#communities I want more representation of

[chryza]

Actually while my brain is on the subject I just want to gush about Executor for a moment because he is such a good and nuanced representation of an autistic person. At first glance he seems to be the pretty standard white male savant trope, but his character was really fleshed out with Executor the Ex Foedere and his appearances in Hortus and Zwillingstürme (and the prelude manhua).

I don’t think his icy, robotic exterior is cultivated, but I also think he was never given the chance to develop anything else. In a world where everyone around you can feel each other’s emotions (if they’re Sankta of course), to be cut off from that entirely? Of course he came to the conclusion that emotional expression was unnecessary or meaningless. He was never understood, he did not speak their language, so to say. And that very literal distance between him and the other Sankta is such a good representation of how it can feel to have autism. How many of us described it like a wall between us and the rest of the world, that we were only ever looking into?

And sure, he’s ruthlessly logical and straightforwardly blunt, but to mistake that for a lack of depth or a lack of feeling at all is not only incorrect, it’s sort of what he’s dealt with his entire life. Hortus de Escapismo especially highlighted a more tender, emotional side of Federico that soothes my wounded heart. He acts on feeling, without understanding why, he shows compassion and true empathy to the people of Sanctiliminium Ambrosii. He’s good with children because he treats them with the respect that children so desperately crave (which again is a very common experience amongst autistic people). What seems at first like a blank slate is simply a canvas in colors others refuse to see.

And that’s why I think Arturia is so important to him. She never treated him like he was any different, she saw the heart of what he was trying to say, she accepted and embraced his idiosyncratic behavior. And of course Arturia is a thousand more essays. But I will say I don’t think Federico missed that shot accidentally. Someone else maybe would have missed out of a lack of skill or being caught off guard by Arturia, but not him.

I think he really speaks to the heart of an aspect of autistic representation that is so often sorely missing—the struggle of existing in a world you feel cut off from. Trying to breach the barrier between yourself and others, to reach out and communicate in a way that matters. I wouldn’t say he feels any sort of grief about it, but you can feel him desperately clawing through the walls of reason he’s constructed around himself at the end of Hortus. It is a deeply human struggle. They don’t have to say on paper that he’s autistic. His entire story is one that so many autistic people know intimately as their own.

[doodler16]

LONGGG ask ahead.

I feel like Viv just doesn’t understand sex outside of funny haha bdsm ‘daddy’ jokes.

Especially the Helluva short where Blitzo says he’s a top and therefore is bad at oral. What?????? That’s not how it works???? I wish I had more examples but I think the general vibe of sex only being used for power dynamics is present in both HH and HB. Blitzo’s sa threat to moxie (and millie) in an early episode, the way Stolas cheating with a lower class imp is first used to show that he’s a bad guy and that blitzo is desperate BUT this is later almost retconned to make it into a cutesy toxic yaoi love story and cheating is suddenly okay. Fizz and Ozzie’s relationship I just can’t take seriously when it’s reduced Fizz into a sub gay twink stereotype (‘pwease big daddy?’ Ughhh stfu). Side tangent but I was so happy to see representation of a disabled person with agency and success, until he started being babied by the narrative and acts totally different especially in the Mammon episode. They make Mammon look bad for sexualising Fizz and bodyshaming, which is a good message about toxic bosses, until you remember that Blitzo has done that and much worse to his employees.

This is just as bad in HH, the Angel and Val thing is just disturbing. Like I can forgive slightly bad writing but hiring a known proshipper with an SA kink to storyboard the scenes of a SA VICTIM BEING ABUSED is fucking insane. Viv doesn’t care about representation, kink isn’t just about being edgy and dangerous during sex and it feels like she just doesn’t understand the history behind it. Making the sin of lust himself say he cares about consent just to make your character look good (because she suddenly decided she wanted him to be a dom sugar daddy instead of an actual bad guy), but then you also approve of showing SA in your shows as a joke, especially when it’s used against characters that are seen as more pathetic (moxxie and sir pentious). Vivz gets off to negative power dynamics and seems to fetishise abuse of power. Pretty obvious considering the disturbing SA scene playlist she had on her old YouTube channel.

Also Stolas is like a textbook r*pist imo, the self pitying and ‘well I WANTED it to be consensual!’ And whatever. When you’re in that position of power you have a responsibility to not abuse that. At the start of the show it was fine because they weren’t trying to make a moral message or paint him as a good guy, but clearly they had to retcon so much just to make it work when they wanted him to be a innocent twink. The retcon to make Stolas and Blitzo childhood friends, making Stolas a desperate poor baby who doesn’t know how to communicate and he actually ALWAYS totally loved Blitzo. Sure. But really if you just watch the show without any background knowledge, Stolas looks like a creep. And Viv had to justify everything Stolas did while making Blitzo, the victim in this dynamic, into the bad guy who totally also loves Stolas (despite clearly not being into him until they wanted to change things in the end of s1) and he’s in the wrong for disliking the upper class demons who mistreat them.

Viv seems to see kink as consensual abuse in a way. She doesn’t understand how sexual dynamics work. And she fetishises toxic relationships without thinking critically of what she’s really saying. Double standards between SA jokes and SA storylines. I’d even say that making Val a character people can get attached to and buy merch of is kinda icky, because yes irl r*pists can be charming to others, but clearly Viv wasn’t saying anything interesting with his character’s portrayal. She just wanted someone to abuse her favourite OC and make sure her close proship friends can get off to it while disregarding how victims may respond to it.

It’s a sort of conservative way of seeing kink culture and queer culture in general imo. The p*rn industry has already normalised fetishising abusive power dynamics but against women much more often. Viv is just doing that but between two male characters instead. Also did Chaggie get any sort of sexual stuff idk. I don’t think so, I can hardly remember any f/f relationships in her work.

Sorry for the long rant I just have so many thoughts on it ahh and I wanna see if people agree and have more in depth talk on it. Viv stop letting your p*rn addiction ruin your show 💔

Vivziepop shouldn’t be surprised when people meme on her when it comes to her lame sex and swearing jokes 😭 There is a lot of it that you can make a complication video of it.

Short 2 “Mission Antarctica” was so dumb especially with Blitzø and the crystal. “I’ve never been good at this shit.” That such a lie, when has Blitzø sucked at lust? Especially when the show goes out of its way to establish that Blitzø not only scored a literally pop star, a goetia prince, and hundreds of hellborn who were at Verosika’s party complaining about him.

Yeah, you are right Anon. Thats not how it works, just because you are a top doesn’t mean you are automatically bad at oral sex and doesn’t help how they establish Blitzø to be this attractive person who is able to get most people or use his charms as an advantage in a tough situation. I know this scene is a joke but Blitzø easily could’ve accessed the crystal.

The fact that Blitzø gets away with sexual assaulting and threatening Moxxie and by extension Millie is insane. He never actually apologizes to them and proceeds to call out Mammon for doing similar things he did to Moxxie and Millie. And it never crosses Blitzø’s mind or forces him to realize that he’s a hypocrite too.

Don’t get me wrong that scene where Blitzø defends Fizzarolli from Mammon multiple times is sweet but at the same time why should I take it seriously when it used as a punchline for a character like Moxxie. It’s the same issue with Angel Dust and Sir Pentious.

Vivziepop wants us, the audience to emphasize and sympathize with Angel Dust getting raped and abused by Valentino. But in the same breath makes a joke about Sir Pentious getting raped off screen and some fans making excuses that “it’s Hell.” At this point, why should I care about Angel Dust’s situation if some people are willing to let a scene like this slide.

I mean Vivziepop was arguing with a bunch of SA survivors on Instagram Threads about episode 4 of Hazbin Hotel (before the full episode got out). 😂

Fizzarolli and Ozzie are something to say the least. Their relationship can be summed up by “Sugar daddy Ozzie dominates wittle Fizzarolli.” They had a joke at the end of Mammon special episode that Ozzie tops Fizzarolli, that’s how un-subtle they are about their dynamic.

I like Fizzarolli and somewhat latch on to him and relate to him regarding his disability but the man (who is in his 30s) is babied and coddled especially by Ozzie that I unironically miss his edge and fierceness from season 1. That Stoliz childhood plot was so useless, then meeting as a children made the Stoliz ship unironically look worse and was useless. You aren’t slick Vivziepop, I see you with the children Stoliz merch, trying to make it look like they were friends when in reality they aren’t. 😂

No Anon, Chaggie didn’t have any sexual content in season 1 compared to ships like Ozzie/Fizz and Stoliz. Even Millie/Moxxie and Valentino/Vox had more “spicy” content than Chaggie. The closest thing Chaggie did was have a soft kiss on the lips in episode 8. Apparently, in season 2 something “fun” and “spicy” will happen between Chaggie.

[acesandocs]

A while ago Calamity told me they headcannon Joey as being of Norwegian decent and I wholeheartedly approve. So here’s Ace helping Joey get into his bunad.

Putting on a sølje is easier when someone else does it for you and its a neat way to have Åse and Joey interact. It ended up looking kinda domestic so now the discord server is down with ÅsexJoey lol, sure why not.

Heres a link to the first post i made about what a bunad and a fest drakt is. if anyone wants to read about it but all you need to know is they're for the most part different things and Ace's outfit is a festrdrak and Joey's is technically a bunad.

on Joeys outfit:

According to Calamity: ‘’I imagine his parents immigrated to the US with his grandparents when they were still young and then met in the US through community’’ which could probably put the time they emigrated around the middle of the 1800s. The modern idea of bunads didn't start appearing until the start of the 1900s and kept developing from there. So most likely his family wouldn't have any bunads to pass down, but maybe some clothes that could be put together to make a bunad.

So I based Joey's on the Oslo 1892 bunad. (Its almost the exact same except for the number of buttons) which was invented post 2010s but was based on fashion from the wealthy in 1890s. Considering the hypothetical time line of when Joey’s family emigrated the suit jacket and vest probably didn't come with them from Norway but the knit socks, søljes and pants could.

The silver jewelry on his neck is called a sølje, i gave him two different types. One is based on the sølje that usually comes with the Oslo 1892 but with a few artistic liberties. The second is a heart sølje that looked like a heart with either a crown or two birds facing each other above it. It was used all over the country but some places more than others like the more southern parts of the country. It was also often a gift given to a lover, maybe it was something one of his grandparents gave to the other.

on Ace's outfit:

I have already designed a fest drakt/bunad for Ace and in that post I mentioned I couldn't find an outfit from the area to base it one so I took some innspo from the Telmark bunad instead because of the color and embroidery that I felt matched Ace’s personality. I did eventually stumble upon a bunad from the are Ace grew up in. The Toten bunad, so I redesigned her Fest drakt based on it. Its not a one to one copy so its technically still a festdrakt.

I still got to add some embroydery but instead its svartsøm on the shirt (or whats supposed to be a simplified representation of it). The apron and band around the waist are woven in a style called tavlebragd which gives it that geometric pattern.

I also gave Ace a headband this time around since her hair is to short to braid when she’s older. So now she still has something going on with her hair. Its just a normal green hair band. Would have added embroidery to it if her design wasn't getting a bit cluttered with all the patterns.

I could explain away the difference in Åse’s festdrakt by saying her old one got lost when they emigrated but idk. I might come back to it and design a new one for her younger self at some point.

As mentioned in the first post im not a clothing historian so some of this might be wrong. I tried simplifying some of th patterns on aces outfit so theyd be easie to redraw so they might not be 100% accurate. I know I also could have just designed a new outfit for joey like I did with ace instead oif basing his on a bunad that wasn't even invented before the 2000s but it takes a lot of energy and research and I’m tired.

[aeimygdala]

I'mm more awake now, so:

YES, EXACTLY, TO BOTH. Describing how accurately it reflects every other queerbaiting with male characters really drives it home. For some reason, I've also been thinking about the kids shows Victorious and Sam and Cat queerbaiting, too. It wasn't until reviewing it as an adult that I realized they knew full well that their audiences cared and were invested in these female relationships as romantic. They knew what they were doing, and that's really what defines queerbaiting.

It's like, 20years ago the WWDITS writers would've faced a LOT of backlash for so many sex jokes about people being bisexual simply bc being LGBTQ was still just being treated as something so ugly and wrong in the 2000s, even in a rated R show. And they have more freedom Now to make jokes about gay sex without the joke relying on disgust or other homophobic drivel. And I will say wholeheartedly that I think Guillermo being gay was handled quite nicely and earnestly! Like, genuinely!

... But note how that was done After they got a bunch of articles and realized a bunch of LGBTQ fans were invested because it seemed like "Oh, the showrunners acknowledge we exist and don't see us as subhuman, so maybe they'll do more with us" and because an actually gay man, a member of our community, was playing a major role and had his thoughts about his character's feelings

But is it really the queer representation we want when besides Guillermo, it's just stock variety "depraved/promiscuous bisexuality"? They got all this credit and hype for being so "queer-friendly" long before they confirmed Guillermo was gay Because of those jokes.

it's not groundbreaking just bc they're happy to say "yeah these people aren't all washboard straight," and I think too many people thought it was because we'd been directly lead to believe there'd be romantic payoff with two of the main male characters. That WOULD'VE meant something. Like it would've meant something in every fucking other show that queerbaited two main characters like this. This one really stings because the main Changes and Development happen regarding Guillermo and Nandor's relationship!

Now we know all of that stuff we saw as rep was just jokes about how funny it is when people are sexually free and don't understand or care about modern day homophobia. That wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, just kinda obnoxious, but it really is an ugly look when they've spent this long shipbaiting.

Men being in complicated but very openly gay relationships just doesn't suit the show's "Sense Of Humor" but Nadja and Lazlo's marriage always gets to be heartwarming. and there got to be plenty of nice moments of growth.

The writers really took nothing they wrote seriously when they didn't want to, which is also what really killed the show this final season. WE'RE the fools for expecting something serious and better from the "vampires are out of touch and insane" show because obviously that's all it ever was, to them, unless they wanted otherwise, and they didn't when it came to this. But they'd be happy to bait us with whatever made us watch it. They knew what they were doing, and they knew they didn't respect the audience and the LGBTQ following the show had garnered.

So, still queerbaiting. Because they mostly treated LGBTQ people as a marketable audience and a subject of half their sex jokes (specifically, mostly bisexuals.) Or they saw every person hoping for Guillermo and Nandor to get together as an obnoxious person unable to see or enjoy the show past shipping, which, like, I'm the first person to say that people NEED to be able to enjoy media without fixating on shipping, but people picking up what they're Deliberately putting down Isn't That. People Caring and following the writing of a thing they're watching isn't That.

And I don't really enjoy fanfics, I just wanted to see what felt like a really messy Rollercoaster of a relationship and how it changes and improves between two lead mlm and pay off in a show that isn't explicitly about gay romance, because actually seeing that in media matters. It means LGBTQ people aren't jokes!

Honestly, I would've been irritated but accepted it ending the way it did if they hadn't put the whole hypnosis ending thing. It would've been one last annoying wink at the camera with no Canon payoff, but it wouldn't have been the writers showing their asses and mocking everyone who wanted to see the two together, telling us what we wanted was a different show. It's just so mean spirited.

I'm still glad I watched the series and Guillermo being queer really does matter a lot, but it doesn't mean they didn't know what they were doing.

I think the thing people aren't acknowledging about WWDITS is that yeah the main characters are all queer. And yet, the only established and long lasting main couple is M/F, regardless of how many jokes are made about them also being queer. im not saying bi/pan m/f rep isnt important, but it is relevant to note. most of the mentions of other characters being queer (besides Guillermo being gay) are basically "promiscuous bisexuality is funny and surprising" when you actually think about them seriously. I actually hated everything with lazlo's dad, ngl. looking back at the entire shitfest of season 6, it feels like everyone gives its "representation" too much credit when defending its shipbaiting. like you understand this was intentional, and it's obvious the intent was never to actually deliver on queer relationships long term, even if it gives us queer characters? like, it's cool that you have queer characters, but are you doing to deliver on what you've been implying regarding them?

we get heartwarming moment after heartwarming moment with Lazlo and Nadja. idk I don't think it's Evil but I think a lot.of us collectively gave it too much credit for how much it actually gave a shit. it's a sitcom, and it made it soo clear, and we're pissed at realizing it.

idk, but looking back, a lot of shipbaiting and jokes reslly feel kind of mean-spirited and mocking. like we know you CAN write meaningful relationships, everything with nandor and Guillermo this season was leading up to the extreme improvement in their relationship and interactions, soooo.

I think people who are pissed really deserve to be bc it really leaves a bad taste in your mouth bc you KNOW. the shipbaiting was deliberate. n we'd rather be funny here than actually deliver on queer relationships and happiness. and it's always been that way, and that isn't EVIL or anything , I guess, and it's fine, but it sucks that I gave it too much credit thinking otherwise because I want happy m/m relationship rep or something lol

feels like a slap in the face to people who just wanted something nice!!! I'm not a shipper, I don't exist in the wwdits Fandom, I'm just a queer fan that was eagerly hoping they'd actually have a payoff for all they were doing!!

[voidwithtoomanygooglyeyes]

Communities I want to see represented (more) in media

Agender community

Xenogenders

Neopronouns

Therians (or just the altherhuman/non-human community in general)

AroAllo people (aromantic allosexual)

A-spec identities that aren't just aromantic and asexual (e.g. demiromantic, greysexual, aroflux, demisexual)

Polyamorous people

Queerplatonic relationships

Religions other than Christianity

Gender-non-conforming trans people

Intersex people (thank you @prudr-ragr077 I was going to add this originally but forgot)

[attackofthe50footidiot]

Happy pride month! Remember, the borrower in your wall uses they/them. There is a human girl kissing her giant girlfriend and they’re both giggling because neither of them know how to kiss. Somewhere a giant is taking his testosterone and being brave about the needle. A fisherman is sneaking off to see his kraken boyfriend. Multi size polycule.

[scholar-of-yemdresh]

As this year comes to a close here's hoping for more (I.e. any) Morally grey aroace protagonists in (adult) fiction. Because as much I love Ymir by Rich Larson, I can't just keep reading one book over and over again. I'm starving for Dirtbag Aces in media.

[cosmicredcadet]

every time i see a post that is like "ughh why cant we have aspec characters who aren't aroace for once" I have to do a double take like "is the aroace rep in the room with us right now?" because genuinely....where is all this aroace rep y'all are complaining about? Why cant i find it yet it's apparently the only aspec rep we get?? You admit that TV never says the word aromantic so where is the aroace rep. So far I've pretty much only seen canonically asexual characters and not much else buddy.

[gurorori]

as much as the argument of 'aros can still date/aces can still have sex' is important to keep in mind because of technicalities and the people who those stamensts do apply to, something i always felt is it slowly starts sounding a lot like 'hey we're not like totally weird and unlike the rest, like some of us still do The Thing okay? we totally still can do The Thing! not so different after all!' and that always made me feel a bit icky. like as if you're trying to justify the identities even existing in the first place, as if you're bargaining

asexuality and aromanticism are both meaningful identities and deserving of recognition and respect, regardless of if they can still replicate or engage in expected societal frameworks of behaviour

[mlm-rep]

Frank "Frankie" Hines from Fellow Travelers is mlm!

[nag-mamahal]

As a romantic asexual I headcanon just about every single character (and ship) I like as asexual/on the ace spectrum. I just feel there's not enough representation of non-sexual beings engaged in romantic love in popular media. I'd really love it if more stories explored good and fulfilling partnerships that thrive even without sexual intimacy. I'm not against characters being sexy or having sex I think it's just really neat when figures can exist and fall in love without a big part of the relationship revolving around fucking. I love when people, ace or not, can explore their sexuality on their own terms and set boundaries that are accepted and respected by their partners. I love when they realize they're more than their body and what their body is able to provide in terms of sexual fulfillment. I love emotional intimacy independent of the pressure of sex.

[aph-estonia]

i've been a furry for 8+ years and i STILL don't have a fursona. representation for fursona-less furries matters!

[brittlebutch]

realizing that it sounds kind of mean for me to be referring to this fic as the “cringe loser” fic if you don’t have the extensive lexicon i’ve created in my head for the lengthy opinion essay i haven’t written about how most people don’t actually want “good” autist-rep, they want “cool” rep even at the expense of ‘accuracy’. just believe me i say “cringe loser” with the highest degree of absolute affection

[pennyserenade]

seeing the name pedro pascal in the running for awards is something that is so so so so so so so so so so special to the little girl in me who could not comprehend where in this world i belonged with this identity i've been given. i joke all the time about how, as a child, my only representation was in spy kids, but that's not entirely too far from the truth of it. its not only that pedro pascal is latino, but it is the fact that he is unapologetically latino, not changing his name or hiding any part of his identity to get where he is now. you don't know what representation like this means for people who've never had it. it is wonderful and i'm so happy to be in his corner for all of this

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

Was on a panel of autistic college students last night and the last person who asked us a question asked about our special interests and I’m ✨💕💖 about it

[not-poignant]

Hi, Pia! I am thinking of going the same route as you - free chapters on AO3, then Patreon - for my historical m/m romance projects. Could you share a little about your journey, and how did you manage to gain visibility within the originals section of AO3 (I know it's not easy)?

Hi hi!

We've talked a little over at Subscriptions for Authors I think! *waves* :D

Okay firstly, i don't know if any of this is going to be very helpful, because to tl;dr it - I didn't set out to be a professional author when I started this, and I wasn't even trying to be a professional when I started my Patreon (though I did approach it seriously, like I wanted to treat my readers well). I didn't believe I could be one, my impostor syndrome was so epic I literally started an entirely new AO3 account and kept it secret from my main account because I believed all the people being nice to me about my writing were somehow just lying to me because they felt sorry for me.

That's...

That's a whole lot of impostor syndrome insanity. But I've always been pretty honest about having mental illness so....

Re: my journey...

I started out in fanfiction. I started writing Rise of the Guardians fanfiction (a two part serial called From the Darkness We Rise & Into Shadows We Fall) and it went viral (I did not expect this) and I put in several original characters to flesh out the world, because I added a Seelie/Unseelie Court element that wasn't in the original movie or the books.

Two of those original characters had roles as semi-significant ensemble characters. One was a terrible villain who is defeated by the other, who is the Seelie King (also defeated by the main characters of the fic but *coughs* anyway).

I started getting people asking me what was going to happen to those two characters, especially once people found out they had a relationship history together prior to the events in the fanfic. I mostly put those people off - I fully intended to keep just writing fanfiction - until finally I decided to write some fic of those two characters. It was like...revenge hatefucking, lmao. I wrote three chapters of that, and then more, and then finally realised I couldn't give them the tragic ending I'd planned to, and that I'd have to actually figure out how the hell to save them from their own machinated doom.

And that became the first book in my original Fae Tales series - Game Theory.

It was my amazing readers who asked me to make this Tumblr, my amazing readers who asked me to write that original story, and they were the ones who asked me to make a Patreon (and then a Ko-Fi), and so in a way, they were the ones who let me know when I was ready to try making this work in a (slightly) more official capacity. They were the ones who believed in me enough to keep me doing this, and they still are. *waves to you all*

They were the ones who gave me visibility, I don't know that I did anything specific to make that happen, except writing the stories, turning up, and listening to them.

It's a very weird way of doing it and I don't know that anyone else has ever done it quite that way like this. I feel like a massive outlier in that sense. I don't relate to anyone who is starting out in professional subscription with no readers because I could never do that, my lack of confidence wouldn't let me. But there's aspects I think any author can replicate: I reply to all my commenters (except the trolls), because they're great and I want to support connection, community, and conversation. I embrace fandom and love all transformative works, and also, like 99% of my writing is free on AO3. (You don't have to make everything free, but it certainly doesn't hurt on AO3).

I mostly finish my serials and folks can trust my happy/hopeful endings and they can trust my hurt/comfort. And I'm pretty communicative! As you can tell by how much I'm rambling right now x.x I intentionally provide a safe space for queer people and neurodivergent people as much as possible, and write a lot of representation for us. I set out to make a space I would personally feel comfortable in. That might not work for everyone, but it works for those who stay.

From there though, I'd say a lot of visibility came from word of mouth, writing chapter by chapter over time (serials naturally pick up readers simply because they're often at or near the top of a tag or fandom category on AO3 - there is NO algorithm there), sometimes sorting by kudos, and me just posting about random stuff on Tumblr with good tags.

I still write fanfiction on another account (my impostor syndrome account) that has also had some people trying my original fiction. There's quite a few people who came directly from fanfiction to the original fiction because the themes were the same!

I didn't have the confidence to intentionally try and be a professional writer. When I started writing that fanfic I was writing it because I was depressed, sad, and I'd quit an unsatisfying job as a professional artist (I loved the art and my clients, I could never make the income part work). I didn't want to be a professional writer. I was writing as hooky, as escape from my real life, and as 'oh god I just need some hurt/comfort and I can't find what I want so I'll write it.'

To this day, I still write fanfiction as an escape, it's partly why it's now on a separate account to my original stuff (but even plenty of my original fic is indulgent and self-escapist in nature, which is maybe why other people find it escapist and cathartic as well).

In writing, financially, it makes more sense to publish books, or do serials-into-books, and develop a backlist of novels alongside the serials. I don't do that. I should, I plan on starting soon. I can point out a lot of the things that I either did wrong, or that I can see a way of doing better, because I didn't set out to be a professional writer, and I still put 'keeping it fun' and 'the readers' ahead of 'making money.' I'm not very mercenary and I make financially not great decisions in favour of 'but I enjoy it more this way.'

(That's partly because I am really very ill, and I can't afford to make myself sick through my work, and not enjoying it is the fastest way to do that).

What I do know is how to help create a community, though. And how to encourage and try and care for that community of people. How to respond to what they want and sometimes don't want, alongside what I want and don't want. How to have boundaries in that space. Well, I'm still figuring it out but I think I'm more comfortable with it than I used to be!

I also don't want to make it sound like I didn't know about writing before this. Long before doing serials for 10 years, I did creative writing and scriptwriting (among other things) at university. I wrote very technically correct short stories with sad little tragic endings that won awards and sometimes decent cash prizes. I hated it, and it put me off writing for years afterwards. I felt trapped in trying to write the 'correct' way. I am entirely unsurprised that to this day I reject standard formulas for novel lengths, and that in order to write, I kind of have to break a lot of the rules I was taught.

But I was taught how to write 'correctly' by Australian standards back in the early 00s (very spare, evocative prose). These days I follow a lot of scriptwriting / television drama beats in serials and have always really enjoyed doing it that way. :D

I'm meant to be talking about some of this in the Subscriptions for Authors podcast tomorrow and it's going to be a mess, as you can tell, lmao.

(There's something to be said about the lightning-in-a-bottle moment where I just wrote a fanfic I thought everyone would hate in a popular fandom and people were just ready for that story and it took off. I had no idea how to deal with it and it was very overwhelming and I had a bit of a breakdown a year and a half later over it. It's no coincidence that a year into the Patreon I paused it for 1.5 years and walked away because I couldn't handle it. But then I did some growing up and came back and figured it out.

But yeah I didn't do any of this the right way, or in a super intentional way. The only part I know I did well was supporting a community, and communicating with the people who turned up. And I did that for very selfish reasons - I wanted to be in a community, and I enjoyed meeting people who had things in common with me. I sometimes feel a little like a gremlin who just stumbled into a community and was like 'oh, um, I'm here, I guess.'

It's really everyone else who made it magical, but it did help that I think I am (in retrospect) pretty good at writing a hooky, addictive serial for the right kinds of readers. I cannot understate this enough -> learning how to write serials and exploring episodic television drama can be very helpful).