investors become involved in property without getting their hands dirty. Sites like Fundrise and Realty Mogul allow you to invest into commercial leasing or flipping houses and get money flow distributions in return. Investing with either business is similar to investing in REITs because your money is pooled with money from other investors that take advantage of the platform. The money you invest can be used to purchase residential property, commercial property, apartment buildings, and more. Ultimately, you receive the advantage of distributions and dividends and long-term appreciation of those properties that you"own." While neither company has been around for too long, they're doing well so far. Fundrise returned a mean of 11.4% on invested dollars in 2017 net of charges and 9.11 percent in 2018 after all, and you don't have to be an accredited investor to open an account.

[paperclipninja]

Younger post-ep ramble 6x10

Ok, so this week’s episode, ‘It’s All About The Money, Honey’ delivered two of my season 6 wish list items: Kelsey and Charles working together as a supportive team and really getting to see their dynamic and relationship (I sometimes forget that they have a whole history BL - Before Liza) and Liza and Charles getting drunk and handsy at a bar. I’m not even kidding, when I wrote my season 6 wish list I word for word wrote that. So thank you for those Alison Brown, I am simple folk and I am happy. I would also like to show my appreciation for a number of throwbacks that were nice little nuggets from previous seasons.

I don’t know whether it was deliberate or not, but this ep seemed to really play very obvious set ups, where you could see what was coming and kind of hoped it’d play out differently because eek! but then nope. I have no idea if this approach has a name in screenwriting, it was sort of like set-up slapstick, for absolute lack of any better description (I’m sure ‘eek!’ is a technical term somewhere…). I am writing much of this on a plane on my way to holiday time (yay), which may mean nothing or something but I think my point is that I may miss a few bits and pieces here and there. There’s much to discuss so let’s do this! 

After their declarations of love last week, this episode opens with Zane, a towel, his abs and Kelsey chatting about her trip to Chicago to ‘beg for money’, which nicely sets up a few themes for the ep. The issue of not being taken seriously as a woman in business is quickly flagged, along with the appropriate foreshadowing of future faux pas with Zane’s reassurance that Kelsey will get their attention being the only woman in the room (as he very unsubtly opens her shirt while staring at her chest) and Kelsey’s quip that ‘I guess I have more assets than you’ (boobs, she means her boobs ICYMI).

Liza and Charles are also saying their farewells, with Charles continuing to be supportive boyfriend no. 1 as he tells Liza to stop feeling guilty before reassuring her that everything is going to be fine, which we all know means it absolutely will not be. I’d like to officially welcome back the ‘miss you’ texts because a) they’re adorable and b) I do love a good text distraction as a giant poster of a woman and her ex goes past on the side of a bus just when that woman is floating along blissfully thinking of her current bf. As she passes another poster, it’s only a matter of time until Liza comes face to face with, well, her face. On the side of a building. Eek! indeed.

Naturally Liza’s first instinct is to call Kelsey, who is at the airport with Charles, to ask her to stop him from seeing the ad until she has the chance to speak to him. I feel like a phone call to Charles instead in that moment would’ve sorted it all pretty quickly, but then we would’ve missed out on his smile at the pic of Liza that comes up on Kelsey’s phone and the funniest moment of the episode, Kelsey’s sudden onset escalator phobia (‘I don’t like them, they’re weird’ LOL). The absolute highlight of this episode for me was seeing Kelsey and Charles working together. From the moment she’s filling him in on the investors they’re meeting with because she’s done her research to Charles saying that she can do the job without investors sticking their noses in (Bryce reference noted, what a dud) to Kelsey redirecting him to the elevator and him confused but obliging without question, their dynamic from the get go was fab and a lovely build on last week’s ep.

Meanwhile, luckily for Liza Lauren is at work, which is really lucky for all of us because Lauren now only referring to Diana as Diva and Diana clearly very ok with it is all I’ve ever wanted and my mind is filling in all the blanks about what the two of them would have been sitting there talking about while waiting to see if the people they sent to catch their food return (this line = yes Diva). I loved Lauren’s 'here?’ when Liza asks if she can talk to her (then 'so here, ok’ as she sits down lol) because it certainly feels as though Lauren is trying to keep the moment about Diana and the excitement of getting the appointment at Kleinfeld and is reluctant to let Liza make it all about her (which she of course does and Diana calls her out on it and I am here for it every day of the week). 

Liza’s obsessive focus on the ad campaign and the need to speak to Charles about it really consumes her for the entire episode and blinds her to the needs of any other characters in way that seems uncharacteristic, but is also quite on brand considering some of the self-absorbed moments we’ve seen from her throughout the series. I guess it just seems uncharacteristic for season 6 Liza (or at least my understanding and construction of this character at this point), with a lie no longer in play and able to live her life honestly, as she’s been hoping to do since season one. I’m unsure whether this fixation and her consequent behaviour was meant to be funny or highlight the point that clearly there is more to the poster than it just being about clothes (we get it, there are FEELINGS), but I have to say that I really struggled with it considering Liza’s journey to where she is now and also this show’s usual tendency to be more nuanced.

Despite Liza’s persistence with Lauren re: Infinitely 21 at Kleinfeld (my concern that Lauren was harbouring some ill feeling towards Liza following the lie reveal was quashed when she revealed that she’d phoned Shelly to say Liza was uncomfortable with the ad. I mean, ‘I left a voicemail for you!’ is as ‘I’ve got your back’ as it comes), we were given a delightful moment between Diana and Liza as they reminisced about their first weddings and it’s conversations like this that I would like to see many more of. These two talking as women who have shared life experience is everything. It is then revealed that Infinitely 21’s campaign is going national which leads Liza to bail on the bride to frantically make a dash to Chicago, but my main takeaway from this scene is that Diana is going to have the wedding celebration she damn well deserves and quite frankly, this Trout/DeLuca “event of the year” cannot come fast enough.

Turns out Liza is not the only one getting on a big jet plane, as Claire fills Josh in on the amazing promotion to Senior Project Manager she’s been offered at Google, which will set Gemma up nicely. The only catch is, it’s in LA. Josh is understandably upset and as Claire assures him they’ll figure it out, he also spots the Infinitely 21 poster for the first time, because the only thing better than finding out your daughter might be moving across the country is being plastered all over the city in a pic with your ex who you’re still in love with. One of my favourite friendships on this show is that between Maggie and Josh, so I enjoyed seeing him go to Maggie to talk over the revelations of the morning (what a morning!). You’ve gotta love Maggie’s, ‘it’s not a sign’ to snap Josh out of the wallowing (and Josh’s ‘it’s literally a sign’, ha), her encouraging him to fight for Gemma and use the Infinitely 21 success to his advantage was a solid suggestion (though I am a little disappointed that Maggie didn’t ask if he’d consider moving to LA as one possible option to keep Gemma in his life or at least throw it out there on one of her famous Maggie ‘these are your options’ lists).

Josh meets with Shelly, who makes zero attempt to hide her thirst and it’s pretty darn hilarious and I actually love this entire interaction. Josh’s idea of franchising Inkburg, mentioned at the retreat in episode 6, remerges in the form of a collaboration with Infinitely 21 (Retail-tainment). Inkburg Midtown would offer a set of flash pieces exclusive to Infinitely 21, it is all very well pitched and I like seeing Josh in business mode because he’s clearly pretty decent at it after all these years, but not as much as Shelly likes it and him and everything which leads to her basically groping him in store (‘I’m a hugger’, yeah sure Shel). I have to believe that Josh’s move to establish the partnership with Infinitely 21 is so that he has clout to replicate the idea in LA and establish a national presence if he wants, rather than to try and keep Claire in New York by saying he can support her financially (unless we discover that is what Claire actually wants). Josh has been written as way too woke to do something to sabotage the career of the mother of his child, especially considering his experience with Liza and knowing what she went through. I, for one, will watch this space.

Another space I have watched closely is Kelsey’s, especially as she’s grappled with the role of publisher and really found her feet in the last couple of episodes. Her brilliant boss mode continued this week and seeing Kelsey so nervous before the pitch meeting, but still keeping her level head even after discovering Jacobs was the only shot at keeping the company alive, demonstrated again how much she has grown. From the moment Jeffrey and Ennis greet Kelsey and Charles, and by greet I mean look straight through Kelsey at Charles, you just know that this is going to be a tough gig for Kels. The men very obviously talk only to Charles, patronise Kelsey asking 'do you even know what those [precious metals] are?’, ugh it’s all so gross but also a bit too real and familiar. I love that Charles makes a point of saying 'we’ and emphasising that they are a team and it is obvious he is not comfortable that even when Kelsey is speaking they still look at and talk to him. Seeing Kelsey interject confidently and intelligently (although when she tells that room of suits to follow her on Insta it was a definite Eek! moment) was so satisfying, she read the room, commanded it pay attention and it did. Charles is proud and impressed and lets her hold the floor (as he should but it was great to see) and I could legit watch a whole series with these two as kick-ass business partners.

Just when I thought my new fave dynamic duo couldn’t have any more golden moments, Kelsey and Charles getting celebratory drinks happened. After last season saw a lot of tension between these two characters, seeing this relationship shift to one of mentor/mentee that is truly symbiotic (I have no doubt that Charles is learning as much from Kelsey as she is from him), where Kelsey still needs reassurance about how the business world works and Charles expresses his eternal gratitude for her amazing work…seriously, did I mention how much I love this? It is an actual dream.

Of course it is just after a commemorative glass clinking moment that Liza arrives, much to the elation of Charles (‘this day just keeps getting better and better’, ugh) and wariness of Kelsey, who immediately questions Liza’s real reason for being there.  Upon hearing that the Infinitely 21 campaign (yes, we’re still talking about that) has gone national so Liza came to speak to Charles, Kelsey looks at her with the same ‘you have lost the plot’ look I had on my face, before telling her, ‘not now…we are celebrating’. Liza agrees as smitten, happy Charles looks over but this high school drama-esque carry on is really a bit much at this point. All I can say is thank goodness for the scene that followed, because it very quickly made me forget that I was getting annoyed.

First we get the revelation that Liza made out with Chrissie Hart on Shelter Island, which was also the last time we saw Charles and Liza drunk together but they were also not actually together, so it was very much that moment that sparked my need to see them out and drinking again some time.  So yes, sharing great stories as they all sit around, check, they are all so carefree and jovial and then Charles and Liza just start making out in front of third wheel Kelsey and I cannot and this is 100% the quality content that my trashbag heart lives for. But it is Liza and Charles bidding Kelsey goodnight when she says she’s heading back to her room, and Charles saying, ‘bye’ before turning to Liza with a soft, ‘hi’ that completely undoes me. Seriously, project this entire scene on loop on my tombstone for I. am. deceased.

Drunk Kelsey back in her room responding to Zane’s message with a boob shot = I am DYING again but for different reasons. Kelsey Lorraine indeed, Lauren seeing it on Insta stories is every kind of second hand mortification and poor Kelsey waking up and realising what she’s done is yikes (but lbh it’s also a little bit hilarious, special thanks to the messages left on her story: A tale of two titties, Nippy longstockings and my personal fave, Did you mean to post this? It’s Liz from the gym). Kelsey’s waking nightmare is contrasted by Liza waking up to her fantasy of her, Charles, coffee and paper (you and me both sista), but my fantasy is quickly shattered when Liza spots that pesky ad on the back of the newspaper and grabs it from Charles in a totally normal way, which he interprets to be playful and suggestive, until he realises it is not.

Liza’s reveal makes it pretty obvious that she’s feeling guilty but that is quickly interrupted by the frantic knocking of Kelsey, the bearer of more bad news. Liza greeting her with ‘he’s seen it’, countered by Kelsey’s horrified, ‘Charles saw my boobs?’ before Liza corrects her with, ‘no, the Infinitely 21 ad’ is just so mind boggling, I mean, what person in their right mind opens the door to their best friend’s incessant knocking and thinks ‘they must be beside themselves to find out if I told Charles yet?’ I get it, it’s consuming Liza because it’s dredging up feelings so that the triangle can be revived after lying dormant (presumed dead) the past two seasons, but Charles having to hear about Kelsey’s mistake (though Liza’s ‘you look good’ is v. funny), as well as process that Liza didn’t come to Chicago to surprise him and Kelsey at all just makes me pretty sad.

Kelsey continues to be impressive as she owns her screw up and humbly explains herself to the room full of gross men. I do love how they’ve been cast, so much brown fabric. Charles’, 'it’s just too much of a good thing…I mean Kelsey’s internet presence’, is awks af but he’s really trying to throw his support behind her. Ennis Jacobs asking Kelsey if she’s considered distancing herself from the Millennial brand (dude, she IS the Millennial brand) and saying they are still interested in investing if Charles is publisher made me want to scream for her, Charles’ assertion that 'she is a woman who has made nothing but smart decisions since she’s been in a position to make decisions’ met with the biggest decision Kelsey has made yet; stepping down as publisher.

I do see it, the juxtaposition of how a man embroiled in a scandal (publisher having an affair with a 28 year old assistant) is treated vs. a woman whose potentially scandalous error was accidental, that the ultimate ramifications for him are minimal because look, he’s now back where he was not that long ago (though I also see the mirroring of Charles having to step down due to the scandal and now Kelsey having to do the same…so maybe they’re just the ultimate tag team?). I am going to wait to see how the rest of this season plays out (on all fronts), but if at seasons end, Charles is publisher again, and it’s all basically as it once was, then what was the point of any of this beyond making that statement? I mean, there are a number of ways it could go, so I am interested to see what this means. I am just really heartbroken for Kelsey because in that moment, she put the need of the company ahead of her own ambition and I am also heartbroken because she really had FINALLY come into her own as publisher and I was excited to see what she would do next.

After the horrendous meeting, Liza is waiting for Charles to finish the conversation about the ad and Charles suggests that she fly back to NY with Kelsey, because ‘she needs you now’ (seriously, if Charles is in your corner he is IN your corner). I love that Charles knows what Liza flying to Chicago really means and calls her out on it, that he is not bothered by her past or relationship with Josh, it’s the fact she felt she had to get on a plane that makes him wonder if there is something to be worried about. Call me boring but I have always appreciated that these two have actual proper adult conversations and don’t avoid issues and this was no exception.

Charles puts it to Liza that ‘everyone has a past, but in order to have a future, you move on from it’, to which she responds that ‘other people live in the past in order to have a future’.  Yes, Liza had to live a younger life in order to build a new future for herself but now that she has re-established her career and her real age is no longer a secret, is that what she wants to keep doing? I do believe Liza realises she isn’t being fair to Charles but I think we all know that even if her pledge not to see Josh anymore was genuine at the time, it is not going to be upheld and was probably a bit of an over-promise. But I do appreciate that Liza really is choosing Charles in that moment.

It’s the escalator ride (which is weirdly relatable for some reason) once Kelsey and Liza are back in New York, but neither want to go home, that shows that even if Liza does want to move forward, she is still stuck between these two worlds. I have to say, Kelsey losing her job and being publicly humiliated somehow being on par with a 42 year old woman feeling sad that she can’t be friends with an ex because she’s confused about her feelings is ridiculous and I personally feel like the final moments of this ep should have been focused squarely on Kelsey. I do agree with Liza that Kelsey will get it back though, that was the correct response.

The painfully longing glances at the giant poster of her and Josh can be taken as a letting go of the past and moving forward (time will tell) but it also undoubtedly indicates that Liza’s days of once again oscillating between these two men are very much on the horizon which is, to be frank, really disappointing at this point in a series. My biggest issue is the fact that we keep being told that this show is not about the triangle, it’s about the women and the friendships yet it’s constantly being made about the triangle. In always pulling the focus to the triangle this show is making it about the men, which is the very thing it so brilliantly admonishes society for doing.

While I am absolutely reserving all judgement until I see how the rest of this season unfolds, I have to believe that if the triangle does make a comeback, it is being dredged up again to bring it to a head once and for all, so that we can all move on and focus on the many far more compelling aspects that make up this wonderful show.

[peachofyourheart]

How To Be A Professional Author And Not Die Screaming And Starving In A Lightless Abyss

Your reading today comes in the form of this Medium article by Heather Demetrios: “How To Lose A Third Of A Million Dollars Without Even Trying.” It’s a good article. I feel deeply for the writer, because this shit we do comes with no real map. No creative map, no story map, no industry map, no money map. “HERE IS A BUNCH OF MONEY,” a sinister shadowy figure says in an alley. “IN SIX MONTHS, WE WILL EXTRACT FROM YOU A BOOK, AND THEN THE DEAL IS COMPLETE.” And then the shadowy figure is gone, and all you’re left with is the crisp smell of burning paper and a mysterious whisper in the well of your ear that says, “deckle edge.”

But, the good news is, there exist answers to a lot of these conundrums, and so I’m going to do some painting-with-shotguns here and try to broad-stroke some thoughts and answers about the challenges this writer faced in her Authorial Journey.

Your Agent Is There To Help You

You need an agent, and a good agent who will explain to you this stuff — an agent who answers questions you don’t know to ask and who also (obviously) answers the questions you do ask. Now, an agent isn’t psychic, and I’m gonna guess a lot of them default to expecting you know some of this stuff, or they’re so brined and pickled in the industry they’re like fish swimming in water who don’t know what “water” even is anymore. Which leads me to highlight the next point:

Definitely Ask Questions

Deeeefiniiiiitely totally utterly absoflogginlutely ask questions. All kinds of questions. No questions are foolish, especially when it regards your career, your finances, your future. Ask your agent. Ask your editor. Ask anybody you know in the industry. Ask other writers! I have found other writers to be a wonderful well of fresh, clean water when it comes to that sort of thing. Certainly I must acknowledge that I feel the SFF genre is an embarrassment of riches when it comes to industry folks willing to share their experiences and offer answers. Oh! Speakawhich, may I recommend Dongwon Song’s PUBLISHING IS HARD newsletter?

Definitely Ask Questions From Multiple Sources

Crowdsource better answers by getting multiple answers. That’s it, that’s the deal. One answer may not be comprehensive. Also, authors are not always right about how things work. Hell, I’m probably wrong about stuff in this very post. Also, if your agent isn’t clear on this stuff, or won’t answer questions, fire that agent out of a cannon, and into the mouth of a great white shark.

Publishing Money Is Fucking Weird

Publishing, particularly big publishing (sorry, Big Publishing, aka Big Book, or The Bibliodeities of Mannahattan) pays advances ahead of your royalties. Smaller advances mean you’re likelier to earn out, but a small advance also does little for you up front. Larger advances mean you’ve got a considerably larger “cost of life” cushion, but are less likely to earn out.

Your contract likely stipulates you get paid a certain amount up front — a third of the contract, let’s say — upon signing, and then you get paid the rest of your advance usually in chunks when you meet certain milestones. Turned in first draft, or final draft, or upon publication. I have found these milestones to be different at different publishers (and I’ve worked with a lotta publishers).

You owe 15% of that to your agent/agency.

Earning out is a theoretically straightforward affair — calculate how much you make per book based on the percentage royalty driven by format. Let’s say 10% per hardcover sale, or 25% of an e-book. But there, we enter into squirmy, less certain territory already. If Amazon discounts your book, do you make the 10% on the cover price, or the sale price? (My understanding here is, it depends on who initiates that sale. Amazon initiates, you get it on full. Publisher initiates, you get on the publisher’s choice of price.) So, every sale of a book is earning you a specific amount of money —

So, if my book Wanderers is a hardcover at $28.99, I theoretically make ~$2.90 per sale of that. And an e-book at $13.99 earns me ~$3.50, so from there I should easily be able to calculate what it would take in this round to “earn out,” but I’ve done that math on other books, and I’ve never found it particularly accurate. Why? Because it actually isn’t that simple. Between audio sales and library sales and less traditional sales channels and then book returns (yes, bookstores return unsold stock sometimes and that can ding you), it starts to become a bit of occult calculus that only sorcerers can understand. You can kinda eyeball it? You can make some educated guesses as to how many books you’ll have to sell to earn out, but even then, how many in what format? Some books sell 75% in e-book. Some sell only 25% in e-book. Wanderers, to my shock, has had a rough split of 33/33/33% across print, e-book, audio. Could I have foretold that? Nope.

If you know how many books you sold, that would help, but —

It’s Hard To Know How Many Books You’ve Sold

Publishers are starting to catch up to the fact that authors want to know how well they’re selling (weird, who knew?) — Penguin Random House has a pretty robust, snap-to-it site that has daily updates to your book’s sales. It’s nice to have, if not necessarily useful at every step. And it’s not always wholly accurate, either, which honestly isn’t their fault — we imagine an age where every strand of every industry is plucked with every sale, neatly and nicely updating the total, but as with every industry, it’s less an elegant web and more a clumsy knot. Retailers are independent and not plugged into one another. Each store is not lightning fast in how they respond to things. Even Amazon on the back-end is, from my understanding, kind of a hot mess.

(It’s funny, I’ve met with Amazon multiple times under the auspices of, “Tell us how to help authors more.” Arguably because they want to help more than publishers do, making friends of authors directly, beyond publisher relationships — which, ennnh, okay. Still, I always tell them one thing: GIVE AUTHORS MORE DATA. Tell us our sales! Tell us our Kindle sales in particular! Tell us when people quit reading our books! And they say OOH YES GOOD POINT and then it never happens and hahaha good times.)

Treat Your Publishing Money Like A Demonic Bargain

You should always be fairly dubious of that money. Not that it’ll disappear — it’s just, it’s wildly inconsistent, as I hope I’ve made clear. It’s inconsistent in its timing, in its amount, in everything. It’s constantly shifting ground, and that unsteadiness of the financial earth should leave you particularly touchy. The ground can crack and fall out at any point, which is why you need to budget. Planning is key for a writer’s life, and that’s hard, because we’re a sack of cats, mentally. But you gotta know how to portion it out, and you have to see down the road to where the money is coming from. (As a sidenote, it’s why it’s vital not to give up too many rights — foreign, film/TV, other licensing opportunities — to the publisher. Those random drops of money, while totally not-count-on-able, can be helpful just the same.)

Oh also ha ha ha the taxes are killer.

You’re gonna pay taxes on that.

And they’re not fun.

Budget, budget, budget. At any meaningful levels of money coming in, GET THEE AN ACCOUNTANT, and possibly even hie thee hence to forming an LLC, which can, at high enough income levels, drop your tax burden a little bit. Others will sell LLCs as also being able to defer liability but most lawyers and accountants I’ve asked about this suggest it’s a bit of a myth.

It’s hard to get a mortgage as a writer, if you’re the only income.

Trust me when I tell you that. Doesn’t matter what you earn, you don’t fit into a box that they can neatly check on the application, so you’re a strange animal to the mortgage broker, like a Zebra who fucked a Dolphin and who is also from the future? We’ll talk more about DAY JORBS in a minute.

Cost Of Living Is A Real Thing

The cost of living is tied to where you live. And so, your Publishing Dollar goes a lot farther in places where the cost of living is lower. In other words, if you’re going to choose to live in The City (that city being NYC, SF, whatever), you are almost certainly fucking yourself in every uncomfortable position.

Now, the opposite of that is, sometimes you get advice that amounts to demanding you live in some unpleasant nowheresville — and that’s fine, if you’re fine with it. I’m not. My publishing money could go much farther if I lived, say, 100 miles to the west, but instead, I live where I live. It’s not a profoundly expensive place, especially compared to, say, NYC, but it’s also not as cheap as, say, Ohio. But (nothing personal) I do not want to live in Ohio, I want to live where I live, because of culture, because of education, because of access to places like NYC or Philly or the Lehigh Valley, and so here I dwell, even if my Publishing Dollar would go farther in Nebraska or even in the middle of my own state. As writers, I find we do thrive a little bit based a little on the place we live — and so, live where you want to live, just be aware that there are concessions to be made if you do, and costs for that choice. But also, probably don’t live in NYC or SF. Live near them, ok. In them, not so much.

Back To Those Pesky Advances

I have been fortunate enough to have a somewhat gentle arc to my career — a nice hill of slowly advancing advances. I started small, with four figures, and have added zeroes as time went on. It’s been a slow boil but I prefer that, because it demonstrates what I hope is an increasing audience and quality of books. The worry is when you jump through the gate and someone hands you a fat sack of six figures and it’s like — boy howdy, you’ve probably got nowhere to go but down. Debuts tend to get an almost weird amount of attention (same as how the first book in a series nearly always gets 1000% more publishing attention than the second or third), but even with that, it’s hard to see how a New Author is going to just Rocket to the Moon on a first, big book. It can happen! It has and will again. But just know that opening big is a trickier gambit. It’s like, you wrote some songs and have a guitar and OOPS now you’re headlining Coachella ha ha good luck I’m sure you’ll be fine.

Wait I Didn’t Even Talk About Bucket, Or Joint, Accounting

Back to the tricky calculus of “earning out” — it gets trickier when you realize that some deals don’t just demand you earn out one book, but rather, all the books in your contract. The advances-per-book are put in a bucket, and so you must out-earn the bucket amount, not the per-book amount, before you start seeing royalties beyond your advances. This can be tricky with a series, let’s say, where the first book does well, and where no subsequent book is likely to do better than that first book — it robs you a chance of earning out with one book even if you don’t on the next two, let’s say.

How Marketing Is Tied To Advance

In general (and nothing is ever universal in this industry), the higher the advance, the more money the publisher has in their budget to support the book, particularly in terms of marketing, advertising, and publicity. On the one hand, this makes sense, right? Your book is an investment, and so they don’t wanna invest a bunch of money and then just have it fail — so they contribute more money and infrastructure toward paying off that investment. But it also means that lower advances can mark you in the “uhhh let’s throw it at the wall and see what sticks!” category, which is tough. It puts a lot of burden on you. And that burden is often unfairly thought of as being high effective buuuuut

You Are Never As Effective As A Publishing Budget

Trust me when I say, you can do a lot as an author to encourage people to read your books. But also trust me when I say, a publisher’s efforts in this realm is multiplicative compared to what you can achieve. Stay in this industry long enough — and so much of this industry is exactly that, just staying in the goddamn game — and you will reliably detect when a publisher is spending money on a book. You can tell because it’ll have buzz, it’ll get media placement, you’ll have appearances, and so on. You can also tell when they haven’t done shit for your book. Even if you yourself have done a lot!

Do you need a website? Probably. Doesn’t need to be fancy, but shouldn’t look like a half-ass botch-job, either. Should work on mobile and all that.

Do you need swag? I’m of a mind that it moves zero needles, and I’ve never seen data that it moves needles, and it just seems to be a thing authors have internalized that they need?

Do you need a tour? I mean, I dunno. At a debut level, I’d say no. As with crowdfunding anything, you need an audience already in place to make that make sense. Better to do cons and conferences, I think, at earlier levels, though other authors may disagree.

This is part of the trick, by the way: advice for a debut author, and for a mid-list author, and for a mid-career author, and for a hugely successful author, are very, very different. It can in fact be as individual as writing process. It’s all broad strokes, so take everything even here with many many grains of salt.

A whole salt lick, even.

Your Day Job? Don’t Quit It

This will be the 1000th time I’ve said this and I’ll say it a million more: don’t quit your day job. When do you quit your day job? When the work is at such a level that you either have to quit writing, or quit the day job. That’s it. When you’re up against the wall and you see, “I can’t write these books and also still go to work every day,” that’s a signal. (And ideally it’s a decision made easily because you’re making enough money at writing that it makes both financial sense and is a financial necessity.)

But otherwise? Hang tight. You’ll have no health care. As I said, mortgages will be harder to get. Everything is a little harder when you’re a ROGUE AUTHOR FREELANCE MERC out there in the PUBLISHING WASTELAND. Bonus: have a spouse who has health care and a steady job.

Note, again, I’m fortunate enough to be the sole income for our household as a writer. And I’m doing okay, and am comfortable. But I also still have these difficulties, and the erratic payment schedules can be brutal. All of it adds up to:

Have Plans On Top Of Plans

It’s like, if you live in the PNW, you probably have an Earthquake Preparedness Kit? You need that as an author. (Er, metaphorically speaking. Authors are not subject to actual earthquakes in particular.) Squirrel away money. Have plans on top of plans. What if your genre collapses? What if your agent quits? What if your next advance is way too low to survive upon? What if the economy shits the bed? Have a plan for next year, for five years, for ten. Envision how you remain in this game. A writing career is, as I’ve noted before, a CLIFF MITIGATION EXERCISE. You are eternally speeding toward the cliff’s edge. You might careen off that edge and into a ravine and crash in a spectacular fashion at the end of every contract. And so you need to imagine how — before it happens! — you’re gonna build a ramp or a bridge or some rocket boosters or shit. You gotta Evel Knievel that cliff somehow — but how? New genre? New age range? Break into comics? Some self-publishing on the side? Have plans inside plans inside plans. Especially if shit goes sideways. My day to day is spent thinking 50% about what stories I want to write and 50% what I’m going to do to keep my career going. Which leaves me little time for like, BASIC LIFE-BRAIN FUNCTIONS, so uhhh oops?

To Add In, And To Sum Up

– Publishing is fucking nuts, and trying to understand it is like trying to win a staring contest with the Eye of Sauron, but you gotta try, or you’ll die

– JESUS CHRIST ask some questions, seriously

– Publishing is not a lottery, and you need to treat it like a serious business venture where you’re given the squalling baby of a writing career and your job is to keep that thing alive and somehow get it to college, and if someone wants to put that writing career baby in college before it’s learned to walk, you should be very very wary of that

– Drink the fancy cocktails when you visit NYC, but don’t live there, for Christ’s sake

– Not every publisher is the same, some are fucking amateur hour karaoke, and some are well-trained machine assassins who never miss their shot

– You don’t control what a publisher does; get me drunk and I’ll tell you STORIES

– You should definitely know when your book is coming out and not via Google Alert, like, just ask, just ask your editor or ask your agent to ask your editor (your agent can be a very good “bad cop” if you need them to be, and they should be eager to fill that position, because a good agent is working for YOU, not for their relationship with the publisher), AHHH ASK QUESTIONS

– Art and Commerce are fiddly, uncomfortable fuck-buddies, they’re always fucking, but they’re always fighting too — but that doesn’t absolve you from cleaving only to the art and failing to learn about the commerce side of things

– You’re never dead in this industry until you stay dead, otherwise, get up, claw your way out of the grave, write the next book, change your name if you have to, change an agent, change genre, whatever; you do it because you love this thing and being undead is cooler than being regular dead

ANYWAY

There is probably shit I’m missing.

Feel free to ask questions — I may not get to them quickly, as I am dealing with lots of LIFE STUFF right now. (I wrote this post in a bit of much-needed down-time.)

If you like this post, and find it helpful, don’t buy me a cup of coffee.

Buy WANDERERS. Or tell your friends. Or leave a review.

Lest I die starving and screaming in a lightless abyss.

[yooniegalaxy]

Okay, so this is going to be fun. So the preface behind this is that V got a few asks about this and then I went and straight up threw in my two cents... and in return got these asks. Instead of fuming about it and just keyboard warrior-ing back at the person ( using person as a very loose term at this point ) I decided to take a step back and deal with this rationally.

Trigger Warnings // Abuse, Assault, R*pe and Predatory Men Mentions. Public Masturbation. I will tag appropriately.

I apologize, in advance, for the length. I also haven’t proofread this because at some point I just didn’t care enough to re-read. Yes, I did cite things. Don’t @ me about it.

Alright, so this is very bold of you to assume that you know anything about my culture as it is. There are more than just that one reason as to why Korean women/girls aren’t dating ( which is also very bold of you to assume ). There is a great divide in everything. South Korea is a very patriarchal society, so of course there are privileges to being a man. But that can literally be said any where in the world. The world is intrinsically male oriented, despite having various matriarchal societies.

If we are talking about Korean women in general, there are a lot of reasons why they don’t date aside from the inherent fear. It is literally the fact that everyone pays attention to their careers first. School is a very large part of Korean Society, as well as a lot of other Asian Countries. Education is the first and foremost for a lot people, which often pushes the bounds of women when do decide to date, if at all.

“It says so in an article“, is not a great defense, especially since the only article I could find about this was a CNN article ( feel free to read it here ). While well researched, it is under the lens of a University study for a “Gender and Culture“ class taught at Sejong University. They do go into statistics about economic strain and what percentage of age groups are single and may not be dating.

I pulled this from the article, “[a] growing number of South Koreans are shunning romantic relationships amid economic hardships and societal problems.“ This, in and of itself, counteracts your broad strokes claim. The fact of the matter is that you clearly don’t understand how expensive it is to date anyone or live in Korean society. Even going out with friends is awful, I find, because we are always drinking and heading to the next bar or the next and you’re no fun unless you go to all of the bars. If you ditch, you are literally called no fun and you can kiss your social life goodbye.

South Korean Culture is very much about group dynamics and it is social suicide not to hang out when asked unless you have a VERY good reason. This brings me to, “[t]he country's overall unemployment rate last year rose to its highest level in 17 years, at 3.8%. The youth unemployment rate was far higher, at 10.8% for those aged 15 to 29.” This is basically the fact of the matter, dating and socializing unless you are getting funded by your parents, is EXPENSIVE. Even when you are out of University and starting your first job, if you are even hired. If you aren’t, you will be working any form of shop job, construction, retail or food and service. 

Side note: minimum wage in South Korea is 7530 won/hr, or like 6-ish USD, but not a lot of places even pay that. They pay under that.

Yes, in the light of a lot of Korean scandals and lot of word of mouth about x boyfriend or y abuse incident, many people are put off by the idea of dating. But I feel like this is the case everywhere and not just South Korea. You could even say that it is taken less lightly elsewhere in the world than it is in South Korea.

You also have to realize that this article is literally just talking about Korean Women dating Korean Men. There are a plenty of other races that live in South Korea that are ex-pats, are studying abroad or are teaching abroad ( as they don’t really like hiring people of Asian Heritage to teach English, especially ). A lot of South Koreans hire a lot of foreign specialists for jobs due to the high specializations in some fields. So Korean Women might not be dating Korean Men, but they are still dating.

This is not a “not all men” statement because I will never make that statement. “Not all men” is such a stupid statement because it is inherently bias. 

Korean dating culture isn’t dead. People still date. People still count their relationships in days and have cute anniversaries. People are allowed not to feel safe. I don’t feel safe and I live in a country where I am allotted freedom and yet I still look over my shoulder because off the gender that I was born as. 

CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE AT THE DOOR. 

Please don’t ignore the fact that you are generalizing a whole population to suit your own arguments and needs. You are literally doing yourself, and everyone you are generalizing, a disservice.

Honestly, no. Claiming you are right is actually a rather sad way to try and win an argument when someone hasn’t responded. My country isn’t “full of predators”. If anything all of my experiences in the United States ( and other countries though I will only give one example ) sort of tells me otherwise. I, personally, have a lot of stories of where I have felt unsafe in countries outside of Asia.

NEW YORK CITY ( tw: male public masturbation, aggression )

I was about nineteen at the time of this incident. I am, by no means, a person who is uneducated or idealistic in anyway. I was raised a realist, someone who wasn’t exactly sheltered from the storm, despite growing up in a traditional family. I made a lot of mistakes as a kid but I learned from.

In New York, I was with one other person. She was around my age and we were exploring the city together and I believe we were going to a conference at the time? I was studying Film at the time and she was a good friend of mine going to New York Film Academy. We hopped on the subway because literally the only way to get around the city unless you want to be stuck in traffic. What I experienced on the train was varying degrees of traumatic but I laugh about it now?

We were chased off the subway four or five stops before we actually wanted to get by a guy literally masturbating directly in view of us. There weren’t that many people on the subway car and he was making DIRECT eye contact with us while were talking about the film we were shooting for class. He was literally dirty talking at us and his advances became more bold until he literally chased us off the subway when we tried to leave.

He couldn’t have been more than I want to say thirty or forty and he was white male privilege. He was wearing a decently fitted suit with shined loafers so, clearly not just a homeless man on the street.

He chased us up to street leave with his dick out, ejaculating at our shoes as we tried to climb the stairs and told us we were ungrateful and deserved it. This happened on three separate occasions in a span of a week, different men.

I was much younger than most people that this happens to on a regular basis in the US. Tell me how “my country” as you call it is full of predators when this is what I was subjected to as a person that, at the time, is older than a solid chunk of the frequenters of this site.

Not only that but I have never felt the need to check my drink as much as I do in a western country as I do in an Asian one. I have been to frat parties and have been witness to college r*pe culture, to where I have been made witness to various friends being roofied because they don’t check their drinks. I was taught as a kid not to leave your drink lying around and if you did, you didn’t drink from it ( I should point out that I grew up both in Seoul and in Canada ).

I don’t feel safe in any country for the fact that I AM A WOMAN and not because of any racial bias that I might have. I don’t have the privilege of walking wherever I like without being cat called fully clothed, not showing any skin or figure. I constantly look over my shoulder when I see a shadow, this is not one country’s problem, it is every country.

Like I said, I was at work and would rather not get fired for interacting with someone that doesn’t take my priority because they wish to remain anonymous and not have educated argument. Rather you would like to anonymously bash a whole nation in which you are NOT apart of. Not that I particularly like my job, it kind of just pays the bills.

[peckhampeculiar]

Master of the arts

LOU SMITH WAS INTERVIEWED ABOUT THE PECKHAM PECULIAR BY BBC BREAKFAST ON THE DAY OUR FIRST ISSUE CAME OUT.

The local artist and screenprinter, who is the man behind the famous “Made in Peckham” design, tells us more about his creative career

WORDS: COLIN RICHARDSON; PHOTO: PAUL STAFFORD

Lou Smith is one of those enviable people who seem to be able to turn their hand to anything and do very well indeed.

Lou is an artist, jeweller, sculptor and screen-printer. He’s a photographer and videographer. He’s been a maker of bespoke, high-end furniture. And he’s a children’s party organiser, candyfloss-maker and indoor pyrotechnist.

What he’s not, though – and he is the first to admit it – is a self-promoter. “I’m a bit lackadaisical on the self-promotion front,” he admits, “so these things just seem to happen, not because I’ve promoted them. If I had promoted them, I don’t know what position I’d have been in.” Or to put it another way: “The thing is, I do too much stuff.”

Lou was born in Leeds. “My father was a geologist,” he says. “He used to take us on regular outings into the wilds of Yorkshire, which instilled in me a deep love of nature. My mother was very artistic, but, as was so often the case in those days, she stayed home and looked after us. There were three of us, so it was pretty much full-time.

“She’d always be doing something – painting for instance – and she taught me how to cook and sew, the things I would need later. My dad taught me all the hammering and sawing kind of skills.”

When Lou was 14, his father’s job was relocated to London and the family upped sticks and moved to Uxbridge. “It was tough,” he recalls. “In London regional accents weren’t popular in those days.”

He got on, though, achieving three science A-levels and going on to Imperial College to study biochemistry. Then, halfway through his studies, he fell ill and was hospitalised. When he recovered, he went travelling before returning to college, but later dropped out.

After abandoning his formal studies, Lou moved away from science and towards art and design. He rekindled his passion for nature, which is reflected in his photography and jewellery. He took up video-making. And then he got together with his friend Roy Middleton, who had trained at Camberwell Art College as a fine-art metalsmith.

“For years, we worked together as a team doing really nice bespoke interiors for commercial premises and houses,” he says. They worked on three houses for Channel 4 series Grand Designs.

But eventually, Lou reached the point where “I saw I didn’t want to be doing this in 10 years’ time.” In any case, the work was drying up as people tightened their belts in the face of economic austerity. So Lou cut loose. And having done so, he came up with a design classic that moved his career in yet another direction.

“Made in Peckham” is one of those ideas that is so fiendishly clever that you wish you’d thought of it first. Indeed, many people seem to think they have. Lou has recently discovered that his iconic image has been appropriated by a wide range of businesses who use it to promote their enterprises without so much as a “by your leave”, never mind an “and here’s a little something for your trouble”.

You’re sure to have seen the image yourself. It’s so much part of the culture of Peckham now that it’s almost as though it has always been here. The image is of an SE15 street sign with the street name replaced with the words, “Made in Peckham”. And perching atop the sign, bending down as if to peck at Peckham, is a large black crow.

To start with, Lou screen-printed the image onto T-shirts. A friend of his had opened a clothes shop on Bellenden Road and she offered to sell his T-shirts. “She sold hundreds of them,” Lou says. “I couldn’t print them fast enough.”

Since then, the range has expanded to include mugs and, among other things, hotpants. Lou has produced lampshades screen-printed with images of creatures from his nature photography, which are also available as framed prints.

He makes everything in his studio in one of the railway arches on Blenheim Grove. How long he’ll be able to continue doing that is a matter for conjecture. Last year, his rent was increased by 80 per cent, backdated for two years, and he anticipates further rises later this year. He laments the fact that once-affordable spaces are being priced out of the reach of many artists and craftspeople. “It’s killing experimental art,” he says.

For several years, as well as selling through local shops, Lou sold his merchandise at street markets and events like Pexmas. At the moment, though, he doesn’t have any retail outlets and is keen to hear from anyone interested in stocking his wares.

In the meantime, he welcomes enquiries via his website or through Captured on the Rye, the shop on Pellatt Road in East Dulwich that he co-owns with his wife. It used to be Jack’s Cafe. The coffee machine is still in situ and “occasionally, the ghost of Jack’s can be seen from the original vinyl that they had on the window,” says Lou. “When it gets breathed on, it illuminates a crown with ‘Jack’s’ written on it. I started retailing my Made in Peckham stuff from the shop, but people didn’t really understand: why is it in East Dulwich?”

Lou’s wife, Lorraine Liyanage, is founder of the Dulwich Music Festival and runs her SE22 Piano School from the shop. Between lessons, Lou turns it into a party venue for children.

“I did some summer screen-printing workshops for the London Wildlife Trust,” he says. “It was then that I thought, ‘This could be a good business’, because children love to make their own T-shirts.”

Lou runs two types of parties: artistic ones, focusing on screen-printing, and science ones, which involve explosions and white lab coats. “The kids come and dress up in them and wear specs and make slime and bath bombs and fire little cannons at one another. And we do spin-painting and pyrotechnics and candyfloss-making.”

As if all that weren’t exciting enough, Lou says, casually, “I’m also a champion of the underground music scene in London. That’s one of my biggest things, actually. It doesn’t pay very much, though.”

He has made videos for a number of bands and has an extensive collection of photos taken at gigs. One day, he hopes to stage an exhibition of them...

So yes, Lou Smith probably does do too much stuff. But he does it damned well.

[deathspeaker]

At a loss..

So my father died in February and I’ve been struggling in many ways. Financially is the most obvious one as lack of money is basically my #1 issue.

My rent is 1,100$, I don’t have to pay it for a bit because of my father’s life insurance going to that. But food stamps got cut in half in my state (Because hunger is a great motivator as republicans like to point out) and with summer coming in full force my power bill is going out of control.

On top of that I have to pay other bills, water, internet, cellphone, fuck I’m stuck paying off my father’s phone that we got in January and they wouldn’t let me return it because the 30 day period had passed. So I have this phone that’s useless to me that I can’t do anything with till it’s paid off. I can’t even delete the line until it’s paid off!

So I went out and got a job. It’s for a hardware store (the blue one) and while I love the job it turns out my store manager is the worst manager I’ve ever met in my life. She’s basically driven away more than half her employees and is struggling to replace them with new ones. Everyone there hates her guts. She is incredibly disrespectful and tries to find excuses to yell at her employees, often about nonsensical things (like about me ‘not finishing my list’ which my manager hasn’t updated in 5 days so... you know... BEEN DONE) or ordering me to restock things that we are out of stock with. I nearly walked out of the job the second she rolled her eyes at me.

But she’ll likely be fired in the next few weeks.

The other issue is that I told them I am disabled and can only work 6 hour shifts. But the memo didn’t get passed onto the person who makes the schedule who decided I need to be given 8-9 hour shifts. I had to take a day off (for a total of 3 because I was scheduled off the day before and after the day I took off) because I was in so much physical pain. I’ve rested for 3 days now and I’m still in great pain. So I’m going to have to tell them to change my hours because it will literally cripple me to keep working those long of shifts.

I actually legitimately enjoy the job, my co-workers and the customers, it’s just the whole... risking being crippled and an abusive shitty store manager.

I’ve been looking at other jobs (in case the store manager sticks around for some strange reason) and I’m just... floundering... I do NOT want to fucking work 40 hours a week and be left with virtually no time to myself, and I’m only being paid 14.33$ an hour which is practically a joke. I don’t know what career to look into, what kind of job I could possibly manage.

I’m am legitimately GOOD at retail work, I can handle customers very well and know how to talk to people of all walks of life (fuck I’m learning Spanish so I can help the Spanish speakers who come into the store!). But retail work tends to just... pay shit.

But I have no education past high school, I have a variety of skills and I’m very computer literate and a fairly fast learner but so many jobs want so much from their employees. Like, I saw a fucking listing that demanded an associate’s degree for a sales job. Why would I need a fucking degree to sell kitchen cabinets? I could do that in my fucking sleep. And yes, it was a requirement.

How does an autistic, disabled person with no higher education even find a job that pays well enough to allow enough free-time to not be soul crushing and to survive semi-comfortably on.

I’m really struggling with the whole... will to live.

[kitty084]

Worthless (Shawn Mendes imagine)

Authors Note: Okay this is my first try at doing an imagine. I think mine is a little long, but I’ve been wanting to try writing one for a while. Hope you all enjoy and let me know what you think of it. Can’t wait to read your responses. Also, I listed to the SAD LOVE SONGS playlist on Spotify while writing this so if you want the full effect, listen to this while reading it. All the things that are in this story is something I deal with on a day to day basis and it’s really personal to me. Hope this helps others out there who feel unloved. P.S. Happy Canada Day! Thanks. Lots of love. xx

I thank the driver as I hop out of the uber, handing over the $30 fee. Walking across the street to my apartment complex I let out a yawn. I slide the key in my door and turn the handle. Swinging the door open I step through the doorway and lock it behind me. My backs aching and my legs feel like led after working 8 hours at my dead end job. I make my way to my bedroom, throwing my bag onto my bed and pull out a clean towel from one of my drawers. Slipping off my shoes and socks I head to my ensuite, turning on the shower. While I’m waiting for the water to warm up I peel my clothes off and assess my skin. I know my eczema’s getting bad again because I had to vacuum the skin flakes off my bed this morning, and it’s starting to stick to my clothes. So I’ve gone back to using the steroid creams and doing my wet wraps twice a day. I’ve had eczema ever since I was a baby. It went away for a while, but came back in high school and it’s still here at 23. The waters finally warm enough so I step in a let it run across my skin. 10 minutes later I pat myself dry and wrap my hair up. I slip on a pair of shorts and a tank top. Pulling four bandages out of the bathroom drawer along with my cream I get to work. While I’m putting on the three different creams, I sit the bandages in warm water in the sink and let them soak. Once I’m all creamed up I start wrapping my legs and my arms and then I wrap a towel around my legs as I sit on the cold bathroom floor, resting my arms on my legs. Then I tilt my head back against the cupboard and let the tears fall, sobs wracking my body. Along with my eczema I had depression and anxiety which made matters worse. It doesn’t help that I’m dating Shawn Mendes. I love him, of course I do, but it hurts when he’s on tour. He can’t be with me and I hate that. I constantly felt like a failure and hated how I looked. My anxiety prevented me from leaving my bed some days. I’ve made some pretty big mistakes in my past and I constantly felt worthless. I hear a bang, but I’m pretty sure it comes from my noisy neighbours. I have to catch public transport all the time because I can’t drive. My retail career isn’t my dream job, but I’m not qualified in anything else because I dropped out of university. It’s not fantastic, but it pays for my rent and bills. Most people don’t understand how hard it is to deal with eczema. They take clear skin for granted and that annoys me so much. “Baby?” I hear from outside the bathroom door “You in there?”

“No”, I say my tears although they’ve stopped still make my voice wobbly.

“Y/N, are you okay?” When I don’t respond the door swings open and Shawn is there in the doorway. “Oh, love” he says before rushing over to me to gather me in his arms. “Shh, its okay, I’ve got you”. He pulls away to place his hands on my cheeks to wipe away the tears that stream down my face. Leaning forward he plants a sweet kiss on my forehead, “come on, let’s get you cleaned up”. Shawn un-wraps my bandages and helps me rub moisturizer on my skin. “You okay to do your hair?” I nod still numb, even though the tears have gone. He gives my hand a squeeze before walking into my bedroom. After I’ve finished drying my hair and putting the dirty clothes in my hamper, I find him laying out a long sleeve top and some sweatpants. He respectfully turns around while I change. “Okay, I’m decent” I say. Shawn turns around pulling off his favourite hoodie and sliding it over my head. I pull my arms through the sleeves and slide on some clean socks. “You want some water?” I’m still too numb to talk, so I nod my head and follow him into the kitchen. He fills a glass up and hands it to me, watching as I take small sips. We walk into the lounge room and I sit on the couch next to him, placing my glass down on the table. I look down, fiddling with my hands in my lap, until he gently takes them in his. “Y/N, baby, what’s wrong?” he asks with concern, sliding his thumbs over my hands. I shake my head and refuse to look at him, until he releases a hand and lifts my chin to my eyes meet his “talk to me”. My eyes start to water

“I…” is the only thing I can get out before I break down again. He wraps both arms around and pulls me onto his lap, letting me cry against his chest. “Shh,” he says as he rubs my back in gentle strokes “just take your time. Follow my breathing. That’s it”. Once I finally get my breathing under control and the tears stop I pull back to look at him. “Hey” he says tucking a stray hair behind my ear, with a small smile on his face. “You ready to tell me what’s been going on in that pretty little head of yours?” I take a deep breath.

“Yeah. I’ve just had a stressful day and I panicked. Sitting in the bathroom before, I couldn’t help but feel guilty about doing this to you”

“Doing what to me love?” he asks in confusion, eyebrows drawn

“You have to look after me all the time, like I’m a baby. I can’t be a problem to you, because you have your busy music career. I’m worthless, I don’t deserve you’re love. I’m ugly, I don’t have a great job, and I can’t even do something as simple as driving. I just don’t know why you stick around anymore, when you could have someone less complicated.” I don’t look up at him as I finish, because I don’t want to see the judgment in his eyes that proves I’m right. I start to get up off his lap, but he grabs me around the waist pulling me back into him. He shoves his face in my neck and he says “don’t you dare” I can hear the anger in his voice and I feel him shaking. “Don’t you dare think you’re worthless”, He pulls away and takes my face into his hands “I want you to listen to me carefully, okay?”

“Okay” I say quietly.

“I love take care of you because I want, to not because I feel like you’re a little kid. I’ll never not want to take care of you. You’re never a problem to me; it’s my career that’s a problem. It makes me spend too much time away from you. I know you’ve made mistakes and it doesn’t matter to me how big or small they are because everyone makes mistakes. I know I sure do. I don’t care that you can’t drive or that your job isn’t amazing. Most importantly I don’t care that your skin isn’t flawless, you’re still the most beautiful girl in this world. I’m the one who’s not worthy of your love.” I place a hand on his cheek and peck his lips before placing my forehead on his “I’m sorry” I say

“No, I’m the one who should be sorry because it’s obvious I don’t say I love you enough and then you start thinking like this. I hate it when you get down like this. I want to be here for you all the time and I want to help you fight your battles. Fight your depression and anxiety. Be your hero. I love you, I love you with everything in me and I’ll remind you every second of everyday if you need me to”.

“Thank you. I love you to, my hero” I say with a giggle “you’re amazing you know that?”

“Not as amazing as you, beautiful”. He says with a big smile before leaning in and capturing my lips with his. I can feel the love in his kiss and I eagerly return it, wrapping my arms around his neck, while his wrap around my waist. We pull apart and he kisses the tip of my nose. “Now, Y/N my love, what did you want to do tonight?” I look at him in confusion

“Don’t you have to go to the studio tonight?”

“No, I called Geoff and told him that you need me tonight, and tomorrow you can come with me to the studio. I’m all yours” I grin at him and give him a quick kiss. “How about pizza and a movie?”

“You read my mind. I’ll go order and you can pick the movie” he picks me up and puts me on the couch so he can go make the call and I start to surf Netflix. I end up picking A Cinderella Story because it’s my favorite. A little while Shawn comes back with a big, comfy, blanket. “Pizza will be here soon, I’m just going to take a quick shower.” He says before passing me the blanket and giving me a quick kiss on the cheek. The pizza arrives and I serve it up along with two glasses of coke when Shawn turns the corner. I press play on the remote and he wraps his arm around me covering us with the blanket, while I snuggle into his side. “Cinderella story, huh”

“Yep” I say smiling up at him. Pretty soon the pizza’s gone and I feel absolutely content. I let out a yawn and I feel Shawn chuckle beside me. The movie finishes a few minutes later and he cleans up while I get ready for bed. A few minutes later he walks in, taking his jeans and t-shirt off, leaving him in only his boxers. He climbs in the bed beside me gathering me in his arms and we just look at each other. I take this time to play with his hair, fresh and still slightly wet from the shower, his curls sticking to his forehead. He closes his eyes and hums in response. My eyes are getting heavy and I let out a yawn. “Alright sleepy head, time for sleep”. Shawn rolls me over and pulls me tight into his chest, resting his face in the crook of my neck. He places a small kiss just beneath my ear. “Hey, Y/N”

“Yeah”

“I love you”

“I love you more Shawn”

“Not possible, I love you the most”

“Okay, you win”

“I know, because I’ve got the most amazing girlfriend”. And with that we drift of to sleep, me tight in his loving arms. I still had my insecurities and doubt, but knowing Shawn loved me for me made it a lot more bearable and I couldn’t be more greatful.

[bitchesgetriches]

Hey, BGR (sue me I acronymed it. Please don't.), What are your wise ways of making yourself financial secure before you hit 30? What's the best way to start financially at limited experienced 17-year-old who hasn't any have the knowledge of what to do on her own?

The fact that you’re even thinking about this at 17 means you win ALL THE AWARDS! Seriously, this is a great time to start prepping for your future, and you’re way ahead of the game by even reading finance blogs and trying to get your shit together.

Here’s our advice: 

Get a job. Right now. You can wait tables or work retail or do manual labor. Or you can start your own money-making venture: babysitting, yard work for your neighbors, tutoring, walking dogs, running errands for the elderly, selling crafts. Whatever. Just get an income stream that’s all your own and start adding to it aggressively. 

If you don’t yet have your own bank accounts, get them. You’ll want a checking account (where you can withdraw money regularly to pay for your expenses) and a high yield savings account (which will earn literally 1000% more interest than a standard savings account at your regional bank). We recommend Ally for a high yield savings account.

Start building credit. It’s harder than ever to get approved for a credit card, so at your age you might need to start with a secured credit card. That’s ok, as it’ll be a really safe way to build credit without living outside your means. Use it to buy gas or your bus ticket or another regular expense you have to pay for anyway. 

Create a budget. The easiest way to do this is to track your expenses and income for a few months. From there, you can see about how much you need to live on from month to month. Assuming you’re still living with your parents, your expenses should be very low. Put the rest of your income into your savings account. 

Think carefully on whether or not you’ll go to college immediately after graduating high school, or if you’ll take a year off to continue earning money and real world experience. There’s no right answer here--but I do think getting an education eventually will be incredibly valuable to you. And yes, I mean that literally, financially.

Determine the return on investment (ROI) of various college degrees and schools before you decide where you’re going to study. By which I mean: a degree in English might cost X, and the average job salary you can expect to earn by age 30 with that degree might be Y. Whereas a degree in Engineering might be Z, and the average salary $160,000 by age 30. If financial security by 30 is your goal, minimize your college expenses and maximize your potential earnings by choosing a field of study and school with a high ROI. I... didn’t do this. And I regret it.

Continue working after high school. Keep putting money away in your savings account even if you need to adjust your budget when you leave home. (I’m assuming you live with your parents now, and won’t after you graduate high school.) I worked as a nanny making $20 an hour all during college and graduated with enough of a nest egg to afford to move across the country and cover my expenses for a few months while I got my career going.

If you can avoid it, don’t buy a fucking car. They’re money pits. If you absolutely need one, buy used. Otherwise, public transit is your friend.

Embrace the roommate lifestyle. You’ll save more of your money and be able to afford a better lifestyle if you join forces with other young people after college. I lived with 6 people and 2 dogs in a 4-bedroom house my first two years after college and my rent and utilities were a fraction of what they would’ve been if I lived in a studio or one bedroom apartment by myself. 

Start a Roth IRA. This is basically the independent retirement account of choice for lower income people, and you can start one regardless of your employment status. You need $1,000 to start it, so save that up in your savings account, then transfer it over. You can’t touch this money until you retire, so factor that into your budget.

Join your grocery store’s loyalty program. It’ll give you access to sales and coupons non-members don’t have, and it costs you nothing. So without it you’re literally leaving free money on the table.

Live frugally. This means buying generic instead of name brand products, shopping at thrift stores, and being intentional about your entertainment costs. The hardest part here will be saying no to your friends when they want to spend a lot of money to hang out. Be strong. 

Stay healthy. Things like cancer, chronic disease, and accidents are beyond your control. But outside of these factors, if you treat your body well it will be much cheaper to maintain. So eat lots of vegetables, drink lots of water, and establish a reasonable exercise regime that doesn’t involve a gym membership. Barring the unavoidable, this will keep you healthy and out of the hospital... where they’ll bleed you dry of your savings.

Learn to cook. Sweet fucking crispy jibbers, you will save SO MUCH MONEY by making the majority of your food at home. Eating out is unnecessarily expensive.

Get a grown up job. Life isn’t fair, and the plain and simple truth of the matter is that some jobs pay more than others. If you made a wise choice on the ROI of your college education, you could be making a lot of money by the time you’re 30. Push yourself to apply for high paying jobs, even if you’re not 100% qualified. Get your foot in the door at companies in high-paying industries. You’ll start at an entry level job, but you shouldn’t stay there for longer than 2 years. And on that note...

Ask for a raise every 6 months. Studies show that people who ask for raises get them more often than people who don’t. So you have nothing to lose and so much to gain by asking, even if it’s terrifying and nerve-wracking. 

Keep applying for a better job. If you’re going to be financially flush by 30, you need to move up the ladder as quickly as possible. And this means job hopping your way to prosperity. Even if you’re employed, apply for at least one job a month that could increase your salary or put you on a direct path to a higher salary. Nothing will make your salary and career stagnant like staying in one place too long.

Use your company’s 401(k) and/or 403(b) program. If you don’t, you’re losing money in three ways. So just fucking sign up for it as soon as you’re hired. You won’t miss the little bit of money that’s not going to your paycheck. 

Don’t rush into marriage or children. If you want to get married or have kids, that’s totally fine. But there’s absolutely no need to rush, as both of these things come with all kinds of expenses. It will be monumentally harder to be financially secure by 30 if you have to do it with dependents or another person affecting your personal finances.

Stay out of credit card debt. Once you’re in your mid-twenties and you have a solid track record of paying bills, you’ll be in a much better position to apply for a regular credit card. I recommend you get a rewards card that offers you cash back or travel reimbursement (I have the Capital One Venture card and love it). BUT... you have to be responsible with it. Pay it off in full and on time every month and you’ll easily build credit without going into debt. 

That’s it for now. I’ve peppered this answer with links to longer articles on various topics for you to read. You’re going to be great, so...

[dacxiglobal]

I believe that purchasing crypto now is a once in a generation opportunity for wealth creation

I’ve spent most of my life in Sussex, and had a great childhood there, with my mum, a full-time stay at home mum, as was typical of her generation, and my Dad, a project engineer. Financially, my parents were very conservative, living within their means, and didn’t believe in debt with the exception of a mortgage on their home. In terms of decision making they definitely ‘played it safe’, whereas I’m more entrepreneurial and willing to take sensible risks for an upside! I also enjoyed working hard to play hard and developed a taste for a few of the finer things in life.

At school, I wasn’t a natural academic but stayed an extra year to get the qualifications that would bag me a decent job with a big company. My real forte was economics and commerce, so when I left school at 18 I got my first proper job in retail banking for Lloyds. I’d already had a school weekend job at WHSmith where I’d picked up some good social skills with customers, and learnt to be responsible and organised which was handy!

My career at Lloyds saw me promoted from being on the till then to back office, then eventually to a financial advisor, but I felt only being able to work with the Lloyds products was constraining. I, therefore, took a job in a financial services company, where I could work across more financial products, including pensions, life insurance, bonds, unit trusts and shares. It was great training for my own personal finances! I’d already seen that the wealth was concentrated in the older generation, and those who didn’t learn the necessary financial skills were left behind. I also saw the boom and bust of the 1980s and knew of many people in negative equity. In fact, when I purchased my first flat, I remember interest rates of 15%, unthinkable now!

I felt I had achieved all I could in financial services, and wasn’t interested in being a branch or area manager for the bank. A friend invited me to work in media, for a company with outdoor advertising spaces on the tubes and buses. I was seeking a more rounded commercial experience. I also liked that there was a commission element to the pay which appealed to the entrepreneur in me. It also enabled me to purchase my first buy to let property, near Gatwick airport, which despite costing £50,000 had a monthly rent of around £600 and thus had an attractive yield. A shame such returns are no longer available in the property market, hence me diversifying into crypto.

Around 2004 I started working in property investment to indulge my love of property and worked for the UK’s leading company in educating property investors. It is interesting to me that it can be quite challenging to learn about crypto, which is why I was very interested to be introduced to Dacxi by a long term business acquaintance and ate up all the free information that was offered!

I went on to work for another property investment business, and launched my own, and learnt a lot about packaging property, and always negotiating a discount. I would be modest enough to say I was OK at it as I was the top producer in two companies which were the market leaders! Of course, everyone wants to buy low and sell high, and I believe that purchasing crypto now is a once in a generation opportunity for wealth creation. One of the interesting responsibilities I was given in property was to set up a VIP advisory service for high net wealth customers. They were often interested in a variety of property investments including land, new builds, and overseas property. Spreading risk is certainly a good idea, and one of the reasons I have split my interests between property and crypto.

Crypto has been a crucial part of my personal wealth planning. I purchased earlier this year in the autumn and I am already 143% up. I’ve also talked to my contacts about Dacxi – when you think something’s great it’s hard to keep it to yourself! At my age, I am looking at boosting my retirement plans – the earlier I can stop working the better! Currently crypto outperforms all my property investments so I am planning on liquidating some of them to divert the capital to crypto.

In my opinion the outlook for crypto is very positive, and whilst I’m already comfortable, I am looking for crypto to make a serious change to my standard of living in the next 3-5 years. I am a bit car fan, I already own an Audi S3 as a “daily drive” and have a Porsche 911 Carerra 4s, but I’ve certainly got room in my life for an Aston Martin DB5 and a Range Rover Vogue or Velar. I also like the flexibility that crypto offers – much less hassle than running a buy to let property, which leaves me lots of time to go to the gym four times a week which is a key part of my health strategy. I also enjoy golf, holidays and nice meals, all of which require a certain level of cashflow.

In conclusion, property and crypto have been the cornerstones of my wealth strategy. Education and timing are everything, and I have been fortunate to benefit from being in the right place at the right time. If you are on the fence about crypto, do it now, before it’s too late – in my opinion, there are only a few years left to take advantage of it.

Dacxi is proud to support people on a path to prosperity with crypto. If you would like to find out more then please join us at dacxi.com. We’re here to help.