#coffee and resolve

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Here’s a couple of really great articles/interviews with Robbie Taylor Hunt talking about intimacy coordination more widely, but specifically on rwrb. He’s so knowledgeable and they’re really interesting and amazing reads and really showcase both his talent and why intimacy coordination is so important.

[girlthativealwaysbeen]

i think growing up is just life repeatedly sucker punching you and saying bitch you thought things were gonna better lmao no you're so naive and stupid for having hope in 20 years the world will be flaming bag of garbage and no matter how hard you work you'll get eliminated at some point

[cloudynyims]

A story of a little borrower who has lived in AFC Richmond since Jamie joined the team(the first time). It takes place a little bit after he leaves and returns to AFC Richmond (yknow, once he’s had some character development). Please excuse how it begins abruptly. Also, the team knows about the borrower. Well, except Jamie. (Can you tell who’s asks I’ve been reading too many of?) about 2.4k words!

Things had been rough since Jamie returned to AFC Richmond. Their open lifestyle with the team abruptly halted. They still remembered the day he came back. 

They were waiting in the locker room for the team to finish training. If they weren’t watching the practice with Ted, they waited near Sam’s locker. Sam was always kind and respectful toward them, regardless of what happened on the pitch. However, this time he walked in, he seemed nervous about something. 

“Sam, what’s—“

“You need to get out of here. Now,” He interrupted. They froze, as Sam never acted like this. He immediately noticed the effect it had on them and sighed, lowering his tone. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to lash out like that. But there isn’t much time. Jamie’s back; he’ll be in here any minute. We can talk tomorrow, okay? But you have to go.”

Sam, the team, and the borrower all knew that Jamie finding them would be a terrible idea. They nodded and promptly climbed down the bench to the floor. Wasting no time, they sprinted back into their hole in the walls. Once they were safe, they listened, waiting until they heard Jamie’s voice, confirming the unthinkable. So it was true.

Their mind swirled with conflicting emotions at that moment. Jamie, the one person on the team they thought was gone for good, was back. And probably no different than before, judging by what Isaac had told them about Jamie’s whereabouts since he left Richmond. Apparently, he was on some reality show that got him kicked off of Manchester City. And now he was back here.

A pit formed in their stomach thinking about the last few months. Not having to hide around, not being scared for their life, and not being worried about being vigilant 24/7 were luxuries they had come to enjoy under the care of the team. Now it felt like they were returning back to before. Before the team found them and while Jamie was still here. A life of fear, sleepless nights, and constant anxiety. 

That was about a month ago, and they still were petrified of him, just from everything they heard. From that day onward, they were usually on Roy’s person at all times. The team came to the consensus that they didn’t even want Jamie to know the borrower existed, which they were perfectly fine with. So, they spent a lot of time around Roy, because Roy only put up with Jamie when it was absolutely necessary. 

Getting used to Roy was a learning curve in itself, considering how protective he was. They were often in his pocket while he coached, just so he could ensure that they were safe. Not that they minded, they just missed their autonomy. Frankly, they hadn’t had much freedom or relaxation since Jamie came back. Everyone wanted to keep them out of his hands, so they weren’t roaming around like they used to do when they were bored. 

On another note, they had been in Roy’s pocket a few times when he and Jamie argued. It was unpleasant, to say the least, and the duo always were arguing over nothing. They both spoke way too loud, and the poor borrower's ears always rang for a little bit afterward. Roy usually deaded the conversation pretty quickly when he finally remembered they were with him. Even still, these were some of their only impressions of Jamie, which did not counteract their initial wariness around him.

They were already skeptical of Jamie, even before the team found them. So, after they got comfortable with players, the borrower asked what they all thought of Jamie. Sam had told them a little about what it was like having him as a teammate. Isaac and Colin filled them in on how he treated them, and even Dani had something to say about Jamie as a teammate. Roy, obviously, hated Jamie’s guts, but his criticisms were backed up (for the most part) by the team. None of the reviews were strikingly positive. All of these different and consistent stories solidified their opinion that Jamie was not someone to be found by.

The team only managed to keep them hidden from him for a month or two. One day after practice, Ted called the coaching staff in for a meeting in his office. Roy left them in his office, assuming they wanted some time out of his pocket. He was correct. “Stay right here, Ted wants me for a quick meeting in his office,” Roy said gruffly.

“I’m not a child, Roy. I can go where I like,” They stated, knowing that they wouldn’t leave of their own accord anyway. 

Roy rolled his eyes and started walking toward Ted’s office. “I mean it. I don’t want that prick to find you,” He said over his shoulder before closing the door to his office. And so, they sat contentedly on Roy’s desk, waiting for him to return from that meeting with Ted. 

With nothing better to do, they listened as the team filed into the locker room. The team were slightly more lively than usual, so it must’ve been a good day on the pitch. It made the borrower miss the times when they would watch the team practice from Ted’s shoulder. They saw a new side of the team that they never knew when they lived in the walls. They saw the one passion they all shared for football. 

The room suddenly became tense, and they could only imagine that Jamie walked in. The team still wasn’t very fond of him. Curiosity was testing them, and they wanted to peek out the window but remained on Roy’s desk. They were still curious, but they didn’t want Jamie to see them. Jamie would never willingly visit Roy, as far as they were concerned. So, being in Roy's office was the safest place for them. 

One could imagine their surprise when a few moments later, Jamie sauntered into the room.

“Roy? Where are you, mate? Just want to have a little chat with you, is all,” Jamie said as he leaned against the doorframe of the office. They froze. They weren’t exactly in his line of sight, but they were definitely visible. They watched, eyes wide, as Jamie waited for a response that didn’t come. 

“Fucking hell, I don’t have time to wait around for that bastard,” Jamie muttered under his breath before inviting himself into the room. He glanced around at the various shelves in the office as he slowly walked in. “Won’t even coach me, the ass.” Clearly, Jamie wasn’t in the best mood. Or, he could just be unhappy with Roy. Both were fair guesses. 

But it didn’t matter to them, because they were on the verge of being seen. By Jamie Tartt. Jamie wasn’t the tallest on the team, but his presence seemed so large at that moment. Thinking quickly, they ran behind Roy’s coffee cup and sat behind it, trying to catch their breath. They had never been this close to him before, and it was terrifying. 

Jamie looked around the office space. It was pretty barren of any decorations, so characteristic of Roy. If he was going to wait for Roy to come back from wherever he was, he might as well make himself comfortable. With a sigh, he plopped himself down on Roy’s desk chair. 

He aimlessly swiveled in the chair as he looked around. He leafed through a few of the papers on Roy’s desk before getting bored. He then started drawing on the whiteboard but quickly got tired of that as well and resigned to doing nothing.

Jamie was about to pull out his phone when he noticed the coffee cup on the desk. An idea came to his head. What better way to mess with Roy than to finish off his drink? Was it a good idea considering Jamie came to talk to Roy about coaching him? No, but it was too golden of an opportunity for him to pass up.

With a smirk, Jamie grabbed the cup, and they watched in dismay as their hiding spot was easily lifted away. They were rooted to the spot. They couldn’t move. Jamie was going to see them, and there was no avoiding it. Their mind was telling them to run, but their body wouldn’t listen. They could only watch.

Jamie, on the other hand, wasn’t paying attention. He took a long sip of the coffee only to nearly spit it back out. “Of course, he would drink straight black coffee,” Jamie scoffed. As he went to return the cup to its original position, he locked eyes with them. 

Their mind raced; their heart pounded. Time was at a standstill. They didn’t want to look up at him, but they also couldn’t tear their eyes away. Everything the players had ever told them about Jamie came rushing to the forefront of their brain. 

“No teammate has ever made me feel as bad about myself as Jamie did.”

Sam’s words specifically echoed in their head, along with their panicked thoughts. With all of these swirling in their head, they could barely pay attention to what was going on. He was just so huge. They had grown used to feeling small since being acquainted with the team, but the unease of it all resurfaced tenfold. They had deja vu from the day the team first found me. 

Jamie just… looked at them. His expression was one of confusion, then it morphed into disbelief, and finally curiosity. He blinked a few times as if he was trying to convince himself that they were real. Slowly, he set the cup on a different part of the desk without taking his eyes off them. Now they had his full attention. They shuddered involuntarily.

“What the fuck…” Jamie trailed off. As he gazed at them, he leaned a little closer. His lips were slightly parted in awe, and they could barely feel the breath of his exhales. “You’re just a tiny little thing, aren’t you?” He whispered. If they weren’t so terrified, they would’ve noticed how quiet his voice was. 

They caught sight of movement out of the corner of their eye but didn’t react quickly enough. They could only flinch back as Jamie moved his hand. They tensed up and squeezed their eyes shut, anticipating the unpleasant, sinking feeling of getting picked up against their will. They felt nothing. They peeked up to find that his hand stopped right next to them. “You’re smaller than me hand,” he marveled, still in awe of the fact that they existed.

Jamie frowned, seemingly confused as they shrunk away from his hand. Their reaction prompted him to really look at them, to take in all the emotions littered across their face. “You’re shaking. Are you alright?” In truth, They hadn’t even noticed when they began trembling. But Jamie was starting to see all of their anxious habits: from how they had barely moved since he saw them to how their eyes darted around, searching for an escape.

They couldn’t even form the words to respond; all that escaped was a sharp inhale. Their throat felt tight from the trepidation of the moment. Their body wouldn’t listen to them, even though they desperately wanted to run far, far away. Their silence seemed to perplex Jamie further. If he kept asking questions, there would be a point that they would have to respond. There was no other way out of this scenario. 

His voice dragged them out of their thoughts. “I’m sorry if I scared you,” he said, looking a little bashful. “You… you can understand me, yeah?” They barely nodded, finally giving him a semblance of an answer. He sighed with a gentle smile. “That’s good. If… if you don’t mind me asking, what are you doing here? In the club, I mean.”

There was a beat of silence. They knew they had to talk to him at some point. They took a deep breath, trying to calm their nerves. “I’m… waiting for Roy,” They mumbled, staring at their hands. Jamie couldn’t suppress a smile as he heard them speak for the first time. Such a tiny voice that fits them so perfectly. A part of him was still in disbelief that someone so small existed. Then he registered what they said. 

“You’re waiting for— You know Roy Kent?” His voice rose a bit, filled with disbelief. They nodded and backed up a few steps, growing a little more nervous. Jamie noticed and immediately softened his expression. Roy wasn’t his favorite person, but he knew had to curb his distaste for their sake. Clearly, it was making them nervous. Given how they were acting around him, he could rightfully assume that they were more comfortable with Roy.

“Does anyone else know that you’re here?” He asked, keeping his voice soft.

They nodded but hesitated before answering, wondering how he would take the answer. “Um… the rest of the team knows,” they said, purposefully avoiding his eyes that were trained on them. 

Jamie sat back in the chair, thinking for a moment. After a bit, he finally spoke. “So, everyone on the team knows about you, except me.” He stated, mostly to himself. “And you’ve been here for how long?”

“Three years, b-but the team only found me last season,” was their barely audible response. 

Jamie was sort of frustrated. He knew earning the team’s trust would be difficult, but for them to hide something like this from him was a low blow. To think that his teammates thought he’d possibly hurt them was the reason they never told him. Jamie knew he hadn’t been the best teammate in the past but, this hurt.

Then he looked back down at them again. They had not only spent the last season with the team but also lived in the club for two seasons before that. His heart twinged as he imagined how terrifying he must be to them. They had seen him at his best and worst. He could see that even though they were talking to him and being somewhat cooperative, they was beyond uncomfortable. 

Their hands were winding around each other in a nervous fray; their body and muscles were tense, ready to flee at a moment’s notice. Jamie ran his hands through his hair, contemplating his next words. 

“I’m gonna go,” Jamie began. He could tell that they perked up at those words, but swallowed his pride and continued. “I can talk to Roy later. I don’t want to make you any more uncomfortable than I have. But, I want you to know that I would never hurt you, yeah?”

They tilted their head and nodded warily. “Good.” True to his word, Jamie stood up and made his way to the door. “Cheers.” He walked out of the room, leaving them more confused than anything.

this is heavily unedited so if there are any typos plz let me know :) also, this will probably have a part 2 BUT don't expect it in a timely manner unfortunately. this took me way too long to write argh.

[koskela-knights]

At this point, with the Night Springs DLC having come out and how i've felt about Jesse's chapter and Coffee World and the overall (under) usage of named NPCs from the AW2 canon, I keep thinking....

I feel the Cult of the Tree lost all its narrative purpose and emotional impact due to FBC involvement. The Cult and the Koskelas might have well been some random unnamed NPC Cult Leaders or heck, they might as well have been replaced by a sentient lamp and their relevance and impact and the outcome would've been the same. It could've been some other random murder case that would've attracted Saga and Casey's attention to BF for how little pay-off we got for the Cult arc. The final 'wrap-up' if you will, is totally missable and optional. At this point, nobody even cares anymore that the Cult were actual the good guys all along.

Even Remedy seems to have forgotten about the whole Cult arc and the Koskelas as characters and I feel the fandom even mirrors that in some waysthere

[jaggedwolf]

traveling this month means primarily interacting with strangers and thus primarily getting read as a dude, and the funniest consequence of this is that I am somehow killing it with younger guys and older ladies socially. the former are fistbumping me while going "hey bro" and the latter are like "what a bright/polite young man"

[morsmortish]

ok. au where barty and lily are criminal law barristers (suspend your disbelief and imagine bcj would even attempt to do anything on the side of the law for just one singular moment, for the sake of this au) and they work in the same chambers. yet they constantly find themselves on opposite sides of the courtroom, representing the opposing sides, standing up for different values. they can’t help but establish a rivalry, which quickly turns into a blood-feud level enmity between them (because they’re them). lily thinks he’s entitled and lacks morals and initially assumed he only got the position due his father’s own status in the government, only for barty to turn out to be a fucking brilliant lawyer, which only makes lily hate him more. barty finds lily’s ‘uptightness’ extremely irritating and he hates how she thinks she always knows best, or acts like she has some sort of moral high ground over him. they bicker over the smallest things, like who gets which pupilage, or which timings for lunch, or what type of paper the chambers should order. it annoys every single other person in the vicinity, yet they’re the two best barristers in the whole chambers so they will never be kicked out…if only they could get along…if only…

[lepidopterium]

-

[baejax-the-great]

[First, I was rereading "Agua Caliente" and I remembered a song that played a lot in my childhood (and I had kind of forgotten) bc the lyrics somehow matched the Patrochilles dynamic in this fic. This is kind of funny bc I would never in my life associate sertanejo (it's a type of country music, I think? Idk I've never heard country, but the aesthetic is kind of similar. Anyway, it's pretty popular here) with shipping an ancient Greek couple in modern AU, but ok. And I went to listen to this song again and now I'm listening to it on a loop, so thanks for that.]

Now the real question! It's perhaps a strange question, but do you plan what you write? Like, before you write, do you have the whole structured idea in mind? I could have sworn it was like that reading the fics, but then some notes on Ao3 and certain things you say on Tumblr started to make me reflect that maybe you don't plan as much as I thought… in that case, how do you manage to connect everything so well without looking like something was left out/without prior planning??? It's magic, technique, luck or actually do you plan?

Sorry if the question is a bit "???" but I'm REALLY thinking about this! I used to write fics years ago and I was in the "won't plan" group and as expected the fics came out obviously unplanned (but that was ok with me bc it was just to pass the time and I didn't expect it to be an engaging story or anything), and here's why this ask exists: it's precisely bc I was in the “won't plan” group that I'm really intrigued by the possibility of you NOT planning bc it just doesn't seem that way reading your fics...

The short answer is that I do plan what I write, but probably not enough.

I rarely start writing a fic with an entire idea. Often it's just a vibe. But I won't start posting a fic until I know exactly what the conflict is and how it will be resolved.

This was easy in ATG, for example, because I'd already written the resolution before I even decided to write the fic. Structuring it by Patroclus's age also helped, because I could make an outline with the stuff that needed to happen and then jam stuff I wanted to happen around it. That "Stuff" could be really specific--obviously Pat had to graduate school and Achilles had to go to the Olympics on specific years, and it was also like, this section should have them fighting. This section should have them getting along, but Achilles is hiding this big lie so there should be a weird tension.

In Sunset, it took me longer to figure out the conflict/resolution. Sure, I knew that Achilles was going to cry on a Chicago street corner and get naked in Pat's kitchen, but why was he there? How did he get there? I had already written Achilles settling in to Pat's place and the scene where he gets into the lake before I decided on Aphrodite being the key to explain this whole thing. Then I knew Pat had to die. But a lot of the stuff that happened in the middle was sort of on a whim (particularly Achilles getting on the wrong L train-that was definitely just an impulse I had while finishing that chapter). Tecmessa's chapter was also a later addition, and a deeply self-indulgent one, hah.

Agua was the least planned of these three, and in some ways it was because the idea was a lot simpler. After three years, Achilles runs into Patroclus again and they reconcile in some way. I knew exactly how Patroclus would feel about the whole thing (relieved, guilty, upset, wounded, hopeful, upset about feeling hopeful). My original plan was just to set up Achilles in his shop and his new life doing his best and have him run into Patroclus at the beach, and eventually they'd go to the desert. I wrote parts of their meeting first, and then I started writing the beginning and ended up scrapping most of that. I realized I was going to have to do a lot more writing for poor Achilles. My lack of planning here did cause some difficulties--I had like three versions of that date he went on with Pat with different endings. One involved Pat in the hospital, lmao. Zag and Meg coming to stay with Achilles were kind of whims, and I had meant to have Hypnos show up for "his turn" and have Achilles send him home because no, these were not team-building exercises, but then I forgot 😩.

The reason that I need to know the conflict/resolution at the start is because I do think all the scenes in a fic should relate to it in some way, either by building up the conflict or setting the groundwork for a resolution. Even for the impulsive scenes I add just for fun, I think about how they can do this. For example, Achilles getting lost on the L allowed me to build up Pat's unreasonable anxiety, show that Ajax was also feeling it to some extent, and end in Pat saying "fuck it" and just giving in to making out with his hot, ancient boyfriend. It was also something that happened to a friend who was visiting me from out of the country and didn't have a working cell phone. That moment of watching him through the window of the L as it slowly pulled away is just etched in my memory.

In Agua Caliente, almost anything could relate to the resolution, because the resolution was "Achilles having a life," thus it didn't require as much planning. Zagreus's apartment getting flooded (something that happened to me in grad school) showed Achilles attempting to be flexible with some success while allowing himself to become closer to Zagreus, which led to a point of connection with his kids. It also made it easier to explain why Achilles was doing Zag's delivery that day when he ran into Pat. There were only a couple things that truly needed to happen in AC for the fic to make sense, and that was a resolution with Achilles' kids and then with Patroclus, of course.

I do get loose threads sometimes, side conflicts or things that didn't end up going anywhere, and those things tend to annoy me until I figure out a way to resolve them or make them otherwise relevant. Or I don't. Or sometimes I realize I need to add something/someone into the fic, and it would have been smoother if I'd added it in an earlier chapter so it didn't seem like a convenient thing I'd just thought of to solve a problem. That's always annoying to me. But whatever. It's fanfic. That's the risk of posting while you write.

[torchickentacos]

If your average MTG game does not include a twenty minute intermission where your (step)father and sister pull out google and debate a really weird technicality, then you're probably playing it wrong

[coffee-with-a-stranger]

Resolution is a powerful tool for personal growth, transformation, and empowerment in your personal and spiritual journey. Recognize that making resolutions involves setting intentions, goals, and commitments to bring about positive change, growth, and alignment with your true essence and aspirations. Embrace the idea of setting clear, meaningful resolutions that reflect your values, passions, and vision for the future, allowing you to focus your energy, attention, and actions towards manifesting your dreams and creating the life you desire.

Cultivate a mindset of determination, resilience, and self-discipline as you work towards fulfilling your resolutions, knowing that it takes courage, effort, and dedication to overcome challenges, setbacks, and obstacles along the way. Embrace the transformative power of resolution, as it can lead to self-discovery, expansion, and personal evolution, empowering you to step into your own power, potential, and purpose.

Practice embodying your resolutions through consistent action, self-reflection, and self-care, allowing yourself to stay connected with your goals, values, and intentions as you navigate through the ups and downs of your journey. Embrace the joy of progress, growth, and fulfillment that comes from staying true to your resolutions, knowing that every step forward brings you closer to the life, the self, and the future you envision.

By embracing the concept of resolution with clarity, courage, and commitment, you can harness the power of intention, action, and alignment to create a life that is authentic, meaningful, and fulfilling. Let resolutions be a compass that guides you towards your highest potential, deepest fulfillment, and greatest joy on your personal and spiritual path of growth, empowerment, and transformation.

[mochasucculent]

I hate making comics but in 2020 something possessed me to draw this page out in a few hours and then I never touched the idea again lol

If I had any willpower at all it woulda been a horror-mystery about a small isolated town that has grown complacent with the presence of a being that makes reanimated creatures out of any corpse it can get its hands(?) on lol

[tigresslanzhu]

Sinatra-San: YA-HEY! IT’S ABOUT FUCKIN’ TIME!

[that-angels-demon]

Maybe I’m slow on the draw and everyone connected these dots already, or maybe I’ve just realized how important Jim’s arc is to Aziraphale’s decision at the end of season two.

Not only does Aziraphale meet a completely new, kind person in Gabriel without his memories, but when he finally regains them, he doesn’t revert to his cold self. Gabriel is a reformed person, finally having formed his own opinions outside of the strict guise of Heaven.

And Aziraphale finally realizes that even the worst of the angels have the ability to change.

The happy couple being allowed to disappear and live their eternity together is the proof he needs to believe the others may be swayed as well.

And the Metatron’s timing in all of this is horrifically perfect, catching Zira in a vulnerability that has just formed, and pulling him right back into the cycle of abuse.

[extemporaneousmusings]

8/2/24

Today I:

-worked a good shift at the shop. I got a compliment on an oat milk flat white from an australian which was very gratifying bc they're tricky to make (imo) and trickier with non-dairy milks (not an opinion, just the science of fat and protein molecules). I got to share some neighborhood recs with this customer and her partner and they seemed super into it. I told them to come back and see me over the weekend and I hope that they do!

-got to do something I truly love, which is loading up a 4 player game on a pinball table and then playing it alllll myself. I only had one actually good ball out of the 12, I rocked a really good multiball, but it's just such a treat to have the time and space to indulge in such a way

-reworked some job app materials even though I extremely didn't want to...I did it at the bar after playing my quad game of pinball, and it actually went pretty well so I might try to work on job apps there more regularly on week nights which is really full circle bc when it was the previous iteration of the barcade I would work there all the time but for whatever reason I haven't ever done so in the past year since its been open again.

[stxrsfxte]

Lorelei & Senta being estranged best friends makes me ✨ unhinged ✨ when I think about them too long

[hiphopcherrrypop]

my coworkers are having a laugh together or smtn like TELL ME THATS THE CASE bc why TWO of them start trying to flirt w me yesterday 😭😭