#convinced myself it was a dream and not real because the idea of seeing that on television was too freaky for me

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

sometimes i think about how adventure time episode the creeps (the one where they go to a masquerade party and everyone gets murdered) taught me how to suppress memories

[forever-rogue]

Hi! Could we get a Eddie fic where it’s like a timeline throughout their relationship? How they first met, first date, engagement etc? Maybe even the first fight for some angst 👀😂

AN | Please! This idea is so sweet, but also I couldn’t help myself so this is singledad!eddie as well 🥰

Warnings | Language

Pairing | Eddie x Fem!Reader

Word Count | 5.4k

Masterlist | Main, Eddie 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The first time Eddie Munson met you…he didn't exactly like you. You just weren't his type in any sense of the word - not his type of friend, his type of girl, or his type of associate. He never would have thought that the two of you would have any sort of relationship. It would actually have been laughable to him, if someone had told him you’d be anything more than a bi-yearly presence in his life. 

But here you were, the sweet, kind dental assistant that greeted him and his son as they walked into the new dental practice. As soon as Eddie had completed the new patient paperwork and was checked in, you walked up front and called out his son’s name. 

The first thing Eddie had noticed was how pretty you were - he could own up to that but the second thing he noticed was how kind and gentle you were with his little boy. Jamie Munson was a small, shy little boy who had been terrified at the idea of going to the dentist. But you had some sort of magical power because the boy relaxed and came willingly with you, Eddie in tow. He had to hand it to you; you had a way with Jamie…and with him. 

When it turned out that Jamie was having a bit of an issue with some of his permanent teeth that were coming in, he quickly realized that he was going to be seeing more of you. For some odd, unexplainable reason, thrilled and terrified him. There was something so magnetic about you that it made his stomach flutter with butterflies. It didn’t help that Jamie had practically fallen in love with you and thoroughly enjoyed telling anyone and everyone about the nice lady at the dentist.

To top it all off, Eddie found himself drawn to you as well, finding any and every excuse to talk to you whenever he was in the office. And to his surprise - and yours - he asked you out. It was fumbled and awkward and sweet, all Eddie and priceless. When you’d said yes without hesitation, Eddie had been shocked. When you told him that you had thought about asking him out as well, he was sure he was dreaming.

When you showed up to what turned out to be the first date of many, he was convinced he was living in a sweet, lavender haze.

But it was real, and you were real, and before either of you knew it - it had all become a vivid, beautiful reality. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Your stomach was in knots as you waited for Eddie to pick you up for your date. Your first date. You never would have thought the metalhead would have one, felt the same as you did and two, actually ask you out. You were almost polar opposites, but you’d developed your attraction to him rather quickly. So quickly that it was almost scary. When he’d shyly asked you out, fumbling over his words and stammering nervously, as he got ready to leave with Jamie, you’d said yes almost instantly. 

And…now you were anxiously waiting for him. You looked yourself over in the full length mirror, wondering if you were dressed too formally and or too casually. Your dress was light and pretty, perfect for the summer and you slipped on your shoes before you could talk yourself into changing. Before you could worry too much you heard a loud knock at the door. 

“Ugh,” you groaned at your reflection before deciding you looked fine enough and quickly padding to the door. You threw it open without even making sure that it really was Eddie and found yourself breathless as you looked up at him. There was a big, nervous smile on his face and a pretty bouquet of wildflowers in his hand, “Eddie.”

“That’s me,” he chuckled nervously as you slowly stopped yourself from freaking out, “these are for you, sweetheart.”

“They’re beautiful,” you gently took them and clutched them to your chest, “thank you so much.”

“O-of course,” he followed you inside as you walked to the kitchen to put the flowers in a vase. He looked around, trying to get a feel for you who were outside of the scrubs and office, “you look really pretty.”

“Thank you,” your cheeks - your entire face - warmed up under his attention and concentrated your efforts on arranging your flowers, “you clean up nicely yourself, handsome.”

“Figured I had to try if I wanted to stand a chance of looking remotely like I should be taking you out,” you snorted in amusement at his silly antics. There was something about that was relaxing and made you feel like you’d already known him for so long. This was definitely something you could get used to, “but I’m glad I hit the mark.”

“More than,” you promised sweetly, “flowers and handsome? It’s coming up cherries already. Where are we headed tonight?”

“That’s a surprise!” he grinned eagerly, “if that’s okay with you.”

“It’s perfect, Eddie. Really,” your reassurance made him already feel like he had an actual chance with you, “let’s go!”

Eddie had been debating on what to do for your first date since he'd asked last week. He wasn't sure what angle he should take - fancy and formal or casual and fun - eventually he settled on just being himself. Being the fun, dorky Eddie that he was. Which turned out to be the best thing possible.

"No way!" Your eyes lit up when he pulled up to the arcade, and you saw all that it had to offer. He'd been watching your face the entire time, trying to gauge your reaction. He hoped you didn't think it was too much of a single dad move, like it was the only thing he could think of, "I am totally kicking your ass at mini-golf!"

That brought a smile to his face, "you wish, princess. I happen to be a mini-golfing pro - I can beat a five-year-old and I'll beat you too!"

"You're so on," you almost jumped out of the car, motioning for him to hurry up, "and you're going down at air hockey too!"

"You're just a dork too," he reached for your hand without having to think about it, worrying for a moment that he was being too bold, but realized when you laced your fingers with his, "I was thinking after this we could go to that new diner for dinner. I-if that sounds okay, of course."

"It's perfect," you couldn't stop yourself from kissing his cheek excitedly, "I couldn't think of anything better!"

And Eddie was positive he fell in love with you then and there.

When he dropped you off later that night, he could barely manage to keep it together. He hadn’t planned on kissing you, not because he didn’t want to because he really did, but because he had been so nervous. He didn’t want to fuck anything up; but then you went and kissed him of your own initiative and he almost melted into a puddle on your doorstep. 

“I had a good time tonight,” you touched his cheek before kissing him one last time, “I…I’d love to do this again, if you’d like.”

“I’ve love to,” his cheeks pinked as he nodded eagerly, “d-definitely.”

“Cool,” you bit the inside of your cheek, butterflies fluttering all around your stomach, “call me?”

“Of course,” he promised softy, “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, sweetheart. Have a good night.”

“You too, Eddie,” you whispered, watching as he reluctantly stepped off your porch and towards his van, “good night.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You’d been with Eddie for just over two years now. It was hard to believe it had been that long already but at the same time it felt like it had been forever. The two of you had fallen into each other’s lives so seamlessly. One of the best parts was that the two of you almost never fought. But, like with everything in life, something had to give. 

Eventually you were going to have your first fight. It was inevitable…right? Right.

“Hey sweetheart,” Eddie came home to find you in the kitchen, singing along to whatever record you’d thrown on the vintage player. The kitchen smelled delicious, clear evidence that you’d been baking which also made his stomach grumble, “something smells good.”

“Hey my love,” you grinned as you walked over to him, putting your hands on his shoulders as you leaned up to kiss him, “missed you today.”

“Missed you too,” he stole a few more kisses before eagerly eyeing the pie you had cooling on the counter, “it smells amazing.”

“Nuh uh,” you teased, “these are for the bake sale at Jamie’s school tomorrow. I’ll make us something later, promise.”

“Fine,” he sighed dramatically as you snorted in amusement, “where is the kiddo, anyway?”

“With the Carlstroms,” you turned back to mixing the brownie batter as Eddie raised an eyebrow, “they were going to the theme park and asked if he could go along so I said yes. He really likes Eric so I figured they’d have fun and I’d be able to get all this baking done. They’ll be back tonight.”

“You just let him go?” Edide asked and you could tell from the tone in his voice that something was off, “without even bothering to ask me?”

“Ummm…yeah?” you answered softly, giving him a sheepish shrug, “you were at work, and Jamie’s over at their house a lot so I figured it was okay. We know them, and I didn’t want to bother you with it.”

“He’s my son,” he said quietly and your entire face fell as you realized what he was saying. You're not his mother, “you can’t just go and make decisions without me.”

“I-I’m sorry,” you stammered nervously, feeling tears already well up in your eyes, “I-I didn’t mean to sidestep you or anything, I really didn’t think it was a big deal. I’m sorry, I should have asked you before just saying yes.”

“Didn’t think it was a big deal?” he scoffed, “what if something happened and I had no clue where he was? He’s just a kid!”

“Eddie-”

“Don’t,” he shook his head and started to back out of the kitchen, “I’m going to go outside and cool off.”

You watched him go without a word, tears running down your cheeks. You hastily wiped them away with the sleeve of your sweater, trying to hide your sniffle. If you thought, even remotely, that this would have been a big deal, you would have asked Eddie first. It hadn’t seemed like a big deal at all; you loved and adored Jamie as though he was your own son and you’d never do anything to put him even in the smallest bit of danger. You hoped that Eddie would understand that at some point. You loved both of them with your entire heart. 

Eddie came back home a hours later, and while you had been worried, you knew that more than likely he had gone to Wayne’s place. That man could talk sense into him and if nothing else, he often served as a neutral third party.

By the time he got back, Jamie was already home, worn out from playing and being in the warm sun, inadvertently napping on the couch. Eddie relaxed when he saw the small boy, affectionately ruffling his hair before finding you. 

“Hey,” he rapped his knuckles gently against the wall as he found you still baking. You turned to him with a nervous expression, a hesitant smile on your face.

“Hi,” you whispered as you stopped what you were doing and set the tray of cookies down, “listen, Eddie-”

“Hang on,” he gently interrupted you, stepping closer and reached out to gently touch your cheek, “before you say anything else, I want to apologize. I shouldn’t have talked to you the way I did or said what I did. I’m sorry…I hope you can forgive me.”

You softened from his words, leaning into his touch as he brushed his knuckles along your cheek, “I do…of course I do. But I am sorry for not checking in with you. You’re right too, you’re his dad and it wasn’t my place to make that decision.”

“No,” he shook his head, “I shouldn’t have said that either. Not how I did - I am his dad but you’re his mom. And it is your place to make decisions like that. I guess sometimes I still have a little bit of a hard time remembering that I’m not a single dad anymore, especially when I’ve got someone so brilliant and amazing and wonderful by my side.”

“Eddie-”

“I mean it,” he promised and you knew that he was speaking from the heart, “all of it. I love you, baby.”

“I love you too,” you couldn’t stop yourself from throwing your arms around him and hugging onto him like a koala, “so much. You and Jamie.”

“I know it and so does he,” Eddie sighed softly and pressed a kissed to the side of your head, “thank you.”

“For what?”

“For taking me back,” he chuckled nervously, “not kicking me right to the curb.”

“One little disagreement isn’t going to break us apart,” you insisted gently, “things like this are normal and they’re going to pop up every now and then. But we love each other and we’re a family, so we’re always going to work it out.”

“Of course,” the part of him that worried you would just leave when things got hard was always going to be there, even if just a little bit. But he knew, more than anything, that you were never going anywhere. You were it, you were his forever.

“Daddy? Mama?” Jamie padded into the kitchen and his sweet little voice made you melt. He started calling you that out of his own volition, and it had made you happier than anything. Eddie had panicked and wanted to make sure it was okay, but when you reassured him that it was more than okay, you both knew that this was it. You were a family, “can I have a cookie?”

You exchanged a look with Eddie and you both playfully rolled your eyes. You grabbed one of the peanut butter chocolate chip cookies and broke it in half, handing a piece to both of your boys, “there we are. Good?”

“Mhmm,” Jamie nodded through a mouthful of cookie, crumbs already on his face. The sight was too adorable.

“Perfect,” Eddie whispered as he looked into your eyes, “absolutely perfect.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You’d noticed that Eddie had been acting nervous all day. You wondered if something was wrong, with either him or Jamie, but didn’t say anything. The young boy had seemed fine when Eddie left to drop him off at school in the morning. But Eddie seemed jumpy and off all morning. You’d caught him off guard more than a few times and he looked like he’d committed some sort of crime. When you’d asked him what was wrong, he’d insisted that nothing was wrong but you could tell that he was lying; you knew him well enough by now. Your two-year anniversary was coming up soon and you basically knew him like a book. Which also meant that you knew he would come forward and tell you what was going on eventually. 

But when you got home…things were still off. 

As soon as you walked through the front door you let out a long sigh as you kicked off your shoes and set your purse down. It had been such a long day involving screaming and sick children, irate parents, and malfunctioning tools. All you had been dreaming of doing was coming home and relaxing with your two loves. 

“Eddie?” you softly called out his name as you walked into the kitchen; something smelled delicious already and was practically making your mouth water. You found him standing at the counter, intently cutting up some vegetables. You leaned against the counter and looked at him with starry eyes, as he met your eyes and offered you a small smile in return, “hey handsome.”

“Hey baby,” you could see his shoulders relaxing as he turned to you and leaned in to kiss you. You leaned into his touch, and let him kiss you softly, practically melting into him. When he pulled back, you tenderly took his face in your hands and pressed a few more kisses to his lips. By the time you pulled back he was grinning at you with a pretty pink flush to his cheeks, “missed you today.”

“I missed you too,” you sighed dramatically, causing him to laugh fondly at your silly antics, “lemme take a shower and then I’ll be back to whine all about it.”

“It’s not whining,” he insisted as he often did, “and you know I’ll listen to you talk about anything and everything.”

“You’re a good man,” you bit the inside of your cheek, “hey, where’s Jamie?”

“He’s having a sleepover with Jasmine and Ryan over at the Harrington’s,” he explained and you nodded in understanding. You loved that Eddie and Steve were best friends and that their kids were growing up to be the same, “last minute thing, you know how kids are. It’s just us tonight.”

“Oh?” you raised an amusement as he snorted in amusement, “you know what that means-”

“It means you need to hurry up and shower and come back to me," he flourished his hand, before grabbing the knife and going back to chopping, "because tonight we won't be interrupted by a little visitor."

“I’ll be back in fifteen minutes or less!” you practically ran up the stairs to your bedroom, ripping off your clothes as you grabbed a fresh set of pajamas. It wasn't too late into the evening but you weren't about to put real clothes back on; instead you settled on the most comfy pajamas you had, which were a pair of Eddie's boxers and an old, cozy sweater. Definitely not the sexiest outfit but perfect for a quiet evening in. 

By the time you made your way back downstairs over half an hour had passed and Eddie was dishing up dinner. Your eyes widened at the sweet gesture and it was then that you noticed the pretty vase with all of your favorite flowers on the dining table.

"Oh, my love," you were touched that your sweet, adorable goof of a boyfriend had remembered your favorites and done this for you, "this is amazing. You are amazing."

"I…" he trailed off as he looked you over, big brown eyes growing soft, "wow."

"What?" You looked down at yourself in confusion before turning back to him, "what's wrong?"

"You're so fuckin' beautiful,” your entire face felt like it was on fire from his sweet words. You shook your head, wondering what had gotten into him, but he immediately shook his head as though he could hear the words in your head. He reached over and gently took your chin in his hand and turned your face towards his, “I mean it.”

“I’m wearing ratty old pajamas, my hair is wet, and I’m pretty sure I look like I haven’t slept in two weeks,” you wrapped your fingers around his wrist and brought his hand to your lips, pressing a gentle kiss to his knuckles, “but thank you.”

“You’re always beautiful,” he promised as he took your hand and pulled you towards the table. You sat down and watched as he set a plate full of all your favorites in front of you, followed by a freshly opened bottle of beer. He did the same for himself and sat down next to you, motioned for you to dig in, “I hope it’s okay. I know you’re the chef in the family but I tried.”

“Eddie,” he loved the way you said his name, almost like a prayer, so gentle and reverent, “you could have made boxed mac and cheese and I would have loved it. Thank you for this, seriously.”

“Anything for you, baby,” he insisted softly as you nodded, “you know that.”

“What’s the occasion?” you grabbed a forkful and shoved it into your mouth as he paled. You raised an eyebrow and swallowed it quickly, “for making all of my favorites.”

“N-nothing,” he said quickly, his voice climbing an octave. You knew that whatever had been on his mind earlier was clearly still stuck in there, “just wanted to do something special for my girl. Tell me about your day, baby. I’m guessing from your sigh that it was either bad kids or bad parents.”

“Both,” you groaned before launching into a full rundown of your day. Eddie listened intently, making you laugh when you needed it and otherwise providing a listening ear. When you finally got it all off your chest, feeling so much better than you had throughout the day, you asked Eddie about his day and listened just as he had. 

The two of you just worked so well together, meshing into each other's lives as though it was always meant to be. And, you supposed, that’s exactly what it was.

After dinner, you cleaned up the kitchen before deciding that the whole evening called for some ice cream and a movie. Eddie even let you choose the film, and you settled on a romantic comedy that you’d been wanting to see. You knew it wasn’t his favorite, but he always watched them with you and you knew that deep down it wasn’t too bad for him either. You promised to watch a horror movie of his choosing in return, and he eagerly accepted your offer. 

Throughout the movie you could feel his gaze shift back to you. He clearly wasn't paying too much attention and had something on his mind. Once you were finished with your bowl of ice cream, you set it down on the table and turned to him with a sigh.

"Edward," your use of his full name caught his attention and he turned to you with a sheepish smile, "what's going on? Tell me."

"N-nothing-"

"Bullshit," you groaned, "you've been acting off all day. Is it something I did or said? Are you okay?"

He looked at you for a long moment before letting out a heavy sigh and getting off the couch. You looked at him in confusion, hoping you hadn't said something to upset him. You watched as he quickly ran upstairs and you could hear him fumbling around in the bedroom before coming back downstairs.

"Eddie?" You weren't even sure if you should be worried or confused or…something but you were starting to panic.

"Baby," he stood in front of you and you could see his hand trembling with nerves, "I, ugh, this isn't what I planned at all. Not like this but umm, I gotta do it now or I'll never be able to."

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"W-what? No," he shook his head fervently, curls bouncing around, "the opposite actually. I-I love you so much. I never expected to meet you or fall in love with you or anything. I just assumed I'd see you twice a year at the dentist's office with my kid. But that obviously changed, and now we're here. And you, you've always been so good to me, and you've been so good to Jamie and I never thought I'd meet someone that loved both me and my son. And we love you so much, and you're just…what I've always been missing and wanting…"

"Eddie?"

"I wasn't planning on doing this tonight but you're just so…everything that I can't not," he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box, dropping to his knee before he opened it. Oh. This definitely wasn't what you had expected - at all. He opened the blue velvet box and inside sat the prettiest ring you'd ever seen, "will you…will you marry me?"

"Yes," you didn't even hesitate for a moment but then quickly realized the gravity of it all, "wait - you want to marry me? Like for real?"

"For real for real and forever," he grinned as he pulled out the ring and reached for your hand, delicately slipping it on, "the question really is do you want to put up with me forever?"

"It's not putting up with you," you promised, "not with someone you love. And obviously the answer is yes. I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you and Jamie."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," he admired how the ring on your hand looked before pulling you in and kissing you sweetly, "I love you, so much. I'm sorry this wasn't the most romantic thing in the world."

"This is perfect," you insisted, "I love you more than anything."

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You stared at the stick in your hand and then up at your reflection in the mirror. It was almost like you didn’t know if you should trust either the rest or yourself. But a million emotions started swirling up all at once and with all the other signs that had led you to getting the test in the first place made sense. The little stick exclaiming pregnant wasn’t wrong at all. 

“Holy…fuck,” you whispered to yourself, still in disbelief, “how am I going to tell them?”

“How are you going to tell who and what?” Eddie. Of course your husband had to come home and upstairs at that exact moment. Him and his perfect timing; you could practically curse the universe for it. He was grinning, all big and dopey, at you as he leaned against the door, “what’s wrong, baby? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Y-you’re here…”

“I am here…in my home after work,” he held up his hands and waved them around as you swallowed thickly, “alright, out with it. What’s up?”

“Here!” you practically shoved the white plastic stick into his hand, squeezing your eyes shut as you anticipated his reaction. You were almost positive that it wouldn’t be bad, but your stomach still churned with nerves…baby you supposed.

“What the fuck,” he whispered it so softly that you almost didn’t hear it. He looked at you with wide eyes as he held up the test, “you’re pregnant?”

“Uh huh,” you nodded dumbfoundedly as you shrugged your shoulders, “I-I guess so.”

“Wow,” he opened and closed his mouth a few times, looking like a fish out of water, “you’re pregnant.”

“I’m sorry,” it blurted out before you could even think about; it was just your natural instinct.

“Baby, why are you sorry?” his face fell as he wondered if you didn’t want to have this baby at all. Maybe you were upset at the positive test while he felt exactly the opposite way, “do you not want this?”

“No, no, no - I do,” you promised and he relaxed slightly, “yes, god, yes I do. I just…it’s habit? I feel like a kid right now, pregnant and feeling a hundred different emotions right now.”

“Well, princess, I’m happy to tell you that while you are pregnant, which I am very, very excited for, you’re in our home and we’re married and have things kind of figured out.”

And that was enough to make you feel better and relax…but it also made tears well up in your eyes as you studied your husband, “I’m excited too. Nervous, but excited.”

“C’mere,” he set the test down on the counter and pulled you in for a hug, wrapping his arms tightly around you as you melted into his warm, soft body. Eddie could feel your tears soaking the fabric of his shirt, and he responded by pressing soft kisses to the side of your head and rubbing your back in soothing circles, “I love you so much. I can’t even imagine what you’re feeling, but fuck I’m so in love with you. There’s no one else I could ever imagine doing this with.”

“Really?” you looked at him with wide, teary eyes and he nodded softly before pressing a kiss to your lips. 

“You’re already an amazing mother,” he reminded you, causing your heart to swell. You loved Jamie so much, just as though he was your own, which you knew he basically was. At the beginning you worried if the young boy would ever accept you as his stepmother or even tolerate you. But it was so much more than that - you were his mother and he was your son. And now you were adding another little Munson to the mix, “and you will always be.”

“Thank you,” your lip trembled with effort as you tried not to cry and Eddie couldn’t help but kiss away your pout. He didn’t stop until he felt you smiling against his lips, “you’re an amazing dad, best friend, husband…everything.”

“Flatterer,” he teased as you giggled at him, “we’ll figure it all out together. And if you ever want to kick my ass for knocking you up, I give you full permission.”

“I’m sure - no, I know, I’ll take you up on that offer at some point,” you shook your head at your husband’s silly antics, “no we just gotta figure out how to tell Jamie.”

“You can just tell me,” you heard his small voice as he padded into your bedroom and jumped onto the bed. You and Eddie exchanged a look before he shrugged at you as you sighed softly. These Munson men were going to be the death of you. 

“Should we?” you asked him under your breath as Jamie watched the two of you intently.

“It’s up to you, mama,” he kissed your cheek, “he might just explode if we don’t tell him…or he’ll figure it out in a day or two.”

“He’s too smart,” you agreed before sliding past Eddie out of the ensuite and over to Jamie. You crouched down so you were almost eye level with him and tenderly brushed a few rogue curls out of his face, “oh, my love. Daddy and I…we have some news to share with you.”

“Are we getting a dog?” his big, brown eyes practically glittered with excitement as you chuckled softly at him.

“Not quite buddy,” Jamie looked at Eddie in confusion before turning back to you. You were ready to go out and get this sweet boy his new dog and whatever else you wanted. But…you were pretty sure that was just the hormones talking…no need to get too crazy just yet.

“Oh…what is it then, mama?”

“Umm…well,” you swallowed the lump that had welled up, “we’re having…you’re…you’re going to get a little brother or sister soon.”

He was quiet for a moment and your heart started to hammer in your chest as you worried that he was going to be upset. That would definitely have crushed your soul a little bit. But then, you heard him gasp excitedly before he threw his small arms around you in his best attempt to hug you; you didn’t hesitate to tightly hug him back, “finally! When?!”

“It’s going to be a little while bud,” Eddie answered softly, coming over to sit on the bed next to his son. He leaned over and kissed the top of his head, “mama’s gotta grow them first.”

“Wow,” he looked at you with nothing short of awe as you beamed at him, “I’m gonna tell all my friends! I’ve been wishing for a brother or sister for s’long now. Finally!”

You exchanged a look with Eddie, both of you laughing softly. This was everything you could have dreamed of and more.

“Ahh, I love you both so much,” Eddie pulled you both in for a hug, squeezing you until you and Jamie were giggling wildly, “my three favorite people all in my arms.”

And yeah. This was everything.

[charmedreincarnation]

hey charm !

i have known about manifestation for years now but i still have a problem with it. so basically, i know for sure that i’m going to enter the void but i don’t know when. everytime something happens in my life, i’m like "it doesn’t matter anyway bc i’m going to manifest my dream life". i have been daydreaming all the time for years so it’s very natural for me. as i see myself in stories that my brain creates, i started doing the same for my dream life. now, i know exactly what it will look like and i live those scenarios in my head like if they were really happening.

the problem is that when i want to enter the void, i’m always trying (i don’t really see myself succeeding) bc i’m scared that if i put too much effort in it or if i really believe it and i don’t succeed i’ll be discouraged.

i really don’t know what to do bc i realized that if i continue just trying and thinking "i’ll get my dream life later" i’ll never manifest it. also i don’t understand the wish fulfilled state bc i feel like i’m already doing it by daydreaming and being sure that i’m going to have my dream life. i want to convince myself that i can enter the void and get everything i want RIGHT NOW and not "later if i’m lucky enough". i feel stuck and i don’t know what to do anymore to keep going.

i’m sorry for the long ask and my bad english…

thank you 🤍🤍

Hi love, first and foremost your English is even better than mine so don’t apologize, and secondly I struggled with this so badly I completely understand.

It's easy to feel stuck waiting for what you want to come to fruition. Even though you might sense that your desire is on its way, it can seem far off, like it's in the future instead of the present. Time passing can make this feeling even stronger, even though time is always moving forward, which makes it even more contradictory. But feeling comfortable and sure that what you want is already yours is the important feeling. By focusing on the idea that your desire is already part of your life, you will shift from waiting for the future to feeling like your desires are already here and now. That's why it's emphasized in the community that you should allow yourself to believe deeply in the fulfillment of your desires right now.

When you really embrace the natural feeling of knowing that your desire is already a part of your life, you will naturally align your thoughts and feelings, with the state of having what you want regardless of the method or technique you’re using to achieve it. That’s what helps me feel confident about making my desires a reality.

seriously understand what you want isn't just something for the future; it's a part of your life right now.The process of manifestation isn't just about daydreaming or imagining your desired reality though that helps. It's about deeply believing that what you want is already real. Shifting your mindset from waiting for luck to deserving and capable of having your dream life will always give you comfort. Also to overcome feeling stuck, i liked practicing mindfulness and using affirmations. Being mindful will help you stay focused on the present, while affirmations helped strengthen my belief!

It's also helpful to detach from the need for immediate results. By letting go of the pressure for instant success, it should reduce your anxiety and allow your inner world to work its magic while staying true to your intentions. Because regardless of how long you think it will take, if you understand it’s immediate and time is passing regardless you will stop trying to fight with the concept of “waiting.” I also recommend reading my time post and this one as well!

Regardless It's natural to feel unsure at times, but start by nurturing your belief in the wish fulfilled state and keep doing what else keep your mind at bay with knowing you really don’t have to do anything unless you want to. Because you’re always doing eveything right

[marianasue]

for sydcarmy truthers , a similar situation I shared with carmy .

Before , I discover this beautiful fandom , I watched the bear as someone who knows nothing about its plot , and I had no idea about what´s going on in the show , but when I finished watching it , first thing I said at that time : ´´something too deep is going on between syd and carm ´´

and carmen story with claire , reminds me of myself and a boy who is a friend to me , and maybe if you know my story , you can have a real exemple about how carmy is feeling . I hope you all understand it :

I´m the yougest girl in my family , and all the focus was on me , so my parents protectiviness and awarness grew more complicated trough time , and it becomes a real probleme and because of it , I was a shy kid , and I was bullied in school , I didn´´t have any interest in the education , I was and I still fond of art and I spent my time is school , just drawing .I really wanted to have friends , many friends , but I pretended to be someone else , just to attract people and I never liked it . so during high school , everybody loved a boy , he was handsome , nice , intelligent , he was really every girl´s dream and of course he was our neighbour and my family know him . he was alway there for me , he was very nice to me , he was always sitting behind me , his over protectiviness and social personnality always reminded me of my dad and mom , I felt like he was controlling me , even everybody was trying to convince me that he was more than a friend

and this is really annoying because he was the opposite of me and he was good to everyone .

so time passed , and everybody are still believing that he is my boyfriend , he is now a doctor , and I´m still studying art because I stopped my education after high school and I have returned just last year .

we still seeing each other , he was the same person I knew but this is what happened : he confessed , that he loved since we were at high school and he wants to be with me , so I just said to myself : it´s ok mary , just try , he is your first crush , ´´ and oneday we went to a dinner with his friends , and I had a panic attack , they were asking me how we met , and how he is popular and loved in the hospital , and they were saying that I´m lucky and he didn´t say anything about me to them , he was just watching me panicking and he knew that I have problemes in communication and social events and I find myself pretending to be out of my personnality again . after that , the feelings that I had were very bad , you feel like you´re just stupid person , and you don´t deserve a good thing . He is and was a pressure to me , I didn´t feel peace with him , we didn´t have the same dreams , he was always seeing me as the little shy mary , he still has that picture of me .

so , I decided to end everything and confortting him about how I feel and I discovered that he is not the right person because during the argument , he wanted to convince me that I´m the wrong person , like nobody made me feel shitty , it was all myself , and we just end up like we are just friends .

I moved on from my family house , and I´m studying the thing I love , I´m working in a coffe shop and I have good friends toward me , and I´m acceptting a new love now , someone I´m really greatful to have him , someone understands me .

that´s why I was really attached to the bear and carmy , I know what does it mean to live in a complicated family and have someone like claire in your life .

carmy just need to move on and forgive his past and all the people around him and of course accepts a new love to his life , like I did and many people must do .

I just wanted to share my story and say : not every perfect person is perfect to you . he may be loved by everybody but not by you .

@thoughtfulchaos773 @gingergofastboatsmojito @bootlegramdomneess

[jellyrabbitz]

𝓜𝓪𝓷𝓲𝓯𝓮𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓦𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓔𝓶𝓸𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼

Don't ever suppress your feelings in the name of the law of assumption or attraction.

Contrary to popular belief, feelings do not manifest; if you get sad over something and spiral for a little, that doesn't mean you're going to somehow attract more misery into your life, or that your manifestations will instantly fall apart.

Allow yourself to process your emotions. You don't have to remain in a happy or fulfilled state at all times to manifest. Many of you in this community seem to think you have to keep your 'mental diet' in check, but I don't believe it's necessary. Forcing yourself to think only positive and happy thoughts 24/7 is exhausting, isn't it? When I first joined this community, all it did was burn me out. I even began to experience lower back and hip pain because of how much I held in. Often I found myself thinking, "Why do I still feel so miserable even though I've supposedly been doing everything right?"

It's because shoving down your frustration and agony only riles it up more until it rears back up angrier and gnarlier than before, like a nasty untamed beast.

Don't be like me and simply let the emotions roll over you instead of fighting them. They're gone much quicker when you allow them to come.

Look, your manifestations will come regardless of how you feel. Think of it this way, you might get pissed over how long it's taking your package to arrive, but it's still on its way to you. So let it all out because there is nothing to worry about, you aren't going to ruin your 'package' just with some silly emotions. Seriously, don't listen to whoever came up with the whole 'negative emotions ruins your manifestation' bs.

Besides, 'perfect' people have their bad days as well. I see some coaches saying, "if you were your desired self, would they be having this negative thought?" Yeah, she might actually, because she's still a human being and not some unreachable goddess without emotions. Even people with their dream lives have negative thoughts just like anyone else. This idea that our 'ideal selves' have no negative thoughts or emotions EVER feels ridiculous to me.

Let's face it, it's normal for a lot of us in this community to feel discouraged. Trust me, I get it, it may look like nothing is going your way and this is all pointless. You might check the 3D and wilt when you realize nothing seems to have changed. There's nothing wrong with that! Checking the 3D is a normal thing for us to do-just like checking if our package is on the way-and I honestly think 'ignore the 3D' or 'the 3D isn't real' is harmful advice.

The way I like to see it is that the 3D is merely a reflection of my old and shitty thoughts that isn't permanent, and whenever I manifest it's like I'm planting a seed.

Instead of trying to force yourself to believe your 3D is perfect now, (which is extremely difficult for those of us who have terrible circumstances and can also be bad for your mental health) it may be better to acknowledge your current situation but know that it's changing.

I'd like to give an example from my own life, since I know my wording may seem confusing to some. A few weeks ago I received the news that my uncle was bound to die very soon, and they were putting him on a ventilator. Obviously I was upset after hearing this, and I allowed myself to wallow in sadness for a few minutes. Everyone around me was convinced he wouldn't make it.

Although I was miserable, I still persisted in the thought that he would pull through. I didn't even do any of my usual methods such as scripting and just told myself, "I know he will make it."

A few days later my aunt called me overjoyed. The hospital suddenly switched up and said he wasn't doing as bad as they thought, and he wouldn't even need the ventilator!

See? I still manifested even while I was sad, even while I had doubts, and he made it through. This is only one example of many.

You can manifest while feeling any emotion, even the acrid ones that feel like they're eating you up inside. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

[folklore-barnes]

My Grotesquerie Theories

warning: spoilers maybe if you're not up to date✝️

Marshall and/or Charlie are the leaders of the cult. But I'm leaning more towards Marshall. The sequence of him in the hospital getting a little agitated because he didn't want Eddie or Megan to say goodbye to Lois was CREEPY. The way he entered the scene and how he conducted himself as the music played in the background was insane and I literally thought to myself “is this man the devil or something?”.

Someone also mentioned that because it is alluded that his students are very loyal to him, it would make sense for him to be a cult leader.

Satanist rituals might be the motive. Clues to this could be the puzzle that Lois was doing in her home, which was of Francisco Goya's Witches Sabbath. Another clue could be the repeated use of goat heads and how the crimes seem to be sort of a mockery or challenge towards Christian morals, teachings and values. We've yet to see the real crimes, but it is said in the trailer that they're basically a copy of the crimes in her dream, except more calculated. So I wouldn't rule this out. Plus, Megan and Charlie had also mentioned in the dream that satanism could've been a motive.

Charlie is the devil or something along those lines. Listen... for some reason I've been getting the feeling that Dr. Charlie is also evil, and it's all in the boots. I saw someone in here say they think he's the devil and I've contemplated it too. There's just something about the boots...

Charlie and Megan are also together in real life and have a nun/priest kink. Somehow, Lois knows this.

Eddie will be recruited or already has been recruited by Marshall to execute some of or all the killings.

Megan will find out that Charlie is in on the killings and will confront him, causing him to attack her or threaten her. There's a possibility she joins him. I'm 50/50 on it. Source? the voices.

No but seriously, I saw some clips in the teaser of the next three episodes and she is seen being attacked by someone with a white coat and I've convinced myself it's him.

The killer or brains of the operation knows Lois and has been by her bedside while she's in a coma. They have told her everything they plan to do in the town, which is probably why she saw all the murders in her coma dream before they happen. Source? Also the voices...

But also, seriously, in the first episode, Nurse Redd tells Lois that patients in a coma hear and feel a lot of things. So I feel like her dream was affected by both memories, perceptions and what she has been hearing. Of course not all dreams make sense, so we don't have to make sense of the whole thing. It's possible they want to explore the idea that she predicted the murders, but if she didn't, my guess is she heard about them while in her coma.

Everyone is in on the murders except Lois and Merritt. Having to survive together is what will lead to their reconciliation.

I think that's abt it, Might be more coming up, if I pick anything up or remember anything else I've theorized.

[alessiamalfoyzabini]

Dark Moon | Chapter Fifteen - The End

Pairing | yandere!Jimin x Reader

Word Count | 3k

Warnings | +18, yandere themes, wedding, Stockholm syndrome, murder, smut, messy bathroom sex, fingering, blowjob, teasing, vaginal sex, unprotected sex, body worship and kissing, this is not for minors

This fanfiction is yandere, if you don't like the genre, don't read and if you are not of age, don't read.

I don't want to hear any complaints in the comments, thank you.

This does not reflect my way of thinking or living at all, it is just a work of fiction, it is like watching a horror movie, many of us love horror movies, but we would never dream of what we see in those movies happening in reality as well.

Simply put, this story was written for entertainment purposes, it should not be seen as a reflection of my values, opinions or morals. I absolutely do not condone such acts.

⤷ Summary | She just wanted to escape her past, take charge of her life and break out of her steel cage, praying in God for a miracle that could change her life for good.

And her prayers were heard, but it was not the Divine that answered her.

That was certainly the devil in the guise of an angel, she thought as those corrupted and empty eyes searched her soul with extreme voracity.

He turned a sweet, false smile on her, before pushing her into the abyss.

➢ Author's Note | Hi, guys ❤️

This is the last chapter of Dark Moon, a story that I wrote in a period that was not easy for me, in fact the dark tones come from the negative emotions that pushed me to write this story to test myself with this genre, so I really hope you enjoyed Dark Moon, I would be happy to receive comments about it ❤️

As for possible extras, who knows, maybe they will come just like what happened with Happy Ending 😉

Also, it was really nice to be able to talk with you! Thanks for all the love and support, see you with the next story I am already writing 🤧

Taglist: @katherine-kookie, @dragons-flare, @m00njinnie, @seokjins-luigi, @pjmsneverland, @jimincrystal, @ajkwww, @ungodlyjoon , @hecateslittlewitchling , @namjoonsbuspass , @darkuni63 , @xicanacorpse , @jiminismine4ever , @btssimpjaneth , @antisocial-mochi267 , @reallygenerouskoala , @velvet-stardust2002 , @angelicsmilesworld

Chapter List - Previous - The End

"Where is Y/N?" asked Taehyung, receiving a glare from Jimin.

"Stop it, Taehyung, she's afraid of him, and I'm certainly not going to force her to attend because you think it will help with her trauma," hissed Jimin, looking around.

He had let Y/N fall asleep in his arms before silently leaving the apartment to finish her uncle's execution.

Taehyung wished she was there, he argued that seeing her own nightmare die would help her heal faster, Jimin on the other hand was convinced of the exact opposite, she had run away from the bastard, dead or alive she never wanted to see him again, that was the gist.

"It was just an idea..." put the other's hands forward.

"Jimin, everything is ready" Hoseok warned him electrified, it had been a long time since they had proceeded with a real execution and this was the time to enjoy another one.

The boy nodded as he continued down the dark corridors of their base with the others, the room they were holding the man in was a cell like any other, it was only the way they were torturing him that differentiated the prisoner from the others.

Mikkel was bound hand and foot by a thick rope, which went to twist around his neck with a noose still wide enough not to suffocate him completely.

He stared at everyone with spirited eyes, and Jimin noted how disgusting and repulsive the man looked more like an ugly gray rat.

"You have the wrong man, I'm just a loan shark, the Kims would never say anything important to me," he licked his lips nervously, he had a horrible accent.

Jimin walked around him, his shiny black shoes made a sinister ticking sound.

Heel, toe.

Heel, toe.

He stopped in front of him again, bending at the knees.

"The Kims are our allies, we don't need to know shit about them," he said squaring him with disgust, "And we certainly wouldn't use shit like you for our own purposes."

Mikkel looked around agitatedly, Jungkook rocked back on his own feet, smiling cheekily at the man.

"Then why am I here?"

Jimin's eyes thinned, "Let's clean up, Mik," he said making the man fidget, "Does the name Y/N mean anything to you?"

Surprise and panic soon won out and he began to struggle, unaware of the damage he was doing to himself, the more he moved the tighter the noose around his neck tightened.

"You thought you were getting off scot-free by abusing a little girl who was part of your own family, threatening her parents and then making the poor mother look like a fool," Jimin began, approaching until he could read every distorted thought in the man's increasingly swollen eyes, "You took advantage of their miserable financial status and threatened to throw them out on the street if they talked, even naming certain acquaintances, who didn't like the publicity you gave, so... one way or another you're dead anyway," he growled, grabbing the knot and pulling to speed up the choking.

Mikkel coughed airlessly, tried to wriggle and escape Jimin's death grip, but to no avail, the more he moved, the more he urged Jimin not to let go.

"That's nothing compared to what you put Y/N through, you son of a bitch," he shouted, throwing a punch at the man now with no more air in his lungs, blood began to come out of his nose as his body was invaded by jerks and survival impulses, he cried out mute for mercy, but the boy's eyes remained stone.

Jimin backed away retrieving his gun, but when he pointed it at the monster he had second thoughts, with one bullet he would have died too quickly, so he just watched along with the others as he suffocated in the ropes and his own blood, in the last moments when Mikkel looked desperately at Jimin once again, the latter smiled.

"Y/N, my wife, sends her regards and wishes you to burn in hell," he greeted him amusedly, emphasizing how Y/N was now simply his.

When they saw the eyes turn glassy, with no more life behind them, Hoseok huffed.

"That was too fast," Jungkook commented, pulling out his own gun and unloading it on the body to make sure he was really dead.

"He's dead, that's all that matters," said Seokjin who had been merely observing in silence, "Get rid of the corpse cleanly, I don't want any surprises," he ordered, but everyone's attention was on Jimin.

"Wife?" asked Taehyung with a smile.

"He actually said wife, this jerk decided to settle his head," laughed Namjoon, interrupted by Yoongi who also laughed.

"No, that little head will always be crazy."

"So you're getting married with a celebration?" asked Jungkook, joining the confused chorus of questions and jokes.

"My guess is he's already signed papers, he seemed overconfident," reasoned Hoseok, both Jin and Jimin were getting nervous.

"Listen, you-!"

"When and how they get married is Jimin's and Y/N's business, as for us, we must realize that there is a new family member to protect," he clapped his hands vigorously, "Now, get rid of the body," he repeated.

Jimin nodded in Jin's direction in thanks, then turned to Jungkook, "Make sure that not even the bones can lie on this earth, you understand what I mean, right?"

Of course it was clear, the seriousness and awareness of having to do one's duty well had returned to the room.

The ceremony had been small and for a few friends, Jimin did not like to show off, and Y/N could not bear to see unfamiliar and dangerous faces staring back at her.

The wedding dress, on the contrary, was wonderful.

It wrapped the girl's figure gracefully, her shoulders were uncovered thanks to the bodice's boat neckline, which was white with light blue highlights and had many small flowers woven along the neckline and hips, it then continued with a long skirt made of silk and fluffy tulle, with her hair made slightly wavy and scattered loosely on her back and the thin, shiny tiara placed on her head, everyone had agreed that she was an adorable and pure fairy.

Jimin, for his part, in his sleek, total-black smoking with crystals sprinkled across his chest and shoulders, had never taken his eyes off her, like a hawk aiming at its seductive prey. There was a change in him too, his hair had been dyed blond, for Y/N had been like seeing a fallen angel waiting for her at the altar, she had smiled shyly at him arm in arm with Seokjin.

It had been frightening to meet him again initially, but in time she had realized that if taken gently, Jin was by no means evil and had always been very calm and gentle with her.

Now she was there, joining her hand with Jimin's, and emotion invaded her.

She paid no attention to the priest's words, the ritual they were performing was being handed down in the Bangtan band, it was the man who had to do everything, the bride simply had to say,

"Yes, I do."

It had been so easy to say it, no hesitation, no flash of fear, she looked at Jimin through the foolish eyes of love, he lowered himself onto her who discovered she was swept up in a fiery and electrifying cloud, when their lips touched Jimin held back no longer, he held her by the waist and pulled her into a deep and dead-end kiss, he was possessive and passionate and sought her out every time she tried to catch a breath.

The few guests applauded, giggling at the fierce hunger of the blond, who let her go only to gaze contentedly at those swollen, scarlet lips of kisses.

But it was not his intention to stop there.

They accepted the congratulations of the Bangtans and some of their relatives, Y/N met Taehyung's mother and father and found them a delightful couple, almost unable to believe it when the father said with some pride that he too had been a Bangtan before his son.

In contrast, there was no sign of Jimin's parents, probably not even knowing that their son was alive.... From what Jimin had confessed to her one night, his mother was a street prostitute and his father was a singer who toured the world, Jimin had been born by mistake.

Y/N had immediately rebuked him, he was not a mistake, he was her complex and sweet boyfriend, although he had not been a saint at first, now he was showing her that he was a caring partner and madly in love. Perhaps even too madly.

"Anyway, my husband and I wish you well and happy life together," trilled the woman, gently pinching the cheeks of the girl, who blushed under such motherly attention; now she understood why Taehyung was the most affectionate of his friends, he had not grown up with terrible parents.

"Treat her well, Jimin... it's not easy to find someone who understands and accepts our kind of life," he tapped the young man's shoulder with a hand that was anything but playful, despite the boxy smile his son had inherited.

"Oh, I'll treat her like a queen," he smiled sweetly, but Y/N saw the shadow of something more evil, something that manifested itself exactly forty minutes later, when everyone was now occupied with the banquet.

"W-We'll have to wait," stammered the girl, trembling under the velvety kisses the young man was leaving all along the portion of skin the cleavage had left, free to be cuddled and adored by him, "If you leave me marks they will show!"

Jimin laughed on her neck, "I won't leave you any marks, I just want to have a taste," he promised, licking down to the cleft between her breasts with his erection pressing into his pants.

He cast a glance at the girl and let out an approving cry, he had taken her in his arms making her sit on the sink, her back was resting against the large mirror behind her and her legs were held open, with the skirt pulled up over her hips and the white fishnet stockings on display, all for him and she was so sexy in his eyes...

"You've already had a taste this morning!" hissed Y/N, glancing occasionally at the bathroom door.

Jimin returned to leave moist trails of kisses on her chest, suddenly lowering her bodice and noticing to his pleasure that she was totally naked, Y/N gasped praying that nothing had been torn off, cast a reproachful glance at the man, melting away soon after, however.

Jimin's condition was no better, his once perfectly coiffed hair was now messy and scattered across his forehead, his tuxedo jacket had been tossed into some corner of the bathroom, and his dark, gleaming shirt had been opened by almost every button, which made her quietly admire the invitingly toned appearance of his abdomen, cased with deep attractive and manly lines, with her hand she followed one, entranced, to his waistband where a more than obvious bulge made her throat tighten.

Jimin licked his swollen lips stained with her lipstick, "I can't go back that way."

"No, you can't," murmured Y/N as she got off the shelf and knelt in front of him, who inhaled in eagerness to touch her.

She took off his leather belt and lowered the zipper of his smartly cut pants, watching raptly as his cock pushed against his boxers, there was already a wet spot staining the fabric, and she licked gently there, already finding the taste she now knew by heart and could no longer do without, Jimin clenched his fingers around the edge of the sink until his knuckles turned white, with a small smile the girl also freed him of his men's underwear and finally took the swollen, heavy shaft into her mouth, standing still for a few moments, trying to get used to that girth once again.

"Fuck," breathed Jimin tremblingly, his balls clenched as he registered the image he was experiencing, "Oh, fuck, you're sucking me off in a wedding dress," he cursed, risking coming immediately, Y/N closed her eyes and holding her breath swallowed a few more inches until her nose brushed against the man's pubis and she felt her throat fill with his cock, she slid over the entire length again, licking insistently the sensitive frenulum area, her intimacy was on fire when she noticed the tremor in her husband's legs, giving him pleasure gave her pleasure, it was a sensation she had never experienced with anyone else. It made her feel powerful and weak at the same time.

Jimin moved his pelvis against her mouth, each discharge was a violent lash that he needed, the tone of his voice rose, and, they were both sure, if anyone passed by the bathroom door, they would hear a man enjoying thanks to a dreamy blowjob.

"Y/N, stop," he ordered in a guttural voice, but the woman sucked harder on his entire length, letting her saliva slowly slide all over his cock to make the job easier, in response Jimin grabbed her head, giving one last thrust that made her choke for a few seconds before releasing her completely, "Get up," he hissed, his taut and vibrating cock was already on the verge of releasing his cum.

The girl licked her lips with a sly smile, pleased that she had reduced Park Jimin to a quivering little thing, as if grappling with his first blowjob, but Jimin was not of the same opinion.

"You little bitch."

He made her turn, bending her over the sink and raising her glitzy skirt over her hips again, that position was the same as that night before everything went to hell, but she didn't feel the suffocating anxiety of the first few times, with time she had realized that Jimin would never hurt her again, and now she quivered every time she found herself bent over with Jimin behind her, watching her desire-laden body.

The blond man pulled her panties of the same color as her fishnet stockings, felt her intimacy with two fingers to see how wet it was and found it deliciously soaked and quivering, he hummed with satisfaction at that result and penetrated her lightly, Y/N opened her mouth sighing, her belly contracted recognizing that pleasurable stretch between her yielding flesh.

Jimin removed his fingers now soaked with her wetness and used them to gently caress her swollen, sensitive clitoris as he penetrated her all the way down, slowly sliding his cock into her who more than welcomed it, Y/N's head dangled forward as she responded to Jimin's rhythmic thrusts with hushed, choked moans, the fingers around her rosy bud amplified the sensations of the cock pinning her down in that bathroom, where everyone could have found out in a very few seconds what was going on.

"Oh God ... oh God ...!" she exclaimed unable to say anything else, Jimin went deeper with a sometimes desperate cry.

"My wife," he sighed in her ear, bending entirely over her with his hips clicking faster and rougher, "I'm fucking my wife," he gasped causing her walls to clench as they flickered in mad pleasure, with wide, glazed eyes she listened to Jimin repeat those words, she loved hearing him say them, her heart was swollen with love and pride, now no one would dare to hurt her, ever again.

The blond lifted her up against his chest, fixing his eyes straight into hers through the mirror that gave a sinful image of their bodies joining sensually, he held her tight like that as he intensified the rhythm of his thrusts, by now sinking into that slippery heat breathlessly, his hand worked under her skirt faster, Y/N moaned seeking his lips, Jimin also penetrated with his tongue into the young woman's mouth, pinching a florid nipple as a provocation.

It worked, with a shrill scream between their joined mouths Y/N came violently, clutching his cock that discharged moments later in her belly between thick boiling filaments, they continued to move in unison until the pleasure turned totally to discomfort due to overstimulation.

They sighed exhaustedly, but without moving.

"I told you not to leave marks on me, but you did worse," she laughed wordlessly, observing his devastated state, not that Jimin was any better off.

He kissed her neck gently, leaving her, who groaned annoyed at the loss.

"We have a valid excuse now."

"What excuse?"

"Well..." he helped her up her bodice by lacing it from behind, shooting her a mischievous look, "To get out of here without anyone noticing and finish in our room what we started."

Y/N widened her eyes, "We can't! They came here for us and then I'm too tired now to-" she could not finish the sentence, Jimin took her in his arms without any effort.

"It's our wedding, we can do what we like," he said with a smile that gave him a cheerful and absolutely adorable air, "And I want lots of children," he blew on her lips kissing her repeatedly, she laughed between their lips, unable to retort.

She did not know how exactly she had ended up trusting her fallen angel, but she was sure of the fact that she was now hopelessly in love with him, as he was with her.

[tomorrowxtogether]

YEONJUN: “I’ll just keep trying till I make it”

TOMORROW X TOGETHER The Star Chapter: SANCTUARY comeback interview

2024.11.15

Let’s hear from the idol who has “nothing to fear” and who’s only grown stronger as he “hit it over and over down down down”: YEONJUN.

What’s it like getting ready to promote with the group again after doing promotions solo for your mixtape? YEONJUN: It put me at ease, honestly. (laughs) When I was working on “GGUM,” I was like, “Gahh!” having to take part in everything on my own, but when it’s with the group, I’m with them. But then it made me wonder if I wasn’t doing as much as I did for “GGUM.” Whenever I felt that way, I tried not to fall short. I kept reminding myself to work just as hard because our group album is more important—so I wouldn’t lose that.

I heard you were focused on your diction and the rhymes while working on “GGUM.” What were you mainly focused on for the new album? YEONJUN: My tone. Like having an overall light and airy voice, maybe? For “Heaven” and “Resist (Not Gonna Run Away),” I tried to make my voice dense and strong, and on “Higher Than Heaven,” for the line, “I’ll take you,” I imagined being able to hear the excitement in my voice and then sang it that way. I have a feeling MOA will really love this album, so I’m really excited. It has a completely different vibe from “GGUM”.

You also contributed lyrics for both “Heaven” and “Danger.” YEONJUN: Right after finishing the lyrics for “GGUM” and going, “Done! Sent it in today!” I jumped straight into “Heaven.” I wrote a lot of lines in the chorus, like, “heaven isn’t far, it’s now,” “the instant our lips touch,” “as long as you’re there, it’s heaven,” but it was really hard. “GGUM” is all about my own view, you know? So writing lyrics for the album was way harder than for “GGUM”. (laughs)

The lyrics to “Touch” (ft. YEONJUN of TOMORROW X TOGETHER) are interesting too. I felt like they really showcased the real you, like how you love food and watch lots of movies—a kind of condensed summary of what you’ve always said about yourself. (laughs) YEONJUN: Exactly. (laughs) And I used the word “ghosting” because we have a song called that. There’s also “YJ” from “GGUM,” which is there in the intro to the “Touch” remix, too. Our producer Slow Rabbit was the one who came up with the idea to put “YJ” in, and he got all excited and was like, “Let’s put ‘YJ’ in again!” (laughs) I liked that. When I heard it, it felt like it’s my signature now. And you know how we sing together from the pre-chorus all the way to the last chorus? That wasn’t actually part of the plan—it got added in after recording. Just a little behind-the-scenes tidbit for you there. (laughs)

That makes me think of how you said you wanted to show more of yourself as an artist, starting with “GGUM.” What does that side of you look like exactly? YEONJUN: I’d say someone who sets trends. I see myself as someone who can make anything work. When it comes to music, at least, I want to try out a ton of different things, and sometimes I want to convince MOA of that by trying new things like that. I think, like, How will it help my music if I don’t explore musically or take any risks?

I see you’re aiming even higher when it comes to music. YEONJUN: I’m always thinking about how important it is to make sure the music tells our story, whether it’s with the group or on my own. I’m the kind of person who wants to be recognized for my continued work in the field and I’m really driven to do a good job. My mindset has always been, no matter what I’m doing, I’ll just keep trying till I make it. And I think that’s really important. Putting my story into the music is always going to be a tough task, but it’s a good challenge. I want to keep dreaming big.

Is that why you wrote on Weverse that you’re happy with your work–life balance? (laughs) You’ve been really busy this year with all the touring, your first solo mixtape—GGUM—and working on a new mini album. YEONJUN: I was overflowing with excitement every single day I was working on GGUM. I actually get anxious when I have some downtime. I was working on the mixtape, getting ready to promote with the group, and featuring on “Touch.” Crushing it all made me feel like I’m at peak life and productivity. I was secretly proud of myself—like, I’m straight fire! (laughs)

And even with all that going on, you streamed an Essence of Dance🦊 on Weverse LIVE. That isn’t exactly the easiest kind of stream, either, given you have to have everything memorized and dance on the spot. YEONJUN: Right. (laughs) But MOA’s always waiting. I already said I’d do it, but it kept getting pushed back because I had other obligations, and even still, MOA was so understanding, and it just made me feel even sorrier. So I ended up squeezing it in after deciding I should do it before “GGUM” came out, even if it was short. I usually keep at it until I’m happy with it, but I was so physically drained that day, unfortunately. (laughs)

You must have felt really proud when “GGUM” finally came out after all you went through. YEONJUN: I knew it was the one the second I heard it. It’s hip hop but has a pop feel, and it’s sexy and mysterious at the same time. It feels really multilayered. It made me happy to see people all over social media covering my song and the dance moves. Even my friends used the gamja-ggang joke on me, and they’re never like that. (laughs) I thought, Whoa, they know my song? Every single reaction was great. And hearing MOA chant my name that loud and clear—like, “Choi Yeonjun! Choi Yeonjun!”—was amazing. Now I have even more things I want to say through my music and more musical styles I want to try, and I love my work even more now. I’d say it’s a combination of, “it was really fun,” and, “it’s exhilarating,” but at the same time, “I’m not fully satisfied yet,” maybe? (laughs)

Why aren’t you fully satisfied? YEONJUN: I tried a lot of new things with the group and with “GGUM,” obviously, but I think there’s still more I haven’t tried yet. I’m a big rock fan, for example. I’ve done a lot of pure, emotional rock with TOMORROW X TOGETHER, but if the chance comes up, I want to try some really hard rock, like, “Let’s tear it up!” When I was working on “GGUM”, I started thinking about trying an R&B ballad, too. There’s different subgenres even within hip hop and R&B, and I want to try the ones I’ve never done before. I really just want to try a wide variety of things.

In the ‘YEONJUN’s Mixtape: GGUM’ MAKING FILM making-of trilogy, you were open about the struggles you experience as an artist. Even though you always work in front of the camera, wasn’t it still a lot of pressure to document the whole process? YEONJUN: I actually feel that I need that pressure to give me that extra push. In my everyday life, I try to keep things chill—put on some chill music, watch movies, eat—but when I’m working, pressure motivates me. (laughs)

Is that what let you send in your rough lyrics for the first verse of “GGUM” without any hesitation? You didn’t seem worried about getting feedback. YEONJUN: I used to feel a lot of pressure, but I think my personality has changed a lot. It’s inevitable that the lyrics will be rejected more often than approved when I send them over, to be honest, so it’s better to just send them right over and get the feedback back quickly to get rewriting. That’s why I don’t feel pressure about feedback anymore. I don’t find the whole, “No good? Okay, I’ll give it another shot,” thing hard anymore. (laughs) If it were before, and things didn’t go my way or something stressful came up, I’d be distracted by thoughts all day, but now I just take a deep breath and say, “It is what it is.” Kinda like TAEHYUN? (laughs) That’s exactly what TAEHYUN says.

Your MBTI changed too, didn’t it? YEONJUN: Yes, it did. Actually, it’s always been the case that, whenever I do an MBTI test, sometimes I get a type N and sometimes a type S. But then I kept getting ENFP for the longest time and that didn’t sit right with me somehow. I always thought I was sort of imaginative, so it made me think I was still a type N! (laughs) But when I took the test again recently and still got a type S, I was like, I guess I just changed. Now I can acknowledge that I changed, and that’s kind of a weight off. (laughs)

You said you used to be the kind of person who couldn’t show anything that wasn’t fully polished. I guess that’s also changed, seeing as you made the process behind your mixtape public. YEONJUN: Hmm … True. The promotional period’s all wrapped up now, and I wanted to show people how I might’ve been lacking at first but that I’ve slowly grown since then. MOA usually only ever sees our highlights, really. I wanted to give as much of a glimpse as possible into my work behind the scenes, like pitching ideas for concepts and finalizing the choreography with everyone. I also wanted to show how it wasn’t just me but all the staff putting in so much effort and how we all worked together to make the most amazing thing we could. I feel like the staff cooks the whole meal perfectly and I’m just there to set the table. I think it’s our responsibility to tell people about how much hard work the staff puts in and make sure they get the credit they deserve.

You also mentioned in another interview with Weverse Magazine last year that you never want to forget that you can’t take anything for granted. YEONJUN: That’s a mindset I plan to cling to until the day I die.

Is there a reason why it’s so important to you to stay humble? YEONJUN: Is that being humble? It seems obvious to me that you can’t take anything for granted. I really stress that a lot when I talk with the other members: We should never take this lifestyle for granted. We also have to be thankful. We get way more than we deserve.

Then I guess that’s why, in the MAKING FILM, you said, “They were like, ‘There’s gonna be a lot of pressure and you’re gonna be really busy.’ As soon as I heard that, my heart started pounding.” YEONJUN: Oh man. I guess I’m just destined to be an idol. (laughs) I used to think I had a really weak mindset—like, bad—but now I think it’s good? (laughs) Everyone goes through rough patches. Me, I’ve practically collapsed while promoting and felt frustrated before. Endless torment and pressure have crushed me many times. That’s the reason I thought I just had too weak of a mindset to be an idol, but after I “hit it over and over, down down down,” I toughened up, you know? (laughs)

Before shooting the music video for “GGUM,” you recorded yourself, pretending the camera’s MOA and getting some things off your mind, expressing how you were feeling anxious and afraid. Talking it through on Weverse could’ve been an option, but you seem more like the kind of person who likes to deal with things yourself. YEONJUN: Yes, that’s true. I used to be the kind of person who would turn to others immediately, but I worry I’ll become overly dependent on them. I thought that constantly talking about having a hard time was making me weaker. I was also worried that the other members or my family especially would feel concerned or that I’d be placing a burden on them if I opened up to them, so I started to bite my tongue. I think I should just know how to deal with problems myself. Sometimes I think I’m no good or hate myself, but I try to love myself. I mean, I have to.

But in “GGUM”, you sing that you’re “not alone, got ma team by my side.” The whole group was there to support you at the music video shoot, in the practice studio, and at the pre-recording. YEONJUN: I really felt those lyrics. I realized I’m really not alone—that I really do have my team at my side and a whole army to back me up that I can rely on. That was my first time shooting alone for that long and it made me feel a little lonely. I could really feel the group’s absence, but I was so grateful to them and so touched that they kept coming by periodically to boost my spirits, even though they were all busy with their own things. And Huening coming by himself, just grabbing a taxi and coming by with dakgangjeong, was so sweet of him. It was so thoughtful. I really appreciated it.

Just like you said in the MAKING FILM : The group comes first. YEONJUN: The group always comes first, no question. The group comes first in everything.

[my-own-walker]

Something you like…

summary: evan and you are dating, but he can’t help but need some…validation.

warnings: stupid fluff, sm*t, then more fluff-ish (because i’m a softie, what can I say?) Evan x fem!reader

+++

‘Alright, alright,’ he choked out between deep belly laughs. ‘So let me get this straight,’ he began.

‘Stoooopppp shut up I KNOW its stupid!!’ I protested, trying to get him to stop his oversimplification of my admittedly funny issue.

‘No, no, babe I wanna unpack this,’ he laughed, ‘so you heard from your friend that there was something suspicious in the trash can and you decided to investigate…as someone with clinical anxiety.’

I nodded, casting my eyes down and feigning upset, giggling quietly to myself.

I had just gotten home from work and Evan made dinner. It was a kind gesture he’d do every time I had to work late. This time my lateness wasn’t exactly intentional. In that, it wasn’t really…work related.

‘So in hearing the noise coming from the trash can - the public trash can, might I add - you decided the right thing to do would be to call the cops?!’ Evan was laughing so hard he couldn’t even eat.

I’ll admit, it was super funny. I overreacted to beeping in a trash can outside the building I worked in and called the cops. Someone threw out their phone and was trying to call it. My mind went the…explosive route. I guess I thought I was in a movie or something.

‘Baby, you are so cute. I can’t stand it,’ Evan cooed, tucking a piece of my hair back behind my ear with his free hand. ‘Even though it wasn’t entirely rational, at least you’re safe.’

‘In my mind it was so real. Like I was convinced someone planted a device. I thought it was an evil scheme,’ I clarified, still laughing at myself.

Evan and I had been together for about a year and a half. We moved in together rather quickly after we started dating. We had known each other for some time before that.

Well, better than known. We were hooking up, to put it frankly. We met through mutual friends at some party in LA.

One day, though, he decided to pull the trigger and officially ask me to be with him. More seriously. I kinda laughed at him when he did. We were fast friends, constantly making each other laugh. I was okay with things being casual. I wasn’t too emotionally invested, and it seemed like he wasn’t, either.

I had no idea how he felt about me until we had that conversation. And I quickly realized that I felt it, too. We had slowly fallen in love and I didn’t even recognize it.

Nonetheless, being with him was a dream. I had never imagined finding such a perfect match in a person.

Staring at him over that dinner table, I still had butterflies in my stomach. Much like the first time I met him. The way the corners of his eyes crinkled when he smiled made me swoon. The veins in his hands entranced me. Everything about him left me wanting more.

‘Like what you see or something?’ Evan quipped.

I didn’t even realize I was staring like a creep, not saying a word.

‘God I’m sorry, I’m a million miles away, haha. Just thinking,’ I replied.

‘Oh, so you don’t like what you see?’ he smirked.

I rolled my eyes and placed my elbows on the table, lacing my fingers together and looking him dead in the eyes. ‘I promise you, Evan, I always like what I see when I look at you.’

‘Yeah?’ he raised an eyebrow, challenging me.

‘What? You want an itemized list or something, Peters?’ I joked.

‘What if I said I want you to show me?’

+

Before I knew it we were upstairs, hungrily ripping layers of clothing off each other, keeping our lips firmly pressed together.

‘I adore you,’ he breathed between kisses, swiftly throwing his sweater behind him. ‘You are my world.’ He pulled down his sweatpants and kicked them off. He wasn’t wearing underwear. His erection sprang out dramatically, showing me how much he wanted me.

He pushed me onto the bed and unbuttoned my jeans. He slid them off quickly and climbed onto the bed. I was left in just my panties, soaking wet already.

He pinned me down by my wrists, which were over my head thanks to the way he tossed me down. He leant down, putting his face close to mine.

‘Tell me,’ he growled as he tore off my panties. I was surprised by his urgency. ‘Tell me what you like.’

Fumbling for an answer to such a vague question, I replied ‘y- uh, your hands, your veins.’

‘Yeah?’ he challenged. ‘Okay…’

He let go of my left wrist to stroke my face with his right hand. The anticipation was too much to bear. He swiftly entered me with his fingers. I couldn’t help but yelp out in pleasure. His fingers explored me, finding just the right spot that made my toes curl and my face screw up in ecstasy.

Just as I was about to reach my limit, he stopped. He removed all contact besides the longer strands of his hair tickling my face as he hovered over me, resting on his fists on either side of me.

‘What else?’ he demanded.

‘Evan-‘ I whined, squirming from the loss of contact.

‘Tell me. Or we won’t continue.’

‘Your lips. They’re soft and pink and I love how they feel on me,’ I pleaded. I needed his touch.

He curled his mouth into a sick smile. The kind of smile that made my insides flip. He promptly started kissing me all over.

He started slowly, making me burn intensely inside. First at my neck, then collarbones. He stayed on my chest for a while, taking his time to really ensure my pleasure. When he reached my lower stomach, he took a brief intermission to drag his tongue all the way back up the center of my body. An acknowledgment of how close he was to what I actually wanted. He wanted to tease me.

He gently spread my legs open and began kissing my inner thighs. Then his tongue hit my middle.

‘Fuck, you’re so wet,’ he moaned.

I cried out in passion, feeling warm droves of intensity coursing through my entire body. Again, he removed himself from me. I whimpered helplessly.

‘Tell me one last thing. One last thing and I’ll let you come, baby,’ he negotiated.

‘Your cock,’ I managed.

And that was all she wrote. He slid off the bed. Standing at the end of it, he pulled me roughly by my legs toward him. He lined himself up with my entrance and thrusted into me.

I watched as he squeezed his eyes shut and bit his lip. His head went back and his mouth opened with a guttural moan. I was in no better shape. The feeling of his length inside me at long last was enough to satisfy me for a lifetime. My eyes rolled back into my head as I feel his thrusts get deeper and closer together. He was close, and so was I.

I came with a loud scream, unable to control myself after waiting for so long. He smiled slightly as he continued to fuck me, obviously satisfied with his handiwork. He came soon after.

He removed himself from me and I slid up further onto the bed, my head now resting on silk pillows. My hair was stuck to my face thanks to my sweat and my breath was ragged. He joined me, crawling up onto the bed and laying on top of me, resting his head on my chest.

‘That was fun, huh?’ he declared.

‘Yeah,’ I sighed, ‘fun for you.’

His head snapped up. ‘You didn’t like it?’

‘I didn’t say that, now, did I? You weren’t the one getting teased the whole time, man,’ I retorted.

He chuckled and shook his head, placing it back down on my sweaty chest.

‘I really love you, Y/L/N. My everything,’ he said in a sing-song-y voice.

He breathed in a deep, cleansing breath and flipped off of me onto his back on the bed. After all, it was hot in there. I didn’t blame him for needing a second of space.

‘Well just so you know, Y/N, there are plenty of parts of you I like, too,’ he bargained. ‘Y’know, just in case you ever want to play again.’

I looked over at him, taking in his beauty. My breath hitched in my throat, as if I were seeing him for the first time again. Like I said, he had that effect on me.

‘I may have to take you up on that.’

+++

BYE okay lmao that was another attempt at spicy content. I hope you enjoyed, you horny bastards. Sending you all my love.

[arbiterlexultionis]

Shoot for the moon, wind up amongst the Stars

So, obviously Danny loves space. Exploring it, experiencing all it has to offer, being among the first humans to step foot on other worlds, taking off in a rocket on a mission to take one small step for man has been his dream ever sense he was old enough to even know what it meant to dream. Danny is also a Fenton, and regardless of what his grades may say he’s smart, really Really smart. To an absurd degree, even for a Fenton, especially in matters of engineering. Blueprints were his picture books, college textbooks his bedtime stories and his parents old recordings of their Ivy League college engineering courses his Saturday morning cartoons. Even if he didn’t have the actual strength neccisary to do it he practically knew how to pull apart an engine before he had a good enough comprehension the the English language to give a half decent explanation of what an engine is. Each and every part known and understood on the deepest level possible, moving in his mind exactly as they should before he could even spell their names. A six year old Jazz damn near had a stroke when she found her two year old brother that she promised to protect from her parents weird Sci-Ance pulling apart the microwave and figuring out how to use the magnetron to send signals that he could detect on the family computer. By the time Danny was in “real” classes in elementary and moving onto middle school he was more than capable of helping his parents pull apart thrown away technology too piece together wonderful machines, and the only reason he didn’t was because he preferred to work on his own projects(It took Jazz nearly three hours to convince him that taking his homemade 7300 mW laser to school to make Dash stop shoving Tucker into lockers was a bad idea).

One night, Danny’s in phantom form flying through the sky’s of amity starring up into the endless inky black and blue of the night. Taking in the countless new details his enhanced physiology lets see, experience even without the aid of a telescope. Reminiscing about the dream he lost when he lost half his life. Mourning both those losses. Sure, he’s been to space but it’s not the same. He just sheds the pull of gravity and lets himself rise, it’s a magical experience in and of itself but it’s not the same as strapping himself into the spacecraft of his own design and embarking on a journey to the stars. It’s cheating. But it’s not like he’ll ever get the chance to experience the real deal, even if he could pass the physical there’s no way he could make it to NASA now that all his grades were in the toilet. And it’s not like he could achieve it in some other way, random civilians can’t just build spaceships in their basem…..

Danny stops mid air. He thinks. The specter speeder. Jack and Maddie built the specter speeder in their basement. Jack and Maddie built an honest to god spaceship in their basement. It could survive in the vacuum of space and under the weight of the ocean, operate in and out of atmosphere with or without gravity. It was a spaceship in every way that mattered, and they just Built It because they felt like it. And Danny was more than capable of producing technology of a similar level. He could do it, he could build a spaceship with his own two hands and let it carry him to the stars, to his dreams.

Danny’s rushing home before he even realizes he’s moving, a whirlwind around his room gathering up all his old designs, empty blueprints and reference materials. He spends more than an hour in a hyper focused state drawing up a slightly modernized, very Fentonized version of a Saturn V rocket. He’s barely a quarter of the way through the spitballing process of coming up with the design when he realizes he may or may not have over looked a very important part of the whole “screw it, I’ll do it myself” approach to getting to space, materials. There’s a limit to how many resources can go missing from his parents lab and how many charitable donations Vlad can generously(unknowingly) make to the cause before they all notice and start asking questions. So his designs are, unfortunately, put aside for the time being. He is disheartened for a moment, and in an attempt to cheer himself up he reaches for the nearest space themed entertainment he has, a Star Wars comic. The he stops, looks at the freighter on the cover of the comic. A lot of sci-fi ships are pretty small. Small enough to build without getting asked to many questions.

He spends the next several weeks tearing through as much sci-fi comics, movies and TV shows as he can, binge watching YouTube lore videos about Star Wars, Halo and who knows what else. After that, it’s time to get to work.

Weeks later, Lancer is standing on his porch on a nice, quite Saturday morning. It’s a habit he got into years ago, taking in the peace of his small little town in the early hours of the morning before it’s had a chance to wake up and start a ruckus, coming to appreciate and enjoy it even more now that ghost have been causing havoc and partaking in a little bit of bird watching while he’s at it. Slowly taking sips of his still far to hot cup of coffee, he stairs into the sunrise, taking in the countless colors and artfully blended shades. This is it. This is what he loves about his city. The quite beauty of it, so easy to miss and even easier to adore. What he loves about his job, the beauty of a new day, of the future, and all the possibilities it holds. Even if he does far to much work for far to little pay, it will all be worth it if even one of those students he has helped grow and learn go on to become doctors, police and engineers, saving lives and building the prosperous future they all deserve to live in. He breathes in, and then out. He is content.

A black spec appears on the horizon, undoubtably a flock of birds. Excellent. He begins to look through his binoculars, mentally trying to guess what species they’ll be when taking into account the time of year and day. He search’s through the sky for a moment, before going absolutely still. He lowers his binoculars and takes a long, long sip of his still scolding my hot coffee. It burns, he can feel pain, so he’s probably not dreaming. He looks back at the black spec in the distance, takes a long, hard look at it through his binoculars. It is still very much not a flock of birds. His is now 99% positive that it is exactly what it looks like. He breaths in, breathe out. He is no longer content.

Ten seconds later the easily identifiable UFO flys directly over his house, the iconic and extraordinarily loud screech of an imperial TIE fighter following it. His car’s alarm blares, as do the alarms of nearly every other car on the street, which is almost loud enough to mask the sound of alarms going off on the neighboring streets. He turns around, and walks back inside. Stops at the whiteboard he has hung on the wall by the door.

‘Note to self- give Mr. Fenton detention on Monday. P.S. bring a pack of disposable face masks and warn him of the dangers of flying a high tech spaceship where federal agents can look through the cockpit window and see him piloting it.’

At the very least he needs to tint the windows. Maybe make the window a one way mirror, and add some chrome detailing while painting the rest of the craft vanta black? That would surely look. (he glances at the guide to being hip for the unhip he has laying on his counter still open from last nights reading) Sick? Yes, it would surly look sick. He should also probably try and talk him into adding some cameras and such to the thing, that dome window has to have terrible visibility. At least a backup camera so he can parallel park and keep and eye out for any fighters trying to line up shots behind him.

[earlgreytea68]

Host: So where did this one start? Patrick: So, uh, typically I kind of just start with Pete's lyrics and see what that inspires me to, you know, how does this sound? You know, when I read this, what do I think this sounds like? Host: And when Pete sends you those lyrics -- So, is Pete working on lyrics all the time? He's just working on lyrical ideas and then -- Does he ever put a tune to it? Or does he send you a blank page? Patrick: No. He doesn't even send me lyrics in lyric form. He just sends words. And it's interesting when you see it. It's almost like one-liner after one-liner. (chuckle) And I'll just get an email of those. And then you kind of have to-- Neal: The Henny Youngman of lyrics? Patrick: (laughs) Yeah. And then you have to -- Kind of. It's like the -- My dad had a Yogi Berra quote book sitting on his coffee table. It's kind of like that, where it's just one-liner, one-liner, one-liner, and you have to figure out what thematically goes together, what feels like the same song. But then also I do try to keep things together as much as possible, because I feel like he's in a place where it does feel like one thought, you know? And, um -- But yeah, when he sends it, that's all he sends. There's no music or anything. And so when I read there's a kind of, for me, almost passive thing, where I read it and just imagine what it sounds like to me. And so this one scared me a lot because it felt kind of sparse, and I don't really like sparse, I don't really like singing by myself, I don't really like -- You know, I like orchestras, I like being one musician out of, you know, hundreds. I don't really like being so front and center, and I could tell there was something really intimate about this song and that was a big challenge for us. Well, for me. Everybody else seemed convinced. As soon as I finished demo-ing it and I sent it out to everybody, everybody went for it. This I think is the first song that we started, or one of the first songs that we started, Neal, when you and I got together. It's from the first session. And, you know, we had done that first session of "are we going to work together?" This came from that first session. But I think we also spent the longest on figuring out how to actually realize it because I wasn't satisfied with just my voice. With just my voice over keys, it was killing me. It was too naked or something. And I needed more of a story happening with the synths and stuff, with the guitars and all of that. So that took us a long time. Host: Interesting. And is Heaven, Iowa a place? Patrick: I believe so. I don't know if it's real or not. I believe it's the place from "Field of Dreams." Pete was really obsessed with "Field of Dreams." There's something in that story that really, like, set his vision for the whole record lyrically, I guess, so I think that's what it is. But I don't ask. I try not to ask about his lyrics because I feel like there's a thing about it where -- First off, he gives you terr -- He will not explain things. But second off, it also kind of -- I think there's something to that, you know? Where I'll read his lyrics and I'll interpret it one way and years later I'll realize it's another way. There's so many double entendres that I've only gotten, you know, decades later. (chuckle) I'll be singing and I'm like, "Oh, it's a sex thing! I didn't catch that." You know? (x) (this is around 45 minutes in)

[aroeddiediaz]

A confession

If there’s one thing Eddie can give credit to the Catholics for, it’s that they build beautiful churches. Dim light streams through the stained glass windows, making the images of the Virgin Mary and Jesus glow. His shoes click on the glossy marble floor as he passes rows of empty pews. 

He enters the confessional and sits. The priest’s voice comes through the grate in the wall. “In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.”

“Amen.” Eddie’s mouth is dry. He clears his throat and speaks, voice measured, but with a thread of uncertainty in it. “Bless me father, for I have sinned.”

“It’s been, oh, 18 or so years since my last confession. I haven’t really kept track of when I stopped doing this. Uh, I’m not really sure where to start.”

“That’s quite all right,” the priest says. “Start with what’s troubling you most.”

“I fucked up- sorry, messed up. I messed up badly, and now my son won’t speak to me. It’s been months and we still haven’t been able to have a real conversation.”

The priest said “I see. Would you mind telling me my details of what happened “

“I cheated on my girlfriend. Well, sort of to be honest, it wasn’t exactly cheating. We never did anything. The thing is, she looked exactly like my late wife. Shannon. I knew it was messed up from the beginning, but I felt like it was fate or something. Like it was a chance for a do-over. My first marriage was rough. We married young, mostly because I got her pregnant. And then I joined the military. I thought I was supporting her, but to be honest, I was just running away. I wasn’t scared of the baby, I think. 

What I was scared of was becoming like my parents. My dad, he was an engineer, and he often had to travel. And that put a strain on his marriage with my mom. They tried to keep it from me, but I would hear them having whispered arguments in the kitchen at night when I was asleep or over the phone. And my mom wasn’t happy, because she needed him, and he wasn’t there. So a part of me was afraid. Afraid of that even if I tried, I wouldn’t be able to be better than my dad. So instead, I found a nobler  reason to run.

The thing is though, I don’t know if we would’ve been able to have that ideal relationship, the one I used to dream about seeing when I was a little boy. Shannon and I had our fights. Even after I came back from the war, I couldn’t be emotionally available to her, and she couldn’t handle the burdens that I placed on her, so she left me. I was drowning on my own before I moved to LA. Then I found support. And then she came back. I thought that I could fix things. Make sure she wouldn’t want to leave me again. But as much as I cared about her, I think maybe what I loved the most was the idea of our relationship. 

She asked me for a divorce, Two days after that, she died. I guess no matter how hard I tried. I couldn’t get past that. I thought I was doing things right. I thought I was being enough. But there was something that I was missing.

I tried to fix it, in my other relationships. I thought that the problem was the burdens that we went through when we were still young and we made mistakes. So when I dated Ana, I tried to be the perfect partner. Then I got shot and she ended up helping to nurse me back to health. and I think I realized during that time that, despite all the emotional labor, each of us had put into that relationship, it never felt like a relationship that should be long-term. It felt like we were both acting the parts of a play. I just wish that I broke it off sooner.

So then I thought maybe the issue was the expectations I placed on the relationship. I went into my relationship with Ana thinking that I needed to find a replacement for Shannon. I needed a new wife and a mother for Christopher. When I dated Marisol, I tried to let go of those expectations and just do things naturally. But I think I was convincing myself that if I waited long enough, those feelings would eventually emerge. But they never did. I just ended up feeling guilty here and guiltier overtime because we were dating and we were getting to know each other better, but my heart wasn’t really in it. And that’s when I saw Kim.

I shouldn’t have pursued her. But I think that a part of me hoped that if I could get closure from someone who looks so much like her, that I would be able to fix whatever was broken inside of me,whatever it was that wouldn’t let me move on. I was certain by that point that whatever my feelings for Shannon were, however complicated they were, that was the closest thing to true love that I had ever experienced. And I hope that if I confronted them with someone who could help me move on, then I would finally get over this weird mental block I had with Marisol, or someone else.

It was wrong. I think I knew that the whole time. But I didn’t stop until my best friend found out what was happening and confronted me. I told Kim everything. Well, I didn’t tell her about Marisol. But I thought that would’ve been the end of it.

Kim came back though. She actually tried to dress up like Shannon, she cut her hair to look similar and she changed her clothing. And she got me to do this role-play where I could bear out my grievances, and when I did, I thought for a moment that maybe this was it. I could explain to her why her breaking my heart hurt so much and how she had changed something inside of me.

Of course, that’s when Christopher and Marisol walked in. Marisol broke up with me of course, and Chris wouldn’t speak to me. He even got his grandparents to come pick him up and take him back to their home in El Paso. And he hasn’t come back yet.

I thought Kim would help me fix me, or help me find clarity. But I’m more confused now than ever.

I think now, that as much as I liked, and admired, and enjoyed being around Shannon, that maybe, I was never actually in love with her. I think maybe I can’t. I know what love is. I love my son. I love my friends. I even love my parents, even though I’m more frustrated with them now than ever. I think the love I have for Shannon is the kind of love that I would feel for anyone who has gone through so much struggle with me, but not the kind that a husband should have for his wife.”

The priest is silent for a long moment. “You have been through a lot, it is not a surprise that you are confused. I think that you have an idea in your head of how a relationship should look. But that is not what is necessary.“

Eddie says, “I know that a marriage doesn’t have to be what the church considers right. I know that it doesn’t have to be a man and a woman and two kids and a picket fence. But I have seen how happy my friend and her wife are. I have seen how happy my coworker has been with his wife who was previously in an abusive relationship, and I have seen my captain and his wife have found new love despite both of their spouses' untimely deaths. I’ve seen how my best friend looks when he’s in love, when he’s heartbroken. What does it say about me that I don’t think I’ll ever feel those feelings? What does it say about me that I destroyed my bond with my son and hurt him so badly in pursuit of it?“

The grate between their booths in the confessional obscures the priest’s face, but when he glances through he can see a gentle smile. “It means that you are different from them. And that is not a bad thing. It does not mean that you are broken, or that you are wrong. Maybe you won’t fall in love. Maybe you will never find what kind of relationship you have wished for. But that does not mean that you won’t have fulfillment. You love your job, right? You love your son, and your friends. Maybe others have told you that you need more in your life to be truly happy, but I think that as long as you’re being truly honest with yourself, that is what matters.”

Eddie isn’t sure he can just accept that, not yet. Not when the distance between him and Chris is still a gaping wound. Still, it’s nice to hear from someone who should be condemning him for his failures that he can fix things. “Thank you, Father.”

[eribeen]

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･UNSPOKEN FEELINGS °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

A/N: hi! This is Eribin. I am not a real writer, doing this as my past time. English is not my first language so bear with my English. There’s a lot of grammatical and typographical errors. This is just a fiction from my delusions 😆

NOTES: ITALIZED MEANS FLASHBACKS

Warning: drinking, angst

Words: 1800+

CAST:

Ryuta Hidaka BBZ as himself

Miku Fukahori BBZ as himself

Y/N

Ryuta's POV

Y/N was a mess when she arrived at my apartment, tears streaming down her face. She didn’t say a word as soon as I opened the door; she just threw herself into my arms, crying. I had no idea what had happened, but she soon began to tell me how she had caught Miku, her boyfriend, kissing another girl. She couldn’t stop sobbing as she described the scene. From the way she described the girl, I suspected it might be Kaede, Miku’s ex—tall, fair-skinned, with short hair. Kaede had left Miku to chase her dreams of becoming a model, and from what I knew, she had become one of the most successful models out there. I hated the thought of Miku still being stuck on her, but I never thought it would lead to something like this.

I felt guilty. I’m friends with both Y/N and Miku, though they’ve never met. I always thought they’d make the perfect couple. I’ve known Miku the longest, and he’s always been a stand-up guy—loyal, caring, funny, and ambitious. I thought he was exactly what Y/N needed. As for Y/N, we met through my work at LDH, where we collaborated on music projects. She has great taste in pop music, and we worked together a lot. I thought they’d be a great match, so I pushed them to meet. At first, Y/N wasn’t interested, but eventually, I convinced her. They hit it off, and before I knew it, they were officially together. I was happy for them, really, but deep down, I regretted setting them up. I wished I were the one she’d chosen, but I didn’t have the courage to tell her how I really felt.

"You know what, I have a friend. He's single. You want me to introduce you to him?" I asked her, trying to distract her from her while working on a project.

She paused for a second, then smiled weakly.

"Nahh.. I'm too busy. No time for that!" she said, brushing off my suggestion.

But I didn’t give up. I kept pushing until she agreed, and when they met, it was like they’d known each other forever. They clicked. They started dating. And just like that, I felt a pang of jealousy, though I kept it to myself. I was glad for them, but at the same time, I couldn’t help wishing things were different. I was too much of a coward to confess my feelings. I couldn’t tell her that I had wanted to be the one by her side.

"Tell me, Ryuta, what's wrong with me? I know that I am pretty. Have a decent job that pays me well, I am kind, I am lovable, I am--"

I interrupted before she could continue because I knew what she was going to say. There was nothing wrong with her. She was everything anyone could want.

"There's nothing wrong with you, Y/N. You know what, rest. And tomorrow you two talk."

But she wasn’t listening. She poured herself another drink, her voice shaky as she continued, "He didn't pick up my calls. He really abandoned me and our relationship."

I knew she was getting drunk, and I needed to keep an eye on her, but I didn’t know how to make her feel better. It killed me to see her in so much pain.

"I am sorry, Y/N. This is my fault. I should've seen what was happening with Miku. If only I--"

She cut me off by pressing her finger to my lips.

"Shhhhh... it’s not your fault, Ryuta. If there's anyone to blame here, it's me. Probably I was not a good girlfriend at all. I am not the one he's looking for." She said, and her tears started to fall again. It broke my heart. How could Miku do this to her? Y/N was everything good and kind, and she deserved so much better.

As the night dragged on, Y/N’s tears slowly stopped, and the silence between us grew. I watched her as she stared blankly at her empty glass, her red-rimmed eyes hollow with sadness. I sat beside her, my heart aching, unsure of what to say or do.

"You know what, Ryuta," she whispered, her voice barely audible, "If you were probably the one I dated, I wouldn't be hurting like this."

I froze, my heart skipping a beat. Was she serious? Or was it just the alcohol talking? I turned to look at her, but she was staring down at the glass in her hands, too drunk to meet my gaze.

"Y/N..." I managed to say, my voice barely above a whisper.

"I know I can't change what happened, Ryuta," she continued, her voice fragile, "But I'm grateful for your friendship. You've always been there for me."

I nodded, my throat tight. "I'm always here for you, Y/N. No matter what." I wanted to say more, but the words caught in my chest. I wanted to tell her I cared for her, that I had always cared for her, but I couldn’t. I was scared. Scared that maybe she didn’t feel the same. That maybe I wasn’t enough.

The silence between us stretched, heavy with the things I couldn’t say. Y/N’s words echoed in my mind: "If you were probably the one I dated, I wouldn't be hurting like this." I wondered if she meant it, or if it was just something she said out of frustration and pain. But maybe, just maybe, she did.

"I don't deserve this pain," she said after a long pause, her voice trembling, "I don’t deserve someone who would make me feel this way, you know? I gave him everything. I thought he was different. I thought he was the one."

I took her hand without thinking, my fingers brushing hers. Her hand was cold, and I could feel her trembling, but she didn’t pull away. She didn’t say anything either, but we both understood what the silence meant.

"Y/N," I began softly, squeezing her hand, "You deserve someone who sees you for everything you are. Someone who never doubts you, someone who never makes you feel less than amazing." I paused, my heart pounding. "And I promise you, I will always see you that way."

"You're such a good friend, Ryuta," she said, her voice still soft but full of gratitude. "But... I don’t know if I can trust anyone anymore. I don’t know if I can even trust myself."

"I’m not asking you to trust anyone right now," I said, my heart aching. "I just need you to know that I’m here for you. Always. Whether it’s to listen, or to just sit here with you in silence. You don’t have to face this alone."

The weight of my unspoken feelings was suffocating, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell her how I felt. She wasn’t ready for that.

She looked up at me, her eyes softening, and for a brief moment, I thought I saw something in her eyes—something that made my heart race. She leaned in, almost as if she were going to say something, but she stopped herself.

"Maybe... maybe you’re right. Maybe I do deserve better." She met my eyes, her gaze searching mine, looking for something I wasn’t sure how to give.

I didn’t pull away, but I didn’t say anything more. I just smiled at her, offering the support she needed. It wasn’t much, but it was all I could give for now.

"Get some sleep, Y/N," I said gently, guiding her back onto the couch. "Tomorrow will be better. You’ll feel better."

She nodded, closing her eyes as she drifted into sleep. I stayed beside her, my mind racing with everything I hadn’t said.

But for tonight, it wasn’t the right time. Not yet.

(Ryuta and Miku, AAAAACCCCKKKK!! ❤️❤️❤️)

The end~ THANK YOU SM FOR READING MY STORY 😘

[fiveredlights]

the oversharement of the author: a completely unnecessary post containing my multitude of thoughts on takes one to know one

everyone has been so kind and wonderful about TOTKO so here’s a very, very, very, long author’s note which is me just rambling about anything and everything as a thank you for all the love 🫶

background

for those aware of the fiveredlights lore you may remember in april i had to pause updates because of some weird arm/wrist pain... so that was carpal tunnel syndrome and idk what i did to invoke it this july/august but it came back with such a vengeance that i did not think i was physically gonna be able to write this. but maxiel would not shut up in my brain so i got my hot water bottles and got to work.

this whole idea began after i saw travis kelce go on stage on the eras tour and i went... max and daniel absolutely possess the right type of insane to do something like this.... you can see the original thought post here

the albums

i thought making the albums would take me like a day. literally right up until i hit publish i was still making changes to Sidelines, and i had convinced myself they were real tangible albums with the amount of times i hit albums instead of the playlist button on spotify.

Second Place

the easier album, finished this is a day. cut songs were killer by phoebe bridgers and loml by taylor swift. i was gonna do a whole thing where i was gonna be like “oh the relationship killed him so much he abandoned the guitar to sing a sad piano ballad” and then i realised moon song is rooted in piano. so uh that was cut.

there also was a whole thing where his ex was personified as fire — “can the killer in me tame the fire in you” (killer) with “our field of dreams engulfed in fire” (loml) parallel that i really enjoyed but unfortunately never made it in. also loml has a lyric “the coward claimed he was a lion” which is fun with max adopting the lion as his symbol….anyways

the titled second place comes from another SMAU i used to write for a different fandom (on twitter so it is long gone, rip), where ironically it was also a singer/famous au and i was clearing out my spotify playlists and found the fake album and was like huh. i like that name. luckily for me it worked for the album storyline as well so good times!

Sidelines

this album changed at least fifty times. for the first three weeks of me writing it was called 3 (THREE) because I’m annoying like that, but the more i looked at it i could not convince myself daniel would call it that. because yes, it is his max album but calling it thirty three is a tad too much (in my opinion anyway). sidelines was always on the album, but i was going through my tik tok maxiel folder and saw a daniel edit to sidelines and was like okay yeah that's a better name.

out of 11 songs, only 5 of the original tracklist made it in. cut songs included:

call your mom by noah kahan

apple pie by lizzy mcalpine

orange juice by alfie jukes & nell mescal

orange juice by noah kahan

ivy by taylor swift

science by niall horan

who we are by hozier

with ivy there’s a lyric “and i’ll drink my husband’s wine” which would’ve been the way max and daniel would’ve been like “we’re married lol” but it was cut because to ME ivy is about sapphics cheating on their husbands with each other and i just can’t rewrite ivy like that. here’s some deleted scenes on that:

jeanie 🤠 @/COTADANIEL · i’m sorry daniel WHO’S WINE ARE YOU DRINKING????? driccrodeos [Video: Daniel on stage singing the lyric, “And drink my husband’s wine,” looking offstage to Max, before turning back to the audience and smirking, continuing to sing.] category five event has hit the maxiel towers noah @/ricciardanielo · this album has actually killed me. like i’m not on this earth anymore. why? ivy: “And I’ll drink my husband’s wine.” peace: “Give you my wild, give you a child.” @ max and daniel do you have something you want to tell us or??? ric33stappen if you attend the next race with a ring on your finger and a baby in your arms i swear to god max and daniel i will fuck you up (politely) #like i respect their privacy or whatever but also what the fuck #you know what i mean like what the fuck

in sidelines almost every single song (except for you could start a cult) has a daniel3.jpg post pertaining to a lyric... i realise maybe i should've had someone in universe point it out because i now realise it's quite difficult to spot. whoops.

daniel’s sidelines: live from red rocks is inspired by phoebe bridgers punisher tour (she flicks through the pages of a storybook), taylor swift era’s tour (the lover house) and noah kahan (we’re all be here forever tour; watched live from fenway park specifically on how to write his concert). the whole concert idea was also written literally 5 hours before posting because i originally had a max and daniel article but i could not write it.

easter eggs

i feel incredibly pleased that so many of you picked up on the easter eggs like i get why taylor swift is so insane about hers because it's just so much fun! (spoilers for the rest of my fics...)

blue sweater (thank you to ataraxiaa on ao3 who commented because I didn't realise i had done it) -> glitter on the floor maxiel's communal blue sweater

matthew (rriicciiaarrddoo) & callan (callonmax33) daniel would make a great TP -> old habits die screaming

jake 3(3)81racers Can Max Verstappen fight? -> glitter the floor chapter 3 & 5 recurring plot line

daniel's july 2 2025 post (Photo 2: Max and Daniel sitting in front of a fireplace, the person taking the photo is behind them. Max has his arm around Daniel’s waist, whilst Daniel has his right arm giving the middle finger to the photographer and head turned to the left with an annoyed expression. Max has his head tucked into Daniel’s neck, laughing into his shoulder.) -> inspired by glitter on the floor's 2024/6/7 monaco dark laneway posts

rriicciiaarrddoo "are george and alex married" -> a future easter egg for the glitter on the floor galex sequel

daniel's august 10 2025 post:

 A vase filled with tulips on a table with a white table cloth. -> glitter on the floor, last daniel3.jpg on 2023 has a vase full of flowers, was meant to signify that they got married

Two kookaburra garden statues, next to a rocking chair on a balcony. -> gary and steve from glitter on the floor

daniel's caption: The rumours are true, I am now in possession of half of Max’s WDC and they will be going on auction next week. -> fool me once

things five forgot to include because i have horrible memory but they canonically happened (this will absolutely be updated when i remember new things)

daniel ricciardo broke his hand whilst karting when younger which is why he gave up racing-> lyric in forever "broke a bone that never healed in my hand"

he gets into singing because grace and joe ricciardo put him in choir as a way for him to get out all his yapping and talking at least once a week so they can get a little peace (but it doesn't work because now he sings around the house)

real life references

sometimes i like to use a little reality so that the universe doesn't feel too far away and here's all the real life things i pulled from:

hair tuck max in f1tv japan interview: 2023 honda thanks day

daniel looking like darth vader in austin rain: 2023 monaco boat race

daniel wearing max's hat: 2017 baku podium

checo fought his way to finish p9: probably any race from the latter first half of the 2024 season

daniel ricciardo international relations expert: 2024 post belgium gp

twitter realises daniel ricciardo is hot actually: 2022 abu dhabi gp (the outfit)

daniel playing max's GP in his concert -> i saw adele pause her concert for the olympics womens 100m final so that's how that got in (also i did so much time zone math in order to make sure it was actually the right timing)

max and daniel escaping in a helicopter -> post 2024 belgium gp

[nebelihood]

Hey Arnold Study ENTRY01 "Arnold visits Arni"

GUuYS- As you may know I recently got re-obessed with Hey Arnold for a brief amount of time very recently. (Sadly I had to kill that obsession because of school and Looney tunes comic- but no worries, I'll try to come back as soon as the comic is finished jahsj qwq)

BUT I GOT LIKE REALLY OBSESSED LIKE SUPER- YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MANY HEY ARNOLD SCREENSHOTS I HAVE NOW- I HAVE A WORD DOCUMENTING EVERYTHING FROM ALMOST EVERY EPISODE (Except the ones from last seasons cause I was honestly tired of writting while eating and pausing and not being able to watch comfortably Hey Arnold-)

Dated 06/06/2023

Side note 01: I don't mean sl*ty in a demeaning way, I was trying to explain things to myself and let them clear to me x'0

Side note 02: This episode happens previously to "Married" episode.

Obviously the most interesting part of the episode was how Arnold switched Helga's personality to someone he actually developed feelings for and it wasn't too far away from Helga's real character like her poetry, her schemes to get closer to the guy she liked and general appearance. What's also interesting to note is how they changed the other characters, they basically switched their personalities between two characters, ex: Making phoebe dummer and Stinky smarter. Gerald more exaggerated and Sid cooler. Rhonda carless and Harold all about looks.

But when they switched Lila and Helga, Lulu came out more "sluty" and flirty. Traits that have nothing to do with Helga. And Hilda came out as inteligent and sweeter, which could be characteristics that could apply to Lila- only without her iconic "Ever so much" and exaggerated kindness. Those characters didn't seem to switch personalities. Maybe show unconscious beliefs of them?

It's a awesome episode to think about since it's all Arnold's dream so reflecting on the way he portrayed "helga" he must have some sort of idea of her, that she's nice deep down. Like he has confirmed he doesn't think Helga is mean for the sake for being mean in the Helga vs Patty episode. Like he has seen Helga act nice in the Rhonda costume party when she pretended to be Lila, like when he took care of her when she got amnesia and seemed too innocent, like when he convinced her to wash dishes and do the right thing. He must by this point, be almost sure there's a good nature underneath her despite how much she fights it.

About Lila... When they first started going out she was quite flirty. And she was also quite flirty when she went out with Arni, so maybe he perceives her attentions to certain degree a little sl+ty out of jealousy? idk just a thought.

Besides Lulu keeps Lila's way of communication "all so much about" "I'm all to certain that-"And the dream kept Arnold and Helga's tradition for crashing againts eachother. Making them essentially themselves and not them with switched personalities.

I think it's also interesting to see how Arnold also instantly fell in love"" when he saw Hilda. The first thing he asked was "Do I know you?" as to say she reminds him of someone he has seen cause he thinks he already knows her. The only possible answer is Helga.

IT's also interesting to see how Arnold bumped exactly with her as soon as she finished telling the moon if she would ever meet her one and true love.

I love Arnold's little shy hands hiding behind him, listening to her happily,,,

Arnold has witnessed to certain degree Helga reciting poetry like when Arni visited last time, so it's not crazy he made that connection to Hilda admitting she was reciting poetry.

"YEAhhhh"

ANYWAY in review, despite if he knows if Helga is a good person or not which at this point I'm sure he has a gut feeling, he must find her attractive rigth of the bait or at least feel attraction. Like when he complimented her the first time he saw her on "Helga on the couch" episode and because he doesn't even "know her" and he can't help to seem all goofy.

Note he also included Helga's "love sighs" on the dream, so maybe he has heard them before??

"I've never met anyone like you Hilda, and I really like you a lot"

He confessed to Hilda and Hilda confessed she liked Arni- This episode could be taken in two perspectives, one is that It's just like when Arni visited but this time is Arnold is Arni; so even if Arnold seems perfectly normal on this episode, he may have been a weirdo to everyone in town except to Lulu like it happened with Arni and Lila. This could be it but for wouldn't be completely accurate, Hilda would have had already been obsessed with Arni or idk maybe not. It could also be Arnold confessing to Lila and Lila saying she likes Arni, except for the whole intro to the situation reviewed on one ep. It's interesting he confessed to Hilda on his dream tho

(I didn't even understand myself what I meant but I'm gonna add that it could be Arnold falling in and out of love with Lila? And meaning he could fall in love with Helga if she showed her true nature? OR saying he already sort of likes her? Or likes what he thinkg he knows SHE IS??? LIKE I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M DOING THIS- I KNOW THEY ARE GONNA END UP TOGETHER I JUST WANT TO KNOW HE LIKED HER A LITTLE BACK TOO BACK THEN AND IT WASN'T THE RESULT OF HELGA SAVING HIS PARENTS AAAAA-)

Everyone chased Arnold except Hilda on Arnold's dream

Why was Arnold so happy that Helga was really Helga? If she was so nice in his dream (And so mean irl)? Was is because he really likes her as her is; or cause she doesn't like Arni like on his dream? LIKE WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? I MEAN I'M HAPPY HE'S HAPPY TO SEE THE REAL HELGA BUT DOES THAT MEAN HE LIKES HER MEAN OR WHAT I'M CONFUSED

Why was Arnold so happy to find out Lila only liked him? Cause she wasn't the "sl+ty" Lulu who did like him? MAybe he was just happy he wasn't on his nightmare anymore, still Hilda was no nightmare except till the end where she rejected him,,,, I love how he only adressed them like wth- the rest of your friends were the ones chasing you to your death and you don't wanna doble check that???

end

(HAHAHAJAHSJAHA)

[whatsaneggimcis]

Signs everything I thought I knew was wrong

I needed to dump my thoughts and feelings somewhere because I feel like im annoying my support group. I think my egg finally cracked Wednesday and immediately I had to start researching and buying gender affirming things. Anyways, here's my list of signs that I wish I had seen like a decade ago, please be kind I'm very new to opening up like this

Another Girl in elementary threatened me with makeup and cross dressing and I wanted it bad.

I think this one is such a major factor in why I feel like this has to be real. Its well before puberty and well before I knew transitioning was a thing. Just a natural thought for someone who’s the wrong gender

Multiple times pleading with god to just make me a girl

Still cis tho obv

Thinking if I held still for long enough in bed, some sort of magic would make me a girl and fix this wrong body of mine

I still remember the dreams where im a girl, i legit became proficient at lucid dreaming just for it.

Ah fuck the egg_irl memes are hitting too hard

My favorite game character is Bridget, listening back to the song is hitting really hard actually

Legit had an anxiety attack and took a day off work because my transfem friend said “careful, i said the same thing before i came out”

Wishing i had magic to turn myself into a girl

Playing female characters just to feel cute

Putting on leggings in highschool, then sleeping in them

Some female mannerisms

Kinda hating my poor skin but couldnt do anything about it since thats only for women am i right fellas

Mild euphoria when someone says good girl

Envisioning myself as the girl during fantasies

Jealousy over a womans body

Ive never seen any man sit cross legged at a table the way i do, idk why that one pops up but i’ve seen plenty of other girls do it

Desire to steal womans clothing to cross dress

At current moment I have no desire to bite my nails because I want them to grow out, even though I was a nail biter for 27 years

In pre school, tried to convince another girl to swap clothes with me

In pre school, loved pretending i was at a hair salon and the other girls in the school would give me a haircut. It gave me ASMR

Speaking of ASMR, I like exclusively listen to makeup, nail and hair roleplays

Feeling like i dont want to transition because I could be ugly

After realization, I dont have nearly as much of an appetite, maybe subconscious bodily sabotage in the form of overeating

Not seeing any future when I tried to plan my life better, before I ever considered the option of becoming trans

Feeling hurt when my dad made somewhat transphobic comments about my trans cousin

Wondering what my parents would do if i woke up one day as a woman and had to explain that to them

Genuine euphoria at the idea of trying on womens clothing, but thinking that i was weird and kinky

Playing with stuffed animals with my best childhood friend, a fellow girl

Hating my balls

I bet it feels good to cry, its probably cathartic

Hating body hair god i hate this so much, I’m just bad at shaving it and dont want to be covered in razor burns and have to explain to coworkers why I shaved my legs and arms

Hating my nose

Adopting a super masculine persona

Forcing myself to have a much deeper voice to not feel any of my true feelings

Actually seeing a future after considering becoming trans

Being hurt by transphobic comments at work before I realized my egg status

Was I sending what they said to my friend because i was hurt by it and wanted reassurance?

When i started drawing again, i had no desire to draw “cool badass epic shit” i just wanted to draw super cosy watercolor paintings.

God damn it i’ll say it, I fucking love pastels. Both the art medium and the color spectrum

Repression of my desire to dance and sing, or I guess express myself in any format due to internalized transphobia

“Mens fashion is so lame, girls have it so good. Im cis tho”

Pure depression my entire adult life

Wanting genuine friend connections with women in a more feminine way

Never caring about going out and buying clothes because none of them worked for me

Trying to force myself to not look at girls clothes because “thats only what weirdos do”

On this topic, how the fuck did i think this shit was normal… i wasnt watching women or anything, its not like i was being creepy in reality. I just wanted to see the womens clothes. Why is that such a bad thing for someone to want

Being jealous of my friend since he was openly wearing his girlfriend’s sweatshirt

Dude i stared longingly at a pink gamer girl chair, still cis tho

Speaking of gamers, being super jealous of C9 Sneaky that he could pass so well and was totally fine with showing that whole side of himself online. Same with Finnster.

I think i hate my voice, ever since realizing this about myself i cant help but hear my voice and think its not me

Being afraid to see a therapist because im not sure honestly

Fearing crying, but that might not be internalized transphobia and actually just be a side product of the vice grip on masculinity in society

Daydreaming about becoming a girl

General body dysmorphia

I want to cry but i cant, why cant I cry why