#considering how many of the contestants would be licensed characters

[duckapus]

The channel banner for the Tournament Arc would be a poster with the up-to-date tournament bracket and a "Super Meme Fighterzzz" logo. Except in between the penultimate episode and the finale, where the two sides of the bracket are replaced by stylized versions of the two finalists mid-clash with the logo between them.

[grimacingheron]

Written using a prompt from one of @remvictory 's incorrect SDV quotes posts.

"Y/N: Why does everyone want to kill Harvey?

Shane: Because, goddamnit, have you seen him? His neck looks so snappable."

I made Y/N the farmer character I use for all of these and might've gotten off-track-ish, but I had fun.

This was also nice to use as a way to express unpleasant thoughts that you might just need to think out to get 'em to go away. They aren't bad. You're just curious. Don't fear your thoughts. :)

Shane is sitting in the waiting area practically glaring holes in the side of Harvey's face. He got here close to an hour ago, now and has done nothing, but stare. Harvey greeted him when he came in and Shane said hello back before he sat down. He isn't here for any sort of service, as the doctor has already asked(multiple times).

He's simply here to stare. It's quiet in the clinic and he will make the most of it. Which leads him to now.

During this one-sided staring contest, Shane's been thinking. A dangerous thing, some would consider it. Most of his thoughts are centered around the doctor himself and his practice. His thought process was more normal an hour ago, questions like: where'd he get his license? What's the worst thing he's treated? The weirdest thing? Who comes in for treatment the most often?

That last question he's able to immediately answer himself. 'The farmer, clearly. Even the Adventurer's Guild doesn't come in with as many scrapes and ailments as Hero.'

But, from the topic of Hero, he started thinking about bones. Does Harvey know how to set a bone? Probably. How often does he see a broken bone? Because of Hero, more than he used to. Has he ever broken a bone? Hard to imagine.

How much force does it take to break a bone?

Could Shane break someone's bones?

Could he break Harvey's bones?

Harvey has a very snappable looking neck.

Shane startles in his seat, head checking his surroundings as if someone could've heard his thoughts. To his immediate relief, it's still just him and the doctor in the clinic. His brows pull together.

It is such an odd-creepy- thought. He didn't mean to think of something so...disturbing.

The sound of the clinic's door chime cuts through the undeclared silence. 'Think of the farmer and they shall appear.' Hero walks into the waiting room with a smile on their face and each hand expertly juggling damagable gifts.

"Harvey, dear!" The doctor rises so abruptly from where he was crouched behind that counter that Shane swears he heard his spine crack. 'Is that what his neck would sound li-'

Clearly, the attention gets directed to him when he shakes his head only to look up and hear Hero gasp.

"Shane my beloved! So, this is where you've been." One of the farmer's hands is now freed; the jar of pickles now less-safely in Harvey's flusteredly unsteady hands. Their other item is a warm plate of pepper poppers. He can already taste the spiciness of the home-grown peppers. Feel their crunch through the cling film.

How similar is this crunch to a bone-

He audibly groans. Hero quickly takes a seat next to him.

"Do you not like the peppers?" They sound apologetic. How awful. "I can get you something else."

Shane set the plate on his lap and waves them off, "No, no. These are fine. Great. They're great," his following sigh is also great, "I'm just having, uh, unpleasant thoughts?"

Hero angles toward him and as if Harvey can sense the tone shift, turns his back to them and hums to himself, distracted, "What kind of thoughts, dear?"

Now, he's worried them. That's so much worse.

"Nothing like what your thinking, honest!" He taps his fingers on the side of the plate. With a glance, he sees Harvey's still distracting himself to give them some privacy and he knows Hero's one of the only people, if not the only person he's willing to talk to about things as personal as this.

Shane decides to share, but only after a put-upon sigh, "Goddamnit, okay, look," he quickly, and discreetly, points at the oblivious doctor, "look at him. His neck just looks so snappable."

The look of relief on the farmer's face is so swiftly replaced with laughable confusion.

"What?" They spare the counter a look, Harvey's back still to them, but he's looking a bit up at a shelf and his neck is on perfect display framed between his stark white collar and his dark hair, "Why does everyone want to kill Harvey?" Hero whispers, almost to themself.

The laughable confusion's now on his face.

"What'd'you mean 'everyone?'"

Hero shuts their mouth and shakes their head, refusing to answer and break the confidence of whoever else confided in them.

"Hero, what do you mean?"

Elsewhere, Sebastian sneezes.

[camoooh]

Got tagged by @guywiththeroses (thank you ily) to answer some questions lets fuckin goooo 🤙

1. If you were to attend a costume party tonight, what or whom would you go as?

hmm. probably 80's boy george because hello, fun

2. What are your choice of toppings on a hamburger? And do you prefer gas or charcoal grilling?

whatever's going really, i like lots of sauces, gotta have lettuce and tomato on it too. i love cheese but it doesn't like me so probably not that, rip. and gas/charcoal like what's better for cooking with or for the taste? i wouldn't know the difference for either tbh

3. You are chosen to have lunch with the President. The condition is you only get to ask one question. What do you ask?

no question, just a staring contest. he who wins, takes the oval office. i'm your president now, i'm going to fix it all (i don't even live in the U.S)

4. It’s your first day of vacation, what are you doing?

making sure the car has petrol, worrying I've left something behind, figuring out the layout of the building, finding all the exits

5. What is your concession stand must-have at the movies?

Nothing, i used to smuggle in my own stuff

6. Which do you dislike most: pop-up ads or spam email?

spam emails die quietly in my inbox that i never check. pop ups count as jump scares and make me violent

7. What do you think Captain Hook’s name was before he had a hook for a hand?

Captain gurrrl what shampoo do you use, your hair is luscious

8. Rock, paper, or scissors?

rock

9. How long was it from ‘the first date’ until the proposal of marriage? How long until the wedding?

i have never been engaged/ married

10. Which is worse, being in a place that is too loud, or too quiet?

Both can be equally as awful depending on my mood

11. What is one quality that you really appreciate in a person?

noticing and remembering small details

12. At the good old general store, what particular kind of candy would you expect to be in the big jar at the counter?

this post is very american but growing up in england it was always a big ole jar of humbugs

13. What is the most distinguishing landmark in your city?

the volcano probably

14. Everyone hears discussions that they consider boring. What topic can put you to sleep quicker than any other?

Agreeing with Dane on this one, celebrity gossip switches off my brain so fast. i don't care

15. How many times did it take you to pass your drivers test?

in NZ there's three exams to get your license, your learners (like a written exam) which i passed first time, restricted license (can drive but within curfew and no passengers) i had to take 3 times, and full license (go for it, no restrictions) which i passed first time. i taught myself to drive so i'm not surprised it took a few attempts

16. If you had to have the same topping on your vanilla ice cream for the rest of your life, what topping would you choose?

not really a sweet/ ice cream person but i think strawberries would be good with it, or fruit in general

17. What food item would need to be removed from the market altogether in order for you to live a healthier, longer life?

tbh my diet isn't what's stopping me from living a long healthy life, its cigarettes

18. You are offered an envelope that you know contains $50. You are then told that you may either keep it or exchange it for another envelope that may contain $500 or may be empty. Do you keep the first envelope, or do you take your chances with the second?

eh fuck it take the chance, go for the $500

19. If you had to choose, which would you give up: TV, or internet?

i already don't watch tv, i just stream everything, so give up tv i guess

20. Who is your dream girl or boy from movies/tv?

tbh i don't really have one? i always just look at characters and go yeah wow they're cool i'd like to be buddies with them

21. Have you ever met a celebrity?

nope

22. What kind of lunch box did you have as a kid?

didn't eat lunch, the times i did have food it was just loose in my school bag lmao

23. What would you rather have, a nanny, a housekeeper, a cook, or a chauffeur?

a cook, i hate cooking with a passion, need someone to make sure i eat right

24. Would you rather be trapped in an elevator, or stuck in traffic?

traffic, easy, you've got music and a comfy seat, and lots of people in the same situation, its chill. stuck in a lift? i'm laying on the floor and accepting my fate. this is how i die

25. Lets say a brick fell on your foot, and your kid is standing right next to you, what is your ‘cleaned up’ swear word?

I will straight up swear in front of a child, they'll live. but sometimes its fun to blurt out random words that aren't even relevant, like "mozzarella!" or "traffic cone" or "Azerbaijan" (the last one i've used a lot recently it's just satisfying to say)

this was fun, i tag @echoanddust and whoever else wants to join 🤙

[sonicfanj]

It might surprise you to know that Knuckles actually started as a dinosaur due to popularity of Jurassic Park at the time brainstorming started on him. His bent tail is actually a carryover of that design. Also, he was never supposed to be a friend either.

Though I don’t have the links on hand to confirm what I remember (Sonic Retro has them all or you can ask @greenyvertekins who tracks all of this stuff), what led to Knuckles was one of many internal character contests in Sonic Team. Instead of another friend however they wanted an enemy or rival. For a while the rival idea was run with to the point that they had actually considered a character who was even cooler than Sonic that he would be envious of. A lot of these ideas were still present when Knuckles design was finalized, which was before he even was given a name no less attached to Sonic 3 in any clear fashion. By the time he was the envy of his relationship with Sonic was gone but later revived with him being envious of Sonic. Envy of Knuckles would actually end up on Espio, the main character of (Knuckles) Chaotix whose love of ancient civilizations made him envious of Knuckles living on Angel Island (wild how different the Chaotix are after their Heroes reboot, including actually being a group unlike in the game).

The most important thing to keep in mind however is that come the time of the Saturn, SEGA of Japan considered Sonic a shelved IP. So much so that he went from unpopular to completely unknown. SEGA of America tried to keep him alive, but as they did not control the license they were effectively powerless. It didn’t stop them from trying with an illegal attempt to make a Sonic game resulting in its assets turning into the game Bug. Of course the most popular example is Yuji Naka shutting down Sonic X-treme, which isn’t what actually happened. All he did was retrieve the Nights source code which was being used without his permission, with the Ristar team having already overwritten the original Sonic source code when they used it without permission to create Ristar.

So, if Sonic was shelved, how did we get to having Sonic Adventure at all? Remember that little game called Nights. It is the reason Sonic continued. As it was a Sonic Team it naturally had the Sonic Team logo, but Japanese players had no idea who the character was. In response to this curiosity, Sonic Jam was put together to introduce Japanese fans to Sonic. I’m not sure of the relationship between everything, but during this time the OVA was green-lit, providing the first instance of Knuckles being Sonic’s friend and not a rival/enemy, as well as the beginnings of Sonic Adventure coming together with Sonic Jam’s Sonic World being one of the earliest known prototypes for it.

I’ve never learned what the narrative inspiration was for Sonic Adventure’s story, though I do know that South America was an influence on the aesthetic of the game. However, I have always found it interesting how Chaos and the Master Emerald resemble the Dragon Egg legend Knuckles was familiar with that Eggman used to trick him in the Japanese story of Sonic 3 & Knuckles. But as you can see, Knuckles was not made to foreshadow the Echidna story. It was little more than something for fans to interpret as they would and otherwise explain why he was on Angel Island alone until they expanded on it in Sonic Adventure. I have no doubt that they had ideas back when they settled on Knuckles’ backstory, but at the least it’s not what he was created for.

Knuckles is a Protagonist in Sonic Adventure 2, but why?

So I’ve asked this before, but I’ve never understood Knuckles’ role in Sonic Adventure 2. He is set up as a protagonist (read we see his story and point of view) but his story doesn’t tie into the narrative at all or even serve a purpose for him as a character. Now why do I say that? Well, lets’s look at the story of the game and then Knuckles’ story.

Sonic Adventure 2′s story focuses on the Legacy of Gerald and how it affects the characters. Sonic is affected by his similarity to Shadow and eventually Eggman threatening the world. Tails and Amy are Sonic’s friends who care for him most and get involved with Tails in the long running understanding Eggman more as a scientist, and Amy revealing before anyone else that Shadow is not as ruthless as he appears due to him not breaking out of her hug, something he hasn’t experienced since before the Ark was raided. On the villain side you have Eggman trying to exploit his grandfather’s research and learning secrets about him he never knew which makes him reflect on himself. Shadow is obviously a character trying to fulfill his duty while facing his role both in the story and the conflict of his love for Maria and how that all ties into Gerald’s plan to destroy the world in revenge. Then you have Rouge who’s primary purpose is to tie the government conspiracy instigated by G.U.N together and question Shadow’s existence and purpose while also playing Eggman in case he get’s too dangerous. But what a bout Knuckles?

Well, first thing to take note of is he isn’t even mentioned above at all which should get your attention if you remember the game. His story begins with him breaking the Master Emerald to prevent Eggman from stealing and he soon finds himself competing with Rouge to collect the shards. By the end of the game once it’s restored he uses it’s power to stop the Ark’s final descent to Earth and saves the world. It’s all pretty awesome, except for the small detail that none of it happened.

Now I know that line will probably miff a number of Knuckles fans, especially since it obviously happened and we played it. But the thing is, Knuckles roles are all met with indifference in the main plot. The big revelation in his story that Rouge is good is defeated just by playing the villain side which you are supposed to do anyway which reveals that she is fundamentally good despite her moral failings when you discover she is there for the benefit of the world and stopping Eggman’s latest scheme while also uncovering for the president just how deep G.U.Ns corruption runs and the whole Gerald conspiracy. Her act of charity to Knuckles showing that she is good isn’t necessary and is completely superfluous in the Dark Story. Even her love of Gems is all ready covered in Security Hall making Knuckles’ interactions with her valueless and redundant. So what about Eggman and stealing the Master Emerald? Same thing, but worse. From Eggman’s point of view it never even happens. His entire story is digging up his grandfather’s legacy for his own ends and he never interacts with Knuckles until the final story. In other words, the starting point for Knuckles’ story never happens in Sonic Adventure 2′s plot. that’s absurd.

Obviously though Knuckles’ role in the finale still has to be addressed. If he wasn’t there to cancel out the power of the Chaos Emeralds then they couldn’t have stopped the planetary drop of the Ark. The problem there is that Knuckle’s action is immediately canceled and made a complete waste, nor is it a natural conclusion to his story in the game. He goes through everything he does, and does not reflect anywhere without being invalidated within the actual plot. if he was removed from the game the main narrative would not suffer for it in the least. And since his story does nothing for his character or any other either there is nothing lost for him in the end either.

So yes, as Knuckles has his own story in Sonic Adventure 2 which is about him and his POV he is a protagonist of Sonic Adventure 2. That is a fact and cannot be disputed. However, as the main plot has no bearing on his point of view and his POV has no bearing on the plot or other characters I have to ask a very simple question; why is Knuckles a protagonist of Sonic Adventure 2 if the his story and the Main story both do nothing for him and he does nothing for the other? I’ve asked it before and been told that supposedly Shiro Maekawa had always intended Knuckles to be one of the game’s protagonist, but his role as the game is presented provides no answers as to why. The fact that he can be removed and the only thing that needs to change is why the Bio Lizard warps outside of the Ark speaks volumes about how unnecessary he is. As a result I just can’t see it. Why is he one of Sonic Adventure 2′s protagonist? His story is useless to both him and the plot. If not for the end of Heroes further tying Rouge and Knuckles together he doesn’t even get new characters to interact with and expand his character. Of course as that was only really explored in Sonic X rather than the games even that does nothing for Knuckles in the end. He serves no purpose in Sonic Adventure 2 and really should have never been left in when the finalized story had no meaningful use or interaction with him. Yet, he is in the game, and he is one of the game’s protagonist and I am still baffled by it to this day.

[addictedtojmanga]

Best male characters in shoujo & josei manga - in my opinion, ofc

!!! Might contain spoilers about Love so Life, Faster than a Kiss, Last Game, Love Phantom, Special A, ReRe Hello, Kainushi wa Akuma, Sabaku no Harem, Max Lovely and Kimi ni Todoke. 

So, my criteria for this was:

1. is he toxic?

2. can he communicate properly with the female lead?

3. could I stand to talk with him for more than an hour?

That’s basically it. I used to love a bunch of male characters without realizing how douchey they actually were. Do I still love them? Yeah, but mostly because of nostalgia, I don’t actually consider them good men. 

I’m not saying the men in this list are perfect, cause c’mon we all know how manga characters - and people - are, but I think these are pretty great.  

Without further ado, here’s my - non ranked - fave MLs:

1. Matsunaga Seiji, Love so Life. 

This man is adorable, the best thing ever, I want him to myself. We don’t actually see a lot of romance in Love so Life, HOWEVER, Seiji is a responsible, caring, sweet guy. Once he gets his shit together he talks openly with the female lead about how he feels and how - because of their age difference - he’s willing to wait for her and that she doesn’t have to answer him right then and there or feel guilty if she doesn’t want to be with him in the future. 

Honestly, I really love him. He’s not a creepy older guy preying on a young girl, he respects her age and wants her to live her youth before settling down. Does he rely a bit too much on a 16yo? Yes, but I overlook it ‘cause I love him.

2. Ojiro Kazuma, Faster than a Kiss. 

Again, not a teacher/older man preying on a young girl. He’s her teacher and their relationship starts out with him wanting to protect/help his student out. If I’m not mistaken, he doesn’t even kiss her until she graduates, HOWEVER, he does make her wear sexy costumes, which is problematic. 

Overall, he’s sweet, helps her a lot, really loves her and wants to protect her (and her cute litlle brother). 

3. Yanagi Naoto, Last Game.

Yanagi starts out as a douchey rich kid who thinks he’s superior to everyone else until he’s beaten by the female lead and wants to defeat her. Overtime, he realizes he’s actually in love with her. He’s shy when it comes to her, and very patient. 

Did he follow her to middle school, high school and college? Yes. Would I find that creepy in real life? Absolutely. Can I excuse it because it’s a shoujo manga? Yes again. 

I think he’s a solid male lead for a shoujo manga, and I personally like him, but I definitely see issues with his behavior. 

4. Hase Kei, Love Phantom.

I want him. He’s older than the FL, so he often teases her, but I find it pretty adorable, especially when he’s the one feeling shy. Excluding chapter 01, I can’t remember any obvious flaws in his behavior. To sum up, I love him. 

5. Takishima Kei, Special A. 

Here is an OG male lead that I wouldn’t punch or kick.

Kei is handsome, rich, super smart and he doesn’t give a fuck about anything except the FL. She’s extremely competitive and he always goes along with her whims. He’s protective of her and a tad possessive, but it doesn’t really bother me. He’s pretty solid. 

6. Suou Minato, ReRe Hello.

Minato has his flaws as a person, but as a man/boyfriend, I really love him. I feel like he really cherishes the FL and usually respects her independence. If you haven’t read this manga, I definitely recommend you do!

7. Albrecht Ebel, Kainushi wa Akuma.

He’s super hot and sassy, I love it. Does he sort of sexually harass the FL? Yes, frequently. Does it bother me? Not really, to be honest. And I absolutely despise when male characters are forceful or rapey. I don’t know how to explain it, but at the same time that he teases her, he’s extremely sweet. I know this intro sounds bad, but I want to be upfront about it. Major spoilers ahead: in one of the final chapters, he’s feeling possessive and tries to have sex with her (she didn’t contest it), and when he comes to, she’s trembling and he stops, apologizes, says that there’s no meaning to it if she doesn’t want to and stays distant from her until she approaches him after realizing they love each other.

He is super sweet and she does love him, of course (it’s still a shoujo manga after all). I think everyone should give it a read (and you can delve into the wonderful world of flirting that is Kaji Eiri’s mangas). 

(Real quick, part of the reason I love her work so much is that the main couple flirts consistently throughout the manga, and one thing that bothers me a lot in shoujo manga is when the protagonists only get together in the last chapter.)

8. Sahara Taki, Max Lovely. 

Honestly, I just really love their relationship. This is a 20 year old manga but it’s really solid. I’ve re-read this a bunch of times and I absolutely love it. It’s not romance exclusively, there’s a pretty dark background story, but I really enjoy it. And Taki is a pretty baby, super sweet with the FL and usually very honesy with her.

9. Prince Kallum, Sabaku no Harem.

Would I be one of many wifes to a handsome and rich prince? No. Do I treat manga as reality? God, no. 

He’s very amusing, loves to tease the FL and is pretty sweet. I really enjoyed reading this, I think it’s a solid shoujo with a great male lead, and should definitely be on your list if you haven’t read it yet. 

10. Kazehaya Shouta, Kimi ni Todoke.

Is he my favorite male character? No. To be perfectly honest, he’s not even on my top 10. But is he a good man/boyfriend? Yes, and that’s why he’s on this list.

Like I said in the beginning of the post, there are toxic male characters that I still love despite them being shitty. 

Kazehaya is a popular type but he’s super nice and charismatic. He treats the FL which is usually dismissed by everyone with a lot of respect and care. I think he’s a bit too shy and indirect, which can sometimes jeopardize his relationship with her, but other than that, he’s a great guy. 

BONUS 01: not actually a boyfriend but I love him

Tsuruga Ren, Skip Beat. 

Now, is Ren perfect? No, he has a lot of flaws. A LOT. But I absolutely love him and I think he’s maturing. 

BONUS 02: I don’t personally love this type of character for myself, but I really like him 

Suoh Tamaki, Ouran High School Host Club. 

Like I said, he’s not my type, but I think he’s pretty cute and adorable and totally deserves to be on the list, so I made this spot just for him. 

BONUS 03: douchey guys I was blindly in love with as a teenager

1. Usui Takumi, Kaichou wa Maid-Sama. 

Do I hate Usui? No, not at all. I actually really like him. 

But he’s possessive, secretive, dismissive and forceful.

2. Irie Naoki, Itazura na Kiss. 

Naoki has always been - in my opinion - a dick. He pissed me of quite a bit even back then. But, since I always make sure to wear my shoujo anime/manga glasses to ignore problematic behavior when I’m reading manga, I don’t hate him.

! Please don’t get me wrong, even with my shoujo anime/manga glasses there are certain things that I can’t ignore and that really drive me crazy (ex. rape, racism, fat shaming, etc) 

It’s simply that I can understand that there’s a huge gap between manga and reality, and as long as I can recognize the problematic behaviors, I feel like I can enjoy them and respect the poetic license behind it. 

 Ok, that’s it, sorry for the long-ass post. 

[shewillreadyou]

Me before You: Chapter 2- For Real

As always. I hope that you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing.

A/N: This is a TRR AU. Liam is already married, but see’s Riley and wants his cake. If the readers are receptive this might turn into more than a mini series.

Disclaimers: Most characters are property of Pixelberry

Warnings: Language, adult content, mild sexual innuendo. 

Word Count: 2458

Catch up: Haven’t met you Yet

Prompts: @theworldofprompts​ 

“Name one thing you regret in life?”  

��Well, for starters, I married you.” will appear in BOLD.

Pairings: Drake & Riley

Song inspiration: For Real- Amel Larrieux

Be Kind: Hit the heart button, leave a comment or reblog. It makes a writer so so happy. 

“I now pronounce you man and wife. You may salute your bride.”

Savannah and her groom shared a modest kiss. 

“It is my pleasure to present to you for the very first time the Duke and Duchess of Ramsford. Bertrand and Savannah Beaumont of Cordonia.”

“Cordonia?” Riley whispered to herself.

“So I’m not crazy. Drake said he is from Cordonia. The Liam look-alike could really be King Liam of Cordonia. The matron of honor could actually be Queen Carsyn. This is insane.” 

Her thoughts raced as she tried to make connections. 

“There will be a cocktail hour in the barn,” an older woman announced.

The barn was decorated in a rustic theme, Tim McGraw’s, “I like it, I love it” played in the background and there were servers with appetizers everywhere. Quickly, lines formed for the open bars. Mack held on to Riley’s arm as they waited.

“So let me get this straight? The guy you met in New York, was Drake? Drake Walker? Like Savannah’s brother Drake? No fucking way. The world is not that small.”

“Yeah, apparently it is, he is the man I saw at the airport, the guy from the bar, the guy I’ve been texting and now he’s here.”

“Sounds like fate.”

“I don’t know if I believe in fate. More like dumb luck.”

“Miss Riley?” a server interrupts their conversation. 

“For you and your guest.”

He offers a whiskey sour and an old fashion, the signature drink to she and Mack.

“Compliments of Mr. Walker. My name is Caleb, I have been personally assigned to you for the duration of the evening. You don’t need to wait in lines. I can bring you whatever you need to eat or drink.”

“Wow, well thank you Caleb. That’s very thoughtful.” 

She tries to tip Caleb and he refuses. 

“No thank you Ma’am. Mr. Walker has already compensated me handsomely. Please let me know if there is anything else I can get for you.”

Later

The wedding party joins the guests in the barn before the bride and groom have their first dance. Riley watched from her assigned seat wondering who would end up seated next to her. The seat went empty for the first part of the afternoon. 

“That was a beautiful ceremony. You know, I have seen pictures and heard tons of stories about Drake from Savannah, but he has really grown up. He is a hottie.”

“He’s ok.”

“Wow, just ok? Huh? I’m wounded.” he says in a raspy voice. 

“Drake!”

Mack and Riley blush furiously.

“Raye. It’s good to see you again.”

“That’s one way of putting it,” she smirked.

“Sorry! Drake, this is Mackenzie, Mack this is Savannah’s brother Drake.”  

“Don’t listen to her. She was definitely pleasantly surprised,” Mack said as she extended her hand for Drake to kiss. 

Riley elbowed Mack and Drake laughed as he shook her hand. 

“Good thing I get the honor of keeping you company tonight. My seat was moved next to yours.”

He smiled and Riley’s heart melted just a little bit more. He leaned over to hug her and she immediately flashed back to their dance on the rooftop. 

After their first dance, all the guests were invited to the dance floor. “At Last” by Etta James started to play.

“May I have this dance? And please don’t tell me that your feet still hurt.”

She stood, unsure of what to do in the presence of royalty.

“Your Majesty, we have to stop meeting this way. Shouldn’t you be dancing with your Queen?”

Before he could answer, Drake slipped up behind Riley snaking his strong arm around her waist. Pulling her into his embrace.

“Beat it Li!”

“Miss me yet?” 

“Perfect timing. Small world. You didn’t say that your Mom and sister lived so close to me.”

“I didn’t think it was pertinent information at the time,” he said as he led her in a slow dance. Riley watched Queen Carsyn over Drakes shoulder, as she shot daggers at King Liam. 

“Is he always like that?”

“What?”

“Liam? Is he always so tactless?”

“I’m not at liberty to comment,” he chuckles.

“Question asked, question answered.”

“Enough about Liam. Have I mentioned how stunning you look?”

“No, but thanks for the compliment anyway.”

She smiled, getting lost in his eyes as they swayed to the music.  

After sitting and watching Drake and Riley dance and flirt for hours Mack was about ready to go.

“Ri, I’m about ready to head out.”

“Riley reluctantly said her goodbyes to Drake, not knowing when she’d see him again. 

After a short drive back to her place they arrived to see a red Jeep sitting idle in front of her door waiting. Riley looked at Mack and shrugged her shoulders. When she had said goodnight to her friend, she headed to the door. The window of the Jeep lowered, “Hey, could you tell me where to get something good to eat in this neighborhood?” 

“Drake! What-- how did you know where I lived?”

“Guestbook.”

“Well, that isn’t creepy at all.” 

“I’m hungry and thought you might be hungry too.” 

“So, where to?”

“I don’t know, I have only been here a few weeks.”

“I know a place.”

Drake gets out of the truck and walks around waving at Mack, who is still watching from her car. He opens the door for Riley and grabs her by the waist helping her into the truck.

“Really? Such a gentleman.”

He smiles as he heads back around. Mack lowers her window and says, “I took a picture of your license plates just in case she doesn’t make it back.”

“Noted.”

“Thank you. So where are we going?”

“Whataburger. I can’t get that in Cordonia.”

“What the what?”

“You’ll love it, promise and it’s on me. Seat belt.”

“Let me ask you a question?”

“Just one?”

“God no, I have a million questions.”

“Ok, I will try my best to answer them.”

She thinks of what she wants to ask first.

“What did you honestly think when you saw me today?”

“That I am not this lucky.”

A blush crept across her face as she awkwardly shifted in the seat.

“Why do you live in Cordonia if your Mom and Sister are here?”

“Work is there. Besides, I have never had a good reason to come back.”

“I see.”

 Her face betrayed her, she was feeling conflicted and defeated and it showed. They drove along the dark road quietly for a few minutes.

“So, uh, you must do important work in Cordonia for you to stay there instead of here with your family.”

“If you want to know what I do for a living Raye, just ask.”

“You told me not to and I respect your wishes.”

“Well, some would consider it important. My family won’t be here for long, Sav and my nephew are moving to Cordonia this week. I’m the lead for the King’s Guard.”

“You mean you protect Liam?”

“Yeah,” he says as he rubs the back of his neck.

Just then they pulled into the parking lot. The line in the drive thru was long so they headed inside. He held the door open for her and when they stood in front of the counter he stood directly behind her as they both looked up at the menu. He rubbed his hands up and down her arms when he noticed her shiver. 

“Cold?”

“Yeah, a little. Also, overwhelmed with this menu. Order for me?”

A mischievous grin crept across his face as he placed his suit coat around her shoulders. 

After an hour of probing conversation, many laughs, and eating a deliciously greasy burger, heavenly fries with as Drake called it “fancy fucking ketchup,” they headed back to her place. 

“Drake, I’m not ready for tonight to end,” she confessed.

“I know the feeling.”

“Come upstairs with me?”

“Riley Elizabeth Raye! What kind of guy do you think I am?”

“The kind who steals people’s personal information out of wedding guest books.” 

“Checkmate.”

“Besides, I have had these shoes on since this morning. My feet! Anyway, we can watch a movie and chat for a little while.”

“I have been told I give a mean foot massage.”

“Are you offering?”

He licks his lips and bites his lips. Her center twitched.

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what? Why are you looking at me like you want to climb in my lap?

Her cheeks flushed red.

“You wish.”

“Enough about that, let’s talk about our first real date.”

“Who said I wanted to date a guy with no real reason to come to Dallas?”

“Whoa, that was before.”

They headed up to her apartment. He stood so close to her in the elevator that she could feel his body heat. They had a staring contest that she lost. She definitely looked away first. It was like he was staring into her soul. The sexual tension was thick and she felt relieved when the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. 

“Long distance dating is not exactly something I want to pursue.”

“Understandable. I’m here now. Let me take you out tomorrow.”

“What would that look like?”

“Dallas Jazz fest is tomorrow.”

“And you just happened to know that off the top of your head?”

“I might have done some research on my phone when I learned that a certain lady whom I’d like to impress was within my grasp.”

She chortled, “you like jazz?”

“No, but if I get to spend time with you it can’t be that bad.”

“You’d do that for me?”

They step inside her place and he makes a face. 

“What is it?”

“Your place smells exactly like I expected, fruity.”

She invites Drake to sit as she kicks her shoes off. She moves around the counter and opens the fridge grabbing a couple bottles of water, a bottle of Glenmorangie, and a couple glasses. 

“Raye, this is the good stuff. It’s really expensive. Sure you’re sharing?”

“Completely, pour me one too? Be right back,” she says as she headed into her bedroom to change and freshen up.

When she returned, Drake cleared his throat at the sight of her barely there clothing change. 

They settled on the soft couch as Drake passed her the tumbler of whiskey he poured for her. She eyed the drink as he stared at her. 

“What are you looking at?”

“Your umm, outfit? Comfy?”

“Yes. Very. Should I drink this? I didn’t see you pour it.”

“Good grief, switch with me.” Drake says before raising his glass.

“Cheers, to the best reason I ever had to come back to the States.”

She bit her lip trying to contain her smile.

“Well then, after a toast like that you get to pick the movie.”

She later regretted being so generous. Drake chose FACE OFF. They started off good, he pulled her aching feet into his lap and rubbed them until she was sure she would orgasm. She pulled away crossing her legs in a twisted attempt to save her panties. 

She loved the movie but knew she couldn’t get through any of the scenes when they ran their hands down the others face to wordlessly say, I love you. So as much as she tried she sat with tears running down her face for much of the movie. The first time she cried Drake pretended to ignore it. She wiped her face on her. The next time she cried he looked at her with a raised eyebrow and the final time he pulled her into his arms and wiped her tears.

“You definitely get to pick a movie that won’t make you cry next time.”

“Next time? You really want to go out with me, huh?”

“I thought that was clear by now.”

  “Drake, can I be honest?”

“I’d prefer it.”

“I have never dated a white guy before.”

He feigned shock. Then laughed. 

“We have that in common because I haven't either. Is that all?”

“No, I didn’t expect to like you this much.”

“Have you dated a black woman before?”

“No.”

“Are you ready for family and friends to turn their backs on you? For strangers to shoot us dirty looks in public? For all of the things that come along with dating me?”

“I guess I never really thought about it. But I’d like to think that it would be a small price to pay to be with you.”

 They chatted until they both fell asleep. The sunrise plucked him from his slumber. She had fallen asleep in his arms. He watched her for a few moments fighting the urge to kiss her. He untangled himself from her and used her restroom. When he returned, she was awake. 

“I thought you finally came to your senses and left.”

“I don’t scare easily. I’m headed back to the ranch. I’ll pick you up around 6pm.”

She stood and they shared a long embrace as she secretly sniffed him trying to memorize his smell before she let him out.

Back at the ranch

“You stayed out all night. Did you get some trim?”

“No.”

Figures. You wouldn’t know what to do with all that ass anyway.

“And you do?” Carsyn interjects.

“Carsyn, I didn’t realize you were back from your morning run.”

“I knew that you wanted to fuck her. I saw the way you were looking at her at the wedding.”

Drake stands, “This seems like a personal conversation. Call me later Li.”

Liam shakes his head and turns to his wife. 

“You are always making a big deal out of nothing. I have given you everything. You knew who I was before you married Me. You are the queen. Why are you so insecure?”

Tears filled her eyes. 

“Name one thing you regret in life?”  “Well, for starters, I married you.”

Liam stormed out of the room to find Drake in the hall on the phone with Riley. When Drake sees Liam he ends the call.

“Drake Walker. Your nose is open. I know you think you like her but, do you really want to start seeing a black woman? They can be a lot.”

“Don’t be an ass Li, any woman can be a lot. But it’s different with her. She is so chill. Like it’s easy with her.” 

“If it’s so easy, why didn’t you close?”

“I said that it’s easy to be with her. Not that she was easy you, prick.”

“Just be careful Drake. You know what they say… Once you go black…”

“Li! For fucks sake.”

“I’m just saying. I’m going out tonight so if you need a trial run Carsyn will be here alone.”

“Did you just give me permission to fuck your wife?”

“Sure, everyone knows I’m not.”

“Hard pass.”

@txemrn​​​ @pixie88​​​ @secretaryunpaid​​​@khoicesbyk​​​ @blackkingliamstan​​​ @mom2000aggie​​​ @shannonwrote​​​ @hopelessromanticmonie​​​ @fanjessfic​​​ @rideordiechronicles​​​ @lucy-268​​​ @dcbbw​​​ @darley1101​​​ @maurine07​​​​ @sfb123​​​ @bbrandy2002​​​ @kingliam2019​​​ @schnitzelbutterfingers​​​ @lem-20​​​ @choicesficwriterscreations​​​​ @theworldofprompts​​ @no-one-u-know​​

TRR: @twinkleallnight​​​  @bebepac​​​ @mainstreetreader​​​ @romereadingshop​​​ @romewritingshop​​​ @lem-20​​​ @texaskitten30​​

[onebizarrekai]

Meme Waker: That Final Thing

okay aight here we go here’s the big idea compilation you’ve all been waiting for or something like that

since I’ve finally accepted meme waker’s inevitable fate, I’ll share what I’ve had laying around about it. prepare yourself for a wild ride.

first of all, what existed of the planned character key:

Nightmare = Link Dream = Aryll Cross = Tetra Ink = The Entire Pirate Crew Granny Gertrude = Grandma Horror = Quill Killer = Medli Color = Komali Dust = Makar XGaster = Tingle (yes, you read that right) Fresh = Fado (?) Geno = Laruto Blueberry = Niko Error = Ganondorf Giant Flying Chicken = Helmaroc King Core Frisk = The King XChara = Zelda

So XChara was going to fill the role of Zelda–basically, what was going to happen was that when Cross and Nightmare reached sunken Hyrule, which was replaced by the Omega Timeline, they encountered Core Frisk and with their magical Core Frisk powers that apparently exist, separated XChara from Cross’s body. Because Error was hunting him down for whatever villainous reasons (I dunno, maybe he wanted to find Overwrite or something), XChara was going to spend the near remainder of the comic hiding in the Omega Timeline from Error. It was a pretty neat reference to the fact that Error doesn’t know where the OT is.

Unsurprisingly, considering when I was working on this, Nightmare and Cross may have eventually started dating. They were going to kiss during a fight that involved them accidentally rolling down a hill and then likely spend the remainder of the comic referring to each other as boyfriends, with no further indication of romance between them. I never really mentally decided whether I was actually going to incorporate this or not.

In moments where someone needed to present a musical instrument, Cross was going to play a keytar.

There is a very high chance that the entire comic was going to end up being an elaborate prank set up by Ink and Error.

After being rescued from the Forsaken Fortress, Dream was going to get crossbows and… I dunno, maybe be useful with them sometimes. One consideration was that he was going to complain about being stuck in a glorified retirement home and request joining the party.

Nightmare was going to have a fake ID with the name “Nathaniel Meyer” on it.

When Nightmare eventually pulled up the Gaster Sword, he was basically going to do a magical girl transformation and get a new outfit. I was considering holding a contest where people would submit new designs for Nightmare before I realized that I may have wanted to do it myself. Meanwhile, Cross’s design change at the same time was going to pertain to the fact that he had such a hard time with his uniform that he just wanted to start wearing normal clothes.

When XChara was separated from Cross, it would indicate that Cross can’t use the hack knife anymore, so I had to think of a new weapon for him. I considered giving him arm mounts with knives in them for no reason other than being extra, but I was probably just going to end up going with a regular sword.

Nightmare and Cross were going to be mistaken for missionaries at some point due to Nightmare introducing Cross as his ‘companion’.

Nightmare’s fake ID is actually a driver’s license. Cross questions how he could get one when he’s only fifteen, and Nightmare responds with “what can I say? I live in the country.”

The Giant Flying Chicken was going to evolve into the Cyborg Giant Flying Chicken before Nightmare and Cross fought it. It was already a robot, but someone decided it would be fun to make it look more robotic for some reason. Maybe too many people tried to eat it.

Because Blueberry was going to replace Niko, that meant there was going to be a form of challenge that he would present to Nightmare and/or Cross. They were probably just going to play Dance Dance Revolution.

The dress that Granny Gertrude gave Nightmare was actually going to be infused with magical powers. Either Nightmare could only access the power of the Triforce when he’s wearing the dress, or it was going to be a piece of equipment that turned his sword into a fire sword.

Nightmare was going to come back to the Village of Old People to see that his grandmother had conquered it with capitalism.

Dragon Roost Cavern was going to be replaced with a Pokemon gym.

When Nightmare supposedly kicked Error’s ass at the end of the story, he was going to say something along the lines of “Because fuck you!” and it would be the first and only f-bomb in the whole comic. Nightmare would proceed to say that it was the first time he’d ever said fuck and that he felt dirty.

The Triforce of Courage was just going to be called the Triforce of Porridge for exactly zero reason.

Some incarnation of Buffmare was going to exist in the comic, but only in a sequence taking place in Nightmare’s imagination.

When Cross realized his backpack was missing, it was because I realized his backpack was missing. I forgot to draw it. I decided that the backpack actually fused with him to create a Zelda-style magic pocket.

Nightmare was going to try to control a seagull with the command melody, but he was accidentally going to start controlling Cross instead and make him run into a tree.

The Tree Spirit was going to hold official interviews for placeholder guardians in Dream and Nightmare’s absence. These placeholder guardians were going to be Neil, the overenthusiastic French furry, and Ccino, the local emo kid who is absolutely done with everyone’s bullshit, and exclusively because they were the only ones who applied for the job. Neil was going to have an ulterior motive of becoming Gaston’s successor.

Neil and Ccino were eventually going to ‘get together’, if you can even call it that, and for no other reason than shitpost reasons.

Nightmare may have had a showdown with the Giant Flying Chicken while riding the Great Charizard from Dragon Roost.

Another possible concept for whole story was that it was a bad self insert fic written by a younger version of Nightmare, but it’s really unlikely that I would’ve gone through with that.

Nightmare and Cross may have needed to go on a fetch quest to find Ink’s brush in the ocean because they accidentally lost it, but honestly that would’ve served nothing for the progression of the story. Because XGaster put a tracker on Ink’s brush, they were going to have to enlist his help.

and that about wraps up my notes, now let me throw what I had sitting around of a script draft–reading this was a trip because I forgot that literally 60% of it existed:

(inside the mountain)

Cross: holy shoe, EVERYONE has wings? how is this a thing??

Cross: I’m frickin jealous

Chief: Oh. You must be. Those guys.

Horror: yeah man, I enlisted their help to capture the Chicken Terror, but then they were all like yo, it’s a robot!


Chief: horror robot or not I told you that we weren’t going to capture the chicken terror for food because we’re not cannibals we don’t eat birds

Horror: but

Horror: we’re hardly even birds!

Chief: you know your job Horror. now get back to work. your actual work.

Horror: But… being the mailman sucks!


Chief: Do I need to confiscate your axe again?


Horror: OKAY FINE. I’M GOING. (flies away in a huff)

Chief: AND DO YOUR GODFORSAKEN LAUNDRY!

Chief: I apologize for that… so, how can I help you two today?


Nightmare: You guys have like, some pearl thing or something? We need to like, collect three of them in order to… save the multiverse… or something like that.

(Camera dramatically darkens.)

Chief: It’s just as the prophecy foretold…

Nightmare: oh god what

Chief: You see, young whippersnappers… legend tells of a great hero that would rise up and save a bunch of people in times of desperation that they don’t even realize are desperate. the great hero would travel far and wide in search of the Pearls of Shiny to finally retrieve a great weapon that he would use to strike down the evil that few knew existed. also the hero would have a sidekick wearing stupid clothes.

Cross: EXCUSE ME

Chief: THAT’S JUST WHAT THE PROPHECY SAID

Nightmare: okay, y’know, I’m just gonna roll with it. where can I get the pearl?

Chief: Well… that’s where the hard part comes in. You see, the pearl belongs to my son… but he’s been acting like an edgy teenager lately.

Nightmare: Great…

Cross: Is there a reason he’s being edgy? Maybe there’s something we can do to appease his hormones.

Cross: Free food works like a charm for me.

Chief: No, it’s more complicated than that. When one of our people becomes of age, they climb to the top of Charizard Island to receive a scale from the Great Charizard that will allow them to grow wings.

Nightmare: the… great charizard.

Chief: But lately, the Great Charizard has been throwing inexplicable temper tantrums. No one can get close to him anymore. And with my son being of age, he’s decently pissed off about this.

Chief: We’re thinking that the Great Charizard is displeased about something, and it is also causing our shortage of food.

Nightmare: Wait, you worship something named after a Pokemon?


Chief: Anyway, perhaps you two will be able to talk some sense into my son. Maybe he just wants to talk to someone his age that isn’t Horror or Killer.

Nightmare: What kind of names are those?


Chief: There’s a letter that I wanted my son to read, and I’ve given it to Killer to hold onto. You can go get it from him upstairs in the first room near the stairs, just tell him I sent you. He’s the little guy in the short shorts, you’ll probably recognize him when you see him.

Nightmare: Can’t you just call him here?


Chief: No, it is of upmost importance that you experience a basic fetch quest in order to become a great hero, because those fetch quests will become needlessly complicated before you even realize it.

Nightmare: ?????

Nightmare: I can’t even tell if you’re joking or not–

Cross: dude let’s just go get the letter

(scene transition)

(Killer dramatically turns around and it zooms in and says his name SSB style)

Nightmare: Wait, why do you get a dramatic introduction?


Killer: Dayum. New faces.

Nightmare: Why is everyone ignoring my questions??

Killer: (needlessly sensual voice) So, what brings you here? (walking closer)


Nightmare: (backs into wall) NO BUENO

Cross: You have a letter or something?


Killer: Oh. Yeah. Chief gave it to me for some reason. Yo, catch.

(He chucks it like a ninja star. Cross catches it between his hands in front of his face.)


Killer: Ey! You actually caught it!


Cross: I’m a trained ninja.

Killer: So like, who are you guys?

Cross: I’m Cross. He’s Larry.

Nightmare: NIGHTMARE. MY NAME IS NIGHTMARE.

Killer: Aw man, I know the feel of having a really lame name and wanting one that’s cooler.

Nightmare: No. Like. My name is actually Nightmare. My senile grandma called me Larry earlier today and this loser picked up on it.

Killer: There’s no need to lie. I understand.

Nightmare: I’M NOT LYING!

Killer: anyway make sure you get that letter to Color there’s something I have to do–

(Killer zips out the door behind them.)


Cross: what even the frick?


Nightmare: that guy freaks me the frick out.

Nightmare: literally. I felt like he was coming onto me.

Cross: you’re imagining things.

(SCENE TRANSITION)
 Cross: all right Nightmare I literally do not trust your ability to communicate with another person in a way that will make them feel inclined to give us something so just let me handle this okay

Cross: okay better yet wait outside the room

(Nightmare makes a less than amused face.)


Cross: it’s for the greater good

(Cross walks into the room.)

Cross: hi my name is Cross and

Color: LEAVE

(Cross immediately exits the room.)

Cross: this is a lost causeNightmare: what

Cross: go make him bleed with your words

Nightmare: dude isn’t this the part where we give him the frickin letter

Cross: (pauses) :o

Cross: OH RIGHT

(Cross takes the letter and goes back into the room, leaving the door open)

Cross: oh yeah this letter is for you it’s from your dad or something

Color: Oh, wow. Can’t even be bothered to talk to me in person.

Color: Give me that thing.

(Color stares at the letter. It’s actually a letter from Killer filled with really bad pickup lines and other really creepy compliments.)

Color: What the hell, you said this was from my dad!

Cross: We thought it was–??

(Killer teleports in behind them, scaring the shit out of Nightmare)


Killer: Suuuup~

Color: Killer I swear to god.

Killer: Here’s the actual letter, though you might not be happy with it.

(He flings it at Color and it lands in front of him. He reads it over, rolls his eyes and throws it in the trash.)

Cross: So uh… I don’t know what the letter says but apparently we’re prophesied heroes collecting a bunch of pearls to save the multiverse and the pearl you have is–


Color: Can everyone just get out of my room already?

(everyone just leaves)

Nightmare: What even was the point of that stupid fetch quest?

Killer: Oh yeah, can you guys help me with something? Just a smalllll favor. And I can’t ask anyone else because I’m not supposed to do it.

Killer: I need some strong, reliable people…

Nightmare: Don’t touch me.

Killer: It’s just a small favor! And I mean actually small, it’ll take like two minutes.

Nightmare: I have doubts about this.

Killer: Great! Meet me out back by the spring.

Nightmare: Wait which side is the back–

(Killer is gone)

Nightmare: Cross which side is the back.

Cross: I don’t know??

(after spending twenty minutes going through the various exits trying to figure out how to get there)

Killer: What the hell took you so long.

Nightmare: Directions would’ve been helpful. There wasn’t even a freaking map anywhere in there!

Killer: The hollow is like the size of a middle class house! How difficult could it be to find out where to go?!

Nightmare: IT’S A DOME THERE IS NO BACK

Cross: OKAY, what matters is that we’re here, what the heck do we do now.

Killer: Okay, okay. (steps backwards) Look, if you look around here, it’s all a dried up spring. The Great Charizard was throwing a tantrum, a boulder fell down and it coincidentally plugged up the spring for the third time this week, which is literally our main source of fresh water. I’m honestly getting sick of this so I’m going to climb the mountain and see what’s going on because everyone else is too scared to do it.

Nightmare: God. You’re not gonna make us go with you, are you?


Killer: Oh, no way. I just need you to throw me up that cliff over there so I can get into the cavern that leads up the mountain.

Nightmare: Can’t you fly?

Killer: Not thirty feet straight up. Do these noodle arms look like they can manage that?


Nightmare: Whatever. But quick question. How the hell does one throw a person.

Killer: I weigh like fifty pounds. It shouldn’t be that hard. Also, if you’ve noticed, the wind is rapidly changing directions, so you’ll probably have the best effect throwing me when the wind is blowing that way.

Nightmare: Mhmm. Sure. Let’s just get this over with.

(Nightmare crouches down and Killer fuckin walks onto his shoulders)

Nightmare: Hey! Watch it!

(some way or another he throws Killer and Killer barely makes it to the cliff, face planting into the ground)

Nightmare: Well I guess that worked.

Killer: THAT WAS TERRIBLE!

Nightmare: YOU’RE WELCOME! COULD’VE JUST USED A DAMN LADDER!

Killer: NOBODY OWNS A LADDER HERE BECAUSE EVERYONE CAN FLY!

Nightmare: Then how the frick do people get up this cliff?!

Killer: THERE’S NORMALLY A BRIDGE BUT IT BROKE AND PROBLEMS LIKE THESE ARE PRECISELY WHY I’M CLIMBING THE MOUNTAIN TO BEGIN WITH! ALSO I’M LEAVING BYE. (turns and leaves)

(cricket cricket)

Cross: Nightmare we should probably follow him.

Nightmare: No.

Cross: What else do we have to do. We solve their problem, Color can get his wings and then he stops being emo and gives us the pearl out of the goodness of his heart.

Nightmare: I’m not risking my life for this! If that guy is willing to do it himself I’m going to let him do it!

Cross: Dude, look at that guy. He looks about at capable fixing whatever the problem is as Ink is at providing emotional support. If this happens to be anything like a video game, we’re the only ones capable of solving anything. Besides, what else are we supposed to do? Hang around and wait for something to happen?

Nightmare: All right, fine. But how are we supposed to do something? It’s not like we can climb up a thirty foot cliff.

Cross: No, but we can swim, right?Nightmare: What?

(Cross draws a line around the rock covering the spring. It dematerializes into red squares and water starts to spew out of the spring. They both run back towards the side and climb up the cliff they came from)

Nightmare: Dude, what the hell was that?

Cross: I can draw lines around things with my sword and they do that and go away.

Nightmare: … do they go somewhere?


Cross: I dunno.

(Meanwhile in Xtale, a boulder slams into the floor and almost crushes Fresh because of course he’s there)

(The spring fills up)


Nightmare: You know I’m starting to have second thoughts about this swimming thing seeing as how I’ve never actually–(Cross kicks him into the water)


(LATER)


Nightmare: YOU ASSHOLE I ALMOST DROWNED

Cross: You’re exaggerating.

Random Dude: STOP RIGHT THERE!


Nightmare: who.

Random Dude: YOU AREN’T GOIN ONE STEP PAST THIS POINT! YOU’RE LIGHT YEARS FROM FACING BROCK!

(nightmare squints)

(comic suddenly goes into a battle sequence)

Nightmare: whoa whoa what the hell is happening

Cross: oh my god it’s pokemon NIGHTMARE IT’S POKEMON

Nightmare: I DON’T HAVE ANY POKEMON CROSS THREATEN HIM

(Random Dude sent out MEWTWO)

Cross: DEAR GOD

Cross: LISTEN THERE’S A HUGE MISUNDERSTANDING WE’RE NOT TRAINERS WE DON’T HAVE POKEMON

Random Dude: tHEN WHY ARE YOU IN A POKEMON GYM HUH

Cross: Uh… touring?

Random Dude: OH

Random Dude: I SEE

(The Random Dude returns his Mewtwo.)

Random Dude: THERE HAS BEEN AN UNFORTUNATE MISUNDERSTANDING

Cross: Say uh, you didn’t happen to see a scrawny dude with wings pass through here, did you?

Random Dude: Oh yeah, he went into the next room and took the elevator to the top.

(silence)


Nightmare: Why are there always elevators.

(two seconds later, they reach the elevator and there’s a dude standing in front of it)


Nightmare: um excuse me we need to use the elevator

Dude: oh man I can’t find my glasses anywhere what do I do

Nightmare: excuse me I said move

Dude: oh man I can’t find my glasses anywhere what do I do

Nightmare: HELLO

Dude: oh man I can’t find my glasses anywhere what do I do

Nightmare: MOVE ASSHOLE

Cross: I think it’s a preprogrammed NPC.

Nightmare: UAGGGGHHHHH

(Nightmare throws himself into the person, but he slams into the STEEL WALL OF NPC)

Nightmare: CROSS TELEPORT HIM AWAY

Cross: wait are you serious what if that freakin kills him I don’t know where these things go

Nightmare: YOU SAID IT YOURSELF HE’S AN NPC

(Cross shrugs. He draws a line around the NPC and the NPC disappears)

(one elevator ride later)

Nightmare: (chokes) oh god

Nightmare: the altitude

Cross: nightmare this island is still lower than ink’s house.

Nightmare: PSYCHOLOGICAL ALTITUDE

(fwip)

Cross: Oh look, it’s that guy from earlier.

Nightmare: Got captured somehow. Why am I not surprised?

Killer: YOU KNOW WHAT SCREW YOU GUYS

(A really buff guy abruptly slams into the ground)

Buff Guy: FEAR MY WRATH, FOR I AM BROCK! LEADER OF ALL THINGS ROCK HARD

Nightmare: Look man, we really don’t have time for this, just let the shota hoe go, we’re just checking up on the huge-ass Charizard up there.

Killer: excuse me

Brock: I AM THE LOYAL GUARDIAN OF THE GREAT CHARIZARD! You can only pass if you defeat me!


Cross: what the hell is even happening anymore

(Loud gym battle music as the gate at the entrance of the clearing slams shut)

Nightmare: LOOK WE’VE BEEN OVER THIS WE DON’T HAVE ANY POKEMON

(Brock war cries as he sends out a very anime geodude)

Nightmare: can someone please tell me I’m hallucinating all of this

Brock: WELL, IF YOU DON’T HAVE POKEMON, YOU’LL HAVE TO USE A RENTAL

Cross: What? But rental pokemon always suck.

Brock: YOU MUST PROVE YOUR WORTH SOMEHOW! AND BECAUSE YOU’RE SMALL CHILDREN YOU OBVIOUSLY CAN’T PROVE IT THROUGH SUMO WRESTLING.

Nightmare: I’m fifteen!

Cross: Nightmare I think you’re missing the point.

Killer: Good god, just let them through and let me out of here, they’re the heroes of prophecy.

Brock: PROPHECY

Brock: GOODNESS ME I APOLOGIZE FOR THAT

(Brock returns his geodude)

Brock: YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID SOMETHING

Nightmare: That would have worked?

Brock: BUT! IF YOU WANT TO FREE THIS TINY FELLOW HERE, YOU MUST COMPLETE A DIFFERENT CHALLENGE! FOR YOU SEE, HE TRIED TO PASS THROUGH HERE WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION!


(Killer rolls his eyes. Nightmare squints, literally pulling a notebook out of his shirt. He writes something in it, walking up to Brock and holding it up. It says “Let the guy out of jail you dick”)

Brock: AHA

Brock: WELL

Brock: I CAN’T ARGUE WITH THAT

(He stomps his foot on the ground and the bars in front of Killer go up)

Brock: DON’T BE CAUSING TROUBLE NOW KIDS


(He ascends back into the sky)


Cross: I’m not even going to ask. That entire conversation felt like a drug trip.

(Killer dramatically throws himself onto Nightmare)


Killer: I knew you would come around, my knight in–

Nightmare: Why did I assume that you had become any less creepy in the last ten minutes. Why did I even do that?


Killer: Because your heart told you to.

Nightmare: Dear god stop touching me or I will literally pick you up and slam you into the floor.

Killer: Feisty. Anyway, I figured out why the Great Charizard is freaking out all the time. His tail is hanging down into the room below him and something is chewing on it like all the time.

Cross: What? Then why doesn’t it just, I dunno, pull its freaking tail out of the room like a reasonable creature? Or maybe take care of the problem on its own?

Killer: The Great Charizard is like a five year-old. It’s self aware, but it expects all of its problems to be solved by everyone else and throws tantrums when that doesn’t happen.

Nightmare: Well that’s stupid. Why does everyone act like it’s some holy being then?

Killer: Because it’s a massive, terrifying dragon that can breathe fire?

ok unfortunately this is where the script ends but I hope you enjoyed that

oh yeah, and some extremely old art that I found:

as well as a brief consideration to make the characters human before deciding that I just didn’t want to work on the comic anymore.

basically you will notice that most of this doesn’t have a solid outline, and you’d be right: I never actually planned it that meticulously. I mostly just winged it and threw stuff in over the course of time and never even really planned anything close to a definitive ending beyond “maybe it was a prank”. sorry if this is like… anticlimactic, but it’s all I could find!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #457

“blue are the words i say and what i think  /  blue are the feelings that live inside of me”

Do you buy your lingerie at Victoria’s Secret? No. That shit is so overpriced and not for my size group. Would you ever use an online dating service? I never would again. Are you good at multitasking? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Have you ever eaten Frosted Mini Wheats? Ugh, those are so gross. What does your bikini look like? You think THIS bitch wears a bikini??????????????????????? Does age really matter in a relationship? To an extent, yes. How much does the last person you kissed mean to you? I honestly don't even know if I'd be here without her. Almost like magic, Sara popped back into my life right after I returned home from the hospital following my suicide attempt. She helped make recovery possible as a solid source of support. Do you use lotion? Not NEARLY enough. My skin is so dry; I need to. Do you believe in teenage love? I experienced it deeply and thoroughly, so yes. Have you ever sat on the roof of your house? No. Do you like Sublime? I like that one popular one of theirs. "Santaria" or whatever it's called? What’s your favorite movie genre? Paranormal horror, especially the "found footage" type. It's creepy to imagine it being actually real. Is there a celebrity that you’d be willing to have a one night stand with? If he was single? I know in my gut I would lmaooooo Do you want to live in your current town the rest of your life? OH MY GOD PLEASE NO If you found out today your best friend was gay what would you do? She's demisexual, so. She can like anybody. If you could get a pet for free today-what kind/what name? A tegu, because it wouldn't need an enclosure that I don't have. I'd let it free roam. God, I can only imagine Roman's reaction. How many people have you slept with? If you mean what I think you do by "slept," one. Do you ever wish you had a family business to become a part of? Not really. What’s the most gruesome way you could come up with to kill someone? Hunny, have you seen my dark RP????? The world best be glad I'm a pacifist lmfao Do you think anyone deserves to die that way? I don't believe in torture, so no. If you had to fight for survival, what would your weapon of choice be? A gun, I guess? I'd want something with range and that's quick. I wanted to say a bow and arrow, but preparing another arrow after shooting once could really cost you your life. Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans? I don't wear jeans anymore. Do you have a large dog? We don't have a dog, period. If not, are you afraid of them? No, I love big 'ole puppos!!!!! I just don't wanna own a dog myself. Are you good at playing darts? Holy fuck no, I have NO hand-eye coordination. I once stabbed the guy at a balloon popping booth thing with a dart in the arm, if that tells you anything, ooooooooooof. Do you like breaded chicken sandwiches? YESSSSSSSSS omg Do your parents know that/if you smoke? They know that I don’t. Have you ever been under a blacklight? Omg so in elementary school, we did this thing once where we all washed our hands as best we could and then put them under some sort of light (maybe a blacklight, idk???) to see JUST how resilient germs are. You gotta scrub the fuck out ya hands, people. How many pounds do you want to lose? I'd rather not share a number, but a lot. What’s your favorite natural phenomenon? The Northern Lights. Do you snore? Very surprisingly for someone with sleep apnea like mine, I actually don't. How many people do you know with the same first name as you? Off the very top of my head, one, but it's spelled differently. I KNOW I know of a shitload more Brittanys, though. Is it possible you could be pregnant? Well, I haven't been intimate with a man in years and just finished my period, so like- Could you go a day without texting? I go most days without texting. Do you have a step-parent? My dad is remarried, so yes. If so, do you get along with them? She's EXTREMELY Christian, so her beliefs wildly disagree with mine, but I keep my mouth shut a lot just to keep the peace. She IS a very sweet woman, nevertheless, and am glad she and my dad are so happy together. Does your current/last job require that you wear a uniform? My last job (which lasted not even two hours lol) did. When will your driver’s license expire? My permit has been expired for like... two years. Do you live in an apartment? No. If the last person you kissed proposed to you what would you say? That's too wild a concept to even imagine. I'd probably ask if she was okay lmao. Would you ever get back with one of your exes? Weeeelp, I want to get back together with Girt. Pretty badly. Write a foreign word, and what it means: "Schadenfreude" is a German term that essentially means secondhand embarrassment, but it doesn't have a perfect translation. Is there an ex you think about everyday? Inevitably. That's PTSD, my friends. Who is the last person that you said I love you to, besides family members? Sara. What's the worst thing you have ever said to anyone? Something along the lines of "no one could ever love you like I do." It boils my blood just typing that; I considered even deleting this question. That quote right there is fucking manipulation, even IF I thoroughly believed it. Who was the last person to comment one of your pictures? I don't feel like looking. Do you tend to go for older or younger when looking for someone to date? It's weird, I'm into slightly older-than-me guys, but probably girls who are barely a bit younger than me. Have you ever been used? I don't think so. Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head? Like I've said in plenty of surveys: Jason is probably a permanent fixture. But also as of the past two days, Girt's been living up there. I went from "hmmm I just don't know how I feel" to "FUCK I want to talk to him about how stupidly into him I am right this fucking INSTANT" pretty goddamn fast. It kinda scares me just because of how extreme my feelings are. Again. That's only ever gotten me hurt. Buuuut let's not get into that. Have you ever got caught cheating on a test? No, because I've never tried to. Will your next kiss be a mistake? I hope it won't be. But it's not like I know the future. Have you ever worn an oxygen mask? Actually yes, when I was young and thought I was having an asthma attack or something. Mom had one for her own asthma. Then I obviously wore one for surgery. What song do you want to be played at your funeral? "Paradise" by Coldplay is absolutely #1. How many swear words are in the song you’re listening to? I'm not listening to music; I'm back to watching Gab play Sekiro. What color was the last swimsuit you wore? Black. Have you ever kissed anyone of the same sex, and if so, who? Yeah, just Sara. Who did you last tell to ‘shut up’? Ha, I think my WoW friend Lyndsey, but only playfully, of course. We pick fun at each other all the time. Would you ever get a tattoo of a boyfriend/girlfriend's name? NOOOOOOOOO. Are you one of those girls who already have baby names picked out? I know what I'd name my kids IF I actually wanted any, yeah, but I don't. Do you think guys with long hair are attractive? Yessss, I love long hair on guys. Are any of your siblings taller than you? I think Ashley is a liiiiil bit taller? I know my brother is, for sure. Have you ever scared someone so badly that they cried? Yikes, no. When was the last time you wore high heels? Boy oh boy, no idea. Is there someone that you want to hurt right now? Jeez, no thanks. What was the most interesting or colorful birthday cake you’ve had? I don't remember, but I'm sure something from childhood. What was the last thing someone bought you? Was it expensive? Mom bought me food from McD's, which obviously isn't expensive. Do you have any interesting moles anywhere you don’t want people to know of? No. Have you ever gotten high or drunk in a really formal place? Strong "no" there. Do you ever write poetry and post it on any certain websites? On the very rare occasion I write poetry and actually like it, I'll sometimes post it on dA. What do you miss most about your childhood? Actually, genuinely having fun and not dealing with fucking anhedonia. Would you like to know the precise date of your future death? Hell no. Do you photograph well? I'd like to hope so. Are there any animals you flat out refuse to touch? Maggots and similar bug larvae. What super power would you refuse, if it was offered to you, and why? Mind reading. It just sounds... awful and overwhelming. What’s your favorite discontinued product that you wish would come back? Oh, I KNOW I have answers to this, just none are coming to me immediately and I don't feel like sitting here for five minutes thinking about it. If adults had show and tell, what would you bring into work? My snek! :') If you had a reset button for the last 10 years, would you press it? Tempting, but... I don't think I would. I cannot go through how deep my depression was again. Who is someone you would never swear in front of? My nieces and nephew. Yes, I don't believe in profanity being a "thing" and is just a stupid human fabrication, but nevertheless I acknowledge societal standards and expectations, and they're way too young to get when you shouldn't say something like that and why. Have you ever won a contest or competition? A few. Who is your favorite TV character? I don't think I really have one? Do you coo over other people’s babies? Not really, no. Sometimes I'll think they're super cute and be like "awww," but I don't like... squeal and spaz like some people do. What is something that makes you very squeamish? VOMIT. Has there been a celebrity death that really affected you? Steve Irwin got me deeper than anyone else. Chester Bennington hit real hard, too. If you’re out of high school, have you stayed in touch with your high school friends? If you’re still in school, do you think you will? Most of my closest ones, yes, at least via Facebook. What’s a movie that you want to see? Old movie, but Jacob's Ladder. It was a massive influence on Silent Hill, so naturally, I'll probably love it. It's a classic, anyway. Do you use the same username everywhere online or do you have a lot? I use "Ozzkat" in most places, but I do have some other ones for different sites. Who was the last person you know who became pregnant? My friend Ana recently revealed she's expecting her second child, a boy. What fad were you actually into? I have zero clue. Have you ever tailgated? Would you want to? Fuck no. That's how so many wrecks happen. My sister legit got in a wreck with an 18-wheeler mostly because she was tailgating (which she does BADLY); she was trying to pass, and he moved over at the same time because he couldn't see her coming around. It's a borderline miracle she got out with only some cuts, bruises, and a seatbelt burn. Have patience, people. Get off cars' asses. Why did you fall for the last person romantically? Look, don't get me started on this. There are a shitload of reasons and I have been way too emotional over this the past few days laksdfja;lwke What’s the last thing you had to eat? A bagel w/ cream cheese for breakfast. Do you ever pick up your house phone? We don't have a landline phone. Truth be told, are you more into looks or personalities the most? Personalities, for sure. I cannot be into you if your personality isn't attractive.

[ariadnasdiary]

🏀, 🌙, 🍇, ❤️,🧡 (from the Another Ask Game! Also, hope school treating you well 😭🤙)

Mun Ari: Spoiler ahead… it doesn't ;-; But thank you for asking and the asks! :'D

From here~

🏀 Does your OC have any skills that people wouldn’t expect them to have? Do they have a hobby or pass time that others would consider strange or weird? How did they learn this particular skill or pick up this hobby?

Ariadna: Hmm… There was a time I learnt horse riding in a style called “escaramuza”. Just for a little while and I never competed in any contest ^^’. I learnt it like a year before coming here for a year or so.

Also, it seems around my classmates I’m one of the few people that knows how to drive. Back in Mexico, the legal age is 18 so once you learnt how to drive you can get your license. You don’t require a driving exam: you can get it just for being an adult.

Also I know basic carpenter’s work: I know how to use the machinery and tools. I made a board game, wood rackets and a bird house! I learnt in junior high school since it was a subject, part of the study program and I had to choose between drawing, music production and carpentry so I choose carpentry ^^.

I also know basic embroidery and sewing technics. Embroidery taught me my sis— I mean, I learnt it with online curses! They are very helpful! And sewing I went to learn to a curse. It was a confection curse, but I never finished it ;-;.

🌙 What are some of your OC’s favourites? Favourite food, colour, season, stuff like that! Give some general simple facts that tend to get overlooked!

(already answered here)

🍇 Does your OC have any bad habits? Does your OC have any addictions like smoking or drinking? How did they fall into these habits and why?

Ariadna: No addiction of that kind thank god! I do admit that both Kino and I have a certain obsession with our phones, does that count?

As for bad habits… *sigh* I have to admit that I b-bite my nails whenever I’m anxious, stressed and somehow bored. When I do it when I’m stressed it gets so bad that I even bleed and it hurts for days. Thanks to this… I don’t have pretty fingers. Also there’s the thing that I talk to myself a lot… whenever I think I’m alone, have many things in my mind or to study. I feel so embarrassed whenever someone caughts me!! Now that I think about it… I think that sleeping until too late and with a teddy bear are bad habits as well, right? Oh dear… so many!! ;-;

❤️ What inspired you to make this OC? How long have you had them? How have they changed in the time you’ve been developing them?

Mun Ari: I just wanted to have fun and socialize with other OC accounts really! It took me some years to gather courage and plan Ari as a character and her story within the DL universe~. It’s been… almost 4 years? OMG! The anniversary is in November! OMG! That long!?

Of course, Ari has gone through changes along the way~ She has changed for the better, or so I believe lol. For instance: she’s not that shy as she used to, she has open up with her personality and is a little more sure about herself. We have seen her before falling, in love, and now that she’s in lovein a lonf term relationship she’s in the “comfortable” stage. She has grown up so much as a character *happy and proud sniff*

🧡 What traits of your own do you see in this OC? Are they a little bit self-inserty? Don’t be shy, we all put parts of ourselves into the creations we love!

Mun Ari: Eh… I mean… she’s my semi-self insert so… yeah she has A LOT of me on her. She’s like a legend: half true, half invented(?. So many traits of mine I gave it to her, and many traits both necessary for her to survive and fit in the DL universe and those I wish I had myself jijiji >////<. Not just appeareance, but also personality and habilities as well! So yeah, that’s why I adore her so much: she’s like my baby and my inner child(?. Yeah, is difficult to describe ^^’

[strawberrysoup]

Let’s Review || Chapter 1

Peter Parker knew that his big sister would do anything for him to be safe and happy. She’d given up everything for him twice over already and would do it again in a heartbeat. And that’s why, when the criminal mastermind Tony Stark started inextricably following him around, he didn’t say a word. Because he knew without a doubt Penny would do whatever she had to if it meant keeping Peter safe. He had to protect her, just like she always protected him. He never considered what would happen if Stark decided both Parker siblings were worth taking. Never considered who else in Stark’s inner circle would agree. He just wanted to protect her and yet somehow, they both ended up with needles in their necks

relationship: Steve Rogers/Original Female Character/Bucky Barnes, background Peter Parker/Tony Stark rating: Explicit warnings: Dark Steve Rogers, Dark Bucky Barnes, Dark Tony Stark, Dark Avengers, kidnapping, non-con/dub-con elements, underage Peter Parker, emotional and psychological abuse, very dark, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat

This story is, as advertised, fucked up. It’s inspired by the recent influx of Dark!Steve and Dark!Tony fics and there is a lot of potentially triggering material so please read with caution. Our heroes are not heroes in this story; they’re criminals with limited to no consciences. 

There weren’t many things that Penny Parker could really rely on. Her paychecks fluctuated unfathomably every two weeks, the electricity bill was never consistent, and for some reason even when she drove her car dry it never took the same amount of gas to fill the tank. Peter’s class schedule seemed to change every time she asked about it, his after-school club activities were never on the same day, and why did she have to sign this report card but not last quarter’s, Pete? Consistency was something she’d learned not to hope for. Mostly she kept her fingers crossed that things would somehow work out to her advantage, day by day.

For the most part, it did. She’d dropped out of high school when uncle Ben died to start working, to help support aunt May and Peter. It had taken three years to get her GED between the three jobs she worked, but she managed. GED accomplished, she checked off that box on her mental list and signed up for night classes at the local community college. It was hard, but she could make it work. Then aunt May had died.

Custody of 14 year old Peter Parker had been hotly contested, as Penny had only been 21 at the time of aunt May’s death. Technically, she was an adult. She had two jobs, a steady income, an apartment, a decent credit score. Somehow, like most things in her life, it had just kind of worked out and she was granted sole custody of her younger brother. She’d dropped her night classes, picked up a third job overnight, and kept her fingers crossed that social services never asked why her “two bedroom apartment” only had one bedroom.

Semi-decent luck was the only thing that really kept her life running, and by extension Peter’s. She knew it would wear off someday, she’d been granted the lion’s share of good fortune in Queens when it came to looking after her brother and it wasn’t super fair. She just didn’t think it would end so spectacularly. The end of the luck was supposed to be a low, painful fizzle.

Instead, it was a flashbang that started with Peter acting like a cokehead. Peter had never been a particularly twitchy kid; Penny had leeched all the chaotic energy from their mother’s womb and left the intelligence behind for her kid brother. Over the course of several months though, he’d begun jumping at the drop of a hat. Penny would turn the corner into the kitchen and startle him so badly he’d have an asthma attack. If she even glanced at his phone when a notification lit up the screen he’d lose his mind, accusing her of not respecting his privacy and dart away into his room. Asking if he needed anything from the store was suddenly the Spanish Inquisition and god forbid she offer him a ride to school.

Because she’d graciously left all the IQ points for Peter, Penny had a tendency to do stupid things. Like assume Peter’s behavior was because he had gotten a girlfriend or was just going through usual teenage boy hormones that made him act like a jackass. Luckily the dumbass wasn’t actually a cokehead, considering he still blanched whenever she had weed in the house, but fuck if he wasn’t acting like a freak. It came to a head when she happened to be coming home from her second job at the same time he was getting home from one of his after-school club meetings.

She hadn’t been sure what she was seeing at first. It was definitely Peter, he’d hit a growth spurt finally and started to put on some height and muscle mass but was still a lanky little shit, and he was arguing with a man in a suit who was walking next to him. Both were being followed by a slow-moving car with blacked out windows and no front license plate. Peter’s body language was uncomfortable, arms crossed over his chest, shoulders angled away from the man and tucked in, eyes down.

When Penny called out to Peter, the man had gotten into the backseat of the black car which promptly drove away. Her brother had gone red in the face and ran up the steps to their apartment complex without waiting for her to catch up, locking himself in the bedroom and refusing to come out when she followed him in. She’d given up on being the casual guardian, the cool big sister who let him live his life. Penny had begged him to come out, to tell her what was going on. She just wanted to help, how could she help him if he wouldn’t talk to her?

It had started with simple answers, after Penny had started to cry, through the door.

Who was that man? Tony Stark.

What did he want with Peter? To offer him a job.

Why were they arguing? Because Peter rejected the offer.

He was lying. Penny knew what it sounded like, the way his voice changed. She’d been glued to his side since their parents died when she was 13 and it had only gotten worse with uncle Ben’s passing. Peter was lying through his teeth and Penny had no idea why, no idea what to do. Helplessness had settled over her shoulders like a lead blanket, her chest tightening. If Peter was willing to lie to her, then whatever was happening with Tony Stark was really, really bad. And she had no fucking idea what to do.

***

“JARVIS, bring up Peter’s file.”

The voice cut through the silence of the car like a shot, Happy glancing at the man in the backseat through the rearview mirror questioningly. Usually his boss was in a pretty good mood after having harassed the high school kid he’d become obsessed with over the last several months, but the tone of his voice said otherwise.

“Of course, sir,” the AI responded dutifully from the Stark phone, a document appearing on the screen, “anything in particular, sir?”

“Peter told me he was emancipated after his aunt’s death and that he lived alone. I think my boy’s lying to me, J,” Tony’s voice was lower than usual, irritation apparent in his stony expression.

“Straight home, boss?” Happy asked quietly, humming in response when the man in the backseat nodded.

“Records show that Peter Parker is under the guardianship of one Penelope Parker, 24 years of age, relation: sister.”

“So he did lie to me,” Tony ran a hand over his goatee, sighing through the motion in disappointment before anger overcame him again, “You mean he lives in that shithole with someone? She’s supposed to be taking care of him, that place is a fucking drug den!”

“The police have indeed responded to 23 calls involving illicit drug use in that apartment complex in the last 10 days, sir. Another 10 calls were answered in response to domestic violence, 5 calls in regards to loitering, 7 calls in—”

“Thank you, JARVIS,” he waved his hand impatiently before the AI could recite every reason his boy shouldn’t be living in such a fucking pigsty, “tell me more about Penelope.”

The name was said with enough venom that Happy’s eyebrows went up, glancing once again at his boss in the rearview mirror as he navigated through the congested New York City streets.

“Penelope Parker, 24 years of age, born in New York City, New York. Dropped out of high school at 16, accomplished a GED at 19. Currently employed at Little Hands Daycare, Starbucks Coffee, and Kroger’s. Owner of a 2001 Toyota Camry, license plate 605-CEG, rents a one-bedroom apartment in Queens for $1,200 a month, credit score of 713, 1 speeding ticket, no medical insurance—”

“Stop,” Tony grit his teeth, tilting his head from side to side to crack his neck, “a one-bedroom apartment. No medical insurance. Didn’t even graduate from fucking high school. How the hell did she get custody of my boy?”

“Custody of Peter Parker went to his closest living relative, with the stipulation that social services kept up regular visits on account of the young age of the guardian. Records show that visits kept up for roughly 3 months before ending.”

“3 fucking months, those useless fucks,” it came out as a snarl, “look up the case workers, I want their names. And their heads. On a platter. Get a lock on their wifi signal, I want to know what they’re doing at all times. I already have a tracker on Peter, hack into the GPS on Penelope’s phone and keep track of her too.”

“The phone number listed on Ms. Parker’s work forms is a prepaid burner with no GPS capabilities. I can use triangulation to pick up on her general location when she connects to cell phone towers.”

“Seriously, a burner phone? Is she a drug dealer?” Tony’s eyes shot up to meet Happy’s in the mirror, “Oh my god is my baby’s guardian a drug dealer?”

“There is no evidence of any misconduct on the part of Ms. Parker, sir,” JARVIS stated calmly, despite the edge of infuriated panic from Tony, “she has no arrest record or suspicious activity.”

“That doesn’t mean anything and you know it JARVIS,” Tony pressed his head back into the cushion behind him, squeezing his eyes shut, “I’ve got to get him out of there, sooner rather than later. Happy, once we get home, start coordinating with Rhodey for extraction plans. JARVIS, keep an eye on any activity on their WiFi network.”

“Shall I connect to the webcam on the laptop computer, sir?”

“And the camera on my baby boy’s phone,” on his own phone, Tony opened his picture gallery to swipe through the images he already had of Peter, a small smile taking over his mouth in the process, “Keep any recorded video for at least 24 hours, let me know if anything interesting happens.”

“Of course, sir.”

“Happy, let’s get everyone ready for my boy’s homecoming,” Tony stated, shifting in his seat as they pulled into the private garage beneath Stark Tower, “its coming up sooner than we anticipated.”

***

Penny had started googling Tony Stark the moment she realized Peter wasn’t going to part with anymore information. The longer she sat in front of the laptop, the more panic began to grow in her chest.

Tony Stark was a bad man. A very, very bad man who made very, very dangerous weapons and had lots of very, very important and powerful people in his back pocket. There was no real evidence, of course. None of his misdeeds could be proven in court, none of the weapons he invented could be traced to his company, none of the people he practically owned would even admit to knowing the man. He was incredibly powerful and so fucking dangerous that Penny’s teeth ached at the thought of him even being near her baby brother.

“Fuck,” she muttered dragging both hands through her dark brown hair, “fuck, fuck, fuck.”

There was no reason for a man like Tony Stark to be offering Peter a job. Sure, Peter was smarter than anyone she’d ever met. The kid’s IQ had to be off the charts, he’d gotten into that insanely expensive private science school in Midtown. But there was no reason for Tony Stark to recruit a high school senior, even if he was a budding genius.

“What are you doing Pen?” Peter’s voice was raspy from crying and the sound made Penny jump, turning in her seat to look at the teenager behind her.

“I’m…,” she glanced guiltily at the laptop before sighing, “I didn’t know who Tony Stark was off the top of my head. I had to look him up.”

Peter quickly reached out and closed the internet browser before shutting the lid of the laptop, running his hand through his hair in a way rather reminiscent of his sister, “You shouldn’t google him, he’s got enough of an ego that he probably gets an alert every time his name comes up.”

Penny bit her lip, rubbing her hands together in her lap before gathering as much courage as she could and pushing out the chair at the table next to her, “we need to talk, Pete. I need you to tell me the truth about why he was talking to you, no bullshit. I can’t help you if I don’t know the situation.”

The teenager hesitated for all of 30 seconds before dropping into the chair, his expression one of dismay, “I can’t tell you anything, Penny. Its too dangerous, he could hurt you—”

“I’m not worried about me, Peter,” she cut him off, hand rising when he started to open his mouth again, “Stop. Listen. Its my job to take care of you, to keep you safe. Start from the top, how did you meet Tony Stark?”

Another hesitation, eyes darting away from her face before he answered, “on accident. He saw me on the street, I was looking for a job at one of the coffee shops near school.”

Penny held her tongue, refusing to lecture him on getting a job and derailing the current conversation, “and he approached you?”

“Yeah,” Peter rubbed a hand over the back of his head, “Asked me my name, about my uniform. Asked me if I liked science since I went to a special school. I thought it was cool, he runs a research and development laboratory. Then he started… showing up in different places.”

“You think he was in those places deliberately?” The question was a quiet prompt when Peter seemed to clam up and he nodded in response.

“It was weird, but I… I liked the attention,” it was whispered, tears gathering in his eyes as shame built in his chest, “He told me how, how smart I was and how impressed he was by me. Talked to me about science and then just… about me. He wanted to know what kinds of things I liked to do for fun, what kind of movies I liked. I kind of thought we were friends but then…”

“Its okay, Peter,” Penny reached out and grabbed both of his hands in hers carefully, tears in her eyes as well, “what happened then?”

“He started getting handsy,” he murmured, a shiver going down his spine, “at first it was just, just like him putting his hand on my back when we walked through a door. Or he’d put his arm over the back of my chair and touch my shoulder. It was weird because he was an adult but… he’s handsome, Pen. He’s really, really handsome and I was excited because he was interested in me for some reason but now I realize that it wasn’t good and it’s not good and I shouldn’t have let him and I’m so sorr—”

“Don’t say sorry, Pete,” a quiet sob escaped Penny’s mouth and she covered it with her hand, the other still clutching at his, “Don’t apologize, you have done nothing wrong. Oh God, Peter, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I noticed that you’d started acting differently but I passed it off. Oh my God, I should’ve talked to you so much sooner. I should’ve asked what was going on. How long has this been going on, Peter?”

He was quiet for so long that another sob was ripped from Penny’s lips and she shot forward, dragging her little brother into a nearly suffocating hug. Fuck, fuck how long had that piece of shit been conditioning her little brother. That fucking pedophile how long had he been stalking her little brother. Fuck the age of consent in New York, fuck the law, Peter was a baby—he was a fucking child.

“You don’t have to answer, Peter, its okay,” it was a soft whisper, her hand carding through his hair while he cried against her, “I’m going to figure something out, okay? I don’t know what yet, but I’m going to make sure that he leaves you alone. I’m going to take care of this, I’m going to take care of you.”

“You can’t, Penny,” his cries were breathy and quiet, “you can’t take care of me this time, he’ll hurt you—”

Penny couldn’t say it out loud, because Peter would lose his mind, but Penny would let Tony Stark murder her in front of an audience if it meant he’d leave Peter alone. Every promise she’d ever made, to her mother on her deathbed, to aunt May on hers, was to keep Peter safe. To make sure he had every opportunity. Peter was so smart, he had so much potential, if she could just give him the chance, if she could just get him to the point where he could make something of himself—then she would consider her life perfect. She’d die knowing she had done her job, she’d opened the gates for her brother’s success.

“I’ll figure it out Peter, one way or another.”

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issue 19

it’s 2021 now!! time for more transformers 

we start off w/a flashback showing tyrest retrieving ultra magnus’s body from the ship - and we get a look at magnus’s spark, which is the green color of a 0.1%er [eyes emoji]

tyrest punching magnus..... grrrrr leave my dad alone bastard man

‘the divided self’ what a good title 

rodimus is like listen man this is a lot for my poor thot brain to take in

in flashback land, we see tyrest immediately launch into a crazy person spiel about how he can and will edit the law as he sees fit to conform to the situation, because that doesn't seem like a blatant abuse of power or a huge conflict of interest or anything 

oooh the screen in the corner that says ‘thought warfare,’ I see that

oof, poor magnus. its gotta be rough to hear your boss rant about how bad at your job you are....especially bc this is right after overlord called magnus a joke and nearly killed him

its especially brutal bc as magnus says, his job is his life 

augh, I love the panel where the armor is falling off around minimus, and then the one where he’s holding the ultra magnus head...poetic 

its fascinating that there was an ‘original’ magnus who was an actual guy, and then tyrest chose to make him into this legacy symbol - I'm assuming the OG magnus had no say in this, and probably didn't even know that he was gonna become this lawman legacy figure

I do wanna know though - obviously everyone thought that ultra magnus was one dude, but how did the different guys wearing the armor deal w/that? like, did minimus have people coming up to him like ‘hey ultra magnus old buddy! remember when we fought those guys in that one place? good times!’ like, do they have to study up on the lives of the past armor wearers to prepare for the role of ultra magnus?

augh poor minimus, of course he’s been wondering about what happened with overlord after he was KO’d

oof, drift...I feel like minimus looks surprised and a little skeptical at the idea that drift was the one behind the entire overlord thing - which is interesting bc as we saw at the beginning of the story, he doesn't exactly trust drift, but it’s still pretty far-fetched that one person orchestrated the entire thing

tailgate :(

the concept of a load-bearer is SUPER cool, I love it so much

it also puts a much-needed limit on things - as in, there IS a limit to how much weight/mass a normal cybertronian frame can carry, which is why you don't see everybody upgrading to be Massive - bc they actually CANT

oof, the worst part is that tyrest is RIGHT, minimus essentially DID have a nervous breakdown after the war ended bc of the rigid way he views the world

mental health support is clearly in shambles for cybertronians, yikes. they literally have 1 therapist for their entire race, and he’s not even licensed anymore due to hipaa violations. what a mess

the ‘attention deflectors’ thing is so cool and clever and also a great explanation as to why ratchet or anyone else never said ‘hey wait a minute, you're actually a much smaller dude in a trench coat’ 

I love tailgate knowing all the stuff about the autobot code bc of magnus...my BOY

and THATS why minimus was asking about skids specifically earlier!

oh minimus, please don't put so much stock in tyrest being stable and resonable...

aaaand there's skids and swerve! brainstorm says it best - ‘because something unexpected hasn't happened for at least nine seconds.’ lmao ily brainstorm 

finally checking in w/whirl and cyclonus - god I love that. whirl asking cyclonus how many cons he killed and cyc is like psh I wasn't keeping count....................ok it was six

hhhhh cyclonus IS looking for a cure for tailgate, even though he told tg that there wasn’t anything to hope for....excuse me as I go be emo 

and now we flash over to the unethical medical conduct hell zone, where pharma is being weird and horny and ratchet is appropriately horrified 

I seriously love how unhinged pharma looks, the art & colors do such a good job conveying his feral energy 

ratchet has some massive dick energy for taunting pharma when he’s currently just a head and pharma has dual chainsaws for hands 

ugh, I love whirls speech about anger...and I feel like he really does see cyclonus as a peer, despite cyclonus wanting to kill him, which is why he tells cyclonus all of this 

I fuckgin love that cyclonus’s reaction to very suddenly getting stabbed thru the abdomen is to just glance down at the sword, looking mildly inconvenienced 

back over to ratchet - and at first its like oh wow I can’t believe pharma was stupid enough to let ratchet goad him into this contest....but then you see first aid and ambulon and its like UH OH this is gonna be BAD

the idea that getting sliced in half is no big deal for a cybertronian is wild

‘you're gonna let doctor djd cut us in half?’ yeahhhh that's an appropriate reaction, yikes

FUCKING LENGTHWAYS GOD

pharma you piece of shit

poor ambulon :( :( :( that's fucking brutal. amazing panel but....jesus

and like, to further my point from last issue’s liveblog - the fact that this very gore-y panel is okay, but swearing isn't...that's really funny honestly. I guess robo-gore is acceptable, while I'm guessing regular ole run of the mill human gore wouldn't be

then back to cyclonus, who is still looking only vaguely put out by the sword stuck right thru him

and then cyclonus just pulls it right out, which is a very bad idea for humans but probably not as big of a deal for big near-immortal alien robots

circle of light stuck in capitalistic urban hellscape cubicals 

poor skids, being asked to stand trial while having no idea what his crime is due to Big Amnesia 

OH SHITTTT I totally forgot that getaway shows up here

that is super clever though, with chromedome confusing the name ‘getaway’ with the concept ‘needing to escape’

cant believe tyrest is really dumb enough to tell minimus all his evil plans

BUT that means its time for some very important forged vs constructed cold lore

jro spelling ‘program’ as ‘programme’ made me remember when he said that he considers everyone on the lost light to be british, which is perhaps the least valid thing he’s ever said vhbghjsdbfjkhasbjk

the idea that they used the matrix - which is portrayed as kind of a holy object - in reproductive experiments is really interesting

AUGHHHHH this is all so good and interesting...im really fascinated w/this particular brand of like, alien robot racism/constructism/whatever you wanna call it - I feel like it does such a good job as a plot device, where many other ‘fantasy racism’ concepts from other franchises fail, bc there's not really a ‘human metaphor’ being used here (as far as I know/can tell) - as in, this isn't a thinly veiled metaphor for something that happened/could happen in human history

in fact, this type of bigotry (or w/e you wanna call it) isn't something that is even really possible in humans - I guess if there was a stigma against being born via ivf or something...? but there isn't, so there's no obvious real-world equivalent, which I take as a sign of good writing and worldbuilding - it makes the cybertronians feel more Real, bc of course they would have their own types of bigotry based off of completely different things than humans 

additionally - and this is crucial - tyrest is wrong: there’s no like, inherent moral corruption in cold constructed bots. there's no difference at all, other than method of construction. fantasy racism plotlines often flounder here, with the oppressors having a ‘valid reason’ for oppressing the oppressed, but tyrest is just operated on religious zealot bs and some biased science

like, dude, did you ever think that maybe there are other reasons why your trials only condemned cold constructed bots? like, maybe the trial itself was biased? or societal conditions were to blame? correlation is not causation, my dude, especially when the conclusion is ‘cold constructed bots are inherently SINNERS’ lmao 

like, tyrest rlly said ‘FUCK separation of church and state,’ huh

anyways I just think the whole cold construction vs forged thing is really interesting and well-done, and serves as a good precursor to the more fleshed-out functionism stuff we see later 

so tyrest is clearly off his rockers w/the whole drilling thing - dude, you accidentally gave yourself a lobotomy, okay - but I find it kinda funny that he’s right about a lot of that stuff he said at the end, about primus and the guiding hand and stuff being real 

cyclonus saying ‘tailgate and the others’...I see you, man, I see you

also cyclonus looks fine now??? didn't he just get stabbed??? 

ah, tyrest sprinkling a little light genocide onto his plan to find salvation. nice, dude!

MINIMUS NOOOOOOOOO

‘fully deserved’ SHUT UP BIIIIITCH

poor minimus is taking a lot of Ls this arc, geez

oof, great issue! again, as usual....I loved the lore we got this issue, its so interesting...and some good character stuff too. I love minimus, I feel like he’s gonna be my fav this readthru; my first read my fav was brainstorm, second readthru was whirl, and I feel like its minimus/magnus this time. I just love his character arc...

hype af for more B) 

[rptv-jamesbond]

Obituary: Sir Sean Connery

BBC•October 31, 2020

-

For many, Sean Connery was the definitive James Bond. Suave and cold-hearted, his 007 was every inch the Cold War dinosaur of the books.

He strode across screen, licensed to kill. He moved like a panther, hungry and in search of prey. There was no contest. His great rival, Roger Moore, by contrast, simply cocked an eyebrow, smiled and did a quip.

But whereas Ian Fleming's hero went to Eton, Connery's own background was noticeably short of fast cars, beautiful women and vodka Martinis - either shaken or stirred.

Humble origins

Thomas Sean Connery was born in the Fountainbridge area of Edinburgh on 25 August 1930, the son of a Catholic factory worker and a Protestant domestic cleaner.

His father's family had emigrated from Ireland in the 19th Century; his mother traced her line back to Gaelic speakers from the Isle of Skye.

The area had been in decline for years. Young Tommy Connery was brought up in one room of a tenement with a shared toilet and no hot water.

He left school at 13 with no qualifications and delivered milk, polished coffins and laid bricks, before joining the Royal Navy. Three years later, he was invalided out of the service with stomach ulcers. His arms by now had tattoos which proclaimed his passions: "Scotland forever" and "Mum & Dad".

In Edinburgh, he gained a reputation as "hard man" when six gang members tried to steal from his coat. When he stopped them, he was followed. Connery launched a one-man assault which the future Bond won hands down.

He scraped a living any way he could. He drove trucks, worked as a lifeguard and posed as a model at the Edinburgh College of Art. He spent his spare time bodybuilding.

Too beautiful for words

The artist Richard Demarco, who as a student often painted Connery, described him as "too beautiful for words, a virtual Adonis".

A keen footballer, Connery was good enough to attract the attention of Matt Busby, who offered him a £25-a-week contract at Manchester United.

But, bitten by the acting bug when odd-jobbing at a local theatre, he decided a footballer's career was potentially too short and opted to pursue his luck on the stage. It was, he later said, "one of my more intelligent moves".

In 1953, he was in London competing in the Mr Universe competition. He heard that there were parts going in the chorus of a production of the musical South Pacific. By the following year, he was playing the role of Lieutenant Buzz Adams, made famous on Broadway by Larry Hagman.

American actor Robert Henderson encouraged Connery to educate himself. Henderson lent him works by Ibsen, Shakespeare and Bernard Shaw, and persuaded Connery to take elocution lessons.

Connery made the first of many appearances as a film extra in the 1954 movie Lilacs in the Spring. There were minor roles on television too, including a gangster in an episode of the BBC police drama Dixon of Dock Green.

The ladies will like him....

In 1957, he got his first leading role in Blood Money, a BBC reworking of Requiem for a Heavyweight, in which he portrayed a boxer whose career is in decline.

It had been made famous in America by Hollywood legend Jack Palance. When Palance refused to travel to London, the director's wife suggested Sean.

"The ladies will like him," she said.

A year later, he was alongside Lana Turner - proper Tinsel Town royalty - in the film Another Time, Another Place. Her boyfriend, the mobster Johnny Stompanato, reacted badly to rumours of a romance.

He stormed on set and pulled out a gun. Connery grabbed it from his hand and overpowered him, before others stepped in and kicked him off set.

He was praised for his role in the BBC drama, Blood Money

-

The name's Bond...

And then came Bond. Producers Cubby Broccoli and Harry Saltzman had acquired the rights to film Ian Fleming's novels and were looking for an actor to portray 007.

Richard Burton, Cary Grant and Rex Harrison were all considered, even Lord Lucan and the BBC's Peter Snow.

It was Broccoli's wife, Dana, who persuaded her husband that Connery had the magnetism and sexual chemistry for the part.

That view was not originally shared by Bond's creator, Ian Fleming. "I'm looking for Commander Bond and not an overgrown stuntman," he insisted.

But Broccoli was right, and Fleming was wrong. The author quickly changed his mind when he saw him on screen. He even wrote a half-Scottish history for the character in some of his later works.

A director friend, Terence Young, took Connery under his wing, taking him to expensive restaurants and casinos; teaching him how to carry himself, so the slightly gauche Scot would pass as a suave and sophisticated secret agent.

Connery made the character his own, blending ruthlessness with sardonic wit. Many critics didn't like it and some of the reviews were scathing. But the public did not agree.

The action scenes, sex and exotic locations were a winning formula. The first film, Dr No, made a pile of money at the box office. Even abroad it was hugely successful; with President Kennedy requesting a private screening at the White House.

More outings swiftly followed - From Russia with Love (1963), Goldfinger (1964), Thunderball (1965) and You Only Live Twice (1967).

It was exhausting and occasionally dangerous. At one point, he was thrown into a pool full of sharks with only a flexi-glass screen for protection. When one of the creatures got through, Connery beat the hastiest of retreats.

There was other work, including Alfred Hitchcock's Marnie, and The Hill, a drama about a wartime British Army prison in North Africa.

But by the time You Only Live Twice was completed, Connery was tiring of Bond and feared being typecast.

He turned down On Her Majesty's Secret Service, with the role given to Australian actor George Lazenby, whose career never recovered.

Saltzman and Broccoli lured Connery back for Diamonds Are Forever in 1971, meeting the actor's demand for a then record $1.25m fee. Connery used it to set up the Scottish International Education Trust, supporting the careers of up-and-coming Scottish artists.

The film had mixed reviews, with some critics complaining the film relied too much on camp humour, a theme that would continue and develop under his successor, Roger Moore.

Connery starred in the Rudyard Kipling tale The Man Who Would Be King alongside his great friend Michael Caine, but most of the next decade was spent in supporting roles, such as in Time Bandits, or as part of an ensemble cast in films like A Bridge Too Far.

Never Say Never

Having lost a lot of money in a Spanish land deal, he accepted a lucrative offer to play Bond again, in Never Say Never Again. This time 007 was an ageing hero; older, wiser and self-deprecating but ultimately still as hard as nails.

The title was suggested by Connery's wife, who reminded her husband he had vowed "never to play Bond again".

He continued to play other parts, winning a Bafta for his performance as William of Baskerville in Umberto Eco's The Name of the Rose.

A year later, his performance as a world-weary Irish beat cop, albeit with a definite Scottish accent, in The Untouchables, won him an Oscar for best supporting actor.

In Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, he played Harrison Ford's father, despite being only 12 years older. And there was a knowing nod towards James Bond alongside Nicolas Cage in The Rock, where he was a British secret agent kept imprisoned for decades.

There was box office success for The Hunt for Red October, The Russia House and Entrapment; although First Knight and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen failed to take off.

And he turned down the role of Gandalf in The Lord of the Rings in 2006, declaring himself tired of acting and sick of the "idiots now making films in Hollywood".

Exile

He was briefly considered for the role of the gamekeeper in the 2012 Bond film Skyfall, but the director, Sam Mendes, wisely felt it would be distracting to have a previous 007 appear with Daniel Craig.

Always hating the Hollywood lifestyle, he preferred to play golf at his homes in Spain, Portugal and the Caribbean with his second wife, Micheline Roqubrune, an artist he had met in Morocco.

His previous marriage, to the Australian actress Diane Cilento, had ended in 1975 amid allegations he had been violent towards her and had a string of affairs. They had one son, the actor Jason Connery.

He claimed he remained true to his Scottish roots despite living abroad

-

Despite his exile, he retained a full throated passion for Scotland, despite once misguidedly endorsing a Japanese blend of whisky.

He attributed his short fuse and his "moodiness" to his Celtic genes. "My view is that to get anywhere in life you have to be anti-social,'' he once said. "Otherwise you'll end up being devoured."

A long overdue knighthood, finally awarded in 2000, was reportedly held up by the Labour government because of his support for Scottish independence.

In truth, his Bond is now a museum piece; the portrayal of women impossibly dated. The action scenes are still thrilling, but the sex too often bordered on the non-consensual. ***

Thankfully, it's been a while since 007 slapped a woman on the backside and forced a kiss. But Connery's performance was of its time, enjoyed by millions of both sexes and gave the silver screen a 20th Century icon.

He leaves behind him a body of work that any actor would be proud of and, not least, a vacancy for the title "Greatest Living Scot".

-

***[silly nonsense by politically-correct BBC writer. It’s a freaking movie, not a public service announcement]

https://news.yahoo.com/obituary-sean-connery-122642503.html

[erinptah]

Super Drags review (tl;dr Show Good)

The post where I do my best to spread the Good News, that there exists a saucy gay drag-queen magical-girl animated comedy and everyone should watch it.

Okay, not everyone -- I'll give some caveats at the end -- but definitely a heck of a lot more people than Netflix has bothered to advertise it to.

Look at this! Why did nobody tell me about this??

What is Super Drags?

Fast facts:

It's a 1-season, 5-episode adult animated comedy series, released in November 2018

Here's the official page, with a free-to-view trailer

It packs more explicit, unashamed queerness into those 5 episodes than any other cartoon I can think of

The only possible competitor would be if you took the whole 5000-episode run of Steven Universe and pared it down to a supercut of Just The Gay Parts

This in spite of being produced in Brazil, which (in my broad understanding, as a total non-authority on the subject) is more oppressively, dangerously homophobic than the US

The original is in Portuguese

There is an English dub, fabulously voiced by contestants from RuPaul's Drag Race

It's wrapped in "for adults only!" warnings, not because the content is any less child-friendly than (say) your Bojacks Horsemen or your Ricks and Mortys, but because Brazilian authorities tried to get it shut down on the grounds of this much gay being Harmful For Children

It was (heartbreakingly) not renewed for a second season

Here's a promo video, in which the main characters (Portuguese, with subtitles) play Drag Race judges for Shangela, who ends up voicing Scarlet in English.

And here's a beautiful flashy music video of the big musical number! (Also Portuguese, no subtitles, but the melody and the visuals stand on their own.)

Plot and worldbuilding stuff!

The elevator pitch is "What if Charlie's Angels, but also drag queens, with superpowers, because magical-girl transformations?"

In this universe, all LGBTQ people have magical energy. The Big Bad is an evil magical-drag-queen nemesis who tries to drain our energy for her own purposes. It's like if Ursula from The Little Mermaid was a first-season Sailor Moon villain.

...sidenote, in case you were worried, the representation isn't "cis gay men and nobody else." There's a butch lesbian in the recurring cast, a genderfluid person (in that specific word!) as a one-off love interest, and all the ensemble scenes are wonderful collages of different races, body types, and gender presentations.

Our heroes also fight non-magical everyday homophobes, who get written with scathing realism.

The moment I knew the show wasn't pulling any punches was in the first episode, where a newscaster complains about being Silenced by the Law of Political Correctness, then chirps "however, we have a special guest who is thankfully above the law!"

According to the reviews I've found from Brazilian viewers, it's also pitch-perfect when it comes to local queer culture, community dynamics, slang and speech patterns, even memes. All of which flies right over my head, so here's a post (with no-context spoilers) about one viewer's favorite details.

The handful of reaction posts on Tumblr have a dramatic split between "Brazilian viewers fiercely defending the show as culturally-accurate, uplifting, and brave in a terrifying political moment" and "American viewers complaining that the show is problematic because it's a comedy about drag queens with no perfect role models and lots of sex jokes."

As the Super Drags tell their nemesis (and this is also in the first episode): "How dare you try to turn the LGBTQXYZ community against each other? We do enough of that on our own!"

In between missions, our girls work sitcom retail jobs and deal with other everyday problems. All of which are written in amazingly nuanced and thoughtful ways for a show that also features "defeating an orgy monster with a lip-sync battle."

Detailed character stuff!

Our heroes are Color Coded For Your Convenience!

The Super Drags themselves go by "she" in-uniform, and a lot of the time when out of it. Like the Sailor Starlights, only more so. I'll roll with that.

In blue: Safira Cyan, or Ralph by day, an excitable college-age kid who's built like a football player and squees like a fangirl. (She's an anime fan in the original, and for some reason all the otaku references were replaced in the dub, but you can see them in the subtitles.)

Ralph lives with her younger sister (they play video games together!) and their dad, comes out to them mid-series, and is very shippable with another young guy who starts out reciting the homophobic beliefs he was raised with but whose heart clearly isn't in it.

Safira's weapon is a classic magical-girl wand that casts protective force-fields. Which are shaped like condoms. Because of course.

In yellow: Lemon Chiffon, aka Patrick, the oldest of the group and generally the smartest/most strategic. In most cases, the other two treat her as the de facto team leader -- unless she pushes it too far.

By day she's a single guy with thick thighs and thinning hair, who has some body-image insecurities on the dating scene. And this show has Things To Say about unrealistic beauty standards within the community...not to mention, about masc guys who look down on anyone too flaming or femme because straight people disapprove.

Lemon's weapon is a fluffy boa that can be used as a whip or a lasso, especially when there's a bondage joke to be made.

In red: Scarlet Carmesim, also Donizete, the loudest and most aggressive teammate with the most cutting insults, who refuses to suppress that attitude in an attempt to appease racists. (But will give it a shot when trying not to get fired.)

Donny still lives in her religious/homophobic mom's apartment, and I'm pretty sure it's because neither of them can afford to move out. Her rock-solid sense of fierce self-confidence is the reason it doesn't bring her down.

Scarlet's weapon is a fan that she uses to throw shade. Yeah, you knew that was coming.

The Charlie to these angels is Champagne, who runs operations from a cool magitech compound and breaks the fourth wall at the end to petition for viewers' support in getting a second season.

...we let her down, folks :(

So here's a thing. The show never draws a sharp line between "people who become drag queens because it's a way they're driven to express themselves as gay men" and "people who become drag queens because they were trans women all along." That's consistent with how South American LGBT+ culture works. (Again: best of my knowledge, not personally an authority on this, etc etc.)

Many of the characters, including Champagne, never describe themselves in ways that translate to one of our sharply-defined Anglo-USian identity categories. And I'm not going to try to impose any English labels on them here.

But I can say (in contrast to Safira, Lemon, and Scarlet), Champagne never switches out of her "drag" name/voice/presentation, not even in the most candid off-duty scenes, and still has the same bustline when naked in the tub. Make of that what you will.

You Should Watch This Show

If you have a Netflix subscription, watch Super Drags!

If you ever do a Netflix free trial month in the future, make a note to yourself to watch Super Drags!

It's one of their original productions, so there's no risk of missing your chance because the license expired. But it's absolutely not getting the promotion it deserves. Which means potentially interested viewers won't find it, which means Netflix will think there's no interest, which means they'll keep not promoting it...etc etc etc.

No idea if there's any chance of getting it un-canceled, but maybe we can at least convince them to release it on DVD.

And the sheer gutsiness it took for a group of Brazilian creators to produce this show in the first place -- that deserves to be rewarded with your attention.

In spite of various anti-discrimination laws that sound good on paper, the country has serious problems with homophobia, transphobia, and anti-LGBT violence (warning, article has a violent image which is only partly blurred).

Maybe the creators could've gotten a second season if they made this one softer, less sexually-explicit, more restrained...but honestly? I bet that wouldn't have helped.

Consider Danger & Eggs, an Amazon original cartoon. It was made in the US, thoroughly child-friendly, and restricts its LGBT+ representation to things like "characters go to a Pride celebration...where nobody ever names or describes the quality they're proud of."

And it didn't get renewed past the first season either.

(Note: it had a trans woman showrunner and a queer-heavy creative staff, so I blame all that restraint on executive meddling, not the creators themselves. The showrunner even liked the tweet of my review that complains about it.)

So there's something very satisfying about how Super Drags went all-out, balls-to-the-wall (sometimes literally), all the rep explicit and unapologetic, packing every 25-minute episode with all kinds of queer content that would be censored or muted elsewhere -- but here it's exaggerated and celebrated and just keeps coming.

(...as do jokes like that, and I'm not sorry.)

Okay, there are a few legitimate reasons to not watch this show

Some caveats.

None of these things are Objectively Bad Problems that the show itself should be shamed for...but maybe they're genuinely not your cup of tea.

It does have actual Adult Content beyond "the existence of gay people." This show loves to swing barely-clothed cartoon genitalia in your face. There is, as mentioned, an orgy monster. If that kind of humor is going to bother you too much to appreciate the rest of the show, give it a pass.

I wasn't kidding about how realistic the homophobes are. Opening of the first episode has a guy trying to murder a busload of people while shouting slurs at them. If that level of hatred on-screen is gonna crush your soul, even in a show about sparkly queens flying to the rescue with dick-shaped magical weapons, don't push yourself.

Any fiction with this much crossdressing and gender-transgressing is going to hit some trans viewers in a bad way. Because trans people are such a broad group, with so many different experiences, that Every Possible Trope Involved pushes somebody's buttons. (See also: "some trans readers complain about a storyline that turns out to be drawn from a trans writer's actual life experience".) If this show goes does gender things that turn out to be personally distressing for you...or even just distressing for this specific time in your life...don't feel obligated to keep watching.

It has aggressively-sassy queer characters making jokes and calling each other things that are affectionate in-context, but would not be okay coming from straight/cis people. If you can't wrap your head around that, go watch something else.

Other Than That, Go Watch This Show

For all its big heart, big ambitions, and big gay energy, Super Drags is tiny enough that I've binged the whole show 2 times in the past 2 weeks. Thankfully, it's highly re-watchable -- lots of fun background gags and subtle foreshadowing that you don't catch on the first round.

(Pausing one last time to appreciate that a show with elements like "the high-tech robot assistant is called D.I.L.D.O." can be subtle at all, let alone be this good at it.)

I've also paged through all the fanart on Tumblr and Deviantart, looked up the single fanfic on the AO3, and started brainstorming plans to request it in Yuletide next year. Someone, please, come join me in (the English-language side of) the itty-bitty fandom for this ridiculous, glittery, over-the-top, fabulous series.

[brokehorrorfan]

Event Report: Rhode Island Comic Con 2019

The eighth annual Rhode Island Comic Con took place November 1-3 at the Rhode Island Convention Center and the Dunkin Donuts Center in Providence, RI. With the new layout implemented the previous year proving to be successful, the show ran like a well-oiled machine. When not enamored by the countless vendors, I spent a good deal of the weekend in the panel rooms listening to anecdotes from a host of beloved actors.

The first panel of the weekend was with The Office's Brian Baumgartner (who played Kevin) and Leslie David Baker (who played Stanley). After being forced to turn away dozens of fans from last year's The Office Q&A with other cast members, the convention smartly booked the bigger panel room this time around. They discussed the show's longevity and the possibility of a revival. "It will never be the same," Baker stated, but they remain open to the idea; he encouraged fans to write to NBC if they want to see it. Many laughs were had, with Baumgartner occasionally slipping into his character’s voice, in addition to dropping not one but two "That's what she said!" jokes.

Richard Dreyfuss' panel immediately followed. The Academy Award-winning actor opened by saying that he has answered every Jaws question over the years, so if you ask one he hasn't heard he'll give you $10 - but if you ask one he has heard you owe him $10. He promised more than just funny stories from film sets - although that's what most people wanted to hear. More than half of the 45-minute discussion was dedicated to the absence of civics in today's educational system, a subject on which Dreyfuss wrote a soon-to-be-published book. He did answer a few film-related questions, but the moderator - a local podcast host - did not help the situation.

A Q&A with Freddy Krueger himself, Robert Englund, was a fun way to cap off the first day. A born storyteller with an encyclopedic knowledge of film, his panels are always fascinating. He discussed his work in the A Nightmare on Elm Street franchise at length, citing Part 4 has his favorite performance, New Nightmare as his favorite to make, and Tina from Part 1 as his favorite death scene. With questions culled from Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, Galaxy of Terror, and Never Too Young to Die, Englund called it his most esoteric panel. He concluded by telling the audience about True Terror, a new Travel Channel series he's hosting that's set to premiere in February.

I've never watched a single episode of Star Trek, but I had a hunch that William Shatner's panel would be wildly entertaining - and he proved me right. With no need for a moderator, he began by telling the captive audience about The Ride, an upcoming documentary following his eight-day motorcycle journey from Chicago to Los Angeles, and his new blues album that's due out next year. Surprisingly, there were no Star Trek questions; topics of conversation ranged from Judgment at Nuremberg and Better Late Than Never to working with whales and his likeness being used for Michael Myers' mask in Halloween.

The godfather of the modern action figure, Marty Abrams, shared the fascinating story of his Mego Corporation. While Abrams remained diplomatic, Mego consultant Paul Clarke asserted their side of the infamous Star Wars story. Abrams did not pass on the Star Wars license; he was in Japan working on Micronauts and never had a meeting. In a "perfect storm," Kenner happened to be located in the same building and signed the deal before Abrams returned. He estimates it cost him billions of dollars. It was a riveting companion to the Kenner-centric Star Wars episode of Netflix's The Toys That Made Us. Abrams also revealed that a Micronauts TV series and movie are in development. The recently relaunched Mego is looking into more contemporary packaging and more play value to appeal to the younger demographic. They're also continuing to expand their licenses, with Star Trek: The Next Generation coming soon.

I attempted to attend the Stranger Things panel on Saturday evening, but my lack of a mysterious wristband - about which no advanced information was issued - prevented me from doing so. It was a blessing in disguise, however, as I used the spare time to score a front-row seat for Elijah Wood's Q&A. Despite being one of the headlining guests, Wood was in the smaller panel room, which quickly reached capacity.

Wood shared several anecdotes about The Lord of the Rings, confirming that the fellowship actors have matching tattoos and disclosing that he has never read J.R.R. Tolkien's source material. ("I lived the books," he quipped.) He revealed that although Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency is likely done for good, there have been talks of an animated continuation. He also expressed his desire to direct, stating that he would gravitate toward genre films. He cited The Thing, The Exorcist, Rosemary's Baby, Don't Look Now, Carrie, and The Innocents as his favorite horror films, with Goodnight Mommy, Hereditary, and The Witch being recent favorites. He even rushed off stage to hug a Canadian fan who drove over four hours to see Mandy - produced by Wood's SpectreVision - on the big screen.

Sunday morning kicked off with Christina Ricci's panel. A self-described "very different child," she hypothesized that being raised in a chaotic atmosphere led her to darker roles as a child actress, but playing those parts also impacted her. She cites Buffalo 66 and The Ice Storm among the roles she's most proud of. She loved the technical aspects of working on The Addams Family and considers herself particularly lucky to have worked with Raul Julia. When asked about playing Morticia in an Addams Family reboot, she said she'd be happy to, but it would make more sense for her to play an adult Wednesday. She also discussed making her debut at the age of 7 in a Saturday Night Live skit, an embarrassing experience filming Casper’s kissing scene in the early days of CGI, smoking her first cigarette with Winona Ryder on the set of Mermaids, and understanding the importance of Lizzie Borden upon appearing in New England that weekend.

Like his Star Trek co-star, George Takei was not accompanied by a moderator. He began by speaking about They Called Us Enemy, his new graphic novel about being imprisoned in a Japanese-American interment camp at the age of 5 following the bombing of Pearl Harbor, despite the fact that he and his family were born in America. The subject matter sadly remains relevant, but it was heartening to hear his resolve as well as the audience's reaction. The actor/activist also publicly revealed his support of Pete Buttigieg for the Democratic presidential nomination. He discussed how Star Trek has "lived long and prospered" for over 50 years before proudly speaking about his recent work on AMC's The Terror: Infamy, on which he served as a consultant in addition to acting. While answering fan questions, he shared a humorous anecdote about doing the Howard Stern show for the first time without knowing what he was getting into.

Rhode Island Comic Con marked comedy legend Chevy Chase's first convention, leading a Vacation family reunion, and saw the final public appearance of Sesame Street's former Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch, Caroll Spinney. In addition to those mentioned, the guest list included Gaten Matarazzo (Stranger Things), Benedict Wong (Doctor Strange), Evanna Lynch (Harry Potter), Alfie Allen (Game of Thrones), Anthony Michael Hall (The Breakfast Club), Patrick Warburton (The Tick), Alex Kingston (Doctor Who), Robert Patrick (Terminator 2), Steven Yeun (The Walking Dead), Lou Ferrigno (The Incredible Hulk), Jaleel White (Family Matters), Richard Brake (Three from Hell), professional wrestling legend Mick Foley, and dozens more.

Beyond the impressive line-up of celebrity guests and a wide variety of vendors, Rhode Island Comic Con also featured comic book creators ranging from big names to indie up-and-comers, exclusive merchandise, after parties, kids activities, geek speed dating, and more. Cosplayers are always a highlight, so I was eager to catch the costume contest on Sunday afternoon. A great Buzz Lightyear - who nailed not only the costume but also the mannerisms - took home the grand prize, bringing the weekend’s fun to infinity and beyond.

Click here to see all of my Rhode Island Comic Con 2019 photos.

[scifigeneration]

How science fiction and fantasy can help us make sense of the world

by Gwen Ansell

Costumes from the dystopian novel The Handmaid’s Tale. Jim Lo Scalzo

The world’s a mess. How do thoughtful people make sense of it all? In this series we’ve asked a number of our authors to suggest a book, philosopher, work of art – or anything else, for that matter – that will help to make sense of it all.

Back in the 1990s, some speculative fiction bookshops sold a T-shirt with the slogan, “Reality is for people who can’t cope with fantasy”. Today, bookshops are almost extinct, while fantasy geeks can link to 3-D printers to fabricate their T-shirts.

Speculative fiction consists of multiple varieties, with fantasy and science fiction the two major streams. It has often anticipated new technologies – but that may be the least important reason why reading speculative fiction helps us make sense of the world.

Some writers deny their work belongs in either fantasy or science fiction. Among them, ironically, Margaret Attwood, whose own 1985 “Handmaid’s Tale” time-travelled to the site of some of its own dystopian speculations when Donald Trump became US President in 2017.

While science fiction and fantasy ask that most powerful question “What if?” – they also deal with “This, now”: reflecting it, interrogating it and satirising it.

Global warming

Speculative writers flesh out our passing thoughts into complete, functioning societies and explore how they might unfold. For example Kim Stanley Robinson looked in “New York 2140” at what if global warming flooded Manhattan.

Or, what if a world without gender shaped a language to match, as in Ann Leckie’s award winning “Ancillary Justice”? Leckie, considering her linguistic experiment – all her characters take “she” – notes how this writing tactic affects not only on imagination, but also on the experience of readers in the here and now:

… because it doesn’t use the default gender pronouns, a lot of readers found themselves very aware of the fact that a default was being used, and it wasn’t the normal one… a really interesting experience.

Linked to this, speculative fiction is free to unleash the full power of metaphor. Richard Morgan in “Market Forces”, for example, makes literal the rhetorical assertion that global investment bankers have blood on their hands.

Commenting on NK Jemisin’s Hugo-winning Broken Earth trilogy, The Guardian says:

It is the particular gift of genre fiction to assume a different background to the mainstream and so delineate character from a different angle. Science fiction carries this change of perspectives to extremes. By changing what counts as figure and what as background, the characters can be seen in ways otherwise impossible – and so, ultimately, we can understand ourselves in ways that would otherwise be impossible.

And the borders of “understanding ourselves” are widening. Nnedi Okorafor, Tade Thompson, Jemisin and many others provide examples of Afro-futurism freed from the ethnographic distorting mirror of Black Panther. They follow on from predecessors like Octavia Butler, Samuel R. Delany and Sun Ra.

Just as Okorafor in “Lagoon” and Thompson in “Rosewater” take us to Nigeria to illuminate the “what-ifs” of that society for Nigerians themselves, so the works of Liu Cixin, Xia Jia and multiple other Chinese speculative writers unfold Chinese concerns.

Translator Ken Liu frequently warns against crude interpretations of Chinese speculative fiction as simply veiled criticism of current regimes. He cites Xia’s short story “Tongtong’s Summer”:

It’s not about better plans from the government or magical fairies coming down to save us. Change comes from (…) trying to convert the tools of cold, impersonal technology, of globalised capitalism, into our own freedoms.

Eurocentric massacres

Sometimes, critics reduce speculative fiction to the dystopian visions of past and future presented in the macho and often Eurocentric massacres and rapes of Grimdark military fantasy. Or, they conflate the genre with the thinly disguised right-wing survivalism of much post-apocalyptic SF. But that isn’t all there is.

Advocates of both sub-genres employ defences citing “realism”: war really is hell; people really are engaged in a Darwinian struggle for survival; white men really always rule.

Yet fiction writers make conscious choices about what elements they abstract from the real – and how to use them. There are multiple scholarly explorations of these arguments. Let’s just say here that engaging in fabrication and simultaneously arguing that what has been fabricated is “real” rests on very shaky terrain.

Further, as science fiction author Kameron Hurley argues in her riposte to the tropes of military fantasy sometimes the veracity of the elements writers select is itself shaky. Sometimes they represent arbitrarily Eurocentric picks from a near-infinite landscape.

For a writer such as Aliette de Bodard, of Vietnamese heritage, it’s Annamese dragons that pervade her steampunk, fin de siecle Paris. It’s emblematic of the corrupting history of French colonialism. Introducing such new tropes challenges conservative myth-making. She says:

Because we only talk about heroes, we like to think that, back then, we would be among them. And the truth is – most of us wouldn’t. Actually, most of us aren’t, today (…) we buy cheap clothes, cheap electronics made with labour in horrific conditions.

Get together

The potential to contest is even more striking for those supremacist extrapolations from present to future. Much research suggests that after disasters, people actually get together to help one another.

Speculative writers such as Cory Doctorow react against the way this is under-reported. What if, Doctorow asks, post-apocalypse,

instead of your neighbour coming over with a shotgun, they come over with a covered dish?

His novel “Walkaway” (and Robinson’s “New York 2140”) look forward to just such futures.

Speculative fiction provides vivid cases to provoke debate about such issues and thus helps us “make sense”. Maybe it’s time to wear the T-shirt again, but with a new slogan:

Reality isn’t what you think it is.

About The Author:

Gwen Ansell is an Associate of the Gordon Institute for Business Science at the University of Pretoria

This article is republished from our content partners at The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. 

[theultimateegghead-blog]

Gaming history and releases in 1990.

Welcome to a new series of mine, a celebration of video games over the last few decades. In this series I will be looking over some major events and releases based off of the year. We will start with 1990 and end with 2012. The reason behind this is because this series is not only meant to celebrate gaming, but also some of my friends as well. Thusly every year is dedicated to all my friends and readers born in that year. I am ending at 2012 because that was the year my sisters were born. If you were born before 1990, you are still an awesome person! Consider this prologue in dedication to all my pre-1990 readers. If you were born after 2012, then how did you get here? Regardless, without further ado, lets take a look at some gaming history!

Some major events include...

The first Nintendo World Championships is held.

The first Nintendo World Championships begins on March 8th, 1990. One of the first ever video game competitions, the world championship would make a nationwide run across the united states. (Somewhat defeating the world title.) Contenders would compete with various games that were made for the tournament and would win various prizes such as trophies, money and Nintendo products. The cartridges made for this tournament are considered to be some of the rarest, if not the rarest, video games. The cartridges were given to winners of a Nintendo power contest and they are estimated to be worth 150 grand!

------------------------------------------

THQ is founded.

The video game company THQ is founded in April of 1990. Originally a toy company that occasionally dabbled in video game production, it eventually became a full-fledged game development company. The company lasted until 2016, where it filed for bankruptcy and sold its brand to Nordic Games, now called THQ Nordic. THQ makes licensed games based off animated movies and cartoons, but also has their own original games. Some of there most famous original IPs include Darksiders, Destroy All Humans and Red Faction.

------------------------------------------

The Sega Game Gear Launches in Japan

The Game Gear was Sega’s response to the success of the Nintendo Gameboy. It was released on October 6th, in Japan, seeing a release in America in the next year. While it did support full color graphics and had a technical edge compared to the Gameboy, it also sported a cumbersome size, poor battery life, small library and minimal support from Sega. It was rushed in production and was not able to surpass, let alone match the success of the game boy. It would be discontinued in 97, having sold over 10 million copies in those 7 years.

------------------------------------------

The Super Famicom Launches in Japan.

The Super Famicom, known in America as the Super NES, was one of the most well known and renowned consoles in gaming history. Taking gaming to the next level per se, it had new advanced hardware that allowed it to process games far better than the original NES. Some of the greatest games of all time, such as A Link to the Past and Super Mario World was released on this system. It sold nearly 50 million units and was available in retail until 2003.

------------------------------------------

Some of the most critically acclaimed and important released of this year are…

Super Mario Bros 3

Super Mario 3 would be released to critical acclaim in February 1990. This platforming adventure boast colorful levels and plenty of new things that would become long standing tropes in the Mario franchise. It was one of the best-selling games of all time and had heavy promotion both before and after its release. It was featured in the video game themed move “The Wizard” and then afterwards it spawned a cartoon series that has amassed a cult following in recent years. It is considered by many to be the best Mario game.

------------------------------------------

F-Zero

This Super Famicon/SNES game would see its initial Japanese release in November of 1990. While it was not the first racing game, it was in a way Nintendo bringing racing to home console and it was praised by many for pushing the graphical expectation of games to a new level and for spawning the F-Zero IP, which unfortunately has been left neglected for several years now. While it may not have been the first, it has been cited to be the game that set the standard for racing games to come.

------------------------------------------

Dr. Mario

Dr. Mario was Nintendo’s attempt to create their own puzzle game. While they owned the rights to Tetris at the time, Tetris was not their original creation. Dr. Mario was released for the Gameboy and super Famicon in July 1990. It received generally favorable reviews and would establish Mario as a doctor as well as a plumber. While the series itself has not seen much flare since the 90s, Dr. Mario is playable in several Smash titles.

------------------------------------------

Metal Gear II Solid Snake

Metal Gear II Solid Snake is the second instalment of the Metal Gear franchise and was initially released in July of 1990 for the MSX2. This game would not see an official English release until over a decade later. This game is praised for not only improving on the original Metal Gear game in almost every way, but also establishing the stealth genre. It is considered to be one of the most innovative and advance games of its era, and it was also praised for its more mature theme and story when compared to other titles of that year.

------------------------------------------

Smash TV

Smash TV is an arcade game that came out in April of 1990. This game was one of the first twin stick multidirectional shooter and featured cooperative play as well. It was a game that pushed boundaries with its violence but would not spark as much outcry when compared to future arcade games such as Mortal Kombat. Nevertheless, this game did establish a genre that appeals to those looking for classic arcade fun, games like hotline Miami and Call of Duty Dead Ops could owe a part of their creation to Smash TV.

------------------------------------------

The Secret of Monkey Island

Monkey Island is one of the most revered point and click series gaming has to offer. With various sequels and remakes this game defined a genre. It was initially released in October of 1990. One of the first major games with an emphasis on character and story, this took gaming narrative into a new spotlight, while it was not the only contributor, it was a major contributor to story driven games. It wasn’t half bad graphically either.

------------------------------------------

Railroad Tycoon

The first game in the Tycoon series. This game was a simple railroad business simulator, where you built a railroad empire and try to maintain it. While the concept might sound boring to some, it did herald the beginning of a long running series and could be considered one of the origins of the simulator genre. While I cannot say it is solely responsible for later simulator games like the sims, it could be considered the grandfather of business simulators.

------------------------------------------

Alpha Waves

This game is relatively unknown, but it does hold some importance. Released in August of 1990, Alpha Waves is one of the first ever full 3D games. This game was somewhat of an art project and is rather abstract and artistic in design. While it does hold significant importance in the evolution of graphics, it is more of an experience than an actual full fledged game.

------------------------------------------

Fire Emblem Shadow Dragon and the Blade of Light

The Fire Emblem series is a long-lasting series of tactical RPGs that remained primarily in Japan until the 2000s. This is the first Fire Emblem game and it was released exclusive in Japan in April of 1990. This game was deep for its time, featuring a story and characters who could die permanently. While America never saw this title, they eventually got a remaster nearly 15 years later.  This game stabilized the tactical rpg as a genre and is considered to be one of Nintendo’s greatest series.

------------------------------------------

This concludes my analysis on some gaming events and releases of the year 1990. If you were born in 1990, then happy birth year to you! See you in 91!