#cm incorrect

[xervoxs]

Hotch*checking under the bed*

Hotch: see no monsters in here

Reid: and closet..

Hotch*opening the closet*: see..

Hotch: Emily?

Hotch: come out, now

Emily: i'm lesbian

Morgan*coming out of nowhere*: i knew it

Reid*screams*

Hotch: what the..

[ssa-atlas-alvez]

Spencer: *2 hours into a 6 hour flight* New fear unlocked: what if I put a pimple patch on and I eat it? This hasn't happened, just to clarify, but what if it did?

[patrickispinky]

Derek: are you the big spoon or the little spoon?

Emily: i'm the knife

Jj: *from across the room* she's the little spoon

[sarcasm-and-stiles]

[spencestiel-michelle]

*the BAU team noticing Y/n and Spencer Reid*

Emily: hey- Derek. look at how close they’re standing. 

Garcia: they’re practically breathing the same oxygen. 

Derek scoffs: that kid’s got nerve. yesterday he literally took a whole step away from me when I stood too close to him- went on about something like germs in the air or whatever. 

Garcia: yeah, well, my love, you are not Y/n. 

[lilliejareau]

yall is just me or does david rossi lowkey have the same vibe as manny from ice age?

do they look alike? is it the hair swoop? idk but it’s SOMETHING

[incorrect-ralvez]

Derek, at Emily's funeral: I need a moment with her.

Everyone: Of course.

Derek, leaning over Emily′s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead.

Emily: No comment

[velvetwilde]

What was the reason to look this damn hot?

[criminal-mindsincorrect]

Reid smiling at his phone, watching Bluey with headphones on

Emily, walking behind him : What are you watching ?

Reid, full panic mod, slamming his phone screen on his desk : P*RN. ADULT THINGS. BECAUSE I AM AN ADULT. LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE WHY DON'T YOU TRUST ME EMILY

[ralvezfanatic]

Y/N, to Spencer while straddling his lap: Glasses stay on during sex.

Spencer, who was about to take his glasses off: Oh, um.. okay.

Y/N: Wait I meant that as in my glasses. I'm blind as fuck.

Spencer, slightly confused: Oh. *moves his hand to take his glasses off*

Y/N: Wait no, keep yours on too, they're super hot

Spencer, still confused and now flustered: ...

[demonicbaby666]

Emily: [flips monopoly board over] Hotch: Prentiss! Emily: This is why your wife is dead Reid: Emily! Emily: This is why your girlfriend is dead Morgan: Emily: This is why you’re bald Morgan: I DIDNT SAY SHIT!

[xervoxs]

emily: fuck

hotch *covering spencer's ears"

hotch: not in front of the kid

jack: fuck?

[myanxietydemonaretootired]

Hotch: look at this team, we have everything. We have lesbians *points to Tara and Emily*, we have bisexuals *points to Spencer and JJ*, we have a guy who thinks he's straight *points to Alvez* we have a magical creature *points to Penelope*, we have trauma *points to a giant mirror*, and we have a tiny italian man *points to Rossi*

[patrickispinky]

Emily: i can't find my pen. are you sitting on it again?

Y/n: no.

Emily: stand up.

Y/n: i don't want to.

Emily: why?

Y/n: *mumbling* because i'm probably sitting on your pen 😔

[sarcasm-and-stiles]

Reid: *sneaks into the house late*

Hotch: *turns in swivel chair* care to tell me where you were?

Reid: I was at a…foreign film festival with…uh…Y/N!

Reader: *also turns in swivel chair* Want to try again?

[spencestiel-michelle]

Hotch: he’s our new agent? 

Gideon: he’s a genius with three phd’s, Aaron. very perceptive, very insightful, and very useful for our unit. 

*Hotch looks over at Spencer Reid* 

Hotch: he just knocked over all the coffee stirrers and i can see green dinosaur and pink striped socks sticking out his sneakers, Jason. 

Gideon: well, hey, he did fail his physical fitness exam and… you know, he wears socks, Hotch. 

Hotch: really? oh, great. that’s good. let’s hire him immediately, and give him a gun and budge right now. 

Gideon: excellent. 

Hotch: