#congratulations! you've missed the point!
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buddhistmusings · 8 hours ago
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I've seen an uptick in people fantasizing about how they want to punch, torture, or kill Nazis.
And I think it's a good time to revisit what Nazi ideology is really about.
First and foremost, if Nazism is anything, it is antisemitic. When Nazism is homophobic, it's antisemitic homophobia. All Nazism is antisemitic.
And I am definitely not the first to note this, but if your concern about Nazis isn't accompanied by concern about antisemitism (in all its subtle manifestations), you're just not as anti-Nazi as you think you are. You can fantasize about violence all you want - it's not doing anything. Actually do something to help Jewish people - that communicates real understanding of the issue. And if you think you need to separate people into categories of Good and Bad Jew to do it, congratulations, you've missed the point entirely.
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carefulfears · 1 year ago
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thinking about "you have a life" / "i don't know what i have" + "what do you want, dana?" / "i want everything that i should want at this time of my life" + the perceived shame in scully's loss of normalcy... "unlike you, mulder, i would like to have a life" + "do you believe in the afterlife?" / "i'd settle for a life in this one" + "don't you ever want to just stop? get out of the damn car? settle down and live something approaching a normal life?"
her friend ellen saying, "well, first you have to get a life." tara, pregnant with their christmas gift, saying that life before one grew inside her was "somehow...less, just a prelude," while barren dana cries in the kitchen. "i know you and dad were...disappointed...that i chose the path that i'm on."
thinking about how mulder said, "this is a normal life," and how she smiled. (he doesn't know any different). how, in the end, he said, "hey, scully? i know it's not your normal life, but thanks for coming out there with me."
(christmas before quantico, "i guess i'm afraid of making a big mistake. dad thinks i am." and missy's response: "it's not his life, dana.")
her application to adopt emily was rejected: "you're a single woman who's never been married or had a long-term relationship. you're in a high stress, time intensive, and dangerous occupation."
bill's reaction: "sounds like something your partner would say. this isn't about any little girl, dana. this is about you. it's about some...void, some emptiness inside you that you're trying to fill."
and mulder to the judge: "the fact that she can adopt this child, her own flesh and blood, is something i don't feel i have the right to question, and i don't believe anyone has the right to stand in the way of."
(that last christmas with missy before everything: "there is no right or wrong. life is just a path...just don't mistake the path for what is really important in life. the people you're going to meet along the way. you don't know who you're going to meet when you join the FBI. you don't know how your life is going to change, or how you're going to change the life of others.")
and ultimately, it all leads to a leather couch. and after contemplating that sacrifice of normalcy, what she should want, the decisions she could have made, she says, "i once considered spending my whole life with this man...what i would have missed."
she could've been a doctor, like her father wanted. she could've settled down, married waterston, had a normal life, like her friends and brother wanted. but what would she have missed?
"what if there was only one choice and all the other ones were wrong?" / "and all the...choices would then lead to this very moment. one wrong turn, and...we wouldn't be sitting here together."
#i truly believe that what's made this show so lasting and rich to so many generations#is how completely in touch with raw human experience it always was. there was always this kind of bleak undertone of...this is how it is...#and very rarely was it ever overcome or accepted or boldly subverted. it just was.#the pressures and the grief and the traps of abuse and trauma and power structures. this is how it is. this is how it feels.#'people thought the storyline and characters for x-files made it a 'dark' show but i never saw it that way.#i always thought mulder and scully were the light in dark places.'#my favorite quote about the show and why i think it's so comforting. it's the harsh reality of the world#of which mulder and scully are not exempt#but it's also mulder and scully going wherever they are needed with their unending kindness and their perseverance and their passion#and they bring all of those things to each other too. that's why she chose THIS life. despite it NOT being normal.#despite it NOT being what her father wanted for her. despite it NOT being easy. she chooses it over and again#because he is bringing light to dark places and she wants to be where he is and she wants to be doing important work. she wants to be#'on the side of the victim'#and that's rarely supported by societal structures and it's hard. but like she says#what would she have missed??#txf.txt#you people make me crazy when you dismiss her decisions and act like she Ruined Her Life or mulder Ruined Her Life#congratulations! you've missed the point!#all things#emily#dreamland
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jerys · 9 months ago
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how is it okay to call people who simply enjoy a different genre of music than you 'braindead' and stupid. disliking taylor swift's music does not give you the right to be wildly misogynistic about her. disliking her music does not give you the right to rampantly hurl abuse at anyone who does enjoy it. this kind of behaviour makes me so incensed because tell me what other artist gets this level of vitriol thrown at her for just doing her job? what other fanbase - comprised predominantly of young women - gets attacked with such a vicious level of malice? you can claim it's not misogyny but at this point no one's going to actually buy into that
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heartysworld · 2 months ago
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Lovely coincidences // L. Norris x Fem. Reader
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A/N: There was no way I was gonna miss the opportunity and post something about today's events, which, by the way, made me jump out of bed with a gasp at 8am.
W.c: 1.2k
MASTERLIST
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You sit cross-legged on the couch, your phone in one hand and Lando’s head resting in your lap. His curls tickle your fingers as you absentmindedly play with his hair, scrolling through Instagram. Your draft post stares back at you, nerves fluttering in your stomach. The picture is perfect—Lando’s hand protectively resting on your bump, your fingers intertwined, both of you glowing in the soft light of the sunset.
You've been trying to do this all week but always ended up backing out right before you hit the "post" button. Every time it fel as if you were about to expose the most private part of your private life to the public. However, at some point you came to the realization that it's better to do it yourself before a media outlet ratted your secret out first.
The caption reads:
"Plot twist of the year: Lando and Y/N +1 coming soon 🍼❤️."
“Do you think it’s too cheesy?” you ask, looking down at him.
“Cheesy?” Lando scoffs, twisting so he can meet your gaze. “Y/N, the fans love cheesy. And let’s be real—this is huge. They’re going to lose their minds.”
“They already think you’re the chaos driver,” you tease. “Now they’ll think we’re bringing another tornado into the world.”
“Exactly!” Lando sits up, grabbing his phone with a grin. “It’s perfect. Our little chaos baby.” He pauses, looking serious for a moment. “Are you ready, though? This makes it real, you know?”
His sincerity warms you, and you nod. “I’m ready.”
“Alright then,” he says, holding up his phone like he’s at the starting grid. “On three. One… two… three—post!”
The moment you hit post, your phone buzzes like a swarm of bees. Likes, comments, and DMs flood in at a dizzying pace. Lando’s laugh fills the room as he scrolls through the comments.
“Look at this,” he says, showing you Carlos’ reply: “Mini Lando incoming? Poor Y/N. The grid’s not ready for this!”
“Carlos has a point,” you quip, nudging him.
Before you can reply to anyone, Lando’s phone buzzes again. He freezes, a mischievous grin spreading across his face as he reads the notification.
“No way,” he says, shaking his head in disbelief.
“What?”
“It’s Max.” He turns his phone toward you.
You squint at the screen. Sure enough, there it is—Max Verstappen and Kelly Piquet’s baby announcement, posted mere minutes after yours. The picture shows Max and Kelly in a cozy living room, her bump visible under her flowy dress, and the caption:
"Baby Verstappen loading… can’t wait to meet you, little one ❤️."
Your jaw drops. “You’re kidding me.”
Lando’s already dialing Max. The phone rings twice before Max picks up, his calm voice a stark contrast to Lando’s giddy disbelief.
“What’s up, Norris?”
“What’s up?” Lando exclaims. “What’s up is that you just stole our baby thunder!”
There’s a beat of silence, then you hear Kelly laughing in the background. “Oh no,” she says through her giggles. “Did we steal their thunder?”
“Steal our thunder? You drove right through it!”, Lando replies, though his grin betrays his faux outrage.
“Not my fault you have bad timing,” Max says dryly.
Lando groans. “I cannot believe this. First you steal first place on teack, and now you’re trying to win the baby race?!”
“First place is first place,” Max says smugly.
The banter continues until you grab the phone from Lando, laughing. “Alright, thays enough. Max, congratulations to you and Kelly. But I think we all know who the real winner is.”
“Who?” Max asks.
“Me,” you reply, smirking. “Because I have to deal with Lando’s reaction to this for the next nine months.”
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The delivery room is a whirlwind of emotions, but through it all, Lando is by your side, holding your hand, cracking jokes, and whispering words of encouragement. When the nurse finally hands you your baby—a tiny, wriggling bundle swaddled in white—you’re overwhelmed with love.
“She's perfect,” Lando whispers, his voice thick with emotion. “Absolutely perfect.”
Later that night, Lando posts the first photo of Baby Love Norris: a close-up of their tiny hand clutching his finger. The caption reads:
"Our greatest Love. Welcome to the world, little lady ❤️."
Two days later, your phone buzzes with a notification. You open Instagram to see another post from Max. It’s almost identical—a photo of his baby’s hand holding his finger, with the caption:
"Our little Love has arrived. We’re so in love ❤️."
Your eyes widen. “Lando!”
He rushes into the room, disheveled but alert. “What? What’s wrong?”
“Max and Kelly named their baby Love.”
Lando stares at you for a moment, then bursts out laughing. “You’re joking.”
“Look!” You show him the post, and his laughter grows louder.
“Of course they did,” he says, shaking his head. “I swear, Max is doing this on purpose.”
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By the next race, the entire paddock is buzzing about the two Baby Loves.
“You sure they're not twins?” Oscar asks one morning, his grin as wide as ever.
“Must be something in the water,” Charles adds with a smirk.
Max and Lando handle the teasing with their usual banter.
“They’re basically the same kid,” Lando says during a press conference, leaning back in his chair.
Max nods. “Mine’s faster, though.”
“Oh, please,” Lando shoots back. “Mine’s already smiling. Yours just cries.”
“They’re newborns, Lando. What do you expect?”
One afternoon in the paddock lounge, Max walks in carrying Baby Love Verstappen, who’s swaddled in a pastel yellow blanket. Lando immediately perks up.
“Look who finally showed up!” Lando says, grinning as he leans over to get a look at the baby.
“She’s beautiful,” you say, smiling warmly.
“Of course she is,” Max replies smugly. “She’s a Verstappen.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Lando mutters. “But I bet she’s not as cute as our Love.”
“Are you seriously competing over babies?” you ask, rolling your eyes.
“They compete over everything,” Kelly says, sitting beside you. “It’s like having two toddlers already.”
By the end of the weekend, people start reposting a meme of the two baby Loves photoshopped into tiny F1 cars, complete with helmets and matching “Love” liveries. Both Lando and Max share it, each captioning it:
"Team Love: P1 and P2 ❤️."
Life is hectic, chaotic, and overwhelming, but as you watch Lando cradle your baby, his face lit with pure joy, you know it’s exactly how it’s meant to be.
MASTERLIST
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stressforu · 8 months ago
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♯ itoshi rin — 'you know how to ball, i know aristotle'
a trend perfectly describing you and rin .
note : proplayer!rin x fem!reader
home page . . .
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' ITOSHI RIN , a renowned soccer player from Japan have been rumored to attend a graduation ceremony just recently.''
The headline in big bold fonts are highlighted in an article, with a stolen shot (blurry if not with his recognizable dark green hair) of rin holding a bouquet of flowers in his left hand while holding his phone in the right, looking like he's texting someone.
Comments flooded the article, almost everyone is reluctant to know what is the famous striker doing at a university?
anon1028: guys, maybe he has a gf?
➜ anon5027: that's impossible, if he did have, it would've been rumored.
However, there was one thing the world already knew, Rin Itoshi was careful with the media. He's meticulous when he goes out, the paparazzi can't even get a single piece of information out of his private life. (The world turned upside down when a stolen shot of him was sent to the media.)
Though Rin Itoshi was meticulous with hiding, he didn't want to miss your graduation ceremony. Seeing you bask in the joy of graduation with friends and batchmates.
He was proud of you, even though he always scolded you when you didn't have enough sleep, forcing you to eat real food because you've been on noodles since last month.
He was willing to give up his private life in order to watch you give your speech as a valedictorian. (wow ...)
And as you ascended into the stage, the speech you wrote you held in your left hand, and the dainty 'clack' of your heels echoed the silent crowd.
You thanked the dean, the professors, and the staff welcomed the graduating students like you, and wished them a happy graduation.
As you near the end of the speech you want to give acknowledgment to a special someone.
"As the speech comes to an end, I want to thank someone very special who has been there for me throughout this journey. Their constant support, encouragement, and belief in me have always given me strength and inspiration. Whether it was studying late at night, feeling unsure, or celebrating achievements, their presence made a big difference."
Rin felt his eyes becoming teary, his face in a blushing mess, and that tight-lipped smile he'd always wear when he's happy.
You continued,
"To my partner, thank you for your endless patience, love, and for always believing in me, even when I struggled to believe in myself. This achievement is as much yours as it is mine."
You bowed, and the crown erupted into claps, awed by the heartwarming speech you had given on this day. You went down the stage to thank your professors and celebrate with your friends. However, you failed to notice Rin, your lover, walking into the crowd with a bouquet in his hand.
The crowd gasped, and someone pointed out shouting, "LOOK IT'S THE ATHLETE !" getting your attention. You gasped, it was Rin.
He walks towards you and hands out his bouquet with your favorite flowers. Congratulating you, and wishing you a happy graduation.
"y-you came..."
"how could I miss my girlfriend's graduation? congrats, baby ..."
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@/itoshi_rin has a new post .ᐟ
———
@/itoshi_rin : love you.
➜ tagged @/yn_tiredofstudying
1728 comments
—> @/sae_toshi : am i dreaming?
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notes : UHHH i dunno what to feel about this
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writingouthere · 1 year ago
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bestfriendsbrother!Sukuna x pregnant!reader one-shot
summary: you're excited to finally share with all your friends that your pregnant when the party is interrupted by your best friend's older brother, who you didn't invite, but who you did have unprotected sex with less than two months ago.
cw: reader is pregnant, Sukuna is a bad dude, possessive behavior, minor smut, still as usual nicer than it sounds because I can't help it.
**************
"I'm pregnant!"
Your news is met with a period of silence before your friends look at each other, uncertain as to how to react.
Nobara finally breaks the silence, an eyebrow raised. "And we feel...."
"We're happy about it," you say and your friends are then quick to congratulate you. You hear some sort of scuffling happening behind you and you turn around to see Yuuji unfolding a "We're having a Baby!" banner which makes Megumi nearly jump out of his chair.
"Holy shit, did you two-"
"No!"
"Ew, no!"
Yuuji frowns at you. "The 'ew' wasn't necessary."
You and Nobara scoff. "It was," you tell him. "And I say that with all my love."
"Okay, so if this idiot didn't knock you up-"
"Hey!"
"-then who did?"
You'd been expecting the question and had prepared for it. "It was just a one night stand, he's not really father material." Everyone looks like they want to ask more questions so you smile at them, genuinely happy they all look ready to commit a crime for you. "It's okay, I have a good job and this is something I've wanted for a long time. This baby will be really loved because it will have me and, I hope, all of you."
Your friends are quick to agree and there's some lighter questions about potential names, nurseries and Nobara and Todo are looking at her phone debating baby onesies, when the door to you and Yuuji's apartment opens and someone you had definitely not invited comes in.
"Sukuna! You're late, you missed the big news," Yuuji calls out as he walks over and claps his brother on the back. A few people call out greetings as Yuuji's older brother looks around the apartment. His eyes linger on you for a second, a smirk tugging up on his lip before he notices the sign hanging crooked over the kitchen doorway and he laughs without an ounce of humor.
"You've gotta be fucking kidding me, you knocked someone up? You irresponsible piece of shit-"
"It's not his and don't kill him, you asshole," Megumi says from where he has now joined the onesies discussion and points over at you. "It's the other person who lives here."
Sukuna pauses from where he was about to murder his brother, to look back over at you. You wonder if his brain is doing the same cursed math that you had done when you were hyperventilating, holding a stick covered in your own pee, but before he could ask anything, Maki ended the silent stand off.
"And we're happy about it, so get happy you piece of shit."
With that, the party continues on, people breaking off until little groups and snacks being placed strategically throughout the apartment.
You're feeling thirsty, and a little exhausted from the burning stare that's been directed at you for the past hour when you excuse yourself from where Miwa and Mechamaru had been talking about their own future plans for children, who you're sure would be socially inept but gorgeous enough to make up for it, and made your way to the kitchen.
You were pulling out some water, no alcohol for you even though you really needed it, when you felt someone's presence behind you.
"So when were you going to tell me we were having a baby?"
"Never, because it's not yours," you answered firmly, slamming the door to the fridge for good measure. Sukuna leaned against the cabinet next to you but you'd known him long enough to see the pose for what it was. A ruse, a performance of casualness. The fingers on his hand tapped against his arm like he was playing the piano, one of the few tics he had that showed when he was feeling, well just feeling anything in general.
"Oh please, you're not fucking anyone else."
"You don't know that and we're not fucking, we fucked once. Singular, past tense."
He laughed and looked down at you, the same predatory look he'd had the night he'd helped you make this child.
"And once was all it took huh? Fucked you so good, you're going to have my baby," he says, voice mocking and he stands up to his full height which puts him over you. He takes the glass of water you're really regretting now, and places it on the counter opposite the two of you.
"It-it's not your baby," but you don't sound sure and he knows it and he presses up against you until your back is to the counter. Nowhere for you to run.
"It's mine, just like you're mine. I don't know who you think you're kidding with this denial of me but it's done now, sweetheart."
You go to answer him and Sukuna covers your mouth with his hand like the rude fuck he is and then leans down, his mouth next to your ear. You look around, worried someone might see you but the gap between the fridge and the counter conceals you both and the room next to you keeps getting louder and louder. The sun had set and there were maybe some lamps in the living room, but here in the kitchen it was dark.
"I let you have your space and your time, two months of it actually. I let you have your little moral crisis about fucking a criminal and it being the best dick you've ever had wah wah, but I was impatient before I knew you were having my baby, and now," he leans back so his eyes, and they're on fire his eyes, are level with yours. "I'm done waiting."
You tug on Sukuna's hand and he rolls his eyes before removing it from your mouth and places it on your hip which doesn't seem like a good trade-off but at least you can speak again.
"What does that even mean?" You ask him, your voice showing the incredulity you're feeling but if Sukuna had anything, it was audacity.
"I mean I'll give you a week to tell your friends you're having our baby and that we're getting married." He says it so seriously that you can't help but laugh which seems to be the wrong response when his other hand moves to your hip as well and squeezes, tight.
"We are not getting married, are you out of your mind?"
"Why not, we're already having a baby, are you going to deny me the ability to live with my own child."
"Still not your kid, and we can't get married Sukuna. We never even dated! We fucked one time, that doesn't mean we should just be together forever."
"We fucked for one night, it was more than one time-"
"Not the argument you think it is," you interrupt him but you still let him pick you up and place you on the counter. You sit there while he runs his hands up and down your thighs, the sounds of the party washing over the two of you as you stay in your little bubble.
"We'd be good together," he finally says. "Not just because I knocked you up on the first try." You hit him but he just smirks and moves his hands more purposefully on your legs. You let him pull them apart and step between them even though warning bells are going off in your head, telling you these are moves you'd seen before and they had led to you being in the predicament the two of you were debating in the first place.
"It's inevitable, the two of us. You can say you hate me, or that I'm not a good man, and that's true. But there's a reason why you've never stayed with any of those nice boys," he says and his hands slips up the skirt you're wearing to get at your bare thighs underneath. "Because you don't want a nice guy, you don't want a good man, you want me and I'm too selfish to let you keep torturing both of us by doing this pretending shit."
The fingers on his right hand press against your cunt through your panties while his other hand squeezes your thigh and he moans sinfully into the quiet air.
"God, I knew I didn't make up this warm, wet cunt. Been fucking my fist until I chafed the past two months just thinking about it."
You whimper as he moves your underwear aside and slips one finger up and down your slit, not touching your clit or going where you want him, but doing enough that you move against his hand.
"This does not mean that we should get married," you protest and he teases a finger against your opening, pulling it back when your hips tilt up in an attempt to get him where you want.
"Why not? I heard pregnant women get super horny, what are you going to do without me around to make sure this filthy pussy gets stuffed just the way she needs." He finally slips one finger in, his thumb moving to tease against your clit, just the way you like it and your head smacks back against the cabinet. He moves the hand that had been on your thigh up so he can cradle your head.
"I'm sure I could find someone willing to help me out," you say scoffing and his hand freezes which makes you whine a little and try to get him to move again but his legs limit your range of motion.
"You ever try to fuck someone else ever again and the coroner is going to have to get dental records to figure out who the dumb fuck with no fingers, no eyes and no cock is, you got it?"
He's not joking, you know he's not joking but it doesn't stop you from leaning forward until you finally get your lips on his. He hums into your kiss, cupping your cheek in his free hand while the other one goes back to opening you up. You're so wet that the kitchen fills with the sounds of his him finger fucking your cunt but you can't even find it in yourself to be embarrassed. He's not wrong that pregnancy has made you more sensitive, or maybe it's just you not having gotten laid since the two of you had slept together.
He's got three fingers in you when you come and he swallows your moans greedily with mouth while his fingers slow inside of you, curving just right to make you think you could probably come again soon, oversensitive or not.
Before you can test that out, he pulls away from you. He licks the fingers he pulled out of you clean and you you're reminded of how the last time he'd made you come twice just with his mouth.
"Where are you going?" you ask him, a little more breathless than you like.
"We are going home," he tells you, grabbing your hands and helping you down off the counter. Giving you a kiss on your forehead that you would tease him for if you were anyone else.
"Home?" you ask, confused because you are currently standing in your apartment unless his orgasms suddenly give one the power to teleport.
"Yeah, our home, not the shitty apartment you share with my brother. I mean we'll have to get somewhere bigger soon, for our baby."
For the first time since you found out you were pregnant, someone who was not you laid out their palm on your still just the same stomach. There was no change from how it always looked but Sukuna looked smug just the same and you felt like you were still missing a few things.
"What-"
"I mean I can fuck you here, I just thought your sensibilities and the fact your friends were all out there would make you uncomfortable."
Your post orgasm flush finally leaves you and you look up at him in panic. "Oh my god, do you think someone saw-"
"It's okay, Fushiguro kept them out I'm sure."
You don't want to know but ask anyway. "Why?"
"Because he walked in earlier and looked like he'd seen a ghost. Tell me, is the kid still a virgin? He's pretty but I can't imagine he has a lot of good options in your crowd."
When you leave to go to Sukuna's, the only people who don't look confused(or horrified in Yuuji's case) at your departure are Maki and Megumi.
If the confusion hadn't been cleared up by the time the baby came, the pink hair probably answered any follow up questions.
dealing with some writer's block and had this idea. didn't feel like writing a whole smut scene, my b but saving that energy for the next(?) neighborsukuna x singlemom one.
side note: Megumi is scarred for life, for sure. Yuuji gets over his horror once he's an uncle.
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theghostavocadoe · 22 days ago
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if you're upset about the voice actor strikes in Hoyoverse games because you miss the voices, congratulations! You've found The Point. this is what happens when companies try to use AI. People quit or get fired.
You have a valid reason to be upset about it. Nobody likes when characters aren't voiced. And that's the entire point of the strike; that voice acting is crucial for Hoyoverse's games.
What's important is recognizing that it's the VOICE RECORDING STUDIO'S fault, not the voice actors themselves. It's not their fault that Formosa Interactive decided to use their voices for AI without their consent. Nobody would quit their job unless they had a good reason for it.
Support your favorite voice actors. Always. Give them love and recognition. And do all that you can to shit on Formosa Interactive for using AI training on their voice actors.
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ivyasproperty · 2 months ago
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Teach me, professor.
prof!agatha.h x fem!student!reader
summary — the infamous professor, agatha harkness, who is known for her cold demeanor, seems to have a soft spot for you, and decides to address the longing glances you cast her way.
warning(s) : smut, legal age gap ( agatha is 46, reader is 21 )
word count : 1.3k words
A/N : i took such a long ass break IM SO SORRY WHAFGAHAGAH, im still not good at writing so bare with me omg
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You stirred awake as the sunlight shone on your face, groaning in annoyance, checking the time on your phone and once again getting blinded by the brightness, you sat up in a panic after realizing you were once again late to class. You were usually able to get up around 2 hours before any of the professors arrived, but lately, your dreams have been plagued by a certain history professor. You quickly cleared your mind of these thoughts, needing to get ready and NOT wanting another lecture from professor Jones, it seemed as if she was always targeting you about the littlest things.
After finally getting ready and rushing out of your dorm room, your burst through the door of the classroom, preparing yourself for yet another lecture, but was surprised to see professor Harkness, the exact professor you'd dream about during your not so innocent slumber. Professor Harkness turned around at the sound of the door slamming open, a smirk adorning her features after realizing you'd finally arrived. "Well if it isn't Miss Y/L/N, take a seat at the front, I'll be substituting professor Jones today, she seems to have gotten a cold," she pointed towards the seat right in front of her as she said those words that you didn't seem to process. Your mind was too focused on the fact that you'd have to endure about 3 hours of her just sitting there, and yes even though it didn't seem like that big of a deal, you could never seem to focus around the woman, her striking features and veiny hands were always distracting you, even in those spectacular horrid dreams of yours. Her clearing her throat broke you out of your stupor, rushing to the seat with flushed cheeks while looking at the ground. You didn't seem to notice the amused look on professor Harkness's face.
Professor Harkness had a big reputation around campus for having a very cold demeanor, you didn't understand why people would say that since she would always give you the softest gazes, and always congratulate you after getting an average score on her test ( they were always A's. But after getting so many of them, they seemed like an average grade to you. )
So there it was, the longest yet fastest 3 hours of your life. You spent most of the time sparing glances at professor Harkness, but whenever you would glance at her, she'd already be staring back at you, causing you to be even more flustered and move around in your seat. Her signature smirk sat on her face, staring at you with those piercing blue eyes, she opened here mouth to say something but it was then that the bell rang. Her face had clear irritation written across it. Just as you were about to leave, you felt a soft yet firm grip on your wrist, looking behind you, your eyes widened at seeing professor Harkness staring at you with a loving gaze, but it disappeared after realizing not all the students have left the classroom. After the last person shut the door, she dragged you by the wrist and sat you down on the chair opposite of the desk.
"So," her voice rang out into the empty classroom, "I couldn't help but notice your sweet staring, pet. Don't think you've been so sly now. So tell me, what goes through your mind, pet?" The nickname sent a wave of arousal through your body, it wasn't the first time she had used it on you, but it always felt like it was. You stuttered out a response so quickly it seemed pathetic. "I- uhm.... It's nothing professor, was just daydreaming is all." She looked at you with skeptical eyes, and kneeled down and inched closer to you, her face was now centimetres away from your own and your mind was screaming to just kiss her, and so you did.
You smashed your lips against hers, the gasp she let out was a sign that she didn't expect your sudden action, and before she could reciprocate the kiss you'd initiated, you pulled away in a panic. Eyes glossing over with tears, and before you knew it, your mouth was spewing out apologies, "P-professor! I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mea-" your words were swallowed by her lips as she kissed you with more passion than you've ever felt. You finally kissed her back after a few seconds of shock. You felt her smirk through the kiss and you whined as she pulled away, trying to chase after her rosy pink lips that looked delicious in your saliva ( idk why but that sounded kinda icky to me.. ). "You poor thing, don't worry pet, I'll take good care of you, just lay on the desk for me, yeah? Be my good girl." Your cheeks heated up at her words, nodding your head and getting on the desk.
Your eyes widened at the sight of her getting on her knees and gripping your thighs rather harshly, it was then you noticed the dark look in her eyes. You let out a loud gasp which was cut off by her hand covering your mouth. "Be quiet, pet. You don't want others hearing you, do you now?" You nodded your head, but the thought of someone walking in excited you a bit, but you'd never let her know, at least not now as she tore off your panties. Thank the heavens that you decided to wear a skirt today. Her nose bumped against the bundle of nerves and you moaned into a hand as she gave a hard suck to your clit. You bucked your hips against her face, and felt the vibrations of her chuckle against you. She ran two fingers across your folds, not surprised by how wet you were and plunged them inside. She let you get used to the feeling of her fingers before setting a steady rhythm. You were moaning loudly into her hand, the feeling of her mouth and fingers on you exciting you. She let go of your clit and stood up to give you a hard kiss, whining into her mouth at the lost suction, she put her thumb to good use and rubbed your clit.
"P-professor.... I'm gonna-gonna come...!-" "Come for me angel, be my good girl." Her permission was all you needed as your body tensed up, pure pleasure rippled through your body as your juices flowed onto her hands. Her pants were drenched in your juices and she couldn't help but laugh at the fact that you had squirted on her. "Oh honey, look at what you've done. Can't blame you though, you look absolutely divine." She kissed your face as she slowly pulled her fingers out of you, careful to not overstimulate you. She carefully dressed you back up, and pat you on the back, signaling it was time to leave. She accompanied you back to your dorm room and gave you a wink before leaving.
Shutting your dorm door, you slid down it and let out a sigh. Your cheeks were still red from the events. And as you were about to take off your clothes to take a shower and deal with the new pressure in your stomach, you felt something inside your skirt pocket. Taking it out, you noticed straight away it was your dearest professors handwriting, on it was a phone number and below was a message, "feel free to call me, bunny. and don't touch what's mine, i'll be sure to take care of it tomorrow in my office. agatha, X." Your heart fluttered at the thought, and you were giddy the entire night, your roommates were surprised at your happy attitude but were happy for you nonetheless. You closed your eyes that night with a thought in your mind, you imagined being in her arms, and before you knew it, you were sound asleep.
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A/N : this is my first time writing smut so bare with me pls. i took a whole ass one month long break so my writing skills are still kinda crusty, but in the end i hope you all enjoyed this one ^^ feel free to leave a request!!
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gotta-winwin · 2 months ago
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OT13 Reaction -- to winning at MAMA awards
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a/n: in celebration of our boys winning both AOTY awards at MAMA last night. i am so incredibly proud i feel like i raised them or something. like guys- it is that serious they are my family and im going insane.
SCOUPS: you're the first one he's calling once he's offstage - he's dialling your number and a whole string of nonsense rattles off him the moment you pick up. he can't string together proper words as you congratulate him. tells you how fucking happy the boys are - you should've seen them, love - did you see woozi crying? and DK - he smiled so big - needs you to bring him back to earth and remind him that this is his award too. he deserves it just as much as they do.
JEONGHAN: he's literally been bored out of his mind as you guys sit at home, watching the award show live. the only times he's acc been paying full attention was whenever groups he knew personally were on screen - and even then - you know you're losing him to how tired he is. lets out the tiniest, babiest gasp when seventeen is announced as the winner. is crying but turns away so you can't call him out on it.
JOSHUA: he runs home to you right after their dinner together and collapses into your arms. he's spent from the sheer chaos and adrenaline. mumbles sweet nothings about how this award is also yours. we won, baby. we share everything - this award is because of you - all because of you.
JUN: he's hiding out in his filming trailer so he can watch the award show through your phone on facetime - it's grainy and glitchy as HELL but he does not care. there's a 3 second lag when seventeen's announced as the winner - so he can hear you screaming but he doesn't know why. his mouth drops once the wifi catches up and he's practically glowing the entire day on set.
HOSHI: comes home wasted and a bundle of pure energy. he's on a high from the win- rushes home to yell into your ear how ecstatic he is as he tackles you for a hug. tells you he's literally so down to name your firstborn child AOTY just cause.
WONWOO: he comes home rather calm despite the chaotic evening he just had. runs you through his whole day- from getting his makeup done to winning the award to having celebratory dinner. you sit and listen happily, cause this is the most yapping you've ever seen this man do and you're SO happy. finishes his yap session by telling you that you make it all worth it - you're the real award, not MAMA.
WOOZI: tells you not to watch their acceptance speech even though he knows you already did :( is uber embarrassed at how emotional his speech was. I was gonna go up and accept it like a nonchalant cool mysterious man but NO! I just had to cry. he doesn't talk about the win much to you, preferring to just enjoy a quiet night in after the crazy evening. whispers to you once you fall asleep that this is why he does music and thanks you and the boys for being his biggest fans.
THE8: sends you the badass photo of him with all their trophies, followed with a long paragraph about how grateful he is to have you next to him through it all. he's unbelievably bright and happy for the next couple weeks, resulting in you kind of missing sassy Hao and asking for him back. side eyes you when you ask and quips "you didn't win a daesang- I did." Well...he's back ig.
MINGYU: comes home and the first thing he says to you is: aren't you proud i didn't cry? pouts when you rewind the clip to point out: he did in fact cry, he was just hiding his ginormous body behind his members. vows to you he won't cry the next time they win- and yes, he promises there will be a next time. and many after that.
DK: a bundle of joy upon his arrival home. keeps telling you he doesn't know what he did to deserve all this- completely floored when you start ranting about why he deserves it all. blushes and hides his face cause the compliments have him shy.
SEUNGKWAN: comes home fully ready to unleash his bragging rights. asks you to only address him by AOTY daesang winner for the next hour, until the joke gets old and he just wants to relax with you. gets a little sappy retelling stories about their trainee days as you both walk down memory lane together.
VERNON: hands you a wad of cash the moment he enters your shared apartment. oh well. i lost the bet. he literally bet against his team winning and ofc you took him on it cause obv seventeen is gonna win?? tells you he was confident svt was going to win he just wanted an excuse to give you cash.
DINO: promises to shout you out the next time svt wins a daesang. obv you don't believe him, so he defends himself, promising that he will 100% name drop his girlfriend on global television for shits and giggles. yeah, i'll just grab the mic and say "i dedicate this award to my WIFE" and watch the internet explode. why not?
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chatsukimi · 5 months ago
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ʜᴇʏ ʙᴀʙʏ, ʙᴀʙʏ
featuring: gojo satoru x reader. humour + hurt no comfort. synopsis: a collection of you and gojo's voicemails/calls to each other throughout the years. masterlist
july 7th, 2006. 11:23am.
"heyy babyy, you miss me?"
cringing to yourself, you listened to your classmate, gojo satoru's, first voicemail to you. the windows were open in the classroom, summer wind blowing in. the heat was almost as annoying as the blondie's voice. gojo and geto are staying at some estate in okinawa to catch some special grade curse.
oh, and for the record, he was not your boyfriend- whatever pet names he constructed for you were his business only.
you'd tried and failed for him to stop.
"... geto says it's a huge curse we're catching. pfft. i think it's easy peasy. and-"
you heard very distinctly geto's voice hollering at gojo on the other line. pinching your lips together, you resisted a smile. what a menace, leaving his friend in the midst of battle just to send a voicemail to you.
it almost warmed your heart.
"-ok, looks like he's having trouble. aww, suguru, do i have to hang up?" a cacophony of harsh bangs and shouting later, you were furrowing your brows and gojo was back on the line. "ok, he thinks you aren't important enough to voicemail right now-"
"i never said that you stupid-"
"harsh," gojo retorted in a strangled tone right back, the faux offence grating your ears. "he doesn't think i should be calling you right now. inconsiderate." then, in a breathless whisper, he said, "call me later, mk? don't forget to congratulate your boyfriend. i expect a hero's welcome!"
the line cut short.
you texted him straight after: i am not in a relationship with you.
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september 1st, 2006. 9:49pm.
"hey baby, i'm out on a mission right now. what's your favourite sweet? they've got mochi, mooncakes, and some pocky. chocolate, strawberry and cream flavoured. tell me and your beloved will bring you his war spoils."
at this point, you'd gotten used to his endearments already.
in your room, all cozied up in your blankets with a hot cup of honey-water in hand, you stared out the window, admiring the nighttime stars. somewhere out there, gojo was fighting.
"you've got to start answering my calls." you could hear him pouting so vividly it chilled you. "wanna hear your voice, baby."
his voice, you realised, was a nice accompaniment to your nighttime routine. he spoke neither too slowly nor too fast. nice and smooth too...
wait- what? you snapped out of it. no way you just complimented gojo satoru.
you dropped the phone on your bed, resolving to ignore him this time.
and the way he haunted your sleep.
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may 25th, 2007. 2:00pm.
"baby baby baby, i'm this close to killing all the higher ups," satoru was mumbling against the phone, the usual smoothness of his voice sunken into callousness. you still couldn't believe he was talking to you like you're there with him; he's miles away. "a two week mission. what were they thinking?
"hmph. it's not even a curse i'm suited to." suddenly realising what he insinuated, gojo added, "easy to exorcise, of course, but so troublesome. they should've hired someone with a slower, more detective-heavy technique. they're keeping me away from you... god, are you forgetting me?"
you listened to him while standing outside a classroom at jujutsu high. geto gave you a wry smile: can't get enough of him, mm? you shot him an angry glare.
it didn't prepare you for the sound that slipped out of the phone.
a whisper.
"do you think i should?"
then you were clutching the phone to your ear, fighting the urge to put his voice on speaker to hear properly, clinging onto every word that escaped him.
"d'you think i should kill the higher ups?"
for the first time since being forced to receive gojo satoru's number, you pressed call.
"... hey bab-"
"gojo satoru," you said his name with a meaning, like you knew exactly what it was meant for, to strike him at his very core. "i like you. stop thinking about murder."
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november 20th, 2018. 5:24pm.
"babe... talk to me. i'm sorry, didn't mean to get trapped in that box in the first place. it's just part of the job. it's nothing. i'm the strongest. plus, i got out just fine.
"i..." careful and slow, his tone resumed a certain responsibility. it showed that he was trying. "... should've been careful, for you. i know that now.
"just come back and talk to me."
november 20th, 2009. 6:30pm.
"babe babe babe babe baby. please..."
november 28th, 2018. 10:23pm.
"hey baby, i'm thinking of taking a break from the jujutsu world after this. let's go on a nice holiday, just you and me. god that'll be fun... m'thinkin of you on the beach." a cheeky lilt crossed his voice. "hah- just joking... maybe. hold on a little more, mk? year's nearly over. i'll pay for it all, the trip. and, well, you know what we were saying about getting married... yeah. okinawa's a pretty place, isn't it? i overheard nanami talking to his friend bout it just then actually."
december 1st, 2018. 00:58am.
"hi baby. it's late. i know. i've been busy." he paused.
silence flooded the line for about five seconds. it was as though his lungs were convulsing in bursts of breath under the weight of things unsaid. he kept quiet.
then, he was moving around, shifting uncomfortably. he wanted to end the voicemail, didn't know why he started it to begin with.
all you heard before the voicemail ended was:
"stay safe."
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december 24, 2018. 4:35am.
"hey baby, i just wanna say... i love you."
you lift your hand up to your mouth, bottling the cry that aches to get out of you. the brutally familiar voice of the white haired sorcerer rasps against your ear. then he breaks out in a dazzlingly clear laughter.
"i... really do. this isn't a joke or anything. i know you know already, but i wanted to tell you." you could guess the ensuing words straight from his mouth. "i don't know if i'll win."
there it is. despite yourself, you smile, treasuring the vulnerability he's shown.
"sorry, i'm not sure why i said that. of course i'll win." you can imagine him puffing his chest out on the other line, confidence filling up his voice once more. "but maybe... in case i don't...
"we had a good run, didn't we?"
you let out a shaky breath.
yeah. we did.
"when i come back, i expect a hero's welcome. ok, babe?"
you're chuckling to yourself as he rambles on and on about kikufuku mochi and a holiday in okinawa, just him and you. no higher ups allowed. no responsibilities. you enjoy the lilt of his voice, terrifying smooth and there despite no real presence.
at last, you put down the phone. a low static drones throughout the apartment.
your photo albums collated on the cupboards, the messy unmade bed, just as you'd left it. two mugs in the kitchen. two pairs of slippers at the doorway.
your thumb drifts away from the replay button. you close your eyes, willing his stupidly annoying voice to haunt you one more time. to taunt you, to tease you, to tell you what you want to hear.
not gojo's very last voice message.
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"yuta..."
you couldn't bring yourself to look up. the height, the weight, the figure. shoko had told you to prepare yourself to see the exact replica of your lover before you.
you know that is impossible... nothing could replace satoru.
your resolve is knocked out of you when you see him. only a glimpse... but the same face, same lips and nose and hair and- oh, your breath catches. same eyes. maybe you couldn't... maybe you couldn't tell the difference after all-
"y/n?"
finally you gather the courage to study him properly.
"yuta," you acknowledge.
you know for certain this is not satoru.
for your satoru had a different voice, clear and powerful as the ocean waves. your satoru spoke with purpose, the undeniable confidence he was right, always, and could not be knocked down. your satoru had a penchant he would not let go of calling you baby.
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wandering-pirate · 15 days ago
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Mouthwashing Crew Headcanon
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Congratulations! You're now the Tulpar Crew's Unwilling Therapist
Why? How? Everyone's a mess and they need you, so stop questioning >:(
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One fortunate 2 AM morning, you were raiding a snack stash. Whose was it? You're here to eat not think
And while shamelessly munching on a yogurt coated oatbar like a man lapping his last meal on death row, the door hissed opened
You straight-up started choking to death, trying to secretly Heimlich yourself, and when you finally dislodged the oatgrain having it shot out your mouth and landing 3 ft. away from the couch, you looked up...
There’s Daisuke. Full-on ugly crying. Like he’s the one who almost got scythed by death
Daisuke so damn cheery 24/7 you were half-convinced his cheeks were sewn to back of his head. But now? Yeah, no. The guy’s face is doing this wet sad puppy thing, and honestly, you kinda miss the creepy sewn-on grin
"Y/NNN~"
Shit, it's his stash! You were ready to half-ass a reason to pin this to Swansea but he grabbed your collars and sobs on you neck
"Is it normal to cry on a wrench? Y/N, Boss gave that to me, it's like my cute little puppy. Except, y’know, it gives me nosebleeds when I’m tightening nuts on the ceiling."
Alright, at this point, the oatbar's been reduced to ashes and dreams, the hell is going on?
The door hissed again, and now you were scrambling, the position Daisuke trapped you in right now can get you a free hundred-day subscription for merciless bullying
"It's not what it lo--"
"Hey Y/N, is the kid finished?"
"Wha-- you mean Dai?"
"Yeah, if he's done then you gotta hear me out now. What's the worst thing someone said behind my back?"
Ok right now, your brain's all question marks. 'Cause a sobbing grown ass man is snotting on your neck and another's asking like he's some prep girl needing to beat someone up over some petty rumor
"No-none that I've heard of..."
"What!? No one's talking about me?? That's even worse!"
Somehow, you manage to wrangle these overgrown manchildren, putting them both to bed after they’ve successfully obliterated your snack time
Daisuke, of course, is still clinging to your arm like a teddy bear, overly needing reassurance
After that? Life... it wasn’t the same
The captain received some valuable intel from a certain co-pilot then starts stopping you at the lounge when you relieved yourself at midnight
“Y/N... do you think I’m a good captain?”
It's 1 am
"Well, no one's mutinied yet, so... yeah, you're probably fine."
"Of course! The absence of rebellion is the mark of true leadership! Y/N, you're a genius! I've been looking at this all wrong!"
You watched Curly skipping - SKIPPING - to his sleeping quarters after patting you in the head
The respect you had for Anya skyrocketed, and once being alone with with the nurse you asked her
"Hey, how'd you deal with all the crap with those rascals?"
She looked at you blanked, then you were unexpectedly given a fromt row seat to Anya's hidden and horrifying side
"I CAN'T! ONE MORE "CAN I EAT EXPIRED SPACE FOODS" QUESTION FROM DAISUKE, I'M RAVAGING THAT GUN FROM THE COCKPIT AND PU--"
"Hey hey hey, Anya, calm down, love!"
"IT'S THE 17TH TIME THIS MONTH, Y/N! SEVENTEENTH!"
After what felt like an eternity of inhale-exhale simon says with the nurse (for her, but mostly for you), her breathing finally slowed down. Thank the stars for that
"How'd you do it Y/N? Every time they ask useless nonsense or dump very emotionally overwhelming things... you send them off calm! It's witchcraft, I swear."
"Honestly, I'm as clueless as you nurse. But you've got too much on your plate, lemme handle this. I've got two ears and infinite tolerance."
"Infinite tolerance? You? The same person who chased Daisuke down for 5 minutes just for a yogurt cup?"
"Hey, that was the last cup and were still 200 days away fro--alright. Just trust me Anya, I got this."
Y'all laughed about the outburst, but you're secretly terrified of her now (respectfully, of course)
One day, you were helping the grumpy mechanic and the man's acting weirdly cryptic
“Why can’t people just…? Ugh, forget it.”
Finally, after handing him a screwdriver for the third time, his grumblings axed a huge ass crack in your patience
“Alright, Swans. What’s eating you? You’re gonna blow a gasket at this rate, and I don’t mean the ship’s.”
The man got two choices, save his non-existent high pride or just release it all
“It’s nothin’. Just Jimboy's been stickin’ his nose where it doesn’t belong, Cap’s stressin’ over somethin’ again, and Daisuke-- Why can’t they just… leave me outta it?”
Ah, he chose wisely. and you weren't gonna tease him for it (not yet, he's gotta pay for stealing your dinner twice)
“Maybe it’s because they think you’re reliable.”
The gruff old man had the nerve to squint at you, you can see it through your trusty side-eye (it made your eyeballs hurt)
"Me? Reliable? Bullshit. 'M just keepin’ this old horse from fallin’ apart.”
“'xactly. You keep the ship together, so... maybe... they figured you can keep them together too.”
This gotta break the record for Swansea's longest silence ever, no snorts, no sighs, no scoffs
The mechanic processed that like you just revealed the meaning of life and sprinkled some fairy dust on his dirty blond head (at least the color's just named dirty unlike jimmy's actual dirty ass hai--)
“Hmph. That’s dumb.”
Your eyes woulda twitched if it weren't for his shoulders relaxing and a small smirk on the mans perma-wrinkled face, you were about to leave when you heard a small mumble
“...Thanks. For the help. Or… whatever the hell that was.”
Men and their pride, however you gave him a pass and grinned
“Anytime, Teddy Bear."
Most days, you could never even breathe oxygen in peace
For the first time, you eyed Polle with a jealous-fueled burning gaze. All it does was blast you with warnings, and you don't even have to do anything! Just breathe in its general direction and you've rewarded yourself with "SAFETY'S A PRIORITY!"
Meanwhile, you’re over here, literally tweaking and that damn horse was living its best, noise-polluting and noise-free life
Eventually, they started dragging you into these "group venting sessions," basically just everyone talking over each other until it’s less of a calm-headed, adult and mature discussion and more of a competition to see who can throw the best threat (Anya surprisingly won thrice)
Until you bang your trusty pot and spoon,
“ONE AT A FUCKING TIME!”
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a/n: this is what my rotting, sleep deprived, caffeine overdosed brain produced, hope y'all like it :,D
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jeonginsleftcheek · 8 months ago
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Cult of Love
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pairing: cult leader!hyunjin x afab!reader
genre: smut
word count: 5.1k
warning/s: brain washing, dumbification, dom/sub dynamics, manipulation, loss of virginity, corruption, hyunjin calls reader 'pretty', 'my lamb' and 'good girl', choking, power play, pain kink, dacryphilia, overstimulation, breeding kink (wow lmk if i missed some)
a/n: this is just some dirty smut i had so much fun writing! hope you enjoy and if you did please reblog!🩷
~check out my: Masterlist♡
Being part of a big community that devotes all their time to serve only one person was not how you imagined you'd be living ever.
But here you are, after everyone in your life abandoned you, after everything stopped making sense, after everything you ever loved started hating you, after you almost fell off the edge.
He was the one who found you and the one who saved your lost, aching soul. A beacon of shining light, a man so beautiful that you weren't even sure he was real.
That was two years ago, when you were at your lowest, and now you are the happiest you've ever been in your entire life.
Your brain is re-wired only to know your leader, your god, Hyunjin. Only to obey his commands, heed by his word, worship him. And you are happy to do so, after all, he saved your life. He knows what's best for you, more than you do. He loves you, you know that anything he does to you and anything he makes you do he does so out of love.
That's what you were taught and what you believe. So, when you're finally invited to his huge tent, you couldn't be more excited.
One of his guards brought you a red rose the day before and you knew, as well as eveyone did, you are the next chosen one.
You can't sleep all night, wondering what's in store for you. What is your leader Hyunjin gonna ask of you, make you do? You really have no idea, but you're ready to do anything he says.
Come the morning, some of the other girls and boys helped you prepare. They've gotten commands to help you wash and shave, which made you feel a little bit nervous. With that you know you'll probably be naked in front of him at one point and you hope he likes what he sees.
You put on a beautiful white dress, one that Hyunjin sent for you through his guards. There's a flower crown on your head, courtesy of the girls and boys helping you get ready.
Your heart pounds in your chest and in your ears when the guards come to pick you up and lead you to your leader's tent. On the way there, people clap for you and congratulate you.
Briefly you wonder, where the other women and men disappeared to after being invited into his tent but you bury that thought in favor of happier thoughts. Like how you can serve your god.
As soon as you walk in with the guards, you don't dare to look up so you don't seem disrespectful.
"Leave us."- his sweet voice rings in your ears. The guards bow shortly and leave, leaving you alone with Hyunjin.
"Kneel, pretty."- he says and you do so, falling to your knees immediately, your eyes trained on the ground. Footsteps shuffle closer towards you and your heart jumps up into your throat.
"Look at me."- he says, his voice a little bit lower than before. You look up and are met with his godlike features that you missed seeing since he doesn't come out of his tent often. You're in awe every time you catch a glimpse of him, now even more when you're so close to him.
He places his finger on your chin, lifting it up a little. Your lips part as you continue looking at him. His finger slides slowly on your jaw down to your neck where he wraps his hand around you but doesn't squeeze.
Your eyes flutter at the action, hands folding behind your back in an act of submission towards your leader.
"Are you gonna be a good girl for me?"- he asks.
"Yes, yes I will."- you answer immediately.
"You will do what?"- he smirks.
"I will be a good girl for you."- you repeat his words.
"Good."- he says, unwrapping his fingers from you and leaning back. "I wonder why I haven't brought you here earlier. You're really pretty."- he adds, leaning down to look at you more closely.
His eyes are dark and deep and you find yourself drowning in them, feeling weak and submissive just from the way he looks at you.
"T-thank you, Sir."- your voice wavers.
"Hyunjin will suffice. I want to hear my name from those pretty lips."- he smirks again, running his thumb on your lower lip.
"Yes, Hyunjin."- saying his name like that feels blasphemous and you feel like you should be punished just for uttering it so easily. But he ordered you to call him by his name and that's what you're gonna do.
Hyunjin looms over you, his hands on your shoulders, slowly pushing the straps of your dress down. Your chest rises and falls together with your rapid breathing, his touch feels electric on your skin.
He keeps pushing your dress down until your ample breasts pop out for him to admire.
"So pretty."- he whispers, his fingers ghosting over your hardening nipple ever so slightly, teasing you.
Your breath catches in your throat, as he smiles at you.
"You've never been touched, right?"
"No, never."- you say, shaking your head innocently.
"That better be the truth, my lamb. You're mine to corrupt."- he smiles even wider and you shiver.
"It's the truth, Hyunjin."- you whisper his name, it still feels too holy to just roll of your tongue like that.
He smirks and starts undressing right in front of you, while you still kneel on the floor, breasts exposed. You can't believe he's doing that already, you feel like you haven't earned to look at his perfect body yet.
But there he is, in all his glory, his semi hard cock right in front of your face and your mouth waters, arousal pools between your legs.
"Worship my cock, pretty."- he's smirking at you, half-lidded eyes tracking your every breath, every twitch, every shiver.
"Yes, Hyunjin."- you whisper and lean in closer. Your hand comes up to the base of his cock, tongue poking out of your lips to give his head a few experimental licks.
He chuckles at you, his hand coming down to caress your head gently.
"You're like a little kitten."- he says condescendingly but to you anything he says is a compliment.
"Put your mouth around it."- he instructs and you do so, enveloping his head with your lips.
"Show me how good you want to be for me. Suck."- Hyunjin commands and you do just what he says. You start lightly sucking on his head, darting your tongue out to play with his slit experimentally and the most beautiful low grunt comes out of his mouth.
You're encouraged by that so you take more of him in your mouth, and his fingers entangle in your hair, holding you more tightly.
Pretty sounds keep coming out of his mouth as you take more and more of him, his cock growing harder in your wet mouth. You're proud of yourself, so proud that you're making your god feel this good, that your own arousal drips down your inner thigh. You press your legs together and Hyunjin notices.
You're too lost in the pleasure of pleasing him that you don't notice the smirk growing on his face, nor the hand that holds your head holding you even tighter now, but still careful of the pretty flower crown that adorns you. He grabs a fistful of your hair and without warning pushes his cock in deeper into you, his tip hitting the back of your throat, making you gag as tears gather in your eyes, saliva dripping down your chin.
"You gag so sweetly."- he smirks holding your head down and fucking your face lightly. Your heart starts beating faster as you fold your hands behind your back again letting Hyunjin use your face for his pleasure. Tears stream down your cheeks and you shut your eyes tight as he picks up speed. There's nothing you can do but try to breathe through your nose and let him have his way with you.
"Look at me!"- he orders, pulling on your hair and you whimper around him, sending vibrations through his cock as you open your eyes and try to look at him, vision blurred by your tears.
"I love seeing you like this. So pretty when you're ruined for me."- he says and you moan around him again.
"But we're just getting started, my lamb."- he pulls his cock out of your mouth abruptly and you cough a little, trying to regain your senses.
"Get up."- Hyunjin orders and you do so.
Hyunjin's hands are back on your dress as he slides it down your body. You've got nothing under it, just how he wanted you to come to him.
Suddenly, you feel self conscious, being naked like this in front of someone you considered your only god. Your hands fold over your body in an attempt to cover up.
"Are you trying to cover yourself up from me?"- Hyunjin asks, and you look at him, shivering under his gaze.
"I'm- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."- you swallow, letting your hands fall on your sides.
"It's okay my little lamb."- Hyunjin coos at you, hand coming up to cradle your cheek. "It's your first time, I know you're just being shy. But you don't have to be afraid, I know what you need. I know what's best for you."- he whispers the last sentence, as he comes closer to you.
"Yes, Hyunjin."- you repeat the same two words like you're under some kind of spell, mesmerized by his eyes, his lips, his touch.
"Yes what?"
"Yes, you know what's best for me."- you say as he leans in even closer, his breath on your lips.
The hand that was on your cheek is now holding the back of your neck, as his other hand slides down over your breast and side to your lower back. Hyunjin pulls you into his body and you feel how hot his skin is against yours. It makes your senses buzz as he presses his plump lips on yours.
He cradles your head with his big hand, tilting it back and holding you in place as he devours your lips with his. You moan against him, parting your mouth and allowing his tongue to slip in.
Your eyes roll back and you shut them tightly as he pushes his tongue as deep as he can and starts exploring your mouth, tasting you and making sure you never forget the taste of him.
You're not sure if you're allowed to touch him so you keep your hands on your sides, fingertips digging into your own hips because you need to hold on to something. Hyunjin's stealing away your breath with his kiss, you feel dizzy, like you're floating. He finally releases you when he's almost out of breath and you gasp as he looks at you wildly, biting on his lower lip.
"Want you on the bed. Now."- he growls and you almost trip over the carpet in an attempt to lay down as fast as you can.
"Easy, pretty. Don't damage my goods."- Hyunjin smirks as he grabs onto your arm and steadies you.
"I'm sorry, Hyunjin."
"Just lay down."- he orders a little more gently, trying to soothe you and also calm himself down. He's not one to yell or hurt his object of affection unless it's punishment and it's absolutely needed. And he doesn't want to scare you, not with how unhinged he gets when he's turned on.
You lay down as he instructed you, his bed is comfortable and the sheets seem to be made of satin or something similar. You've never touched something as soft as that fabric and it soothes your fast-beating heart just a little.
"Show me that sweet pussy, my lamb."- Hyunjin wastes no time as he sits on the bed.
You gasp a little, taken aback by the command but you obey nonetheless, spreading your legs as wide as you can to show Hyunjin what belongs to him.
He bites his lip, hands on your thighs as he leans in closer between your legs.
"Beautiful."- he says, eyeing it and you feel so vunerable and exposed, even a little humiliated but you try to remind yourself it's your leader Hyunjin, you're his and your body is his, and he has the right to look at you however he wants.
"It looks like a pretty rose."- he adds, smirking and you swallow, you heart almost leaping out of your chest as arousal gushes out of you.
"T-thank you, Hyunjin."- you say quietly, lips trembling in anticipation.
Hyunjin leans in even closer, breath fanning over your wetness and your pussy clenches around nothing. He smirks, he's teasing you and he knows he can do that as long as he wants and you don't get to say no or protest it, you just have to take it.
You wouldn't dare go against him, you believe in him too much to do something bad.
So you keep still as his finger makes contact with your clit. He circles it a little, before sliding it down over your folds, teasingly dipping the pad of his finger inside your dripping hole.
You breathe deeply, trying to calm your racing heart and you feel an ache in your pelvis, an ache telling you to move and chase his fingers, beg for more, anything he'll give you. But you know better than that.
Hyunjin gathers some of your wetness with his fingers and brings them to your lips.
"Taste yourself."- he says and you put your tongue out and start licking at his fingers, eyes never leaving his. He looks at you as if he's going to devour you and you wouldn't mind if he did.
He moves his hand away from your lips and leans down. You think he'll kiss your lips so you close your eyes and wait for him but then you feel his tongue on your nipple.
"Ah!"- you moan as your eyes snap open and you look at him. Hyunjin smirks, his tongue playing with your nipple, moving it up and down, left and right. You're already shaking, so sensitive as you've never been touched like this before.
Hyunjin puts his hand on your other breast, giving it a squeeze before pinching your nipple. He grips your breast again as he takes your nipple in his mouth and starts sucking.
The sight and the feeling together is too much so you shut your eyes tightly, head falling back as you start whimpering and arching into him.
A shot of pain runs through you and your eyes open, only for your mind to register that Hyunjin bit on your nipple.
"Don't look away from me."- he grins, tongue darting out to lick at your tender nipple.
"I'm s-sorry."- you whimper, body twitching under him.
He moves to your other breast, giving it equal attention and when you think he's done, he's not. He just keeps playing with your nipples until they're swollen and tender and you can't take anymore. Silent tears run down your cheeks as you whimper. Hyunjin releases your nipple from his lips and comes up closer to your face.
"Why are you crying, my lamb?"- he asks, knuckles brushing gently on your cheek.
"It hurts."- you whisper, another tear threatening to fall down but Hyunjin wipes it off.
"I promise it'll feel good, pretty. You know I love you, hm? You trust me, don't you?"- he coos at you again, caressing your face and you can't help feeling small when he talks to you like that. Feeling like, to thank him you need to submit to him, be good for him, do what he orders, trust everything he says.
"I trust you, Hyunjin. I would never dream of doubting my leader."- you say.
"Good girl."- he grins. "Now, keep watching me."- Hyunjin whispers as he leans down between your legs, his face close to where you need him the most.
He teases you with kisses to your inner thigh, all the way towards your core, still avoiding it and pressing kisses all around it. You shiver, keeping your eyes on his every move as he commanded you. He looks back at you, eyes unwavering as he presses a kiss to your clit.
You bite on your lip and stay still while Hyunjin starts playing with your clit, giving it teasing kisses and little licks at first before he wraps his lips around it and starts sucking and licking faster. Your legs tremble and you accidentally moan too loudly, arm coming up so you can bite on it.
"Don't do that, pretty. Let me hear your pleasure."- Hyunjin immediately grabs your arm and moves it away from your lips.
"I'm sorry, Hyunjin."- your lips tremble, eyes watering a little. You don't want to keep making mistakes like that and look dumb in front of Hyunjin, you want to be good for him and worthy of his love.
"Hey, hey, don't apologize. You're still learning, my little lamb. Just let me guide you, okay?"- he soothes you with his sweet voice, hands gently caressing your thighs.
"Yes, Hyunjin."- you chant again, determined to follow every command, obey every order he gives you.
Hyunjin leans back down between your legs, this time his tongue slides between your folds.
You gasp at the action, hands gripping the pretty satin sheets under you. Hyunjin smirks as he grips your ass, thumbs on either sides of your core, slowly pulling you apart, opening you up for him.
You whimper, pussy clenching around nothing again and he looks up at you, eyes dark and full of lust.
"Such a sweet pussy. Desperate to be stuffed, hm?"- he asks but gives you no time to answer as he dives in, pushing his tongue inside you as deep as he can.
You're moaning and whining, your legs trembling, knuckles turning white where you grip at the sheets. Nothing ever felt as good as this in your life, Hyunjin is pleasing you so well, swallowing all your juices.
You almost feel too ashamed that you have your god do something like that to you, but that makes you feel even more determined to please him too and give him whatever he asks of you.
Hyunjin is relentless, his tongue is never tiring, even when your moans grow higher in pitch and you feel something swirl in your stomach. It travels down as you keep shaking, legs almost closing around Hyunjin's head and he fucks your pussy with his tongue even faster and you can't hold it in anymore.
"P-please!"- you beg, you don't even know what for but Hyunjin doesn't stop or slow down, and you let go as you moan his name repeatedly, your juices painting his tongue, lips and chin.
"You did so well, my lamb."- he says, a little breathless.
"T-thank you. Hyunjin."- you whimper as he dives back in to play with your clit, flicking it with his tongue fast, teeth grazing at it and you mewl, legs falling open again.
It's a lot, almost too much, but you want to take it, you want him to keep playing with you as long as he wants. Your legs are shaking as he keeps making out with your pussy and you explode on his face again. And then again. And again until you've lost count.
Tears keep streaming down your cheek and you don't even register Hyunjin's face in front of yours until he gently wipes your tears away.
"H-Hyunjin."- you cry out.
"Shh. It's okay, my lamb. You're doing so good for me."- he praises you, fingers running up and down your soaking wet pussy, tortured after all the orgasms he ripped from you.
"I want to be- be good for you."- you whimper as he dips his fingertips into you.
"You do?"- he smirks sickly at you and you nod fervently.
"Then you can take two fingers immediately."- he says and slowly starts pushing into you.
You moan, your back arching instinctively as you grab at the sheets again. Hyunjin's fingers are slender but long and you feel the shape of his knuckles as he pushes them in deep, all the way to the ring that adorns his finger, the coldness of it making you shiver.
He starts moving them slowly as your lips fall open into a silent moan and you stare into his eyes, completely mesmerized by him.
"Feels good, pretty?"- Hyunjin asks. The orgasms you had before helped open you up and lubricate you so you weren't in any pain as he keeps stretching you slowly.
"So good, Hyunjin."- you whimper, your eyes fluttering but staying open. You don't want to accidentally shut them or look away from your leader.
He starts moving them faster as he comes closer to you, peppering your face in kisses, catching your tears with his lips. He kisses your eyelids, your nose, the corners of your lips while he keeps plunging his fingers faster and harder into you.
The contrast of his gentle kisses and the way his fingers are abusing your pussy make you feel incredibly hot. Your mind and body buzzes, you don't know anything but Hyunjin in that moment and you feel a pressure build up, a pressure you've never felt before.
"Let go."- Hyunjin orders when he sees you struggling. And you obey, you let go and squirt all over the bed and his hand just as he pulls his fingers out of you.
"Fuck. That's my good girl."- he smirks and pushes his fingers into you abruptly again.
"Ah!"- you almost scream out as he starts fucking you fast again, your pussy screaming with overstimulation. You want to close your legs, beg him to stop but at the same time you never want him to stop.
"You can take one more finger, right my lamb?"- Hyunjin hovers over you. You look up at him with your hooded and wet eyes and nod.
"Words, pretty."- he warns you, his free hand coming up around your throat.
"Yes, I can take it! Please!"- you cry out, spreading your legs even more.
Hyunjin pulls his fingers out and then pushes three of them back in and the stretch has your eyes rolling back. You seek to ground yourself somehow so you grab his bicep, the one that belongs to the hand holding your neck and he squeezes a little.
"H-h-Hyunjin..."- you whimper as Hyunjin fucks you with such force that it has your whole body rocking together with the bed.
"Tell me pretty..."- he smirks. "Do you want my cock inside you?"
Your mind is gone, all you know is Hyunjin and the need to submit to him completely, to give into him even if he kills you.
"Yes, yes, yes, yes please! Yes!"- you keep chanting as your pussy clenches around his fingers, the squelching sound of your wetness so sinful.
"Squirt for me again and I'll think about it."- he smiles crazy at you but to you he looks beautiful and perfect and you have to obey him. So you let go and squirt again, even more than you did before, your heart beating so fast you're scared it'll actually leap out of your chest.
"Fuck!"- Hyunjin looks crazed, hand coming down to slap your pussy. You whine loudly in pain and surprise, feeling so sensitive after everything he did to you. "I need to breed this sweet pussy now. You want that, hm?"
"Yes, I do!"- you whine again as he grabs his cock, sliding his hard tip on your pussy, pressing it into your clit.
"Beg for it!"- he grabs at your neck again, the tip of his cock between your folds, slowly opening you up.
"Please breed me, Hyunjin!"- you beg, and his eyes roll back before he looks at you wildly and starts pushing in.
Your pussy opens up like a flower to take him, you're so tight and warm, so pliant for him like you were made just for this.
His hand squeezes around your neck as he keeps stretching you with his cock, and you feel a sudden rush of fear with your air being cut off like that, the little sting between your legs, the question if you'll even be able to take all of him.
Your nails dig into his arm and he looks at you so darkly, like he's in a trance and you shiver as the tip of his cock pushes up to your cervix.
"Trust me my little lamb. I'd never hurt you."- he squeezes more and you almost start panicking as little spots appear in front of your eyes.
But you trust him and he starts moving slowly and then he finally releases your neck. You gasp for air, your head is spinning as Hyunjin almost pulls out only for him to push back into you forcefully, knocking the breath out of you again.
"H-Hyunjin! I-it hurts!"- you whimper, tears gathering in your eyes again as he pounds into you.
"It'll feel better. Don't worry, pretty."- he whispers and captures your lips in his, shutting you up.
His tongue forces your lips open, exploring your mouth again, his hands have a bruising hold on your hips.
"Unless you want me to stop completely."- he smirks as he suddenly moves away from you.
"N-no, please don't stop!"- you beg, desperate for him. You want him closer to you, as close as it's possible and you ignore the fear bubbling inside you with the way he's looking at you.
"No? You want me to fuck this tight pussy until she can't take anymore, hm?"- he grins, pressing his fingers on your swollen clit and flicking them in time with his thrusts.
"Yes, please Hyunjin! Please!"- you grab at his arm again and he chuckles darkly, speeding up as his hips slap into you so hard that the bed starts rattling. His cock is ripping you apart but all the pain you felt turns into pleasure, and you can't contain your moans nor keep your eyes opened.
Hyunjin enjoys the view of you spread completely open for him, your hair like a halo around your head, the pretty flower crown ruined, leaving some of the flowers stuck in your hair, tears sliding down your cheeks, your pretty lips parted. He enjoys the power he holds over you, how pliant you are for him, how you'd do anything he asks of you. You just might be his favorite, he thinks as he grips your hips harder, his nails digging into your flesh.
Your eyes snap open and meet with his, there's something animalistic in them and fear runs through you again making your pussy clench around him.
"Are you gonna come for me again, pretty?"- he smirks.
"Y-yeah... I'm... I-" - you can't even form a coherent sentence, not with the way he's fucking you, his hands now roaming all over your body, one of them coming up to wrap around your neck again.
"Can you even talk?"- he chuckles as you lean into his hand, ready to let him choke you to death if that's what he wants.
"Ah!"- you moan when he hits that sweet spot inside you.
"Going a little dumb on my cock, aren't you my lamb?"- he growls as he fucks into you harder, his tip hitting your sweet spot repeatedly, driving you insane until you explode all over his cock.
"Mm yes!"- you answer him, your ears ringing and your whole body tense.
"Gonna breed you now."- Hyunjin squeezes your neck, your air cut off again as his hips pound into you. Your lips fall open, eyes wide as you stare at his dark ones, filled with lust and something else lurking behind it.
His hand is bruising on your neck and you panic, feeling like you're slipping away even though the way his cock is ravaging you makes you come on him again and that's the last straw Hyunjin needed before his cock twitches inside you and he paints your walls with his warm come.
He finally releases your neck, you cough and gasp, grabbing at it, your whole body shaking as your wide eyes stare up at Hyunjin.
"You took that so well, my little lamb."- he says as he pulls out, leaving you feeling empty.
"T-thank you."- you voice is hoarse and you almost don't recognize it. Hyunjin reaches to touch your face and you flinch for some reason, which makes him frown.
"Are you afraid of me, pretty?"- he asks, his face serious and seemingly devoid of any emotions. You swallow and lean your face towards his hand.
"No, I'm not."- you say, trying to convince him and yourself even though your heart is beating fast.
"Why did you flinch?"
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. It wont happen again."
"It better not. I told you I would never hurt you. Only if you misbehave, then I have to punish you. But you know that everything I do is for your good, right lamb?"- Hyunjin smirks again, caressing your cheek.
"Yes, I know Hyunjin."- you nod.
"Good. Because I'm going to keep you here. You will serve me every day from now on. You will be my wife and bear my children."- he grins, getting up from the bed.
"Really?!"- you ask as you sit up, excited that you out of all people were chosen to serve Hyunjin, to become his wife and give him children.
"Yes. Are you happy about that?"- he hovers over you, hand holding your chin.
"Very happy. And honored."- you nod fervently.
"My little lamb. You know I love you, right?"- Hyunjin asks and there's something gentle shining in his dark eyes.
"Yes, I... I love you too, Hyunjin."- you answer, your lips trembling.
"I know you do."- he smirks again, caressing your head. "Go to sleep now. I have some things to take care of."
"You're not gonna sleep with me?"- you whimper, eyes already watering at the thought of not being next to your leader and soon-to-be husband.
"I'll join you later, my pretty. Don't be sad."- he coos, laying you down and tucking you in.
"Okay."- you say, your eyes closing. After all, you were beyond exhausted and it didn't take long for you to slip away into dreamland.
Hyunjin stands over you for a few moments, eyes scanning your sleeping face, dried tears on your cheeks, lips swollen from kisses and bruises around your neck.
He grins, you're so obedient and innocent, so eager to please him. Everyone else disobeyed him and questioned him but not you. You are so sweet, so good for him. He's going to have so much fun with you and he can't wait to show you just how dark he can be.
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berryz-writes · 8 months ago
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You're mine, sweetheart
Summary: Theo cheers you up after a shit day
Theodore Nott x reader
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Pansy looked me up and down, hate simmering in her eyes. She scoffed "Don't tell me that's what your wearing. You look like an absolute slag"
After being best friends with her for our first few years and realising how toxic she really was I had tried to keep my distance from her but she didn't get the hint and instead liked to comment on each and every thing I did. Of course the comments hurt me but maybe after the years they just didn't hurt as much. Maybe I was immune now. The dress I had chosen for this nights party was a short green dress, something to celebrate our Quidditch win but of course the dress didn't live up to her expectations. What was really annoying was she wore a similar dress just a few weeks back but according to her I was the one who looked like a slag.
"I think it looks nice Pansy"
I turned to my mirror and applied a light pink lip gloss that was almost finished because of the amount of times I had used it. I couldn't be bothered arguing with her tonight. I wasn't about to let her ruin my mood.
"I bet you tried finding the shortest dress in that store"
I rolled my eyes "What are you on about?" I was getting tired of her stupid, annoying comments.
"You know exactly what I'm on about. Don't think Theo's gonna fuck you after this, honey. Your just like all the other desperate bitches at the party"
I gritted my teeth together and put my lip gloss down trying to appear as unaffected as I could. "Fuck off. Jealousy isn't a good look on you"
I walked past her, tears forming in my eyes. Before I could leave she made sure to mutter "Once a whore, always a whore". I let my feet carry me outside to the warm summer evening where the sun was setting. I walked around the lake trying to blink away the tears so my makeup wouldn't be ruined. Was there any point of going to the party? No, probably not.
I sat down on hill, the freshly mowed grass making a soft carpet for me to relax on. Me and Theo had sat hear many times before whether it was to have a late night snack or to miss lessons. It was a comforting place.
I sat there until the sun set and soon it got darker. Almost too dark. My thoughts had cleared now. My tears no longer trying to make an appearance. Maybe I could join the party. Just because one person was being an ass didn't mean everyone else would be.
As I was contemplating on whether I should stand up or not someone cleared their throat behind me. I raised my wand instantly expecting...well something scary I guess.
It was in fact Theo holding a small golden lantern. I didn't bother standing up and instead waited for him to flop down next to me.
"My favourite person isn't going to congratulate me on my performance today?" He placed the lantern between us so we were both bathed in a warm orange light. I could just about make him out, his features looking almost worried.
"You were good." I said. I didn't have the social battery to talk to him right now even if he had done nothing wrong.
He smiled at me "I know. What's up with you? Your usually dragging me to parties but instead your...well from my point of view it looks like your mourning your rabbit"
I let out a small laugh. Even at times like these he could make me laugh. "I just don't understand. Why is it so hard for some people to be nice?"
Theo shrugged "They're probably insecure. Or jealous."
"Yeah. Probably"
We sat in silence for another few minutes before Theo stood up stretching out his hand to me "Come on, sweetheart. Your the life of the party. It's no fun without you"
I stood up and handed him the lantern instead "You can be the life of the party tonight. I'm tired"
"Don't let someone ruin what you want to do. Y/n you love parties. You've never missed one. Unless you really are tired, I'll respect your decision and walk with you to your room"
I contemplated my options. I could do what I really wanted to do which was go to the party and enjoy life with my friends or I could get cosy in my bed and feel like a coward for the next week. He was right. No one got to influence what I wanted to do.
"Your playing truth or drink with me then"
He grinned at me "Whatever you want, sweetheart"
As we walked back inside the castle from a more hidden entrance Theo made sure to hold my hand because apparently he "didn't want me to trip and get hurt". Whatever the reason was it didn't stop butterflies from forming in my stomach.
I had to blink at the sudden brightness of the corridors, the light finally letting me see Theo clearly. He had dropped my hand and instead was surveying me.
Theo's eyes took their time on inspecting my outfit, hungrily devouring the way the dress emphasised my curves. He finally brought his gaze up to look at me, his eyes slightly darker than usual "You look absolutely divine"
I smiled at the compliment "If you weren't my best friend, I'd say you were flirting with me"
He raised an eyebrow "Maybe I am. It's quite hard not to when my best friend is so fucking gorgeous" My cheeks heated at his words, my dress feeling a little too tight all of a sudden. I think I needed to sit down after that.
He extended his arm so I could wrap my hand around it. "I can't wait to tell everyone we're dating"
I paused. What did he say? "If that's ok with you" He added hastily.
I thought about what he said. Had I always imagined what it would be like if Theo asked me out and we weren't just best friends anymore? Of course I did. Every single second of every single day.
"That's fine with me"
He smiled again, a small dimple appearing in his left cheek "Then it's settled. Your mine, sweetheart. And I'm yours" 
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adhdduckie · 2 months ago
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still not yours ; g.s. x reader, s.g. x reader
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synopsis ;gojo has made the biggest mistake of his fucking life. he wants you back, but you don't want him, because now, you're with suguru. Tw: ANGST no fluff no comfort
#nofluffwedielikemen, lowkey happy ending for reader, not for gojo
PT 1
my masterlist
jjk masterlist
A/N : since there were a couple of people asking for a continuation, i thought i'd give it a go. in this one you've ended up with suguru, and gojo is finally understanding what he's missing.
1k (its a bit short, soz)
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gojo has fucked up. royally. like he's definitely fucked up before, but god, he's never fucked up this bad.
to fully understand what's happened, we need to go back to the beginning of his and yuki's relationship, to where we left off last.
you had been crying in your bed, after yuki and gojo had finally announced that their relationship was serious, and that they were both hopelessly in love with each other.
you had heard a knock at your door in the midst of your sobbing, and you paused, before you let out a small "go away."
the knocking stopped briefly, before suguru announced himself.
the door opened, and he walked through, sitting on the edge of the bed as he looked at you with what you felt like was extreme pity.
not wanting to see what how he was looking at you, you turned your face into the pillow hiding it from his eye of sight.
"hey, hey. it's okay. it's okay." he told you, patting you on the back.
"this is embarrassing." you cried, trying to laugh behind your tears.
"c'mon, look at me." suguru told you, trying to ease you into sitting up and to look at him.
"i've got snacks." he tells you. that does it for you and you slowly sit up, trying to look at him, hiccuping through the tears that are streaming down your face.
he wordlessly passes the bag full of your favourite snacks to you, and you lean into him, letting him hug you.
"i feel so dumb." you tell him, hiding your face in his shirt.
"it's okay, he's the dumb one for missing out." getou tells you, combing his fingers through your hair. from that moment when getou had chosen to come to you to make sure you were alright, that changed everything.
as months passed, you felt yourself slowly feeling the love you had for satoru to slowly melt away, into a kind of reluctant favouritism of a friend.
because, no matter what, satoru would always just be your friend, and nothing else.
and in that time, you felt yourself falling hard and fast for getou.
it was everything about him.
the way how you were always the first person he'd talk to in a group, and how if you all went out together, he'd always be stuck by your side, to make sure that you were okay.
you thought you would never feel as cared for as you were by getou's side, because he knew you, like he really seemed to know you.
he was always just there for you, and spending so much time with him every day really changes the way you see someone.
and again, you felt like you might just actually have a chance.
you'd never heard him talk of any other girls, and so, at some point, you confessed your feelings for him. he'd been so happy at that moment, he'd picked you up and twirled you around, laughing as he pulled you close and kissed you hard on the mouth.
he'd been waiting forever for you, but he just knew that one day, you'd love him too.
and when you finally debut your relationship in your friend group, shoko's so happy for you she swears she's not crying, but you think you see a tear collect in her eyes. yuki's happy and congratulates you, but gojo, he feels something wrong in his chest.
something is so wrong in his chest. he manages to mutter out a half arsed congratulations and he turns his attention back to his phone.
he can’t just quite figure it out, and when yuki tries to pull him closer to her by the loops on his jeans, he realises he doesn’t really want her to touch him, and he’s never really enjoyed it for some reason in the beginning.
he thinks he’s getting sick. there’s something so wrong with him right now. and he really hasn’t told anyone this, but almost as soon as he got with yuki for real, he lost interest.
that sounded bad, sure, but once he actually got with her, she just seemed, too good. they never fought or anything, and there seemed to be no actual passion in their relationship, because everything was just, okay.
and that’s all it was with yuki, just okay.
from that moment on, gojo started noticing things he never noticed before.
how, for every lesson that the two of you had together, he was excited to go to, because he knew that he’d see you, and he’d be excited to talk to you.
and how if you all hung out, he wanted to talk to you the most, and mostly you.
and how he started to notice all the smallest things about you he forgot he’d ever even noticed in the first place, like how your hair fell over your eyes, the way you’d blink up at him when he said something that you were trying not to laugh at, and how you’d lean against a chair, or just the way you sat.
and maybe then, he started resenting a bit of getou. it took him a while to fully comprehend why. he had finally, finally realised that he was in love with you.
and god, gojo knew it was wrong. getou was his best friend, he should have known better. but secretly, gojo wanted you to break up, and realise how in love you were with him.
and there wasn’t a day that went by that gojo wished he had said something other than “that’s funny” when you told him that you used to like him, but his heart had stopped in his chest, and he really didn’t know what else he could have said at that moment.
and when he finally realised this, gojo broke up with yuki.
yuki, he thought, seemed secretly glad that they had broken up, and so he wasn’t too worried about how she was feeling about it.
and everyone asked why they broke up, and he couldn’t just tell him that he was in love with his best friend’s girlfriend, so he just told them that he didn’t love her anymore, and when you asked, he damn well almost blurted out “i’m in love with you.”
and that shit hurt, because there was nothing he could do about it now, and god he knew he really fucked up.
but getou had the girl now, and he still wasn’t yours.
@disilluzions @jprincesssf @superirisss
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theeternalwombtarot · 1 year ago
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Your present reality vs far future
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message: I'm doing a reading from bed today guys, believe it or not, I have not done any readings from bed in quite a long time lol! I have a designated table for these types of things in the house but I'm feeling like taking it easy today and relaxing. Sometimes doing readings or creating tarot content feels like a chore although I really love it. Many things in my life have felt like a chore lately between work and school and managing my time properly and whatever else I have selected to put on my plate. This is the reason why I'm pulling this reading out of my draft list, I have many readings stored away in my drafts about various things. I felt called to do this one because I felt that maybe the collective wanted some insight as to what the life they're working towards or manifesting may look like. I've been feeling called to do these types of 3D-themed readings for a while. I also considered releasing a financial forecast reading as well. I'm asking spirit and setting my intention for this reading to motivate and help awaken the collective to the reality their higher selves live and what needs to be done or put in in order to receive the manifestation of the dream life you deserve collective. I know many people whose past life karma, the beliefs they grew up with, their childhood trauma, and the experiences that they were given within this lifetime to put them on their highest path of ascension if they made the right choices or saw things the best way has made them feel very discouraged and stuck and has ruined the idea that a good life is available for them to be a recipient of. It is not your fault that the divine plan that was set in place for you to learn certain lessons was difficult or was dreadful or took such a large toll on you but it is possible to heal from and be relieved from such a way of things. I swear. And today I will try and deliver to you the truth of a life you could live away from the hurt, the karmic cycles, and the trauma or hard times. Anyways, many months ago when I created the draft for this reading I chose Miss Frida Kahlo and her wonderful art for my banner and my pick-a-pile covers. I hope that you enjoy her as much as I enjoy her and her legacy and art.
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i.
your past: I pulled the three of swords for your past pile one, there could've been a lot of loss and a lot of heartbreak cut out for you. Loss may have served as a large aspect of some of your greatest lessons. The loss of a parent to death or to outside third party obligations, the loss of a lover or many, the loss of approval or much-needed validation from outside sources, loss shaped the way things were laid out for you and was responsible for some of the behaviors or needs that you had for a long time. There's an essence of learning that is so incredibly significant to you here, you could've begun your life in a way where knowledge or the need for knowledge was heavily significant in your life, but I also see this idea of the primary purpose for your life events and circumstances was for you to learn important lessons early in order for you to become something great in your future. You could've had to grow up really fast, had to experience or see things or undergo drastic changes and hardships that people usually don't at such a large volume but you were made to survive and flourish. You're someone with a great purpose, you may be a healer or a light worker or someone who has a heavily significant gift even if your gifts aren't in the world of helping people along their ascension or things that fall into the metaphysical.
your present reality: you've reached a point within your journey where you've outgrown and broken all of your karmic cycles or successfully and fully completed the portion of your life that was heavily designed by the divine to teach you some of your most intense and powerful lessons, congratulations pile one. I almost said pile two, there may be messages for you in pile two. Last night in a reading I had said that there is a portion of someone's life in which their past life karma and the events in their lives and their experiences are heavily determined by what needs to be a part of their reality in order to reach the level of ascension needed to step into their higher self and fulfill their purpose. Sort of in the way in which we spend a large majority of our lives as minors in someone's care before we're considered legal adults and can go off on our own and create our own lives and stories. and This was exactly that. You've graduated or aged out of a space in time within your journey where your hardest lessons were that were meant to shape you.
You are at the beginning of your life, the world is yours. Some of you have just turned 19 years old or are newly adults. The number 19 is associated with perseverance, inner power, and finding your own path or finding your own spiritual path. The number 1 symbolizes the beginning and the number 9 symbolizes completion or near completion or the point in which someone is about to reach their highest level of completion or wholeness. You also have the ten of cups here indicating bliss, harmony, and alignment. This point is the calm after the storm that you have experienced, the ages of 6 and 7 may be incredibly significant for you as well and could've been the point in which certain karmic cycles or karmic energies began to flare up for you within your life.
You're at this extremely significant point in time, I see spirit or your spirit guides and ancestors opening up this huge door for you or you getting ready to walk through this gigantic door you've been waiting to enter for a long time. I see little you or someone being a teenager waiting in front of a door or sitting in front of a door. Someone had an ancestor or a spirit guide that always wanted to let you in early or always wanted to let you see what was on the other side even if you weren't ready yet someone's ancestor or spirit guide is very sorry that you had a hard time or had to go through so much, you have buckets of compassion in other realms for you pile one. Behind the door there is all of these opportunities, all of this abundance and all of these beautiful things for you to have and experience as compensation.
your future: in your future there's a lot of you using everything you've learned or everything you've experienced to keep you grounded or consistently moving in the right direction. Not out of a place of fear but out of a place of wisdom and knowing. You may also be someone who struggles with commitments in your life either emotionally or in the physical/material aspect of things and this is not going to be something that continues to hold you back I just heard "You'll find your way." or something along the lines of being able to put your money where your mouth is or stand fully in the things you want to accomplish will come to you eventually and you won't have to worry about this any longer if you worry about your productivity or your performance or your ability to take action and make things happen. You'll soon be seen as someone very disciplined who has things figured out and mapped out and you'll not only be seen that way but you'll be that person actually.
Some of you are young and may feel disappointed in yourself or having a hard time accepting that you are in fact young and there are skills or things you're not immediately good at or have to learn to do with time as you come into yourself due to the fact that you may be someone who is very grown up, wise or mature in a lot of areas. You are not behind. I just heard "allow yourself to grow." someone's ancestor or spirit guide thinks it's funny that you might get upset at the fact that you have a hard time. They see you as a baby in a suit lol. You may be unable to see just how much you have within your life or feel you crave more or don't get all the recognition you rightfully deserve within this lifetime to some extent here. You may fall into a practitioner role or be someone who teaches or creates a name for themselves through a leadership role or through something like divination. You'll be someone mysterious and sensual or someone who attracts the attention or curiosity of many. I just heard "friend of the world" or "mother" You may hold mystique and/or have a very high status patriarchal or matriarchal vibe. You may be well known in the world of the arts or there will be a worldly presence about you that you'll hold for the remainder of your life.
I pulled "The Daughter of Skulls" in the deck I'm using today and in essence, she represents infinite potential of life on earth. "steady and secure materialization. infinite potential. birth. completion. abundance. strength. tangible. earthly happiness. pure creation. opportunity. generous. beautiful. sensual. benevolent. arousal. adoration. truth. security. commitment. freedom. sensations. perfection. divine inspiration and holy wisdom. here is the message behind this card in the Tarot book for this deck:
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In your future, what you put out in the world you will receive in return in full capacity and you will give to the world a lot and the most valuable and most cherished things. Anything that comes from you or derives from you will be held at high regard and will be something of value. Your ideas, your guidance, your charity and even your children if you bless this world with any.
how you'll get there: value yourself and value your energy and your time and your essence. You are a person of high rare value and you must behave as such. Your first line of defense is always going to be you in the physical realm and world of the living and your second line of defense is your spirit guides and ancestors. You cannot receive the things you want in your life or get to where you want to be or be who your higher self is if you do not protect yourself in every sense there is. respect your legacy in the making. make choices according to where you want to go, be the energy you want to receive. your success in your life will come from you using your wisdom and using the respect you have for yourself and the love you have for yourself as your biggest weapon. People often see us the way we see ourselves when we have a very strong sense of identity whether or not it's a honest one or not. People will come to you because you're magnetic. Success will follow you because you're magnetic and it's safe in your hands. continue to nurture yourself and your energy and your persona. I don't even mean in the sense of who you present to others as an alter ego but your higher self or who you feel called to be. Love yourself, love your life, value your essence. easier said than done for most but if this message is yours you know exactly what means, looks like, feels like, sounds like, tastes like. Love is your sixth sense.
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ii.
your past: your childhood or past could've had a lot of stagnancy and suppression within it. There's something authoritative here or something that restricted someone's self-expression or was very judgmental and inflexible. this could be anything a parent or a legal guardian, a school system or a culture or a religion. Someone was a brilliant child or was someone with a lot of broad potential for many things who didn't get the freedom or ability to blossom or grow the way they rightfully deserved, there's a suppressed part of someone here that has been pushed into the shadow or has been lying dormant. you may have a difficult time making decisions in your life or have low self-esteem or an inability to think for yourself, express yourself or have a wicked case of imposture syndrome that tells you that you're not worth much or that you aren't capable of much but you're very powerful and very divine.
incredibly smart, have a psychic ability or an oppressed spiritual gift. someone told you that you were crazy or weird or led you in a direction or raised you up in a way that very heavily wounded your sense of self. this could also be a case of environmental oppression of the spirit, somewhere you once resided or the place you do reside and/or haven't moved away from didn't have the resources to accommodate you or help you. you may have a mental illness or a disability or have very heavy trauma that may impair you. There was some complication with the message that came through at first, I couldn't grasp it right away and I think this is reflective of the energy you may be in because something has cut you off or pushed you to lose something that was a naturally given birthright for you that you inherited from your ancestors or one in particular like a father or a grandfather or someone on your paternal line or a masculine energy. potentially one who passed away before your time. I pulled "The Lord of Knives" in the deck I'm using here's the message and essence behind the card:
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someone in your life could've known that you had a gift and took advantage of the fact that you were a child and may have had their own ideas about which direction they felt you were destined to go or put a lot of energy into suppressing your gifts or trying to break your spirit for fear you'd be entirely too difficult to control or be disobedient or out of jealousy for what you'd get in life or what you'd reap if you were allowed to grow into your power or be yourself. I see this could've been multiple people who chipped it to see you fall or have a hard time it may have started in the home or came from the home as well but it also was something you dealt with outside of your life, in your social life. Someone was afraid of fullness of conserved power in you.
your present reality: You're about to grow into yourself or at the brink of your ascension, you couldn't spent a lot of time in a stagnant place with many karmic behaviors and cycles, you could've fallen into addictions or fallen into some hard places or ran into a lot of karmic people and situations that were meant to shake you awake or act as major catalyst to put you on the right path. I hear someone saying that these were the cards you were dealt in terms of your past (both as a child and in your early life and in your recent past or in these past couple of years) and there isn't much you can do about that but you can use the cards you were dealt with to alchemize your self and learn the right lessons and find what you may have lost a long time ago. there's something significant here about your crown chakra being closed or you having a hard time learning lessons or taking the positives out of a negative situation or circumstance.
There was a recent catalyst that you've just experienced or are standing in at the moment that has been the last one for this block of time or this cycle of misfortune or hardship. You need peace and quiet or you need most at this time the ability to break away and turn inwards and soul search. It's about time some inner clarity on certain matters including the directory of your life and what you need to do come to you. you're about to rethink an idea or any clouded judgment you've had or carried with you about your sense of direction or where you needed to go, do, or be is about to clear. At this point in your life you're potentially in a place where you're juggling the persona you've been given or the one you've grown into to assimilate or that was in alignment with your choices and the life that goes with it and the person you really are and the life you are destined to have that's in alignment with who you truly are. this collective is always a really heavy one within my readings, you're always with me, I've practically grown up with you and now is your moment. I've always loved you and seen your light. it is now time you see it to and step into your power pile two.
You're in the process of regeneration and healing as well after a time long spent carrying with you wounds and skeletons. You're finally on the rise and about to reach your freedom. You're so close.
your future: I see you feeling and being victorious. a force to be reckoned with. people might actually believe you to be the golden standard of something or may idealize you or feel that you're glorious. You may be someone who is heavily put on a pedestal by their romantic partners and romanticized even to a point where you don't understand and they may become increasingly disappointed or have a hard time coming to terms with the fact that you're a real person with real flaws are can't possibly be everything they've chosen to try and make you out to be but I see this no longer being the case with anyone in the future in the sense that you will be everything and more. You may be heavily attracted to someone in your present life or be really infatuated or obsessed with someone in your present life who is a fantasy-like individual or has a really beaming sort of divinity that you wish that you could embody on your own and you will. You are divine and you will be divine and that will be the end of it. You'll be someone in the future who has a knack for improving themselves or finds great pleasure in self-improvement and pushing limits, even to the point of perfectionism it may work against you at some point but what it really does for you is set the standard for which you think you're worth and what you think you're capable of doing or accomplishing.
You may find that you'll be someone in the future and for a good amount of it who is a lone wolf or is seeking out a divine counterpart or someone to compliment you and bring to you your ten of cups or your divinely ordained commitment here or some sort of completion. I see you holding off for it and devoting a large amount of your energy towards your self-care and your physical world and career as you look for deep and divine commitment in your love life and partnerships. You may be someone who commands a lot of attention or that people desire to follow around or invest in deep commitments with but will find yourself not necessarily lonely but seeking something profound, at this stage in your ascension you'll have the ability to detect intention and what is in store for you and another individual intuitively. You could very well be a masculine energy or just someone who is very action-oriented and moves through their lives with a sense of fluidity. I pulled the "Prince of Scepters" here is the essence and description attached to this card from the book:
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how you'll get there:
focus on taking the time you need for yourself to thoroughly recover from the things you've experienced and allow yourself the time to make the changes you need to make to come into your power and refine who you need to be. Don't rush into commitments out of loneliness or force yourself to be around people just to keep company or just to make it seem like you are loved by others, it's okay to be alone or to use the time you have being alone for a productive cause that pertains to you, you're not selfish or wrong for it. Continue to grow and pour your energy into yourself. Love yourself enough to meet your own needs, love yourself enough to do things for the sake of your own nourishment, and stay far away from things that can destroy you out of craving or desire. take time to think about what you truly want and come into alignment with that by trusting that it exists and that it's available for you to have if that's truly what you want. the world is yours after such a long time of being denied it and it's time you align yourself with receiving it.
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iii.
your past: This may not be for the entire collective but it's likely there could've been some of you that could've experienced some violence or abusive environment even may have had someone in your life that was emotionally volatile that you could never truly please or had to walk on eggshells around. could've also been heavily oversexualized in your life as a child and during your teen years or general early life. there's a possibility someone could've attracted a lot of people who wanted to take from them or exploit them and did. Some of y'all could have experienced a lot of heartbreak from a young age or a lot of your needs not being met or your first heart break or massive bouts of betrayal from significant individuals like family members or like your parents and that could've heavily affected the way you behaved in front of others or how you navigated in the world. It's possible some of you could've developed a personality disorder or may struggle with mental health. You may have developed a tendency to lie to get approval or to get your way or obtain opportunities you don't believe you could receive if you were just yourself. lie or put on facades.
You may also have liked to party within the past couple of years or went through a lot to try and keep from being alone with yourself or being isolated or feeling alone. If it wasn't partying it was attempting to keep as many friends as possible or do what was necessary to keep as much attention as you felt you needed.
your present reality: you could be potentially dealing with a lot of energetic pressure in the heart space or undergoing a heart chakra awakening. You could be in and out of depression at this time potentially as well. Things from your past or past suppressed feelings or memories are resurfacing. if it's coming up, it needs to come out. You're learning what it means to love yourself and operate from a place of love instead of fear. You could be experiencing heavy emotions attached to codependency There could've been a loss or multiple. Of friends or lovers or both, people you may have heavily relied on past even a healthy point. relied on for various things, to regulate your emotions, validate your existence, or prove to you that you are loved or could be loved. There's also a potential you may have several uncut soul ties from past lovers and failed relationships, talking stages, or sexual rendezvous. You may have attempted to use your knowledge to cut them or severe them but it was somewhat unsuccessful.
You've been isolating yourself lately or having a lot of trouble being perceived or have developed a deep/deeper fear of being seen. You may have spent a lot of time off of social media or have been minimizing the amount you're willing to share about how you feel with "friends" and family. This could potentially serve as a way of being able to control your environment and what comes in and out of space so as not to trigger you. someone might be an air sign as well, you may not have the ability you may usually have to let things flow right through you or control the way you react to certain stimuli. You're bothered, triggered, or heavily emotionally sensitive or volatile at this time. You're undergoing a dark night of the soul and are in the process of waning in order to return in better shape soon. You're the last portion of the collection to undergo a full transformation. Some of you apart of this pile/collective are individuals who have younger spirits or haven't been on this early plane for very long or haven't lived multiple lives here.
You could have very youthful or childish energy or tendencies in your most authentic and natural state, you may look older or give the impression to others that you are older than you really are. You're in the process of healing the part of you that's karmic behavior may stem from a stunted place in your growth. learning how to properly navigate in the world and in your relationships, learning how to communicate properly, some of you may also be seeking out therapy or psych evaluations or may be placed in alignment to receive those types of mental health services.
your future: You'll be completely committed to the cause that is loving yourself and being the energy that you want to receive or manifest in all forms. Self love or insecurity may be something you have struggled with for the vast majority of your life so much so that a few of you have learned to heavily overcompensate or have developed an extremely inflated sense of self-importance that comes from a seemingly narcissistic place due to your past. learning how to do things authentically and from an honest place and not take short cuts or use your trauma as a way to cushion the fact that you may have some unhealed aspects of your shadow is something that you'll be learning to do and be determined to do.
You'll be in the process of challenging beliefs you've learned from your past or carried with you a long way and be in the state of learning and growing for a large amount of time for the earliest portion of your enlightened life. Any growing up you failed to do or limited mindset you've carried is what you'll primarily be working on. You may be disconnected spiritually or disconnected from spirit or God as well and your faith and purpose is something that you'll be working on or trying to find guidance through. You'll be entering your most in-depth spiritual journey or spiritual rebirth. You may have spiritual knowledge already but it comes from a limited place or the intention for learning isn't in the right place.
by the time you've completed this inner work and have come into alignment with your purpose and what you're meant to do within this lifetime you'll find yourself feeling relieved and having more room within yourself to build your life in such a way that will bring true fulfillment for you. You may have a tendency to heavily fixate on the physical or material world or the way your reality "appears" in the 3D and neglect your spirit, emotional/mental well-being, or internal affairs which has played a huge factor in your stunted growth and ability to operate and your future will begin itself with you having no choice but to shift your focus and find alignment internally before you can make anything come into rightful alignment in your physical life.
how you'll get there: you'll receive your highest reality by nurturing and healing the parts of you that need the most care and attention, which happens to be everything within and in spirit. There can be no true abundance or alignment if we don't bring into true order our internal aspects first. Be for your inner child who you would have wanted for them growing up. You are your first line of defense for your internal and vulnerable self and behind that is your spirit guides and ancestors. Your journey to your highest reality and your deepest place of alignment is going to be a lot of soul searching and a lot of inner work and growth and the effort that you put in to get yourself there. I pulled "The Daughter of Scepters" in the tarot deck I've chosen for this reading and here's the essence and meaning of the card for you to read:
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I also channeled the song "Tell Him" by Lauryn Hill, and "Him" as referred to in the song would be self (you).
Your greatest strength will be utilizing the natural free-spirited energy of your spirit, use it to allow yourself to embrace change and do the inner work to break karmic cycles and emerge out of stagnancy when it finds you.
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This reading took me so long guyss 😭😭 I broke it into two parts, I completed the first two piles that took me a couple of hours last night yesterday and then this morning I woke up with the intention to finish. I hope you found what you were looking for in this reading and it touched you!! I was unsure about the directory spirit took it in because I had envisioned it to be more of an entertainment type reading and be more surface level in its content but it turned out completely different. Bless you. 🤎
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dinogoofymutated · 10 months ago
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Blue over you - 97' Wolverine/Gn! Reader
Wolverine's not even my guy, and I finished this in a day! Haven't finished anything in a while, so this was an accomplishment! This was mainly inspired by the song Blue over you by mason ramsey, and Too sweet by hozier!
Let me know if Logan is to OOC. I'm trying my best to learn how to write for him!
Tw! Alcohol consumption, Light angst. Open-ending.
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You can’t sleep.
Maybe it was because of the excitement of the day, the stress from grieving the professor, or what you ate for dinner. Either way, it was nearly 1 am at this point, and your pursuit of rest was fruitless. You let out a frustrated sigh, sitting up in bed and rubbing your eyes. You wonder if you could convince Jean to help you out, but you’re sure she’s asleep right now, and you don't want to wake her up. Especially not after she announced her… condition, at dinner.
It’s not that you weren’t excited. In fact, you were over the moon for your friends. Jean and Scott are important to you, more like siblings to you than they ever were just friends or classmates. Even so, after the cheers and congratulations and the celebration… The news left you with a melancholy you couldn’t quite shake. A baby. Jean and Scott, two people you basically grew up with, are having a baby- and here you are. Alone. You don’t have a partner, or a husband, or any romantic prospects, really. You’ve spent so long learning about yourself and how to protect others, you just never let yourself open up to someone like that. Sure, you’d met many people during your time as an X-man, but you had always been a hopeless romantic, and there had only ever been one man you had things for. But even so, you just… couldn’t help but feel like you were falling behind.
After a long stretch, and another sigh, you get out of bed. Maybe a drink and some air would help. The path to the little china cabinet in your room is familiar and automatic. It was a gift from the professor when you mentioned that you missed collecting things like funny-shaped teapots and such, a habit you picked up from your grandmother. You wonder if he knew that you used the wooden bottom cabinets to store alcohol. You laugh a little when you think about if he kept the information to himself, letting you have at least one little secret. He most definitely knew, you decided. You grab a random bottle of amber liquid, unable to see the label in the dark. You shrug it off, figuring that you’ll find out what it is at some point.
The halls of the mansion are dark and quiet as you make your way over to the balcony, stepping outside and eagerly breathing in the cool air. Your eyes are starting to droop already as you turn to shut the door, but you've come this far and you figure you might as well get a drink in.
You're rubbing your eyes again as you turn back around, only to jump at the sight of a figure sitting on the railing.
“Fuckin’ Christ!” You wheeze. “Logan, you scared the shit out of me!” The mutant hums, the corner of his lips tilting just slightly before falling again. You walk over next to him, setting the bottle down at your feet as you lean against the railing.
“Can't sleep?” You ask. Logan shakes his head, and you frown at him. As gruff as the guy is, he’s normally more talkative. At least, with you he is. You can tell that something wrong, and it doesn't exactly take a telepath to understand what it is.
“...You were the one who found out, weren’t you?” You ask, almost state. Logan Huffs at your question, hopping off of the railing to pace on the balcony. He presses his palms into his eyesockets, growling just slightly in frustration.
“Her smell was off. S’been off. Didn’t think anything of it until I heard the heartbeat.” He rumbles, setting his arms down. “Don’t know if I want to strangle Scott or throw him off of the roof of the mansion.” Logan’s hands flex in a way you know he’s just dying to unsheath his claws. You’re not entirely sure what to say at first as he sighs, and sits up against the far wall. He rests his head in his hands, and it hurts to see him like this. You open your mouth, before closing it again. You glance down at your feet, picking up the bottle you had grabbed earlier.
Logan doesn't seem to mind as you sit next to him, brushing against his shoulder. You screw off the top of the liquor, taking a swig straight out of it before offering him the bottle. It burns deliciously on the way down, and you smile cheekily as he raises an eyebrow at you. Nevertheless, the takes the bottle from you, hand brushing your own.
“You’re not gonna like it, by the way.” You laugh. Logan rolls his eyes, less than a ghost of a smile on his face.
“ ‘still liquor, ain’t it?” He hums, taking a swig. His face screws up as he swallows, holding the bottle out afterward to try and read the label.
“What is this?” He asks, disgusted. You can’t help but laugh at him as he gives you a tired look.
“Butterscotch Schnapps.” You answer him. “I told you that you weren't gonna like it, it’s too sweet for you.” Logan shakes his head, almost trying to get rid of the taste as he hands the bottle back and playfully shoves your shoulder.
“Not my fault you drink shitty liquor.” He grins. You feel a flutter in your chest as you smile back at him, taking another swig to mask whatever he could possibly pick up from you- The problems of pining for a man with super senses, you think, laughing slightly at your own thought.
“Guess it’s all for me then-” you start to joke, right before Logan snatches the bottle back.
“Gimme the damn bottle.” You’re giggling a little at this point as the alcohol starts to settle in just slightly. Logan rolls his eyes, still smiling as he takes another swig despite the fact he very clearly hates it.
The two of you go back and forth like this for a while. Take turns until the bottle is run dry. Your giggles have settled down, and the infamous wolverine has relaxed as you lean against him. The two of you sit in silence for a minute or two, both simply breathing in the cool night air.
“It’s okay, you know.” You mumble at some point. Logan, able to hold his liquor a lot better than you, cocks an eyebrow. He’s not sure if you even know you're talking at this point. You look like you’re bout to fall asleep, nuzzling against his shoulder with a pout on your face. He hums questioningly in response.
“It’s okay to hurt knowing that Jean’s pregnant.” Logan had almost forgotten about that, having been caught up in this moment. His face falls immediately, and he looks away from you, staring into the trees that surround the mansion. You feel your chest squeeze painfully, but either due to the drink or due to your lack of self-awareness, you continue talking. He needs to hear it, you drunkenly decide.
“It’s hard to watch someone you love be with someone else. It’s even harder to watch them move on without you. I know it hurts to watch her move on to the next stage of life without you. But at this point, the best thing you can do for her is support her because you love her, not covet what you wish you could have.” You know you sound like you’re drunkenly rambling, and maybe you are, but really, all of this is something you wish you could have said years ago. You’re sure you sound like Nightcrawler, talking about coveting and love and righteousness, but you’re not as much of a good person as Kurt is. You know that you’re no better than Logan, Pining after him for so long as he continues to pine for someone else. To be perfectly honest, You’re jealous of Jean. You’re jealous of her relationship, her happiness. You’re jealous of the fact that if she would turn around and throw everything away to be with Logan, he would take her in without a second thought. But she’s your friend. Your sister. You love her, and you cherish her happiness much more than you could ever resent her for it. You let out a pitiful chuckle, eyeing the last minuscule drop in the liquor bottle.
“Believe me, I would know.” You mumble. Logan’s brow furrows, taken aback by that. You’ve always been such a standalone, unbothered, always positive. It didn’t make sense to him.
“What do you mean by that?” He asks, but when he turns his head to look at you, you’ve fallen asleep against his shoulder.
The next morning, you wake up in your bed with one hell of a hangover. You groan at the light that drifts through your blinds, rolling over. When you finally open your eyes, you're greeted by the sight of a glass of water, and a bottle of painkillers. You’re confused at first, and then flooded with bashfulness and embarrassment when you realise who exactly had put them there. You roll onto your stomach, shoving your face into your pillow, unable to handle the embarrassment of knowing you said WAY too much last night. You can't help but smile a little though, knowing he must've cared enough to carry you back here and get you meds.
Maybe it wasn't all bad.
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