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jazzthatonewriterchick · 4 months ago

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Desperado (Mizu x Self-Insert!Reader 18+ One Shot) [COMMISSION FILL]

Pairing: Mizu x Black!Fem!Plus-Sized!Reader

Synopsis: When you randomly ask Mizu to help train you to become a stronger fighter, she discovers the reason is that you plan on accompanying her on her journey for revenge. She initially refuses, but after a moment of passion turns into a night of confessed feelings and a goodbye, Mizu begins to change her mind about working alone.

Warnings: Smutty Smut; 18+ (MINORS DNI); Dom!Mizu/sub!Reader; Reader is Black, Female & Plus-Sized; Hurt/Comfort; Mild Angst; Sad Backstory; Accidental Kiss; Crush Confession; Sneaky Sex; Girl on Girl; Cunnilingus; Nipple Sucking; Gentle FDom!Mizu; Strap-On Sex/Sex w/ Toy; Mutual O; Aftercare

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters mentioned in this fic. However, as this is my writing, I do not give permission for my work to be reposted on any other sites that are not from my own accounts. Thank you!

Writer’s Note: A humongous thank you to @curiouscutie143 for her continued trust in me as her writer & her patience with me getting this posted. Halloween is a busy fucking time for a writer bro lmaoo 🤣

But I’m so happy to be getting it all done & posted in time for Halloween! I hope y’all enjoy this commission! This is the first time I’m writing something that isn’t anime-based. I don’t watch Blue Eyed Samurai personally, but I hope those who do enjoy this. -Jazz 🥰

********

“You up for another round, darling? You know I can do this all day.”

Mizu stands on the other side of the dojo, her sword hanging loosely from her hand. To any other opponent, they would take this as a sign of carelessness and try to attack the samurai in this seemingly open position. But you know Mizu. You’ve worked and trained alongside her for several years now since you met Eiji, your master and mentor.

And you know for a fact that Mizu is a highly gifted swordswoman. She never ever has her guard down, and that is why you have her training you now…despite you wanting to tell her off for being too rough.

You groan from your spot on the floor, your body coated in sweat and tingling from the constant blows you’ve been taking for over an hour now. You stand up and readjust your training clothes–a black knee-length kimono and slides. Mizu’s kimono is a deep emerald that brings out the blue of her eyes. Eyes that she has hated for years.

Once you’re finally on your feet, you grip your sword in your palms and point it at your opponent. “I can do this all day,” you utter, and you can. You know you can. Anything to get this insufferable, cocky woman on the floor. Mizu smirks and takes a bow. You do as well, beginning another round of sword fighting.

As soon as you open your eyes and straighten your back, she is coming at you, her sword drawn. With a gasp of surprise, you bring your sword up to block hers, grunting as your forearms ache with the pressure and effort it takes to keep her at bay. “Rule number one, trainee,” she whispers, her blue eyes filled with mirth. “Never ever close your eyes when you bow. That’s a death sentence.”

With another grunt, you take your foot and shove her away by pushing it against her stomach. Mizu falls back, but catches herself with one hand and easily rebalances herself. You step away from her to recover, gripping your sword. “You did that on purpose,” you accuse. She smiles cockily at you. “Well, of course. It is a battle and I’m your opponent.”

Damn her. “Bitch,” you spit. “I’ll make you pay for that.” You charge at her this time and swipe your sword at her, but she easily dodges it and jumps back away from your attack. “So hostile!” she mockingly gasps. “Didn’t Eiji tell you to stop with that kind of talk?” You swipe at her again just as her sword comes up, the steel clanging against each other.

“Eiji ain’t here,” you pant. “And I’ll stop once I get you on the floor.” You rip your sword away and swipe it at her from the left as you take your foot, aiming for her ankles. She dodges this attack as well, suddenly spinning to your right and out of your line of sight. Before you can twist around to stop her, she elbows you in the side. You fall onto your knees, your sword clattering to the floor. Mizu stands above you, panting slightly and her face rosey from the constant moving. “Rule number two: never bite off more than you can chew.”

This is why you can’t stand her. She is just too good. She’s too fast, practically turning into a blur as she dodges attacks at the speed of light. She’s too strong, her body made of steel despite her small body (which is laced with muscle). She’s too smart, sizing up her opponents and playing them like game pieces. She is truly a skilled swordswoman…and unfortunately, this is what makes her damn attractive to you.

As you lay on the floor, you glare up at her. “What, are those the lessons of Master Mizu?” you spit, panting between each word. You place a hand on your side where Mizu’s elbow collided, feeling like it burns any time you inhale. You attempt to get up, but you feel weak, your limbs wobbly.

Mizu looks down upon you with slight worry, noticing that the time it takes you to get off the floor is getting slimmer. “Listen, V,” she begins, but you jut a hand out to stop her. “Don’t even say it,” you growl, stubbornly getting up onto your knees. “I don’t need to rest. I’m not gonna get any stronger by laying on my ass.”

Mizu sighs, frowning. “We’ve been at this for an hour and you have yet to put a scratch on me,” she states, shaking her head at you. “Not to mention all this week.” And she’s right. Since she started training you at the beginning of this week after you begrudgingly asked her for one-on-one training sessions, you have barely made her fumble or falter.

You glare at her, feeling a twist in your gut. “Are you implying that I can’t beat you?” you hiss. “You think just because Eiji’s got a shine to you, you’re all that?”

You watch as your words register across Mizu’s face, causing her forehead to wrinkle in confusion. “What?” she asks before she dodges your attack. Just barely. You used your words as a distraction from your left foot swiping at her ankles just as your sword aimed at her face.

Mizu stumbles but manages to right herself and blocks your sword with one hand in front of her face. You smile, satisfied.“Ha,” you huff. “Gotcha.” The swordswoman’s confused expression softens and she breaks out into a crooked smile. “Not bad,” she comments. “I’ll give you that one. I guess my training is paying off.”

You roll your eyes as she dusts herself off. “Don’t flatter yourself,” you scoff. “You’re a good fighter, I can admit that, but we’ve all got our predecessors.” You watch as she walks over to the corner of the room where she lowers her sword and picks up two cups of water. She walks back over and hands one for you, silent. You take it, ignoring the flip in your stomach when your fingers brush with hers.

“Thanks,” you quietly say. She nods and takes her respective place on the sidelines. As she gulps down her water, she looks out the window at the twilight sky. The horizon is pink, the sun just a thin line. “It’s almost sundown,” she comments. “Only a day left.”

You silently stare at her, sipping your water. You know what she means even if she doesn’t say it: only a day until she leaves for her trip of revenge. “How’d the Master take it when you told him your plan?” you curiously ask. She turns to you, smirking. “Oh, you know, just the usual ‘be careful’ lecture and ‘don’t let revenge guide you’ BS.” She chuckled wryly to herself and your stomach clenches.

“Why?” she asks, smirking at you in the blue-pink light. “Will you miss me?” You look at everything but her and those damn eyes. “Please,” you scoff, averting her gaze. “It’ll be nice to have the dojo and washroom to myself for once.”

She chuckles, the sound deep and smooth. “So I’m curious,” she begins, taking a towel from the floor and tossing it over her shoulders. “How come you asked me to train you all of a sudden? You always seemed pretty adamant about not wanting to train with me before.”

You knew she would ask you this again, so you’ve already come up with a believable reason. You can’t let her know the real reason you asked. “I told you: the Master holds you up on a pedestal and I figured maybe I could take some tips from you about fighting. Why do you seem so shocked?”

Mizu passively shrugs. “Well, we never exactly saw eye to eye,” she wryly chuckles. “It’s been like that for years now—we’ve always kept to ourselves and only came together when ordered to, but now…it’s different.” And she’s right. You’ve always carried this rivalry and tension between each other since your teen years. She knows something is up by the way she cocks her head at you. “Is that really all it is?” she asks. “You just want to get stronger?”

You simmer, not appreciating her tone. “Why are you saying it like that?” you sharply ask. “Like I have some ulterior motive in asking you to help train me?” The swordswoman’s brows raise in surprise at your switch-up. “I never said that…unless you do.”

Fuck. You just gave yourself away. You look away out into the sky, focusing on the setting sun. “V, it’s just me,” Mizu says, her soft voice squeezing your heart. “I’m going to tell the Master anything you don’t want me to.” Finally, you break and slump in defeat. “You really want to know why?” you sigh. You don’t wait for her to say yes. “I’m planning to go with you to kill the four white men.”

The silence that follows is deafening and seems to stretch on forever. You feel your blood pressure rise as anxiety swells around you. “You’re…what?” Mizu finally asks, squinting at you. She scoffs to herself, flabbergasted. “No. No, you’re not. Why would you want to do that, V?”

“Why do you think?” you shook back. “To get revenge on the men that destroyed my home.” Mizu’s face softens in realization. “Wait…they raided your home as well?” You nod, gripping the cup so hard that you believe it will break. It was so long ago, but the wounds are still fresh. The child that lost their home to a burning husk is still inside of you.

“They didn’t kill my mother, nor my father, but we were forced to leave. I had to give up almost everything that gave me happiness that day. My mother never recovered.” You clutch the cup in your hands harder, wanting to chuck it at the nearest wall. “Now I want to take my happiness back and see those motherfuckers dead…and I want to be the one to do it.”

Mizu doesn’t say anything for a long moment, probably processing everything. You never told her any of this as a way to protect yourself. In this life, you can’t get close to anyone, which is why you’ve ignored your attraction to her for so long. “I’m sorry about all of that,” she soberly says. “But I can’t just let you join me on this quest, V. This is for me and me only. I’ve been planning this for months!”

You finally toss the cup aside, fed up. “So what would change?” you ask, scowling at her from across the room. “I’m not trying to steal your thunder, Mizu! But don’t you think it would make more sense to have more help on your journey?”

She pauses, thinking it over for a moment. Then she sighs, pinching her nose. “I can’t allow it,” she says. “I’m sorry, but you can’t go. I need to do this alone. So this is why you asked me to train you? To be strong enough to fight off those men?” She sounds almost angry at the idea. You give a bark of a laugh, shaking your head. “Mizu, you and I both know that you’re the best fighter. You’re strong, fast, and damn cold. If I’m gonna put their bodies in the ground, I need to learn from the best.”

That wrinkle appears in Mizu’s forehead again as her brows furrow at you. “The best?” she repeats. “Is…that what you think? That I’m the best?” You scoff, wiping at your sweaty brow and avert your gaze, not wanting to see the pity in her eyes. “Don’t play the humble type. You know that you’re the best. Why else would you be here?”

You turn away from her, facing the wall. You feel small. Weak. Both things that Eiji has tirelessly worked to break since you were a teen…and evidently failed at. “Did you hear what you just said, V?” Mizu asks. “If you weren’t an exceptional fighter, why else would you be here with me?”

At her words and the genuine nature of them, you turn around to face her. She has crossed the threshold of the room and is standing a foot away from you now. “I think that you’re amazing, despite our differences, and me not wanting you to come along on this dangerous journey has nothing to do with our rivalry. You’re still my teammate and Eiji’s fellow student.”

She turns away, her fists clenched and stares at the quickly-darkening sky. “If something happened to you on my watch, it would be my fault. I can’t allow that.” Your heart pounds faster at her confession. It feels almost too intimate to hear. But it only does so much to sway you. “So…what now?” you scoff. “You just leave me high and dry with that? I’m just supposed to stay here because you asked me to?”

Mizu turns to you, her eyes narrowed and her mouth in a thin line. “I’m not asking you, V: I’m telling you. You’re not going with me.”

The stubborn side of you wants you to scream. To fuss. To plead your case and argue until your voice is raw. Months of planning and working up the nerve to go with her has brought you here. But instead of all of that, you do something that neither one of you expects: you cry.

It comes too quickly for you to stop it and you find yourself sobbing right in front of your teammate. Mizu’s eyes widen an inch at the sight and then takes a step forward. “V,” she softly says. You back away from her, vigorously shaking your head. “Don’t,” you demand. “Don’t look at me.”

You cover your wet face as your shoulders shake, unable to stop the tears or the pain of your past from pouring over. You suddenly feel Mizu’s soft hand on your shoulder. “V,” she says again. “I’m sorry.”

You shake your head again, refusing her kindness. “I’m not good enough,” you sob. “I need to leave here.”

Mizu snatches your hands away from your face, forcing you to look at her. “No, you don’t. You don’t need to leave. You belong here.” You blink at her, staring deep into her eyes that remind you so much of the oceans surrounding faraway islands that you’ve seen in books.

You don’t know how what happens next happens or who leans in first, but suddenly, her lips are on yours. It is a soft, gentle kiss that steals your breath and silences your sobs, filling you with nothing but warmth. It takes away all the bad thoughts and feelings for the few seconds that it happens. Time freezes and nothing else matters but you and her.

But as just quickly as it happens, it ends. Mizu pulls away and looks absolutely horrified. “I’m…sorry,” she says. “Goddammit, why did I do that?” She turns away, covering her mouth in shock. “I need to go.”

Quickly, she moves to gather her word and exit the dojo, her footsteps quick and brisk. “Wait,” you say, but it’s quiet and barely above a whisper. She leaves you standing there alone, letting the door to the dojo close with a deafening slam.

***********

That night is a warm one. Cicadas buzz outside your bedroom window which is wide open, letting the summer air waft in.

Only one lone candle that you pick up by its handle burns brightly on your bedside. Your bedroom, dimly lit by the flickering flame of the candle, is cast in shadows, one of which is you. It stretches and wavers against the walls as you tip-toe out of your room, pushing aside the paper door to enter into the narrow hallway.

Eiji’s bed chambers are situated on the other side of the home, but you still walk carefully and gingerly. The man is known for having ears like a goddamn hawk.

Your shadow follows you against the wall as you creep down the hallway to one bedroom that is always kept closed in the night. You feel you heart pound with every step you take, your mind telling you to turn around and walk back. To not go down this road. Not to get involved with whatever started during training.

You tried to deny the way your body sung once Mizu’s lips left yours. You tried to tell yourself that it was just a slip; a heat of the moment in such a passionate moment. Mizu was only comforting you and got caught up. She had been no more than a ghost since then, keeping to herself and only speaking when spoken to at dinner with Eiji.

You found yourself wanting to steal glances of her, talk to her behind closed doors. Things you wouldn’t have dared to have imagined or thought about before the kiss. You had forbidden yourself from ever getting close like that to anyone since you ventured down the road of becoming a samurai fighter.

But now? You couldn’t think about anything but Mizu’s lips on yours or the fresh scent of cotton from her clothes. You couldn’t even sleep, which has led you to creeping into her bedroom like a damn stalker. When you enter her bedroom, it is dark, hued in a dark blue from the night sky outside of her bedroom window.

She sleeps on a cot with nothing more but a sheet thrown across her tall, lean frame. You almost feel bad about waking her. All it takes it for you to close the door with a soft click for her to stir awake. With an exhale of breath, Mizu instantly grabs her sword from beside her and points it at you, her blue eyes predatory slits.

“It’s me, it’s me!” You whisper, putting your hands up in defense. As her eyes adjust to the sight of you in the darkness, she slowly lowers her sword, her brows furrowed. “V?” She groggily asks. Her voice sounds unfortunately attractive when it’s thick with sleep. “What are you doing in here?” She questions. “What’s wrong?”

You swallow thickly, your feet frozen. You aren’t sure how to start this. You’ve never done something like this before, especially something so forbidden for a samurai. They don’t love. They don’t touch. They don’t even think about perversions. But since Mizu’s kiss, you need something, especially something to wipe away the pain and self loathing.

So you lower the candle on the table where a glass of water sits and gently sit down next to Mizu, your feet tucked underneath your body. She stares at you, alarmed. “Wha—“

“Don’t talk,” you interrupt. “Just listen before I lose my nerve. Look, I know that what happened earlier today was a mistake, but we’d both be lying if we said we didn’t enjoy it, right?” You watch Mizu for a reaction, your heart pummeling against your rib cage. Slowly, she nods, her lips pressed into a thin line. “Right…so why not continue it?”

The samurai’s brows furrow in confusion. “Wait…so you came in here to ask about us kissing?” She carefully asks. You can feel yourself becoming hot in your satin slip and you swallow the lump in your throat before continuing. “Not just kissing,” you softly reply. “More than that.”

Mizu is silent for a moment, processing your cryptic words. “You mean…bedding you?” She asks, her brows raising. “V, you know we don’t do that.”

You flush with shame, huffing. “Obviously, I know that or I wouldn’t be coming to you in secret!” you hiss. “But what happened during that kiss set us both back. The last thing we need to do is to lose any kind of focus on what we need to do…so why not do something about it now?”

You patiently wait for Mizu’s response, feeling like a shaking leaf in the cold autumn air. The last thing you need to hear is a no, which is the worst case scenario, but if she does, you’ll tuck your tail between your thick legs and try to forget this ever happened. You’ll even pack your things and leave. You’ve already planned where to go once you pack your things and—

“Okay,” Mizu says. You nearly get whiplash turning to look at her. “I’m sorry, what?” You ask. The whole room has suddenly gotten hotter and the walls have begun to close in.

She sits there, looking absolutely normal and unbothered despite agreeing to sex with you, her rival. “I said okay,” she repeats, but then puts up a finger. “But I have rules. “If we are going to do this, we need to do it in a safe, secure, and quiet manner.” Her face is stern as if she won’t take no for an answer.

You briefly wonder if she has ever done this before, but you figure now is not the time to ask that. So you nod and patiently wait for her ground rules. It’s the least you can do for her agreeing to this. “Number one: we give each other consent for everything, even if it’s touching somewhere we may enjoy.” You nod, agreeing. You need to get to know her and vice versa, so asking and giving consent is 100% needed.

“Number two: we respect each others’ no for anything.” Once again, you agree with a nod.

“Number three: keep it down so Eiji doesn’t hear us. It’s bad enough we’re even doing this in his home.” Mizu gives you a knowing look that makes you want to argue, but you keep your mouth buttoned tight.

“And number four: after we finish, we never speak of this again. I don’t know if you’ll see me again, but if you do, we won’t speak of this at all. Understood?” Mizu fixes you with a firm stare, her blue eyes piercing into yours.

“What if I forget all of these?” You ask, ever the stubborn one. Mizu just rolls her eyes, even laughing a bit. “You’re not. It’s only four, V; you’re not dumb.” She leans back against her pillow, her sleep shirt unbuttoned slightly to reveal her collarbone and the dip of her cleavage. “Now are we gonna do this or not?” She asks, raising an eyebrow at you.

This doesn’t turn you off or make you nervous though. If anything, it makes you hungry to give in to the challenge. So you slowly move closer to the samurai, lock eyes with hers, and slowly lean in to give her time to move away if she rethinks this. She doesn’t. Her eyes flicker down to your lips and then close when they finally meet yours.

They are soft and warm, just as they were hours before when you shared your first kiss. You can’t help but softly moan at the contact and cringe when Mizu chuckles against your lips. You can tell she enjoys it too by the way she gently cups your cheek, holding your face still as you kiss her with bated breath. Your slow, tentative movements soon grow eager as you get to know each other’s mouths, your tongues soon swirling with one another and soft moans traveling from one mouth to the other.

Somehow that leads to Mizu bringing you closer by your waist and sitting you on top of her lap. She does it slowly, giving you a chance to push her away or tell her no, but you don’t. You won’t admit it to her, but it feels good to be in her arms, her capable hands on your waist. “Is this okay?” She breathlessly whispers, her blue eyes peering up at you.

Wordlessly, you nod and continue kissing, your arms wrapped around her neck and hers around your waist. You never thought you’d ever be this close to her and now here you are, feeling her skin under your fingertips and her muscled body against your softer, plumper one. Her fingers run down your back to hold your ass, gripping harder when you moan into her mouth.

Your hips instinctively grind against hers, emitting a soft hum from her that instantly travels to your pussy. It throbs impatiently in your panties, sliding across Mizu’s linen sleep pants. The fabric adds immense friction which causes immense pleasure. “If I didn’t know any better,” she whispers against your lips. “I’d say you’re enjoying this.”

Instead of answering, you pitifully whimper, causing Mizu to lightly laugh. She steals another kiss, lingering just on your bottom lip and gently pulling it between her teeth. The tiny act makes you gush, your cunt like a goddamn lake. When will this woman just take off your clothes and fuck you?

As if hearing your mind, Mizu pulls away to stare at you, her eyes hooded and filled with lust. “I want to lie you down, take off all of your clothes, and spread your legs,” she whispers. “Is that okay?” Your mind slowly processes her words, but the entire world seems to be moving too quickly to keep up. You find yourself squeaking out a “yes” to which she takes as confirmation.

With all of the quickness of the speed of light, Mizu flips you onto your back underneath her. She gives you time to catch your breath after the world spins around you before sliding her hands up your night slip. You move your hips up to give her space to pull it up your waist and then lean up to let her take it off of you. Once you’re semi-naked in your panties, she stops and silently stares you down for a moment.

She sits above you, her blue eyes roaming over your brown skin, soft tummy and thighs, and heavy breasts with embarrassingly hard nipples. “What?” You sharply ask, embarrassed by her look. You’ve never been naked in front of anyone but your parents as a child and yourself. You go to cover your tits, but Mizu stops you, taking your hands in hers. “Don’t,” she softly demands. “You…have a beautiful body.”

Pink colors the porcelain skin of her cheeks, noticeable even in the dimly-lit bedroom. You instantly shiver at her words, suddenly feeling beautiful in the candlelight. You watch hungrily as she unbuttons her sleep shirt, revealing her own naked, smaller breasts underneath. “Don’t want to ruin it,” she says, tossing the shirt away.

You ogle at her chest, salivating at the sight of her hard, pink nipples. You don’t get a chance to do it for long because Mizu’s lips are suddenly tracing across every inch of your body. Your stomach. Your sides. Your waist. Your neck. Your breasts. Your thighs. Her kisses leave delicious shivers and trails of fire in their wake that make you shudder and quietly moan, keeping yourself as quiet as you can.

Finally, Mizu moves down to the promise land and gently spreads your thighs apart. She loops her fingers between the waistband of your panties, but pauses, looking at you. You give her a nod for her to continue and she does, slowly dragging the thin, damp article of cloth down your quivering thighs to reveal your puffy, sobbing wet cunt to her.

You briefly wonder if she’s ever seen another woman’s pussy with the way she stares at yours. Like it’s a treasure. Like it’s the best thing she’s ever seen. You almost laugh at her reaction until she begins littering your lips in soft kisses. You hum in pleasure, small bolts of electricity shooting through you with every kiss she makes on your clit. When she uses the two pads of her index and middle fingers to rub the needy button, you have to cover your mouth to avoid moaning any louder than you are.

“Is this okay?” She asks, looking up at you through the V of your thighs. You nod, biting your lower lip. “Yes,” you breathlessly reply. “Do it harder.” She smirks and does as you request, applying a bit of pressure to your clit as she rubs it in small semi-circles.

You grip the sheet below you, needing to hold onto something. You don’t realize how much you’ll need something to grip until later after Mizu holds your gaze with hers. “I want to taste you,” she whispers, her gaze intense and lust-filled. “Tell me that it’s okay. I won’t do it until you say it, V.”

Your arousal wipes away the embarrassment at the fact that your rival is about to put their mouth on your pussy. “Yes,” you nearly beg. “Please just do it, Mizu.” Your answer pleases the samurai and before you know it, her luscious lips are puckering against your pussy while her tongue explores you.

You once again wonder if she’s ever had experience with a woman’s pussy other than yours before. Because the way she licks your cunt and swallows you like you’re her last meal for a while is nothing short of a skill. You’ve never felt such pleasure before. It makes you writhe and do your very damndest to hold your voice back. When Mizu does ‘a thing’ where she rolls her tongue along the underside of your clit, you nearly snap your back in half arching up into her mouth. “Like that!” You gasp. “Do that again!”

You feel Mizu smile against your clit as she fulfills your request, still rubbing your clit as she does so. Your hands fall down to toy with your breasts, but she stops you, placing one firm hand on your wrist. She peeks up at you through the valley of your thighs almost predatory-like. “Don’t,” she orders. “Keep them above your head. Don’t move an inch.”

Her firm voice renders you speechless. With the pleasure she is giving you, you’re willing to do anything she wants. You place your hands above your head as she uses one hand to switch between both nipples, gently tweaking and pinching them as she sloppily eats at your cunt. You see stars and you feel like you’re soaring. All of the bad thoughts are wiped clean. All you can think about is cumming. “Shit!” You whine, your words soft whimpers. “Please, please!”

Mizu gazes at you as she laps at your pussy. “Please what, baby?” She coos. “You want me to make you cum?” You frantically nod, delirious from the place. “Hold out for just a little bit longer. You’ll cum when I tell you to, right?” Once again, you nod and do as she says, holding on despite the urge to cum growing and growing inside of you.

When Mizu finally sinks her finger inside of you and curls upward, that is the straw that breaks the camel’s back. She must sense it because her movements grow faster, her finger stroking you at a quick pace that makes your hips lift and grind against her palm. “Go ahead, baby,” she softly growls. “Cum for me. Cum all over me.”

And you do. Your orgasm is so intense that you have to cover your mouth as you cum, your loud moans muffled by your palm. You release all over Mizu’s hand and greedy tongue that helps you through your orgasm, licking you clean of every ounce of your cream. It’s an orgasm that is the closest to heaven you will ever be.

Finally, it fades and your body suffers from the aftershocks, your entire being shaking and quaking under Mizu’s touch. “God!” You gasp, tossing your hand off of your mouth to grip something. Anything. Your hand falls onto the dresser drawer beside you, but you mindlessly pull too hard and the drawer comes out.

“Oh, shit!” You hiss, thinking that you’re done for, but Mizu once again astounds you when she races to catch the falling drawer. The silence that follows is deafening as you both process what just happened and what could’ve happened. “I’m sorry,” you breathlessly whisper, still recovering from your orgasm.

“It’s fine,” she replies. “It was an accident.” Then both of your eyes tick down to the item that wasn’t so lucky to have been caught by her sitting on the cot. You squint at the strange device, nothing how it curves upward and is shaped just like a….oh.

“Is that a penis?!” You hiss, pointing at the thing. It is black, silicon, and about 5-6 inches give or take. Mizu clears her throat, fixing the drawer and pushing it back in its place. “A strap-on, actually,” she corrects you. “But yes, it’s a sex toy. I had it for myself.” You gape at her, stunned to silence. “I need pleasure too,” she says with a passive shrug. “And yes, I’ve used it on someone before, but that was a long time ago.”

She seems so nonchalant about the fact that she just owns a fake dick, but the idea of her using it on herself turns you on more than you’d like to admit. “Does it feel…nice?” You carefully ask. Mizu pauses, taking a moment to ponder this. “To me, yes, especially with this.” She fishes a glass bottle of lube wrapped in cloth out of her drawer. “My partner for the night thought so too…why?”

She stares at you intensely, the flames dancing in her eyes from the candle making a fire burn within you. Shyly, you stare down at the strap-on, averting your eyes from hers. “I want to try it,” you blurt. The samurai is silent for a moment before she starts quietly laughing. “You must be desperate,” she chuckles.

You cluck your tongue against the roof of your mouth and smack her arm. “I’m just kidding,” she says, putting her hands up in defense. Her eyes twinkle with mirth and lust. “Alright, but I want to try something with you first. Lay back for me.”

You don’t know what she wants to try, but you’d be lying if you said you aren’t eager to find out. If it’s anything like that skillful pussy-eating, you’re in for a treat! You lay back on the cot and she coaxes you to open your legs still sticky and wet with her saliva and your cum from your last orgasm. She then applies some lube to her fingers, filling the air with the scent of coconut and aloe Vera. “This will be cold when I apply it. It warms up to body temperature once you apply it.”

You nod and stay quiet as she moves towards you. Once her fingertips touch your pussy lips, you softly gasp at the cool liquid. But quickly, it warms and makes your skin feel slightly tingly. “That’s it,” she softly coos as your body relaxes. She slowly applies some inside of you, relishing your soft moans and hums of pleasure as her fingers curl upward to caress your clit.

Once finished, she slips them out of you and sucks on her digits, locking eyes with yours. It’s one of the most erotic things you’ve ever seen and it makes your cunt throb in need for her again. “Better now?” You nod, feeling tingly. Now finished with you, she takes off her pants along with her underwear, revealing her pale, muscular thighs, firm ass, and mound coated in a tiny tuft of black hair.

“Here.” She passes you the bottle despite your stunned expression at seeing all of her. “I want you to touch me too.” After showing you where to touch her and instructing you how to do so, you take two fingers and gently run the lubrication over her delicate, wet cunt. You relish the sighs and soft moans she makes, loving that it’s you making her feel like this.

Once you’re finished, she hovers over you and presses your lips to yours in a heated kiss. She then pulls away and looks down at you, her eyes like twin oceans flickering in the candlelight. “I want to grind myself against you,” she murmurs. “Can I do that?” You’d be an idiot to refuse this. “Yes,” you whisper. “Go ahead.”

Spreading your legs wide for her, Mizu places herself between your thighs and angles her hips so her cunt is directly against yours. Keeping her eyes on you, she begins to rock her hips against you, causing you both to gasp in the candlelight and the silvery moonlight pouring through the bedroom window. Her clit slides against yours with ease thanks to the lube, causing an almost agonizing pleasure that has your body clenching and your hands gripping her ass.

“Does it feel good, baby?” Mizu whispers to you, a teasing tilt in her voice. You can only helplessly moan in response, making her chuckle. “You know, you’re really cute like this. I’m starting to think you were always so catty was only because you wanted me to fuck you.”

You whimper, wanting to defend yourself from her raunchy taunt, but the blinding pleasure stops. You can’t think about anything but her body and her slick cunt against yours, the skin to skin contact making it hard to focus or rationalize. It doesn’t take long for the urge to cum to rise again, that knot in your core tightening. “I’m gonna cum,” you whisper. “Y-You’re gonna make me cum!”

Mizu hums in encouragement, rolling her hips at a faster pace. “Go ahead then,” she whispers, her breath coming out in short puffs. “Cum for me, love. I’m right there too.” You shake your head, stopping her by firmly grabbing her hips. “I want the strap,” you plead. “I want you to fuck me again.”

Mizu pauses, stunned by your begging…and then a slow smile crosses her face. “Okay then,” she replies, humored. “But if you don’t like it, tell me, okay?” You nod and she pecks you on the cheek before grabbing the strap-on. You watch her strap it onto her waist and place it right below her pelvis so it looks as if she really has a dick.

You never thought this would be so hot to you, but it is. It’s a sight good enough to cum too. She then hikes your legs over her waist and, finally, slowly slides inside of you. She does so inch by inch, paying close attention to your body. The orgasm and lube help too, allowing her to grind against you as she slides in. You gasp at the new sensation, feeling stretched but not painfully so.

Your hands immediately grab her waist as she begins to rock against you, rubbing your clit against her pelvis while the underside of the strap-on stimulates her clit. You look at her face, flushed with pleasure, and suddenly, the urge to cum rises again. You want her to cum too. You want this night to be special; one that neither one of you will forget no matter what happens.

“Fuck me, Mizu,” you quietly beg. “Do whatever you want to me.”

All of your walls of pride and protection crumble around her fake cock and hands that grip your waist and toy with your tits. As if igniting a fire inside of her, Mizu begins to rock harder and faster against you, fucking you into the floor with the strap-on. Your shadows flash against the walls in the orangey candlelight, becoming one.

Mizu takes your arms and places them above your head as she settles between your legs, pushing herself deeper. She practically lays on top of you, her breasts pressed against yours to add to the friction. “I’m really gonna miss you, you know that?” She pants, still pistoning her hips. “You’re being so good for me, V. It’s so hard to leave you.”

You feel tears begin to burn in your eyes. You can’t decide if it’s from her words or from the immense pleasure you’re feeling as she bumps against you. Either way, the sex becomes even more intense and soon, you can’t control your body. You wrap your legs around her waist and bring her closer, muffling your moans into her shoulder. She does the same, digging her face into your neck as she gasps and moans.

After a few more intense thrusts, Mizu finally cums, letting out a moan of your name. It causes your orgasm to trigger and your pussy clenches around the strap as you cum with a long moan of release. Like a balloon popping, all of the negative energy and thoughts built inside of you is released in a rush as you climax, your body shaking and writhing underneath Mizu’s. Her hips continue to roll against you, taking you both through your orgasm, until your highs fade.

Your head is blank, your body is tired, and you feel like you’re walking through a cloud of fog as Mizu pulls out and rolls beside you. You feel dazed, but good. Better than you have in months. For a while, you both just lay side by side, silently staring at the ceiling as the candle continues to melt down to just the matchstick. The scent of candle wax and sex is thick in the air, somehow lulling you to sleep.

You don’t remember much before sleep catches up to you, but you do know you turn to Mizu and softly whisper, “Thank you”. A hand then moved to grab yours, holding it between the space of your bodies. “You’re welcome,” Mizu whispers back.

When you awaken, it is barely dawn. The sky is still dark and the candle is done for, plunging you in complete darkness. Beside you, Mizu is gone from her spot. Your heart picks up speed and anxiety makes you feel frazzled as you sit up, still naked beneath her sheet.

But all of that subsides when you find her sitting at the bottom of the cot, dressed and just sliding her sword into the sheath on her back. She turns when she sees you sitting there and smiles. “Good morning,” she gently says. “It’s nearly dawn. I fixed you breakfast so you wouldn’t be hungry before we leave.”

She passes a bowl of rice, poached eggs, and pickled plums to you, but you don’t touch it. Your mind scratches like a record player on one word she said. “We?” You parrot, confused. “What do you mean? Aren’t you leaving soon?”

Mizu nods, looking guilty for even thinking this. “Yes, but I realized what I’d be leaving behind if I did go alone…so I want you to come with me.” A light blush once again coats her face despite her appearance. To the outside world, she will be a man.

"If you’re ready for that,” she adds. “I promise I’ll protect you as much as I can, V, but you have to be prepared for any kind of danger. It was wrong for me to try and stop you from what you feel is your destiny too.”

She covers your knee with her hand, sending tendrils of warmth throughout your body. “So are you coming?” Are you coming? You’d have to be the village idiot to say no. You smile, unable stop it. “Hell yes.”

Mizu smiles too, looking so much like the woman you care about and not the hardened samurai the world will view her as. “Then eat up. We head out before the sun rises.”

And so you eat, knowing that in a few hours, you’ll be on the journey of a lifetime with a partner you wouldn't give up for the world.

THE END.

#blue eyed samurai #mizu x reader #mizu x y/n #black fanfic writer #smutty smut #my works #black coded reader #my one shots

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vile-bestia · 1 year ago

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why mizu is, in fact, not cis

Everyone is very angry at everyone about how to see or not see Mizu’s identity; being unable to shut up, and having fixated on the show a bit, i’m excited to finally join my first to-the-death-tumblr-discourse-battle.

I'm going to use mostly he/him for Mizu, but please read the premise below. Read the colored strings of text 😭

The main argument for Mizu being a woman is that which has as its basis the fact that cross-dressing is for Mizu an external need: for one, it is a need for protection from patriarchal bonds; secondly, it is a need for independence - Akemi’s story is one of independence as well, of feminine independence, and we have more than one woman pursuing such thing; we could go on with an analysis of brothels as a feminine space, but, alas - and thirdly, it is a need of obligation: Mizu needs to maintain the masculine identity in order to attain the object of his vow.

I find, however, that while the argument stands as perfectly sound (and as canon) it isn’t exhaustive enough of the layered experience of gender in BES.

The trans coding is simply undeniable to me, whether it was intentional or not. I do not mean to say that Mizu is a binary trans man; that would be an approach as reductionist as confirming she is exclusively a woman. However, I find that some behaviours of Mizu’s are coded as dysphoric reactions.

Most of my justifications for this reasoning come from episodes 2, 5 and 8.

In episode 2,

Ringo is vowing to never reveal Mizu’s secret: “I’ll never tell anybody you’re a g-“; and as soon as he’s about to say girl, Mizu is just as ready to slice his throat. Mizu being worried about someone else hearing or witnessing the interaction doesn’t seem completely plausible to me: they’re alone in snowy woods, and, most likely, Mizu wouldn’t have confirmed time and again how readily he’d kill Ringo.

Then comes episode 5,

which is in my opinion the most layered and the most exhaustive in regards to Mizu’s experience of gender, especially regarding his experience of the feminine. First and foremost, it tells the ultimate teaching: that gender isn’t but a performance, just as the gender roles are portrayed through theatre in the episode. As for the dysphoric reaction, it's the whole thing. Mizu is miserable even when we suppose that the marriage could be a relatively happy time. That's another reason why I suppose the puppet theatre tells Mizu's internal sense of self as well (see paragraph 4).

(And, about gender being performative, see how kabuki theatre was born in the Edo period and how, before being banned from acting, women cross-dressed to play male characters, and men cross-dressed to play female characters. See “professional transvestites” trained to be prostitutes, Kagema being trained from a young age to „act" like members of the other sex; see how by the beginning of the 18th century AFAB sex workers would try to figure out a way to set themselves apart from wakashu, creating an entirely new space for female crossdressers in the adult entertainment sphere; see ukiyo-e representations - chigo monogatari and yukiyo-zoshi literature; stories by Ihara Saikaku that are full of "transgender behaviours" and more)

Back to ep 5:

1. Theme of performance

The theme of performance, which also is the one of Mizu performing femininity for Mikio (in function of the well-being of Mizu’s mother), but being at once unable to suppress masculinity as the only space in which Mizu seems to be comfortable: e.g., it’s a little detail, but Mizu’s only good in the kitchen when cutting vegetables, because comfortable with blades, certainly not with cooking; again Mizu having to perform femininity is when he does makeup to “make-up”, to soften Mikio’s spirit, who feels invalidated by Mizu’s masculinity when it starts to interfere with his pride, and such other details; I even thought of the sword as a symbol for “learned” masculinity: the first time this thought occurred was when it was characterized by sensuality in the scene where the spouses spar: “Unsheathe it. Let me see your blade;” and I interpreted it as masculinity being the only space that allows intimacy as well; then comes the time where Mizu learns he does not need a sword to fight, meaning to me that she can embody masculinity without having to prove it to others. And then comes the reforging of the sword’s meteorite to include “impurities”, and the rite that Mizu performs. I assume that “a sword too pure” is the symbol of, again, learned hypermasculinity to appease patriarchal expectations, and is too pure because it’s Mizu rejecting part of himself, trying to exclude all “impurities”, whether they are being half white, or being half woman. Taigen himself is the one to tell Mizu he can fight without a sword (ep 7, but done in ep 3 or 4 and ep 6 already), and then the situation starts to bear sexual tension, which I directly link to the sensual connotation of the sparring cited earlier up. Possibly, this particular situation could also mean acceptance of Mizu's lack of a native "sword".

2. Gender roles

But a more sound consideration is (i would like to hope so) the one about the whole marriage being told through puppets, and the puppets themselves. While they are different characters, first of all we see an inversion of gender in the roles: at first Mizu is the Ronin because he performs a masculine role of protection, an “active” role; then, Mizu’s role is reversed in function of his marriage. We see Mizu surrendering (forcibly, being manipulated) to femininity as soon as his mother guilt-trips him into marrying, and the ronin puppet assumes a submissive pose, long before the role reversal.

3. A note:

it yet does not seem to me like the role reversal is, so to say, complete: even after the reversal, the narrator tells details about the ronin that are actually details about Mizu, e.g. when the two marry, and despite the positions of the puppets match the ones of the spouses, it is said that the ronin's loyalty is no more turned towards his "path of revenge," (Mizu's) "but to his bride" - in the perspective explained below, perhaps Mizu's own femininity. Also, i find Mizu might perceive Mikio as the bride, and himself as the husband - as an argument it can't stand alone, or it would bare no strength, but I will use it in correlation with the other points made, until now and later, to argue that Mizu thinks of himself as a guy.

4. Performance of Mizu's sides, assimilable to when she has the vision of killing his white side, shortly before facing the four fangs or whatever their name was

This, and one more tiny detail, bring me to think that not only do we talk about external roles, but about Mizu’s self-perception. I'm referring to when it is said that “for the first time in many years, the ronin felt the storm rage inside him.” The storm is a symbol belonging to Mizu (literally it occurs in the first 2 minutes of the episode), and it is explicit that it isn’t something that happens for the first time, but rather returns. By this point, the gender roles were reversed, and yet it seems to me like it isn’t anymore about the marriage itself, but rather about Mizu’s hatred for and slaughtering of his own femininity, and, of course, the experience of betrayal; with his family (especially his mother, see below), and with his femininity, which wasn’t enough to keep him comfortable or Mikio on his side. (...betrayal which is also about mizu himself betraying akemi, i'd add. Mizu is justified here, but it's important to note the parallels between the two timelines i guess?)

5. That random ass baby

There is, at a certain point, a situation of peace, which I think is represented when one of the puppets is holding a blue baby (supposedly a little ronin) in its arms. I want to suppose that the baby represents newborn love between Mizu and Mikio, before it all fell apart. But the love itself is a masculine love, as we see that it is based on masculine exchanges (fighting, doing fieldwork, taming horses, riding together, whatever) and, it seems to me, assimilable to homosexuality between samurai, which was widespread (insert something about Taigen here). Also Mikio wanted to marry a bro lmao. Aside from that, on the level of Mizu’s self-perception, it might represent comfortableness, a sort of congruence, or, rather, a compromise, that Mizu is able to live in, between natural masculinity and performed femininity - opening up to show vulnerability, love fragile as a creature that cannot defend itself, innocent, naive, trusting.

6. About Mizu’s mother.

The puppet used for Mizu’s mother before the role reversal is the same that is supposedly used for Mizu after, but I latch onto a detail: the pattern on the puppet’s kimono is the same as the (real life) Mother’s kimono (see for example minute 12:30). I support this by noting the more obvious parallel between the blue worn by Mizu and the blue of the Ronin puppet, but at the same time I'm forced to note that after a certain point the mother has her own puppet. In any case, I see the mother and the feminine puppet wearing the same kimono as being about femininity, and about the mother’s betrayal of her child, rather than about Mizu herself. For one, manipulating him into marrying and abandoning the vow. But also we learn (ep 8) that the woman isn’t Mizu’s mother at all. One could discuss the reliability of Fowler’s statement, but I feel there are more clues regarding the mother’s betrayal: the episode starts with the Ronin, who feels the storm rage inside him at the killing of his lord (Mizu’s actual mother, perhaps) by the hands of a clan whose crest was the Phoenix (which I suppose are the white men, and the curse of whiteness for Mizu). I’ve thought about the four white men dealing guns (Fowler), flesh, opium (and I’m not sure what role “Violet” has in this, but I think they're the opium dealer), and thought that if Mizu’s “mother” was a substitute, the opium she smokes could point to Mizu’s potential father, perhaps even at the surrogate mother keeping contact, and at the surrogate’s betrayal at the same time. But it’s also true I watched the show while stoned, so I would dismiss this.

7. Onryo (note: characteristic in kabuki)

When the birth of the vengeful spirit occurs, I see very well how plausible it is to say that, actually, the rage that Mizu feels is feminine rage, and I agree with that. Mizu’s femininity is his rage, it is heavily related to the mother-daughter relationship, despite the fact that at a certain point the mother has her own puppet. At the same time, however, it is to me the result of the slaughtering of the performed femininity needed to respect the obligation (we remember the wedding was also to ensure the “surrogate” mother safety, especially financial, as well as to keep Mizu bound), just as accepting you’re able to fight with any tool puts an end to the compensatory movement by which you’re trying to prove masculinity to an observer (which, say, Taigen does as well, wanting to prove to Mizu he can beat him - plus, Taigen himself is the one to reassure Mizu on the complete unimportance of it, see how I read the sword symbol a few paragraphs earlier).

In this perspective, the "dye washing away from her kimono" to me means two things: that being what he is is inevitable, and that the feminine rage sets in; Mizu tries to make up for being a "demon", but in the end rejects the obligation towards his husband, and towards her mother; the pattern is not the same anymore, and Mizu is somehow more like his own person, returning on the path of vengeance, strengthened by the feminine, as the reforged sword will be strengthened by the very ritualistic yaki-ire.

Episode 8,

I feel, speaks instead for itself, for the dysphoric reaction is to me extremely clear. Reacting that way to being called a Miss is not a cisgender reaction. You’ll tell me: it’s not a dysphoric reaction! It’s a reaction of disgust to being fetishized for being a woman! And that’s plausible, supported by the “you just keep getting better,” with clear sexual implication, except I think that is also a fundamental trans experience and one cannot limit the way they read the scene to an exclusively feminine experience.

In conclusion,

I don’t think it might be all boiled down Mizu being a masc woman, because of the trans coding. Mizu thinks of himself as a guy. If not a guy, not a woman either. You’ll tell me: “Of course she does, because she’s grown up that way; she was forced to sustain the lie to preserve her life! It's a matter of conditioning!” And while it is true that the initial context points towards crossdressing, and not inherent feelings of gender non conformity or transgenderism, I feel that if Mizu really felt like a woman, he wouldn’t have such exaggerated reactions, and I don’t think they come from his temperament either. And it is disproved that conditioning someone to have a different sexuality or gender identity works in any way - I doubt Edo period Japan or a particular protagonist would make an exception. "But Mizu herself tells Mikio she didn't want to be a man, she had to be one!" Yes, because it is true. But it points to crossdressing. If it were aimed to explain the whole of Mizu's experience of gender in her self, it would invalidate the entirety of episode 5.

In any case, even in situations where he couldn’t be discovered, Mizu does not allow feminine terms or titles, or tries as best to stop them from happening; plus, it’s rather obvious how difficult the relationship with his body is.

While, once again, reading Mizu as a binary trans man is not enough, I feel like reading him as cisgender isn’t, either. As if, in any case, the feminine experience and the transmasculine one didn’t overlap in many aspects, also during the most tumultuous parts of transition, if pursued.

What is funniest above all is that the whole discourse is substantially useless. The layers of the show open to an infinite variety of interpretations, none of them fundamentally wrong. Mizu’s just quite literally Mizu. It’s a queer unlabeled thing and that’s it. If you take the Lacanian concept of the Real as the hole, properly uninteligible, surrounded by the Symbolic, you'll find that "Queer" is exquisitely representative of the Real, and therefore every label (the Symbolic) is reductive of the perceived experience (indeed the Real). The fundamental lesson about gender that you can derive from the show is that gender is a performative construct. What it pushes you to do is deconstruct your principles, especially if you are queer, since we are all entrapped in the modern western white need for strict labelling; that’s where this whole debate comes from, and it is, once again, pointless.

So, instead making fun of other people because of a set of pronouns, perhaps it would be better to imagine that more options can cohabit together, or that there is no need to label at all. Also be careful about accusing others of a complete lack of media literacy - you should thoroughly examine yours first.

Interesting articles i guess:

Algoso, Teresa A. "'Thoughts on Hermaphroditism': Miyatake Gaikotsu and the Convergence of the Sexes in Taishō Japan." The Journal of Asian Studies 65, no. 3 (2006): 555–573. Algoso, Teresa A. "Not Suitable as a Man? Conscription, Masculinity, and Hermaphroditism in Early Twentieth-Century Japan." Chap. 11 In Recreating Japanese Men, edited by Sabine Frühstück and Anne Walthall. Berkeley: University of California Press, 2011, 241–261. Mostow, Joshua S. “The Gender of Wakashu and the Grammar of Desire.” In Gender and Power in the Japanese Visual Field, edited by Joshua S. Mostow, Norman Bryson, and Maribeth Graybill. Honolulu: University of Hawai’i Press 2003, 49–70.

taken from this post asking about transgender men in the edo period: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/p6x4jk/comment/h9ttgv4/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

As a final unrelated note, I haven’t seen anyone praise the MASTERFUL sound design

bye 🪳🪳🪳🪳🪳

#blue eye samurai #bes #mizu blue eye samurai #queer #queer coding #trans coding #mizu #media analysis #mizu gender #mizu trans man #mizu transgender #in this essay i will #mizu trans #mizu bes #nonbinary #genderqueer #transgender character

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