#commodore records

[kickmag]

Throwback: Billie Holiday-Strange Fruit

Billie Holiday recorded "Strange Fruit" in 1939 and performed it at New York's first integrated nightclub, Café Society. Abel Meeropol wrote "Strange Fruit" as a poem in 1937 under the name Lewis Allan in response to a photograph taken by Lawrence Beitler of African-American boys J. Thomas Shipp and Abraham S. Smith hanging from trees on August 7, 1930, in Marion, Indiana. Holiday was signed to Columbia Records and they would not let her record "Strange Fruit" for fear of a southern backlash. Holiday's friend, Milt Gabler, the owner of Commodore Records, agreed to release it on his label so Columbia gave Holiday a one-session release. She re-recorded the song in 1944 but the 1939 recording sold one million copies and became her best-selling single. Holiday was initially concerned about retaliation for recording "Strange Fruit" but she did it anyway because it reminded her of the life-saving medical treatment her father was denied because of racism.  The poetic description of Black bodies, blood, and trees was haunting and her performance of it made audiences stand still. When she sang it at Café Society the lights were dimmed and you could only see her face. At the end of the performance, the audience looked up and she was gone before the stage lights were restored. Holiday's unique way of phrasing and improvisation is one of the reasons why her version of "Strange Fruit" is still the most popular after decades of new covers. 

"Strange Fruit" has been called the "song of the century" and  "the beginning of the Civil Rights Movement." Emmett Till's lynching has always been credited as the real start of the movement but "Strange Fruit"'s release two years before his birth was the most egregious artistic statement about Jim Crow America. 

Holiday died in 1959 after a tumultuous career as a jazz and pop vocalist innovator. Diana Ross received an Oscar nomination for her portrayal of Holiday in the 1972 film Lady Sings The Blues. Andra Day starred as the singer in Lee Daniels' 2021 film The United States vs. Billie Holiday. 

[yellowmanula]

So, as you probably know, I'm heading abroad in July to earn my bread. Unfortunately, the dear lady I was caring for in Krakow passed away last night. Amidst the backdrop of this dreadful departure for me, the question of how to make ends meet for the next three months lingers. Remember, I'm selling postcards, vinyl records, and t-shirts—those small amounts I make really do wonders in the short term and help me get by. And let me tell you, these items are truly unique. Feel free to support me and by some stuff :)

[thepermanentrainpress]

Gallery: The Struts @ Commodore Ballroom - Vancouver, BC Date: November 27, 2023 Photographed by: Josh Papalia

[myvinylplaylist]

Commodores: In The Pocket (1981)

Lionel Richie's last recording as a member of the band

Motown Records

[thosesharpnotes]

Commodores – Commodores (Motown – M7-884R1, 1977) It’s not what the drum into is, it’s what it isn’t. The Commodores belong on your turntable this summer (even though it’s still technically spring). Get an early start and let the Commodores be your guide. News flash: the poster isn’t really autographed by the band, but you’re familiar enough with corporate marketing to not have fallen for that one. Right?

[ghduck]

I want one of these tapes so bad dude.

[mannytoodope]

Lionel Brockman Richie Jr. (born June 20, 1949) is a singer, songwriter, actor, and producer. His career began as a member of The Commodores; the band had numerous hit singles. Richie wrote most of the hit singles, which allowed him to start a successful career in 1982. In 1985, he was one of the writers of the charity hit single “ We Are the World.” Richie has sold over 90 million records worldwide, making him one of the world’s best-selling artists of all time. He has won five Grammy Awards throughout his career. In 2016, Richie received the Songwriters Hall of Fame’s highest honor, the Johnny Mercer Award. He received the 2017 Kennedy Center Honor Award. Richie has continued to have a great career collaborating with others and even dabbling in other genres of music. I like the stuff he did with Commodores, and I like his ‘80/pop-soul stuff that’s where I “cut my teeth” on his music it’s He is currently a judge on the singing competition show American Idol, where his experience and advice introduced to a new audience of fans. Richie has written and performed pop songs that fans will always love. He is respected by his peers, fans, and many artists today.

[appealingtonobody]

[reasoningdaily]

Commodores Talk Recording First New Music Since 1993

The Commodores certainly have no shortage of hits to play any time the stalwart R&B troupe hits a stage -- "Brick House," "Sail On," "Three Times a Lady" and more. But as the group celebrates its…

The Commodores Courtesy of The Commodores

The Commodores certainly have no shortage of hits to play any time the stalwart R&B troupe hits the stage — “Brick House,” “Sail On,” “Three Times a Lady” and many more. But as the group celebrates its 50th (actually 52st) anniversary this year, what co-founder William “Wak” King wants most is to make some new music.

“It’s been a minute,” King, the sole founding member left in the lineup, tells Billboard by phone from his home recording studio in Atlanta, where he is in fact working on fresh tracks for the Commodores. “It’s very exciting right now. Everybody’s kinda pumped. It’s taken awhile to get everybody in the frame of mind to get back in the studio, but we’ve been cutting four tracks and we want to get them completed and figure out what to do with them.”

King blames the long gap between Commodores’ releases — its last album, No Tricks, came out during 1993 — on the success the group has on the road. “We’ve been working a bunch lately within the last number of years,” he explains. “And when everyone comes back home again they’re tired and they just want to rest and not see each other for a while. And just when you’re getting a little comfortable you get a phone call that we need to push the tour dates up a bit and get back on the road. We’ve had to make time to get in the studio.” King has a wish list of producers he’d like to work with, including Usher, and he’s open to the idea of letting them guide what the new material will sound like.

“It’s a different process to go through because normally we all write on our own or some or all of us get together in a room and we just fight it out, literally,” King says. “But one of the things we’ve been bumping our head up against is radio has a certain sound they want to hear. Since we’re not from the millennial era we’re going to write the songs and then bring someone in from today and let them take a listen to see if they can make it more like the sound of the times of today. That’s the plan. Our only concern in (the studio) is making the songs the best they can be, period.”

While he’s planning the future, King and Commodores veterans Walter “Clyde” Orange (since 1972) and James Dean “J.D.” Nicholas (since 1984) stay on the road celebrating the group’s august past. (Original lead guitarist Thomas McClary leads a Commodores Experience band as well, while Lionel Richie remains a solo act.) Founded at Tuskegee University, the group signed with Motown during 1972 and opened for the Jackson 5, and along the way scored four platinum albums, a Grammy Award and 10 top 10 hits on the Billboard Hot 100 along with a Vocal Group Hall of Fame induction. Tuskegee, whose Commodore Museum housed the group’s former rehearsal and recording studio, held a Commodores Day back in March, when the trio also received the keys to the city of Montgomery, Ala.

King does acknowledge that plans were not realized for “a grand concert” celebrating the 50th anniversary but adds that “we’ll look at 55, and this time we won’t screw it up.” He certainly wouldn’t mind a reunion with former members — an offer for a tour came as recently as this past January — but King isn’t counting on that happening, either.

“You’d think maybe it could happen, but it’s never happened to this day,” King notes. “We’ve had people come to us, but all of us would have to do it. Richie hasn’t shown any interest. And Milan (Williams) has passed on — that in and of itself took the steam out of me for a reunion tour, ’cause it means all six of us won’t be there. But having said that, would I do it? Yes. But until we can get everybody, me and Clyde and J.D. will be stay out there keeping the music and the legacy alive.”

The Commodores certainly have no shortage of hits to play any time the stalwart R&B troupe hits the stage — “Brick House,” “Sail On,” “Three Times a Lady” and many more. But as the group celebrates it

[chasedbybuildings]

IIRC, in the mid-80s my brother had one of these that was bundled with his C-16 Plus/4, except that it was black/grey. We used it to tape-record our RPG sessions until I got a ghettoblaster with a better mic. You can just about see it in the bottom right-hand corner of this photo from 1986:

Commodore 1530 Datasette

[commodorez]

I still believe the craziest form of computer program storage format from the 1980s is the cassette tape. Logical I get it but to store entire programs on little tape (that I only remember using to play music) is just crazy to me. Idk

Agreed, cassette tape for data storage was really clever. The concept had its heyday was the 1970s in a wide variety of encoding schemes for different computer platforms. It did persist into the 80s, mostly in Europe, while the US switched to floppy disks as soon as they were available for systems. The majority of my Ohio Scientific software is on cassette.

Talking with UK vs. US Commodore 64 users in particular will highlight the disparity in which storage mediums that were commonplace. I've got a few pieces of software on tape for mainly the VIC-20, but I rarely bother to use it, because it's slow and annoying. To be fair, Commodore's implementation of data storage on tape is pretty rock solid relative to the competition. It's considered more reliable than other company's but Chuck Peddle's implementation of the cassette routines are considered quite enigmatic to this day. He didn't document it super well, so CBM kept reusing his old code from the PET all the way through the end of the C128's development 7 years later because they didn't want to break any backward compatibility.

The big thing that really made alot of homebrewers and kit computer owners cozy up to the idea was the introduction of the Kansas City Standard from 1976. The idea of getting away from delicate and slow paper tape, and moving towards an inexpensive, portable, and more durable storage medium was quite enticing. Floppy disk drives and interfaces were expensive at the time, so something more accessible like off the shelf audio tapes made sense.

I've linked two places you can read about it from Byte Magazine's February 1976 issue below (check the attribution links).

You might recognize a familiar name present...

There are a few ways to encode binary data on tape designed to handle analog audio, but the KCS approach is to have 1's be 8 cycles of 2400Hz tone, and 0's be 4 cycles of 1200Hz tone. I say cycles, because while 300 baud is the initial specification, there is also a 1200 baud specification available, so the duration of marks vs spaces (another way of saying 1's and 0's), is variable based on that baud rate. Many S-100 computers implemented it, as do a few contemporary proprietary designs.

The big 3 microcomputers of 1977 that revolutionized the industry (Apple II, Commodore PET 2001, and Tandy TRS-80 Model I) each have their own cassette interface implementation. It kept costs down, and it was easy to implement, all things considered. The Apple II and TRS-80 use off-the-shelf cassette deck connections like many other machines, whereas the original variant of the PET had an integrated cassette. Commodore later used external cassette decks with a proprietary connector, whereas many other companies abandoned tape before too long. Hell, even the original IBM PC has a cassette port, not that anybody bothered to use that. Each one used a different encoding format to store their data, rather than KCS.

Here's a sample of what an OSI-formatted tape sounds like.

And here's a Commodore formatted tape, specifically one with VIC-20 programs on it.

I won't subject you to the whole program, or we'd be here all day. The initial single tone that starts the segment is called the "leader", I've truncated it for the sake of your ears, as well as recorded them kinda quietly. I don't have any other tape formats on hand to demonstrate, but I think you get the idea.

You can do alot better than storing programs on tape, but you can also do alot worse -- it beats having to type in a program every time from scratch.

[yellowmanula]

I have something special here for fans of the retro vibe, Commodore Amiga computers, turntables, demoscene, and Acid Techno music. It's a collector's postcard that you can play on any turntable. It features an Acid Techno track recorded in 1995 on the Amiga computer (ProTracker) by one of the demoscene groups. The item is collector's edition, part of a limited series. On the cover, you'll find me posing with the Amiga 600 computer.

[thepermanentrainpress]

Gallery: Alluvial @ Commodore Ballroom - Vancouver, BC Date: October 27, 2023 Photographed by: Danielle Costelo

[lemoncrushh]

Easy Like Sunday Morning

Summary: It's your last day with Harry before he leaves.

Warnings: Light mentions of sex. A little angst because you're sad.

Word Count: 1523

A/N: A short little fluffy one shot written in 2017, inspired by the Commodores song Easy. This was originally in first person, but since there was no OC named, I have edited it to be a reader fic. There's no precise reason given why Harry is leaving (tour? movie? recording?), so you can make that up yourself.

The sun hadn't risen yet. The bedroom was still dark except for a tiny bit of moonlight that shone through the tree branches outside your window, casting an eerie shadow on the opposite wall. You watched as the shadow moved back and forth, silently telling you a story. A story that although you knew was a true one, you liked to pretend was fiction.

He was leaving tomorrow.

One more day. That was all you had left with him until...well you didn't know for sure. And you didn't think you wanted to.

You listened to his breathing behind you as you continued to stare at the wall, part of you wishing he would wake up so that you may selfishly have more time with him. A tear trickled from the corner of your eye just as he seemed to somehow hear your silent request and wrapped his arm around your middle to pull you closer. You sighed and wiped the tear, allowing your body to fit into his like a spoon. He groaned low and kissed you just behind your ear. Seconds later you could hear his breaths even out and you knew he was asleep once again. You wondered if he had even awoken at all, or if his gesture was purely automatic.

It didn't matter though. You were his, and he was yours, if only for a little while.

He'd told you he loved you that night. It had been in a moment of passion, and as one tends to speculate the truth behind such confessions, you certainly had. Not to mention he was who he was and could have anybody he wanted. Why would he choose to fall in love with you?

As you pondered this question and more, you felt him move again, rustling the sheets until finally settling his leg between yours. You couldn't help but smile as his lips found your shoulder, and he left a trail of kisses up to your neck.

"Good morning," you whispered, covering his hand that rested on your stomach with your own.

"Morning," he echoed, his voice an octave lower than usual. How you loved his morning voice.

He continued to dot your skin with kisses until you felt his breath tickle your ear.

"Baby?"

"Hmm?" you sounded.

"Even though I'm not fully awake yet, I want you to know..." he paused to swallow. "I meant what I said last night."

You blinked hard before shifting onto your back, releasing yourself from his hold. You looked at his face, and though it was still dark and a shadow cast over most of his features, you could tell his eyelids were heavy, his perfect lips swollen from sleep.

"What was that?" you asked softly, pretending not to know.

His mouth curved up into an easy grin then as he gently touched your face, pushing your hair back with his fingers.

"That I love you," he declared.

You mimicked his smile, raising your own hand to lightly brush your fingers across his chin.

"You do?"

"Yes. It's...it's not just something I say...in the heat of the moment."

You rolled onto your side then, your lips nearly touching.

"I only say it when I mean it," he continued. "When I feel it. I've fallen in love with you and-"

His words were cut short when you crashed your mouth into his, your fingers tangled in the hair on the back of his head.

"I love you, too," you breathed against his lips.

He moaned when you gave him your tongue, allowing you to explore his mouth before he sensually began sucking on it. Your toes curled and you threw your leg over his, needing to feel him against you as much as possible. As you felt his erection between you, you let out a whine.

"I need you again, Harry. Please. Before you leave me."

"Shh, don't say that," he whispered. "I'm not leaving you. I'm coming back."

"Promise?"

"Of course."

He pushed into you before you could protest, making you bite your lip. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders while he lifted your leg to get a better aim. He drove into you deeply, just like the night before. And just like the night before, you held on for dear life. Only this time you weren’t afraid to fall. You’d already fallen, and he'd fallen with you.

When you were lying in each other's arms afterwards, completely spent, you noticed the sunshine streaming through the window. This time the shadow on the wall was not eerie or casting a sad or gloomy story. It looked promising, hopeful.

"What shall we do today, love?" asked Harry, breaking you from your musing.

You beamed at him, loving the melodic sound of his voice.

"I don't know, what'd you have in mind?"

"Well..." he said, propping himself on his elbow. "We have the whole day."

"Yeah."

"I say we do nothing."

You chuckled. "Nothing?"

"Yeah. Just stay here in bed. Maybe put on some music. Have some food. Watch a movie. Make love some more. Maybe even take a nap."

"I'd hardly say that's nothing," you smirked.

"Well, I mean...if you wanna get up and go somewhere..."

Laughing harder, you pulled him to you, planting a kiss on his lips.

"Sounds perfect, actually," you murmured.

By noon, after breakfast in bed (which Harry had insisted on making himself while you rested) and more amazing sex, you found yourself in a moment of complete bliss. The sun shone brightly through your window, but you knew that was not the source of light that made your heart glow from within. It was the man beside you. The man who'd confessed his love to you.

He was leaving tomorrow.

You tried not to think about it. Harry hadn't brought it up again, and you'd decided not to mention it either. You wanted to revel in the joy as much and for as long as you could.

At one point it seemed Harry got a little restless and decided to pick up your guitar from across the room which was certainly fine with you. He sat on the edge of the bed and serenaded you for a while. After finishing a classic 70s tune, he looked at you, an expression you couldn't quite read.

"What?" you finally asked, curious to know what was going on in that gorgeous head of his.

He merely shrugged. "Just love you."

You smiled as he set the guitar down and crawled over to you and kissed you as though he hadn't already been doing that all day.

After lunch you opted for a movie, deciding on Casablanca. You kept your composure at the end, the rational side of you understanding Ingrid Bergman's leaving on the plane, though deep down you knew the romantic side of you thought she was an idiot.

That evening, just after a long nap and the best cup of tea you'd ever had in your life, you finally decided to get up. You stood side by side in the kitchen as he chopped tomatoes and you sautéed the mushrooms to prepare for your dinner. You had the radio on, and you smiled as you listened to Harry singing along.

Girl, I'm leaving you tomorrow...

A tear fell from your eye before you could catch it. Your shoulders shook and you felt your throat close, and you tried desperately not to let your emotions show. But Harry noticed. Dropping the knife, he came up behind you and put his arms around your waist.

"I love you," he reassured you in a whisper. "I love you so much."

You trembled against him, trying to wipe the tears before they fell.

"It's gonna be okay," he added.

"Is it? Is it really? This already hurts so bad and you're not even gone yet."

"Hey. Look at me," he urged.

Abandoning the mushrooms, you turned around, your eyes glistening. He took your face in his hands, wiping away the tears with his thumbs.

"I know this isn't gonna be easy," he said. "But it doesn't have to be that difficult either. We already know we love each other, yeah?"

You nodded.

"Then we're already doing great. I promised I'll come back, and I meant it. You trust me, don't you?"

"Always," you replied.

"We'll just have to deal with the long distance thing a little while. But we'll talk all the time. It'll be okay. Okay?"

You nodded once more, wondering how on earth you'd gotten so lucky to have this man fall in love with you. He kissed you tenderly on the lips before placing another soft kiss on your forehead.

"Don't burn the mushrooms," he teased and you poked him in the side.

That's why I'm easy, easy like Sunday morning...

"This song is misleading anyway," Harry commented.

"How's that?" you asked as you stirred.

"It sounds like a love song. But he's singing about wanting to be free." Harry looked at you. "That's not me."

You raised a brow. "You don't wanna be free?"

"Not when I can be in love," he answered. "It's way better."

If you enjoyed, please like, comment, reblog or send me a msg!

MASTERLIST | KO-FI | FEEDBACK

[bluegalaxygirl]

Amnesia (KidKiller X Reader) P3

Plot: After an explosion reader wakes up in a hospital with no memory of the past few years, her parents want to take her home so she can recover and get back to a normal life while the Kid pirates want her back on the ship where she belongs.

Warning: Bad language, Violence, Blood, Drugs, mentions of torture and Death.

Reader is Female, Poly Relationship, established relationship, Kid X Reader X Killer, Reader is a member of the Kid pirates and is in charge of the money, Budgeting and negotiating the best price.

< Previous part ….. Next Part >

The afternoon sun burned bright in the sky, the white soft clouds slowly floating through the clear sky as birds happy let the light wind take them across the sea. It would have been so peaceful if it weren't for the cannon fire, yelling and metal banging against brick, The Victoria Punk quickly docked at the side of the prison letting the crew off to rampage and free their crew mates while others stayed behind to fire at the prison walls with the cannons. Kid had already left the ship before it even docked and Killer wasn't too far behind, the captain busted open the gates sending shock waves though the floating prison startling everyone inside. Marines run to protect the prison but are either shot, cut or punched hardly standing a chance against the Kid pirates, Kid had no idea where he was going, he just hit and gathered mental as he runs through the base, Killer following behind slicing up anyone who came after them. Wire and Heat know that Kid and Killer would be doing their own thing so the two split up taking a few crew members with them to search the cell area for their crew, it wasn't long until Wire came across the missing crew members. Boogie waves his hand threw the bars seeing his tall crew mate and a few others running down the hall "Wire" The four call out with happy smile's glad to be getting out of this place, the tall man simply nods before using his trident to slice open the bars to each cell letting them out.

The crew around him cheer as they reunite with each other but Wire raises an eyebrow at only seeing the four of them, before he can ask though Bubblegum runs up to him in slight panic "They took Y/n to the infirmary but The Commodore recognized her, he said her father would he furious and to keep her off the records." He quickly explains knowing Wire didn't have the time for long stories, the other three nod confirming what Bubblegum just said. "Get them out of here, I'll check the infirmary , if you see Heat on the way make sure to inform him of all this" The tall man commands the crew he brought with him before heading off to find the medical ward alone, Its true the crew don't know anything about your past, but they never thought to ask and you never brought it up. You had a few strange quirks but then again so did the rest of the crew who come from all over the South blue and some even from the Grand line. Walking into the infirmary Wire looks around seeing several patients in their beds, some tied down while the others seem to be passed out but none of them were you. A whimper catches his attention turning to look at the desk's down the other end of the room, walking over the tall man steps around the main desk to see a young woman wearing a nurses outfit cowering under it, she freezes with a squeak when seeing Wire staring down at her. "Where's Y/N, she was brought in last night or this morning" He asks not making a move towards her yet, he had no reason to hurt her unless she refused to answer his question.

Despite her seeming to know that he had no intention to harm her if she answered, she gave him a response the tall man didn't like "w-we've had no n-new patients" She stutters while trying to move further back in fear but her back is already pressed firmly against the wood, Wire lets out a sigh before bending down to look right at her "My crew said she was brought here so don't lie, where is she?" He asks again becoming impatient his eyes burning into her's making the young girl gulp in fear "I-i'm not lying, I-I can show y-you the records" She pants hoping not to get killed by the tall man. Wire thinks for a second while looking her over, something told him she was telling the truth, but he needed to be sure so using one hand he shoves the heavy wooden desk away causing her to let out a scream, but she makes no move to get up and run, it seems her body chose freeze this time. "Hurry up, i don't have time" Wire gestures towards the file cabinets while gripping his trident in his other hand ready to kill her if she tried to run, with a nod the young woman stands to her shaky feet and makes her way over to the file cabinets taking out the patient records for the past couple of days. Her hands are shaky at best but manages to take them out without dropping them and places them on the other wooden desk thats still standing, Wire steps closer causing the woman to back up to the wall as to not be in his way. Looking over the files it seems she was telling the truth, there isn't any records of any new additions but there were records of the four crew members being patched up then shoved in a cell. So its true that they didn't put you on record but there has to be a trace of you somewhere at least someone who saw you here, the nurse would have told him if she saw you, she's too scared not too.

The young nurse watches the pirate's every move until he shoves the files off the desk and turn to her, thinking she's going to die the young woman closes her eyes and bases for a painful death but instead she hears footsteps walking away. Peeking open her eyes she watches Wire walk towards the door after stepping over the wooden desk that he shoved to the floor and heads down the hall to inform his captain about all this, surprisingly leaving the nurse alive. Killer slices through yet another Marine that thought he could take the masked man on in a sword fight as he follows Kid's mess of destruction, he know's that if he lost sight of his captain all he had to do was follow the trail of bodies and broken walls to find him again. A few marines tried to take on Kid but their weapons where ripped out of their hands as the red head uses his devil fruit to pull them, along with other piece of metal over to him covering his already metal arm making it much bigger and stronger. With a laugh Kid swings the giant arm hitting the marines and the walls around him as Killer finally catches up and stops next to his captain looking around at the mess. Just as they were about to keep going footsteps run up behind them causing the two to turn ready for a fight only to see Wire run around the corner and over to the two. "You find everyone?" Killer asks as the tall man stops in front of them, his breathing is heavy from running, but he also seemed very annoyed or even angry.

Wire nods at the masked man before trying to inform the two of what he's just learned "The others are heading back to the ship, Y/n was taken to the infirmary when she got here but-" Before he can continue Kid groans and walks past his tall friend while rolling his eyes "Well what the hell you waiting for?" The captain yells staring to head to the infirmary but is stopped by Killer "Kid wait.. what were you going to say?" The masked man asks knowing something is wrong since Wire would have looked in the infirmary so why was he here without you. "She's not there, there's no record of her ever being here, th-" Wire's interrupted again this time by both Kid and Killer who yell loud enough he swears that everyone back on the Victoria can hear them "What?" Wire takes a breath mainly to clam his own anger and frustration of being interrupted again before turning to the captain. With his arms crosses over his chest Wire finally managed to explain what the others told him while not being interrupted by the two, he also explained how the young nurse had no idea who you were and that the files showed the four others but not you. The only person who might know where you are is the Commodore, but he hasn't been seen anywhere, Kid growls as he grits his teeth not understanding how things can go this wrong. Killer sighs trying to calm himself before thinking how to go about things but it isn't really working "We should find him, if he won't tell us then we'll just have to beat it out of him" The first mate states getting Kid to snap out of his hate filled gaze on his clenched metal hand.

Kid gives a big grin and a quick nod showing a clear liking towards the idea before heading off to find the Commodore's office with Killer and Wire following behind, the Commodore may not be in his office with all the fighting, but they've met marines of higher ranks that would rather cower away and let their lower ranked officers do the work than fight. The three sprint down the hall gradually feeling the aura change as they get closer to a much stronger person, soon enough a white coated marine appears coming out of his office while holding a small yellow bottle. Kid growls, anger boiling through him as he jumps up bringing his fist down on the Commodore who only managed to dodge at the last second, his cheek getting cut by the splintered wood that fly's through the air due to the force of Kid's metal arm hitting the wooden floor. Using the distraction Killer runs in swinging his blades at the white coated man who gasp as it slices his hand off, Wire runs in next bringing his trident down on the man aiming for his shoulder since they need him alive. Despite the situation the Commodore smirks popping the yellow bottle and quickly tipping it into his mouth before Wire can hit him, a burst of energy sends the three flying back, yellow lightning like power causes out of the man who screams in agony. Killer manages to get to his feet quickly stopping himself from sliding too far away as Wire tumbles a little more but uses his hand to push himself up stopping his body from continuing to roll. Kid shield's his face with his metal arm as his feet skid across the floor managing to stop himself before passing Killer.

The blinding yellow lightning and screams soon stops revealing the Commodore who pants while looking very different, the hand that was cut off has healed into a stump already and the mans already large frame was even bigger, his muscles bulging and almost pulsing as thick raised veins run across his whole body, even his face, the clothes he's wearing is ripped to shreds except or a bit around his groin area and the white coat hanging off his back by a string wrapped around his neck. "What the fuck?" Kid asks standing to his full height as the now large man throws his head back in laughter before looking at the three "I know your rash but i thought you'd at least ask me a question first" The Commodore smirks bringing a leg behind him to get into a fighting stance, Kid takes a step forwards with a smirk of his own knowing it's going to be a good fight but doesn't jump in just yet since Killer lightly placing his hand on the captains arm "Where's Y/n?" The masked man calls out even though he knows he's not going to get a straight answer from this man. "I don't know who your talking about" It was a obvious lie since the man clearly rolled his eyes that smirk never fading from his face. Kid rushes in gathering metal around him to make his metal arm large again before punching the marine who uses both of his arms to stop the punch, the captain didn't bother to ask questions instead focusing on the fight. Pulling his hand back the captain continues to punch and grapple with the large marine while Killer and Wire wait on the side lines knowing not to jump in just yet. "Sneak into the office, see what you can find" The masked man glances at the tall man who nods heading of to sneak into the Commodore's office.

Once Wire's out of view Killer joins the fight running over with his blade's spinning and going for the Marines legs, sliding past the masked man turns back only to see the commodore's leg's unharmed even though his blade differently cut though skin since there's blood on his blade. "Answer the fucking question" Kid yells as he blocks the Commodore's punch with his metal arm, some of the metal denting under the force making the captain grunt in annoyance, Killer runs back into the fight, jumping into the air and bringing his blades down on the marines back letting them dig in. The Commodore yells in pain and anger as his wounds try to heal even though there are blades stuck in his back. "Where is she" The masked man yells as the marine tries to reach back and grab him only to be punched in the face by Kid's large arm, thinking quickly the commodore runs backwards hoping to crush the blonde between him and the wall only for Killer to quickly catch on and brings his blades out, jumps off the marines back just before being crushes. Panting slightly the white coated marine swipes as Killer lands about to hit him when a chunk of metal hits his chest forcing the large back back into the brick wall making it crack under the pressure. Metal continues to swarm over pinning the man to the wall while Kid Chuckles walking up to his partners side "Tell us where she is and I'll make your death quick" Kid smirks looking at the struggling and panting marine who seems to have given up,the Commodore slowly looks up at the two letting a sick joyful smile from on his face. "i'm sorry to inform you but she's dead, her wounds were just too much for her" The captain extends his arm purple strings of light flowing from his hand as his eyes burn with anger.

Kid starts closing his fist making the metal around the commodore compress the pain of even thinking your dead makes it hard for him not to kill this guy "Liar" The captain yells but the marine shakes his head while struggling to get free "She's dead deal with it" The commodore yells managing to get one of his arms free, Killer's quick to act running over and stabbing his arm forcing the blades through and into the wall, the marine yells in pain trying to pull his arm away but their combined strength was too much even with what ever drugs he took. "We know she's alive, tell us where she is" The masked man growls using all his strength to keep the commodore's arm in place while Kid continues to try and squeeze the life out of him, before the commodore can answer Wire runs out of the office with an angry look "She's not here" their crew mate yells out causing the two to look over at him in surprise and confusion "There's no record of her but a ship left last night with a bunch of medial supply's and an extra passenger. It didn't say where it was heading though" The tall man explains before turning to the Commodore "But you were the one to order it" Kid growls while squeezing tighter making the marine caught up blood, Killer removes his blades from the mans arms watching as the wound starts to close shut leaving no scar behind. "Where are they taking her?" Kid yells out stepping closer to the large man who's still struggling, but he can tell the marine is getting weaker, the drugs must be wearing off with all the healing its having to do, when the Commodore refused to answer Kid grips harder causing the man to scream out in pain, his ribs cracking and organs being crushed "We can still follow her Vivre card but I'd like to keep him alive, so we can get information" Killer sighs looking to his partner.

The captain thinks for a second before nodding and loosens his grip, the sound of bones cracking back into place echos threw the hall along with a slight yellow glow coming out from under the metal arm holding him in place. "Shit not now" The commodore groans feeling his strength fade away, the yellow light causing through his veins making his large body start to shrink and muscles deflate. With a laugh Kid lets the marine go watching him fall to the floor, his skin turning gray and his lest over clothes hang loosely around his now skinny body, much skinnier than when he was normal. "Looks like you took those drugs for nothing, they couldn't even help you take us down and made you even weaker. Pathetic" The captain smirks before bringing his foot down on the crouched man forcing him to lay on his stomach with little effort. "Well at least it'll be a lot easier to get him to the ship" Wire states walking over to the two and looking down at the weak looking Commodore who's struggling to try and lift his own head up, its clear what ever drug he took has bad side effects but they have no time to think about that now so Killer grabs a nearby cable and hog ties the marine as the captain steps aside starting to head back the way they came. Wire follows close behind as Killer throws the commodore over his shoulder carrying him back to the ship.

----- The Victoria Punk-----

Things had stetted down now that the Victoria is far away from the destroyed and burning prison but what they hoped would a simple job as now turned into a longer and more complicated one. Wire went back to steering the ship using your Vivre card to show him which direction to go in while Heat and Reck where keeping an eye on the Commodore who's currently chained up in a dark room bellow deck. Kid and Killer make their way into the med bay seeing House just finishing up taking care of the crew mate's wounds, there wasn't much to do since the medical staff at the prison did a, ok job but the doctor could tell it was more of a rush job. "Boss" Boogie yells with a smile happy to see his captain again, the other three crew mates turn and smile too slightly cheering for their captain and first mate, Kid grins for a second before becoming serious "Tell me what happened" The captain states walking into the room as Killer closes the door behind them, The four start talking all at once causing the masked man to sigh "One at a time" Killer states as the four look at each other before nodding silently agreeing that Bubblegum and Boogie should be the ones to say what happened. It took a while of explaining since Killer kept asking for more details and what exactly the marines said about you word for word. "So you didn't get anything on her farther?" Killer asks as he leans against the wall with his arms crossed, Bubblegum shakes his head but Emma sits up from the bed she's laying on "we'll we had a talk about it all in the cell, and we all agree that he's not a marine since the Lieutenant mentioned that her farther has no power to fire them."

The other three nod but Kid turns to House who's washing her equipment her back facing them "House… You know anything? She must have told you something" The captain asks making the crazy haired girl jump a little at her name being call, you and her are best friends so it's only right to assume she'll know something about your family but unfortunately she didn't know much. Turning to face her captain and his first mate she wipes her hands clean while looking down at the floor "Only that she ran way because they did something unforgivable and that she renounced her last name" She states but Killer and Kid look at her surprised, they knew you ran away because of your parents but your last name was fake? "What?" The two ask causing the girl to jump again as Killer pushes off the wall to walk over to her, he wasn't trying to be intimidating but House shrunk away, backing up into the counter with wide eyes "I-i thought she would have told you" House tries to defend herself making the masked man realizes his actions, with a sigh Killer places a light hand on her shoulder to reassure her "Just tell us everything she told you, even if you think we know" Relaxing a little House nods as Kid walks over to the two crossing his arms over his chest and waiting for the doctor to talk "She never told me what her real last name was because if she told me then… I'd know too much. She was drunk at the time so i though maybe she was just being paranoid or drunkenly rambling. She said a lot of other random stuff that still don't make sense really" She sighs but the two stay quiet wanting her to go on.

House gathers her courage while trying to remember what you said years ago while drunk out of your mind, you confided in her and told her not to tell a soul, House promised she wouldn't but now she had to break that promise and spill your random and incoherent rambling to your partners. "She said her parents were disappointed she wasn't a boy, that she used to tutor kids even though she didn't go to school. She won a bunch of contests that she's not proud off, She has sibling that she lived with but didn't know anything about them and that leaving was the best destitution she ever made." Kid sighs pinching his nose, it didn't give them much to go on other than your family is most likely stuck up and important in some way, Killer removes his hand from House's shoulder and gives her a nod, it did sound like drunken rambling but it did give him a few hints and maybe something to use in order to make the Commodore slip up while questioning him. "Thanks guy's, get some sleep before dinner, Papa's is cooking tonight since I've got another job to do" Killer states earning groans from around the room that he tries to hold a laugh back at "Papa's is the best out of a bad bunch, so they'll have to put up with it until Killer's free enough to cook again." Kid snaps even though he knows how bad the man's food is, Killer grips onto the captain's while gesturing to the door earning a gruff hum from the red head. Walking out the two hear the yelling of their crew behind them calling out their goodbyes and thanking them before the door is shut "What are you thinking?" Killer asks as the two walk side by side down the hall heading to the dark room where the marine is. "Just… Rich pricks" Kid huffs getting the masked man to let out a low chuckle in agreement.

[vibratingskull]

Hello, hello. I am obsessed with your stories .

I would like to ask you to write a Thrawn x f!reader . Thrawn is in love with the reader, and she refuses him. but she is actually very much in love with him. She believes she would never come first for him and that even she will be expendable to him should it come to that. Which is why she refused him.

Thank you my dear ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ I am sorry for the delay

Thrawn x F!reader

tags : misunderstanding, heart to heart, love confession, (kinda?)hurt/comfort

Your heart is pounding. 

Peacefully seated at his desk, Grand Admiral Thrawn analyzes your latest work. You worked your ass off on these data, crossing all of those dates, GPS coordinates, vids information, and alien propaganda speeches to FINALLY locate the hideouts of those rebels! But you fucking did it! 

You’re not the Chimaera’s Commander for nothing! 

You were so much lower on your latest ship, underestimated and underappreciated. You made one singular mistake in the entirety of your career! And it earned you a transfer to the Chimaera, under then Vice Admiral Thrawn’s command, where a lot of the outcasts of the Navy ended up. A sign of shame and failure, being put under the only Alien of the Navy was worse than being demoted or laid off for some. 

But very quickly 

The tendance shifted. 

Thrawn has a natural talent : to find and refine others’ strengths, like a jeweler carefully polishes a precious gemstone. People who were judged useless under others’ orders suddenly started to flourish and gave good results, incredibly good results even ! Their enthusiasm and motivation crushed at their former posts reappeared, stronger than ever ! 

Thrawn took the losers he was given, nurtured their strong suits, and turned them into one of the most efficient crews the Empire ever had ! 

Commodore Faro and you were prime examples of Thrawn’s strong management talent and leadership. Diminished on other ships, unstoppable on the Chimaera ! 

And when Thrawn reached the rank of Grand Admiral in the record time of a single decade, all the snake tongues were forced to recognize his undeniable success and tactical genius. As they always should have! 

All those factors now make the Chimaera the most requested ship by ensigns and Navy workers of any field. From soldier to machinist, data scientist to engineer, to officer, all come knocking at Thrawn’s door to be part of the crew that will make History with a big H ! 

And you are one of them. Welcomed and guided by the Man himself you are part of his core team, his strongest supporter and follower. You are part of the Chimaera’s crew as you are part of a family, under Thrawn’s wise guidance. 

And… 

If you are honest with yourself and look at the bottom of your soul, the worryingly strong and fast beating of your heart might not just be because of the stress of having your work reviewed by a superior. 

But because of something else entirely... 

Something taboo, that should not exist between a Grand Admiral and his Commander of any respectable fleet. 

But you just cannot calm down your heart when you cross gaze with his shining rubies, you cannot help your blood rushing to your cheeks, the slight wobbliness of your legs, the air getting stuck in your throat when you have to speak to him. 

‘’Very good, Commander (Y/n). A remarkable job of investigation in a record time !’’ Thrawn finally declares, looking at you with a satisfied little grin, ‘’You can be proud of yourself.’’ 

‘’Thank you Grand Admiral.’’ You slightly bow your head to him with respect, ‘’Some data scientists did a wonderful job gathering all of that information, I would not have done it without their efforts.’’ 

‘’You will need to give me their name, so I can keep a closer tab on them.’’ He slowly nods in approval. 

‘’I will make you a list, Sir.’’ 

‘’Did anyone else caught your eyes ?’’ 

‘’Sir ?’’ You demand, ‘’Is it not Commodore Faro’s prerogative ?’’ 

‘’It is. It is also the prerogative of any of my officers I estimate. I value your opinion and judgment more than some of my fellow Grand Admirals, if you notice someone’s good work getting unappreciated I want you to come to me.’’ 

‘’Sir, I think you have no trouble noticing it yourself.’’ You cannot help but chuckle. 

He keeps looking at you, a tight satisfied grin on his lips, soft and found. His eyes seem to shine brighter. 

‘’What?’’ You ask before his insisting gaze, still shaken by your laugh. 

‘’Nothing. I simply enjoy hearing your laugh. It is such a delectable sound, it alleviates my stress and appeases my mind.’’ He tilts his head, focused on you. 

Your smile falters and the laugh dies down immediately. You close back on yourself, pressing your datapad against your chest. 

You cannot permit yourself such things... 

‘’With your permission, sir, I will take my leave.’’ You say, recovering your detached and professional tone, cutting short the conversation. 

His shoulders ever so lightly lower down and his smile disappears, like he is... Disappointed. But his expression remains unshakable. 

‘’Of course, Commander. You may go, I wish you a peaceful and restful sleep.’’ 

You curtly nod, murmur a ‘you too, Sir’ so low you wonder he even heard it, and exit the large office rapidly. You walk swiftly in the long and bright corridors of the Chimaera, a maze you know by heart. 

A maze you now call home. 

Your datapad pressed against your breast as to hide your sprinting heart from anyone who might cross your path you walk straight and fast, head raised high but gaze low on the floor. You gulp with difficulty trying to order your boiling mind. 

Grand Admiral Thrawn is nothing but professional, courteous, and polite. He never makes any crass comments of any kind or insinuations, the only compliments leaving his lips are praises for a work well done or a cunning attitude. 

That is all! 

Except for you. 

It has been several months now since he started to casually compliment you on... Anything really. He always found a little something to compliment you over every day. 

Always respectful and within the bounds of morality. 

He started as with anyone else, a ‘Good work’ here, a ‘Pertinent observation’ there, a ‘successful mission.’ sprinkled in. 

And one day it was ‘This new hair style compliment your features wonderfully.’ Out of the blue and with no warning. He said it casually, with his usual nonchalance and detachment, and you simply assumed he was in an exceptionally good mood to compliment someone for something so mundane and out of his usual zone of comfort. 

But this is highly unusual behavior for him!  

You never heard him compliment anyone’s hairstyle, choice of blush, or capacity to keep their uniform clean. But he started doing it for you. A little one every day, a constant stream of praise day by day... 

And if you brushed it off the first time, the second was heavily suspicious. 

He may slip off one time. But never two. 

It was intentional on his part! It must have been. 

He also started to take more caff breaks when you took one. He always appears three to five minutes after you, takes a fuming cup of caff, engages in some conversation with you, and gets back to the bridge a maximum of two minutes before you, down to the second.  

Sometimes he does not even take a single sip of his drink, preferring to speak with you about the current campaign, but mostly art, his special interest. If you wished to speak about your interests, he becomes absolutely mute. 

But he listens to you rambling attentively because when you come back to the subject a week or so later, he recalls a myriad of details of different importance with excruciating precision about anything you spoke of. 

If you are already talking to someone else, he does not insert himself in the conversation unless invited, preferring to take a seat at a table to sip his drink in complete silence. 

His gaze fixes his cup or the propaganda posters on the walls but always seems to come back to you, like you were a light in the darkness... You can feel his burning eyes on the back of your neck. But it does not feel like a burnt wound. Instead, it simply feels like... A heat source on your neck, a warm point that gently spreads on your skin... And when you spin your head in his direction to spot him, his eyes are back on his cup. 

But you do feel his warm gaze on you... 

You KNOW it. 

For some reason, he is trying to deepen your relationship. 

And while your heart pumps like a machine at that simple thought, you also know you should stifle that hope in its infancy. 

Thrawn... Is a man married to his job. War is the very purpose of his existence and he excels at it, why would he weigh himself down with a relationship? 

He either wants a short casual fling, which you would never guess was his style, or he wants something deeper... A real relationship with you. 

And those possibilities terrify you. 

When you love, you love generously, pouring your very own blood into the relationship, giving endlessly to please your partner. And it cost you a lot in the past, you were used and cast aside after countless times. So many tears were wasted for partners who only saw you as a commodity. You promised yourself to never fall for someone who does not make you their priority anymore! 

But you fell for Grand Admiral Thrawn, despite your better judgment and best efforts. 

He is a man of integrity, intelligence, charisma, and elegance, you did not feel any malice or will to hurt others in him which is surprisingly uncommon in the Navy hierarchy of the Empire.  

And he is very far from being displeasing to look at! His alien features even reinforce his natural charm, his face is harmonious and delicate with sharp intelligent eyes. 

Really, everything seems to make him a wonderful romantic partner in theory. 

But the theory doesn’t account for the first love of his life: work. 

You will never come before his first love, and as a Grand Admiral maybe you should not, but that stabs your heart.  

Once again you fell for the wrong one. 

If only you were smitten, you could manage. But the fact that he seemed to take an interest in you in return, offers you his gentle words and careful attention complicates absolutely everything! 

You should not fall for that trap again! You do not want to! 

But how to refuse such a man? How to look in his carmine gaze and stand your ground? It is demanding a will you simply do not possess, so now you run away from any new attempt from him. You respond coldly and sternly at any non-work related praises and leave the room swiftly. 

He never tries to hold you back, accepting your choice. 

That does not make it any easier for you. If you falter ONCE and give him hope that it is possible, you may fall again and hurt yourself, deeper this time. 

You survived your exes but could you survive Grand Admiral Thrawn’s love?  

Nothing is less certain. 

So you run away like a coward, feeling his fond gaze on your form. 

Never again... 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Thrawn sighs internally, his eyes fixed on the door you just exited through like a persistent image of you would appear to him if he focused on it. 

Again, you fled. 

He is used to it by now. He compliments you on anything not work-related and you shut off completely. 

What did he expect exactly anyway? Love stories between superiors and subalterns in a fleet are such a cliche of movies without any grounds in reality. He heard of some in the Ascendancy and the Empire and none ended well. 

But for some months he had that fleeting hope, that childish wish that something was possible between you two. 

He was the first surprised to realize he had feelings for you. He welcomed you under his commands as every other officer sent to him and you worked together for some time to find your strengths and give you the appropriate post for your skills. 

He was proud to see you grow and mature, witnessing your skills sharpening day by day until you wield them like a deadly blade with the utmost precision. Your true talents were revealed and your name started to be passed around and other ship captains started to court you for a transfer. 

It happens a lot. A lot of officers he trained were transferred to other fleets and he only heard good about them since then, even Commodore Faro was heavily requested by others for her next promotion, and while he would only feel pride and accomplishment to let her go lead her own forces as she deserves to, he only felt a deep and insidious cold course his flesh when your name appeared in the requests.  

At first, he rationalized it. He concluded that it was too soon for you to leave his tutelage yet, he could still teach you more before seeing you fly away. But the more transfer requests he received, the colder he felt, and the more uneasy he was. 

It was like... lacking air. Like he tried to breathe desperately but his throat was so contracted no air could reach his lungs. But those uncomfortable sensations melted in your presence. Next to you, everything felt right and natural once again, like it was meant to be.  

Slowly your grip on his being started to tighten, like a frog boiling in a pot. 

He never felt like that and it was starting to worry him. He could not let a single person have so much power over him, it would be too dangerous for his ultimate goal, but each time you appeared in his field of vision, all his worries vanished and a warm sensation spread in his chest, his heart felt wrapped in silk and everything was good again. 

And then 

The first wet dream came. 

He had some in his early teenage years when hormones did their work as for everyone else. But he always only saw a faceless, nameless figure in his arms at night. And then they just disappeared altogether, promptly sorted and locked in his well-organized mind and no further dream came to disturb his sleep. 

But that morning he was lying in bed, completely dumbfounded. His eyes wide open, fixed on the ceiling he tried to understand what that dream meant. For the very first time, he saw a face. 

Your face. 

So clearly. 

And what a dream it was... 

He observed his trembling hands for a moment, trying to make sense of all of that. Did his control over his flesh and body start to loosen after all this time? 

Was he softening up? 

He greeted his teeth and went on with his day. At that moment, he convinced himself it was lust. 

Just lust. 

Simple in theory but completely new to him, nobody ever disturbed his flesh like that before and it was quite annoying in his opinion. Obviously, it was only his problem, he could not reasonably hold you responsible for the weakness of his mind and body. He must deal with it alone and not let it disturb his focus! 

But he only had to hear your voice... 

Hear the melodic notes of your laugh... 

Admire the light in your human eyes... 

To know that he was in much more trouble than he first thought. 

It was not lust. 

It was love. 

A first for him once again, and at that point he was convinced it would never happen! Not that he would mind, honestly. Heart matters seem more troublesome than anything else... 

But you assuredly walked into his life and as assuredly took his heart from his chest to keep it with you like a lovely thief, you fondly kissing it every day with your perfect lips, making it beat faster, to the point he felt it could implode at any moment. 

That day he complimented you on your new hairstyle. Out of nowhere. He greeted you, let you know how lovely you were, and walked away without any other word.  

Why did he do that? Beats him.  

He saw you and felt the irrepressible desire to compliment you,  but the usual work praises did not feel enough to calm down the raging storm rising in his chest at that moment. 

And it all derailed from here. 

He kept the compliments coming and welcomed your disincarnated embrace in his dreams at night, craving to feel your real arms wrapping around him to hug him. 

He felt the need to follow you when you took your breaks as any minute away from you felt like death. He instigated casual conversations with you, trying to get you to open up to him. But you kept it so clean and professional; Would it be anyone else he would be thankful for that but he wants you to reveal your heart to him. 

He would take anything! Just learning your favorite color would satisfy his cravings for a month. 

You slowly relaxed around him, accepting to speak a bit about yourself, as much as it was morally acceptable for a Commander to say to her Grand Admiral. He noted every minute detail you let escape in his mind with meticulousness, creating a map of you in his head. 

He let you speak, not daring to interrupt you. He could listen to you describing paint dry. 

Of course, he knew how to stop. If you were talking to a colleague he respected your privacy, if he felt you uncomfortable at any moment he would take his leave. 

And for a time he fantasized about waking next to you in the same bed, rings shining at your fingers. And it was sweet and soft... 

But you are not receptive.  

So he buried that dream and slowly prepared to walk away from you. Each time he compliments you your face hardens and your tone gets colder and aloof. 

But for a split second... 

You bite your lips and he witnesses your heart accelerating in his infrared vision. 

And you cannot take that away from him. No matter how harshly you cut the conversation short. Those little compliments are his little pleasures, his only fancy. The only thing he allows himself to savor in secret. 

His eyes fall again on the datapad in his hand. With a gesture of the finger, he swipes the file to let appear the latest captain’s request to transfer you to their ship. 

Soon he will say goodbye to you, but at least he should make sure you get the best post possible... 

------------------------------------------------------ 

“Oh Maker...” Karyn makes her spine pop with a sigh of relief, “Today was long!” 

“Indeed.” You chuckle, “It was pretty dry and boring!” 

You both head to the bar of the officer mess hall. 

“Two beers!” Karyn orders, “I am done with work for the day! I need to relax.” 

Your shift finished 10 minutes ago, you are officially free for the rest of the day, and a fresh beer seems delectable right now! You sit next to your friend, clink your glasses, and take a large gulp with delight. 

“That’s the stuff!” You gasped. 

“True! I need to get drunk tonight or I will go crazy!” Karyn declares slamming her glass down the bar. 

You look at her with silent questions in your eyes, inviting her to speak more. She snarls, licking her white teeth. 

“I feel like the Grand Admiral is trying to slow me down.”  

“What?” You ask incredulously. 

“He interfered so I could not become Commander of Task Force 231.” She reveals, her head sitting in her hand, annoyed. 

You freeze, contemplating what she just said to you. Would Grand Admiral Thrawn truly do that? Voluntarily sabotaging his own Commodore’s career? 

No. 

You cannot believe that! 

“I am sure he had a reason. He is a fair man, you deserve to lead your own troops, maybe he has a bigger plan for you.” 

She turns her head towards you, gauging you up and down before sneering shortly. 

“I forgot who I was talking to.” 

You nudge her playfully, earning another snigger. 

“You know I am objective. Even about him!” You counter. 

“Mmmmh. Maybe you are, maybe not.” She taunts, taking another sip, “All right! I think it is time for some women talks. How things are going with your Chiss?” 

“He isn’t my Chiss, Karyn.” You remind her, “We are not together.” 

“Which is highly surprising in my opinion with how interested he is.” 

Your grip tightens around your glass, your eyes hypnotized by the ale in front of you. 

“He is not interested.” You try to assert. 

“Arh, do not use that charade with me, (Y/n)! We are both past it, he devours you with his eyes and tried an infinite amount of time to speak with you. He never showed such interest in anyone since I work under him!” 

“He is just trying to be friendly.” You recoil more on your seat. 

“Maker fricking... (Y/n)!” She starts losing patience “We both know that is bullshit. I am tired of seeing your beaten puppy look every day, talk to him!” 

“... And say what? Explain to me what I am supposed to say, ‘Sorry, I am in love with you but you’ll probably relegate me to the bottom of your priority list, so no chance?’” 

“Why do you assume he would relegate you to the bottom of his priority list?” 

You turn to her with a raised eyebrow and a tired smile. 

“Because he is a Grand Admiral and married to his job? Because if I did come before his duties that would put us all in danger and jeopardize his entire career? Because it is simply impossible? Because he will not risk his goal for a single relationship?” 

Usually, you love goal-oriented partners, but you just wish they would make some place for you in their lives and not just see you as an appliance to take advantage of. You want them to be your supporter as you are theirs, but you have been let down so many times... 

“(Y/n)...” 

You sigh. 

“It is so hard, you know? To see him every day, to feel his grip around my heart compressing it until no blood is left. I feel like I am drowning in love and despair, I feel his gaze on my skin and I go weak. He plagues my dreams every night and I wake up cold and arms empty.” 

“(Y/n)?” Karyn whispers, “Maybe you should-” 

“It just hurts so much. To have him so close, to see Thrawn every day, excelling in his career and craving he would give me the same attention... Some nights I cry in my bed because I feel so empty.”  

“Hum, (Y/n)...?” Karyn slightly stiffens. 

“But what can I do?” You put your head in your hands with a long sigh “I promised myself not to fall again and I tripped over my feet when I met him. He is the textbook definition of whom I should avoid at all costs but I fell face first in the permabeton. At that point it’s a pattern, I am searching to get hurt. I am weak... I am pathetic but I love him!” You feel sobs rising in your throat and your eyes start to get wet, “Why is it so hard? Why can’t I forget these sentiments with a snap of fingers? Why do I have to live with this? Why-” 

“(Y/n)!” Karyn shushes you with a hard whisper, gripping your shoulder to shake you. 

You turn your head to her and she designates something on the other side discreetly. You turn your head again and almost fall from your stool. 

Right there, at the other side of the bar, a fuming cup of caff in his hand, Grand Admiral Thrawn sits, perfectly calm and composed. 

But more importantly, at eavesdropping distance. 

You immediately focus back on your ale, head full and spinning. 

He heard you! 

You know he did, he always hears everything in a room! 

You are so done for! You are royally fucked! You are so... 

“Maybe he did not hear, maybe he-” Karyn doesn’t have the time to finish her sentence, you get down your stool and leave the mess hall, ditching them both without a single word. 

You need to disappear! And quickly! 

------------------------------------------------- 

Thrawn lifts his cup to his lips elegantly, peacefully sipping the scorching hot caff. 

But inside he is anything but peaceful. 

“I am sorry, sir.” Karyn Faro finally says, tensing up before her full glass. 

“What for?” Thrawn asks, putting his down delicately, eyes fixed on his cup. 

She purses her lips, clearly embarrassed and uneasy. 

“This was not planned.” She explains. 

“I know.” He simply responds, “You are not one to expose other’s affairs.” He reassures her. 

He contemplates his reflection in the dark beverage, the steam lazily rising towards the ceiling while his stomach drops low. 

Is it how you truly see him? How you perceive his personhood? Is it his true value in your heart? 

He did not intend to listen to you! He just wanted to sit in your vicinity while drinking his caff and then anonymously leave without you noticing he was even there, leaving you two speaking peacefully. He did not intend to pry in your private conversation so impolitely! 

But when he understood you were talking about him he could not help but perk his ear. 

He almost froze hearing you professing your love for him and for a split second his soul sang. 

Only for the high to crash down spectacularly with your next words. 

So this is it, then? Your choice is made and your opinion is decided. This relationship will not be? 

You will not give him even a single chance to prove his worth? 

And he will let you go without trying to correct you? 

And everything will be over without even starting. 

You will now avoid him until he accepts a transfer request and he will never see you ever again, only hearing rumors of you thriving away from him, leaving him alone and cold to face his destiny and fate? 

Without your support? 

Without the music of your voice to help him carry through? 

Without the reflection of light in your gorgeous eyes to appease his worries? 

Without the warmth of your reassuring presence at his side? 

... 

No. 

He slams his cup down and stands on his feet. 

“Sir?” Commodore Faro asks as he walks away, decided. 

He can’t. 

This is beyond him. 

This is the first time he is in love, he simply cannot let you go without at least trying to plead his case! 

This would kill him. 

He knew it was dangerous. Deep down he knew that keeping you at his side was not the tactical-sounding choice. He prophetized before that keeping you around would give you too much power over him, but he would lie if he did not admit that he hoped it would happen deep down his soul. That your grip on his heart was as strangling as it was soothing, that a brush of your hand could command his mood. 

Your power over him was nothing about hierarchy, was not wicked or dangerous like those he experienced before in the Ascendancy and the Empire. It was comforting, soothing, soft but strong. 

The kind of power he would submit to with glee because he knew no harm could ever come of it. Because that power was meant to bring you together... 

He just cannot! 

He walks deadly focused ahead, with long strides in the corridors of the Chimaera. His shift resumes in less than 5 minutes but this is the least of his worries right now! 

For the very first time in his life, work will wait. He has to clear the air with you first! 

It doesn’t take too much time for him to find you. He is quicker than you and he would not let you escape like that! 

You are walking rapidly toward your cabin to lock yourself up most probably. Seeing your back walking away from him like that infuriates him somehow, he is offended! 

“Commander (Y/n) (F/n), stop!” He exclaims with an authoritative voice. 

You shudder, but instead of obeying you pick up the pace. 

You...! 

“Commander! I order you to stop right now!” He orders louder, accelerating behind you. 

You take four more steps before giving up and stop. You remain still, back turned to him, awaiting his next commands. 

He approaches you, already regretting his order. He closes the distance between you and places his hand on your shoulder. 

You shudder at the contact and he retracts it immediately. 

“Commander (F/n)...(Y/n), I am sorry.” He finally announces after several seconds of silence and stillness, “I would like to discuss some of your words earlier.” 

“Stop.” you finally speak. 

Thrawn almost gulp at your tone 

“I beg your pardon?” 

“I said stop.” You repeat, “I do not have to hear that.” 

Thrawn squints. This is the very first time you cut him like that. This is the first time a subordinate ever cut him... 

“I can take an earful if I make a professional mistake. But that... You do not have any right to impose that on me.” You explain. 

“Turn around and face me.” He orders softly. 

Your hands roll into fists but you slowly turn toward him. You take care not to look into his eyes, preferring to focus on his Grand Admiral badge. Your lips are pressed in a thin line, displeasure clearly apparent on your face. 

Thrawn refrains from cupping your cheeks in his hands to hold you lovingly. Instead, he claps them behind his back, preparing himself for the battle ahead. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

“I simply wish to talk.” He reiterates, “This is not an unreasonable demand.” 

Your nostril flares but you add nothing. 

“(Y/n), is what you said true?” He demands sternly. 

So he did hear you, as you feared.  

“Sir, this is highly unprofessional.” 

“I am aware, but I feel like we need to have this discussion.” 

“No, we do not. If you insist I will file a report for sexual harassment.” You bite back, acidic. 

You need to cut that conversation short. You need to escape. 

“With what proofs?” Thrawn tilts his head. 

The tone is not mocking or threatening, it is calm, assured, and simply factual. You both know you have nothing against him, he never tried anything against your consent and always remained within the bounds of morality. 

“We both know you will do none of that, (Y/n). You are too good to make false accusations on such a grave matter.” 

You greet your teeth as you raise your frowning gaze to meet his. 

“Am I?” 

His stern and cold expression relaxes to let appear a tight, fond smile as the glow of his eyes seems to brighten. 

“Of course. Your ethics are too strong to slander an innocent man and tarnish victims’ testimony of such a heinous crime.” 

You snarl, flashing your teeth to him. 

But you have no rebuttal. He is right. You would not do such a thing to victims who already have difficulties to have their voices heard. 

“I simply wish to clear the air and tell you my truth.” He takes another step toward you, “This is all I am asking for.” 

The smile is gone but quiet hope burns in his red eyes. 

You gulp. You told your sentiments to Karyn, but revealing them to his face, admitting them to his eyes... That would kill you on the spot! 

“I wish to hear it from you. Tell me the truth, please.” He insists with a softer tone 

Almost... begging. 

Your lungs tighten in your ribcage, preventing you from breathing correctly while your throat dries up. You open your mouth be no sound escapes you. 

“Take your time.” Thrawn invites, his eyes shining so bright you cannot see any pupils anymore. 

“What for?!” You spit annoyed, “What would ever come of that discussion anyway?! Our expectations do not coincide!” 

Thrawn seems to tense up ever so slightly at your words, like he was hurt. 

But that would mean you have the means to reach and hurt him, and you seriously doubt you do. Either way, he needs to hear it, you cannot just brush past all that like the world is a wonderful peaceful place. You both have jobs and a relationship would just complicate everything! 

“You do no-” Thrawn stops immediately, looking behind you suddenly, “Someone is coming.” 

You turn your head full of hope. Finally, your ticket to exit that predicament! 

But before you can see anyone or anything you feel a large hand grabbing your arm and pulling you. You yelp in surprise when Thrawn pulls you inside a cramped and dark room and the door slams shut behind you. 

You pull yourself together and realize you are inside a closet. A very small closet. So small Thrawn needs to press you against himself for it to hold you both inside. You gasp, your cheek pressed against his large muscular chest, his long arms wrapped around your shoulders. 

“Sir!” You whisper indignantly, “This is-” 

“Silence.” He shushes you, “They are approaching...” 

You huff but remain silent. After some seconds you can hear a group of people discussing and approaching the door. You tense up, praying no one will open it and bust you in Thrawn’s arms... 

“Relax.” He whispers with his rich deep voice, a hand coming to caress your hair to soothe you like you were a cat or something. 

“This was unnecessary, Sir!” You complain with a low voice. 

“You would have preferred we continue this private conversation with them around?” He responds deadpan. 

You growl, putting your hands on his pecs to put some distance between you, but his grip is firm around you and the closet is really confined. You abandon that idea and give up, awaiting for the group to walk away, and then you’ll rush out and sprint away from the Chiss. 

You try to calm down your beating heart, feeling Grand Admiral Thrawn’s high body temperature through his uniform, your cheek getting pleasantly warm at his contact. 

Is that... Is that his heart that you feel beating against your cheek? 

You refrain from sniggering. Of course, this is his heart, but it amuses you to realize that he does have one... He who is always so stern and cold, detached and unbothered does have a heart after all! 

You close your eyes, silently focusing on the steady drum in his chest. If they open the closet door and bust you, you cannot do anything to stop it now, no use in stressing yourself out or causing trouble in the confined space. 

Did Thrawn feel you relaxing in his embrace? A soft and deep rumble starts in his chest and throat, like a...  

“Chiss can purr?” You murmur flabergasted. 

“Indeed.” He reveals, “Pardon me, I have some difficulties keeping it at bay with you in my arms.” 

You add nothing, too shocked by this revelation. 

“It isn’t... unpleasant.” You finally admit, a bit reluctantly. 

The purr deepens at your praise and he lays his chin on the top of your head. For some second you wonder if he is about to kiss your head, but he remains like that, continuing to caress your hair, unbothered. 

“Why don’t you want to tell me the truth?” He finally asks after a minute of silence, listening to the group that seems to have stopped just before your hiding spot. 

“There is nothing to say.” 

“You revealed your sentiment to Commodore Karyn. Why revealing them to me is impossible for you?” 

You sigh longly, eyes lost in the darkness of the broom closet, trying to formulate a coherent sentence with all those sentiments and emotions raging inside of you. 

“I have been hurt in the past.” You just say. 

“And you are afraid I will hurt you the same?” Thrawn whispers with his rich voice. 

“I am not ‘afraid’ you will, I know you will.” 

“How can you be so sure?” 

“They did it out of commodity and maybe malice, you would do it out of necessity.” 

“I cannot imagine a situation where I would hurt you, even out of necessity.” He negociates. 

“No, it’s just...” You sigh, taking a deep breath, “I have been used before and now I want someone who would make me their priority, not just an afterthought!” 

His grip tightens ever so slightly around your shoulders and his purr stops, signifying that he is closely listening to our worries. 

“I do not plan to make you an afterthought in any capacity. If we start a relationship I will make sure to take care of you to the best of my capacities.” 

“You are a Grand Admiral, your agenda is full to the brim, and your days are packed. What kind of attention can you still spare at the end of a shift? You will drop like a fly, Sir.” 

His hand caressing your hair stops and sneaks under your chin to make you tilt your head to face him. You press your lips in a thin line as he details your face with his inquisitive gaze, unraveling your soul with his burning orbs, unclothing your heart to reveal every febrile hope and fear. 

"How can you be so sure of those claims?” He simply asks, so close you can feel his breath on your lips. 

“It is simple logic, Sir. You will never put me before your job, and you should not do it. But I need someone ready to put me first for once... Just once.” 

He releases your chin to cup your cheek with his large palm, his thumb caressing your thin skin tenderly. 

“(Y/n), I do not know what the future has in store for us, but I know I will forever regret it if I do not try with you.” He whispers, “You are right, I cannot put you before my work. But that does not mean that you should come after it. I can manage two important matters at the same time, I can take care of you while leading us to victory.” 

“A lot of exes made the same promise and they left me in the dirt when they got bored.” You simply assess, feeling tired of that charade. 

How many times did you dance that choreography already? Too many. 

“(Y/n), do you truly think I would do that? That I would waste both of our time for mindless fun and abandon you after? If I propose to you it is because I am confident in my capacity to give you everything you need. Look into my eyes and tell me: Is this how you think I am?” 

You look into his sihny eyes and sigh. 

“No... I do not think you would do that...” You concede, “You are not malicious.” 

“Then why not give us a chance?” He presses his forehead against yours, his thumb caressing your cheekbone. 

“Because... I could not survive you...” Your throat tightens as you speak. 

“What do you mean?” He demands with a soothing tone. 

“I may have been able to piece myself back together after them... But you, Sir, you would kill me. You would be my death.” You admit, lowering your tone. 

He tilts your head and reverently kisses your forehead in the secret darkness of the closet. 

“Then let me be your life. Every day I will be the force propelling you forward if you accept to intertwine your fate with mine... If you allow me to take your hand I will devote myself to you. You deserve to be loved and cared for, (Y/n) and it would be my privilege to make it my duty.” 

You sigh, tired, but lean on the warmth of his palm. 

“Promise me to think about it, (Y/n).” 

You hesitate, remembering all the tears and sleepless nights. 

But those eyes... So assured and confident, determined and reassuring... 

“... All right.” 

He brushes his nose with yours, his purr resuming. 

“I love you, (Y/n). You do not need to respond yet, just know that I adore you.” 

In the secrecy of that tight closet, you press yourself against Grand Admiral Thrawn, selfishly reveling in the love and warmth that you refuse to give back for now.  

“I do not promise anything.” You temper. 

“I know. But the fact that you agreed to consider it is enough for me. I will patiently wait for you and your response. And whatever your response may be, I will not stop loving you, even from afar.” 

You hesitate but finally wrap your arms around his chest, and think you felt his heart jolt at that, but you cannot be sure. What you can be sure, however, is the resuming of the purring. 

You do not know what the future holds for you, but right now, his embrace is the only place you want to be in.  

Even if it is selfish. 

Even if it may be the only one time you ever feel it around you. 

But maybe... 

Not. 

“If tie your fate to mine, either in love or friendship, I will devote myself to you. I promise you in this instant.” 

And he reverently kisses your forehead as to seal his words. 

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