#could genuinely not stop smiling
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happy hang in there thurssssday people of thuesdayland!!
here is your weekly scheduled (yummy) hangku (hang in there haiku for the newborns)
What a joyous day.
Four days have already gone
Oh, Thursday is here...
#tursdaymood
#i saw coraline in theaters today!!!!#its my favorite move ever#ive seen it atleast 59 times since i was a kid#i used to have it on dvd#it was sooooo good on the big screen#i felt like a little kid on christmas#could genuinely not stop smiling#happiest experience in like the last 18 years ngl#woohoo!!!!!
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what can i say except
AAAAAAAAAAHHH
i got to meet jen back in april, and today i got to meet mark! the absolute EUPHORIA of those meetings, 2 life goals coming true that i never thought i'd achieve, within the same year, all without leaving my australian city.
when i met jen, i made her cry (unintentionally!) but it spoke volumes to me that our meeting had that impact. today when i met mark, he asked if he could take his own photo of the art i had him sign, which spoke to me just as much, and both of them seemed truly happy to meet me.
i know i said it when i met jen but wow my life has really come full circle now. it's fulfilling, but i can't help but feel kind of sad too because, now what? what can mean more than this?
tempted to finally finish a mass effect playthrough i started years ago and just have ALL the emotions today
#and because it's fresh on my mind let me tell you how super fucking nice mark was like wow#i knew he would be but genuinely he felt like a friend he was just so good to talk to and REMEMBERED ME AND MY ART#it was a truly wholesome experience BUT despite the fact that majority (all?) of the people that were queuing to meet him wanted to because-#of mass effect; my anxiety kicked tf in and i could barely speak to anyone and i'm so disappointed in myself for it#like even when i found some gale cosplayers. i asked for photos then immediately left because i didn't want to bother them#but like. that's what we're there for. what better place to meet and interact with people with such common interests than there#so i stopped myself from making friends BUT make no mistake it was a great time despite anxiety being a bitch#mass effect#oh and make no mistake i was overjoyed in those photos! i just literally can't pull a smile the way people normally can
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— SMALLVILLE, “Wither” (6.03)
#can't believe they danced together in a fountain and we didn't get to see it 😭#anyway I love the comfortable physicality of this scene#like lex talking with his hands while still holding lana's hand in the second to last gif#and the fact that they're both walking around the mansion barefoot#and their smiles!! (especially in gifs 2 and 6!)#(pretty sure this is the last time we really see lex genuinely smile like this... but that's depressing so let's not think about it)#(also I could obviously dig into lex refusing to admit that he's actually happy but hoo boy I don't have time for all that lol)#in my head time stopped here and nothing bad happened after this like that's it THE END#smallville#smallvilleedit#svedit#lex luthor#lana lang#lexana#sv 6x03#dcmultiverse#my gifs#I told y'all that I had a gifset from this ep floating around in my drafts somewhere lol#not pictured here: me fist-fighting the smallville lighting department in a denny's parking lot
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Woah just realized I never shared these aggie doodles here hang on 🏃
They're like a week old now I think, but I still like em. These were also done on an aggie with my partner while we were in call, and for a while they could not stop saying "erm, what the scallop??" so I ended up drawing Boris and Wally saying it too 💀
#cw: romance#smileforme#smile for me game#smile for me#dr habit#dr boris habit#boris habit#akikothefuzzball#aggieio#aggie doodles#wally darling#welcome home wally darling#erm what the scallop#is still so funny to me 💀#March genuinely could not stop saying it and ngl there were so many times where I also wanted to just say it non stop#they're so silly and I love them#mwah mwah 💕#also yes that is them on the grill...#asscheeks getting roasted and toasted#with a side of teeth because Habit wanted some#erm what the scallop?! 🤯
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sometimes i think about the fact my grandparents literally overnight just cut us off and im like. how did u even do that. does it torment you
#eeaao's 'how did you let me go so easily' moment. like i dont let myself even THINK about this too often#bc i immediately beat myself back with the 'if it's hard for you then imagine how hard it is for mum. her PARENTS cut her off'#but like. idk. my nan i couldn't give less of a shit about which is something i always find so interesting#bc even as a child with NO basis for it or any understanding of her behaviour both past and present i still wasn't Comfortable around her#like children are smart actually. i just Knew her vibes were off and i Knew my mum was weird when she was around#like i truly dont think i ever loved my nan even when she was a very frequent part of my life#but my grandad? i ADORED him. id see him multiple times a week and he's the kindest man ive ever met#and hannah what i told you about my mum saying certain people have magnetic auras THAT WAS ABOUT HIM#like i cant actually put into words what it was about him but people just wanted to know him and spend time with him#but he was weak and let my nan walk all over him and when push came to shove he chose her and now ive not spoken to him in 3 years#& i KNOW he loved me. he thought the world of me like it's a bitter unspoken thing between me & my sister that we KNOW i was his favourite#he used to buy me egg butties at agricultural shows when my mum said no and specifically ask for two eggs#he used to sit and eat his soup with me when he came over to do work at the house#he used to play with me. he used to smile all the time. i can so clearly hear the way he'd go ''iya [my name]' with his proper rural accent#or how he'd tell anyone who would listen 'she's tough as old boots that one'#and i could make him laugh like NO ONE else could and he'd light up and go 'give over' and he genuinely enjoyed my company#i KNOW HE DID. and i havent spoken to him in 3 years. he'll be dead soon#and i cant talk to my mum about it bc it's her DAD it is so much worse for her and i cant talk to my sister about it#bc she wasn't close with him like i was and she just shuts the conversation down and those are the only two people#who know my grandad and know what he meant to me so im just here like. he literally stopped speaking to me overnight#i stopped hearing from him i stopped meeting up with him im so so angry with him the love is still there i dont know where to put it now#why couldnt he stay. why did he pick her when she's a loveless void of inhumanity. why werent we enough#hella goes home#my grandparents on my dad's side are also not in the picture funnily enough but idgaf about them. she got that grandparentless swag
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It had to be him in the end. A long time ago, back in 2016 when I first started playing, I didn't like him very much. It was due to the way other people played him and abused him in-game. I much preferred other team members such as Soldier or Scout because they were easier to play as and easier for me to understand as a newcomer. However, when 2018 to 2019 rolled around, I began to change. My feelings for Demo picked up, although he was nothing more than a second choice to me at the time. Soldier was my main for the longest time, but as I played and got to experience what Demo has to offer, I ended up enjoying him a lot and that is what caused me to change my thinking.
This all ended up coming to a peak in late 2023. I was going through a major shift (without knowing it at first), a lot of things were fixing to change in my life and so was my identity in the context of the game. My memory is skewed due to all of the traumatic events of 2023, but I believe it was around the spring months that I began to spend more and more time with Demo, and I eventually ended up becoming decently skilled with him. Although I did love Soldier, I still do, I knew in my heart that it was time to hang up that title. I had found myself choosing Demo more, I found myself enjoying him more, and I even broke every single record I ever had by playing as him. When my breakup came along about a full year ago today, Demo was all I had. I became so bonded with him in those rough months, and when February eventually came around, I was able to recognize that I loved him dearly.
He's my beloved sweetheart. He helped me to get through things, he was all I had in my times of isolation and all of those cold, desolate nights deep in the war, in the trenches of heartache and isolation. It was incredibly easy for me to love him and care so deeply for him, he is the one person who drives me to do better and to be better, because if he can somehow find it in himself to be an optimist despite the hardships he's faced.. I want to learn that ability, too. It is because of my love for him that I've been working so hard to build myself back up, to allow myself to be gentle and sincere. He is someone worthy of adoration in my eyes, and I want to be the one lucky to adore and appreciate him for who he is..
#🔐|| private;#❤️|| him;#💌|| love letters;#I know this is a long one and will likely be annoying to read because my ramblings are sometimes incoherent#but I don't think anyone genuinely knows how much I have come to love adore and cherish this man#he was really the only comfort I had for the beginning months of my heartache#I just love him#his smile and his grinning and the way his voice sounds#how silly he can be amidst the emotional depth I know he has#he is my everything#I could say so much more but I will stop for now
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I was looking through my legos and I got very nostalgic for ninjago, it was my first fandom on the internet and while I have no interest in returning to the fandom, it still holds a very special place in my heart <3 so some sketches of my ex husband who influenced my name. The icy white guy Zane (and Echo Zane!)
Also, if any of y’all recognize me from deviant art where I was obsessed with him and hated every girl who came into contact, no you don’t. That never happened <3
#also the divorce selfie meme cuz I friggin love that meme#it fits#i wanna rewatch the first 6 seasons cuz they were amazing#after that I stopped caring#especially when they changed the designs#i mean they absolutely brutally destroyed Zane :(#what’s the POINT in watching anymore#gosh I could rant forever but I’m not gonna#i genuinely don’t want to get involved with the fandom again#but I do love the show itself#ninjago#ninjago masters of spinjitzu#zane julien#smiles sona#grunkle stan#he’s my divorce lawyer#also again. if you recognize me… my only excuse is that I was a middle schooler#and middle schoolers are stupid fhdkdbdkdbk
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Honestly? I truly believe Whitley would've had the prettiest smile if he wasn't smirking smugly all the time
#whitley schnee#Like a genuine smile from him could stop hearts me thinks#God when the fuck did I become such a simp#I reallly like smiley characters huh#rwby whitley schnee#rwby whitley#rwby
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I caught a sunset for you yesterday!
hi hello and happy timezones Taylor!! AAAAHHHH this is so pretty!!! i love how soft and gentle that pinkish orange-y sky is 🥺i think the street lights make it look even more magical. they almost look like stars that are within reach. 🥺
thank you so much for sharing your sunset with me, i appreciate it whole bunch!!! 💛💛💛
this is an old one, but i hope you enjoy this sunset with a rainbow 🌈
#I am genuinely trying to stifle a smile that keeps creeping up on my lips because if my family sees me#they won't stop teasing about why I'm smiling to my phone.#I could (and have) tried to explain to them why it means a lot to me that people see sunsets and#they think of me and that i don't care if that's dumb but it really fills my heart with so much joy#especially since we haven't been mutuals for that long. this really has me in my feels (positive)#i hope you're doing well <3#tonee's asks#invisiblerambler#sunset content for the Sunset Hoe™
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unrelated but i DO kinda feel guilty for my little crush for reasons i will not explain. but. yeah its wild over here tonight
#🍯#sfw#like he casually mentioned being glad he can have friends who dont expect it to become anything more and i felt ill#so. ill stop having THOSE feelings immediately lol#but i genuinely DO love him as a friend#n he said i was one of the first ppl he felt comfy writing with#and i. am soooo emotional 2night#my friends r so important 2 me and im never gonna say SHIT bc i love him as my friend wayyy 2 much#sorry im saying this here we r just mutuals on my main so. akdhsk#also we were talking abt potential meet ups the other day and i HATE living where i live. everyone else is soo far away#one of my friends is coming 2 the states soon n i will be a 10 hr drive away. thats fuckign miserable#the guy this post was originally abt and 2 of our other friends live close enough that he could drive 2 them. and its the opposite side of#the country#i wanna get 2 meet my friends so fucking BAD#like. i cant put it into words but i wanna give them hugs and see their faces when they smile and akdbdn#when is it MY turn to meet my friends irl#my shark
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@it-begins-with-rain replied to your post “little floof has the best possible time at con,...”:
I'm so incredibly happy for you!!!!! I love how loved you are at that con, and it's absolutely the amount of loved you should be!!!! You are such a wonderful and kind and shining soul, and everyone can see it and everyone looks forward to it every single year! And your Flower Eevee is perfection itself and I'm so happy you managed to get the flowers done in time because they're PERFECT!!!!!!!! Just absolutely perfect!!! I'm so happy you had a few days to find yourself again and decompress after the shitshow that has been the last year, and i wish con was an entire week long for you to just bask in complete and utter blissful fun and recharge!
SOBBING THANK U 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
i frequently feel like i'm Too Much at con sometimes, like my favorite guests would get annoyed at seeing me so much at all their panels/autograph sessions and asking for pics and stuff, but then they do things like call to me BY NAME in the hallways when i'm not even paying attention and haven't noticed them just to actually get me to notice them and say hi back, or ask me if i'm coming to their next show after each one that i go to, or share my ig posts to their stories thanking me BY NAME AGAIN for coming and specifically saying they were glad to see me again and i just cry and melt inside bc they are genuinely the sweetest they could possibly be to me and they certainly don't have to be but they ARE and it makes me feel SO warm 😭😭😭😭
ALSO THANK U FOR KIND WORDS ABOUT FLOWERY EEVEEEEE <3 so many people stopped me at con to tell me my dress was beautiful and so many people asked about it after they took pics and everyone was so impressed when i said i'd hand sewn them all on and said they looked like they were originally part of the dress which tbh is the highest compliment to me, thank u random con goers ilu so much
I ALSO WISH CON WAS AN ENTIRE WEEK LONG SO I COULD JUST BASK IN COMPLETE AND UTTER BLISSFUL FUN bc that's what con is for me every time and i need it fjeiaowfwae i at least sorta wish i'd somehow taken this entire week off after con LOL but the memories are good, the memories and the pictures will help take the edge off going back to work <3
#it-begins-with-rain#hello sorry it was ramble time#i do genuinely tell my friends at con a lot that i feel like i'm ridiculous about my favorite guests and that they just put up with me fjew#but like...if they were just putting up with me i feel like they wouldn't do all the things that they do!!#i know i gave these examples in my tags on original post but fejwaiof still!!!#i must not be too annoying!! HAHA#just SEEING them makes me happy#i watch every panel/performance and just can't stop smiling the whole time#idk i'm just filled with such a childlike sense of wonder and it's insta-smiles and i'm so happy#but to have them be so nice to me back??? more than i could ever ask for 😭💗#anyway i love con so much and i can't possibly explain in words how much this convention means to me but it really is my happy place#genuinely forget about all the shitstorm of issues swirling around irl and get to live in the happiest of bubbles for three-and-a-half days#these tags and this post are a mess L O L
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i dont like ebegging so often i worry about coming across as like a grifter but i genuinely cannot work because im certainly disabled but not disabled "enough" that id get proper accommodations for it...im hoping i can pivot to streaming to generate an amount of income until i find something that works but god. AGHHHH
#cosmo.txt#ask to tag#ik its an internalized ableism thing but living at home does not help#every time im like i need to wait until we find out whats wrong with my legs before i can work she does tbis like#Teacher Smile. like the one where theyre being passive aggressive#and shes like I Think You Can Work You Just Dont Want Ti#to*#there are so many fields id love to pursue if i could!!! i want nothing more than to be able to leave the house on a consistent basis!!!#if i stand up for too long my legs become unbearably itchy and sore and will not stop ubtil i sit down#and 'too long' often means 'a few minutes'#it genuinely hurts so much being told i'm too lazy to get a job when i want to work so bad i just dont#want to be mistreated
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it might not be so black and white now but eight really was. super mean back in his IA class story days. if he was still like that i think he would've eaten theron and lana for breakfast. he's unrecognizable to his old crew now. they're like who is this man. where is all the betrayal. the violence. the horror of it all. he's having brunch with them. he never did that with us. that's not playing fair, cipher
vector is most unnerved by alliance-era eight because he did used to want him to become kinder and softer back then but he's so drastically different now that he can't convince himself the person in front of him was the same agent he traveled with, who never let him in, who even kaliyo kept her distance from.
#swtor#ooc#i just. class story eight and alliance era eight (post) is so different in vibe#that it's a 180 turnaround#at his heart he's not so different#but post alliance eight is like. the trio of roommates with theron and lana that all share one braincell#and eight in class story was very much his own braincell. never shared it with anybody#difficult to parse harder to bond with and rather cold#all behind a genuine smile (your discomfort has no effect on him.)#keeper's rejection of him as a person was a huge catalyst but so was theron and lana's own rejections#to the point that everything blew up in their faces and now they're all unemployed with each other hence the casual goofiness#it's like if the guy you knew who regularly committed arson stopped to pick up poker as a hobby instead#ironically the better the relationship he had back then the worse it made him#bc no one could reach him and playing benign only enabled him further
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#I need to stop bring miserable genuinely likr...THIS IS SO SO SO SO dumb LITTERALLY i wanna beat myself to a blood pulp sbd not jn the hot#way :( like could my brain just stopp please like can we pack this up i cannot be having anxiety attacks 3-4 times a day#fuck man#FUCK i just hate being around other people so bad i hate it FUCKKK okay im done#god i just hate the staring and the smiling and the weird fake im forcing myself to talk to u voices and the your odd stares i hate it and#the whats wrong with u looks#whatevrt whatever#i know it's the fucking psychosis talking i fucking know but knowing doesn't make it go away and neither does meds#nothing makes it go away it only seems to keeo getting worse#idk#keeping me up at night for almost 4 months now insomnia kicking my ass
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If asked who his favorite person is, Kaeya will always say Klee. Especially if the girl happens to be in earshot
#hc; kaeya#//Thas it#//That’s the post nfjrb#//He adores the adorably destructive adventurous lil smol#//Y’know the I Will Protect This Smile meme? ye thas him about Klee#//She prolly never learns her lessons from solitary bc after she gets out; he IMMEDIATELY treats her to the best sweets and brings her gift#//V counterproductive#//The fact that he’s teaching her how to go under Jean’s radar doesn’t help either lmao#//He genuinely can’t ever bring himself to seriously scold her over anything#//He straight up saves a whole chunk of his salary for Klee spendings#//Treats; little knickknacks; clothes; ensuring funds for every little thing she could want#//Deffo has a playful (one-sided) rivalry with his favorite boi Bedo over who is her best big bro#//There’s no contest who; really; but that won’t stop Kae from trying jfhfh#//He once tried to use her to get under Diluc’s skin; talking about how he and Klee make the BEST Pyro-Cryo team#//That their Visions work so SPLENDIDLY together; like they were MEANT to be a team#//Knowing damn well how he griped about the incompatibility of his and Diluc’s Visions to his and near everyone else’s face#//But he felt absolutely awful about it afterward#//That’s not how you treat someone you consider fam; after all#//Though he’s not too pressed about feeling guilt on that when it comes to Diluc#//He’s a BIG STRONG BOY who doesn’t NEED Kaeya for anything; after all#//Luc prolly didn’t CARE enough about whatever he’d intend with that stunt; anyway#//For Klee; on the other hand; Kae willingly went and cashed in a good few vacay days to spoil her and make it up to her#//Not saying the reason why he up and did that to her or anybody#//Simply either citing it personal for others; and then to Klee bc he wanted to adventure with her#//No matter how hectic things get; he will NEVER let anyone or anything put a SCRATCH on Klee#//The moment she gets even the tiniest of injuries; he is goin on a Warpath#//Mans would want to raze the whole goddamn Abyss Order himself if any of them hurt Klee#//So her mess with 'Mr Fluffy' deffo cause him a Major Stress#//Absolutely SPOILED her after he found out (and after his Crisis) bc he wanted to reward her for killing it
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(runout of tags again I hate it here gotta bite the max ammount) #Also. I feel like Ward's perception of Oscar will be changing from now on #Yep. a bastard. a smart bastard. But let's be real. He can survive and get you out, follow him # Mhm. Cass I think I did mention that I was up for the story, because of what could possibly be in this story later # We reached the point where I open the door, close it from inside and throw the key in the window from 10th floor
Part 13 ;)
Oh no, they're roommates now?? Hope you're ready for the fluff, family dynamics, and chaos that follows~
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#OSCAR FLIRTING ON BOTH SIDES MMM#HOLLY BEING OKAY WITH IT MMM#I can't kind of see Oscar and Holly as a canon due to how they act and perceive things#I feel like Holly's character might accept Oscar as a working partner not as a “partner” ... I ended up thinking about gay drama after you#answered that ask guh pffht#Agree to let him hunt with them; get this badass suit#get Ward out of lab; get Holly with them#OSCAR'S HAPPY TURN WANTING TO EXPLEIN IT#Understanding that he will not like it PFFFHT#OOooh is this a little alien lizard#The rest time... look like some kind of room that is built like a sauna#EGHFGEHF HIGH RELATIONSHIPS welp you got it on yourself by making his brain this way. He definitely knows way#to measure her dumbassery#Oh Sculptor has been teaching her a few features huh. Was he some kind of teacher for her in the past? (And possibly still is)#HE DIDN'T KILL THEM OKAY. EXACTLY. WARD. YOU KNOW HE COULD SIT WITH YOU ALL OR BE DEAD#IT WOULD HAVE HELPLED YOU ALL OOOH SOO MUCHHH#I kind of... remember the characters that do talk villains to the extend where they stop killing anyone but I'm genuinely sure it might not#work with marmors (I keep wanting to call them marmons hhshh)#OH MY GOD THE COMPOSITION OF THE SAME PLOT WITH DIFFERENT POVS BEING EXPLAINED FROM THE SAME MOMENTS#I SO FRICKING OVE IT YOU HAVE NO IDEA SMOOTCH YOU#OKAY. THAT WAS NOT EXPECTED. I KIND OF EXPECTED THAT OSCAR IS PLOTTING SOMETHING BUT MMMM ECLIPTICA.#She is the ruler. Being dumb doesn't mean completely. Being dumb but not with the people. I love it.#GHSJFHGAAHGFAD MU***csd&*d** SFGASJH YESHJVMDX THIS SCENE F*** YES *THROW THE TABLE OUT* THE REFLECTIONOKAY#GOD YES. HE IS MNFGMVNMFN#I DON'T HAVE WORDS I JUST SIT THE STUPID SMILE BECAUSE IT IS. YES. HE IS A GOOD DANCER I AM CONVINCED. HIGH SOCIETY IS A CRUEL PLACE. VERY.#HOLDING A FACE AND BEHAVE IS ACTUALLY ALMOST A MENTAL TORTURE AND OSCAR IS BUILT FOR THIS#Ward... listen to him. He is currently the only way for the life not looking like a constant torture#Despite the fact that you all are roommates now#Also. I feel like Ward's perception of Oscar will be changing from now#inspiration
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