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[schizomatic3000]

my college essay <3

There’s always a debate about what really makes someone a woman; I believe it’s fear. The specific type of fear only women can have when they know that this interaction could end in an assault. It’s like when you get your blood pressure checked, they place the band around your arm and it starts squeezing. Only the band is put around your legs, neck, and heart; you can’t run away, you can’t scream for help, you’re about to become a statistic. The worst part is that most men barely realize when it happens. They’ll see a girl talking with their friend across the room and silently cheer him on, completely ignoring her darting eyes searching for help or her side steps to prevent him from cornering her. To be a woman is to always know you’re in danger.

One of my favorite musical artists is a band called Badflower. One of the main reasons I love them so much is because all four members are not afraid to talk about important social issues. In fact, their newest album, “This Is How The World Ends”, is all about social issues ranging from patriotism to the effect the pandemic had on politics. The eleventh track, "Tethered", keeps in line by following a young girl who ends up being drugged and raped at a party by a much older man; subsequently leading her to marry him and stay in the abusive relationship. Once the emphasis on her naivety is made, the following lines play in the third verse: "Then speech becomes a slur, She’s talking to some creep, Uncomfortable as hell, But too polite to leave" You can tell by the last line alone that it was a man who wrote this song; any woman would have said "scared" instead. 

The fact that men can write an entire song about this issue and still completely misunderstand it demonstrates how uniquely feminine this experience is; men will never understand our fear, pain, or solemn understanding of our place in the world. Every woman has, at least once, dealt with a creepy guy whether he was following her in the store, staring at her on the beach, or outright catcalling every girl has a story. Yet if you ask a man about his experiences with sexual assault, chances are he won’t have any. This isn’t to discredit male survivors but to highlight the disproportionate gap between sexes. Most men won’t even think twice about walking to their car after work but women are always told to go in pairs "in case anything happens".

When men are talking to a creepy guy, he doesn’t want to end the conversation out of fear of being seen as rude. If he abruptly ends the conversation and moves on to do something else, the other person might be offended and not talk to him again. But when women are talking to a creepy guy, she doesn’t want to end the conversation out of fear. If she abruptly ends the conversation and moves on to do something else, the other person might be offended and follow her to the bathroom to get her alone. Growing up young girls are constantly taught how to protect themselves, not to walk alone at night, never leave your drink unattended, and always share your location when on the first date. It is never presented to you as an "if this happens to you" scenario, but rather as a "when it happens" scenario.

Sexual assault is always on women’s minds as it is the only thing we all have in common; the fear of it happening to us. Men can never and will never be able to experience that level of systematic terror. When women are feminists, it's because they will literally die without it. When men are feminists, chances are they just want girls to think they're hot. Even if they truly do want a change in how women are treated, they can't even begin to understand what it means to be in that position. The feminine experience of fear is what defines me as a woman, but it will never define me as a person.

[professoredu]

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STICK TO A PARTICULAR TOPIC

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[professoredu]

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