#colin fantasy life

[mmovemmountains]

Seeing Colin in the new Fantasy Life trailer revived me,,, I am a new person,,,, I can wait years.... Centuries... for the next game,,,, He's so BEAUTIFUL my SON *incoherent crying*

[flame-in-heart]

Watching all the Polin edits and I just wanted to say: Marina, you will always be famous.

[dollypopup]

so many people out here mad af that Colin isn't in love w/ Penelope from jump and completely ignoring that the single sexiest thing a man can do is be friends w/ a woman wholeheartedly and without having any romantic or sexual expectation from her

[plumeriacosmos]

kinda wanna see a polin au based on korean romfan webtoons where the everything goes to shit, and penelope gets executed by the queen, she regresses through time (at her death) and goes through her life all over again, but she vowes to do things “correctly” this time (which is probably like try not to fall in love with colin and maybe pull away from the bridgertons in general)

what she doesnt know tho, is that colin also regressed through time. And he also wants to do things right with pen this time around.

tl:dr: penelope knows what will happen, colin knows the future, too. they have different goals. Pen tries to run from colin, colin will chase after her

[thehiddenbaroness]

Enchanted World: The Book of Beginnings Time-Life Books (Eds.), 1984, USA Artists (top to bottom, left to right): Ataentsic, Iroquois legend -- Colin Stimpson Robin -- Colin Stimpson The Chinese goddess Nu Kua -- David Bergen Lindu, Estonian legend -- David Bergen Typhon imprisoned in Mount Etna -- Wayne Anderson Sun and moon twins of Korean myth -- Johnny Pau (2) Chapter pages -- Tom Adams (2)

[draconic-distress]

What’s up fuckers Fantasy Life Online is ending so I wrote a thing. It’s not done yet but at least I know where it’s going so hopefully it’ll be all done by tomorrow since that’s the last day. Anyways enjoy :)

[girllookingoutwindow]

People comes and goes. Colin eyes are dancing in the room following her. She is too far away. He wanted to reach her, but she's in the center and he's in the corner. This is her night. So he waits, giving her the moment.

His eyes call for her. Their find each other. She looks at him and his body has his own will and gets closer to her. Where he belongs. He can't stop looking to her.

She is so beautiful that he can't believe that she's real. The night feels like a fantasy tale. She's a butterfly, ehereal and dreamy.

They were so many things in his mind. So many things he wants to say. He's so impressed, so proud of her. Of what she'd done. She's free now. He feels free too. Like some heavy weight has left his body.

it's something different on her, a calming force, a strength in her voice. But it's kind of nature. The softness of it all makes him feel soft too.

She speaks and he can't comprehend the words that came from her mouth. He heard them and they feel they come from the depths of the void. From a different world. A different life. A life he couldn't be more afraid. A life without her.

The strings in his heart that connects to hers press him deeply. His breath hurts. It's water in his eyes. Just one tear could fill an ocean.

She's his family. She always was. It's not home without her.

She's letting him go. He recognises the feeling. He tried to do the same for her before. But it felt wrong. It feels so wrong. He can't let go. He doesn't want to let go of the feeling that her presence makes in his soul.

What he would be, more than the shadows of a man?

She talks about forgiveness. He knows he hurt her. He's not proud of it. They hurt each other. More than they thought they were able to do so or even want it. He was so full of resentment and distrust. But he needed to feel it. To embraced completely to let it go.

He missed her. Even when she was in the same room. He wanted to touch her, to kiss her. He was too proud to let her know.

He can't never be able to be far away from her. She needs to know.

A piece of her heart was in her letters. But her mind was all there too. They were full of her kindness and curiosity. They were so cleaver and full of her humor. She was her real self there. He had the privilege of knowing her like nobody else. He loved her all along.

He needed her. The way they made him feel alive and close to home. He was so lost without his letters.

She made him come back. Her voice always calls him like a siren's song.

He loves Pen, but he loved Whistledown without him knowing all along. He loves both of them. It's the woman he chose to marry, who's in front of him. He doesn't imagine not being her. He doesn't want to. She's the most brave woman he knows.

He was so jealous. Jealous of her success. She made her dreams come true before he knew his. He was jealous of her writing and having to share her with it. He felt so little around her.

She could have the entire world if she wanted to. Why she would chose him? Why she would love him? He never could find a reason. He didn't have anything to give. He wanted to be so worthy of her love.

He can't imagine let that warm feeling go.

He didn't have to find one. What reason has to do with love? Maybe he was just the luckiest man int he world. To love such woman and she loving him back. Lucky that the destiny made her know her. To find each other.

He would do of his love his reason. His purpose. Nothing else, nothing more. He doesn't want nothing more.

He wants his wife. He needs to say it to her. Every day. In every moment he can. He missed her so much.

He wants to makes her smile every day. But he want to be there when she cries, and she's angry with him. When they fight for the most silly things. He wants to be there with her. And dance with her, together, the rest of their lives.

[weirdmorefics]

bridgerton sister ran away just before the beginning of her season and discovered by Colin in St Petersburg under a fake identity and bought back home

The Familiar Barmaid

x bridgerton!sister

Pronouns- She/her

Warning- Mother issues

Word Count- 933

Summary- The reader wants to be an author, but unfortunately, she has a season to get back to.

Y/n Bridgerton had never dreamed of being married like her other sisters (Eloise excluded). Y/n loved reading, she imagined her own stories and stashed her written stories under her bed. She craved to be an author like the ones who made the books she admired. Her mother however had other plans for her since day one; come out, become the diamond of the season, and be courted by a handsome gentleman I loved who hopefully had an amazing title. I never craved that life I much preferred to live in the fantasy worlds I created in my head. This leads us to my escape from the Bridgerton household the night before my season.

I had packed the most important things to me; my writings, my favorite books, and the leftover money I had been saving from my gown fittings. I quietly took my horse out of the stable at night and rode the horse to a place no one would know Y/n Bridgerton.

I rode my horse for as far as she could go taking breaks in dingy inns that my Mother wouldn't dare to step foot in. By the time I was in St Petersburg, I was already short on funds. It was a better place to settle than most it had gorgeous views and so many new things to write about. As luck would have it the bar in town was looking for a barmaid. Unfortunately, the bar owner could tell very easily that I had no experience. Shockingly he gave me a chance! He said I reminded him of his daughter who recently married so her room above the bar was also available. It felt like fate like I had been sucked into my very own fantasy book.

I spent my days writing in the nearby park and the nights dealing with town drunks. Honestly, they weren't too bad just demanding their drinks. I learned quickly and I became their favorite barmaid only because I made the drinks the fastest but it still made me feel accomplished. It was a bittersweet feeling to have the town drunks appreciate me more than my mother but at least I was appreciated.

I felt true relief once the season was over no longer worried they would find me and make me a last-minute entry. The bar was just closing and I was washing the grimy tables when the chime of the door startled me. The man was bundled his scarf nearly covering his whole face.

I turned to him and frowned politely "I am so sorry sir we are just closing."

The man gasps once he hears me speak "Y/N?"

I quickly back up accidentally sending a chair to the ground with a loud thud, "I think you have the wrong woman sir."

My boss exits the backroom at the commotion, "This fella bothering you Rose?"

"Are you serious Y/n? Rose? Be a little more original," the man unwraps his scarf and my fists immediately tighten.

"Colin, what are you doing here?" I practically growl.

"You know this man Rose? Seems a little too uptight for you, but I am not here to judge your taste in suitors." My boss chuckles finding his comment hilarious.

Colin gags, "That is my little sister I'll have you know! And I am bringing you right home Mother has been worried sick about you!"

I roll my eyes "She probably did not even know about my absence until Lady Whistledown announced it. How did she cover it up? Am I in the States visiting my cousins?"Colin's face turns beat red which tells me I am right.

Colin tries to change the subject, "Your sisters miss you dearly, Daphne was devasted you were not there for her wedding."

I gasped, "Daphne is already married! The season just ended!"

Colin rubbed his arm, "There were a lot of issues with this season Y/n… honestly we all could have used some of that Y/n wisdom. I especially could have used some of that wisdom." He mumbled the last part seeming very embarrassed to admit it.

"Oh, Colin… I am so sorry. I miss my siblings all dearly but I am not meant for the home carer life. I am meant to be out there writing about anything I can get my hands on." I gesture to the world around me.

"That is one good thing about your departure, no one thinks you are Lady WhistleDown anymore," He smirks.

"Oh what a pity I did like causing fear and scaring the men off with the promise to write about them," I smile.

Colin sighs, "I will make you a deal Y/n, travel with me during my studies. You can explore the world that way, but you must write to Mother and the rest of your siblings and let them know you are safe."

"You know she or Anthony will just drag me back home," I frown.

"Not with me by your side, I am sure I can convince Anthony and she can convince Mama." He smiles as the plan begins to form in his head.

I smiley widely, "You have yourself a deal Colin Bridgerton."

He smiles back as my boss lets out a few stray tears, "You truly are just like my daughter, just as stubborn and hot-headed. Be sure to visit your welcome back anytime."

I gave him a side hug, "Oh boss you big old softie."

Colin laughs, "Y/n you are truly something."

"Why thank you," I take a bow. "Shall we take our leave?"

"We shall," Colin smiles.

[nitw]

the whole sigcorp franchise is about grief -- life, death, grief, and moving on. but i really appreciate how each game handles the topic differently and paints a new perspective of it via the characters in focus:

in to the moon, johnny struggles to cope with a loss and a sense of guilt he can't rationalize. the game asks if it's fair for johnny to be happy if his happiness outweighs the real memories and consequences of the life he lived... but ultimately, it's not up for the doctors (or us) to decide -- johnny's love for river was real, and that mattered to him more than anything else deep down. nothing could change that fact, and he subconsciously held onto it, even as the fabric of reality broke down around him.

in finding paradise, colin struggles to accept his own life coming to an end despite having little to no regrets, and uses fantasy as an excuse to justify his dissatisfaction. the game asks if there's any clear difference between "real" memories and "the fiction we tell ourselves"... but when so much of our lives is fueled by a natural fear of death and loneliness, the distinction barely matters. every moment can be meaningful if you just want it to be, even if it's in retrospect. even the little things.

in impostor factory, lynri struggles with seeing worth in her own life, yet simultaneously does everything she can to leave a lasting mark on the world -- while quincy struggles to be her anchor, as he becomes increasingly aware that they can't live a normal life together. the game asks if lynri has the right to be selfish and pursue her goals at the expense of any chance at happiness with quincy, or if quincy has the right to be selfish and keep lynri grounded if that just seals her fate... but there's no correct answer to that. life is too complicated for there to be a singular, perfect thread of choices. sometimes pain is unavoidable, so all you can do is make the most of what you have while it still lasts.

and every time, these dilemmas are directly mirrored through eva and neil. it always circles back to the hypocritical nature of what sigcorp does, to eva putting on a strong face and trying to see these issues in black and white to protect herself, to neil genuinely believing in the value of his work but failing to take his own advice.

i think the beach episode was the perfect conclusion to all of this. we don't know how eva's gonna carry on now... but we have to imagine that she is. we have to hold onto that hope, for her sake and for our own. we, the audience, have to accept this as the end of the series, and believe that the moment we press the escape key, eva accepts it as well.

these fictional people's lives meant something to us. and if there was hope for them, there's hope for us, too.

[moirindeclermont]

Following yesterday's post, on today's episode of ,"all the Polin first times we didn't see in BridgertonS3" it's the first time Colin touches himself in front of Pen.

It can be a direct follow up to yesterday's scene.

They invert their position, so Colin is front of the mirror and Pen can watch the full show. He also tells her about the first time he was touching himself thinking of her.

"it was after our first kiss" and he goes to touch his lips "I don't know how late I fell asleep because I continued to play that kiss in my mind. I was hard just thinking about it, which had never happened before. But I tried to abstain because you were clear we were friends - or so I thought" and Pen is watching him intensely.

"I dreamt of you that night for the first time and in my dream, our kiss didn't stop" and he goes down on his body, pinching hard his nipples before heading to his peen, standby proudly in front of them.

"I was kissing your neck and your breasts when I woke up, and my hand find her way under my cover" and he is using the same hand now, moving slowly, doing some movement with his wrist that Pen wants to learn. He use the liquid at the tip to make the movements easier while he moans. Colin talks a lot about her sounds, but his are te most sexy thing Pen has ever heard.

"and I started touching myself like now, thinking of you and your lips. Your breasts touching me" he is speeding up, getting lost in the moment just as she was moments before.

"and then my fantasy got dirtier, because next thing I was imagining you bouncing on top of me, taking your pleasure. Needless to say I came so fast that time I was actually a hit embarrassed with myself" he confess as he continues to touch himself, the other hand going around his body.

"and after the carriage, sometimes I would touch my hair like you did. It's not the same, but I always imagine you doing it" as he proceeds to repeat the movement, while he is getting close. He leans on Pen's chest, felling how hard her nipples are and how affected she is "and after being inside you, all I have to do to come is imagine that" as he scrunch his face in his classic expression when he release.

He collapses in pen's arm and they share a intimate, deep kiss. He feels Pen caressing his chest, making him shiver and then she surprises him by saying in his ear "now husband, I'm wet again... Would you like to do something about it?" And Colin would never refuse such an offer.

I accept request! Send me your most unconfessed Polin fantasy and I should bring it to life for you.

[mmovemmountains]

Maybe if I draw cute Fantasy Life boys enough the new switch game will come out faster...

[dollypopup]

We all need to take more time to appreciate Colin Bridgerton and the details of his sexy dream. In his brain, the ultimate fantasy involves

him walking to Penelope in a new (fully imagined) dress/nightgown as he is cravatless, shirt undone, in her garden in the mist

an APOLOGY to her for how late it is, and that he just HAD to see her (Colin Bridgerton out here putting the man in manners)

STUTTERING through a confession of how much he's been thinking of her ("I rehearsed that speech for hours")

The mist dissipating and turning into flames around them like candlelight (he's a WRITER!!!!!! the metaphors. the VIBES)

Her reply that she ALSO can't stop thinking of him or their kiss (consent KING)

The two of them passionately smooching as he presses her against a wall (they like it rough)

Cushioning the back of her head with his hand as she grabs onto his arm for dear life (but also tender)

Very loud moaning from her as he kisses over her neck and chest (praise kink! praise kink! praise kink!)

and then my man woke up in a SWEAT. chest HEAVING. cheeks RED. from one of the most romantic PG-13 wet dreams possible. this is the guy who was having threesomes like half an episode ago and now he's blushy blushy over the idea of Pen having feelings for him and them smoochin' about it. and you wanna tell me he's NOT the best Bridgerton Boy??? puhlease!!! 11/10, ultimate fave, sign him up for an AO3 account posthaste

[lookingfts]

Friday Fic Rec 10/18

Thanks as always for your submissions! Titles are links to each fic.

All’s Well That Ends Well (To End Up With You) and Help Me Hold On To You by aRegularJo

“Amazing modern AU that manages to include all of the Bridgerton family in a story that rings very true to Anthony and Kate.”

Description: Anthony Bridgerton does *not* want to marry Kate Sharma. And Kate Sharma definitely doesn’t have time to date Anthony Bridgerton. But a friends-with-benefits contract? That’s rational; in fact, it’s really just good sense. Things escalate quickly.

Complete - T - 190k words

Indulgence by @helenakwayne

“Kate has a hot fantasy life, and when she dares Anthony to join in, the result is everything you could expect.”

Description: During a late night at work, a rather impatient Kathani Sharma considers how to make a move on Anthony Bridgerton… or better yet, how to get Anthony to make a move on her. (Modern AU)

Complete - E - 16k words

The Way to a Man's Heart by wetheresponsible

“Anthony loving EVERYTHING about Kate, including the new world of culinary delights she brings.”

Description: Anthony Bridgerton has a secret. His family sets out to uncover it.

(Well. Benedict and Colin do, at least.)

Complete - E - 10k words

take my hand, wreck my plans, that's my man (series) by @folklauerate

“I don't know what else to say about this series. Anthony and Kate are college professors and their relationship is as precious as it is filthy. *Chef's kiss*”

Description: It becomes a thing. “My treat, kitten,” He says, sliding into the booth at Turtle Bay, and sliding her a gin and tonic. Perhaps it’s wrong. Perhaps she shouldn’t like it. Perhaps she should figure out some sort of boundary, some sort of something. But she doesn’t. She likes it. (an age-gap au but they're both professors so is it really that bad)

Complete - E - 37k words

till the day i meet my maker by cyclothimic

Description: Anthony occupies a small position in the government, and Kate makes doing his job so much harder.

Complete - T - 8k words

LFTS rec: Sidelines by ramarro

This is one of those fics where I’m like oh, you haven’t read it? Read it right now. It’s an absolute Kanthony classic. A masterclass in buildup and sexual tension that I don’t think I’ll ever have the patience to accomplish. 😂

Description: Kate sees Anthony's bumble profile and finds it very pretentious. It does not stop her from obsessively drawing his arms though. Until he starts dating her sister.

Complete - E - 63k words

Thanks to those who submitted! This is a (mostly) weekly thing, so keep your recs coming! You can find previous weeks under the "lfts fic recs" tag.

[cathreaux]

So, I'm assuming, after weeks of pretending that is all casual, that I'm in the polin fever too. I mean, the way I'm OBSESSED with them that I even started to write fanfics again after yeeears AND also posting, sharing and comment a lot (like, I'm more like a quiet fan, but this time I can't) but the way I'm going onto some headcanons about the show... Oh, sweet fanfic-child, remember their not canon.

But, as a wise yearning man on tears said, "I cAn'T" and now I can't stop thinking about what if Pen was Colin's childhood crush?

✨imagine with me for a moment✨

As we know —I think? We know? I think we know this or maybe I'm spend too much time here— from the beginning Colin been found Pen charming, intelligent, funny, brave, pretty, interesting, sensible, lovely and a long list of qualities that Colin "my wife" Bridgerton would love to tell you. And for him is so normal, like, "of course I think she's amazing, have you seen her?" that the idea of him being ashamed of her was ridiculous. And he let her know that so many times during the season, even before the kiss. Her silence was tortured him when he was in his tour and, even if he wasn't conscious, part of all the changes he did were thinking if that would bring her attention back.

Ok, with that on mind, what if when they know each other he has a crush on her? In the show they meet when they were kids, and she make an unforgettable first impression that even after years he remembered with a big soft smile. But ALSO he REMEMBER when the Featheringtons moved to their house (he see her BEFORE they meet in the incident with the horse). He was mesmerized, so charmed by her and trying to cause a good impression (his reaction after fall of the horse said a lot), but the fact that she start a friendship with Eloise and he keep seeing her, also influenced on what I think was the big Colin's travel of childhood'crush/myverygoodfriend/ohshitIwasinloveallthisfuckingtime.

Because, first of all, if Pen and Eloise hadn't become friends they would never have had the opportunity to seen each other so much and less yet to know themselves as they did. Society rules wouldn't let them. They were children but even in that moment of their lifes a friendship between girls and boys wasn't good looking for others. But Pen and El becoming friends (I'm sure that would happen with or without Colin) and that created so many moments for them. For develop the proximity, the puns, the games, the conversations, to sharing interest, the fact that they think the other is pretty but doesn't know if he/she think the same, the chemistry. They have enough space and time for nervous giggles and show a discrete interest that they can hide as a friendship' start, but not enough space and time alone for profound theirs feelings and show/seen more of how the other feels.

If Pen had not become friend with Eloise, they would be only neighbors and he would be interested, but more like a distance fantasy that something more real and deep, more easy to let it go (and maybe it would return when she debuts). But being friend with her changes everything. His interest for her was bigger and bigger, but, how he can keep her in his life without pushing her away? He had to let his crush and feelings stay in the shadows of his childhood, where every infant love is supposed to remain.

If Eloise wouldn't been always present or interrupting their interactions they're would also deep their relationship (no encontré cual es la palabra correcta para lazos porque la que me salió no es la que estaba buscando), maybe would notice (both of them) that it wasn't only friendship for the other... But the thing is Bridgertons doesn't know how to share (that's included friends) and, for the way the ton work in their context, he can't claim her as his (in any way) at the same way that Eloise do. Even call her his friend was go against the status quo, any other claim being so young would only distance them for the society rules. In fact, his family give them so much freedom that they wouldn't have with any other that wasn't a Bridgerton. But the rules are still there. So, he have to choose. And childhood crush only remains in the past, right? He want her in his life permanent, so a very good friend has to be.

Another point is, yes, he was more closed to his sister's ages and with them in general, but Pen was the girl he meet by himself, the person outside his family with who have most proximity. And he finds her charming from the beginning. And he was always so romantic, he probably loved to play the prince, the knight or the savior pirate when he played with Pen and his sisters. He's always trying to prove to others that he is enough, trying to been seen in a good way, in forms that he would like to be perceived or at least what he think other people want or expect.

And she see him. She listen him. She talks to him. She doesn't think that his dreams, fears, hopes and doubts are dumb. She validates his feelings, always do. She see the real Colin. But as a friend.

That is what he thinks.

Also, as I said before, friendship between girls and boys wasn't allowed to be. Having Pen on his life, having a girl-friend in his life wasn't something normal, he don't have references for how is supposed to be or feel.

And then is all the El's opinion about the ton, the marriage market and Pen always seems like she support all her opinions. As far as Colin or any Bridgerton knew (except for Violet), Pen felt the same way. When Penelope debuted, he doesn't believed she would be interested in marriage. Yes, he understand that she doesn't feel comfortable for so many reasons (her mama, Cressida, society in general) but he also believes that she don't have any interest of being part of that (and we know that wasn't her perspective). So, he keep the "she is a very good friend" discourse. Because she doesn't want him, as she never did (for his perspective) but she doesn't want a husband or prospects in general, so that's okay. She will keep being his friend and he's still the more important man in her life outside her family.

And then we have aaaaaall that he heard for his entire life. How is supposed to feel love, desire, passion and interest in the adulthood. The way how he would feel instantly after he seen the other person and would be mutual, the fact that any other man never talk about the tenderness, the laught or the softness he always feel with Pen.

And after Marina, after all the jokes about him being green, his doubts about his place in society, the silence with he had to deal in his travel after the Featherington's Ball, and his thoughts that that is what he need to be, even if is not himself... He changes. Only for discover when he return that everything changed.

He want Pen back, he apologized after knew what he did, but then he discovered that Pen want prospects. Pen want to marry someone else. Pen is open to the idea of having a partner. Someone that is not him.

Never wasn't him, right? But he offered his help, because he want her back, he wants to spend time with her in any way he can, and yeah, she wants marry. Is fine, is perfectly fine. They're friends. As always. Is okay she's gonna give to other man the privilege to be her most important man on her life. Cool. Is not breaking him at all...

But only for the work... what is she looking for in a husband? What's she want? Why can't be him?

And after the kiss... Well :)

I think that (and I known myself, I probably gonna talk about the scenes between them having this headcanon on mind) would suite a lot with all his journey in his story with Pen 🖤 thanks for coming to my Tumblr talk 😘

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Crushed 17

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, manipulation, cheating, sleazy behaviour, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Your next door neighbours hook up, bringing to surface deep-seated feelings.

Characters: Colin Shea, Jonathan Pine

Note: I just get this urge!

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you like my dog loves belly rubs (that’s a lot). Take care. 💖

The best night of your life passes in a haze of vibrant afterglow, intermingled with spurts of fiery passion. For as much as you can’t get enough of Jonathan, he can’t get enough of you. You forget about the world; about fatigue and responsibilities. There is only each other, only that desperate need to touch, kiss, and moan.

When at last you surrender to exhaustion, your dreams are tinged with visions of reality. Hard muscle, soft lips, and tender whispers. You sway on a tide of pleasured delirium until finally, the wave crests. You sink back down the waking world, your eyes fluttering as morning light stains the wall yellow.

You could swoon. You can’t believe it’s real. After the weeks of tension, fear, and stress, last night feels like no less than a fantasy. You slowly roll onto your back and reach blindly, daintily touching the figure beside you. Nope, he’s very real.

You look at Jonathan, his tall finger stretched across the mattress. One leg bent, one arm tucked under the pillow. His chest rises and follows in a rhythmic breath. His bare chest. The chest you just couldn’t stop grabbing and clawing as he… did wonderful things.

His cheek dimples as he smirks without opening his eyes, “do I have bedhead?”

“What?” You squeak, caught in your admiration. “Uh, no.”

He gives a rocky chuckle and turns onto his side. He hooks his arm around you and wiggles closer before you can fall onto your back. You gasp and brace his arm, letting your thumb rub the bulging muscles of his bicep.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

“N-nothing,” you sputter.

He searches you with his blue-green eyes and a furrow pinches between his brows, “are you certain?” His blond lashes flick, “you don’t regret… last night?”

“No, no! Never,” you plead with him, letting your hand trail up to your shoulder, cheeks blooming with heat as you swallow a giddy squeal, “promise, I don’t. I couldn’t.”

He grins even bigger, “oh, I know, I just wanted to hear you say it,” he leans in and nuzzles his nose against yours.

“You… know? How?” You murmur, suffocated by his proximity.

“The noise you made, darling,” he growls and tilts his head to kiss you, long and hungry, pulling away with a nibble of your lower lip, “like a symphony.”

“Oh,” you utter bashfully.

“Might I hear them again?” He brushes his fingers down your side.

“I…”

“You won’t have to do a thing, darling,” he eases you onto your back as he kisses your lips again. 

He makes a path along your cheek and jaw, down to your throat as you gasp again. You clutch the loose bedsheet as your spine arches. His doting progress traces along your chest and stomach as he gently parts your legs. He kneels between them, lifting his head to look at you as he kisses the inside of your thigh, inspiring a quiver.

“You only have to sing for me, fawn,” he breathes as he edges closer to your vee, “mmm, darling…”

His nuzzles your cunt and his tongue glides between your folds. You moan and dig your nails into the mattress. Your toes curl and your muscles coil. The knot of pleasure begins to tangle again, longing for him to untie it. You close your eyes and let your head loll, succumbing to his diligent tending.

🌼

After another romp, or several, you give in to the day and beg Jonathan to let you out of bed. He does, reluctantly, as the same reticence slows your steps. You rinse off in the bathroom, surpassing a shower for the time in favour of coffee. He whisks past you as you emerge, a lingering touching on your hips as he does.

You go to the kitchen and rinse out the carafe to start a pot. You pause as you place it on the burner. Would he rather tea? You should’ve asked.

He surprises you as he appears, dressed, his hair slightly damp as he combs his fingers through it. His shirt is slightly wrinkled and there’s an ugly crease in his slacks. He’s unbothered by his uncharacteristic disarray.

“Ah, you just relax,” he comes to you and takes the empty carafe, setting it in the machine. “I will go down to the cafe and fetch us breakfast,” he kisses your head before he pulls away, checking his watch, “they’ve a lavender latte I’ve heard rave reviews about. Would you like to try it?”

“Oh, you don’t need to do all that. I have eggs in the fridge–”

“Ah ah,” he waves his hand, “I won’t hear of it.”

“Really, I–”

“Darling, I must warn you, I don’t think you quite know what you’ve signed up for,” he winks, “I won’t let you trouble over me. I’m not that type. Let me take care of you. You deserve that after all that’s transpired.”

“Jonathan,” you say.

“Mmm, say it again,” he drawls as he cups your chin.

“Jonathan,” you repeat more firmly. “That cafe is expensive–”

“Don’t worry for it,” he shakes his head and lays another kiss on your head, “stay and relax. You had a long night.”

Your brows pop up at his insinuation. For someone who always came across so proper, he can be coy. You shrug and relent.

“Fine,” you agree, “thanks, and er, yeah, I suppose I could try the lavender.”

“Wonderful,” he grins before his demeanour greys and he brings a long finger up, “lock the door.”

“I will,” you avow, the stone plummeting back into the depths of your heart. Oh yeah.

“And call me should you need me,” he demands. You nod as you chew your lip.

You follow him to the door, in only a long tee with Tigger on the front, and find your keys. You hand them over and he steals another kiss before he goes. You are quick to turn the latch, watching through the peephole as he lingers for a moment, eyeing the door with distaste.

He leaves at last and you back away. Somehow you forgot about it all. The carving on your door, your suspension, and lunch with your mother. The afterglow evaporates entirely as you come back down to earth.

You grab your phone and check your notifications. There’s a missed call from your mother and another from your sister. You pace around the front room as you ponder what to do. You return to the bedroom and look at the twisted sheets and the blanket hanging half off the side.

You put your phone down and tidy up the bed. You pull the mattress sheet taut and shake out the pillows. You spread the top sheet and replace the duvet on top. You twiddle your fingers restless and spin to sit on the edge. Your phone lights up suddenly, buzzing on the night table.

You swipe it up and answer, your sister’s name glancing across the screen before you bring it to your ear.

“Hey,” you eke out.

“So,” Geri begins in her way, “I guess that means you want a plus one.”

“What?” You sputter.

“I figured you’d be coming alone so I didn’t factor in the extra plate. So, plus one?” She continues as if you hadn’t said a word.

“What do you–”

“Mom told me about your boyfriend,” she nearly scoffs, “she said he’s charming. Of all things. Just make sure he wears a tie, okay?”

“Ger, I– if it’s a big deal–”

“No, it’s not,” she dismisses, “besides, I don’t need you moping on my special day, the way you do. It’s about time you found someone.”

“Wow, thanks.”

“And your bridesmaid’s dress. Champagne is the colour scheme. Satin preferably. I’ll send a pic of what the other girls got,” she bowls you over again. She is, of your sisters, the most like your mother. “No flats, okay? This isn’t a ballet.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Don’t do that,” she sneers, “and you’ll be at the rehearsal dinner. You’ll need a dress for that too…”

She begins to rant. As you try to keep up, you frown. You hope you’re never a bride, it seems like a lot of work. If you did get married, you’d be just fine signing the paper at the courthouse. You chew your thumb and nod dumbly along.

“Are you listening?” She snaps curtly.

“Yeah, just making notes,” you lie.

“Mom was saying she never hears from you. None of us do…”

Again you drift away. Like the lunch with your mother, you’re just a punching bag for all their gripes. Somehow, even your younger sisters make their problems yours. You pick at the hem of your shirt and muddle through the shopping list of Geri’s complaints.

A thump makes you flinch. You can’t help but squeak as you glance over at the wall. You squint. What was that? It comes again. Your focus completely cracks.

“Geri,” you interrupt, “I’ll have to call you back.”

“What? I’ll be at work.”

“Then call me when you’re not. I gotta go.”

You hang up as the thumping continues. The tempo slowly builds and there’s a creaking interwoven with the heavy bumps. Then voices come, permeating the adjoined wall. The very one you share with Ally. You cover your mouth in shock.

Her shrill cries intermix with the banging, what you can only assume is the bed frame. It’s nothing you haven’t heard before but much more intense. It’s usually subtle enough to drown out. And another voice, deeper. Both so loud it can only be deliberate.

You grip your phone tight and stumble out of the room. You shut the door, blocking out the cacophony. It can’t be an accident. You know that much.

You go back to the living room and tuck yourself into the corner of the couch. You stare at your phone but do nothing. You’re too shaken to even scroll through Insta.

You shouldn’t feel this way. Your chest shouldn’t hurt. Not because of him. You have Jonathan now so why does the idea of Colin being with her still feel so bad? You’re horrible.

You drop your phone on the cushion and turn your face down, hiding in your hands as you sniffle. Jonathan’s gone to get you breakfast and you’re here about to cry over another man. You are rotten and stupid and weak.

The lock grinds loudly and the door opens. You snap your head up and listen as Jonathan enters. The door closes and you hear him shuffling before he appears. You try to smile but your cheeks only twitch. You get up to take the tray of drinks from him.

“Here, let me help,” you say sheepishly.

You turn and set down the cardboard tray, the aroma of lavender wafting up to tickle your nose. You’re shaking. Jonathan comes up behind you and places the paper bag next to the cups, pressing himself to your back. He kisses your crown as he hugs.

“Darling, what’s the matter?”

“Nothing,” you croak.

“You’re a very poor liar,” he girds, “and I’m not fond of dishonesty.”

“Sorry, I… my sister called,” you sniff, not quite a lie, “she wants me to get a dress. Two, actually, and…” You carefully detach from him and cross your arms, striding across the living room, “and there’s an engagement party and my mother told her about you–”

“Is that a bad thing?” He wonders as he opens the paper bag.

“No, I didn’t mean that,” you insist, “it’s only… a lot.”

“Surely, you planned on attending your sister’s wedding,” he intones, “and now you won’t have to do so alone. Are you not happy?”

“Of course, I guess… I’m nervous,” you try to shake off the grayness. You near him again as he holds out a cardboard container.

“It’s what they call a breakfast bowl. I wasn’t sure if you liked avocado so I had them put it on the side.”

“Oh, thank you, that’s very… thoughtful,” you make yourself smile, even though it hurts.

You go to the small table set against the wall between two chairs and place your breakfast there. You sit as he follows, setting down a tall cup beside the container. You thank him again. You peel off the lid and look at the foam, the pattern in it not the typical brown but a shade of lilac.

“Looks so good,” you murmur.

“It does,” he puts his own food on the other end of the table but doesn’t sit. “Eat, eat.” He commands with a flick of his fingers.

“Uh, okay, aren’t you gonna–”

“In a moment,” he steps past you, his eyes set on the living room. 

You tense as you hear buzzing but you don’t dare turn back. He strides away as you peer down at the latte. He returns and sits across from you with your phone. He narrows his eyes at the screen as he reads the last notification as it vibes.

“What are you doing?” You reach for your phone but he keeps it out of your grasp.

“‘Hope you enjoyed the show’,” he reads out. “What show is this?”

“I don’t– who–”

“Ally, so the message says, but I do wonder if it truly is her,” his eyes meet yours sharply. “What does she mean?”

You drop your chin and take a breath. You slump down and talk to the table, “they were… being loud. When you were gone.”

“Ah,” he accepts, “and you listened?”

“N-no, I heard but I came out here so I couldn’t.”

He taps his thumb on the screen as he looks at it again. He huffs and turns it towards you but keeps a tight grip, “unlock it.”

“Huh?” You bat your lashes.

“Unlock the phone.”

“What are you doing?”

“I’m making certain you are safe, as I have done,” his tone turns rigid, “haven’t I?”

“Yes, but–”

“And you trust me, yes?”

“I do, but Jonathan–”

“Unlock it, now.”

You struck by the edge in his voice. You’ve only ever heard that when he had Colin by the scruff. Never towards you. Your lip trembles as you have no argument. He’s been so kind; he brought you breakfast and he said such sweet things and what he did…

“Sorry,” you reach across and press your fingertip to the censor to unlock it, “there.”

“Thanks,” he says tritely as he flips the phone back to face him.

You’re quiet as you focus on the container, carefully popping open the lid. The egg, avocado, an array of colourful veggies tease your hunger. It’s only then that your stomach clenches in desperation. You unwrap the bamboo fork and twirl it nervously as you peek up at Jonathan. He glares at your phone.

“Why didn’t you show me all this?” He asks.

“What do you mean?”

“These vile messages from that man?”

“I… I told you he was—”

“You didn’t tell me everything. Fawn, how can I protect you when I don’t know?” His harsh gaze makes you wince.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur.

“We both know that man is deranged. I am only trying to help. And the thought of him ever laying a finger on you,” he stops and shudders, “we’ve committed to each other, yes? So we must start from honesty.”

You gulp and nod, “you’re right. I’m sorry, but that was before and I didn’t know how to tell you…”

“Now you know.” He lays your phone down beside your cup, “that you can and should tell me everything.”

[somedayillbepeterpan]

I'm glad to have been on the right side of history for this moment.

In honour of the 7-day countdown and before this tag gets flooded by part 2 gifsets, analyses, and general insanity, I'd like to add to the Tumblr void my appreciation for Bridgerton S3.

Luke and Nicola, this whole season has been an absolute dream ❤️ I don't think you'll ever see this but I'll share it with the ones who love you as much as I do.

Thank you!

I know that the 2 previous couples weren't able to really showcase their chemistry and story because of Covid but thank you for the run-up and for introducing the world of Bridgerton to us. Thank you Phoebe, Rege, Jonny, and Simone.

Thank you to Shondaland and Netflix and the whole team/crew behind Bridgerton because the fantasy that you brought on TV is now more than than-- it is a lifestyle phenomenon.

To the cast that bring these characters to life, thank you for your patience and love for the show because that love is shown on screen and we audience appreciate your efforts.

To Julia Quinn for writing a whole family that represents the full range of love. And for sharing that to the world so we, too, can know the different facets of it.

And lastly, to my roman empire, the only reason I'll use this term--

to Luke and Nicola

THANK YOU.

For being the perfect Colin and Penelope. RMB is my favourite Bridgerton book so I was very excited to see them onscreen.

Thank you for advocating for us fans. Thank you for not making us feel ashamed for loving the steamy moments. Thank you for being so transparent about the love you have for Colin and Penelope. Your love translated well onscreen and it has made me fall in love even more with their love story.

Thank you for bringing your talent and a-game and for presenting one of the most beautiful love stories I've seen onscreen. This season has been so personal to me (same size as Nicola in height and weight, same type of height difference with my SO, and same demisexual tendencies as Colin).

Thank you for sacrificing 6 months of your life for the press tour. I can't imagine that being the easiest thing to do considering that you are both confessed introverts.

Thank you for giving a part of yourselves to each and every interview. Doing your best to be eloquent and witty even though you are exhausted from having to answer the same questions over and over. Your real life friendship made this press tour so so magical.

This maybe ending in a week's time but I will forever cherish the magic of Polin.

Thank you, Bridgerton Season 3 Polin. You will always be famous.