#convoluted aus my beloved

[bloominglegumes]

making my own food,,

[conceptuma]

Soooo how did your idea of dark being the captain started ? how different would his role be compared to the y/n captain in iswm ?

Alright... Let's get into it

Question 1: It actually started as a theory that I gradually believed more and more in a short span of time as everyone was consuming ISWM part 1, and when part 2 dropped, it both lead me on further, as well as disproved it. … (but really Markiplier's live stream on it disproved the theories for real) But that didn't really bum me out, because I had been ready from the start for it to not be true, so I just converted it to an AU, because I was projecting my own measure of story/characterization into it anyway.

Question 2: I don't have 1 answer for this! Either a complicated one, or one that enables any kind of headcanon… Answer A: The captain's choices and behavior doesn't change because we are sharing a body with Darkiplier('s parts) -- I just really like the idea of "What if we (D/A) stayed with Dark" and how that would be like a dramatized version of DID (of which I have! /info) of the "D/A" part (us) (…on top of likely forgetting the events of WKM due to AU stuff, but then remembering after gaining the multiverse abilities of the paradox…) forgetting or not knowing what Dark is doing in other timelines, (my favorite characterization idea of Cpt.Dark is that he's fronting in the routes where he throws Mark around or generally leads us to demise that might benefit him in the looooooong run- aka how he somehow canonically "finds" the paradox gem for the box at the post-credits) … while the Captain chooses to get along with Mark in other routes, doing something childish as sharing candy, which is much closer to my personal "D/A" characterization, not at all what Dark would be doing ahhaha

Answer B: If I wanted a timeline to occur differently from the "Canon" events of ISWM, to characterize Captain Darkiplier as separate from Canon Captain… well, Dark could just do about anything he wanted,

(from here onward is rambling, not relevant to the question!:)

… if he could .. If he somehow escaped the inevitability of the causality of meta-narrative events of what has and will occurred in ISWM via the writing of Market Plier- lol Kind of like how Damien and Celine can't outrun their fate or Actor's bullshit as seen at the end of DAMIEN, which I think holds some thematic power or significance over the future events after the "seal" is broken on the multiverse stuff- aka everything After WKM. … Mark has said a lot in live streams but one thing that stuck with me is how he explained the "timeline" noting that moment when Dark picks up the staff , as the exact moment where the events of DAMIEN is condensed. IIRC. And then for this AU I kind of added more onto that- AHWM ISWM ADWM could have happened in a condensed fashion similarly… The glass breaking in the first video of ISWM, the ice breaking in DAMIEN twice… The lines Head Engineer speaks at the canon ending mirroring the lines spoken by Damien and Celine at the end of DAMIEN… It's as if it's like, a loop, or pocket, or spiral, some kind of non-linear shape… Whichever way it is, I guess the most important point is that it's non-linear. I like to call it wobbly time (a theme in my OC's as well) It's not essential to consume nor understand a story by understanding how its universe works. After all, we as people in real life don't know how our universe is shaped. Is it infinite, or does it loop? (Can you tell I'm a bit autistic about space?) But the desire to adventure and discover what's out there is sometimes commendable and a beautiful instinct of human life… other times, not so much. We could all learn from Head Engineer's mistake. But yea, Dark is powerful but not God of this Universe powerful… I think it'd be funny that if Dark tried everything in his power to defy the laws of the universe, once he finally got a hold on the time paradox that literally allows him to traverse the multiverse to find any timeline that gives him an upper hand on his #1 Enemy, when he travels to literally the ends of the universe, Mark (The Real Life Author) is like "no" so Dark has to go back to the main story line (or at least close to it, there's plenty of legroom for fanon things to occur around the "main timeline") Dark's like "ugh fine" and completes the ending of ISWM like it's a videogame to gain back his agency splitting from D/A (You and your choices in the "videogame") again, and to get away from Head Engineer- even though he's one of the more tolerable Marks, I GUESS- (Frenemies trope x The Unlikely Friendship trope x Doomed trope, and some other dynamic or development that can't really be similarly labeled as a trope, which hopefully I will be able to share to everyone who will want to know about it) I also like to think that's why he's dangling the box in front of us in AHWM instead of actually using it for anything. He can use us to get what he wants quicker than by doing it alone. Using the anomaly gem in the box for his own needs a second time would not work nor worth the risk of ISWM 2.0

What I love about Markiplier's cinematic universe is that it involves both distortion of identity and distortion of time/space- anything and anyone can happen. I relate to it and my chaotic (and also very analytical and ""DeeP"") creative style is very compatible with it. :)

Thank you for the questions !! Feel free to ask as many questions as you like about what I said here if it didn't make sense, because damn it's compact. It could be explained better if paced out (or storytold?) instead of all dropped into one post heheh

[mbirnsings-71]

That is true I do love those fucking snails man THEY'RE ADORABLE OKAY IT'S NOT MY FAULT THAT IT'LL KILL ME IF IT TOUCHES ME-

also ALSO ALSO JUST JUST SOBBING AT YOU SO FUCKING HARD BECAUSE BCAUSCNDSVN SCARRRRR SCAR AND THEN SCENES FROM MY AU AND AND AND WOBBLY CRIES SO HARD- PLUS JIMMY JIMMY IN THE CORNER WITH GRIAN AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE BAMBOOZLER SCAR I'LL LOSE IT SO FAST JUST RU RURURURGUTURRUNBU I'M LOSING IT- I've lost the thread My brain is spinning around too fast AAAAAAAAAAA- YOU DREW THEM SO WELL AND I WILL KEEP SAYING IT I LOVE YOU RURU

ok!!! madi has seen which means all of tumbkr gets to see !! my various doodles done for christmas for @mbirnsings-71 my lovely buddy

half of these r just scar bc hes their fave but the kther half is scenes/just grian from their wedding planner scarian au :3

n also them as a snail bc she loves those fuckin snails

[burningcheese-merchant]

BurningCheese/GoldenSpice AU where Golden Cheese is sent back in time to when Burning Spice was still a hero (how? By Timekeeper. Why? Who knows? Maybe Timekeeper wanted to actually help people for once, albeit in this extremely convoluted and unconventional way. Maybe she was just bored and wanted to mess with time and people again. Maybe both. Who knows...)

Burning Spice is still beloved by the world as the Herald of Change, and by the Wild Spices as their strong, boisterous and kind-hearted leader. He finds her lost and confused (and far beyond angry) in the middle of Wild Spice territory by chance (or did Timekeeper drop her in at the right place and time on purpose?) and not only is he instantly moved to help her out of a genuine sense of altruism... but he's instantly smitten with her, too. So captivated is he by both her beauty and her personality, even while the latter manifests as "harsh" and "paranoid" when they first meet, that it's practically love at first sight.

So now Golden Cheese is stuck living amongst the ancient Wild Spices while she tries to figure out how to return to when and where she came from. She is also stuck dealing with Burning Spice on a regular basis, who now spends every moment of free time he gets by her side, pestering her (in her eyes). He's up front about his feelings and how he wants to court her, and does not relent even after she rebuffs him repeatedly ("doesn't take no for an answer" is a core personality trait of his across all time, apparently).

There she is, trapped in the distant past, completely alone save for the Wild Spices who are kind enough to take her in, desperately racking her brain day in and day out for a way to get back home, all while the man she'd previously only known as a threat to her and to the world at large is not only an unironically good person here and now, but is actively hitting on her every chance he gets.

Maybe she eventually calms down and learns to open up and get along with these people while she's there; she's stranded until further notice, she might as well (and they're so warm and friendly in this time; so unlike what she knows them to be in the future...). Maybe she realizes that she could perhaps change the future - even save it, if she dares to dream - by somehow stopping Burning Spice's descent into villainy before it happens.

...Maybe she ends up liking Burning Spice quite a bit, because it turns out he can be very charming when he's not behaving like a genocidal maniac. Not that she admits to that, at least for a while.

And maybe the Burning Spice in the future knows she's missing and does everything in his power to find out where (and when) she is, because he really will stop at absolutely nothing to have her and her Soul Jam in his grasp again.

This is, like, the 5th AU to infect my brain and it's the dumbest one so far. Send help and asks because I'm already trying to prep and cook stuff for this thing, and I want to hear what y'all think

[reineydraws]

Is the renkaza a crackship?

nope! on ao3, they're the third biggest kny ship and the biggest kyojuro ship, actually--not that popularity automatically means a ship can't be crack? hm.

the definition of crackship is debateable lol but to me they're not cracky 'cuz the things akaza was saying during their mugen train fight and akaza's human backstory provide a lot of give in terms of connection points to kyojuro.

they're a ship for all the people who love enemies/rivals-to-lovers plots, and ships that involve a lot of physical fighting and/or searching for humanity, which are some of my fave things to look for haha. they can also just be deeply convoluted and toxic when romantically involved, which is its own brand of fun! (tho i personally tend to look for stuff that ends more wholesomely. angst with a happy ending my beloved. 💞)

i will say that while they're not a crackship, the au's where akaza just fucks off completely (like my au comic haha) or where kyo goes all-in on being a demon right away can come off cracky, but i think that's less "crackship" and more "crack taken seriously".

i hope this makes sense!

[inexplicifics]

Hi , hello, I had the most convoluted and insane AU crossover idea when I was cooking dinner earlier. We already had Ciri's Magic Gone Awry: Time Edition. Now get ready for Ciri's Magic Gone Awry: Universe Edition! Basically, Ciri manages to yoink AND mix & match game canon, Warlord AU, and Wolfblood AU versions of Lambert and Milena, completely switching pairs and universes, resulting in: (1/2)

Mix & Match AU (2/3) • (Game) Canon Lambert + Wolfblood Milena to Warlord Universe = Lambert learns how to heal and have good things again, even when things are terrible. Also, he gets to have closure with Aiden. • Warlord Lambert + Canon-setting Milena to Wolfblood Universe = Milena gets to learn what it's like not to be a Good Noble Daughter and learn that, maybe, there could be a Witcher out there who loves her when she's fierce and stubborn. Mix & Match AU 3/3. • Wolfblood Lambert + Warlord Milena to (Game) Canon Universe = "Hey, you're not my beloved, but this place sucks, wanna see how much shit we can fuck up in order to get societal improvements before we get sent back?"

Those all sound like glorious chaos, I love it.

Wolfblood Lambert + Warlord Milena would cause such problems for everyone else in game canon 'verse. Just...so many problems. Probably a lot of dead kings.

Game canon Lambert would have...so much trauma. So much. Poor bastard.

Warlord Lambert in the wolfblood 'verse would spend so much time looking at his counterpart and going, "A redhead? Really? In this timeline I'm a redhead?"

[yestrday]

the first thing I think of when Reader is portrayed as naive and innocent in an AU is how in the future they’re worse then all their hybrids combined, and I’m getting some major brainrot over the hybrid AU so just hear me out here ‼️‼️

Reader was of course innocent and naive, sheltered in every way, but that was before their father suddenly decided that playing the role of a doting father in public would boost his dying image more then keeping reader locked up

So Readers thrust into the life of an heir, forced to come to grips with the cold harsh reality that is the business world, and realize that they’re never going to have any true power or freedom as long as their father is still around

So they plan and scheme, analyzing their fathers greatest achievements and his worst failures, learning all about how to play the business world, and people in general, like a fine tuned instrument. Just patiently waiting till their fathers gradual cover ups over the years suddenly make their way into the public eye.

And when it’s revealed that Readers parent abandoned them and then picked them up again for his entertainment, forcing them to turn to mere hybrids for genuine human interaction?

Well, both those concerned for Reader, and those not, take note. Suddenly investigations are happening and their fathers tax fraud and million dollar bribes are revealed, and oh what’s that, he’s also involved in multiple different crime organizations? How horrible

Reader miraculously finds themself to be the CEO how every company that their father had, an owner of all of his properties, and immeasurably rich beyond belief when their father dies in jail under simply tragic circumstances.

Only this time, Reader won’t let the opportunity to take the world by storm pass by. After all, they have a rather beautiful collection of hybrids waiting at home for them, and you know how clingy beloved pets are when you make them wait.

You cant blame the poor darlings though, the public whispers behind lustful gazes and adoring stares, they just can’t get enough of their powerful owner

actually anon this ask (which has been fermenting in my ask for a year now) has been the inspiration in why there's been a whole heir sub plotline in my hybird works.

i like the idea of the hybrids subtly corrupting the innocent bird that's been in their cage for far too long, now able to spread their wings but just doesn't know how. they feed darling whispers about how their parent abandoned them, how they're the only family they have. and all of them are oh so eager to follow reader's convoluted schemes to bring down their father and the company's enemies.

i find that corrupting darling would have many benefits to the hybrids. one, well, corruption arc? it would be just so lovely to see your naivety crushed and broken, making you rely on them not as your protectors but also as your fellow sinners in this plan. two, since you're so influential, you'll be able to at least influence society's views on hybrids. you'll be in a high enough position to influence lawmakers to loosen their binds on hybrids, to make hybrids equal... idk, just a thought.

this only applies to zhongli, since he's bound by a contract to your father, but this could be the perfect opportunity to revenge. what better way to take revenge on the man who coerced you into a humiliating contract than watch his own flesh and blood (who he does love despite all his callousness) impeach him from his throne and throw him into jail. it's perfect. plus, he'll be able to spend freedom with you forever and ever <3

[kakishirocream]

Breaking down a bad Frisk and Chara analysis

Honestly, in my opinion this has to be one of the worst analysis on Frisk and Chara

Im not going to elaborate on the AU “Stand In” much. All you have to know is that its vile like all fr*ns aus are, convoluted, and a bland sci fi romance with undertale painted on. Anyways onto my point. And yes, this was made back in 2016 but the OP still believes in that fanon.

They arent a goody two shoes, theyre far from it and they can be sadistic and they dont do things because its good, they do things because “i need to know” “i have to” and does things for fun

Yes, the last image can refer to the Player but in universe it talks about Frisk. This isnt deltarune and undertale’s meta is completely different from deltarune because in undertale the player is non diegetic (well at least until the true reset where the player has a role.) while in deltarune the player is diegetic and the meta is more “in your face.” Yes you can bring up Flowey talking to “the player” but thats supposed to be ambiguous about who he is talking to and honestly it is kinda irrelevant if Chara is talking to Frisk or the player at the end of the geno route because again its a in-universe vs out of universe thing. Keep in mind that Undertale isnt necessarily a meta game (aka knows its a game, etc) its a game with Meta themes and things like resets, etc are an in universe thing that can be explained in universe.

Yes, Frisk and Chara represent a mindset of a player but not in that way.

Frisk is not “mercy” they are completionism, curiosity, emotional attachment (which can be perverted sentimentality), child like wonder, and the memories you cherish and the joy you have from playing the game, enjoying heartfelt stories and characters you grow to love. The memories you cherish and the joy transcends video game metrics and number based rewards.

However again like mentioned Earlier, Frisk has no morals whatsoever and does things because they're curious and does things for fun even things that are depraved and disgusting.

Chara not just “fight” they are your True RPG character and their name is whatever you want. Theyre the representation of the addiction to number based rewards and the desire to reach “the absolute.” Theyre represented by the number 9 the final single digit number.

Even in the pacifist route there is that feeling of wanting a number based reward. Even by just wanting more GOLD they are that feeling.

*sigh*

OF FUHCKING COURSE YOU ARE ALSO TRYING TO JUSTIFY YOUR BELOVED SHIP BY MAKING THINGS UP AND SEVERELY MISCHARACTERIZING AND MISSING THE POINT.

Again, Chara is the addictive feeling to numbers going up in games however they are not that’s doing the murders nor they even want to kill monsters until the end. Again, Frisk is NOT the innocent uwu bean, they are pretty much as just as responsible because they have the right mindset to even ensure the geno route is possible from the very start as mentioned. Also, i have to bring up the fact the player is non diegetic in UT AGAIN like i had to bring up previous points again.

Im not gonna bother diving into the au parts of the analysis, just the OPs thoughts on what they think the meta is. The last part just completely gets frisk‘s personality wrong. They are NOT introverted and Quiet

Thank you for reading, im concluding this thread. PLEASE do not harass the OP because it will cause more harm than good

These docs by @lazynickname would be useful if you want to know more about frisk and chara.

[gojonanami]

I'm having a thought and I'm smacking you with it; Western AU where Satoru and Suguru are basically co sheriffs and Suguru has a thing going on with a cute gal from one of the biggest ranches in their community. The girls dad is a bit over protective since he lost his wife already and there was def a moment where Suguru was chased off the property after the dad caught him in bed w his daughter/reader, inspite that she ends up pregnant

Suguru decides to try and ask for the father's blessing, unfortunately he arrives on the property that faithful day to find everything in disarray, the father and younger siblings are dead and his love is missing.

Suguru being Suguru, spirals as a result, and it gets worse when he learns people turned a blind eye to the chaos on the ranch that day to protect themselves and he starts to take the law into his hand as judge, jury and prosecutor and finds himself lacking the empathy he once had.

Yaga, the big boss, basically tells Satoru has to bring Suguru in now because he's a danger to himself and others. Suguru skips town because Satoru more or less gives him a warning to leave by sunrise because he can't bring himself to hurt his friend.

Suguru makes himself a name as both a terror and a hero over the years as he hunts down people from the group that attacked his beloved's family home, since they're causing problems everywhere in the west. ( he totally has a gang comprised of characters that were his most loyal cultists from og canon )

It culminates to an insane showdown/shoot out in another settlement where Suguru happens to sees a kid stumble into the mess. Despite his lack of empathy and convoluted and unresolved emotions he can't find it in himself to abandon a child, so he scoops up the kid and tosses them to one of his gang mates

uhhh satoru is there it's a mess and something something, when it ends the child's mother is shouting the kids name, and Suguru pauses his escape because he recognizes that voice that's haunted him in his sleep for years and he turns around, there she is, his beloved. Alive and well. The child wiggles away from his men and runs to her, shouting mom.

Suguru didn't really look at the kid before but he does now. That black hair and purple eyes. Just like him. And his beloved looks up at him, ready to thank him for saving her child when she realizes it's him.

And all those emotions he thought he locked away comes undone and Suguru is just a fucking mess. They're here. They're alive. Somehow, they escaped their kidnappers and they've survived.

something something

idk the overarching mess of that one gang is resolved once Satoru and Suguru team up one last time to take the leader down and Satoru once again turns away and lies to Yaga that Suguru died in the shoot out. Suguru, their lover and child begin a new life together far away from it all on a ranch of their own.

okay I literally want to write this so bad and I love it so much — I’ve been racking my head for a western story and this is so good!!!

if you don’t mind, I would love to write this 🥹🥹🥹

[anxiousotters]

I don't even go here but I simply must know about PaxAxe child of divorce au?

AHHHHHH PAZAXE MY BELOVED THANK YOU FOR THE ASK <3<3<3 (I’m so normal about them I swear)

In this AU, Paz and Axe (who were never married in the first place) have split custody of Ragnar due to some convoluted mandalorian adoption laws after Paz was falsely declared dead, and now they’re learning how to co-parent

“Come on,” Paz says gruffly. He turns and heads up the stairs without so much as a backwards glance. Axe rolls his eyes, but follows him up to the roof. “Sit.” The man orders. Axe shoots him an irritated look, but does so, folding himself down onto the smooth sandstone ledge and letting his legs dangle over the side. Their pauldrons clink together as Paz settles into the space beside him. For a moment, neither of them say anything as they watch the sun set over the ridge. “Do you want to talk about it?” “No thanks.” “Suit yourself,” Paz shrugs. Out of the corner of his eye, Axe sees him pull a flask from his belt. Paz turns away slightly, tipping the lip of his helmet up and— Axe quickly averts his gaze. He didn’t see anything, but the casual air of the gesture— and the subsequent trust it implies— makes his heart skip a beat. “Here,” Paz says, nudging the flask into Axe’s hands and breaking him out of his thoughts. “Drink.” “Has anyone ever told you that you’re quite pushy?” Axe grumbles as he takes a pull, even though he uses it to hide his quietly pleased smile. The tihaar burns on the way down. He’s not sure if he’s imagining the lingering warmth of Paz’s lips on the bottle.

[cryptidclaw]

Do you have any tips for writing/making allegiances?

Im not sure if you mean writing accurate/full allegiances for the warriors canon/aus or in you mean just generally?

General advice: keep descriptions simple or as simple as they can be, I found this very difficult at first since I had my own designs for them and I wanted to include all the details, but that makes descriptions convoluted and hard to understand! I still feel like my descriptions could be better but they are certainly more understandable than before!

also if you can get someone to read over your allegiances to check for type-os / mistakes... i dont do this and there is ALWAYS a problem that I missed LOL

....

for warriors/warriors aus? I can go over my very tedious process...

what i do is go thru all the alligiances on the wiki in which cats mentioned could/ would be a part of my alligiance's time period.

so for example: with the first arc, I looked through future allegiances of books into the 3rd arc and took note of the cats mentioned in those allegiances, especially cats who have not been mentioned before, I also take note of which book's allegiance they first appear in to guess at when they could have been born. I also looked at allegiances for books before the first arc, like Yellowfang's secret, there I found cats that would also be warriors in the first arc allegiances!

I also will open each cat's wiki and see their noted relatives bec sometimes those cats are seemingly never noted in the allegiances but they exist somewhere?? and they should be there! often kits or parents!

I then think about which cats I want to still be alive, how big do I want the clan to be? which side characters could have died at this point, or could have been born later?

also! for clans where there are very little cats mentioned to be in them, (cough Windclan cough) i may also add my own little side characters to fill in some spaces or I may let some kits survive who are never mentioned again after a certain book/ are assumed dead!

oh ya... and having a family tree really helps, Family echo my beloved

anyways... ya.... this is why the arc 2 allegiances aren't out yet.

[asciidot]

who is this magnificent specimen??

I physically reacted to someone asking me about him but thats the subject of my special interest of four years. That is Laz. Lazureus.

Lazureus is the player character of Just shapes and Beats

Laz is the small blue square here. But as a Special Interest of Five Years my jsab au spiralled greatly out of control and into its own universe with spinoff oc casts and like five parallel main storylines in which became a convoluted yet beloved mess. Lazureus is one of the central characters! I am absolutely more than willing to never shut up about him if you have any more specific questions >:]. I also started and put on pause a little ask blog @soundscape-sandbox which has Some Laz Content if youre interested which i realised was not all that sustainable as i swap art styles on an hourly basis and also Suck at ordering questions. And also started it during exam season iirc

also this is him. From 2020. Vs him 2023. I should draw him properly again just to see how its changed. He is thankful for being pried from being the sole subject of my attention

[ad-hawkeye]

posing you a potentially difficult task:rate artem’s year three worst to best(when you get the time ofc)

anon this was difficult on my soul. but i did it. mostly. because there's one or two i haven't watched in full myself, and one of those i legit have heard nothing about in terms of quality, i will mark them with a star.

i will also be including some of the upcoming third year cards i've read the translations of.

with that disclaimer out of the way, here's my list! worst from best.

ocean’s enchantment [summer splash] - i have no clue how they made a card that i consider worse than artem's second anniversary card but. by god did they do it. never say anything is impossible. at least artem was dressed nice in his second anniversary card. and also shitfaced. literally nothing is in this card's favor. also artem knowing how to surf is mind numbingly stupid i'll say it. lavish invitation [second anniversary] - i've bitched and moaned about this card for nearly two years now. you all know the takes on this one. third anniversary - this one nearly put me to sleep! 2/10. despite some weird short lived ooc moments, not as bad as artem's second anniversary card. its main sin is being a chore to get through. i was fighting against the urge to skip forward. mediocre art. top up cello ssr - ugh. i got so annoyed by this one i stopped watching a few minutes before the end. it's yet another "omg no way artem is a master at this random ass hobby?!?!?!?!??" card that year three LOVES and the explanation for it is so convoluted. really pretty art though. always happy to see rosa's canonical violin skills mentioned. calm as the night [billiards] - this one was fine. i guess? first of the cards i don't actively dislike. epic highs (omg this part made me smile like a year one/two card!) and epic lows (why are they licking each other's arms) velocity of desire [racing]* - i'd rank this one equal to artem's billiards card. one of the ssrs i mentioned that i haven't actually read, but i've seen people have generally indifferent to positive commentary on. better handling of jealousy. the actual event this came with was super cute though. love for the ages [3rd birthday] - cute art, serviceable if not a teensy bit convoluted story. an enjoyable time. this ranking is NOT about the birthday event it came with which, imo, sucked major ass. enshrouded sunglow - to the surprise of no one the au cards are going to wind up topping this list. funny enough i think this is artem's weakest au card. it's afraid to take risks and was a bit more boring than the other aus. still ages better than most of year three though. cutie ollie - mind boggling how this card where artem "isn't used to this kind of physical touch" in regards to mc playing with his hair, comes AFTER the daddy dom sex god ssr. anyways this one is very cute. i'm convinced it was supposed to be a year two card bc the only mention of second anniversary is a quick mention of an engagement ring. lmao. stormy enigma [bakerlon] - bakerlon my beloved. save me bakerlon save me. one of artem's better au cards, but i still wouldn't rank it first. also celestine is in it! a win! belle nuit d'amour - further evidence to my claim that tot's personal story cards rarely if ever suck. some good character stuff, the closest we've seen to artem fucking up a case, really good art. would recommend. or maybe not idk i haven't actually read the global version but i can't imagine it's too different from the fan translation i read. dragonsbreath - this one ties with the weeds for my favorite artem au card story. neil is in this one. fun plot. good art. good characterization.

[UNRANKED] voice of comfort* - i have not read this one nor have i ever seen anyone talk about it like. ever. or maybe i did read it and just fucking forgot. idk. don't really have the energy to read it regardless. the art is kinda mid. if anyone wants to message me their thoughts on this one, i can tentatively adjust my ranking on it

*i have not personally read either of these. any ratings are done via word of mouth or summary. regard these ratings tentatively.

[theimaginatrix27]

I've been in the Star Trek fandom spaces long enough, time to talk publicly about a thing that I am injecting into every fic where it is relevant

So if you've been paying attention to my blog the last couple months, you will know I am a huge fan of @enbygesserit 's work. They write the absolute best Dominion lore and fic I have ever had the pleasure of reading/encountering, and I eat up each new piece like my favourite confectionery.

What I am about to discuss predates any exposure I had to their work by at least thirteen years.

And the ship it surrounds was my DS9 OTP for two entire decades (before I discovered the O'Brien polycule and now my DS9 otp is a "One True Polyamorous tangle", but moving on).

That ship being Kiraodo. My heart broke when Odo confessed his love to an apparently dying Kira, she said she loved him back, and that was the clue for him to realise she was not Kira at all. And then when the Female Changeling Voice of the Link told him Kira would never love him because he was a Changeling, I was a tiny sad twelve-yo who thought, "But I love him!" And then I wanted it to be a thing.

And when I found out it was a thing in canon but they had to part ways at the end of the series, I was happy and sad at the same time.

I was a teenager, I didn't know the relationship felt awkward to some (though to be fair I still hated Children of Time and what the alternate/Gaia Odo did, but I address that in another fic so it's fine). I just wanted the sad Changeling and the fiery Bajoran to prove the mean Changeling wrong.

But also, I acknowledged to myself, even in 2009-10, that it would not be fair to Odo at all to make him leave his people again so quickly. I felt sympathetic toward the Changelings/Founders even as a teenager who had not and would not see DS9 in its entirety (curse you, cable TV! You with your reruns and exorbitant prices making it so hard for us to keep you for more than a few months at a time!) Anyways, I knew even then that I didn't want to take Odo away from his people again, even for him and Kira to be together.

So what was my solution?

Here were the canon points I considered at age nineteen (I was creating the bare bones of the Galactic Warp AU at the time and also had a strict must-adhere-to-canon policy for any fanfic ideas I'd had at the time):

The Great Link turned Odo into a solid.

The baby Changeling in The Begotten turned him back, at the cost of its life (but maybe not if it hadn't already been dying).

Therefore, it is canonically possible for a solid to become a Changeling.

What if Kira had been Changelinged?

WHY IS THAT NOT CANON?

I have this as a significant plot point in any Kiraodo content I'm going to write, so if you see Kiraodo becoming a thing in any fic, expect to see Changeling Kira show up somewhere.

"But wait!" someone yells. "You just said you didn't want to take Odo from his people, and Kira's Bajoranness is a huge part of her identity! And you're gonna just take that away from her?"

No, actually. You think the Prophets give a shit whether or not Kira's corporeal form is solid? Fuck no, they're not corporeal and time is not linear for them! The Kira is always the Kira. The Kira is always of Bajor. The Kira is always beloved of the Prophets.

This holds true in every single fic in which I have inserted this. Kira doesn't always become a Changeling full time (some of my AUs have magic), but more importantly, She never stops being Bajoran in the ways that really matter.

Which, if this had been a canon episode, would have been emphasised by the Prophets themselves and I am not taking critique on this.

"But the Founders would never do this in canon!" I hear you cry. "They hate solids and the Voice doesn't like Kira especially!"

First of all, the convoluted love triangle between Odo, Kira and the Voice was stupid.

Second of all, it doesn't even have to be them who do it, we got other more powerful entities around! Q was basically banned from DS9, sure, but what if Kira and Odo weren't on DS9?

Here's my idea for how this could have happened in canon, if the writers had really wanted to sell us the ship.

Odo and Kira have been away on a mission together (doesn't matter where, they just have to be off the station). It's sometime in Season 6, post the Dominion occupation of DS9. When the runabout returns, Odo coms the station and says he needs to give them warning about something, and they're going to have to take him at his word, however hard that may be.

"What's wrong?" Sisko asks. "And where's Major Kira?"

In response, Odo holds up his bucket. There is a Changeling in goo form inside.

"There was an—incident while we were returning from our mission. It was successful, by the way."

Sisko stares at the screen intently for a moment.

"Are you saying," he asks slowly, "that Major Kira was replaced by a Changeling?"

"No, Captain," Odo responds. "I am saying this Changeling is Major Kira."

Cue opening theme!

And possibly this would be a two-parter! I feel that with the whole theme of DS9 being nuance, and with the Dominion being such a big deal, it deserves to be!

Basically the plot would first involve a flashback to Q popping in while Kira and Odo are arguing about something Changeling-related or whatever, going "You know, I've been watching you and yours for a while now—from a safe distance of course—and frankly, I've been surprised by the lack of nuance with regard to the Founders."

And Kira's all, "Oh come on, don't you start with this high-and-mighty attitude! I read all the records about you after your last visit to Deep Space 9, you don't have any room to talk!"

"And neither do you," Q fires back. "You think your terrible acts were justified, don't you? Oh, you know they were dreadful, the fact that you could be so violent distressed you so! But when it comes down to it, you can sleep at night, because you helped drive out the Cardassians and set Bajor free. But when the Dominion imposes their order on their part of the galaxy because they used to be oppressed and were traumatised, you sit there on what moral high ground you have and pass judgment on them!"

"I don't need to hear this! Especially not from you! Sisko made you stay away from the station—from us! Now get off this runabout and leave us alone."

"Oh, you do need to hear it, Nerys. But if you insist on me leaving, let me do so on my terms. Don't worry, my little firework, I'll make sure you don't need my help undoing this." And he snaps his fingers and disappears.

And Kira's form begins to melt and she barely has time to call Odo's name before she dissolves into Changeling goo.

Back on DS9, everyone's a bit frantic after seeing the runabout footage, which confirms Odo's story. He links with her and is able to help her reform after a little time, during which we get to hear panicked Kira thoughts and some cool visuals of what the link is like for her. We get a scene after she's able to shift back into herself where Jadzia quips that she's got purple hair and Cardassian neck ridges or something, which is not amusing to her at all.

Then there's a whole discussion on how they're going to fix her before the rest of the Federation finds out, because "Are they going to believe the testimony of one rogue Changeling and the footage from a runabout computer? What if they decide Kira's a threat and take her into custody?"

And the answer is pretty obvious, especially after Julian examines a sample of her matrix and discovers traces of her dna are still in it.

They have to take her to the Great Link so she can be restored to solidity. The Founders are rather good at genetic manipulation, after all. It'll be fine!

Except they're at war, and the Voice does not like Kira, which forms the majority of the conflict, as they have to convince any Dominion forces they meet that "Seriously, we are not here to fight, please don't blow us up, we just want to help our friend, yes we mean it, don't fire!"

And in the end Kira has to pretend to be a Founder just to get the various ships to leave them alone, and it's weird as fuck for her but she makes it to the Great Link and the Voice is there and doesn't believe her at first until they link and she gets proof from her memories.

Which leads to Kira finding out about the morphogenic virus early, and being incensed, because "Look, I don't like you, but that's crossing multiple lines! I'd never have signed off on that if it were up to me, and I know Sisko wouldn't either! Doctor Bashir's brilliant—he can help you, I'm sure of it."

"Even if we did not help you right away?"

"I can wait, if I have to. I'm kind of getting used to this whole thing. It's been—an interesting experience."

And after another link to confirm that yes, she means that and it's not even in a bad way, the Voice consents to help her regain her solid status and she goes into the Great Link, gets a small taste of the Founders' collective trauma and is deeply moved by it, bursting into tears when she emerges, once more humanoid. There's a whole final scene about how she wishes more people in the Federation could have experienced what she did, and then she goes to write a log entry on the whole thing or something.

But this would absolutely change the trajectory of the war because that's how DS9 works, so it wouldn't just be handwaved away. in subsequent episodes, Julian is able to find a cure—possibly with help from within the Dominion itself because the Founders would very much like to not die and Julian is being Julian at them and they're taking a real liking to him.

And the galaxy is saved because Q did a thing! But also Kira understands Odo better after this and their relationship is all the richer for it.

*Starts chanting* It should've been canon, it should've been canon, it should've been canon, IT SHOULD'VE BEEN CANON!

[presidentdisastraofgallifrey]

Judging Doctor Who: Eleventh Doctor

Disclaimer: This is all in good fun and I don't take fandom serious

Good episodes I like

The Eleventh Hour - I hate the time cracks arc, but if you just focus on the plot itself the escaped shapeshifter prisoner thing is fun

The Beast Below - It's so sad!! And Liz 10 is hot and badass and a good person but not, which is my favorite type of lady

Victory of the Daleks - A delightfully classic dalek plot

Amy's Choice - Basically another au-type episode and it's fun. And also reveals the Doctor's deep self hatred!

Vincent and the Doctor - Yes everyone likes this one. But it is impressive. It manages to be both heartbreaking and have scenes of him fighting an invisible creature!

The Lodger - fun and silly, a nice breather

A Christmas Carol - very clever and sweet, wonderful use of time travel. And there's flying fish that like singing!

The Curse of the Black Spot - A nice monster of the week with no real monster! And historical pirates became space pirates!

The Rebel Flesh/The Almost People - yes I hate this arc too, but the self-contained plot here is actually a fun who gets to be a person one

The Girl Who Waited - I think this is the only episode where Amy has enough character for be to like her. Plus it's another (horrifying) what if story!

The God Complex - Creepy and fun. I loved seeing all the fears, and the mystery was interesting

Closing Time - A fun and silly enough adventure that I don't mind the cybermen

The Doctor, the Widow, and the Wardrobe - Sweet and magical, and I liked that the adult got to go on the Narnia adventure

Asylum of the Daleks - Good dalek episode, good (first?) use of the dead humanoid dalek slaves, excellent heartbreaking reveal that their new friend is no longer human, and I love the daleks all just forgetting him

The Snowmen - Very nice creepy but silly monsters, and at this point the Clara mystery was intriguing

Rings of Akhaten - SO all around beautiful, and I also love the inclusion of a rare multi-alien gathering. There should be more of those

The Crimson Horror - Vastra my beloved! And also this was an interesting mystery, and the Doctor isn't even in most of it, but I just love too many aspects to name! It's very good!

The Day of the Doctor - Do I necessarily love this answer to the Time War? No. Do I understand it? Yes, because at this point they were stuck with it and this gives them an opening for Gallifrey to still exist (they squandered it but that's beside the point). Besides, the episode itself is great fun (the Doctor never gets along with himself!)

Bad episodes I like

The Time of Angels/Flesh and Stone - Yeah further lore made the angels less interesting, and the story didn't make sense. But I enjoyed it! And River is there!

Night Terrors - THIS story would have been perfect if they hadn't made the logic circular (all this is happening because the kid is scared he'll get sent away, but they only discussed that because of these problems). But it's still fun

Hide - I'm sorry, the Doctor does not consult random ghost hunting psychics. However. The answer of a time traveler moving wrong through time was great fun

Good episodes I don't like

The Vampires of Venice - pretty typically goofy, but I didn't enjoy it that much. Maybe because of Amy and Rory

The Hungry Earth/Cold Blood - Again, it's fine but I was kind of bored. And wish if they were going to bring back Silurians they'd let them stay

The Doctor's Wife - well written and all, but I found it uninteresting

A Town Called Mercy - Absolutely nothing wrong with it, but I don't have much interest in the wild west

The Bells of Saint John - It was fine, and as a monster of the week actually fun, but I didn't love it as Clara's intro

Cold War - This falls under the genre of running around a small trapped ship that I just don't like

Bad episodes I don't like

The Pandorica Opens/The Big Bang - What the hell was this?? Everything about it was convoluted, poorly executed, and uninteresting

The Impossible Astronaut/The Day of the Moon - I actually like the Silence, but the plot itself is just so convoluted and bad

A Good Man Goes to War - No. Just no to everything about this.

Let's Kill Hitler - The robot ship thing is fun and there's like one funny joke, but the rest of it is so terrible

The Wedding of River Song - All of time happening at once is kind of fun, but not enough to make up for (1) the ridiculous to begin with plot, (2) the way they absolutely cheat in a way that should not work, and (3) the implication that they never REALLY got married

Dinosaurs on a Spaceship - Just feels like a bunch of different things randomly thrown together

Journey to the Center of the TARDIS - A little too nonsensical for me

Nightmare in Silver - Both too busy and also boring

The Name of the Doctor - A disappointing answer to an actually compelling mystery

The Time of the Doctor - Disappointing use of Gallifrey, and really no reason he should be able to physically age

[linka-from-captain-planet]

The L Word: Faerûn, Part 2: Tav Lore (aka why Counsellor Florrick is the actual main character)

Part 1 here.

The Thong Straps that Launched a Million Headcanons

To make TLW:F even vaguely comprehensible to anyone but me, there is something important yet convoluted to explain:

The protagonist is a Tav, but the most important character in the entire story is Counsellor Florrick.

I'm not an OC gal. Creating a brand new character is not my wheelhouse; my type of creativity is interpreting or expanding on things that already exist in canon, not really adding new things to it. So the way I went about developing an OC for this story was to start with the character that I really wanted to highlight---my beloved Florrick, the sexiest creature in this entire game (FACT not opinion)--- and build the OC around her, working more or less within the confines of canon because that's how I operate generally.

Why? Because I'm a crazy person I guess and I wanted it to seem semi-reasonable for Florrick to get her ass ate at Waukeen's Rest. Being a fan of drama, multishipping, and elaborate headcanons about background characters, the concept spiralled from there and eventually morphed into TLW:F.

So, yes, like 70% of the entire reason this thing exists is because Florrick is hot. The other 30% is the aforementioned story gripes from Part 1.

Florrick isn't the protagonist because I need her to fulfill her usual roles as a supporting character in the overall story, but she IS the most important character because she and her relationship with the protagonist drives much of the plot (and also fills in the semi-pot holes of "why the fuck would a drow agree to do any of the Baldur's Gate-centric side quests", since obvi the Tav had to be drow because they're the coolest duh).

Tav Lore: Alekto T'Elvord, and her relationship with Florrick

Note: lore mistakes are just part of the AU

Imagine Bette Porter from the L Word (snobbish, selfish, completely insane under a veneer of success) combined with Gaston from Beauty and the Beast (vain, obnoxious, but a legitimate talented hunter and tracker), add on some subjugation trauma on top (to match the other origins), some hidden depths (to match the other origins), and that's Alekto.

Born at the tail end of her clan's several hundred years of indentured servitude to House Xorlarrin, Alekto spent the first fifty years of her life underneath the boot of the Matron. Trained as a fletcher/bowyer (ranger with artisan background), her skill in crafting and using fine drow archery raised her individual clout in the status-obsessed drow society. Once her clan reached the end of servitude, most of them were simply slain rather than set free, but Alekto was spared due to her relatively high esteem and talents as an artisan and huntress. Although technically a free woman thereafter, Alekto to the present day feels bound to the Matron's beck and call, fearing what would happen if she defied her. Despite actively avoiding drow society by spending as much time as possible hunting (poaching, for trophies and alchemical ingredients to sell) in the wilds of the underdark and, eventually, the surface, Alekto recognizes that social climbing is her only real route to freedom, and so ostensibly, her individual goal in life is to win herself a high-status spouse, preferably one ranked even higher than Xorlarrin.

But really, what Alekto truly yearns for is security and reassurance, and a partner who makes her feel safe. Although it's been decades, her first love, Neerstra, another drow peasant, was sacrificed to Lolth and although Alekto tries to rationalize this event was normal-thus-fine and even honorable/romantic, she privately is very disillusioned by and resentful of the senselessly brutal and bleak drow culture.

Shortly after being granted "freedom", Alekto traveled to the surface in pursuit of a unicorn, but was captured by a village of wood elves defending the forest. Among them happened to be the future-counsellor Florrick, visiting home to share news of her promotion to the office of an up-and-coming duke. Recognizing a fellow black sheep (a city-dwelling, wizard wood elf?) and someone whose urbane sense of justice could be exploited, Alekto sought to manipulate Florrick into saving her, which worked!

But also, Alekto was sincerely drawn to the steadfast, virtuous Florrick, and although Florrick was not initially impressed by a drow poacher, the two bonded over several days of forced proximity and a long, tumultuous relationship was born.

For about the next twenty years, Florrick and Alekto were often on-and-off, and further often separated as Alekto traveled between Menzo and Baldur's Gate. They were a poor match, compatible emotionally and sexually but not socially, morally, or in lifestyle; but both were stubborn enough to stick it out way too long. Over the course of these decades, Alekto became (by drow standards) familiar with surface culture and the fixtures of Baldur's Gate, such as Ravengard and his young son, Wyll (although Alekto avoided having to meet them), as well as 'personal' associates of Florrick such as Naoise Nallinto (a member of the wood elf polycule I can only assume Florrick has) and Nine-Fingers Keene (a political rival and sometimes-lover of Florrick's).

In around 1482, ten years pre-canon, Alekto and Florrick called it quits 'officially', but find it hard to stay apart, officially. Alekto especially feels attached to Florrick, and in times of duress, finds herself 'relapsing' and returning to Baldur's Gate to check up on (stalk) Florrick, allegedly in hopes of reconciling, but really, it's more of a desire for the stability that Florrick represents than a desire for Florrick, herself.

So, in Eleasis 1492, after Minthara Baenre is drawn away from Lolth in favor of the hot new cult on the block, the Matrons of Menzoberranzan put together the growing cult and increasing rumors of illithid activity and come to a conclusion: Araj Oblodra must be involved, and may be ascending from a worthless crackpot to an actual threat. Thus, Xorlarrin sends Alekto to track Araj down in her last known location: Baldur's Gate.

Powerless to refuse, Alekto travels to the city and raids Crimson Draughts, and in doing so uncovers the indisputable evidence that Araj has joined the Cult of the Absolute and is actively mobilizing plans to reinstate her House, and/or destroy Menzoberranzan.

Nervous about the ramifications of all this, Alekto dallies in the city, hoping to find comfort in Florrick's stalwart arms. However, after connecting with Naoise, she learns that Florrick is several days late returning from Elturel with Ravengard, which worries her further.

But, before she can investigate further, she's snatched off the streets by the nautiloid.

Next part: The Pre-Canon Chart