#committing a crime just so she arrests me

[holylulusworld]

Jerk next door (7) - Plans to make

 

Summary: You move in next door to a jerk after a bad breakup.

Pairing: Andy Barber x fem!Reader

Characters: Destroyer!Chris, Captain Syverson

Warnings: angst, mentions of past domestic violence (implied), mentions of divorce, mentions of past physical abuse, scared reader, mentions of past alcohol abuse, rueful Andy, mentions of murder

Jerk next door (6) - Two new players 

Jerk next door masterlist

Syverson rolls his eyes. For the better part of five hours, Andy tries to devise a better plan than killing your ex. “I can make it look like an accident. Trust me.”

“Sy, even if you make it look like an accident, it’s still murder. We are better than this rotten bastard. I don’t think Y/N wants to live with the knowledge that she’s the reason for Beck’s death.”

“What if he’s getting into an accident? We could manipulate his car; this way, Y/N won’t feel guilty,” Chris throws in. He grunts as Andy shakes his head again. “It’s a good plan.”

“Again—it’s still murder, Chris. No killing him,” Andy points at Chris. “I know you’d love to take this man down, but we can’t run around and kill people.”

Chris shows his palms and says, “Fine, fine. No killing. What else can we do? You must admit that we can’t protect Y/N for the rest of her life. She wants her home and life back.”

Sy rubs his scruffy chin. He wrinkles his forehead while trying to come up with a better plan. When Andy called, Sy had already decided to take Quentin down. “What if—” he takes his time before he says. “He commits a crime and gets caught with his hand in the cookie jar.”

“Now, that’s what I’m talking about,” Chris chuckles and slams his hand onto his thigh. “I knew you’d come up with a fucked-up plan. So, how do we do it?”

“It’s a rough draft,” Sy grumbles. “It’s the only way to make sure he cannot harm Y/N and won’t come back. If he’s locked away, there’s no way out.”

Andy frowns. He doesn’t share Chris and Sy’s enthusiasm. The skilled lawyer knows better than to keep his hopes high when it comes to justice. Sometimes you can give it all, and you will still lose. “If he gets sentenced. You know better than to have faith in our judicial machinery.”

Sy scoffs. “You’re an attorney lawyer and don’t believe in the system you defend every fucking day?”

“YES!” Andy barks and throws his hands up. “I see the worst scum walk out of the courtroom every day. I don’t have faith in the system most of the time. It disappointed me over and over again in the last few years. Even if he gets arrested after we faked a crime, there’s no guarantee he won’t get out.”

“Andy is not wrong,” Sy nods thoughtfully. “So, back to killing him?” He smirks at Andy. “Come on, you know that there is no other way. If you want Y/N to be safe, you must get your hands dirty.”

Andy grits his teeth and says, “No murder. Do you think they won’t look for Y/N? You know what the cops think, Chris. The partner, or ex-partner, is always suspect number one.”

“He’s not wrong, Sy,” Chris hates to admit that Andy is right. “We can’t kill him, and there’s no guarantee he won’t leave the courtroom as a free man.”

“What if I just give up?” You step inside the room. All three men look at you, following your every step as you sit down on the couch in Andy’s living room. “There’s no way out. Nowhere to run to. He wins.”

Andy winces because you look tired and worn out. It’s his fault. He blamed you for something you didn’t do, and there is no denying, he ruined your life. “No.” He simply says. “We won’t let him win. I lose against monsters like him in the courtroom. I won’t lose against that bastard.”

Burying your face in your hands, you sniffle. You don’t want Andy to watch you cry. He’s still the neighbor making your life a living hell. “Why do you even care? This is what you wanted! From the first moment you saw me, you wanted me to leave! I’ll be gone soon. Good job!”

“Christ, can you stop being so—” Andy sighs when you flinch at his harsh tone. “I know that I was the worst. Please believe me that I regret what I did. Let me at least try to make things up to you. Quentin Beck won’t hurt you ever again.”

“Alright,” Sy claps his hands. “It’s getting late. We won’t come up with a good plan tonight. I’ll take over the first shift and keep an eye on your house, Andy. Chris, you can take over in three hours.”

“Got it,” Chris says and gets up from his seat. “I’ll check on Y/N’s house and make my round. Sy, be careful. We shouldn’t underestimate that slimy piece of shit.”

“Got it.” Sy tips his hat before walking out of the living room. “I’ll be in my hideout, Andy. You know the signal.”

“Got it.” Andy nods. You stare at Andy. Everyone seems to get their plan. Everyone but you. There’s not a chance that Quentin will leave you alone. You lost hope the moment you heard he was in town. “Y/N, you should get some sleep. Sy, Chris, and I will make sure that he won’t even get close to you.”

You’re too tired and emotionally drained to argue. Maybe it’s better to not see your end coming.

The floor creaks heavily under the intruder’s weight. He didn’t expect Andy’s house to be an obstacle. It was easy enough to get access to the neighborhood and to find out that his lovely ex-wife’s house is right next to Andy’s.

“Darling,” he whispers lowly. “If you let that bastard touch you, you’re going to regret it.” He hums and slowly creeps upstairs. He waited long enough for the other man to leave.

“What are you doing at my house?” Andy stands only a few feet away, watching Quentin’s face contort in anger. “You know, breaking and entering is a crime. And I have the right to defend my home and my girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” Quentin growls. He gets his gun out, aiming at Andy’s chest. “You’ll pay for hiding that bitch from me!”

Andy dodges the first bullet by dropping to the ground. He rolls behind the couch and waits for his chance.

“Do you think you can dodge the next bullet, too?” Quentin laughs and shoots in Andy’s direction. He hits the wall, but nothing else. Picture frames drop to the ground and shatter. “Huh? Get out, coward!”

“You should’ve counted your bullets.” Andy gets up from behind the couch. He smirks before firing three bullets into Quentin’s chest. “What a pity, you broke into my house and tried to kill me and your ex-wife. What else could I do but give you what you deserve?”

Tags in reblog.

[stargun2307]

Rotfront Five-O

A cop show centering on Sergeant Maryland, STAR-R50-07, a criminal investigator working under Rotfront Sector 50’s Office of the Inspector General.

My headcanon for this would be that only officer STARs in this agency assist with criminal investigations, taking on a position similar to a police detective. The rest of the squad is deployed for civil enforcement (curfew, traffic) and serving warrants based on the outcome of the investigations. Where are the Storches in the OIG? Riding a desk like good commissioned officers do, obviously /j

If you’ve read my other headcanon posts, you already know how Maryland’s career at Rotfront ends: she does a big oopsie and gets transferred to S-23 Sierpinski to serve out the rest of her operational lifespan. And gets demoted. Her one contribution to S-23’s Protektor force is the introduction of the US states naming convention for the squad she’s assigned to.

[rigginsstreet]

sometimes i'll be watching a video or reading up about a certain mental illness from people living with it and im like "oh some of these things are hitting..." but not to an extent that it debilitates my life? but also it feels like its certainly happening more than it should for like normal people lmao and i can never tell if these are just symptoms of my anxiety that cause certain feelings to be heightened or if theres something else going on

[susiephone]

ken getting arrested alongside barbie after she punches the guy who smacks her ass presents so many possibilities

ken saw barbie punch the douchebag and was like “LET’S MAKE THIS A PARTY” and joined in on the smackdown

alternatively, the guy’s friends tried to jump in and ken wasn’t having ANY of that

ken saw barbie getting shoved into a big car with bright lights on the top and was like “OH BOY! can i come too?? 😊😊” and just kind of tagged along

alternatively, he realized what was going on and was like “EXCUSE ME OFFICER i too have committed A Crime so please show me to The Jail with my beautiful girlfriend” so they wouldn’t be separated

ken got in trouble for trying to help barbie escape but in his defense no one TOLD him resisting arrest is a crime because no one told him what being arrested or crime is

ken didn’t know who these men showing up to take his girlfriend away were, but he could see she was very upset and excuse?? you cannot take barbie away from ken without her permission??? so long story short, ken punched a cop

ken fully burned something down earlier and the cops were like “two birds one stone” when they came to get barbie

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny, at 17, did not have the best love life. This is partially because two of his must haves in a partner are " Will protect me with their life" and "Will commit unspeakable acts of violence for me" or at least beat someone up for his honor.

Naturally, this doesn't always result in the most stable of partners.

His first girlfriend, Valerie, became an anti-hero and broke up with him for his safety.

He finally got with Sam in sophomore year only for the feds to come into class one day to arrest her. To his surprise, her crimes had nothing to do with ghosts but rather an incident where she went too far and committed a few acts of economic terrorism. Danny and Tucker never really learned the specifics of the crimes, and her parents hushed up as many news outlets as they could, so there wasn't much info to go around. All they knew was that she saved thousands of lives by doing it.

In the end, she was sentenced to eight years, and she broke up with him so that he wouldn't wait around for her to get out.

His third partner was a guy named David who was really sweet. Unfortunately, Danny got kidnapped one day by David's arch nemesis, who was some villain with a corny edge lord name. Yeah. David had become a a super hero after they started dating.

And if you guessed that he freaked out and dumped Danny for his own protection, you'd deserve a cookie.

Danny was noticing a pattern here. One that continued with everyone he dated. They always became some kind of hero before dumping him for his own protection, and it was infuriating. Sure, danny could defend himself, but he was never deep enough into the relationship to reveal his phantom half, and frankly, his hero career was something he left behind when he left Amity and destroyed the portals.

He met Tim at a skatepark after Tim fell off his board cause of some jerk speeding out in front of him on his own board, forcing Tim to stop or else hit the guy. The guy was unrepentant and Tim calmed him down (this did not stop him from melting the guys wheels with an ectoblast when no one was looking).

Tim then asked him to coffee. Danny, noticing how cute Tim was, agreed.

Danny was up front with his parents being mad scientists in Illinois. He always was with all the people he dated. It was better not to hide these kinds of things or worse, wait until you're already attached and afraid of losing them. So he always told potential partners as early as possible. Tim seemed a bit put off by this but was calmer about it than most, and they continued chatting.

Tim didn't seem like the type to turn to heroism or anti heroism so he felt safe on their later dates. It was only after he had known Tim for a while that he put the pieces together.

Tim was always covered in bruises that he hid with his clothes and make up, he had complained about batman over the phone when he thought danny couldn't hear, he was rich, he knew how to fight as revealed by his stances and footwork dispite trying to pretend he didn't, and lastly he held a lot of political power and influence being Bruce Wayne's son. Power he had no reservations using when it suited him or he was just feeling petty (that pettiness was part of why danny was falling for him harder than he thought he could)

No wonder Tim was so okay with his parents being rouges.

Tim was a villain!

At least Tim wouldn't leave him like all his exes. Danny doesn't think he could handle it if he did. Another good thing about this is now he can talk more freely about the more villainous and morally gray ideas and inventions when he was alone with Tim.

Tim didn't see anything wrong with Danny's idea to use something similar to cloning pods to make synthetic meats like rump roasts and steaks as a way to end world hunger and was eager to add to the conversation.

[wonderjanga]

The IRS

Billy doesn’t pay taxes. Anything related to taxes, he doesn’t know about.

M’gann: “What’s an IRS?”

Kid Flash “They’re these guys who collect taxes.”

M’gann: “Really? I’ve never paid taxes before. Are they gonna come after me?” *sounds slightly concerned*

Kid Flash: “Maybe-”

Marvel: *comes out of the kitchen with cookies* “No, they’re not. M’gann, the IRS isn’t real.”

M’gann: “It isn’t?”

Marvel: “Yeah, it isn’t. Wally’s just pulling your leg.”

Kid Flash: “Uh… no, no I’m not… Marvel you do know IRS is real, right? It’s important to me that you know that.”

Marvel: “Well, they’ve never come for me and I haven’t paid a single tax in my life.”

Kid Flash: *sounds completely concerned* “That means you’re committing tax fraud.”

Later…

YJ and Marvel: *all huddled around Tim who’s hunched over a computer*

Marvel: “Why’s is everyone here?”

Robin!Tim: “What do you mean, Cap? This is a celebratory moment. We didn’t even know you could commit a crime, yet here we are.” *typing on computer*

Marvel: “Why’d you pull up C.C. Batson?”

Robin!Tim: “Cap, you’re not exactly hiding your face. Anyone could find out who you were if they just dug a little deeper than the surface.”

Artemis: “Your name is C.C.?” *tries to see the computer*

Robin!Tim: “Charles actually.”

Zatanna: “You look like a Charles.”

Marvel: “I do? Huh. Well, anyways, I’ve been legally pronounced dead so I shouldn’t have to pay them right?”

Robin!Tim: “Well, you’re alive now. That means that you technically faked your death and that also technically means that you’re committing tax fraud so…” *types on computer* “You should owe 5 billion to the IRS.”

Marvel: *sounds completely devastated* “WHAT?”

Aqualad: “How could he possibly have racked up that much?”

Robin!Tim: “Well, Cap’s been “dead” *does quotes with his hands* since 1958 so he put off 66 years of taxes. Plus, the price of a dollar went up as the years passed so yeah.”

Marvel: “Oh my gods…” *sounds like he’s about to have a mental breakdown*

Kid Flash: “Wow. You’re actually an egregious tax evader. 5 billion is insane.”

Even More Later…

Batman: *came to check on the kids*

Marvel: *in a corner, rocking back and forth, practically crying*

Batman: “What’s wrong with him?”

Robin!Tim: “He owes 5 billion to the IRS.”

Batman: “…What?”

Robin!Tim: “Yeah, I know, right?”

Batman and Robin!Tim: *watch as Conner comes by and puts a bunch of blankets on Marvel. They then see M’gann come in with some hot coco and hand it to Cap*

Batman: *sighs* “I’ll get the money.” *walks away*

Robin!Tim: “Hey, Cap! You can stop worrying now! Batman is gonna hook you up.

And that’s how, after much refusal from Billy and a lot of peer pressure from both the YJ and Mr. Batman, itty bitty Billy Batson ended up with 5 billion dollars. And since he didn’t want to be arrested for tax evasion, he was too scared to hand it over to the IRS. (It’s not like he knew how to pay them anyways) But hey, Billy now gets to treat himself, Mary, and Freddy. They now have a decent apartment, better clothes, and lots and lots of food money, and potentially toy money? Billy’s been eyeing these Bulletman and Bulletgirl action figures for his and Mary’s birthday coming up. He hopes Mary will like them, or at least the Bulletgirl figure, he knows she’s a big fan.

Also, I have no idea if the 5 billion dollar thing is right, I pulled that from somewhere and I honestly forgot where.

[tossawary]

At the end of "Fullmetal Alchemist", Ed Elric quits the military, has given up his ability to "play god", and is (as he has been since he burned his fucking house down as a tweenager) homeless, disabled, and crashing at the Rockbell place to help his very sick brother recover.

And it's easy and funny to imagine Edward Elric essentially becoming the house husband of successful and innovative automail mechanic Winry Rockbell (and later a stay-at-home dad). Small family businesses are pretty much always a mess of needing an extra hand just to answer phones and the mail, to schedule appointments, to deliver and pick up parts, to organize stock, to "just hold this for a second for me", and so on. Pinako is not getting any younger and could use someone to cook dinner and fix the roof while she rests her back!!! Winry is busy!!!

There is also always a lot to do in a rural community, so I'm sure that Ed would find another hobby in the absence of alchemy and could turn it into a gig if necessary, if he really doesn't like automail. He has a lot of skills that he could potentially turn towards an income. I've also generally assumed that Ed made a pretty decent amount of money as a State Alchemist and still has some generous savings on that front.

But I was also thinking that it would be kind of funny if being a State Alchemist came with incredible retirement benefits. Like, the military wants to lure people in with wealth and power and resources - and then make alchemists desperate enough to keep these things that they become walking weapons of war, commit horrible crimes against humanity in the name of "research", and/or resort to human transmutation and become viable sacrifices. Ed never had to worry about getting kicked out (and presumably losing his benefits) because he was a perfect human sacrifice from the get-go (although he didn't know this). I'm guessing a lot of State Alchemists were never actually able to retire between dying in wars, failing out of the program (the brass finding excuses to save money! Bosses are always cheap!), getting arrested for speaking out or actually getting caught publicly doing bad shit, and being murdered for their crimes against humanity.

But, in theory, maybe the State Alchemist retirement benefits were absolutely incredible if you could somehow survive long enough or get permission for an early, "honorable" retirement, because King Bradley (who let's say set up this financial bait) somewhat reasonably assumed that Father would completely destroy the country before he'd ever have to pay out a pension. Which means that Ed could be out of the military for years and somehow still costing Roy Mustang a lot of money.

[solaireverie]

aa23 | put it into speed drive

summary: [ lawyer!alex albon x f!driver!reader — social media au ] alex is contracted to help you get out of trouble after you land in hot water

faceclaim: florence pugh

warnings: language, dirty jokes

author’s note: hello party people!! so happy to bring you the first installment of in their shoes, my series with @lorarri about driver!reader. chaotic reader is the love of my life frfr

liked by landonorris, redbullracing, tatemcrae and 4,582,193 others

yourusername eat pasta drive fasta 🏎🍝

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user mother is mothering 😩

user i live for y/n's photodumps

user everyone say thank you y/n for feeding us!!

redbullracing let her cook 😌

user the way y/n looks at the camera in slide 2 🫣

liked by christianhorner, sebastianvettel, redbullusa and 9,105,273 others

tagged: yourusername

redbullracing Oracle Red Bull Racing is aware of the charges being brought against driver Y/N L/N. Oracle Red Bull Racing respects all official decisions and will be assisting Y/N in any legal proceedings. We ask for privacy and discretion during this period of time.

comments on this post have been disabled

7,482 likes

y/nupdates y/n left the monaco police station this morning accompanied by her lawyer, alex albon. alex is also a family friend and was contracted by red bull to help y/n with any legal issues that may arise. y/n and alex left on motorcycle shortly after she was released. when asked about recent events, y/n stated that she isn't worried and that she's in good hands (implied to be alex's)

pictured above: y/n this morning, a photo captured by passerby of alex on his bike waiting for y/n, and a picture of alex found on his firm's website

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user y/n's slaying everywhere 😍 even getting arrested isn't stopping her from serving with every outfit

↪ user omg fr i love her jacket and boots

↪ user we should have a y/n style account ngl

user damn her lawyer's hotttt 😳

↪ user yeah exactly!!! so glad someone else sees my ✨ vision ✨

user lol i can already see this dude getting a migraine within the first two hours of dealing with y/n

↪ user she's a menace and while i love her for that i pity her lawyer 😂

↪ user our thoughts and prayers for mr albon 🕯🕯🕯

628,192 likes

effwontea ok so who was going to tell me that y/n's lawyer is hot, cute, AND good with animals - admin g 👾

what crimes do i need to commit to hire alex to defend me 😳 - admin t 💃

view comments

user idk if anyone's noticed but he's actually in a few of her older vlogs 👀 guess they've been friends for a while

↪ user and she hasn't showed us him until now???

↪ user i went back to watch the videos with alex in them and omg they're so cute togetherrrrrr

↪ user ikr!!! did you see that part where she drives them around monaco and he's literally scared for his life but also staring at y/n with heart eyes 😍

↪ user guess this isn't the first time that y/n has terrorized alex with her driving skills then 😂

user is it just me or are they really freaking adorable together

↪ user omg fr!! he balances out her chaos and she makes him laugh so much ❤️ my heart can't take this

liked by landonorris, alex_albon, georgerussell63 and 28,492,123 others

tagged: alex_albon

yourusername everyone say thank you to alex_albon's savior complex 😌 love u 🫶

view comments

user did she just... hard launch???

↪ user i think???????

↪ user knowing y/n she kept him a secret just for the chaos 😂

georgerussell63 about time, mate!

↪ landonorris thanks a lot for making me lose my bet with george 🙄

↪ alex_albon what were you two even betting on?

↪ yourusername when i would get arrested and you'd have to defend me in court 😜 btw georgerussell63 i expect dinner from whatever lando needs to give you

alex_albon love you too (even if you exhaust me sometimes 🙃)

↪ yourusername don't lie, you like it 😘

user so now on top of dealing with y/n in court he has to deal with her every day 😭 thoughts and prayers dude

↪ yourusername i promised to behave in public if he lets me misbehave in private 😉

↪ alex_albon you call that behaving???

↪ landonorris ewww get a room

↪ yourusername get a win 🤷‍♀️

↪ georgerussell63 MIC. DROP.

↪ landonorris alex_albon can i hire you to sue y/n and george for emotional damage

↪ alex_albon i'm afraid that you're on your own 😔 i have no intention of stepping into a courtroom with y/n ever again

↪ yourusername guess who's sleeping on the couch tonight!

↪ alex_albon lando because he insists that we've adopted him?

↪ yourusername correct ✅

likes and reblogs are appreciated!

series masterlist | masterlist | lola's masterlist

taglist: @scenesofobx @vellicora @boiohboii @julesbabey @flannelforthetoads

[nyrasproblm]

And would you go ahead and just cry? 2/3

Jinx x fem!reader | Caitlyn x sister!reader

Summary: A conversation with your sister after Cassandra's death.

Word Count: 0,7K

Warnings: mention of character death, mention of PTSD attacks, mention of murder.

note: this chapter focuses on the reader's relationship with Caitlyn, so I apologize for not having any interactions with Jinx in it. But Vi does appear!!

ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE.

< previous chapter

You weren't surprised. You already knew she was going to do this, but not to this extent. It's not like you didn't understand her, Cassandra was your mother too, you were also grieving, your heart was hurting too.

But all of Zaun should not have to pay for the actions of just one person.

Walking quickly through the halls of the silent mansion, you could feel the anger emanating from you. Your steps stopped in front of the large door to Caitlyn's chambers, where you knocked and didn't wait for an answer to enter. The tall figure of your older sister stood in the center of the room, staring intently at the old map she left on the floor, and Vi's pink hair could be seen behind her, sitting on the bed.

You opened your mouth to question Caitlyn, but she spoke first: "You should measure your actions, like wait for me to answer before barging into my room. I'm sure you don't want to irritate me even more."

"Ah, don't start. I already know you know." you scoffed. "I'm surprised Commander Kiramman hasn't sent me to Stillwater yet."

"You have no consideration at all, do you? Or a brain?" she turned to you, the long blue cape shifting behind her. "How could you?"

"How could I what? Have a Zaunite friend? You have one there too." you nodded to Vi, who raised an eyebrow at you.

"Is it really that little to you?" Caitlyn sighed, her voice sounding weaker. "Don't you have any respect for Mom's memory?"

"I'm grieving too, Caitlyn. For God's sake." you sighed loudly. "But I can't let it take over me, or I won't be able to think straight."

"You don't seem like you're thinking straight." she raised her voice. "Mom dies and you're going to take comfort in her killer?"

"She didn't mean to do that! She was having an attack. You said you've seen it before." you exclaimed. "And I didn't come here to talk about her. The engineers told me that you want to shut down the ventilation system there."

"This is official business, it's about the search and capture of a criminal," she replied. "You shouldn't question me, I know what I'm doing."

"Have you lost your mind?! You can't do this, do you want to end everything?" you almost screamed. "How can you say I don't care about Mom's memory if you're the one trying to destroy it?"

"No one will get hurt. My team was only ordered to capture Jinx and nothing more." she said almost automatically.

"Caitlyn, our mom thought about the quality of life of those people when she had that ventilation system created. And I felt honored when she asked me to improve her creation." you murmured. "The Grey is toxic, you can't say no one will get hurt. You'll have protective masks, the people down there have nothing."

"You shouldn't even be here, you should be thankful I didn't have you arrested for siding with and not cooperating with the search for Mom's killer." she growled.

"What are you talking about now?" you fumed.

"Were you the one who gave her that hextech gem?" she frowned even more angrily.

"Of course not! Why would I do that?" you put your hands on your hips.

"If you stayed with her after she killed our mother, I don't doubt what you would do for her before that." She lowered her voice.

You laughed in derision, shaking your head, "You gave your girlfriend who just got out of jail an enforcer position, is that any different?"

Vi got up from the bed when she was mentioned. "I was wrongly arrested, I didn't commit any crime."

"Oh, shut up, you too." you rolled your eyes, irritated. "Aren't you ashamed of wearing that uniform? Your sister is alone and scared and here you are playing police officer."

"You don't know anything about me, and I doubt you know anything about Jinx either." she walked over to you and Caitlyn. "What do you think you are? A vigilante? Doing good deeds for the poor? You don't know anything about being in need. You've been up here your whole life."

"But I know very well what decency and loyalty are. Standing firm for what you believe in." you replied. "And I see that is not your case."

Vi's face twisted into an angry expression and she threatened to advance towards you, but was stopped by Caitlyn, who turned back to you: "That's enough. Our operation is going to happen, whether you like it or not. I suggest you stay away from Zaun, I'll leave enforcers to... look after you. Be thankful you're not trapped."

You huffed and turned to leave the room.

[fluentmoviequoter]

We've Got a Problem

Requested Here!

Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!fiancée!reader

Summary: When you get arrested on Tim's day off, you have to call someone to get you out of jail. Tim doesn't answer when you call, but when he finds out what happened, he makes it a bigger problem.

Warnings: grumpy!Tim, fluff, mentions of homicide and drug trafficking; reader doesn't commit any crimes, so misunderstanding?

Word Count: 1.1k+ words

Picture from Pinterest

You can't decide what's funnier: that you are in police custody, that the arresting officers refused to believe that you are Tim Bradford's significant other, or that Tim isn't answering his phone.

When you switch tactics to call Wesley Evers instead of Tim, you decide that the last option is the funniest part of this ordeal.

"Hey," Wesley answers.

"This isn't a personal call," you begin with a chuckle. "Would you believe me if I said I'm currently being detained at LAPD Mid-Wilshire division on suspicion of a triple homicide and drug possession?"

"I really hope for Tim's sake you're joking."

"I'm not. I need a lawyer, Wesley. But I also need to ask you to find Tim to get me out. No one here will believe that he's my fiancé and he's not answering my calls."

"Can't imagine why they're so sure he's single. I'll get him down there and ask for the evidence. We'll get this thrown out, don't worry."

"I'll stop worrying when I'm out of here. Thank you, Wesley."

“Don’t hang up, I’m patching Tim in.”

“What do you want, Wesley?” Tim asks when the line connects.

“I want to know why you answer for him but not for me,” you interject.

Tim says your name before asking, “Where are you?”

“Jail,” you and Wesley answer together.

“What? Which station?”

“That’s your question?” Wesley replies. "Not what she did?"

“Your station,” you answer. “And I’d like to go home.”

“I’m on my way. Wesley, talk to me.”

“They’ve got her on suspicion of homicide and drug trafficking. Angela sent me part of the case file and it seems like you fit the physical description of the suspect, but that’s it. I have no doubt we can get this thrown out by the end of the day.”

“Tim, I’m sorry,” you offer. “I know it’s your day off.”

“At least it’s a good story,” he grumbles.

“Tim, I may have told a few cops that I’m your fiancée. They didn’t believe me, but I- I’m sorry for telling them.”

“Fantastic. I’m hanging up, I’ll be inside in a minute.”

“How mad is he really?” Wesley asks.

“I don’t think I want to know. Maybe I should’ve just asked you to come.”

“Good luck.”

✯✯✯✯✯

Tim yells your name when he walks into the holding area. He looks at you as you stand, walking to the cell door as another officer unlocks it.

“I’m really sorry,” you whisper as you step out.

“Later,” Tim answers, gesturing for you to follow him.

You walk behind Tim and the officer, waiting by Tim’s side as he completes paperwork.

“And what’s your relationship?” the officer behind the desk asks.

“I’m her fiancé,” Tim answers.

The officer raises his eyebrows but nods as he slides a paper to Tim. Tim carries the paper in one hand, raising his other arm to direct you into a nearby office.

“Sergeant Grey, a word?” Tim asks.

“Sure. Who’s your friend?”

You say your name, shaking Sergeant Grey’s hand.

“My fiancée. Celina and Nolan just booked her on suspicion for Lopez’s case.”

Sergeant Grey presses his lips together but fails to hide his smile as he begins laughing, leaning backward while he wipes an amused tear from his eye.

“Let me guess, you told them that you’re with Bradford and they didn’t believe you.”

“Uh, exactly,” you answer, surprised at how quickly he determined what happened.

“I’ll talk to Nolan,” Grey promises.

“I can do it,” Tim responds.

“No, Bradford, I’ll handle it. It won’t happen again.”

“It better not, or I’ll intervene.”

“I’m sorry,” Grey tells you. “The charges won’t be filed, so you’re not going to be impacted other than the inconvenience this afternoon. I apologize on behalf of the entire department.”

“It’s not a problem,” you answer softly.

“It is a problem,” Tim says before exiting the office. “Nolan!”

“Tim,” you call, rushing out after him. “What’re you doing? They didn’t even believe me about you.”

“Not the biggest problem. Nolan!”

“Uh, yes?” Nolan asks, glancing over Tim’s shoulder at you.

“You arrested my fiancée on a completely baseless allegation. Because she looks a bit like a suspect in a huge case. That is not good police work, that’s being lazy and making connections where there are none.”

“I-“

“Unless you’re about to apologize, stop talking. Care to explain why you heard my name and didn’t do anything?”

“She claimed to be your fiancée. What was I supposed to do, just believe who I thought was a suspect in numerous felony cases?”

“Doesn’t sound like an apology.”

“What are you so mad about? I did my job.”

“You did what you think your job is. As a TO, it is on you to make sure Celina is prepared to do her job without you. Bringing people in because they fit what is possibly the most generic physical description ever is not being a good officer.”

“This doesn’t sound like letting me handle it,” Grey says, stepping out of his office.

Tim clenches his jaw before pointing at Nolan. “For the record, she is my fiancée and I will not forget this.”

“You have a fiancée?” Nyla asks as she stops in the middle of the bullpen. “Wait, are you the one who got brought in for Angela’s felonies? The one who called Wesley?”

“Yeah,” you answer, supplying your name as you introduce yourself.

“Oh, this story needs to be told.”

“Don’t,” Tim warns.

Nyla pulls her phone from her pocket, smiling as she types. “Too late.”

“So much for my day off,” Tim grumbles.

“I got arrested today, and you had a long day?” you ask.

“We’re leaving.”

Tim leads you to his truck, sighing as he sits back in the driver’s seat.

“Tim-“

“Don’t apologize again. I’m not mad at you, for anything. Just… this is so stupid,” Tim concludes, smiling as he laughs.

“You’re telling me. Although Nolan and Juarez got a good laugh out of the idea of you having a fiancée.”

“I don’t think that’s funny,” Tim responds. “I think I just got very lucky.”

You smile, leaning across the console to kiss Tim.

“Excuse me, you’re parked in a tow-away zone. Tim?” an officer asks through the open window. She gasps before asking, “Is this your fiancèe?”

“Bye, Chen.”

Tim pulls out before she can say anything else, and you laugh at his dramatic sigh.

“Can you stay out of trouble for the rest of my day off?” he asks.

“I may need some incentive.”

“Then spend it with me. Not calling Wesley Evers from a jail cell.”

“Deal.”

You take Tim’s hand and smile. He brushes his thumb over your knuckles, keeping you close as he drives to his house.

"Wait, we should take a picture," Tim says after parking in his driveway.

"For what?"

"To commemorate your first arrest."

You roll your eyes but smile anyway. Tim takes the picture, and when he looks down to see how it turned out, you cup his face in your hands and kiss him. While he's thoroughly distracted, you try to grab his phone, but he moves it before pulling you closer. Maybe getting arrested and letting Tim's coworkers know he's engaged wasn't all bad.

[satansapostle6]

Love The Sinner | Dexter Morgan

Dexter Morgan, a vigilante serial killer hiding in plain sight, loses sleep for the first time in his life when he’s met with the very last thing he expected: a kindred spirit.

Warnings: Violence. Mature language and themes. Sexual content.

Part One. Eyes of Darkness.

Most people, when they’re getting arrested, shit their pants with fear. Some scream, some cry. Some rage, and some try to run, and some just freeze. That’s what you usually see, when you’re in your parents’ living room, and your dad can’t wait to turn on the TV to the channel dickety-six news, of all things. But sometimes, people have other reactions when being handcuffed and shoved in the back of a squad car. Sometimes people enjoy it, for one reason or another. I smiled when Miami Metro put me in cuffs on the news. Laughed, even. You see my story is many things, but boring certainly isn’t one of them.

Let’s start simple. My name is Nicole Carvalho, and as of today, America knows me as ‘Murderous MILF’. You really can’t make these things up; I love this country. I keep reminding myself, if I ever go free, I need to clip that out of the newspapers. But see, right now, at this very moment, I’m sitting alone in an almost blindingly white interrogation room at the precinct, waiting for a cop to question me while they study me on the surveillance footage. I can’t lie, I’m sitting back right now in my chair, smirking. You see, I killed the men who violated and later took my baby girl’s life, and I’m currently very pleased with myself.

I don't think my grandfather pictured this when he left Brazil. This truly is the American dream; committing a crime and letting your own peers decide whether or not it was justified. In all honesty, a jury will be much kinder to me than ‘God’ has been. So, I figured I’d let myself have this one thing. I think I waited about a half an hour before they sent someone in; a female detective. They must’ve figured a matching vagina couldn’t hurt. The first thing I noticed about this detective was that she was strikingly young; close to my age. I’m thirty-six, so I would estimate her to be maybe a little younger.

But apart from her age, the next thing I noticed about this detective was that she was very robotic in how she interacted with me; she didn’t necessarily look like she wanted to be there. She barely looked up at me when she came in, holding my files and looking down at them like a teenager doing a presentation in high school.

“So. Nicole Carvalho. I’m Detective Morgan.”

She sits down across from me less like I’m a murder suspect and more like she’s interviewing me for a secretary job. I look at her, sitting forward as I join her in the conversation, still smug as ever. I think she was secretly hoping I’d say it, the four words that usually drove most cops insane that, for some reason, no one ever thinks to say in the movies.

“I want my lawyer.”

I smile as I say it. Detective Morgan also smiles, looking down at the table before getting up. I’ll never forget how pleased she sounded.

“Guess that means I can’t ask you anymore questions.”

She gets up and walks out, and that’s the end of it. In all honesty, I don’t think she was looking forward to questioning a woman about the murder of her daughter’s rapist. After the detective left me alone, I was allowed to call myself the lawyer that I had in mind. This, of course, was a friend of a friend, a perfectly shady guy named Johnny Bertelli, who was, in the nicest way possible, a fucking scum bag. You see, I work as a project manager at a marketing firm, so I’ve met my fair share of good lawyers, but Johnny was the fucking best.

He made Johnnie Cochran look like an idiot. He was the kind of lawyer who laughed at the prosecution in court, and I needed him. So there i was, in the Miami Metro precinct punching a number I’d gotten off Google into a wall phone. I looked around the precinct as I waited for someone to pick up, and suddenly it was like I felt a pair of eyes on me. I turned around, and I saw a pretty timid, mild-mannered looking guy who seemed as if he’d been standing there trying to figure out how to get my attention.

But the strange thing was, he didn’t seem to want my attention, at all, actually. If anything, he seemed perturbed by the fact that I was looking his way. I looked over at him, not knowing what the fuck his story could’ve been. Miami’s a weird place, because in this moment, I realized the guy wandering the precinct in a Polo and khakis could very well be an employee. I looked at the guy, not knowing what he could’ve wanted with me as I struggled with the phone. Funny enough, he actually just wanted to be helpful.

“You gotta press pound,” he says quietly, “For the call to go through,” and I almost laugh.

I appreciate the odd moment, just thanking him.“Thank you.”

He just nods, and says nothing as he quietly retreats to wherever it was he came from. I took his advice, and sure enough, the phone worked and patched me through to Johnny’s office. I wasn’t quite sure at the time, seeing as I was obviously a bit preoccupied, but I felt that strange man’s eyes linger on me for a moment. Even as I turned around, I could sense his surreal sort of presence that he had. Sure, I was used to having men’s leering eyes on me out in public; it was hardly unusual. But this was different.

Like he was less looking at my body and flesh, but more so imagining what was underneath it.

*****

The next couple years of my life were eventful, to say the fucking least. Johnny of course advised me to take my case to trial instead of taking a plea, for obvious reasons; there was no way any jury was going to give me the maximum sentence, or God forbid, the death penalty. I was a single mother who stabbed her twelve year-old daughter’s rapist seventeen times. In the eyes of the public, I was practically a fucking hero. Johnny’s confident that any jury would feel sympathetic to me, despite the brutality of what I’d done. As he says, the facts are still there.

My neighbor, a weasley little creep named George Randall got me, and my Isabelle, to trust him, and took advantage of her in the worst way. Then she killed herself, because of what he did, and I had to find out through a note left on her desk for me to find. So, I went to George’s with an empty baking dish of his, and once he let me in, I whipped out the knife I’d borrowed from him, the same knife I used to use to cook for my little girl, and I made his stomach burst like a water balloon. At this point, I’d already chosen to show little remorse for the crime I’d committed, feeling perfectly at peace with the possibility of prison, or the death penalty.

But Johnny said there was probably no need to be too fearful of either. He’d even told me there was a possibility I’d just get a few years, and then parole, or something, and I wasn’t sure that wasn’t bullshit, but I also liked his confidence. The reality of it was, Johnny had made much worse people look way better. To him, my case was already closed. All I had to do was play the part of the grieving mother, which took no effort on my part. I had to wait almost a year for my case to go to trial, which I of course did outside of a cell.

This gave me enough time to get all my affairs in order, or so to speak. My job was okay for the time being, and I knew I’d probably still have it so long as I wasn’t convicted of murder, given my ‘years of dedicated service’. Things were going to be relatively fine, eventually, but for now, I was stuck being paraded around like a jester on some twisted apology tour for avenging my daughter’s death. I’m a pretty good actor, but even my patience has its limits. And maybe wearing my white So Kate’s to court wasn’t necessarily the best judgement call.

But Johnny, being more than worth the money I pay him, made it work. I walked into the courtroom with him, humble and graceful, and didn’t let my eyes linger so as not to appear guilty. But even then, I caught a glimpse of him in the room. The guy who helped me with the phone. He was watching my trial, probably just as a police department employee. Probably.

“Will the defendant please rise?”

I complied with Judge Willis’s request, with my trusty guard dog by my side. I remained dignified, my head held high, but not too high, of course, as the proceedings began.

“Miss Carvalho. How do you plead?”

“Not guilty, your honor,” I told him.

The damage was done. My fate rested entirely in the hands of twelve strangers, and for some reason, there was a thirteenth who seemed oddly invested in the outcome.

-

Part Two.

[heyftinally]

Y'all are going to like this one.

SWIFTIES DON'T TOUCH THIS POST WITH A TEN FOOT POLE, I SWEAR TO FUCKING HELL-

So my friend sent me this article, and I'm going to tell you why I think it's complete bullshit.

1) wishing us a happy Pride month is the BARE MINIMUM. As someone with her presence in the media and social influence, she could - and should - be doing SO much more than just wishing us a happy pride four days in.

2) "the singer has been an advocate for the LGBTQ+ community" not a good one. She seems to only remember us when it's convenient or benefits her in some way. Case in point:

2018 - "When it comes to feelings and when it comes to love and searching for someone to spend your whole life with. It's all just really really delicate. You know?" Taylor then performed her song "Delicate."

2023 - It’s painful for everyone, every ally, every loved one, every person in these communities.

In the first example, the intentional song reference comes off as extremely tacky. This is people's LIVES you're talking about. People are MURDERED for who they are and who they love (or don't love). This isn't an appropriate time to pull out the "oh-so-quirky" act and be cutesy.

In the second, the fact that she can't even center queer people in their own experience is so, SO telling. I promise, however painful it is for allies, it's 1000x worse for us to LIVE it. Allies don't have to wonder "am I going to get hate crimed wearing this?" before they leave the house - we frequently do. To not acknowledge that shows me that everything she says is performative at best.

3) I wouldn't call what she does "advocacy". She mentions us every now and then when it's convenient for her, profits off of us when we fit her marketing plan, and I've yet to find where she actually apologized for the homophobia in the original version of Picture to Burn. Also, she's real good friends with Travis Kelce's dad, who is a raging transphobe (and I bet his kids are, too). You don't get to call yourself an ally if you willingly allow the people around you to be violent bigots.

4) "always" is a strong word for someone who seems to show her support situationally at best. The full quote was "The way for that to happen is for us to continue to keep pushing governments to put protections in place for members of the LGBTQ community. And I promise to always advocate for that." Yet she doesn't do that.

5) what she speaks out, I've noticed that it's nearly always in the states that primarily agree with her. We don't see a whole lot of her "inspiring ally" speeches in places like Texas or Florida. But I've seen plenty of them come out of already notoriously queer-friendly places. If you aren't willing to face the heat of the difficult places along with the comfort of the easy ones, you don't get to call yourself an ally. Allyship is not easy. Anyone remember when Lady Gaga advocated for us in Russia, under threat of arrest, and her response was "arrest me, Russia! I don't give a fuck!"? Yeah, I've never seen even half that level of true commitment from Taylor.

6) STOP. MAKING. STRAIGHT GIRL SONGS. "GAY ANTHEMS"!!!! FFS it's such a slap in the fucking face of REAL, ACTUALLY QUEER ARTISTS that y'all keep calling these piss pathetic straight girl over produced crap songs "anthems". Fucking stop it. If they aren't queer, they don't qualify to be a queer anthem or icon. Start supporting ACTUAL queer artists with ⅛ this energy, for the love of FUCK. This bullshit pisses me off. Do you need a list of queer artists? I'll make you one by hand if you promise to stop trying to label Raylor Swift's straight girl shit songs as "gay anthems".

7) rainbows and gender subversion are not exclusively nor inherently queer. If that's our bar for "gay anthems", the bar is so low Lucifer himself needs a damn Webb Telescope to just barely see it from hell.

[maespri]

let's talk about the many crimes of the phantom thieves

hello and welcome to me detailing the many crimes of the persona 5 royal teenagers... my dearest friend and i got bored and decided to make a list of every crime they could potentially be charged with, and i thought i'd post it to get other people's thoughts (in case i missed any) + laugh about the insane shit they've pulled off.

lets go!!!

before we get into this: we did not count crimes that were committed within the metaverse, as it wouldn't be possible to really charge the phantom thieves. the only exception to this is goro. we counted his metaverse crimes because it made his laundry list of crimes funnier. that's all.

p.s.: i love studying criminology, but i know i'm not an expert by any means. if i mess something up, miss a crime, etc.- let me know!

now, let's get into it, in order from least to most crimes!

sumi yoshizawa commits zero crimes.

good for her... good for her...

ann takamaki commits one crime: battery.

aside from ryuji and haru (who also only commit one crime), ann has the shortest list of crimes with just one: battery. it's a stretch for sure, but technically, she does slap ryuji after shido's palace, and that does qualify as battery. good on her otherwise.

ryuji sakamoto commits one crime: assault.

side note for anyone who doesn't know: assault and battery are two different things. assault is the threat, battery is the action. for example: if i tell someone i'm going to punch them, that is assault. if i actually do punch them, that is battery. that's often why the two go hand-in-hand.

ryuji threatens people quite a bit, but we actually couldn't think of any instances where he goes through with said threats, excluding him punching kamoshida. because that happened pre-canon, however, and because kamoshida clearly didn't charge ryuji, we didn't count it.

haru okumura commits one crime: perjury.

haru lies to sae when being questioned about her father's death. and yes, lying to a prosecutor during a criminal investigation does count as lying to law enforcement in general.

makoto niijima commits three crimes: blackmail, hacking, and theft.

blackmail: makoto approaches the phantom thieves and blackmails them with a video of them stating their identities, threatening to leak it if they do not meet her demands.

hacking: makoto intentionally manipulates sae's laptop in order to steal documents from it.

theft: makoto steals confidential documents from sae's laptop.

ren amamiya/akira kurusu/the protagonist/joker commits three crimes: improperly bringing an animal onto public transportation, resisting arrest, and breaking and entering.

improperly bringing an animal onto public transportation: animals are allowed on most subways in japan if they are documented, in a proper carrier, and, at times, have been paid for with a proper fee. joker brings morgana onto the train every day without doing anything of the sort.

resisting arrest: joker runs from the police and attempts to escape when surrounded outside of sae's palace.

breaking and entering: in one of yusuke's later confidant events, joker picks the lock to madarame's house and enters.

yusuke kitagawa commits four crimes: plagiarism (charges would likely be dropped, however!), stalking, solicitation, and trespassing.

plagiarism: this one was really interesting to discuss with my buddy. yusuke does commit plagiarism by willingly handing over his artwork to madarame and allowing him to claim it as his own. however, it can be argued that he did so because he was being manipulated, abused, and was under duress* (madarame essentially claimed he would end up on the streets if he did not hand over his art). it can also be argued that because yusuke did not place any copyright infringement on his paintings, it wasn't really plagiarism. therefore, this charge would likely be dropped, either on the basis of insufficient evidence and/or his being under duress.

stalking: yusuke does stalk ann for a few days before speaking to her. because this action causes distress to ann (shown by her mentioning yusuke following her around a few days prior, as well as her initial reaction to meeting him), it falls under the category of stalking.

solicitation: yusuke solicits joker to commit the crime of breaking into madarame's house in one of his confidant events.

trespassing: when joker does break into madarame's house for him, yusuke enters.

*under duress: constraint illegally exercised to force someone to perform an act (AKA, forcing somebody to do something illegal via threats, blackmail, manipulation, guilt-tripping, etc.)

futaba sakura commits eight crimes: wiretapping, non-consensual surveillance, espionage, truancy, hacking, tampering, theft, and blackmail.

wiretapping: futaba hacks into phone lines (most notably, ren and akechi's) and listens in on conversations.

non-consensual surveillance: futaba tracks the GPS on a few people's phones.

espionage: futaba spies on people.

truancy: we don't know the full extent, but it is implied that futaba has missed a lot of school, which is a crime.

hacking: i hope i don't have to explain this one HAHA.

tampering: to send shido's calling card, futaba tampers with all the big screens around japan, which is tampering with property.

theft: futaba has stolen plenty of information, classified or not classified, from a loooot of different people.

blackmail: when she first asks the phantom thieves to change her heart, she does so through blackmailing them, threatening to reveal their identities if they don't do it.

goro akechi commits twelve crimes: attempted first-degree murder, mass first-degree murder, unlawful possession of a firearm, conspiracy, fraud, aiding and abetting, terrorism, assault, battery, perjury, blackmail, and obstruction of justice.

attempted first-degree murder: whilst akechi technically doesn't kill joker, he does try to, which means he can be charged with this.

mass first-degree murder: akechi murders. a LOT of people. which falls under this category.

unlawful possession of a firearm: in order to kill joker, akechi steals a gun from a police officer.

conspiracy: akechi states his plans to murder joker and plots it out in advance for a long, long, time.

fraud: faking joker's death certificate is a form of fraud.

aiding and abetting: helping shido kill people is aiding and abetting.

terrorism: terrorism is defined as "the unlawful use of violence and intimidation, especially against civilians, in the pursuit of political aims." akechi's actions fall under this category.

assault: akechi throws plenty of threats people's ways!

battery: and follows through on many of them.

perjury: akechi lies to all sorts of law enforcement around him, most notably sae and the guard outside of joker's interrogation room.

blackmail: akechi threatens to leak the identities of the phantom thieves if they don't infiltrate sae's palace.

obstruction of justice: by lying about what he knew about the phantom thieves, withholding information from law enforcement, and overall just completely messing with the case, akechi commits obstruction of justice.

that's it!

thank you for reading thank you for joining us joy to the world... shoutout again to my wonderful friend for being these guys' defense attorney's

BYE!!

[favslarue]

Pro-hero Katsuki Bakugo NSFW inspired by THE DINNER - Billie Eilish

Warnings: Rough sex, stalking, dirty talk, humiliation, cumming in mouth, spanking, office sex.

English is not my first language, 100% accept advices and correction in the grammar and vocabulary, but please be nice. 🥹

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆

You never thought that you would ever commit a crime worst than stealing to eat or getting into fights with other delinquents.

But then he arrested you after you had beaten the shit out of some rich kid who often were at your neighborhood, pretending they’re dangerous gang members.

When in fact, they’re just being used by the actual dealers, who know there won’t be big consequences for those kids, their parents will just pay the authorities and they will be free to sell those drugs to their rich friends again.

You knew that, you knew that the criminals you know wouldn’t let those people mess with your family, you knew that they weren’t shit

But for some reason, the moment your little brother came home crying saying they offered him drugs.

That one of them tried to persuade him to sell that shit too, saying that “your thot sister won’t have to sell her body to put food on the table anymore”.

That wasn’t truth, but still, your brother believed him for a moment. That fucking moment you saw red, you couldn’t control your anger.

The moment you jumped that teenager you weren’t thinking straight, you didn’t consider that your brother had nobody else than you.

And that gang of little pussies didn’t dared to do something to you, so they called the cops.

They called the fucking cops, but the pro hero Dynamight came with them. Your neighborhood had a fame, so they thought it was something way worse.

Next thing you know, you are in the prison cell, after listening all type of shit from that asshole’s father, it really didn’t matter if he was the gang member in the picture, you dared to touch that daddy’s boy.

After at least 2 or 3 hours sat there, still feeling the blood pounding in your chest, you hands and knees sore and bleeding. A female guard opened that cell.

- Y/N? got lucky someone paid you bail - The guard said, she clearly wasn’t happy.

- Me? Are you sure? - You were confused, you didn’t had a lot of people who cared for you, and those who did, almost didn’t had money to eat.

- Yeah! Dynamight did, even defended you when that kid’s dad were trying to take you on court - She wasn’t telling you that to be nice, she wanted to know what kind of relationship you had with the pro hero.

- The dad almost exploded when the number 1 hero yelled at his child for being a gang member! - She continued, trying to get something out of you. - He threatened to investigate the teenager and his friends. Do you know him?

- No! Never seen him in my life. - Why would he do that? You asked yourself.

Don't be afraid of me, I'm what you need

I saw you on the screens, I know we're meant to be

You're starrin' in my dreams, In magazines

After that, you stole a cellphone, it was easy considering your invisibility quirk. You needed to know more about that hero. Just out of curiosity.

You followed all the online forums about Dynamight.

When somebody opened a Live video of him saving someone you rushed to the place were it was happening, just to see him arresting the criminals and being interviewed.

You're lookin' right at me

I'm here around the clock

I'm waitin' on your block

And after that, you followed him home, every. single. time.

Sometimes you even dared to enter his house. The first time, you managed to get in as soon as he opened the door.

After sneaking in, you couldn’t find a way out, so you just spent the night there, watching him, learning his routine. You even discovered his real name, Katsuki Bakugo. You watched him sleep that night.

He clearly was agitated, he woke up scared and turned the lights on, walked two or three times around the house, to make sure he was alone, checked if the doors and windows were locked.

He was smart to notice something was wrong, but didn’t figure you were the one disturbing his sleep (or so you thought).

You left at morning, when he opened the windows to let the sunlight in the room.

Some weeks later you had already figured every single way in and out, but he was being more careful, he even adopted a guard dog.

It was a huge one, you even considered stopping your visits, but you realized quickly that it was a gentle dog. It got used to your presence very quickly.

Trying to conciliate your obsession and raising your brother was hard, so sometimes you would steal from his fridge. You knew he wouldn’t mind.

I waited on the corner 'til I saw the sitter leave

Was easy getting over and I landed on my feet

I came in through the kitchen lookin' for something to eat

I left a calling card so they would know that it was me

You were tired of only watching him, you wanted more. You wanted him.

So when you figured he needed a secretary, you took the chance.

Lying in your curriculum, you knew everything that he needed. And honestly, you needed the job.

You even eliminated the other candidates, you didn’t kill them, obviously. Just scared the shit out of them, some even left the estate.

While I'm away, don't read my mail

Just bring a veil

And come visit me in jail

You got the job, of course. And after all that, you can’t back down. You will get what you want. You will have him.

You were in his office, with other employee who were showing you the company.

- This is Y/N sir. She is your new secretary, I sent you a copy of her resume and…

- You can go now, I want to know her better. - He interrupted her.

She looked at you almost saying “good luck” and left.

- I know you, don’t I? Could you remind me where did we met? - He said, his words seemed truthful, but not his eyes… They were daring you to lie.

- You saved me once, but I’m sure you don’t remember that. - It wasn’t exactly a lie.

- Saved you from what? - Fuck. He remembers.

You decided to gaslight him, you wouldn’t destroy what you fought so hard for. You have to make something up.

- Last year… bank robbery, I was one of the people that were held hostage. - You thankfully knew every single one of his operations by head.

He chuckled, looking at you in disbelief.

- You’re a good liar, but my memory is way better. - You tilted your head, trying look confused. - If the police station were the only time we crossed paths, maybe I wouldn’t remember, but the last months you have been quite present, haven’t you?

But please don't call the cops

They'll make me stop

And I just wanna talk

- I don’t know what you’re talking about

He let out a loud laugh, it was dark and scary.

He got up from the chair and circled his tabled. Getting dangerously close to you. You didn’t move a muscle.

He was taller and significantly bigger than you. It was intimidating, but all that you and your sick mind were thinking about was getting pinned under him, held down by those enormous biceps

- It isn’t a coincidence that you always are where I am at, especially when i’m working. I noticed you watching me saving people, every single time. And you always left after me. - He said in a low tone, if he wasn’t so close you wouldn’t hear him.

I'll go back to the diner

I'll write another letter

I hope you'll read it this time, you better

You don’t know that yet, but Bakugo were just as deranged as you are.

When he paid your bail, it was out of heart, but instead of moving on with his life he researched about you, the schools you went, your family, all of your crimes. Things that not even the police knew.

After that, he spotted you on a crowd of people that were watching him arrest a random criminal, more than one time.

Noticed that you didn’t leave even after everyone did, and that you were trying your best to not catch his attention.

You were waiting for something, you were waiting for him.

And after the third time, he noticed you using your quirk, that’s when everything made fucking sense.

All the nights felling watched, the sensation of being followed,

The feminine perfume that just didn’t left his house, his room, his dog, his uniform.

It was you, this whole fucking time.

Bet I could change your life

You could be my wife

He would pretend to be asleep just to hear your steps around his house.

Just to hear you petting his dog and whispering some kind words to it.

Just to feel you coming closer to his sleeping face and stare.

Could get into a fight, I'll say you're right

And you'll kiss me goodnight

- Mr. Dynamight, I just want the job. You’re confusing me with someone else.

In a quick movement he grabbed your wrists and put them behind your back, bending you over his desk, and positioned himself behind you.

You tried to set yourself free, but it was completely useless, you could swear that he would arrest you right there and then.

- You’re fucking insane - He said in your ear.

The cops around the corner stopped me when I tried to leave

They told me I was crazy and they knocked me off my feet

You closed your eyes, accepting your faith. To be honest you didn’t regret a thing, at least he sees you now.

Also, his feelings for you were intense, even if they are anger and hatred, that was enough for you.

But a fucking kiss on your neck and he leaning over you was the last thing you expected.

Your body stiffened, you held your breath.

- What are you doing? - You whispered, shaking.

That’s when you felt his hard dick on your back. What the fuck? Was he excited from all of this? Was he fucking crazy?

They came in through the kitchen lookin' for something discrete

I left a calling card so they would know that it was me

- You’re not the only one who has an obsession.

He didn’t loosen his grip in your wrists, and continued kissing and biting your neck and sometimes the back of your neck, the kisses were wet and aggressive.

- And I am insane? - You weren’t trying to be ironic, you were just astonished.

He didn’t saw it that way, what lead you to receive a hard slap in your ass, and a hair pull right after.

- You don’t get to judge me, bitch. - He said in your ear while holding your hair tightly.

- I wasn’t…- Another slap, you took that as a command to shut up.

He lifted the skirt of your office dress and grabbed the cheek of your ass, that were red from the previous mistreatment.

He slid a finger into your panties and felt your wetness, holding your clit between his fingers while you breathed heavily under him, trying your best to not make noises.

Suddenly, your thong is on your mouth and he’s kneeling to face your wet cunt, he blowed cold air against it, which made you tremble. He held your thighs with enough strength to bruise.

You bended even more, and he licked your folds, sucked your clit, his tongue swirling around your wetness, creating a knot in your low belly.

His mouth is hot and ravishing, almost like he liked the taste.

- Mhm… Dynamight… - You moaned, not being able to complete your sentence.

And with that, you came quickly. The tension and need was too much to handle. Your trembling legs gave in, almost falling, if it weren’t his grip on your thighs.

You couldn’t process your orgasm and he was standing again, his tip teasing you folds, sliding from your entrance to your clit, and going back to your entrance.

You throw your hips back, trying to cause some friction. But you were held in place, and received a hard smack in your ass, and you could swear he used his quirk because of the unusual burn and the loud noise it made

- You’re a big girl, use your words.

- Can you… mhm. Fuck me? Why are you taking so long?

He chuckled, mockingly - I see you’re not so stupid, what a surprise.

Shoving only the tip, he started stretching you out, you’re not a virgin, but there’s way too long since you were fucked, and you didn’t saw his dick, so you weren’t aware of what expected you.

Only the tip already hurt, if it weren’t for how wet you are it probably wouldn’t fit.

It was clear that Katsuki was holding back, each centimeter entering you was driving you closer to madness. Your pussy is sucking him even more.

Bakugo decided to stop torturing you and shoved it entirely into you. It made you scream and the piece of fabric felt from your mouth.

He started pounding into you, not letting you adjust to his entire length, which is huge.

- Put it back in your mouth, if people hear me fucking my secretary it will be worse for your reputation than mine.

You obeyed, not because you cared about what people thought, that was the only reason why you were there anyway. His voice ordering you around made it impossible to not comply.

The table cracking, the friction of your nipples against it. Your pussy burning and throbbing as he fucked you from behind, his grunts and his hand on your hips and ass. Your ass sore from the smacks.

All of that helped another orgasm to grow. One of your hands reached for him, he held your wrist and pulled your other arm, to hold them both as he gripped your hair with his other big hand.

You came with that, held your breath and felt dizzy, almost like you were going to pass out. Your pussy had it’s own heartbeat at this point.

He didn’t slowed his pace, in fact it became more frenetic as you did your best to not keep the oxygen from going to your brain

Suddenly, he pulled out. Turned you around and pulled you into your knees.

- Gonna cum in your mouth, doll.

He stroked sometimes as he stared down at you, face with his usual frown, but his lips were parted and eyes darker.

You opened your mouth in anticipation, he grabbed your face, to keep it like that (but also to caress your cheek while doing it)

As he shoot his loads of seed down your throat some spilled in the conner of your lips, his thumb cleaned your lips and shoved into your tongue.

- Swallow it. - You complied - Good whore.

He stared at you on the floor a bit, you looked away, and that made him grin, obnoxiously.

He lowered to your level, gripping your chin, forcing you to look at him.

Caught you off guard when his lips touched yours, his tongue invaded your mouth, in a dominant yet gentle way. Your whole body shivered.

He broke the kiss and looked at you, without saying a word, he stood up.

- Get up - He circled his desk, you didn’t saw it, but he took your underwear that it was on the desk, and hided it in his pocket.

You got up, fixing your dress and trying to put your hair in place, looking for your underwear, but you were too embarrassed to stay there longer, so you just decided to leave without your panties.

You turned around, ready to leave. Not wanting to face the consequences, or him.

- Did I say you could leave? - You just stopped there, still not facing him

You feel him stepping closer, until he is behind you.

He put your hair to the side, exposing your neck and smelling you there. You got goosebumps all over your body.

I memorized your number, now I call you when I please

I tried to end it all, but now I'm back up on my feet

- When your shift ends, come to my house. You don’t need the address, right? - And kissed your neck. - You may leave now.

I saw you in the car with someone else and couldn't sleep

If somethin' happens to him, you can bet that it was me

–3956

310-807-3956

310-807-3956

[ricflairdrip20]

Rough Case, Soft Served Date (Emily Prentiss x Reader)

Symposis: You and Emily indulged yourselves with some ice cream after a rough case, and silliness ensued.

You and the BAU team spent a week in Deer Lodge, Montana investigating a child abduction case that resulted in the death of 9 children. It was a really difficult case, not only because the two UnSubs who posed as a married couple did an excellent job in concealing themselves and deceiving the community by getting involved in the investigation, but because there’s a number of families that you had to inform about their child’s death.

Your team managed to capture the UnSubs, but not before stealing the life of a nine year old boy, who was abducted just a day prior from the park after being lured to helping them find their lost puppy, which they did with the other victims.

Upon arresting the UnSubs, you and Emily went to inform the mother of the latest victim. After hearing her scream her lungs out, you and your fellow agent sadly walked back to the SUV.

It was a quiet ride back to the station, and you leaned your head on the window. You sighed woefully.

“This has been the longest week of my life,” you mumbled. Emily looked at you, as if agreeing with you. You really understood each other and it was the unspoken interaction that did it.

After relaxing yourself on the plane and drowning yourself in a world of a novel about a lady who relocated to Italy for a new life who somehow found herself testifying as a witness in a murder trial.

“Hey,” your ears shot up at the sudden sound of a familiar voice you always looked forward to hearing.

“What say you and I grab some ice cream when we get back to Quantico?” For the first time in days, a big smile grew on your face.

“Sure.”

You find yourself sitting at an outdoor table with Emily at an ice cream parlor run by a sweet middle aged couple, ordering a bowl of non-dairy ice cream. You two hate dairy. For Emily, she’s lactose intolerant, for you, you simply choose not to consume it due to veganism.

You sighed sadly as you dipped your spoon into your cookie dough flavored sweet.

“Wanna talk about it?” Emily asked. You sighed again.

“This case was god-awful. These families… losing their babies who didn’t even make it to two digits. You’d think after years of doing my job, I’d get used to it. All it taught me is that there’s some really sick people out there. Really sick people. Crazy thing is, someone out there is probably committing a crime right now that requires our attention that nobody knows is happening, except for God.”

“I know, but the best thing about what we do is that we bring closures to the families and the community nationwide.” You nodded. You were so repulsed by the ugliness of this case that you almost forgot that there’s people that really appreciate your dedication to solving the crime.

“Hey,” you looked up from your bowl and before you realized it, Emily booped your nose with ice cream on her fingertip. You laughed at the silliness, forgetting the rough week the BAU had. You can always count on Emily to make your day.

[the-froschamethyst4]

Mr. Vargas

𖤐Pairing: Professor! Alejandro x College girl! Reader

𖤐Pronouns: She/Her

𖤐Warnings: smut, language, age gap (23-40 yr old), blowjob, fingering, P in V, Dom!Alejandro, innocent Y/n, groping, nipple play, eating out, hair pulling, ass slapping, praising and degrading,

𖤐Summary: Professor Alejandro gets his life distracted by one of his students

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3:00PM

Alejandro sat in his office flipping through papers of his students work, but he was looking at one of his students that he has been having a bit of problems with.

“Gah-“

“Hey now…did I say you could stop?” He looks down at this certain student.

“Sorry sir,” Y/n says as her face rested close to his hard dick.

“You scored a 40% on my quiz…have you even been paying attention in my class?”

“I…” she looks down knowing she hasn’t.

“Obviously you haven’t and it shows, you scored the lowest out of everyone,” Alejandro says. He grips her hair tightly behind her head, pulling her and making her make eye contact with him.

“Ah!”

“Hush. We’re going over the ones you miss,” he yanks her up off the floor and bends her over his lap. “If you get it wrong, well, you know what happens,” he says lifting her skirt exposing her ass to him and as a warning he smacks her ass earning a yelp from her.

"A crime with a punishment of 1 year or less in jail is the definition of what word? A. Miranda, B. Arrest, C. Misdemeanor, or D. Felony?" Alejandro asked, gently rubbing her butt getting ready.

"C. M-Misdemeanor."

"Good...but why did you get it wrong if you knew? Did you get it wrong on purpose knowing I might do this to you?" He teased her.

"Next one. When the police trick someone into committing a crime that they would not otherwise commit is the definition of what word? A. Entrapment, B. Curtilage, C. Misdemeanor, or D. Felony?"

"A!" She shouts.

"And yet you got it wrong...you know everything but yet, you purposely got most of them wrong..." He smacks her butt anyways. Earning a loud yelp. "You wanted this...you wanted my attention, you got it, but why lie when you know you could just ask, and I'll give you all the attention you need," his hand went under her chin making her look up at him.

"I want your attention, Mr. Vargas," she moans.

"I know you do," he smacks her ass over and over till seeing red on her ass and a handprint on her right cheek. "And now you get a punishment," he growled.

He pulls her off his lap and stood her up on his desk, he stood between her legs, his hands went to her thighs and he started to kiss her neck, earning a soft moan from her. His hands went under her shirt and pulled it over her head.

"I give you so many opportunities to be a good girl and yet you still disobey me," he smacks her thighs this time earning a whimper.

"I-I'm sorry-"

"No, you're not, if you were you wouldn't have done what you did, you failed just for attention, that's fucking pathetic," he growls at her.

"S-Sir," he smacks her thighs again.

"You don't fucking get to speak," he says.

She bites her bottom lip holding back every word. He smirks and starts going down, he licks his lips and pull her panties down off her lower half and tossing them to the side. His head goes under her skirt licking up her wet slit.

The bottom of her skirt drapes over his head, she collapse on her elbows, her thighs wanted to close around his head but he was holding them open from closing.

She moans as his tongue was licking her up. Y/n then fell on her back, her finger joint her mouth but Alejandro's hand grabbed her wrist pulling her hand away.

"I want to hear your moans," he demands. As he goes back down on her. His hands gripping her thighs pinning them to her chest, he sits up and spits on her clit, he then starts slowly rubbing the spit on her before shoving three fingers inside of her.

Her head goes back hitting against the wood of the desk. She groans from the pain.

He looks at her face seeing her in pleasure, he smirks knowing he could make his girl feel good. Her hand goes to his wrist to keep up his pace as the other fondled with her left tit. She moans then looks at him, she knows he could treat her this good.

He then leans down and starts to lick her nipple, suck on her, and nip at her bud. She moans and holds his other wrist playing with her. She clenches around his three fingers and then he quickly pulls them out.

She whines at him.

"Oh shut up," he says, smacking her thighs. He starts unbuckling his pants and pulled out his hard cock, he rubs his tip against her wet folds teasing her.

He watches her moan and whine. Then he pushes himself inside of her, he thrusts inside of her, immediately rough and hard, she bounces up and down against him moaning and her hands trying to find a place to rest.

Alejandro smirks down at his little play thing, he holds her waist and starts pounding a bit faster and sloppier. Alejandro leans down kissing her neck and then kissing her lips.

His tongue forces its way into her mouth. Her eyes opened slightly, her gaze looked at his eyes that narrowed, they looked dead or bored.

"Flip over, on your stomach," he demands, flipping over and then grabbing her wrist holding her back. Her body off his desk and her feet felt like they were going to slip out from underneath of her.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

"Mr. Vargas, I'm hear to talk about my grade!" A voice was heard on the other side of his office door.

"Not now, Eliza, I'm still talking with my other student, come back in a few minutes!" Alejandro groans like he was annoyed that he was interrupted.

As he fucked Y/n his hand covered Y/n's mouth muffling her moans, but she couldn't help it. As he moves his hands drool drips from from her mouth and his palm.

"You nasty, slut," he smacks her ass earning a yelp from her.

"Ah! AH! AH!" She moans.

"Shut up," he groans.

"S-Sir, I'm-I'm going to cum," she says softly.

"Do it...but I'm not going to stop," he says, smacking her ass.

She grips the wood but of course no grip anywhere. She squeezes her eyes shut and she felt herself come on his dick, but like he said, he wasn't going to stop, he's not fucking done.

"God, you slut, you made a fucking mess," he smirks, gripping her hair and making her look at him form over her shoulder. His lips kissed hers.

"I-I'm sorry," she says.

His hand held her mouth making her quiet and then he starts picking up the pace a bit, skin slapping against each other in his office. He was rough and then he felt himself twitch inside of her and then cum leaks from his tip, he pulls out and watched cum leak from her.

He then sits in his chair, keeping Y/n against his desk, watching cum slowly leak from her. He smirks grabbing tissue and cleaning her up and then leaning forward to taste her cum.

---------

7:00PM

"Up...down...up...down, good girl...there you go...keep going," he was gentle, hands on her waist guiding her.

Y/n moans as she starts moving her hips so gently, grinding on him and smiling when Alejandro kisses between her breasts.

He then starts kissing and sucking on the side of her tit, she moans as her hands went to his hair.

"You're so gentle," she says.

"It's my way of apologizing for being so hard on you," and it's true. Alejandro will get all worked up and then take it all out on Y/n, then afterwards he starts being gentle and sweet with her, treating her and what she likes.

Alejandro and Y/n agreed to this type of thing when Y/n was a freshman in his class, and they made a deal that they both could help each other with their sexual needs and wants. Y/n is single and Alejandro was divorce from his ex-wife and no kids.

"Come on, amor...I want you to cum," he says with a smile.

"I'm trying," she says, moving a bit faster but his hands held her waist to keep her slow pace.

"No, no, slow, amor, slow," he says.

She just nods listening to him. She was slow, and gentle, she felt herself close again, she looks at Alejandro and then let's out a soft moan before coming, he smiles and comes as well.

"There we go," he placed his left hand on the back of her head and the other on her lower back. He gently rests her on his desk, he was above her. "We'll go one more time...I know you're tired, mi amor," he coos next to her ear as he moves slowly, her arms wrapped around his neck, her moans echoing in his ears.