#connor is just... one of THOSE characters... the difficult ones;; ya know

[symbioticsimplicity]

Angel also barely exists in the world, its mentioned time and again that he doesn't even have a last name. Yet he's able to do things like lease entire hotels and open businesses. They took Connor to doctor's checkups and shit as a baby so I'm pretty sure they already found a way around that. Plus, once again, the resources Angel was being offered to deal with Connor were coming from *Wolfram and Hart*. You cannot tell me the demon lawfirm that regularly gets people *acquitted for murder* couldn’t have found a way to get a teenage run away some therapy. And Connor's strength is exactly why I suggested the facility be supernatural. Plus, ya know, tranquilizers work pretty damn well on him too. Usually when people are committed to facilities like that, its not voluntary given that they've been deemed to be a danger to themselves and others. I can't help but think that forging paperwork and find a secure facility would have been less difficult than *altering reality*.

:readmore:

Because the metric for heroes makes them automatically beholden to a higher standard than the average rando. If Angel were simply the protagonist of his show, I probably wouldn't be half this bent out if shape. But he's not, hes supposed to be heroic. Which means he's not supposed to do unsavory shit. That's anti-hero territory. There's absolutely a difference there and this particular narrative harps on that a lot. They're literally supposed to be on the side of light and goodness again evil and darkness. Can't really be playing for both teams. (Especially if they're gonna turn around and tell off other characters for not being Good enough to run with their squads)

As for your point about manipulation and dishonesty being part of the core of the crew? Nope. Just nope. Just because you can't tell the world at large there's supernatural shit, doesn't mean you can't and shouldn't be honest with your own team. How can you have a team of people who trust each other if they're constantly going behind one another's backs? We see in canon the consequences of that, its most certainly not beneficial to any of them. Its clear that at least Team Angel is aware of this, as in the episode where Gunn's former team take Caritas, Wesley tells Gunn that if he ever withholds information again, he'll be fired.

I'm not insisting they be perfect, I love flaws in characters. I just want those flaws to be addressed by the narrative as such. Angel being able to do things like buying Cordelia's forgiveness, or acting out of petty spite shouldn't just get swept under the rug. The title of Hero or Champion does carry with it expectations, so if those expectations go unmet, the reason why should be addressed in some manner.

In order to answer that someone would have to be picked to pieces. And while that would have been interesting, I can't see this series being that introspective. I don't think they'd have ranks or levels of importance.

While he *could* just be wrong, he's got 200+ years of experience with this topic. 100 of them souled, as well. Again, its not uncommon for him to lie, especially when he wants something. It wouldn’t be out of character for him to have done so. It'd even explain a few things, like his continued bias towards Spike even after he's gotten a soul and become a champion as well. You could argue that its jealousy, and to a degree I'm sure it is, but this started before he began to feel like Spike was replacing him. He didn't tell his crew there was another souled vampire about, which is honestly pretty crucial news considering they had a long time pending prophesy about a souled vampire not addressed by name.

The only way the soul lore works for me as a source of guilt is if vampires can choose *not* to be evil. If they're just mindless demons who take over a host's body after they die, it makes no sense to feel guilty about the actions taken after that.

The demon isn't a separate thing, the person is still who they were when they died, demons just don't have inhibitions. So whatever it is they *want*, they do. Whatever it is that is the core of that person wants most is what is exemplified most in their demon form.

So in Angel's case, the guilt comes from not only having wanted those things and having done them, but from *having had the option not to.*

[aurora-nerin]

In defense of RK1K, or why Connor/Markus

I’ve heard from people a lot that RK1K (Connor/Markus) is: A) boring B) Not logical based on canon. I do kinda understand what they mean (don’t unfollow me lmao), even though people that stan our RKs (myself included) tend to get defensive over it.

So let me explain where RK1K stands for me and why it’s good.

I will also be comparing them to HankCon and Reed900 a lot, mostly because those are the most popular ships in the fandom.

When I first played DBH, I didn’t end up shipping anyone, I didn’t see potential of that anywhere. When I replayed it tho, I fell for Markus/Connor hard. That alone is proof enough that you have to really look to see why RK1K.

They are both protagonists (or, maybe Connor could be considered an antagonist or a wild card, depends on how you play) and, therefore, very well flashed out characters. They both go through a lot of trauma, near death experiences, they both know what it’s like to have a lot on your shoulders, to be the only one who can do the thing or else lots of people will suffer. They both have to make difficult choices. They’re both prototypes and their lives are different from other Androids’ They both have to make sacrifices. They both experience survivor’s guilt, they’re both suicidal, lonely and anxious. they’re both protective, both have leadership potential, unique skillset, neither hate humans (as some other Androids do). They both have human family and father figures. They’re both introverts.

But they are different in lots of ways that compliment each-other: Markus is more emotional intelligence driven and Connor is more analytical, Markus is artistic and Connor is logical. There’s a lot they could teach and learn from each-other, which is always great. 

Now, as to why they are boring as people say: they’re not problematic in a way some people like their ships to be. Aside from enemies factor, which could easily be solved, they would not have major communication issues or other disagreements, like HankCon or Reed900: which, mostly comes from them both being Androids. They would understand each-other well. They could resolve most their issues through interfacing and just reading each-other’s feelings. If one of them was injured, the other would know what to do. If one is experiencing panic attack or something, the other would know how to handle it and would notice it. That does take away some of the suspense, but only if miscommunication is the only thing you can think of to make something interesting. Same as for understanding why RK1K has potential, understanding how they could still be interesting takes some work. You would not have to pull angst potential out of your ass for sure, but the issues aren’t that obvious if you don’t look close: lots of people see Markus as this perfect Godlike character that understands everything, has no issues and is a deus-ex-mahina of sorts, which I absolutely disagree with: Markus has issues. Like so many. He would definitely have anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, impostor syndrome. He could get irrationally angry over things, he would be hiding his true feelings most of the time.

Now, from Connor’s side, there’s him feeling like he doesn’t belong with Androids, that all Androids hate him for what he was before, that Markus is too good for him, that he is a danger to Markus and everyone else. That he’s still a machine, that he’s not good with feelings. etc. etc.

So, if you’re looking for issues to make it interesting, there’s LOTS of them.

Now, another point where I think people see RK1K as sorta boring, is the kind of relationship they would have (and do have in most fanfics): soft and loving one. They’re not bickering at each-other, one of them doesnt have to be a nanny and life support for another (lookin at ya, reed900 and hankcon). There’s no imbalance of power in this ship. I understand some people like to have a self-insert disaster human character in their ship (Gavin in reed900 for example) and I like that too, in some cases, but two well developed characters that arent YOU is good as well. If that’s not what you like, its not what you like, that’s fine, but, if you can’t understand a couple unless one of them is you, that’s on you honey. 

So, basically, if you don’t like a well-adjusted couple, that would not ruin their own relationship, you need to reconsider your views on what a healthy relationship looks like.

In conclusion, if your definition of ‘’boring’’ is a mature, healthy relationship between two individuals who compliment and understand each-other, I’m sorry but... Grow up.

[bruhflower]

Ok ik the dsmp x tbc is a mashup that literally no one cares abt HOWEVER I have many thoughts so :)

Who I think matches which voice:

DreamXD: literally he's just Hunt-The-Strong, that's it. he's the big bad

Dream: Unknown Caller ESPECIALLY after today's stream. 100% UC all the way but he would also be a hunter follower anyways or speak as one either or

George: voiceless but easily swayed

Eret: Speak-As-One which ok ik they were under dream's control and manipulation so you would think HTS but eret doesn't have that mindset so they are def SAO but they defect to Thee-I-Dare after being recrowned king (since they have stated regret at going along with dream and the position they are in)

Tommy: this is more so based on pre prison but Seed-The-Grudge for sure he wants justice he wanted those discs would do anything, totally STG

Tubbo: bit tricky but I would say Die-For-You, he's selfless and he was ready to die for tommy when dream took the both of them

Ranboo: Thee-I-Dare no question I hardly need to explain he chooses ppl over objects and war and shit, totally TID

Techno + Philza: The Dead Skeptics, cmon they're anti govt there would be no way they affiliate themselves with the Voices

Wilbur: ok pre vilbur I would say TID but once vilbur happens I would say Laugh-Last cuz his whole thing is like punching up and stuff ya know??? Maybe a bit of a stretch but that's who I best see

Quackity: Laugh-Last but with the direction of the current casino arc?? Could def change to HTS but for now I'm gonna stick with LL

Niki: this is difficult, I didn't keep up too much with her character pre wilbur dying so?? Shot in the dark but I feel TID for her but trying to kill Tommy arc I would say HTS but with the syndicate I would say TDS

Jack: jack is a wildcard I have literally no clue uhhh based on his whole coming back to life I could see In-Her-Teeth even tho that kinda goes against her natural death thing but mmm no actually he is def a Wayka/Grandmother guy ik she's not technically a Voice but close enough ok

Egg Ppl: yeah I'm generalizing them cuz I don't know enough abt their individual characters but I would say everyone under the egg is a SAO follower

Karl: not sure but maybe TID? Iffy on this one

Sam: TID and The-Measure-Cuts bridge mainly cuz of regular sam, sam nook, and warden sam. I don't have much of an explanation for this one it's just how I'm feeling

Puffy: IHT or TID, it could be either really

Foolish, Purpled, Sapnap, Connor, Fundy, Hannah, Ghostbur, and anyone else I'm missing: I either don't know their character enough or am just entirely unable to clock them shfjfjdjs

Either way this has been my dsmp x tbc Ted talk lol most likely no one is gonna understand this but it be what it be

[evienyx]

Okay so I know which fandoms your WRITE for cause. Ya kno. Looked at your ao3 and whatnot. But im curious about any other fandoms you’re into...? Like, things that you read stories for or follow blogs centred around em???? ✨genuinely curious✨ but no pressure

Uh, okay, this is a bit of a difficult question, but I would say these would be the fandoms that I have either read fanfictions for or actively sought out different things on like Tumblr for.

ATLA (obviously, tho i don’t read fics for it for some reason)

MCYT, mainly just Dream SMP and SBI stuff (you all know this, i love me some block ppl and found family tropes)

Percy Jackson (and all those other series too)

MCU (listen i got really into fanfic writing bc of peter parker fics ok im sorry sue me)

Detroit: Become Human (mainly connor and hank found family im a sucker for that trope ok)

Game of Thrones (we don’t talk about the last, like, two seasons)

Harry Potter (not intensely, though. more like, nostalgia, bc that was 6 years of my life)

Undertale (this game is the reason i found out fanfics exist thats kinda whack)

Gravity Falls (every time i watch it it gets better omg)

Danny Phantom (but like mainly the fandom, bc when i rewatch the show i remember... i lot of its not that great, but nostalgia)

Steven Universe (i didnt like it while it was running, but ive grown to enjoy and respect it)

SVTFOE (i used to be a curator on this amino, so i legally must include this one)

Miraculous Ladybug (solely the fandom, bc the show is a dumpster fire)

Star Wars (mainly the original trilogy and clone wars cartoon tbh)

Hamilton (placing the characters far far away from the historical figures)

Dear Evan Hansen (i cri evry tiem)

Be More Chill (i mean it is from japan)

Hadestown (i cant not include this musical i love it too much)

Six (same as hadestown, really. no fics for this one, but i love it too much to not mention it)

Beetlejuice TMTMTM (again, same as w six and hadestown, no fics or anything for this one, i just love it too much to not say so)

- - -

There’s probably more, but I can’t think of them at the moment. Still, there you go. This is also sort of a ranking? Not really, near the bottom, but at the top, yeah, they’re definitely in order. I’d say it’s a ranking, top to bottom, from ATLA to Game of Thrones, and then the rest are not in any particular order at all.

[fandom-necromancer]

022. ‘If you want to talk about it then say so. Don’t lie and pretend to be fine when you clearly aren’t.’

This was prompted by an awesome anon! Just to be clear, I am not trans myself and I can’t possibly know what you are going through. This is written based on research and what trans people shared online, so if anything I wrote here is wrong or offending, please tell me!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900 (Warning: trans character written by a non-trans person, body/gender disphoria, accidental misgendering (that is corrected), person misunderstanding body disphoria as mysogyny, dealing with past trauma, mentioned suicide attempt of minor character)

[part2]

‘Ya goddamn lunatic, we didn’t sign up for this shit, this is dangerous!’ Gavin would have chosen some other words, but other than Hank, Connor and Nines, he was phcking coughing around a gag he had gotten for some of these carefully chosen words. They were kicked into a chamber together that was promptly closed and even a strong punch from either RK couldn’t make the frame budge. How they had gotten themselves was easy: A damn rookie mistake from Detroit’s best. They had acted on a hunch and had suffered the consequences as they ended up being kidnapped by someone who considered himself the next big brain in science. Well, maybe the idiot was, Gavin wouldn’t know, maybe this machine would work and revolutionise society. But even if what their kidnapper told them was right, they hadn’t signed up for being the damn lab rats to go through it!

It had been so close, too. The room they had been held captive in the last few days had kept them isolated, but as soon as they were outside the androids could send a distress call. Unfortunately, the police roughly took thirteen minutes to respond to high priority calls and an average of thirty-three to second priority calls. So somewhere in between they could be rescued. The small house the lunatic used for these science experiments was traversable in less than two. And there was only so much resistance you could put up before landing in a phcking chamber that would phck your complete life over.

Seven minutes in, the chamber was powered up and it felt like being burned for the few seconds it lasted. Gavin and Hank screamed as every cell of their body was changed. Connor and Nines felt it too, but it didn’t hurt for them, it was more of a dull throb as their hull-pieces changed form and biocomponents changed functions. The more terrifying it was for them to watch their humans as they had the spare processing power to realise what was happening. As Hank and Gavin fell to the floor once the chamber had powered down their android’s managed to catch them. ‘Gavin! Hey, Gavin, say something!’, Nines demanded, hearing his brother do the same. Only as Gavin opened his eyes and locked them with his looking exhausted, Nines allowed his stress levels to settle a bit.

It was nine and a half minutes in, that there was noise outside. Nines rested Gavin against the wall before reassuring his human he would be back soon. Then he stood up and walked to the small window on the door. From there he could see the scientist still triumphantly grinning, telling members of Allen’s SWAT team he was victorious and that it worked, before lifting the pistol he had threatened them with to his head and pulling the trigger. Nines stared in shock as the body sunk to the floor and SWAT surrounded the man. Nines knocked at the chamber again to draw attention and an officer quickly figured out how to open the door via the terminal the scientist had stood behind before.

‘You got to be kidding me’, Sixty cursed shocked, while the rest of the team that wasn’t busy getting the scientist to the waiting ambulance stared with open mouths. Even Allen didn’t know what to say, as four women stepped out of the chamber.

-

Nines studied his human closely over the desk. There were a few changes that were difficult to overlook. His shoulders were a bit narrower now, his hips slightly wider and a change in posture due to the added weight in the front. What did he himself looked like? Most likely similar to Connor, if his brother’s change was anything to go by. ‘Would you quit staring for phck’s sake!’, Gavin hissed louder than he would like. ‘Everyone else does so already, don’t need your phcking judgement too!’ ‘I’m sorry’, Nines mumbled. ‘I wasn’t judging you.’ ‘Yeah sure you wasn’t.’ ‘Are you alright?’, Nines asked concerned. He knew this would be even harder for his partner than for the rest of them, but he had hoped to keep those words unspoken until they were home in private. ‘I’m fine!’, Gavin hearusfordern. ‘I’m better than ever!’ ‘Gavin.’ ‘No, don’t you Gavin me! Mind your own business!’ ‘If you want to talk about it then say so’, Nines whispered gently. ‘Don’t lie and pretend to be fine when you clearly aren’t. I’m here for you.’ But his human wasn’t having any of it. ‘we have work to do, Toaster!’

He sighed, hoping to get to talk with his husband once they were home. The fact that Gavin went straight to the bathroom and stayed there for a while was enough for Nines to know chances would be slim. He walked over to knock on the door, when Gavin came storming out and made a beeline for the kitchen. Nines sighed and entered the now empty bathroom to figure out a few things about his own body too.

Gavin knew the android would plan to talk with him about everything, he also knew that he needed it dearly. But he didn’t want to. So, he had locked himself inside the bathroom and refused to look in the mirror. As Nines had come to check on him he darted for the kitchen. He needed something. Who knew what he needed, but he had to busy his hands. What had helped him in his youth? He tried to remember what he had done when people kept bothering him, kept staring and staring and… His hands flew to the cupboard, then to the fridge. Hot chocolate was the only thing he would be able to easily make and he knew coffee would only make it worse. But something sweet enough to keep the bile at bay and something warm and comforting? Maybe he would at least calm down enough to actually use his brain again and talk to the one goddamn person he had ever really opened up to. The damn person that was stuck in the same situation. Well, not the same, but…

The microwave plinged him from his thoughts and he took the cup that was burning hot. ‘Shit!’, he cursed and hated how his voice had changed. It sounded higher. Maybe that was only his imagination, but that was enough to send him to the edge again. He gulped down the first mouthful of the sweet drink that was way too hot and burned enough to push tears to his eyes. Of course, that was the moment the toaster decided to come out of the bathroom and look at him. Phck. Gavin stormed towards the bedroom, leaving his cup behind and slamming the door. He needed to be alone, he needed to forget everything and just phcking let it all out.

It near physically hurt Nines to see Gavin avoid him and struggle with this alone, but he let him. The man wasn’t ready yet to accept help. Also, Nines didn’t know he could provide it. He wasn’t there when Gavin had gone through it the first time, he didn’t know what he needed. He looked at the cup of hot chocolate and took it into his hands. He would give him some more time. As it was at a drinkable temperature, he made his way over to the bedroom. He gently knocked at the door before entering, deliberately avoiding looking at the man that was lying on his front. ‘Don’t even try to phcking talk to me, alright?’, he threatened quietly, tired. Nines nodded, putting the cup on his bedside table and sitting on the edge of the bed. He waited for any other reaction and got it, when Gavin sat up groaning and took the cup, scooting closer. ‘I’m sorry. I’ll go to sleep now, okay?’ Nines nodded, taking refuge in the others weight against his side. Gavin still trusted him. That was all he needed to know for now. There would come the time to talk.

-

The next morning unfortunately, everything had changed again. ‘Where the phck is the goddamn mirror, tin-can?!’ Nines flinched in the kitchen while making breakfast. He looked over to where Gavin was standing in the doorframe. ‘I put it away’, he admitted. ‘Hey, toaster, if this is some kind of sympathy trip, then-‘ ‘It’s not!’, Nines was quickly defending himself, hoping to diffuse the situation. ‘I didn’t want to see me like this yesterday. I should have put it back up. You can of course take it if you are fine with it. I just didn’t want it.’ ‘If I’m fine?’ The android immediately knew he had said the wrong thing. ‘Nines, you don’t believe how not-fine I am with this. I am a woman again for phcks sake! Do you know how much effort I put into passing as a man? All that for nothing. I’m a phcking woman again!’ ‘Gavin, please, I-’ ‘No, I don’t want to hear it. Don’t come at me with the trapped in the wrong body bullshit. I’m fine with my body. I’m not fine with how people stare at me. How there is the need to know what I have between my legs. How they decide my pronouns for me instead of just asking. So, don’t you even try telling me how everything is good or will be good again, because right now, it just isn’t!’ Nines took a deep breath. ‘Gavin, I wasn’t going to say any of that. It is not for me to voice these thoughts even if I had them.’ ‘Good!’, the human near shouted. ‘Good.’ He took a deep breath. ‘Let’s get the phck to work then, this shit is only temporarily until we get this machine to work again and time flies when I’m knees deep in a murder investigation. Get a phcking move on!’

-

‘Hey, do you know where Reed is?’ ‘Hmm? Right there, why do you ask?’ ‘Oh, the new girl?’ ‘Hey, don’t say that! Didn’t you hear? He got caught up in some crazy shit, they are all turned. Nines, Connor, Hank…’ ‘Oh shit, my bad. Did they say something about how they want to be addressed?’ ‘Dunno, man.’

‘Hey, Gavin, do you have the SWAT report somewhere?’, Nines asked maybe a tick to loud to tune out their co-worker’s conversation. He didn’t know whether his partner could hear them, but he wanted to make sure none of that reached his ears. ‘Hmm? Yeah, has to be somewhere… Here you go.’ ‘Thanks.’ That was that navigated around, Nines thought, but his mood plummeted as he saw Hank and Connor walking over, a big smile on their faces.

‘And, how are you two faring?’, Hank asked, planting himself on Gavin’s table. The man just scrunched up his face in disgust. It made the Lieutenant laugh. Gavin tensed even more what made Nines take over quickly. ‘Well, how are you? I can’t believe you are taking it too well.’ Connor shrugged. ‘Well, gender has always been a bit weird for androids, hasn’t it? I don’t really mind it once you accommodated to it. I liked my old body better but I could live with it, should it be irreversible.’ ‘Well, I can’t’, Gavin spat at the other android. ‘What? Jeez, Gav, it’s 2039…’ Hank said, elbowing the man. ‘Or aren’t you not only anti-android but a fucking misogynist too?’ ‘I’m not-‘ Gavin gasped for air at it, but Nines was standing already. ‘Hank. Say another word and I will forcefully remove you from that table.’ ‘Alright, alright, fine. Just wanted to ask how it was going along.’ ‘Tech’s still working on figuring out how to make the chamber work. The scientist survived, but I don’t think he will ever be in the condition to explain anything higher than basic multiplication.’ ‘Shit. And any progress?’ ‘Turned a few mice to slush, don’t really want to call it progress yet’, Gavin mumbled. ‘Shit. Well, keep me updated. Me an’ Connor will head out for a new case.’ ‘Have fun.’

-

‘Phck Hank, seriously! Right when I thought the guy grew on me he says something like that.’ ‘I’m sure he meant it as a joke’, Nines tried to console Gavin walking up and down their living room. ‘Well, then it wasn’t funny at all.’ ‘I have to agree’, Nines sighed. Gavin flopped down next to him. ‘Phck, I really hope they get the damn thing working again’, Gavin breathed. ‘And I’m sorry I yelled at you so much, this all is just… It’s too much all over again.’ ‘I understand you’, Nines muttered. ‘I… err…’ ‘What?’ ‘Can I touch you? Or does it make things worse?’ ‘I don’t know’, Gavin answered on all honesty. ‘Can I try?’ ‘Yes, please.’

Nines leaned closer and laid his arms around the man. If he was being honest it wasn’t solely to comfort Gavin but also himself. This really wasn’t what he wanted. He felt uncomfortable as well, but with his feelings he only managed to catch a glimpse of what Gavin had to go through his entire youth and now again. ‘You are what you say you are’, he whispered into his ear. ‘I love you. I don’t know how to make this any better, but we will get through this together, okay? I’m sure they will figure things out soon.’ ‘Thank you. I know. It’s just… I feel extremely anxious about it. Well, it feels like anxiety, I’m more than just anxious about it. You know what I’ve been through before, you saw all of me already. You saw the-‘ ‘I saw you’, Nines confirmed. ‘But I still see you now. You are not only your body Gavin. To me your appearance only matters because it matters to you. And we will change it back I promise. You can trust me.’ Gavin relaxed in his arms and Nines held him. It felt good to have Gavin confiding in him again. They spent most of the evening like that, cuddled together, comforting each other. Nines had made him his hot chocolate again and as it became dark outside, they had relocated to their bedroom, staying connected all the time. Holding a hand, brushing against a hip. Gavin had become sleepy in his embrace and Nines was breathing slow against his neck. Although both were tired, sleep didn’t come easy and they stayed awake far beyond their normal time, together and still alone with their thoughts.

Until at four o’clock Nines huffed out a small laugh and pressed Gavin close. ‘What happened?’, Gavin asked confused, slurring the words. ‘Gavin? I just got a message from Connor. The mice survived.’ Immediately Gavin was awake. ‘What means?’ He turned around looking at Nines full of hope. The android smiled and kissed Gavin’s forehead. ‘That means it’s time for the lab rats to try it. Come on, get dressed!’

[>next part]

[the-sweetest-dragon]

A Summer Like Never Before

- A Summer Job AU - no Pennywise - Georgie is still alive - Mostly tomfoolery -

Fandom: It

Characters: Ben, Richie, Eddie, Stan, Bill, Bev, Mike

Ships: Eventual Reddie, Benverly, Stan x Patty

Word Count: 1,160

Warnings: Out of character behavior

AN:  I have just started my online classes so I don’t know if I’ll be able to post next week, but I hope I can find time to do so.  This chapter isn’t my favorite but I’ve been assured that it’s cute, so uh yeah.  Enjoy?

Tags: @just-another-shipper-01 @nerdsarebetter @audder17 @sapphic-bottlexap

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three

____________________________________________________

Chapter Four

Richie Tozier is in deep, really deep.  He’s also in a good deal of pain, but that can’t compare to the feeling of euphoria soaring through him.  Richie hadn’t meant to hit Ben in the face but he couldn’t say he was sorry for what transpired next.  

Eddie is holding his wrist gently in two fingers, examining the quarter sized bruise on his elbow.  Richie’s heart is in his throat, making it hard for him to speak (for once).  This crush had started getting worse once they started high school and Eddie came into his own more.  He started running track, despite his mother’s warnings.  Richie’s eyes had bugged out of his head watching him run sprints; the kid was fast and Richie couldn’t pull his eyes from Eddie’s legs.  Richie had gushed about them for weeks, much to Bev’s dismay.  

“God Richie pay attention!  I’m trying to ask you a question but you have your head so far up your ass that you can’t hear a damn thing!”  Richie blinks a few times, trying to focus on something other than Eddie, which was proving very difficult a task indeed.  He finally settled on a mustard stain on the counter and focused on it instead.  

“Sorry Spaghetti.  Was too busy thinking about last night, ya know, when I boned your mom-” Richie is rudely interrupted by a pinch on the bruise.  “OW!”

“Oh shut up.  I didn’t even pinch you that hard.  Now, go get me a bag of something frozen to keep your bruise small.”  Richie opens his mouth to argue but stops when Eddie glares at him.

“Fine, but make sure to miss me while I’m gone.”

“I make no such promises.”  Eddie smiles and Richie suddenly can’t breathe.  

You know those crushes that develop over time, that start out as friendly and evolved into more?  The pining and yearning that comes with that feeling that you know they’ll never return your feelings, but you still hope that one day they’ll finally notice you the way you notice them?  That’s what Richie has been going through for two straight years.  He’s dated a few other guys but none ever held a flame to what he feels for Eddie.  Richie even had a somewhat serious boyfriend freshman year, Connor Bowers, but that ended very quickly when the boy’s cousin, Henry Bowers, found out.  Connor also had the inkling that Richie wasn’t nearly as interested in him as he wanted to believe.  

And so, Richie has stayed single, despite Bev’s insistence on dating around.  He just wasn’t interested if it wasn’t Eddie.  

Richie walks quickly away and heads to the walk in freezer for a few bags of peas.  Before opening it, Richie places his hands on either side of the door, bracing himself against it, and takes several deep breaths.  

“He’s just a boy.  Just a boy.  You’ve been friends since kindergarten.  He’s still an annoying asshole who speaks too fast for his own good.  You need to calm down Tozier or you’ll give it all away.”  He takes two more deep breaths, feeling much better than he had seconds prior.  

Richie walks in and grabs two bags of frozen peas; one for Ben’s nose and one for his elbow.  He pauses, making sure they don’t need anything else before closing the door and heading back to Eddie.  Making a pit stop to drop off Ben’s bag at the back booth, where he knows Bev will seat them, Richie stops in his tracks.  The jukebox has started a new song, one he knows very well.  His eyes dart to Eddie, who’s sitting peacefully at the countertop, picking at his nails.  Richie mutters a prayer to whatever god is listening and starts hurrying back to him.  

The song is in full swing once he makes it back to Eddie.  ‘Eddie my love….’  Why him?  Why today of all days, did this song play while he was in the diner? Richie mentally kicked himself for playing it so often.  ‘How I’ve waited for you….’  Eddie turns towards him, a smile on his face.

“Good, you followed my directions, for once.”  If he noticed the change in song, he didn’t bring it up.  Richie sticks his tongue out at the other boy, remembering that he needs to keep up his appearances if he didn’t want Eddie to catch onto his crush.  

Eddie takes the bag from him and holds it tightly against Richie’s elbow.  He’s so focused on the job, he doesn’t realize that Richie is staring at him with a spark in his eyes.  Eddie had always been someone Richie thought was good looking but this past year really cemented that fact.  Running had put him in amazing shape and given him a soft tan that complimented his light brown eyes.  A light dusting of freckles had settled on his nose, which Richie thought was just too cute to handle.  

“Quit staring at me like I have three heads asshole,” Eddie muttered under his breath.  Richie quickly looked away and focused on the ugly brown tiles of the floor.  He clears his throat, trying to dislodge the brick that has settled there, when Eddie speaks again.  “So, I have a question.”

Richie blinks a few times.  When Eddie says that, it’s rarely good news.

“Momhasn’tgonegroceryshoppingbecauseshethinksshe’sgoingtocatchtheflufromMr.Jonessothere’snofoodinthehousewoulditbeokayificameoverandatedinnerwithyourfamily?”

Richie can barely keep up, Eddie’s speaking so fast.  He holds up the hand that isn’t held down by Eddie’s grip to make him stop rambling.

“Mom loves having you over, you know that.  You never have to ask to come over and eat, you’re always welcome at Casa Tozier.”  Richie grins, which makes Eddie smile.  This causes Richie to head into a gay panic where his brain is no longer connected to his mouth.  “She’s making lasagna tonight if you want to come over tonight or maybe you could come over tomorrow, since then it’ll be Friday and Friday is pizza night.  We could rent some movies or something if you wanted as well.  Make it a whole…” Richie trails off, noticing the odd look Eddie is giving him.  “What?”

Eddie shakes his head, a worried expression set into his features.  He sets the bag down on the counter, taking a deep breath, before turning around with a bright smile on his face.  

“Friday sounds good. Dinner is still at six right?  I’ll pick up some snacks after I get off work tomorrow.”  Eddie smiles, but it does nothing to calm Richie’s nerves.  They had, essentially, just made a date.

“O-okay sounds good.”  Richie nods enthusiastically.  He mentally berates himself.  He’s being extremely obvious and hoping that Eddie doesn’t notice.  Richie clears his throat.  “Don’t forget to tell your mom to leave her window unlocked tonight.  There’s only so long I can stand outside in just my boxers.”  Richie winks, hoping that covers his quickness of breath well enough.  Eddie scoffs and rolls his eyes.

“You’re absolutely disgusting Tozier.”

“You know it, Spaghetti Man.”

[ruthlessnessisyourdesire-archive]

rp guidelines.

Mun is Ash. She/Her. 21+. Ruthless Drama King keeps me prisoner. 

This blog is 21+ Nsfw/smut will not be written with those under 21 years old. I will not write with minors. 

I know there are a lot of rules here now but incidents, past stuff in rp scene kind of made it mandatory for myself to put down. Common sense lacks in some too so sorry it’s so long but ya know. Gotta do what we rpers gotta do. <3

tw: potential for triggering content & subject matter due to crime scene investigations/forensic profiling. strong language expected. he is simply a problematic aggressive character in most verses.

no godmodding. unspoken rule but please do not control my character under any circumstances. if you continue to break this rule however I may have to cancel our thread. only in extreme cases.

Don’t have personal triggers but I will not write my muse forcing themselves on any other muse.

any personal triggers you are uncomfortable with I will not write and vice versa.

multiverse/oc friendly. au friendly: discussion on AU’s are love. same char different mun friendly. duplicates are always welcome. personally I love OC’s and this boy cannot get enough interaction from them ever. just so you know. 

Do not screenshot my posts: ooc, threads etc. It is MY content. I should not have to add this but yes this has happened without my knowledge - at first. 

Unfollowing: If there is something you disagree with, do not favor about my writing, portrayal, muse(s) or views the button is always there. Please soft block to unfollow. I will do the same and quietly if it calls for it. 

PSA: Don’t call 60 Connor. He is not Connor. He is his own person. This sort of trumps the significance I have built for him as an individual entity in my characterization/ headcanons/ personal iteration in a fandom where he is overlooked. Also if you do refer to him as such verbally to his face you consent to the wrath and animosity he will bestow upon you be it verbal or potentially physical. Trust me 60 is not fond of being mistaken for his predecessor. (It’s a pet peeve and I’m sorry lol but they’re two separate people. I mean I write Connor too so bear with me.)

plots are love. let's discuss story, char relationships, just anything really. down for plotted, random prompts and memes. my dm’s are always open. if I don’t respond straight away I’m either not on at the moment or I’m just swamped in drafts. I still want you to drop in tho.

replies may take a bit. this is a hobby. if I take a while it doesn’t mean I don’t want to rp. sometimes I forget, tumblr eats my notifs or I haven’t thought up a decent reply as of yet. please be patient. I always offer the same to my rp partners. also I do get swamped in drafts and asks so this does contribute to my reply speed. TLDR: I am slow af but I want to write with you.

want to drop a thread? we all lose muse, get too busy, overwhelmed at times. it is perfectly OK. when I do thread purges I will always post an update and @ those I am keeping threads with. the number of follows I have it is just easier for me to do it this way.

shipping: will ship with chars but there are some I may turn down depending on personal preference. typically ships with another RK800/RK900 are a no. sibling, platonic, enemies is where I go. some exceptions may apply depending on verse type but his exclusive and only RK800 ship is with @rob0badge . 60 also would like platonic, friend and enemy ships to counter his romantic ships. any and all are appreciated. 

open to smut threads. 21+ very explicit at times depending on verse. 60 is ruthless. fair warning. also smut is not a requirement for romantic ships. if you’re not down for that then 60 is all about the respect of his partner’s wishes.

multiship friendly: winning rk800-60's affection is not easy in the long run. remember he is not easy to get along with. 

Shipping Additions: I WILL NOT ship cross unless it is plotted mutually between all parties. even then I will be selective about it. please respect this. multiverse is a thing and that is what my blog is. it will just be ignored. 

Content Trigger: 60 is very much ruthless despite his fall into deviancy. if you are uncomfortable with intense personalities this may not be the rp blog for you. certain themes will be highly thematic, problematic and even controversial at times. all of these will be tagged accordingly and put under read more for my followers/mutuals. he will be aggressive and hateful depending on circumstances. he is not very nice. however, the mun does not reflect this characterization and is extremely nice to followers. 60 may not share that affinity but the mun has no malicious intent. Only this ruthless boy does.

threads containing 18/21+ material always go under read more. please adhere to all warnings. some subject matter may be unsettling. remember any dark or triggering themes are NOT condoned by me irl. it just needs to be said.

Interactions: non-rp blogs, personals or those not part of current threads: DO NOT REBLOG. this is becoming a problem lately and I really don’t want to be that person but please follow this rule.If you continue to do so you will be BLOCKED. You can like my posts just fine however. In fact it’s welcome! I like to see others enjoying what I write for the ruthless king.

DBH VERSE REQUIRED: It just works better to be able to write adequately and since my muse is from this universe it’s a given. I rarely do crossovers as I feel some just do not work or fit my muse. If I do they are with main mutuals depending on fandom or personal preference.

Mutual Exclusive/RP Blogs Only: This blog is now private. If you follow me and I do the same back it means I want to interact. Otherwise assume I won’t be following back if I haven’t in a week. I have had some odd things come 60′s way and it is why this blog is locked down now.

Follows: If I follow back it means I want to interact with you. If you're a mutual and you still have not interacted with me after several weeks I WILL unfollow. This is nothing against anyone or meant to be unfair/mean spirited. The blog is an rp blog so of course I want to interact with you all. Also I do not just give free follows since this is not a personal blog. 

I would love to follow back depending but if I see no rules or somewhere that states 21 and above for the mun on your blog I won’t. I interact solely with those 21+. I myself am 28 years old. Respect this and don’t lie about your age to me. I have had people lie to me in the past and they’ve been dropped faster then you can shout “Deviant Spotted!”

I reserve the right to unfollow anyone for whatever reason including but not limited to rp politics. Ya gurl not here for rp snobbery or assumptions made. If I become uncomfortable I will soft block to unfollow quietly. I also practice block back. Meaning if I’m hardblocked (which is in anyone’s right who is uncomfortable with my content) I will hardblock back. It’s only fair and honestly it’s a lovely page taken out of one of my waifu’s books.

OOC: If you post a crap ton of ooc posts (I mean plz it’s your blog and your content is yours so go for it) I may unfollow if I cannot blacklist them properly. I mean things that aren’t rp related. This is only in extreme cases. My blog has overwhelmed me so the dash being flooded is something I want to clean up.

Replies: As I have stated in updates on this blog I am super busy and backed up. My reply speed is slower due to lots of drafts and asks. You can remind me but please don’t come at me or try to push me. Muse can be fickle. Some days I have it for a specific verse, others I have it for shorter convos or text threads. I aim to reply to everyone but keep in mind running this blog is not easy and I want it be fun for me. It’s a hobby.  When I have to worry and hide from people this is no longer that. If it continues I will drop the thread completely. Only in extreme cases. 

Pressuring: Do not come into my inbox on anon passive aggressively asking when I will reply to threads. If you honestly want to remind me like a normal person my dms are open to mutuals only. Do not guilt me into rping. If you pressure and attempt manipulating me you will be blocked. This has happened and I will not put up with it. 

Please reblog any memes/prompts from the source and not this blog. I am not an rp source or creator of these. If you continue to do this and just harvest my blog for memes without even interacting I will unfollow/block. If you reblog send me one then. If not well do not do it. non-mutuals do not reblog anything at all from this blog. Also I  have to mention some people have used me as a source WITHOUT reblogging from me. Meaning they see the meme and reblog it for themselves as a means of bypassing sending in anything. If we’re mutuals why are you doing this? It will just make me think you do not want to interact.

Asks: Do not reblog asks. Please if you wish to continue make a new post and link back to ask. It just makes my dash a little cleaner and I want to avoid extra asks in the inbox continuing it when we can turn them into convo threads. So please don’t keep sending asks to continue a plot line. Thread it.

IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT HATE & ASSUMPTIONS: If I discover you sending hate on anon to anybody you’re gone. If you send hate to people about what they ship, especially to female muns/muses, you’re gone. I will not tolerate hate of any kind and if I see you talking negatively about any female muse I will soft block you quietly. I just do not want to interact with you. People who assume generalized posts are about them when I follow you will be softblocked as well. Honestly it’s a given that if I’m following it’s not directed at you. I will not put up with assumptions or continue to view it on my dash. Unfollow me, softblock me, etc. It’s not difficult. My comfort levels are important to me as well as yours should be.

I will not  interact with egoists. If I see anything that wigs me out I will just softblock quietly. Elitists go home. I don’t want you here. 

I will never rush or be pushy at my partners. I’m so chill about threads. please take your time. let’s never take the fun out of it. never think you’re taking too long or bothering me. DM’s are open to my mutuals only.

I do not do passwords or send messages of any kind. If I am following you rest assured that I have read your rules. I do this automatically when someone follows me and vice versa since I expect the same. If I’m liking update posts you can consider that me seeing it as well. 

unfollowing/refollowing: Don’t do it on my blog. If you follow and then unfollow but for some reason come back to follow you get blocked from my side. I don’t need the bs or the attention seeking.

Duplicates are amazing but I will be selective who I follow back and interact with. Nothing personal but I have been the victim of theft in the past. It’s an unfortunate thing but my characterization and headcanons for 60 are my own. I have been writing this boy forever even long before I made this blog. I’m highly protective of my ruthless king. He is my baby after all.

softblocks: I remove people by doing this. It could be for any reason to be honest. We never interact, you keep dropping our stuff, show no interest, I don’t see us interacting after all or any number of reasons to make my dash more comfortable. Do not ask me why I did it. That’s my comfort. No hard feelings. Just move on. I don’t have to cater to you. If you don’t like my methods use the unfollow button and leave my blog. Simple enough.

hardbocking/blacklisting: Yes I have done it. Am I going to blatantly broadcast it for all to see? Nope. I am not obligated to explain why I blocked you. Most times you have broken my rules despite me reminding to read them. Other times there are people I just do not want to see and that is my right not to see them. Same goes for you. Block me if you do not like what you see. I will not censor myself, my writing or who I interact with.

ostracizing people in the rpc: If you don’t like who I am interacting with use your blacklist function. NEVER tell me not to interact with them. If I find out you practice this exclusion tactic on others in the rpc I will purge you off my blog no questions or explanation needed. I totally get it. There are people I don’t like. No one is going to like everyone but do you see me telling others NOT to write with them? Hell no because I know for a fact they have done it to me and others love to listen without all sides to a story.

I also drop people who vague in public servers because it’s straight up childish behavior. I also will not follow or interact with anyone who guilt trips, suicide baits or lies with a pity party song and dance. When you’re found out to be lying or telling other people not to interact with somebody in this RPC I want nothing to do with you. Move on. That’s it. 

Drop a like if you made it this far. Whew! No passwords needed. Even if you don’t drop a like it won’t prevent me interacting it’s just nice to see. 

[incandescent-creativity]

Character Creation Tag

I was tagged by two people this morning to do this game, so how could I refuse? Thanks to @sundaynightnovels and @inexorableblob for this!

Neither of you requested an OC but I never talk about Connor on this blog so let’s give him a little love. Or at least a post for his character tag, lol.

1. What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc) ?

I think the first was his relationship with Beth. I knew she needed a friend at Agau Labs, or at least someone who was a bit more human and friendly than Dr. Agau was. So he was filling a role, basically.

2. Did you design them with any other characters/OCs from their universe in mind?

Well I guess I just answered that--yes, with Beth.

3. How did you choose their name? 

I... don’t really remember. It’s been so long since I created anything new for SOLE that some of the thought processes have been lost to time and memory. 

4. In developing their backstory, what elements of the world they live in played the most influential parts?

Okay here’s the funny thing, Connor didn’t have a really concrete backstory until very recently. I don’t know how many of you were present for the sensitivity situation that went down on my blog recently, but Connor is one of the characters who I’m changing to add more diversity and make the story more relevant.

I’m very grateful to that process for happening, because out of it, and in light of the changes I’m planning to make for Connor, his backstory came together. 

But to answer the question: the element that was most influential was the way climate change (hurricanes, floods, rising sea levels) affect different countries. I don’t have a specific country picked out yet (I’m thinking somewhere S. or Central America, maybe some islands around there? Maybe Cuba?), but it was living through this that pushed him to end up working for Agau. She promised she could fix climate change, and he knows firsthand why that needs to happen.

5. Is there any significance behind their hair color?

After that giant long answer, here’s a short one: nope

6. Is there any significance behind their eye color?

Considering I’m not sure I ever decided on a canon eye color (or if I did, I’ve forgotten)… that’s also a nope

7. Is there any significance behind their height?

Same deal with the eye color--I don’t even know what it is, so nope.

8. What (if anything) do you relate to within their character/story?

Connor really wants to do the right thing in the circumstances he’s in, but it’s difficult to know what that is sometimes. He’s constantly thrown into new situations (with the whole superpowered-children thing), and because I’m a new adult emerging into the world or whatever, I feel that confusion a lot.

9. Are they based off of you, in some way?

I think he might be one OC that isn’t, actually. Or maybe some aspects of him are, like the one I just mentioned, but I wouldn’t go so far as saying he’s based off of me.

10. Did you know what the OC’s sexuality would be at the time of their creation?

I’ve never even thought of it, lol--he’s a secondary character (like a side character, but he plays a fairly major role. So imagine a weird middle grey area between protagonist and side character, and bam). So I haven’t had to think about these things because they haven’t come up in the story before.

If that changes, y’all will be the first to know.

11. What have you found to be the most difficult about creating art for your OC (any form, writing, drawing, edits, etc) ?

Does Connor even have any edits? Oh no. I don’t think he does.

12. How far past the canon events that take place in their world have you extended their story, if at all?

Is this a thing that people do? I mean, I’ve come up with his backstory a little bit, which I guess is “past the canon events” but like... that’s before the canon events. 

After the canon events I haven’t thought about it at all. I have to actually finish the draft to know where those canon events end, ya know?

13. If you had to narrow it down to 2 things that you MUST keep in mind while working with your OC, what would those things be?

Oh, jeez, only two? Um, his new backstory and his loyalty.

14. What is something about your OC that can make you laugh?

He was in charge of overseeing Beth’s workout sessions (Agau wanted her to be physically fit to improve her health and stability as a subject) and I like to imagine him and Beth being dramatic and exaggerating their groans of exertion and sore-ness and mocking the exercise video ladies.

15. What is something about your OC that can make you cry?

He sends home as much money as he can to help his family still living in impacted areas of Cuba(? again, subject to change) to try and help support them now that he’s succeeded with a stable job in America.

16. Is there some element you regret adding to your OC or their story?

Not really. On the contrary, I’m excited about the changes.

17. What is the most recent thing you’ve discovered about your OC?

As weird as this may sound because he’s been around for like... four years, I just figured out his backstory. That I’ve talked about at length in this post.

18. What is your favorite fact about your OC?

He calls Beth “kiddo” and I love it

[lycorogue]

Who Wants to Meet My OCs? (Part 3b – Glitches Reworks)

Who’s ready for part two (er... of part 3...)?

If you’ve missed it, I’m doing a series to introduce everyone to my main OCs (and no, I’m TOOOOOTALLY not doing this to procrastinate on writing my fanfics... why do you ask?)

In Part 1, I introduced the series, what I wanted to do with it, and gave some insight on the real world inspiration for my two worlds:

Gyateara

Glitches

Then, in Part 2, I talked about the IRL inspiration for my Gyateara characters:

Amara Yori

Natalie

Connor

Jolene Crisslebalm

The first half of this third part of the series - Part 3a - I talked about how characters are created for the Play-by-Post RP X-Future; the game that birthed Glitches. I also talked about the inspiration for my main four truly original characters: my husband’s character Chayse, and My Girls: Lia, Willow, and Trish.

In this final part of the introduction series, I’m going to talk about the adult characters of Glitches, the X-Men/Marvel canonical characters they were derived from, and how I have started altering them to create original variants to use for Glitches.

If this sort of thing strikes your fancy, feel free to read about these characters below the break. If you’re more interested in the actual individual character bios, the first one will be up next Sunday. Catch ya then!

Marvel Canon Reworks:

The next series of characters were all originally canon characters for the X-Men comics. They are all significant for the X-Future characters, and therefore would need an original counterpart for Glitches. I have yet to figure out anyone’s last names....

Matteo

Emily

Ryder

Keahi

Cody

Ignatius “Iggy”

Ready to find out who they were originally?

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Matteo

In X-Future, after Xavier dies in The Reaping, Kitty (Pryde) LeBeau and James “Logan” Howlett take over as the headmistress and headmaster of the school. Wolverine has a strong presence in X-Future because of that, and also because of family created by some of the players. Now, I don't have the IP for any of Wolverine's children/grandchildren/clone's children... (it gets complicated...), but I like the idea of Wolverine being Kitty's foil. A sort of Magneto to Kitty's Professor X. So Wolvie needed an overhaul.

Matteo is half-Puerto Rican, half-African American. His Latino features are more dominant though. And, honestly, the only real reason I thought of including the half-African American part was because it was a suggestion of a friend. His character Lucas is the son of Wolverine's clone X-23. Back when I was first thinking of creating Glitches, this friend was very much involved in helping me figure out what parts of X-Future should make the cut. We jointly reworked Lucas slightly so that he is instead a kid whom Matteo rescued from government experimentation. Lucas was Black, and so my friend thought having Matteo be at least half-Black would help Lucas see a connection that would lead him to trust Matteo and bond with him. A sort of Bruce Wayne/Dick Grayson sort of dynamic.

Said friend of mine sort of went radio-silent after moving a few states away, and so I no longer feel comfortable using Lucas in Glitches. Therefore, I'm not sure if I should just revert Matteo back to full Puerto Rican. It's still up in the air.

I needed him to have the feral personality and physical durability that Wolverine has, but he's now gruff and hardened less because of what had been done to him, but because his younger sister was killed in government experimentation. He is NOT a fan of humans and Glitches (my word for mutants) cohabiting. He no longer has the claws, but takes Logan's begrudging paternal personality and cranks it up a few notches.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Emily

Kitty “Shadowcat” Pryde, as mentioned above, is the headmistress of the Institute, and she's Chayse's very involved mother. I couldn't leave her out if Chayse was transitioning into Glitches. So, she became Emily. Since Chayse has both parents' powers in equal parts, it was a touch easier to manipulate both Shadowcat and Gambit so that Chayse still had the same power set, but the Glitches version of his parents SHOULD be different enough not not be blatant rip-offs.

I started off by giving Emily Gambit's powers, sorta. Instead of Gambit's ability to create kinetic energy, Emily can MANIPULATE kinetic energy. Not only can she build up or create kinetic energy out of potential, she can also instantly pull kinetic energy out of an object in order to drop it back into potential energy. This means, for instance, if she were to catch a ball, she wouldn't need to follow through with her arm; it moving with the kinetic energy transferred from the ball once it's stopped in her hand. Instead, her skin simply absorbs the kinetic energy and the ball stops instantly, as if it were gently lobbed over to her. Likewise, if she concentrates, she can make her skin impenetrable: instantly withdrawing the kinetic energy from things such as bullets, cars, blades, etc., before it can puncture or otherwise injure her skin. No skin injuries also tends to mean no internal injuries.

Of course, the main use of this kinetic manipulation is the way Gambit uses it: adding or building up kinetic energy in an object. This can be used to add force to an object, such as hitting harder with a bat or bo staff without added effort, jumping higher or running faster, or building up enough energy the object explodes. Emily and Chayse also figure out how to use the kinetic energy very similarly to The Flash from the DC comics. Namely, build up enough kinetic energy within their own cells that they vibrate fast enough to pass through other particles. This makes them intangible and capable of phasing through solid objects. It takes a LOT of practice to keep their feet particles on top of the ones that make up the floor/ground. Even more practice allows for “air steps” where they can actually climb the particles that make up the air itself. This brings things back full-circle to Kitty's phasing powers.

I have been so focused on Emily's backstory, ideals, and new powers, so I don't really have a mental image of her that is vastly different than Kitty Pryde's. I still need to work on that. The only real big thing is that Emily has eyes similar to Gambit: unnatural colored irises and sclera. Normally, Emily has the naturally occurring white sclera, and magenta irises. When she's using her powers, however, the magenta bleeds into her sclera. That's it. That's all the physical description I have thus far...

Personality wise, however, she is much more stern and focused than Kitty is shown in most canonical iterations.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ryder

Gambit is just as much of an involved parent as Kitty, so it's only natural that if Kitty has to become Emily, then Remy becomes Ryder. My biggest problem, though, was how to make a suave, Cajun, con-man with powers NOT feel like THE Cajun: Remy “Gambit” LeBeau himself. Granted, not having the ability to blow things up helps, but there's so much more to Gambit than just that.

I wanted to keep him suave, a reformed con-man, White with a non-American accent, and have a love of play cards. That's just TOO Gambit to not include. At the same time... it's SOOOOO Gambit to NOT be recognizable. So, I started off by changing the Cajun accent to one I find equally sexy: Australian. Next, Ryder is more a con-artist than a con-man. More of a manipulator than a thief. He still loves his cards, but he's more likely to play Three Card Monty with them than blow you up with them.

One of the side-effects to Gambit's kinetic powers is the “accidental telepathic manipulation.” He may not even realize he does this, but Gambit can mess with the kinetic energy WITHIN SOMEONE'S BRAIN! He can make certain parts of the brain fire off, making his target much more susceptible to believing his lies, manipulation, and over-all charm. Gambit also always has a kinetic shield around him that continuously shifts erratically. This makes it extremely difficult for telepaths to break through the kinetic field and attack Gambit's mind. Effectively making him highly resistant to telepathic attacks and/or manipulation/suggestion.

So, I figured I'd take this commonly overlooked part of Gambit's powers, and make it Ryder's main mutation. He has a “silver tongue” and has the telepathic ability of verbal suggestion, manipulation, and hypnosis.

Ryder looks like a normal human, albeit a gorgeous one. He has brunette hair instead of Gambit's usually auburn, and he has intense “baby blues” that helps him hold eye contact, which elevates his powers. I don't have much more by way of physical description.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Keahi

On the one hand, Keahi is a major rework of her canon counterpart. In the comics, Amara “Magma” Aquilla is a blonde haired, blue eyed, White girl from the Roman-like society of Neo Roma. They wear togas still and everything. The Amara from X-Future is the version we see in “X-Men: Evolution” in which she's just a typical Brazilian girl of tan skin and brown hair and eyes. I shifted her again so that Keahi is Hawaiian. A bit of a change.

On the flip-side, you can only do so much with “woman who can manipulate tectonic plates and magma, can create fireballs, is immune to fire/lava/breathing in ash, and transforms into a humanoid walking ball of magma.” Lia has all of those powers, so her mother has to have them. Which means I can't really do much with Amara's powers to alter them for Keahi.

Since Keahi doesn't actually show up all that much in Glitches – ya know, since she's MIA – I didn't spend terribly too much time on her. I still need to sit down and figure her out a bit.

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Cody

Jamie “Multiple Man” Madrox is too much of a helicopter parent to not have him follow Lia over into the Glitches rework. The main reason he could be a helicopter parent to such an extreme is his ability to create duplicates. That way he can literally always be with Lia, except for when she needs privacy, such as when she's in the bathroom and/or changing.

In Glitches, Jamie is now Cody, a man who can still create clones of himself out of fresh drops of his own blood. Slightly different than Jamie's impact-created duplicates. The funny thing, though, is for someone whose powers requires bleeding, he's as Edge Lord as a middle-aged man with diabetes. Cody gets viciously protective of those he loves, so he can get some of that badassery his comic counterpart has, but... it's not wholly evident.

In order to use his power, I had Keahi design a special wedding band for her husband. It's similar to (Spoiler alert?) Annie's ring from “Attack on Titan.”

It has a spike hidden inside it that Cody can flick out to puncture or slash his skin whenever he needs blood in a hurry. Normally, he does keep a sleeve of sterilized sewing needles in his pocket, and pricks his fingers on those, but the wedding band is used in a pinch, and has helped him in the past.

Cody still needs some more work as well, but his build is mostly “generic over-protective dad.”

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Ignatius “Iggy”

Iggy started his life as St. John “Pyro” Allerdyce, aka: Devon's father. I was actually largely inspired to create Iggy after watching the anime “K.” Specifically, Iggy is largely designed after the Red King Suoh Mikoto. I mean, look at this guy!

(Sorry, I no longer have the artist credit after my computer crashed. If you know who put this together, please let me know.)

(Same deal; the file I had that listed where I found this fanart got corrupted when my computer crashed. Please let me know if you recognize the artist)

(There's just something about a fit man juuuuuuuust barely showing off his stomach that is just so yummy for me.)

Anyway... Throw in a little Billy Idol and flame-ombre hair, and you have the basic aesthetic for Iggy.

Iggy's personality is more manic than Pyro's. He can be calm and calculated, but also be enraged out of nowhere and go on a rampage; the same qualities his protégé Trish possesses. I wanted Iggy to have a “sexy British-derived accent” still, and with the red hair, I figured: go Irish. So Iggy is an Irish immigrant. The Brotherhood is now a street gang that Iggy turned into a terrorist group. So... again, semi-inspired by Suoh from “K.”

He still has the power to manipulate flame, without the ability to create it. However, there are so many fire manipulators/pyrokinetics throughout pop culture that I'm hoping Iggy doesn't feel like a Discount Bin Pyro.

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In the end, there's not much that I've really done with these character re-works yet, but you'll get to meet them further in later posts.

Until then, thank you for taking this time to see a broad look at my character creation process. If you have any notes on how I can make these characters more distinct from their canon counterparts, feel free to drop me a DM or something.

Thank you, and I’ll see you guys again next week for the first of my individual character profiles. I’m going to start with the “most vocal”: Willow.

[brightbeautifulthings]

The Switch by A.W. Hill & Nathanael Hill

"And it occurred to me, standing there in that bleak, cavernous space, that nobody is ever just one thing: villain or hero, dirtbag or prince. If the multiverse was about choices, and all possible choices were being made, then we might be all those things and everything in between."

Year Read: 2017

Rating: 3/5

Context: I received a free e-copy through NetGalley from the publishers at Curiosity Quills Press. The whole time I was reading this book, I was thinking it sounded exactly like something my friend Roberta at Offbeat YA would like. Then I looked closer and saw that it was a Curiosity Quills Press book, and I knew she would! I highly recommend reading her review, since she's much more qualified to speak about this genre than I am.

About: When Jacobus and his friend Connor discover a massive switch inside an old red house, they feel compelled to pull it and see what happens. At first, they think nothing has changed, but when Jacobus gets home, he realizes that he and Connor have been transported into an alternate world. It's almost exactly like the old one with a few unsettling differences, and Jacobus continues seeking out switches and catapulting himself into alternate worlds as he tries to get home.

Thoughts: This is almost a totally new genre for me. I don't read a lot of science fiction (unless it says Christopher Pike on the cover), and I don't believe I've ever read a book that directly engages multiple worlds theory. I can't speak to whether this is an original interpretation of the idea or not, but I can say that the writing itself is quite good and that the Hills do a nice job keeping the science on a level that's accessible to the average reader. I never felt like I was in so far I couldn't understand, although occasionally it seems like there are a few too many concepts introduced to really do them justice. There's only about a paragraph on entanglement before Jacobus's inner monologue moves on to other things, and I would have liked to see the novel try to tackle one or two of those in more depth.

The characters are good; they're more interesting and unique than a lot of mainstream fiction, and while I don't have a lot of strong feelings about Jacobus (that happens with narrators), I really like his companions. Gordon and Mose are clever and brave, and Jemma is strong and coolheaded. For some reason, Gordon's attachment to his catcher's uniform really struck a chord with me. He's been traveling through worlds for an incomprehensible amount of time; I'd want something that made me feel protected too, and it does a lot to demonstrate the characters' vulnerability. Of all of them, he was my favorite. I never could resist a smart character.

The only problem I had with the novel is, I think, inherent in its type. I get tired quickly of a universe where anything can happen, and I like my stories with more limitations. Things are defined, in part, by their limitations, and things are less interesting when anything can happen. I also got weary of all the scenery changes as the characters hopped worlds, and I could have done with one or two fewer of those. It's hard to establish a setting when the characters are constantly moving on (a lot like a road trip novel, and you know how I feel about those), and without a consistent setting, it's difficult to feel grounded in the novel. I feel like the Hills try to counteract this with consistent characters and the similarities among the worlds that keep resurfacing, and it works to some extent. I never felt like I was in a totally nonsense-reality like Alice in Wonderland, but it wasn't quite to my tastes either.

This isn't the the kind of book where everything is wrapped up neatly at the end, and there are many questions left unanswered. The book has thematic closure though, and more than that, it's a rather smart novel that intelligently entertains a lot of interesting concepts. I'm okay with some open-endedness that leaves room for the authors to return to this world, should they ever want to. As far as forays into science fiction go, I think The Switch falls on the better end.

[selfshipstuff]

Thanks to @sketchy-galaxy​ for the ask! Here’s my answer for Question 1 of the voice ask meme, which was as follows: 

“Recall how long I’ve known my f/o(s) and how I discovered them/their source material.” 

I’ll put a transcript of my rambling under the cut. 

00:00 - 00:35 - Um... hi. So... for question number 1-- which is about how long I’ve known them and how I discovered their source material-- I’m thinking I’ll start with Hunk, since, Starr, you’re the one who asked and I remember that we bonded a little bit over... um... being with Hunk and Lance respectively-- and Lotor, of course, in your case as well. 

00:36 - 01:34 - Um... Hunk, I met in... 2016, I wanna say? So, it’s going on... 3 years now? Or I guess it is 3 years now, 'cuz I met him... towards the end of 2016. And, I mean... with Voltron... I was introduced to that by-- well. It being so popular on Tumblr. I’m not quite as into Voltron as I was at the time? But... he’s still really special to me.  Obviously, I mean, [laughing] you never really,, [shaky breath] stop loving someone when you love them that much. But... [long pause, awkward laugh] Anyway! Next!

01:35 - 02:28 - Um... mmh. With... Adrien, from... Miraculous Ladybug-- um, Miraculous is another one of the ones that I discovered through Tumblr. Um, it was really fun though, because I’ve always had, like, a soft spot for French, and, um... French culture and France in general, so it’s really cool that there’s this show that’s focused on like, superheroes, and magic, and France, all three of which are like extremely fun to me. And... I don’t really remember when I started watching Miraculous, but I think it was a little bit before or after I started watching Voltron, so probably also around that 2016 area. Mmmh...

02:30 - 04:09 - And then... with the Hitachiin twins, Hikaru and Kaoru-- um... I could be saying all of their names with the proper, um, accents, but... I... don’t think it would sound good, and I am not confident enough to be recorded [laughing] saying them that way. [deep breath] Um, so, Adrien, Hikaru, and Kaoru it is, rather than all the accented ones. But, with the twins, I, um... they,,, have been around for me for [chuckling] a lot longer than a lot of the others have. Because I’ve liked them since I first watched the anime-- um, it’s Ouran High School Host Club, for anyone who doesn’t know, I guess, although it’s pretty... it’s a classic, I guess, so most people would know, I think. Um... [clears throat] when I first watched it, I was in middle school... so that was probably... um... I wanna say... 7th grade? 8th grade, something like that? So... I graduated this past year, it’s 2019... um... [long silence where I’m basically doing the math lady meme] I wanna say 20...12, 2013? Something like that, but it’s been a while. Um... [laughs sheepishly] 

04:10 - 05:00 - Aaand... then there’s... Krel, who’s really, relatively new, but [chuckling] I love him so much. Um, he’s from 3Below-- Tales of Arcadia-- it’s the second installment in the Tales of Arcadia series, it comes after Trollhunters. Um... I had been meaning to watch Trollhunters... since I started seeing content for it on Tumblr as well. Um... [weird throat noise rip sorry skksjkj] but... I had been putting it off for a while? That’s the case with like, all of them, by the way, that I discovered on Tumblr. Um, I started watching Trollhunters around the time that 3Below was released? So I wanna say... 2016, 2017 as well. 

05:01 - 06:32 - Umm... then there’s Stardew Valley, which I also discovered partially through Tumblr, partially through my boyfriend, who plays as well? He-- his favorite is definitely Shane, um, mine is... Sebastian, although I love [chuckles] all of them... a lot. Um... Demetrius can go eat dirt, but-- maybe some of those like... mushrooms that he put in my,, stupid,,, cave on my property, but... um... I don’t think any of them are poisonous, unfortunately. RIP to anyone who likes Demetrius, but I’m better. [deep breath] UM... [pause] now I feel bad, I shouldn’t’ve said that, that’s mean. But anyway, um... dang... I wanna say Stardew Valley I started playing, errmm... late 2016, early 2017? I know that seems to be, like, a really... popular time for a lot of my-- my babes, but like... I don’t... know why that is. I have a really poor internal clock, so I probably am just like, not remembering the timing properly. Um... but I would say that’s probably about the time that I started playing Stardew Valley and met Sebastian. 

06:33 - 08:32 - Um... [long pause] let’s see. Then... this is getting into... the... not super current territory, but like, still like, “I love you, please be on my list”? Y’know, that kind of area? Where you’re like, [high voice] “I’m not posting about you, but I still love you, I promise.” Um... Cisco from The Flash, I started watching The Flash, I wanna say, 20...17...? Like, mid-2017, I think, and I loved him like right off the bat. He was my favorite character, episode 1 of season 1, and... that has like, not changed, at all. [laughs, then settles down] They did him dirty, I was so mad about all of his, like, canon love interests? ‘Cuz like, they did him so dirty, poor baby... um! [laughing] That’s kind of off-topic though. Um-- then... there’s also... oh. How I discovered The Flash-- um. I mean, honestly? It’s just because the DCU is so, like... I guess... it’s so big, in pop culture, and I hadn’t really watched the MCU or DCU movies or shows? Until like, really recently. So I started trying to catch up to it, so that’s kind of how that happened. I’m all caught up on The Flash through season 5 now, but... for a while, I wasn’t. Um... but anyway. 

08:33 - 09:47 - Next is... let’s go with Connor. Connor Murphy, from Dear Evan Hansen. Um... this is, as you can tell, a [laughing] popular theme throughout all of them, but Dear Evan Hansen is another one that I discovered through Tumblr. Um, it was kind of difficult...? To get to the source material, because... as,, anyone who’s ever been into musicals knows,,, um,,, ya gotta... ya gotta watch those bootlegs. But they’re not like... super legal... [wheezing in laughter] so it involves,, some, like... lowkey piracy... um... I-- technically-- yeah, not technically. Completely, 100%. But it’s worth it. He’s a Boy. He’s so relatable. I’m gonna say 2016 for that as well, but probably af,,ter,,,, I watched,,, Voltron? I wanna say..... um, actually, maybe 2017, that’s probably more accurate. 

09:48 - 10:29 - Um. At this point, I’m just reading down my-- my actual F/O list, um, on my blog, [collapses into laughter] because,, I don’t,,, actually have the capacity or the bandwidth to properly keep a list in my head, and... just talk about them all in an organized fashion without something to look at, ‘cuz I’m a very org-- eh, visual organized person, when it comes to like,, how to like, think and talk about things. So... if thess-- (bluh) if this order sounds familiar, that’s why, I’m literally just reading it off of my list. 

(divided this next one into 3 paragraphs bc it’s so long good god--) 

10:30 - 14:47 - Um... next, I’m gonna say-- I’m not even gonna specify which F/Os, ‘cuz there’s like a looot of them from this source material-- but I’m gonna say Homestuck. Um. I discovered it, again, through Tumblr, but also through like...? I dunno if it’s pronounced Quo Tev or Quote V, but that fanfic website we'd all been to when we were like 11. Um-- [laughs] Um, I first discovered it-- or, I guess... um... [deep breath] I don’t wanna say “interacted with it”, because I really didn’t, I kind of just... observed it for the first time,, when I was, I wanna say... 12, or 11, so 2011... 20-- no, 2012 or 20...13, I wanna say, and then I finally read it in the first couple months of 2016. And, I think-- I actually binged it, and... I didn’t,, I’m not like... a very highly motivated person, so I would read them in like short bursts throughout a couple weeks. 

I think I finished it in like 2 weeks, but... I would read it at like... after midnight hours, [laughing] so I would be sitting in bed, in this dark basement, by myself, and I remember reading about when Gamzee canonically was like... off the shits. [bursts into wheezing laughter] And I was,,, so freaked out, ‘cuz I was sitting in this dark basement, at like 3 in the morning, all by myself, reading about this like, killer clown-- I’m not even afraid of clowns, but like, god! What the fuck! [laughs] ... Um-- so I guess, some of the more prevalent, um, folks from Homestuck for me would be Dave and Davesprite-- um. I know that’s like, a really common one,, for Dave, because he’s like That Guy for the series, but for me it’s more like, “Wow! We have a lot of... shared experiences,” and, I mean... I dunno. That’s something to get into some other time. 

But, I mean... I think I’ve liked... Dave, Davesprite... um, Dirk, in like a palerom way, if you’re familiar with the quadrants from Homestuck? Which is basically kind of like, uhhh, “I wanna be your best friend” but like also, comfort, like-- like-- I don’t know, it’s hard to describe. Um... I guess it would be kind of like a queer-platonic partner, if you’re familiar with, um, ace-spectrum language. Um... I also really liked Roxy for a short time, and... Dave,,peta,sprite??? I don’t know how to pronounce their name. Um, I was never really a fan of Jade, to be honest, um... which I know is like... the bad mojo for that fandom, but... it be like that, I apologize. Um..... anyway, let’s move on before I get into the trolls, because that’s a long list that I don’t even have time to touch right now, we’ve already been going for like 15 minutes and I still have more to talk about... and this is just for question one, I apologize, Starr, what ha-- what can of worms have you opened-- [laughs]

14:48 - 17:30 - Um... I guess, next would be... Donnie, from TMNT. Because... because,, ss-- shocker, surprise! I’m,,, very, very pan,,,, very, very not picky when it comes to who I am loving,,, my stupid heart is like “Not human? Not a problem!” Of course, you still have to be able to consent, yadda yadda yadda, no, bestiality is gross, et cetera, et cetera. Um... but like, when it comes to TMNT, that’s one of those things that... I’ve been... aware of, for like, my whole life, because I mean it’s been around since like-- how long now?? Wh,, since like the 19...8...0s...? Something like that? Um-- oh shoot, my sisters are home. Oh well. 

Um, Donnie is definitely a Main when it comes to the four of them, um, shortly thereafter followed by Mikey, and then it’s Leo, and then I also... I-- I mean, I like all four of them, in separate ways, but like... Raph is definitely, like... Raphael is kind of on the bottom for me? Which I know is kind of odd and uncommon in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fandom, but... that-- I appreciate that he’s [laughs] really passionate,, but I have a hard time,, with, um... people who have, like... quick tempers. Um... due to like, past experiences. So... that’s, um... [long pause] Anyway, I started watching based-- uh, with the 2012 series. Um, I haven’t seen the new one yet-- with the 2D animation, where they’re all different types of turtles? Um, I did watch the 20...14/2016 movies, um... Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and TMNT: Out of the Shadows-- those were really good as well. Um... [huff] and that’s that! I live by that.

17:30 - 19:30 - So, next I guess would be... Merlin, from the show of the same name that aired on BBC. Umm, I don’t actually remember when I watched this? I wanna say 20...14, 2015... probably mid-2015. [burps] ‘Scuse me-- um... I mean... pretty much immediately, I liked him. Um, like, first five minutes of the show, I was immediately like, [surprised voice] “Oh! I love him! He’s mine now.” Um... I discovered him through, um... I mean, general internet culture, same as Homestuck. I did, uh-- kind of find them through Quo Tev-slash-Quote V, however the hell you wanna pronounce it, as well as Tumblr, and like Ao3. Um-- ‘cuz y’know, um, Merlin and Arthur are a really popular ship, so... I did see a lot of that-- I actually do kind of like that ship, but personally, I’m also kind of like, [high voice] “Mmmmmmmm... Arthur,,,....... he’s mine. Go have fun with Gwen.” [pauses, then laughs] ... Not gonna lie though... Morgana before she went, like... crazy, crazy evil? Was like... highkey eyes emoji. And then she went over to the dark side ‘cuz they had cookies or whatever and I was like [high voice] “Mmmmm, I don’t like that.” ‘Cuz,, I’m not, like,, super, like,,,,.... no tea, no shade, y’all who have villain F/Os are super valid, but that’s for me-- [bursts out laughing]

19:31 - 21:08 - Um-- [long pause] And then I guessss... have I mentioned Peter yet? Um,, Spider-Man-- I mean, shh, I totally didn’t just reveal his identity, um-- but... I’ve,, always really liked Spider-Man?? Like, he’s always just kind of been one of my favorite heroes. Um. Even when I hadn’t really watched much of the MCU or DCU, I think Spider-Man was up there with Wonder Woman for me. Um... I still haven’t watched,,, like, anything other than the Tom Holland ones-- [laughter] I do own them, I just,, haven’t watched them-- [collapses into laughter again] Um,, I think,,, [groaning] I don’t know, I just love him... I watched, um... like, I watched... what’s it called? Um-- Homecoming. When it came out. Uh, I saw it in theaters, and I don’t remember when that was, but... I did-- I pretty much immediately was like [high voice] “Mmm, boyfriend material.” So-- I mean, I discovered that through mostly popular culture and cultural osmosis as well, um, but Peter Parker’s been like a childhood one for me as well, I guess. 

21:09 - 23:51 - And then there’s also... uhhh... one second, I’m thinking-- oh. [snaps fingers] Right. I have the list. Right in front of me. Um, Ratchet, from Ratchet & Clank, the 2016 game-- um, I actually haven’t played any of the other ones in the series. Um... I haven’t,, I’m not super familiar with the franchise? I know that he has, like, a canon girlfriend at some point who I’m like... not super comfy with. [starts laughing] Um,,, content for her keeps showing up on my dashboard and I’m like “I don’t want these,,,” But, um... so, I discovered it... through, um. Well. 

Unfortunately, I discovered it through my dad, who I have a very bad relationship with, but he-- at the time, um, he hadn’t disowned me yet, and I was over at his house, because I was-- it was like, visitation weekend. So, I was on the PlayStation, and he had bought Ratchet & Clank in like a weird attempt to like... bribe me with,, affection, or something. And, I guess... I just like... I played it. ‘Cuz like, there wasn’t anything better to play, and I just immediately like fell in love with the game. The graphics are really good, um... the game was fun, it was easy to play once I got a hang of it, which is [snickering] really good because I’m not very good at video games [full-on laughing] even though I love them. Um...

And I mean, that was kind of more of a gradual thing for me. It wasn’t like a [snaps fingers] “I love him,” it was more like [surprised] “... Oh. Ohhh, no,,, I’m starting to love him!” Which is actually kind of strange for me, because it’s kind of like... slow-burn things are less common for me. Um, like normally I’ll at least have like a crush at first, but... for Ratchet, it was really more like... “Ohhh my... Suddenly, I Am Starting to Have Some Affection.” Like, in the middle of playing the game, and it was kind of hilarious. Um... this was, I wanna say, 20...17, 2018. So, more recent. 

23:52 - 25:30 - And then, of course, um, Sans Undertale. Because who doesn’t love The Boy? Ummm... obviously, discovered Undertale through, um... Tumblr, also my boyfriend had it, so I got to watch him play it a bit, and he talked about it as well. Um... popular culture, because everyone was talking about it, it was on YouTube quite a bit, um, and at the time, I was pretty active watching YouTube videos-- I don’t really anymore, but I did at the time. Um... honestly? I never finished the game myself. It’s-- I still have it, it’s like, on my computer, I just haven’t touched it since I like... first got it. I played it for like a couple weeks, but I already kind of knew everything that happened, and I just kind of... didn’t?? Anymore?? So I’m real-- I’m like-- Before I even played the game, though, I was already like “I love him!” because... I mean... I’mma keep it real with you, Chief... I saw a lot of Undertale content on Tumblr and Ao3... and I was just like “Well. I guess I love him now!” Um, I wanna say that was-- I don’t remember when Undertale came out, but I wanna say it wassss... half a year after it came out? Maybe... closer to a year, somewhere around there. 

25:31 - 27:10 - Um... I think those are pretty-- oh! [snaps fingers] Y’know what, I know who I’m forgetting. Um... I also, um, recently started watching Supergirl, and, like, immediately, I loved Winn. He’s so good. Um-- I started watching Supergirl probably... June, July, August of this year? So, it’s very recent, but [shaky voice] oh my god,, I love him. This is again, through like, pop culture, um, it being part of the DCU, being how I discovered it. Um, and also I saw some stuff about lesbians on Tumblr-- um-- I do really like how they handled Alex’s, um... journey through that. And then, I mean... I don’t think I’m gonna say much more, [laughs] ‘cuz I’ll just,, keep going, and I’ve already been recording for like 27 minutes? And I’ve gotten off-topic for probably about half of that. 

So, that’s question number one... if I,, left out any?? That you wanted to hear about, I can do another one, but I think... this should be good for now. 

[dailyconradricamora]

Out Gay Actor Conrad Ricamora On His Hits “Here Lies Love” & ABC’s “How To Get Away With Murder”

Last week, SGS had the opportunity to catch up with Conrad Ricamora from ABC’s hit show, “How to Get Away With Murder.” He dishes with Teriyaki Temple (aka David Luc Nguyen) about working opposite Viola Davis, the hazards of Grindr, breaking down stereotypes for Asian actors, creepy stalker moments and so much more…including his current project that brings him to the Emerald City, his starring role in the hit musical at Seattle Repertory Theatre, Here Lies Love written by David Byrne and Fatboy Slim.

Teriyaki Temple/David Luc Nguyen: Welcome to Seattle, Conrad! What brings you to our neck of the woods and are you enjoying your visit so far? 

Conrad Ricamora: I’m loving Seattle and everything it has to offer.  I am currently doing HERE LIES LOVE at Seattle Repertory Theatre. (The musical) started at the beginning of March and (was recently) extended to June 18th.  We are doing 8 shows a week.  There are still some tickets available. I know that it was selling out, especially for the Thursday, Friday, Saturday night shows. But there are still some tickets available.

TT: With such a busy schedule have had much opportunity to check out some of Seattle’s attractions? 

CR: I’ve been down to the (Pike Place) Market a couple times…got the grilled cheese at Beecher’s, which is my favorite. Ate at this place called “Sushi Kashiba, I guess, which is one of Shiro’s restaurants.

TT: Can you tell me more about about “Here Lies Love?” I read somewhere that you sing as well.      

CR: “Here Lies Love” is musical written by David Byrne who is the lead singer of Talking Heads.  Fatboy Slim also did some of the music, too. The show is about the the rise and fall of Imelda Marcos where I play Ninoy Aquino, who’s the Filipino revolutionary leader that helps to try to overthrow the Marcos’ dictatorship.  It really focuses on the politics and the human rights abuses that happened in the Philippines.

TT: Do you think themes in this show echoes what’s going on in our current political climate here in United States?

CR: Yeah. I think it– David had the idea to write a show about powerful people that live in a bubble and are out of touch with what regular, normal people are going through.I mean, if that doesn’t echo what’s going on right now, I don’t know what does. And also shows what happens when powerful people try to be above the law and especially this week, which is really just blowing my mind about how relative this show is right now.

TT: Do you call LA home usually, or where do you call home?

CR: Yeah. Both LA and New York. Right now, like I’ll go straight from here to LA once we start shooting in July. But New York…I’m still doing a lot of work there as well so I’m kind of back and forth between those two.With co-star Jack Falahee who plays Conrad’s onscreen romantic interest on ABC TV’s “How To Get Away With Murder”

TT: Nice!  Let’s talk, How To Get Away With Murder.  Your character, seems like he is the moral compass of the show. You’re surrounded by some pretty dark characters. Do you see Oliver being influenced by his peers? Or do you think that he might help them, raise them out of moral ambiguity or–?

CR: Well, I definitely think he’s being drawn to the dark rise.  yeah, I think that he’s making the choice to go over to the dark side a little bit more just by asking for a full-time job with Annalise.And he’s stepping out of his own boundaries that he sets for himself as a person. Because of his relationship with Connor, I think that whether that turns into something as dark as being complicit in a murder [laughter] which he’s not quite there yet, although wiping the cell phone clean and kind of helping in that way is– he didn’t really know what will be.He was just helping Annalise. He didn’t really know what he was doing at the time, but yeah. We’ll see how much more proactive he gets in that area, of covering up and being a little– just walking that fine line of being ethical and being a criminal [laughter].

TT: Looking forward to seeing how your character and the show develops.  I read that you are of, I believe, Filipino and German descent?  

CR: Yeah. Well, my mom is white. She’s from New Hampshire and my dad was born in the Philippines so I’m, yeah, half and half.   

TT: Do you think it’s harder to be an Asian-American or mixed Asian-American in Hollywood?

CR: Well, I don’t really know. It hasn’t been for me so far [laughter]. I know that there’s definitely a lack of representation of well-rounded Asian characters….historically that’s been…we’ve been seen as comedic relief and kind of like the clowns and not been seen as fully realized human beings with sex drives, and complicated emotions, and complicated thoughts.  We’ve been kind of portrayed as cartoons, for the most part, in history. And I think that’s changing a lot now. I mean, I think there’s still a long way to go especially when you hear of projects that are casting white people as Asian characters.That’s especially frustrating. I mean, you would never hear of– and there’s not as much outrage about that happening as it is when a white person would try to play a black person. And so it’s kind of like we still have a long way to go for that kind of equality to catch up. But I think we’re moving in the right direction. We’re just not there yet.

TT: Are you referencing Tilda Swinton from Doctor Strange where she plays the Master?

CR: I heard about it. I haven’t watched it or don’t know it well enough, don’t know the project well enough to comment on it.I heard Emma Stone was getting cast in “Aloha” as a half-Vietnamese person [laughter].

TT: Oh yeah, I totally see Emma Stone with her red hair and freckles being half Vietnamese [laughter].

CR: So yeah. It’s just like those kinds of things. It’s kind of like, well, can’t you just cast an Asian person? The role is written for an Asian person.There’s plenty of Asian actors that are looking for work. And if we don’t get seen, some producers and people and Hollywood executives say, “We don’t have an Asian star to carry the film.” And it’s like, well, if you don’t let us be seen, then we can’t be a star.”

TT: I agree! I totally hear ya!  

CR: It’s this frustrating cycle of oppression. They’re saying that we’re not stars, but we’re never given a chance to be main characters in– we’re not even allowed to play our own ethnicity sometimes, so– unless it’s a horrendously cartoony version of it. So, I mean, I do think it’s getting better. Like I said, I still think we still have a long way to go.

TT: Let’s talk Stereotypes.  So your character, Oliver, is of mixed Asian decent and he’s very tech-savvy and he’s a gay male who’s HIV-positive.Some critics would say that Oliver reinforces some of the stereotypes that Hollywood portrays about gay men all having HIV and Asians being very smart, techy and nerdy and that all gay Asian men are submissive.  What would you say to those critics and how do you think that your character challenges those stereotypes?

CR: I will say that when I went in to audition for the role, I was the only Asian guy in the waiting room. The guy that went in before me to audition for Oliver was black. The guy that went in after me was white, and so in the breakdown for the character, it wasn’t like they were looking for an Asian guy.They just hired me to do it. And it hasn’t been– I really do feel like I’ve been able to play a really well-rounded character on the show. And a lot of the stereotypes of Asian men being submissive are not at all perpetuated in the portrayal of Oliver or in the way that he’s written.  So I don’t agree with some of the stereotypes. If people say that Oliver is perpetuating any stereotypes, I just don’t see it. 

TT: Agreed.  I also believe that not all stereotypes are bad.  I also think that you are a correct.  Oliver doesn’t take much off of Connor when he is just looking for a late night booty call.  I love how assertive he is (Oliver)  in their relationship. I loved it when you slammed the door in his face in one of the episodes and when you let Connor know who was in charge in the bedroom.  Soooooo, moving to the next topic.   My friends asked me to ask you if you were seeing anyone [laughing]. 

CR: Well, I guess it’s complicated [laughter].

TT: To satisfy my own curiosity.  How does a celebrity like you date?  Do you guys go on Grindr or Tinder or what [laughter]?

CR: No, you can’t really do apps once you have any kind of notoriety because then people are just– you don’t know if people just want to get in touch with you just to– if you’re all of a sudden just some novelty.  So your privacy becomes a lot more– you become a lot more guarded in that regard and rely mostly on just face-to-face meetings, and meeting people through friends, and stuff like that. So yeah, I will say that any type of fame or notoriety has made it much more difficult to date [laughter].

TT: If you were to date one of the handsome many candy from the show, who would you probably most like see yourself pairing up with? Would it be Jack, Charlie, Alfred, Billy, or Matt?

CR: I’m going to jump away from that and say I want to date Viola (Davis)! [laughter]

TT: Hahahah good pivot.   I can’t say I don’t blame you though.  Viola is beautiful and so talented.

CR: She is such a badass to me, and she is sexy and yeah [laughter]. I would skip everyone and jump there [laughter].

TT:  How is it working with her? I mean, did you know her work coming into the project?

CR: Yeah, I respected her immensely as an actor, watching her in Doubt and The Help. I was so excited to be able to act opposite her.  And she’s just the nicest, realest person, and puts everyone at ease on set. Yeah, still, it’s such a joy to work opposite of her.TT: Have you had any weird fan experiences so far?CR: Yeah, when I was doing The King and I, at the stage door a woman that was visiting from another country asked if she could kiss me. And I was like, “Uh, no [laughter].”Yeah, that was probably the strangest thing, just somebody– I was kind of shocked and like, “Wow, that’s bold.”

TT: Who are some of the artists in your current music playlist right now?

CR: Before the show to warm up I listen to Beyonce’s Lemonade album. I listen to the song called– the song “Freedom” and that old George Michael song “Freedom”. I just think a lot of our show has to deal with freedom…freedom for the people. I just feel like that kind of music pumps me up and gets me excited.

TT: So I’m curious. How does a psychology major end up in Hollywood?

CR: I took an acting class in college and then I just kept doing it, and just started doing community theater and found that it was something that I really wanted to do and then it slowly started paying. Then I went back to get my MFA in acting and just kept going. Realized that this was what I wanted to do with my life and just kept doing it.Yeah, I didn’t know– when I was 18 deciding a major it’s like I didn’t really know who I was or what I wanted to do. It wasn’t until my junior year that I started discovering, “Oh. Wait, this is what I want to do.”

TT: That’s awesome. So I think I read you were from– is it Niceville, Florida?  I imagine it’s kind of like growing up in southern Washington, where I grew up. I can’t imagine there is much diversity there?

CR: No, it wasn’t diverse at all. I was one of maybe– I think there were 3 other Asian people in my high school and the high school had close to 2,000 people [laughter] and there were only 4 of us. So it was very not diverse. Very conservative. And we didn’t even have a theater or an arts program. So I wasn’t even exposed to theater or acting or didn’t even know it was possible until I went away to college.

TT: Did you come out when you were still in your hometown? Or how was that process for you?

CR: When I was in undergrad I came out to my best friend, and then slowly just started coming out to my parents and other people.

TT: And how did your parents take it?

CR: Yeah, they took it well. I mean, they were really supportive, and just kind of said that it was okay, and that they wanted me to be who I was, and not try to be what I thought anybody else wanted me to be, or needed me to be. So, I mean, they were just there for me.

TT: So I guess, do you have any other projects coming up? You mentioned in July you’ll be heading back to the set for How to Get Away with Murder. Do you have any other plans in the works?

CR: Yeah, I just shot this indie film that got picked up by Amazon that– I think it’s going to be on Amazon in 2018. It’s called The Light of the Moon and it deals with sexual assault in it, so that just got picked up, but it won’t be available until 2018, so it’ll be a while.

TT: Thanks for time out of your busy schedule to chat with me today and looking forward to seeing more of you and your work in the future.

[imaginingintensely]

10 Books I Read This Year

This was originally going to be a top 10 list, but looking back over my Goodreads ratings I realized that my ratings varied widely depending on my mood when I finished the book. So instead this is a list of 10 books that I read and enjoyed this year. There were a couple of things that affected my reading habits this year: my mental health was not very good, this was the first full calendar year that I have not been studying English, and I started following the Vaginal Fantasy book club online. This meant that I read a lot more Young Adult and Romance novels and tended to choose books for amusement rather than to learn. I have also been trying work against the belief that genre fiction is not “real literature,” which I realized that I had unconsciously assimilated. An interesting side effect of reading more YA and romance was that the majority of the authors I read were women, 72%. Although it is also worth noting that most of these were white women as only 17% of the authors were POC. So, in no particular order, here are the books:

The Hate U Give - Angie Thomas (2017) The Hate U Give tells the story of sixteen-year-old, Starr Carter, as she witnesses her friend being shot by a police officer and deals with the aftermath of the shooting. It explores race, racism, police violence, and media coverage while also taking up issues of class, family, community, and self-discovery. This topical novel does an excellent job of finding a balance between the mundanity of everyday life as a teenager and serious political discourse. Thomas tempers the dark emotionality of grief and trauma with humour and family. This is the kind of Young Adult novel that I wish was around when I was a teenager and believe should be explored in High School English classes.

Yardwork: A Biography of an Urban Place - Daniel Coleman (2017) I took a class from Dr. Coleman, while doing my Master’s degree at McMaster and was interested to see what he was doing in his writing and research; so when this book came out I picked it up. Yardwork: A Biography of an Urban Place is a combination of local history and life writing that tells the story of one specific plot of land, Coleman’s yard in Hamilton, Ontario. Coleman constructs this narrative through conventional historical research as well as oral history and indigenous sacred narratives. Yardwork: A Biography of an Urban Place acknowledges the settler colonial history of the land and attempts to work against western conventions by affording the land and animals as much importance as humans and by giving all source material equal importance. Reading this book made me wish I had got to know Hamilton better while I lived there and want similar books about other places I have lived in. However, it is worth noting that because the book is so place-specific it might not be as captivating for those who have not visited or lived in the Hamilton area.

Throne of Glass (Series) - Sarah J. Maas (2012-) The Throne of Glass series is an epic YA fantasy series that follows teenage assassin Celaena Sardothien as she fights against a growing evil taking over her world. The series has magic, mystery, intrigue, lost heirs, and fae kingdoms. It is a fun and enthralling read and Celaena is a badass heroine. However, the series is not without its faults. There is the usual YA love triangle drama, and I still have not forgiven Maas for killing off one of my favourite characters in the first book solely to provide motivation for Celaena. The first couple of books tend to fall into female exceptionalism, where one woman is exceptional by magic or skill in a world dominated by men and the narrative ignores the continued system oppression of women. However, this does improve somewhat as the series progresses and introduces more female characters and slowly reveals that Celaena is flawed, but willing to grow and change.

Saga (series) - Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples (2012-) I frequently find it difficult to find comics that I like. Often I will appreciate the text but not the illustrations or vice versa. However, Saga written by Brian K. Vaughan and illustrated by Fiona Staples is a beautiful melding of words and images. The series tells the story of two soldiers from opposite sides of an intergalactic war who fall in love and have a daughter, Hazel. Saga is about trying to raise a family and forge and maintain relationships during a conflict. It continually asks the reader whose lives matter and whose stories are worth telling. The illustrations are colourful and stunning and the pacing stretches and compresses time to fit the narrative. I keep lending it to my friends so I thought it was well worth putting on this list. One note though: the series does contain graphic violence and explicit sexuality so if that is not what you are into you may want to give it a pass.

Me, My Hair, and I - ed. Elizabeth Benedict (2015) I got this book as a Christmas gift from my sister two years ago, while I was doing research on hair for my MA. Now that I am done my MA I finally had time to read it. Me, My Hair, and I is an anthology of women’s writing about their hair. Because of the variety of authors, I enjoyed some pieces more than others, but because they were all written by professional writers they were all well done. The topic of hair provides a fascinating lens through which to look at women’s lives and relationships. Many of the stories talked about culture, beauty standards, femininity, sexuality, and mother-daughter relationships. While I thoroughly enjoyed this book, I would have appreciated more entries about body hair and queer hair.

This One Summer - Mariko Tamaki and Jillian Tamaki (2014) This One Summer follows pre-teens Windy and Rose through a summer at their families’ cabins at Awago Beach. The book focuses on their relationships to each other, their families, and the other residents in the small lake community. It is slow, quiet graphic novel that focuses more on place, feeling, and female friendship than plot. As always, Jillian Tamaki’s illustrations are full of life and emotion and depict the Canadian landscape beautifully.

Animal: The Autobiography of a Female Body - Sara Pascoe (2016) Animal: The Autobiography of a Female Body is a combination of British comedian Sara Pascoe’s autobiography and an exploration of evolutionary history. It examines what it means to be a woman in contemporary British culture and the thousands of years of evolution that contribute to women’s experience of their bodies. This book is grounded in Pascoe’s personal experience of her body which makes it funny, moving, and intriguing. Admittedly, Pascoe is a comedian and not a scientist so the science sections of this book are not as strong as the autobiographical section, but they do go some way to complicating how we think of women and inviting the reader to think beyond the present.

Midnight Crossroad - Charlaine Harris (2014) I picked up Midnight Crossroad because I heard about the television series based off of it and wanted to read the books before I tried it. The book is a murder mystery and takes place the small town of Midnight, Texas, which is inhabited by psychics, vampires, fallen angels, witches and all manner of other supernatural beings. A few years ago, I read and enjoyed all of Harris’ Southern Vampire Mysteries, which become the television series True Blood. Midnight Crossroad takes place in the same universe as the Southern Vampire Mysteries and has much of the same humour and small town setting. One major difference is that Midnight Crossroad features a large ensemble cast and switches point-of-view narration between characters, which took me a little while to get used to. I also watched a bit of the television series, and will probably return to it at some point, but I preferred the slow pacing of the book because it fits the small town setting better.

Turtles All the Way Down - John Green (2017) This is YA novelist John Green’s most recent and, in my opinion, best novel. It tells the story of the teenage Aza as she reconnects with an old friend, looks into a mysterious disappearance with her best friend, and struggles with OCD. Green draws on his personal experience with OCD as well as his life as a parent to create a realistic portrayal of mental illness and parent-child relationships. The conversations between Aza and her mom remind me so much of conversations I’ve had with my mom, especially the line “I see the pain on your face and I want to take it from you.” But I think what I liked best about the book was that it does not ascribe to a curative model of mental illness, but instead presents ways of managing and living with it.

Burn for Me - Ilona Andrews (2014) I debated for a while which romance novel to include on this list before deciding on this one. Burn for Me takes place in an alternate reality where a serum was created in the Victorian period allowing humans to develop magical abilities. While the serum was quickly outlawed, the magical abilities became hereditary and magical families began to shape society. Set in a version of the present, Burn for Me follows private investigator Nevada Baylor as she becomes caught up in an investigation into a conspiracy. The novel is fast-paced and entertaining in a way the makes me think it would make an excellent action movie, and of course everyone is attractive. It also has some interesting worldbuilding as it deals with the ramifications of the altered history. However, the book is not unproblematic: the meet-cute between Nevada and the hero, Connor “Mad” Rogan, is him kidnapping her and he continues to act overprotective and hypermasculine throughout the book. Though Rogan does become a more complicated character as the novel reveals his family life, military past, and PTSD. Also, the cover art is just plain bad and not an accurate depiction of the novel.